#it was quite literally apart of my childhood lmao

[softyshibu]

Season 3 of Frankenhole is looking good.

/j

[bowieandqueen11]

Resolved Issues / Roman Roy Imagine

Request: HIIIII gonna send my succession request while i still can lol.

how about roman and reader sharing childhood stories? him realising that perhaps, maybe the way his family has treated him is tiny bit Not Normal. the reader being somewhere between "oh my god let me give you a hug" and "i just might fight logan roy in the parking lot". yknow good old hurt/comfort you do it like no other

Thank you so much sweetie!! But also yes I feel this in my soul frick Logan Roy lmao 

Warning: strong language. mentions of diarrhoea and mentions of child abuse/ physical abuse! 

This 3k beast took quite a while to write, so feedback is appreciated! Thank you! :)

(I do not own Succession or its characters, all rights go to creators. Gif credit goes to @loverboyromanroy.)

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°

Roman shrugs his shoulders and looks steadily at you, straight into your eyes.

‘The fuck- how should I know? Like... twenty three, ish?’

Roman’s perching on the edge of his own sofa, so obviously uncomfortable even in his own apartment. His wrist flicks as he answers, and a few drops of the whiskey he hasn’t touched comes sloshing round the side to stain his brand new eggshell blue decorative pillows. He had never cared much for property. But then again, he hadn’t cared much for whiskey either growing up; it had been his father’s drink of choice, and therefore his. The faint fire in the cold marble fireplace behind his head licks between his ears, and illuminates the confused amusement gleaming in his eyes.

You scoff, and shake your head at him incredulously. ‘You own twenty three houses, and you choose to live here?’ Awaiting an answer you know will be even more ridiculous, you make an effort to tuck your legs criss-cross under you, and sit with your knees resting just underneath Roman’s lower legs. ‘And yet you still live in the coldest ass apartment, I swear to god I’m freezing my ass off, and that’s even with the fire going. Are you a fucking yeti or something, Roman Roy?’

He chortles as you continue: ‘you thrive in colder climates, huh? That’s not surprising, considering a glare from your father could freeze hell over.’ You take a final sip of your drink before reaching over and placing it on the sleek black coffee table; Roman’s eyes drop for a split second as if almost in despondency, some kind of deep scarred sorrow peeking its way out like a tired child, before rising back to yours, seeking comfort. It doesn’t slip your attention. You make sure your fingers brush against his socks as you slip your hands back to your lap, and give a sweet squeeze to the tippy toes. He lets out a giggle and kicks his foot out at you, and it’s the most delightful sound you’d ever hear: that true, unadulterated happiness that Roman Roy rarely ever is permitted to have, without some kind of malicious intention lurking behind it.

‘Okay, well, one’, he ostentatiously holds a finger up by twirling it in the air, and it takes you a second to realise he’s pointedly showing you his middle finger. ‘Fuck you. Two-’, he decides to count with his pinkie finger, ‘my dad owns twenty three hours, I own approximately zero fucking squilch of that. And three, I’m a fucking incredible designer - see that Feng Shui over there? All me baby, I would have fucking killed it as an interior design.’

‘Having one sad as fuck looking potted plant by the window and literally no personal items doesn’t count as Feng Shui, dumbass. You’re just sad.’

‘Okay - well - if you’re such a smartass-’, Roman winds his hands up by his head but nearly lets the crystal glass his brother had bought him for his last birthday fall onto the hardwood floor, so he grimaces and gently places it on the rug. He turns back to glance at you, and despite the fact he’s positioning himself as if he’s conducting an interview: elbows resting on knees with hands clasped out before him, face set in stone, he still looks intent and truthfully curious about the answer he’s hoping you’ll give. ‘What was your childhood home like then? I’m sure full of unicorns that shart rainbows and fucking fairies that sneeze glitter from the way you hate my deco.’

You pause to think for a minute, not fully expecting such an honest question to come from Roman Roy. You place a finger gingerly against your lip, and in that second, perched up on the edge of the pristine settee, Roman wishes he could just leap over and replace your fingertip with his lips. He had never been so entranced by someone: never had the privilege of knowing someone from this corporate world who would be so truthful, so different from him. And yet, at the same time, someone who so deliciously, so crudely, so cruelly reminded him of the young child locked in the cage within his heart: so unknowingly let him cling onto the little bit of him he had tried to keep alive. The only bit of him left that wasn’t a Roy. That was just Roman.

Yet, even in the hope that clouded his mind as he awaited your answer, your words came like slices to slit against his throat. ‘Well, I suppose my home was... well, not to sound pedestrian, or super corny, but it was a happy one?’ He nodded, content to bleed out in front of you. ‘There was usually a lot of laughter, and of course a lot of stress, but you know. We could all rely on each other. It was... yeah, it was nice.’ You stop, biting your bottom lip and switching your legs around so you could raise them up and pull them against your chest. 

You didn’t want to look at the man sitting before you suddenly. It was as if he had regressed into himself as you went along: withering, shivering slightly like a frosty chill over an empty playground. It looked - it felt unnatural, as he stared at you without seeing. He blinked languidly for a moment, soaking in your words, before jutting his bottom lip out and trying his best to grin at you. ‘Well, my childhood wasn’t so horrid either. My brother took me and Ken camping once, and although it was fucking sleeting down like bullets of pure fucking ice down by the stream, Connor did eat a fish that looked like a mouldy shoe and spent most of the night running off into the woods holding his ass.’

He snorts then, his little high pitched hyena laugh bubbling out of him as he places the back of his hand against his lips to try and hold it in, and you can’t help but laugh along with him at the sorry image of the supposed Roy brother patriarch scuttling around like a crab with diarrhoea. 

‘That’s sweet, but do you have any other actual memories with your family where someone isn’t being ridiculed?’

‘Woah, hey-’, he holds both his hands up, and slides down from the armrest to come sit in front of you. ‘When you meet my brother, you’ll understand that he deserves it.’ You flush slightly at the implication, becoming rather uncharacteristically bashful around Roman, and glancing quickly down between your legs. Pulling at a thread until it becomes loose, you pray the timid fire glow is enough to hide from him the rushing heat crawling up your neck. Due to the fact that Roman also is shyly looking down at the toes he’s currently wiggling to busy himself, you both miss the way the other is blushing. 

‘But...uh’, he starts finally after a moment of contemplation: a blessed few minutes of serendipitous indulgence, of growing warmth and familiarity, and just enough time for the two of you to realise how much your presence and conversation had only furthered endeared the two of you to each other, despite the hint of sadness that laced it. 

‘I really - I mean, my dad was like, always busy.’ He scratches the back of his head, embarrassed by the way you tilt your head and look quizzically at him. He becomes hyper aware of how close his knee is to resting against yours, and decides to swallow the fear that seems to be clogging up the back of his throat, and shuffles forward until there’s finally contact. ‘And my brother was like, following in his footsteps and all that jazz’, his eyes widen as he holds his hands out by his side. ‘So there wasn’t really much time for... fun, I guess. Or mistakes. Or family.’

It breaks your heart to watch him deflate once he finishes speaking, and suddenly the austere, cold walls and empty, hollow halls of his apartment make all the more sense. He looks so worn out, so tired of having to hide himself away behind a big, empty mansion full of props and antiques and nothingness all put out for show, because that’s what he was. That’s how he saw himself. A big, empty, tired, twisted puppet trying to bend over backwards to escape the marionette strings of daddy’s love, not realising they’re choking him. It was a strategy, a way to protect himself: to become placid, to mask yourself as being one of them, to fit in with his father’s lifestyle, and maybe then the slaps and strikes and kicks and whimpers would feel like something good. Because he’s trying to be just like his father. So if he’s hit, it’s only because the puppet hasn’t quite danced to the right tune, that’s all. 

As you glance around, you finally begin to notice how unused all the furniture in Roman’s apartment looks: the cellarette by the bar that looks as if it had been varnished yesterday, to the large screen television on the either side of the elongated room that Roman clearly only put on once a night to watch the news, to the velvet cushioned armchair positioned to sweep out and look across the skyline of the city, yet the headrest didn’t even have a dent. All these things. All this barrenness. It made you sick to your stomach. Here he was: a toy left on the shelf to collect dust, taken out to play with only when it suited the puppet master, and he was still so desperate for love that he still tried to copy his father. 

And you could see from the way his eyes were beginning to turn blood shot as he slowly sat there and turned the cogs in the back of his brain over, that this was a thought he had had many times before.

You try your best not to look at him too pitifully, in case he might take offence and retreat back into his shell again when you hold out your hands to him. He swallows thickly, watching your every movement as your fingers unfurl over his knees, and you signal at him to come closer. For a moment, as he squints his eyes at you, he seems tentative. But then you roll your eyes, trying your best to still seem casual, and flutter your fingers at him again. 

It takes less than a second for him to latch on this time, and his fingers grip into the sides of your skin so tightly you’re afraid he may draw blood. But then, you suppose, that’s all he’s been familiarised with.

‘It’s fine, I’m fine’, he tries to shrug it off, but his fingers only squeeze into yours all the more desperately. Worried he’ll try and pull away if you keep them suspended between your touching knees, you slowly pull them down to rest on your lap as he continues talking. He begins to play with your fingers almost subconsciously, looping them through his stout ones. ‘I mean, sure, my earliest memory is Shiv trying to drown me in the pool because she didn’t want so many older brothers to take all of daddy’s attention away from her. And Ken was never really present, dad was always shipping him away to some conference training or having him sit at his feet like his lap dog, but it’s fine. I’m fine. I grew up to be a well adjusted adult without any concerning issues at all.’

Although his tone is mocking, once he’s finished his rambling thought he lets go of your hand to rub his eyes. He does a half-yawn to try and cover the fact that they’re becoming rather bleary - to hide the fact that this is beginning to get at him, actually. And he’d rather stop now, if that’s alright. He’s the jokester in the family. The happy man. The go to cheer-upper. The pathetic one. He didn’t want to cry. He didn’t want to cry in front of you. He was never allowed to cry.

He jumps when he feels your hand against his knee, and he sniffles slightly when he looks down and sees you’ve leaned closer towards him. ‘And your dad?’, you ask quietly, cautiously, pulling the hand of his you were still holding tightly into your sternum. ‘What was he like growing up?’

‘Well, I was annoying. I- I am annoying, so, you know-’

He chokes then, and this time he can’t stop the sob that breaks out from the back of his throat like an overdue bell chime.

‘I’m annoying. I’m fucking annoying, you know that?’, he chokes out between sobs, doubling over on himself, but he’s still laughing between each gasping breathe. ‘I’m such a piece of shit’, he states, doing his best to stop his lip from wobbling and the tears from clouding out of his eyes, but he doesn’t complain when you take your hand off his lap and guide it to the small of his back, just before the dip in his shoulder blades. Gently - ever so gently, as if you were cradling a new born child still so unused to human touch, you guide him down to lie on your legs. He goes easily, taking his hands back to lean them under his chin, and allowing you full utility of your fingers. You put them to good use, beginning to stoke back stray curls of his mother’s hair away from his face, tucking them behind his ear until his breathing evens again.

