#i'm sick of it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[scapegods]

[joemerl]

#perfect year for the end of the world

not to be a number nerd on main but 2025 (45^2) will be the only square year most of us ever experience. the last one was 1936 and the next one will be 2116

[koolades-world]

being sick sucked. the only good part about being sick in the devildom was not being able to infect anyone other than solomon, and the extended breaks you got after you came down with something.

one of the many privileges you were given was full control the the tv in the living room. you'd been sick a couple times while in the devildom at this point, so the brothers had already had their major freakouts over minor things. you were in the ideal stage of being sick right now: the brothers were still unsure enough to know if you were exaggerating your symptoms (to get what you wanted, of course!) but sure enough to know you're not about to keel over and die.

it was a saturday, and everyone was home. you didn't go to rad the past few days because you came down with something solomon had contracted while off in the depths of the devildom. nobody really knew what it was, but the most notable symptom was that your sweat now sparkled. it was only a little alarming to lucifer and barbatos, but since they couldn't figure out what the hell solomon had given you, they deemed rest to be the most appropriate solution. however, to you, this was the only sign you needed to put on the twilight saga.

at first, only asmo seemed interested in actually watching it with you. he'd somehow never seen it, so you quickly put it on. asmo was bundled in one of the many blankets that surrounded you at all times, while you sat in the middle of the nest, sweating- half because you were constantly overheating, and half because you were watching twilight.

mammon passed by the living room several times while completing tasks around the house, and made comments about the movie every single time. it was "this movie is stupid" and "yer seriously still watchin' this?" at first. then, it morphed into him lingering just behind the couch you were seated on, holding something he was in the middle of polishing. when you'd turn back to look at him, he'd pretend he wasn't paying attention whatsoever. when you finally invited him to join after catching him staring for the fifth time, and patted the seat besides you, he objected quickly, claiming "ya can keep yer vampire slop."

he returned in five minutes.

when beel got home from his workout, he tried to join you right away. asmo made him go take a shower first, which you felt hypocritical agreeing with. your oddly sparkly sweat stained whatever fabric it came into contact with. once the sweat evaporated, the sparkles were the only thing left behind.

once jasper came onto screen, mammon made a comment about his stare reminded him of lucifer's. you and asmo burst out laughing harder than you'd laughed in a long time. unfortunately for mammon, lucifer happened to be walking by at that very moment. you managed to talk lucifer out of punishing mammon when you claimed he was helping you out as your emotional support demon. sweating sparkles for an unknown reason was stressful work, after all.

satan walked by with a thick book, and promptly paused once he saw what you were watching. he'd read, and loved the books. he shoved mammon aside to sit next to you, so the two of you could excitedly chatter about the movie and book differences.

once the part where edward sparkled in the middle of the forest came on screen, you dramatically reenacted it in the middle of your living room, while getting beel to hold a flashlight over your head. you had the entire living room doubled over laughing, making the exertion worth it. the only one sensible to ask you to sit back down was lucifer, who had decided to watch the movie by standing at the back of the room, and denying that he even was. and upon seeing the baseball scene, all the brothers present (minus lucifer) wanted to do that immediately.

oh boy, what had you started?

[ms-demeanor]

I hate to say that, but in defense of homeopathy:

A lot of medicine is value projection and/or placebo. We give kids sparkly bandaids on minor abrasions not to help the symptoms or risks of infection, but so that the kid feels cared for.

We sometimes take daily medication not because it helps or we think we need it, but because our grandma raves all about this new cure-all that fixed all her issues.

We overindulge in paracetamol and ibuprofen even in the cases it clearly doesn't work because we need to feel like we took something that will help.

Homeopathy that tries to replace standard treatment is evil. But there is value in having a readily available, socially valued, thing you take when feeling bad, that does absolutely nothing.

In the 20s they just did heroin instead, it wasn't better.

So there's this thing called informed consent that is kind of super duper important and the use of placebo to treat illness is a major violation of informed consent.

Everybody likes the gifset from the Birdcage with the Aspirin with the A and the S scraped off because it's cute and funny, but it's cute and funny in a movie; if a "medical professional" is giving you sugar pills because they don't actually know how to treat you and want to offer you comfort instead, they're saying "you're too fucking stupid to handle the fact that you're ill so I'm going to hold your hand for a moment and hope that makes you feel better."

Your attitude is both fatalistic and tremendously paternalistic, and people with complex illnesses and chronic pain deserve to be treated better than kids getting a sparkly bandaid and a pat on the head.

People overuse painkillers because they're in pain; NSAIDs have effects, even if they aren't treating the root cause of pain, and people often take them because even though they won't stop a spasm, they'll make it less painful for a few hours and if that's what you've got, that's what you take.

The huge, regular doses of ibuprofen I used to take to help my migraines when I didn't have health insurance didn't stop the migraines, but they made it so I could work. What DID help was getting medically diagnosed with celiac disease and no longer triggering my autoimmune disorder on a daily basis.

You know what wouldn't have helped? A sympathetic listener and a sugar pill. Or worse, yet another sympathetic listener telling me about some fucking lead-contaminated turmeric supplement that cured their granny's headaches.

Shit on the heroin cures all you want, they at least included a legitimate cough suppressant and had a mechanism of action more effective than a patronizing lecture about how we've all got to get on somehow, so we might as well pretend we feel better.

Fuck your shitty, shitty attitude. Sick people deserve better than you.

