#im exausted

[elvictolol]

how i love them help

[sexy-stable-diffusion]

[houstonxbreed]

I seriously need a break from my own body 😩

[first-witch]

I don't want to go to sleep because going to sleep requires I confront how lonely I'm feeling right now, and I'm not sure if I can do that.

[h3llgurlie]

High-key wished I could just go out and date like a normal person but my fearful avoidant attachment issues are like “nah girl what if you get used after opening yourself up like that”

Fucking tired of it, I just wanna get my clit wet without the trauma nagging me

[writing-2-heal]

It's exhausting to feel everything twice .

No energy is left to consume some to be strong.

I need you to get back into my life

Who are you.

Do i know u yet?

Feels like I don't deserve anyone's love

But urs.

I don't wanna break any one's heart with my illed life .

But your's honey.

I 'll break it even thousands time cause I know u have the power to bare all,My pain ,madness , all the craze shits i own.

Ur not with me when I'm doing bad and taking worst dicision in my life .

But hope u will'be with me when I'm gona commit crime of my life .

As much as I want to share it with u .

U also wanted be the part of it .

[dolcevenus777]

floortime is a real therapy method. it’s for kids but still a therapy for us exhausted women

[myculinaryblogtx]

Day 1: The New Job

Hello readers, it has been an eventful week...

I'm sleep-deprived, and my body is sore, but I feel fulfilled.

For the last month, I have been working at a second job at a bakery/brunch spot downtown.

I initially applied for a baking position to gain experience before graduating. But they needed someone to help expedite and run food, which is no problem as I have been a food runner at a fine-dining steakhouse for the last two years. I thought it would be similar, but I was wrong.

In my first week, I had to learn how each dish on the menu was plated correctly. The kitchen is small, but it can make fantastic food. Thankfully, the menu was new, so everyone, including me, was learning how the dishes were supposed to look, and I caught on quickly. If anything can catch my attention, it's food. Learning about the different garnishes or sauces that went with each dish was stressful but informative.

For example, we are doing a Japanese Omurice with spam fried rice. This is a typical Japanese dish, but we add hollandaise on top, a citrusy, dark soy sauce on the side, and garnish with pork floss and seaweed. It is one of my favorite things on the menu!

I don't get to garnish the dishes often at the steakhouse as most of the kitchen does it behind the line. My main objective there is to put the food in the correct order before it goes out to the guests. The most I do is ask for compound butter and sauces or pour some ketchup for fries.

But at the bakery, I get to make the plates look beautiful, and knowing I was the one who did them drives me further to pursue my studies at school.

For my latest development at the Bakery, one of my managers called me when I was visiting some family and asked if I was still interested in working on the actual bakery side, as they needed some help.

Eagerly, I accepted. They asked about my school schedule and what day I would be available for training, and the only day I was available was Halloween. I knew it was going to be an early morning, so I planned to sleep in on Friday, but fate had other plans.

A few days later, on Sunday, they posted the schedule, and my heart sank.

I had to train 4am-7am on Wednesday and Thursday.

I am not a morning person, and my usual shifts start at 9am on Saturday and Sunday. This was going to pose a challenge for me.

But I knew what I was getting into, so I sucked it up and braced myself for the hectic week ahead. On Monday, when I drove home, I promised myself that on Tuesday night, I would go to bed and wake up at 2am, as I don't live close to the city and get there early to make a good impression.

Well, long story short, I failed.

Instead of waking up at 3:30am, I woke up at 7am!

Pissed, I got dressed and ran out the door, hoping I could get to the bakery and see if I could do anything, but my manager texted me about it, and. I explained what had happened, and he told me to not come in, but he would move that training shift to Friday... Great.So, no sleeping for me then. I drove back home and went to right back to sleep. Later in the day after talking to my mom, dad, and my boyfriend, I had a plan.

I would just stay up all night.

I am a night owl so it was not that hard. I played video games and chatted with friends, and then an hour before the shift, I washed my face, changed my clothes, and left the house at 3:30am.

After waiting for someone to open, I eventually began training! I was mainly taught how to fulfill the orders we had for someone who was going to pick them up at 6 a.m. I also learned how to finish off the baked goods, such as adding chives to the bagels, powdered sugar on Danishes, and how the fruit was to be cut and presented on the pastry.

Then, I learned how to prep the next order for the later shift to bake. I would Pull dough out from the freezer and set the number we needed aside to proof. On my first day after all of that, I helped make butter pats.

Essentially, we took parchment paper and folded it into a kind of envelope. Then we had huge blocks of butter, which I used and sliced lengthways. I aligned them in the folds of the parchment and closed it back up before pounding it with a rolling pin so it would come together for my trainer to make sheets of dough for croissants.

On the second day after doing the same thing but solo, I prepped out some cookies and brownies before I was let go and drove straight home to pass out before going to my other job at 3:30pm.

I know baking is a lot, and I know it will take me a lot of drive to work out the kinks in my plans, but I feel good about this.

Next week is not as hectic. I still have to get up early, but only at 9am on Thursday and 7am on Friday. Much better. They plan to train me in actual baking and proofing. At least, that's what the note said. I am going to go check on my chicken thawing in the kitchen and think of what I am going to eat, as all I had today was coffee, 2 pieces of bacon, and a bowl of buttered noodles. They are not the healthiest choices, but I'm a broke college student, and beggars can't be choosers.

Till next time, my friends! And if you want to stay notified, follow and tag yourself below, and I'll add you next time I post!

[yesninathings]

Pulling a 26H long study session for my 2 exams tomorrow

And it still doesnt feel enough 🤡

[dailylowqualitycats]

Day 80

Exhausted cat

His name is Joey

[sjt3000]

Some days I contain multitudes, today not so much.

[nvrth1nk]

me acting surprised when im exausted after days doing many things that would make me feel exausted

[irisesinthegarden]

I just want to close my eyes and skip to a moment in life I'm happy and peaceful. Is it too much to ask?

[hauxicrook]

tired.

[lillithi]

I need job and money, I'm tired of being broke af 😭

Ig wroneeczka

[meu-fragil-miocardio]

A mimir