#just about a year of improvement
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jacob fursona to try and cure art block (again)
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the wall between us
redraw of this illustration series i made back in 2019. i'd say i've improved lol.
#ml#lovesquare#ladrien#adrienette#ladynoir#marichat#redraw#miraculous#miraculous ladybug#adrien agreste#chat noir#ladybug#marienette dupain cheng#mine#my art#my fanart#my ml fanart#mozzydraws#one of the biggest ways i've grown as an artist since i made the original post five years ago is with backgrounds#now just the quality of the bgs (tho that's obvs also important haha)#but honestly just the fact that i DO bgs like. at all#that was a huge huuuuuge chasm for me to bridge for myself#i lacked knowledge about creating backgrounds yeah#but i think the biggest thing was confidence!#now when i do bgs i go into the piece with a fierce determination#and with the desire to grow and improve with each illustration#so i feel so much more confident calling myself a character ILLUSTRATOR now#because i can put my characters into believable environments#that enhance the audience's experience/emotional connection to the piece#long ramble sorry lol
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hey so this is your permission not to improve at your hobbies. you dont gotta do more or try new things with it. you arent obligated. are you happy drawing the same 3/4 profile headshot of your blorbo??? do that. enjoy walking but dont wanna go further than your usual route at your usual pace? dont. enjoy collecting trading cards but dont actually like playing the game? never play the game. like learning the names of birds but dont care about their calls? just learn those names babeeeyyyy.
do what you want as you want and as many times as you want in the ways you want to. i am actually asking you to do this. you dont even need to get better. crush that weird feeling that you need to be doing 'more'. the goal doesnt have to be improvement. it might happen incidentally but like, thats whatever. you can set the goalposts and then just sit by them and enjoy the scenery. if you decide to move them or get up and sit somewhere else thats cool, but you dont gotta. doing things that make you happy is enough
#can Improvment be fulfilling? yes. but this aint about that.#being stationary can be fulfilling too. being content can be fulfilling. its okay not to try and optimize your hobbies#i spent a year not Trying To Be Better at drawing and just making my characters in little comics with noodle arms a big round heads#and it was so much fucking fun#i never got better at them. so many of them looked the same. didn't care it was fun to draw them#i enjoyed them. i enjoyed sharing them#and then i decided okay time for something different and moved along#you're allowed to rest on your laurels no matter what#you absolutely should be resting on your laurels
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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will
#svsss#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#the fact that people think scum villain#-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me#especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater#heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series#he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters#(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters#like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx#I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes#side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me#i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation#but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years#like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain#the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too#+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu#as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people#another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does#also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be#he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students#and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing#+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this#but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy
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Happy Valentine's Day! (and this blog's first post anniversary!)
#poorly drawn mdzs#better drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#Woah...it's been a whole *year* since I took the leap and uploaded my 'first attempt' art.#It's outdated now but it holds a special place in my heart for the fact it started all of this off.#Calling this 'poorly-drawn' was always about accepting that my art was going to be imperfect and messy - and doing it anyways!#There has been a staggering number of times I have drawn something I almost didn't upload because I didn't think it was 'good enough'#only for someone to say they liked it - or that it made them laugh. And it has helped me realize -#-The worst critic for my work has always been myself. If I listened to it all the time...well we would not be here now B'*)#And now that I have dabbled in other fandoms I can truly see how lucky was to start out with the MXTX fans.#The supportive messages and tags have truly been a guiding force toward my artistic and self improvement.#I really can't describe how grateful I am.#Thank you for seeing something worth rooting for when I was just figuring things out.#Thank you for being sweeter than the candy I have strategically hidden in the nooks and crannies of this house.#But watch out! If you forget to find them we will get ants.#I remembered to not hide chocolate in the bed this year. Yes I know it melted last time. Yes it did stain. I'm still sorry.#Thank you for loving me regardless <3 Even if it looked like I shit the bed real bad.