[fl3shm4id3n]

ᴏɴᴇ ᴍᴏʀᴇ ɢᴀᴍᴇ

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐫 𝟑𝟖𝟎 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐚 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮. 𝐖𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐃𝐢𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐫 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨 𝐢𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨? 𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐞, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟. 𝐃𝐢𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞?

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: ᴛʜᴀɴᴏꜱ (ᴄʜᴏɪ ꜱᴇᴜɴɢ-ʜʏᴜɴ) x ꜰᴇᴍ! ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

ꜱᴏɴɢ: ᴅᴏᴊᴀ ᴄᴀᴛ - ʙᴇᴇɴ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜɪꜱ

Tw: Squid Game 2 SPOILERS, Smut, toxic relationship, death, blood, swearing, reader takes a pill, Thanos and reader fight, not lights out scene, makeup sex? titty grabbing, eating out, squirting, jerking off, public sex (literally), mating press, cream pie, making out.

A/N: Who should I do next? I'm thinking either player 124 or player 388

Masterlist

ʙᴇꜰᴏʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏ ᴀɴʏ ꜰᴜʀᴛʜᴇʀ, ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ɴꜱꜰᴡ/ꜱᴍᴜᴛ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ, ɪꜰ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪꜱʜ ᴛᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ʀᴇᴀᴅ, ꜱᴋᴇᴅᴀᴅᴅʟᴇ, ɪꜰ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪꜱʜ ᴛᴏ ᴘʀᴏᴄᴇᴇᴅ, ᴛʜᴇɴ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴏᴡɴ ʀɪꜱᴋ.

When you got back from the bathroom, you noticed how many players did. But most seemed unhappy, because the price money wasn't going to get higher. When the final team came back, it was time to vote, it was from 001 to whatever players left. Player 001 who originally had wanted to stay, pressed X. He might of had a change of thought. When it was close to your turn, Thanos turned you around to face him. "Remember what we talked about babygirl." He said, not caring that his underling was standing next to him. You nodded, then number 013 was up, which was you. Before you left, Thanos gave you a kiss on the forehead, then encouraged you to go. You walked over to the voting station, without thinking twice, you pressed O. You heard how Thanos let out a cheerful yell. "That's my baby!" he said, loudly. Your face heated up. But you didn't mind, when you changed your X to an O. You walked towards the O side.

You then waited for the rest of the players to vote. There was some commotion. Players arguing over the situation that happened prior and how the players who wanted to continue were sick for wanting to stay and all that. When you saw a girl crying, wanting to go home, made you feel bad. Was staying really the right thing? You never thought that your actions would effect others. But they did. That got you thinking. When Thanos voted, again on O. He made a beeline towards you. Hugging you tightly, happy that you've decided to stay and play more games. Again, X was out numbered by O. Afterwards, you ate with Thanos, his underling player 124, player 380 and player 125. He had complained about the food, but he ate it anyway since it was the only food that you were getting.

Later on, you and Thanos parted ways, going to your bed which was on the other side. You sat down on your bed, taking off your shoes and paced them on the stairs next to your bed. "So, you and that purpled haired guy?" You heard someone say, looking up. You saw that it was player 380, she was supper pregnant. "Oh, uh." You said, not knowing what to say. "Come on. Everyone saw the way you and him were acting earlier." She commented. You sighed, awkwardly. "Yeah, me and him are back to together." You responded. The girl raised her brow. "Back together?" She asked. "Yeah, we broke up and we got back together." You said, player 380 simply nodded her head slowly.

"So, what made you change your mind? About the games, I thought you wanted to leave." She asked. "I did, but, me and Thanos talked. He said that we should play one more game, so that the money can go up. And we'll leave after. Then we'll pay our debts and start a new life." You explained, you sounded like a school girl in love. The girl only looked at you, shocked about your little fairy tale ending. "And you believed that?" She asked. Your face then turned one of confusion. "What do you mean?" You asked her, chuckling nervously. "You really think he'll stop at this game? What if he doesn't? Then what?" She asked you. Now that she said it, you never thought of it. "I..." You couldn't respond. You didn't know what to say. "Or what if he's simply back with you just to take your half of the money?" She asked one more time. Yet again, you didn't answer, you didn't know what to say. You never thought about any of that. You simply said yes to everything Thanos said.

Player 380 sighed, seen the confused look on your face. "I don't want to be that one person, but. Don't believe everything he says. I can see that you're blinded by your idea of love. But just don't get your hopes up too high." She said, then she walked over to her bed which was in front of yours. When the lights went off, you simply laid in bed. Thinking about what player 380 said earlier. It began to eat at you now. What if he doesn't want to stop on the next game? What if he wants to keep going? What if the games get even deadlier. Tons of what ifs.

The next morning, you woke up. You barely got any sleep that night. You kept over thinking about what player 380 said. You simply ignored it for now. You got up, put on your shoes and went to find Thanos. Shortly the new game started. Again, you were escorted to the game hall. The new was called Mingle, you remember playing it at school during a field trip. It seemed harmless, but it wasn't. While the platform span around, a cheery song played. It was kind of catchy. Meanwhile, Thanos was dancing a bit, followed by his underling. Who simply followed his lead like a lost dog. After a bit the platform stopped and the number 10 was called. You, Thanos, his underlings and the two other players were five, you just needed five more. Then another group of five spotted you all. Without hesitation. You all ran to an empty room as fast as you could.

