#just a few minutes each probably | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dovewingkinnie · 10 months ago

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the urge to make a series the urge to make a series the urge to make a serie

#ive been planning #scheming #i have several stories i could choose from #to make a series out of #obviously it would be suuuper short #and simple #like im not talking 20 minute episodes #just a few minutes each probably #im not insane enough for that Yet

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trashcatsnark · 6 months ago

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Rejecting Lae'zel: yeah sorry not interested in you tasting my flesh lol- yeah you can go fuck astarion instead i don't care Rejecting Astarion: Say please.... ha, yeah, it's still a no, but that was funny, anyway... Rejecting Shadowheart: *didn't even realize i did it* Rejecting Gale, Wyll, or Karlach: Oh god, oh god, oh no I'm so so so so so so sorry, I, I really hope I didn't like lead you on- please don't look at me with those eyes, please, oh no, I'm so sorry I'm just doing a different romance right now, I still care about you so so so so so so so much, I'm sorry I'm just a terrible person, I'll be flaying myself alive tonight in penance, I'm so sorry-

#baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #gale dekarios #karlach cliffgate #wyll ravengard #to be clear this is not any hate to the other three this is just genuinely my experience each time #probably just because laezel and astarion start off approaching it as just sex so i don't feel bad just being like no i don't wanna fuck lo #and shadowheart unless you have the wine night with her at the party genuinely just does no come across as trying to romance you imo #i did feel bad the one time i did wine night with her and then did reject her after #i literally have the game paused rn to avoid rejecting karlach for a few more minutes #also this is probably a little disingenuous because i've never rejected gale i always romance him BUT STILL

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icewindandboringhorror · 2 months ago

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Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~

(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)

#ootd #jfashion #fashion #fantasy fashion #mori kei #....like... adjacent... lol #no idea what style this would be lol.. makes me think of like whimsical vaguely fantasy themed childrens book character #finally posting one of my aforementioned seven million drafts of actual outfits and costumes i have finished and edited #the photos for but just never feel like posting lol..#I need to find one of those people whos like 'omg i am ADDICTED to social media ugh i wish i could get off of it #im just browsing and posting like 60 times a daaaaay!!!' and take a little magical bottle and suck some of the social media #enthusiasim out of them. for moi. In exchange they can have some of my 'literally just never in the mood to post or interact with the #outside world ever' energy. We can balance each other. huzzah and so on #Though I think maybe it's part of the general thing I've heard of like.. I can't remember if it was in reference to adhd or just some sort #of general execcutive functioning issue type of thing - but the idea that things have to be ''just right'' before you do something. like #'oh i need to do this task. but i have to wait until XYZ first' or 'oh i can do this but only if X specific condition is met' or etc #The fact that I even have to be in a Specific Mindset to post. or sometimes will delay posting on social media because like 'oh well #I'm going somewhere tomorrow. somehow this matters. i cannot spend 5 minuts posting TONIGHT. clearly it will interfere #somehow schedule wise with the doctor appointment i have 15 hours from now. yes. yes. i must wait until my appointment is over #tomorrow afternoon. THEN i shall post' or etc. etc. lol. NOT even taking into account the many days #I just genuinely and physically sick and it's not even a mental thing. I just physically dont feel like sitting at the computer lol..#ANYWAY.. trying to get back into it. trying to get a business bank account.. make a proper paypal so i can start selling sculptures again.#selling clothes and sculptures.. posting about such things then of course as one must. etc... chanting to hype up and motivate myself lol #But yes. this is my favorite outfit out of the bunch so I am posting it first I guess.. maybe others later..#Also the purple dress says its from shein. which I've heard is bad fast fashion stuff. but maybe okay since its second hand? I havent #been to the bins since like 2020 or late 2019 even. and I think stuff like shein and temu has only become poular in the past few years #but I bet if I went to the bins now I might would find a good handfull of that stuff. Probably now not much different than what you #find in a walmart or a forever 21 or actual physical stores you can go to though. I hear quality of clothing is down everywhere no matter #where you get it or whatnot. What bountiful joys unfettered capitalism and exploitation bestows upon us (<being sarcastic).#Wearing one of my favorite little vests though. I love the texture of it and the clasps on it

