#im very sensitive to it and knowing adults in my life
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dimidarling · 1 year ago
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really truly awful to watch the adults in my life, especially ones who were adamant, consistent, and up-to-date about masking from the start, slowly start abandoning them. like y’all were, early on, making your own masks, masking everywhere, enforcing masking for us and others, taking issue with antimaskers, etc, and now because the world has decided to stop caring you’ve decided that too?? you’ve decided to willfully participate in the erasure of disabled ppl from public spaces? you’ve decided it doesn’t matter anymore just because numbers are “acceptably” lower (lots of ppl still die every day less data is being collected so ofc they seem lower than before)? you judge me and my sibling for being angry about that, for being uncomfortable around you after finding this out, for being upset people we trusted don’t care enough about our and other ppl’s safety?? the real covid exhaustion is watching the world go “back to normal" at the expense of others.
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astrobydalia · 11 months ago
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🪐 Astro Observations!!!✨
Happy 2024 babes! Here’s to another year sharing astrology stuff with all of you 🤩
work by astrobydalia
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Yes water moons have great intuition and could be psychic but I very often notice they tend to allow their personal feelings interfere with their decisions and could tend to not follow their intuition as much. The ones that have a more reliable or unbiased intuition imo are Earth moons and Aquarius moon.
Scorpio Venus really do gravitate to unhealthy relationships… All their connections tend to have unfair or imbalanced dynamics to them where there’s no equal give and take. They believe love means throwing yourself and your life away for another person (or they expect someone to give everything away for them) with little to nothing in return. They may not understand the difference between deep intimacy and unhealthy attachment
Libra placements and their ability to appear likable even when they have the shittiest personality deep down
In my opinion Moon is the most important planet if you really wanna begin to know someone at their core. Ultimately no planet can give you full info without the context of the whole chart tho (#AllPlanetsMatter), but you can really uncarcarve sm about someone just by moon placement/aspects/degree, etc. Moon rules your needs and so it really cements your personality and its an energy that you'll project in so many areas of your life (relationships, career, etc)
Fixed Mars are ARGUMENTATIVE fr fr. They need to have the last word and will die on that hill if they have to💀Honorable mention: Virgo/Gemini Mars due to Mercury influence but they’re more about friendly banter and aren’t as stubborn
80% of Aries Moons I've met were very philosophical/spiritual/religious. They can develop a self-awareness that gives them a lot of wisdom. The other 20% were just adult toddlers and very egotistic...
Capricorn placements and their internalized elitism. They really do believe some people are better than others which is the shadow of Capricorn unfortunately
Aquarius Moons are some of the most traumatized people I know fr fr. Whenever I get to know their life and backstory Im always like bro….😶😶 It makes me so sad cause they always bring such good vibes everywhere (they have a playful aura) when in reality there’s a depth of pain underneath you wouldn’t even fathom through that unbothered persona. The OG misunderstood.
We all know Scorpio is all about depth, intensity and looking beyond the surface but I’ve very often observed the exact opposite in scorpio placements. They could tend to be very superficial, greedy and materialistic, more obsessed with wealth and status than any earth placement (it all comes down to power). In such cases their interest in occult or deep topics could also be superficial or opportunistic, like they only see it as something that could give them a leg up in life or help them avoid unseen threats but that's about it.
Cancer Risings do not come across as sensitive at all. They tend to have a rather sassy personality and are pretty defensive 90% of the time tbh. Think about it, are crabs 🦀 cute and cuddly? No, you actually actually have to be very careful around one cause they sting lol. They do wear their heart on their sleeves and are very sensitive and perceptive but because of this they constantly feel like their vulnerability is out for everyone to see hence the guarded attitude.
^I've also noticed they are VERY opinionated and will hold on very tightly to how they think/feel about something. This results in having a reputation for being kinda bold and sharp (Aries 10th). Pro tip: do NOT question these native's morals or integrity unless you wanna see a very snappy side to them, they respond very very very badly if you even insinuate that they might be hypocritical in their values/what matters to them
The interpretation that Aquarius in the 4th house means you’re an outcasted black sheep in the family low-key doesn’t make sense to me tbh. Aquarius is the sign of camaraderie, friendship, inclusivity and community. All the people that I’ve seen with this placement were actually very bonded to their roots and considered their family (and the people they bonded with during childhood) to be "their people" (they also keep their friends close to heart). These natives do tend to distinct themselves as they grow up but this is due to Leo 10th house. I've noticed their family is in general very supportive of them or at the very least they received some input in their upbringing that made them feel special and/or like their uniqueness was celebrated. Feel free to share your opinion/experience tho
I've noticed Virgo Mars people have a perfect balance between being confident in themselves and fulling trusting their abilities while also staying humble and acknowledge room for improvement. Very mature and self-accountable and they're also great people to work with cause they are highly appreciative of good contribution
Sagittarius placements and their ability to be casually rude in a charming way??? 😭
Moon in the 10th house do not have a reputation for being emotional at all, it's quite the opposite they dislike exposing their feelings like that. A lot of their energy is spent trying to appear put-together and emotionally stable. The ones I've noticed have a reputation for being moody or sensitive are Mars in the 10th house
Venus-Moon aspects probably grew up in an environment that fed up this idea they had to be beautiful and conventionally likable in order to be worthy of love. These natives tend to base their self-worth on the amount of emotional validation they get from others and struggle telling the difference between kindness and love
A couple notes on everyone’s fave topic: 8th house synastry
We all know this overlay deals with power dynamics. On a general basis I’ve noticed it’s the planet person who tends to have the upper hand. Exeption: Moon. When your moon falls in someone’s 8th house you tend to be vulnerable one due to the soft nature of this planet, but the house person secretly feels more intimidated
You will NAWT be able to keep secrets from someone you have 8th house synastry with specially if you’re the house person. Sooner or later they’ll see through you, circumstances might force you to expose yourself or you’ll simply feel drawn to revealing the truth to them. With water synastry in general you will feel drawn to share more deep or hidden parts of yourself/your life but with the 8th house you can’t help it, like there’s almost an accusatory tension between the two that grows the more you try to hide something from them
Something I see no one mentioning about 8th house synastry is the planet person always feels intimidated by the house person's success. The planet person will try to take part in the house person's success by taking some credit and have a sense of control over what belongs to the house person, it's giving Kanye's "I made that bitch famous". At best the planet person would want to help boost the house person's endeavors. Either way, when someone's planets land on your 8th house, you will never feel like something is completely yours anymore, somehow the planet person will "take" something away from you that you can't get back making you feel like you owe them or they owe you something big (8th house=debt), which is why this overlay very often goes south and tends to be very depleting.
If we're talking business (which 8th house deals with that) the house person is likely to take a risk on the planet person, invest on them (can be money, time, resources, trust, etc) in hopes that it'll pay off. The house person is most likely to loose something from their involvement with the planet person, but they can also gain a lot from the planet person if the investment pays off. In either case, one could tend to exploit the other if there’s any ill intent from the individual
Water mars people are very smothering in their affection tbh. Once you’ve been chosen, get ready to be bombarded by their attention a bit more each time. Secret stalker vibes.This doesn’t always mean they love you tho, if underdeveloped they may want to “bond” in order to have emotional control over you and use you. For them it’s easy to get what they want through manipulation so leading people on or fooling around is something they tend to do a lot
Going back to the affection topic, water venus are smothering too but they go about their obsession devotion in a much more soft and non-domineering way where they give a lot of power away to their partner
People with Gemini+Scorpio placements in their chart embody the mischievous trickster archetype fr fr. They’re funny but also a menace. Have an ease to become that type of deceitful manipulator who thrives in chaos
I have a theory that your Moon represents the kind of bond or relationship you have with your mother but Ceres represents how your mother actually is
Capricorn and Scorpio placements are huge tsunderes imo 😭
Chiron in Sagittarius/9th house have become disappointed with religious and/or academic institutions. For them both systems are essentially flawed and don't work or don't make sense
+When it comes to religion I've seen a lot of them being atheist and skeptics. Some others still believed in god/universe/etc. but they did not want to support any stablished religious institution and instead have preferred to craft their own belief system. In both cases, they saw the institutionalization of believe systems as something that hindered their freedom of thought and expansion
+When it comes to academics a very similar thing happens. They felt like collage and the educational system restricted their mind instead of expanding it so they just preferred to walk their own path and find growth elsewhere. A friend of mine with this placement quit collage and the other people I've seen who did finish it all said they had a kinda dreadful and/or unfulfilling collage experience which they low-key regret
If you’ve ever felt powerless in the house where you have your pluto, that’s because you gave your power away to the opposite house. For example, if you have Pluto in the 5th house and you felt powerless when it comes to expression, your creativity, etc that’s because you gave too much power to the public opinion/peer pressure (11th house) and what they may say about you if you express yourself genuinely
Scorpio Moons always battle with that "am I a good person?", "am I a monster deep down?" inner conflict. They are more in touch with darker emotions and experiences than the average person so for them it's particularly easy to channel their shadow. This can often make them doubt their own integrity or think they are doomed to never feel happiness and inner peace. This is moon's debilitation for a reason, their inner emotional world is ruled by chaos and turmoil and they tend to be a bit too comfortable (moon) in toxicity and drama, nothing is ever light-hearted for them. If developed this ability of staying in touch with the shadow side of things can actually give them lots of awareness and resilience for the darker sides of the world as well as a very solid moral compass and compassion
Leo Moons likely had grandiose standards forced on them that inflated their self-importance. It's giving "mommy told me I am the best and most special of all" which is great but now they be carrying that mindset for the rest of their lives and this is where lot of their infamous sensitivity and fragile ego comes from cause not fulfilling these standards deeply hurts their heart. In consequence they tend to be more unprepared to accept humbling experiences that'll make them mature
virgo risings are funny!!!! I haven't seen anyone mention this, but every virgo rising I've met cracked me UP, they are so witty and never misse a chance to throw in a cheeky joke every 2 minutes. I think this is overlooked because they keep a rather awkward demeanor to them which often makes for a rather dry delivery. Best examples of this are Ryan Raynolds, Keanue Reeves, Emma Watson, Cole Sprouse...