Once the door closed. Everyone let out a sigh of relief. When the timer went out, you heard how people were panicking and running. Then came the gunshots. You couldn't help but look out the small opening. You saw how the pink men shot the people that didn't make it in time. All you could do was watch, you felt your stomach turn, seen how they were getting killed. Thanos then pulled you away from the door. "Don't look." He said, as he continued to hold you. Until the gunshots stopped, you heard the pickup trucks that came with the coffins to collect the bodies. When the bodies were picked up, you were let out.

As you all walked out, you saw the puddles of blood on the floor. It made your stomach turn, but you walked back to the platform. Again, the music began to play and the platform proceeded to move. Thanos and his underling began to dance together this time. As if people didn't just die and their was both on the floor and onto the platform. The platform stopped, yelling out four players. Thanos told his underling to go find another group while you and the other two players took off the nearest empty room. Same scenario. When the count down was over, the people who didn't make it got killed. You had decided to cover your ears, not wanting to listen to the cries, screams and gunshots. You wanted to throw up so badly.

When it was over, you were allowed to step out again. But when you stepped out. You stepped in a puddle of blood. You looked down and saw your reflection on the sticky crimson liquid. You froze for a moment, just staring at the color red. Until you heard Thanos. "Hey y/n!" You looked up, seen him already on the platform. "Come one baby girl! Come on!" He said. You walked over. Getting on the platform again. You stood next to Thanos, breathing heavily. There was more blood on the platform then before, you also noticed the bloody foot prints. "You good baby?" Thanos asked you. "Yeah, just... there's a lot of blood." You mentioned, Thanos hummed.

Then got an idea. He opened his cross and took out a pink colored pill. "Here, you'll feel better babe." He said, while he tried to hand you the pill. "I... I don't think I should." You said, but Thanos wasn't going to take a no for an answer. "I know." He said, then he placed the pill on his tongue. You knew what that meant. You did it countless times, but you were shy doing it in front of people. "Come on baby." He said. You swallowed your saliva. And leaned towards him, as you were about to take the pill into your mouth. Thanos pulled you into a full on open mouth tongue kiss. Making sure you swallowed the pill. His underling let out a whistle, while player 125 looked away and player 380 just stood there awkwardly. When Thanos pulled away, he smiled and kissed your cheek. You face was burning hot with embarrassment.

The game started again. It went from 3 players, to 6 players to the last round which was 2. The same thing happened. You covered your ears and closed your eyes. Trying to muffle out the noise. You hated it, hated hearing people scream and beg for them not to kill them. You didn't want to be here, you wanted to go home. Good thing was going too be the final game you play. Right?

Back at the lobby, you sat next to Thanos and his underling, who went by the name Nam Gyu were talking about player 333 and his lady friend 222. Obviously still mad about the crypto scam. Your mind was elsewhere, thinking about those people who died. Was the money really worth it? It was blood money, people died for it. Why did you feel that way? Wasn't the pill suppose to help you be happy or something? "Babe, you good?" You heard Thanos say, making you turn to look at him. "Yeah, all good. I'm just glad that, we're going home." You said, with relief. But Nam Gyu let our a laugh, you looked at him confused then at Thanos for an explanation. "Babe, lemme talk to you. Alone." He said, getting up and helped you up. Both of you going to a more private area.

"What's up?" You asked, while looking at him. "There was a change of plan." Thanos said, you looked at him confused. "What change of plan?" You asked. "Let's play another game. Just one more." He said, that made your stomach drop. "Another!?" You said, almost shouting. Thanos then held you by the arms. "Babe, come on. Just one more. Afterwards, we'll stop okay." He pleaded, but you weren't having it. "You said, we'd play one more game. I don't want to keep playing. I want to go home!" You said, now freaking out. "Babe, babe. Take deep breathes." He said trying to calm you down. "No! I'm not doing this!" You said, trying to walk away from him. But he pulled you back to him. "Babe, please." He tried pleading, but you removed his hand away from your arm and stomped away. Thanos groaned, annoyed.

During the voting, it went from 456 down to whatever players were left. Some people's vote remained the same and some changed their minds. When it was Thanos turn, he skipped his way over and kissed the button. He then turned and encouraged others to join O. He then locked eyes with you and blew you a kiss. You rolled your eyes, still mad at him. The voting continued, then it was your turn, you voted X. You switched your tag back to X. As you walked towards the X team, Nam Gyu glared daggers at you. "Fucking bitch." He said, then earned a hard smack from Thanos. "Don't disrespect my woman like that, you hear?!" He said, angrily at his underling who was rubbing the back of his head. "Sorry, but she's a fucking traitor!" He tried to defend himself, but he earned another smack in the head. "Keep talking like that about her and I'll kick your ass." He warned him, while Nam Gyu rubbed the back of his head. Thanos was going to have a word with you.

When the lights went out, you tossed and turned, not being able to sleep. Those around you were already in deep sleep. Including player 380. You kept your eyes closed, but struggled to get slumber. You then felt something crawling onto your bed, it was heavy. You opened your eyes to see what or who it was. It was Thanos, before you could shout his name. He covered your mouth, then placed his finger onto his lips. You understood, then Thanos removed his hand from your mouth. "What do you want?" You whispered. "I come in peace." He said, making you roll your eyes. "I know you're mad, but come on babe. One more game, we'll have more than enough." He whispered. "No, I don't want to keep playing. I can't stand the sight of people getting killed. The smell of blood makes me sick!" You told him.

