#im down terribly bad
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deadass like je te jure que je veux etudier mais a chaque moment je ne pense qu'a max et je vais regarder des videos de lui et ahhhhhh
#maxallix#cloud nonsense#so fucking whipped#im down terribly bad#someone save me#actually like i know i dont hv a 'crush' in the romantic sense#which makes it worse#hate it here ugh
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12 year old tim realizing robin’s not coming back to gotham and deciding that it’s Batman’s fault so he has to ruin the little bit of sanity and peace of mind Bruce has managed (read: struggled) to keep in his grasp:
#tim drake#dick grayson#robin#dc robin#bruce wayne#batman#tim drake is a menace#tim drake was and still is a die hard Robin fan before anything else#so he 100% thinks Damian’s funny when he’s not the one being targeted#there’s mission reports with comments in the margin like ‘nice 👍🏾 do it again’ and ‘650000000/10 🎉’ and Bruce hates it sm#it starts with a mild explosion and psychological fuckery and ends with a prank war with city wide structural damage#Bruce sees Tim and Damian getting along and starts sobbing in the batcave#It was 12 year old Tim Drake and his 67 alt twitter accs against the world (Batman) when dick left#For the two years dick refused to stay in Gotham I promise you batman’s anonymous tip line was just 325 ruthless insults from tim everyday#Imagine bruce trying to figure out which of his rogues keeps photoshopping terrible .5s of Batman then mailing it to the gcpd#just to find out it’s some fucking middle schooler with a bowlcut from bristol#Tim drake is unhinged and petty#Like it gets so bad that gothamites (even the rogues) have picked a side in this mostly one sided beef between a middle schooler and batman#I want internet beef between a middle schooler and a 29 year old med school dropout bruce ‘I am the night’ wayne#Bruce is foaming at the mouth whenever someone opens Twitter next to him#and batman is breaking your clavicle if you mention twitter in his hearing range 😭#Batman showing up at Tim’s windowsill: take down all your accounts rn and im calling your parents 😡🦇#Tim pulling out a ouija board: let’s see if your parents answer before mine 🤨#I made yj on the sims so they could fight the jl and I was like middle school!tim drake w/ a twitter acc???
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i have been a ball of depression lately as well as my physical health worsening pretty severly this past week due to stress and so my friends have been. trying so hard to get me to get out and do things and its very sweet but i feel bad because the whole time i’m just a total mess
#they say they dont mind but i need to really. stop#im stuck.#and i know it’s hard on my friends to see me like this since i’ve been doing a lot better and now am back to my old habits#but i felt bad because they took me out shopping and to dinner tonight and i just had a headache and was limping and couldnt stop talking#about the recent death in my family and all the stress from classes and socially and how lost i feel#and i just wanted so bad to just. enjoy myself but i couldnt#but my friends know about how severe my depression is and are all very used to it#its in fact more normal than not. but i was really. feeling at my best for several months so the crash back down to not eating and sleeping#and being unable to fully tidy my room and all that stuff has been. difficult for me as well as those around me#it’s been normal for me for so long to live terribly that taking care of myself for a while and then losing the drive to has been. hard#im trying to get better but i slide back down#i need to work on my constant self loathing but i keep walking around just. conviced im such a burden and being sad makes it even worse#i just. am always overcompensating for my lack of#ability to love myself with just. constantly showering everyone around me with love and its. hard for me when i dont have the energy to do#even that anymore. its hard to let people take care of me when i just want to take care of them all the time
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Once I was scrolling thru naruto fics and saw the tag "buisnessman!Kakashi" and all I could think about was Kakashi being a child businessman, owning all the konoha adults at doing business while wearing an oversized suit and tie. That idea is so fucking funny to me.
