#it was quite literally apart of my childhood lmao

[softyshibu]

Season 3 of Frankenhole is looking good.

/j

[bowieandqueen11]

Resolved Issues / Roman Roy Imagine

Request: HIIIII gonna send my succession request while i still can lol.

how about roman and reader sharing childhood stories? him realising that perhaps, maybe the way his family has treated him is tiny bit Not Normal. the reader being somewhere between "oh my god let me give you a hug" and "i just might fight logan roy in the parking lot". yknow good old hurt/comfort you do it like no other

Thank you so much sweetie!! But also yes I feel this in my soul frick Logan Roy lmao 

Warning: strong language. mentions of diarrhoea and mentions of child abuse/ physical abuse! 

This 3k beast took quite a while to write, so feedback is appreciated! Thank you! :)

(I do not own Succession or its characters, all rights go to creators. Gif credit goes to @loverboyromanroy.)

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°

Roman shrugs his shoulders and looks steadily at you, straight into your eyes.

‘The fuck- how should I know? Like... twenty three, ish?’

Roman’s perching on the edge of his own sofa, so obviously uncomfortable even in his own apartment. His wrist flicks as he answers, and a few drops of the whiskey he hasn’t touched comes sloshing round the side to stain his brand new eggshell blue decorative pillows. He had never cared much for property. But then again, he hadn’t cared much for whiskey either growing up; it had been his father’s drink of choice, and therefore his. The faint fire in the cold marble fireplace behind his head licks between his ears, and illuminates the confused amusement gleaming in his eyes.

You scoff, and shake your head at him incredulously. ‘You own twenty three houses, and you choose to live here?’ Awaiting an answer you know will be even more ridiculous, you make an effort to tuck your legs criss-cross under you, and sit with your knees resting just underneath Roman’s lower legs. ‘And yet you still live in the coldest ass apartment, I swear to god I’m freezing my ass off, and that’s even with the fire going. Are you a fucking yeti or something, Roman Roy?’

He chortles as you continue: ‘you thrive in colder climates, huh? That’s not surprising, considering a glare from your father could freeze hell over.’ You take a final sip of your drink before reaching over and placing it on the sleek black coffee table; Roman’s eyes drop for a split second as if almost in despondency, some kind of deep scarred sorrow peeking its way out like a tired child, before rising back to yours, seeking comfort. It doesn’t slip your attention. You make sure your fingers brush against his socks as you slip your hands back to your lap, and give a sweet squeeze to the tippy toes. He lets out a giggle and kicks his foot out at you, and it’s the most delightful sound you’d ever hear: that true, unadulterated happiness that Roman Roy rarely ever is permitted to have, without some kind of malicious intention lurking behind it.

‘Okay, well, one’, he ostentatiously holds a finger up by twirling it in the air, and it takes you a second to realise he’s pointedly showing you his middle finger. ‘Fuck you. Two-’, he decides to count with his pinkie finger, ‘my dad owns twenty three hours, I own approximately zero fucking squilch of that. And three, I’m a fucking incredible designer - see that Feng Shui over there? All me baby, I would have fucking killed it as an interior design.’

‘Having one sad as fuck looking potted plant by the window and literally no personal items doesn’t count as Feng Shui, dumbass. You’re just sad.’

‘Okay - well - if you’re such a smartass-’, Roman winds his hands up by his head but nearly lets the crystal glass his brother had bought him for his last birthday fall onto the hardwood floor, so he grimaces and gently places it on the rug. He turns back to glance at you, and despite the fact he’s positioning himself as if he’s conducting an interview: elbows resting on knees with hands clasped out before him, face set in stone, he still looks intent and truthfully curious about the answer he’s hoping you’ll give. ‘What was your childhood home like then? I’m sure full of unicorns that shart rainbows and fucking fairies that sneeze glitter from the way you hate my deco.’

You pause to think for a minute, not fully expecting such an honest question to come from Roman Roy. You place a finger gingerly against your lip, and in that second, perched up on the edge of the pristine settee, Roman wishes he could just leap over and replace your fingertip with his lips. He had never been so entranced by someone: never had the privilege of knowing someone from this corporate world who would be so truthful, so different from him. And yet, at the same time, someone who so deliciously, so crudely, so cruelly reminded him of the young child locked in the cage within his heart: so unknowingly let him cling onto the little bit of him he had tried to keep alive. The only bit of him left that wasn’t a Roy. That was just Roman.

Yet, even in the hope that clouded his mind as he awaited your answer, your words came like slices to slit against his throat. ‘Well, I suppose my home was... well, not to sound pedestrian, or super corny, but it was a happy one?’ He nodded, content to bleed out in front of you. ‘There was usually a lot of laughter, and of course a lot of stress, but you know. We could all rely on each other. It was... yeah, it was nice.’ You stop, biting your bottom lip and switching your legs around so you could raise them up and pull them against your chest. 

You didn’t want to look at the man sitting before you suddenly. It was as if he had regressed into himself as you went along: withering, shivering slightly like a frosty chill over an empty playground. It looked - it felt unnatural, as he stared at you without seeing. He blinked languidly for a moment, soaking in your words, before jutting his bottom lip out and trying his best to grin at you. ‘Well, my childhood wasn’t so horrid either. My brother took me and Ken camping once, and although it was fucking sleeting down like bullets of pure fucking ice down by the stream, Connor did eat a fish that looked like a mouldy shoe and spent most of the night running off into the woods holding his ass.’

He snorts then, his little high pitched hyena laugh bubbling out of him as he places the back of his hand against his lips to try and hold it in, and you can’t help but laugh along with him at the sorry image of the supposed Roy brother patriarch scuttling around like a crab with diarrhoea. 

‘That’s sweet, but do you have any other actual memories with your family where someone isn’t being ridiculed?’

‘Woah, hey-’, he holds both his hands up, and slides down from the armrest to come sit in front of you. ‘When you meet my brother, you’ll understand that he deserves it.’ You flush slightly at the implication, becoming rather uncharacteristically bashful around Roman, and glancing quickly down between your legs. Pulling at a thread until it becomes loose, you pray the timid fire glow is enough to hide from him the rushing heat crawling up your neck. Due to the fact that Roman also is shyly looking down at the toes he’s currently wiggling to busy himself, you both miss the way the other is blushing. 

‘But...uh’, he starts finally after a moment of contemplation: a blessed few minutes of serendipitous indulgence, of growing warmth and familiarity, and just enough time for the two of you to realise how much your presence and conversation had only furthered endeared the two of you to each other, despite the hint of sadness that laced it. 

‘I really - I mean, my dad was like, always busy.’ He scratches the back of his head, embarrassed by the way you tilt your head and look quizzically at him. He becomes hyper aware of how close his knee is to resting against yours, and decides to swallow the fear that seems to be clogging up the back of his throat, and shuffles forward until there’s finally contact. ‘And my brother was like, following in his footsteps and all that jazz’, his eyes widen as he holds his hands out by his side. ‘So there wasn’t really much time for... fun, I guess. Or mistakes. Or family.’

It breaks your heart to watch him deflate once he finishes speaking, and suddenly the austere, cold walls and empty, hollow halls of his apartment make all the more sense. He looks so worn out, so tired of having to hide himself away behind a big, empty mansion full of props and antiques and nothingness all put out for show, because that’s what he was. That’s how he saw himself. A big, empty, tired, twisted puppet trying to bend over backwards to escape the marionette strings of daddy’s love, not realising they’re choking him. It was a strategy, a way to protect himself: to become placid, to mask yourself as being one of them, to fit in with his father’s lifestyle, and maybe then the slaps and strikes and kicks and whimpers would feel like something good. Because he’s trying to be just like his father. So if he’s hit, it’s only because the puppet hasn’t quite danced to the right tune, that’s all. 

As you glance around, you finally begin to notice how unused all the furniture in Roman’s apartment looks: the cellarette by the bar that looks as if it had been varnished yesterday, to the large screen television on the either side of the elongated room that Roman clearly only put on once a night to watch the news, to the velvet cushioned armchair positioned to sweep out and look across the skyline of the city, yet the headrest didn’t even have a dent. All these things. All this barrenness. It made you sick to your stomach. Here he was: a toy left on the shelf to collect dust, taken out to play with only when it suited the puppet master, and he was still so desperate for love that he still tried to copy his father. 

And you could see from the way his eyes were beginning to turn blood shot as he slowly sat there and turned the cogs in the back of his brain over, that this was a thought he had had many times before.

You try your best not to look at him too pitifully, in case he might take offence and retreat back into his shell again when you hold out your hands to him. He swallows thickly, watching your every movement as your fingers unfurl over his knees, and you signal at him to come closer. For a moment, as he squints his eyes at you, he seems tentative. But then you roll your eyes, trying your best to still seem casual, and flutter your fingers at him again. 

It takes less than a second for him to latch on this time, and his fingers grip into the sides of your skin so tightly you’re afraid he may draw blood. But then, you suppose, that’s all he’s been familiarised with.

‘It’s fine, I’m fine’, he tries to shrug it off, but his fingers only squeeze into yours all the more desperately. Worried he’ll try and pull away if you keep them suspended between your touching knees, you slowly pull them down to rest on your lap as he continues talking. He begins to play with your fingers almost subconsciously, looping them through his stout ones. ‘I mean, sure, my earliest memory is Shiv trying to drown me in the pool because she didn’t want so many older brothers to take all of daddy’s attention away from her. And Ken was never really present, dad was always shipping him away to some conference training or having him sit at his feet like his lap dog, but it’s fine. I’m fine. I grew up to be a well adjusted adult without any concerning issues at all.’

Although his tone is mocking, once he’s finished his rambling thought he lets go of your hand to rub his eyes. He does a half-yawn to try and cover the fact that they’re becoming rather bleary - to hide the fact that this is beginning to get at him, actually. And he’d rather stop now, if that’s alright. He’s the jokester in the family. The happy man. The go to cheer-upper. The pathetic one. He didn’t want to cry. He didn’t want to cry in front of you. He was never allowed to cry.

He jumps when he feels your hand against his knee, and he sniffles slightly when he looks down and sees you’ve leaned closer towards him. ‘And your dad?’, you ask quietly, cautiously, pulling the hand of his you were still holding tightly into your sternum. ‘What was he like growing up?’

‘Well, I was annoying. I- I am annoying, so, you know-’

He chokes then, and this time he can’t stop the sob that breaks out from the back of his throat like an overdue bell chime.