Thanos gave you a pouting look. "I know babe, but please. Just one more game. One more. I promise it'll be the last." He pleaded, but you rolled your eyes. Not wanting to believe him. He sighed, he knew how stubborn you were. But he had an idea. He leaned over and kissed your cheek. "I'm sorry babe." He said, as he kissed your cheek, to your ear. "I'm sorry." He whispered. He kissed the back of your ear, moving down your neck. As much as you wanted to push him away, you didn't. You allowed him to kiss your neck. "Thanos." You tried to warn him, but you quickly melted into his touch. His hand moved up, then his hand slid under your shirt and moved your bralette a side popping out your breast under your shirt. Squeezing and knitting at it. Making you moan softly. "Shh." He said, as he continued to kiss your neck, then pinched your erect nipple. Making you gasp, but you covered your mouth with your hand.

He smirked, seen how his touches were working wonders on you. As always. He then moved in front of you. Removing the blanket off your lower half, then he processed to move towards your pants. Tugging them down along with your panties. You knew what he was doing. Once your lower half was exposed to him. He saw how wet you were. He laid on his stomach and placed your legs on his shoulders. Without hesitation, he took your clit onto his mouth, sucking it gently. Your back arched, moaning against your hand.

As Thanos sucked at your clit and licked your wet folds. His arms were wrapped around your thighs. Keeping you in place, as he continue to devour you. You felt his tongue thrusting inside you, his nose rubbed your clit. You bit your index finger, softly. Trying to muffle out your moans. He continued to suck and lick at your folds. He missed this. A lot. He let go of one of your thighs, then he reached down and pulled out his cock. Stroking it softly, using his precum as lube, but it wasn't enough. He pulled his hand back up, then spat on his hand. Both his saliva and his juices were mixed together, on his hand. He reached down again, stroking his cock again. But he groaned against your folds, feeling his hot and slick hand around his cock. Wishing it was your pussy.

If tonight was his last night alive, you were going to be his last meal. He went back to sucking at your clit, as he stroked himself. Faster, but not fast enough for him to cum. Just enough to edge himself a bit. You whined against the back of your hand. Your eyes screwed shut and your back arching by the seconds. You body began to heat up, again like the night before. You loved that feeling, that feeling that only Thanos could make you feel. It felt as if that drug from earlier was finally kicking in. Or was it just Thanos doing what he knows best. You then felt as Thanos pulled away from you, he quickly got between your legs. He lined his cock between your folds and easily thrusted into you. Stretching you out once again.

That stretch made you squeal in pleasure. Your walls clamped around Thanos, making him groan. "Fuck!" he hissed. He then placed both your legs over his shoulders and leaned his body down. His chest against yours. As he began to thrust, he processed to kiss you. Harshly, yet lovingly. You could taste yourself in his mouth, but you didn't care. You wrapped your arms around his torso. Kissing him as much as you could. His thrusts became faster and harder. Making you moan against his lips. He didn't stop, he continued to move not stopping once. Then one hand went down between you, rubbing your clit harshly. Having you whine and your walls calmp even tighter around him. Causing him to moan. You dug your nails harder onto his skin, slightly dragging them down his back. Scratching his back. You had forgotten where you were, but at that point, you didn't care. You were more focused on Thanos than to worry around the people around you.

Out of nowhere, you proceeded to squirt, your juices going almost all over your and Thanos also processed to cum inside you. As much as you wanted to scream, you didn't. Your mouth had been covered by Thanos, who was softly kissing your cheekbone. He too let out a breathy moan. He stopped thrusting, he remained still. On top of you. Catching his breath, as did you. You were weak, high in some sort of way. Probably because of the mind blowing orgasm you had. Thanos removed his hand away from your mouth. He smirked and gave your parted lips a small peck, as if he tried to alert you to come back from your high. You looked at him, smiling weakly at him. "Do you forgive me?" He asked, still whispering. As much as you wanted to stay mad at him, you couldn't. "Sure, I forgive you." You manage to say. That made Thanos happy. He leaned down and gave you a kiss on the lips. Followed by a couple more around your face making you giggle. "One more game. I promise. Just, one more and no more." He said, sounding genuine. Should you believe him again? Who knows. Just as long as he is with you, you'll live.

ᴘʀᴇᴠɪᴏᴜꜱ ᴘᴀʀᴛ, ɴᴇxᴛ ᴘᴀʀᴛ

[molsno]

what fucking world is she living in where a trans woman saying "men make me feel unsafe" will make her friend, who is also a trans woman, feel like she's being misgendered? does she have any transfem friends at all?

I also find this rich coming from her, considering she posted a screenshot of my unrebloggable readmore vent post to lecture me about my trauma inflicted by tme people in front of her audience of tens of thousands of followers, and when people told her that they were misgendering me and being aphobic to me, she shrugged her shoulders and said she couldn't control what they do. she's really gonna lecture us about making our transgender sisters feel unsafe, when she's so willing to throw her own under the bus? give me a fucking break.

"straw(wo)men, youre gonna make other trans girls scared youll turn against them" is really fucking wild for a trans woman with a huge platform to say.

