Tumgik
#it probably stabbed someone
alexreadssomeshit · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
A frog to keep you safe on your journey!!
Me - *gently hands you the frog* keep froggo safe. And you keep safe. *Dramatic gasp* I think it likes you ❤️
2 notes · View notes
sunderwight · 1 month
Text
Thinking about a crack SV AU where Shen Yuan transmigrates into a horse.
Luckily he is not a normal horse, no! He is a spiritual stallion, a character that was mainly a joke about the novel's genre in PIDW, originally bred on Cang Qiong's beast tamer peak but not actually encountered until Luo Binghe's "raze cultivation society to the ground" phase. At which point there was a subplot about him finding the stallion and letting it loose to run free, as like, an allegorical reference. Occasionally Binghe would find other horses across the years that were obviously descended from that one, as more jokes, until Airplane forgot about the reference and never brought it up again.
Shen Yuan, of course, was always Big Mad that Binghe never got to actually ride this super magical mystical horse, and never got the horsegirl arc he deserved! Where is the man's companion animal? How can someone with nine billion wives and even more nameless underlings be fated for a life of perpetual loneliness??
Naturally, the first thing Shen Yuan does upon figuring out that he's this magic horse is break out of the beast peak and make for Qing Jing. He's not necessarily planning to go bond with the protagonist or anything, but he's not particularly keen to live out his fate as some feral horse that fucks other horses either, and he's extremely valuable so it's unlikely anyone will kill him even if they catch him again. So, might as well take the opportunity to clap eyes on his favorite character before he's doomed to a life of eating hay and whatever, right?
Horse SY manages to arrive on Qing Jing Peak right before the start of the skinner mission, though, just as Ming Fan is telling Luo Binghe that there aren't enough horses. Ning Yingying points out SY and is all oh look, one of the stable hands must have realized the error and brought another, and everyone else is kind of like "uh that is... not a normal horse...?" but then Shen Qingqiu gets impatient and snaps at them to get a move on, and fear of their mercurial shizun overrides everything else to the point where Binghe just clambers desperately onto this mystical saddle-free horse.
Airplane borrowed kelpies for his demon beasts at some point and they are pretty common, so it occurs to Luo Binghe only after he's climbed onto the strange and definitely not normal Horse SY that he might be on the verge of getting carried off and drowned. But SY just kind of rolls with it, and falls into line with the other horses.
Hey, it's an excuse to leave the sect! And practice doing horse stuff! And also, he's not going to buck Luo Binghe off of his back!
Of course as it happens, the specific kind of magical horse that Shen Yuan is comes with a specially bred-for trait where they only bond to one rider. They're usually bred for like, kings and emperors and other highly important figures as status symbols, like magical companion animals but ones with perfectly mundane utilities. He's also got Shadowfax-like stamina and speed, meaning that Airplane can treat this kind of horse as interchangeable with a motorbike, and of course the capacity to cultivate. Which means that when the party finally arrives at their destination, everyone suddenly realizes that Luo Binghe has unwittingly bonded with a horse that's worth a fortune and won't ever let anyone else ride it now.
Shen Qingqiu flips his shit, Shen Yuan bites Shen Qingqiu, Luo Binghe hyperventilates, Ning Yingying gets kidnapped, and the situation basically resolves with Shen Yuan kicking the shit out of the skinner demon in defense of his new BFF the baby protagonist.
Well if he's going to end up letting anyone ride him for the rest of his life, Luo Binghe would be his first choice.
Anyway they get back and Shen Qingqiu is still spitting mad and offers Luo Binghe's head on a platter to the lord of the beast peak, but Beast Peak's people are actually kind of pleased. Like sure it's a little inconvenient, because Luo Binghe is a Qing Jing disciple and not one of theirs, but they were honestly beginning to worry that this stallion wouldn't bond with anyone! It's really hard to manage them when they don't! And SY in particular comes from a long and illustrious lineage that has nearly died out a few times, so they were never planning to sell him off even for a high price anyway. With a rider chosen, the odds of them getting him to cooperate for breeding purposes are a lot higher, plus it will be much easier to take care of him now! Though they will be taking Shen Qingqiu up on his offer of Luo Binghe's time, since "punishment" for this transgression will involve splitting his time between the peaks in order to help take care of SY (all the beast peak disciples are super relieved, apparently before Shen Yuan transmigrated, the horsey original goods was extremely prone to biting and kicking...)