He watches the sun fall over the edge of the Waystar Royco building: a sight he has seen many times before, but one that feels all the more eerie as the slates of dark metal blot out the light like a flashy tomb.

You bring him back, pursing your lips together and trying not to laugh sorrowfully as he sneezes at the feel of your finger moving down his forehead to trace over the dip of his nose, and evidently tickle it. You move onto the curve of his left eye, and it fills you with at least a little comfort to notice the way he squeezes his eyes shut at the movement. What was less welcome, though, were the few pearly tears that slipped past the cracks of his eyes and began to trace down the old bruised shaped hollows of his cheeks.

‘God Roman’, you choke out, trying to gently turn his head so he’s looking up at you. For a moment, he throws a tantrum and shakes his head in refusal, but your fingers are unrelenting and all forgiving against the side of his jaw, and soon he can’t help but give in to the love he’s so desperately begging for. He allows you to turn him, still squirming in your touch, until the two of you make eye contact. And there’s such naivety there, such desire and craving and conviction and belief as he keeps his eyes trained wholly on yours, that the words just come tumbling out of your mouth.

‘I’m going to fight your whole family I swear. I’m going to fight them all, one by one, and then take over Waystar, maybe find out what the fuck is going on between this Cousin of yours and Shiv’s husband’, he chortles at that, and chokes a little, ‘and then the two of us can burn the place to the ground and ride off into the sunset.’

Although he feels only elation at your words, he starts to shake when you use the pads of his thumbs to gently, tenderly wipe the tears away from beside his nose.

‘Stop, please’, he whimpers, but you know he’s not talking about your physical actions. ‘My dad’s never going to die, even if he is gone. Just- just- get out while you can, okay? Just fucking run.’ He grabs up at your hands, and holds onto one intently. ‘Just fucking go, okay, because I will destroy you. I’m- fucking poison, alright?’

‘No, no’, you state more firmly, when you see the creases in his forehead begin to appear. He shakes his head, and his whole face crinkles up when you admit the one thing left unspoken between the two of you.

‘You - you’re worth it. You’re worth putting up with all of this for, Roman Roy. One day, you’ll be free, and we’ll get to make new memories. Better ones.’

‘Just shut up. Shut the fuck up. Please. Just-’

His words die out on his mouth when you lean down swiftly and replace them with your waiting lips. His hand falls from where it was encircling your wrist, and after a moment of stunned shock, comes up to press firmly against the nape of your neck. His widened eyes melt slowly into a blissful, languid close, and despite the fact that he has no fucking idea how to actually kiss someone he cares about, he does a mighty good job of latching onto your bottom lip and whimpering when you go to pull away.

‘You promise’, he whispers into the tense air between the tip of your nose and the side of his stubble. He leans up to kiss you again, and a bite of saltiness stings at your mouth. ‘You promise’, he murmurs again as he opens his mouth, refusing to break away from the kiss: instead breathing you in and licking the tip of his tongue against your own. Steadying yourself, you grip onto his biceps, and press a last, ardent kiss to his mouth by latching onto his top lip.

‘I swear, Roman, I swear to god I’m going to make up for all the lack of love your family has given you. And I’ll start right now.’

[antiyourwokehomophobia2]

I guess I want to appeal to your compassion a bit as a trans person. Fsr I got recommended a post where you put forward the idea that transness is caused by trauma, and also maybe that it’s annoying/laughable to you. I probably couldn’t objectively say whether childhood trauma contributed to my dysphoria because everyone feels and does lots of things for reasons they can never be fully aware of. Transition alleviated the distress I felt extremely significantly though. If it is all a trauma response (which has not been properly methodologically demonstrated by anyone afaik, except for you afaict deciding correlation = causation while reading peoples personal anecdotes that they texted you, ig?) I’m just not clear on why that matters if transitioning has helped the person, or why people who are traumatized are worthy of having that trauma derided or picked apart. I would hope that would inspire some amount of empathy instead. I don’t know if this was worth the time it took to type out because it seems like maybe the algorithm or something has really sold you on certain ideas about trans people as a monolith that I think are more reflective of tiny microcosms of teen internet subcultures than of broader reality.

Oh boy lmao.

Well, I would have loved if you had linked the post. I'm not really certain what you're referring to, and I can't imagine what I would have said to make you think I was calling any type of trauma annoying or laughable? But oh well.

"if it's all a trauma response...I'm just not clear on why it matters if transitioning has helped the person"

Anon, do you feel this way about anorexia? Anorexia is also often caused by trauma. Do you have a hard time understanding why people do not support liposuction for anorexic people? After all, if it's all a trauma response...I'm just not clear on why it matters if weight loss has helped the person. Isn't that right? Why should things like alcoholism or drug abuse or self harm receive push back if it helps the person doing it? The only difference between being trans and literally any other condition where people hate their bodies is social perception. How is being obsessed with having or removing breasts not the same as being obsessed with weight loss?

"why people who are traumatized are worthy of having that trauma derided or picked apart"

Why is having trauma picked apart a bad thing? Therapy, as a profession, is literally focused on picking apart trauma and replacing it with rational thoughts. I'm not quite sure what you mean by this honesty? If trauma isn't picked apart then the only other option is leaving in place. Is that really the world you want to live in? A place where people who are obviously struggling never receive any pushback for decisions that are borne from those struggles? I think we have different thoughts on what does and does not help those who are traumatized. Anon, you sound a bit like an enabler.

"I would hope that would inspire some amount of empathy instead"

Of course I have empathy!! However, being empathetic does not mean that I should just be okay with whatever traumatized people decide to do with themselves. Do you think it lacks empathy to say that a suicidal person shouldn't kill themselves? I mean, having someone pour their heart out to you about how much they want to die only to tell them "you should live anyway" could come across as being very insensitive. But that displays the opposite of lack of empathy. How is it not empathetic to tell someone "hey, I know you're hurting but cutting off parts of your body and injecting yourself with drugs is not the answer"? Why does that strike you as cruel? Transitioning is a lifelong endeavor. How is it lacking empathy to say "hey, you shouldn't opt to spend your life as a neverending medical patient"?

"maybe the algorithm or something has really sold you on certain ideas about trans people as a monolith that I think are more reflective of tiny microcosms of teen internet subcultures than of broader reality."

Well, jeez! Those microcosm teens have a lot of power! I mean, fuck, biological males in women's sports? Women getting fired from their jobs for saying that males are men? Kamala Harris having *genuinely* been under fire for putting males in male prisons? Women being called bigots and facing extreme social consequences for being uncomfortable with male people in their changing rooms and bathrooms? Those teens that do not affect broader reality are supremely powerful! I'm impressed!

[jalluzas-ferney]

Soooo….I made some nationality headcannons! At first I was a liiittle bit unsure if to do so cuz then again.. they live in ninjago…. And im pretty sure countries like argentina or Morocco don’t quite exist in the ninjago universe LMAO. Butttttt. Already seen others make headcannons, so hell, why not? I uses they apply to some irl au or what if they lived in our world uk? And what different countries would I see them coming from and etc.

I can imagine that the EM might have travelled all over the world, either to go into hiding, or missions, or escape conflict, etc. Or maybe simply that’s where they came from! So yeah that’s my little explanation that is mostly for myself cuz im a little bit too literal sometimes lol.

When thinking about nationality I always think a lot about where they grew up and what nationality they grew up with and would later on identify with the most. It’s a complicated concept when your parents are from a different nationality and theyre immigrants in a different country- so you grow up in this country, surrounded by this culture and people, but your. Also. Raised by your parents who also have your family living in this completely different country- where you also find home and relate to the people considering how you look, the language you speak with your parents- or the specific culture and environment your parents grew up wiooith, impacting your home life and the way your raised. Perhaps you lived in both places, or travel a lot to your parents homeland. Perhaps you live in one of your parents countries but the other. Not. but you still identify with one of your parents nationality because of the rest of your family from that side and the culture your take in from them. So it’s always very personal! So for Kai and Nya, I imagined that ray was Argentinian and Maya Filipino. And perhaps - because I want to project onto my faves- they were born and grew up in Argentina. But have always also identified a lot with their mothers homeland, since not only does their race impact the way they might feel more different and set apart from kids there, maya loves talking about her childhood in the Philippines and is always talking over the phone with their aunts and cousins, meaning Kai and Nya def were taught some Tagalog, tho theyre not incredibly fluid with it. In their early teens they probably travelled to the Philippines, (took ray and maya some time to settle down and get enough money to travel, as well as find time) and met their whole family, and the place they reside in, habit that would turn quite common as they would continue to travel other times the following years.

For Lloyd, I really wanted to make him Asian -Brazilian. It just felt right. So imagined that my queen (don’t you judge her >:() Misako would be Brazilian, meanwhile Garmadon,Japanese. i imagine that Misako adores traveling, so she met Garmadon on her trip to Japan, and decided to stay there for a WHILE because of the brothers. During her time there, she had Lloyd. Since her family heard of her new baby, she travelled back to Brazil with a two y/o Lloyd to have her family meet the him and catch up overall. but as the serpentine wars rose In japan (ill hc it happened in japan let me know what u think of that) Misako was told to wait in Brazil. Misako didn’t really like that though, and while she dreaded having to leave her son, she was sure shed come back soon after helping out the Brothers in the battle against the serpentine. So Lloyd was left to live with his aunties and grandparents in Brazil. Of course, after Misako found out about the whole Green Ninja thing and all that crap, she pulled the same stunt as in the series and ✨ vanished ✨. But then Garmadon came and fucking took him like divorced parents sometimes do uk? So then he spent some other of his childhood years growing up in, ya guessed it, Japan. This is how Lloyd identifies both with being a Brazilian and Japanese. As for the rest, I just envision that they lived in their respective countries their whole lives till they were recruited!

[kaeyapilled]

hey! your kaeya takes are so real!!! I was wondering if you had any good fic recs?? I want to read something that has good kaeya characterization (+bonus if it's ragbros that isn't just them crying and hugging it out like you were talking about) and am tired of scrolling through tags

!! omg thank you im so honored to hear that people like my takes lol

fic recs huh!! i have some!! do you mind it if most of them are about child kaeya? (i hadnt realized how many of my bookmarks focused on his childhood until i went through them all lmao) hopefully it isnt all stuff youve already read before! here goes:

A Horse Makes for a Stable Life by FollowerofMercy – Wanting to test the boundaries of his host’s goodwill, Kaeya asks for a pony for his birthday. He didn’t expect Crepus to deliver. Or, the story in which things get uncomfortably real for young Kaeya.

do you like kaeya and crepus interactions!! because this fic explores their dynamic in suuuuch a nice way that felt very refreshing to see portrayed!! perfect ratio of hurt to comfort in my opinion. overall quite lighthearted compared to my other recs though lol. good exploration of kaeyas inner conflict since a young age. yeah i love it and recommend it

I'm gonna miss your love when it's gone by imaginarypasta – A selection of scenes from Kaeya's childhood related to his relationships with his fathers, and all they have led him to be.

this one is so good!!!! i feel like its rare to see kaeyas biological father portrayed as anything other than a heartless asshole, and this fic explored kaeyas relationship with him in such a nice manner that makes for a very melancholic and. i guess bittersweet story that takes into consideration the nuance of the situation in a way that i really dont see super often. the parts about kaeyas relationship w crepus are also really well done i love it. oh and the khaenri'ah lore the author takes some liberty with is really really interesting!!

not bad for a walk on death's doorstep by b_attery – Fear is a knife’s edge. Fear is a killer. Fear is how you know you’re still alive.

my bookmark of this work said "literally the best kaeya character study ive ever read" and honestly i still stand by that. the word flow is great and the exploration of fear as such an intrinsic part of kaeya's life and as the driving force for most of his actions and feelings and responses. it's so good!!! this one contemplates kaeyas childhood both before and after his arrival in mondstadt and goes until after diluc's return. absolutely recommend it!!

