#if i was writing for hazbin all these dudes would be in the show and this would explain why alastor is a cut above the rest

[aimasup]

throws up my hands in mock resignation but also a hint of frustration Okay Valentino is a cool villain I guess

He's like. Genuinely unsettling. Wish the show struck a better balance with his character sometimes (like sometimes when he's onscreen I have to skip over because I feel queasy and sometimes he's so unsubtle he feels more like a prop than a guy who's going to be a Huge Deal in s2)

[the-girl-who-didnt-smile]

THE LOA

These guys are my Hazbin Hotel OCs.

They are just the voodoo pantheon, and this is how I would implement them into the Hazbin Hotel universe.

PREFACE

In my humble opinion, Voodoo is one of the most misrepresented religions in all of popular media. Imagine if I described Christianity to you like so:

Religious figures like Jesus Christ, Saint Peter, and Mother Mary are just a bunch of nameless evil ghosts that the Christians worship.

The Christians worship a wicked, evil deity who flooded the entire planet and brought death everywhere.

Christians practice cannibalism. Every week, they eat the flesh of their god and drink his blood too.

This is, without exaggeration, how poorly voodoo has been portrayed in popular media. This goes back to the dark history of slavery in America. Voodoo is literally how the slaves preserved their African traditions, which is why it has been so thoroughly demonized, even to this day. It’s actually crazy how much they were able to preserve, when they were so aggressively persecuted.

Voodoo has one of the coolest pantheons of gods ever. If you like world religions, this is up there with Norse, Greek, and Hindu mythologies. This is like the coolest pantheon of gods that nobody has ever heard of. 

I just think it would be incredibly fucking lit if these guys were in Hazbin Hotel. They’re just a jazz band from New Orleans, and they are powerful beyond your wildest dreams. I don’t know if you could get away with putting these guys in the Amazon Prime TV Show, so I’m just going to insert them into my deranged fanfiction and make them extremely important characters. 

This is my fanfiction, and I can do whatever the fuck I want with it.

MY TAKE ON THE LOA IN HAZBIN HOTEL

The Loa are just the lower-case “gods” of Hazbin Hotel. The only thing more powerful than them is upper-case “God”. They’re all really fucking strong.

They were created by the God of the Hazbin Hotel universe, whom they all refer to as “Bondye”. They all look like humans because they were created to serve as intermediaries between upper case “God” and humanity. Even though they are super powerful, you don’t see a whole lot of them because they mostly interact with living humans on Earth. They are free to travel between Heaven, Hell, and Earth. They are neither angel nor demon. They cannot be categorized as Good or Evil. 

These guys are just absurdly powerful. I designed them to be as strong as I think gods would actually be.

The whole design premise here is, “What if the Voodoo pantheon was in Hazbin Hotel, and they were just jazz musicians with insane, bullshit anime superpowers?” I took several creative liberties with translating these real-life deities into completely overpowered anime characters because I just really want these guys to be completely fucking bullshit in a fight. They are so much more powerful than anything else that has been introduced in the canon of Hazbin Hotel.

My favorite one is the man center stage. I cannot wait to talk about him.

[valentinoappreciator]

i dont think i have been as unwell with any man (fictional or real) as i am about valentino. we have almost nothing about him, canonically speaking, and i already want to grovel at his feet, begging for scraps of his attention - just like he would want it

[theoddest1]

Hazbin Hotel episode 5 is a rushed mess.

May just make this a continual thing where I review the episodes from here on out.

-Right off the bat, the pacing for this episode is probably the worst out of all other episodes so far. Things just begin abruptly (Lucifer's first song with Al for instance), no build up, 5 months have passed in only 5 episodes of barely any progress or focus on Charlie as a character, a random character that didn't need to be introduced but was anyway ruined the flow further, and this stupid ass rivalry all on the basis of who's the "better dad" is legit the most random conflict of any conflict so far. That will get a point all on its own along with some of the other things mentioned. The pacing left no real breathing room aside from 2 moments: Al's rise to power and Husk n Al's convo. I wanna say the second song would be a 3rd but it just resolves an issue that was present for seemingly years and pulled a "Stolas" with having a song or sob story as an excuse for the lack of effort to reach out and be a better dad. Lazy writing and pacing overall.

-5 months....5 months have passed with barely anything revolving around helping sinners or trust built around the main cast SHOWN ON SCREEN. We are told important information opposed to witnessing the progress itself. This is not only lazy but extremely jarring cause it feels as though episodes were skipped and bonds feel unearned. They get easily resolved in what feels like seconds, and we're just supposed to....deal with it. Angel and Husk barely interact throughout this episode, which, after the crazy ride they had, with the knowledge of a SEVERAL MONTHS passing by as well, you'd think Angel would be shown to be more chatty with him....which he doesn't. Nothing crazy, just small bits of them interacting and enjoying each other's company. Nah. We get that next episode, and even THAT'S lacking. I'll tackle that in a separate post. But yeah, 5 months, and we have yet to see the other guests' views and how it has changed for the better or the process of them realizing WHY they would go for redemption. How that has affected them. Nothing of note has come about from any of these. No other sinners have joined. No other demons seem interested in Charlie's Hotel. Nothing. We are told things have been done, yet it feels like we are still at the starting line, or well, a foot away from it and miles away from the finish.

- Lucifer is a joke. I don't mind me a goofy threat, it adds a charm to them but also shows that they take so little seriously due to their immense power....not Lucifer. No, that guy just....is a joke. Dude is in his mansion making fucking toy ducks for some reason and just has depression (show said it outright, not even depression is spared from "tell don't show")

He does literally nothing, doesn't seem to WANT to do anything, and no one respects the guy. Nearly all in the Hotel lack fear, intimidation, or admiration for the guy (Pentious is the only one who seems to exhibit admiration of some kind). The closest we got is being uncomfortable. That's it. Then there's his scuffle with Alastor. Tell me why he feels the need to argue with this sucka again? Cause last I checked, Alastor is a mere overlord, and Lucifer is The Devil. Wtf is this randomass rivalry that just...S T A R T S? Why does Lucifer get intimidated or moved by Al? It makes no sense. Lucifer has been alive far longer than humanity itself, but nah this random fuck who looks like he robbed a blood bank got him weeping insecurities? I'm supposed to take this sad excuse of a character seriously? How many of these carbon copy characters will Viv make until I finally end my suffering???

-Wtf is Alastor's deal? Why is he so pressed and annoyed? One moment he is as cool and collected as a cucumber and showing only SLIGHT annoyance (Vox and His song), then he goes to meetings and speaks with people far older, far more experienced, and/or far stronger than he show no interest and he gets pissy? How insecure is he that people not caring where he's gone or thinking his ideas are wack is what leads to his eye twitching and him throwing a random ass cuss. Seriously, THAT'S what got him to swear? That his idea for the hotel's name is stupid? BFFR! You can not be serious right now, THAT'S what gets him going? You'd think with how witty and chill he was in the pilot, he would find a quick and a effective smart-ass comeback, not essentially bitch at The Devil. This makes Alastor look like a thin-skinned wannabe, too cause these minor ass comebacks are why he has lost his edge along with some randomass song number?? And at the end of the day, Al just couldn't be damned anymore to even care by the end of the episode, he doesn't speak with Lucifer or give any stank looks, doesn't speak with Charlie, does NOTHING pertaining to the issues prior, nah, he just stands there and watches after telling Mimzy to go away. Some say he did this to simply piss Lucifer off, but that doesn't make sense (not saying it ain't true, just saying if it is, it's nonsensical). First off, if that were the case, why was he annoyed even BEFORE seeing the guy?

If he only wanted to get a rise, why is HE getting angry? Trolls usually don't care enough to be this pissed. Second, wtf would he even gain from doing this? What to help push Lucifer to be a better father to Charlie, request by Lilith to Al so that Lucifer can get his act together?? If so, that's the LAZIEST shit I have ever heard. Lucifer is such a joke, he needed a SINNER to get him back on track....

