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evermoreness · 2 days ago

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moonlight and mending pt.4 | remus lupin

pairing: remus lupin x reader

summary: remus is definitely getting comfortable around you.

obs: this is part four of a series. here's part one and part five.

masterlist

It wasn’t just the Marauders who noticed—it was everyone.

Something was different between you and Remus.

Maybe it was the way you gravitated toward each other like magnets, always ending up sitting together, walking together, talking in hushed voices in the library. Maybe it was the way you touched him, casual and warm—your hand brushing his arm when you laughed, your head leaning against his shoulder when you were tired.

Or maybe it was the way Remus—who had never been one for public affection—let you do all of it.

One afternoon, you were sitting outside in the courtyard with Lily and Marlene, flipping through a magazine Lily had brought from home. The sun was warm, and the three of you were giggling over some ridiculous article about how to “win the heart of a wizard.”

“Honestly, who writes this nonsense?” Marlene scoffed, shaking her head. “Step one: Laugh at all his jokes, even if they’re bad? What if he’s not funny?”

You laughed. “Then he’s not the one.”

Lily grinned. “You’re ruthless.”

“I have standards,” you said dramatically, flipping the page.

“Oi, are you lot gossiping again?”

You looked up just as Remus appeared, hands in his pockets, looking far too amused.

Marlene smirked. “Always.”

You smiled, immediately moving over so he could sit beside you. The second he did, you wrapped your arms around his waist in a quick hug, leaning your head against his shoulder.

“Hi, Rem.”

He huffed a laugh. “Hi.”

Lily and Marlene exchanged very obvious glances.

Remus was stiff for a millisecond—but then he relaxed, resting his arm behind you on the bench. He wasn’t much for this—for letting people be so openly affectionate with him—but with you… with you, he didn’t mind.

In fact, he liked it.

“So,” Lily said, giving you both a knowing look. “What exactly is going on between you two?”

You blinked. “What do you mean?”

Marlene grinned. “Oh, don’t play dumb. You’ve been practically attached at the hip.”

Remus sighed. “Not this again.”

Lily smirked. “It’s not just us. Everyone has noticed.”

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help smiling. “Maybe we just like each other’s company.”

Marlene raised an eyebrow. “Like each other’s company?”

Remus groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I am not having this conversation.”

Lily giggled. “You already are.”

You patted his knee playfully. “It’s okay, Rem, they’re just curious.”

He definitely blushed at the nickname—again—and Marlene definitely caught it.

“Ohhh, Rem?” she teased.

Lily gasped, clasping her hands together. “That’s adorable.”

Remus sighed in suffering. “Merlin, help me.”

You just laughed, leaning into him a little more. “It’s okay, Rem, I’ll protect you.”

He gave you a flat look. “You’re the cause of all this.”

You grinned. “Exactly.”

Lily and Marlene howled with laughter.

Lily was practically vibrating with excitement at this point. “Oh, this is too good,” she said, nudging Marlene. “James is going to lose his mind when he hears about this.”

Remus groaned, dragging a hand down his face. “For the love of Merlin, please don’t bring Prongs into this.”

“Oh, but I must,” Lily said with a mockingly serious expression. “It is my duty as his girlfriend to provide him with quality gossip.”

You giggled, nudging Remus with your shoulder. “It’s okay, Rem, you know James will just be happy you’re getting some attention.”

Marlene gasped dramatically. “She’s got a point! You are the most mysterious Marauder. It’s about time we figure out what’s going on inside that broody little head of yours.”

Remus sighed, looking to the sky like he was asking for divine intervention. “I don’t brood.”

You snorted. “You absolutely brood.”

“I think a better word would be ‘broodingly handsome,’” Marlene said with a teasing smirk.

Remus groaned. “Merlin’s beard.”

Lily clapped her hands together. “Okay, okay, but seriously. You two are always together, always sitting next to each other, always whispering about Merlin-knows-what—”

“Probably about books,” Marlene cut in.

Lily nodded. “Definitely about books. But that’s beside the point. Look at you two!” She gestured between you and Remus, who was still sitting rigidly beside you, looking like he wanted the ground to swallow him whole.

“I am looking,” Marlene said, tapping her chin. “And you know what I see?”

Remus tensed. “Please don’t say it.”

“A couple,” Marlene said smugly.

You laughed as Remus let out the longest, most dramatic exhale of his life. “We are not a couple!” he protested, clearly exasperated.

Marlene shrugged. “Sure, you aren’t.”

Lily grinned. “But you could be.”

Your heart skipped a beat at that, but you masked it with a playful smirk. “Are you two trying to set us up?”

“Oh, we wouldn’t have to if you two just admitted what’s already obvious,” Lily teased.

Remus scoffed. “Nothing is obvious.”

Lily and Marlene exchanged a glance before Marlene turned back to him, smirking. “Remus, darling, you literally let her cuddle you in public. And you don’t let anyone do that.”

“I—” Remus paused, his mouth opening and closing like he was searching for a good argument.

You just smiled up at him. “Do you mind when I do it?”

His gaze flicked to you, and in that moment, he looked completely thrown off. His lips parted slightly, his expression softening. “No,” he admitted, voice quieter now.

Marlene gasped, smacking Lily’s arm. “Did you hear that? He doesn’t mind.”

Lily grinned. “Oh, I heard it loud and clear.”

Remus groaned again. “Can we talk about something else?”

You giggled, deciding to take pity on him. “Alright, alright, we’ll stop.”

Marlene pouted. “But we were having so much fun.”

Lily nudged her. “We should probably give them a break. Poor Remus looks like he’s about to spontaneously combust.”

Remus sighed in relief. “Thank you.”

Lily leaned in with a smirk. “For now.”

He shot her a look, but she just grinned innocently.

You, on the other hand, couldn’t stop smiling. As much as Remus acted exasperated, you could feel the warmth in his body beside you, the way he didn’t pull away from you despite the teasing.

Maybe, just maybe, there was something there.

Later that afternoon, after Lily and Marlene had left—giggling and whispering conspiratorially, no doubt plotting more ways to tease him—Remus and you were left alone under the warm sunlight. The courtyard was quieter now, students either inside or spread out across the grounds. It was peaceful.

You, of course, took full advantage of the moment. You leaned your head on his shoulder, sighing happily. “Peace and quiet at last.”

Remus huffed a soft laugh. “For now.”

You tilted your head up to look at him, a teasing smile on your lips. “You act like you don’t secretly enjoy it when they tease you.”

He gave you a flat look. “I don’t.”

You grinned and, without thinking much, leaned forward to press a quick kiss to his cheek.

The moment your lips touched his skin, you felt him stiffen slightly, and when you pulled back, you caught the pink dusting his cheeks. He cleared his throat, looking anywhere but at you.

“You can’t just—” He exhaled. “Do that without warning.”

You tilted your head innocently. “Why not?”

“Because,” he muttered, rubbing the back of his neck, “it’s… unexpected.”

You smiled. “So I can do it as long as I warn you first?”

He blinked, processing, then groaned. “That’s not what I meant.”

You giggled, reaching for his hand. He didn’t pull away. If anything, he curled his fingers lightly around yours, tracing absentminded patterns against your skin. You swore you felt his thumb brush over your knuckles.

“I like this,” you murmured.

He glanced at your joined hands, then back at you. His lips twitched. “Yeah?”

You nodded. “You don’t mind?”

He exhaled, shaking his head. “No. I’m getting used to you, I think.”

You beamed. “Getting used to me?”

He smirked. “That’s what I said.”

You pretended to think. “Does that mean I can hold your hand whenever I want?”

He gave you a dry look, but his fingers didn’t move from yours. “I suppose.”

“And hug you whenever I want?”

A pause. Then, quieter, “Yes.”

Your heart did a little flip.

You leaned closer, lowering your voice to a playful whisper. “And steal a kiss on the cheek every now and then?”

His face turned red immediately. He groaned. “Why are you like this?”

You grinned. “You didn’t say no.”

Remus rolled his eyes but didn’t make any attempt to move away from you. In fact, he let his hand slip down from the bench to rest lightly on your back, his fingers tracing gentle patterns there.

