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min-sugar-7 · 4 years

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DAY 5: “Any other lies to tell me?” + Angst

Read it on AO3 Here!

Merlin slumped against his bed, covering his eyes and willing them not to spill. It felt stupid, really. But he was told for so long that Arthur is the other side to his coin, his other half, his soulmate. He should have known better than to think that destiny would ever favor him.

It probably would hurt less if Kilgharrah did not feed Merlin pointless lies. If he had clearly stated that there would be nothing romantic between them. Because Merlin went ahead and caught feelings, those pesky little things. At least he never got a chance to make a fool of himself.

What was he thinking? Golden Prince, Arthur Pendragon, falling for him? Of course, his true love was a 'she.' At least he never acted on his feelings. At least the only one that knows about them was himself. But it is fine. It’s not like he loves Arthur. He hates him half the time anyway.

A lie.

He is just a little bit heartbroken. Maybe a bit more than little. But he should have known better than to think that there could be anything between them. It is a miracle they are even friends, considering the number of lies Merlin has told him.

That, sadly, did not mean that Merlin got over his feelings. It hurt, seeing Arthur with someone else, but at least it was Gwen. Sweet, kind, strong, and caring Gwen. He couldn’t have chosen anyone better. She’s the best in the world.

So Merlin made sure his two favorite people were happy, even if it meant that he would be pining from a distance. He is glad that Arthur’s happy and smiling, even if those were directed to someone else. It’s fine. Destiny was a stupid thing anyway.

Well, it was fine right up until he was getting crushed under the weight of destiny. If one more person reminded him of his destiny, Merlin would scream. Merlin doubts if he can keep going, carrying the weight of the expectations of sorcerers alive and dead. Not to mention the fact that he’s considered some sort of leader to the magical community. Merlin was not trained for this, will never be trained for this, and cannot possibly live up to their expectations.

Everyone expects Emrys to be some sort of divine leader- fearless and ruthless, a guardian and protector of the magical community. Merlin isn’t Emrys. He doesn’t want to be Emrys. But every single Druid he meets bows and pays their respects and tells him how he’s such a great warlock.

Merlin might as well scream.

They treat him like a God, which is not as great as you would think. Merlin is the one to carry their dreams and expectations. Their hopes and dreams followed him around like dead weight, refusing to leave. He is required to fulfill it. It is either that or let every magical being suffer.

And he is the only one to carry the burden of fate.

He doesn’t have anyone to share it with, not even Gaius. Gaius doesn’t get it either, and never will. He treats Merlin like a son, and for that, he is very grateful. Some days he is sure he would be dead in a ditch if it weren’t for Gaius. But with Gaius, it is a bit different. For him, having Merlin is like having a God for a son, which isn’t that far from the truth. He knows that Gaius worries for him and cares for him. But Gaius also has expectations for Merlin. Expectations he’s afraid he can’t fulfill.

With each passing day, the threat to Arthur’s life grows stronger and more dangerous. Merlin cannot keep up.

Everyone who knows about Merlin’s magic also knows about his destiny. There are people that Merlin does not know that know about Merlin’s destiny. Merlin wants to yell that they are entrusting their freedom to the hands of the wrong person. That he is not the one they should be laying down their lives for. That there must be another sorcerer, one who deserves to be called Emrys.

He feels laced with guilt and regret for the lives of Alator and Finna, along with every other sorcerer's life lost for a cause that is impossible to fulfill. They have laid it all down so Merlin could hear, in painful detail, just how his King is going to die.

Merlin did scream then, in the relative privacy of the forest. Arthur’s going to die, and if Merlin doesn't prevent it, it is all on him. Arthur's death would be on him. It is going to be his fault that there will be no Albion. It is going to be his fault that magic will forever be lost to these lands. It is going to be his fault that Arthur's going to die, and he doesn't want that. He wants Arthur to live a happy and long life.

Somewhere along the line, 'Albion' sounded like 'Arthur.' If given a choice between the two, Merlin would no doubt chose Arthur. He would pick Arthur over and over again. Always Arthur. Because Arthur has become his priority, and he won't be able to live with himself if he let Arthur die. It will all be his fault.

It was his fault anyway. It was his fault Morgana turned. It was his fault that Mordred lived. It was his fault that he didn’t let Morgana die when he had the chance. It was his fault that while trying to show Arthur how good magic can be, he did the complete opposite. For Arthur, magic is something that took his mother, his father, his sister, and his wife. Merlin doubts that saving Gwen made Arthur’s opinion on magic any different.

Everything he does, everything he tries, only brings him closer to the inevitable. Arthur is going into battle at dawn, and Merlin won’t even be there.

Merlin promised Arthur that he would always protect him or die trying. A lie. He failed at both. Now Arthur’s saddled up with a piece of a sword forged in a dragon’s breath inside him, the very same dragon he should have looked after.

Aithusa, Light of the Sun, the very same dragon Kilgharrah said would bode well for Albion, for him and Arthur, and for the land they would build together.

A lie.

It is the sword drenched in her breath that brought Arthur down. Merlin did not have the heart to blame her. Merlin was the one that abandoned her, sent her straight to Morgana.

Gaius trusted him, told him that only he could save Arthur. Said that he would have a bowl of his favorite soup waiting for him, for when he would come back. He said that Arthur would be fine, that the Shide would heal him.

Another lie.

Merlin clutched the wheezing body of his love tighter as if he could will him to stay. It is all his deepest nightmares playing out. Arthur- dying in his arms- practically resenting Merlin’s magic. For all his magic and he still could not save his love.

Nothing, nothing ever could be worse than this.

Until it was.

In any other situation, anything but this, Merlin would have cherished Arthur’s last words. He despised them. He despised his final words, the last whisper of something he has never said before. He despised the way they were told- as if a confession of his deepest darkest secret.

But that is what they were. Arthur had a wife, a loving, doting wife, and yet-

And yet, his last words to Merlin had been a choked whisper of, “I love you.”

Merlin has dreamt of those words, thought about every single way Arthur would tell him. Never like this, though. But those were just that- dreams and fantasies. But Destiny was never easy, was it?

Was it all a lie? Could, heaven forbid, Arthur really love him? Or was it just words spoken out of desperation, just another lie?

Just like how his destiny was a lie? Like how Albion was a lie? Like how the Kingdom they were supposed to build, together, was a lie?

Like how everything Kilgharrah said was a lie. Like how his hopes and dreams were lies. Like how every Druid lied. Like how everything was a lie, a half-baked truth, a stupid fantasy.

“There is nothing you can do, Merlin, for all that you have dreamt has come to pass,” Kilgharrah said.

Lies.

He had failed. He’d failed Arthur. He’d failed Morgana. He’d failed Gwen. He'd failed Gaius. He’d failed Mordred, Isidir, and Freya. He’d failed Finna, Alator, and Gili. He’d failed Daegel, Balinor, and Hunith. He’d failed all the sorcerers that died during and after the Purge. He’d failed all the sorcerers living in fear. He’d failed all that sorcerers that are yet to be born.

Merlin stayed long after he sent Arthur away, no doubt his bowl of soup growing cold. He learned that Gwaine, too, had passed in a last attempt to run Morgana through. It was not supposed to be like this. It was supposed to be the three of them, Courage, Strength, and Magic, standing side-by-side, ready to face whatever destiny throws at them.

Another Lie.

He made it as far as Camelot’s gates, listening to the echoes of “Long Live the Queen,” before deciding that Camelot would prosper under Gwen’s rule. He could never, ever face her again. Not after his failure, not after the lies. Not after being the keeper of his King’s last words, which no doubt should have belonged to Gwen.

He only scried for Gaius when he felt the old man’s life slipping away. Gaius saw him and heard him, telling him that they missed him there. No doubt another lie. Merlin watched as the light behind Gaius’s eyes dimmed, saying one last goodbye to the closest thing he had to a father.

Soon it was Kilgharrah, and then Geoffrey, then Gwen, then Leon, then Percival, then Audrey, Queen Annis, Queen Mithian, Queen Vivian, Queen Elena, Isidir, Gili, Sefa…

He should have guessed that he would be punished in some way. The Gods made him immortal, forever waiting for Arthur to return. Forever waiting near the lake, never allowed to be away from Albion for long.

Excalibur might have been his only way out, but he had disposed of it into the lake soon after Arthur died. Again, that could have been a lie too.

The world changed. Green and magic got replaced by iron and steel. Aithusa passed peacefully in her sleep, never once forgiving Merlin for slaying Morgana. Magic slipped away from the land slowly, until the last tendril of magic died along with the last wizard, leaving Merlin to be the only source of magic left.

All of it seeped deep into the Earth’s core, locked away and to never be accessed, leaving the Earth barren.

Wars broke out, along with famine, storms and disasters, and death. The Lake of Avalon remained still and timeless, forever preserved by the Gods, like Merlin.

Merlin looked up at the sky, where he believed the Gods to be, long forgotten like the legend of his love and his legacy. The Gods were never merciful. They had disappeared too, the last of them forgotten like Merlin. But Merlin was forced to keep living, forever traveling the Earth, never straying too far from the lake.

“Any other lies left to tell me?” Merlin said, resigned and pitiful, as he felt the world falling apart around him. Arthur never once returned, dooming Merlin to watch as humans ripped apart from each other, unable to help. They tear themselves apart, rebuilding and rehabilitating soon after. They, too, had been cursed to keep going, destroying and restoring. And for all Merlin knew, that also could have been a lie.

#merthurweek2020 #day5 #angst #fic #prompt fill #unrequited love #requited unrequited love #immortal merlin #major character deaths #minor character deaths #lots and lots of angst #pining!merlin #bbc merlin

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douxie-casperan · 3 years

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☽ for the memory meme? :)

☽ - A memory of their father

At least a whole month had passed since the three of them had come to end up in a somehow even more scrungy apartment based in the heart of New York City and despite the chill of the air Douxie had snuck outside onto the balcony in dire need of something a bit fresher than the mustiness of inside to be alone with his thoughts. Despite all the filtration wards that had been set up to make Nari that little bit more comfortable they barely seemed to be making a dent and the second he realised he was fidgeting more than focusing on the paper sitting on the coffee table outside seemed the wiser course and so here he was.

Stupid as it might sound life of late was feeling disturbingly monotonous in how it was get up early (UGH), grab something quick to go because there wouldn’t be a chance to eat until the first shift was over, hopefully get a snack before heading to the second job then if really lucky have enough time to crawl back here to collapse somewhere with no energy left for much else except on those scarce days off eked out when the stars aligned right. The three job days were even worse, you wouldn’t think his sleep schedule could get even more erratic but it turns out the threat of higher rent could do that to anyone and he was a particularly soft target to begin with.

On top of that as someone who adores travelling staying put for long usually drove him stir crazy after a few months he was already showing signs of it happening here too. In comparison somehow Arcadia never did, maybe it was because it’d felt like a home much like Camelot had done once? Part of the reason was definitely the fact Zoe could be a constant for the first time ever compared to the days, weeks or months scattered over the centuries whereas now they were once again forced apart by both wrong end of the continent stuck with phone calls or laughing at one another over the camera only. He misses the bookshop so much work had been put into, the customers that came into Benoit’s always asking how he was doing, the novelty of not having to pretend trolls didn’t exist even if the whole Akriridon thing was a surprise not to mention the apocalypse round two that came with them. It was a good normal and one he was felt a bit lost without.

Leaving also meant that certainty of Merlin was out there somewhere waiting for his moment to pop back up really was gone, something that had been a constant reassuring thought and it’s almost like being a moored boat just one wave away from drifting to parts unknown. Much like the explosion some things that happened still didn’t seem real, more like they were more this weirdly vivid nightmare that forgot to let him wake up so was stuck in a golden haze with no way out.

Glancing through the door he can just about make out Archie perched next to Nari on the armrest having grabbed the sofa for herself and looks to be marvelling at something on the TV making him smile softly. It’s likely one of the David Attenborough docs she seemed to have become quite taken with particularly in how the camera could ‘travel’ between all these places faster than even she could. Neither had the heart to say it was clever video editing, even the magical deserved a bit of sparkle in their lives. This’ll just be for him then and that’s fair enough.

Grabbing one of the two shoddy white plastic lawn chairs he’d picked up dirt cheap with the added bonus of easy cleaning he sits down and pulls his favourite guitar into his lap. Taking a deep breath to try and dislodge anything that might be rattling around his throat that shouldn’t be he begins to strum a few testing notes and making a few minor adjustments to get things about how they’re needed. There had been words banding through his head the past twenty minutes and if they weren’t going to let themselves be written down then going straight to testing will have to do he supposed. Using the staff was an option but… Maybe when he is more certain that he won’t be spit balling something terrible, on the fly usually fell one way and not always in the positive.

Grazing the strings once then a second time, the wizard begins to quietly sing not at all caring who might hear.

~*---*~

Within the earliest boughs of Spring

Everything felt fresh, new and wild

Full of possibilities it could bring

Was spared a sword and led away

Into the court of a King

Things were so innocent back then

Night became day and day into night

With chores as endless as my curiosity

Who could have imagined such a sight?

An orphan free to roam in a castle

Yet easily scared by a simple knight

I guess it was only a matter of when

As I grew older things started to change

You saw something coming, didn’t you?

I noticed, I did, even thought it strange

You grew quieter and the arguments worse

Everything I knew had started to rearrange

Spring was finally coming to an end

That Summer would burst into life

Blazing ready to reduce everything to ash

It sensed blood and carried a long knife

Poked and prodded them all just so

Then marvelled at the ensuring strife

With hindsight it was such an obvious trend

Within your fabled workshop

You would perfect the Amulet

After working for hours and hours nonstop

A weapon to save Camelot you said

But it was not humans it would adopt

To Trolls instead it would ascend

Killahead came ordering lines to be redrawn

I remember that Arthur was lost first

Wasn’t this supposed be a new dawn?

Yet I lost a sister, a Master, a home

And only more resentment did it spawn

There was only Archie now I could depend

Time started to become rather slippery

Though I did what you bade to the letter

Silently we became watchers of history

Dwelling in this brand new Autumn

I was spending it in as much happiness as misery

Some days it was much harder to pretend

During a trip to Babylon fought a specterghast

Helped move a strigoi on that was haunting folks

Honestly the adventures have been unsurpassed

The people, the food, all of the places

The future started to seem so much brighter than the past

Even met someone who’d one day be more than a friend

Learned far more than I dared dream

Visited places beyond imagination

Though couldn’t say much for my self esteem

All I wanted was to do right by you

I guess my life had a running theme

One that the passing years alone would never mend

Eventually the leaves began to fade

It must have started when I settled in Arcadia

Then upon a day when the world fell into shade

The first sign came in the form of an eclipse

To protect people I stood there unafraid

As the Winter began to descend

Seeing you again was like some form of rehash

Current or younger we argued just the same

Then suddenly my entire world was over in a flash

You even said you were proud of me

Before in my arms you turned to ash

And to another plane you would transcend

It would all came down to one last spell

I fought so hard for us all

But it was time for a final farewell

Everything moved too fast

No one was left to catch me when I fell

Only hearts to rend

Goodbye

It was so hard to say

This second chance, a retry

I love you both, I hope you know?

No matter what that was never a lie

Not being here though, it’s hard to comprehend

But I’m still here

The path ahead is clear

I refuse to simply disappear

No longer bowing to my own fear

Every word is spoken sincere

Because my time is now

This life is my own to walk

~*---*~

As the last few words leave his lips he is not ashamed to admit that tears had started falling probably about four verses back and are still coming so he tries to rub the evidence away on a sleeve. Unfortunately all it ends up doing is smearing salt into blue eyeshadow leaving him even more of a mess than he’d started plus an aching chest. It hurts so damn much but it is a good hurt, a reprieve.

“Some grand tribute, huh? Still can’t do much without it all setting me off again.” It is said half sighed while leaning back where he is barely able to make a single star out because of all the lights that blare well into the night unknowingly snatching away another source of comfort. But they’re still there he knows, watching as they have his entire life. Nothing is forever in the world of magic nor in life, not as long as somebody is still there to talk about it.

“Thank you for everything, Master.”

#Anonymous #No facts truer than a good meme #Trollhunters #3Below #ToAWizards #Tales of Arcadia #Wizards #A future on the run

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laceymorganwrites · 4 years

Text

The Story of the sad chapter 15

Word Count: 2,367

Pairing: Ban x reader

Warnings: cursing

Summary: The Rescue Mission continues

Taglist; @lysawayne

“Okay, lovely reunions aside, we gotta go save the princess now” you hated to be the one who destroyed this precious moment, but someone had to do it.

It wouldn´t be good if you stayed here any longer than you needed to.

“You should´ve said that at the beginning, dear” Merlin smirked and forced Elizabeth´s location out of Vivian.

As soon as she uttered the words, Merlin teleported you in front of the king´s room, something was holding her back though, it was the perfect cube, a demonic barrier.

Not that that was a problem for Merlin, who immediately canceled the magic, making you able to enter the room.

Elizabeth headed straight for Meliodas to hug him, it was bittersweet. She didn´t remember him yet and still her feelings were prevalent.

You wondered if you would ever be able to harbor such a strong love for another person and if they would for you.

Before you could sink into your thoughts any more, Dreyfus entered the room and had all of you on guard.

However instead of fighting you, he broke down on the floor in shame, admitting to the crime of killing his own brother, the very reason you had to flee in the first place. Before you wasn´t a holy knight, he was merely a broken man eaten alive by his guilt now.

He also informed you that Hendrickson´s plan was to bring forth another holy war.

After hearing that his son was alive, he obliged and obediently walked himself into the dungeon to await his trial.

Merlin took a look at the king´s health and stated that he needed to be treated immediately, however this would only be possible in Camelot where she had all of her supplies.

“I´m coming with you!” you said.

Merlin only raised an eyebrow but then chuckled.

“I suppose you would, after all it´s where your weapon lies… however it got there, I cannot remember” she smirked.

She teleported you, Arthur and the king to Camelot´s castle where she treated him.

“Arthur, show (Y/N) where her sword is” she smiled mischievously.

“You mean the one you told me to guard?” he asked and you cocked an eyebrow, why would he have to guard your sword? It´s not like it would wither and nobody was able to steal it.

He showed you around the castle and then stepped through a secret hallway leading into a big room plastered with all kinds of weapons and armor of the goddess clan.

It felt like a twisted version of home.

“What the hell...where did she get all of this? Well, I suppose if anyone would be able to, it´d be Merlin. But still...” you looked around the room in wonder, subconsciously remembering your old days as a soldier, as the head of the holy army.

It was sick but it filled you with pride, you were good at it, very much so and even better at strategy.

But still, there had to be a reason why you remembered so much of your past recently.

“Merlin said you could take anything you want, she also told me to tell you to view this room as your personal closet” he awkwardly smiled at you.

You had to chuckle, that was so typical of her.

“Well, thanks a bunch for all of this, but I have to go back now” you said as you went back to say goodbye to Merlin, sword in hand.

“If you ever need anything else, just give me a call” Merlin smiled at you before she teleported you back to the capital.

You landed right amidst the action, it seemed.

“Holy shit, what the fuck is going on?” you asked, looking around you saw only ruins of the castle, two holy knights wincing in pain and your friends, boyfriend and another holy knight.

“Hell if I know, whatever it is we have to make it stop” Diane said.

“Babe!” Ban came up to you and hugged you tight, kissing your cheek.

“I missed you...” he nuzzled your neck.

Warmth spread through your body as you let yourself fall into his touch for an instance, this, whatever this was, whether it was true or not, it felt right.

Yes, Gowther did spread some doubt in your mind about the reason you got into this relationship, but you wouldn´t let that hinder you.

You were always better at fighting when you had something to protect, even if that something was immortal and handsome.

“(Y/N)! You got your sword back!” Elaine exclaimed, clapping her hands and cheering for you.

“Finally joined the party, eh?” Meliodas joined you, teasing you.

But before any more casual conversation could be held, Jericho transformed into the same monster that Meliodas, Ban and King fought a while ago.

Apparently it was a malfunction on holy knights who have been given demon blood.

The thought that Hendrickson did that still made you sick to your stomach.

He suddenly appeared in front of you, clad in a demonic aura as the new generation of holy knights all transformed into beasts.