#obito: that kakashi! hes always showing me up by getting better deals than me >:-(#also just the idea of lil child Kakashi showing up at a business meeting and sealing the deal with an outline written in adorablly childish#handwriting. written in crayon lol#call this the naruto businessman au#every ninja is a business person and it exactly parallels canon. that is my dream#sealed inside naruto is the partial spirit of the ultimate buisnessman but its too powerful and everyones afraid#fucking hashirama's face on the wall as the company founder lmao rip madara: fuck this company ur brother embarrassed my brother so bad#at deal making that he died. im gonna tear it all down. face me hashirama! deal for deal. ill become the ultimate businessman ill control#the world and put an end to all this business!#oh got its so weird like the founders waterpark au that i also keep deep in my heart#anyway this is weird wtf am i doing. procrastinating and its like almost 11 i should keep writing or go to sleep lol#but wait: 10 years ago the spirit of a ferral businessman was unleashed upon this building. there was no stopping him. his charisma was#unmatched. his expense reports! his terrible otherworldly expense reports! he was too efficient! he fired half the staff! the spirit of#that buisnessman is sealed inside of u naruto. thats why theyre so afraid of u. and then cut to naruto in an oversized buisness suit#looking shocked. aw iruka as a daycare working. cute#anyway this is fucking dystopian lol#unrelated#naruto ramblings
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can we please stop telling people to kill themselves and to rot in hell and that they deserve to be bullied and that they are inherently horrible people who deserve to die and get doxxed. please. can we please stop doing that.
#like#okay first of all. do you understand the gravity of what youre saying or are you just throwing words into sentences#second of all. that kind of language is so fucking harmful for people with ocd or just obsessions with morality#because i mean not to make this abt Me (though this is kind of a vent ) but when i see people saying that it just. Sends me into spirals#because if people can say that to other people then what if they say it to me because i secretly believe the same things (even if i don't#-most of the time!)#what if im an inherently horrible person deep down? am i going to rot in hell for feeling slightly bad for this person?#i cant imagine that others dont feel like this or something along those lines.#im so fucking sick of death threats they do nothing. they do fucking jackshit except make more people feel terrible.#if you send death threats to people or say shit like this im blocking you. i dont want you in my space#bee.txt#moral ocd#scrupulosity
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I can imagine anything guy image: “I can spiral into tears and convince myself I’m the worst person alive over anything”
#it’s soooooo easy#‘hey that thing you said was kind of insensitive’ -> feel awful and apologize immediately ->#try to explain that I’m a flawed human being in hopes that they don’t hate me as much -> realize I’m using it as an excuse -> feel worse ->#want to explain that I feel bad in hopes that it makes my apology sound genuine -> realize if I do I’m starting a pity party ->#Devil on my shoulder says that I SHOULD start a pity party bc then people have to console me even though I’m the one who fucked up ->#realize that if the devil on my shoulder thinks that that some part of me must think that. thinking that is kind of terrible ->#feel like I’m terrible -> start crying -> realize that crying will turn it into a pity party anyway ->#realize that I don’t want to feel like I’m terrible. that I do actually want people to console me -> realize I don’t deserve it ->#admit that I am truly horrible for trying to turn my fuck up into a way to make people comfort me ->#post about it on tumblr to vent (?) -> realize now I’m starting a pity party in front of almost 8k people ->#realize that makes me even worse. -> break down in tears feeling sorry for myself when. again. IM the one who fucked up#repeat at and slight inconvenience or mistake. feel like a piece of shit forever :)#it’s a flawless system. if someone sees me struggling and tries to console me I can redirect that to confirm that I’m a horrible person#try and tell myself that I’m spiraling bc of mental illness -> that’s an excuse ->#excuse = horrible person bc I’m not willing to own up to my mistakes -> return to spiral
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suicide cw
look i have been in this area before mentally. it sucks and i wouldn’t wish this on anyone. but, and this is going to sound callous, but i don’t feel any sympathy for james somerton. even if i hope he’s like. not dead. But thats all the amount of goodwill im willing to give him. The more i think about this really, the more angry i am.
ngl this entire situation is another example of how white people weaponize their mental illness to avoid consequences. Im seeing it in real time.
this man has a continuous habit of using self-harm as a get-out-of-jail-for-free card. in both of his apologies, he has worded his supposed attempts in ways that were clearly meant to guilt people who displayed his plagiarism and overall horrendous history of racism and misogyny. i say supposed because, while i’m not saying those are lies and this would he such a fucked up thing to lie about that i don’t want to think he has, unfortunately, it’s been proven again and again that his word can’t be trusted, as he’s known to lie to try get out of consequences. Hes a proven liar. him lying about this is actually the best case scenario, because no one should go through this entire situation, wouldnt wish this on anyone, but you can only do this so often before people stop sympathizing with you. is this callous? Yeah, but like. I’m actually fucking angry he cant straight up take no as an answer. that this is how he reacts realizing he cant be one of the Cool Kidz™️ on youtube anymore. he acts like he DESERVES a career, like its not a privilege hes lost due to his own actions.