Shen Qingqiu basically tells Luo Binghe not to bother coming back, which fills Binghe with despair, but he gets over it eventually. The beast peak is nice! They give him a cultivation manual as well, in order to help him understand what they do, and it seems that Binghe can understand it a lot better than his QJP one. The peak lord gives him permission to use the dorms as well, since there will probably be times when he has to stay overnight, and no one says much about it when Binghe basically moves in full time. On the books he's still a Qing Jing disciple, but functionally he's a transfer student now. He even sits in on classes and lectures, and a lot of the peak are just under the impression that he was transferred over to their peak in full.
Shen Yuan considers this a big improvement, and expects Luo Binghe to enjoy running around with all the pretty girls on the peak. But Binghe mostly seems to spend his time with him, in fact, asking questions upon questions not only about Shen Yuan's breed, but about his specific background and lineage. The beast peak is overall pretty nice, although sadly it's not full of cool monsters and companion animals as Shen Yuan would have hoped. Mostly the peak specializes in the cultivation world's equivalent of livestock and work animals, training beasts like spirit eagles and horses like himself, and raising animals prized for their meat, organs, bones, or other parts for medicinal, alchemical, or culinary ingredients, or sometimes components for weapons or other spiritual tools. They work the most closely with Qian Cao, Wan Jian, and An Ding.
Being a horse is honestly kind of boring for Shen Yuan, although running is fun, and he at least gets plenty of time to work on his cultivation.
By the time Sha Hualing's invasion happens, he's gotten pretty comfortable in his new state of affairs. Binghe has even figured out that he likes being read to, and has started reading aloud to him from various texts in the evenings! So far no good novels, or even bad trashy novels, but it's better than nothing!
Binghe also takes him for a lot of rides around the peaks (not Qing Jing) which is how they end up caught on Qiong Ding when the rainbow bridge goes down. When Shen Qingqiu tells Luo Binghe to fight, Binghe doesn't even have a weapon at hand.
Actually, he doesn't have a sword at hand.
Turns out having your magical horse kick a demon to death is still pretty effective!
Shen Yuan even manages to avoid getting poisoned too. Rather, Elder Hammer threatens to poison him and Luo Binghe charges at him shouting "stay away from my horse! I'll kill you!" and etc, and does get nicked by the thorns, but only Binghe and Shen Yuan notice and of course the poison doesn't work on Binghe, congrats for unlocking a new hint as to Luo Binghe's mysterious origins!
Yes, Horse SY shows up to help Binghe in the Dream Demon event. He still looks like a horse for it, but it also marks the first time he's able to speak to Luo Binghe, which successfully distracts Luo Binghe from a lot of the tormenting visions of his past because talking magic horse friend has a way of doing that.
So the Dream Demon is like, that's not a normal horse, and Luo Binghe is all "stay away from my horse! I'll kill you!" and Shen Yuan gets knocked out of the dream as usual. Wakes up to Luo Binghe rushing to his stall to check on him and prepare him some nice warm congee and double-check that he can't talk for reals (only in dreams for now, alas).
Anyway Luo Binghe has no reason to hide his demonic cultivation practice from his horse, so Shen Yuan gets to sit in on it as Binghe tries to put Meng Mo's teachings into practice, which he finds super cool. Binghe's normal cultivation also progresses quite a bit, but he's still very much disadvantaged there because the beat peak is only giving him like, half-assed guest disciple status lessons, no personal one-and-one tutelage, and he's unofficially banned from Qing Jing and wouldn't get any help there anyway (apart from Ning Yingying). The beast peak lord isn't really his shizun and Shen Qingqiu isn't going to take Binghe to do things like claim a sword from Wan Jian, either.
Luckily, Binghe can now confer with his horse in his dreams! Shen Yuan has such helpful ideas as compelling various hall masters and combat teachers to dream about their lessons, so that Binghe can insert himself into the form of their students and supplement his tutelage with nighttime training from all around the sect. And also stealing some blank documents from An Ding and forging paperwork to turn over to Wan Jian to make it look like Binghe has permission to claim a spiritual sword without Shen Qingqiu's approval.
What a way to pass the time before the Immortal Alliance Conference!
Horse Shen Yuan would like very much to just carry Luo Binghe away in the opposite direction, thank you, but he does have a system and it is still holding a metaphorical gun to his head about this. Still, there's no force in the world that could keep Shen Yuan in his stable when shit starts to go down, or that could stop him from kicking the snot out of Shen Qingqiu when he tries to throw Binghe into the Abyss. (Binghe's thoughts on the fight: "stay away from my horse! I'll kill you!")