[melminli]

I LOVEDDDDDDD your Thanos “bang bang bang” post and it made me very curious abt how they know eo and stuff and like I’d love to read more about it in general if you don’t mind. It’s so great and I love your writing <333 have a fun day / night 🫶🏻

BANG BANG BANG ll

summary - thanos was always just such an easy person to argue with. you really hated the guy and that was something that was never going to change, even if your life was on the line and it fucking was.

pairing: (thanos) choi su-bong x fem. reader

word count: 1.8k

contains: violence, angst, death, drug use and addiction, dark content - just usual squid game stuff really

a/n: ty so much! this turned out kinda freaky but that is because thanos is a freak so, i didn't really have a choice.

prev. | masterlist

There was an eerie silence among all the participants for the first few seconds after the first death happened. The realization of what this meant for everyone present slowly sank in, and you thought that maybe the crazy man with all his screaming, wasn't quite as crazy as you originally thought. The real madman was probably the person somewhere upstairs or - you didn't know exactly where, but you knew that they were watching you.

“Don't move!” His voice shouted again, but this time with a completely different force. It may be that this was the most logical conclusion one could draw from what had just happened, but some seemed to throw all logic out of the window as soon as the fear of death hit. It only took one person to panic to set off a domino effect and from one second to the next loud gunshots could be heard, following the fearful screams of one person after another. The participants were being slaughtered like frightened animals in a cage, what kind of sick game was really going on here?

You too began to tremble as you looked down at the floor, dissociating and trying to ignore your surroundings as best you could. You had to stop yourself from flinching when the person right next to you was killed, even as you felt his still warm blood covering your cheek, even as a small river of it started pooling around your foot. You were most likely going to leave a trace of him all over the ground as soon as you started walking again - whoever he was. It didn't take very long for everyone who had moved to be shot, maybe half a minute - and yet it must have been the worst half minute of your life so far.

“Don't you dare move,” Thanos said in a voice you weren't used to hearing from him. “I'm serious, don't make me mad.”

You just looked at his back from behind, with a tense posture while you tried to regain control of your breathing again. Finally, there was complete silence on the pitch again. Even if it wasn't an entirely welcome silence.

The voice from the loudspeakers began to speak again and you already knew that this would be a voice that would haunt you in your nightmares. “Let me repeat: You can move forward while the tagger shouts, Green light, red light. If your movement is detected afterward, you will be eliminated.”

Ah, so that's what you meant with eliminated. A bit literal but no biggie! The game continued, but no one really dared to move a muscle even when the puppet looked away. You then saw Thanos shift slightly out of the corner of your eye and noticed that he was pulling his cross necklace out of his t-shirt. Safe to say, that you could barely believe what you were seeing right before your very eyes. You've got to be kidding me, they took everything we had from us, but he was allowed to keep that old thing? “Are you seriously going to take that stuff now?” you whispered in disbelief but didn't really judge him for it. You were this close to just laughing out loud at the absurdity of the scene, but you didn't.

“You don't have to be jealous, sweetheart,” he replied with slightly shaky hands as he stopped his movement abruptly when the doll finished talking. He just stared longingly at the colorful pills in front of him. “I don't mind sharing with you, you know that.”

You sighed inwardly at the thing you were about to do. You had been clean for maybe about six years by now and quitting drugs of any kind overnight was really fucking hard - definitely one of the hardest things you had to do in your life. On the other hand, your life was still as shitty as before, the only difference being that you were now consciously depressed and unhappy, so who cares? You could die every second anyway. “Thanks.” you just said after taking the pill out of his hand and threw the thing as quickly as possible in your mouth as soon as the doll looked away. Yeah, you were the biggest hypocrite on earth, old news.

It only took maybe a few seconds after that for you to feel the effects of the pill and then finally, all the stress started to dissipate. Your muscles relaxed, all the shouting about whatever felt like a soft pillow hugging you and the weird laying positions of the dead around you suddenly seemed incredibly funny. These were really strong pills, you could practically feel your whole body tingling. “Why are they all suddenly forming a line?” you asked with a grin and Thanos just hummed, not knowing the answer himself. “No idea, but watch this,” he said and waited until the puppet had turned towards you to push the person next to him, causing everyone in front of them to fall over too. “Ding! You lost,” he told them while wiggling his eyebrows and smirking after he watched them get shot.

You didn't even try to stifle your laughter at the scene. “You really are such an asshole.” you replied, shoving him aside this time after the doll averted its gaze. You then ran away as fast and as far away as you could so that he couldn't take revenge on you for what you had just done. However, you quickly stopped moving with both hands in the air as soon as the girlish voice emitted red light as if you were surrendering to her. You stifled your grin and pretty much failed when you noticed a slightly older woman standing relatively close to you. “Hey, are you trying to hide behind me to use me as a shield?” you spoke out without moving your mouth much and watched as she began to sweat more after you realized what she was doing. Still, she didn't pay you any further attention. “And now you're ignoring me too?” you spat out annoyed and grabbed her by the arm when you were free to move and pulled her in front of you against her will.

She tried to fight you off but you forced her further forward while she tried to defend herself. “You're older than me, aren't you ashamed of yourself?” You asked her and stopped walking before the robot's face turned towards you.

Number 57, who was still resisting your grip, stumbled a little to the side when you suddenly let go of her. She was about to howl in delight when she noticed how everyone else stood still. “No…” she mumbled out fearfully. “It's because of that bitch! I didn't -” she tried to defend herself to someone as she looked around the room, but her head caught the bullet before she could even finish her sentence.