Regardless, this whole father shit by Al comes out of nowhere and ruins the goddamn flow of the episode. Prior to it all, Al has shown NO interest in anyone and has done jack shit. Wtf does he even do? He's done ONE thing so far and that was help for the commercial. Alastor has shown to be completely useless as of now.

-Charlie, why is she treated as tho she isn't a grown ass woman? She's babied to hell and back and despite being the daughter of Lucifer, hasn't shown any of her abilities to help the hotel. So Lucifer can summon shit but not her? Is she that useless? Also, gotta love how she never asks her dad about the Valentino situation to help Angel out. Man...what a great ass friend. She also doesn't find it weird that Al is just suddenly...babying her? She has zero awareness of everything, I guess, which is getting annoying now. You're over 200 years of age (went to high school in the 1800s according to what her comic was about, but guess that's retconned based on what happens in the following episode).

So she doesn't use her abilities to tidy up the place, she doesn't act her damn age, she doesn't do anything to help her sexually assaulted friend. What a damn joke, just like her dad.

-Mimzy shouldn't have been in an episode about Lucifer. Plain and simple. Her character should have been introduced in one of the earlier episodes. Not during fucking this. And we got a repeat of the pilot with Alastor's backstory retold. So they're down to retell his rise to power but not to make at least a proper recap of the events that happened prior? Key word....PROPER.

-Husk caring about Mimzy bringing trouble is actually fucking stupid. Because of the lack of proper build up to him now finding more reason to like the Hotel, it feels forced that he would be worried about what danger Mimzy brought. And on top of that, yeah...ALASTOR IS RIGHT THERE. You know who else is there? LUCIFER. I get it, Lucifer stood by and watched as the Hotel was being swatted, but he also sang a song about providing what Charlie asked for, meaning if she had asked her dad, he woukd be down to help, so WHY TF IS HE WORRIED???? Also , is Charlie just INCAPABLE of fighting for herself?? "She doesn'twanna hurt sinners-" so she had no defensive abilities??? What???? Also, that's a damn lie, she fought Katie Killjoy on live Tv. Are no other damn people capable of protecting the Hotel??? Why did Al need to step in for that? They were just LOAN SHARKS.

Anyway, the scene where Husk is probing Alastor about Mimzy and treating him as a pet is decently paced and the tone was pretty neat, sucks that this feels like their way of showing that Husk is also under a leash like Angel rather than him being treated as a joke, which btw...horrid way to compare the two. Wanna know why? One is subjected to an onslaught of sexual assault whether he was pushing Val's buttons or not, and forced to be assaulted by various men around him, passed around like a thing. The other is Husk, who legit disrespected Alastor and had to push at him to get such humiliation and terror, and guess what....Al still ended up pushing Mimzy away after she did end up bringing trouble, so he did essentially listen to Husk in his own distant way. This is the ONLY TIME we see Al be downright mean to Husk and probably the only time. Angel has been subjected to nothing but horrid assault after assault no matter the situation. So I better not see anyone say, "SEE LOOK, THEY'RE BOTH ABUSED" stfu. Nothing about their situations are even remotely similar. Just cause the chains are the same doesn't mean the users are. EDIT: Ima say this before people act like I excuse this. No, I am not excusing Alastor's actions. I am pointing out what happened on screen. Husk mocked Alastor, Alastor retaliated out of anger(much like how Angel retaliated at Husk in ep 4 after Husk kept arguing and mocking him) by pulling out the chains to shut him up. He didn't even hit Husk. Again, I'm not excusing it, just pointing out how vastly different Husk and Angel's situations are and how one overlord reacts compared to the other....who is a straight-up rapist.

-Both the songs are mid/ok but pulled down by the awful storytelling....shame. I at first was not fond of Lucifer's voice.....it's ok now, I guess. Idk. I'm still not really feeling it, though.

Episode sucked ass

Pacing was all over the place

ALASTOR AND LUCIFER ARE PISS BABIES

[weebsinstash]

Hello! I don’t know if you do this but I was wondering what your thoughts were for a Yandere Lucifer Morningstar from Hazbin Hotel? I’m having trouble writing a good representation of him and would like some advice.

Honestly I'm gonna humble myself and say that it took reading someone else's post to make me like, REALLY notice the nuances of Lucifer's character

This post right here literally made me rewatch his scenes and go "oh wow he IS like DANGEROUSLY DEPRESSED"

He doesn't remember Charlie told him where she is, or what she's doing, and he can barely follow a conversation despite clearly trying to pay attention. He also just seems kind of scattered, and um, HE LITERALLY MAKES A JOKE ABOUT DYING FROM FALLING OFF THE HOTEL BALCONY like dude is making jokes about death in front of his fucking daughter, like my dudes, I think this guy is BARELY holding himself together

He clearly loves loves LOVES Charlie but he doesn't really know how to properly articulate himself and I have a feeling there's a lot he's concealing from her, and another big question is, is his depression from being cast out of Heaven, or from something to do with his missing wife, or a combination of both? Either way this man is clearly dealing with like, really bad issues. And Charlie also mentioned he wasn't around a whole lot when she was younger, so... did he have depression back then too?

So, that all said, I feel like a yandere Lucifer would almost be, potentially invigorated by his darling? Given a new lease on life? He may not be 100% his old self again but, you get him to like, 65, maybe 70% on a good day. You give him another reason to get out of bed in the morning, or afternoon, or evening or, whenever he can drag his depressed ass out of bed

Given what we currently know, I feel like a romantic yandere Lucifer would pretend to only be platonic and do his best to poorly conceal his feelings because of his whole... "can't ask his missing wife if it's ok for you to be their third" ordeal, the man still wears his wedding ring, and a platonic yandere Lucifer basically adopts you like another kid, because uh, I mean for one he apparently canonically missed a lot of Charlie's childhood, and he's also an ancient fallen angel, so he's got that age advantage on you no matter how old you are. I mean what are a few decades when he's literally thousands upon thousands upon thousands--you get the idea

Yandere Lucifer would want to stay close to you, helping watch over you, maaaaaybe being overly paranoid about you randomly disappearing and going missing For Very Obvious Reasons, and in the process he winds up being unintentionally overbearing. I mean, he did it in irritation, but he basically showed up at Charlie's hotel immediately saying it was a dump and all of HER FRIENDS were 'a bunch of losers'. He never completely pulls his punches when there's something he's displeased with, even if it has something to do with someone he loves, so his darling would get much of the same treatment. "Ohhhhh, you uh, you wanted to move across the city? That's, um, definitely a fun idea! BuuuuuUuuut, what IF, instead of doing that--", like, he tries to playfully tug you in 'the right direction' until you make him put his foot down

Hmmm... what would him losing his cool look like... well, we've already seen that he doesn't mind throwing hands and WILL KILL, but will stop if he's asked to or there's a good reason. With you, though, you're not typically going to be there to stop him from offing any rivals or bad influences, so I imagine he'd be kinda casual about it, actually! He already thinks pretty lowly of Sinners, so say he finds out you've been ditching him and Charlie to go out drinking with strangers, making new friends, maybe having a few one night stands? Yeah, some of those people definitely aren't calling you back, and Lucifer doesn't really see a problem with it. These people are kind of the worst and really don't deserve you, anyways! If anything he's helping clean up Hell for you and his daughter and keeping you safe :)

Losing his cool with YOU... I think would involve him using his powers to finally confine you, maybe even going demon mode to intimidate you into submission in a very dad-esque "now you listen HERE" kind of way. We don't really know the scope and scale of his powers but I can picture him at least being, obviously much stronger than he looks, and transforming to fly you "back home" where he puts you in your room where no one can reach you without his explicit permission (and you also can't leave~)

One second you're just drunk and jokingly defying him, teasing him, maybe even picking him up and swinging him around because you're bigger than him, to you he's just a silly little guy! Meanwhile this Grown Ass Man Who Is Also The Actual Devil is getting more than just a little frustrated you basically view him as a wacky little cartoon more than a grown man, one who has had sex and has had two wives and sired a child. You're just teasing him and stumbling around drunk when he's trying to get you to your hotel room to get to bed to sleep, like you're clearly not taking him seriously, maybe even playfully putting your hands on him (TOTALLY not riling him up in 'fun' ways) and he finally just huffs and snaps his fingers and, you're suddenly magic'd to bed! You're laying there blinking confused and he's tucking you in and chuckling that "you're such a handful!" before leaving you to sleep and somehow INSTANTLY knowing when you're up.