‘I’m annoying. I’m fucking annoying, you know that?’, he chokes out between sobs, doubling over on himself, but he’s still laughing between each gasping breathe. ‘I’m such a piece of shit’, he states, doing his best to stop his lip from wobbling and the tears from clouding out of his eyes, but he doesn’t complain when you take your hand off his lap and guide it to the small of his back, just before the dip in his shoulder blades. Gently - ever so gently, as if you were cradling a new born child still so unused to human touch, you guide him down to lie on your legs. He goes easily, taking his hands back to lean them under his chin, and allowing you full utility of your fingers. You put them to good use, beginning to stoke back stray curls of his mother’s hair away from his face, tucking them behind his ear until his breathing evens again.

He watches the sun fall over the edge of the Waystar Royco building: a sight he has seen many times before, but one that feels all the more eerie as the slates of dark metal blot out the light like a flashy tomb.

You bring him back, pursing your lips together and trying not to laugh sorrowfully as he sneezes at the feel of your finger moving down his forehead to trace over the dip of his nose, and evidently tickle it. You move onto the curve of his left eye, and it fills you with at least a little comfort to notice the way he squeezes his eyes shut at the movement. What was less welcome, though, were the few pearly tears that slipped past the cracks of his eyes and began to trace down the old bruised shaped hollows of his cheeks.

‘God Roman’, you choke out, trying to gently turn his head so he’s looking up at you. For a moment, he throws a tantrum and shakes his head in refusal, but your fingers are unrelenting and all forgiving against the side of his jaw, and soon he can’t help but give in to the love he’s so desperately begging for. He allows you to turn him, still squirming in your touch, until the two of you make eye contact. And there’s such naivety there, such desire and craving and conviction and belief as he keeps his eyes trained wholly on yours, that the words just come tumbling out of your mouth.

‘I’m going to fight your whole family I swear. I’m going to fight them all, one by one, and then take over Waystar, maybe find out what the fuck is going on between this Cousin of yours and Shiv’s husband’, he chortles at that, and chokes a little, ‘and then the two of us can burn the place to the ground and ride off into the sunset.’

Although he feels only elation at your words, he starts to shake when you use the pads of his thumbs to gently, tenderly wipe the tears away from beside his nose.

‘Stop, please’, he whimpers, but you know he’s not talking about your physical actions. ‘My dad’s never going to die, even if he is gone. Just- just- get out while you can, okay? Just fucking run.’ He grabs up at your hands, and holds onto one intently. ‘Just fucking go, okay, because I will destroy you. I’m- fucking poison, alright?’

‘No, no’, you state more firmly, when you see the creases in his forehead begin to appear. He shakes his head, and his whole face crinkles up when you admit the one thing left unspoken between the two of you.

‘You - you’re worth it. You’re worth putting up with all of this for, Roman Roy. One day, you’ll be free, and we’ll get to make new memories. Better ones.’

‘Just shut up. Shut the fuck up. Please. Just-’

His words die out on his mouth when you lean down swiftly and replace them with your waiting lips. His hand falls from where it was encircling your wrist, and after a moment of stunned shock, comes up to press firmly against the nape of your neck. His widened eyes melt slowly into a blissful, languid close, and despite the fact that he has no fucking idea how to actually kiss someone he cares about, he does a mighty good job of latching onto your bottom lip and whimpering when you go to pull away.

‘You promise’, he whispers into the tense air between the tip of your nose and the side of his stubble. He leans up to kiss you again, and a bite of saltiness stings at your mouth. ‘You promise’, he murmurs again as he opens his mouth, refusing to break away from the kiss: instead breathing you in and licking the tip of his tongue against your own. Steadying yourself, you grip onto his biceps, and press a last, ardent kiss to his mouth by latching onto his top lip.

‘I swear, Roman, I swear to god I’m going to make up for all the lack of love your family has given you. And I’ll start right now.’

[antiyourwokehomophobia2]

I guess I want to appeal to your compassion a bit as a trans person. Fsr I got recommended a post where you put forward the idea that transness is caused by trauma, and also maybe that it’s annoying/laughable to you. I probably couldn’t objectively say whether childhood trauma contributed to my dysphoria because everyone feels and does lots of things for reasons they can never be fully aware of. Transition alleviated the distress I felt extremely significantly though. If it is all a trauma response (which has not been properly methodologically demonstrated by anyone afaik, except for you afaict deciding correlation = causation while reading peoples personal anecdotes that they texted you, ig?) I’m just not clear on why that matters if transitioning has helped the person, or why people who are traumatized are worthy of having that trauma derided or picked apart. I would hope that would inspire some amount of empathy instead. I don’t know if this was worth the time it took to type out because it seems like maybe the algorithm or something has really sold you on certain ideas about trans people as a monolith that I think are more reflective of tiny microcosms of teen internet subcultures than of broader reality.

Oh boy lmao.

Well, I would have loved if you had linked the post. I'm not really certain what you're referring to, and I can't imagine what I would have said to make you think I was calling any type of trauma annoying or laughable? But oh well.

"if it's all a trauma response...I'm just not clear on why it matters if transitioning has helped the person"

Anon, do you feel this way about anorexia? Anorexia is also often caused by trauma. Do you have a hard time understanding why people do not support liposuction for anorexic people? After all, if it's all a trauma response...I'm just not clear on why it matters if weight loss has helped the person. Isn't that right? Why should things like alcoholism or drug abuse or self harm receive push back if it helps the person doing it? The only difference between being trans and literally any other condition where people hate their bodies is social perception. How is being obsessed with having or removing breasts not the same as being obsessed with weight loss?

"why people who are traumatized are worthy of having that trauma derided or picked apart"

Why is having trauma picked apart a bad thing? Therapy, as a profession, is literally focused on picking apart trauma and replacing it with rational thoughts. I'm not quite sure what you mean by this honesty? If trauma isn't picked apart then the only other option is leaving in place. Is that really the world you want to live in? A place where people who are obviously struggling never receive any pushback for decisions that are borne from those struggles? I think we have different thoughts on what does and does not help those who are traumatized. Anon, you sound a bit like an enabler.

"I would hope that would inspire some amount of empathy instead"

Of course I have empathy!! However, being empathetic does not mean that I should just be okay with whatever traumatized people decide to do with themselves. Do you think it lacks empathy to say that a suicidal person shouldn't kill themselves? I mean, having someone pour their heart out to you about how much they want to die only to tell them "you should live anyway" could come across as being very insensitive. But that displays the opposite of lack of empathy. How is it not empathetic to tell someone "hey, I know you're hurting but cutting off parts of your body and injecting yourself with drugs is not the answer"? Why does that strike you as cruel? Transitioning is a lifelong endeavor. How is it lacking empathy to say "hey, you shouldn't opt to spend your life as a neverending medical patient"?

"maybe the algorithm or something has really sold you on certain ideas about trans people as a monolith that I think are more reflective of tiny microcosms of teen internet subcultures than of broader reality."

Well, jeez! Those microcosm teens have a lot of power! I mean, fuck, biological males in women's sports? Women getting fired from their jobs for saying that males are men? Kamala Harris having *genuinely* been under fire for putting males in male prisons? Women being called bigots and facing extreme social consequences for being uncomfortable with male people in their changing rooms and bathrooms? Those teens that do not affect broader reality are supremely powerful! I'm impressed!

[jalluzas-ferney]

Soooo….I made some nationality headcannons! At first I was a liiittle bit unsure if to do so cuz then again.. they live in ninjago…. And im pretty sure countries like argentina or Morocco don’t quite exist in the ninjago universe LMAO. Butttttt. Already seen others make headcannons, so hell, why not? I uses they apply to some irl au or what if they lived in our world uk? And what different countries would I see them coming from and etc.

I can imagine that the EM might have travelled all over the world, either to go into hiding, or missions, or escape conflict, etc. Or maybe simply that’s where they came from! So yeah that’s my little explanation that is mostly for myself cuz im a little bit too literal sometimes lol.

When thinking about nationality I always think a lot about where they grew up and what nationality they grew up with and would later on identify with the most. It’s a complicated concept when your parents are from a different nationality and theyre immigrants in a different country- so you grow up in this country, surrounded by this culture and people, but your. Also. Raised by your parents who also have your family living in this completely different country- where you also find home and relate to the people considering how you look, the language you speak with your parents- or the specific culture and environment your parents grew up wiooith, impacting your home life and the way your raised. Perhaps you lived in both places, or travel a lot to your parents homeland. Perhaps you live in one of your parents countries but the other. Not. but you still identify with one of your parents nationality because of the rest of your family from that side and the culture your take in from them. So it’s always very personal! So for Kai and Nya, I imagined that ray was Argentinian and Maya Filipino. And perhaps - because I want to project onto my faves- they were born and grew up in Argentina. But have always also identified a lot with their mothers homeland, since not only does their race impact the way they might feel more different and set apart from kids there, maya loves talking about her childhood in the Philippines and is always talking over the phone with their aunts and cousins, meaning Kai and Nya def were taught some Tagalog, tho theyre not incredibly fluid with it. In their early teens they probably travelled to the Philippines, (took ray and maya some time to settle down and get enough money to travel, as well as find time) and met their whole family, and the place they reside in, habit that would turn quite common as they would continue to travel other times the following years.

For Lloyd, I really wanted to make him Asian -Brazilian. It just felt right. So imagined that my queen (don’t you judge her >:() Misako would be Brazilian, meanwhile Garmadon,Japanese. i imagine that Misako adores traveling, so she met Garmadon on her trip to Japan, and decided to stay there for a WHILE because of the brothers. During her time there, she had Lloyd. Since her family heard of her new baby, she travelled back to Brazil with a two y/o Lloyd to have her family meet the him and catch up overall. but as the serpentine wars rose In japan (ill hc it happened in japan let me know what u think of that) Misako was told to wait in Brazil. Misako didn’t really like that though, and while she dreaded having to leave her son, she was sure shed come back soon after helping out the Brothers in the battle against the serpentine. So Lloyd was left to live with his aunties and grandparents in Brazil. Of course, after Misako found out about the whole Green Ninja thing and all that crap, she pulled the same stunt as in the series and ✨ vanished ✨. But then Garmadon came and fucking took him like divorced parents sometimes do uk? So then he spent some other of his childhood years growing up in, ya guessed it, Japan. This is how Lloyd identifies both with being a Brazilian and Japanese. As for the rest, I just envision that they lived in their respective countries their whole lives till they were recruited!

