#james x barty x evan x regulus

[over-thetop]

no bc dont understand bc bartylus got together bc they were eachothers first everything bc pure blood circles and shit yk? but then reg had to sit down barty one day and be like "you know ur in love with evan right?" and once that whole debacle is over barty and reg would still occasionally hookup bc rosekiller had an open relationship but it got to the point where evan was like "whats all the fuss about?" and then both evan and barty fucked reg until he cried. and THEN jegulus got together and evan and barty turn up to regs one night but hes like "guys no im in a relationship we said we weren't doing this" but then JAMES calls them in and barty and james have a whole conversation in the space of a millisecond non verbally and then they! all! fuck! and the sex is SOOO good bc james is this super confident dom until reg and evan start whispering french in his ear and barty murmurs italian as he sucks james off and after that point he is so GONE and then yk who the dom is? evan. evan? evan. bc barty is WEAK for this man anyway but to hear him telling james and regulus what to do??? oh ho HO. comes there and then. and reg hearing someone mutter his own language in his ear as his long term boyfriend eats him out? gone. and james def has a voice/language kink

anyway yap over

Rosekiller having casual hookups with Regulus is actually my favourite dynamic between them

reg then gets with James and he joins them all oop

[regulusblock]

teen Regulus: what's an orgasm?

teen Barty: when you fold paper to make birds and shit

also teen Evan: that's oregano, bitch

[starchaser98]

"Not every ship has to be gay!"

Girl you're using TUMBLR. THE gayland. What did you expect?

[the-original-gays]

James was the mum friend in a "wraps you in a soft blanket and makes you tea when you're not feeling well" way.

Sirius needed someone to love him.

Remus needed someone to accept him.

Peter needed someone to value him.

And James made sure each of them went to bed smiling.

Regulus was the mum friend in a "chasing you around the house screaming at you to not put forks in the plug sockets" way.

Evan had no regard for safety, his own or others.

Barty has no impulse control.

Pandora did dangerous experiments on a daily basis.

Dorcas would do just about anything if you paid her enough.

And Regulus was just trying to keep those fucking idiots alive.

[moonyswarmsweaters]

Evan: why is Regulus crying?

Barty: well, James got drunk at a party so Regulus took him to their room

Barty: When he asked James to come to bed with him, James said “No, thanks. I’m sure you’re lovely but I have I boyfriend and I love him very very much” and went to sleep on the floor

Evan: so he’s crying because his boyfriend is too good?

Regulus: shut up you wouldn’t know about good boyfriends

Barty (said boyfriend): *Offended*

[sspadfoot]

The Marauders doing the trauma dumping sweet trend on TikTok

Sirius: My names Sirius and my parents used to torture me as a punishment until I had to run away and I brought haribos

Remus: My names Remus and when I was 5 I was bit by a werewolf because he hated my dad and I brought sour patch kids

Peter: My names Peter and I was tortured until I joined a fascist cult and I brought giant strawberries

James: My names James and my boyfriend broke up with my to join the cult because his parents told him to and I brought jolly ranchers

Regulus: My names Regulus and I’m that boyfriend. I also tried to drown myself on multiple occasions and I brought marshmallows

Barty: My names Barty and I was imperioed by my dad for most of my life, until I became crazy, and I brought twizzlers

Evan: My names Evan and I was forced by my parents to join a cult and I brought rainbow laces cause we’re all fruity

Pandora: My names Pandora and I can see the future so I saw all of my friends and family die and I brought skittles

Dorcas: My names Dorcas and my girlfriend was killed by one of my oldest friends and then I had to go face to face with the leader of the cult and I brought airheads

Lily: My names lily and my sister hated me for most of my life and I had a horrible toxic best friend who called me slurs and I brought nerds

Marlene: My names Marlene and I was killed by my best friend, my sister was also kidnapped and tortured and I brought Reeces

Mary: My names Mary and I was obliviated by my headteacher and I don’t remember why and I brought squashies

[pxrty-crxsher]

*power goes out*

Evan: Fucking shit, I can’t see anything

Barty: Don’t worry. I’ve got this covered.

Barty: *stomps feet*

Barty: *sketchers light up*

Barty: You’re welcome

[remuslupinlovebot]

marauders era p links (18+)

all links lead to p0rn !! watch at your own risk and do not watch in public

part 2 out now!