You ARE in his house, after all...

Not to be gross but uh..... I'm not saying "yandere Lucifer who has the power to still get a Sinner pregnant if he wanted to and you wind up fooling around with him and you're waking up with his little apple symbol on your lower tummy as one of those like hentai womb tattoos to show you're pregnant" but uhhhhhhhhhhyeah that's what I'm saying, and whether it was accidentally or intentionally, he's keeping it, and thus, keeping YOU

I just feel like he'd be very goofy and awkward and bad at hiding his feelings and being very clearly overprotective and jealous in ways everyone else but you manages to pick up on (god Alastor would have some MATERIAL) and, in a romantic/sexual setting he eventually just loses his patience with you not seeing him as a man and just gets... progressively more forward. You pop back into the Hotel after a night out and Lucifer's already hammered at the bar with Husk, stumbling up to you, hanging off of you, slurring and embarrassing himself, "You'reeeee SO pretty... like SO pretty.... do you wanna have *BELCH* you wanna fuck? Cause I LOVE to fuck, like when I FUCKED my wife to make my DAUGHTER, my wife and daughter that I have, 'cuz im a DAD, 'cuz I'm a MAN!" and you're just giggling and ruffling his hair, "You're so weird, dude ^^" and walking away while Lucifer internally screams, wondering just how DIRECT with you he's going to have to be

meanwhile Charlie is totally cool with all of this and sees this as a weird double whammy of Curing Dad's Depression + new family member and friend hurray! and she's totally actively either shipping you with her dad or aiding and abetting him in his weird attempts to absorb you into the Morningstar family

[luciferanalyzestar]

Alastor will never be my favorite but I saw his charm in the pilot. In the show I didn't expect them to stoop down this low at writing Alastor. Season 2 probably going to be worse. I believe there are many ways to make a well written female driven show rather than destroying characters around the main female characters.

Alastor’s appeal is not for me either. Characters who have the quirk that they are all powerful they and they have a mysterious backstory is lame to me sometimes. Official series Al is bargain bin Shadow the hedgehog to me. A butter knife has more edge than Al.

I understand why he became popular during the pilot era. Pilot Al has fun chaotic but sinister energy to him. I really like his line at the 2:20 mark. The line delivery is fantastic too.

If he was still like this in the show, I would be a fan of him. In the show he is just jingling keys for the audience. Dude just bitches around and beefing with a walking TV and a weird looking ass muppet. The only time he did something “helpful” was telling Charlie how to kill the angels.

Anyway, Hazbin being “female driven” is nonsense. I believe there is a tweet where Viv clarified that she meant “female driven” as she is a woman is the head writer. I wish I can find the screenshot of it but searching up screenshots is a pain and her Twitter is locked so I cannot search up via the search feature.

It is lazy to have male characters look weak to make the female characters look more better. It gives me vibes of the character Chris Hemsworth plays in Ghostbusters 2016 where his character is dumb compare to the woman. I want the Hellaverse to give us badass woman who is evil and her motivations does not revolves around a man. Give us a pure evil woman or a fun and sadistic villain like Lord Dominator Viv, please.

[wishful-thinking64]

One Hell of a Popular Opinion #01 & HH Rewrite Related Post #05

Season #02 of Hazbin Hotel is easily going to be worse than Season #01 and I don't mean, "it's going to be really mid," no, I mean, "Oh dear Lord, it's so fucked to the point where not even starting from scratch will/should be able to save Hazbin Hotel." ___________ So I'm going to preface this by saying, if you somehow haven't seen or heard of Hazbin Hotel's 2nd season being posted online then I implore you to see some of it for yourself because as much as I'd like to explain all of it myself, there is WAY too much shit to unpack and Tumblr only allows for me to write so much. This time around I titled it One Hell of a Popular Opinion because this actually seems to be what's broken the camels back for some hopeful fans of the show and I can't blame them because the writing just keeps getting so much worse. Like, they went from making Lute a comedic relief one note bad guy in Season #01 to being the ONLY DECENT/GOOD WRITTEN CHARACTER IN THE SHOW COME SEASON #02! Which is ironic on so many levels cause I can feel it in my bones that, in Viv's eyes, Lute is/was not meant to be seen as a like-able character but if she's genuinely going to be the only well written character come the second season, well no shit I'm going to like her.

I'm not even joking when I say that's probably the only net positive from all of this as the rest of the leaks range from, "okay that's just mid," to, "Dude, what the actual fuck?! Who thought this would be acceptable to make?!" Now, as for the reason I titled this as a Hazbin Hotel rewrite related post is because with everything I've seen, I don't know if I want to continue working on my HH rewrite going forward. The entire reason why I started working on this rewrite wasn't to prove a point to the Stans, I started rewriting Hazbin Hotel because I still saw potential in it. I'm being dead serious when I say, I see very little potential in Hazbin Hotel after seeing the leaks. And that sucks since I started out as a fan. Hell, the entire reason I stayed invested in Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss was due to still being a fan (albeit a more critical fan as I refuse to ignore all the bad shit that Viv and her team have done along with ignore the major writing flaws in both shows) but now, I don't really know what to think about Hazbin Hotel other than disappointment and disgust for the direction its going in. Whereas, HB isn't unsalvageable but it'd take a lot of work to make HB good and knowing that the two fandoms take place in the same universe is what ultimately ruins everything.

All of this to say that, I likely won't make anymore rewrite content myself for Hazbin Hotel or Helluva Boss going forward as this proves to me it's just not worth it anymore. Though, don't worry, I'm not discouraged from making rewrites or canon divergence AU's for other fandoms and I'll definitely keep criticizing HH and HB cause the writings only gonna get worse from here folks!

[bellagrimfox]

Happy Spooky Month!! (Oh and a rant too)

Welp. Guess the millie sui**** discourse will never happen. Then again, the fact that the leaks confirmed she actually wanted to go down that route is extremely distasteful.

That being said, aside from a few annoying scenes, this felt like a return to form to the show I enjoyed watching back in season one. Though now thanks to the permanent plot shift that is the Stoliz x Blitz drama (which isn't even a healthy relationship both outside and inside the show), it's hard for me to fully get back into. Love the animation still and even though Ronaldo isn't entirely the same dude in the leaks, he pretty much stole the show.

Though I do wanna say he looks too much like Dwight Schrute and Gyro Gearloose (2017).

World-Building, what's that?

I also wanna say how much this show's worldbuilding is so bleh. I mean it in a way that in the show, it's portrayed as not so different from the human world which is supposed to be the point of hell. Even how they die are too similar and this is the show that's connected with Hazbin Hotel that said that Demons can only be killed by angelic weapons. I'd rewrite it like this:

Demon culture is very sex/violence positive depending on which level of hell you're on. Wrath is an easy example where it's common for demons to hurt and fight each other, not to kill each other (unless they got their hands on an angelic item), but as a way of communication.

Potential Fanfic Idea?