“I may be a bitch, but at least I'm still alive.” you sang to her dead body on the floor before running past her. You didn't know how much time was left, but you had almost made it to the finish line anyway. You stopped with your back to the robot girl this time and it didn't take you long to spot the purple hair in the crowd. “Su-bong!” you shouted his name, since you had somehow gotten separated while running. You waited until he yelled back with a what?! “Last one there, gets fucked in the ass!” you yelled out without any shame or filter and saw his facial expression turn serious at the challenge. “Let's Go!”

The whole game went by relatively quickly once you took the pill from Thanos. It was actually quite fun, you thought to yourself as you both jumped around like two crazy people with grinning faces, waving your arms around wildly. I know it's not socially acceptable to say this, but I fucking love doing drugs! It was like everything around you was happening in slow motion and all the decisions you made felt foggy, like you didn't even realize what you were doing.

You loved being this person, it felt great to forget everything and just - not think. “I have won! No, really! You crossed the line two steps after me, I saw it!” you exclaimed before Thanos could object to a single thing. “Didn't anyone else see that?” you exclaimed in disbelief as if the others weren't busy staying alive while watching several others die right before their faces. You didn't care about the looks they gave you as you waved your hand. “No, they definitely saw it. I won.”

Thanos just gave in with a heavy sigh and a roll of his eyes. “Yeah yeah, I'm getting fucked in the ass which is gay, very funny.” he just mumbled to himself annoyed, and continued to avoid your gaze, but couldn't help grin again when you slapped him on the shoulder laughing. “Hey, why did we stop doing all this again?” he asked you when he couldn't remember the reason. All he knew was that he hadn't had this much fun in a long time, even though he knew that he always had a great time with you - no matter what.

You laughed. “Oh, that's because you promised me that we'd both get clean together, and then you spent the money I gave you for rehab on more drugs behind my back. “ you laughed along with him, even if Thanos frowned a little at the memory and you started to smile forcedly after remembering again how he had betrayed you. “Or what was it again? Was it something about that Youtuber you told me about…” you mumbled to yourself obliviously, feeling any sense of happiness begin to fade. You finally gave up, the details weren't that important anyway. “It doesn't really matter though, right? In any case, you used the money for something else, whatever it was. Even though you knew how hard I worked for it - hell, I didn't even eat most days to scrape it together, man.” you stated while you looked him in the face, even though he averted his gaze from you. “That's just fucked up dude.”

Exactly. You actually hated being this person. You might not remember it right now, but you would as soon as the effects of the pill wore off, which hopefully wasn't soon. You really hoped it wasn't soon, because you didn't want to be aware of anything that had happened today.

[lowkeyerror]

Congrats on Your Divorce

Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Word Count: 4.1k

Notes: Requested, fluff & smut, librarian!reader, divorced!Wanda, smut, fingering, thigh-riding, cunnilingus

Summary: You befriend Wanda, a regular at the library you work at, after learning about her divorce. The friendship becomes something more one day when you come over to help her with her sick kids. As your relationship progresses you even talk about buying a home together, which leads to a physical manifestation of how much you love each other.

An: It took me awhile because I got a little carried away. I hope I did your request justice 🙇‍♀️.

Masterlist

You enjoyed the mundane lifestyle that came with working at the library. There was a comfort that came with knowing that you worked in something of a community center. Being able to provide a service that for some was the highlight of their day. In this day and age having regulars at the library was a rarity, especially the adults. Kids would come after school for homework or for research purposes, but the adults were few and far between.

Technically it may have been weird that you had a favorite but you couldn’t help yourself. There was a woman named Wanda, she’d come once a week ask for a recommendation and sit there the whole day and read it.

She’d always make a comment or two on the book on her way out and it made you smile. It was good to know she appreciated your picks. Though there were other staff members she only really asked you.

When she missed one week, you found yourself discouraged. One week turned to two and so forth until it had been a month since you saw the woman.

“Y/n, it looks like your regular is back. She might need a little assistance,” one of your coworkers approaches you.

“What are you talking about?”

They give you a look that says ‘seriously’, “Ms. Recommendations, she’s in the non-fiction section looking a little worse for wear.”

You nod and make your way over to the section. There you find Wanda. Your coworker was not exaggerating. She looked so fragile as if she was just waiting for the tears to fall. She was staring at the books, but it was easy to tell that she wasn’t really reading anything.

“Looking for anything in particular,” you say softly, trying not to startle her.

She seems to snap out of her trance enough to try and answer you, “No, not today.”

It felt like she was speaking on autopilot. If it were another guest, you would’ve let her be, but this was Wanda. Perhaps it was a bit para-social but it felt like you knew her better than the average customer.

“I- I don’t mean to overstep, but are you alright?”

She lets out a tired sigh, “That obvious?”

You attempt to back track, “No… uh it’s just I haven’t seen you around in a while."

She looks away for a moment, “ Yeah, I um got a divorce. So I’ve been a hermit as of late.”

“Oh, congratulations.”

Wanda can’t help but laugh at your words, “Most people have been saying they’re sorry to hear, but congratulations? It’s kind of refreshing.”

You shrug, “Well I don’t think divorce is always a bad thing. It’s hard for sure, but it’s better than staying in a situation you don't deserve.”

“What if I was in the wrong?’ Her eyes are glued to the floor as she speaks.

“I may be overstepping again, but I doubt that's the case. You don't seem like the kind of person,” your tone doesn't make her argue, instead a look of relief crosses her face.