Hundred-Watt Light by pepperjuice – A story about ten years of contingency plans and holding your own hand. (Because how else are you supposed to live with a weight too big to hold all alone?)

this. this rewired my brain forever. this holds the title of best kaeya character study ever along with the previous one i talked about. definitely mind the tags because it primarily deals with suicidal ideation and thoughts so, if that's a trigger then it's best to not read this one lol but still it is SO good and it explores kaeya's inner conflicts and awful coping mechanisms after having such a heavy burden thrusted upon him at an extremely early age with no good support of any kind. i absolutely love this fic it's very dear to me and i think about it sooo often it truly altered my brain chemistry

things fall apart by kernsing – Happy eighteenth, Diluc.

finally some ragbros content! sadly it isnt the reconciliation you asked for it's about when things fell apart. this is one of my favorite ever renditions of how it all went down on That Day - it reshaped some of my own headcanons, actually. this one is more from diluc's pov than kaeya's, and it's written really really well, and explores diluc's grief over his father's death in SUCH an amazing and interesting way!! and the way it parallels kaeya's own emotions and that is exactly what causes them to fight is extremely tasty i loved it. read it it's good

okay i can probably find some more but this is enough for one post i think. deeply sorry for not delivering the good ragbros reconciliation content.. i tbh haven't gathered a lot.. but i hope you and whoever else reads this enjoys these! thank you for the ask <3

[panoffrying]

okok so ummmmm ,,, this took me a while to write down bc i fucking SUCK at writing down my thoughts in actually coherent ways so i hope this all makes sense:

i think sozo's sorta the black sheep where he comes from . a lot of stuff abt ants is usually abt how BRUTAL they are toward other ant colonies , literally ripping each other apart an kidnapping babies n shit . so i think sozo's colony was sort of like that—very warrior-oriented with not much space for anything else . then there was sozo , who didn't have Any interest in fighting or anything to do with battle , instead WAY more interested in fungi an stuff

in his colony (and in others) fungi r generally treated as life-threatening pests , since EVERY ant ever knows tha horrifying tale of cordyceps an how they'll rip apart a colony from tha inside out n whatnot . most of sozo's colony just thinks his fascination with fungi is simply a childhood phase , that he'll get over it n realize how dangerous they are , but he doesn't because it's NOT A PHASE , MOM !!!!!!!! he wants to be a MYCOLOGIST , not a WARRIOR !!!!!!

(his colony is also in silk cradle . i forgot to mention that so i'm putting that here)

so sozo ends up leaving his home as a young adult after growing up as a social outcast , wanting to pursue his own dreams instead of just listening to whatever his queen wanted . he eventually Does become a mycologist an one day , ends up at shamura's grand temple to add his knowledge of fungi to their great library , which is when they first officially meet each other . at first it's a fairly generic follower meeting his god type thing , but after a while of talking their conversations slowly get more casual an they begin regarding each other as friends , an then eventually Close friends . maybe they could've become more if sozo hadn't gone off to anura , discovered those mushroomos, and ,,, well . you know what happens to him .

eventually shamura forgets about sozo (since this all takes place After narinder's betrayal) but they occasionally get a strange , yearning feeling ,,, like someone used to come to them everyday to talk about ,,, something. they can't quite remember what , though ...

it's only after the lamb takes over , when shamura is indoctrinated and sozo gets brought back from the dead (then promptly goes through rehab) that they meet again . shamura doesn't quite recall sozo an he only vaguely remembers them , but they still like to hang out together , especially as shamura's head injury slowly stabilizes into something more manageable for them . shamura likes to hear him talk abt his studies , and sozo likes having an attentive audience . they're really good friends who also maybe wanna kiss (but shamura isn't willing to unpack THOSE emotions yet bc they have weird feelings abt romantic relationships after that whole fiasco with their ex a few millennia ago but sssshhhhhh)

anyway that's abt it :3 i'm just realizing it kinda dipped into sozura toward the end there but ehhhhh that's still TECHNICALLY a sozo headcanon if u squint so

SORRY I TOOK SO LONG TO ANSWER THIS MY LIFE GOT A BIT CHAOTIC BUT YOOOOOOOOO OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH EEEEEEE I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS!

It’s very different from other sozo headcanons and I like that a lot. I like to imagine for your headcanons sozonius is literally like hiccup from how to train your dragon lmao. To be fair he might know some self defense based on how he was raised.

I like the idea that sozonius colony was in silk cradle in which I have it in my headcanons that after Narinders banishment silk cradle becomes the most dangerous land of war, just killing without thinking. God bless Sozonius for making it through their bro💀🙏

AND YOU KNOW ME IM ALWAYS A SUCKER FOR THAT SOZURA FOOD. I really like the idea of sozonius meeting Shamura before sozonius went to Anura. THE BUGS ARE BESTIES a bishop and a mortal ant.

Bro my heart of thinking of Shamura remembering sozo in random moments and wondering where he is, then having to be explained to that Sozonius went missing years ago, before forgetting him again AGH MY SOUL!!! THE POTENTIAL HERE

I ADORE THIS SO MUCH THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME ABOUT YOUR HEADCANONS! Seeing this stuff inspires me and I love being able to interact with yall💜

[topazadine]

OC Fun Facts Tag

Thanks for the tag, @illarian-rambling! I particularly liked that your villain has a New Jersey accent lmao.

I'll do five fun facts for each of my main characters.

Uileac Korviridi

His favorite Bremish festival (predictably) is Feast of the Horse, particularly the mounted archery competition. I mean duh. He makes everyone else look like pathetic losers.

He doesn't have much of a sweet tooth, but Cerie does, so their house is usually filled with all manner of sweets.

Uileac has a bunch of weird little rituals he does before battle, like making sure he has an even number of arrows (lucky) and brushing his horse Erix's armor with blessed oils. I mean, I guess they've worked? He hasn't died yet ....

One would expect such a dextrous man would play an instrument, but he doesn't, he's too busy to learn. Though he thinks the fiddle is pretty cool.

If he did not have his beloved palomino mare Erix, he'd probably want a dapple gelding.

Orrinir Relickim

Even though he went through all the same training as Uileac did, Orrinir has never figured out how to fire a bow. No amount of training seems to make it stick.

His favorite Bremish festival is the Feast of Saint Mermina, where people throw flower votives of the saint into the water and swimmers try to retrieve them. Every damn year, Uileac intentionally designs his so they fall apart, but poor Orrinir tries anyway.

Orrinir LOVES to bake. He's very proud of his manly and cool creations in the kitchen. You know, like little apple dumplings shaped like hearts. Incredibly manly. Very brave.

Because he does not drink much, Orrinir is a total lightweight. As such, he typically is the responsible non-drinker who escorts his mildly drunk husband Uileac and embarrassingly drunk sister-in-law Cerie home.

Orrinir has been known to play around with a mini piano (kalimba) on occasion, usually when bored out in the field. He likes it because you don't really need any musical knowledge to get it to work.

Haniya Aina

Haniya is EXACTLY what you think when you think "horse girl." Kinda snobby, convinced that she has a unique bond with horses that no one else in the world could ever fathom, and obsessed with the latest and greatest in tack trends. Her horse Saelsie has tack that costs more than most peoples' houses, and can you blame her? Girlie is a literal princess.

Because her mother, Queen Susuma, was essentially absent throughout her childhood, Haniya was raised by governesses and teachers.

She loves music boxes and has quite a collection. Diplomats who want to get in her mother's good graces know to bring Haniya a pretty music box for her trouble. One of her favorites has a mechanical dancing horse.

Haniya's brother, Prince Daiski, was meant to learn fencing, but Haniya, who actually wanted to learn it, was told it wasn't a "women's skill." As such, she lied to Daiski about when his practices were supposed to be and showed up instead, threatening the instructor into silence. Those were her favorite childhood memories.

Her favorite books are about faraway lands, especially travel logs of distant places. Any time that a diplomat comes to visit her mother, she corners them and picks their brain.

Ono Kagan

Ono, being deeply socially awkward, is more comfortable around animals than people. Even animals that he's rather scared of, like dogs.

His first romantic/sexual relationship is with his wife, Vinanna, who is charmed by how sweet and shy he is. YES! The pathetic virgin gets the pretty girl!

The average Sinan outside of the upper classes is illiterate, but Ono taught himself after becoming a royal guard by taking shifts guarding the library. There, he read the children's books that Haniya and her siblings would have been told as children before working his way up to more difficult texts.

His most prized possession is his sword, Melikik ("the sea cutter"), made by his father, a blacksmith.

Ono can't hold his liquor. Like at all.

Mordrek Willets

Mordrek is somehow both the straightest and the least homophobic person in all of Sina. Gay men serve as great wingmen, and lesbians can teach him even more ways to romance a beautiful woman. Bisexuals? Why, he admires anyone who has enough eyes to ogle both sides.

He considers his mule, Carrot, to be his best friend and closest confidante. Carrot gets the best of everything, even when Mordrek can't afford to feed himself.

His greatest fear is heights. Maybe that's why Queen Susuma keeps sending him to high-altitude places.

Mordrek is agnostic. He jokes that all the gods probably hate him, so he doesn't want to believe they exist.

Though Mordrek gambles on occasion, he only plays games that he knows he can win with his wiles. Or by paying someone to fix the game for him.

Cerie Korviridi

Cerie is one of the most irritating overachievers you will ever meet. When she's working on something, you better leave her alone or you're going to get your head bit off.

Sometimes she likes to daydream about what she would have been if she didn't become a High Poet. Her top three alternate professions are horse trainer, potter, and leatherworker.

Cerie is messy af and is always forgetting where she put stuff. Orrinir yells at her about it all the time.

She's a night owl, which is unusual in a country that doesn't have artificial light like Breme. She just likes it when all the world is asleep and she can focus on whatever she wants to do.

Her favorite festival is the Feast of Snow Lights, where people go around and recite two-line traditional poems; if the homeowner misremembers it, they have to give the guest a drink. She, of course, has them all memorized, but sometimes she'll come up with her own just to screw with people, and then they have to call a "truce" and both give each other something.