You felt your heart melt at the gesture. He was getting more comfortable with you, letting himself enjoy these quiet, affectionate moments.

You reached for his hand, threading your fingers through his, playing with them absently. “You know,” you mused, “I really like being around you.”

Remus let out a breath, looking down at your joined hands. “Yeah?”

You nodded. “Mhm. You’re my favorite person.”

He scoffed, but you didn’t miss the way his grip on your hand tightened just slightly. “Now I know you’re lying.”

You gasped dramatically. “Remus Lupin, do you doubt my affections?”

He smirked. “I don’t doubt that you like annoying me.”

You pouted. “That’s just a bonus.”

Remus chuckled, shaking his head. “You really are something else.”

You beamed. “And yet, here you are, voluntarily spending time with me.”

He sighed, feigning exasperation. “Unfortunately.”

You gasped again, reaching out to shove him playfully.

Remus laughed, catching your wrist before you could retreat, holding your hand in his once more. His thumb brushed over your knuckles absentmindedly, his expression softening. “I do like having you around, though,” he admitted quietly. “Even if you are an absolute menace.”

Your heart skipped a beat at the tenderness in his voice. “You’re getting so soft, Rem,” you teased, nudging him.

He scoffed, rolling his eyes. “You’ll ruin my reputation if you keep saying things like that.”

You grinned. “Too late.”

Remus shook his head, but there was a fondness in his eyes as he looked at you. The castle grounds were quiet now, the sky streaked with the warm colors of sunset, and for the first time in a long time, he felt… peaceful.

And it was all because of you.

His soft spot.

And it wasn’t just in the courtyard.

It was everywhere.

In the Great Hall, when you’d sneak bits of food onto Remus’s plate because you knew he wouldn’t eat enough otherwise.

In the library, when he’d rest his chin on his hand and watch you take notes, a small, soft smile on his lips.

During patrols, when he was tired and quiet, and you’d loop your arm through his and walk beside him like it was the most natural thing in the world.

And maybe—just maybe—Remus was getting used to having you around.

Like how, when you both studied together, you’d casually lean your knee against his, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

Like how, whenever you greeted him, you’d rest a hand on his arm or tug gently at his sleeve to get his attention.

Remus wasn’t the type to ask for affection.

Not because he didn’t want it—Merlin, he wanted it—but because he never thought he deserved it.

But you? You gave it freely.

And every time you touched him—whether it was an absentminded brush of your fingers through his hair, the warm squeeze of your hand in his, or the way you hugged him without hesitation—he never let it slip away too quickly.

If he could make it last forever, he would.

And right at this moment, it was exactly what he was doing.

The library was quiet that afternoon, only the occasional soft murmur of students and the scratch of quills breaking the silence. Sunlight streamed through the tall windows, casting golden patterns across the wooden tables and shelves. The smell of parchment and ink mixed with the faint scent of dust—old books, well-worn and well-loved.

At one of the many study tables, you and Remus sat side by side, books spread out in front of you.

Well.

You were studying.

Remus? Not so much.

He had started with the intent to read, truly, but then you had very absentmindedly begun to run your fingers through his hair, and—well.

That was the end of that.

He had gone still at first, unsure if you even realized what you were doing. But then you did it again, lightly twirling a lock of his hair between your fingers before combing it back, and Merlin help him, his brain just shut off.

His book—Advanced Defense Against the Dark Arts—lay open in his lap, but he hadn’t absorbed a single word in the past five minutes.

Instead, he sat there, head slightly tilted toward you, absolutely enthralled by the feeling of your fingers threading through his hair.

He could get used to this.

(If he let himself, that was.)

You hummed softly, eyes scanning your own book as you gently tugged at a slightly tangled strand near the nape of his neck.

“Your hair’s getting long,” you mused, voice absentminded and warm.

Remus blinked, trying to pull himself out of his daze. “Mhm.”

You chuckled, still playing with his hair. “Should I stop?”

“No.”

The word left his mouth far too quickly. His eyes widened slightly, and he quickly cleared his throat. “I mean—uh—only if you want to.”

You smirked, closing your book and turning your attention fully to him. “So you do like it.”

Remus groaned, dragging a hand down his face. “I regret everything.”

“You should regret keeping this weakness hidden from me,” you teased, fingers resuming their lazy motions in his hair.

He grumbled something under his breath, which only made you grin.

“You’re like a cat, Rem,” you mused, thoroughly enjoying how flustered he looked.

Remus huffed. “I am not.”

You raised an eyebrow. “You’re literally leaning into it.”

He immediately straightened, sitting up stiffly. “No, I’m not.”

“Oh?” You let your hand drop from his hair completely.

Remus froze.

And then, to your complete amusement, he shifted ever so slightly toward you, as if expecting your hand to return.

You gasped dramatically. “You are a cat.”

Remus groaned, covering his face with his hands. “Shut up.”

You laughed, leaning into him just enough that your shoulder pressed against his. “It’s okay, Rem. I think it’s cute.”

He peeked at you through his fingers, eyes narrowed in suspicion. “…You’re mocking me.”

“Only a little.”

He rolled his eyes but didn’t move away.

Instead, after a long pause, he hesitated before mumbling, “You, uh… you can keep doing it. If you want.”

You bit back a smile, letting your fingers slip back into his hair.

“Thought you’d never ask.”

And if Remus spent the rest of the afternoon pretending to read while secretly basking in your touch…

Well.

That was between him and his book.

As the afternoon wore on, the quiet hum of the library surrounded you both. Remus had long given up on pretending to read, his book now serving as a convenient prop to cover his flushed face. His head tilted slightly toward you with each gentle motion of your fingers in his hair, and he couldn’t help the small, contented sigh that escaped his lips.

You, on the other hand, were completely aware of how much you were making him squirm, but you liked this side of him. The side that wasn’t so guarded, the side that didn’t try to hide how much he liked it. You found yourself smirking, amused by how easily you could get him flustered without even trying.

“So,” you said casually, breaking the silence. “What exactly did you think you were going to do in this library? Honestly, I thought you were here to study.”

Remus let out a small, embarrassed laugh, still not looking at you. “I was,” he muttered. “I had every intention to, but… I’m kind of distracted.”

You chuckled. “By me?”

He shifted uncomfortably, still not looking at you, though his shoulders were visibly relaxed. “Maybe,” he admitted. “You’ve got… you’ve got a way of making it hard to focus.”

You hummed thoughtfully, giving him a teasing look. “So I’m distracting, am I?”

Remus nodded, but it was almost as if he didn’t trust himself to say more.

You leaned in slightly, your voice turning more playful. “Well, I’m glad I can be of service.”

He turned his head just enough to meet your eyes, his own gaze full of warmth. “You’re always of service,” he said softly, as if the words just slipped out before he could stop them.

Your heart skipped a beat at the sincerity in his voice, and for a moment, the teasing atmosphere melted away. You kept your hand in his hair, now just running your fingers through it absentmindedly, unsure of what to say in response to such an unexpected confession.

After a long pause, you finally smiled, trying to keep things light again. “You know, if I keep doing this, you might start expecting it.”

Remus chuckled, his eyes softening as he looked at you. “Maybe I already do.”

That answer caught you off guard, and your breath hitched, your fingers faltering for a second. You weren’t expecting such a direct response, especially not from him. But the way he was looking at you—vulnerable, yet trusting—made your chest tighten with something that you couldn’t quite name.

You swallowed, forcing a smile. “Well, tough luck, Moony,” you teased, pulling your hand back to flip open your own textbook. “You’re just going to have to settle for me occasionally distracting you.”

Remus smiled, a hint of a mischievous glint in his eyes as he finally glanced down at his book, but his fingers reached out to brush against your own lightly. “I think I can handle that.”

For the rest of the time in the library, the two of you didn’t speak much. There was a comfort in the silence now—an unspoken understanding between you both that didn’t need to be voiced. You went back to your studying, and Remus tried, very half-heartedly, to focus on his own work, though the quiet moments of touch between you two lingered, unspoken, in the air.

Even without words, you both knew that something had shifted, that something between you had changed. It was subtle, small, but it was there. And in that moment, as you sat next to him in the stillness of the library, it felt like everything was perfectly in place.

