#jewish bruce wayne

[frownyalfred]

actually I think the best characterization for old/older Bruce Wayne is just Overbearing Jewish Mother.

"Where are you?" "Why aren't you back from patrol yet?" "Alfred made dinner and you're not home." "You can't go out in the base layer armor, you'll be too cold." "I told you that you weren't going to stick that landing, and now look at you." "Don't whine to me when you break your ankle." "We're doing an x-ray on your ankle and that's non-negotiable." "What did I tell you about going after muggers on lower 9th? It never ends well." "Oh, you need a pickup on lower 9th? Who could've seen this coming?" "You never check your comm when you're talking to Barbara. What if something important came through?" "Why don't you bring Barbara around more?" "Alfred made extra dinner, please invite Barbara." "No I'm not using a cane, when I start using a cane you can take me out back and shoot me." "I'm not being dramatic. What's with that tone?" "Put that down. Why are you holding that?"

[aeturnum-mendacacium]

do you ever wonder if the JL pre-identity reveal wondered what nationality or religion Bruce was? Or wondered if he was part of a minority? And they were like too scared to offend him but every single time they were totally off on every theory-

Flash: dude what if he's like- chinese or something.

Hal: nah bro I think he's muslim, I realised that he never eats the foods which are haram

Flash: HAH??? FUCK REALLY?? I OFFERED PORK TO HIM YESTERDAY, NO WONDER HE SAID NO.DO YOU THINK HE HATES ME NOW??AM I GONNA DIE??

hal: I'll prepare your funeral :)

------------------------------

Bruce : * just generally doesn't like pork

[starryaugust]

I feel like the wayne household is one of the houses that the sitting on the corner superstition holds the most

Bruce, already 60 and married: *sitting in the corner of the table*

Literally all of his kids in the same time: *gasps*

Dick: Bruce get out of there, don't you want to get married before you're 70?

Bruce's spouse: ...

Bruce: *signs* I'm already married Dick

Damian, literally 12: *sits in the corner*

Staph: Damian what are you doing there? Don't you want to get married before you're old and withery?

The entire table: ...

Clark, visiting: *sits in the corner*

Dick: *actually tackling him so he wouldn't sit there*

The entire table: ...

Jason: *sits in the corner for the first time since he came back*

Tim, sadly: I guess we won't be invited to any weddings soon...

Jason: ????????

[morgangalaxy43]

He’s rich, he dresses like a bat, he bisexual, he’s autistic, he’s a father of six, he’s Jewish on his mom’s side, he has three awesome parents, he never got out of his emo phase, he’s total a loser and I love him

[transmasculinizing]

ik people dont see the appeal of letting bruce b anything but white bc "oh hes the product of rich white privilege" or whatever but listen. listen. the way he talks to his kids is so brown parent with undiagnosed autism level communication skills to me

[shewolf-sinclair]

batman is a very private person. duh.

brucie wayne isn’t as private. he’s actually very open, about certain things. like relationships and issues and people he supports as a public figure. but he still keeps personal things personal. the public only knows he’s jewish because he speaks about it when doing activist work against antisemitism in gotham. otherwise. you would never guess

bruce wayne isn’t usually very religious. he values his judaism but more so as a cultural background than a religion he doesn’t regularly go to synagogue, he doesn’t keep sabbath or keep kosher. BUT he absolutely sat shiva for jason. and i like to think that it was huge when jason found out after coming back. because he knows bruce stopped practicing years ago. he only practices on high holidays (and maybe passover). and he does chanukkah for the kids. so him taking the time to sit shiva for the whole week is a huge deal.

i like to think it was a huge jumping off point for them to start fixing things

[azaablue]

i think that jason vehemently insisted on having a bar mitzvah because he just assumed that dick had one and wanted to prove himself as a part of the family and bruce didn't think much of it so he was like 'sure' and it wasn't until a decade later that jason learns that dick never had one on the principle of wanting to be ungovernable and he never actually asked and bruce thought he knew

[dragon-lancelott]

the fact there isn't one jewish, nonbinary, autistic Bruce Wayne X jewish, genderfluid, adhd Hal Jordan fanfic is deeply upsetting 😔

[galaxymagitech]

Inspired by this post where Hal Jordan (who is canonically Jewish) can't help but notice Batman declining a donut on Yom Kippur...

I think it would be hilarious if Hal went into detective mode and it became A Thing.

Batman does frequently refuse pastries, so it takes a while, but eventually the evidence adds up to create A Theory. The Yiddish words Batman occasionally drops in his rants could just be a product of living in Gotham. Maybe he simply isn’t hungry on Yom Kippur. Perhaps he brings his own food during Passover in a spur of paranoia. But all of it, together?