However, Binghe does still get thrown down, and Horse SY runs off whilst weeping crystalline tears of dismay as his mane whips in the wind, imagining a future where a blackened Luo Binghe returns for his revenge arc and symbolically sends his beloved horsie companion away forever to go frolic or some shit, which Shen Yuan is not interested in!
But what can he do? By the time Binghe gets out of the Abyss, his need for a horse will be decidedly minimal. It already went down a bunch when he finally got Zheng Yang (that Binghe somehow almost never flew anywhere on, surely for reasons unrelated to his bond with SY), and with Xin Mo and all his OP talents, even if he did keep Shen Yuan, wouldn't he become as much of a useless background character as countless auxiliary wives in his harem?
No! He won't stand for it! There has to be a way for him to convince even blackened Binghe that Shen Yuan is still the best ride in town!
Luckily, Shen Yuan knows where there are some power-ups that might be able to help him. While he won't touch anything that would be vital for the protagonist, he's more flexible on screwing over random future harem members or side characters, especially when it wouldn't even really harm them all that much. So while Binghe is going through his gauntlet of horrors in the Abyss, Shen Yuan embarks on his own level-up quest to dramatically increase his cultivation, and become more capable of keeping up with Binghe.
When this leads to Shen Yuan being able to take on a human form, he gets really excited, but that's mostly for personal comfort reasons. He can finally hold books again! And talk to people! Who cares if he looks like someone's ponysona gijinka, he can walk over to a stall and order meat buns!
Unicorn form is next, and it's... meh? Mostly it's a boost in his cultivation. The horn looks fun but doesn't really do much.
When he upgrades to being able to take on a pegasus form, now that's really cool. He can fly now! Not only is it crazy good fun, but it also increases his mobility exponentially. Surely riding a flying horse would be more comfortable than balancing on a sword, too?
But that's not enough for his actual goal, he needs to keep going until he finally finds the right bullshit mythical item that will do what he hopes:
Turn him into a dragon!
Unfortunately said bullshit item is in the demon realms, which are a fairly difficult place to navigate as either a horse or a human. Beefing up for the trip takes Shen Yuan just about two years, and requires all of his other upgrades. But he does it, he gets to the demon realms, eats the creatively named Dragon Fruit Plant, and... gets... stuck???
In his new dragon form???
WTF this didn't happen to the random ox that Luo Binghe fed the fruit to in order to create a suitable beast of burden to impress the husband of Wife No.666! Although, thinking about it, maybe it did because it wasn't like the ox ever turned back into an ox afterwards. But Shen Yuan just figured that was because it was a simple beast of burden and saw becoming a dragon as an overall upgrade, why go back? He honestly hadn't really thought about it!
Cue Luo Binghe getting out of the Abyss only to shortly find that a random dragon is following him around. Maybe that just happens here? It doesn't attack him, at least, and he has no time to deal with it (or to sleep) because his first order of business is establishing enough of a foothold in the demon realms to regain access to the human ones, and find out what happened to his horse. And then kill Shen Qingqiu. In that order.
1K notes · View notes
podcast-hemocytoblast · 11 months
Text
When you think about it, it was pretty on brand for Elias to start the apocalypse by giving Jon Evil Paperwork.
3K notes · View notes
magicalmyths · 3 months
Text
Rip Polites, you would've hated seeing Odysseus get stabbed
226 notes · View notes
weirdway-jester · 9 months
Text
Resident lover meme (but I draw it: pt1)
Tumblr media
Original image I got inspired from
Tumblr media
454 notes · View notes
knockknockitsnickels · 16 hours
Text
Tumblr media
I think this is one of my favorite lines from the Wraith route because of (imo) how much the meaning changes depending on if you got there via Spectre or Nightmare. For Spectre, it honestly strikes me as a genuine question. Why are you doing this to her? If you're on the Spectre route, you presumably already know the Narrator can't really be trusted, since you had to reject his reward to get here. What are you hoping to gain from continuing to hurt her? For Nightmare, it honestly just makes me sad. As the Shifting Mound describes her, "She desires only companionship, but the only thing she knows is how to hurt." This line feels like a plea from someone who genuinely doesn't understand why you keep rejecting her. She wants to be with you, but she just can't understand how to do that in a way which doesn't hurt you.