Tagging @drchenquill, @the-golden-comet, @mysticstarlightduck, @davycoquette, and open tag

[starbuckaroo]

Sorry I know this is going around a lot rn but anyone who wants to say ANYTHING about bad parenting on this show and wants to talk about Eddie mf Diaz can eat a fucking dick UNLESS they can show me they’re not being hypocritical and can show me their posts that rip Athena apart. Fucking hell.

I will preface this by acknowledging that ofc there’s absolutely no way I can know what it’s like to be a black woman raising a black child. I never can. I do have some personal experience with raising a black boy in the US, though, so the episodes with Harry have always hit me really really hard, and usually because I always want to mcfucking scream at Athena for the way she allows her career indoctrination to harm her children.

Yeah my main gripe with this show always always boils down to “Athena quit your job” bc I can’t stand her anymore tbh. She would have stayed an interesting character IF at some point in s4-5 thereabouts she started to have doubts about the system and they did something interesting with that

OR

If they would allow the literal actual conflicts of interest to crop up and let her be a fucking antagonist. Let Bobby struggle with his ethical evaluation of a scene and his marital obligations. Let May struggle with learning and growing away from her childhood home and wrestle with what her mom continues to do. And let that storyline with Harry this season actually carry the fucking heavy and heinous weight that it truly has. It turns my stomach honestly like I had to stand up and walk away, and let me sister tell me when it was over so I could go sit back down.

But the apologism is what is so unforgivable. Like don’t get me wrong, I love the hell out of this show and it’s my full on hyperfixation and has been for years, but its top billed character has been nigh unwatchable for most of the last few seasons. The narrative trying to sell me that she’s one of the protagonists, that she doesn’t have to struggle meaningfully at all about what she does for a living or to her family, and I’m supposed to swallow that without protest? Nah. Can’t happen.

I liked her character a lot in the first three seasons tbh against my better judgment! I was expecting to hate her from day one but I was sold, actually. Michael leaving the show kind of tanked her character, I think, maybe. I think it was their dynamic that made her interesting at first, and then sympathetic later on when she really was trying to make their blended unconventional family work despite her upbringing. But honestly once Harry aged into teenagerdom and Michael left and May graduated it meant there was like…nothing left about Athena that was interesting except her job except that’s actually the worst part about her lmao woopsies.

Anyways. Let Athena be a villain or at least an antagonist. That would fix everything tbh. It would make her interesting again, it would be in character given how many ethical messes she’s caused or been party to, and would allow the show to keep doing their dumb copaganda shit that they’re almost certainly contractually obligated to shove in at least once per season. But it would finally be interesting because it wouldn’t feel like I was being asked to swallow bullshit covered in glitter spray. Maybe they could explore her toxic relationship with her mother and how engaging so heavily and perpetually with respectability politics has done damage to herself (and her parents and her ex husband and her children) over the years. Maybe her magical fairytale white lady boss at the precinct can actually act in character for once and pls god I would just like. I would sell a kidney for a real and honest Athena Quit Your Job plotline. Fuck. They could even take the coward’s way out like they did with Eddie’s military service and just have her quit for some random reason so ethics never actually has to be part of the conversation but neither would we have to deal with the copaganda all the time. You know Angela Bassett would act the fuck out of that kind of complicated character. It would be a real conflict instead of whatever contrived nonsense they’ve been putting on her this season.

Anyways this really fucking got away from me but I’m just not willing to hear a fucking WORD against single dad Eddie fucking Diaz unless the speaker has already done their bit about Athena and they’re just making their way through the line.

Except

I don’t actually want that bc We Know Why they’re saying that shit about Eddie and if they ever opened their mouth about Athena I don’t even really have to wonder about what sort of racist bullshit might fall out. Those aren’t the people I want attempting to critique Athena Grant. So actually yeah can everyone just shut the fuck up.

Myself included.

[adambja]

Hey, so I got into spirituality a while ago and I am also have adhd and derealization. I started treatment for that and I know you are probably not a medical professional. But I wanted to ask you anyway, if you have any tipps to be present and feel oneness. I had short phases already, where I had no thoughts and it was the best thing ever. I also had my first few manifestations. Since I am an empath I take so much negative energy from other people in. I am either totally stressed out or completly at peace. I feel like I am improving so much but at the same time it feels like my life is falling apart.

Thank you for your content and your help in advance.

(Also English is not my first language.)

Hey,

Also why did you even assume I am not a medical professional? You don't know anything about me like how am I a neurologist or even a psychologist 💀?!

I literally opened a clinic and then turned down the whole thing after it was half way done because it will take too much time from my life

This was personal so anyways lmao

First of all,

Don't go to a therapist/psychiatrist

Pick a good psychologist for yourself, we are better! most of the time you don't need any medication also you wanted to ask me anyway about the tips to feel present and oneness....!

Work on your self-concept

You can buy the packages I have with coaching since you are already diagnosed with something you will get somehow an extra discount!

Use these affs

- I live in the present moment

- I am in the present moment

Also that empath thing - it's not even real

It's mostly because of your childhood and your parents

Like this sh is literally made up - it describes how you feel and it's just there for you to understand what state are you in BUT NOT to identify yourself with "I am an empath" so quit it you didn't meet the actual YOU yet!

You just didn't work on your self-concept

And when you are talking about taking bad energies from people!!

I mean people don't exist!! Then where are these energies are coming from?? It's you creating it JUST ASSUME THE BEST in fact you can't feel anyone's feelings - you can decide their feelings but you can't take it inside of you or feel it instead of them!

Nothing is actually real

This physical reality isn't real

What is real is your imagination

Did you read about eiypo? Read about it (the right ones pls not the wrong ones)

Did you read the law of assumptions post on my pinned post? Read it

You are literally manifesting all this and you just didn't have your first manifestation baby everything in your life is literally a manifestation!

That's it

Your life feels like it's falling apart because you feel like you are out of control THAT'S WHY I MADE THIS TAPE FOR EVERYONE CAUSE THEY NEEDED IT!! 💀

Because I already know what most of the people in this world is i made a lot of researches and that's another reason why you see many successes from this tape yes they aren't just the affs they are benefits too! So yeah!!

You are very welcome baby!

I would love to talk to you in my DMs due to your situation! Cause you really have something different!

I really hope you never stop getting better and I hope you stop identifying yourself with something that's not really you! I want you to move on to another level to find out who are you fr without all of this!

It's all about self-concept

[rune-tisms]

I NEED TO KNOW THE BACKSTORY OF REESE PLEASE

NO WAY OMG SOMEONE CARES ABT MY STUPID INSERT OC IM SO HAPPYYYY

i literally wrote a whole google doc about him i’ll just paste it here lmao

cw for a suicide attempt (not detailed though)

reese has lived in gotham for his whole life, but when his parents died in a car crash when he was 12 years old, he was promptly moved to the gotham city orphanage. it was there that he met edward nashton. they didn’t immediately become friends, as reese had become quite the trouble maker and frequently got into fights with the other children, but edward warmed up to him eventually. reese was the only one who actually spoke kindly to edward, which caused edward to get somewhat attached to him. once they became friends, reese quickly got very attached to edward and they were practically inseparable. reese even stopped getting into fights and found himself able to better cope with his loss due to having edward around. they would remain friends until reese was 16; their friendship would end with a nasty argument that removed both of them from speaking terms. it would begin with edward wishing for some space from reese, and reese feeling hurt by this and lashing out by accusing edward of being the reason he has no other friends at the orphanage, and from there it would just get worse and worse until it ended with both of them storming away from each other and never speaking or even being within 5 feet of each other ever again.

reese would go on to immediately join the workforce, never keeping jobs for long but making enough money to afford a shitty apartment in the slums of gotham. his mental health declined significantly and he even attempted suicide when he was 23, but was unsuccessful. the trip to the hospital caused him to become even less financially stable, so he had to take up multiple jobs at the same time, and this in turn worsened his mental health even more. he scraped by every day, barely a shell of a person, until one day he stumbled across one of the riddler’s online clues and managed to get into his community. reese found hope in the riddler’s promise of a real change, and found himself obsessing over who the person behind the mask really was. riddler had practically saved his life by pulling him out of his depressive stupor, so naturally his damaged brain latched onto him and pulled him into a parasocial relationship with this strange online figure. however, he was far too anxious to try and form an actual connection with the man or even make himself a prominent figure in his community. he settled for snippets of the riddler from his livestreams and posts, all the while wishing they could meet in person. it’s likely that, subconsciously, reese picked up on similarities between his childhood friend edward and the riddler, though he never was able to make that connection outright until edward was caught and detained and his identity was revealed on the news. as riddler enacted his plan, reese was unable to find it within himself to care that riddler was a murderer; he was in too deep already. he was simply another follower. it’s not as though reese wasn’t inclined to violence himself, anyway.

regarding the batman, reese isn’t very interested in him, and is, in fact, more jealous of him than anything. he wishes that he was doing something that could cause the riddler to be as interested in him as he was in the batman. in fact, reese often fantasized about being the batman himself, simply because he wants to be noticed and loved by the riddler.

during the flooding of gotham, luckily reese’s apartment complex was far enough away from the sea wall to suffer minimal damage. it was, however, at this point that reese began to question his loyalty to the riddler, but by this time it’d already been revealed to him that the riddler was edward nashton. he was able to sympathize with edward and his cause even more due to knowing him personally, and so mentally excused all of his actions. besides, it would be immensely painful for reese to discard his obsession since it was practically the only thing keeping him alive; edward/the riddler was the only thing that mattered anymore.

he begins to daydream about freeing riddler from arkham, but he knows he’s not smart enough to actually achieve such a feat. he hopes edward can free himself, and since edward has always been smarter than him, has hope that he can actually do it. this is where reese is at currently; waiting for edward to escape so he can finally reunite with him after all this time.

i hope you find it interesting anon thank you so much for asking :D

also, this is only one possible backstory for him, i have too many ideas 😭 if you wanna know more you can totally dm me :3 or just send another ask ofc!

[mepposprincess]

Submitting in 15 and 74 for the ask game,, (:

[ @juugahusband ]

YAAAYYY THANK U !

f/os ask game

NUMBER CHOSEN: 15

F/O CHOSEN: Haruto Asuka !

Okay this one doesn't have deep deep lore but my s/i is ya know, director for mankai bc I love when games give me an easy way to insert myself !!

Anyways ! Yeah me and haruto do not get along at first it's a lot of bickering hehe, different companies and all that! However! We have to work together eventually and get closer !!!!! And well. Goes crazy from there

Hehe I call him Haruru and he fucking hates it but it's CUTE idc

Basically, I'm annoying and he deals with me 🤷

NUMBER CHOSEN: 74

F/O CHOSEN: Jason Todd !

So this one is going to be super interesting bc my s/i is actually also an oc! I made Drew before I started making full of s/is, so they were quite literally just ocs but still. Exactly like me LMAO

Buckle up lads there is so much lore here but for times sake I'm gonna be giving a general rundown rather than discussing differing lore depending on which comic run we're talking about.

Drew and Jason are actually childhood friends! .. and also once fought against each other it's fine!

Basically Drew was given up for adoption as a baby due to mysterious powers she seemed to have, and a woman who heard about this took her in and raised her to essentially be a villain.