“Okay so, how the fuck do we go about this? Mel, you told me that those beasts could only be defeated once you killed the person inside, right? There has to be another way!” you called out to him.

There was too much chaos to get a clear head or overview, everything happened too quickly.

Meliodas and Gilthunder tried to take on Hendrickson, however he ordered Vivian to take Margaret and Elizabeth as hostages, making the men startle for a second.

A second he used to slice them down.

Elizabeth did something very brave and stupid at that moment, she offered to go with Hendrickson in return for Meliodas´ and Gilthunder´s life.

She always thought about others before herself, which made her so strong.

“Mel, I know what you´re thinking, but we need to think this through. We need a rescue Elizabeth team and one that deals with those fuckers” you pointed at the beasts that were once holy knights.

All he gave you was a pained expression.

“I´ll heal your wounds, give me a sec” you knelt down at his side and applied your magic.

“Okay, we need to contain those monsters before we know what to do with them that doesn´t kill the person inside. I can´t afford them to wreak any more havoc. Somebody needs to get the citizens into a safe space. So that´ll be two teams. And then the last one is the rescue team. King, Diane, Gil and Howzer, you go defeat the beasts. Gowther, Hawk and Elaine, get the people to safety. Ban, Mel and I will rescue the princess.” you knew it wasn´t your place but someone had to put order and clear instructions into the heads of the scared, otherwise nothing could be done.

Nothing could be achieved by being frozen in fear.

Meliodas nodded, getting back up on his feet.

You ran into the direction where Hendrickson´s magic was coming from, apparently Dreyfus fought him as of right now.

Dreyfus was on your side, but even if you arrived in time to save the princess you doubted that the four of you could take Hendrickson on.

You might have been able to if you had had the opportunity to train with your sword longer, it should come to you easily, but maybe ten years was just too long. Not to mention Meliodas was exhausted, even though you healed his wounds.

And while Ban couldn´t take any longterm damage from Hendrickson, you doubted he could deliver any to him.

It was hopeless. And yet you couldn´t just stand around and continued moving forward.

When you arrived you saw only the remains of Dreyfus´ armor and a bleeding Elizabeth.

You hoped Ban and Meliodas would be able to distract Hendrickson long enough for you to heal her and get her to safety.

Without thinking you flew past him, grabbed Elizabeth and healed her in the process of leaving her in the care of Elaine and Hawk who alongside Diane and the others came into your direction to help.

You told Elaine and Hawk to get to safety before you joined the fight again.

“Mel, if we´re lucky he won´t be able to take the demonic magic any longer, so let´s hit him with everything we got. Make it count” you husked, a determined look in your eyes as you swung your sword as the first attack against Hendrickson.

Ban watched in awe as your blade stroke his skin, making him wince in pain. It´s been while since he´s seen you go all out on someone and damn were you a sight to behold.

So graceful, so elegant, so utterly beautiful. He had to watch out not to get distracted too much by you.

“Yes babe! Get him!” he cheered for you and the others followed your example, fiercefully attacking Hendrickson.

As the battle commenced it was revealed that Hendrickson hid a red demon corpse in a hidden cave which he claimed to be the source of it all.

It enraged you beyond belief, how he said that without any remorse, without any tone change in his voice, he even sounded proud of it, of himself.

“You disgust me...” you balled your fists, shaking as tears streamed down your face.

“How the fuck could you make them drink that?! Aren´t you ashamed of yourself, you piece of shit? I´m gonna fucking obliterate you and you bet your ass I´m gonna make it hurt” you lashed out at him, your wings subconsciously raised you higher as you started an attack from above, slashing at his shoulder with all force.

“Ashamed? Why should I? Just look at all the success I´ve had with this… I´m invincible” he sardonically smirked.

“If only Mael didn´t steal my place as one of the four archangels and I had his sword, I would´ve killed you back when we first found out about you, but now this´ll have to do!” you kicked him in the guts and held him down, about to give him the final stab when he grabbed onto your wings and broke them.

You saw red as the pain emitted into your body like hot lava, almost making it burst. Your wings hung loosely down your back and you couldn´t move them, they were now a mere burden to you.

“You fucking bastard!” Ban rushed to your side and got you out of harm´s way, only refusing to hit Hendrickson when Meliodas actively held him back.

“Ban.” Elaine stated coldly, there was so much anger inside of her small body she couldn´t contain it, she would have her revenge.

“Let´s end this. Once and for all, we did it once, we can do it again. It´s time for vengeance, for the forest, for (Y/N), for all the misery this thing caused” she grit her teeth, collecting all of her magic in the palm of her hands and pointing it at Hendrickson, making him fall down the hole that was created when the demon was revealed.

“Fucking hell, this hurts like a bitch...” you twisted your arms behind your back to reach your wings to heal them, but it seemed like you had exhausted your healing magic for the day.

“Don´t force yourself, (Y/N). We´re gonna take him down, no matter what” Meliodas told you, carrying you to the side of the battlefield with a dark look in his eyes.

“Diane, you stay back with (Y/N). Watch that nothing happens” Meliodas ordered as the rest went down the hole into the cave.

“We´ll be right back, darling...” Ban held your face in his hands, caressing your cheek. “Just stay put, okay? Diane, make sure she´s not into too much pain. Please watch out for her for me” he pleaded with a worried look on his face before he kissed your forehead one last time and joined the others.

“You can count on me!” Diane nodded determined and sat down beside you.

“Poor (Y/N)...is there anything I can do to help?” she hated being tall, especially in moments like this she felt useless. A dear friend was hurting and she couldn´t do anything but sit by and watch.

“No...I´ll have to wait until my magic is restored, I think with enough stretching I can heal myself. But it hurts like a bitch...” you forced a smile.

“Maybe we can talk to distract you from the pain? Hey, let´s talk about Ban! That´s sure to brighten up your mood” she smiled at you.

“Yeah, it sure is...” you returned the smile.

“I don´t know what I did to deserve him, but I feel like if I question it too much all the happiness will just go away and I don´t want that. But if I don´t question it then I´ll never be sure...” you rested your chin on your legs.

“Sure of what?” Diane tilted her head.

“Whether I truly love him...whether I´d be able to recognize the feeling even if it hit me in the face or if I´m even capable of such a wonderful thing...” you shared your thoughts with her, watching her frown.

“Well, with your past it´s only natural that you´d feel this way. I can´t tell you how to feel but I can tell you the things I noticed that changed about you when you and Ban got together. You´re happier, it shows, you´re so free and light all the time, it´s contagious, it´s like your smile and happiness washes over to the rest of us. And you´re much more relaxed too, it´s like a burden has been lifted off you. I like seeing you happy like this, I never liked it when you were so depressed over things long past and unchangeable… and (Y/N)? I can see the same changes in him too. He´s so soft and gentle around you, I´m envious of what you have, it´s just so beautiful” she played with her fingers.

“You think so? I didn´t notice any of that...” you felt silly, how could you not even recognize your own happiness let alone the one of others anymore? It was pathetic.

“It´s because you´re always in your head” Diane giggled.

#seven deadly sins #seven deadly sins imagine #seven deadly sins fanfiction #seven deadly sins fanfic #ban x reader #sds #sds imagine #sds fanfiction #sds fanfic #nanatsu no taizai #nanatsu no taizai imagine #nanatsu no taizai fanfiction #nanatsu no taizai fanfic #nnt #nnt imagine #nnt fanfiction #nnt fanfic

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the-fiction-witch · 3 years

Text

The King And Queen p2

REAL LIFE X SWORD IN THE STONE COUPLE: TBS X READER RATING: CUTE AND FLIRTY

I Sighed as I kneeled on the kitchen floor scrubbing it with the little brush often having to dunk it back in the soapy bucket.

"Hey kiddo" Mrs Livi smiled as she came back from dinner

"Hey"

"You have fun with merlin"

"He nearly killed me again"

"You know he's just trying to help you darling"

"I know" I sighed

"He just wants to make sure your smart, and you don't end up like those broods up there" she says as she ate an apple sitting beside me "You're a smart boy Thomas. always have been"

"Have I?"

"Always, you used to sort the spoons and forks for me when you could barely reach the table" she smiled I finished up and threw my water down the drain sitting with her having an apple too "Merlin just wants you to grow up good. we all do" she says

".... What was my mum like?" I asked and I could read the sadness in her face "Please"

"I barely remember her," she says

"will you tell me? about that night?"

"We were dealing with them upstairs, and there was a woman at the gates, we went out to her, It was dark, raining, she stood there on the stone of the gates with a long cloak and... you in her arms, she begged us to take you, she cried and screamed but they refused. she explained she was dying I asked about your father and she said he was already dead, So ... I took you in, In secret. hid you down here in the kitchens till you could walk and talk" she explained

"You could have left me? to die out there with her?"

"... We could. But we didn't" she smiled "Go on up to bed, I'll finish up" she says

I gently woke up listening to the birds and other such animals in the woods singing at the morning sun, I held onto my pillow tightly trying to maintain the sweet embrace of sleep. but as usual

"What are you doing sleeping my boy! come along wake up we have lessons!" merlin yelled as he came into my room shoving my bed and going to the window opening the shuttered

"Uhhhh merlin! come on one day off!"

"Day off? you think the kings crossing these vast lands took a day off? you think they had days off to build the castles! you think fish just decide to take a day off? the birds? the wolves? get off your lazy butt you entitled boy!" He yelled

"can't you turn me into a bear today? so I can hibernate?"

"Out of bed or so help me I will transform you into something.... unnatural"

"Like what?" I groan

"ever wondered what it's like to be a worm? or a spider? or maybe I'll turn you into one of the turkeys downstairs"

"Please do! those turkeys have it better then I do" I sighed getting up and getting dressed "what are we doing today?"

"Today we go for a nice walk in the woods"

"A walk in the woods?"

"Yes"

"That's all we're doing?"

"yes"

"Fine" I sighed finishing up and heading out with him going to woods following the paths between the trees deeper and deeper into the vast, dark, thick forest

"...your not going to turn me into a wolf? or a fox? or... a fucking owl are you?"

"Don't. Question. Wizard. Business." He says hitting my head with his wand

"Owww." I complain

"Just for that you know what I'm turning you into?"

"No."

"A fucking squirrel"

"Nooooo!" I whined

"You are going to learn about preparations, and there is no creature who prepares more then a squirrel" He says

"You not turning me into a fucking squirrel!" I complained trying to run back though the path but before I could even get two steps away I was suddenly tiny and I had a tail "You have got to stop transforming me into things without consent!"

"Ohh grow up" He sighed transforming himself too, "Come along lets go and watch the squirrels" He says scurrying up the tree, I sighed and followed him up the tree he ran along the branches of the tree until he jumped from one tree to the other

"I can't do that!" I yelped

"Of course you can! your a squirrel now!"

"I may be in the body of a squirrel! but I'm still a skinny little unathletic man"

"Just jump already!" He sighed, I did my best and only just made it so he helped to pull me up onto the branch completely "see you made it thomas"

"I hate lessons with you" I sighed trying to march off "I do not want to be a damn squirrel! I am sick to death of your stupid lessons! change me back! Now! I do not want to be a damn dirty, ugly, fluffy, shit covered-" I began but noticed his little face "There is one behind me isn't there?"

"Yes" He laughed

"Am I gonna die?"

"Probably"

"Fuck" I sighed turning to see the little Y/H/C Squirrel looking at me "I'm gonna die" the squirrel moved closer sniffing me and looking at me "Please... Please don't kill me little squirrel,"

"Ohh your safe, she's a nice little girl squirrel she's just looking at you" He laughs

"she's not going to kill me?"

"No, No she probably just wants to smell you and see who you are."

"Well... hello, Miss squirrel please leave me alone" I begged but she grabbed my cheek and giggled in a strange squirrely way and grabbed my tail "AAAH! merlin!"

"Ohhhh" he laughs

"Get off!" I told her ganking my tail back but she only giggled again and jumped on me hugging me "Merlin!"

"Ohh my my" he laughs

"What!" I yelped "what she's gonna do to me!" I complained as she kept playing with my tail "Ohh will you get off!" I sighed turning to make sure she was away from me

"I think she likes you" he laughs as she wrapped her tail around me I kept trying to get away but she always followed me and tried cuddling me

"Likes me? what do you mean likes me!" I complained

"Well nature I suppose, she likes how you look, how you smell, not to mention your a boy and she's a girl,"

"But I'm not a squirrel!"

"Well she doesn't know what does she" he laughs

"Look, Miss Squirrel, your uhhh your very nice but I'm a boy" I told her which only made her wrap her tail around me tighter

"I think she knows that lad" he laughs

"Well not a boy, well not a boy Squirrel anyway. I'm a man. a human man" I told her trying to push her tail away

she giggled again and tried to hug me so I sighed and pushed her off me completely going back towards merlin who now sat against the branches laughing at me but I got many three steps before she grabbed my tail again

"Merlin! Help me!"

"And what exactly do you want me to do?"

"Turn me back? magic her away? I don't care just make her leave me alone" I sighed

"Ahhh see now here's the problem. it's there mating season" He says looking at some notes

"Mate- MATING SEASON!" I yelped "Ohh no, Oooh no! OOoh no!" I complained trying to get away from her

"That'll be why she likes you so much" He laughs

"I'm not a squirrel!"

"Well she doesn't know what, as far as she's concerned your a boy and she's a girl and... well its that time of the year."

"I. AM. Not. mating. with a fucking. Squirrel!" I complained trying to fight her away from me "Look! keep your squirrelly hands to yourself Madam! I am going home" I said pushing her away and trying to climb down the tree but she just grabbed my tail again and pulled me close to her nuzzling with my neck and wrapping her tail around me and she wrapped mine around her too "MERLIN!" I yelled "HELP ME!" I screamed and she kissed me "MERLIN!" I screamed as she kept kissing me every chance she did I pushed her away and ran down the tree "Merlin! change me back! TURN ME BACK! Turn Me Human!" I yelled running as fast as possible, hiding by the roots of the tree in hope she wouldn't find me but she had followed me and wrapped her tail around me kissing me every chance she got

"Alright, alright, I'll turn you back" He laughs changing back to and he turned me back unfortunately … because the squirrel girl was on top of me he turned her into a human too. so she was sat over me her hands on my chest, her y/h/c hair messy and un brushed, completely naked. "Ooohh my goodness!" He jumped as he saw what had happened we both just looked at each other confused and I had to admit, she was beautiful as a human. "One of those things with magic you can't always aim, now just move away and I'll change her back" He says she smiled and giggled at me nuzzling with my neck she gave me a sniff and smiled widely kissing me again, I couldn't help wrapping my arms around her and kissing back, I had never kissed anyone before but she was so egar and excited I couldn't help kissing her sweet lips back "Thomas.... Thomas to change her back you need to, move away from her" He says

I smirked pulling her closer as we kissed "One... one minuet Merlin" I said between kisses

"Thomas! Move or I turn you back into a squirrel" He warns

"..... Okay" I shrug pulling her closer

"Ohh for god- You horny boy" He complained dragging me away

"Noooo! put me back!" I complained and he turned her back into a squirrel "NOOOOO!" I complained

"I thought you wanted to turn back?" he laughs

"I did,"

"I thought you wanted her away from you?"

"I did,.... and then I didn't"

"Lets get home before you try and turn back again" he sighed

"Can I at least say goodbye?"

"Fine"

"I'm sorry little squirrel girl, But I have to go back to the castle" I told her and she looked so sad scurrying off into the tree's "Ohh, No Please I'm sorry."

"Come on Thomas, leave her be she has enough to do" He says as he headed back to the castle.

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and-damntheconsequences · 4 years

Text

AU Idea — Swapped At Birth

If someone would write this or help me write it I would love it so much but like I could never put it together in my head well enough to do it myself so... have this...

Uther had never liked sorcery. Even years before Arthur's birth, he had made his mistrust quite clear. Magic was a power he did not possess, that he did not understand. It had strengths he didn't, and nor could he undo. It made him feel weak; he refused to feel weak.

He had sorcerers in the castle, for his own protection, but even they were never quite granted the same respect as other members of the court. Nimueh was almost an exception, the one sorceress he may have called friend, but she was certainly both the first and the last. Wild tempered as she was, she knew how to play her cards to keep her position secure. But for others, Uther didn't grant the same. Crimes committed with magic were punished much more harshly, and everyone pretended to ignore the Kings bias.

So he never makes an attempt to understand the inner workings of magic — even the idea of it makes his skin crawl — and when Nimueh tells him the price of an heir, he doesn't consider it. A life will be taken, somewhere, away from him. It's his concern. He will have a son.

But Ygraine is far more level headed, and she does think this through. She knows what Uther has done, and while she doesn't confront him on it, she can't push it aside. She speaks with Gaius, with the druids, and she knows from the early months of her pregnancy, what the price will be for her son's birth. She knows, and she accepts it, for she loves this child before she can even feel his kicking against her tummy.

Ygraine never tells Uther. There is nothing she could say that could prevent what is now in motion, that could stop either what is already set in stone, or what the King may do to seek revenge — and she knows he will. Instead, she spends her time with Gaius, one of her closest friends (during the purge, Uther spares Gaius for her sake because of this) and she tries to learn what she can.

In time, she realises the risk that her son will have magic himself is much higher than she had previously thought. It scares her more than her own inevitable death. Uther will hate sorcery after this, she is certain, and for all the faith she once had in him, she cannot say for sure that he wouldn't kill his own son in cold blood if this came to be true. She is giving her life for her son, though only a few know of her sacrifice, and she will not risk anything taking him away.

When Gaius is told of this, she pleads with him to protect her child, to do anything he possibly can. Honour doesn't matter to her; Uther, the man she once loved so dearly, is far less important than this. She will keep her son alive, she must.

When he is born, she lives long enough to give Gaius his name, Arthur, before the magic bargain strips her life away for his. The baby looks much like her, and it is that which makes Gaius risk so much to protect him.

Gaius realises this child cannot stay within the castle. Uther is already issuing decree after decree, blinded by grief and rage. To grow here with magic would be suicidal. So Gaius writes to his niece, a girl in the village of Ealdor who has recently given birth, who knew the Queen and sympathises greatly... and they hatch a plan.

Hunith comes with her son to Camelot a few days after the birth. The journey is long and hard, but Hunith has lost so much already, and she knew Ygraine, and how sweet a lady she was. It is a risk she will take. Gaius is still watching over the royal baby, telling Uther that he is sick, and it is then, at the dead of night, that they swap the children.

Gaius ensures that the true royal baby bears the name his mother chose, and that the baby he is now looking after in its place has a name fitting him too. Hunith will raise a magical son, Arthur, and her true child will grow in royalty until a time comes that it is safe for both. Its hard to say goodbye, but they are good people. They would not see a newborn killed.

Merlin, who by blood is only a commoner of Ealdor, is raised to be a Prince. Arthur, who should be a future king, is raised in a small peasant village in a kingdom not his own.

It's when toddler Merlin starts doing magic that Gaius realises the mistake he's made.

But there's nothing he can do now. He cannot swap them back, because Uther has accepted this small dark-haired boy as his own. He did once mention to Gaius that the boy looked like neither of his parents. Gaius explained it away by the magic of his birth and for a moment such a rage flashed over his face that Gaius thought both he and the child would meet a swords blade. But now he has accepted it, and he cares for Merlin. There's nothing he can do now.

He curses his stupidity for many years afterwards.

While Merlin is young, Gaius keeps him drugged on various magical tinctures for much of his day, claiming to the King that his son is chronically sick. He asks druids for their help, and they give him amulets that can dampen the magic, though they can't stop it. And perhaps through willful ignorance, and intervention and deceit on Gaius' part, the child lives mostly undetected into adolescence. Though that doesn't stop him from discovering the dragon at seven years old and sneaking off to see him for many nights afterwards (and Kilgarrah finds the whole situation ridiculous, because of course he knows, but he doesn't tell Merlin, and in time he starts to look forward to his visits, telling him stories of great magical creatures and ancient druid Kings)

Morgana knows something is up though she can't say what, much of the court have heard if not believed rumours that Ygraine was having affairs (since the child looks so unlike Uther), but as far as the King and his inner council are concerned, Merlin is the heir to the throne. He is not much of a fighter despite all his training, and his diplomacy has much to be desired, but he is the King's blood nonetheless, and one day he will take the crown.