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OBSESSED with how lorelai calculatedly says the most inflammatory thing she can think of in order to stop chris's parents from targeting rory. this woman is standing in a tank of starving sharks and she dumps the chum bucket over her own head the instant straub makes her daughter uncomfortable. she doesn't cause a scene for no reason; she strategically weaponizes everybody's low expectations of her in order to stop straub from attacking rory and encourage him to attack her instead. and it WORKS. and she just sits there takes it. i see your daughter is just as out of control as ever, richard. but lorelai doesn't care what straub says about her because that was the point; she wants to him to come after her and forget that rory is there. if you'd attended a university as your parents had planned, and as we planned in vain for christopher, you might have aspired to more than a blue-collar position...you might not want to take such a haughty tone when you announce to the world that you work in a hotel.
and then she sends rory out of the room to safety and she sits there and continues to take it. she seduced him into ruining his life. she had that baby, and ended his future! and it doesn't matter because they're chewing on her and not her daughter and that was the point. she played them. they fell for it. and it doesn't mean that the things they say don't hurt her, because they do. it means she's willing to let herself be hurt in rory's place.
you can see the tense disapproval on lorelai's face when the group turns expectantly to rory like they're waiting for her to perform some kind of circus trick, and even though the gilmore grandparents + chris do it out of genuine admiration and pride, they don't understand how terrified rory feels about being asked to demonstrate genius on-demand in front of people who are already judging her for being born. rory looks reflexively at her mother with HELP written all over her face, and one needling comment from straub is all it takes for lorelai to offer herself up as a convenient (and familiar) punching bag.
#forgot i had this in my drafts...i think i was going to try to improve the gifs but i've done as much as i have the patience for#this episode is SO grainy#but anyway#@padmerrie forever thinking about that post you made like years ago that had a section in it that was like “he had never felt so safe”#all because of a vulgar t-shirt being worn to dinner in order to get the grandparents to focus their ire on that#it wasn't even a fic i just remember that. permanently#gilmore girls#vague bookends thoughts
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Redrew my Owen in The Jacket™ drawing from about eight months ago.
(Original here)
#the improvement goes crazy imo#for it having been less than a year#I used the same brush for the lineart too#procreate 6b the love of my life#I still stand by my love of this headcanon#especially with how it coincides with their red/blue dynamic#and it’s just about how Curt uses it as a comfort object after the prince is assissinated#in my mind- at least#I think about it often#every time I watch spies really#and whenever I draw curt wearing it#I have so many words about it#that I will not say- at least not right now#tcb spies are forever#spies are forever#owen carvour#agent owen carvour#joey richter#tin can brothers#tin can bros#my art
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Time and Time Again comes back tonight!
Thank you all for being so patient with me, I know it was a long hiatus.
My health was struggling, my arm was (is) hurting, and I decided it wasn't worth it. I'd rather be slow!
So thank you for giving me that grace, and I hope you'll be there with me for the rest of the series.
#like straight up. it's not worth it. idc how many people get mad at me#i would rather work fuckin. anything else than maintain this impossible schedule and keep hurting myself#if thats what it takes to do comics full time. then i can't do comics full time. simple as that!#i hope that for my next work i can have a healthier schedule and still make this work as my job#but if not. I'm never going back#i can't do it. 3 more years at this pace will take my ability to draw#anyways. its really good!!!#like genuinely i can feel a marked improvement in my skills#which is WILD!!! And I'm extremely happy about that!!!#just one more step into being better built to give people the quality stories they deserve.#ive not properly had the fire under my ass to finish stuff up but. its fine.#like i said? not worth it.#if i have to pause again then ill pause again. like i literally simply can not my body can't handle it#so. hopefully stuff goes smoothly but whatever happens will happen#whatever will be will be#i keep getting distracted lmfao#im excited about it coming back#and also. will. probably be distracting myself...#other creators dont read their comments. I'm like straight up not capable of that LMAOOO#i check for comments like all the time#love seeing em. love reading people's thoughts about my work#it makes me a better writer and keeps me connected to what matters most. which is my audience!#so i dont regret doing that but also. jts extremely distracting#i get straight up nothing done on big update days#cause im in the comments absolutely massive eyed refreshing.#this sounds obsessive. and it is. no jk#its just fun and keeps me in touch w peoples perception which helps me learn to write better#plus people are nice and ask me questions that i wanna answer#or if someone is being an ass. then i wanna tell them to leave (cause i cant block people) cause i consider it my responsibility#time and time again
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Redraw of the cape post, because that entire concept deserved better than the illustration I gave it.