But to get back on topic, as much as I am happy that the leaked scenes never got to be used, I still feel annoyed and disappointed that Viv would want that in her show. Although, this and the leaks did inspire me to maybe write a version of ghostf**kers but in a different world with different characters.....

I cannot wait for both fandoms to tear me alive for this.

Updates

Finally, updates on my personal life and my current progress on Pizza Cakes: The Rebake. (Punny :3)

I got a job now along with my usual college stuff! It's actually pretty good and I get to work from home. Though this does mean my activity on here and my projects will be limited. I still plan to finish this fanfic by the end of this year.

So with all that done, have a happy spooky month!!

[mixterglacia]

THIS IS THE PART WHERE LOGAN BITCHES ABOUT CARTOONS

WARNING: VIVZIEPOP CRITICAL, STOLITZ CRITICAL

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. I don't like this show, and I don't pretend to. Full transparency, I'm meaner in this then any before now. This is also slightly more disjointed than normal because I was directly reacting to the episode it's self.

"I swore I wouldn't dwell on the divorce." MAYBE WE SHOULDN'T BE RUSHING THESE THINGS BECAUSE IT FEELS LIKE HE'S WAITED TWO DAYS. EVEN IF IT'S BEEN MONTHS IT DOESN'T FEEL LIKE IT.

"I'll hear him and not the voice that says I'm not enough" Oh boo hoo bitch. You've seriously done nothing to convince me to feel bad for this stupid fucking asshole. His writing is full of holes and contradictions. It makes him feel like two different people.

"I'll set us free!" Are you quite sure that means what you think it means you stupid fucking ass.

Framed adoption certificate is a nice touch. Very cute.

Blitz is immediately not coming off how they want. I think they're -trying- to imply he has some deeply buried feelings too, but it comes off as "i didn't want this and i still don't want this, why can't it just be normal hookup shit."

"I'll die alone if this goes wrong!!" You have the emotional depth of a teaspoon and are about as interesting as one. Boo fucking hoo. BAD.

NGL this really made their wealth difference hit home. Why the flying fuck is blitz still bordering on abject poverty dude? You should be able to help him advertise send something IDK man, if you really gave a shit, why aren't you trying to actually help him in a genuine way? I'm sure he wouldn't say no if you slipped a hundred bucks or so into the book every so often. I fucking hate it here.

"Would he want me if he was free?" No. Next question. (You've done very little if anything to prove Blitz actually wants strings attached in this.)

"If he's only here as a prisoner what kind of monster does that make me?" Little late to have this realization but I'll take it. Also can we seriously stop downplaying how awful this is for BLITZ to go through? Stolas is severely over represented in Blitz's own fucking show. Why is Blitz so underdeveloped??? Why, dude? The episodes that mainly focus on him are pretty okay, but once Stolas shows up it's all fucking stupid.

If Blitz rejects him (which he should. Look how fucking anxious he is just THINKING about this.) he could lose his entire way of life. No more apartment, probably gonna get Loona taken away. Probably has to resort to prostitution or return to clowning. Stolas just gets to go about his life of luxury.

Why is Blitz's emotional well being such an after thought in this duet? THIS IS NOT STOLAS' SHOW.

"He showed me that I could choose" ...Dude. You have given no weight to swing that line at us. This isn't much of a choice in the grand scheme of things. Stolas and Stella already had the kid. The marriage never had to last. Not from the impression you've given us. He's a toddler deciding he wants chocolate milk instead of regular. We have never been shown he's actually going to lose anything of real value. He's still a prince. He's still got his money. Like are they trying to have him killed, sure but lets be real he's A PRINCE OF HELL. Assassination attempts are like...Tuesday for him.

GOD THIS SONG IS ASS. I will not allow Blitz to be painted as the bad guy here. Fuck Stolas, and fuck the team for trying to make it seem like we should feel bad for him. They both suck. BUT STOLAS IS OBJECTIVELY IN THE WRONG.

Ah yes, The Helluverse special of "let's yeet a stupid ass joke in the middle of plot, completely derailing anything." it has only been a few seconds and it's already going on for too long. Go learn from Bojack or RvB.

...........This cherub bit is throwing your entire lore off. If these idiots are having to do this shit to get by, why are they acting like heaven bound can do whatever they want in Hazbin? If all you meant by that line is the human souls in heaven, you totally screwed up the message there. Your points are murky at best, and you're contradicting yourself at every turn.

...............Are the cherubs mortal now? Like they're flying and glowing but they have to eat???? Huh? I don't think I've ever realized you're showing they eat a lot, but surely you don't actually have to eat as an angel or demon? Surely it's just a choice???? That's genuinely so fucking stupid???? WHY IS THAT EVEN A THING?

WE DON'T NEED FIVE ANTAGONISTS IN A CHARACTER DRIVEN EPISODE YOU FUCKING IDIOT. YOU ARE LITERALLY RUINING YOUR MAIN PUNCH. YOU ARE TAKING AWAY TIME THAT SHOULD BE USED TO ACTUALLY PROVE BLITZ HAS SOME KIND OF FEELINGS FOR STOLAS. BAD.

Honestly the stuff with these five would have been a fun standalone minisode. NOT IN THE MIDDLE OF ONE OF YOUR SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT EPISODES.

Bloody alleyway was a phenomenal cutaway gag. Points.

You really are not making it sound like Blitz likes this at ALL.

"If someone wants to see you less and less? Big red flag." NOT IN A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP, DUH. He's literally a prince of hell in an affair with a """childhood friend""" who was literally PURCHASED for him. The whole thing is a red flag. Not just this!

You are making it exceedingly clear Blitz's just in it because he think's he'll lose the book. I don't give a rats ass about what micro-development you're going for. You take away time needed for showing that Blitz is conflicted on more than one level to do stupid ass tertiary character shit. YOUR CAST IS OVER BLOATED. BAD.

If you wanted me to feel bad for Stolas, maybe don't show that Blitz has an Angel-esque box of sex toys because he thinks he has to impress him. Stolas should have made it very clear AGES ago that he just wants Blitz. If Blitz is this hung up on needing to impress the damned bird, something very VERY wrong is happening in the bedroom.

If you seriously want us to think Blitz has feelings/cares about Stolas (Not that he HAS to), this sex candle shop would have been a perfect place to do it. "Well, he really likes it when I do this-" "This is his favorite colour." "This is his favorite scent." Blitz clearly knows nothing about Stolas, and both of them are to blame. This relationship is never EVER going to work if they know this little about each other when they've been regularly boning for ages. He should know more about what he likes. "What's the mood!?" "I don't know!" Woof. Full stop. This is never going to work in a real scenario. Womp Womp Move on.

HOW DOES BLITZ NOT KNOW HIS MEASUREMENTS. HOW CAN HE NOT JUST HELL-GOOGLE HIS MEASUREMENTS. STOLAS IS A PUBLIC FIGURE IT WOULD BE KNOWN. HE DOESN'T CARE, ERGO WE DON'T CARE. BAD.

Like he seems to MILDLY know what Stolas likes but this should be WAY clearer. Especially if you want us to think Blitz secretly cares too.

Love Fizz's new outfit. Very cute.

Gonna be real, Fizz and Blitz are seriously adorable. Can Ozzie pick him up too and actually show Blitz what being sexually valued is like? Because clearly he pulled it off with Fizz. Because he clearly enjoys sex and it feels like Stolas is just...using him. Not enjoying him. It's gross and SHOULD feel gross, because it FUCKING IS.

This whole bit with the cherubs makes it feel like we aren't supposed to give a damn about the main plot. That it's just a silly background to TERTIARY CHARACTER NONSENSE. BAD.

So far this confrontation is good as far as the pit of dread it opened in my stomach. I still really don't feel bad for Stolas. I feel bad for blitz. Him begging tore my soul out. It's so obvious how bad this power imbalance has gotten. I refuse to entertain these two any longer. This show needs to GROW UP and get over them, leave it here and I will forgive it.