REGULUS BLACK

regulus fingering you in his dorm

regulus bouncing you on his cock

JAMES POTTER

riding james when he visits you for summer break

james celebrating a quidditch win

james absolutely devouring you as if you were his last meal on earth (this is the hottest video)

james teasing you while you’re wearing his hoodie

james stuffing you full and showing how much you mean to him

james eating his pretty girl out

SIRIUS BLACK

sirius making his girl feel good

showing sirius what a good girl you are

69’ing with sirius

sirius using his long fingers to make you cum

morning fucks with sirius

sirius fucking you at your house

REMUS LUPIN

remus fucking your face

remus fucking you in the bathroom before a full moon

riding professor lupin

getting extra credit with professor lupin

BARTY CROUCH JR

bouncing on bartys cock

barty fucking the LIFE out of you

MARLENE MCKINNON

marlene riding the life out of you

marlene making you look in the mirror as she destroys you

marlene fingering you till you’re shaking

making a sex tape with marlene

marlene eating you out

making out with marlene

LILY EVANS

fucking lily with a d!ldo

intimate but intense foreplay with lily

fucking lily in the common room

sucking mommy’s tits like a good girl

roommate lily helping you out

car sex with lily

thanking lily for date night by eating her out

lily sitting on your face <3

using mommy’s tits to cum

MARY MACDONALD

mary bringing you to heaven with her fingers

mary sending you a video while you’re on a work trip

home alone with mary

fucking mary after coming home to her all dolled up

making mary cum

eating mary out by the pool

DORCAS MEADOWES

eating dorcas out till she’s whimpering

(doesn’t really look like dorcas but it’s hot so whatever) devouring dorcas on the kitchen counter

giving dorcas special treatment after a night out

dorcas riding you

RANDOM

marlene eating lily out to give her a break from studying

pansy parkinson riding the genuine life out of you

pandora, dorcas and barty having fun when the dorms are empty

foreplay with lily and nb partner (not RLLY p0rṉ)

PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF ANY DON’T WORK!!

find part 2: here

[not-rab]

Pandora: The floor's lava!

James: *helping Regulus onto the table*

Barty: *kicks Evan off the sofa*

Dorcas: There are two types of boyfriends

[aludraslytherin]

Lily: Does anyone know why James and Regulus are sitting back to back holding hands?

Barty: They got in a pretty bad fight, Reg is mad at Potter.

Lily: Okay but why the hand holding then?

Remus: James got scared that Regulus doesn't love him anymore, so that's their solution until they calm down.

[fiasco95]

Regulus, Barty and Evan walking by, the couple sneering and glaring at the other two Marauders while Regulus doesn’t spare them a single glance.

James: Well if it isn’t Regulus Black and his ladies-in-waiting!

James: Regulus wants me so bad.

Peter: You’ve never even talked to him before!

James: Oh, I’ve talked to him, okay?

Peter:

James: …in my mind.

James: And let me tell you, in my mind….he wants me so bad.

[isabel-lillah]

when James and Reggie got together and James met Reg's friends he took one look at Barty and Evan and he just went god damn it not again

because the flashbacks to pre-relationship Sirius and Remus are hard and he does not want to go through that again

[icedcoffeebabyy]

Judge: do you swear to speak the truth and nothing but the truth.

James: I do.

Judge: what are your relations with regulus black.

James: omg dare.

[the-original-gays]

Dorcas: Wait, how do you know James is good in bed?

Evan: We share a dorm with Regulus, who regularly invites him over. So either James is amazing in bed...

Barty: Or Regulus just really likes to agree with him. Loudly. And a lot.

[moonyswarmsweaters]

James only ever thought of rethinking his relationship with Regulus once and it was the say he properly met Evan and Barty

not because they scared him or anything (they did, but it wasn’t the reason)

It was because Regulus said they weren’t dating and James wasn’t sure he could take another wolfstar level pre-dating pinning stage.

[yourgalgremlin]

Creep hitting on Regulus @ the bar:

GUY: What’s your body count, beautiful?

REG: That depends.

GUY: On what?

REG: Wether you’re asking how many guys I’ve “taken home” or how many I’ve taken out ☠️

REG (whispers): Both are higher than you’d think.

JAMES: …I want him in a way that’s concerning to my life expectancy.