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faaun · 9 months ago

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pls i need to provide updates

#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year #and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire #and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f #friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl #acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what #are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and #friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me!#LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after #everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to #invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me #i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother #and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids #so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo #any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷‍♀️#but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd #and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk #THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date #w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a #few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay #scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK #like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl #like is that even doable #but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much #.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us #god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x #but it would be soooo funny #I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed #popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x #i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like #its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe

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silusvesuius · 4 months ago

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g*lmar rly has to be the best skajrim character on the real like even if you don't like him he just is . literally The best one i think......... on dat note i also imagine that he and ulfr*c despite being fairydust BFFs for lyfe genuinely have the worst communication skills ever seen

#text #but i already talked about how g*lmar is weird about ulfr*c anyways #literally jubilant and feeling special cus he's the only person ulfr*c actually trusts and speaks to outside of formal conversations #he's a very manly man too (like N*loth) for wanting to just control everything... well actually having ulfr*c under 'control' is enough 4 -#- him. unlike n*loth who wants to be above everything that moves. literally not about him tho #i hope that other st*rmcloaks develop a habit of going to hide downstairs in the palace whenever they can tell the vibe between -#- g*lmar and ulfr*c is off because they're gonna be yelling at each other and throwing shit around for 40 minutes in a few seconds #i don't believe they'd fight insanely often but being at an active war probably gets them heated more. Often than usual; and their -#- conflicts are never resolved. i feel like they just don't talk to each other for a good 2 days and act like nothing happened #they're way too manly and prideful to actually let the other one 'win' so they just don't say anything ever post-arguing #Tbhs g*lmar actually really likes that ulfr*c is so unstable and harrowed because it makes himself feel very good and reliable -#- but he has his limits 😂LMFAOO i bet sometimes he gets really tired of him being so traumatized. very rarely but he does think about it #i'll have to desribe that a bit better later tho... don't know how to word it atm #but maybe he wants to punch him or something BYE. no...... 💔savage as hell #he likes it in a very general sense of ulfr*c's personality especially between them but doesn't like it when it causes them to clash #this might just be mostly ulfr*c's doing cus i doubt he's actually talkative about his past issues and Troubles (torture mayhem) and -#- can't communicate anything about it or set boundaries when needed. he just gets mad or very avoidant. No fixing that tho #well it's just shameful to him so he'd rather do nothing than even admit anything to anyone Everrrrr #why does his life suck so bad LMFAOOOOOOOOO #their nasty musty mutualism .. leeching off your traumatized Bff so that he can make you feel good by saying he needs you in particular #while U pay him back with some support.......SOME #Oh well #that zero communication between some sk*rim characters looks yammy as fuck to me. A;lways. ALWAYS #nelvas is power dynamic induced...... g*lmar&&ulfr*c trauma-caused... elituli Um😂 t*llius doesn't even know any hobbies she has #bye this is why they're serving so hard

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hecatesbroom · 6 months ago

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Rewatching the crown and oh wow, I forgot how good this show is

#i went on a 15 minute rant to my poor mother after finishing the first 2 episodes and i held back SO MUCH #seriously. i could pick this show apart frame by frame and have something to say about each one of them #it's just!!!! SO good #the storytelling (in *every* area!! acting. writing. cinematography. music. i can go on!)#anyway if you hear less from me these next few weeks i'm probably busy meticulously picking apart scenes from the crown in my mind #because oh. my god #i can't #(also- rewatching this i remembered how much the crown taught me about storytelling?? i distinctly recall taking lots of mental notes #about how to say things without *saying* them when s1 first aired. because it's a masterclass in showing instead of telling!!)#even the dialogue shows rather than tells in a lot of instances #i'l shut up now but AAAAA #autism reactivated shfjdj #i forgot i was fixated on this for a good few months every year or so between the ages of 14 & 18 lol #and for good reason holy shit #alys.txt #the crown #<- probably best if i make a tag

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mechazushi · 1 month ago

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If The Core Division Three Members Had Gaming Channels...