[kaeyapilled]

hey! your kaeya takes are so real!!! I was wondering if you had any good fic recs?? I want to read something that has good kaeya characterization (+bonus if it's ragbros that isn't just them crying and hugging it out like you were talking about) and am tired of scrolling through tags

!! omg thank you im so honored to hear that people like my takes lol

fic recs huh!! i have some!! do you mind it if most of them are about child kaeya? (i hadnt realized how many of my bookmarks focused on his childhood until i went through them all lmao) hopefully it isnt all stuff youve already read before! here goes:

A Horse Makes for a Stable Life by FollowerofMercy – Wanting to test the boundaries of his host’s goodwill, Kaeya asks for a pony for his birthday. He didn’t expect Crepus to deliver. Or, the story in which things get uncomfortably real for young Kaeya.

do you like kaeya and crepus interactions!! because this fic explores their dynamic in suuuuch a nice way that felt very refreshing to see portrayed!! perfect ratio of hurt to comfort in my opinion. overall quite lighthearted compared to my other recs though lol. good exploration of kaeyas inner conflict since a young age. yeah i love it and recommend it

I'm gonna miss your love when it's gone by imaginarypasta – A selection of scenes from Kaeya's childhood related to his relationships with his fathers, and all they have led him to be.

this one is so good!!!! i feel like its rare to see kaeyas biological father portrayed as anything other than a heartless asshole, and this fic explored kaeyas relationship with him in such a nice manner that makes for a very melancholic and. i guess bittersweet story that takes into consideration the nuance of the situation in a way that i really dont see super often. the parts about kaeyas relationship w crepus are also really well done i love it. oh and the khaenri'ah lore the author takes some liberty with is really really interesting!!

not bad for a walk on death's doorstep by b_attery – Fear is a knife’s edge. Fear is a killer. Fear is how you know you’re still alive.

my bookmark of this work said "literally the best kaeya character study ive ever read" and honestly i still stand by that. the word flow is great and the exploration of fear as such an intrinsic part of kaeya's life and as the driving force for most of his actions and feelings and responses. it's so good!!! this one contemplates kaeyas childhood both before and after his arrival in mondstadt and goes until after diluc's return. absolutely recommend it!!

Hundred-Watt Light by pepperjuice – A story about ten years of contingency plans and holding your own hand. (Because how else are you supposed to live with a weight too big to hold all alone?)

this. this rewired my brain forever. this holds the title of best kaeya character study ever along with the previous one i talked about. definitely mind the tags because it primarily deals with suicidal ideation and thoughts so, if that's a trigger then it's best to not read this one lol but still it is SO good and it explores kaeya's inner conflicts and awful coping mechanisms after having such a heavy burden thrusted upon him at an extremely early age with no good support of any kind. i absolutely love this fic it's very dear to me and i think about it sooo often it truly altered my brain chemistry

things fall apart by kernsing – Happy eighteenth, Diluc.

finally some ragbros content! sadly it isnt the reconciliation you asked for it's about when things fell apart. this is one of my favorite ever renditions of how it all went down on That Day - it reshaped some of my own headcanons, actually. this one is more from diluc's pov than kaeya's, and it's written really really well, and explores diluc's grief over his father's death in SUCH an amazing and interesting way!! and the way it parallels kaeya's own emotions and that is exactly what causes them to fight is extremely tasty i loved it. read it it's good

okay i can probably find some more but this is enough for one post i think. deeply sorry for not delivering the good ragbros reconciliation content.. i tbh haven't gathered a lot.. but i hope you and whoever else reads this enjoys these! thank you for the ask <3

[panoffrying]

okok so ummmmm ,,, this took me a while to write down bc i fucking SUCK at writing down my thoughts in actually coherent ways so i hope this all makes sense:

i think sozo's sorta the black sheep where he comes from . a lot of stuff abt ants is usually abt how BRUTAL they are toward other ant colonies , literally ripping each other apart an kidnapping babies n shit . so i think sozo's colony was sort of like that—very warrior-oriented with not much space for anything else . then there was sozo , who didn't have Any interest in fighting or anything to do with battle , instead WAY more interested in fungi an stuff

in his colony (and in others) fungi r generally treated as life-threatening pests , since EVERY ant ever knows tha horrifying tale of cordyceps an how they'll rip apart a colony from tha inside out n whatnot . most of sozo's colony just thinks his fascination with fungi is simply a childhood phase , that he'll get over it n realize how dangerous they are , but he doesn't because it's NOT A PHASE , MOM !!!!!!!! he wants to be a MYCOLOGIST , not a WARRIOR !!!!!!

(his colony is also in silk cradle . i forgot to mention that so i'm putting that here)

so sozo ends up leaving his home as a young adult after growing up as a social outcast , wanting to pursue his own dreams instead of just listening to whatever his queen wanted . he eventually Does become a mycologist an one day , ends up at shamura's grand temple to add his knowledge of fungi to their great library , which is when they first officially meet each other . at first it's a fairly generic follower meeting his god type thing , but after a while of talking their conversations slowly get more casual an they begin regarding each other as friends , an then eventually Close friends . maybe they could've become more if sozo hadn't gone off to anura , discovered those mushroomos, and ,,, well . you know what happens to him .

eventually shamura forgets about sozo (since this all takes place After narinder's betrayal) but they occasionally get a strange , yearning feeling ,,, like someone used to come to them everyday to talk about ,,, something. they can't quite remember what , though ...

it's only after the lamb takes over , when shamura is indoctrinated and sozo gets brought back from the dead (then promptly goes through rehab) that they meet again . shamura doesn't quite recall sozo an he only vaguely remembers them , but they still like to hang out together , especially as shamura's head injury slowly stabilizes into something more manageable for them . shamura likes to hear him talk abt his studies , and sozo likes having an attentive audience . they're really good friends who also maybe wanna kiss (but shamura isn't willing to unpack THOSE emotions yet bc they have weird feelings abt romantic relationships after that whole fiasco with their ex a few millennia ago but sssshhhhhh)

anyway that's abt it :3 i'm just realizing it kinda dipped into sozura toward the end there but ehhhhh that's still TECHNICALLY a sozo headcanon if u squint so

SORRY I TOOK SO LONG TO ANSWER THIS MY LIFE GOT A BIT CHAOTIC BUT YOOOOOOOOO OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH EEEEEEE I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS!

It’s very different from other sozo headcanons and I like that a lot. I like to imagine for your headcanons sozonius is literally like hiccup from how to train your dragon lmao. To be fair he might know some self defense based on how he was raised.

I like the idea that sozonius colony was in silk cradle in which I have it in my headcanons that after Narinders banishment silk cradle becomes the most dangerous land of war, just killing without thinking. God bless Sozonius for making it through their bro💀🙏

AND YOU KNOW ME IM ALWAYS A SUCKER FOR THAT SOZURA FOOD. I really like the idea of sozonius meeting Shamura before sozonius went to Anura. THE BUGS ARE BESTIES a bishop and a mortal ant.

Bro my heart of thinking of Shamura remembering sozo in random moments and wondering where he is, then having to be explained to that Sozonius went missing years ago, before forgetting him again AGH MY SOUL!!! THE POTENTIAL HERE

I ADORE THIS SO MUCH THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME ABOUT YOUR HEADCANONS! Seeing this stuff inspires me and I love being able to interact with yall💜

[silverbladexyz]

Anon I think you meant the Flags + Chuuya & Rimbaud with an S/O who is like ME because reader is such a copy of me.

The images do not belong to me. They belong to their original owners.

TW: Lots of mentions of death, suicide, abuse. Stormbringer spoilers below! Also uhh this is kinda long because I got a bit too in character

The Flags + Chuuya & Rimbaud with an S/O who's like present!Dazai

Pianoman:

-He found you to be very... interesting. Someone who was so like Dazai except not as dark? Pianoman definitely keeps a close eye on you at the start

-The first time you met him you literally walked up to him and asked if he could behead you with his wires

-‘... And why would I do that?’ ‘Because it would be such a quick and painless death, not to mention it would look very pretty too! Besides, I wouldn’t mind dying at the hands of a handsome man~’

-Pianoman was kind of weirded out, but he quickly got used to your antics. He found you fun to be around, because you weren’t like anybody that he had met and dealt with before. Over time, he found you to be your own person and treated you differently than the others

-You were quite the flirty one as well... he literally can’t go for a day without you dropping some pickup lines on him. They made him blush internally quite a lot, but on the outside he reprimanded you since he technically is your ‘leader’ of some sorts

-The first few times he was genuinely worried for you. Being the leader of the Flags, he does act like a mother hen and cares for the other members. Definitely sends you to therapy, but gave up when you kept on traumatising the therapist and escaping the building just to jump into a river

-Made you wear a ‘If lost, return to Pianoman’ shirt but you just gave it to his fangirls in the Mafia. He had to deal with tons of his fangirls snatching the shirt and nearly ripping it apart lmao I don’t blame them he’s attractive

-When you two got into a relationship, Pianoman’s going to worry about you x10. Literally has to stop you from jumping into rivers and tying a noose to a beam. He assigns the Flags to watch over you, but your cunning brain always managed to outwit them

-You and Albatross often got caught up in mischief with each other, and all the other Flags members now have a headache trying to predict what you two were going to do next. But your lovely partner always managed to calm you down, even if you teased him a lot

-Pianoman does admire your smartness. You’ve helped him quite a lot in his missions, and I feel like intelligence is an admirable trait to him. When you use your smartness for the purpose of pranks and mischief, he’d gently reprimand you, but he finds your mischief amusing too

-That one time you ate a weird mushroom and was prancing around everywhere in a hyper and crazy state, that was the end of the line. Pianoman actually asks you why you were like this; he loved you and cared for you, so why were you trying so hard to kill yourself?

-You brushed it off as a ‘it’s part of my personality’, but Pianoman could see through that lie. So he very gently tilted your chin up to meet his eyes and asked the question again in a soft voice

-You were silent for a while, before slowly admitting that you had a childhood full of abuse. Pianoman listened to you without speaking a word, and you could tell that this was hard for him. It was then that you could truly see his love for you, and you felt guilty for putting him through so much stress and anxiety every time you did your suicide antics. But what you didn’t expect was for him to grasp your shoulders and look into your eyes with so much sincerity and care

‘Y/N... I love you, always have, always will. I love you because you’re so smart, strong, and unique, and how you never let anyone take advantage of you. I love you more than anybody else, and I just want to be by your side whenever you need me.’