Moony eyes.

At the Gryffindor common room, the boys and you were chatting. Sirius was sprawled on the sofa, while James and Peter were seated at the floor. Sharing a very small armchair, were you and Remus.

The boys have been teasing you for weeks now, and they certainly wouldn't stop. Maybe it was their own unique way to get both of you together.

"Merlin’s beard," Sirius groaned, dramatically leaning back against the couch. "Will you two just snog already and put the rest of us out of our misery?"

Remus choked on his own spit.

You blinked, heat rushing to your cheeks. "What?!"

James cackled, smacking the table. "He’s got a point, mate. You two have been making moony eyes at each other all dinner."

Peter snorted, laughing so hard he actually let himself lay on the floor. "Moony eyes—"

Remus, who was still recovering from nearly dying via choking, cleared his throat. "I have not been making ‘moony eyes.’"

Sirius smirked. “Oh, but you have, Moony. Don’t even try to deny it.”

James nodded enthusiastically. “You should see yourself, mate. Every time she talks, you stare at her like she hung the bloody stars.”

You felt your face heat up even more, sneaking a glance at Remus. His ears were red, and he looked absolutely scandalized.

“I do not,” he insisted.

Peter, ever the instigator, grinned. “Oh, you definitely do. It’s almost poetic, really.”

Sirius leaned forward, grinning mischievously. “And don’t think we haven’t noticed you two sneaking off to be alone. What do you do when you disappear together, hm?”

Remus groaned, covering his face with his hands. “Merlin, give me strength.”

You decided to join in on the teasing, turning to Remus with a playful smile. “Well, Rem, should we tell them?”

Remus peeked at you through his fingers, eyes narrowing. “Don’t you dare.”

That only made Sirius more interested. “Oh, now I need to know.”

James gasped dramatically. “Are you two secretly snogging? Is that what this is? Betrayal! I thought we were friends, Moony!”

You giggled, shaking your head. “No, we’re not snogging, James.”

“Not yet,” Sirius muttered under his breath.

Remus gave him a deadly glare. “Padfoot—”

Sirius grinned. “What? Just stating facts, mate.”

You smirked. “You lot are awfully invested in our nonexistent love life.”

James scoffed. “Oh, it’s very much existent. Just painfully slow.”

Peter nodded sagely. “At this rate, we’ll all be graduated before you two finally get together.”

Remus threw his head back in exasperation. “You are all insufferable.”

Sirius nudged him with his elbow. “Oh, come on, Moony, admit it. You fancy her.”

Remus groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “This is not how I pictured my evening going.”

James grinned, leaning forward with a glint of mischief in his eyes. "We’re just saying, you two might as well get it over with before we all go mad."

You rolled your eyes, trying to ignore the warmth creeping up your neck. "You lot are insufferable."

Sirius gasped, clutching his chest. "You wound me!"

Peter snickered. "Pretty sure Remus is the only one wounding himself—what with all the choking and blushing."

Remus scowled at them all. "I do not blush."

James pointed at him. "Your ears are bright red, mate."

Remus groaned, covering his ears with his hands.

You decided to fight fire with fire. You turned to Sirius, an innocent smile on your lips. "Alright, if we’re playing this game—when was the last time you went five minutes without flirting with someone, Black?"

Sirius smirked. "Oh, deflecting, are we?" He wagged a finger at you. "Classic move. But it won’t save you, darling."

James laughed, nudging him. "To be fair, he’s got you there. You are terrible at subtlety."

You crossed your arms, raising an eyebrow. "Oh, and you lot are subtle?"

"Of course," Peter said with a straight face. "We are the very definition of subtle."

James nodded solemnly. "Masters of it, really."

Sirius threw an arm over James’ shoulder. "Stealthy as shadows, my dear."

Remus exhaled sharply, dropping his hands from his face. "I hate every single one of you."

You grinned, nudging him playfully. "Even me?"

His expression softened immediately—traitorously. "Especially you," he muttered, though the slight curl of his lips gave him away.

Sirius groaned again. "See?! Look at that! You two are disgusting!"

James shook his head. "Unbelievable. Just snog already."

Remus groaned. “Merlin, just end me now.”

You, smiling brighter than ever, simply laced your fingers through his. He squeezed your hand, and though he was still flustered beyond belief, he didn’t let go.

Sirius gasped dramatically. “Oh, hand-holding! Scandalous!”

James pretended to faint.

Peter shook his head. “We’ve lost him to romance.”

Remus sighed, but there was a small, secret smile playing at his lips as he looked at you. “I really do hate them.”

You squeezed his hand, laughing softly. “I don’t know, I kind of love them.”

He exhaled, glancing at his friends—who were now reenacting some over-the-top, tragic love story in the middle of the common room.

He looked back at you, shaking his head fondly. “Yeah. Me too.”

Trying to protect you.

The change was subtle at first. Little things.

Remus stopped sitting so close to you, stopped letting his fingers brush against yours when you reached for something at the same time. He no longer rested his arm behind you on the couch or leaned into you when you laughed. The warmth you had grown used to—the easy comfort of having him near—was fading, like a candle slowly burning out.

At first, you thought you were imagining it. But then, he started avoiding you entirely.

You barely saw him at breakfast. He was quick to leave after class. When you sat beside him in the common room, he’d suddenly remember he had something to do—homework, patrols, an excuse that never quite made sense.

But the worst part? You didn’t change.

You were still as sweet as ever, still beaming up at him when you saw him in the hallways. Still sliding into the seat beside him in the common room, pressing a chocolate bar into his hand with a soft, “You look like you need this.”

You still reached for his hand when you laughed at something stupid Sirius said. Still looked at him with those bright, trusting eyes, like he wasn’t something to be afraid of.

It made him feel sick.

Because he didn’t deserve it. He didn’t deserve you.

And yet… he craved you.

Your touch. Your warmth. The way you made him feel like he was more than just scars and sharp edges.

But the full moon was too close now.

He could feel it—coiling in his gut, burning behind his ribs. It made him restless, short-tempered. His body ached, his appetite grew insatiable, his thoughts were muddled with something too sharp, too wild.

And you were still here, making everything harder.

One evening, after dinner, he was sitting in the common room, staring into the fire, trying to drown out the pounding in his head. You came in, looking as radiant as ever, your face lighting up the second you saw him.

“Rem!” you chirped, flopping onto the couch beside him without hesitation.

His jaw clenched. He didn’t turn to look at you.

Undeterred, you nudged his arm. “You okay? You’ve been quiet today.”

He swallowed hard. “Just tired.”

You hummed, unconvinced, but didn’t push. Instead, you leaned against him slightly, just enough for your shoulder to brush his.

“Wanna help me with my Potions essay?” you asked, your voice light. “Slughorn is going to hex me if I mess up another ingredient list.”

Remus should have said no. Should have told you to find Lily or James or anyone else.

But instead, he found himself glancing at you.

And Merlin, you were looking at him like he hung the bloody stars in the sky.

His throat felt tight.

“I—” He forced himself to look away, pushing a hand through his hair. “Yeah. Sure.”

Your smile was blinding, and something inside his chest ached.

He was being so selfish.

Letting you sit so close. Letting you touch him. Letting himself want you when he knew what was going to happen in just a few days.

But he wasn’t strong enough to pull away.

Not yet.

You didn’t seem to notice how stiff he was, or if you did, you didn’t mention it. Instead, you just grinned, pulling out your Potions book and parchment as if nothing had changed. As if he wasn’t trying to put distance between you.

Remus hated it.

Hated how easy it was for you to sit beside him, to nudge his knee with yours like you always did. Hated how much he liked it.

You were making this impossible.

“Okay,” you sighed, flipping through the pages. “Tell me why I always forget the difference between powdered root of asphodel and essence of dittany.”

Remus huffed a quiet laugh despite himself. “Because you have the attention span of a flobberworm.”

You gasped dramatically. “Rude.”

The corners of his mouth twitched. Stop it.

He cleared his throat, forcing himself back into the walls he’d been building around you. “Powdered root of asphodel is a sleeping agent,” he muttered, shifting away slightly. “Essence of dittany is for healing.”