Gaius tells him of his magical talents, but explains to him that no one can know. When he is old enough, he is schooled in spell work, and slowly begins to tap into his power.

Arthur never develops any magical ability, though he does seem to be talented at getting himself into fights with the other village boys, but Hunith raises him with love and care anyway. It is sometimes hard for her to see him as one of royal blood, when he is the same boy who comes running for his mother when he scrapes his knee, and she loves his dearly for all that he is. Still, she knows that he is not hers, and she often regrets letting her own son go so far, especially now she knows that their plan has spared no one, and only put her child in danger. She and Gaius write letters often, regretting their mistake and wondering if there is any way to undo what was done, but mostly they just tell each other how the other is. He promises that Merlin is safe, she assures the same of Arthur. Sometimes Hunith visits Camelot, sees her son in glimpses, but that is all.

When the boys are both teenagers, Hunith decides she can't continue on without seeing her son before he becomes a man. She and Arthur move to Camelot.

And then somehow Arthur and Merlin both find out the truth (maybe Gwen and Morgana too) and after all the anger and tears have come forward, they have to work together to try and work out how the hell to fix this (because Arthur is far more fitted to a throne than Merlin ever was, and Merlin is honestly pretty sick of hiding like this).

#seriously if someone could write this I'd love them #but it's such a complicated and fleshed out idea in my head that makes more sense than this I promise #merlin #bbc king arthur #bbc merthur #bbc merlin #merlin fanfiction #merlin fanfic #merlin au #merlin au idea #merlin prompt #merlin writing

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emrysarthurpendragon · 4 years

Text

When they noticed his slow changes, the Emrys family had been stunned. What caused him to age again, slightly faster than his own son? One day, he had been Merlin, the goofy young man. The next, he woke up looking like a forty-year-old man. Another week passed, and he looked around forty-five. Until one day he presented a sixty-year-old grandpa. Old enough to be who he was: a father and grandfather to young Hunith. For an obscure reason, no one in the district seemed to notice the change. They still saluted him by a quick “Morning, mister Emrys”, they still ask for advice when someone got sick in their family, and they even told him he looked younger by the day. Which was fun, because he clearly did not. With his wrinkles, he felt like by now, Freya and himself could do the pair. With a sigh, the man left his couch and headed toward the door and outside, where he collected the mails. Most were just adverting for the local shops and then, there was this envelop. Brown with a delicate calligraphy on it. The letter was addressed to both Merlin and Gaius Emrys. At the moment, Gaius and Alice were at work and the old man babysat his granddaughter. Hunith was currently playing in the main room. Short after her birth, the family moved back to the countryside, in the house Merlin owned since forever. To the local, they were just the descendant of a long last lineage finally coming back to their birth land. From the window, Merlin watched the goats jumping and running. Today was a beautiful, sunny day.

“Hunith, love,” he said, chuckling when the six-months-old stopped her games, her mouth forming a perfect ‘o’ with biscuits leftovers all over her face. “Do you want to go for a walk?”

“Meeeeh Meeeh!” she half scream and giggled.

“Yes, you can pet the baby goats. But not before we clean your face. You look like a little piggy. Where is my beautiful baby girl?” Merlin teased, and the girl’s soft laugh erupted. Hunith was laughing all the time, like most kids should if they were as lucky as his granddaughter. With a wet towel, Merlin whipped her face from all the food left and they headed outside. For those who believed the UK was in a perpetual bad weather, today could definitely prove them wrong. The moment they stepped outside; various animals ran toward them in a cacophony of attention whoring beasts. Hunith had eyes for the baby goats only and giggled when one managed to lick her little feet. Unknown cats and their babies appeared too. From the distance, they heard their horse, named Lancelot. When Merlin asked his daughter-in-law when she picked that name, she just said it was fun, since he was a Merlin, to have a Lancelot around. In fact, if he had not stopped her with the Arthurian’s naming, half their animals would have such names by now. Together, first and third generation sat in the grass. Merlin smiled. The little one was so advanced compared to the others. With his help, she already tried to stand and laughed when she succeeded. At this rate, she may even talk before she turns one-year-old. Together, they enjoyed their time and Merlin cherished all the memories. With him aging again, he knew that one day, he would have to say goodbye. That knowledge pushed him to share his numerous stories with the baby. From the time he woke up on an abandoned island, with no memories, to his life with his spouse and all the happiness afterwards.

“You are so loved, baby. This world is a hard place to live in, but one day, I’m sure you can change the world. You’ll find someone you love and, if you want, build a family with them. You can even stay single if you want, because love is not just about romance, but friendships too. Friends are so important; they are the family you chose. They keep you safe and sometimes, they are a real pain. Trust me,” Merlin laughed, the vague memory of a group of men flashing for a second. “And even if it doesn’t last, you have to cherish their memories, as they helped make you the way you are now.”

How ironic, though a voice in a corner of his mind, making the former immortal frowned. Don’t be a fool, Merlin, you know deep down that you never followed your own advice. You forgot them all.

Was his conscience having a conscience? With his luck, probably. He was that kind of man. Immortal for centuries. Suddenly not that much, when he held Hunith for the first time. Now, of course, he had to debate with himself about the same past he forgot for a reason or another. Still, Merlin crawled back into reality when he heard a car coming their way. From afar, he recognised Alice’s car and so did Hunith. The child clapped her hands and rolled on the grass while laughing. Whenever he heard her, Merlin felt the world becoming purer. The weight on his shoulders lifted, leaving him with a smile and no worries. From the driveway and between the trees, the familiar grey car appeared and parked under the old oak. From the driver sit came Alice and Gaius from the passenger’s. Lately, Gaius started growing his hair slightly more and they now reached his shoulders in small waves. Merlin guessed this was so kind of new fashion among young people. He was becoming too old for these things.

“Dad,” Gaius acknowledged him, picking his daughter to kiss her on the cheek. “How was the day?”

“Good, she’s an angel, as usual. Yours?”

“Alice had to sex up a teen penis’ after he stuck it in a soda can.”

“I wonder how we, as humans, can still exist with such specimens around,” Merlin laughed. How in hell did that kid thought it a great idea? Why, in the first place, people with penises felt like putting their wee bird everywhere? “Anyway… do you want something to eat or drink? I was bored when Hunith napped and made a cake. Also, a letter came for us, I waited to open it.”

As a family they entered their home. Alice collapsed on the couch and hugged her daughter. Working women were not that common in the area and there was a lot of judgement from time to time. Merlin guessed harsh words had been spoken to his daughter-in-law by the way she held her baby. In a possessive and yet calming manner. Probably feeling her mother’s turmoil, Hunith started babbling cutely and playing with Alice’s hands while the men set the food and tea on the table. They talked and laughed together while they ate.

“So, what about that letter?”

“Oh, right!” Merlin stood and took it from where he left it earlier. They opened it with a knife and Gaius started reading. Whatever was written made him pale as he handed the paper to his father. Just like on the envelope, the writing was delicate, from the same person – nothing surprising here – but what was inside made Merlin feel dizzy and hopeful.

I know where is Freya Emrys. Come to the Isle of Rum. I’ll wait for you.

“The Isle of Rum?” Merlin murmured with a gut feeling. If he were right, and he certainly was, this was the name given to the former Isle of the Blessed. Where he opened his eyes as a new Merlin. The one place he swore he would never go back to. According to the old legends, the Isle was a portal to the land of Avalon, just like the lake in London. Funny, right? That was the reason he couldn’t even trust the old stories. How two distant places were meant to belong to the same land? It was like telling King’s Cross was both in London and Dublin. Stupid.

“You know that place? You think it’s serious?”

“I… I went here, once,” Merlin explained. “A long time ago. Way before I met your mother. When the roman’s expansion was a thing. There’s a strange energy around the place. Coming from a sword trapped in stone… no, Alice, don’t start with King Arthur again.”

“Well, the sword thing is quite obvious. You can’t deny it,” Alice answered. “Plus, what’s so bad with the legend? Some people just don’t care about it but you… you almost seem afraid. You’re a brave man, Merlin. You fought in wars we can’t even imagine, you faced Death more time than any humans… I just can’t believe mere fairy tales can scare you.”

From the corner of his eyes, Merlin noticed his son’s smirk. He knew the young man always wondered the same things as he grew up. He always noticed how Merlin flinch when the legends were mentioned. Which happened often, with a name like his. His family started wondering, after some time, if there were not some sort of correlation between the myth and his reaction. Just like Alice now. Still, if Freya had been seen near the Island or even on it – for what reasons, he wondered – he had to go. Even a small chance was more than enough. Even if it meant leaving his family for a while. As usual, Gaius knew what was on his mind before he spoke and he heard him talk.

“I’m going with you. It’s mum.”

“We leave in three days. Alice, you can find someone to babysit Hunith? I guess you don’t want to skip work, and I understand.”

“Don’t worry. Go find my mother-in-law,” she whispered, smiling at the two hopeful men.

* * *

Three days later, the two Emrys’ left their home and took a train to Mallaig and then booked a boat. They charged as much food as possible before heading to the island. When they made their route plan to the life saver, the men had been surprised. No one ever visited that place because of the dangerous waters surrounding it, except for the last week, when a woman took the same route. In a glance, both men thought Freya had been the woman and they kept that thought in mind while they navigate toward their destination. The more they went into water, the more waves became stronger and stronger. They almost fell in deep waters more than once but, by some miracles, they made it in a couple of hours and attached their boat to a pontoon. The moment they set foot to the ground, something switched in the air. Gaius frowned at his surroundings.

“It seems familiar…” he whispered. “We never travelled here together, not even when I was little?” Gaius asked, the feeling growing stronger as they speak. Merlin did not answer though. His blue eyes we widen. He too was fighting that emotion. He felt anger and sadness mix in a dangerous cocktail, ready to explode at the first spark of fire. He saw a man, waiting for him behind a door. Like a ghost he stood there, not able to cross that wall between them. He needed him but feared what may come with that person.

Two faces of the same coin… growled a deep voice inside the former warlock. Two faces? Who was the second face? That blond man? The soldier with a sad smile and slight disappointment written on his features?

“Dad?” asked Gaius worried voice. “Are you okay?”

Merlin shook his head, attempting a poor smile. He had not escaped that place for so long for no reasons. The mere thought of the sword, that cursed item lost and forgotten somewhere between the now huge forest and crumpled stones made him shiver. What if nothing had changed? Why in all the kingdoms on Earth and above had Freya decided to come here?

“Yes, sorry my dear boy. It’s just this place. It gives me the creep,” Merlin admitted, and he soon heard his son mutter a quick ‘language’, as his parents did to him in his early years. “We travelled a long way today… it’s time to sleep. I’ll set up camp and…”

“Dad, you’re old now. I can do it.”

“I can do it too, Arthur,” Merlin growled, quickly realising what he said. “Gaius. I meant Gaius.” Why did he…? And why did he almost call his son ‘prat’ like a forgotten habit with someone else? Were they memories? He knew he should not have come here in the first place. If it were not for his loving wife… well, with ‘if’ one can change the world. With Gaius, they set up camp for the night and for the first time, they slept together in the wild. Merlin always hated nights out. He always feared bandits were coming for them, mercenaries, even when the world changed enough for them to vanish in the cities.

Had not he been so tired, Merlin would have heard someone’s feet brushing against the cold green grass. He would have noticed a white hand pull a tissue on his son’s face, with enough drug to make the young doctor sleep soundly. He may even have shown surprise when the frail figure picked the biggest man with no effort before dragging him in the darkest part of the wood, deliberately leaving a trail to lead him the next morning. He missed everything, until the sun rise.

* * *

The young woman gently placed Gaius on the altar, where people of the Old Religion used to practise sacrifices long ago. The world has changed though. If magic was to come back, there won’t be such killing anymore… except if they have a chance to go back to their time. Where they had a chance to start over and change the world. Even in that case, she knew Merlin would look after all magic users with a careful eye and play with the rules. He was, after all, their king. In a way. Long ago, they were enemies. Before that, they had been close friends. A spell put on her twisted everything and turned her into a monster but now, with help coming from Avalon and time to heal, the witch felt more like herself again. Of course, Uther betrayal still hurt, but not as much as a world without magic. Yes. Morgana was back on her track and she’ll do whatever it takes to save them and allow Arthur back in the living world. She knew of Freya’s failed attempt near lake Avalon, when Merlin almost remembered but shut everything the moment Arthur’s death started submerging him again. She knew how his magic’s leftover vanished the same day his soon-to-be mother was reborn, leading the man to the land of the dead. Should he die, naturally or not, before he regained his memories and magic… and even before his mother met once more Balinor and got pregnant… he may never come back again. That’s why they were in a hurry.

“I won’t hurt you, Gaius. I know I did in the past, but I’m me again. I am the Morgana Pendragon who loves her brother and care for her friend. I just need your help for a couple of hours…” she whispered, wearing the same green dress she offended arbour in her life. “I waited for so long… just like Merlin and Mordred, I travelled through ages. I don’t know why we survived like this. I guess the Source banned Mordred and I from Avalon because we committed many crimes. It was our punishment… and when Merlin banned magic, it gave us a second chance. We often met with Mordred. He’s a good man now. He bought a farm in Ireland; he is waiting for a sign and will join us eventually. He was there when they found you in Dachau. I was too. A nurse, but no one noticed me. Except Freya, of course. I sent the letter to Merlin, telling him about the camp so he can meet us and save you.”

She continued her tale. Words flooding from her mouth and she never noticed Gaius was now awake. The young man was watching her, still groggy but focused. At least, she missed his stare until he whispered words she had not heard in a long time.

“Lady Morgana…” there was no hatred, fear or resentment in him. Just curiosity. “Am I dreaming?”

“No. You’re not. The Source is so close it makes people like us remember who they were in the past. Well, for those who died and came back,” the lady explained, pointing to a perfectly clean sword. It shone under the moon, like time never altered it for one minute. “My guess is, if you touch the sword, you will remember everything. But it’s up to you.”

“Wait… wait… why did you take me here? Where’s my dad?” Gaius asked, sliding back to his current life.

“I needed a bait, so he will come here. I’m sorry. I know he is scared of the past. But he needs to remember. We need him. The Once and Future King is waiting. He’s ready to rise, I dreamed about it… he’s waiting because without them, Albion will burn. The world will burn and all the people, men, women and children will too.”

Gaius knew, for an unknown reason, that the woman was telling the truth. He had many questions but for an answer, Morgana guided him to the sword. Something tickled his finger when he seized the hilt and pulled. The weapon did not even budge but still, he felt a burning wave rose and screamed. Memories rushed into his mind. The first time he met Merlin, as an old physician. The way the boy always got into trouble with young Prince Arthur. That time he almost got burn to protect his ward. Hunith worried letters, the way she missed her son. Wait… so now… he was his surrogate son’s son… and Hunith was his son’s granddaughter? Headache. In chaotic orders, he even remembered his first mother. The time Merlin told him about Freya, the lady of the Lake. The day Alice died in his first life; except they never had a child. When Balinor left Camelot, after the Great Dragon had been captured. Morgana, slowly turning to an evil creature, unlike the woman she was now. He remembered everything and when he looked up, tears were blurring his vision.

“I’m so happy to see you again, Milady,” he bowed, but the woman shook her head.

“I am the one who need to do this. I have harmed you so much and now, I need your help to trick Merlin into taking back the sword.”

“How, if I may ask?” this time, even Morgana noticed the change between the memory-less and memory-filled man.

“I’ll have to be like Morgause’s puppet again. I’ll have to pretend to kill you.”

* * *

Merlin ran between the trees. His legs hurt but he awoke at a scream from afar. His son’s yell of pain and he couldn’t handle it. As he rushed between the trees, getting closer to where he knew the sword was, memories harassed him.

“I’ve been training my whole life to kill people.”

“Oh, and how long I’ve you been training to be a prat?”

No. No don’t come back. I don’t want you.

“You can’t talk to me like that!”

“Sorry. I meant, how long I’ve you been training to be a prat, Milord.”

Their friendship started here. Later on, after a few months, Arthur had admitted he teased him that day, just to see if he would change his behaviour after knowing he was the crown prince. When he remained the same, part of him already enjoy that side of his future manservant, since most people were pretending whenever they faced royalty. With a violent slam, Merlin muted the memories again, but the fight was harder with all his wild emotions. Gaius was hurt. He had to find him.

He was no longer in the woods. He was in Ealdor and his mother, Hunith, was dying… no. No. Hunith was his granddaughter… wait… mother… or? He remembered the day she was born, and he thought it was funny to call her his grandchild. Was it because she had given birth to him in another life?

With full force, Merlin stumbled into a clearing and froze. There stood the sword, still in the stone, but what caught his eyes were the two people here. A woman waited with a wicked smile. She had a knife in her hand, one like those used in the old times. Tied to the stone was Gaius, his eyes wide with fear.

“Dad!”

“Be quiet, or I’ll kill you faster,” warned the woman. Gaius already had blood on his face, which made Merlin furious. “Now, Merlin. We meet again…”

“I… do I know you?” he asked, his voice shaking.

“Of course, you do. You tried to kill me, and failed, obviously,” she mocked. He heard her voice before… he knew it for sure.

“Merlin, stay back!” a man yelled, standing in front of him as a shield. The witch arrived, cloaked in black clothes and with a dark sword in hand. Everything from her posture to her glare asked for blood.

“Merlin? Can you please ask Gaius for more potion? My nightmares are back and I can’t seem to sleep.” The same lady asked, but with kindness and he felt like liking her. Calling her a friend.

“You have a choice to make, Emrys. Pull the sword, free you and us all… or watch your son die. I’m sure his blood won’t be enough to bring magic back, but it will satisfy me.”

“No, please! Please take me instead!” he begged, fear paralysing him on spot. A part of him wanted to run, grad the sword and do whatever the woman want but something else, the side who got hurt before what caused him to lose his memories fought against the mere idea. “I’ll do everything!”

Not happy with his answer, Morgana – how did he know her name? – lifted her arms, aiming for Gaius’s heart. Time slowed down at that moment. His body reacted on instinct. His left hand closed around the sword hilt, the one he fled for so long… he felt energy course in his arm and body. The blade slide like a knight in butter. Golden light erupted from the stone and his eyes burned with the same energy.

“Gaius, run!” he screamed, the ropes falling by a simple wave of his hand. He did not even watch; he knew his son always followed his orders. At all time, even when they were disagreeing on things. In front of him, of them, the old temple started returning to his former appearance. Huge doors appeared, made with heavy wood and stones from Avalon. “Morgana. I thought I warned you… don’t touch my family, ever again…” he was not Merlin anymore, for now, he was Emrys and his fury threatened to burn his enemy. “Magic is banned from these lands. I don’t care about the world. I don’t care about the people. I gave everything for a prophecy and it gave me nothing but pain. Now, just leave me to what’s left of my life or I will kill you. Understood?”

“And what about Arthur?” Morgana asked, tears rolling on her pale cheeks. “Please, I want to see my brother again, to do the right things.”

“Arthur is dead. It’s time to grow up and stop believing in fairy tales. The dead are not coming back… he won’t just rise from the lake,” Merlin whispered, his heart bleeding like it did thousands of years ago. “Farewell, Morgana.”

One last time, Merlin used his magic to transport both him, Gaius and the stone and swords to their house. He put a spell on his family, erasing all their memories of a trip or even a letter. He did the same thing to Morgana, to Mordred, to all the people involved in their story. The warlock just forgot one thing: he didn’t know Gaius had retrieved his memories from Camelot so he couldn’t erase them in the process. Deep in their house basement, in a room they never used, Merlin placed the stone and watch Excalibur. What if Morgana was right? What if Arthur had been on his way? No. She just played her usual trick… he decided and with a gasp, he put the sword back where it belonged, in the heart of all magic. He felt the void where his memories vanished again. He felt the pain in his heart. He felt like dying when he went to bed.

Oh Merlin… what have you done?

#whumptober2020 #no.9 #run #take me instead #ritual sacrifice #merlinbbc #fic #mention of murder tw #betrayal tw #sfw

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fight-surrender · 5 years

Text

Whumptober Day 23, 24: “Bleeding Out & Secret Injury”

Word count: 1610

Rating: T

Simon

“Fuck a nine toed troll!” I curse as I brush the furry grey creature off my shoulder and impale it with my sword. I tend to quote Penny when I do something stupid. Letting this creature get the drop on me was definitely stupid. Particularly given that it’s just taken a chunk out of my arm.