Albatross:

-A menace + another menace = total chaos

-I’m not kidding. Literally one second can not go by without the Flags thinking ‘oh dear. What’s going to happen next.’ They couldn’t be more thankful to have Pianoman as the leader since he is pretty effective at calming the both of you down

-Albatross admires your smartness, especially how it has saved both of you a lot of times. He thinks it’s hot whenever you manage to predict the enemy’s actions, and even outwit them. Not to mention you were great at getting information too

-Loves showing his vehicles to you. Let’s be honest, you’re not the best at driving (Canon Dazai sucks at driving) so Albatross is always the driver. Most likely drives you around on his motorcycle while blasting music everywhere. He will also be more than happy to teach you what he knows about vehicles too

-Now deeper into the relationship, Albatross is concerned about your interest in suicide. He asks Doc for some advice to help you, but most of the time he’ll direct your attention away from your suicidal tendencies by taking you somewhere to do something fun

-^Y’know how he shows up at 4AM to drag Chuuya somewhere? Expect that a lot when he’s dating you. But it’s worth it because he’ll always prepare the best outings and the best surprises

-He is shocked when he finds out about your past. But he increases in the affection and comfort x10, and his hugs are tighter and longer now, because he’s afraid of losing you. Afterwards, he immediately hunts down the people/person who dared to abuse you and takes care of them himself (even shuts down their business)

-In the calmer moments, Albatross will comfort you and cheer you up if you were having suicidal tendencies/thoughts again. Even if you may not show it outright, he reads you better than other people and knows just how to comfort you. He’s not that big on words, so he’ll give you lots of affection

-He’ll always be there to cheer you up, so please trust him. It hurts him to see you closing yourself off from everybody. If you completely trust him and show it to him, then Albatross is going to be the happiest man alive

Doc:

-Also another one who found you to be quite interesting. He’s met and saved a lot of people who begged him not to let them fall into death’s grasp. But you willingly chased after death, even going as far to asking your enemies to kill you

-You definitely asked him to kill you a lot of times, including the first time you met him. Doc was amused, but he didn’t want to risk Mori’s wrath, so unfortunately he couldn’t grant what you desired

-It still didn’t stop you from asking him to poison you or use his scalpel on you. When it became evident that he wasn’t going to do those to you, you even searched high and low in his office and bedroom and managed to find some of his deadly poison. Pianoman stopped you from drinking it though, while Doc just watched in quiet amusement

-Over time, you had developed an interest in the man. His odd personality was attractive to you, not to mention his astounding knowledge on the human body made you even more curious about him. It wasn’t long before both of you fell for each other and got into a relationship

-Okay now Doc is going to be much more concerned and protective over you once you became his S/O. He hides all of his surgical tools and medicines and poisons from you in fear of you searching and finding it for your suicidal antics

-Think of this as ‘smart and hyper’ x ‘chill and smart’. When you weren’t being mischievous, you would actually help Doc brew some of his poisons, even adding some extra components to improve the substance. Because Doc isn’t as physically strong as the other members of the Flags, he would need a lot of easy-to-equip-and-use poison for his missions

-When you told him about your abusive childhood, he just kind of... froze. While he is a doctor, he isn’t a psychiatrist and he can’t really deal with emotions per say. He hugs you without saying anything, but you can feel the comfort in his hug

-Doc would teach you about the human body so that if you ever got hurt, you could heal yourself. Or you could use that knowledge to defeat your opponents more efficiently. Definitely not going to use it for your suicide attempts... right?

-Oh, and you also indulge with him about his morbid fascinations. Did I mention that ADA Dazai can be dark when he wants to? Well, let’s say that the rest of the Flags are creeped out by what you and Doc talk about sometimes... yes, creeped out even for a mafioso

Iceman:

-When you asked him to kill you, he just blinked. While he didn’t show any outward reaction, internally he was kind of confused. In his line of work, people normally asked him not to kill them, yet here you were asking him to actually assassinate you

-I feel like this can go two ways. He’d either question why and decide not to kill you because he can’t see the point, or you would convince him enough to pick up whatever item was near him, only for Pianoman to tell him that you were only joking you were not

-Iceman doesn’t really show a lot of reactions to your suicide antics. Okay well he does panic a little internally whenever he sees you go off and throw yourself into another river, but he just maintains a calm aura because he knows you’ll come back anyways

-This is kind of an ‘opposites attract’ couple. You were energetic and silly, he was calm and collected. You were more of a thinker and planner, while he was more ‘go-with-the-flow’. Despite these differences, I can see the relationship actually working out

-Iceman actually secretly stops your suicide attempts a lot more. Don’t ask how he does it; he’s great at sneaking around. When you’re about to hang yourself, you’d find the rope frayed to the point of breaking. When you’re about to electrocute yourself, you’d find that the power is turned off. When you’re about to eat some poison mushrooms, you’d find that they were replaced with harmless enoki fungi. Basically he thwarts all of your suicide attempts because he doesn’t want to lose you

-But this doesn’t really affect your relationship with him. You were still your normal happy self, and you loved a good challenge. But your love for Iceman was greater than your love for suicide; even though you were a bit annoyed every time you failed to kill yourself, you were secretly glad that you got to spend more time with him

-Apart from your suicidal antics, your happiness and silliness brightens Iceman’s day. He can be a bit too chill sometimes, so he looks forward to whatever mischief you plan because they make him smile. And making him smile is a hard feat... the Flags are kind of surprised when he did that

-He is aware that everybody in the Mafia don’t have the best backstory, but it still doesn’t stop him from teaching a lesson to the people who hurt you. You were smart enough to know what he went to do when he came home late one night, but you weren’t mad. You just hugged him quietly, and he hugged you back so cute

-Power couple that even people in the Mafia fear. Due to your intelligence and Iceman’s resourcefulness, you two are unstoppable. Mori often pairs you two together because of your effective teamwork with him

-Iceman has endless patience for those he cares about and loves, so he’ll never get mad at you for always trying to suicide. Yet he does wish that you’ll stop, because he doesn’t want you to die

Lippmann:

-He found you to be very weird and eccentric. Your suicidal antics and energetic-ness kind of scared him, but he hid it well and dealt with you politely. He is an actor afterall, and his silver tongue was on par with yours

-You know how he is canonically described as ‘beautiful in both male and female clothing’? Well because he is so beautiful, he was the target of your flirting and suicidal antics a lot of times. Literally couldn’t go a day without you asking him to kill you or double suicide with you

-But your compliments and pickup lines did fluster him a lot. While he normally reciprocated with another pickup line or simply said a ‘thank you’, boy are you making his heart beat at 205 bpm. However, his pickup lines are smooth asf that they also made you quite flustered internally

-I can see Lippmann being attracted to your energetic and silly aura, as well as your intelligence. Even though your suicide attempts lowkey make him worried and stressed, he still couldn’t help falling for you. And you couldn’t help falling for him too because... it’s Lippmann!!! No other explanation required

-He is quite busy because of his Mafia work and acting career, but he still tries to make time for you whenever he could. Mostly so that he can keep an eye on you if you ever try something weird, but he also asks the Flags to watch over you when he’s gone

-Lippmann even offers to let you star in movies with him. You accepted for a few times, and your acting skills were quite good, but you kept trying to suicide with the props on set. The directors and actors were all getting stress lines lmao

-One time you stole his submachine gun. He panicked so much when he saw it missing and quickly took it back from you before you could do anything with it. Then he realised that you had to use the gun for a mission. There was the slightest bit of red on his cheeks, but he quickly smoothed it over you teased him nonstop about it

-I feel like he would also have a talk with you about your suicidal antics, but in a more indirect way. When he learns that it was partly because of your abusive childhood, he kisses you and hugs you and gives you a lot of comforting affection. You definitely notice that he hangs around with you more whenever he could

-But don’t you dare die on him because his heart will break if you do. And I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t want to see a heartbroken Lippmann, would you?

Chuuya:

-Oh gosh

-Help him

-Chuuya definitely is irritated by your suicide attempts every single day, and yells at you for being annoying. You’re so much like that waste of bandages, and honestly it kind of scares him how alike you and Dazai were

-When he realises that he has feelings for you... he is going to be the moodiest person in the entire world. Literally snaps at you whenever he could and rants about you to the Flags, but since you’re great at reading people, you could tell that he was in denial

-In the end, the Flags were so tired of his behaviour that they set him up with you and made him confess. It worked... kinda. Chuuya was internally glad that he got to be with you, but on the other hand he was ready to beat his friends Albatross up

-But when you got into a relationship with our beloved ginger, your suicide attempts had... slightly decreased. Mostly because you didn’t want to stress Chuuya out, but it didn’t stop you from jumping into rivers. Only you didn’t jump into every river that you saw now

-The Flags often teased Chuuya about how he would handle your suicidal antics. Even though he tells them that he could handle it, secretly he is worried and anxious that you’d succeed in one of your suicide attempts. He can’t bear the thought of you leaving him, even though you were still annoying from time to time

-Despite all of this, he can actually handle you better than he thought. Maybe it was because he had so much experience with Dazai, or he was just naturally gifted in that area. Because you’re so much like that mackerel, your teamwork with Chuuya is astounding as well

-When you’re not prancing about finding ways to suicide, your relationship with Chuuya is actually quite chill. Because of your intelligence, you know how to carry a conversation and which topics not to talk about because it would trigger him. Chuuya appreciates how you don’t tease him as much because he has two suicidal maniacs to deal with, along with whatever the Mafia throws at him

-In his soft and vulnerable moments, he does express how much he’s scared of losing you. He’s lost too many people already, please don’t leave him too...