You pursed your lips, scribbling it down on your parchment. “See? This is why I keep you around.”

A warmth spread through his chest before he could shove it down.

You always said things like that so easily, like it was the most natural thing in the world for him to be in your life. Like you didn’t realize how dangerous it was to be near him.

He should have ignored it. Should have let the moment pass.

But when he glanced at you, you were already looking at him—chin propped in your hand, eyes soft and full of something he didn’t deserve.

He swallowed hard. “Don’t look at me like that.”

You blinked, surprised. “Like what?”

Like I’m worth something.

Instead of answering, he shook his head, looking back at your parchment. “Just… keep writing.”

You didn’t press him. You never did.

You just smiled a little, amused, and got back to your notes.

And Remus felt his resolve crumbling.

Because the full moon was closing in, and he was supposed to be pushing you away.

But you weren’t letting him.

And deep down, he knew—no matter how hard he tried—he didn’t want you to.

Someone who stays.

Now Remus was fully avoiding you.

At first, it was subtle—excuses about needing to study, leaving the Great Hall earlier than usual, disappearing between classes. But then, it became obvious. He stopped waiting for you after class. He no longer sought you out in the courtyard or library. He barely spoke to you.

And you weren’t having it.

So, when he slipped out of the Great Hall after barely touching his food, you followed.

Remus walked with his hands shoved in his pockets, head down, as he made his way toward the Astronomy Tower. You didn’t even hesitate to chase after him.

"Remus!"

He froze for a fraction of a second before continuing up the stairs.

You huffed, quickening your pace. “You are aware that ignoring me won’t actually make me go away, right?”

Remus exhaled through his nose. “I’m not ignoring you.”

“You are,” you countered, finally reaching his side. “You’ve been running off at every opportunity like I’m some horrible curse you need to escape from.”

He swallowed, still refusing to look at you.

"Rem," you tried softly.

His shoulders tensed.

You stepped in front of him, blocking his way. “Talk to me.”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” he muttered, glancing toward the night sky.

You frowned. “You’re isolating yourself, and don’t you dare tell me you always do this, because we both know that’s a lie.”

Remus exhaled, jaw clenched. “Maybe you should stop worrying about me.”

You recoiled slightly, but quickly narrowed your eyes. “Like hell I will.”

Remus rubbed a hand over his face. “You’re making this harder than it needs to be.”

“Good,” you snapped. “You’re pushing me away, and I don’t know why.”

His lips pressed into a thin line. “You should.”

Your chest tightened. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means—” Remus cut himself off, shaking his head. “You know something’s wrong. You know I’m not—” He inhaled sharply. “I just— I need you to stop.”

You blinked. “Stop what?”

Remus let out a humorless laugh. “Caring.”

Your stomach twisted.

“Because if you keep caring,” he said, voice hoarse, “you’re going to get hurt.”

You stared at him, heart pounding. “Remus…”

“I can’t—I won’t let that happen.”

You shook your head, stepping closer. “You don’t get to decide that.”

He clenched his fists. “I do.”

“No, you don’t,” you shot back. “Because I choose to care about you. I choose to be here.”

His expression faltered, pain flickering in his eyes.

You exhaled, voice softer. “Rem… why won’t you just let me be here for you?”

He turned away. “Because one day, you’ll hate me for it.”

Your heart ached.

“I could never hate you,” you whispered.

Remus squeezed his eyes shut. “You say that now.”

You took a deep breath, then—without hesitation—wrapped your arms around him.

Remus stiffened.

But you didn’t let go.

You held him tighter, pressing your forehead against his shoulder. “I’m not going anywhere.”

His hands trembled at his sides. “You should.”

“I won’t.”

He let out a shaky breath.

And slowly—so slowly—you felt his arms wrap around you, his grip hesitant, as if he was afraid you’d vanish the moment he touched you.

But you didn’t.

And neither did he.

Remus held you like he was afraid you’d slip through his fingers. His grip wasn’t tight, wasn’t desperate, but it was cautious—like he wasn’t sure if he deserved this moment.

You weren’t having that.

You tightened your arms around him, pressing closer, feeling the steady rise and fall of his chest. His heartbeat was fast, too fast. You didn’t know if it was from nerves or something else entirely, but you didn’t care. You just wanted him to know—really know—that you weren’t leaving.

His fingers twitched against your back. “You don’t understand.”

“Then help me understand,” you murmured.

He shook his head against you. “I can’t.”

You exhaled, running a soothing hand up and down his back. “Then I’ll wait.”

Remus stiffened. “You shouldn’t.”

You pulled back just enough to look at him, your arms still around him, refusing to let go. His face was guarded, carefully blank, but his eyes—those soft brown eyes—were filled with emotion.

“Why not?” you whispered.

His jaw tightened. “Because I’m not worth waiting for.”

Your heart ached. “That’s not your decision to make.”

He looked away, his grip on you loosening, but you refused to let him slip away.

“Remus.” You gently cupped his face, forcing him to look at you. His skin was cool beneath your fingertips, and he tensed under your touch. “You don’t get to decide what you’re worth to me. And right now? Right now, I’m telling you that you’re worth everything.”

His breath hitched.

“You don’t have to tell me anything you’re not ready to,” you continued softly. “You don’t have to explain why you disappear every month, or why you come back looking like you fought the bloody Whomping Willow. You don’t have to tell me why you think pushing me away will keep me safe.” You swallowed, thumb brushing against his cheek. “But just because you won’t tell me, doesn’t mean I don’t see you, Rem.”

His fingers curled into the fabric of your robes.

“I see you,” you whispered. “And I’m not afraid.”

Remus let out a shaky breath. He looked so tired, so torn. And yet, for the first time in days, he wasn’t running.

You watched as his resolve cracked—just slightly, just enough. His shoulders sagged, and before you knew it, he buried his face in the crook of your neck.

Your heart clenched as you felt his breath against your skin, uneven and vulnerable. You rubbed soothing circles into his back, holding him close, grounding him.

“Is it really so impossible to believe,” you murmured, “that someone could stay?”

Remus let out a bitter laugh. “For me? Yes.”

You frowned, tightening your grip around him. “Then I’ll just have to prove you wrong.”

He let out a soft, shaky exhale. His arms wrapped around you fully this time, holding on like he was finally allowing himself to believe—even if just for a moment—that maybe, just maybe, you meant it.

And you did.

You always would.

—— 🌙 ——

Notes from the author:

Hello my favourite people!

Made extra fluff for you, our Moony deserves some love! (Even though he doesn't admit it)

Also, did you notice that the reader, who always does amazing in potions, is asking his help with it? 🫢

And thanks for all the amazing comments, you have me smiling like a fool! 🤍

Hope you like this part as much as i did! (Probably is my favourite till now)

See you soon!

Taglist: @iloveremmy @jjamjamie @breakawayfromeveryday @oursweetmoony @whimsical-mistakes @froggiedragon @deathmybride @nerdbirdsworld @wolfstarsprongs @mischievousmoony @httpvomitello @sophie-0012 @waitforiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit @msfandomsblog @starofthedawn @malenk @diiyaa @theonyxstate (if you want to be included in the taglist, let me know!)

#harry potter #fanfic #marauders era #x reader #x yn #marauders #remus lupin #sirius black #james potter #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x reader #lily evans #lily and james

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evermoreness · 1 day ago

Text

moonlight and mending pt. 5 | remus lupin

pairing: remus lupin x reader

summary: remus still thinks he doesn't deserve love, but you like to prove him otherwise.

obs: this is part five of a series. here's part one and part six

masterlist

Days passed, and things between you and Remus settled back into something almost normal.

Almost.

He stopped pulling away. Stopped dodging you in the corridors. Stopped making excuses to avoid being alone with you. But there was something different now—something unspoken in the way he clung to you, like he was memorizing every moment, every piece of you, before you inevitably disappeared.

You weren’t going anywhere.

But he didn’t believe that.

At meals, he sat closer to you, shoulders brushing, as if seeking warmth he couldn’t ask for.

During walks in the courtyard, his fingers would graze against yours, hesitant, like he wanted to hold your hand but didn’t dare.