Kafka Hibino {A.K.A ComfyManGaming}: Mainly Shop Management Sims or just Sims in general. His most popular series and the one that let him go full time as a content creator was his Power Wash sim Story Time where he got to talk about the craziest things that happened to him in his, like, six different cleaning jobs. ( In order; Landscaper, personal maid service, High rise window washer [tied for origin for most of his craziest stories], Nuclear Power Plant Office janitor, Failed attempt at running his own power wash service, and School Janitor with a car detail side job. {Most recent/longest held job/and also tied for craziest story origin generator with Car Detail Horror stories being second). Can be convinced to play atmospheric games like Journey/Abzu/Fire Watch/Anything thought provoking or emotional.

Reno Ihchikawa{A.K.A IchyChill Breakdowns}: Whatever Windette does, but with less insults. Basically Build Breakdowns and Speedrun Tutorials. Carried with the energy of a tired Indian Math teacher trying to teach calculus to 8th graders. Is also [technically] a PNG tuber, but because he's low energy, the PNG doesn't move much.

Iharu Haruichi {A.K.A SharkBAIT}: Two Channels. One is a horror game channel, Both Indi and Triple A. The other is anything casual, but mainly sticks to Stardew Valley, Animal Crossing, Coral Island, that sort of thing. Fans like to call the Horror one Anxiety and the non-horror one Anti-Anxiety(Each have their own mascots and like to fight each other like Jacksepticeye and Antisepticeye). He has absolutely accidentally cross posted horror vids onto the non horror channel and vice-versa. The community like to pretend that they don't interact with the other channels and when that sort of thing happens, they pretend they've been exposed to horrors beyond comprehension. (yes, even when the horror channel gets a cutesy vid)

Mina Ashiro{ A.K.A Can(n)onGodess/Pr3ttyW1ttl3K1tty}: Also Two channels, but actively makes sure that no one knows she runs both. One is a live stream of FPS set up as no-commentary/with camera (Mainly colorful ones like Valorant). The other is also no commentary with NO camera and its Sim 3 or 4 tips-and-tricks and Minecraft Aesthetic House Build (Mod and No Mod.)

Kikrou Shinomya:{A.K.A Can_It_Doom?} A STEM major that couldn't find a use for her degree as fast as she liked, so she started a Can it Run Doom? channel as a joke, and now it's evolved into a channel where people recommend different setups like Drumset Controler on a Texas TI-84 Graphing Calculator. (Is also currently in the middle of working on a live action Tank Setup for World of Tanks as a subscriber goal.)

Hoshina Soshiro{A.K.A SwordSingerSUPREME} Any game that involves sword fighting and critiques it either Accurately or HARSHLY. Also streams his HEMA training/tournaments. It's very popular (because everyone find him hot) and has since become a bit of an eclectic channel that is split between his Gaming vids, his HEMA vids, and P.O Box unboxing vids where people send him A LOT of gifts. There's also an over an hour video of him playing Let's Hit Each Other With Fake Swords the Card Game with his older brother (who is also in HEMA.) that he made when the channel hit 5 million subscribers.

✨Bonus✨

Gen Narumi{A.K.A xXGenNarumi420Xx}: Plays anything that's currently trending, but his bread and butter is FPS or Run and Guns. (Has confessed to saying "Would" to the Ultrakill Robot.)

Okonogi Konomi{A.K.A BlossomBear}: Indi VTuber that plays exclusively Indi Puzzle games or Puzzle Platformers. Isn't a singing VTuber so much as one that can and will go in-depth on programming and what goes into a VTube model (She made hers and it has two forms : a chibi, curly white haired, anthro bear girl and a white plushi version with orange blossom motifs.) Can and has demonstrated to be an absolute GOD at Minesweeper

Minase{A.K.A MinAction}: A anime/movie/Western Animation reaction channel. Has an uncanny habit of predicting things before they should be obvious.

Hakua{A.K.A HakuaKooksXP} A cooking channel whose shtick is 1000 Ways To Prepare [Insert Food Here.]. She's still currently working her way through rice.

Haruichi Izumo {Goes by his name} Various product review channel.

Aoi Kaguragi {Also goes by his name} A very well made workout channel.