Rimbaud:

-You definitely scared him a lot in the start with your fetish for suicide

-He can’t help but be concerned for you, and timidly asked if you were alright lots of times. You always replied with a ‘yes’, but Rimbaud still doubted that

-Has a heart attack every time he sees you go off on another one of your suicide attempts. Now Rimbaud wouldn’t really interfere because he doesn’t want to make you mad, but he just wishes that you would stop trying to eat a suspicious-looking plant every time you stumbled upon one

-His quiet and shy nature was what drew you to him. With someone that was soft and precious, yet not afraid to fight, who doesn’t like Rimbaud? I admit I’m a simp for this man

-Okay but Rimbaud cares a lot for the ones he loves. He even goes as far as to put a layer of subspace over you so that you wouldn’t actually hurt yourself or succeed in one of your suicide attempts. He was a bit scared that you would be mad at him, but when you told him that you weren’t angry, he was pleasantly surprised yet still a bit weirded out

-He admires your intelligence as well. Now he wouldn’t ask you too much for favours, because it makes him feel bad, but if the situation called for it he would ask for your assistance. Afterwards he will thank you and give you lots of soft affection

-Deeper into the relationship, he actually grows more worried for you, but he doesn’t dare to ask you why you wanted to suicide. But you’re giving him multiple stress lines and heart attacks each time you jump into a river... please stop ;-;

-But in his soft and vulnerable moments, he begs you to not leave him. Rimbaud deserves love, so please give him all of your love. In return, he will reciprocate it for eternity ❤

I hope you enjoyed this progressively-getting-worse essay that took me 2 weeks to write. But it was fun!

@pixyys @scarletta-ruan @yuugen-benni @nekokinax @xxelfmamaxx @yukitomybeloved @lakeside-paradise @dazaiyohane @angolicious @pianotross @arisu-chan4646 @catzlivedforbsd @fi-nn-losofia @sariel626 @chuuyas-beloved

[topazadine]

OC Fun Facts Tag

Thanks for the tag, @illarian-rambling! I particularly liked that your villain has a New Jersey accent lmao.

I'll do five fun facts for each of my main characters.

Uileac Korviridi

His favorite Bremish festival (predictably) is Feast of the Horse, particularly the mounted archery competition. I mean duh. He makes everyone else look like pathetic losers.

He doesn't have much of a sweet tooth, but Cerie does, so their house is usually filled with all manner of sweets.

Uileac has a bunch of weird little rituals he does before battle, like making sure he has an even number of arrows (lucky) and brushing his horse Erix's armor with blessed oils. I mean, I guess they've worked? He hasn't died yet ....

One would expect such a dextrous man would play an instrument, but he doesn't, he's too busy to learn. Though he thinks the fiddle is pretty cool.

If he did not have his beloved palomino mare Erix, he'd probably want a dapple gelding.

Orrinir Relickim

Even though he went through all the same training as Uileac did, Orrinir has never figured out how to fire a bow. No amount of training seems to make it stick.

His favorite Bremish festival is the Feast of Saint Mermina, where people throw flower votives of the saint into the water and swimmers try to retrieve them. Every damn year, Uileac intentionally designs his so they fall apart, but poor Orrinir tries anyway.

Orrinir LOVES to bake. He's very proud of his manly and cool creations in the kitchen. You know, like little apple dumplings shaped like hearts. Incredibly manly. Very brave.

Because he does not drink much, Orrinir is a total lightweight. As such, he typically is the responsible non-drinker who escorts his mildly drunk husband Uileac and embarrassingly drunk sister-in-law Cerie home.

Orrinir has been known to play around with a mini piano (kalimba) on occasion, usually when bored out in the field. He likes it because you don't really need any musical knowledge to get it to work.

Haniya Aina

Haniya is EXACTLY what you think when you think "horse girl." Kinda snobby, convinced that she has a unique bond with horses that no one else in the world could ever fathom, and obsessed with the latest and greatest in tack trends. Her horse Saelsie has tack that costs more than most peoples' houses, and can you blame her? Girlie is a literal princess.

Because her mother, Queen Susuma, was essentially absent throughout her childhood, Haniya was raised by governesses and teachers.

She loves music boxes and has quite a collection. Diplomats who want to get in her mother's good graces know to bring Haniya a pretty music box for her trouble. One of her favorites has a mechanical dancing horse.

Haniya's brother, Prince Daiski, was meant to learn fencing, but Haniya, who actually wanted to learn it, was told it wasn't a "women's skill." As such, she lied to Daiski about when his practices were supposed to be and showed up instead, threatening the instructor into silence. Those were her favorite childhood memories.

Her favorite books are about faraway lands, especially travel logs of distant places. Any time that a diplomat comes to visit her mother, she corners them and picks their brain.

Ono Kagan

Ono, being deeply socially awkward, is more comfortable around animals than people. Even animals that he's rather scared of, like dogs.

His first romantic/sexual relationship is with his wife, Vinanna, who is charmed by how sweet and shy he is. YES! The pathetic virgin gets the pretty girl!

The average Sinan outside of the upper classes is illiterate, but Ono taught himself after becoming a royal guard by taking shifts guarding the library. There, he read the children's books that Haniya and her siblings would have been told as children before working his way up to more difficult texts.

His most prized possession is his sword, Melikik ("the sea cutter"), made by his father, a blacksmith.

Ono can't hold his liquor. Like at all.

Mordrek Willets

Mordrek is somehow both the straightest and the least homophobic person in all of Sina. Gay men serve as great wingmen, and lesbians can teach him even more ways to romance a beautiful woman. Bisexuals? Why, he admires anyone who has enough eyes to ogle both sides.

He considers his mule, Carrot, to be his best friend and closest confidante. Carrot gets the best of everything, even when Mordrek can't afford to feed himself.

His greatest fear is heights. Maybe that's why Queen Susuma keeps sending him to high-altitude places.

Mordrek is agnostic. He jokes that all the gods probably hate him, so he doesn't want to believe they exist.

Though Mordrek gambles on occasion, he only plays games that he knows he can win with his wiles. Or by paying someone to fix the game for him.

Cerie Korviridi

Cerie is one of the most irritating overachievers you will ever meet. When she's working on something, you better leave her alone or you're going to get your head bit off.

Sometimes she likes to daydream about what she would have been if she didn't become a High Poet. Her top three alternate professions are horse trainer, potter, and leatherworker.

Cerie is messy af and is always forgetting where she put stuff. Orrinir yells at her about it all the time.

She's a night owl, which is unusual in a country that doesn't have artificial light like Breme. She just likes it when all the world is asleep and she can focus on whatever she wants to do.

Her favorite festival is the Feast of Snow Lights, where people go around and recite two-line traditional poems; if the homeowner misremembers it, they have to give the guest a drink. She, of course, has them all memorized, but sometimes she'll come up with her own just to screw with people, and then they have to call a "truce" and both give each other something.

Tagging @drchenquill, @the-golden-comet, @mysticstarlightduck, @davycoquette, and open tag

[starbuckaroo]

Sorry I know this is going around a lot rn but anyone who wants to say ANYTHING about bad parenting on this show and wants to talk about Eddie mf Diaz can eat a fucking dick UNLESS they can show me they’re not being hypocritical and can show me their posts that rip Athena apart. Fucking hell.

I will preface this by acknowledging that ofc there’s absolutely no way I can know what it’s like to be a black woman raising a black child. I never can. I do have some personal experience with raising a black boy in the US, though, so the episodes with Harry have always hit me really really hard, and usually because I always want to mcfucking scream at Athena for the way she allows her career indoctrination to harm her children.

Yeah my main gripe with this show always always boils down to “Athena quit your job” bc I can’t stand her anymore tbh. She would have stayed an interesting character IF at some point in s4-5 thereabouts she started to have doubts about the system and they did something interesting with that

OR

If they would allow the literal actual conflicts of interest to crop up and let her be a fucking antagonist. Let Bobby struggle with his ethical evaluation of a scene and his marital obligations. Let May struggle with learning and growing away from her childhood home and wrestle with what her mom continues to do. And let that storyline with Harry this season actually carry the fucking heavy and heinous weight that it truly has. It turns my stomach honestly like I had to stand up and walk away, and let me sister tell me when it was over so I could go sit back down.

But the apologism is what is so unforgivable. Like don’t get me wrong, I love the hell out of this show and it’s my full on hyperfixation and has been for years, but its top billed character has been nigh unwatchable for most of the last few seasons. The narrative trying to sell me that she’s one of the protagonists, that she doesn’t have to struggle meaningfully at all about what she does for a living or to her family, and I’m supposed to swallow that without protest? Nah. Can’t happen.

I liked her character a lot in the first three seasons tbh against my better judgment! I was expecting to hate her from day one but I was sold, actually. Michael leaving the show kind of tanked her character, I think, maybe. I think it was their dynamic that made her interesting at first, and then sympathetic later on when she really was trying to make their blended unconventional family work despite her upbringing. But honestly once Harry aged into teenagerdom and Michael left and May graduated it meant there was like…nothing left about Athena that was interesting except her job except that’s actually the worst part about her lmao woopsies.

Anyways. Let Athena be a villain or at least an antagonist. That would fix everything tbh. It would make her interesting again, it would be in character given how many ethical messes she’s caused or been party to, and would allow the show to keep doing their dumb copaganda shit that they’re almost certainly contractually obligated to shove in at least once per season. But it would finally be interesting because it wouldn’t feel like I was being asked to swallow bullshit covered in glitter spray. Maybe they could explore her toxic relationship with her mother and how engaging so heavily and perpetually with respectability politics has done damage to herself (and her parents and her ex husband and her children) over the years. Maybe her magical fairytale white lady boss at the precinct can actually act in character for once and pls god I would just like. I would sell a kidney for a real and honest Athena Quit Your Job plotline. Fuck. They could even take the coward’s way out like they did with Eddie’s military service and just have her quit for some random reason so ethics never actually has to be part of the conversation but neither would we have to deal with the copaganda all the time. You know Angela Bassett would act the fuck out of that kind of complicated character. It would be a real conflict instead of whatever contrived nonsense they’ve been putting on her this season.

Anyways this really fucking got away from me but I’m just not willing to hear a fucking WORD against single dad Eddie fucking Diaz unless the speaker has already done their bit about Athena and they’re just making their way through the line.

Except

I don’t actually want that bc We Know Why they’re saying that shit about Eddie and if they ever opened their mouth about Athena I don’t even really have to wonder about what sort of racist bullshit might fall out. Those aren’t the people I want attempting to critique Athena Grant. So actually yeah can everyone just shut the fuck up.

Myself included.

