#it’s fitting and hilarious

[occasionally-good-ideas]

The Ancients are Gods

Just straight up Gods, one’s you can pray to, give offerings and such and maybe get a lil blessing or help from

Get nightmares?? Offer Nocturn some tea and dreams in exchange for no more nightmares, ‘man you can Have those dreams as long as I get some good, no nightmare, Rest.’

Your asshole neighbors keep raking your lawn but you need that Free Mulch for your garden next spring? Tell Overgrowth about it. 40% chance you won’t even need to give him anything, the promise of a garden will be enough for him to Smite your neighbors tool shed (and maybe their house but that ain’t your fault)

Need help juggling classes?? Phantoms literally the God of Balance & Discovery (along with Space but only aspiring astronauts call on that part of his domain) most students will give him food and Space Shit in exchange for better work/life balance skills and better understanding In classes. But if you’re really desperate or need a Big Favor… give him one a These

[cryptocism]

"just as I did, in 1983."

you'd never know my favourite parts of the show are the fucked up insane bits when my first instinct is to draw the cheesiest thing imaginable

[sparklingthedas]

Astarion lectures of disappointment >>>

[tinukis]

HATERS MAD I CAN EXPERIENCE CHILDLIKE WONDER ☀️🌟‼️‼️‼️

egghead becoming animated has permanently changed me as a person

[54625]

sorry this is so fucking funny. "They're really hard selling it" 😭

this is exactly what I was talking about

[nanaonmars]

jason: why won’t you leave my dad alone?!

clark: because we’ve been together for 20 years jason… we have 8 kids, you included, and… we’re in love

duke, in the background: boke!

jason: i’ll find dirt on you yet. i’ve got people working on it.

clark: 🧍🏻

[ineffable-gallimaufry]

if they made a homestuck movie:

VOICEOVER: it's coming...

*two drum beats*

JOHN EGBERT: *puts the disk for sburb into his computer* i'm in

VOICEOVER: this summer

*two drum beats*

ROSE LALONDE: *rolls eyes* john, stop goofing around

VOICEOVER: prepare to be stuck...

*two drum beats*

JADE HARLEY: *wakes up and looks around*

VOICEOVER: at home

*two drum beats*

DAVE STRIDER: *spins record* woah, this is off the wall, yo

*shitty orchestral cover of sburban jungle plays*

ROXY: but you don't understand! this game is dangerous!

*cut to dave leaving his clone behind at his quest bed*

DAVE: i can't do it... i just can't kill another me...

*bec noir appears next to alt dave*

ALT DAVE: he's right behind me isn't he

*fades to black as bec noir slashes a sword at alt dave's neck*

*text on screen reads "ASCEND"*

*cut to rose in her shed*

JOHN: rose, the meteor's gonna hit!!

ROSE: *grabs computer* *rolls eyes*

*text on screen reads "DESCEND"*

*cut to scenes of the war on the chess field*

*text on screen reads "RISE UP"*

*cut to john, running out of his kitchen*

JOHN: these imps are everywhere!!

*text on screen reads "ABSCOND"*

ROSE: it's all over...

*cut to the various sprites being sprited*

*cut to jake kissing dirk's head*

DIRK STRIDER: *standing nearby* *coughs* awkward...

*cut to terezi and john after game over*

TEREZI: john, 1t's 4ll up to you now...

JOHN: *gasps*

*cut to john and dave hugging*

NEPETA: *grins* :33< i ship ittttt

KARKAT: *facepalm*

*cut to terezi and vriska facing off*

TEREZI: vr1ska, you c4n't do th1s!

VRISKA: watch me!

*montage of vriska doing a bunch of random and cool stuff*

VRISKA: i can do anything!!!!!!!!

*cut to grimdark rose and dave*

ROSE: to win... we're gonna have to blow up the sun

DAVE: awww snap

*text on screen reads "NIC CAGE"*

JOHN: and i mean, of COURSE con air is the best movie ever!! what other movie would you even suggest

*text on screen reads "LIL NAS X"*

DAVE: man, this isn't even the best song in obama's whole rap career

*text on screen reads "AMANDLA STENBERG"*

ROSE: *rolls eyes* whatever, mom! i'm summoning cuthulu!

*text on screen reads "ZENDAYA"*

JADE: *petting bec* oh, who's the best dog! is it you?

*a bunch more celebrity names on screen*

*text on screen reads "BASED ON THE WEBCOMIC BY ANDREW HUSSIE"*

ANDREW HUSSIE: *sitting in chair* wait, am i still in this movie? do i still die?

VOICEOVER: yes

HUSSIE: oh poop

*text on screen reads "HOMESTUCK: THE MOVIE"*

JOHN: we're gonna save the world... or die trying

*quick montage of every single death scene*

DAVE: i think we're gonna die trying

JOHN: daaaaveeee

*text on screen reads "COMING THIS SUMMER"*

*cut to dave beatboxing*

KARKAT: CAN YOU SHUT UP?!

DAVE: are you gonna make me?

NEPETA: :33< ooooh—

DAVE and KARKAT in unison: DON'T SAY IT

NEPETA: :33< ship it

*they both sigh*

*cut to black*

[doghowto]

Berners: Best or Worst workout buddies? 😅 Follow me for more gentle giants!

[merp-blerp]

Elpenor: *Dies because he was doing something dumb* Also Elpenor:

[bizarrelittlemew]

OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH SEASON 2 | BLACK PETE favorite lines/moments (all of them)

[hitwiththetmnt]

I was gonna explode if I didn’t get to sketch the future designs (°▽°)

[friedri-ce]

carrying them around like a cardboard cutout

[evafhernee]

pac literally ordering for his viewers to send subs to fit after learning that when he hits 10k subs he’ll wear a maid dress lmaooo

pac: i wanna see it!

(fit tells him that it’s not a reachable goal for him)

pac: i’m sorry fit, but that is a very reachable goal

fit actually got so many subs out of that his sub count broke. the power of pac wanting to see fit in a maid dress broke his sub count.

[codename-adler]

watch the Twinyards build a playhouse for Aaron’s twins, who immediately request their presence inside for tea, only for Aaron and Andrew to just… fit right in. no struggle at all. how mad do you think they’ll be.

[mlady-magnolia]

Fontaine and its singular graveyard ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Part 2 of the Fontaine Graveyard Shenanigans

[royaltea000]

oooh fruitieee!!!