#at the risk of getting put on a list there is something tragic & relatable in nightmare#someone who desperately wants to make connections but just can't understand how#anyway wraith is one of my favorite princesses for stuff like this (and bc tragedy aside her route is a riot)#also im sorry if she doesn't say that line if you got there via nightmare#that's how i got her and i could've sworn she did? But i only found footage of her saying it in spectre#slay the princess#stp#stp wraith#the wraith#stp spectre#stp nightmare#side note archetypal/heart#(slash so i don't accidentally tag them)#pointed out on another post of mine that you get wraith via nightmare by killing her and via spectre by leaving her in the basement#in both cases its a rejection of her (rejection being one of wraith's main themes)#which makes me speculate on spectre's ch 3 (which i think we currently have very little info on?)#Trying to run from Nightmare should technically be a 'rejection' as well#but you get MOC from that (and from choosing to stay with her)#imo bc you're just repeating the same inaction which got you into this situation in the first place#you don't want to slay her. you don't want to set her free. So you just leave her there (again)#and so you get MOC where things have only gotten worse and you have no choice left. Because you chose *not* to take action again#So I wonder if spectre 3 will be a similar 'repeating your past mistakes' type of deal#i was skeptical about it coming from stabbing yourself while she possesses you or trying to crush her bones#but it does make sense with that in mind#im curious if it'll parallel MOC#except instead of having no choice but to free the princess you have no choice but to obey the narrator again#maybe you both end up stuck in the cabin forever again?#idk#sorry i probably should've put all of that tag in the post lmao
108 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Frank! fantasy flavor!
rambles:
i really wanted to blend that monk-class inspiration w/ Frank's personal vibe... i like to think that i Succeeded!
i turned his tie into a sort of brooch since, yk. bowties aren't all that Fantastical. they miss the style. also i think they'd be more comfortable with something smaller since he's very active and needs a wide range of maneuverability
i bet Eddie or someone wheedled them into adding the leather shoulder pauldrons - leather to keep it a bit more flexy, and also. it just looks Cool!
figuring out what would replace his vest was tough. i didn't want them to be entirely unprotected, but i couldn't give him straight armor. though i will admit! a sort of tight-fitting crop top was Considered! but i landed on a gambeson vest as the best fit - comfortable, flexible, a Vest, while providing some level of protection! also, gambesons are quilted, which fits Frank's diamond-checkered vest!
ive already mentioned that one of my favorite outfit things is Flowy Pants Tucked Into Boots, so... that choice wasn't very character driven. except the boots are a tall ankle wrap - for that extra stability and strength! their shoes are pretty flexible and are only a few steps away from being slippers.
and the half-skirt - open skirt? - thing (still don't know what its called) is purely some self indulgence. i think Frank looks great in skirts!! also imagining him Throwing Down w/ the added flair of the skirt... damn. it'd probably help confuse enemies too - what're they gonna do next? who knows! the skirt is in the way and adding extra Movement!
i like to think that his knife is either in a sheath attached to the back of the belt, or they have it on their thigh (under the skirt) like Wally's bag. he probably never uses it... punching is the way to go for Frank methinks. it's probably reserved for cutting ropes and fruit
speaking of punching.... wrist wraps! inspired by boxing gauze! pads his knuckles, keeps his wrist compressed, its the best choice for physical combat. though the wrapped knuckles probably always have blood showing through anyway... or no yeah it's mostly other people's blood...
as for scars - Frank probably has quite the collection! i imagine that they've been picking fights since a young age, and in such a dangerous world he probably got hit a Lot until they learned how to hit back. and hit back Well. still, i wanted to give him a cool face scar with a very lame backstory - a book with a crisp, sharp spine corner fell off a high shelf and bonked them in the face at juuuust the right angle <3 he probably stays very fucking quiet about it which makes everyone think there's some intense traumatic backstory behind it. there isn't. Frank's just embarrassed.