[snufflepup]

Personally, I love stuff like chainsaw man, bungou stray dogs, the case study of vanitas, and the umbrella academy! I love things with pretty boys (probably why I like your blog~) I've seen heartstopper and tons of kill counts for horror movies though I've only seen a small handful of them, despite loving the horror genre to death. Idk what my biggest hyperfixation rn is, apart from nightcrawler from x-men apocalypse and max Dennison from the first hocus pocus movie. I've been so obsessed with him, I mean he's the cutest, second only to you, puppy~<3 I've also seen the end of the fucking world, which is just awesome and super cool! Though I wish there was more :P. I've had a huge interest in this show called total drama since I was 7 (17 now) and it was a roller coaster trying to remember that from my childhood. Though I saw why I loved it so much back then lol. It's basically like a cartoon version of survivor and it's just really cool! I recently watched a fan made series on YouTube by odd Nation cartoons, called disventure camp, and it's pretty neat. It has tons of cannon lgbtq characters, which I absolutely adore in shows. There's this one gay trans guy that literally looks like me and he's just ahhh! I love the things I watch a lot, perchance too much lol. No one irl ever wants to talk with me about this kind of stuff :<

-Ike<3

I've heard of those before ! I've watched a little bit of some of them, as well !! I keep meaning continue watching them, but I haven't yet. Are those your favourite animes ? If nkt, what are ? ^–^ I've also seen the first two seasons of the umbarella academy ! (｡>\\<) ! I've read all of heartstopper, and watched the first season ! I actually only found out there was more seasons recently !! I remember hearing about new seasons, but I just assumed they weren't out yet . but I'm pretty sure . that was a while ago, and I just have a bad sense of time . I've not seen that before, is it good ? aaa Me too, I feel like I haven't seen a lot either, despite liking them !! I've seen IT, the fear street movies and an escape room based one ?? I think there might be more, but these are the ones I remember the most ! It's a little funny, but the first time I watched the escape rooms one was the night before I was going on a flight, and I'm a little nervous of planes so I had watched it hoping it would take my mind off of it . and there was like . three plane crashes or something lmao . I think my biggest at the moment is Omori, Fairy Tail and Seraph of the End/Mikayuu ! I've only really been on the avengers side of marvel, I actually didn't even know X-men was marvel until a couple weeks ago. . . but ! I want to get into it, though, I'm not sure where to start ! so ! Where should I ? I don't think I've seen Hocus Pocus either, but I keep hearing good things about it. . . I'll definitely watch it now !! :D I've never heard of the end of the fucking world, what is it ?

I know total drama too !!! I know what happens because me and my sibling watched it together earlier this year, after getting really invested in the roblox game based on it ! My sibling got a lot more into it than I did, but I know the characters !! Cartoons I liked a lot as a kid, and still like, are gravity falls, mlp, winx. . . As well as other animated movies ! Winx club is supposed to be getting like, a re-make ? so I'm quite excited for that !! From what I've seen, it looks good !! I also like watching people play games, talk about games or other things in general ! A video I really liked a lot is someone talking about Omori on youtube titled 'I played Omori after I lost my daughter to suicide' it made me feel really emotional and cry a lot . I also love rewatching Slimecicle's 'We spent 100 days in a hardcore minecraft apocalypse' and minaxa's video on Lacy games !!

oooo ! It sounds very cool, I'll give it a watch !! I think it's really awesome that theres someone that looks just like you, too ! I understand how you feel, they make me really happy ⪩(ᐢᗜᐢ)⪨ ! I'm sorry people don't. . . I also don't have many people I can talk about it with so I can understand you

[adambja]

Hey, so I got into spirituality a while ago and I am also have adhd and derealization. I started treatment for that and I know you are probably not a medical professional. But I wanted to ask you anyway, if you have any tipps to be present and feel oneness. I had short phases already, where I had no thoughts and it was the best thing ever. I also had my first few manifestations. Since I am an empath I take so much negative energy from other people in. I am either totally stressed out or completly at peace. I feel like I am improving so much but at the same time it feels like my life is falling apart.

Thank you for your content and your help in advance.

(Also English is not my first language.)

Hey,

Also why did you even assume I am not a medical professional? You don't know anything about me like how am I a neurologist or even a psychologist 💀?!

I literally opened a clinic and then turned down the whole thing after it was half way done because it will take too much time from my life

This was personal so anyways lmao

First of all,

Don't go to a therapist/psychiatrist

Pick a good psychologist for yourself, we are better! most of the time you don't need any medication also you wanted to ask me anyway about the tips to feel present and oneness....!

Work on your self-concept

You can buy the packages I have with coaching since you are already diagnosed with something you will get somehow an extra discount!

Use these affs

- I live in the present moment

- I am in the present moment

Also that empath thing - it's not even real

It's mostly because of your childhood and your parents

Like this sh is literally made up - it describes how you feel and it's just there for you to understand what state are you in BUT NOT to identify yourself with "I am an empath" so quit it you didn't meet the actual YOU yet!

You just didn't work on your self-concept

And when you are talking about taking bad energies from people!!

I mean people don't exist!! Then where are these energies are coming from?? It's you creating it JUST ASSUME THE BEST in fact you can't feel anyone's feelings - you can decide their feelings but you can't take it inside of you or feel it instead of them!

Nothing is actually real

This physical reality isn't real

What is real is your imagination

Did you read about eiypo? Read about it (the right ones pls not the wrong ones)

Did you read the law of assumptions post on my pinned post? Read it

You are literally manifesting all this and you just didn't have your first manifestation baby everything in your life is literally a manifestation!

That's it

Your life feels like it's falling apart because you feel like you are out of control THAT'S WHY I MADE THIS TAPE FOR EVERYONE CAUSE THEY NEEDED IT!! 💀

Because I already know what most of the people in this world is i made a lot of researches and that's another reason why you see many successes from this tape yes they aren't just the affs they are benefits too! So yeah!!

You are very welcome baby!

I would love to talk to you in my DMs due to your situation! Cause you really have something different!

I really hope you never stop getting better and I hope you stop identifying yourself with something that's not really you! I want you to move on to another level to find out who are you fr without all of this!

It's all about self-concept

[rune-tisms]

I NEED TO KNOW THE BACKSTORY OF REESE PLEASE

NO WAY OMG SOMEONE CARES ABT MY STUPID INSERT OC IM SO HAPPYYYY

i literally wrote a whole google doc about him i’ll just paste it here lmao

cw for a suicide attempt (not detailed though)

reese has lived in gotham for his whole life, but when his parents died in a car crash when he was 12 years old, he was promptly moved to the gotham city orphanage. it was there that he met edward nashton. they didn’t immediately become friends, as reese had become quite the trouble maker and frequently got into fights with the other children, but edward warmed up to him eventually. reese was the only one who actually spoke kindly to edward, which caused edward to get somewhat attached to him. once they became friends, reese quickly got very attached to edward and they were practically inseparable. reese even stopped getting into fights and found himself able to better cope with his loss due to having edward around. they would remain friends until reese was 16; their friendship would end with a nasty argument that removed both of them from speaking terms. it would begin with edward wishing for some space from reese, and reese feeling hurt by this and lashing out by accusing edward of being the reason he has no other friends at the orphanage, and from there it would just get worse and worse until it ended with both of them storming away from each other and never speaking or even being within 5 feet of each other ever again.

reese would go on to immediately join the workforce, never keeping jobs for long but making enough money to afford a shitty apartment in the slums of gotham. his mental health declined significantly and he even attempted suicide when he was 23, but was unsuccessful. the trip to the hospital caused him to become even less financially stable, so he had to take up multiple jobs at the same time, and this in turn worsened his mental health even more. he scraped by every day, barely a shell of a person, until one day he stumbled across one of the riddler’s online clues and managed to get into his community. reese found hope in the riddler’s promise of a real change, and found himself obsessing over who the person behind the mask really was. riddler had practically saved his life by pulling him out of his depressive stupor, so naturally his damaged brain latched onto him and pulled him into a parasocial relationship with this strange online figure. however, he was far too anxious to try and form an actual connection with the man or even make himself a prominent figure in his community. he settled for snippets of the riddler from his livestreams and posts, all the while wishing they could meet in person. it’s likely that, subconsciously, reese picked up on similarities between his childhood friend edward and the riddler, though he never was able to make that connection outright until edward was caught and detained and his identity was revealed on the news. as riddler enacted his plan, reese was unable to find it within himself to care that riddler was a murderer; he was in too deep already. he was simply another follower. it’s not as though reese wasn’t inclined to violence himself, anyway.

regarding the batman, reese isn’t very interested in him, and is, in fact, more jealous of him than anything. he wishes that he was doing something that could cause the riddler to be as interested in him as he was in the batman. in fact, reese often fantasized about being the batman himself, simply because he wants to be noticed and loved by the riddler.

during the flooding of gotham, luckily reese’s apartment complex was far enough away from the sea wall to suffer minimal damage. it was, however, at this point that reese began to question his loyalty to the riddler, but by this time it’d already been revealed to him that the riddler was edward nashton. he was able to sympathize with edward and his cause even more due to knowing him personally, and so mentally excused all of his actions. besides, it would be immensely painful for reese to discard his obsession since it was practically the only thing keeping him alive; edward/the riddler was the only thing that mattered anymore.

he begins to daydream about freeing riddler from arkham, but he knows he’s not smart enough to actually achieve such a feat. he hopes edward can free himself, and since edward has always been smarter than him, has hope that he can actually do it. this is where reese is at currently; waiting for edward to escape so he can finally reunite with him after all this time.

i hope you find it interesting anon thank you so much for asking :D

also, this is only one possible backstory for him, i have too many ideas 😭 if you wanna know more you can totally dm me :3 or just send another ask ofc!

[mepposprincess]

Submitting in 15 and 74 for the ask game,, (:

[ @juugahusband ]

YAAAYYY THANK U !

f/os ask game

NUMBER CHOSEN: 15

F/O CHOSEN: Haruto Asuka !

Okay this one doesn't have deep deep lore but my s/i is ya know, director for mankai bc I love when games give me an easy way to insert myself !!

Anyways ! Yeah me and haruto do not get along at first it's a lot of bickering hehe, different companies and all that! However! We have to work together eventually and get closer !!!!! And well. Goes crazy from there

Hehe I call him Haruru and he fucking hates it but it's CUTE idc

Basically, I'm annoying and he deals with me 🤷

NUMBER CHOSEN: 74

F/O CHOSEN: Jason Todd !