See Drew is capable of mimicking just about anything as long as she is able to see or hear it. People's voices, movements, actions, even other people's powers though to a much lesser degree. Nothing she replicates there would end up being as strong but it is still possible so long as she sees it happen. So of course being raised in the wrong hands she basically did anything her "mother" desired her to, telling the child that she was in the right and anyone who tried to stop her were villains attempting to break their family apart.

Eventually this all comes to a head, and she's stopped by Bruce and Jason, and Drew realizes what's been going on this whole time they are able to finally break through to her.

She ends up being taken in and raised by Dick's friend El (@eijihino 's oc !!!) and becomes best friends with Jason! She even makes them friendship bracelets that Jason reluctantly wore despite how cutesy it was lol

But uh. Then the bad thing happens and oh. Oh boy. That sure is fucked! And things go wrong. Jason's death fucked up Drew BAD and even though she keeps moving forward, it became incredibly hard for her to.

Then of course there's his eventual comeback, where Drew actually realizes pretty quickly it's him because well. He still has their friendship bracelet, causing ANOTHER breakdown but it's fine it's fine eventually things are mostly okay !

Boy does it still take a few good years after that though for the two to actually end up together they both have a lot of issues to work through, but even before then, their friendship quickly goes back into place once the two actually talk again.

It's also funny because the two enjoy so many antics and banter and they frequently annoy each other in light hearted silly ways. I adore them so much I've had Drew for such a long time and she always will mean the world to me.

And I Adore Jason so so so SOOOOOO much y'all don't even know !!! But yeah uh.. wow this was long.

[eldorr1e]

I just did some searching here in tumblr abt the rise of the brave tangled dragons and I’ve come up with a few headcannons. Also don’t get mad at me if these headcannons aren’t close to cannon at all or don’t fit yours, this is MY headcannons and it’s up to you wether or not you like it. Take it or leave it. Also it’s been awhile since I’ve watched any of these movies so bare with me 😭

If they were in the modern au:

- Jack would be a prankster/trouble kid and always has something up his sleeve

- literally does not take anything seriously

- people are annoyed on how carefree he is

- his behavior makes it look like he actually doesn’t care about anything or anyone

- in truth he actually does but he doesn’t know how to show or expresses his feelings

- is the clown friend.

- has some very complicated feelings abt him not finding who he is and he feels so out of place at school. He’s desperate to know who he is and tries everything he can catch with his hands to see if that thing sparks joy or thrill inside him or not.

- he has tried every single club or extracurricular activities in school, but it seems he can’t find anything he enjoys and he fears that if he doesn’t find one he won’t be able to survive the real world. So he just keeps on trying and experimenting over and over again.

-he has so many hobbies he just doesn’t know what to do with it.

- but he does enjoy skateboarding so that’s that!

- okay I don’t know why but Rapunzel seems like she’d be a manic pixie girl for some reason to me 😭 like cmon bro was locked up her entire childhood and most likely mother gothel allowed her unrestricted access to the internet (probably? I’m not sure, maybe Rapunzel would find a way to use the family computer without her mom noticing 💀)

- she definitely has mode mental scar from the internet don’t even think that’s impossible

- you and I both know the internet… it’s a dangerous place 😁

- trauma from amino. I will not elaborate.

- and she would seem like a weird girl due to her being homeschooled and literally being so out of touch with the world so she wants to live up to every experience possible

- after she found out she was going to a real Highschool she was estactic

- has the touch of the tism (maybe all 4 of them too now that I’m thinking about it)

- I would love to see her in some outdated 2010-2014 outfits and her thinking she’s the most drippiest person on earth lmao

- she is in so many fandoms you have no idea.

- I would love to be friends with her because she’d likely know most of the fandoms I know and would indulge with me with each one 😭 (she’s an og for this✊)

- star butterfly kinnie probably

- okay it’s been awhile since I’ve last watched httyd (seven years *cough*) so my headcannons for hiccup will probably not be as accurate as it seems so don’t throw fire balls at me 😡

- most sane out of the entire three

- literally keeps everyone in line, is the mom too 😭

- responsible teen and is quite mature for his age

- well respected and has a great reputation, but him being friends with the three makes it falter just a little

- his dad owns some company or something and his dad keeps pressuring him to be the greatest yatta yatta yatta which makes him uncomfortable with the amount of expectations and pressure laid upon him on an early age.

- does not want to be apart of it bc he thinks he’ll fuck it up

- loves his friends so much you have no idea

- Merida would be THE sport kid in school don’t even test me

- she absolutely excels in archery and is literally apart of the school’s archery program. She’s very passionate abt it and is the fewest of things that makes her feel alive

- does fencing too but she likes archery more

- her mom doesn’t approve of this at all but her dad is very supportive and just wants her to be happy

- incredibly loud! Has an extremely extroverted personality and is friends with mostly everyone

- her family owns a big business too and she’s the next in line to managing it, except she knew at a young age that she really doesn’t want to do it and wants to be successful at her own thing.

- she’s both scared and angry at her mom for always restricting her with nearly everything and making sure she’s the ‘perfect girl/daughter’, always putting her in etiquette classes and stuff like that

- her mom keeps insisting she’s doing this for her own good and that it will come handy in the future but Merida ain’t having it.

- she’s scared at her mom because one time Merida was practicing archery for a little too long and was late for an important meeting her family was attending to. Her mom was so angry that she burned her archery equipment right infront of Merida which fucked up her brain chemistry 💀

- her mom feels bad but they haven’t really discussed or communicated about this yet, so their both on a tense situation everytime their near each other.

- mommy issues go her

- SHE LISTENS TO MITSKI

- she loves her mom to the bottom of her heart, she really does. And deep down she is aware everything her mom is doing is for her sake and that she should listen to her atleast once. But she has been hurt beyond repair due to their past experiences with her mom and they both don’t seem to know how to fix it.

- therapy is the answer girl 😭

Okay so right now that’s all I can think of at the top of my head. There are probably some more that I left out either on purpose or I just forgot. But holy crap this is the first time I’ve ever made a headcannon list so I’m pretty impressed with myself rn

[lunarstar-fell]

Today I’m really missing my childhood friend. He was quite literally the boy next door and my bedroom window lined up with his across the street. We went inside each other’s houses maybe 20 times total because we spent every single day playing basketball in his driveway (he taught me) until it was too dark to function. He was my first “boyfriend” at 4 years old, when we sat on his front steps and i, having just learned what a boyfriend was said “hey do you wanna be my boyfriend” and he was like “oh sure” and I spent the whole spring break bragging about it (Technically we never officially broke up lmao). we never kissed or even held hands romantically we just spent time together, and when the rest of our friends were around we didn’t really talk. I remember learning about his family, he had a pretty rough home life. His older brother and I hated each other because he and his friends had a crush on my older sister, but we kind of held this respect for each other of being the only people this boy had. His mom and I didn’t get along (I dented her door so it was kinda deserved). I remember one day I was upset so I sat on the curb in front of my house, this was my friend groups signal that you wanted to hang out, and he came up to me and said he had to go to practice tonight but I could come over first thing in the morning and we could spend the day together. So at like 6am I opened my window and called across the street to see if I could come over. And when he let me inside he took me up to his ROOM. This was crazy bc I had never been upstairs before. I remember us just sitting in his bed and playing on his DS. I tried real hard to stay awake but ultimately fell asleep and took a nap. I woke up hours later and he had taken his shirt off (keep in mind there were no intentions here, his house didn’t have AC and it was hot as FUCK up there, but little me was still like omg omg omg). We played games until his brother got home and I had to sneak out the garage door before his mom came in because I wasn’t really allowed to be there. Somehow she found out because he got grounded but he didn’t blame me he just said “you just needed someone to hangout with it’s okay”. We grew apart around the summer I turned 9. He went into middle school and got into some bad situations. When I was 10 my parents decided to move. At this point I didn’t have any friends on our block, I knocked on his door and told him I was leaving and asked to play basketball one last time. We didn’t really know each other anymore so we didn’t talk much, but I think I gave him a hug at the end of the night.

I haven’t seen or spoken to him since then, I’ve heard rumors he ended up in juvie but i honestly don’t know what happened to him. We weren’t close enough for me to go looking for him but we were too close for me to forget. I really hope everything worked out for him.

[cryptidsurveys]

Wednesday, January 29th, 2025.

What’s one of your worst bad habits? People-pleasing and negatively overthinking.

Have you ever gone back to someone who was really bad for you? I wouldn't say they were "bad for me." Even though I don't think we were compatible, my mental health was in a seriously rotten place and any relationship would have been messy and unhealthy was a result.

What written faux pas annoys you the most (maybe an incorrect spelling or forgetting to capitalise certain nouns, for example? I don't think there are any that genuinely annoy me. My dad and I do have inside jokes about certain mix-ups, but it's all in good fun. I wouldn't try to make anyone feel bad about a mistake outside of that context.

What’s the worst effect that social media has had on you? I just feel like social media has been a net negative for me in general, and I wish I could compare my current self against a version who never became so addicted to it.

What colour would you describe yourself as if you had to and why does that colour fit? I don't know about a color, but we've all been assigned animals in cattery and Riley decided I was a possum. She's an otter, Liv is a pigeon or a bearded dragon, Kristen is a meerkat, and River is a red panda. Once Natasha returns from her trip, we need to figure out an animal for her as well. Anyway, it fits because anyone who encounters me would immediately assume I'm a trash goblin full of existential dread.

Who do you miss from your childhood or teen years? Did you just slowly pull apart or did something else happen? I think it's more like a feeling of nostalgia than a real desire to reconnect.

What do you feel people criticise you most for? Do you tend to ignore them, defend yourself or take a different tactic? Lmao, refer to question one. People rarely ever criticize me for anything related to my personality because I'm too good at molding myself into a version they can accept.

Do you have a certain person in mind that if karma was coming for them, they’d not be in a good spot? I'm more of an "actions have consequences" kind of guy. I know that's basically the same concept, but I don't believe in karma as a force that "comes for" people. It's more like if you make enough bad choices, then your life is going to reflect that. And sometimes those bad choices will culminate into a perfect storm.

What similie would you use to describe yourself? I'm not feeling very creative right now.

What’s show that most people you know like do you have no interest in? It's not that I have absolutely zero interest. There are a lot of shows I would probably enjoy if I bothered to check them out. It's just that I never have enough time, motivation, mental space…? Idk. HOWEVER, it's not a show, but Liv and Riley were talking about Lore Olympus yesterday and I was actually interested to the extent that I might just have to give it a shot.

In what way would you say you’re unique and one of a kind? I guess just in a very literal way? Like there's literally no one else exactly like me. I am the only "me" that will ever exist.

Have you ever had a teacher or a professor who really came across that they didn’t like the people he was teaching? The closest would be one of my middle school English teachers.

What toxic behaviour in others have you let slide because you cared for them? Did you eventually come to your senses? Ehhh.

What’s your least favourite month? Is there a particular reason for this? June, July, and August. I'm just not built for summer heat.