The animal is dangling from the tip of my sword, speared like a particularly gristly hors d’oeuvre. I bring it in for a closer look. It’s almost cute, vaguely guinea pig like, with grey fur tipped in black. Large purple eyes, green whiskers. Hell and horrors, it’s a polycythema vera.

Penny and Baz are going to kill me. Probably before this bite does.

They’re already angry that I took this job with the coven, rounding up invasive magickal species. Now I’ve gone and gotten myself bitten by one of the very species I was supposed to be hunting. This is just spectacular.

I flick the creature to the ground and stab it again for good measure.

Baz and Penny said they saw a vera in America, trying to get into Shep’s truck when we were escaping that rogue gang of freakish magical rejects in the dead zone. Somehow, one must have stowed away with us and now they’ve invaded England. Fortunately, the trolls rather think veras are delicious, so they keep the population in check. However, pockets tend to accumulate in the areas with fewer bridges. The Coven stepped in to help eradicate them and they asked me to help. I suppose that makes me a magickal pest control guy.

Veras aren’t particularly magickal. I think they can teleport for short distances, making them tricky to catch. They pack a nasty bite though. Their toxin does something to your spleen, making you bleed out internally, only your body keeps making more blood. So instead of passing out and dying like a normal person, you just sort of slowly fill up with blood til you like, explode or something. I haven’t really worked out the logistics.

Now I’ve been bitten.

I am not telling Penny and Baz.

Now that I’ve gotten my shit together (thank you new therapist) they have only recently stopped hovering over me. The last thing I need is them wringing their hands while I die a slow painful, possibly explosive death. I suppose I’ll say my goodbyes when things get bad and die alone in the woods, like a cat.

In the meantime, I imagine I should live my life to the fullest. Carpe diem and whatnot.

Baz:

Something is going on with Simon. He’s acting strange. Not necessarily in a bad way, it all just seems a bit…much. We’ve been out almost every day, a different activity. Yesterday, a leisurely tour of the British Museum, followed by curry and samosas in the park (he made me eat). He also made me return the books I stole all those years ago (I can’t believe he remembered that). Saturday was a visit to Ebb’s grave, deep in the wood. Last week we went to Paris, because he’s never been to France (he says the Watford sour cherry scones are still better than any French pastries).

It’s all been enjoyable; he’s been very attentive.

To me.

Loving, affectionate, present.

But it’s weird.

All of this significance. It feels a bit like a bucket list.

I’m trying to enjoy it, but I’ve been feeling off. Not myself. Like I can’t get warm and I can’t get full. I’m thirsty all the time, and nothing I do seems to be helping. I’ve eaten all the rats within a 20-kilometer radius and I’ve even resorted to buying blood from the local butchers. Nothing is helping.

I can’t get Lamb’s voice out of my head, telling me I was malnourished.

I refuse to follow that thought. I’m not—that.

But I’m also getting really tired. Like, exhausted. Like ‘it’s a struggle to get out of bed’ level tired.

I don’t know how much time I’ve got left.

Simon:

The poison is kicking in. I’m so tired.

Exhausted. Like, I feel as if my arms and legs were lead weights- tired. Dead dog tired.

I’m not sure how much time I’ve got left.

I don’t have to think about that right now because I’m actually in bed. With Baz, and there’s no place I’d rather be.

I’m the big spoon, because I’m always the big spoon. With my arm across his chest I pull him closer and hike my leg across his thigh. I carefully brush his hair away from his ear so I can murmur, “fancy a lie in?”

“Absolutely yes,” Baz croaks, voice thick with sleep. He intertwines his fingers with mine.

We both doze off.

Baz:

I wake before Simon. It’s an effort just to open my eyes.

I look at his arm, wrapped around my waist. His color is wrong, his once tawny skin is a vague mottled purple, how have I not noticed this?

Simon:

I open my eyes and look at Baz’s shoulder in front of me. He’s so pale he’s almost transparent. He’s thinner, I can see the bones poking through his skin. How have I not noticed this?

Baz rolls over and fixes me with his thundercloud eyes. “What the fuck is going on, Snow?”

“Er—what do you mean?” I’m stammering, this isn’t how I’d planned this to go.

“You’ve been dragging me through this virtual bucket list lately, you’re acting weird and now you’re purple!”

“It’s not a bucket list.” It is a bucket list.

“Answer the question.” Baz is using his “don’t fuck with me” voice.

Time to come clean then. I pick at an imaginary string on the duvet. “I may have been bitten by a vera.”

Baz’s eyebrows go down and he looks like he’s going to finish me off himself. “What? When? When the fuck were you going to tell me?”

My plan suddenly feels very stupid. “Well, I was going to tell you, when I felt… you know, closer to death.”

“Closer. To. Death?” Baz’s voice cracks. He looks extra murderous.

“Yeah, well, I didn’t want you to feel all sad and melancholy just because I was dying,” I reason.

Baz sighs and buries his head in my chest. “Simon, you splendid fucking moron.”

I think it might be safe to wrap my arms around his waist and pull him on top of me. I try it.

Baz raises his head and his fangs are popped. Not safe then. “Er—I’m not ready to die just yet, Baz.”

His hand goes to his mouth, I don’t think he realized his fangs were there. “Merlin, I’m a mess,” he says this giddily. “You’re a mess,” he’s laughing now. “We’re a mess squared,” he giggles, it’s a bit manic. He lays his head back on my chest.

I pat his back and smile awkwardly, I don’t laugh. I might blow.

Baz lifts his head again, wiping his eyes. “You see,” he stammers, “I have a problem.”

“OK…?” I offer.

He sits up a little, straddling me. He traces my scars with a long, pale finger. “I’m—starving.”

“Well, let’s order delivery then,” I grab his thighs to push him off so I can find my phone. He plants himself, hands to my chest and I can’t move. Vampire strength.

“No love, it’s not that,” he looks down, takes a breath then looks back at me. “I’m starving—of thirst. “The animal blood doesn’t seem to work anymore…” his voice trails off.

“Oh,” my mouth is hanging open, even though Baz has thoroughly trained me to close it.

“So here I am, the bloodthirsty vampire, dying of thirst,” he cracks up again, “with my half dragon boyfriend who is literally dying of excess blood.” He chortles and wipes his eyes again, “it’s like a goth Hallmark movie special. A match made in hell.”

He’s giggling, but he also looks a little sad.

“So,” I say, once he’s caught his breath. “Just so I have this straight,” I point at him, “you don’t have enough blood.” I point at myself, “and I’ve got too much of it?”

“Yes, that about sums it up,” Baz concedes.

Blimey, what are the odds?” I wonder.

“A million to one, I’d wager,” Baz sighs.

“Well, what are you waiting for, you barmy git? Come over here and bite me.”

“It’s not that simple, Snow.” Baz is frowning at me again.

“It bloody well is that simple, Baz,” I say feeling sparks of anger.

“What if I Turn you?” It’s almost a whisper.

“Shepherd said that most vampires don’t Turn people, and so what if you do? I’m going to die anyway if you don’t do anything. At least this way, you’ll get a good meal out of it, and we can figure out the rest later. We’ve been through worse.”

Baz pushes my hair off my forehead, “we have been through worse.”

I reach up and pull Baz back down on top of me. He settles on my chest. We’re nose to nose. I run my thumbs along his cheekbones. “Now come on and bite me. You look like shit you know.”

“Thank you, Snow. You’re looking rough and weedy yourself.”

I kiss him then, even though that’s probably not a good idea, given the blood lust.

“Are you ready?” I ask.

“No.”

“Will you do it anyway?”

“Yes.”

“I love you, Baz.”

“I love you too, Simon.”

I close my eyes, and then, in a rush of warmth and cedar and bergamot, Baz bites my neck.

#whumptober2019 #whumptober 2019 #whumptober day 23 #whumptober day 24 #carry on #wayward son #wayward son spoilers #sort of #not really #simon snow #baz pitch #pardon my grammar #pardon the typos #non beta'd

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sourcherrymagiks · 5 years

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Carry on Countdown 2019

Day 18 - Crack!

Lamplight

Ao3

Simon

He’s trying to avoid talking to me. That’s how it happens. There was kissing. Amazing kissing. Merlin and Morgana, he’s beautiful and when he kisses me back.....

But anyway. He’s also a stuck up twat who can avoid the shit out of anything. We were back in the room after the kissing (Great Snakes,that kiss though) and he was taking forever to hang his blazer up so he didn’t have to look at me or talk to me. What was I going to do but come up behind him and kiss his neck? I ask you, what else could I have done?

Which is how we came to stumble and fall into the wardrobe. And then straight out of the back. Into a drift of snow.

“Erm Baz, this is going to sound pretty stupid but I think we just fell into...”

“Narnia”

“Yes”

Baz

I know that this is somehow his fault. Why does he always have to involve me in his ridiculous heroics. Although, to be fair, this is well outside of his usual remit.

“Snow, might I suggest we go back? From memory Narnia has its own set of chosen ones. Lots of them. They can probably get by without you”

“I’m not sure that’s how this works, the path has gone”

I look around and he’s totally right. It’s just us, in the snow, under a lamppost.

I can’t keep the petulant tone out of my voice as I say “But you are our chosen one, you belong to the world of Mages”

He laughs and kisses me. “Didn’t know you cared you big softy” I briefly toy with the idea of snapping at him but instead I pull him back into another kiss.

When I pull away to catch my breath and try to get a hold over my treacherous body, Simon gets up. I grumble a bit under my breath but then I decide to co operate a bit. Grudgingly. It seems very unfair that we are here and not snogging in our room. Even though I was the one avoiding the snogging (Why?, I’m such an idiot)

Snow’s sketching in the snow with a stick. It looks like nonsense until I’m standing right next to him. Then it hits me at once, he’s drawn a map of Narnia. From memory.

I must be staring at him because he starts laughing.

“I know you think I’m a thick urchin who’s only ever read cereal packets but I’ve loved Narnia my whole life”

“Me too, that part is not quite right” I alter the shape of the western forest slightly so it ends further from the frozen lake. “I would definitely remember if you were the hero in it. I suppose you do have a bit of Peter about you”

“Fuck off Caspian” he throws a snowball at me. I throw one back. Then I kiss him again because this is all unbelievable.

He’s sketching plot points out now, trying to work out the timeline.

“Right you gorgeous villain, we need to get to the camp here in time for the battle. There’s enough footprints and sled tracks here to show they’ve all been through fairly recently. I don’t think we can help at any point up until the end, do you agree?”

“I do, excuse me while I try to absorb the shock of you being a reader.” He lightly punches me on the arm, he’s blushing. “Is your magic working?”

We both laugh

“As well as it ever does, yours?”

I take out my wand and cast ‘lights out’ at the lamp post. It blinks off.

“Cool. Let’s get moving. Keep your wand out. I don’t want to draw my sword until I need it and I, Erm, can I hold your hand please”

“Come here” I grab his hand and before I can stop myself I’ve kissed his knuckles.

“I like this, you,like this” he bumps my shoulder with his.

Simon

I’m really excited. I dunno if it’s the Baz thing or the Narnia thing but I’m so amped up I’m practically skipping.

“So, Caspian then?” Baz asks with his eyebrow up.

“It’s possible that I might have been not entirely straight for a while”

“You think?”

“There’s no need for that tone you wanker”

Then I’ve got him up against a tree. This want is everything. I need to touch him, kiss him, press myself against him.

He doesn’t just let me, he right there with me, pulling my hair, licking my neck, moaning into my mouth.

He pulls away gasping “Right Snow, let’s get back to the mission and stop debauching the pristine Narnian forests”

“But I like it, I like you” I’m whining a bit.

“You aren’t completely intolerable either Snow”

We seem to have been walking forever. I slept about ten minutes last night. I would kill for some Turkish delight.

“In the books it doesn’t seem this far”

I moan to Baz

“Heaven forbid that the made up world is larger than the children’s book made it appear”

“I get your point, even though you’re a twat, but its hardly made up is it?”

He shrugs. I’m rubbing off on him. That makes me smile. I nearly don’t hear the crack of the twig, I’ve disarmed the guard before I’ve had chance to worry about my sword or magic. They aren’t the best written soldiers.

“Take us to either Peter or Aslan please” I ask the battered looking Narnian as politely as I can be arsed to. I’m not great at manners when I’m hungry and tired.

Baz

Peter is beautiful, not a patch on Snow obviously, but still. The two of them together are blinding. Simon offers our assistance and Peter accepts a little unwillingly. I’m not sure he would at all if not for the wonderful Lucy. She never sees herself as the protagonist so she doesn’t have the same struggle as Peter. To be fair I wouldn’t want to share my story with Simon bloody Snow if I already had three siblings and a lion muscling in on the action. Poor fuck.

The two of them spend the afternoon practicing, Snow is better trained and in great shape but Peter is faster and lighter in his feet. It’s glorious.

When Simon fights Edmund it’s a different thing. No longer a master class in heroic swordplay fought by two golden leaders. Now it’s like a cunning bar fight. Simon has to stop himself from head butting Edmond. When he throws an elbow at Edmond’s face,then stops before it connects, Edmond is not so polite and punches Simon in his exposed ribs. It’s very feral.

When they’re done he comes over and presses his sweaty lips to mine. I don’t know how I avoid making a scene.

Obviously it’s still a bit of a scene. Uncomfortable coughs and averted eyes abound. Then simultaneously everyone decides to ignore it and peace is restored.

I leave to speak with Lucy. She’s got magic and I want to see if I can help her use it. It doesn’t work like ours though. She can’t harness it. I advise her to go to Watford as soon as she can when she returns home. She probably won’t.

She gives Simon a small banner embroidered with a dragon holding a blazing sun. He tucks it into his pocket because the courageous fuck won’t wear armour. He kisses her head. I’m completely flabbergasted when she gives me one emblazoned with a flaming moon. I must be allergic to it because my eyes are watering.

After dinner we talk tactics. Simon keeps quiet about upcoming plot points and focuses on the battle. Simon and Peter lean over the map, blond hair and copper curls tumbling together as the argue over every inch. From his plan I deduce that Snow’s aim is to kill the witch while keeping all the kids well out of the way. This goes down like a sack of shit with Peter. It’s his story and he is the king. Gorgeous (and capable) as Simon is he can’t lead this army. They aren’t loyal to him. Also he won’t play by their outdated battle rules, fight in a line and die, because he knows better. They finally agree on enough compromises to keep everyone happy and save lives. A lot of lives.

In spite of the protests I hold my ground. I will stay by his side regardless of what he thinks he’s going to order me to do.

It’s fun. Really. I mean there is an impending battle but, Crowley, I’ve read that battle so many times. It’s going to be brilliant. I catch Simon’s eye and I know he feels it too.

Simon

I can’t fucking sleep. This is going to be epic. I’m traipsing around the camp looking for anything to take my mind off the combination of wanting to get into this battle and wanting to do unspeakable things to Baz.

It’s not the time though, right?

We still haven’t talked. It’s possible we’ve managed to bring a fictional world to life to avoid talking. But I’m going to tell him after the battle. Hopefully it will be dead romantic.

Baz

The battle starts off early and badly, not quite as badly as I remember because Simon is genius at this and Peter listened to about a quarter of his suggestions. Plus there are two of them.

The absolute confidence of them helps keep up the morale that’s been damaged by Aslan fucking off.

Simon hadn’t mentioned that he was the bearer of a flaming sword or that he had a particularly impressive brand of violent, pulsing magic so when he calls his sword, the fear it causes slams the first wave right back.

I cast quickly and use so much magic that I’m nearly spent in moments but I have taken down most of the ogres and a couple of hags. Peter, Edmond and Simon smash through line after line of the White Witch’s army. Simon is actually grinning, the prat.

I wait for Simon’s signal to disarm the White Witch. Then he’s on her in a moment with Edmond and Peter. She never stands a chance.

By the time Aslan arrives back with the girls there’s only cleaning up and healing to do. He growls at Simon and Simon shrugs at him. He turns his back clearly as pissed off as a magical lion gets.

“This was not your battle Mage”

“Explain how it just was then wise one?”

Simon is brillant at one liners, when he’s not fighting me. I guess it’s in the job description. Aslan grunts and continues back to his tent. What a prick. I guess he’s not willing to let the homoerotic subtext turn into the story.

It’s very clear we’ve outstayed our welcome.

Simon

That was mega. But now it’s time to go. I don’t want to fuck with these guys and I also don’t want Aslan to eat me.

It’s a pretty shitty deal those kids have got anyway. Kings and queens in one land but not able to stay. We hug them goodbye. At least I live where I live. Except for right now obviously.

I grab Baz and we set off back to the lamppost.

“That was amazing, you were amazing” I say to him

He looks at me like he thinks I might he taking the piss.

“You did an ok job yourself Snow. You’re not as pretty as Peter though”

I’m glad he catches me when I jump on him. “Take that back Pitch”

“It’s an objective fact Snow, he is more dashing, I just prefer you”

“You do?”

“Yes you attention seeking numpty, I have appalling taste so I prefer you to most people”

“Good. Because, well, I’m, I think I might be, falling, you know, for you” Merlin. I doubt he’s even going to understand that.

Then he kisses me and I know he does.

Baz

I’ve been kissing Snow for hours. We don’t know how time works here relative to Watford so we should get back. But it’s complicated there and easy here under a lamppost in a forest full of spring.

It’s also not our story.

Simon still has his own story to finish.

“Ready Sweetheart?”

“Not really love”

“Shall we do it anyway?”

“After you”

#coc 2019 #carry on countdown #simon snow #baz pitch #snowbaz #narnia #gay narnia

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justlikeeddie · 5 years

Text

otp meme

List your Top 5 Canon and Top 5 Non-Canon OTPs. Then, tag 10 people to spread the love, and so on and so on…

I was tagged by @rcmclachlan! It’s fun to excavate your fandom history!

This is a GOOD QUESTION in that, y’know. What is a canon OTP? (What is a pairing? What is canon? What is ‘is’?) The answer, for this post, is “whatever made it easiest for me to split these into two sets of five”.

CANON OTPs

Aziraphale/Crowley, Good Omens

This is canon. “Fight me”? No need. Fight Michael Sheen.

Do say: “And when I’m off in the stars, I won’t even think about you!”

Don’t say: Hey, have you thought recently about the fact that Crowley’s snakeskin shoes might actually just be his feet?

Look at an art: A little ancient Grecian collusion by @seraph5

Read a fic: nothing but the wild rain by @singlecrow

Have I written it? In a desperate exercise in exorcism immediately after watching the show, yes: Going Native and Riding in Cars With Demons. And I have about five WIPs in charliekellypepesilvia.jpg frantically plotted notes stages. Watch this space. (For some time. I’m a bizarrely slow writer.)

Flint/Thomas, Black Sails

Do say: “People can say what they like about you, but you're a good man. More people should say that. And someone should be willing to defend it."

Don’t say: I was enjoying the show so much that I ignored the fact they made captain flint gay but to wrap up the series on the notion he would put his sword down to pick daisies with his male lover is just too much to bear. I miss the 90’s

Look at an art: Journey into the Dark by @riisinaakka-draws

Read a fic: Unaccommodated Man by @septembriseur

Have I written it? Yes, although astonishingly, I only ever finished one fic: Some Affair.

Strange/Arabella, Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell

Do say: “The excitement of it was very much to see how you would look at me. The excitement of life was very much to see how you would look at me.”

Don’t say: HE WAS A MUCH WORSE HUSBAND IN THE BOOK AND HE LET HER DIE AS A TREE (I know. I know)

Look at an art: Padua by @cobbledstories

Have I written it? Not as a foreground pairing, although I do have a very detailed Strange/Arabella/Grant fic that lives eternally in my head in the hope it will one day fit a Yuletide request.

Morse/Joan, Endeavour

Do say: “You mean the world to them. You mean the world…” [trailing off in tears]

Don’t say: You do realise he’d make her miserable and she deserves better? (I KNOW)

Cry at a simple gifset: :′′(

Have I written it? No, happy to let the show itself continue to take anything that Morse might hold dear and crush it into the dirt, no need for me to help.

Jake/Amy, Brooklyn 99

Truly the opposite to Morse/Joan in every possible way, aside from the involvement of law enforcement personnel

Do say: “There’s a typo in this crossword puzzle.”