Also, all Virgo risings I've met tend to come across as huge snobs so it's very common that people don't take their humor or friendliness seriously
Honestly I've noticed this theme with Virgo/6th house inner placements in general where their judgemental nature always makes them unfriendly or snarky to some degree. They can be the kind of people who are never happy with anything and always have a bone to pick.
My main theory as to why Leo risings are the most shy out of all Leo placements is because a lot of them grew up in very problematic and dysfunctional families (Scorpio 4th house) where they were shamed for showing vulnerability or being genuine (Cancer 12th house)
I’ve noticed Aries Suns and Capricorn Suns tend to relate a lot to their fathers, they tend to have very similar character traits as their fathers. For good or for bad their relationship with their father is always very important in their personality.
I find that LEO Suns and Sagittarius Suns always be having daddy issues tho like 😭😭😭😭
One thing about Capricorn is they can be literal billionaires and yet will still refuse to spend a dime on something they think is not worth it
Mutable Moons don’t commit 10000% to things, they’re the type to always have a foot out just in case. They're most likely to commit to things if they don't feel forced or expected to stay permanently
Cardinal energy is very consistent and responsable. People with prominent cardinal placements have a really developed sense of agency, focus and direction (imo this will be more obvious with moon, mars and asc). There's something about them that always gives me this put together "I've got this" kinda vibe, they always seem like they've got it together and always know what to do even when they're lost.
Fixed mercuries and their inability to understand or accept that two different points can be true
Sun/Leo in the 3rd house could want to have a nice car, an expensive or luxurious car from a well-known brand
I’ve seen people saying Venus-Mars conjunction gives it girl vibes. This is also HIGHLY true for Mars-ruled Venus (Aries/Scorpio Venus) or Venus-ruled Mars (Libra/Taurus Mars)
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work by astrobydalia
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eepy-evie · 6 months ago
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Twisted Wonderland Senior Headcanons
A/N: i am very tired as i write this, BIBI is saving my life force. I just got screamed at by my mom but the fans (no one) can’t wait 😎. Im sorry Lilia’s is kind of short, im pretty high and have been pushing this off for days.
Contents: Various non romantic headcanons for the seniors in TWST
Trigger warnings (if any): Religion mentions (Trey’s + Leona’s + Vil’s + Rook’s + Idia’s part), eating disorders (Vil’s part), stalking mentions (Rook’s part… no surprise), minor adult themes (idia’s part)
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Trey Clover
I might have this feeling only because i also bake but he has beef with multiple people about bread.
Like i mean people spreading misinformation (NO YOU DO NOT NEED TO ADD SUGAR INTO BREAD, IT DOESN’T DO MUCH)
Besides my personal beef with ig bakers…
He doesn’t listen to music, lofi background stuff at best.
He’d listen to anything someone put on with no complaint but he doesn’t feel the need for music for mundane things
With his obsession with brushing teeth i feel like he loves mint
Like i mean spearmint gum constantly, mint chocolate chip ice cream, idk mint leaves in drinks?
Bro can not understand if someone else doesn’t like mint
I believe he is an Atheist living in a Christian household
Its probably brought up rarely but he just doesn’t really believe that saying grace before dinner does anything
I think he’s way too empathetic for his own good, i mean like excusing lots of harmful things due to how someone was raised
(Totally didn’t mean to refer to Riddle but whatevs)
Cater Diamond
Get this man into kpop NOW
I feel he is rivaling Idia with his, honestly abusive, amount of slang
I dont think anyone who isn’t chronically online could stand to hear his thoughts
Or who isn’t insanely mentally unstable
But he pulls shit like “she=onika ate=burgers” every single chance he gets
Which i wont blame him for that, i pull medieval slang every second i can too
He loves brittany broski with his whole heart and soul
Not only is she funny as hell but she can also be very serious in a blink of an eye
On the low he enjoys those insider videos
He likes watching them and pausing them to argue the point to no one
Going back to kpop briefly…
He loves Aespa
Do i know any of the members of Aespa to tell you my assumed bias? No.
Also loves Zerobaseone
Ricky bias
Although i may be biased (oh my a silly pun, you scoundrel)
I do believe that he is a funny person but he is very repressed
I dont mean to make this a whole angst post but he genuinely doesn’t understand how he can express it
He is very sensitive to rejection so i think that leads him to extreme lengths to be liked
And I’m not just talking about how he acts a certain way to please others
I mean a deep rooted guilt for not being what someone wanted
Leona Kingscholar
…all my headcanons for him are purely how I’d personally treat him
Someone get this man a mukbang video and a comfy bed
He barely listens to music but when he does its some rnb stuff
He doesnt care for stuff thats too loud but he does like soft music even if he isnt open about it
I need to make him see nekomimi switch, twitter.gov, and anything else that has catgirls/boys so i can see his reaction
I dont think he holds many physical attributes to lions besides the ears, tail, and teeth but he most definitely holds many reactions and other stuff
Like he is literally sleeping in a garden most the time
He has long(er) nails and hates cutting them
Erm… idk man
I think he had a big Religious breakdown in his childhood
I dont really know what Religion he’d be to start with(due to my lack of knowledge of Religion in Africa) but he’d have the whole moment of betrayal
And then he’s completely Atheist for the rest of his life
Vil Schoenheit
He has a side account where he responds to all his hate comments
For music taste… hear me out…
He likes, on the low, vkei
But no metal like kaneto juusei or gulu gulu I mean malice mizer
He enjoys the instrumental along with the twists they take on classical
Moi meme motie x Vil Schoenheit collab when???
He 100% doesn’t express it though, he tells the public he likes whatever’s popular
I feel like, this may or may not be me projecting, he’s a hellenist
Obviously worshipping Aphrodite and has an altar for her which he never publicly speaks of but is not hiding
heres a bit of TW for eds + that type of stuff
I feel like he has an extremely bad relationship with food
He doesnt see it as something to nourish your body but instead a sort of numbers game
Like with a limit of however much someone says and the whole game is to stay under that number in calories
Besides that i feel he’s very orthorexic to the point he’d refuse to eat something if it looked too “bad” to him
(End of tw)
I know he has a very argued gender identity but i dont think he’s too confused by it
He’s very firm that he is who he is and he never seemed to have much of an inside problem with it
Maybe he got poked fun at a few times but thats all his problems with it
Rook Hunt
Get this man away from me
He is in many fandoms and somehow knows everything going on all the time
Bro personally took down Nayeon’s stalker by himself
But seriously i dont think his intentions are bad, i think he is just trying to be on top of everything in the worst was possible
He doesn’t really think its creepy himself but most the time he is
He is also a Hellenist who worships Aphrodite but also Artemis
He is so very open about his Religion
He makes those hopecore videos on tiktok and has amassed 10k followers but no one knows its him
Yearns to be in the south/midwest for the scenery
Just yearns in general
Bro is single handedly bringing back male yearning and being chalant
Saw bridgerton as a normal tuesday for him
1000 hours on c.ai
I will not, and should not, elaborate.
Is that projecting? Yes. Do i care? No.
He has the longest and some how most effective body/skincare routine ever
I mean like he’d do some shit like “once in a blue moon bath in pure hyaluronic acid for 2.5 hours on the dot”
He loves absolutely everything on everyone and its to a detriment to me personally
Hooked nose? Loved. Chubby? Love. Literally anything unconventional? Consider yourself yearned for.