Would you say you’re quite capable of asserting yourself? Aww man, do I haaavee tooo???

How did your first serious relationship come to an end? Did you end up staying in contact or seeing them at a later time? I don't even know what to consider as my first serious relationship.

Have you ever got a speeding ticket? No.

What social issue at the moment isn’t receiving enough attention in your own opinion? I can hardly think of a social issue that doesn't receive at least some attention. But attention is vastly different from constructive action or actually solving the problem.

What’s the best piece of advice a grandparent or elder gave you? I don't think I ever received any meaningful advice from my grandparents. I didn't really spend much time around them.

How easily do you get dizzy? I guess fairly easily / often.

When did you last see a phone box? Last spring. I think it was near an Indian restaurant my parents and I wanted to try for lunch, but they ended up being closed. The phone box was no longer operational; some of the windows were broken and the inside was covered in graffiti.

Have you ever been around people intoxicated on drugs? Yeah.

What tasks do you find an absolute bore? Most housecleaning tasks.

What’s your favourite type of coffee? I don't think I have a favorite. I'm really not picky.

Is there one person who has been there for you more than anyone else? My dad.

What’s was the reason you were last sad on a birthday of yours? Probably the usual reasons.

Have you ever drunk texted an ex? Like out of the blue? I don't think so…? However, there was a period in my life during which almost everything was done drunkenly, including communicating with an ex-partner. They were still a big part of my life at that time, though.

What was your favourite childhood game? Some variation of "pretend."

What do people go to you for help with? My dad goes to me for help with reaching items in the back of the refrigerator because he can't bend down as well as he used to.

What movie have you been meaning to watch but you’ve just not got around to it yet? There isn't one.

[call-sign-shark]

Sorry for the delay babe, I finally had the time to read this second part and I am yelling at my screen because it was a fucking masterpiece. Your new series got me hooked so fast that I was frustrated for days because I couldn't read this second part. Also sorry if my comment doesn't make any sense but, Brummie, there are so many events to cover here.

First thing first... I SWEAR TO GOD IM GOING TO KIDNAP ARTHUR AND TIE HIM TO MY BED BECAUSE HE IS LITERALLY SO PERFECT AND CUTE. I just love his friendship with Y/N, this is so sweet I can't - The way he gently bothers her like an older brother figure but also tries to wake her up from the helpless love she still has for Tommy. I think the part that got me swooning was this one: "You and everyone else in the betting office were convinced he had made it his life mission to get at least one smile or laugh from you a day, even if it meant ridiculing himself at your expense." Not only it is in character for Arthur considering Y/N is his childhood friend, but this is particularly sweet. Arthur is a loving character despite the horrors, and I feel like he's truly Y/N's biggest support in this chaotic situation. Also the "Yes Sergeant Major" put a smile on my face 'cause I could hear him through your voice.

Arghhh I just want to smack Tommy so bad. I mean, I get it: he's been disappointed and broken by her refusal -- which is a wonderful idea for the plot of your story Brummie. How can you be so talented and creative ??--. It is also true that he must have felt rejected but it is no reason to hold a grudge for SO LONG? Moreover, the way he doesn't even greet her and just slaps a pile of work on her desk is just mean. Arthur's right, she needs to kick him in the balls. Yet... It's understandable why she doesn't do it. I mean, she must feel incredibly guilty. Maybe she even thinks she deserves this treatment after breaking his heart? Nevertheless, it remains incredibly painful for her especially since she's still trying to "seduce" him in a way.

"You're your own worse enemy" = GO GO POLLY GO TELL HIM!! Gosh this woman spits facts.

Alright now about the birthday party at the Garrison... It's fun to see Tommy being cold and despicable but still looking to attract Y/N's attention. What a clever way to show that he is definitely still feeling something for his ex-lover! Tommy apart, Arthur's boring speech is a good comic relief. Poor kitten, he's just doing his best lmao! But before we dig into the topic I just have to be a fangirl one last time and say that this part "Arthur caught your line of sight sending you a wink and a smile" .... I cant. I'm sorry Brummie I can't. He's just too cute. Fortunately enough, you counterbalance the cuteness with Tommy's coldness and dickery. Usually, I am not a Grace hater you know? Quite the contrary, I enjoyed her character and thought she was the best match for Tommy. Yet, the way you portrayed her made me want to slap her face. The way she tries to taunt Y/N and talks about the pocket watch is awful. I mean this quote "I'll get rid of it, it's not like it's worth anything" SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH??? I feel so bad for Y/N, especially since Tommy did put the new pocket watch and dismissed Y/N's feelings. Come on, I think I'm going to grab Grace and beat the fuck out of Tommy with her.

Once again, the real hero and sweetheart of the whole story is my baby husband Arthur 🥹The way he runs after our favorite little narrator and reassures her is indescribably soft. He might be rough and rude, but he does know what heartbreaks feel like -- he's also not stupid and sees that Tommy still loves her. I swear when he hugged her I sighed with relief because she really needed that. Moreover, he really nailed the whole scene by insulting Tommy and refusing to give him back his pocket watch. That's what I call the best big brother ever! " You're breaking her heart you stubborn prick" This was epic.

"She broke my heart first" TOMMY YOU IDIOT. He's more childish than a three-year-old!!! Don't you want to use your brain and understand that she didn't want to be your wife for five days and then become a young widow?? Ughh. Imma just --

The ending was spectacular: whether it is the escalation with Kimber's men or the fact that despite all these years she is still Tommy's girl was a powerful way to end this chapter. Brummie, this is once again one of my fav ongoing series and I already can't wait for part 3. Thank you for writing my Arthur so well and giving him a little bit of spotlight, he's truly a well-deserved moral support for readers. In the meantime, I am (not so) patiently waiting for the next update teehee. 🖤

PREVIOUS PART

Hopelessly Devoted (PART TWO)

Summary: After spending the whole night finishing the documents Tommy had asked for, you woke up confronted by his cold demeanour once against. Your heart only breaking further when you had to sit through his birthday celebration at the Garrison opposite the new barmaid he was now seeing. If that wasn't enough you watched on as the one thing you never thought would get replaced did, when Tommy was given a birthday gift in a small box.

Warnings: Language, angst, fluff, mutual pining

"Wakey wakey, rise and shine" Arthur said as he stood in front of your desk with a huge grin on his face. " You're a bloody snorer" he chuckled as he dropped the accounts book that was sitting amongst the various documents on your desk right next to your head in attempts to wake you again.

" Fuck sake" you mumbled, your whole body jolting at the loud noise as you reached your hand out pushing the book away from you. " I don't snore" you said with a grunt as you slowly lifted your head from the papers beneath you, one of them awkwardly stuck to the side of your cheek which Arthur took no time in ripping from your face, leaving you with a lingering sting. With a cheeky smirk playing on the corner of his lips he looked back at you and the glare you was sending his way, knowing how much you desperately wanted to return the favor, but thankful that you hadn't enough energy to do so in your sleep deprived state.

" Late night?" he asked picking up your half empty glass of whisky, swirling it around before downing the rest. " Brrr fuck! That'll put hair on your balls" he said grimacing at the sharpness from the bitter liquor. "Not that you would know, since you know, you don't have..."

" Ok Arthur shut up, I get it " you interrupted as you rubbed the side of your neck feeling the soreness of the uncomfortable position you had slept in all night start to set in.

" You gonna tell me what you were doing here all night then?" he asked as he perched himself on the edge of your desk looking to you then back to all the workers now making their way through the betting shop.

" Tommy wanted me to finish these" you said as you collected the documents in front of you, your eyes quickly darting to his face knowing what his reaction would be. " Deadlines today Arthur..." you said as he slowly nodded his head, rubbing the side of his nose with his thumb. " He asked me because I'm the only one that will finish it on time" you added trying to convince him and yourself you hadn't become a complete push over. " Please, just don't. Don't say it" you said before he had a chance to reply, turning your head away as you tried to fight back the tears now welling in your eyes, knowing full well how pathetic you had become in your desperate attempts to please his brother.

" Come on love" Arthur said as he placed his hand firmly on your shoulder trying to comfort you in his own way. "Where's that girl I used to know ay? She would've kicked him in the balls already, or at least told him to fuck off if he asked her to stay an extra five minutes let alone a whole night" he chuckled trying to make you laugh as a small smile broke free from your lips.

" There you go" he said giving your shoulder a small squeeze as Tommy walked in, quickly turning the mood sour again. Bringing your head down in embarrassment at your show of emotions you frantically brushed away your tears, hiding yourself from his piercing glare.

" Those papers done?" Tommy said walking through the betting shop as Polly followed behind. No greeting, no smile, cold as ever. This was the Tommy you had now become accustomed to since his return from France, since your break up.

" Hello would be nice " Arthur replied for you. " You know, good morning, how are you? Oh I'm fine Tommy, bloody fantastic!" Arthur said as he stood up gesturing with his hands whilst his brother ignored his theatrics.

" Have them on my desk in ten minutes" Tommy replied slamming his office door, pulling the blind down.

" Birthday boys in a mood" Arthur said turning back to you as you sent him a small nod, the smile he had managed to coax from you having left the moment Tommy walked through the door. " Coming for a drink tonight?" Arthur asked as he walked back in front of your desk, forgetting or purposely leaving out the fact those drinks would be for Tommy's birthday. " Me and you Y/N we'll have a little dance, that'll cheer you up" he said mimicking a waltz all by himself as Polly turned around from the pot of boiling water she was pouring, her eyes widening in horror at Arthur's dangerously swaying hips.

" Jesus Christ, you're putting me of my tea" she chuckled as she walked over with a cup for you. "You'll end up in hospital dancing with him, he's all legs and arms " Polly said as Arthur stopped to look at the blank expression on your face, unresponsive to any attempts he desperately made to get you to laugh.

" Would you lot stop fucking around and get to work!" Tommy yelled from his office as he slammed his newspaper on the desk in front of him.

" Bloody party pooper, ay Y/N? " Arthur laughed trying to cheer you up once more as a smile finally reappeared on your lips lighting his eyes up in accomplishment. You could always count on Arthur to try and cheer you up. You and everyone else in the betting office were convinced he had made it his life mission to get at least one smile or laugh from you a day, even if it meant ridiculing himself at your expense. " Yes Sergeant Major" Arthur saluted as he opened Tommy's office door, the huff of a response from his brother loud enough to remind everyone just how much of a mood he was in or more specifically, the year long mood he had been in with you.

Sitting in front of your desk you collected all the papers in your hand placing them neatly together in a file, nervously biting your bottom lip as you glanced up to Tommy's door. Quickly looking around the room you turned away from everyone as you pulled out a small mirror and lipstick from within your handbag. Dabbing a small amount onto your fingers you brushed the cherry red gloss onto your lips, rubbing the rest into your cheeks to give your self a rosy glow. God you was pathetic you thought to yourself as you closed your compact mirror, the loud snap of it shutting inadvertently snapping you out of your pitiful attempts to look nice for him. But yet you continued in your endeavour to make yourself look more presentable as you pushed your fingers through your hair, taming your rebellious locks into something more orderly than the birds nest currently framing your face. Placing the folder under you arm you stood up heading for his office, head held high, summoning as much confidence as you could.