closing note: i imagine that Frank has zero magic. literally none. cannot wield it for shit cannot utilize it. he's just like Howdy fr
#im Very happy with this outfit ngl#they probably know a bunch of different fighting styles...#and then stitches them all together into a Frankenstyle#get it? frankenstein's monster + frank + style - yeah yeah i know im hilarious#he probably stresses everyone tf out with how gung-ho they are in a fight Without Much Protection#like yeah gambesons can cushion blows and depending on the quality can lessen or even stop arrows / stabs#but frank's is a Vest. yeah it covers his vital organ area but like. their face? arms? legs? its free target practice#everytime eddie sees frank throw himself at an enemy w/ magic or Much Bigger Than Frank#he has about 100 heart attacks#catch him sprinting to cover's franks ass. they need it#frank Will look at someone way above his pay grade and go 'yeah i can take em'#(and that's why they consistently end up under poppy's healing wing)#julie unfortunately is on the same bullshit as frank#so if frank takes on someone he cant handle - so will she. without blinking!#though when she (or anyone else) tries it that's when frank goes 'are you crazy?! dont fight them they'll kill you'#frank has common sense when it comes to other people <3 not themself <3#scribble salad#wh fantasy au#ah yes and the tiny knife... the glorified cheese knife...#even sally has a nice dagger and she's got some Powerful magic on her side#meanwhile frank is bringing fists to a gunfight smh#tryin ta think of a backstory for him for this au...#im thinking... he was either an orphan or his parents straight up Ditched him as a kid...#and he was taken in by a... fuck im missing the word. monastery? or something?#whatever it was it was run by somewhat spiritual people that raised & trained highly skilled/disciplined fighters#with the intent of 'you will fight for good blah blah blah'#maybe frank would sneak out and thats how he met julie? and he taught her some combat skills maybe...#& then he wound up running away w/ her or somethn#or he completed his training and went out to be a Soldier For Good but wound up following his own path & moral compass... idk
358 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media
something something destiny something something
93 notes · View notes
yxorul · 9 months
Text
Felt like doin this trend with my favorite (A)Mayas lmao :p
Tumblr media
I got into a lot of shows and content lately. It's hard to stay in one place, crazy lol
84 notes · View notes
thebad-lydrawn-sanses · 8 months
Note
Cross's assumption is correct, that's exactly what I'm implying. So be a good boy and lay down pls :3
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Cross: you-
Killer: implying what?
Cross: that they're gonna break my leg
Killer: .
↓ Damage Count ↓
999999999
999999999
999999999
999999999
124 notes · View notes
olessan · 20 hours
Text
Tumblr media
20 notes · View notes
lelalyo · 10 months
Text
Ok but when I was fighting Haarlep, he kept running in circles in Raphael's room and everytime he'd run past Astarion, Astarion would perform an [opportunity attack]. It hit EVERYTIME but not just that, because Haarlep had his back to him, it always looked like Astarion was stabbing Haarlep in the ass which, I headcanon, is how Raphael even knew we were in his house.
Oh and Haarlep charmed Gale which, I gotta be honest, I was disappointed in our resident wizard. All it took was an incubus running around in his underwear to make him changed sides, can't believe it, Gale. After all the magical items I fed him - I thought we were friends, man. We cast a spell together once, GALE. Where's the loyalty? This ain't one off either, first it was the harpies, now Haarlep, where does the betrayal end?
75 notes · View notes
simpingforclaudette · 11 months
Text
my favorite thing about the concept of a gordon/adam/hoffman love triangle is that it’d definitely end with everyone killing each other
84 notes · View notes
shaykai · 4 months
Note
I would love to hear more about Vat'il's past, I was desperately intrigued by the one comic-- I assume the shock collar aversion is the matron slapped it on him so she could have a way to control his Urge, but how'd he end up with her family? How long did he stay with the drow? When did sceleritas show up— [is dragged offstage]
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The shock collar is just something all of the servants in her house wear- she doesn’t know that he’s a Bhaalspawn/know about his Urge- to her understanding, he’s just a bit murder happy (which isn’t entirely out of the norm as far as drow culture goes)
Sceleritas showed up a little while before he killed his adoptive family, kind of bonding with him while also trying to encourage him to not neglect his Urges (he doesn’t listen and ends up killing his family via the Urge taking over 😔)
As far as getting to Menzoberranzan goes, he was captured while aimlessly wandering through the Underdark. Backstories are liable to change, but so far I’m going with Gwnn- a guard captain- gifted him to Valora- The Matron- as a courting gift. Initially speaking, he’s almost borderline decorational and mostly just serves to fetch and deliver things- until she finds out he has a penchant for killing things, and then he’s essentially her personal assassin
I’m not entirely sure on how long he’s there for, but so far it’s roughly about 10ish years- currently speaking, he escapes as a teenager :> (fun fact! He escapes after Sceleritas says that his Father wants him to come home and gives him the same little invisibility cloak you get in game from him)
23 notes · View notes
maegalkarven · 10 months
Text
No but I'm obsessed with the situationship where Durge and Karlach are friends, Durge and Gortash are lovers and Gortash and Karlach can't stand each other.
Also,depending on Durge, the Durgetash reveal can be messy af with both Durge and Karlach reacting violently, Karlach at the fact what her friend is the architect of that mess and Gortash's lover and Durge at her and the team's reaction.
Bonus point if Durge is loyal to Gortash to a fault bc they went against their Father's direct wishes bc of the affection towards that man, and everyone having an awful time dealing with it.
60 notes · View notes
queenusagiblog · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media
unnamed au...
63 notes · View notes