#bungou stray dogs incorrect quotes

[iwanttohugsigma]

Atsushi: Why did you cut my leg off!?

Akutagawa: Because you made me mad!

Atsushi: All I said was “Do you want ramen tonight?” And then you cut my leg off!

Akutagawa: I don’t want ramen I want pork buns!

Atsushi: Then tell me like a damn human being not some damn rabid animal! This is why you don’t have any friends!

[f1ght-or-flight]

Dazai, in a high voice, holding Barbie: hey Ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career!

Chuuya, in a deep voice, holding Ken: nonsense Barbie. You're staying home and having my kids

Kouyou: what the fuck are you guys doing?

Dazai, still holding the Barbie: playing systematic oppression

[hopefully-helpful-daemon]

Dazai: *casually taking four stairs at a time*

Chuuya, falling behind, taking two stairs at a time: Fuck you Fuck you Fuck you Fuck you Fuck you-

[chuuyaxsupremacy9]

Dazai: realises that he is in love with chuuya

Dazai: I'm supremely fucked

Dazai: and I also want to be supremely fucked

[candysmiles373]

Atsushi: "You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?"

Kunikida: "Several traffic violations."

Yosano: "Three counts of resisting arrest."

Ranpo: "Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks." <-- Drank all of them.

Dazai: "Also, that's not our car."

[knockyasocksoff2022]

Incorrect Quote

*some time in the future* Chuuya: Looking good today, Dazai Dazai: We've been married for three years, Chibi. You don't have to call me by my surname anymore. Chuuya: Huh? *turns away from the mirror to face his husband* Oh, I was talking to myself.

[incorrect-bungo-stray-dogs]

Port Mafia Enemy: I invited you into the woods because I crave the most dangerous game.

Young Dazai and Chuuya, nodding: Knife monopoly.

Port Mafia Enemy:

Port Mafia Enemy: I was actually gonna hunt you for sport, but now I'm interested in whatever the fuck knife Monopoly is.

[saelxa]

Kouyou : You're grounded

Chuuya: No I'm not >:(

Chuuya: *floats on ceiling defiantly*

Chuuya: Now I'm ungrounded see

[darkreunioniscoming]

Fyodor: I donate my blood in the hopes that my blood will overpower theirs and take control of their body, so I can gain another vessel to use at my own will.

Dazai: Is that why you haven't been attending my tea parties?

Fyodor: What?

Dazai: I have to invite Chuuya! And sometimes Atsushi.

Fyodor: Why would I go to one of your 'Tea Parties'. You're seriously just going to poison my drink.

Dazai: I don't poison the drinks. Chuuya does.

Chuuya in the back, pouring poison into a tea cup: It's so much fun!

[koiblossom5]

mushitaro: my life is in the hands of an idiot! atsushi, pointing to himself and kyouka: no no no, TWO idiots!

[iwanttohugsigma]

Dazai: Fuck you Chuuya!

Chuuya:*Not even thinking* Fuck me yourself, mackerel!

Dazai: *Unzips pants* Alright.

Chuuya: *Runs* Fuck no!

Dazai: *Chases him* I’m honoring your request, Chuuya~!

Kunikida: *Sent Dazai to get rid of Chuuya* HOW THE HELL DID THAT WORK?!

[all-too-random]

BSD Incorrect Quotes

Chuuya: I’m going to take you out

Dazai: Great, it’s a date!

Chuuya: I meant that as a threat.

Dazai: See you at five!

[hopefully-helpful-daemon]

*early on in the ADA*

Kunikida: *chokes on something*

Yosano: Jeez, Kunikida, don't die on us.

Kunikida: Don't tell me what to do, I'll die whenever the hell I want!

Yosano:...

Ranpo:...

Kunikida:.. I apologize, that was instinctive.

[b33sblog]

Atsushi: I owe you one.

Dazai:Thats ok. You can just date me.

————————-

Dazai: I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. no response

Atsushi: wow they sound stupid

Dazai:But they’re not, they’re really smart actually just dense

Atsushi: Maybe you just need to be more obvious. Like I don’t know….”hey! I love you”

Dazai: I guess your right. Hey atsushi I love you

Atsushi: See! Just like that

Dazai: Holy fucking shit

Atsushi: if that flys over their head they are way to dumb for you dazai!

Dazai: Atsushi.

————————

Atsushi: so if you where in bed with me what would you do?

Dazai: that depends…..is your bed comfy?

Atsushi: I would like to say so.

Dazai: I would sleep.

———————-

[sakyira]

Dazai: We are taking this young lady hostage!

Chuuya: No. Overruled.

Dazai: I overrule your overruling

Chuuya: Must you be so difficult?!

[knockyasocksoff2022]

Atsushi *trying to have the "define the relationship" talk with Ryuunosuke: So, uh, Ryuu, you know how I feel, at least I hope you do, but, uh, I really really like you *already red as a tomato* Akuatgawa: I feel that has already been established. Clearly, you are not such a pushover that you would choose to spend so much of your limited free time with someone you do not like, Jinko, much less share clothes, and food, assign them pet names, and engage in lengthy physical contact. (A/N: He means hugs, ofc, what else could he be talking about, get your minds out of the gutter lmao) Atsushi *somehow blushing more if that's even possible*: Well, duh, but like . . . What are we? Akutagawa *confused*: We are humans, Jinko. Have you hit your head? Atsushi: No, I mean yes, but no. No, I haven't hit my head, but yes I know I'm human. . . mostly. But what are we? Akutagawa: We are ability users. Atsushi *shakes his head, sighing, unsure of how to phrase it to make Ryuu understand*: Ugh, yes, that's true, but what are WE? Akutagawa: Your past may be something of a mystery but as far as I know we are both Japanese. Atsushi *a little frustrated now*: Ryuu . . . do you LOVE me, or not!? Akutagawa *even more confused now and a little sceptical*: Of course, but what does that have to do with your sudden existential crisis? Atsushi *sighs, feeling reassured*: Oh, nothing. Just shut up and kiss me. Akutagawa: Jinko, as I hear it, it is you doing most of the talking. Atsushi *steps closer, placing a finger over Ryuu's lips* Ryuu . . . Akutagawa *steps forward to meet him with a small but gently teasing smile as he cranes his neck so his lips meet his lover's*: Fine, do as you please, Atsu . . . you are after all my boyfriend.