Stolas should have 100% consulted Blitz before OFFICIALLY PUTTING HIM UNDER OZZIE'S JURISDICTION THAT'S NOT OKAY. Even if he leaves him alone, that can absolutely be weaponized.

"Am I not fucking you good enough?" Doesn't come off as him wanting more. Blitz feels like he's waiting for the other shoe to drop. For the love of the gods stop stringing this POORLY WRITTEN. BADLY RETCONNED. PATHETIC ATTEMPT AT A WELL DONE TOXIC RELATIONSHIP ALONG. BAD. MOVE. THE FUCK. ON.

"I care very deeply and have for a long time" You sure as shit never showed it.

To Those in The Back. ONE GRAND GESTURE DOES NOT FIX A TERRIBLE RELATIONSHIP. This is Mr. Peanutbutter with the library thing. This is Not ROMANTIC. This IS EMBARRASSING.

If he really cared, Blitz would not be living in poverty. If he really cared, he'd make an effort to engage beyond sex. IF HE REALLY CARED HE WOULD HAVE DIVORCED HIS WIFE THE PROPER WAY AND NOT TRAUMATIZED HIS FUCKING DAUGHTER OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

Stolas is a godsawful woobified piece of shit that doesn't have the decency to acknowledge he's the problem, and when he does, has the fucking AUDACITY to behave like a pathetic child. This I was wrong speech is DOGSHIT and has no punch to it because more than half of the episode was TERTIARY CHARACTER BULLSHIT.

Blitz has EVERY RIGHT to see this as a joke. I immediately burst out laughing because YEAH. WHEN HAVE YOU GIVEN HIM ANY IMPRESSION YOU CARED BEYOND GETTING YOUR FREAK ON?

"Thank you for being here for a little while." Oh boo fucking hoo. Get over yourself. "It's just about sex" BECAUSE YOU NEVER MADE IT ANYTHING ELSE YOU FUCKING BOZO.

I am immediately cheering Blitz on in his retort. He's fucking earned it. You're not going to make me feel bad by making them show up in the room from their childhood. Blitz is completely in the right here.

If Stolas really thought so highly of him, he'd be putting in more of an effort. Stolas treats Blitz the way he treats Octavia. Like they're dolls from his childhood. If he wanted to do right by them, he would. He is FUCKING ROYALTY. There is NO reason he can't put in more effort for the people he supposedly loves. You don't love them. You love the idea of them. You can't accept that they aren't the idea in your head. This isn't love. It's abuse.

Fuck you. Blitz has NOTHING to apologize for.

It's like Stolas doesn't seem to think he's the problem. No shit, of course Blitz isn't going to react the way you thought he would. Why are you just THROWING HIM OUT RATHER THAN TALKING TO HIM? BECAUSE YOU DON'T WANT TO ACTUALLY WORK FOR YOUR RELATIONSHIPS YOU STUPID ASS OWL. YOU WANT EVERYTHING TO BE HANDED TO YOU ON A PLATE YOU RICH DUMBASS.

Fuck everyone trying to paint Blitz as the bad guy.

FUCK. YOU.

He's just trying to survive! He has a fucking daughter! A found family! EVERYTHING to lose!

Stolas just gets his fucking feelings hurt. He is the architect of his own undoing. Suck my entire ass. This was easily the worst episode bar none.

The tone was ALL OVER the place, and not in an effective way. The plot moved at a halt and go pace and all the fun bits were BOGGED DOWN by the supposed point of the episode! You can't tell me this shit took all that time, unless you were constantly saying "OOOO YOU KNOW WHAT'D BE COOL/FUNNY?" and shooting your production scheduled in the foot!

The rest of the portraiture being covered up is a very nice touch.

I can't believe you've gotten me to defend BLITZO of all people. But here we are. I guess I'm on his team. (He's an abusive dick, but NO ONE deserves this.)

[luffyvace]

Have you heard of “Carmilla Carmine” the weapons dealer from the Amazon series “Hazbin Hotel” I have a cute idea about what if Mr. Compress was dating Carmilla Carmine? And one day after that whole “Overhaul incident” and the LOV had to regroup Compress called her after the incident, and what all happened an hour later after they regroup, Carmilla sent out her daughters Clara and Odette showed up With the prosthetic arm for Compress (and cue the rest of the LOV meeting his girlfriend’s daughters😅) Shigaraki ask him who they were so He introduces them as ‘his girlfriend’s daughters’

And the girls explained that Carmilla and them were worried and that they want to help them take down overhaul for all the shit he’s done.

Hiiiii again!! 😊 I’m not sure if this is a request or not,

if it is I would love to write for you but unfortunately I haven’t watched hazbin hotel! 😅 I’ve heard of it tho! I know that one dude that’s all red and I’ve seen it on my feed before but I haven’t really indulged in it :P

if this wasnt a request then I can fill in some blanks from context clues and this is low key such a cute and wholesome topic 💗💗

I haven’t watched the show but I could just do the lov meeting mr. conpress’s s/o and daughters! That seems adorable 💛💫

🌷

[helluva-dump]

At this point, the hazbin/helluva critical community has fallen flat. And when I say that, I mean that it lacks potential. Like, I thought we were criticizing about the characters and the show itself. I thought we were talking about it's issues and what Viv could approve on it. But now, these people are just targeting fans of Viv's show who are just going on about their day, taking screenshots of harmful posts and posting it on the critical blog just to shit on them. You can't even consider that "critical" now when you're just being an asshole. They wonder why Viv and her fans think the critics are so bad. On top of that, these people love to make assumptions about Viv harassing Gooseworx all because she's a "terrible person" like please stfu. "She probably did this" and they don't even have any proof. Maybe consider that Viv actually enjoys tadc and it's success? What is all of this "viv is mad because the amazing digital circus is more successful than her shitty shows"? I dunno, man. That critical community is just so fucking dumb and stupid. They're not even talking about the shows anymore. They just bitch and fuss about everything.

For real, I had never seen such a critical community this much of a train wreck as the fandom is.

I mean hell, I engaged with the SVTFOE community before (and that show has the EXACT same problems as Helluva boss) and the critical blogs were very chill.

I feel like what didn’t help is how immature and unprofessional Vivziepop acts publicly. But at the same time…. I can’t really blame her for getting defensive when these antis dogpile her on everything.

And yes, the screenshots making fun of harmless posts of fans were red flags to me. Like dude, we have rabid fans and Stans do that to us, why the hell are you stopping to their level??? (I’m not gonna include the voodoo controversy because that to me needed to be talked about. A lot of POC fans and criticals had every right to discuss that and Viv should had given an apology or explanation over that. With closed religions that always got stereotypes due to colonizers, you need to be careful when writing about them. )

Oh God don’t get me started on the whole Vivziepop and Gooseworks relationship assumptions… that actually annoyed me too and I’m sure there’s no bad blood with them. I get she had bad blood with Tracey and possibly Ashley, but I don’t think it’s fair to assume she’s like this with every indie creator.

Honestly, its both of their fandoms that are acting unhinged. But I even seen hardcore fans of Viv like Dani praising TADC and Gooseworks, so I doubt the whole fandom are planning to sabotage them. TADC isn’t a rain full of sunshine either, they too have so much bad apples there.

Also my big issue with this community I’ve noted some critical blogs that claim they wanna make an original series (well one already made a webcomic) but they NEVER stop bitching about Viv and go on and on how they never do this to their project… unmmm dude? If you constantly compare your project to Viv’s, your gonna lose your audience this way. This can make you come off as an a logger and a very petty person to others. Trust me, this is NOT going to make people want to be interested in your original projects.