#Kafka held two school janitor positions. One in an elementary and the other in a University.#He gained some internet fame before his channel existed when he interrupted a group of kids Livestreaming Pokemon in the public bathroom #They were stuck on a boss when Kafka came in.#He then proceeded to decimate the boss with the same setup the group was considering tossing out for being to underpowered.#Was friends with Mina in elementary. Passed by an advertisement that said she would be showing up at a convention and decided to stop by.#This was before his channel took off. They found it ironic they became professional gamers now.#He runs a plus sized friendly merch store with a couple novelty items.#One subscriber sent Hoshina a 4XL hoodie as a joke. He thought it was funny too until he put on the hoodie.#Has confessed to sleeping in it and it hasn't failed to show up for a stream once. There are even reports that he brings it to HEMA events.#It got to the point that Kafka custom ordered and sent Hoshina a comically large coffee mug for his birthday.#Its about the size of an Oktoberfest mug and it made Hoshina very emotional.#Reno has his own version of the “I know what you are” Dog meme but its a gif.#His gamer tag is something I threw together last minute out of his last name and cold motif (please let me know if you have anything better #Iharu and Reno didn't know each other until the community started shipping their mascots together.#Now they're best friends who have started doing this whole “gay for the bit” relationship.#It doesn't help that Reno has show up in the background of Iharu's stream and has been seen spending the night at Iharu's place.#even though they live in different states and refuse to offer an explanation #Can(n)onGoddess and BlossomBear stream together a lot. It's probably the few times you'll hear Mina willingly speak.#I forgot to mention that Hoshina has a glass cabinet filled with s*x toys from his subscribers.#He keeps telling them to not do that but it still happens on occasion. Now it's just a statement piece in the background of his streams.#I just felt making this.#Btw ya b*tch is 22 today #🎉🍾🎉 Yay me.#guess this is my version of a celebration.#kaiju no. 8 #kn8 #kaiju no 8 #kaiju number 8 #kaiju 8 #kaiju no.8

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tearingdread · 5 months ago

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havin a normal one 👍

#do u ever see ur irl friends hanging out w each other and get jealous bc u weren’t invited even tho u probably wouldn’t have enjoyed #the activity they are doing #god it’s always fucking like this. ive always fucking felt this since i was a kid and I thought it was better now that i had better friends #but apparently not #ive gotten better at initiating but fuck why do i always have to do it #i still need to improve a lot but man why the fuck can’t i just have people who want me around and make an effort to make me feel that way #im trying and its so fucking difficult to break this routine ive set and i know i need to try harder #but fucking god #it really doesn’t help that i have this notion that everyone hates me bc there is something fundamentally wrong w me #and i know im overreacting and my friends do not hate me #and that there isn’t anything so terrible that it would make every person I meet hate me #but sometimes when no one makes the effort towards you it’s hard to see that #it’s also awful bc it seems like the few times they do reach out abt something it’s last minute and i can’t prepare for it appropriately #so i end up rejecting the offer #and it seems like whenever i can’t make it onve i never get asked again #idk i hope im just being dramatic and my chronic loneliness is coloring my perception #anyway. i think i have therapy next week so.

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floral-hex · 7 months ago

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Two hours. I got two hours of sleep. I’m so frustrated with myself.

Went to the ER. Everyone was very nice. They gave me an IV bag of fluids (I was dehydrated! Sad cactus!) and a little ativan (teeny dose), which was nice at the time! Just a little amount, but the (mostly) quiet room, fluids, and meds managed to relax me a lot. Could have fallen asleep if the bed was actually comfortable. Then they packed me up, gave me another little Ativan to take home for tonight, and said they’d contact my primary. Cool cool. Got some much needed food on the way home, then took the pill and got comfy. Again, smallest dosage they make, so no feeling too good. Managed to muscle past my anxiety to fall asleep, and… 2 hours. Woke up. Tried to go back to sleep. Too frustrated and anxious and I feel like crap. What should I do? Just eat a whole gummy and hope that knocks me out? For me, that feels like playing roulette. Could work, yeah. Could make me sleepy and pliable. Could also backfire and make me feel sick and extra anxious for another 5 or 6 hours. What do I do? Roll back up to the ER? “Hewwo, I woke up and I need more benzos 👉👈��” haha funny, but I’ve seriously been thinking about it 😑

