#just damian things

[ehliena]

I love how Damian’s reaction to something that looks like Jon not sure if it's Jon is to throw things at him.

From Super Sons

To when Jon came back after being aged up.

I wish Damian would just throw himself at Jon.

[batbabydamian]

happy booping! 🐾

[singswan-springswan]

In a happy world where Jason is legally resurrected and gets to go to college like he's always dreamed of

[violent138]

There comes a time when the criminals prefer being taken in by Batman, because his kids go a little overboard:

Goon: "You won't kill me."

Cass: "You ready to bet your life on that?"

Duke: *tosses her the gun they took off the guy* "I would do what she says."

---------

Random thug: "Hey Batman doesn't kill--"

Damian: "Not like he's here. You're certainly not going to be able to tell him."

---------

Tim: "Well, accidents do happen. Shame." *starts to let go of the rope*

Guy dangling off the building: "No, no okay, okay, I'll tell you!"

---------

Steph: *clears throat*

Gang members: "We surrender!" *multiple guns fall to the ground*

Steph: "I see my reputation precedes me, wise choice."

---------

*Bruce gets chewed out by Gordon by the Batsignal because the rumours have spread so much, it kind of sounds like Batman's kids have been going around murdering people*

Bruce: "In my defense, it's only one of them."

Gordon: "What."

Bruce: *realizes he never filled Gordon in on Red Hood*

[blackbatest]

my most controversial batman opinion to date

[logicallyblind]

something there’s a distinct lack of in batman fanfics, especially ‘brucie wayne’ centred ones is the networking he’d have to be doing on the daily to maintain that sorta reputation

like, we all know the man knows how to throw a gala but where are the brunches? the happy hour gossip session with his cover’s clique of the week? the golf club dinners he has to attend every third week of the month? what about visits to hospitals or schools or the soup kitchens for his philanthropy? come on now

you’re telling me he’s the most sought after celebrity in gotham city and beyond, an infamous playboy and supposed extroverted people person who can use long holidays that can last weeks at a time away in tropical islands supposedly partying it up as a plausible excuse to hide his injuries sometimes but when he’s in gotham he’s either at wayne enterprise meetings or tucked away at home alone? nah

i want to see bruce having to really utilise those meditation breathing skills he learned in the league while he’s having to sit upright in a chair with 4 broken ribs, a sprained wrist and a minor concussion in a painfully bright restaurant at 3pm on a wednesday having to listen to bethany-anne titter on about the latest gossip about her neighbours affair with the maid that’s basically an open secret by now like pls there’s so many different routes you can go with this depending on the genre,,, make bruce have to REALLY commit to that cover of his lmao

[batfamhastwitter]

Part 34! Alfred let Tim leave the poster up for a day before he makes him take it down

Prev ~ Beginning ~ Next

[noassamoas]

headcanon that alfred does not know what to get bruce for his birthday anymore, the man literally basically has everything. So, whenever he finds something that Bruce has lost, he hold onto it, and gifts it back. Everytime, Bruce is like “omg alfred, where did you find this?? Its been missing forever thank you ur the best”

nobody says anything whether they figure it out or not

[morganbritton132]

AU where Tim, age nine, walked three miles to his neighbor’s house, held up his bleeding hand to Alfred, and asked if he could please have a bandaid. He got stitches instead, and a hug from Dick, who squeezed him tight and asked, “Can we keep him?”

And then Tim never went home again.

He learns gymnastics with Dick and reads in the library with Jason. He shows Alfred how to reset the wifi and rambles on to Bruce about his latest obsession (shipwrecks), and he never sees his parents again.

Behind the scenes, there was a kid left alone in a mansion while a whole international incident played out. It included a kidnapping, a ransom, a failed hostage negotiation, and two dead parents never coming home.

It pokes at a wound in Bruce when he is told about the Drakes and he has always been productive in tragedy. He knows how to shove the hurt away and build something strong on top of it.

The adoption was seamless. The sell of the Drake Estate was effortless. The trust for Tim. The memorial. The scholarships in Jack and Janet’s names. Bruce does it all methodical and singleminded.

And somewhere. Somehow. They forget to tell Tim.

Sometimes he misses his mom and dad. He misses his old room and being alone in a big house, but months turn to years and he likes it here. He really does. He has brothers here and Alfred, and they say they’re his family. He likes that.

They said they wanted to keep him, so they kept him. Kept him forever.

Then Damian is there.

Tim comes home and there’s a new boy, about the age he was when they got him. Tim asks in a whisper, “Did they take you too?”

[ditzybat]

tim drake is the type of guy to drop random lore then walk away.

tim: ugh i hate baseball, it’s like, when you have to play it in order to save a whole planet once, every game after seem boring

dick: that’s not…

tim: only downside to that was how we almost totaled barts brand new spaceship

dick: what spaceship??

—

tim: oh, hi mom

shiva: hello timothy, how are you? still keeping up with your training i take it?

bruce: mother? she’s not your —

shiva: let’s spar then timothy, let’s leave it strictly non lasting injuries, i don’t rather feel like dying by your hand again today

tim: of course!! ^-^

bruce: again?