Even in the common room, he’d sit beside you on the couch, and when you eventually dozed off against his shoulder, he never moved—never dared disturb the comfort of having you there.

You noticed it all.

And it broke your heart.

One evening, you sat together in the Gryffindor common room, the fire crackling beside you. The Marauders were off somewhere, probably causing trouble, which left just the two of you.

Remus had a book open in his lap, but he wasn’t reading. Instead, his head was resting against the back of the couch, eyes closed, looking exhausted.

You hesitated for only a moment before shifting closer, resting your head on his shoulder.

His breath hitched.

“Is this okay?” you murmured.

He exhaled shakily. “Yeah. More than okay.”

Silence stretched between you, the warmth of the fire wrapping around you both. After a while, you felt him shift slightly. Then, ever so slowly, he let his head rest against yours.

You smiled softly. “You seem tired, Rem.”

He let out a quiet chuckle. “That obvious, huh?”

You hummed. “Want to talk about it?”

He hesitated. “Not really.”

“Alright,” you said simply, no pressure, no expectations.

He exhaled, and for a moment, you swore you felt his fingers twitch beside yours. Like he wanted to hold on but didn’t know if he could.

So you took the decision from him.

You reached down, lacing your fingers with his.

Remus froze.

For a moment, you thought he might pull away. But instead, he squeezed your hand—just barely—and let out a shaky breath, like something inside him had just unraveled.

“Is this okay?” you asked again, voice barely above a whisper.

He swallowed. “Yeah.”

And this time, his voice didn’t shake.

"Long day?" You asked lightly.

He scoffed. "Something like that."

"You’re warm," you murmured, squeezing his hand gently.

He swallowed thickly. "That happens."

You didn’t ask why.

The fire flickered beside you, casting soft, golden light over the common room. Your hand was still wrapped in Remus’s, his fingers curling tightly around yours like he was afraid to let go.

You could feel the tension radiating off him, though. Something deeper than exhaustion. Something restless.

You glanced up at him. His eyes were closed again, his jaw tight, a muscle in his cheek twitching ever so slightly. His breathing was uneven—too shallow, too controlled.

“You sure you don’t want to talk about it?” you asked again, squeezing his hand gently.

He hesitated. “It’s nothing,” he muttered.

You huffed. “Remus, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you look this exhausted.”

“I’m fine.”

You gave him a flat look. “Right. And I’m the Minister of Magic.”

That got a small huff of laughter from him, but it was brief. His grip on your hand tightened for just a second before he loosened it again, like he was afraid of holding on too much.

You shifted a little closer, letting your free hand rest against his arm. “I don’t like seeing you like this, Rem.”

He swallowed thickly. “I’m just—” He cut himself off with a sigh, shaking his head. “It’s just a rough week. I’ll be fine.”

You didn’t miss the way he avoided looking at you when he said it.

You studied him carefully, taking in every little detail. His skin looked paler than usual, a bit drawn, as if he hadn’t slept properly in days. His hands—one still loosely holding yours—were cold, his fingers a little shaky. And his eyes… when he finally did glance at you, there was something off in them. Something stormy, like he was barely holding himself together.

Your heart clenched.

You had no idea what was going on with him, but you hated seeing him like this.

You chewed on your lip, debating whether to push further. But before you could, Remus let out a sharp breath, shifting uncomfortably.

Then, suddenly, he pulled his hand from yours and scrubbed it down his face, exhaling harshly.

“I—I’m sorry,” he murmured. “I didn’t mean to—”

“Hey.” You sat up a little straighter, concern flooding you. “Remus, it’s okay.”

He clenched his jaw, looking frustrated with himself. “I just feel… on edge. I don’t know. It’s—it’s stupid.”

You frowned. “It’s not stupid.”

He didn’t say anything, just stared at the fire, his hands gripping the hem of his sweater so tightly his knuckles turned white.

You hesitated for a moment before gently reaching out again, resting your hand over his.

His shoulders tensed—but he didn’t pull away.

“Is there anything I can do?” you asked softly.

He let out a slow breath. “You’re already doing it.”

Your heart ached at the quiet confession.

You gave his hand another squeeze. “Are you sure you don’t want to tell me what’s going on?”

He hesitated—longer this time. Then, with a sigh, he finally muttered, “It’s just… been a long week.”

You weren’t convinced.

But you could see how hard this was for him—how much he clearly wanted to talk but didn’t know how.

So instead of pushing, you just nodded. “Okay.”

Remus blinked, as if surprised you weren’t going to interrogate him. “Okay?”

You smiled softly. “Yeah. But just so you know… whenever you do feel like talking about it, I’m here.”

His expression softened in a way that made your chest feel tight.

Then, before you could register what was happening, he reached out and pulled you into a hug.

It wasn’t like the casual, half-hearted hugs you sometimes exchanged with your friends. This one was tight. Desperate. Like he needed to feel you there, real and warm and solid.

You barely had time to react before you found yourself wrapping your arms around him in return, holding him just as tightly.

“You’re being too good to me,” he murmured against your hair.

You smiled. “Someone has to be.”

He let out a quiet, breathy chuckle. “Merlin help me.”

You grinned but didn’t pull away, letting the warmth of the moment settle between you.

This time, when you leaned against him, he didn’t tense.

And this time, when your head rested against his shoulder, he let himself relax.

“You know,” you murmured, tilting your head slightly so you could see his face, “I think you like my company.”

Remus let out a soft chuckle. “That’s debatable.”

“Oh, really?”

“Mm.”

“Then why are you still here?”

His lips twitched. “Trapped.”

You gasped dramatically. “Trapped? Trapped? Remus, you could leave at any time—”

“Mm, could I?”

“Yes! You literally have legs.”

“But then you’d be sad,” he teased.

You huffed. “So you’re staying to make me happy?”

“Apparently so.”

You grinned. “Admit it. You like me, Lupin.”

He scoffed, but his ears turned pink. “I tolerate you.”

You let out a dramatic sigh, placing a hand on your heart. “That’s practically a love confession.”

Remus shook his head, but he didn’t push you away when you snuggled closer, curling into his warmth.

The fire crackled beside you, the castle silent around you, and for the first time in a long time, Remus didn’t feel the weight of the approaching full moon pressing so hard on his chest.

He finally let out a breathy chuckle, shaking his head. "You're ridiculous."

"And you're a liar," you shot back, nudging his shoulder.

Remus smirked, but there was a flicker of warmth in his eyes now—something lighter, something more himself. It made your heart flip a little.

You nudged him again, this time just because you liked seeing the ghost of a smile on his lips. "Come on, tell me the truth. I’m like, your favorite person ever, aren’t I?"

He huffed. "Don’t be absurd. I’d never admit to such a thing."

"You just did."

"I did not."

"You didn't deny it."

He pressed his lips together, trying not to smile.

You smirked. "Ha! Caught you."

"Merlin, you are insufferable."

"And yet, here you are, spending all your time with me. Makes you wonder, doesn’t it?"

Remus sighed dramatically, rubbing a hand down his face. "What have I done to deserve this?"

You grinned. "I ask myself the same question every day."

He shook his head, exhaling a laugh. "Unbelievable."

For a moment, you just sat there, the fire crackling beside you, the tension from before now fully melted away. You liked this—this version of Remus. The one who let himself tease back, who let himself laugh.

It made you wonder why he didn’t let himself be like this more often.

"You know," you said, leaning in slightly, lowering your voice to a whisper as if you were sharing a deep secret. "You’re actually pretty fun when you’re not brooding."

Remus scoffed. "I do not brood."

You wiggled your fingers dramatically. "Ooooh, look at me, I’m Remus Lupin. I read books and sigh dramatically by the fire and never tell anyone what’s bothering me because I like to be mysterious."

Remus stared at you, deadpan. "...That is an appalling impression of me."

You grinned. "I thought it was spot-on."

He gave you a look, but the way his lips twitched betrayed his amusement.

"Alright then," he said, turning slightly to face you fully. "If we’re doing terrible impressions—"

"Mine was fantastic, thank you very much."

"—then let me try yours."