It’s also very unprofessional to do this publicly. I get looking at bad writing motivates you how to not to things… but the constant comparing is going to make you look like a very petty person to your outside audience. And they feel like your project won’t have agency on its own without being “better than Helluva/Hazbin.” I say this because I too am working on an indie project I want to make to a webcomic. And I REALLY don’t wanna ruin my reputation that way.

That’s what Zeartist did when he made his shitty ass books and would constantly hitch and whine about twilight on his life journals. And he would always bring up his original series and how it’s “better” and how he wouldn’t write such garbage like Stephanie Meyer.

And guess what???? His books are just twilight 2.0 but even worse 😂😂😂 he ended up doing the exact same thing stephanie did, bitches out over criticism, and yeah a huge hypocritical asshat.

That’s why constantly comparing your project to another person’s to seen as better is NOT a smart idea. Please have some self awareness there if your actually planning to make a webcomic or an original series.

Also… I’ve noticed people that have beautiful startled would waste it on blind hatred. Like that “I HAtE VIVZIEPOP” blog. Like godamn, their art is beautiful but they had an unhealthy hate obsession with Viv… why waste your energy on that when you can make something better?

I’m not talking about rewrites, AUs, or redesigns because to me those are like fanfics and for fun. The stuff I do is mainly just for fanfic fun and a writing/world building exercise for me. But also a little bit of self indulgence since I sitll admire Viv’s characters. You can enjoy something without giving your support to the actual creator. I’m trying to show my support to the team behind it.

(I’m even planning to buy fan merch from one of the clean up artists on their shop. To me it’s the ethical way of getting Hazbin/Helluva merch without directly giving it to Viv but to her artists instead. )

[theproverbialpen]

Musings from a Hazbin Fan and Hotel Employee

Yeah, that's right—I'm posting to this blog for the first time in years because I got into Hazbin Hotel of all things. Not only did I get into this cursed fandom, I'm writing fan fiction for it. Fan fiction. I think the last time I wrote fanfiction was...2012? 2013? And I only ever told 3 people about that one. Now here I am posting on main. The brainrot truly is unquantifiable.

If you're one of the few people that survived the purge of those I know IRL, congratulations. Please don't judge me lol. Anyways, actual musings are below the cut!

So I’m writing a fun little fanfic on AO3 and after someone left a comment (if you’re reading this, still genuinely one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me about my craft), it occured to me—as a Hazbin Hotel enjoyer, I have a pretty unique perspective on the series as an IRL hospitality professional. So! Thought it would be some cute bonus content to talk a little bit more about my life at an actual hotel and how it’s impacted my experience with Vivziepop’s hit series. 

Please note: this is written purely for shits and giggles. I don’t actually have any issues with the setting of Vivzie’s narrative or how it plays into the stories she and her team want to tell. I fucking love this show, to a potentially unhealthy degree, and I haven’t had this much fun with a series since like…okay well my hyperfixations change like every few months, but still. Point is, this isn’t actually critique, or satire, or anything with negative or critical intentions. TLDR; this post is for funsies, get off my dick.

So Who TF Am I, Anyways?

A little background on myself, for context. I’ve been employed at my hotel for almost a year now, and it’s my first hospitality job. I work in the Sales and Events department and I’ve come to learn that Group Business is actually integral for keeping a hotel up and running. When your average person (read: me before this job) thinks about hotels and traveling, you’d think it’s all about the families, bloggers, and individual travelers when it comes to guests and revenue. But in actuality, most of a hotel’s revenue—at least in the market I work in—will come from contracted room blocks and events. 

That’s where folks in my department come in. We work with clients to negotiate contracts and secure occupants for our hotel year round. Simply put, if we don’t do our jobs well, then no one else gets hours. So as much as the anti-capitalist in me will sometimes hate being a cog in the machine, it is really fulfilling to be able to help clients meet their needs while also making sure my coworkers are able to put food on the table. 

Speaking of being a cog in the machine, because of my role in Sales, this means that whenever I travel or think about hotels, I’m always thinking about the revenue side of things. I also work more with the Events team, so operations are also on the forefront of my mind. Which leads me to my principal quandary for this little blog post:

How in the Hell does the Hazbin Operate?

I have a laundry list of questions. A laundry list that’s almost as big as the actual pile of dirty laundry that is currently plaguing my bedroom floor. I will summarize (which is a generous word given how fucking verbose I can be) below:

Issue #1: Revenue Generation

Okay listen, I know Charlie is the Princess of Hell. I know she probably has unlimited capital, whatever that looks like in the HelluVerse. And I know the Hazbin is literally there to help rehabilitate people so charging them to stay would be counterproductive.

But my dude…do you understand how much money would be needed to run an operation of this scale?

At the end of Season 1, the new Hazbin is huge. Like it easily looks as big, if not bigger, than the hotel I work at which has nearly 500 rooms. Do you know how much revenue our team has to generate to keep this place running? Do you know how many millions our target goal is set at for each quarter? How many hundreds of thousands my coworkers’ individual quotas are set to? And sunshine in a bottle over here doesn’t charge her residents anything????? 

How does she get all those decorations? How does she order food or inventory? We know Hell has an economy, like Angel literally says he needs to save money for drugs in his first appearance. Is she…does she even pay her staff???

It is utterly appalling that Charlie is able to operate a hotel of this scale, both because of how it doesn’t make sense from a business perspective and because there are IRL billionaires that could probably do the same thing and solve homelessness overnight. 

Speaking of scale:

Issue #2: The Hazbin’s Systems, Or Lack Thereof

Okay so, yes, there’s only like…one official resident of the hotel, maybe two if Cherri moves in and doesn’t become a staff member (RIP Pentious, you would have loved living with Cherri Bomb). With the staff the way it is, that’s a solid 5:1 ratio, which is beyond ideal. But—and I touch on this in the fic—I feel I must reiterate: the new Hazbin is fucking massive. And you know what that means? It’s going to be able to hold a lot of guests. Guests that will need staff to take care of them. Let’s review:

Charlie is the owner and mostly teaches classes. Vaggie is the co-owner and kind of acts as the Executive Assistant to Charlie’s General Manager. I guess Alastor is the Hotel Manager? I’m gonna be honest, I have no idea what he does, but generally speaking he’s supposed to be the jack of all trades and manage the rest of the staff. Niffty handles Housekeeping and I guess would be the director of that. Husk is the bartender but like canonically only really eats pub food so he definitely can’t be the Food & Beverage head. 

Let’s say we scrap the Sales and Revenue Departments because clearly they don’t need income, but we keep a Marketing position so that Charlie can get the word out about the hotel. That leaves us with the need for Engineering, Front Desk, Rooms, and F&B staff. And like, not just one person—that would fucking suck—but proper staff. And given their track record of organization and managing the hotel…let’s just say, I would not be applying to the Hazbin Hotel anytime soon. Honestly, it sounds like that job would qualify to be the new tenth circle of Hell. 

What Does the Hazbin Get Right About IRL Hospitality?

So yes, clearly the world of the Hazbin Hotel leans towards the more fanciful—it is a story about Hell after all. However, there have been some moments that have made me chuckle as a hotel employee, things that are relatable for us in the hospitality world. Allow me to highlight them for you below:

Everyone is Bat Shit Crazy

Hospitality professionals are weird. So weird. Before I started my job, I was terrified of the level of professionality I would need to have. When I first got hired, I was given a whole packet on dress code and appropriate conduct. As you can probably tell from my writing style, this was concerning: I can be professional when I need to be, but I cannot maintain that guise for extended periods of time. Call it my toxic trait.

I also already had this impression of poised and put-together hotel staff from my previous experiences with travel. All the Front Desk agents would be in these clean and wrinkle-free clothes with kind yet business-forward attitudes, office workers would be walking around in full suits, and occasionally you’d see the hotel management on the floor if you were looking. Let me tell you now—it is a facade. An act. An incredible stage production unfolding in real time where all the staff do their absolute damndest to make you feel like you are in an organized and professional institution. Not unlike a certain hit animated musical.