—

tim: man i forgot to take my meds again

duke: your meds for what?

tim: i have no spleen, so i have to take probiotics, it really is manageable but i dont know where those pills went

duke: i’m almost scared to ask, tim, how did you lose your spleen?

tim: weird spider dude, it was a whole thing

—

tim: you talk a lot of shit for someone who got replaced as heir to your immortal grandfathers empire by me

damian: you what!?

tim: i regularly beat his ass at online chess every week too, and i don’t think you’ve seen him since he stole your corpse

—

tim: here

jason: what’s this?

tim: a box of all the photos i took when i obsessively stalked you for your entire tenure as robin

jason: thanks?

tim: you’re welcome, bye!

jason: … creepy ass kid…

—

steph: so how did you to get together?

bernard: well —

tim: i saved him from a getting cut open by chaos monster cult members

bernard: yep, i was rescued from being a vessel for a greek god, and we just really clicked afterwards

steph: well, it’s better than the brick

[neptunezo]

The idea of the batkids scaring Bruce with “a new grandchild” to only show an animal is so funny to me, because imagine Bruce is so used to it that when Jason wants to introduce him to his new grandchild Bruce almost falls out of his chair when there’s an ACTUAL KID!

Dick: You’re a granddaddy now Brucie!!!

Bruce: WHAT?!? Who?? When??? How??? Actually don’t tell me how. Who is she??? When did she give birth???

Dick: What? No, meet my kid *holds up a cat* her name is biscuit and shes the love of my life!

—

Steph: Cass and I are adopting…

Bruce: Holy shit, actually???

Cass: Yes, it was a tough choice, but we want to adopt

Bruce: Do you need any help with paperwork and stuff? It’s kinda my thing. Also consider the fact that you might be too young.

Steph: Too young…?

Bruce: Yes, I mean you’re only in your 20’s, are you sure you can handle a kid?

Cass: Too young for an iguana?

—

Damian: It happened again, I have a kid.

Bruce: What do you mean AGAIN?!?

Damian: This is my second kid, duh

Bruce: Are you talking about goats?

Damian: Of course I am father

—

Tim: BRUCE YOU’RE GOING TO BE A GRANDFATHER!!!

Bruce: Tim I didn’t think I was going to have to tell you this again after the whole thing with Stephanie, but just kissing someone doesn’t get them pregnant

Tim:

Bruce: Is it a dog?

Tim: No it’s a tiger

—

Jason: I have something to tell you

Bruce(not looking up from his paperwork): Okay, what’s up?

Jason: I have a kid, I want you to meet your granddaughter

Bruce: I can’t possibly imagine what type of animal you’ve gotten, but I’d love to meet her

Jason: What the hell are you talking about?

Bruce (looking up to see an actual child): You actually have a kid????

Jason: Yeah, Roy and I thought it was time I adopted Lian

Lian: Hi Grandpa!!!

Bruce: I’m going to faint, grab me some ice will you?

[justa-smalltown-gargoyle]

This is not meant to be a dig more just an observation at why opinions differ, but I feel like the people who view Dick as being a fatherly figure to Damian/them having a Parent-Child dynamic vs a Older Sibling-Little Sibling dynamic don’t know what it’s like to have siblings that are waaaaaaaay older than you in a big family! They may take on a more guardian role but it’s still a different dynamic idk

[gotham-snark]

"It's never completely dark for you, is it? There's always a light on even if it's behind you"

[haveihitanerve]

Ok so, idea. Damian says ‘i love you’ as a sort of goodbye/thank you. Like for example “This evidence will prove very useful on this case, I love you Todd.” or “this photo of Titus is most adequate Drake, I shall have enough to start drawing. I love you.” or “The meal was most delicious Pennyworth, I love you.” And everyone coos and is like “aww.” even jason and they look at dick because like obviously dick taught damian that, hes the golden child, the one damian looks up to the most, the most affectionate one…

But the truth is, Damian learned it from Bruce. Damian is there when Bruce calls his other kids, he hears Bruce go “I love you.” As a goodbye the second after the child at the other end hangs up. He hears Bruce say ‘i love you’ to alfred, quietly, when hes patching him up after a mission, hears the frantic ‘i love you’s’ after someone gets hurt on patrol, and he thinks thats how its done. But Bruce seems to think the same as everyone else, that he got it from Dick, and Dick looks so pleased, Damian decided not to correct them. Besides, who do they think Dick got it from?

[breadandblankets]

Duke: "So then Ra's went-"

Damian: "You know that's not grandfather's name right"

Duke: "Hm?"

Damian: "that's not his name it's a title, you're supposed to say the whole title, his name isn't 'Head'"

Duke:

Damian:

Duke: "She give me Ra's on my Ghul til I…"

Damian, sighing, unsheathing a sword: "Thomas, I know you will survive this, so I will not be holding back"

[medusas-graveyard]

Damian's...a big brother?

He's been babied by the rest of the Waynes so what'll happen if Danny suddenly show up in the family being ± 2/3 years younger than him... Traumatized kid who thinks Damien's pretty cool yk.... The rest of the Waynes are pretty damn impressed that he hasn't killed Danny yet for being curious about him...Damian doesn't know why he's letting the newest stowaway follow him around either?

Eventually being Danny's favorite sibling (Totally not because he could go all out sparring with Dami. What? Psshh, no...) And the first name he screams when he's in trouble.