Don’t say: …Title of your sex tape. (Or anything about Season 6, which I haven’t seen yet.)

Look at an art: Jake & Amy by @ivy6am

Have I written it? No, because Brooklyn 99 is an example of that rare and complete joy, Show That Textually Contains Literally Everything I Want From It And Then Some.

NON-CANON OTPs

Sam/Gene, Life on Mars

My “formative” tag on Tumblr is probably overused, but, like. Extremely. Formative. Truly the ur-fandom in terms of my future trope and fic interests. God bless you, weird mid-00s genre experiment broadcast at a particularly impressionable point in my teens.

Do say: Gene Hunt constructs intricate rituals that allow him to touch the skin of other men.

Don’t say: The ending of Ashes to Ashes is canon.

Watch a vid: There Is Too Much Light In This Bar by AbsoluteDestiny

Read a fic: Tangible/Intangible by @lozenger8

Have I written it? I went back to this fandom for Bent for Yuletide a few years ago, but everything else was written when I was literally 17, so caveat lector.

Merlin/Arthur, Merlin

Genuinely wondered whether I should have included this in the canon list. Two sides of the same coin? Merlin's mum desperately trying to get them together about halfway through the first series? “I was born to serve you, Arthur”? As ever, in thinking about this, I’ve just made myself furious again that this objectively fucking stupid children’s TV show remains one of the most emotionally and erotically resonant pieces of media I’ve had the misfortune to consume.

Do say: “I could take you apart with one blow.”

Don’t say: “I could take you apart with less than that.” (It’s been nearly eleven years since this exchange aired on children’s TV and I’m still reeling)

Watch a vid: Alone by sisabet

Read a fic: Past Imperfect by @thehoyden

Have I written it? Yes, although, again, I was a teenager and didn’t really know how to words: Cross You Off My List. I also have a passionately-planned and half-written epic about the ten years of their evolving relationship from boys 2 men (not the band), and its delicate balance between private interaction and public performance, which I thought I was finally going to finish for the ten-year anniversary of the show last year, but at this rate, might be done in time for the twentieth.

Fraser/Kowalski, due South

Do say: “Partnership is like a marriage, son.”

Don’t say: Anything that will wake the Vecchio anon.

Watch a vid: Goody Two Shoes by @laurashapiro-noreally and pipsqueak

Read a fic: Kowalski is Bleeding by @cesperanza

Have I written it? Weirdly way less of it than makes sense for the amount of time that this was my primary fandom, but yes, published some time after the fact: Homecoming and Poles.

Strange/Grant, Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell

Surprise double-entry for JSMN! Except not at all a surprise, because I am into so many aspects of this book and show that I could probably have filled most of the ten entries with JSMN rarepairs. (Please, talk to me about the criminally underexplored sexy class politics of Strange/Childermass.) But anyway, Strange/Grant was, somewhat to my surprise, my takeaway pairing from the TV adaptation.

Do say: “There are any number of magical things my friend could do to prove it,” while looking like you’re about to combust from how excited you are by the prospect.

Don’t say: HE WENT TO VENICE IN A PUDDLE WITH NO GOODBYE (I know)

Look at an art: Major Grant by erebusodora (technically only one half of the pairing, but it’s just a very nice painting)

Read a fic: Wilderness by @the-omnishambles, ie The First Strange/Grant Fic On The Internet

Have I written it? Yes, went a bit mad in 2015. A peculiarity of the Iberian Peninsula (long, slightly sad); An England that is dead (shorter, sadder); and Sound and Vision (no redeeming features).

Charles/Erik, X-Men

Again… IS THIS CANON. Explain any single thing that happens in any of the X-Men timelines if this pairing isn’t at LEAST unconsummated canon

Do say: “I couldn’t disobey you even if I wanted to.”

Don’t say: Sorry, what exactly was the plot of X-Men: Apocalypse?

Look at an art: A sketch by loobeeinthesky (the watch!!!)

Read a fic: Wisteria by by @columbinepurples

Have I written it? Yes: The Width of a Circle.

In turn, but only if you’re bored and like making a list as much as I do, tags for:

@confusinglyamusingly

@butteronmyroll

@johnnyvod

@the-omnishambles

@sixohsixoheightfourtwo

@cribins

@septembriseur

@itsmapes

@deputychairman

@drawsaurus

(You don’t… have to go into as much detail as this… I think you’re just supposed to say who the pairings are, but listen I’m staying with my parents this week and I have a LOT of tumblr downtime)

#fic #fanart #memes #good omens #black sails #jonathan strange and mr norrell #endeavour #brooklyn nine nine #life on mars #merlin #due south #xmens

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elizabethemerald · 5 years

Note

kill me for the drabble thing it's three am and angst time (if you're awake)

Hey I hope you’re still in the mood for some angst!

If you want to send me a character and a Prompt I’ll write a drabble!

Trollmarket roared with noise as the battle raged. Jim hid behind a large piece of rubble. He stuck his head out from behind his cover for a second and could see Toby across the marketplace rolling into cover, just ahead of a sparkling beam of light. He only just managed to duck back down before a similar magical attack blew a piece off his cover, right where his head had been.

In the center of Trollmarket, the nexus of.the magical energy floated Claire. Or to be more accurate Morgana possessing Claire’s body. Jim flicked his long ears towards a distant sound, his keen nose tracking a certain smell. There! He unconsciously growled past his tusks. While his half troll form was often more bane than boon it did have some small advantages.

“Now Aaarrrgghh!” He shouted. A boulder the size of a Buick was hurled across the battle field towards Claire, no, Clairgana. Jim was already running full sprint across the battlefield. Clairgana blasted the boulder out of the sky with a hail of magical orbs. Another hail targeted the spot where the boulder had been thrown from, several of them exploded, creating a rain of rubble.

Jim hoped Aaarrrgghh had gotten out of the way in time but Jim had little time to worry about his friend as a similar attack came his way. He was able to dodge most of them. One that he had no avenue to escape from turned sharply to the side before it struck him. He had made it to his next cover before Morgana could levy another blast. He heard her scream of rage come from Claire’s mouth.

There hidden by the rubble was the wizard. Merlin had certainly gotten the worst of his exchange with Morgana. He lay unconscious in a heap, but at least he was alive. Jim thought back to their journey here as he checked the wizard.

Claire had been having nightmares since the Eternal Night. Several times a week she would wake in a cold sweat or wake screaming. Jim was never far to comfort her when she woke, but still they persisted. Claire feared Morgana’s presence, feared she would take control again. But Merlin insisted again and again that he would be able to sense Morgana’s power. He called her nightmares simple proof that women had no place on the battlefield. He called it simple hysteria. He had probably never heard of PTSD, Jim thought. That’s what he had assumed it was.

Jim did everything he could for her and gradually the nightmares slowed. He thought she was getting better. When they were in Kansas she had the idea to take a detour to gyre station, then Jim could pick up the stone for his armor that would allow him to walk in daylight. The rest of the trolls hid in Kansas, while Blinky, Claire, Merlin and Jim went back to Arcadia. They of course texted Toby and Aaarrrgghh to meet them in Trollmarket.

At first they couldn’t find the stones. Blinky wasn’t sure where Vendel had hidden them. Claire was sure he had returned them to a vault chamber under Trollmarket. In the chamber she picked up a strange crystal. Merlin snapped at her telling her not to pick up things she didn’t understand. He tried to snatch it out of her hands.

The moment he touched it Morgana activates the stone. It sapped his strength, stealing almost all of his magic. The wizard had no chance. He was powerless against not one but two powerful sorceresses, both of whom hated him. The blast knocked him through the roof of the chamber into the rest of Trollmarket.

He would live, Jim thought, but not if Morgana found him. Fortunately Toby was keeping her busy. He had clearly been training during the intervening months, and unlike the sword of Daylight, Morgana had no immunity to Toby’s warhammer.

Any time she tried to take to the air he would hurtle towards her hammer first, so she was keeping the fight on the ground. With a little distance Jim could see that Toby had another advantage. Some of Morgana’s attacks seemed to come off weaker. Some went wide of their mark. Some turned in mid air to avoid Toby. Claire must be fighting Morgana’s control!

Jim ran forward his shield on his arm. “Claire! Claire! You have to fight her! You can retake control!”

“Claire is gone you stupid boy! Only I remain.”

Jim ignored her. He focused on continuing to distract her. She was using a lot of her magic to dodge and block his and Toby’s attacks. “Claire you beat her before, and you’re stronger now! You can beat her again!”

Toby started to cheer Claire on as well while he fought. “Come on Claire! Show this old witch who’s boss!”

Clairgana screamed in rage again and attacked with a new fury. Yet still none of her attacks hurt the two boys. Her attacks missed again and again, even direct hits glanced off their armor harmlessly.

Toby was mid swing when she suddenly dropped to the ground. He was barely able to avoid hitting her. Claire looked up at them, tears leaking from her brown eyes.

“Jim? Toby?” They were already hugging her, holding her tight.

“Claire! I knew you could do it,” Jim said, while kissing away her tears.

“You sure showed that old hag!” Toby said.

Claire’s face contorted in pain, her eyes took on a golden light for a second then returned to brown.

“She’s still here!” she gasped in fear. “You’re never going to be safe as long I’m here! Jim you have to kill me!”

“I’m not going to do that! I love you Claire and I know you can beat her!” he held her close, then kissed her. Their kiss stretched long in their passion. Then Toby saw Claire’s face contort again.

The explosion bowled Toby over sending him rolling backwards. Aaarrrgghh caught him before he rolled off the edge of Trollmarket. Jim was right at the epicenter. He went soaring up and back. His body landed near the entrance to the Hero’s Forge with a sickening thud. Toby turned to Aaarrrgghh and Blinky who ran up.

“We have to push her back into the Forge! We know that area better than anyone. And Claire’s connected to that place, if she can take control anywhere it will have to be there.”

The two trolls nodded. Clairgana rose into the air laughing. She started to float toward where Jim had fallen. The explosions of two Dwärkstones at her feet knocked her off balance.

Toby, Aaarrrgghh, and Blinky pushed her back again and again with their onslaught. Exploding stones, hurled boulders and hammer blows all drove her back. When they reached Jim, Blinky helped the Trollhunter to his feet. Jim helped as best he could, but he was badly hurt. An errant stone hit the mechanism that turned on the obstacles of the Forge.

Clairgana was struggling. The four of them were hitting her with everything they had, on top of that Claire was fighting her every spell. Before long she collapsed again.

Jim rushed to her but a purple bubble surrounded Claire. “Jim, Toby you have to kill me. I can’t let you closer unless you’re going to kill me. I can only hold her for so long you have to kill me. Please.”

Jim stood there, leaning heavily on Blinky. “We’re not going to kill you. We will find a way to stop her!”

She turned sad eyes to Toby, but he shook his head. “Claire I love you almost as much as Jim does. As long as you keep fighting we won’t stop fighting with you.”

She looked tired, frail, laying on the ground of the Forge, all the gears and blades still spinning. “I have been fighting her since I opened that portal. I can’t fight her anymore.”

Her face contorted again. This time she bent over double like she had severe cramps. Jim pressed himself against her bubble trying to get closer to her. When she straightened sweat was beading on her forehead, she grimaced in pain. She looked around at the rising and lowering platforms of the Forge, and stood.

“I love you all so much. Toby, Aaarrrgghh you were the best friends a girl could ever have.” her bubble kept the others more than an arms length away, as she walked near the center of the arena.

“Claire, what are you doing?” Jim’s voice echoed with worry.

“Blinky you were the best teacher I could ask for.”

Everyone stayed as close as her spell would allow them, following her across the floor of the Forge. As she walked she doubled over in pain again, her breathing fast and hard.

“Say goodbye to my family for me. I love them so much.”

“Claire! Please stop!” Jim cried. “I love you!”

She looked at him, she stood with her arms out wide.

“I love you too, Jim Lake Junior. Goodbye.” Golden light flowed out of her eyes. Her face twisted into Morgana’s haughty smirk. More golden light pooled at her fingertips as Claire’s bubble disappeared. Time seemed to stand still. Then Morgana’s triumphant laugh was cut short as one of the blades of the Forge sprang from the floor and sprouted from her chest.

Aaarrrgghh went and turned off the Forge traps. They had done their work. Jim held his girlfriend’s body as he wailed his grief. Toby and Blinky held him. Aaarrrgghh returned and held them all in his embrace.

The moment that they all wished would never end, lest they have to face the reality of what had happened, came to a close at the ringing steps of Merlin entering the Forge. Jim laid Claire down and rose to his feet, tears still pouring from his eyes.

“So she’s dead?” Merlin said after a glance at the body. The other stared at him. “At least now we don’t have to worry about Claire opening any more doorways for Morgana to escape.”

“What did you say?” Jim growled. Toby glanced at him, past his own tears, he had never heard his friend like that.

“Morgana was almost freed, again, because of her. Claire-” Jim moved faster than any of them could even see. He moved faster than thought, every inch of his Armor glowing. He grabbed the wizard by the neck and lifted him one handed without any visible effort.

“If you ever mention her name again,” Jim roared. “I’ll tear your throat out!”

The Trollhunter dropped the wizard to the side. Then Jim knelt, picked up Claire’s body and began to walk away. The others followed him out of the Forge. Merlin was left behind, gasping for air and bleeding from where Jim’s claws and dug into his skin.

#tales of arcadia #trollhunters #jim lake junior #claire nunez #clairegana #possessed!claire #toby domzalski #angst #trollhunters angst #my writing #emerald's drabble #writing emerald

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seawolvesanddragons · 5 years

Text

Merlin Swan Princess AU

Ok, Merlin Swan Princess AU. So, in this AU Uther died instead of Ygraine when Arthur was very young (YAY) and Balinor, as a powerful Dragonlord, is one of Ygraine's closest supporters, and she becomes close with Hunith. About a two years after Arthur is born, Hunith dies in childbirth) and Merlin is born. Balinor is very upset, obviously, but does love his son. However, he and Ygraine are both concerned about the current political climate - Camelot is seen as weak because of its Queen Regent and two year old heir, and Ygraine fears that enemies will fall upon them or go after Arthur, or that Arthur will inherit a dying kingdom. Meanwhile, dragons and dragonlords are getting a bad rep in other kingdoms b/c kings mistrust their power and dragons are scary, and Balinor fears his kind will be hunted. So Ygraine and Balinor come up with a beneficial deal - they will help each other out. They dismiss the idea of them getting married b/c Ygraine still loves Uther and Balinor Hunith but Balinor pledges his support, his clan's support, and Kilgharrah's support to Camelot. In return, Ygraine declares Camelot a safe haven for dragonlords, druids, etc. To keep this arrangement fresh in the minds of the people/other kingdoms, Balinor decides that every summer, he and Merlin will stay in Camelot. If he had to travel on business, than Merlin would still stay with Gaius.

The deal is great - it gives Ygraine some extra security, and Balinor is pleased that Merlin will have some semblance of a permanent home and a maternal figure at least 4 months of the year. Plus, they both privately hope that if the boys become friends, then the truce will continue. Well, private to each other. They stress to Arthur and Merlin that they really SHOULD get along, for the good of the kingdom/the dragonlord clan, etc. Except, well...Arthur and Merlin? Do NOT get along. Seriously. While Merlin adores Gaius and likes Ygraine and ok Camelot can be pretty cool, he still dreads the summers when he is forced to try and get along with Arthur, who only cares about knights and sword training and riding horses. Merlin doesn't get the big deal about riding horses, he can ride dragons and that is MUCH more exciting. Arthur, meanwhile, is frustrated that this kid (yes, Mother, KID, he is only 5 and I am SEVEN. I am old enough to be a page!) is his responsibility to entertain, especially when Ygraine lets on that it is so Arthur can have the support of the dragonlords in the future and yeah, Balinor is cool and all but Arthur is going to be the King of Camelot, what kind of King can't defend his own people. (Plus there's a jealousy thing b/c Arthur doesn't have a dad and Merlin doesn't have a mom but they are both too emotionally young to really understand that.) So they spend their summers trying to avoid each other, Arthur with the knights and Merlin by learning with Gaius and practicing magic. Morgana, when she arrives, splits her time between the two of them, but she always gives a little extra time to Merlin (she sees Arthur ALL YEAR) and Merlin makes Gwen less uncomfortable, so that also tips the scales. Arthur dislikes this because Morgana is HIS friend. When they both turn out to be magic, well, that's even more annoying. As they get older, more issues are cropping up among dragonlords and Balinor leaves Merlin in Camelot alone during the summer more and more, which Merlin does NOT like. And okay, they probably share and adventure or two, but they do NOT like each other at all, not friends, ok, so shut up Leon. And Gwen. And Morgana. Then one summer when Arthur is 17 and Merlin is 15 and Merlin wishes Arthur luck before a tourney and Arthur sees Merlin practicing magic for a few peasant children who came to Camelot during the famine and distracting them from their hunger, and okay, maybe they other isn't so bad. And they are both old enough to sit in on the Council meetings now and do so regularly, and find themselves working together to solve a crisis or something. So they are not friends - they snipe and everything at each other, but things are at least slightly more cordial to each other. So the end of the summer comes, and Balinor returns on Kilgharrah (who always is giving Arthur strange looks, no one understands it) in time to literally spend one day and then pick up Merlin. He and Ygraine watch the boys barely interact at the farewell feast and Arthur doesn't say goodbye to the next morning, he is already at training so the two sigh and give up on those two ever actually being friends, and Balinor mentions that they will be back next summer, but Merlin is also going to start accompanying him when he leaves to smooth things over. Unbeknownst to them Arthur is lurking behind the palace wall, trying to decide whether it would be awkward or not to say goodbye again, and doesn't know how he feels about that and boom then they are gone. And everything returns to normal in Camelot for about a day. Then Morgana wakes up SCREAMING from a nightmare and Arthur, as the only one who can calm her down besides Gwen, is trying to help when she gets out enough to say that Merlin and Balinor are in danger and woah who knew Arthur could run that fast? And within a half hour, Arthur, Leon, Elyan, Lancelot and Percival are out searching for the Dragonlord, the Dragon, and his son. Its past daybreak when they finally see Kilgharrah flying away in the distance, no riders, crying mournfully. They go to where they saw him take off of and find a dying Balinor. Merlin is nowhere to be seen. Balinor lives just long enough to tell Arthur "the beast..it has Merlin. It’s not what you expect." and then in true unhelpfully vague dying plot device fashion, dies. For a month, Camelot and the dragonclan search, Arthur and his knights leading the fray. But as time passes, and Kilgharrah fails to return, and Morgana sees nothing, they all assume Merlin is also dead. Except Arthur. Arthur is convinced that Merlin is still alive, that he is counting on their rescue. He goes to Gaius, who admits that it would be hard to kill a warlock of Merlin's abilities, but also hard to hold him captive. He goes to Morgana, who says yeah maybe something is blocking her Sight, something is off, but Arthur have you eaten anything today you need to slow down. And Leon and the Knights find themselves suddenly training WAY more than usual, and patrols increased and still going on search parties, which ok they are fine with, they liked Merlin, Lancelot was especially close, but let’s be realistic here. But Arthur refuses, because Merlin is a kind and decent kid and he swore to Balinor he would find him. Merlin, meanwhile, is being held captive by the Sidhe, who want Merlin to use his dragonlord/magic powers to help them conquer all of Albion, including Camelot and the dragonclans and the druids. Merlin said "hell no" , refused to summon any dragons and great,the sidhe have crazy powerful magic and now Merlin is cursed to be an actual merlin, like, the bird, during the day (Alvar thinks he's SOOO funny) and only be human at night, and they used some ancient Sidhe dark magic chain to keep his magic bound. At least he has Gwaine, the captured knight errant whose blood the Sidhe keep using for their "noble blood needed rituals" and Mordred, a druid changeling who is SO not up for this Sidhe nonsense but is also 10 and scared to leave on his own, to keep him company. A whole year passes. Arthur is supposed to become king soon but is ignoring the coronation preparations because he has to find Merlin. Finally, FINALLY Kilgharrah answers Arthur's persistent call to COME HELP YOU GIANT LIZARD and gives him MORE vague instructions on Merlin and how to help. When Arthur is king he is outlawing vague statements. So Arthur and Leon go on a "hunting" trip where Arthur sees a merlin. Like, a really magnificent merlin. Leon is about to strike it down when Arthur is like wait MAYBE THIS IS THE SIGN KILGARRAH MEANT and follows the bird, Leon wandering behind him wondering wtf is going on. They follow the bird for fucking miles. Until they reach a really pretty looking lake with a convenient rowboat to get to the island in the middle and Arthur uses it and good lords above, the BIRD JUST TURNED INTO MERLIN. Arthur, who has spent a year trying to find Merlin, suddenly isn't sure what to do (do they hug? They never hugged before but Arthur really really REALLY wants to hug him right now) and Merlin doesn't know why Arthur has crossed his mind so much in the past year (its because its too painful to think about his father, and Kilgharrah, and Camelot was some of the best times of his life, and Arthur was undeniably part of Camelot. That’s all right? No other reasons...) but now they are both kinda awkward around each other. Leon is still recovering from the whole bird thing. So, Leon thinks, ok, found him, didn't even need to fight beast, weird that he was a bird but we can go now right? But Arthur feels this was too easy, and yep, now Merlin is talking about a curse, and this fellow Gwaine (...why does Arthur suddenly feel jealous) is backing it up, and now there's a ten year old staring at them while hiding behind a tree, and essentially Merlin is cursed and can't leave the island unless in bird form and according to Mordred the only way to break a Sidhe curse is with something so powerful and true even magic can't withstand it. "A Great Sacrifice" he calls it. Helpful kid, really. Arthur is determined to not leave without Merlin but now it is daylight and the Sidhe are coming and Arthur go NOW and Leon is dragging him off when a wild burst of magic transports them both to the other side of the lake right as the Sidhe arrive and Merlin is let wondering "wait was that my magic? Since when can I do that again? " The Sidhe aren't stupid, and figure out what is going on, and are going to go after Arthur when Merlin tells them to wait. Tells them he's changed his mind, he'll call Kilgharrah and give them use of his dragon and his warlock blood willingly but they can't go after Arthur. The Sidhe agree, and it is decided the ritual will take place at midnight. Gwaine and Mordred are NOT okay with this plan and Gwaine decides he has to escape to get Arthur to help. He is caught in doing so though and Mordred has to summon up his courage to escape and find Arthur. He gets to Camelot and after finding Arthur and being overwhelmed by all the people (Arthur's coronation is the next day) he tells Arthur what Merlin has done. Arthur leaves, essentially blowing off his coronation, with the help of Morgana and Gwen, who he leaves Mordred with. He also tells Morgana that if anything happens, he knows she will take care of Camelot. Arthur is halfway through the forest on horse when Kilgharrah shows up, asking Arthur why suddenly the future was going dark, and hey, apparently Arthur has a freaking DESTINY to unite Albion. Arthur would really like to be kept in the damn loop on these things. So Kilgharrah takes Arthur to the island, Gwaine helps him fight their way to the ritual, and they get there right before Merlin is about to call Kilgharrah already and be ritualistically sacrificed. So Arthur offers himself in Merlin's place. Blood of the once and future king, tempting right? Conceived of magic and the blood of kings and destiny running through his brain, that's way better than anything else. (somewhere above them, Kilgharrah is muttering "this is NOT why I told you about your destiny you idiotic prince"). Merlin is shouting that he can't DO that he has a kingdom to run, he had Camelot and his mother and Morgana and Arthur just responds that Morgana and Ygraine can take care of Camelot, but he made a promise to Merlin that he would save him and that was what he as going to do, because his life is not worth anything if he can't save Merlin. The Sidhe are like, fine, whatever, blood of kings lets go, and prepare to ritual sacrifice. Arthur lies on the table, prepares to die, and ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE. Turns out, that whole "true sacrifice thing" needed to break the curse? Apparently, Arthur giving up his kingdom and his life to save the one he loved fits the bill. Merlin's magic is back. And Merlin? yeah, he's PISSED. There are not many Sidhe who escape his wrath alive, and those that do return straight to Avalon. Merlin, Gwaine, and Arthur return to Camelot on Kilgarrah, missing Arthur's coronation by hours, but hey, they can just reschedule it tonight right? (Ygraine is not amused but is also so happy at seeing Merlin she can't really be angry. Morgana is delighted as well, and when she sees how Arthur keeps looking over at him, whispers to him smugly "I saw this in my dreams, you know.") So Arthur is crowned King, and Merlin is right there to witness it, and the first thing Arthur does is knight Gwaine. Later, Merlin and Arthur escape the festivities to a balcony for some quiet, where Merlin pledges Arthur the loyalty of his dragonclan, but Arthur says he doesn't need any armies or dragonclans, as long as Merlin stays by his side. (Kilgharrah, Morgana, Gwen, and the knights all groan loudly from where they are hiding and eavesdropping.) Arthur and Merlin then go off to unite Albion and everything is happily ever after!