“I'm not,” she says taking a deep breath.

You smile at her, “Then it’s their loss.”

She smiles back at you, “I guess you’re right.”

Glad to have made her feel even a little bit better, you begin to leave the aisle she's in. You dint get far before there’s a gentle tug on your wrist. You turn back to stare into Wanda’s warm green eyes.

She’s nervous as she speaks, “I don’t know if I’m too old to be doing this, but fuck it. I could really use a friend right now and I was wondering if you’d be open to getting coffee or something, whenever you’re free.”

You stare at her for a few seconds before nodding, “I’m off in about 15 minutes, there’s a café a few blocks over that I think everyone should try at least once.”

Her excitement builds up in her features. She clears her throat to hide it, “I’ll wait for you by the YA novels?”

“Sounds perfect.”

From that day on Wanda wasn’t just a regular customer anymore, she was your genuine friend. She was also one of the sweetest people you had ever met in your life. She was unbelievably strong too.

The details of her divorce were quite messy. A touch of infidelity here and there, mixed with a custody agreement was a recipe for disaster.

You always offered to be there in any way you can’t for. She usually turns down your more serious offers for help, and sticks to fun small outings. You can tell that she’s somewhat embarrassed by her situation, but you don’t think there’s anything she should be embarrassed about.

“Y/n, I know I said I was free to go out today, but Tommy is sick and Billy isn’t doing that great either, can I give you a rain check?”

She called you and you could hear the tiredness and distress in her voice, “Let me come over and help you, Wands. Two sick kids is rough work, I know you could use a hand.”

She’s silent on the line, but the coughs and sinus filled conversation doesn’t stop.

Wanda sighs, “Okay, do you think you can bring me some medicine? I’ll text you some ingredients I need for soup too if that’s alright?”

“Whatever you need, I’ll see you in a bit,” you say simply.

You follow through on your word picking up various cough, cold, and fever medicines along with some cough drops. You nearly forget about the stuff for the soup, until Wanda texts you something she left off the ingredient list. After picking up everything you head to her house.

You’d been to her house before, but never when her kids were there. You had seen them with her a few times at the library, but back then you didn’t quite deduce that they were her children. It feels so obvious now, but Wanda was definitely a young mom in your opinion, or at least she looked like one.

You rang the doorbell and waited with the groceries in your hand. It took a moment but eventually the door swung open revealing Wanda. Though your hands were full, she’s the one who had bags under her eyes. She looked as though she would fall over any second.

“You’re a godsend Y/n,” she tries to take the bags from your hands but you don’t let her.

“And you’re sick too, here I figured this would happen,” you rummage through the bags and pull out a medicine that’s for adults.

“It’s drowsy.”

You nod, “I know, I figured you need the rest anyway, let me handle its.”

Wanda shakes her head, “Are you crazy? You think you can handle my two kids and me on your own?”

You smile at her, “You underestimate me, Maximoff. Let me show you what I can do.”

“We’ll see, but first come meet them properly.”

You sit the bags down in the kitchen, opting to take the medicine upstairs with you. She takes you to their room.

Tommy is propped up in his bed watching as Billy plays videogames from his spot on the floor.

“Tommy, Billy, this is my friend Y/n. She’s going to help us out today,” Wanda introduces you.

“The library lady,” Billy sounds congested as he speaks.

You nod your head enthusiastically, “ Yep, that’s me. I heard you boys were sick, so I brought some stuff to make you feel better.”

Tommy gags, “Ew medicine.”

You sympathize with him, “Ew is right, but it’s worth it I promise. In fact, I’ll sweeten the deal, you guys take your medicine, and I’ll make you the best soup of your life in return.”

“Better than mom’s?” Billy questions.

“ 1 million times better,” you egg him on.

Tommy is more hesitant, “I don’t know.”

You get closer to him, crouching so you can meet his level, “How about when you’re feeling better, we go out to the arcade and get some ice cream too.”

That seems to be enough for the boy, “That sounds awesome.”

While you’re chatting with them Wanda starts to prepare the medicine cups for the boys. They take the medicine with all the dramatics that children do.

“Ok, we’ll be back to check on you guys, shortly. Billy, get some socks baby. Tommy stay under the covers sweetheart."

The both of you exit the room and head back down the stairs. Wanda moves to start unloading the groceries, but you stop her.

“If you’re not going to fully rest, at least sit. I can make the soup,” you point to the barstools she has in her kitchen.

“Are you sure? I can help-"

You block her from opening the next bag. She looks into your gaze, which holds no feeling of malice or resentment. Instead she finds a warn and tender look behind your eyes.

“I’ve got it.”

She listens to your directions and takes a seat

She watches as you prep the ingredients, ever so often asking where she keeps certain things. Otherwise there is a fluid motion to your movements in the kitchen.

“You know you don't have to take them to the arcade just because they took the medicine, right?”

You pause slightly from chopping vegetables to look up at her, “I probably should’ve asked if it was okay with you first, but I don’t mind taking them. They seem like good kids, which isn’t a surprise at all considering they’re your kids.”

She beams at your words, “They’re a little more docile in this state, but they can be a handful at times. We haven’t really had a big outing like that since the divorce, I’m sure they’d appreciate it.”

“Then consider it done, as soon as they’re better let me know. We can all go out and have some fun.”