So this one is going to be super interesting bc my s/i is actually also an oc! I made Drew before I started making full of s/is, so they were quite literally just ocs but still. Exactly like me LMAO

Buckle up lads there is so much lore here but for times sake I'm gonna be giving a general rundown rather than discussing differing lore depending on which comic run we're talking about.

Drew and Jason are actually childhood friends! .. and also once fought against each other it's fine!

Basically Drew was given up for adoption as a baby due to mysterious powers she seemed to have, and a woman who heard about this took her in and raised her to essentially be a villain.

See Drew is capable of mimicking just about anything as long as she is able to see or hear it. People's voices, movements, actions, even other people's powers though to a much lesser degree. Nothing she replicates there would end up being as strong but it is still possible so long as she sees it happen. So of course being raised in the wrong hands she basically did anything her "mother" desired her to, telling the child that she was in the right and anyone who tried to stop her were villains attempting to break their family apart.

Eventually this all comes to a head, and she's stopped by Bruce and Jason, and Drew realizes what's been going on this whole time they are able to finally break through to her.

She ends up being taken in and raised by Dick's friend El (@eijihino 's oc !!!) and becomes best friends with Jason! She even makes them friendship bracelets that Jason reluctantly wore despite how cutesy it was lol

But uh. Then the bad thing happens and oh. Oh boy. That sure is fucked! And things go wrong. Jason's death fucked up Drew BAD and even though she keeps moving forward, it became incredibly hard for her to.

Then of course there's his eventual comeback, where Drew actually realizes pretty quickly it's him because well. He still has their friendship bracelet, causing ANOTHER breakdown but it's fine it's fine eventually things are mostly okay !

Boy does it still take a few good years after that though for the two to actually end up together they both have a lot of issues to work through, but even before then, their friendship quickly goes back into place once the two actually talk again.

It's also funny because the two enjoy so many antics and banter and they frequently annoy each other in light hearted silly ways. I adore them so much I've had Drew for such a long time and she always will mean the world to me.

And I Adore Jason so so so SOOOOOO much y'all don't even know !!! But yeah uh.. wow this was long.

[kimkaelyn]

kaelyn!! i am dropping by with some good music and new year wishes! 🎶🎉 thank you so much for being part of my 2023 🥹 i think you're so sweet!!

if i may ask!! 🥺 (pls feel free not to answer if uncomfy!!) how was 2023 for you? what’s a favourite thing (anything) you discovered this year? do you have any reflections from the past year? any resolutions for the next? 🥹

Oh my gosh, shotorus!!!! 🥹🥹🥹💗💗💗 thank you so much for your kind words. I am glad you were apart of my 2023 as well! Cheers to next year🥂

This is such a great question and it made me pause and think for a good while (I’m typing this out in my notes app lol) I haven’t reflected on my year yet so I’m doing it here.

I apologize for the length lmao.

Warning - mention of trauma (nothing graphic- literally just one line)

My 2023 was an interesting and exciting year, but also one of great challenges. Regardless, I am so proud of my accomplishments this year. I left my teen years behind and entered my twenties! Now I gotta figure out how to be an actual adult LMAO. On that note, I quit my toxic job of almost two years and was unemployed for a good two months until I started working at my current job. I traveled outside of the country for the first time. I spent 3 weeks in July with my Uncle traveling Europe. This trip was the highlight of my year for so so so so many reasons. It was also my first time leaving home and being separated from my parents for a long period of time.

Being away from home wasn’t as bad as I was scared it was going to be—I actually loved it. While on my trip, I learned so much about myself as a person and figured out what I want in life for myself. I actually learned how to think for myself instead of others this year, which is a big deal because I am always so worried about others that I never take the time to take care of myself.

On this trip, I had a lot of epiphanies. My family isn’t perfect—we have our issues like everyone else……but this year I actually started to sit down and start to unpack some of my unresolved childhood trauma. It’s nothing graphic, trust me, but let’s just say that my sister and I only had each other 90% of the time. My sister and I have started to actually talk about our experiences with one another and are slowly coming to terms with it and heal. I am so proud of this. We are making progress that should have started years ago, but it’s not too late. There is hope!

As for resolutions….i want to do better—by myself and others. I want to actually put myself first in some cases and do what’s best for me and my mental health instead of catering to others. Does that make me selfish? I don’t know….

My overall goal is to get accepted into university and get started on my future—on my own two feet and not relying on others, at least for now. I want to be independent for the first time in my life. I’m TERRIFIED, but I know that I will be okay.

I have a great support system—I got all of y’all here, my family, my boyfriend, and my irl friends. I am so thankful to all of you, even if we don’t talk much and only interact by liking each others posts. Meeting my mutuals on here has been a highlight of my year, and I am so happy to go into the New Year with you all. Regardless of if you live nearby or on the other side of the word, I am super thankful to each and everyone of you. I cannot put it into words. I love you all and I pray that you are blessed in 2024

💗🫶🏻✨

[eldorr1e]

I just did some searching here in tumblr abt the rise of the brave tangled dragons and I’ve come up with a few headcannons. Also don’t get mad at me if these headcannons aren’t close to cannon at all or don’t fit yours, this is MY headcannons and it’s up to you wether or not you like it. Take it or leave it. Also it’s been awhile since I’ve watched any of these movies so bare with me 😭

If they were in the modern au:

- Jack would be a prankster/trouble kid and always has something up his sleeve

- literally does not take anything seriously

- people are annoyed on how carefree he is

- his behavior makes it look like he actually doesn’t care about anything or anyone

- in truth he actually does but he doesn’t know how to show or expresses his feelings

- is the clown friend.

- has some very complicated feelings abt him not finding who he is and he feels so out of place at school. He’s desperate to know who he is and tries everything he can catch with his hands to see if that thing sparks joy or thrill inside him or not.

- he has tried every single club or extracurricular activities in school, but it seems he can’t find anything he enjoys and he fears that if he doesn’t find one he won’t be able to survive the real world. So he just keeps on trying and experimenting over and over again.

-he has so many hobbies he just doesn’t know what to do with it.

- but he does enjoy skateboarding so that’s that!

- okay I don’t know why but Rapunzel seems like she’d be a manic pixie girl for some reason to me 😭 like cmon bro was locked up her entire childhood and most likely mother gothel allowed her unrestricted access to the internet (probably? I’m not sure, maybe Rapunzel would find a way to use the family computer without her mom noticing 💀)

- she definitely has mode mental scar from the internet don’t even think that’s impossible

- you and I both know the internet… it’s a dangerous place 😁

- trauma from amino. I will not elaborate.

- and she would seem like a weird girl due to her being homeschooled and literally being so out of touch with the world so she wants to live up to every experience possible

- after she found out she was going to a real Highschool she was estactic

- has the touch of the tism (maybe all 4 of them too now that I’m thinking about it)

- I would love to see her in some outdated 2010-2014 outfits and her thinking she’s the most drippiest person on earth lmao

- she is in so many fandoms you have no idea.

- I would love to be friends with her because she’d likely know most of the fandoms I know and would indulge with me with each one 😭 (she’s an og for this✊)

- star butterfly kinnie probably

- okay it’s been awhile since I’ve last watched httyd (seven years *cough*) so my headcannons for hiccup will probably not be as accurate as it seems so don’t throw fire balls at me 😡

- most sane out of the entire three

- literally keeps everyone in line, is the mom too 😭

- responsible teen and is quite mature for his age

- well respected and has a great reputation, but him being friends with the three makes it falter just a little

- his dad owns some company or something and his dad keeps pressuring him to be the greatest yatta yatta yatta which makes him uncomfortable with the amount of expectations and pressure laid upon him on an early age.

- does not want to be apart of it bc he thinks he’ll fuck it up

- loves his friends so much you have no idea

- Merida would be THE sport kid in school don’t even test me

- she absolutely excels in archery and is literally apart of the school’s archery program. She’s very passionate abt it and is the fewest of things that makes her feel alive

- does fencing too but she likes archery more

- her mom doesn’t approve of this at all but her dad is very supportive and just wants her to be happy

- incredibly loud! Has an extremely extroverted personality and is friends with mostly everyone

- her family owns a big business too and she’s the next in line to managing it, except she knew at a young age that she really doesn’t want to do it and wants to be successful at her own thing.

- she’s both scared and angry at her mom for always restricting her with nearly everything and making sure she’s the ‘perfect girl/daughter’, always putting her in etiquette classes and stuff like that

- her mom keeps insisting she’s doing this for her own good and that it will come handy in the future but Merida ain’t having it.

- she’s scared at her mom because one time Merida was practicing archery for a little too long and was late for an important meeting her family was attending to. Her mom was so angry that she burned her archery equipment right infront of Merida which fucked up her brain chemistry 💀

- her mom feels bad but they haven’t really discussed or communicated about this yet, so their both on a tense situation everytime their near each other.

- mommy issues go her

- SHE LISTENS TO MITSKI

- she loves her mom to the bottom of her heart, she really does. And deep down she is aware everything her mom is doing is for her sake and that she should listen to her atleast once. But she has been hurt beyond repair due to their past experiences with her mom and they both don’t seem to know how to fix it.

- therapy is the answer girl 😭

Okay so right now that’s all I can think of at the top of my head. There are probably some more that I left out either on purpose or I just forgot. But holy crap this is the first time I’ve ever made a headcannon list so I’m pretty impressed with myself rn

[mermaidsirennikita]

can you rec some of your favorite books where the hero is actively pursuing the heroine? I feel like a lot of books I’ve read they’re just kind of thrown together? if that makes sense.

also, as an aside, I just read The Rogue Not Taken by Sarah Maclean and it was so good, loved the grovelling

I love The Rogue Not Taken! It's such a good roadtrip romance, so much tension.

And yeah, I have some recs! Usually some outside circumstances still kick things off, but the hero is more of an active pursuer in them. Adding below:

The Day of the Duchess by Sarah MacLean--This is actually about Sophie's sister Seraphina and and her husband, Malcolm (Haven). Yes, the one that Sophie confronts when she finds him fucking another lady. The book is set years after Sera leaves him, and she returns to ask for a divorce. He asks her to choose his next duchess as a prerequisite, but he's really just trying to win her back very intentionally. Book-long grovel. I actually love this one even more than The Rogue Not Taken; it's a very passionate and grown up book about two people who really love each other but have a lot of adult issues. As a heads up, Sera does lose their baby in the prologue.