My direct supervisor, the literal Director of Catering and Events, once told me that being a liiiiiittle crazy was a prerequisite for working in our department during the hiring process for a new Sales Manager. She was wrong—the prerequisite is not “a little” crazy. The prerequisite is being bat shit insane. And it’s not just our department, oh noooOoooOo, it is every department. Downstairs in our little basement dungeon, we make out of pocket comments, scream at random intervals, and swear way more than we should (that one might be my fault…according to my partner I swear more at work than at home and apparently it’s rubbing off on my colleagues), but that behavior is in no way restricted to just the Sales Team. 

I process the checks that are sent to our property and our Director of Rooms makes me say “can I get a WITNESSSS” before she signs off on the drop log (Charlie-core). If I don’t say it high pitched enough or with enough vigor, she makes me do it again. I once watched a guy in Engineering climb a tall step ladder balanced with two legs on a platform and a third leg balanced on a wooden plank his coworker was holding steady. The fourth leg was over the open air. Let me reiterate: the open. Fucking. Air. Tell me you can’t see Angel Dust and Cherri doing that shit.

Speaking of Engineering, you wanna know what dumbass thing happened just this morning? The Regional Director of the department—regional meaning he manages teams all across our area, like top level type shit—told us about this cursed ass Instagram trend he found where allegedly, putting ketchup on a Kit Kat tasted like fudge. So right there and then, him, myself, and two other coworkers decided ‘why the fuck not?’:

I would never seek it out willingly again, but I honestly didn’t hate it. 

The point of all of this is to say—the antics the Hazbin crew get up to? Totally realistic. I could see my coworker Robert throwing me into an active battlefield against my will. We have deadass done the role playing thing Angel and Pentious did during our trainings, and it was just as unhinged. Every day some shit happens at this hotel and I’m just like, “Yup. That could happen in Hazbin.”

“Call Now! Or Don’t! I Don’t Care! We Still Don’t Have a Working Phone!”

I would like to preface this section by saying: if you happen to be a Front Desk associate, I’m sorry. This is not directed at you, this is directed at your managers and their communication skills that may or may not exist. If you are somehow a manager reading this, uh—first of all, cringe. Second of all, I hope these next few paragraphs don’t apply to you. If they do and you’re offended: that’s a certified you-problem, babes. 

There are three certainties in this life: death, taxes, and miscommunication from your fucking managers. Tell me why in this past week alone I have been in 5 different email threads regarding fuck-ups and complaints from guests about things that we had clearly communicated. Tell me why in these email threads, people were attempting to throw me under the bus or shift the blame to my team. Tell me why I have gone to every single individual office in my department complaining about this. Tell me why this isn’t the first time this has happened.

Another hotel tidbit: across the board, Q1 (Jan-Mar) is supposed to be slow, for all of hospitality. It’s the time to get the metaphorical phone lines working, ya know? Our Q1 was stupidly busy, so I get it, people were slammed and short staffed. But like… we had time. Time to iron out our communication, time to create systems and processes that would ensure we’d be all set when things got busier. Yet here I am at the start of Q2 with an entire fist shoved up my ass being puppeted around to fix other people’s mistakes. 

It’s times like these when I go back to rewatch Hazbin for the like 26th time and I watch Charlie and Alastor run the hotel and I’m just like “whyyYyYyYyYyYy”. Like I KNOW Vaggie has had days where she’s like, “what…what am I supposed to be doing right now? Like what is my job, what… What?” 

It’s not just Front Desk either. It’s every department, even my own bosses. Like the call is coming from inside the house, sweetie, why did you tell this Sales Manager that I was taking care of all her commissions but you didn’t tell me this. Why am I blocking a room for an Orientation the following Monday at fucking 5:45 PM on a Friday. Why am I JUST finding out about a VIP guest when I have been asking you if you had any notes for me for the whole week.

I touch on it in my fic as well but like…pretty sure Charlie just, decides to host her classes day of. And that drives me insane. Like I…there are processes. Things that need to be done so that everyone is on the same page. You don’t just wing this shit, that’s how you end up with Susan calling your Director to tell her that you’re a useless waste of space not even deserving of the air in your lungs because you didn’t give her her fucking breakfast voucher. 

As a character, I love Alastor. If I were ever in the same room as him, I’d probably hate him. But if there’s anything relatable about that Geneva Convention Violation on Legs it’s his absolutely done attitude in Episode 1’s opening commercial.

Charlie Loves Helping People, and So Do We!

Alright, I’ve complained for enough paragraphs, let’s be positive for a second. The thing that is by far the most true to life in Hazbin Hotel is how much joy Charlie gets from taking care of her guests. Like…that’s our bread and butter in the hospitality world. Well, maybe just the butter; we need that bread in the form of cold hard cash (or direct deposits, whatever works best). But as much as I will bitch and moan about the difficulties of working in a hotel, there’s nothing quite as fulfilling as a guest telling you that you made their entire trip better. The butterflies I get reading reviews where my coworkers are mentioned by name and a guest writes about how we completely turned around their bad day are an absolute delight. It just means the world knowing that you can have that kind of impact on someone, even if it’s just in the little things.

In Episode 2, when Charlie and the crew are welcoming Sir Pentious and she just starts vibrating with excitement is exactly how I feel when I get to meet a client that we’ve been working with for months and finally welcome them to our property. When they sing “It Starts With Sorry” and just get to have a moment of empathy and compassion together, it reminds me of the clients and the phone calls I take where I get to ask them about their goals and help them feel like they’re supported and heard. In the grand scheme of things, is a nice phone call or interaction with some hotel employee going to change your life? Probably not. But for those few moments when their burdens seem lighter is why I love my job.

This goes for guests, and for my fellow coworkers. I’ve been very blessed to start my hospitality career in an unusually supportive work culture. Yeah, we can be some right petty bitches sometimes, but overall everyone is so encouraging and so quick to help lighten each other’s loads. Like in Episode 5 (best episode btw, for obvious reasons) when all the Hazbin Crew are working together to prepare the hotel for Lucifer’s arrival, that shit made me so giddy cause like- that’s us! Look at us go! We workin together so hard, we’re so cute! Like when Niffty and Pentious are baking and she looks up at him all excited n’ shit—that’s literally been me working with our Director of Restaurants on new food menus or promotional material. 

There’s something about being in an occupation where your whole purpose is to take care of people that really brings out the selflessness in you, and I think that’s what makes the hotel such a great setting for Charlie’s mission of redemption. I didn’t realize that until writing this paragraph tbh, but yeah, it just kinda…works. When your job is to make sure other people have a good time and feel supported and you’re surrounded by people that make you feel the same way, it’s a lot easier to want to choose to do good, to do right by the people around you. So as much as I have some silly little nitpicks…yeah, I can admit—I love that this show is about the Hazbin Hotel specifically.

Anyways, if you made it this far, thanks for reading! Next update for Life is In Redemption will be out in the days to come, just thought this would be a fun addition while I work on some of the content with my friends. This upcoming chapter is going to have a co-author, so get hyyyyyped :)

[thishazbinamistake]

*Mild spoilers*

I watched the first episode, so here are my kind of disjointed thoughts if anyone is interested in hearing them:

So first off, I thought it was okay visually. I tried to ignore the weird animation errors, like how in one scene I noticed Charlie has five fingers on one of her hands instead of her usual four, and that they never fixed that one scene where Vaggie just... disappears in the background (you know the one), because I try not to be too harsh the animators for these sorts of things. But it definitely felt amateurish in places. Other than that, Viv definitely wasn't lying when she said it looked "fine". I've seen worse, for sure.