God, I’m miserable. Been sitting outside on the porch for a bit. Not quite an hour. Needed to get out of the apartment, but tbh, nearly 4am outside isn’t doing much for me. I just feel alone. It wouldn’t help with sleeping, per se, but just someone, I dunno, hugging or holding me for a few minutes would honestly save me a little. What a mess. Oh yeah, and apparently my kidneys are going 👎👎👎 down. Bad meat. Not great test results. Not what I’m focusing on tonight. I’m a mess. Anyway, this was my update. Sorry for all the walls of text. Suppose this is mainly for me to look back on in the future, but can’t pretend it’s not at least a little validating to put this all out into the world and knowing that maybe one or two people read this and I didn’t suffer completely without recognition. Yeah…

#this is a lot of text #not really a casual read #ok ok… I can’t sit outside forever #gonna go back inside and I dunno make a hot chocolatey drink. grab some snacks #TRY to feel good even though I don’t #YES will probably get a little high #hoping that the combo of sugar. salt. and thc will give me the sleepy tools to just pass out for awhile #just a few more hours! please!#omg I was so pissed when I woke up and thought I’d slept for awhile but realized I hadn’t #’ what do you mean the last text I sent was only two hours ago? ‘#seriously. I thought I fell asleep around 11 pm but it was closer to 1am.#stupid sexy ativan. messing with my sense of time #it really wasn’t that big of a dose! I was basically a little buzzed for an hour or so each time #but the doctor was nice and straightforward with me. I just dunno tho. I’m a big guy with a history of anxiety. .5mg is weaksauce #god I’m getting anxious just sitting here thinking about trying to sleep again #it’s feeding on itself. I’m trying to rationalize this but it’s just this feedback loop.#is this my life now? I’m outside. I feel so alone. I feel like I could die any moment. in a sword of Damocles way. it’s there and waiting.#ok sitting outside isn’t helping #after 4am and yes I see cars driving by. I hear the occasional siren. but I still feel alone in the world #please tell me life goes on? please tell me we’re not really at the end here.#I always feel like I’m staring at our final days. that we’re all barely here. fucking ghost planet. waiting to die.#there’s war and hate and everything is expensive and I can’t.. I’m not a part of this world. I’m too poor and sickly and so it all seems…#like we’re on our last leg. like the final days of a fire sale. this body feels fit for the grave. this world is the grave.#I’m scared #ok like I said sitting out here isn’t helping. Ian. please stop.#yes. yes. ok. snacks and drinks and distracting tv. let’s try this again.#sorry this is a lot #I spent the last 20 minutes writing these tags and getting progressively more anxious 😬#you can ignore this #text

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obstinaterixatrix · 2 years ago

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I don’t know how to explain why I’m like. dropping my opera glasses during temenos’ route, they’re not actually saying/doing anything particularly risqué or shocking, it’s like. you can’t see me but I’m covering my mouth pensively. it’s like blueberry shot homoeroticism

#orlbs #otiilb #I feel like I would sound insane describing this to anyone who doesn’t know what bl is #like it’s like. people who aren’t gay and don’t care about gay relationships could probably go like wow this is a very normal relationship #meanwhile me and air have to pause every few minutes and sit in contemplative silence #stare at each other in shock like Did You Hear What He Just Fucking Said

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exopelagic · 10 months ago

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okay facing consequences of my actions