Your eyes widened. "Oh no."

Remus cleared his throat, straightening up dramatically. Then, in the worst high-pitched voice you’d ever heard, he said, "Oh, Remus, tell me what’s wrong! Oh, Remus, am I your favorite person ever? Oh, Remus, please let me annoy you until you’re forced to smile!"

Your jaw dropped. "Excuse me?!"

Remus smirked, looking far too pleased with himself. "Seemed pretty accurate to me."

"You wish I sounded that annoying."

"Oh, I know you do."

You gasped, shoving his shoulder. "Take it back!"

"Never."

"Remus John Lupin, take it back!"

He laughed, actually laughed, and you were so caught off guard by the sound of it—so light, so unburdened—that you just stopped, staring at him.

He caught your expression and tilted his head. "...What?"

You smiled softly. "I like it when you laugh."

That caught him off guard.

For a moment, the teasing air between you stilled, something softer settling in its place. His cheeks flushed slightly, and he looked away, rubbing the back of his neck.

"You make it easy," he muttered.

Your heart skipped.

But before you could respond, he cleared his throat and stood up abruptly, brushing imaginary dust off his sweater. "Anyway. I should probably head to bed before you tackle me for insulting you again."

You snorted, standing up beside him. "You deserved it."

He chuckled, shaking his head. "Merlin help me."

"Admit it," you teased, bumping his shoulder again. "You’d be bored without me."

There was something in the way he looked at you then—something quiet and unreadable, but warm. His gaze flickered between your eyes, as if he was trying to memorize the moment, as if he was thinking something he wasn’t quite ready to say.

You noticed the shift, felt it settle between you like an unspoken question. Your breath hitched slightly, but you didn’t look away.

As you both started toward the dormitories, you bumped your shoulder against his. He bumped you back.

And for the first time in a long time, Remus didn’t feel quite so heavy.

For now, you wouldn’t push.

But you would be here when he was ready.

Still, neither of you moved.

It was a strange thing—this almost between you. Like something was there, just waiting for the right moment to be acknowledged. But for now, you let it be, let it settle in the comfortable silence between you.

Finally, with a small, hesitant smile, you reached out and gave his sleeve a little tug. "Goodnight, Remus."

He swallowed, nodding. "Goodnight."

And as you turned to head toward your own dormitory, Remus stood there for a moment longer, watching you go, the ghost of a smile still lingering on his lips.

Hiding the truth

Remus knew this wouldn’t last.

Knew that one day—soon—you’d figure it out. You’d realize what he was. You’d put the pieces together and see him for what he truly was.

And then you’d leave.

Everyone always left.

So he held on while he still could.

He held on like a man savoring his last moments of sunlight before the night swallowed him whole.

He just prayed that when the time came—when you finally knew the truth—this warmth wouldn’t turn cold.

The days passed in a blur of stolen moments, hushed whispers in the library, and the soft, lingering touches that neither of you spoke about. But beneath it all, something heavier loomed—something unspoken but ever-present.

You knew.

You had spent countless hours pouring over books, analyzing every symptom, every pattern. The answer had been staring at you for days, and now, there was no doubt in your mind. Remus was a werewolf.

And yet, you remained silent.

Not because you were afraid, not because you didn’t want to know for sure, but because he was afraid. You could see it in the way he looked at you sometimes, like he was preparing himself for the day you might turn your back on him. So you wouldn’t push. You would wait. You would be his safe space, for as long as he let you.

Meanwhile, Remus was struggling.

Sirius, James, and Peter had cornered him in the Gryffindor common room late one night, long after most of the students had gone to bed. James was leaning against the fireplace with his arms crossed, Sirius was sprawled on the couch, and Peter was sitting on the armrest, watching him closely.

“You have to tell her,” James said, his voice firm. “She deserves to hear it from you.”

Remus ran a hand down his face, sighing. “I can’t.”

It wasn’t the first time they’d had this conversation.

“Moony,” James started, voice even but firm, “you have to tell her.”

Remus exhaled sharply through his nose. “I can’t, James.”

Sirius rolled his eyes, throwing his hands up. “Why the hell not?”

“Because she’ll leave!” Remus snapped, suddenly sitting up. His voice was harsher than he intended, but he didn’t care. His heart was pounding. “She’s not you lot. She’s not bound to me by some stupid loyalty pact we made when we were twelve. She has no reason to stay once she knows what I am.”

Sirius frowned. “Moony—”

“No, don’t Moony me,” Remus said bitterly. “You think I haven’t thought about this? You think I don’t want to tell her? Of course, I do! But what happens when she finally realizes what I am? That I’m dangerous? That I could hurt her?”

James shook his head. “You wouldn’t hurt her.”

“You don’t know that.”

Sirius leaned forward. “Neither do you.”

Remus clenched his jaw, looking away.

Peter shifted uncomfortably. “Remus… we didn’t run when we found out. What makes you think she will?”

“Because it’s different!” Remus burst out, standing abruptly. His hands curled into fists at his sides, chest rising and falling unevenly. “You’re my friends. You made a choice to stick by me, even though you shouldn’t have. But her? She doesn’t have to stay.” He swallowed hard. “And she won’t.”

A heavy silence settled over the group.

Sirius sat up properly, watching Remus closely. “Moony… you really think she doesn’t care enough about you to stay?”

Remus turned away from them, staring into the fire. His throat felt tight.

“She likes you,” Peter added gently. “More than likes you, actually. Anyone with eyes can see it.”

James stepped closer. “We’re not saying you have to tell her right this second. But, mate… she’s going to find out. And wouldn’t you rather it be from you?”

Remus let out a slow, shaky breath. He knew that. He had always known that.

But the idea of losing her—of seeing the look of fear on her face, of watching her walk away—was enough to paralyze him.

“I can’t,” he murmured, voice barely above a whisper.

Remus swallowed hard, looking down at his hands.

Sirius sat up straighter, his usual smirk replaced with something softer. “Moony… mate. You’re not going to lose her. She likes you.”

Remus let out a dry laugh. “She doesn’t know me.”

Peter frowned. “Yes, she does.”

“Not this part,” Remus shot back. “Not the part that matters.”

James sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “You’re making this into something bigger than it is.”

“Bigger than it is?” Remus snapped, his voice suddenly sharp. “It’s not your life, James. It’s mine. And if she runs, if she looks at me like I’m some kind of monster, I don’t—” He exhaled shakily. “I don’t think I could handle that.”

A heavy silence settled between them.

Sirius was the first to break it. “You really love her, don’t you?”

Remus looked away, jaw tight. He didn’t answer. He didn’t have to.

James let out a slow breath. “Then you really have to tell her.”

Remus squeezed his eyes shut, as if the thought itself was painful. “Not yet,” he whispered. “Not yet.”

Peace offering.

Three nights before the full moon, he was at his worst.

Everything hurt. His skin felt like it was burning, every muscle in his body was tense, and his head was throbbing with the pressure of the impending transformation.

He was irritable, short-tempered, and doing his best to avoid her.

But of course, you wouldn’t let him.

You found him in the library, hiding between the rows of bookshelves, slumped in a chair with his head in his hands.

You sat down across from him, placing something on the table.

He didn’t look up until you nudged it toward him.

It was a chocolate bar.

He blinked at it, then at you. "What’s this?"

You grinned. "A peace offering."

He huffed. "I haven’t done anything to need a peace offering."

You arched an eyebrow. "You haven’t, but the full moon has."

His heart clenched.

You didn’t say it, but you knew.

Maybe you’d always known.

And yet, you were still here.

Still offering him chocolate.

Still looking at him like he was worth something.

He swallowed past the lump in his throat, fingers tightening around the chocolate bar.

"You’re impossible," he muttered.

You beamed. "So I’ve been told."

And for the first time in days, he smiled.

The realization.

The wind was sharp that afternoon, carrying the scent of damp grass and the distant crackling of autumn leaves. Remus sat by the lake, arms resting on his bent knees, staring blankly at the water. His fingers tugged at the frayed ends of his sweater sleeves—his body was tight with exhaustion, his head heavy with an ache that no amount of rest could fix.