He listens to anything and everything
Although he cant stand songs about break ups or anything to do with hate
Put this man on “doughnut” by TWICE now.
Idia Shroud
Yes… give me this nerdy man…
He 100% (mostly canon) loves jpop idols
Prolly an akb48 stan
I cant even get started on everything he likes
But i can tell y’all 100% that he is not overly flirty or overly easy to fluster
Istg all i see is either big dom idia or uwu shy boy idia
And both are wrong (in my opinion ig)
He starts arguments about anything and everything in game chats
Because he’s grown up in this big company family he was forced to appear better that how he truly acts so i believe that would also entail with being a die hard hellenist
But without any spotlights he does care, he just likes his games and anime
Speaking of anime…
He loves shoujo, he’s in hiding though
He literally wants to be sawako from “from me to you” but will never say it
Somebody come get this man
If anyone asks he just loves Naruto and One Piece
But we know the truth…
Istg he plays an absurd amount of eroges for the plot
He’s depraved on twitter
Two accounts, one for public image and the other for the unspeakable
Do NOT let him find any dating advice on there cause he will take it and act like a fool
He loves breakcore music and anime intros and thats about it
Besides his jpop idols
I dont think he like kpop, for some reason he just has a grudge against some fans
A little self insert but he 100% has autism (as we all know…) but he also has arfid
For those who dont know… arfid is “avoidant restrictive food intake disorder” which is like you are a very picky eater
He aint struggling with it, he succeeding (LYING)
Malleus Draconia
Get this man a cat or some shit like that
Can someone please make him watch all of aphmau Minecraft diaries and then twilight back to back
This strange individual has that man from the notebook shaking in fear
Bros a hopeful romantic
Randomly says inspiration quotes that you cant find anywhere online
It just came from his heart
He only listens to classical songs he knows how to play
Though i’d doubt if you showed him something he’d dislike it
Bros the yearner
I showed up to the yearning contest and went into anaphylactic shock at the sight of him there
He has honestly researched every single religion for fun
Highlight god damn bible verses for no reason
He needs to make an iceberg of every single religion and why they are good/bad
I just know he has an insane knowledge of lore in any book he’s ever read
Please make him watch smiling friends
You’d have to pause every 5 seconds so he can process it
You could make him do anything tbh, just be like “you should come watch *whatever it is* with me” and bro is outside your door
For shame with the amazing attention towards practically anyone who shows anything besides fear or hatred comes the fact he is unaware of most modern things
He has a tamagotchi and thats it man, get him a 3ds at least
He cant use a phone, cant use a computer, and barely understands the concept of social media
But at least he has the spirit to learn
Lilia Vanrouge
Do i even put him as a senior?
Bro is pushing some mystical number that no one knows
He’s like one of those grandmas that never mention their age and whenever its brought up all they say is “never ask a woman her age”
… perchance a bit controversial but i think he’s bad at cooking on purpose
Ain’t no way someone fucks up cooking THAT bad
I think he really likes horror games
And i dont mean those shitty mascot horrors like poppys playtime
I mean fatal frame, faith, and visage type shit
He listens to breakcore too
I dont make the rules
Hes a gamer grandpa so he either has to have pretty good taste in games/music or the absolute worst
HE’D LOVE GULU GULU AND VKEI
Hes practically already mana sama
Hes got all the moi meme motie dresses
Get grandpa off taobao NOW
I want my nyanya madoka dress, and i will not be stopped by some twinkish old man.
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shallyouobeyme · 1 year ago
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For the “spicy” prompt im imagining Platonic Yandere Batfam discovering your internet history, and having a confrontation about how you’re far too young for such things (reader is a full adult, not that the Batfam sees it that way).
I sadly already have something written out for today, but I really love this idea so I decided that I'd just go into the concept a bit as well - I mean I make the rules to this so I might as well use that power.
Okay, so I don't really write smut as of now because I don't read it and I do have not a lot of real-life experience so I figure it might just be a lot of cringy blabbering. But let's go with the 'spicey' meaning that horny adolescents will probably think of when reading the word in the context of fanfiction.
Now you're probably somewhere in the span of 16-20 in this scenario, old enough to live independently on your own, but young enough that the batfam can somehow justify it in their mind to treat you like a precious, fragile, little toddler. Sure, some of them logically know that you're basically a grown-up, but with how much effed-up shit they see every day they don't really wanna admit that to themselves and rather chose to act all 'I do not see'. And while that's all fine and dandy for them to do, it doesn't change the logical facts. Fact number one: You grew out of binkies and blankies like a decade ago, for god's sake Dick stop trying to make me take ten naps a day with them. Fact number two: Like I said, you're kind of (definitely) an adult and assuming that you have not always been the coddled little Wayne-baby that the Batfam wants to see you as you've probably been exposed to adult things before and aren't sensitive with seeing them. Like, guys, I was reading the news daily before you crazy people kidnapped me - stop talking about international crises as if the countries are people who have minor disagreements, okay? Fact number three: there comes a time in an adult's life when they might be craving a somewhat more intimate partner in their life - and no, Damian, I don't mean the bestest friend in the whole world forever, I mean a guy or a gal or a nonbinary pal who can rock your shit, if you get my drift (never dare say that to Damian out loud tho, you will be having your mouth washed out with soap). So while it might be a giant oversight on your part to not realize that all your precious internet time is completely monitored, you still probably haven't expected to be sat down by Bruce, Dick, Jason and Alfred and get a lecture on how you're way too little to look up these kinds of things (you looked up TikTok videos and happened to watch a few with TikTokers dancing in slightly less covered clothing) and how your mind is too undeveloped to grasp these big things you searched for (you looked up a statistic on the rate of kidnapping victims to get killed) and how you should keep playing your safe games instead of these violent ones (you looked at a game trailer for Cyberpunk 2077).
All your arguing falls on deaf ears. They just don't wanna hear that you're not their little, innocent baby. The only good thing is that they don't think you have enough logical thinking skills yet to properly grasp the situation so you'll be punished very lightly (a month without internet privileges). Once you're allowed to go online again though, you'll have to make do with the special kiddy-pad they got you with all the safety features and parental controls installed. So yeah, might wanna get used to being without the internet from now on...
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poppy-metal · 6 months ago
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oh you’ve convinced me. it hurts more if he never cheated on reader in the failmarriage because what consumes reader is the uncontrollable wanting but feeling guilty. also reader with patrick lore is insaneeee!!! i wanna know what tashi feels about it all - I really enjoy this story
I've put you in my pot so you can feel what im cooking... the ingredients.....
tashi is so fun to think about - she's complex about alot of things, but funnily enough, her thoughts on marriage and sex and love are very simple. you do what makes you feels good, what benefits you most of all. what benefits her - is having everyone she cares about under one roof, in the same space. she understands there's complexity in that. in college, she understood she couldn't just propose you all just fuck eachother - though she definitely thought about it - so she did her best to play a game where you'd all come out as winners. she loves patrick, her and patrick are very in tune with eachother, they have alot of fun - it wasn't hard to marry him. and you and art getting married made sense as well. it was good, maybe when you were all grown adults with more wordly experience, she'd revisit the idea of being intimate with eachother. shes aware of arts feelings for her, aware of her own, her and patrick have talked about it - he's not subtle. her and patrick talk alot of art during - mostly during sex. and then there's you - who tashi is strangely soft towards. tashi has never once held herself back, but she does around you, because you're a sensitive thing. her showing mutual interest in art would break you - and she doesn't want that. because she loves you. perhaps even more than art and patrick. its a tender kind of love. sweet. she wants you, but she knows being too forward about that would make you shrink away. so she bides her time. they dont talk about you during sex, her and patrick, but they both think about you - she knows it. can tell by the way patrick will be looking at you one day, at the way your dress flutters up your thighs in the hot summer sun, and she'll know when patrick bends her over later and slides inside her thick and hot - he's imagining its your cunt hes sinking into - she doesn't mind. not when an image of you in your little panties she'd seen you in when you went shopping together, and she'd seen you in the changing room, that glimpse of pink fabric - its that image she thinks of when she cums.
but then you dont show up to her and patricks wedding. and you have her blocked - both her and patrick - on all accounts. and when she asks art about it he shrugs uncomfortably and mumbles some excuse for you, like you're just busy or you're going through something and tashi feels angry. for awhile she thinks of stealing art away, of just kissing him - just to get a rise out of you. but then she thinks of how much that would hurt you, and she doesn't. she stays perfectly platonic with art and shovels the pain of her ejection from your life deep down. she tries to nudge art gently into being more open with you, reaching out to you through him, but you never reach out.
when the separation happens and art moves in with her and patrick - she's a little annoyed by the whole thing. its just so meaningless, this fight, in her eyes. she can see you're miserable- from the burner accounts she uses to stalk you. your game isn't familiar to her - but alright, she's willing to play it. she wont hold back with art anymore. she'll break the unspoken truce you two had where she wont impose on you and come into your space - because you're obviously playing a long game of tennis here. she feels better when she realizes that. alot calmer. it always comes back to tennis.
and tashi dominates the court.