#I thought I’d gotten away with it this time #okay it’s 3am and I may have discovered something that completely ruins me #everyone is asleep so I can’t tell if this is me being sleep deprived or not!#so I need to sleep now but I haven’t cleaned my code up or written my answers #I do Not have time #if I don’t sleep now I’m gonna be having a bad time tomorrow morning and I am significantly less productive rn than I could be #with other people around I kinda need that y #so I should go to bed. but also. this code needs cleaning. but also. even if I fall asleep now I’m only getting like 5 hours MAX #I need a good few hours tomorrow morning to have a shot at doing this properly #so it would be more useful to sleep now and wake up as early as possible than keep going tonight bc I’m not going to finish tonight #okay. fuck. I hate this #if I could think straight I’d be able to fix this easy which is probably a good reason to sleep #it’s just an annoying logical problem that I gotta follow through bc currently I’m stuck between three possibilities and there might be more #I have these two rasters and I gotta calculate the area overlap #the first method counts the number of presence points in each (probably) and then counts the number in overlap raster w manually set values #the second counts total predicted points and points where they’re predicted to be alone and does a calculation with that for each species #that one with all points from both species + pseudoabsence. vs method 3 which does that with just individual species coordinates #method 1&2 are now homologous now I JUST caught the logical error but method 3 is what he gave us #but actually he might have fucked up in not including pseudoabsence #i don’t know if method 3 works for two different species either honestly #it gives me results I like much more (my overlap is 100% for one of the species and that shoooouldnt rlly happen even if it’s possible) but #I think it might actually just be wrong because it can’t account for #wait so the line is taking the prediction for all coordinates for each species for each species’ initial coordinates. and not pseudoabsence #and that set of predictions for each species coordinate set is then taken and yeah it’s no longer comparable you can’t count each alone #not with two different species bc you need an overlapping dataset to do that OKAY I have solved that logical problem my initial method works #which is annoying bc the result sucks but whatever I checked the rasters and it’s actually identical so #okay now I’ve figured that out. twenty minutes later. sleep I think it’ll help most #luke.txt

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tortademaracuya · 1 year ago

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*spongebob's hawaiian cocktail playing* I'm gonna end up texting first like always aren't I

#bro i feel so lonely 😭#if i text this one friend and actually say yes im most likely gonna feel even shittier afterwards like always but like #i dont have. a lot of options to choose from. haha #:(#i wish i still had people that wanted to hang out with me i have to do everything lately #and i feel like such a burden asking people to put up with me #i passed near an ex friends house today so im feeling too nostalgic ig #tengo que levantar la pala de una buena vez asi no tengo tiempo para nada. ni para sentirme mal #haunted.txt #i do all the reaching out on this one friendship in particular #be it trying to check on her. just talk or visit #i dont mind going to buenos aires but it would be nice if we could hang out here sometimes #and I KNOW she comes here sometimes. she just never wants to see me in particular when she does :(#she always has other stuff going on the few times we hang out so she will either be ignoring me #or doing whatever else she needs to do while i wait outside or drag behind her #which i dont mind usually! i love acompanying friends to do whatever tasks they need to do #but when i see a friend i had to travel 2 hours to get there and we see each other maybe two times a year #it would be nice if at least i could talk to them for more than 5 minutes you know :)#im probably complaining about stupid stuff

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aroaessidhe · 2 years ago

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2023 reads // twitter thread

Song Of Silver Flame like Night

YA wuxia/xianxia inspired fantasy

a girl in a colonised country with a mysterious seal on her arm left by her mother before she was killed

when a state magician finds her, she escapes with a boy to his school of secret traditional magic practitioners, and discover the secrets her mother left her

powerful demon gods

#Song Of Silver Flame like Night #aroaessidhe 2023 reads #with the caveat that i am clearly not the audience. i kinda hated this lol #for a few very specific reasons #i think there’s interesting concepts & worldbuilding #but i am just so burnt out on girl-and-boy-with-no-friends-and-instant-attraction-travelling-together as the centre of a story yknow #this random girl dies and then after she’s referring to her as her best friend but like….i didn’t get that from their single conversation.#it almost feels like shoved in last minute because of feedback of no other female friendships #when there’s finally another woman it’s the stereotype of a mean girl. and they are just calling each other bitches and whores….like jesus…#she is so one dimensional but also in concept she is 20x cooler than the mc sorry i’m rooting for her now #from the end seems like they’ll be forced to work together and probably become reluctant allies/friends in book 2 or something but like….#if that was intended from the beginning you have to make the initial hatred make sense in the first place #also boys getting all embarrassed by periods……it’s 2023. come on. it's not cute and endearing.#if ur looking for dragons bc of the cover. there are barely dragons. the one shows up in like the last chapter #also the audiobook narration is one of those where the normal narration is a normal voice but the dialogue is so cartoony?#like the girls have such high pitched voices.the boys have the deeper voice. except for like random side boys who have comical ones.#idk none of them sound like real people #things i did like: the magic i guess. though to be quite honest the colonisers metal based magic seemed more original and interesting asdhgf #i thought there were some interesting elements to the dudes backstory #oh another thing i disliked is theres a side character with a cleft lip and the MC brings it up EVERY TIME like like.....what.#every time she sees him shes like. ppl used to discriminate #against this and call them (a bunch of slurs) and say they're cursed but actually maybe it's just a scar. people used to call them slurs btw #. i am going to bring this up every time i look at them.