The voice acting ranges from pretty good to honestly terrible. Stephanie sounded like she could not give less of a shit about being there, and had some weird annunciation, making her kind of hard to understand in places. I was optimistic about Keith, and he sounded great, but honestly did not fit the character of Husk very well. Charlie was actually quite good, she has a great singing voice and overall I thought Erika did a good job for her. Alastor was decent, Amir definitely did a better job than I was expecting, considering how iconic Edward's performance was in the pilot. Niffty didn't talk nearly enough in the first episode for me to even form an opinion on her voice acting, but she's fine, I guess? Katie is literally just Brandon Rogers doing his Brandon Rogers voice.

Blake was super annoying, and he did not make Angel's constant sex jokes endearing or funny in the slightest. For the record, I didn't even like pilot Angel in the first place, but now, compared to this, I'm honestly starting to miss him. And I'm not even going to touch that "this body was made to be exploited" line with a ten foot pole.

Adam, though... God, he was easily the worst part of this first episode. His surfer-dude voice was annoying as shit, and his lines were so cringeworthy. He is not an entertaining or engaging villain in the slightest. Literally, every time he was on screen I was just waiting desperately for the scene to change.

In the first episode, we hardly get any glimpse into the personalities of honestly most of the characters besides Adam and maybe Angel, which is unfortunate because they're the two most annoying characters.

With Lucifer and Lilith's backstory, in typical Vivzie fashion, Lucifer is the sad uwu boy while Lilith is treated as being the one responsible for everything. Not really surprising.

As for the writing, it's 30% boring exposition, and 70% unfunny sex jokes. Literally most of Adam's dialogue is sex related. I hate him so much it's unreal.

And the songs... they sounded fine, but they don't feel like something you would want to casually listen to on their own. They just feel like they're meant to be transitions from one scene to the next and nothing more.

For as little as we saw her, I think my favorite part of the first episode was Niffty. She's honestly a super cute and fun character, and the scenes with her were the few times I actually cracked a smile. She's such a little freak and I love her. Everyone else was either boring or made me want to shove a screwdriver in my ears.

Finally, one of the most glaring issues to me (aside from Adam) is that the show didn't really give much of a setup for what was happening. We got a little exposition about Lucifer and Lilith and the fall of man and all that, but aside from Charlie, we aren't reintroduced to any of the characters from the pilot. This feels like a really dumb move because it's alienating to new viewers. If you were someone with no knowledge of the pilot scrolling through Amazon Prime looking for a new show to watch, and Hazbin caught your eye, you'd probably get confused about who all these characters are and what it is they're actually doing, so you'd probably just click off and look for something different. It's obvious the writers just assumed that everyone watching had already seen the pilot, I guess because they think only longtime fans would be interested in the show, which is honestly really sad. You'd think they'd want to try and grow their audience more, but it just feels like they only want to pander to the people who are already fans, which feels like a bad desicion from both a storytelling standpoint as well as a business one. A show, especially one that migrated from an internet pilot to a full series on a paid streaming platform, should be able to stand on its own two legs without needing the pilot to do all the explaining. Especially considering the designs and voice actors changing between the pilot and the series. I didn't expect them to completely remake the pilot, but they could have at least done a better job establishing the characters.

All in all, episode one was at best a 5/10. Like I said, I've seen far worse but this just felt like a bad note to start this all off on. For newcomers, it's confusing and downright unappealing, and for longtime fans it's just disappointing. I can really only see diehard Vivzie fans getting a ton of enjoyment out of it.

Still need to watch episode two, maybe things will improve from there.

[gun-witch]

Coming back from watching Hazbin Hotel, having been pleasantly surprised (I honestly thought I was going to be disappointed) only to see tags flooded with some of the most disgustingly bad faith readings of what's going on in the show.

Yeah the Hazbin fandom has some really obnoxious people (I've had to deal with some really dumb shit over my own criticisms of the show) but I almost can't blame them with how blatantly malicious the people who hate-watch are.

Like, Christ, dude, you're allowed to not like something you don't have to justify it with reaches like "drawing inspiration from some other series is LITERALLY plagiarism" and "waiting until a few episodes in to start developing a side character is such bad writing!"

If Hazbin appeased these people every episode would end up like the pilot and we all know how shit that was. This isn't critique, this is Cinemasins bullshit.

[nerevarswritingstuff]

How about a hazbin hotel valentino x reader fic? The way you write him, in my opinion, is the best.

//sees this

//looks at all the people liking/rebloging my Valentino x Reader snippets or Vox x Reader snippets

I knew y'all would crawl out of the wood work once the show came out. I felt it in my bones.

(I joke, I'm glad y'all enjoy these fucked up lil dudes as much as I do <3)

Nonetheless, THANK YOU SO MUCH //SOBS writing that moth bastard was always a blast! To answer your question, I can't say for sure if I'll ever end up writing an actual multi-chapter fic with a Valentino x Reader or even a Vox x Reader relationship, mainly because I'm so busy with other projects. Maaaaaybe I'd do small snippets as I did in the past if an idea comes to me? But otherwise, I can't promise I'll actually go through with a dedicated multi-chapter thing.

That isn't to say I'm unwilling to write them if people are willing to commission for it, but unfortunately, I'm not taking requests anymore due to my schedule ;-;

[tonberry-yoda]

I dont know if its just me but i hate seeing people age minors up to write nsfw stuff about them. Like if u do this your weird and stay away 🔥🔥🔥 —-🐉 anon… (again😭💔)

YES

(this became a long rant, so you can read that under the cut)

For me, I HATE when it's the MHA fandom. When it is the students, it is very uncomfortable for me to see that kinda stuff ESPECIALLY when the account is like a 26 year old or something, it's hella uncomfy

For JJK, one of my first requests was to age up Megumi to have him be a father and reluctantly, I did it. I would probably never do it again honestly because again, he's like my little dude. Like when I see people writing for Yuji I'm like WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! We have nanami and gojo and you chose the 15 year old?!?!?!

Now for the kinda other side here. When it comes to Jojo, we all love Jotaro, but he ages up in the show, so you can talk about 17-40 year old jotaro, so that's when it's okay. You can do that with any character in jojo because of the timeline and we actually see them age

so in that case... can't we just do that with other stuff?

now here's the answer

no. we cant

you are showing that you are attracted to the really young version and wanting to age them up. Seeing a 26 year old with a bio that says "in love with bakugo" please stop omfg

NOW HEAR ME OUT

Spiderpunk (aka Hobie Brown) from Across the Spiderverse hasn't had a confirmed age, but goddamn is he fine af. But in that case, what do people do? I have seen people say his age is up for interpretation and that he can't be like 15 because look at him???? So in this case, sometimes that can be okay if that makes sense

And again, I love Haikyuu and it actually reveals what they do in the future, so I think it's alright to age them up

I think for me it's fandom based. If you want to give me some examples that you wanna call out, please let me know because I would love to chat about this more

Also, another thing I'm not super into is x child!reader. I used to get those requests A LOT and my account was for romance based fics mostly. A lot of the requests I were getting were 13 or younger children asking to be platonically with characters from MHA, which wasn't a huge problem, I just would rather not write it. But when it really got me was when someone asked for a child!reader with characters from HAZBIN HOTEL AND HELLUVA BOSS?!?! Literally no. That is not for children. I dont care if they have access to it, they should not be in my inbox asking for that. I stopped writing for the fandom completely and a lot of those people left. But x child!reader should be for them if they're on this app. I don't like writing it at all and only did it for a short period because I felt like I had to. I was too scared to change my rules at the time until I finally did and then people actually respected them. But it was weird to hear kids wanting to "be with Aizawa" as a more dad character, but that's just for me

Sorry for turning this a whole other direction, but those are some other things that I just wanted to add since we were in this convo

Thanks for sending this as always and feel free to share more of what you think on the topic because you have honestly given me the courage I need to say no to a lot of things more lol