Daring and the Duke by Sarah MacLean--Another book-long grovel. This is the last in her Bareknuckle Bastards series, and I do think it's a bit better if you read the first two (which I also recommend, though this is my favorite of the trilogy) but it can be read a standalone. Hero and heroine were childhood sweethearts driven apart by insane circumstances. He's the villain of the series, and thought she was dead until the end of book 1. He quite literally and figuratively pursues her and grovels throughout the book, and she expects a LOT from him.

A Scoundrel of Her Own by Stacy Reid--Finished this day, very good book. Another childhood sweethearts sitch where they were separated. Hero was poor, heroine was upper class, and he's become rich since then. He does not want to marry her, but he does want to become her lover and pursues her on that front (obviously deep down he's absolutely in love with her from the jump).

Secrets of a Summer Night by Lisa Kleypas--Another situation where he doesn't want to marry her but is pursuing her. Heroine is upper class but her family has lost their fortune, hero is a wealthy self-made man. She's trying to make an upper class match, and he offers to become her sugar daddy, essentially. She's SUPER offended, but that does not stop him.

Marrying Winterborne by Lisa Kleypas--This one, I will say, is better if you read the preceding book Cold-Hearted Rake (which is kind of a widowed heroine meets rake, uptight meets wild book, would recommend) first because the love story starts there as a secondary plot. Hero is a wealthy self-made man (oh, Lisa) and the heroine is a soft-spoken, shy, upper class woman. He begins courting her in Cold-Hearted Rake, and he very much wants to possess and marry her, but he's actively horrible at expressing his feelings in the soft manner she wants and sort of frightens her with his intensity at first, lol. He's daddy, and it's a sweepingly romantic book.

The Luckiest Lady in London by Sherry Thomas--Hero is the man everyone wants (he's secretly cold and faking all the nice manners because Trauma) and the heroine is trying to make a good match to support her sisters. At first he wants her to be his mistress, but over time he realizes the only way he can have her is by marrying her, and he will do ANYTHING, including some truly crazy shit, to have her. But like, he won't say he loves her lmao.

Preferential Treatment by Heather Guerre--This is the contemporary BDSM romance I read recently. The hero pursues the heroine (who is his employee) to become his professional domme--he doesn't want a conventional (and by this I don't mean vanilla, I mean a relationship that doesn't involve payment) relationship at first but he's definitely the pursuer. He wants to be her slave.

A Wicked Game by Kate Bateman--Historical again, the hero and heroine are from rival families (it's a very lighthearted series, overall) and have always been like... light enemies/rivals. He goes to war and she promises to allow him three kisses if he comes back alive, not taking it very seriously. He does come back, and has resolved to marry her, so those three kisses need to MATTER (and they do).

The Madness of Lord Ian MacKenzie by Jennifer Ashley--Heroine is a widow, hero is a few years younger than her and on the autism spectrum (which has led some to believe he's "mad"). He starts pursuing her soon after meeting her because he can tell she is a Quality Woman and wants to have an affair with her, even though she's about to accept a proposal from another man. He basically introduces himself and sends her a note like "don't marry that loser, you're way too good for his shit". It's HOT.

Lady Isabella's Scandalous Marriage by Jennifer Ashley--Second book in the series, hero is Ian MacKenzie's brother. He and his wife, who he married very impetuously and had a hot as fuck relationship with, have been separated for three years. She bursts into his house to let him know that another artist (he's a famous painter) is pretending to be him, and he's like "God she's still hot as fuck, gotta get her back" and begins aggressively pursuing her. Heads up, they broke up for many reasons but the last straw was a miscarriage.

Twelve Nights as His Mistress by Elisa Braden--A novella, tangentially Christmas. The hero is a grown ass man who has not settled down and married, despite his mother's urging. Instead he's spent the past two years chasing this widow who will like, let him touch her but won't let it go any further because a) she feels guilty that they met before her husband died and, while she never acted on shit, was immediately attracted to the hero and b) she believes herself infertile due to her years of marriage without a baby. The book is the hero proposing a compromise by having her be his mistress for twelve nights... intending to seduce her into marriage, of course.

Surrender to the Devil by Lorraine Heath--Hero is a duke who is going through some shit (he's a big adventurer and artist and is losing his eyesight) and the heroine is a woman who grew up in poverty but made something for herself. He's struck by her beauty and begins aggressively pursuing her to make her his mistress, but that's not good enough for her. TW: the heroine was sexually assaulted as a child. The hero is very tender with her, but he doesn't know until after their first encounter.

Forbidden by Elizabeth Lowell--90s medieval, hero shows up in the heroine's lands with amnesia. She has a mystical situation where she can read what has happened to people when she touches them, but this causes her pain. When she touches him, she does not feel pain, but she knows this is probably because they're soulmates which means they're doomed, among other things. So while he's pretty immediately smitten and aggressively pursues her, she tries to resist in order to protect him... and keep him from finding out that she knows important shit that he's in the dark about. Angst galore, and the fallout is INCREDIBLE. This man... smashes so much shit... It's so hot.

The Perfect Crimes of Marian Hayes by Cat Sebastian--Heroine is actually the hero's stepmother, sorta kinda, but he's a bastard and she doesn't know he's his father's son. He actually begins by blackmailing her. Then she shoots and kills her husband (don't worry, no hard feelings on the hero's part, the husband deserved it) and they go on a rollicking adventure together. He's super flirty and subby, but she's reluctant to give in at first--both because she doesn't want to catch feelings, and because she's super anxious about getting pregnant again due to the very traumatic pregnancy she had with her daughter. They get around it.

Angel in a Devil's Arms by Julie Anne Long--Heroine was the mistress of this douchebag until he died, then went into business with her lover's widow, so she's super skeptical of men. The hero is this rakish type everyone thought was dead until he showed up again. He pursues her heavily, but she's determined to not give in.

A Lady for a Duke by Alexis Hall--Trans heroine who was best friends with the hero before she faked her death during the Battle of Waterloo. Years later, they meet again and the hero has PTSD. At first he doesn't recognize her, but he's already falling by the time he does and once he adjusts to the truth (which doesn't take long) he's back to pursuing her. The heroine rebuffs his advances because she's worried that it won't work, but the hero is dogged about it.

How to Steal a Scoundrel's Heart by Vivienne Lorret--A twist on this, in that the hero is super forthright about wanting a mistress arrangement with the heroine. He's a rake, she's a fallen woman~. He offers her his typical agreement, which is a mistress contract that will last four months exactly. She rebuffs him at first, only to take him up on it later. Obviously, they both catch feelings.

The Heiress Hunt by Joanna Shupe--Hero and heroine were actually friends, but after they grew up they lost touch and he fucked off to Europe for a while. He comes back to America (it's a Gilded Age romance) and finds out that the heroine is about to get engaged (TO THE DUKE OF LOCKWOOD MY LOVE). He basically decides to fuck shit up and aggressively pursue her to break up the engagement, lol. There's a moment when they're in a dark room full of people and he's touching her and shit.... It's good.

The Duke and the Lady in Red by Lorraine Heath--The hero is a debauched duke, and the heroine is a widow who catches his eye. He begins pursuing her heavily for an affair and is obsessed with her. Except oops, plot twist, she's actually not a widow and is in fact a con artist. When he figures it out, he actually just offers her an exorbitant amount of money to spend a week with him because he has things to figure out!!! Actually a very romantic and emotional book.

What I Did for a Duke by Julie Anne Long--A favorite of mine. The hero actually has a scheme in mind at first. The heroine's brother cucked him, so the hero (around 40) plans on ruining the heroine (20) in revenge. But as he pursues her, she quickly figures out what he's doing and begins charming him for real... However, she's into this other guy who is in fact a TOTAL LOSER so. The hero has to put on the charm lmao.

Married by Morning by Lisa Kleypas--This is several books into a series but can be read as a standalone. I'd read the previous books, though. The hero was a washed up wastrel but whipped himself into shape and hired the heroine as a governess for his sisters. They have a banter/enemies to lovers thing in the previous books, but then they share an impetuous kiss and he's like "OOOOOOOOHHHHHH SO THAT'S WHAT WE WERE ACTUALLY DOING" and sets to pursuing her. For many reasons, she resists.

Mine Till Midnight by Lisa Kleypas--First book in the aforementioned series. Heroine is an uptight eldest daughter type, hero is a rakish scoundrel who meets her and is basically like "so I'm going to have you" and just. Sets to that.

Scandalous Desires by Elizabeth Hoyt--The hero pursues the heroine kind of nefariously in this case. She's a widowed Quaker, and they have this sordid past; but he'd left his baby (not hers) on the doorstep of the orphanage she ran, and she's been raising the baby, not knowing it's his. Then shit hits the fan and he kidnaps his own baby to protect her... but really, it's a ploy to get the heroine to stay with him so that he can protect her/seduce her.

Duchess by Day, Mistress by Night by Stacy Reid--Heroine is an icy widowed duchess with a young son. She hires the hero (self made fixer type who grew up poor) to help her out with an issue, and he decides to seduce her.

When He was Wicked by Julia Quinn--Heroine is a widow, the hero is her husband's cousin/best friend. The three of them were all best friends, but the guilt of inheriting everything his cousin had and being in love with said cousin's wife made the hero run off to India (heads up: this isn't great, though the mentions are not super heavy). When he returns years later after no contact with the heroine, she announces that she wants to remarry and have a baby. He basically SNAPS and is like "ohohohohohohoho if this bitch is having ANY baby it's my baby" and deploys his full seducer powers to get into her panties.

I would also recommend checking out Kresley Cole's Immortals After Dark, I made a cheat sheet here. Some of the pairings really start out as them both... not wanting to pursue each other, but a lot of the werewolf guys are. Very. Into. Pursuing. Once they know a woman is the woman for them, nothing--and I mean absolutely motherfucking nothing, not time or space or a husbands--can stop them from being with her in every way.

The best one for pursuit is my favorite in the series:

Pleasure of a Dark Prince--The hero in this one is a werewolf, and the heroine is a valkyrie. As soon as he sees her he knows she's his mate, but she refuses to be with him because she's sworn a vow of chastity that protects her magical archery powers. She goes on a quest across the world in part because it's her job but in part because she's avoiding her attraction to the hero, and he literally... Chases her for a year. Globally. And kills anyone who's trying to hurt her, even when she hurts him to slow him down. I think his line that I love a lot is "she was born to be caught by me" or something like that. TW: heroine was raped by a spouse in the past.