He lied about apologizing and forgiving people, he lied about giving the money to hbomberguy to give to ppl he ripped off (yknow, instead of doing it himself), he lied about the jessie gender situation and rewrote the narrative to make it so he isnt the bad guy, and hes the victim all along actually!
you can’t tell me that supposed last message of his isn’t meant to be a 13 reasons why esq attempt to deflect the blame “look i’m going to kill myself and it’s all YOUR PEOPLES FAULT for not letting me achieve my DREAM of being filmmaker IN PEACE!!! I just wanted Nick’s (the guy who I have thrown under the bus again and again) portfolio up!! Im just being a good friend dont you all FEEL BAD” he refuses to take ANY ACCOUNTABILITY of any of his actions and he IS STILL trying to shove the blame over to other people again.
it’s also pretty ironic people are like “uhhh well hbomber’s fans harassed him!!!” like hbomber outright told people NOT to HARASS JAMES!!! ALSO acting as if james doesn’t have a very real documented history of STRAIGHT UP sending his fans to harass and threaten smaller creators, more notably women, trans, and bipoc creators. especially after he’s stolen typically very personal anecdotes so he could profit from them. so why can he do it but the second people are like “hey this guys an actual piece of shit.” and he can’t handle it suddenly people are trying to white knight his shit? like no he doesn’t get that. he doesn’t get that at all just because he couldn’t handle the consequences of his actions.
what? were supposed to stay quiet about a man profiting off of other minorities because he wanted to be the spokesman for all gay people? people tried to solve this on a smaller, more private scales for YEARS and he kept doing it. it was clear that the giant public video was the ONLY way to get people to notice. HE WOULDVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH STEALING 87 FUCKING THOUSANDS WORTH OF DOLLARS. HE CANT HANDLE THE FACT HE CANT GET AWAY WITH IT.
am i supposed to feel bad for the guy who basically threatened a trans woman with the police? i don’t care what anyone says, it’s so fucking obvious that he threatened jessie by implying he was getting the police involved in their conflict. what am i supposed to act like that didn’t happen? are we supposed to pretend like he didn’t glorify nazi’s and outright said that gay people made up a good chunk of the nazis? That he didnt say america joined ww2 bc they were jealous of the NAZIS. WHAT WOULD POSSESS YOU TO FUCKING SAY THAT. but then? He gives women (not even women most of the time, he misgenders nonbinary ppl constantly) shit for writing mlm. are we supposed to act like he doesn’t straight-up sees himself superior and better than people of color and steals their works to put himself on a pedestal? Are we supposed to act like he didnt spit on our elders by saying “only the boring gays survived aids” like man! Fuck you! He BLANTANTLY MAKES UP HISTORY TO PUT HIMSELF ON A PEDESTAL!! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO REWRITE LGBT HISTORY TO SUIT HIS FUCKED UP NARRATIVES!
yes this sucks ! no one deserves this but no one should be making him a martyr. Thats what he fucking WANTS! He wants to be immortalized as a victim!! (again, supposedly, it was reported hes alive but its not confirmed).
The shit he got isnt near the amount of fucking callous behavior hes done again and again. Again, to drill this point, EVEN IF HE DIDNT CALL THE POLICE HE THREATENED A TRANS WOMAN INTO THINKING HE DID!!! The fact he tried to use a head injury to justify years of the outright ghoulish shit fucking astounds me. Why the fuck did anyone in his life thought it was a good idea to let him TRY to come back. in the end, he had options. he didn’t need to try to make a comeback. HE DIDNT NEED TO FUCKING LIE OR IGNORE THE SHIT HE WAS CALLED OUT ON the reality is, he wanted to come back thinking he could shove it under the rug, was told that no dude, you’re not allowed to be a youtuber anymore. you’re done. you need to move on and went full nuclear. it’s not on anyone’s hands but his own. HES BEEN DOING THIS TO HIMSELF!! But nah man we cant call his shit out bc hell may or may not kill himself. Fuck the other minorities who have the same issues but worse and sometimes BECAUSE of him. This is going to SUCKKKK so bad when other ppl, specifically white gays, are going to weaponize this shit to get away with their stuff.