#just give 12 a cape it's all I ask#yes I was watching Musketeers again#doctor who fanart#twelfth doctor#clara oswald#whouffaldi#twelveclara#guess who watched Heaven Sent + Hellbent again#I only cried half a tear but I did get Really sweaty#which is an improvement from last time#it took me about 8 years to getting round to watching those 2 episodes because Face the Raven destroyed me so hard#I'm pretty sure I couldnt eat for a whole day after FtR aired#although at that point I had been steadily absorbing Clara's personality into my own for a few years#I don't have a personality I stole it from Clara Oswald#read all of the 12clara books. listened to the audiobooks. Running out of content at a concerning rate#had to buy another comic#one day I'll have consumed all 12+Clara content. Then I'll just have to take matters into my own hands (make it myself)
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youve heard of sex flowers get ready for the flower that makes you into a celestial shoujo herione complete with particle effects you cannot turn the fuck off and creates a wifebeam so powerful it can incapacitate and maim and keeps making you burst into tears and fall on your ass which makes the wifebeam More Powerful and you also cannot turn this off either. and is also still, sort of, a sex flower
from one of my favorite fanfictions, Celestial Afterglow by elanor_pam, a fic that defies description in the best possible way
#arts#shen qingqiu#svsss#listen im not saying that ive spent a cumulative half a year reading this fic and then trying to make an arts for it#and then getting frustrated and stopping because i couldn't figure out how to make sqq shimmery enough#but like. im not NOT saying that#this is the FOURTH time ive started something for this bitch it haunts my fucking dreams and yet the opalescent glittery sqq evades me#perhaps you o unlearned fool look at this and say hmm that's too many colour layers and glowy effects but oh how wrong you are#if it doesnt make you literally fall over yourself at how otherworldly and radiant he is then there is room for improvement yet#perhaps you look at this and you think Wow!!! this gives me literally NO ideas what this fic is about#well Let Me Tell You. i have no fucking idea how to summarize this fic#its not often the tags in a fic give me pause but i saw this and as i read the tags i was increasingly just like What#but i have no idea how to describe it. the tags arent NOT accurate but i was SO unprepared for what happened in like an extremely pos way#if i were tagging this i think i would give it the no archive warnings apply label if that matters to you#the author seemed they wanted to leaned towards over caution rather than risk missing anything re tags because This Is A Weird Fic#but oh my fucking god#i am gripping you by the shoulders i cannot stress enough how charming it is#brilliant characterization especially with airplane in the first scene#and also so much fucking funnier than i thought possible for the general setting summary tags and buildup#its just. ough. its good
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QuinObi Week Bonus! Part 6/5 - First / Previous
Bonus: Thank you! Track: 'The Wreck of Our Hearts' - Sleeping Wolf (Spotify / YouTube)
They're sailing the world together~
Made one more piece to celebrate the end of the week and as a huge thank you to the mod @kcrabb88 for hosting the event!
Enjoy! And remember to check out @quinobiweek for other amazing works with these two :3
#QuinObi Week#Bonus#because we love them just that much#and wanted to say thank you :3#it was so much fun to participate again this year#and seeing my art improve too has been cool#whatever thoughts I've had of a very old au about a marine biologist and an astronaut is for me to suddenly ponder again#but again#thank you!#quinobi#obiquin#voswan#quinlan x obi wan#quinlan vos#obi wan kenobi#star wars#my art#fanart
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I truly, TRULY, do not understand the Night Yorb hate. The fact that it was invented whole cloth from a bit is so fun! It was the cliffhanger from the last season! It burst out of Riz's chest after they said the name too many times! It's a giant sting-ray of darkness! The Hangman and Hanvan have been warning everyone about saying the name since the middle of last season!
Sorry you all hate joy and fun and are begging Brennan to get it out of the way to move on to the REAL story, but I'm here for any and all Night Yorb content, and would honestly be *thrilled* if they kept up stuff about it all season. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go join the Choir of Eternal Night and continue petitioning for a Night Yorb plush from Dropout.
#dimension 20#fantasy high#junior year#night yorb#i had heard the cast joke about how young the demographic for d20 tends to skew but i thought it was just joking#and figured that was more twitter anyway but apparently not!#MY favorite bit of the improv show is when they improv jokes that brennan folds into their reality because that's the whole fucking point#sorry you can't see that and want the improv show to be a pre-written sanitized 'everyone behaves perfectly' show#without bits and surprises and shifting points based on improv choices#could not be me#i love the night yorb. i love the night yorb bits. i love the yorbies. i love the improv nature of the show.
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If you've been here a while you've probably noticed I started drawing Holly's face a lil different recently, and that's bc they have a new design!!!!