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winglesscrows · 6 years

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a drop of truth

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Merlin (BBC) I G I Merlin & Arthur I 5k

Arthur has a truth serum, Merlin lies more than he tells the truth. Who else would Arthur use it on?

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A single drop of the water-like potion will make the victim tell the truth. The effects will last an hour, and once the victim slept, they would remember nothing as they woke. Arthur had come into possession of such a potion, but knew not how to use it or, rather, who to use it on. The vial which held the potion contained roughly ten drops, and while Arthur could think of many uses this potion may have, he felt honor bound to never use it. Who was he to force the truth from an enemy, and what friend would lie to him? He contemplated gifting it to his father, but decided against it in fear that he would abuse its powers. Morgana likely kept many secrets that his father benefited from being ignorant of. So Arthur kept the vial for himself, letting no one know he possessed it, waiting for an opportunity to arise.

When Merlin became his manservant, Arthur thought of using it on him to ask why he was here, and why he was the way he was, but the boy seemed honest and straightforward, so Arthur saw no use for it. Until he did. Merlin drank poison for him. He didn't say how he knew – refused even – and was rather adamant about drinking the poison in Arthur's stead, being the only one in the room believing that it would kill him. He almost died for him, but would tell no one how he had acquired the information. Merlin was not an enemy, but he wasn't quite a friend either. Arthur didn't feel guilty about wanting to force the truth from his servant.

Two weeks later, Arthur put a single drop of the truth potion into Merlin's water-skin as they were out hunting and watched as Merlin drank it without being any the wiser.

Arthur waited awhile, not knowing how long it would take for the potion to take effect. After five minutes he asked a question to test its effects.

“Why were you late this morning?”

“I overslept,” Merlin answered, not sticking to the lie about helping Gaius with some herbs, which he had told that morning, as he had stumbled into his chambers with breakfast. The potion was working and Merlin would remember nothing of the next hour when he woke up in the morning.

“Why did you drink the poison?” Arthur asked casually.

“To save you,” Merlin answered without hesitation. Arthur thought that perhaps that was one of the effects. The victims would answer immediately with the truth. Of course, saying the truth didn't necessarily give Arthur the answers he actually wanted, because Merlin had answered the question truthfully, but remained as elusive as ever.

“Do you know who was responsible for poisoning the chalice?” He tried instead, hoping it would get him closer to getting some answers.

“No.” Interesting.

“Who told you that it was laced with poison?” Arthur pressed, remembering that Merlin had said that someone had seen it being done.

“A servant girl from Mercia, but I think Gaius suspects that she was in disguise,” Merlin said, finally giving a good answer. Arthur nodded as he thought of his next question with the new information in mind.

“Why would she tell you? It could have been her doing.”

“Perhaps,” Merlin agreed. Even with the truth potion in effect, it didn't really stop them from having a real conversation, it only meant that Arthur could be certain that Merlin wasn't lying to him – not that that was normally a concern, “Maybe she wanted Bayard to drink it? He did offer.”

Arthur was silent for a moment. Merlin knew less than he had hoped (he didn't even know what he had hoped would come from this conversation), but the potion was still in effect, so he should take advantage of that.

“What do you think of me?” Arthur asked then, a little smirk on his lips as he eyed Merlin. He saw Merlin smiled before he answered.

“Arrogant,” he said, almost laughed, “A prat, but not as much as I first thought.”

Okay, so Merlin didn't like him that much. Arthur kind of knew that already. But that begged the question.

“Then why did you save me?”

“It is my destiny.”

Arthur asked no questions after that.

In the following year, there were many instances where Arthur thought of using the truth potion on Merlin, but Arthur waited, keeping a list of things he would like to ask him. The truth about Sophia (he was certain that Merlin could not have knocked him out with a lump of wood and done it so forcefully that Arthur literally forgot about it), how his father had slain the wraith of his uncle (Merlin might not have been directly involved, but Gaius probably knew, so maybe Merlin knew as well) and Merlin had tried to tell him something back in Ealdor, which had begun to bug Arthur.

But then came the Question Beast, its bite a fatal one, which Arthur miraculously survived. Arthur had to use it. He didn't even know if Merlin had been involved, but he needed answers and Merlin was the only one whom he could use the potion on without him finding out. And it wasn't that he hadn't thought of just asking Merlin without the help of a truth potion, he had, but in the past year he had learned a couple of things about his strange manservant. Most importantly he had learned that Merlin rarely lied, but that he kept secrets. Merlin was very good at serving Arthur half-truths, or changing the subject when there was something he didn't want to talk about. He could lie, and despite what he had claimed, Merlin could lie quite well too, but Arthur also knew that Merlin didn't like to lie. At his core, he was an honest person, and Arthur believed that Merlin had a reason for keeping secrets.

But Arthur needed the truth about this. Anything Merlin had to offer, he needed.

“How did I survive?” He asked, still bedridden with Merlin tending to him.

“I made a deal,” Merlin merely spoke, and Arthur wasn't quite following.

“What kind of deal?”

“A life for a life.” So magic.

“Whose life did you bargain?” Arthur asked, already knowing the answer.

“Mine.”

“That's why you said goodbye.”

“Yes.”

Arthur bit his lip before he continued. Getting answers had been easier than he had anticipated, since Merlin was the reason he was alive, but he was starting to regret having this knowledge.

“Why are still alive then?” Arthur asked sadly, “Will I lose you?”

“Nimueh didn't honor the deal,” Merlin explained, “She tried to take my mother's life instead. Magic was angry with her and took her life instead.” Merlin spoke as if magic was entity, as if it was a person. It puzzled Arthur, but then again, what did Arthur know of magic? Even studying it was outlawed.

“So you won't die?”

“No.”

“Why didn't you tell me?”

“I didn't want you to blame yourself for my death,” Merlin answered sincerely.

Arthur bit his lip, another question on his tongue, “What do you think of me?”

Merlin smiled, perhaps happy to change the topic, “Arrogant,” He said again, “A prat, but not as much as I first thought. You are also stupidly brave.”

Arthur smiled at the addition, and repeated another question: “Why did you save me?”

“Because you are my king.”

Arthur didn't question it. He didn't think he would like the answer.

Arthur felt like a bad friend for continuing to use the truth potion, but it seemed to be the only way to make Merlin tell him a whole truth. After Morgause, Arthur wasn't seeking information, but rather an opinion that he knew Merlin wouldn't give him without being forced to.

“Do you think she told the truth?” Arthur asked. It had been a day since he had attacked his father, and Merlin had stopped him by saying Morgause had been lying. Only after Arthur had calmed down had it crossed his mind that Merlin could have been lying to make him stop, knowing he wouldn't listen to anything else. It had also occurred to him that his father had never actually denied Arthur's accusations.

“Yes,” Merlin said, confirming Arthur's suspicions.

“Do you know if she said the truth?”

“No, not for certain.”

“Why did you tell me she lied, if you believed it to be true?”

“You were going to kill your father. I had to stop you.” Merlin talked as if he is a knight on a mission. Perhaps he was. How many times had he saved Arthur now? He truly didn't know the answer.

“Don't you think he deserves it?” Arthur asked sharply. His anger at his father resurfacing, but no longer thinking of striking him down with a sword. He thought that it was Merlin's calming presence that was keeping him grounded. Keeping him from making a mistake.

“Perhaps,” Merlin said slowly, something akin to hatred bubbling to the surface, before it was calmed and he looked kindly at Arthur, “But you don't.”

Arthur didn't think too much about the answer, too focused on Merlin's kind eyes. He asked a familiar question instead.

“What do you think of me?”

Merlin didn't smile as he answered this time: “Arrogant.” He said for the third time, “Stupidly brave and just. You don't always listen when you should.” Arthur noted how Merlin no longer thought he was a prat. He still called him that though, so maybe it just wasn't important. Or perhaps the nickname had merely turned endearing now that they were friends.

“Why do you stay?” Arthur asked this time. Merlin could have left so many times. Arthur sometimes thought he would. Every time Merlin told him a truth he didn't believe. Every time Arthur's anger got unjustly turned on his servant, merely because he was close by. Every time Arthur gave him extra chores because he made one small mistake. Every time Merlin had almost died.

“You are my king and my friend. I would never leave.”

Arthur hoped that would remain true. He had gotten too used to Merlin's presence to want to be rid of it. He found it hard to imagine a future where Merlin wasn't by his side, supporting him through trying times and cheering him up with stupid jokes.

Friends shouldn't force each other to do things they wouldn't want to do, but Arthur justified slipping another drop of the potion into Merlin's drink with the belief that friends shouldn't lie to each other anyway. And Arthur knew that Merlin must have lied. How could he have killed a dragon and not remembered? It didn't make much sense.

“How did I kill the dragon?” He asked a couple of nights after it had happened... or not happened. Whatever it was.

“You didn't,” Merlin answered, quite as expected, but Arthur was still disappointed. It would have looked good on the list of his accomplishments. Arthur Pendragon, the dragon-slayer. Or maybe not. The dragon was his family crest. Maybe he should kill them.

“Who did?” Arthur asked, because the attacks had stopped, so someone must have killed the dragon. Was it Merlin? Arthur knew his manservant was capable of more than he let on, but he doubted that he had the ability to slay dragons.

“No one,” Merlin answered, and Arthur took a deep breath. Great. The dragon was still alive (or at least Merlin believed it to be).

“It lives?” Arthur asked, just to be safe.

“Yes.”

“Why did it stop attacking?”

“I commanded it to stop,” Merlin answered casually, Arthur having to do a double take on that. If it wasn't for the truth potion, he would have thought Merlin was joking.

“How could you do that?”

“I am the last dragonlord.” The statement was spoken with pride. Arthur would have been proud too.

“Then why did we search for Balinor?”

“He was my father. When he died, I inherited his gifts.”

Arthur swallowed the information like he would one of Gaius' nasty potions. A truth he didn't want to know. A truth Merlin hadn't wanted him to know. A truth he should know. A truth Merlin shouldn't have carried alone. A truth which Merlin would carry alone as soon as morning came.

“I'm sorry,” Arthur said, at a loss for words, feeling bad for how he looked down on Merlin for crying over Balinor's death.

“Don't be,” Merlin said as if he was comforting him.

“Would you ever tell me about your powers?” Arthur asked, almost dreading the answer.

“No.”

“Do you trust me?”

“With my life.”

“But not with the truth?”

“No.”

Arthur sighed. One day he would ask Merlin for the truth and he would give it to him. No truth potion needed.

“What do you think of me?” Arthur asked again. It hadn't been long since he had asked last, but a lot of things had happened. Perhaps Arthur had changed. Perhaps Merlin thought differently of him once again.

“Arrogant,” he repeated. Arthur thought Merlin would always think that of him, “Stupidly brave and just. You are kind-hearted. Sometimes, I think you are too kind.”

“Why do you stay?” he asked again.

“You are my king and my friend. I would never leave.”

“Uther is your king,” Arthur corrected, but Merlin looked him in the eyes, and spoke without hesitation.

“Uther is no king of mine.”

Arthur didn't use the potion for another two years. There were many reasons for that. He felt guilty for making his friend tell him a secret that could get him killed should the wrong people find out (Arthur decided to ignore the fact that those wrong people were mainly his father). Being a dragonlord was simply considered too close to having magic in Camelot – hence why there were no dragonlords left. They had all been killed, except for Balinor, who had been forced out of the kingdom, and even when beyond the border, he had been hunted again, forced to leave his pregnant lover behind. All because of the king's madness.

And now that Uther believed that the dragons were no more, he would not hesitate to kill Merlin. Merlin who was good and kind and under Arthur's care and protection. Arthur trusted Merlin with his life and he wouldn't betray that trust. If he did, he could never earn Merlin's truth. And that was the other reason why he didn't use the potion. He wanted Merlin to tell him his secrets on his own terms. Arthur couldn't keep forcing his hand, especially when his servant was none the wiser.

But then Morgana betrayed them and Merlin acted like he had known it would happen all along. Arthur didn't have time to find out the truth until after they have taken back Camelot, and that ordeal had brought its own bag of questions. One drop of the potion reminded Arthur that Merlin's truth must be treasured, yet he did not hold back with the questions.

“Did you know about Morgana?” Arthur asked immediately, but Merlin merely smirked.

“Be specific,” he teased, still trying to cheer Arthur up despite being under the influence of a powerful potion.

“Her betrayal,” Arthur clarified, and Merlin bit his lip.

“Yes.”

“Why didn't you say anything?” Arthur asked through gritted teeth. Only his faith in Merlin held him back from doing something he would later regret.

“You wouldn't have believed me,” Merlin answered sadly, and Arthur hated that it was the truth.

“How long have you known?”

“Since we found her,” Merlin said, the truth clearly upsetting him. They had been friends too.

“How did you find out?”

“I followed her as she met with Morgause and she tried to kill me.”

That surprised Arthur. Morgana had tried to kill him, yet Arthur had never noticed. He felt a pang of guilt knowing that Merlin had likely been hurt and Arthur would have only made it worse by complaining about Merlin not doing his job properly.

“How did you survive?” Arthur asked instead of asking something that would make him feel worse about how he had treated him in the past.

“I am dragonlord,” Merlin confessed, unaware that Arthur already knew of his powers (Arthur was surprised that Merlin didn't make much of a deal of it being revealed), “I called Kilgharrah for help,” Arthur assumed that Kilgharrah was the name of the Great Dragon, and that Merlin was using his name to cover up from the fact that he wasn't dead as best he could under the influence of the potion. Arthur wondered if Merlin had figured out that he had been drugged.

“Did you ever try to stop her?” Arthur asked, not knowing if there had been anything to stop, but Morgana being Morgana, there likely would have been many times where she would have schemed something.

“Yes. I almost killed her,” Merlin confessed again, and shun away from Arthur, ashamed of the truth. Merlin was no murderer.

“Explain,” Arthur demanded. He needed to hear this story. Merlin was unlikely to give it to him willingly no matter the circumstance.

“I was shown a vision of her killing the king. I tried to prevent it, but she fell down the stairs as I tried to stop her.”

Arthur didn't question the bit about visions, and continued with Morgana.

“How did she survive?”

“I asked Kilgharrah to help heal her,” Arthur nodded as he began to see a pattern of the dragon healing people. Arthur had no idea dragons could do that.

“If you knew she would betray us, why did you save her?” Arthur asked puzzled. He would have let her die, he was certain.

“Because you would have been hurt,” Merlin said sincerely and looked at Arthur for the first time since the topic of Morgana's almost death had begun. He looked at Arthur so kindly that the prince couldn't understand what he had ever done to be looked at like that. He changed the topic.

“What did you and Lancelot do when you took off by yourselves?”

“We went for the cup of life,” Merlin explained, and Arthur presumed that that had made a lot of sense. But the cup would have been well-guarded by immortal soldiers. Not even Lancelot would have been good enough to get past all of them.

“How did you get past an immortal army?”

“I used Excalibur,” Merlin said, as if Arthur had any idea what that was.

“What is Excalibur?”

“A sword forged in a dragon's breath with the power to slay the dead,” Merlin said, his eyes marveling, “A sword forged for you.” The fact that Merlin had probably made it went unsaid.

“Then why don't I wield it?”

“You will,” Merlin smiled, “When you are ready.”

Arthur nodded slowly, and asked his last two questions.

“What do you think of me?”

“Arrogant,” Merlin laughed, “Stupidly brave and just. You are kind. The kindest person I know.”

“Why do you stay?”

“You are my friend and I love you. I would never leave.”

Another year went by without Arthur using the potion, but then Lancelot died. Arthur felt guilty. Guinevere felt guilty. Merlin felt guilt. Arthur's hand shook as he put a drop in Merlin's drink.