#warning: do not read this post if you want me to be nice to james somerton. i am extremely mean in this post.#before anyone accuses me of shit i legit never contacted him myself or anyone involved. i am someone who witnessed this behavior repeatedly#again. i hope hes alive and well. the fact is him lying about this WOULD BE THE IDEAL SITUATION. BC NO ONE SHOULD GO THROUGH THAT. but.#he HAS to forever be the victim in his eyes. attempting doesnt automatically mean youre free of sin.#its just terrible to see that regardless whether or not he did do it#its very clear his attempts to run away from his consequences are working on some people#we need to acknowledge that if your shitty ex friend can weaponize a threat to kill themselves#so can this internet person after being called out for horrendous shit#like what was the alterative? what were people supposed to fucking do? be nice about it?#yeah as if poc and trans women arent historically given shit for being 'too mean' about wanting justice.#this isnt just the plagiarism this is the fact a white dude has been parading himself as THE speaker for the gays(tm) but has been using hi#gayness to shield himself from his misogyny racism transphobia and antisemitism#its very clear regardless this means that ppl r going to side with him and then give him benefit of doubt#if you cant handle the heat stay out of the fucking kitchen dude. this is the consequences of your fucking actions.#hes a disgusting person who cant handle being told no so hes going to drag everyone down with him#like. idk this entire situation is frustrating to me.#its also frustrating ppl trying to be moral abt it like 'see! i knew this was bad all along!' no you didnt. shut it.#for the record im like mainly talking abt twit watching those spineless uwu cutesy ppl basically saying hes done noting wrong#oh and also alt righters who are clearly weaponinizing this where u know they wouldnt give a shit if a right ytber did this.#james somerton#idk might delete this later its just. ugh...
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PRESENTING: SECT LEADER JIANG CHENG MEIMEI
#jiang cheng#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#genderbend#jc meimei#im so down bad for her u have no idea#i hope everyones first impression abt my art#chibi or not#is that i am terribly down bad for sect leader jiang#canon jc
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my favourite part of hockey being back is that i get to caption this guy and so i bring you the "bad attitude" bit from last season finally being put to rest because we've beat this poor horse to death... only to be revived once more! if theres anything we like around these parts its living for the bit!
Training Camp 24 | 9.19.24 (x)(x)(x)(x)(x)
#paul maurice#sam reinhart#anton lundell#carter verhaeghe#florida panthers#2425#preseason#hockeys so back i get to clip paul again#you know how long it took me to hunt down the “bad attitude” clips#please dont ask#also there was definitely another one where paul rambles about reinos terrible attitude and then says he doesnt like animals#or something to that effect#i cant find it for the life of me lmao#anyways#happy reino extension hes free from paul slandering his character#im sorry swaggy youre gonna have to carry the cross from now on#also ekkys also up at the end of the season and considering how much delight paul takes in bullying him specifically#i genuinely cant WAIT till we get THAT#carter nothing but trouble since the day he walked in verhaeghe#the best part of the bad attitude bit is the way paul tries so hard not to smile afterwards and fails everytime
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#i wish for a day where my heart did not bleed from all the losses that come with serious chronic illness#i know i should be grateful for even being able to type today#to think today#to make choices good or bad today#but there's just so much mourning to do that never gets done and it just piles up and up#i wish i could have a thanksgiving#or a birthday#or a shabbat#but instead this weekend will be about maintaining consciousness to not wreck my sleep schedule#making sure i don't lay down more than 14 hours each day#and trying to remember that this boredom is s gift#bc when my cognitive dysfunction was super bad i couldn't even be this bored#or this sad tbh#i couldn't even be this sad bc I wasn't physically well enough to have emotions this intense#🎉#anyway this is so wildly inappropriate im so sorry its just so hard to hear how terrible i am for not handling my illness better#and i feel like such a failure but i don't know how to do better with the symptoms that im given#and i live in a society that is always going to try to make me feel bad for being this sick#so i know i should just do the best i can do and focus on not beating myself up#but its so hard#chronic illness is loneliness upon loneliness#the loneliness of being too sick to connect#the loneliness of everyone giving you advice that is the functional equivalent of 'run 10 miles a day instead of 20'#the loneliness of having experience no one else can relate to#the loneliness of having nothing to talk about bc you don't do anything#my heart is broken#and this is not an appropriate venue for it#but it's just so hard to smile all the time and try to be appropriate#i'll get it together#i'll learn my lessons and put my public face back on and go back to mourning in private I just need a second
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i was crying….. because….. i was making onion quiche
#i’m gonna explode#im gonna actually scream#what the fuck!#what the fuuuuuck#what the fuck#siffrin#poor siffrin#i#aaaaaaaaaa#stars above i feel so bad for them#someone give them a hug#the fucking panic attack#change what did the head housemaiden do#the change from dark out hat down to fake smile happy#gut punch#terrible horrible i hate it#it’s so fucking good#isat#the saffron
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I randomly get inspired to write weird stuff with Gabriel that I'm usually not even into and a lot of the time I get comments that amount to I'm not into this. Am I? or being surprised they were into it. Gabriel is just randomly inflicting this sort of thing on everyone I suppose
Gabriel Ultrakill has been reclassified as a gateway drug. Please keep an eye out for any suspicious activity.