Say hiiii Holly
#my art#hollow knight#ill prolly do a turn around#and different stages#like my original ref of them#but that's something for future feather to worry about ahshdjxj#the hollow knight#thk#pure vessel#hk pv#hk hollow#hollow knight gijinka#gijinka#might post this next to the original design actually bc it was just under a year old when I started the redesign#turns out being hyperfixated on a character for a year helps improve ur art skills#who knew
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the more i dm vs play other ttrpgs the more frustrated i get with how npcs work in 5e. my game centers around a small town with a recurring cast of npcs, as well as newly introduced npcs each arc that my players frequently adopt, and every time i open my Documents (tone: weary) filled with npcs i just wish 5e npcs were Built Different(tm) to pcs. obviously theres statblocks and stuff you can use but if youre working under the assumption these npcs are Full People who are going to take up space in the pcs lives youre going to be building them like you would a pc and frankly it sucks for a couple reasons
one, if i want to introduce a new batch of npcs of a level that will prove imposing for my pcs to fight, it shouldnt take me 10 hours to make them. two, once the fight is happening it would be great if they didnt have so many abilities and spells that im just hoping and praying i can make them function even a little smartly without grinding the whole fight to a halt every time its a spellcasters turn
and third, which i think deserves its own paragraph(s), i wish npcs didnt have the same set of skills that pcs get
i like trying to give my guys, pcs or npcs alike, pretty high mods on things, bc, you know, good for the game and also big numbers fun. but some skills are either inherently useless for an npc to have, or imply a loss of player agency if i was rolling them
like, charisma skills. deception is really useful for an npc to have, because then pcs have to roll insight against it to learn information. persuasion, however, is not something an npc should really ever roll. if theyre rolling persuasion on a pc, that player is experiencing a loss of agency over how their pc reacts to a request. if theyre rolling it on another npc, youre now just playing dollies with yourself while the pcs watch. if im ever choosing between persuasion and deception for an npc, im always going to give them proficiency in deception even if that makes less sense for their character. same problem for intimidation. either youre telling the pcs how to feel or playing dollies with yourself
stealth and sleight of hand are overall way more helpful for npcs than for pcs who arent rogues. and perception is far more useful for an npc to have than like ... survival. when are your npcs going to be rolling survival? if you have a ranger or ranger-like character whos helping your pcs navigate wilderness then why does it make more sense for them to be rolling survival and potentially mess up something they are meant to be good at, causing potentially unfun complications for your party, than just ... knowing that character can help them navigate, so they do? especially if thats the reason that npc is there?
idk like my players respond very well to the npcs being Full People and i do think theres a level of enjoyment to like. comparing pc and npc stats or players learning what feats an npc took or lore around subclasses but also. also im so miserly and decrepit and my google doc of my four bad guys this arc and their spells is 59 pages long im Tired Save Me
#dnd#dnd 5e#i love playing dnd. and i love the game that i run. i dont love running dnd.#its simply not a good system to run for so many reasons#i feel like i run a good game from like. years of original storytelling and improv experience and a large amount of homebrew#and absolutely nothing about the system itself. very frequently fighting the system itself#(before anyone says just switch this game has been going for years and is very entrenched in the fact that its dnd)#(both in characters and also the world and lore)#(but good lord will i not be running dnd again when this game eventually ends)#(getting my grubby little hands on something pbta or fitd maybe)#if any of my players see this i am only filled with immense love for our game but i tried to look up something on cavs sheet earlier#and felt my old man soul withering a bit so#This Post.
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SIENA ROSSO and ANTHONY BRIDGERTON
-> Bridgerton 1.08: After the Rain (1/3)
#bridgerton#bridgertonedit#bridgertongif#siena rosso#anthony bridgerton#anthony x siena#santhony#perioddramagif#perioddramaedit#tvgifs#tvedit#sabrina bartlett#jonathan bailey#recently realized that I tried to gif that scene about a year ago when I first started making gifs#and i wanted to redo it as i've definitely improved quite a bit since then#also still obsessed with that scene#easily top ten#reuploading because it wouldn't show up on my blog or in the tags#so i'm sorry if you saw me post this a few times#split the gifset in half in case the length was the issue#if not ... well then i guess this will just exist in a void lmao#my gifs#atrscene*#tv
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beardsley’s commitment to being a cleric is honestly commendable because if i was playing kristen she would actually manage to find power within herself after having so many brush ins with divinity and learn that no god can make your life just right so she just had to believe in herself and find the ability to heal within (ie respecing as a divine soul sorcerer)
#but also i main sorcerer soo#it’s not my fault that sorcerers are fun#i mean it’s just a nepo baby wizard with cool lil points i can spend to improve my shit#d20#dimension 20#d20 spoilers#d20 fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#dimension 20 fhjy#fantasy high#kristen applebees#ally beardsley#adventuring party#this is about the comment in the adventuring party
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