“Why do you feel guilty?” Arthur asked, his voice sad. It had only been a couple of hours since Lancelot's funeral.

“It should have been me.”

“Why you?” Arthur asked. He didn't want to lose Merlin. He couldn't lose him. He wanted him to know that, but under the effect of the potion, the words would be empty. He wouldn't remember them.

“It is my destiny- no, I- I didn't want to lose you. I didn't want to lose him. I didn't want to lose anyone. It should have been me,” Merlin rambled, clearly not having sorted out his own emotions or truths. Merlin was in pain. Arthur wanted to know why he was suffering so much.

“Was Lancelot special to you?”

“Yes,” Merlin answered, holding back tears.

“Why?”

“He knew my secret,” Merlin's hands trembled. Arthur didn't know what secret he was referring to, but he was slightly hurt that Lancelot had known something Arthur either didn't know, or Merlin didn't know that he knew. Because Merlin had never told him, but somehow Lancelot knew. Arthur knew he was a possessive person, but it shouldn't have been right to ask for the secret merely out of jealousy. But Arthur did anyway.

“What secret?”

“I have magic.”

As soon as the words were out, Merlin slapped his hand over his mouth and took a few steps backwards, away from his prince – his king as he had claimed. His eyes remained locked on Arthur's shocked face, and he breathed heavily, tears forming in his eyes and spilling over, running down his cheeks and over his hand still keeping his mouth closed. Arthur couldn't move. He had thought that Merlin being a dragonlord was overwhelming, but this? He didn't know what to do with this knowledge.

Merlin's eyes tore away from Arthur, and found the goblet still on the table. His eyes went wide with realization as it dawned on him what Arthur had done – must have done for Merlin to so unwillingly spill his secret. He lowered his hand, trying to speak, but nothing came out at first, until he slowly whispered his name.

“Arthur...” Merlin sounded hurt, in disbelief and Arthur expected him to be angry with him, disappointed in him for using such methods against someone he claimed was his friend, “I'm sorry,” Merlin said and Arthur was shocked anew. This wasn't what Merlin was supposed to do, “I'm so sorry,” he repeated, the disbelief being replaced with fear. “I'm sorry. You couldn't trust me to be truthful so you... I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you.”

“Merlin,” Arthur tried, wanting his servant to stop apologizing, but he didn't know what else to say. He tried to take a step towards him, but Merlin backed away from him, frightened, scared, scared of the man he called his king and friend. The man he had claimed to love.

“And now you know,” Merlin continued, “I'm sorry, Arthur, I'll- I'll do whatever you want. I'm sorry. You weren't supposed to find out like this.”

Merlin slid to the floor, still crying and mumbling his apologies, while Arthur was still frozen in place.

“If-” Merlin sobbed, struggling to speak against the tears, “If I meant anything to you, could you- could you grant me one favor?”

Arthur wanted to say 'yes, anything', but the words got stuck in his throat. He didn't know what to do. He wanted Merlin to stop crying. Stop apologizing. Stop acting like Arthur would suddenly hate him when Merlin was the best person he knew. He wanted everything to stop. He wished he had never asked.

“I don't want to burn,” Merlin sobbed, his hands shaking as hugged himself, the thought of fire being too much for him, “Will you kill me?”

Arthur felt like he could throw up as he heard the request. The plea for a painless death. A death Merlin expected, and accepted so easily that Arthur hadn't been able to keep up. Arthur didn't know what to say, but he slowly leaned down to embrace his crying servant. Once in his arms, he could feel just how much Merlin was shaking, but Arthur couldn't find the words of comfort he knew should be uttered. He returned to something familiar, holding his friend close, trying to convey that he would never hurt him.

“What do you think of me?”

“You are kind and brave and just,” Merlin sobbed, and Arthur wanted to say that that wasn't true. If he was kind and just, his crying friend wouldn't think that he would kill him, “You are the strongest person I know.”

Arthur wanted to shake his head. He wasn't strong at all.

“Will you leave?” Arthur asked. Merlin might not remember, but Arthur needed to know that Merlin at least had the sense to protect himself.

“I would rather burn.”

Arthur shed tears as he knocked Merlin out, holding his now unconscious manservant in his arms as he wept over the reality of this man, who had nothing but undying loyalty for a king he believed wanted him dead. He didn't deserve it.

The next morning, Arthur was woken by a bright and smiling Merlin who had no idea of what had aspired the night before. As Merlin smiled at him, going through his plans for the day, a frightening thought entered Arthur's head. For all his apologies, Merlin never once asked Arthur for forgiveness.

After the revelation of Merlin's magic, Arthur realized something about his servant. Something he should have realized long ago. Everything that Merlin did, he did for Arthur. Okay, so perhaps that bit was obvious, and Arthur had kind of known that for a while, but that wasn't exactly what Arthur had noticed. No, what he had noticed was that Merlin would often let Arthur come before what was right. He should have figured it out with Morgause. Merlin had lied to keep Arthur from killing his father, and while that had technically been the right thing to do, Merlin had put the blame on magic.

He should have figured it out with Morgana. Merlin had saved her life despite knowing that she was the enemy, all because Arthur was hurting. Arthur suspected that Merlin would gladly lay ruin to a kingdom if it would make Arthur happy for a week.

So when his father died, Arthur needed Merlin to be honest with him rather than trying to soothe his grief. Because in his grief, he had called magic evil and Merlin hadn't stopped him. In his grief, he had blamed the old man – whom he strongly suspected of being Merlin in disguise – for his father's death and Merlin had said nothing. Arthur needed council. Honest council.

“Is magic evil?”

“It is neither good nor evil. It merely is,” Merlin answered, honestly, wisely.

“Did magic kill my father?”

“Yes,” Merlin said, saddened.

“Whose magic?” Arthur hoped that Merlin wouldn't say his own.

“Morgana's, I suspect,” he said instead, Arthur being thrown for a loop.

“How is it her doing?”

“There was an amulet,” Merlin explained, “It reversed the effects of the healing, killing him instead. We didn't notice it in time,” Merlin looked full of regret. Of course he did. If it had worked, Merlin would have believed that he could open Arthur's mind about magic. Instead, it seemed to have resulted in the opposite.

“So you tried your best to save him?” Arthur asked, trying to kill two birds with one stone.

“Yes, I-” Merlin's eyes widened, “How did you figure it out?” Shock and fear formed on his servant's face as he backed away from Arthur slowly.

“It's you eyes,” Arthur explained, “I would recognize them anywhere.”

“I'm sorry, Arthur,” Merlin cried, “I tried, I-”

“It's okay,” Arthur interrupted, and hugged him. He didn't want Merlin to be as scared as last time. This time he was prepared. This time he would react better. Be a better friend.

“Will you send me away?” Merlin asked frightened. Arthur knew that Merlin feared banishment more than death.

“No,” Arthur said and shook his head.

“Kill me?” Merlin trembled, his voice growing small.

“Never,” Arthur reassured, pulling Merlin in closer.

“I betrayed you,” Merlin sobbed, “Lied to you. Failed you.”

“You didn't fail me,” Arthur said, you never could, he didn't add, “You didn't betray me.”

“I'm sorry.”

“What do you think of me?”

“You are the best person I know,” Merlin said and hugged Arthur firmly, afraid of Arthur letting go.

“Would you ever leave?”

“I'd rather you burn me.”

Arthur held back tears as he realized that once again, Merlin never asked for forgiveness.

As king, Arthur always held a trial when someone committed a crime. Arthur stop the persecution of the druids. Arthur never burned a single person. Arthur saved magic users who had never caused any harm, and Arthur tried to clean up the mess his father had left him. Slowly, he rebuild his kingdom, hoping the land he had created was fairer than before.

Lifting the ban on magic was no easy task. Personally, he had a lot to overcome and, legally, his father had made the law hard to change. It was a slow process.

Two years after his father's death, Arthur faced the disir. They gave him a choice. It wouldn't be hard for to choose, yet he still asked for Merlin's advice, wanting to know what his wise servant had to say on the matter. Curious as to how Merlin would convince him to lift the ban.

“Magic has no place in Camelot,” Merlin said and Arthur was shocked. He wanted to ask him why he was lying about something as important and momentous as this, but he didn't. He waited until he had given him the potion.

“Why don't you want me to legalize magic?”

“I do.”

“Then why did you tell me not to?”

“I want Mordred dead,” Merlin's voice was cold as he spoke. Arthur didn't know what Mordred had done to deserve Merlin's hatred. Merlin hardly hated anybody.

“Why?”

“He is destined to kill you. Destiny has not been wrong yet,” Merlin's voice was still cold. He didn't look at Arthur as he spoke.

“Is he loyal to me?”

“For now.”

“If he has done nothing wrong, you shouldn't condemn him,” Arthur said, in disbelief that Merlin would do all of this just to ensure Mordred's death.

“I just want you to live,” Merlin said, his voice desperate and pained.

“You would choose me over magic? Over your own freedom?” Arthur asked slowly, the reality of Merlin's choice hitting him hard.

“Always,” Merlin spoke, his voice strong with loyalty and determination.

“It isn't right,” Arthur pleaded, and Merlin looked down, in shame.

“I'm not as good as you.” Arthur wanted to say that it wasn't true, but he could feel an argument coming. He closed the conversation.

“What do you think of me?”

“You are the best person I know. The kindest, the bravest and the fairest. I wish I was more like you.”

“Will you follow me?”

“Through hell and back.”

All Arthur asked of the disir was time to change the law.

The ban was lifted after a year, but Merlin didn't tell him about his magic. Arthur had just one drop of the potion left, and he was determined to use it. He invited Merlin into his chambers, made him sit down at the table, while Arthur remained standing, leaning over his chair, looking at Merlin.

“Do you know what this is?” He asked his servant, holding up the vial and his servant shook his head.

“It is a truth serum,” he explained and Merlin looked scared for a moment, “Whoever drinks it will tell the truth for one hour and will not remember anything after sleep.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Merlin asked slowly, and Arthur moved away from the table. He took two goblets from the cupboard and poured water in both. He gave Merlin one and put the rest of the serum in his own.

“Why...?” Merlin wondered out loud, but Arthur interrupted him.

“Now you know that I won't lie, and you can tell me anything you want, since I won't remember anything in the morning anyway,” Arthur drank it all before Merlin could interfere.

“I know about your magic and I don't blame you for hiding it from me,” Arthur said as soon as the potion entered his system. Merlin let his jaw drop, before composing himself and asking a question.

“How you do know?”

“You told me.”

The puzzle pieces fell in place slowly, before Merlin asked his next question.

“You've used it on me before?”

“Yes.”

“How many times?”

“Nine times.”

Merlin nodded slowly, coming to terms with what Arthur was telling him.

“When did I tell you about my magic?”

“After Lancelot died.”

“Why aren't you angry with me?” Merlin asked, almost frustrated, perhaps angry with himself on Arthur's behalf, “I lied to you. I lied to you, and you knew it.”

“You were scared,” Arthur said quietly, “You thought I was going to kill you.”

“What else did I tell you?”

“You are a dragonlord. The Great Dragon lives. You knew of Morgana's betrayal long before she revealed herself. You tried to save my father despite hating him. Destiny dictates that Mordred will kill me. Those are the biggest truths you have told me.”

Merlin shook his head in disbelief, “And you still kept me after all that,” he mumbled to himself, before turning his attention back to Arthur, “How could you know I was loyal to you? Did you ask?”

“I didn't have to.”

“Why?” Merlin breathed, more frustrated with the situation than Arthur had anticipated. Did he want to be punished so badly?

“You wanted to die for me. You said you would stay and follow me through hell. You said you loved me.”

Merlin snorted at the last part: “Truth-serum me must be very mushy.”

Arthur smiled: “I quite liked it.”

“Probably because you knew I wouldn't remember.”

“Probably,” Arthur agreed, he had never really thought about it.

“You don't believe Mordred will kill you?”

“No.” Arthur said simply, “You shouldn't listen to destiny.”

“Who then?” Merlin challenged.

“How about your king?” Arthur suggested cheekily and Merlin laughed.

“Sounds good.”

There was a moment of silence, Merlin smiling to himself, before he asked another question. A question that made Arthur laugh before answering.

“What do you think of me?”

“You are incredibly loyal. Braver than any knight and wiser than any scholar. You are the best person I know.”

“Would you ever make me leave?”

“Never. You are my friend and I love you.”

“Sappy,” Merlin commented, “Did you get that from me?”

“Yes,” Arthur confessed, “It is the truth though.”

“It is.”

#bbc merlin #merlin #arthur pendragon #a drop of truth #long post #fic

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dumbledoresaidcalmly · 7 years

Text

The Last Enemy - James x Lily Fanfiction

Can be found at https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12637484/1/The-Last-Enemy

Chapter 1 It was September 1st and sunlight streamed through the windows lining the ceiling of Platform 9 ¾. Lily Evans peered at her watch for the millionth time that minute. Knowing the following was inevitable, she gave another pleading look to her sister. Petunia Evans was glaring daggers at the people around her until she shifted her eyes to land on her sister’s. Knowing it was her final chance to patch things up, Lily spoke.

“Tuney,” she began with her childhood nickname, “I’m sorry. So unbelievably sorry! It was just an accident, I’m sure, and I would never let anything like that happen to you if I had known! I–”

Petunia scoffed. “It’s not about that! You stand there, thinking you’re so special going to school to learn and have magic while being around other people just like you!”

Lily paused at her sister’s words. She thought this was about the incident with Snape. But maybe it was something else, she couldn’t tell.

“…I’m sorry, Tuney, I’m sorry! Listen–” Lily grabbed Petunia’s inching away hand to better make a connection with her. “Maybe, once I’m there, I’ll be able to go to Professor Dumbledore and persuade him to change his mind!”

Petunia struggled to wrench her hand out of Lily’s grip. “I don’t–want–to–go!” she exclaimed. “You think I want to go to some stupid castle and learn to be a–a–you think I want to be a–a freak?” she finally spit out.

Lily felt her heart breaking; if she wasn’t close to tears before, she certainly was now. Petunia finally tugged her hand free. Lily was finally alone. “I’m not a freak. That’s a horrible thing to say,” she muttered.

“That’s where you’re going,” Petunia continued with relish, “A special school for freaks. You and that Snape boy… weirdos, that’s what the two of you are. It’s good you’re being separated from normal people. It’s for our safety.”

As Lily’s heart stung more with the cruel words, she looked for her parents. They were both standing a ways away, blissfully unaware of the two of them while they drank in the sights of the exciting wizarding community. She turned back to Petunia, gaining a new strength to defend herself and not be denounced by her sister.

“You didn’t think it was such a freak’s school when you wrote to the Headmaster and begged him to take you.” Lily retorted. Petunia’s face reddened.

“Beg? I didn’t beg!” she sputtered.

“I saw his reply. It was very kind.”

“You shouldn’t have read–That was was my private–how could you–?”

A memory flashed in Lily’s mind. She and Snape going into her room one day and finding a Hogwarts letter on her nightstand. They read it as an investigation. Knowing Snape was a few feet away, Lily glanced at her shared secret keeper as a force of habit. Petunia gasped.

“That boy found it! You and that boy have been sneaking in my room!”

“No, not sneaking! Severus saw that envelope, and he couldn’t believe a Muggle could have contacted Hogwarts, that’s all! He says there must be wizards working undercover in the postal service who take care of–”

“Apparently wizards poke their noses in everywhere!” Petunia exclaimed, her red face replaced to one of pale terror, “Freak!” she finally spat before fleeing to the familiarity of her parents. Lily stood for a moment, trying to gain control of her tears. ‘Put on a brave face’, she thought, ‘Just get on the train.’

Lily said goodbye to her parents as they sent her off with words of love and absolute pride for her. Petunia stayed away. The wizard conductor gave the final call for boarding and Lily wasted no time stepping onto the train, desperately needing a compartment to herself for a while.

Locating an empty car near the end of the train, she hastily entered and shut the door. Taking the seat nearest to the window, Lily rested her forehead against the cool glass overlooking the packed platform littered with wizard parents, and screeching owls. This is when she finally let her tears fall freely. Why didn’t Petunia love her anymore? She probably was a freak. Maybe she was making up her magic ability. It probably wasn’t real.

Outside the compartment, a group of first year boys blocked the door, shouting and talking excitedly about magic. Lily hated them for no reason. There was a sudden lurch as the train sprung to life. Lily brushed her tears away as the car door opened and someone from the cluster in the corridor poked his head in. A boy with a mess of dark black hair on his head and grey eyes met Lily’s green ones.

“Hey, mind if we join you?” he asked. Before Lily could respond, the door was opened further, letting three more first years join the boy in taking their seats. Lily found this kind of rude but brushed those thoughts aside, as she would have said yes to him anyway.

The grey eyed boy stuck his hand out for Lily to shake. “I’m Sirius by the way,” he said confidently. Lily took Sirius’ hand.

“I’m Lily. Pleased to meet you.” By now, the other boys had their attention on Lily.

The boy with a slimmer face and brown hair stuck his hand up in an awkward wave. “I’m Remus,” he greeted.

The boy with a messier head of hair than Sirius flamboyantly stretched across the compartment, extending his hand for Lily to shake. “James Potter,” he exclaimed.

Shaking James’ hand Lily looked to the last boy to introduce himself, who had mousy brown hair and was the shortest of the four.

“I’m Peter. Hello,” he mumbled sheepishly.

James took his hand away abruptly and started ruffling in his school trunk for something. The air was then draped in an unpleasant silence and Lily turned her head to again be leaning against the window. Remus, Peter and Sirius started discussing Quidditch teams which Lily listened halfheartedly, having heard of this briefly from Snape in one of their hang outs.

Sirius watched as James rummaged from his trunk. He gasped suddenly at something tucked just out of sight. “What are these?!” he gasped as he lunged for the stack of cards. James looked up to see what had been discovered. He smiled superiorly. “That’s only my collection of Chocolate Frog cards. I’ve gathered them for years and that’s not going to stop now that I’ve got school,” Sirius leafed through them excitedly. “There’s rare ones in there so don’t mess any of them up,” James warned. The onlooking Peter choked on air as he studied the deck.

“Morgana Le Fey and Herpo the Foul?! How’d you get these?” Peter asked.

“I got talent,” James bragged.

“Stole them off some bloke, more like it,” Sirius stared in disbelief.

“And, look,” James grabbed a second deck from in his trunk. “Mint condition Merlin.” James had become a god… In the vaguest of senses. Remus had disappeared some time ago behind a copy of ‘How Not To Blow Off Your Fingers On The First Day’ by Julius Gummidge.

The compartment door opened and a cheerful old woman peered in with a welcome, “Anything from the trolley, dears?”

“One chocolate cauldron, please,” Peter asked politely, handing over the sickles to pay.

Sirius fished out a few sickles and knuts and handed them to the lady. “Licorice wand and pumpkin pasties please,” he ordered curtly.

Remus and James both paid for Chocolate Frogs and Bertie Bott’s Every Flavored Beans. When the trolley lady looked to Lily if she wanted anything, she politely refused with a shake of her head. After the compartment door was closed again, comfortable silence started as the boys ate their sweets. These were only fueling the sugar high that soon took over all of them. Sirius and James ended up in a wrestling match, one which Sirius was winning but James wasn’t having any of that. Remus disappeared back into his book and Peter chowed down on his cauldron cake and watched James and Sirius be entertaining. Lily stayed with her face towards the window, keeping out of unwanted attention for the moment.

Watching the sunny countryside pass, Petunia crept back into focus in Lily’s mind. Her sister hated her. There was nothing she could do to change that, no matter what. It was hopeless. Lily faintly heard footsteps stop suddenly outside the compartment. The door swept open and closed and Severus Snape took his seat directly across from her. Glancing at him, she could only imagine what the obvious tear streaks on her face looked like to him.

“I don’t want to talk to you,” Lily said in a constricted tone.

“Why not?” was all he could ask.

Speaking to Severus made Lily delve back to her problems she wanted to ignore above all others. She took a shuddery breath, “Tuney h–hates me. Because we saw that letter from Dumbledore.”

“So what?” Severus asked in such genuine nonchalant that made Lily angry. She glared at him.

“So she’s my sister!” she snapped at him. Lily wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand, careful to not give telltale signs of crying from the other people in the carriage with them. Severus said something else, but Lily didn’t want to hear any defense from him.