#i can be your angle or yuor devil#metaphorical piece of ham/cheese that you wrap around a pill before feeding it to a dog#many things can be made palatable if you’re down bad enough#speaking from the heart#I would Not do that. oh but if he wants to it’s okay 🥰#I’m being so tame and normal please. you can’t do this. you can’t enable me#I have work tomorrow I need to. relax#trying and failing pathetically to keep this account somewhat tame#non voice post#ask#asks#ask spam continues.. the dashboard cries#looks around nervously#i am so very scared and terrible at speaking#but if you really want to send me insane things I do have a Different Account For That#you gotta message me for it#but. I mean if you do that just know. I can’t even form coherent sentences#what im trying to say is that I can’t hold a conversation for shit#but. you can always send.. gabe things..#ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ENOUGH. pack it up boys. im going to get shot if i continue
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so crazy that my life is so much better than when i was in high school
#clear skin and a glow up and i actually know what to do with my life and im not under the very unhelpful influence of my ‘teachers’#school wise mentally i was doing terrible back then but now im actually ENJOYING what i study#and i know how to calm myself down way better than i did#and yeah i have bad days. terrible days even but it’s okay <3#mehak.exe
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subtitles are so important cause how else am i meant to watch xmen during class what the fuck
#xmen#snap chats#PLEAAASSSSEE I WANNA KEEP WATCHING#WE DON'T EVEN DO ANYTHING IN THIS CLASS ALL THE NOTES ARE ONLINE AND HE ENDS IT EARLY ANYWAY#i MUST continue 92 ...... but my motivation to watch is so come-and-go its AWFUL#im terrible at watching shows i need to be in a mood for it yk like movies are easy you just sit down for like two hours#shows its like. MULTIPLE hours ok im sorry im bad at watching things#whatever i dont have anything for like two hours afterwards so maybe ill watch an ep or two while i eat lunch
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i might just lay down and die just found out my ra for this year is someone my roommate used to be friends with til she posted a jews r the new nazis "becoming what you once hated- ironic" on her story and a whole thing supporting oct 7. like not even a post just her own heartfelt thoughts about how awesome it was.
#i never even saw the post bc i had unfollowed her by that time#i heard abt it from this crazy zionist i know who said she posted hitler was right#& i knew they're a liar so i asked for screenshots & they kept avoiding me#so for literal months i was in this horrible limbo every time i saw this girl i was like she *could* be a literal nazi.#but she could also just be a regular terrible person who said something shitty but not THAT#& that was horrifying the one time i was alone in an elevator w her i was not managing#finally someone else showed me the screenshot so i know exactly what it said#which like. really isnt much better. but hey#anyways idk who to email abt this bc i cant be alone in a room w her#& i dont think anything ever happened i dont think anyone said anything to her. shes on the board of a club#with another insane girl btw but im not even gonna get into that.#oh and shes living two doors down from me#oy. i need new friends terribly#& my friends from my first month of college also have their best friend living on this floor i hope they never set foot in it tho#if i see theater kids on a bad day its over#sigh#delete later
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Pre-event:
"Ehh Wanderer is alright. Seems a lil too edgy for me..."
Event:
*gets established as a knight figure*
"Oh no-
I want him."
#genshin impact#scaramouche#wanderer#posting about this on the side bc it feels too down bad for main#siiigh outing rat's knight kink for the world to see#...is that why i main kaeya and noelle#HOLY SHIT GUYS#im terrible#atrocious even#pls put me down#its for the good of the fandom#Day 202(?) of hiding from my friends#summer scales and tales#i keep forgetting this one
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