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galariangengar · 1 year ago

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💭

#this girl I was close friends/roommates with during my last year of college just got engaged with her bf of 8 years #while I am happy for both of them… idk I have difficult feelings about her now and don’t see her as a friend anymore #she used to live in the same city as me during the first like year and a half or so of the pandemic #and in that time we got to see/hang out with each other twice #first time we got to catch up for a few hours and we had a good time but it was kinda bittersweet… idk how to describe it #the second time she asked me last minute to accompany her to pick up stuff she got through Facebook marketplace #during one of those two times we hung out/she basically told me to my face that it would be the last time I’d see her #i understood initially cuz she was about to start teaching and she wanted to focus on her relationships with her bf and her family #but not long after she started teaching/she quickly started going out a lot and making new friends #then she moved to another town like 30 ish minutes away cuz her aunt kicked her out in the middle of her first year of teaching #idk I never had a good feeling about things cuz of all of that stuff I stated above #but also since she’s been trying on working to improve her relationship with her mom after everything she’s done to her #cuz we both have shitty moms who’ve said and done shitty things to us and our families #i know it probably won’t happen or won’t happen for like a few years #but in the event she invites me to her wedding/ I’m gonna be deadass with her about how I’ve felt about her #and see if she’s willing to work on improving our friendship before I decide to attend (if she does invite me cuz idk)#oh I also forgot how after she moved after her aunt kicked her out #she had the nerve to randomly ask if I could watch her aunt’s dogs during the week I was starting 3 online summer classes #she didn’t even like say hi/make small talk or ask nicely either #she just straight up was like ‘hey can you watch my aunt’s dogs during (x) week?’#she recently congratulated me when I posted on my Instagram story that I passed my driving text and got me license but I didn’t respond #I just have a lot of difficult feelings about her now/wish I could unfollow her but I don’t wanna start shit & her be all in my face & shit #jazz uses curse! 💜

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queen-scribbles · 2 years ago

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So fighting Hundred-Face last night went well. :)))))

#queen in mendev #ya know how in pillars of eternity pallegina was my ''OH FUCK i'm in trouble'' when she starts dying companion?#basically invincible and carried me through a lot of fights?#if she's dying we're probably gonna lose(damn lagufaeth >.>)?#yeah seelah and lann are that in wotr #so you can imagine how much internal screaming was happening when they BOTH hit orange😅#sosiel actually went down bc he kept failing the save against a spell effect and i couldn't get him to move out of its range #took three tries before woljif ACTUALLY turned off the one generator #and immediately after leaving blackwater i went and did weary guardian #where trinne had to 1v1 a lilitu for a couple minutes before everyone else caught up #most of her current spells are buffs/crowd control with a few damage things but the lilitu kept SAVING against those #so safe to say she and lann each scared the pants off each other inside a 24 hour period #just fun couple bonding things :)))

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radioactive-cloud · 27 days ago

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spent most of my day in the dark empty cold apartment because russians think it's a great idea to launch missiles and drones at power facilities alongside the regular people's houses they have as targets and my feeling-like-shit thing i have going on only intensified

#the power cuts are longer today as they probably will be the next few days and it kinda makes me want to claw at the walls of my room #i feel like a lonely sad caged animal who has nothing meaningful to do #but also i have things i need to do but i lack the motivation for it #aka my thesis which i'm putting off writing and try and fail to make some progress at each and every day #this is literally the worst and i hate this and i hate myself #and i've started reading the fic and it's just like two years ago and the time flies so fast it scares me #and i will be 22 soon and i don't want this because i have no idea what i'm doing in life and who i am and if there is a future at all #and i feel stuck in this body in this room in this apartment in this gray city with these thoughts running over and over in my mind #and i just want this to stop #the power is expected to be back in twenty minutes and then after two hours it will be gone again so this is great #and tomorrow it will probably be just the same fucking thing and i will hate every minute of it

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