“But we’re going!” Severus pointed out to her. “This is it! We’re off to Hogwarts!” his excitement was impossible to ignore and it got an optimistic look from Lily despite her awful mood. Severus saw that slight change and relaxed, glad to be free of the tension between them. “You’d better be in Slytherin,” he added with a new confidence in him.

When that comment reached the ears of the others in the compartment, the James boy swiveled around to give it full attention. “Who wants to be in Slytherin? I think I’d leave, wouldn’t you?” he asked the question to Sirius across from him.

“My whole family have been in Slytherin,” Sirius replied with no smile reaching his face.

“Blimey, and I thought you seemed all right!”

“Maybe I’ll break the tradition,” Sirius smiled at the idea. “Where are you heading, if you’ve got the choice?”

James answered by raising an invisible sword heroically in victory. “‘Gryffindor, where dwell the brave at heart!’ Like my dad.”

Severus scoffed slightly which made James turn on him. “Got a problem with that?” he demanded.

“No,” he answered with a noticeable sneer that said otherwise, “If you’d rather be brawny than brainy-”

“Where’re you hoping to go, seeing as you’re neither?” Sirius slyly asked.

James let out a howl of laughter which was the cue for Lily to leave the compartment with Severus. She stood up and glared at James and Sirius who were laughing with the other two of their entourage. “Come on, Severus, let’s find another compartment.” she said hotly.

“Oooooooooo…” James and Sirius drawled in high voices, imitating Lily. James stuck out his leg to trip Severus on his way out. Before the compartment could close, Peter suddenly called out, “See ya, Snivellus!” with an air of confidence.

Lily slammed the doors shut on the boys and laughter erupted from inside.

“So. Where’s your seat?” she asked Severus.

“Just follow me.”

The two ended up in a carriage with a couple of Ravenclaws. After idle small talk, Lily and Severus sat comfortably in each other’s company. The train ride from that point was pleasant as the thought of the terrible group of boys was pushed away as the excitement of the new year flooded the mind.

When Lily changed into her school robes, it was dark outside and Hogwarts could be seen faintly in the distance. The Hogwarts Express was rushing over grassy fields freshly dewed from mid-day showers so it sparkled extravagantly in the moonlight, replacing Lily’s nervousness with pure astonishment. The train came to a stop and Severus and Lily stepped onto the stoney path ahead of them hand in hand as they looked at the massive figure calling out, “Firs’ years! Firs’ years follow me!” holding a large lantern the size of a large owl cage.

The giant man led all the new students down a narrow downhill path that led to the edge of an enormous lake. From there, the Hogwarts castle was in full view and everyone marveled at it. Perched on a mountain on the opposite side of the lake, the glinting lights from within shining like stars, the castle seemed like a dream.

“Only four in a boat!” instructed the towering man.

Lily and Severus got in one of the boats followed by two other girls. The train group Lily met before all filed loudly in a boat thankfully a ways away from theirs. Once everyone was filed into boats, they pushed off from the shore onto the mirror still water. No one spoke except for the obvious few.

“Excuse me, sir! But, what do people call you? And why are we following you blindly?” James asked bluntly.

The giant man looked mildly surprised at this question, as if no first year ever had the courage to ask someone so intimidating anything. His eyes twinkled with the opportunity to meet someone truly interested. “The name’s Rubeus Hagrid, Keeper of Keys and Grounds at Hogwarts. Yeh can all call me Hagrid. An’ I’m in charge of gettn’ all yeh firs’ years to the castle fer sortin’!” he introduced. There was silence once more.

“So, if you’re the groundskeeper, you tend to the lake as well?” James asked again.

“Tha’s right.”

“Is it true there’s a giant squid living down there?”

“Ah… yes.”

“When was the last time it ate a student?”

“Never, I don’ think”

“Perfect. A new feat,” James beamed optimistically. With a jolt, he faked lunged at Peter, causing him to panic and lurch the boat to be dangerously close to capsizing. Neighboring boats burst out laughing, making the tension melt away as the students passed under a huge cliff, through a curtain of ivy, and through a dark tunnel that led to an underground harbor right underneath the castle.

Everyone clamoured up a pebbled path that led to huge oak doors. They were finally here. Lily squeaked with excitement. When Hagrid went up to the castle doors and knocked three times, they opened immediately to reveal a tall, slender, dark haired witch deemed in robes of a dull scarlet that matched her pointed hat. The few murmuring students fell silent since this witch was hardly one to be messed with.

“Hagrid,” the witch addressed. “I commend you for your punctuality, but there is no need to arrive so close to the wire.”

“Terribly sorry, Professor McGonagall, it won’ happen again.”

“Thank you very much. I’ll take them from here.”

With a sweeping hand, Professor McGonagall ushered everyone into a high ceilinged entrance hall that was a spectacle all in itself. There was faint chattering coming from a tall doorway on the right of the hall and another surge of excitement and anxiousness flew up and down Lily’s spine; the feeling continued while entering a small, cramped room. The Professor appeared at the head of the crowd.

“Welcome to Hogwarts. The start of term banquet will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is-” Lily internally sighed at the introduction, having heard the gist of the speech from Severus over the summer when asking the countless questions about the wizarding world. Still, she kept steady eye contact, fearing that any actions committed might ruin her chances of entering the school.

“-the Sorting Ceremony will take place in front of the school in a few minutes. I suggest you all compose yourselves beforehand,” McGonagall made her way towards the door. “I shall come back when we’re ready for you. Please wait quietly.” And she left.

Lily rocked back and forth, looking up at the ceiling, smoothed out her robes, trying to steel herself for the ceremony.

“Are you nervous?” Severus whispered beside her.

“A bit, yeah,” she swallowed. Her heart was beating with anticipation. “It’s just a hat, right?”

“Yeah, just a hat,” Severus reassured.

Others around them were marveling at the few portraits on the wall, shrieked with surprise when they spoke to them and were too shy to speak back. One particular student, Lily saw, was staring fixedly at the ground, willing himself not to be sick. She figured she’d be the same if she never had met Sev.

“Yeah, whatever the test is, I’m gonna be ready for it,” James could be heard in the corner of the room. “I’ve watched my dad do all kinds of spells before. But if it’s some pop quiz or something, I’m sure I can get out of it.”

Before any retort could be made back to James, the doors opened to reveal Professor McGonagall again.

“The Sorting Ceremony is about to begin,” she announced. “Form yourselves in a line and follow me.”

Eager students filed in a single line as the Professor lead them to a set of heavy double doors. With Lily in tow behind Severus, peered up to the elevated platform where all the teachers seemed to be sitting. And on a rickety stool, the center of attention was on a brown, patched, pointed hat. Students jumped as the hat sprung to life, opening a rip above the brim like a yawning mouth. To the first year’s bewilderment, the hat started to sing:

“Here I sit with all attention

pointed right on me

and soon I’ll tell with much delight,

of what I can foresee.

I am the Sorting Hat of Hogwarts.

Why? That’s shown quite clearly

Step yourself up to this stool And your mind will work just plainly.

For in your mind, there is a secret

Of what? I can’t be sure.

But I can find them

And I can tell you what you have in store.

Is your heart filled to burst with kindness

and you think you’ve had enough?

Then I would think the perfect House

is dear, great Hufflepuff.

Or maybe you are cunning

and your drive is more than most.

Then I will welcome hither in

for you belong in Slytherin.

But if your mind is strong

And you’re unafraid to speak your flaws

then you value the gift of learning

and you’re true House is the one of Ravenclaw

Or you are brave and mighty

with courage to settle any score

You certainly show chivalry

Then you’re destined to be in Gryffindor

Please try not to be alarmed

And also try not to get upset

For I am the Sorting Hat and you will see

that I’ll leave you with no regret.

Come sit upon my chair

I can assure there’ll be no mishap

Let me welcome you to Hogwarts

For I’m their Thinking Cap!”

The hall erupted in applause and cheers and the hat gave hefty bows to each student table before appearing motionless again. Lily’s cheeks hurt from smiling. She couldn’t have thought of anything more enjoyable than that performance. But a knot formed prominently in her throat when she saw McGonagall standing next to the Sorting Hat with a large scroll that she knew her name was on.

“When I call your name, come sit on the stool to be sorted,” McGonagall stated to the waiting crowd. “Armando, William.”

A young boy with full baby cheeks stepped up to the hat and sat prominently into attention. The hat was lowered onto his head, getting caught by his large ears. There was a pause from the hat.

“RAVENCLAW!” the hat shouted.

The table to the immediate right of the center of the hall cheered loudly. The young William scurried to his new classmates.

“Black, Sirius.” McGonagall called.

Lily saw in her peripheral vision Sirius tense up. James and Remus clapped him encouragingly on the back. Peter gave an optimistic smile. Sirius sat on the stool and the hat sat on his head.

“GRYFFINDOR!” the hat immediately bellowed.

It took a moment, but a shell-shocked Sirius Black stumbled off the stool, flashed a grin to the other first years, and sat grateful at the Gryffindor table.

Realizing that she would soon be called, a terrifying thought crossed Lily’s mind. What was she supposed to think about when she had the hat on the head. That wasn’t stated clearly in the beginning introductions. Or it was and she just missed it. Panic flooded through Lily once more as she searched her mind for something to think about for the Sorting Hat. She looked to Severus and used him as her anchor for her nerves. Lily also peered around her at the different tables, looking at the different students. The older ones seemed nice. She really didn’t have to be intimidated at all. This school seemed forgiving and welcoming to all. There was even a boy in green robes with long, platinum blond hair. She thought he looked ridiculous and so Lily looked away quickly to avoid letting out a snicker.

“Evans, Lily.”

Jostled back to present, Lily managed a small grin as she stepped to the stool despite her shaking legs. When the hat came down on her head she thought a simple “Hello.”

The hat barely sat there a second before bellowing, “GRYFFINDOR!”

The table that had welcomed Sirius burst in applause and Lily made her way to her House. Looking back to Severus, he gave her fleeting smile which she returned; he seemed disappointed with Lily not being in Slytherin. She wanted to make it up to him somehow.

The Sorting continued and Lily had a ways to wait for the “S” last names so she could cheer on Severus. Name after name was called on Professor McGonagall’s list. After the name “Longbottom” went to Hufflepuff, Remus Lupin from the train was called. Sitting on the stool, the Sorting Hat crisply shouted “GRYFFINDOR!” and he made it to the table to meet Sirius’ high five. There was a “McDonald” and a “McKinnon” both to Gryffindor, “Nelson” to Ravenclaw, “Nobson” to Slytherin, and all the rest of the Sortings went quickly and efficiently. Until Peter Pettigrew.

The hat sat on his head silently, an internal pleading and struggle was plain on Peter’s face. After a few minutes, the hat bellowed “GRYFFINDOR!” and Peter collapsed at his new House table. Remus and Sirius gave him pats of congratulations. There was murmuring around the other tables. Lily heard the word “hatstall” being passed around.

The next sorting worth mentioning was the frivolous James Potter. He strode up to the hat with the utmost confidence and determination, seemingly charged on adrenaline alone. The hat spoke out “GRYFFINDOR!” before even grazing his head. James left the stool and gave a fist to the air in triumph. Sirius, Remus, and Peter cheered deafeningly as James sat at the table. Lily couldn’t help but smile at the cheeriness of the group.

Skipping a few, and McGonagall finally called “Snape, Severus.” Lily leaned forward and hoped that whatever happened, her friend would be happy in whatever House he was Sorted in. Thankfully, as soon as the hat met Sev’s head, it bellowed “SLYTHERIN!” and he quickly sat at his table. Lily and Severus met eyes and smiled from across the room but there was a bitter sweetness between them. The Sorting quickly ended and there was a gentle murmuring of voices across the hall. Most of the first years were discussing being starved. Lily overheard a few of her new housemates talking.

“I’m so hungry, I could eat a horse.”

“Don’t you mean a unicorn?”

“Don’t be stupid, James.”

“You’re right, I can do better.”

The crowd fell silent as a man at the head of the elevated table with a long white beard and half moon glasses. He spoke confidently.

“Welcome,” he began. “to a brand new year at Hogwarts! This year will, in no doubt, be better than the last! Let us all enjoy our feast!” And with a wave of his hand, the golden plates set in front of students in the hall were stacked to tipping point with food of the greatest variety. All the first years gaped and soon began loading their dishes to their heart’s content. Hurriedly, Lily stacked some mashed potatoes and roasted turkey onto her plate and began pushing away from the table when a voice interrupted her.

“My dear lady, where are you headed off to?”

Turning, Lily jumped at the sight of an actual ghost in a ruffled collar speaking to her. “-I was just going to-” Lily could only point in the general direction of Severus at the Slytherin table.

The ghost gave her a regretful look. “I’m sorry to say, you’re only permitted to eat at your House table with all of your comrades.” Lily nodded briefly and the ghost gave her a curt nod before passing right through her. Lily shivered as the feeling of cold water being poured over her head passed. She absent mindedly sat back at her spot and stared blankly at her food, deciding on what just happened.

“Honestly, you couldn’t tell at all. Everyone’s sure to look nervous when they step up.”

“Yeah, but my knees shook the chair,” The girl across the table fretted. “My large, door knob knees.”

“Alice, you’re worrying too much. At least you were sorted!” The battling voice assured Alice.

“Yeah, I guess. I mean, I’m in Gryffindor. Can you imagine? Me, all tall and honorable? I only thought Gryffindor were full of themselves, at least that’s what my mum always said, being from Ravenclaw and all that.”

“Some of that’s still true,” a third voice added in. She nodded her head over to a couple Gryffindor boys sticking hands and utensils through unsuspecting headless horsemen ghosts. Lily joined in with the other girls’ giggling.

“They’re supposed to be older than us, aren’t they?” Lily casually jibed.

“Quite right. But, at least there’s proof we won’t die of boredom at this school,” The first girl agreed. She turned to Lily. “Hi, I’m Marlene.”

“I’m Lily,” she smiled.

Alice had started running her hands through the blond hair draped over her shoulder. “I’m Alice.”

“I’m Mary,” said the voice from down the table.

“Happy first day,” Lily greeted.

“‘Tis a fine evening to be sure,” The ghost was back. “Especially with an excellent grouping of new Gryffindors like yourselves.”

“I bet you say that every year, Sir Nicholas,” Marlene said.

“That’s because it’s true every year.” Sir Nicholas decided as he glided away. As he was leaving, Alice leaned after him.

“It was nice to meet you!” she called.

Afterwards, there was a comfortable silence between the little group that resulted in Lily’s ears drifting farther up the table.

“I can’t believe it,” Peter gasped. “I bet I looked like a right git sitting there. In front of Dumbledore too! The Albus Dumbledore!”

“Aw, Pete. It’s not that bad. I’m just glad that we get to keep you around,” Sirius tried to console.

“But he’s a legend! I’d give anything to know what he thinks of me.”

“I wouldn’t worry about it. He’s been at this school for so long, every student probably looks the same to him,” James reassured cooly, popping an apple wedge in his mouth.

“And if he doesn’t take to you, I’ll bet he’ll get you like he did Grindelwald,” Sirius snickered.

“Bet that’d be a laugh, wouldn’ it?”

“It’d really be something to see them close this school. But that’d probably wouldn’t happen even then.” Remus exclaimed.

“Good to know I mean that much,” Peter grumbled feebly.

“Come now, Pete. You’re our pal now! You’re already part of our new team,” James said cheerily.

“What do we need a team for?” Remus asked.

“Rames, we have the opportunity of a lifetime here! Imagine it, all four of us ruling the school by 7th year. We’ve got to start early to make our mark as soon as possible. And you lucky lads have been chosen by me to help on my conquest,” James exclaimed.

“Whatever you want, mate.” Sirius conceded.

“No take backs,” James stated as Remus and Peter nodded in agreement with Sirius.

Lily picked up her glass and wondered about that group. James seemed to be full of himself. But, with one taste of her drink, he was pushed from her mind.

The feast ended with the rich desserts being cleared from each golden plate and the Hall was still fresh with new friendships being made. Dumbledore stood up once again.

“Before you all depart to your respected Houses, I have a few start-of-term notices to announce,” the entire hall was silent. “First years, you shall note that the forest on Hogwarts grounds is forbidden to enter. And if you’re an older student of Hogwarts, let this be your reminder.

“Secondly, I’ve been reminded by our caretaker, Mr. Apollyon Pringle, that there will be no wandering the corridors after hours and no magic is to be used between classes in the corridors.”

“And finally, Quidditch trials will be held in the second week of the term. Anyone who’s interested in trying out and playing for their house teams should contact Madame Hooch.

“Now, all of you, off to bed!” Dumbledore declared with a wide sweep of his hands and a wide grin on his face. The hall erupted with cheers.

The Head Girl and Boy of Gryffindor started leading the first years away towards their bed chambers. Lily purposely strayed to the back of the line and scanned the crowd of students for Severus.

“Hey Lily, are you coming?” Mary asked.

“I’ll catch up with you later!” Lily yelled back.

Lily finally saw Severus walking with the other Slytherins. They made eye contact and ducked together in the passing crowds.

“Hi,” Lily started awkwardly.

“Hey,” Severus said uneasily.

“Listen, I’m sorry that I’m not in the same House as you. There’s really no control over it.”

Severus held up his hands abruptly. “It’s okay. We can still hang out all the time… Slytherin and Gryffindor have a few classes together so we can still see each other.”

Lily sighed in relief at the reassurance. “I’m glad. I thought you’d think differently of me.”

“I’d never think badly about you, Lily.” Severus stated sincerely.

“Aw, Sev you’re the best.” Lily concluded. “I gotta go catch up with the others. I’ll see you later!” And Lily ran off, leaving Severus with a smile so big that hurt.

Lily followed the remaining crowd of Gryffindors down a hallway that led deeper into the castle. She was in the midst of upperclassman so she nimbly skirted back to the first years and landed right next to Mary.

“There you are! I was afraid you’d miss the password handouts.”

The mass of students made it to an open stairwell with giant, looming, stone steps leading to different landings. One of the leading voices instructed the students from ahead.

“Keep an eye on the moving staircases. They have that name for a reason. Please know where you’re going. Don’t get lost.” the Head Girl directed.

Better said than done, of course. Lily thought.

The first years were led to a portrait that touched the ceiling and floor. In the portrait was a woman in a pink, lace dress placed in front of an exotic background. Like the portraits from the waiting room, she came to life.

“Password?” she asked.

“Nether Wart,” The Head boy answered and the portrait swung forward to reveal the Gryffindor common room, a cozy, round tower room warmly lit with crackling firelight from the fireplaces; light bouncing off the overstuffed couches and chairs in the room.

“Hello all first years! My name is Claire Switch, your Gryffindor Head Girl for this year.”

“And I’m Head Boy, Michael Mcconville. If any of you have questions at all this year about schedules or where your classes are, come to us.”

“Now, we were fortunate to not run into him, but I advise you all to steer clear of Peeves the Poltergeist. But if Peeves does run into you, and you’ll know it because he’ll be throwing things at you, just ignore him.”

“Just letting you know about that. Now, girls dormitories are to your right and boys to your left. You’ll get your schedules first thing tomorrow morning. We’ll wake you up tomorrow in time for breakfast.”

“Sleep well!” Claire said before leaving, being trailed by Michael.

“Hey Marlene, can I bunk next to you?” Lily asked once everyone filed into their bedroom tower.

“Sure, of course.” Marlene yawned before sprawling on her poster bed.

Lily claimed her bed and pulled her curtains shut after poking her head out to bid a quick goodnight to her Gryffindor friends. She dug in her trunk from the side of her bed and pulled out one of her new quills, a parchment, and an ink bottle and started a letter to her parents.

Dear Mum and Dad,

I’m writing like I promised I would! Hogwarts is absolutely spectacular and I can tell that school’s going to be a blast. The train ride was lovely and I’m very safe and comfortable, so there’s no need to worry. I got sorted into Gryffindor house and I think I’ve made new friends already. Severus sends his love. I’ll write to you as often as I can. Tell Petunia I miss her.

Lots of Love, Lily

Lily knew that her parents would like a longer update on the last few hours but it was the best she could manage against her worsening fatigue. She tucked the letter on top of the heap currently in her trunk and got under the covers to finally conclude her first night at Hogwarts.

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