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trincketbox · 1 year ago
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Jason Todd as a Trans (ftm) allegory
Written by me, a trans man
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[this edit was made by me, original picture it's Dan Mora's sketch]
TW gender disphoria, (implied) transphobia.
Im not saying his story was written with this perspective in mind, Im saying *death of the author (*the reinterpretation of artistic creations by the public both as a community and aa individuals, and how this goes far beyond the creator's original message on mind) is a very real thing.
This narrative resonated with me, a trans man, and my experience as such. Maybe out there is another transmasc person who caught themselves invested in this character the same way as I, and maybe they'll read this post and be happy to found out they're not alone on these feelings.
Without further addue, let's begin.
The second Robin, and the feeling of not fitting
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Every trans person first memory of perceiving oneself as somehow different (and how) it's particular to each.
Some realize pretty young, some older. Some always have this lingering feeling of not belonging but become conscious of it later in life.
This feeling its present trough all of Jason's life. First, when he first arrives at the Manor. Later, when he starts operating as Robin. Then when Tim "replaces him", and so on.
Usually labelled as the black lamb of the family.
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Tragedy is always, first, born off love
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Jason's death and resurrection is written as a tragedy (no shit, Sherlock). But there, to be a tragedy, there has to be hope first. There has to be love.
Now, this varies from version to version, but a general consence is that Jason Todd was loved by Bruce Wayne, regardless of how much their relationship might change and twist on the future; Jason Todd was a good kid, regardless of how he might be portrayed as recless. He was a traumatized, angry kid who wanted to make things better. Who wished for bad guys to not hurt people anymore. Who wished to change the system for better, and took the matter on his own hands both as a child and as a young adult.
This
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This right here
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Was a loved, brave, bold, sensitive, mischievous, smart child who would latter come back like this:
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Demanding justice, demanding damnation for al the pain he went through, demanding retaliation to the monster that set him off this world.
And all these requests fell to the ears of Bruce Wayne, Batman. The man who took him in as a scared, bold litte child that beated him in the cold of the night in the alley where his parents died. He stole his car tires, he's a child and he stole his car tires and he made Batman laugh.
That Perception doesn't change with his rise from the dead.
What changes is Bruce's view of him now.
Now, this depends on the writer, but on the start of Jason's "coming back to Gotham to fight Bruce" arc, there is the accusation of him coming back wrong.
Of him being better before
Of something being wrong with him since the start.
The implications of his physical change as wrong in comparation to his younger self.
I find Jason's body dismorphia due to The Lazarus Pit™ very interesting,but in this case Im not referring to it as a comparation with body disphoria (even through, he does get the feeling of your body changing in ways out of your control and the trauma that surrounds it).
Im talking about Bruce's view on all of this.
Luckily, if you're trans and had supportive parents, you won't know these things by first hand experience, but many, many people do.
And Jason gets it.
Jason Todd its womanhood™ coded
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This is, partially, one of th main reasons why his fanbase consists on a large part of fangirls.
Repressed rage upon the injustices you go through all your life, and once the last drop falls, said rage is weaponized. Seen as dirty, as over the top, as dangerous.
Your older self being compared to your younger self, being asked (directly or indirectly) where that sweet child™ went.
Being striped away from your body autonomy (murder, torture, resurrection against his will, whatever is going on in Batman Gotham War).
Being labeled as the most sensitive. Sometimes in a good light, sometimes not.
The burning weight of still loving parental figures that hurted you.
Topping it all, it's implied through many instances he's a feminist (yes, Im aware this is also heavily influenced by fanon interpretations of the character, but you can't deny it's still heavily implied).
All of these issues almost universal (however not exclusive) to AFAB people life experience.
There is this recognition in these wounds. "He gets it", you feel, he gets it.
He gets it in a similar way transmasc individual have an undeniable insight of these issues. He gets it in a way that feels genuine, familiar, personal.
Lastly but nor least important,
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He gives me gender™ vibes. That's it, that's the argument
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Over all, Jason Todd its a multifaceted, complex character. He's morally grey, his temperament ranging and mutating with each reinterpretation. Some core issues stick, others don't.
I do not hold the one and only right interpretation of this character.
We can al agree, nevertheless, that even through he's not canonically trans,
Jason todd would be a great trans ally, fighting by our side, in name of our rights, our pain but also our pride.
For that's what heroes do.
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rafecameronsmistress · 2 years ago
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NO ESCAPE
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description] Fem Reader x Rafe Cameron x Barry
[summary] After a rough breakup Rafe sends Barry out to find you at a party and what they have for you in store is a nightmare full of pleasure
[cw + tw] 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, abusive relationship, physical abuse, strong language, stalking, non con, alcohol use, drug use, gun use, life threatening, degrading talk, angst, fear, embarrassment, SMUT
[authors note] this one is VERY long and has VERY sensitive triggers, please read at your own risk
‼️ADULT CONTENT AHEAD‼️
Enjoy 🖤
________________________________
Text messages:
- Kie: hey are you coming to Sarah’s party tonight? it’s at the water, i can pick you up
- y/n: i dont know.. after everything that happened with Rafe im afraid he’ll show up and i don’t want to see him right now
- Kie: Sarah told me he wasn’t going because she invited pogues lmao
- y/n: i’ll think about it, i’ll call you in an hour or so
- Kie: kk <3
Rafe and i dated for a year before things got bad, we had our ups and downs but never did i expect him to put his hands on me in a violent way
Rafe hit me for the first time a month ago, he said he was sorry and that he just couldn’t handle the way things were going with his family and business
i gave him the benefit of the doubt because he has been under so much stress and sometimes i add to the problem
two days later he hit me again and split my lip open then screamed in my face because i got blood on his shirt
slowly his i love you’s turned into i hate you’s
it’s hard because i love him so much, he was the picture boyfriend, until he wasn’t
i hid the abuse, i didn’t want people to know, just incase he changed
my friends know we ended badly but they just assumed it’s because Rafe is an asshole, everybody knows he is
the first time he threatened to kill me was the day that i left, that was only a week ago
he held me down on the floor of his bedroom with one hand around my throat and the other holding his pistol to my temple “the next time you speak to me like that again i’m going to put a bullet in your fucking skull, DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?” his words spit on me like venom
a part of me misses him and that’s why i don’t want to see him tonight, i’ll cave and end up going home with him, i know i will, because i love him
i lay down in bed and close my eyes, i’ll make a decision in a little while
i fall asleep for a few hours and when i wake up i have another text from Kie
Kie: so Sarah and i decided you ARE coming because we need you!! she told me Rafe will not be there, the boys are coming too nothing bad is going to happen!! get dressed bitch i’ll pick you up at 7
i text JJ, John B, and Pope in a group chat
- me: hey all 3 of you are going to Sarah’s party tonight right?
- John B: yeah i’m here now helping her set up
- Pope: yes i’m picking Cleo up soon
- JJ: yep Kie called me and told me that you’re afraid Captain Douchebag will show up so obviously i will be there… and i would like to drink some alcohol…
- me: thanks boys, see you later <3
i let out a sigh of relief, at least those 3 will be able to handle Rafe if he shows up
i undress myself to take a shower and run my fingers over my yellow healing rib cage where Rafe had kicked me a couple weeks ago
tonight will be fun. tonight will be fun. tonight will be fun. i try to convince myself, i deserve to go out
after i shower i do my hair and makeup then get dressed
i throw on a short pink dress and my birkenstock sandals
7:03pm
text message
- Kie: i’m here
Kie is in my driveway playing music on full blast and dancing like a nut which makes me laugh, i’m always thankful for her trying to lift my spirits
We jam out in the car and get ourselves pumped for the party
When we get there i scan the entire lot for Rafes pickup or dirt bike, neither of which i see
“Relax y/n, he’s not coming” Kie says, she grabs my hand and holds it, we share a smile, hers excited, mine nervous
A giant bonfire glows in the middle of a heard of people
Loud music, beer, liquor, and over 100 people- kooks and pogues combined…
if Rafe isn’t coming, he at least has someone watching
i immediately grab a drink to loosen up so i can enjoy tonight, the first one goes down like water so i pour myself a second
“whoaaa slow down there killa, you’re drinking like me right now!” JJ laughs while nudging my arm “i’ll be right here all night, enjoy yourself, i got you” he says with the sweetest smile
i’m on my 3rd drink and 2nd shot, my cheeks feel rosy and i have the urge to move my hips “Sarah! come dance with me!” i demand while holding out my hand
“sorry babe, my girl needs me” she says to John B getting up from his lap, she grabs hold of my hand and we dance, solo cups in the air
the boys stay close by and enjoy watching us make a fool of our selves while they smoke a joint
my phone vibrates
text message:
- Rafe: don’t drink so much, you’ll get sick
tunnel vision. nausea. panic. swallow it, don’t let anybody know.
