#bungou stray dogs incorrect quotes

[iwanttohugsigma]

Dazai: *Flips a coin* Heads you kiss me, tails we make out.

Chuuya: *Makes coin float away*

Dazai:

Dazai: Alright, we’re fucking.

[sunnikos]

*Atsushi looking extremely beating up after his latest sparring session with Akutagawa*

Junichirou trying to cheer him up: C'mon Atsushi, Akutagawa can't be good at everything!

Dazai: Who knows, he might be a terrible kisser~

Atsushi: No, Akutagawa is good at that too.

Juni and Dazai: ...

[f1ght-or-flight]

Dazai, in a high voice, holding Barbie: hey Ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career!

Chuuya, in a deep voice, holding Ken: nonsense Barbie. You're staying home and having my kids

Kouyou: what the fuck are you guys doing?

Dazai, still holding the Barbie: playing systematic oppression

[hopefully-helpful-daemon]

Dazai: *casually taking four stairs at a time*

Chuuya, falling behind, taking two stairs at a time: Fuck you Fuck you Fuck you Fuck you Fuck you-

[chuuyaxsupremacy9]

Dazai: realises that he is in love with chuuya

Dazai: I'm supremely fucked

Dazai: and I also want to be supremely fucked

[candysmiles373]

Atsushi: "You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?"

Kunikida: "Several traffic violations."

Yosano: "Three counts of resisting arrest."

Ranpo: "Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks." <-- Drank all of them.

Dazai: "Also, that's not our car."

[knockyasocksoff2022]

Incorrect Quote

*some time in the future* Chuuya: Looking good today, Dazai Dazai: We've been married for three years, Chibi. You don't have to call me by my surname anymore. Chuuya: Huh? *turns away from the mirror to face his husband* Oh, I was talking to myself.

[incorrect-bungo-stray-dogs]

Port Mafia Enemy: I invited you into the woods because I crave the most dangerous game.

Young Dazai and Chuuya, nodding: Knife monopoly.

Port Mafia Enemy:

Port Mafia Enemy: I was actually gonna hunt you for sport, but now I'm interested in whatever the fuck knife Monopoly is.

[saelxa]

Kouyou : You're grounded

Chuuya: No I'm not >:(

Chuuya: *floats on ceiling defiantly*

Chuuya: Now I'm ungrounded see

[b33sblog]

Atsushi: I owe you one.

Dazai:Thats ok. You can just date me.

————————-

Dazai: I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. no response

Atsushi: wow they sound stupid

Dazai:But they’re not, they’re really smart actually just dense

Atsushi: Maybe you just need to be more obvious. Like I don’t know….”hey! I love you”

Dazai: I guess your right. Hey atsushi I love you

Atsushi: See! Just like that

Dazai: Holy fucking shit

Atsushi: if that flys over their head they are way to dumb for you dazai!

Dazai: Atsushi.

————————

Atsushi: so if you where in bed with me what would you do?

Dazai: that depends…..is your bed comfy?

Atsushi: I would like to say so.

Dazai: I would sleep.

———————-

[koiblossom5]

mushitaro: my life is in the hands of an idiot! atsushi, pointing to himself and kyouka: no no no, TWO idiots!

[iwanttohugsigma]

Chuuya: How do we wake him up?

Dazai: True love’s kiss!

Chuuya: What?

Dazai: I kiss him and he wakes up.

Sigma: *Sits up* I’m awake! Don’t kiss me!

[sunnikos]

Atsushi: I didn’t even pay much attention to what you were talking about, you’re so beautiful.

Akutagawa: Thank you love, I was talking about how I almost got killed.

[all-too-random]

BSD Incorrect Quotes

Chuuya: I’m going to take you out

Dazai: Great, it’s a date!

Chuuya: I meant that as a threat.

Dazai: See you at five!

[hopefully-helpful-daemon]

*early on in the ADA*

Kunikida: *chokes on something*

Yosano: Jeez, Kunikida, don't die on us.

Kunikida: Don't tell me what to do, I'll die whenever the hell I want!

Yosano:...

Ranpo:...

Kunikida:.. I apologize, that was instinctive.

[sakyira]

Dazai: We are taking this young lady hostage!

Chuuya: No. Overruled.

Dazai: I overrule your overruling

Chuuya: Must you be so difficult?!