Everything was too much. The sounds of students laughing nearby grated on his nerves, the sunlight filtering through the trees was too bright, and his own thoughts wouldn’t stop.

And then—

Footsteps.

Soft but deliberate.

He sighed through his nose. "You really don’t have to follow me everywhere, you know."

You didn’t even hesitate before plopping down beside him, your legs tucked beneath you. "I know."

Silence.

Remus clenched his jaw. He didn’t have the energy for this, didn’t have the patience to keep pretending he was fine. He just needed to be alone. But he didn’t tell you to leave.

Because—Merlin help him—he didn’t want you to.

You pulled your cloak tighter around yourself, watching the rippling water with him. For a while, neither of you spoke. The world buzzed around you, but it felt like you were in your own bubble of quiet.

Then, as if sensing he wasn’t going to contribute to the conversation, you started talking.

"Today was exhausting," you sighed, stretching your arms above your head. "Madam Pomfrey had me reorganize all the potions in the hospital wing, and I swear she enjoys watching me suffer."

Remus didn’t respond, but you kept going.

"And then Lily forced me to help her with Charms homework—" you gasped dramatically. "Rem, she lectured me about pronunciation for twenty minutes. I was being held hostage in my own dorm."

He huffed out something that was almost a laugh.

You grinned, encouraged. "Oh, and don’t get me started on Sirius. I caught him sneaking into the kitchens again. He tried to tell me he was just getting tea, but the idiot had chocolate all over his mouth."

Remus exhaled through his nose, his lips twitching.

You were determined, he’d give you that.

And then—warmth.

Your hand, brushing against his.

Not demanding, not forcing him to hold it—just there. A reminder.

His muscles tensed for a split second, but then—he relaxed. Just slightly.

Your fingers curled around his, slow and steady, as if giving him the chance to pull away.

He didn’t.

And something in him unraveled.

The weight pressing against his ribs, the tightness in his chest—it eased. Not completely, but enough that he could breathe.

You kept talking, your voice soft now. "I swear, if I hear Lily say ‘swish and flick’ one more time, I might actually lose my mind."

Remus tilted his head slightly, looking at you for the first time. You were watching the lake, the light breeze playing with your hair, your fingers still curled around his like it was the most natural thing in the world.

And that’s when it hit him.

You were becoming the most important person in his life.

The realization nearly knocked the breath out of him.

He had spent so much time pushing—so much time terrified that if he let someone in, they’d eventually run. That they’d see what he really was and leave like it was nothing.

But you weren’t leaving.

Even when he ignored you, even when he was snappy and distant, even when he did everything in his power to keep you away—you stayed.

And Merlin, that scared him more than anything.

Because he wasn’t sure he could handle losing you.

He swallowed hard, squeezing your fingers just slightly.

"Thank you," he murmured, so low it was almost lost in the wind.

You turned your head toward him, your expression soft. "For what?"

He met your eyes, something raw flickering in his own. He shook his head. "Just... thank you."

And you didn’t push, didn’t demand more from him.

You just squeezed his hand back.

Telling the truth.

Remus knew what awaited him.

The full moon loomed over him like a shadow, and he could already feel the dull ache creeping into his bones, the exhaustion pooling behind his eyes. His skin felt too tight, his thoughts too loud. He had done this so many times before—prepared himself for the pain, for the inevitable breaking and tearing of his body.

But this time was different.

Because this time, when he came back, you would be there.

And it wouldn’t be the first time.

It would be the third.

He had run out of excuses.

He knew it.

And so did you.

You had never believed him when he told you he fell down the stairs. Or when he said he got into a fight with the Whomping Willow. Or when he muttered some half-hearted excuse about an unfortunate accident in Potions.

You had never believed him.

But you had never pushed him either.

You were waiting.

Waiting for him to say it.

And tonight, he would.

Because he couldn’t keep doing this. Not to you. Not to himself.

So he found you, as he always did, sitting in the common room, curled up in the corner of the couch by the fire, a book in your lap but barely paying attention to it.

When he stepped into the room, your head lifted instantly, eyes scanning him like you knew.

Like you always knew.

He swallowed.

No more running.

No more lying.

Remus crossed the room and sat beside you, silent for a long moment. The fire crackled between you, throwing golden light across your face.

You didn’t say anything.

Remus clenched his jaw, staring at his hands. "I need to tell you something."

Your breath hitched.

He could feel the way your body tensed slightly beside him, not out of fear, but anticipation.

And that was the only thing that kept him from bolting.

"Okay," you said softly, closing your book and shifting to face him. "I’m listening."

He inhaled sharply, fingers twisting together. "I… I don’t know how to say this."

"Then don’t force it," you murmured. "Just tell me."

He let out a humorless chuckle. "It’s not that simple."

"It is," you said gently. "With me, it is."

His throat tightened.

Merlin, why were you making this so much harder?

"You already know, don’t you?" His voice was hoarse.

Your gaze didn’t waver. "I have my suspicions."

"How long?"

You hesitated, then said, "A while."

Remus let out a shaky breath, running a hand through his hair. "And you didn’t say anything?"

"You weren’t ready," you said simply. "I wasn’t going to push you."

That nearly undid him.

He stared at you—really stared at you. You didn’t look afraid. You didn’t look disgusted. You just looked… like you. Warm. Steady. His safe place.

He didn’t deserve you.

He never deserved you.

"I’m a werewolf," he said, voice barely above a whisper.

You didn’t flinch.

Didn’t gasp.

Didn’t recoil.

You just looked at him, really looked at him, and then—you reached for his hand and held it.

Like it was nothing.

Like he was nothing to be afraid of.

Like he wasn’t a monster.

Remus swallowed past the lump in his throat. "You should be scared of me."

You squeezed his hand. "I’m not."

"You should be."

"Why?" You asked, tilting your head. "Because society tells me I should be?"

He blinked.

"Because people who don’t know you—who never will—would call you a monster?" You shook your head. "Remus, I know you. And you are not a monster."

He exhaled sharply, closing his eyes. "You say that now."

"And I’ll say it tomorrow. And the next day. And after the full moon."

His breath stuttered. "I don’t want you to see me like that."

You smiled softly. "I’ve already seen you after."

He winced. "Exactly."

"And I’m still here," you reminded him, your thumb brushing over his knuckles.

His chest ached. "I don’t want to lose you."

"You won’t."

He looked at you, eyes searching. "Promise?"

You squeezed his hand again. "I promise."

And in that moment, for the first time in a long, long time—

Remus Lupin let himself believe it.

Remus didn't know what to expect after telling you the truth. He had spent years imagining this moment—dreading it, really. He had convinced himself that the second he let someone in, they would run.

But you were still here.

You haven’t flinched.

Haven’t looked at him any differently.

You were still holding his hand, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

The fire crackled beside you, filling the silence between you. Remus squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, trying to process the fact that you knew—had known—and you haven’t left.

“Say something,” he muttered, voice strained.

You huffed a small laugh, still holding onto his hand. “I did say something. I promised I wasn’t going anywhere.”

His lips twitched, but he shook his head, rubbing his free hand over his face. “I don’t get it,” he admitted. “Why aren’t you…”

“Running for my life?” you teased gently.

He gave you a look.

You smiled, tucking your legs underneath you. “Because, Remus, I know you. I know who you are. I know the way you smile when you read something funny. I know you always offer me the last chocolate, even when you clearly don’t want to. I know that you hate asking for help, but you’ll sit with me in the library just so I don’t have to study alone.” you paused. “I know you.”

His throat tightened.

You looked down at their joined hands, tracing small circles on his skin with your thumb. “And I know that whatever happens to you every full moon, it doesn’t change who you are.”

Remus swallowed. “You say that—”

“I mean that.” your voice was firm, unwavering. “Nothing could change the way I see you, Remus.”

He wanted to believe that. He really did. But he had spent years hating himself, convincing himself that no one could ever see him as anything other than a monster.

And now—now, here you were, proving him wrong.

He exhaled, his fingers tightening around yours. “The full moon is tomorrow,” he said, his voice quieter now.

You nodded. “I know.”

His stomach twisted. “I’ll be gone all night. And then when I get back, I’ll be—”

“Hurt,” you finished, your voice softer now. “I know.”