“i’ll be right back” i tell Sarah “i need to fill my cup”
“okay” she furrows her eyebrows “you okay?”
i give her a nod and the best smile i could
once i’m out of sight i run to Kie’s car, hopping in and locking the doors, i need to sit down, my heart is pounding out of my chest, i can hear the blood rushing in my ears
*knock knock* i jump out of my skin, i’m met face to face with Barry
“open the door sweetheart” he smiles flashing his gold teeth
this can’t be happening.
i go to grab my phone to call JJ. where is my it?
Barry waves my phone in front of my face taunting me. how the fuck did i drop it?
“open the door y/n, don’t make this difficult” he tugs on the handle “open it, i’m not playing witchu right now” i shake my head “country club wants you to come wit me, y’aint safe here without him” his eyes grow darker, i don’t budge
he gets on the phone, he’s calling Rafe “you either come out on your own or i call him and he pulls you out, your choice” i’m scared. i don’t want to make Rafe mad. but i don’t want to see him. i’m getting a headache.
i make the dumbest decision of my life. i open the door, my hands shaking 100mph.
“that’s it, let’s get you home” he says grabbing my hand hard
my face is burning up. my legs grow weak under me. i’m stone cold sober at this point.
we approach the truck, “Barry please“ i plead “i’m sorry mama, y’know him” he helps me into the passenger seat and buckles me in, “can i have my phone please, i need to tell my friends i went home” i cry “can’t letchu do that, what’s ya password, i’ll text ‘em for you” he says, i shake my head rejecting the offer
he starts the truck and we take off
his phone rings “yeah i got her, she was a good girl, she didn’t fight me” he smirks “we’ll be there soon”
i stay silent, Barry puts his hand on my thigh and i flinch at his touch “what’s wrong sweet thing, scared of a little love?” he laughs
we pull up to Tannyhill, Rafe is standing out front with a whiskey glass in his hand, he raises it and smiles at me
my stomach is in knots
i want to scream for help and run
the other half of me wants to jump into his arms and submit
Barry gets out of the truck and walks around opening my door “c’mon, get out” i jump down and fix my dress and fix a smile in attempt to hide my mixed feelings
“you look nice, who’d you get dressed up for?” Rafe asks “nobody” i reply, he laughs “sexy little thing isn’t she?” he asks Barry, “yessir” he grins
i want to crawl inside my own skin
Rafe grabs me by the arm “let’s get inside” he looks at Barry “you comin? you’re not gonna want to miss this”
he brings me to the couch and sits me down, “what to do with you?” he ponders finishing his drink
“Rafe i want to go home” i whimper
“and you know what i want? a girlfriend that doesn’t dress like a slut and go to parties without me” he seethes “since you wanna act like a slut, take your clothes off, i’ll treat you like a slut” his eyes filled with fury
“i’m not your girlfriend anymore” i whisper
“what was that?” he cocks his head to the side
“nothing” i say
i stand up and slowly pull my dress over my head, my knees becoming weak, leaving me exposed in just my panties in front of him and Barry
“lay down on the couch” he demands, i obey “now touch yourself”
“Rafe please i-“ there’s no use in begging, i bring one hand down to my pussy and run it up and down my panties, the thought of them watching begins to turn me on no matter how hard i try to reject the feeling
“she’s sweet” Barry says licking his lips
“wait til you taste her” Rafe says deviously
their words go straight to my heat, i rub my clit in circles arching my back, trying not to let out a sound
“come here” i say holding my hand out to Rafe, my pussy aching for him
“you’re gonna finish yourself off first” he smirks
Barry adjusts himself clearly growing hard, Rafe watches me like a hawk not missing a beat
i pick up the pace now craving dick inside of me, i throw my head back and whimper coming closer to an orgasm, the band in my belly snaps and my legs start convulsing, i ride out my orgasm and when i’m finished i beg to be fucked “come here- please”
Rafe looks at Barry “try her out” he says patting him on the back
the look of fear on my face. Rafe would never let someone else look at me nevermind fuck me.
“since you wanna act like a slut..” he says shrugging his shoulders, then topping off his whiskey
i become embarrassed, im attracted to Barry but being on display is not something im used to
Barry gets comfortable in the chair and pats his lap, he undoes his belt and slides his pants down to his knees, his hard on is enormous even through his boxers
i try to contain my arousal and walk toward him, looking at Rafe for approval, he nods
i lower myself to my knees and pull Barry’s erection from his boxers, it fills my entire hand
“i ain’t even gotta ask to get my dick sucked, you got this one trained man” he laughs
Rafe walks behind me and manspreads on the couch enjoying every second of this
i seal my mouth on Barry, bobbing my head up and down while working my tongue inside “shhhit” he groans, saliva begins dripping out the sides of my mouth
i go to work on his swollen cock, his moans encouraging me to get the job done “that’s it baby” he takes a sharp breath in
“get up and sit on him, facing me” Rafe commands from behind
i rise from the floor, turn around, push my panties to the floor and kick them off
i slowly seat myself on Barry’s length, i gasp taking all of him inside my cunt
his hands reaching in front of me to grab my breasts, he holds onto them and starts pumping into me from below
i try to hold myself up on the arms of the chair while i’m staring directly into Rafe’s lust filled eyes
“ohhmygod- yes- fuck me-” i moan in between breaths
“how does she feel?” Rafe growls not taking his eyes off of me “like a million bucks country club” Barry replies while slamming his hips into my ass repeatedly
“flip her onto the chair and fuck her brains out” Rafe instructs
Barry pulls me off his lap and flips me around, my chest pushed into the chair and my ass in the air he slams into me showing no mercy
i can’t control the sounds coming from my mouth, moaning, whimpering, and screaming at the way i’m being used
Barry pulls out of me and releases on my ass leaving my pussy dripping “you like that shit huh?” he says rubbing my slit from behind “taste her” Rafe says, Barry sticks his fingers in his mouth savoring the taste of me “just like candy” he tells Rafe
my torso still on the chair and my knees on the floor i lay there weak, trying to control my breathing
Barry gets dressed and pours himself a glass of liquor, sitting in the other chair
“c’mon we’re not done, get up” Rafe says, i try to stand but my legs are weak “i think you broke her” he laughs looking at Barry “sorry man, she’s got great pussy” he says
Rafe walks over to me and wraps his hand around my throat, lifting me to my feet, he sloppily kisses me and without warning plummets two fingers inside of me causing me to scream
“who’s pussy is this?” he asks pushing deeper inside of me, “it’s yours” i choke out, his hand still tight around my wind pipe,
“say it again” he growls
“it’s yours Rafe, i’m all yours” i plead
his hand slips into my hair and he guides me to the couch by my head using me like a rag doll
he throws me down on my stomach then pulls my hips into the air
“look at you, you’re a fuckin mess” he smacks my pussy causing me to cry out “you like that?” he smacks it again, i wince in a mixture of pain and pleasure
Rafe pulls me up by the back of my head “open your mouth” i open and he sticks his fingers inside, i suck his fingers just like i would suck his cock, Rafe loves having his fingers in my mouth “dirty fuckin slut” he says
he removes his fingers and forces them into my tender vagina, he works his hand slowly like he’s dissecting my insides, i move my hips back and forth trying to fuck his hand my pussy screaming to be pounded
“she just can’t get enough huh?” Barry says “i told you she was a good one” Rafe smiles
his slides his warm fingers out of me and spits on my cunt, i feel it drip down to my clit “please-“ i look back at him
Rafe pulls his shorts and boxers down exposing his delicious throbbing cock, he’s leaking precum
i brace myself
he taps the back of my pussy with his dick a few times before sliding it in, i feel myself become full of him “i gonna fuck you like i hate you” he whispers
guttural screams escape my lips as he sinks deeper into my swollen used hole, he feels so good
he pushes my face into the couch “shut the fuck up and take it”
i turn my head to the side to catch my breath and see Barry sipping on his liquor enjoying every moment, i hold eye contact with him while i cry out
Rafe picks up the pace, the sound of our skin smacking engulfs the entire room
it all becomes too much, the overstimulation is extreme, i reach back trying to push him away
“i ain’t done” he growls grabbing both my arms and pinning them behind my back “i’m gonna fuck MY pussy as long as i want”
i’m screaming at this point, i can feel him in my stomach, a new sensation arises in my pussy, stronger then an orgasm “Rafe i- i can’t-“ and then i feel a release and a gush of liquid between my legs
“squirting on me like a dirty whore” he smacks my ass hard, “i fucking love it”
“please- please-“ i sob begging him to stop, my body convulsing, eyes rolling in the back of my head
Rafe slams into once more before cumming inside me, he pulls out and places a gentle kiss on my ass
my body goes limp and i lay flat on the couch, he pulls my hips back up and holds them there, “stay up til you soak all of me in”
i lay there defeated, used, and bruised
Rafe wipes the sweat from his brows and puts his pants back on, he walks over to the table and pours himself another glass of whiskey, clinking cups with Barry
they sit across from my numb body and watch me recover
“you’re such a good girl” Rafe praises “you’re never getting rid of me”
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wildpeachfarm · 6 months ago
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This whole topic makes me think about how CCs communicate to each other, even outside of dteam. At least with the twitch crowd.