Hal feels like a conspiracy theorist with a string board, because yeah, he feels like a jerk trying to figure out if someone is Jewish, but…he has to know. For the sake of just knowing. And also so he knows whether he should avoid scheduling monitor duty on Friday nights. (Batman’s never complained, but Batman doesn’t really seem the type to kvetch—that goes in the “not Jewish” evidence column).

Batman vetoes a proposal that they meet on the first night of Passover, citing “family matters.” When Diana proposes moving it to the second night, he cites “family matters” as well.

Hal sees Batman eating a cheeseburger. But everyone has different levels of observance, and fasting for Yom Kippur and eating kosher for Passover doesn't mean Batman always eats kosher...

Perhaps he's getting too attached to his idea. Hal theorizes that Batman is wearing a kippah under his cowl, and that’s why he uses a cowl instead of a mask. (Batman is not, in fact, wearing a kippah under his cowl. Hair clips could injure him if he’s hit in the head, and he was never raised to wear one as a kid.)

Eventually, after years of this, Batman brings latkes to the Justice League’s winter holiday party. He looks across the room, stares Hal right in the eyes, holds up a package of vegan cheese, and slowly places a slice on his burger. A chill travels down his spine.

Batman’s definitely seen his “evidence” list, hasn’t he?

[xxxjasontoddxxx]

In case you didn't know, most of the Wayne clan is Jewish.

Bruce and Tim go to synagogue, Dick comes home for the holidays (yes, all of them), and I get called home to light the menorah every Hanukkah.

Barbara, Steph, and Cass aren't Jewish but they do join us in celebration.

Alfred makes the best matzo ball soup, and no, I do not take criticism on that because it is a fact.

I don't know where Duke and Damian stand, but I assume Dami is agnostic at this point? I'll have that conversation with him later.

Anyway, this is just a long winded way of saying happy Passover!

To all my Jewish friends, I love you, and I wish you the best. Love and light, and all that. ✌🏻

[greenlandpissshark]

Ohh Batman is so moral ohh he can’t be with cat woman long term bc shell never stop being a criminal- he doesn’t care. I don’t think Bruce Wayne gives a shit about laws or criminality outside of the scope of justice. He would happily marry Selina unchanged and would delight in her robbing museums (which robbed the people’s who’s artifacts they boast). He gets off on Selina trying to steal from him. She gets off on him trying to stop her. They don’t hold hands in public they just take turns pick pocketing each other. Theyre two extreme rule breakers living on the fringes of society clinging to normality with the tips of their fingers breaking the law is just foreplay

[frownyalfred]

RIP Martha Wayne. As a Jewish mother you would have loved having Clark as a son in law because he’s never more than two seconds away, is always willing to help out around the house, and has 0 excuses for not visiting.

[sokoneedsagun]

Cold take: Damian and Bruce both have stick straight hair

Warm take: Damian has curly hair

Hot take: Bruce got curly hair from his mom and Damian got his fathers hair type not his mothers, so they both have curly hair with way too many cowlicks

[starryaugust]

What I think is the fav Jewish food of different batfam members because the Wayne household being a Jewish household is an hill I would die on

Alfred: Challah and rugelach

Bruce: kneidlach, blintzes and babka (more specifically his grandmother’s recipe)

Dick: Everything Chanukah

Barbara: Cholent, and couscous

Jason: Kugel yerushalmi, kubbe (the one’s who are in soup) and couscous

Cass: Couscous and mofletta

Tim: Kreplach and blintzes (more specifically with sweet cheese)

Steph: Hamantaschen and mofletta

Duke: Matzah brei, schnitzel and mofletta

Damian: Moroccan fish

[weirdnotal]

The bat kids don't deserve the bland whiteness that DC gives them, and as a mixed child who is often presumed as white, I would love to see DC explore this more honestly. Nothing has to change dramatically about their characters (except maybe some features)

[lizyarikus]

So I see a lot of discourse about Damian Wayne and whitewashing and.

Why the second that we start talking about Damian's genetics it's all "his gorgeous Arab-Chinese brown Roman nosed mother" and "his ENGLISH-NORTHWESTERN EUROPE father" and suddenly there are no mentions of Bruce's Jewish descent? We remember that it's an ethnicity, not just religion, right?

That boy has crooked noses on both sides of his ancestry. Depending on your headcanons, if not Bruce himself, then definitely someone from his family Martha definitely Martha had strong Ashkenazi curls.

Y'all treat Bruce like he's a pasty blond Norwegian with no recognizable ethnic traits to pass down. Which reads really weird next to detailed descriptions of Ra's racial presentation over the history of the character and whatever handful of facts we know about Melisande.