" I know you're up to something Thomas. Billy Kimber..." Polly was saying when you opened the door and she and Tommy turned to look at you.

" Sorry, I know you wanted these since the deadlines today" you said as you looked down at the documents in your hand stood between the door frame.

" Twenty minutes " Tommy replied taking out his watch as your shoulders dropped, his cold manner never ceasing to crush the small amounts of courage you could muster up nowadays. Rolling her eyes Polly walked over to you, pulling you in as she shut the door.

" Come on love, come in" she said with a smile as she took the file from you looking through it briefly when her eyes snapped up to Tommy. Clearing his throat Tommy fidgeted in his chair his eyes darting to his Aunt then back to the cigarette between his fingers.

" Pass me the diary Y/N" Tommy said shifting away from the formidable stare his Aunt was sending him. Was he seconds away from feeling the back of her hand like he did on a daily occurrence when he was a child? He thought to himself as her eyes pierced into him. Nodding you walked over to the shelves behind him as the fabric of your dress brushed against his leg, your perfume filled with notes of vanilla and jasmine quickly engulfing his senses, transporting him back to happier times. Leaning over you placed the large book in front of him as your hair slowly cascaded down to his face, swaying gently across his cheek, sending a shiver of goosebumps throughout his body. A sudden surge of emotions rushed towards him, catching him off guard as he briefly lost himself in the memories your presence conjured up.

" You can go" he said coldly, recomposing himself as he stubbed his cigarette out into the ash tray on his desk, his whole body stiffening at the intrusion of misplaced hurt now quickly filling his chest.

Turning around you walked to the door stopping momentarily as Polly curiously raised her brow, watching you as if she was anticipating a response. But no response came. Arthur was right, where was the girl you once was? That girl would have launched something at him, that or given him a kick in the balls. Instead you quietly closed the door behind you as you walked to your desk, deflated by his constant hostility towards you.

" You little shit!" Polly said throwing the documents she had been clutching tightly in her hand at Tommy the moment you shut the door. " These don't need filling out for another week. You had her stay all night!" she said placing both her hands on the table looming over her nephew" You can add scorned to your new founded personality Tommy" she hissed as she shook her head at him. "Not only do you remind her everyday of how wronged you feel, you won't let her move on. Keeping her here all hours, making her come in on the weekends, stopping all attempts of her ever being able to move on. You were so young, all you had to do was wait. But no, your stubbornness prevented that. And she waited for you Tommy oh did she wait, feeling guilty everyday for being mature on the matter, guilt forced upon her by you" she finished catching her breath, fed up with the way he had been acting. Standing up Tommy walked over to the window lighting a cigarette as he cleared his throat, the scolding he had just got from his Aunt unexpectedly unnerving him.

" You can go too" Tommy said dismissively as he looked out the window watching the busy streets below him while rubbing his brow with his thumb, feeling just as deflated as you.

" You're your own worse enemy" she said as she turned to face the door. "Oh and Tommy" she added as she looked over her shoulder at him. "That new barmaid you're seeing, I wouldn't count on her to piss on me if I was on fire" she said folding her arms as she left the office, leaving Tommy to wallow in his own self-pity.

Kicking the chair In front of him Tommy leaned back against the wall turning his head to look at you sitting at the desk just outside his office. Ten years ago today, did you think he'd forget. The promises he made the hopes and dreams you shared for the future. Polly's words had unsettled him, not because she was forcing him to remember but because it made him face the uncomfortable truth of how unfair he had been with you. You were too young, it was bad timing. That's what everyone said when Tommy asked you to marry him five days before leaving for France, a proposal you was sure he made on a complete whim. He had brought the ring, asked the priest, fuck he had even managed to scramble enough money together for a new suit. But you said no. Not because you didn't want to or because you didn't love him, but because his timing was bloody awful. He was days away from leaving to fight in a war that was claiming young men's lives every minute of every hour. Sure it was romantic, young couples were doing the very same thing up and down the country. But you wanted to wait, wanted to celebrate his return with something everyone could look forward to, something to hold onto as the lonely nights without him passed by. The last thing you wanted was to be left a newlywed and a widow, your nuptials stained by the possible outcome of him never returning. But Tommy being the stubborn man he was wouldn't accept your reasoning. He had quickly convinced himself you had been influenced by your family, by your friends, heck the whole of Small Heath for all he knew when you made him wait for your answer until the next day, popping the happy bubble you had both been living in for the past five years. Darting his eyes away from you Tommy clenched his jaw, leaning forward to grab his coat and diary on his desk as he stormed out his office. His bitterness was justified, you didn't love him the way he loved you, he was sure of it.

Five minutes until the end of the day and all you wanted to do was go home and sleep but being the good ol' sport you was you had agreed to go for drinks to celebrate Tommy's birthday.

As you all made your way to the door, Polly stood beside you casually speaking about her plans for the weekend you turned your head to the side to see Tommy stood right behind you, so close you could feel the heat of his breath on the back of your neck. Was this a new way he had chosen to make you feel uncomfortable? If it was it was certainly working you thought as you impatiently waited to leave. God what was taking John so long to open the door?

"It's bloody stuck again. It's this fucking weather it's freezing up the handle" John said as he rattled the doorknob trying to loosen it.

" Come on John give it a good push or are your hands too dainty?" Arthur shouted stood right behind Polly as she grimaced at his bellowing voice. A small traffic jam of people started to accumulate as everyone waited for John to get the door open, your bodies getting pushed closer together. With Tommy's firm statue now firmly pushed up against your back his eyes wandered down to your reddened cheeks, flushed from the contact of feeling him so close to you again. For just as much as your heart was rapidly beating so was Tommy's, the warmth of your body comforting in the only way that could.

" Bloody hell Curly" Uncle Charlie shouted as he stumbled into everyone pushing you all forward once more. Falling into you, Tommy quickly grabbed hold of your waist stopping you from stumbling over. His touch now so unfamiliar, your eyes darted down to his hand still resting on your hip as you watched his thumb instinctively brush over the curve of your body like he had done hundreds of times before. Suddenly realising, Tommy quickly moved his hand away as he cleared his throat.

" You was gonna fall" he said as you turned your head to the side in response to his sharp movements.

" Don't worry Tommy I wouldn't dare to think otherwise. We're done" you said surprised at how confidently the words had left your lips. Although not being completely honest with yourself, you had begun to realise you needed to stop, stop your constant lamenting over the past, stop your persistence in holding onto the faintest of hopes. Looking straight ahead you pushed your shoulder back, in turn pushing his body away from yours as you crossed your arms. You was getting tired of his shit. The remarks, the looks, his constant mood swings, enough was enough. Scoffing Tommy stepped back, giving you the space you clearly wanted as a small wave of self-doubt crept up on him in response. Had you moved on, met someone knew? Or had he taken things too far thinking you'd always be there waiting for him? The thought of either being true made him feel uncomfortably sick.

Now sat in the Garrison snug surrounded by Tommy's family and friends you looked up to see him sat directly in front of you, his arm draped over the back of the chair next to him, a scowl spread across his face. Trying to focus your attention elsewhere you ignored the constant glares he was sending your way, the words you had left him with clearly bothering his thoughts. He was getting impatient he wanted you to give him attention, wanted you to look his way. But every remark he made you would dismiss, unapologetically enjoying the growing confidence in you as you started playing the push and pull he had playing with you for the past year. That was until Grace walked in and sat next to him, snuggling into his side as Tommy fidgeted in his seat removing his arm from behind the chair as his whole body stiffened and he sat up straight. Feeling a sudden wave of nerves wash over you at the sight of them together your eyes quickly darted around the room when Arthur caught your line of sight sending you a wink and a smile, the self-doubt that was bubbling in your stomach quickly simmering down at the sight of his reassurance.

" Right a toast!" John said standing up as Arthur jumped up pushing him down by the shoulder.

" I'm the oldest, I do the toasting" he said lifting his glass as a sense of superiority rose within him. He may not be the boss but he was still the big brother and there were some things only big brothers did.

" Yeh whatever, just don't ramble on" John said as he rolled his eyes taking a sip of whisky.

" This time ten years ago on the eve of Tom's birthday..."

" Jesus Christ..." Polly mumbled under her breath as Arthur started his speech.

" I had just scored the biggest loot of of my life and Tommy the biggest win of his. A night never to be forgotten. To whisky, sprouts and cramped storage rooms. Happy Birthday baby brother!" Arthur finished downing his drink them slamming it on the table as everyone looked at eachother mumbling happy birthdays whilst they raised their glasses in complete confusion at the meaning behind Arthur's toast. Looking up through hooded eyes Tommy caught your eye as you both sent eachother smile, the memories of that night flooding back to you both. Watching the moment between you Grace gripped harder onto Tommy's arm, uncomfortable with the way he was looking at you, the way she often caught him looking at you.

" What in the bloody hell was that toast?" John said as he looked up to Arthur, his whole face scrunched up, completely bewildered by his older brothers speech.

"Those that needed to hear it, heard it" Arthur said trying to sound poetic.

" Sit down Arthur" Polly said shaking her head as she poured herself a third glass of whisky.

" Anyway..." Grace said raising her brow turning to Tommy as she pulled out a small box from her bag. " Happy Birthday" she said kissing his cheek as she handed the gift to him. Putting his drink down Tommy cleared his throat as he sent her a faint smile, opening the present she had offered him. Looking down into the box Tommy's eyes quickly darted up to your face as he pinched his bottom lip. Furrowing your brow at his sudden change in expression, you quickly understood as to why he reacted the way he did when he pulled out a brand-new gold pocket watch from within the small box.

" Tom's already got a pocket watch, he's had it for ten years" Uncle Charlie was the first to say as he leant against the wall whilst the rest of the room suddenly went quiet.

" Exactly, ten years. I got him a new one, a nicer one" Grace said as you felt your heart suddenly drop into your stomach. " You not going to put it on?" She asked turning to Tommy as he nodded reaching into his waistcoat unclasping the watch you had scrimped and saved for a decade ago. Brushing his thumb over the front of it, you and everyone else watched as Tommy placed it on the table, glancing up to you and the tears now welling in your eyes.

" Thanks love" Tommy said attaching his new watch to the chain on his waistcoat, giving her a small peck to the lips as she smiled into the kiss.

" What are you doing?" She said as she watched Tommy turn the dials on his new watch back an extra five minutes, a habit ten years in the making first started by you. " It's five minutes too late" she laughed as she took it from him turning it to the correct time as Polly rested her hand on your thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze in reassurance as everyone else's eyes looked back at you knowingly. Picking up his old pocket watch Tommy was about to put it in his suit pocket when Grace quickly took it from him.

" I'll get rid of it, it's not like it's worth anything" she said whilst Tommy brushed his hand down his mouth as a heavy expression washed over his face. For ten years he had carried that watch against his body, ten years he had carried what felt like a piece of you with him. Its sentimental value was unmatched and Tommy did not want to be parted from it.

" I'll melt it down get some money from it" Arthur said reaching over the table grabbing it from her.