My theory is that people that come into this thinking there's a pre-established script on how a cc should be, and that everyone else already knows it? Coupled with how most of these newer CCs are in their teens, they would be self-conscious about not standing out "the wrong way", so they just act how they think they should act. Which makes them see any form of communication as confrontation or a attack, as it makes them feel like "well, it's either IM doing something wrong or YOUR doing something wrong if we have to talk about it."
They forget or never thought about that being a CCs is no different than being any other job or community, and forget to just be a human and communicate?
Not going to lie, that's how a LOT of people communicate especially on the internet. There is this unspoken assumption amongst people that everyone needs to act the same way and speak the same way, and that any diversion from that is "wrong" or "weird" because it either requires more communication, more boundary establishing, or more curation of your own personal experiences online (and people don't want to do that work). When in the real world, these are very simple things you encounter and are not a big deal at all.
Unfortunately, it is typically a lot of teen-age people who are like this because they haven't had the life experience that teaches you to "respect that everyone does not and will not want to act the same as you and you need to respect that, communicate, and move on healthily because that's part of being a functioning human in society". So unfortunately we do tend to find young adult and teenage CCs in this crowd too.
Which is why I always appreciate mature communication over senseless demands to act a certain way because that's just...not how the world works lmao- and I wish younger CCs didn't feel so much pressure to follow a certain type of "behavior" that is demanded of people that really have far less communication skills and maturity than they think.
Dteam are such a wonderfully unique case of boys who were raised basically on the internet and yet STILL have super healthy ways of communicating and expressing their thoughts and I think all these other CCs should take the hint and start working on their own flaws in behavior and communication because there is already a very jarring difference between how dteam handle sensitive situations vs how everyone else does.
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teddykaczynski · 2 months ago
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that sue donym article i read this morning is really sticking with me. the one comparing two different studies involving male children with gender dysphoria. and one is of boys who socially transitioned and those boys mostly grew up to be trans as adults, and the other group didnt socially transition and as adults came into themselves as gay/bi men. and sue's conclusion is more that... gender dysphoria/giid is a mental illness but that affirming and validating it from a medical perspective is perpetuating that mental illness especially since theres a lot of liteature showing that other path leads people to become adult homosexuals that arent lifelong medical patients. anyway. applying that to my own life.
well i socially transitioned at 13, right before i started high school. and from then i was very insistent that i was a boy and very sensitive when my family would call me she. my parents werent like.. validating right away to be clear. there was conflict about that. but my friends online and in person and the social scene was very much validating my GD, and said social scene encouraged me to think of myself as entirely different from other females. then i started hormones/blockers and my parents began to validate it even more.
what would the alternate path have looked like for me? it seems plausible that if no one around me took it seriously, that after several months-up to two years perhaps, i would have given up the ruse. and assumed a "same sex identification" as sue puts it. one of the things i was most scared about re my parents and detransition was how hard i had fought for this to happen to me. and it wasnt even that much later until i was saying actually this was the wrong idea. i felt like. i had to prove to them that i could stick it out. but im glad that my survival/self-preservation drive was stronger than the drive for my parents to not think im an idiot. once the idea was fully planted that i needed to get off T when i was 17 sprouted it was more important to me to stop than what they thought. anyway like, had none of that happened.... had it been like... i dont actually believe GD is why you attempted to kill yourself (it wasnt) so we wont move that much quicker on this. you know. i can see it. i dont really like hypotheticals. they just make me feel sadder about my situation or i try to imagine something even sadder and i shield my eyes i cant even look at her pain i dont want to think about a Me who got (blank) surgery or was hurt in lesbphobic ways im lucky enough not to have been i dont want. to think of her. but then shes thinking..... about how she wishes she was me. to her im doing so much better. and i am! i dont blame her for that. but i feel bad for not wanting to face her pain
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swiftfootedachilles · 10 months ago
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this has been sitting in my drafts for months but i still very much agree with it so its time to post it methinks:
to me, fanon mickey often being ooc (imo) is a result of people not understanding his trauma ......or the complexities of autistic people's emotions. yes im back on my autistic mickey soapbox. argue with the wall
mickey is very childlike as a result of trauma and autism imo and acts impulsively as a result. being childlike is not the same as being childish/petty! he is immature in some ways, but he very much processes his emotions in an adult way. and as someone who finds autistic!mickey soso important, i honestly find it offensive the way his complex character is often watered down to either a petty, homophobic "thug" only capable of feeling rage or lust and only good for breaking shit; or a stray puppy that follows ian around and sits around to wait for the plot to need him to advance ians story
hes sensitive, stubborn, courageous, messy, creative, brackish, socially awkward. hes great with money and sometimes has good business plans, but if those plans fall through he always has a backup. healing his inner child is something hes not too keen on, but i like to think he eventually gets to a point where he can let go and enjoy the small things in life. draw for fun, watch shitty movies and like them anyway, let his husband dote on him, try cooking because its something he never got to do as a kid, work on his reading skills even if hes embarrassed to admit struggling with bigger words. he can do all this and have meltdowns and stim and yell and break shit because sometimes he struggles with expressing himself with words! he can do that and still be a well-rounded member of society! he does their taxes, knows the difference between Roth and Traditional IRAs, watches franny at the park like a hawk when he babysits her, teaches carl how to make a real bloody mary, goes on dates with ian and kisses him in public, secretly feeds the neighborhood cats because they remind of the one that stuck around the milkovich house
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unheavenlybody · 1 month ago
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xxx whining abt my friend AGAIN
decided not to send a draft of a breakup text to my friend yet cuz i fear i am being too hasty and impulsive with this. but i rly don't know what to do... i feel very lost and i dont want to end a 8-9 year friendship over this. but we've already talked about it once a couple months ago and i dont rly feel like anything has changed. i am just worried that she is going to leave first and in my mind i'd rather rip the bandaid off myself and spare myself more prolonged pain lol.
i think the two of us have extremely different social needs and expectations/wants out of a "best" friendship and i'm not sure its something that can be reconciled?? like we may just be 2 fundamentally different ppl and aren't compatible anymore. i think it would be unfair of me to expect her to change, cuz she is a very introverted person that likes her alone time, or so she says. she also is busy with work, which i understand. she just seems completely chill/unbothered with only hanging out once every 2-3 months, sometimes longer, and virtually never talking via phone or text (cuz she doesn't respond when i reach out LOL). i want to be sensitive to her comfortability levels, her social battery, and take into account that there other ppl and things that she has going on in her life. like ik i'm not the center of the universe u know what i mean?... but it also sucks to miss my friend so so much and feel like im the only one that seems to mind our lack of contact, that when we eventually hang out months later she'll tell me about all these hangouts that she's been having with other people, and that it takes her several days or weeks to respond to a simple text and then she offers no explanation. i dont feel like i am asking for much, but yet i still feel guilty for even daring to feel unfulfilled by our friendship. i just want some kind of indication that she misses my presence, but in the past she's mentioned that she doesn't feel that way about anybody unless its romantic so lol i guess.
when i brought it up 2ish months ago she reassured me that she values our friendship and that this is just how she is, so i want to take her at her word but it feels like her words and actions aren't matching up... i really hate how this feels cuz my sadness feels so unjustified and selfish in my mind. it's not like we're in a relationship or anything so by her standards i shouldn't care this much... but damn is this just how best friendships are as an adult fr?? cuz this feels like i don't have a best friend at all most of the time. it feels so lonely that i just want to cry its pathetic lol. so much happens in the months we dont speak that it feels like i am not even a part of her life when i just want us to be closer. it's like we're slowly becoming strangers. i think i tend to center best friends in my life in a way that has never been reciprocated, that even when they say they consider me their best friend im always an afterthought lol. i just want to feel secure and appreciated in a friendship lol
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girlflowergirlflower · 9 months ago
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INTRODUCING... THE ONE N ONLY..! PUT UR HANDS TOGETHER 4.. *drum roll please*
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Meeee! Its me! :3 look here I am!