His grip on your hand faltered slightly. “You shouldn’t have to see that.”

You sighed, your other hand reaching up to brush a piece of hair away from his face. “Remus,” you said gently. “I want to be there for you.”

He closed his eyes briefly at the feeling of your fingers against his skin. “It’s not easy.”

“I don’t care.”

He let out a breathless laugh. “You should.”

“I don’t,” you insisted. “Because you’d do the same for me.”

His heart clenched.

You were right. He would. If the roles were reversed, if you were the one in pain, if you were the one fighting something beyond your control, he would never leave your side.

You sighed, your hand slipping back down to his. “Besides, I knew you were hiding something,” you teased. “You’re a terrible liar, Lupin.”

Remus let out a real laugh this time, shaking his head. “I thought I was doing alright.”

You grinned. “Oh, no. Not at all.”

A comfortable silence stretched between you, your hands still intertwined. The firelight flickered against your face, your eyes filled with something he wasn’t used to seeing—certainty.

Remus wasn’t used to people staying.

But maybe—just maybe—you would.

And, for the first time, he let himself hope.

Remus looked at you like you were a dream—like any second now, you would disappear, and he would wake up alone in his dorm, realizing that none of this had actually happened. But you didn’t disappear. You were still sitting beside him, still holding his hand, still looking at him like he was just Remus, not a monster.

And now you were telling him you were going to take care of him. Again.

“You don’t have to do that,” he muttered, though his voice lacked conviction.

You arched an eyebrow. “Oh? And who’s going to stop me?”

He opened his mouth, but you cut him off.

“Because I will be there, Remus. Just like I was the last two times.”

His stomach twisted. “You shouldn’t have to—”

“But I want to.” your voice was firm, steady. “Remus, I chose this. I chose you. So you don’t get to push me away, alright?”

His breath hitched. I chose you.

You said it like it was the easiest thing in the world. Like choosing him—the boy who carried secrets heavier than mountains—was as simple as picking a book off a shelf.

“You chose me,” he repeated, his voice barely above a whisper.

You smiled softly, squeezing his hand. “Yes, I did.”

Remus exhaled shakily, staring down at your joined hands. “I don’t deserve you.”

You let out a dramatic sigh, tilting your head. “No, you really don’t.”

His head snapped up, startled—only to find you grinning at him. He let out a short laugh, shaking his head. “You’re awful.”

“I am,” you said, still smiling. “And yet, you love having me around.”

He stiffened.

You noticed.

Your grin faltered slightly, your expression softening. “Remus?”

He swallowed, looking anywhere but at you. “I just… I don’t want you to regret this,” he admitted. “Being around me. Helping me.”

You frowned. “Why on earth would I regret that?”

He inhaled sharply. “Because one day you might realize that I’m not worth it.”

Your face fell. Then, without hesitation, you reached out, cupping his face in your hands.

His breath caught.

“Remus John Lupin,” you said, voice soft but firm, “You are worth it. You are so worth it.”

His heart pounded against his ribs.

You ran your thumbs gently over his cheekbones, your touch featherlight. “You are not a burden. You are not a monster. You are not something to be ashamed of.”

He clenched his jaw, his throat tightening. “You don’t know what it’s like.”

“No,” you admitted. “I don’t. But I do know you.”

He wanted to say something. Anything. He wanted to tell you that you made his world brighter, that he felt lighter every time you were near, that he had never felt this way before.

But the words wouldn’t come.

So he did the only thing he could.

He leaned into your touch.

Your fingers curled slightly against his jaw, your breath hitching at the movement.

Remus exhaled slowly, closing his eyes. “You make it better,” he murmured.

You stilled. “What?”

He swallowed thickly. “The full moons. The pain. The guilt. Everything.” He opened his eyes, meeting yours. “You make it better.”

Your lips parted slightly, surprise flickering across your face. Then, after a moment, you smiled—the kind of smile that made his chest ache in the best possible way.

“I’ll always be here,” you whispered.

And for the first time in his life, Remus believed it.

Waiting for you.

It was the night of the full moon.

The moment dinner ended, the Marauders had started preparing to leave. It was subtle—James and Sirius casually excusing themselves, Peter following a little too quickly—but you knew exactly what they were doing. And so did Remus.

He had tried to act like everything was normal, but you weren’t fooled. His jaw was tight, his hands clenched at his sides. Every movement seemed heavier, like he was dragging himself toward an inevitable fate.

Now, as they stood in the dimly lit corridor near the entrance to the grounds, you watched as James clapped Remus on the shoulder. “See you in the morning, mate.”

Sirius smirked, trying to lighten the mood. “Try not to bite anyone important.”

Remus rolled his eyes but didn’t respond.

Peter muttered a soft, “Take care, Moony,” before they all turned, heading toward the Whomping Willow.

Remus lingered.

You stepped forward, placing a gentle hand on his arm. “Rem,” you said softly.

His shoulders tensed at the nickname—the one you had first used weeks ago, the one that made his heart twist every time you said it.

He turned to face you. “I’ll be fine.”

You frowned. “You and I both know that’s not true.”

He swallowed.

You reached out, wrapping your arms around him without hesitation.

He stiffened at first, but then—like always—he melted into your touch. His arms slowly came around you, holding you close, his fingers gripping the back of your sweater like you were something solid to hold onto.

“I’ll be waiting,” you murmured against his shoulder.

He squeezed his eyes shut.

You pulled back slightly, just enough to look into his face. “Come back to me, okay?”

Something inside him cracked.

He nodded stiffly, not trusting his voice.

You smiled, a soft, reassuring thing, before pressing the lightest of kisses to his cheek. “Go.”

Remus inhaled sharply, then, without another word, turned and walked toward his fate.

You stayed behind, watching as his figure disappeared into the distance. Then you turned on her heel, heading straight to Gryffindor Tower.

You had a long night ahead of you.

The common room was quiet when you arrived, most students already having gone to bed. You made your way up to the boys’ dormitory, settling yourself near Remus’ bed with your legs crossed beneath you.

And then, you waited.

At first, you tried reading, flipping mindlessly through the pages of a book. But your mind refused to focus. The clock on the wall seemed to tick louder than usual, each passing second dragging painfully.

So you switched to something else—your project.

You carefully pulled out the parchment where you had scribbled notes, your own messy handwriting detailing every ingredient, every failed attempt, every hopeful possibility.

A potion to help Remus regain some control.

It was ambitious. Maybe even impossible.

But you had to try.

You chewed on the end of your quill, eyes scanning the notes you had gathered. You knew that maybe you could do a combination of calming draughts, strengthening potions, something to dull the pain or suppress the worst instincts.

You scribbled a few more ideas, then let out a frustrated sigh, pushing your hair out of your face.

Your eyes flickered to the clock.

3:12 AM.

You bit your lip. He wouldn’t be back for hours.

Your chest ached at the thought of what he was going through at that very moment. Was he in pain? Was he hurting himself? Even with the Marauders there, you hated knowing that he was suffering alone.

You sighed, leaning back against the wall.

The dorm was quiet, save for the occasional rustling of the wind outside.

You stayed like that for hours, pacing, thinking, waiting.

You just had to hold on a little longer.

By morning, Remus would be back.

And you would be there to catch him when he fell.

—— 🌙 ——

A note from the author:

Hello my loves!

Well, that was intense.

No more secrets between them, and Remus finally realising a lot of things. Especially that he more than likes reader.

Hope you liked this one! Thank you for your kind comments in every chapter!! 🤍

See you soon!

Taglist: @iloveremmy @jjamjamie @breakawayfromeveryday @oursweetmoony @whimsical-mistakes @froggiedragon @deathmybride @nerdbirdsworld @wolfstarsprongs @mischievousmoony @httpvomitello @msfandomsblog @starofthedawn @malenk @diiyaa @theonyxstate @waitforiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit @theredvelvetbitch @ohheyitsrowan @a1ienmush @michtellch (If you want to be tagged, let me know!)

#harry potter #fanfic #marauders era #x reader #x yn #marauders #remus lupin #sirius black #james potter #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x reader #lily evans

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