" You won't get much" she laughed as she looked around the room at everyone and the unamused expressions on their face, making it clear they did not share the same opinion. " It's scrap metal" she said as she shrugged her shoulders sipping on her whisky. Turning to Polly a tear fell down your cheek as you quickly collected you coat and bag into your lap.

" I need to leave" you said quietly as she nodded her head sympathetically, pressing a kiss to your cheek. Standing up you pulled your chair back when Tommy abruptly stood up at the same time taking everyone by surprise. Your eyes now locked onto eachother you momentarily stared at one another whilst he also watched the cascade of tears fall down your cheeks.

" You bastard" you mouthed as Tommy swallowed harshly watching you now storm out the room.

" Y/N wait up love, I'll walk you home" Arthur said climbing over the table not bothering to walk past everyone as glasses and bottles scattered all over the room. " Oops, sorry Grace" Arthur sniggered, clumsily treading on the end of her shoe as she yelped in pain.

" Arthur..." Tommy said as he watched his brother walk out the snug putting his old pocket watch in his coat, feeling like a part of his already broken heart had left.

" Y/N!" Arthur said running up to you. " Bloody hell when did you get so fast?" he joked as he spun you around.

" I can't... I can't do this any more" you said sobbing as you fell into his chest holding on tightly to the front of his coat as he wrapped his arms around you.

" Go on love let it out, have a good cry" he said sighing as he looked back to the Garrison. "You know it's my brotherly duty to give him a good punch in the balls now and then, he's long due one" he informed you as a small laugh escaped your sobbing cries.

" When you do, make sure you don't hold back" you said pulling away as he held onto your shoulders.

" You look like a snotty kid again" be said handing you a rag from his pocket which you furrowed your brow at.

" God knows where that's been" you sniffed throwing it on the ground beside you.

" Charming " he laughed as he pulled out Tommy's pocket watch. "Ere, this belongs to you" he said as he placed it in your hand.

" Melt it down Arthur, he doesn't want it. He has something new and shiny" you said bitterly, no longer reffering to watch but rather the barmaid constantly clinging onto him.

" Nah, don't believe it. He'll want it back, all of it." he said closing your fingers around it as you looked over his shoulder to see Tommy standing outside the Garrison watching you.

" Bye Arthur" you said as he turned to see his brother looking at you both, exhaling a cloud of smoke out into the bitter January air " Go, he's your brother, it's his birthday go celebrate with him" you said as you gave him a hug before you turned and headed for home.

"My watch?" Tommy asked as Arthur approached him, stopping to face his younger brother in the door way.

" You're breaking her heart you stubborn prick" Arthur said as he pushed past him ignoring his question as Tommy squinted into the distance, a frustrated sigh leaving his lips as he watched you turn the corner.

" She broke my heart first" Tommy muttered quietly under his breath as he threw his cigarette into the dirt heading back into the warmth of the Garrison.

Turning the corner onto the back alley of your bedsit you headed for home wiping your tears with the sleeve of your coat when you looked up to see two men blocking your way.

" Alright sweetheart?" One of them said as he turned to face you opening his coat to show you the gun he had sitting in his holster.

" I don't want any trouble let me pass" you said trying to move around him when he grabbed you, slamming you up against the brick wall.

" Tommy's girl right? He said, now holding tightly onto your arm as he looked to his friend for confirmation.

" No you've got the wrong girl" you said looking between them, shuffling in place as you tried to loosen yourself out of his grip.

" No, it's you alright. Said he had a girl waiting for him back in this shit hole of a town and that the barmaids Kimber's for the taking when he asked if he could dance with her at the races. Good thing he didn't bring you, 'cause I reckon Kimber would have rather had a dance with you instead" he said as he glared down at your body, brushing his tongue across his bottom lip. " Y/N right? Tommy's childhood sweetheart. No point in denying it love, everyone as far Kings Norton to Old Oscott have told us so" he said as you furrowed your brow in confusion. You hadn't been Tommy's girl since the war.

" I'm not his girl" you said stomping on his foot as you pushed past him.

" Jesus fucking christ! She's broken my toe, she bloody broke my toe! " he said as stumbled back onto the ground.

" It's definitely you, feisty little thing aren't you?" the other man said as he approached you leaving his friend to attend to himself. " We've heard whispers your boyfriend might be up to something. Tell him we're keeping our eye on him and if he doesn't play by the rules the boss will put a bullet through his head, but not before your gypsy lover watches you do the rounds with every single one of Kimber's men" he said as he opened his pocket knife in one swift movement, pointing it inches away from your throat. "Understood?" he said as you slowly nodded your head your eyes focused down at the blade now pressing against your skin and the burn of it slowly cutting into your flesh.

"Good" he said putting his knife back into his pocket as he turned to his friend leaning against the wall opposite you.

"She broke my fucking toe I'm sure of it"

" Would you quit your whining" his friend answered as he put his arm around his shoulder and they both turned the corner back onto the main street.

Leaning up against the cold brick wall you opened your coat as your chest heaved up and down your whole body trembling in fear. Turning your head you saw Isaiah one of Tommy's men at the end of the alley way watching you, his brow scrunched up in confusion at seeing Kimber's men leaving the same area where you was currently standing. Tipping the end of his cap to you, he glanced back at you a second time as he scratched the back of his head quickly walking off in the direction of the Garrison. Pulling your coat back around your body you stumbled along the cobbled path, your hand out against the brick wall beside you, keeping you up from your legs buckling beneath you as fear and adrenaline continued to course through your body. Fumbling in your bag you pulled out your keys as you watched your desperate attempts to open your front door, your shaking hands preventing you from even holding the key straight. Giving up you slid down the door collapsing onto the floor as a stream of tears fell down your cheeks, your mind replaying what had just happened. You knew of Tommy's dealing with Kimber, dealings you oversaw when Tommy got his own betting licence. That was supposed to be the end of it, but after what just happened you quickly realised Tommy had another plan, one that was not only putting his own life in danger again but yours too. Is that why he mentioned you to Kimber's men, not wanting to get his new fling in harm's way, his bitterness and hate towards you so strong he diverted their attention to you, diverted everyone's attention to you? Y/N Y/L/N Tommy Shelby's childhood sweetheart. Apparently he had the whole of Birmingham still thinking it, now a pawn in his never ending game for more power, more success. As you battled with all the questions running through your head you ended up at the same conclusion that not only did Tommy hate you he had let harm to come to you by putting you in the firing lane. Or had he? It had been a year since the command went out on the streets of Birmingham an order intended for your own protection decided long before any dealings with Kimber, a command that clearly hadn't gone unforgotten. You was not to be bothered not to be approached. No one was to lay a hand on you by order of the Peaky Blinders by order of Thomas Shelby, because you was still his girl, always.

(Part Three coming soon!)

Tag list: @cosniffee @jonsncws @powellssaturn @jessimay89 @bruher @riseandreigns4u @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @chimchimjiminie16 @gaslysainz @calicoootalks (unable to tag) @weaponizedvirtue @vlryexsworld (unable to tag) @shittyprofilebutfuckit @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @peakyswritings

[itsjaywalkers]

hello laurie!! <3 insane commute nonnie here (again) omg i read oby yesterday omw to class (ended up staying at my friend's again bc his roommate was still out. sadly he's back) and i should not have done that bc OMG?? BABE I WAS LITERALLY THINKING ABT THEM THE WHOLE TIME UT GOT SO BAD I SAW MY PROFESSOR (he doesn't even look like james. he's just fit in a 'Hear me out guys...' way)N BLUSHED I WAS ACTUALLY GIGGLING AT RANDOM TIMES THINKING ABT THEM also like. sirius n regulus in this😭😭 regulus cursing sirius out for being a good brother is so real to me as someone with 12 year older brother bc he spent my entire childhood terrorizing me n now he's the sweetest person Ever. not even in an evil way he's just genuinely nice to me so if i ever complain abt him everyone goes ??? YOUR brother??? its so annoying (i love him). just reg veing grumpy<3 he's my fav little purse man and ok oh god never thought i'd say this. i have NEVER gotten the whole daddy thing but now im just🧍‍♂️bc i need to call james potter daddy while he fucks me what who said that also like. extreme apologies for how extremely inappropriate this might've gotten i was up all night studying for a quiz we have today (cannot catch a break w these ppl istg) n i swear my brain refuses to function and i have no idea!!! (please pray for me) also i hope you're doing great<3 sadly i do know work and adult things but im glad to know that nothing bad's going on!! you deserve the best<33 also i Absolutely get being funnier in your mother tongue sometimes i have these sudden thoughts n they're soo funny but i have to translate them which is like. okay but the vibes change istg!! i usually end texting my siblings abt it bc someone deserves to know how absolutely funny i am!! (all i do is make dad jokes) and (im actually so sorry bc ik you prob dont mind the book-long asks but its still!! so embarrassing!! like girl why are you yapping sm!!) i haven't read the 2nd part yet (i read the first part n just stared ahead blankly for like an hour after i read the 1st part. it did things to me) but im gonna read it after my quiz as a little treat<3 thank you for writing them sm!!!<3

HI BABE <333 sorry it took me so long to get back to u, life has been soooo hectic istg

AND OMG IM STILL SO SHY ABOUT U READING OBY but i'm so glad u enjoyed it and that it had the desired effect, it's definitely not the type of story u should read in class or just like . in front of ppl . i don't blame u for getting all flustered around ur professor even if he doesn't look anything like james. it's just the vibe yk??? you're literally so real for that

sirius and reg in oby are !! so important to me !! i feel like they have the best relationship in all of my fics, bc they're on good terms on nothing happens too but they argue . a lot . and they're gonna have some issues down the line. and they're also very close in the boxer au but there's still gonna be a lot of angst regarding their relationship. in oby, tho, they're just brothers <3 they love each other so much <3 and i'm so glad i'm portraying their dynamic accurately bc a lot of their convos are based on stuff me and my sisters have talked/fought about lmao

LISTENNNN I ALSO WASN'T INTO THE WHOLE DADDY THING like i didn't mind it and i read it occassionally but i didn't seek it out. but now that i'm actively writing it . well . i guess i kinda get the appeal (girl who doesn't even have a daddy kink) SO I GET U I REALLY DO

u don't have to apologiseeee i'm always happy to open horny hours especially if it's for james potter <3 and also i know it's been a few days but i hope the quiz went well and that u never do that again bc u need to rest!! i mean it!!

i'm doing quite well actually!! work's been a nightmare but apart from that i'm great!! i recently moved into a new flat with two friends and the place is soooo nice i'm in love with it i can't believe it's ours <333 AND SAMEEEE i always complain about it to my sisters or my spanish friends bc it annoys me to no end like . i'm literally soooo funny and it pains me that you'll never realise bc it's only when i speak in my first language ugh

I REALLY DON'T MIND THEM BABE IN FACT I LOVE THEM NEVER STOP and don't apologise again i'll kick ur ass!!! and god you're so very sweet to me, i hope u enjoyed/enjoy it and i'm sending u the biggest hug + forehead kissie in the world MWAH <3