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i dont have locs anymore :'3 I actually belly flopped off a diving board SO HARD the little lockage i had came undone! Like the weezer song! >B] anywhoz
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WELCOME TO MY PAGE :3 HEREZ SUM INFOS ABT ME ^^;;
My interests!!! (^∧^)
I LUV SAPPHICS!!! AND QUEER.. ANYTHING! >///< im sapphos apprentice fr
my favorite shows r animes that will ruin ur life and childhood cartoons!! ^_^ like madoka magica, death note, erased, adventure time, my little pony friendship is magic, chowder, fish hooks etc etc! >;3
My favorite artists are hastune miku!!! And nicki minaj and System of a Down! :3 and tyler the creator and lemon demon and tally hall and jack stauber and spellcasting <3
I don't like labels :P)) I like writing scripts, songs, drawing and singing and theater and film - i don't have an act in specific. I just do what makes me happy
I draw and make comics and cartoons! I love art and animation so very much! My dream is to be a well-known cartoonist for many different projects ^_^ I adore indie animation, too!! Bugbo and the amazing digital circus and big top burger are my inspirations currently >:3c
My dni
Basic dni info don't be racist don't be a terf no pro contact/anti contact zoos or maps no mspec lesbians yadda yadda all the normal stuff and if u consider urself one of those "I hate everyone equally" centrist dickheads then gtfo my traphouse, disrespectfully <3
ALSO im very much cringe coded so if u embrace "cringe culture" or are against furrys or gacha kids or just people being themselves and being happy without hurting anyone (keyword: WITHOUT) you can also gtfo my traphouse NO BULLIES ALLOWED! /srs
Also, pro shipping is a sensitive subject for me. If your ships are harmful or downright disgusting, dni. I know it can be a coping skill for trauma, but my acc isn't the best place for that sorry bud :/
BYF!
Hey! Im a minor!! Im 16!! Keep that in mind if ur an nsfw acc or centered around adult topics!! <33
I go by fae/faer prns mostly!!! She/her is ok too but i prefer fae/faer!! ^_^ I have some xenos like doggie/doggiez as well!
I'm autistic!!! :3 self diagnosed for now trying to get a medical diagnosis soon! So tone tags are very much appreciated! /srs
I'm down with the sickness /ref
... by that I mean I got a lot going on in my life :p living situation and mental illnesses, I'll just be posting whenever I wanna, no strict schedule
I'm super silly and still figuring myself out! So come along with me like the adventure time song n Diddy and watch me grow thru my shenanigans on this totally valid real and not social simulation of an app/website >:D
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themoodyestj · 3 months ago
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hello "new person" assuming you aren't yet another sock account created by walker girl because she's bored and doesn't have any friends.
for someone who claims to have a brain, you sure bought a lot of the bs walker girl admittedly made up.
just open your eyes, if you really have a brain then use it and realize that hating on Jensen is a futile waste of time.
because he doesn't even know you exist, and everyone else is busy with their own lives.
there's no point to this, you can't help him, or hurt him, and even if you do this just for funsies, because you like to trigger people.
i guarantee, no one gets their day ruined over a stupid post on tumblr, i doubt anyone even thinks about it for more than 5 minutes tops.
so why don't you find something better to do with with your life?
i promise Jensen will be fine he's a grown adult, and he can solve his own problems just fine.
Oh my, my first hate mail. :D I was actually wondering why the AAs were so quiet while raging on in other platforms, and then I noticed my anon asks were off. They're bold with their words but not with their nicknames, am i right? But lets get to business, shall we? hello "new person" assuming you aren't yet another sock account created by walker girl because she's bored and doesn't have any friends. Oh, I take offense to that, delulu person. I am indeed a new person. Or... well, not that new, just started speaking up a bit more recently. I dont intend to prove anything to you, I dont give a rats ass about what you think, really, and im sure it would help your delusion to think that Im someone's double account, but I am not. Fairy Godmother turned me into a real girl, I swear. for someone who claims to have a brain, you sure bought a lot of the bs walker girl admittedly made up. Oh I do have a brain! It's not a claim, it's a fact! My mom got me tested! (Sorry, had to insert a Big Bang Theory joke here) And no, walkergirl is one of the people I read, but not the only one. Many many others share similar opinions, including people in your circle (except you club them to death like baby seals, you big bullies). Also, I have eyes. I can read. I can think. And if you dont mind me saying... dude, strong projection. Im not the one being fed up lies from the media despite a lot indicating the contrary. And I guess it's annoying to you that a lot of people start to to think the same... Fear us, because we are many. Muahahahahah (Not scared yet? Ah well.) just open your eyes, if you really have a brain then use it and realize that hating on Jensen is a futile waste of time. Ok. Read my characters. I DONT HATE JENSEN. I actually love him. And thats why i want to see him grow and be happy. I can love someone and have critical thinking. Imagine what would happen if you raised a child, which is the most love you can feel for someone, and only praise him? Youd get a Duhneel, and honey, no one wants that. One is enough, dear lord!
Besides, you don't get to tell me who I hate or not, delulu person, stop trying to force your opinion on me. Geez. because he doesn't even know you exist, and everyone else is busy with their own lives. Oh I saw that. I saw how people were getting busy with their lives, in fact, I was sent screenshot after screenshot of how people were busy living their lives. In fact, I know you didnt write this message, its your secretary, because youre busy with your life, right? You old geezers, stop trying to pull my leg like that! (LOL) It would be funny if it wasnt so tragic how one simple post from a small blog can rile you all up like that. But golly, am i happy you guys have a life to live! Go live it! there's no point to this, you can't help him, or hurt him, and even if you do this just for funsies, because you like to trigger people. Well, I do it to express my opinion, thats my point, and it so happens to trigger some very sensitive people. Although I dont go shove my truth in their faces, like you are, Im simply... expressing an opinion. Im sure the concept is familiar to you. But if I were trying to trigger anyone... You'd be playing right into my game, wouldnt you? Mindblowing, right? Maybe a teachable moment right there, just saying. i guarantee, no one gets their day ruined over a stupid post on tumblr, i doubt anyone even thinks about it for more than 5 minutes tops. Yeah, we've been over that. Im so happy my post didnt cause any imposition and people were able to live their merry lives without causing much of a fuss. And im grateful you gave me your five minutes of thinking about my post. Thank you for the attention. so why don't you find something better to do with with your life? Because... I dont want to and youre not the boss of me, neiner neiner? But hey, dont lose hope on me so fast, I do plenty of things! Do you want me to share some recipes of food I cooked for the first time this evening so you can use in your life when youre not thinking about me? I could share some! i promise Jensen will be fine he's a grown adult, and he can solve his own problems just fine. Oh, thank you for the reassurance, I was getting so worried about him! Im sure he is in great company, with you people salivating over him. He wont get dehydrated, thats for sure! Now on a more serious note... I really dont know what you expected with this message. To rile me up? To play with my insecurities? For idiotic messages, idiotic answers. You get it as you dish it. May this be a lesson. The thing is, as much as I love Jensen, I will never be so invested in him as you and your delulu friends are, because i keep a healthy mental stance when it comes to celebrities. So I would advise you to really follow your own advice and live your life, and live it well. Don't let my post ruin your day, its just words. And like you said, Jensen doesnt give a crap about any of us, so what would be the point, right? Tumblr is not my life, this is a place where i spend some time, but it doesnt really define me. If you check my blog... you wont find much there. Im not as proliferous as most bloggers, but hey, you sure gave me a run for my money this weekend! Ok, this was fun. See you never.
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feitansdollss · 2 years ago
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How the Adult Trio would react if they walked in on you masturbating 🖤
Disclaimer: Unlike my last post, this one is nsfw. So yes it is obv nsfw and read on your own will I gave you a disclaimer. I want to say that please if you are sensitive to these types of topics just basically scroll or something cause guess what Hisoka exists, I mean it isn’t that much nsfw but it still kind of is and i have to warn you lmao..anyways thats it and i hope you enjoy! <3
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Hisoka 🃏
• Alright, so Hisoka is a very special person. What I mean by this is that he loves teasing you (like tf you except). But hear me out he would def get turned on by this.. So firstly, he enters the room to get something and sees you. He will immediately start to tease you and ask to accompany you or something. Like for example “You know you could have called me” or like “So you’re in the mood huh?” so yea he would really tease you. Then if you would ask him to leave he would close the door and just save that moment inside his head. The guy would probably go somewhere private jerk off to the thought of that. After he sees you again he would obviously talk about it and just be annoying as hell about that specific moment..
Illumi 📍
• Im sorry to break it to you but Illumi would be SHOCKED. So lets say he enters the room and sees you. The man would probably do some gestures like for example smirk or narrow his eyes (maybe even spread his eyes open and just stare at you for seconds before leaving the room) So, he leaves the room thinking about it. And he would act like nothing happened but secretly he enjoyed you quietly calling his name and letting little moans out for him. He would just have normal convos with you after everything happens and just continue with life. (he will still remember that though) But yes he would defo be shocked cause that would be the first time him seeing you masturbating
Chrollo 🕷️
• Chrollo would def be a bit shocked. (let me explain) Let’s say he comes into your room and sees you masturbating at first, he would be a bit shocked. But he ain’t gonna complain cause hear me out. He would love seeing you say his name in this type of state and touch yourself. Chrollo would probably try to do it w/ you. Cause this got him turned on as fuck. But, if he didn’t do it with you he would probably just leave and try to lets say “study” you. He would be really curious of what turned you on in that moment for you to start doing it. And later on would definitely ask you something like “ Were you thinking about me?” and things like that etc.. He would probably be very clingy with you after that situation and let’s say just smirk at you whenever you pass by him.
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lacunasbalustrade · 5 months ago
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what are your general thoughts on queer(gay n trans n all) people? like you dont seem to be against gay ppl from what i can see but i also see that you've like never really openly said something pro or against trans ppl. sorry if its out of the blue im just curious esp seeing your pov as a religious person who has trans mutuals/follows n all bcuz i (unfortunately) know plenty of christians that know trans people but only tolerate them instead of accepting them (which usually means they misgender/deadname them)
hi! I'm happy to answer your question - it's a bit controversial, though, and a sensitive topic for everyone, so I do ask for your understanding if anything I say happens to offend you.
as a Christian, I believe in the stance the Bible puts forth: that BEING gay is not a life choice, it's an inclination that came forth due to the presence of sin in the world. the continuation, however, of this choice, is a sin.
To quote so no one thinks I'm speaking out of some random, bibically incorrect bigotry, Romans 1: 24 NIV "Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another." ,Romans 1: 26 "Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones." , Romans 1: 27 "In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error."
obviously my faith and beliefs should not be forced on unbelievers. I am not any holier than anyone else because I am straight. I am every bit as sinful because it's impossible to avoid committing sin.
so if I'm going to sum it up, it's best said as: none of my business because Who Am I to tell you how to live, right? you're my friends and 'preaching' isn't actually loving. the best form of loving others as a Christian is to accept them as a person before judging based on whatever life choices they've made or pronouns they call themselves. which brings me into the next part!
theologically, I have to admit I'M NOT VERY SURE about trans people. I genuinely cannot find many sources of literature on the topic. There are intersex people, there are people with gender dysphoria. The Bible doesn't talk much about those, enough to give any real objections anyway. To talk about my beliefs based off the context, if God made you as you are, you shouldn't be trying to change you...is the logic, but again, no reason to force biblical beliefs on unbelievers.
I do disapprove of the extent to which some trans people have taken this schtick. I've seen posts saying 'oh if kids can play soccer and do ballet which messes them up for life, they can also do trans surgeries!' I'm sorry. That just doesn't make sense. WHY would anyone want kids to have permission to do Very Risky Things when they are small enough to not know better or make informed choices? And I also know many posts say that 'common sense', kids aren't gonna do those things till they're old enough to feel like they need to do them....those posters need to remember the last time they regretted doing something as a child. Common sense can't be relied upon in my experience.
Plus, given the kidnapping laws in the U.S which basically allow children to be taken away from their parents if their parents disapprove...lol yeah now make a law where my child can be taken away from me if I'm not in the same fandom as them. It can be hurtful to receive dissent on your life choices, but that don't mean up and leaving is the solution, unless the living situation is physically dangerous in some way or you are an actual adult. Children are not trustworthy indicators of whether or not a parent is problematic. And I'm saying this having had problematic parents myself - sometimes we are part of the problem. And if it's difficult, you should still try not to give up on them.
This might be the most important part: I'm wondering whether the gender stereotypes placed on girls and boys are the markers trans people want to overcome. Because from what I've researched, there are two different camps. 1: people who admit that they are biologically whatever sex they were born, and just enjoy dressing like and passing for the other sex because it makes them more comfortable. 2: people who actually believe they are the other sex because they feel that way and they are only effectively realizing that change to their 'authentic' self by transitioning.
I don't believe in gender stereotyping. Like, girls wear skirts boys wear pants. Boys can't wear pink etc etc. So the concept of a trans woman thinking they are a woman because they enjoy the markers attached to being a woman, like, for example, having long hair and wearing skirts, makes me really uncomfortable. Because that's not the whole experience of being a woman. It's only a small part of it, and it's not universal at all. And while no one can claim that ALL woman have experienced a certain set of conditions that make them woman...the only standard for BEING a woman, in my book, is to be a biological one, because it's the only defining trait. When people think of girls, I don't want them to automatically think of girls with skirts and wearing pink. I want them to acknowledge that all girls are different, and the only thing that makes them girls is the gender marker, not their conformance to 'gender norms' that have arisen from societal conditioning.
The idea that someone's feelings can be 'authentically accurate' makes me feel even more....nah. Feelings are valid but if I trusted mine all the time, I'd definitely be all over the place.
To sum it up: no problems with the trans behavior because I'm not into forcing biblical perspectives on y'all. But I definitely have a problem with the idealogy and the legislature.
dead name, misgendering wise...I believe people should be called whatever they want to be called unless it makes the other person uncomfortable. In which case the other person should just stop interacting with them since they're so uncomfortable. (E.g you want me to call you Baby Chicken. For some reason I have a problem with it. Maybe I have a strong fear of chickens.)
Basically I respect your life choices. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk haha.
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fllowerlove · 1 year ago
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ermm first post ,, but i gen need sum advice for this !! i believe im physically disabled to some degree , and dont know for certain how long my pain / fatigue / balance issues have been present , but i know that my pain has been unmanageable for almost a yr 1/2 now , and ive been using my cane for a year .
my mother does not let me use my cane , but i have a folding hurrycane that i saved up for quite some time in order to get . i use my cane at school and when i hang out with friends , but not at the grocery store / other stores with my mom .
my mother does not believe in doctors , as her veteranship has given her a " new socks + ibuprofen " attitude . the adults in my life believe i am being dramatic , but not that im faking . so after countless months of begging and reminding , i finally have a physical appointment this monday ( dec 11 , 23 ) . my need for advice is how do i get a doctor to take me seriously ??
i havent been to the doctor since i was ten , and that was because it was required , as i had moved into a new school district . that was my last physical , and the first time i ever remember going to the doctor ( that is not the dentist , optometrist , or psychiatrist ) .
below is a descriptive explanation of my pain , fatigue , and balance issues and how they ' ve affected my life , just in case theyre needed .
my pain may have been present all my life , and due to familial issues , i cannot fully understand my genetic history .
anypoo ,,, my pain is most present in my major joints ( ankles , knees , hips , and shoulders ) , but is also present in minor joints ( fingers and toes ) , back , neck , and the base of my skull . these areas always in pain , and i always notice it . my most sensitive areas are my knees , hips , and traps ( neck / base of skull ) , and my legs start to hurt ( worse ) / feel unstable without support . i cannot shower because my knees will give out , and i have completely switched over from using the stairs to using the elevator because i have often fallen down them .
my fatigue sets in before school lets out ( around noon ) , and often keeps me from working , walking for long periods of time , eating , and other activites . often when i get home , i have no energy left for anything else . i just sit in bed and fall asleep at 8 . i am failing nearly all my classes because i have not had my vyvanse in 9 months , and my brainfog is intense .
i am very unsteady without support , causing me to rely on my cane more than i should , resulting in more shoulder pain from putting too much weight into it . i have looked into rollators and forearm crutches , but none of those can be used around my mother without reasonable diagnosis . at home , i use the furniture to support me , and often crawl up the stairs ( townhome problems . ) and if im not , i rely on the handrails to practically pull me up , resulting in ... MORE SHOULDER PAIN .
i just want this to end . i told myself id be mad at my mom if what i have is curable , but id be even more mad if its chronic . i used to be in marching band , and i was cut from marching due to my pain genuinely affecting how i marched . i love walking , i walk everywhere . i love so many things ive had to give up , and i fear the doctor will just tell me to exercise more instead of giving me concrete answers .
any and all help would be appreciated :-(
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