Wanda can’t help the feeling she gets hearing you talk so nonchalantly about going out with her kids. It’s something like a spark, that she hasn’t felt in a long time. She takes this time to really look at you, you’re stunning. Truth be told Wanda had always found you a little attractive, but she wrote it off as you just being conventionally good looking. However now, with you standing in her kitchen cooking for her and her kids. She’s starting to think it’s more than that.

“Do you like children, Y/n?”

“I have a soft spot for kids, it’s partially why I chose to work at the library. I had kind of a rough upbringing as a kid. It was just me and my mom, and money wasn’t all that great, but I remember her taking me to almost all the community events they hosted at the library. We spent a lot of time there. When I was old enough to go on my own, it was rare that I didn’t go. The library is such a haven for kids it’s one of my favorite things about it.”

Wanda felt herself melting under the sincerity of your words, “That’s really sweet.”

You start cooking down the vegetables before you answer, “Yeah, if I wasn’t so crazy about the library, I would’ve been a chef. I actually applied to a few culinary schools in high school, pretty ambitious but I had won a few competitions. I had offers and full ride scholarships to some of the best schools out there, but I chose to become a librarian instead.”

Wanda tilts her head to the side playfully, “So you weren’t just talking shit when you said you’re going to make a soup 1 million times better than mine.”

You laugh, “Technically I’m using the ingredients that you told me to get, so it’s more like our soup. I’m just tweaking a few measurements and cooking it a little different. It’s like a group project, if you will.”

Wanda laughs even harder, “You’re so full of shit.”

“Language, there are children present.”

Wanda rolls her eyes, “They’re upstairs."

“Children have super good hearing Wanda, trust me, I’m a librarian.”

She shakes her head with a small chuckle. She watches as the soup comes together a lovely aroma fills the kitchen, her mouth waters at just the smell.

“It smells delicious.”

You motion her over to the stove next to you. She scurries over, which makes you smile. She looks utterly adorable and ethereal at the same time. You began to notice it over the last few times you had hung out. Wanda was simultaneously the cutest and the most beautiful woman, you think you’d ever met in your life

“Taste,” you hold a spoon full of soup up for her.

She hesitates a little, but decides to just eat from the spoon while you hold it. Her eyes close as the flavors dance on her tongue. She lets out an involuntary moan, that has her blushing as soon as it leaves her mouth.

“Oh my god, that’s the best soup I’ve ever had in my life,” Wanda stares at you in awe.

“I hope the boys think so too.”

Wanda helps you fill the bowls for them, “They’re going to love it.”

True to her words the boys devour the soup going as far as to ask for seconds. Neither of you can deny them another bowl. Once they eat, you can see the food working in tandem with the medicine to tucker them out. Before they’re completely out of it you and Wanda get them ready for bed.

It feels more normal than either of you expected. By the time you’re done, both twins are now in bed. The tv plays something at a low volume, but you and Wanda are both aware that the kids will likely be asleep as soon as you leave the room.

When you leave you head back to the kitchen fixing 2 more bowls of soup for Wanda and yourself. You eat amongst each other with small chatter, but it’s comfortable. When you’re done, you almost have to fight Wanda to allow you to do the dishes.

She pouts, once again sitting at the barstool watching you clean.

“You haven’t let me help this whole time,” she whines.

“I’m here to help you, not the other way around,” you remind her.

Wanda places her hands on her hips, “But if you’re doing everything, what am I supposed to do?”

“Just sit there and look pretty,” you say without thinking.

Wanda feels her face heating up, losing track of how many times it has happened today alone, “Look pretty, huh?”

You can feel your ears heating with embarrassment, “oh I- well.”

“Oh my god are your ears turning red, that’s literally adorable. Are you flustered, Y/n?” Wanda teases.

You glare at her with faux-anger, “My ears? Your cheeks are just as red.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about?”

You wash your hands, quickly drying them before approaching her. You keep walking until there is virtually no space between the two of you. You look down at her, you don’t stop your eyes from dropping to her lips.

“Oh really?”

She looks up at you, her cheeks indeed, red like you had mentioned.

“And if they were?”

“Maybe I’d say that it’s adorable,” you use her words against her. “Or maybe…”

“Maybe what?” Her eyes dart to your lips.

You look back into her eyes, “Maybe, I’d kiss you.”

“I’d like that.”

That was all you needed to hear. She met you halfway and, in an instant, you were kissing. Your hand rested on the small of her back, while her hands locked around your neck. It was cliché but it was cute. The kiss itself was respectable, but still filled with a feeling of longing.

Wanda’s hands drop from your neck to lightly push you back, “I’m divorced with two kids Y/n-"

You stop her before she can even rant, “I know, Wanda. I’ve been here, maybe not the whole time, but most of it. I don’t care that you’re divorced and I’d love to get to know your kids. I’d love to get to know you better.”

“I feel like you already know me, Y/n. We’ve been friends for over a year now. We’ve spent so much time together, I’m just surprised you’re not tired of me yet.”

You take her hands in yours, “I could never get tired of you. I’m quite literally asking for more. Let me take you out some time.”

“Are you sure?”

It’s bold, but you place a quick kiss on her lips, “Positive."

From there things just seem to fall into place. You kept your promise to the boys, taking them out when they recovered from their sickness. Wanda was impressed by how well you mingled with them considering her ex always seemed to struggle to relate. However you, had no problem tapping into that childlike like amazement that the kids felt.

Soon after that outing, you and Wanda went on your first real date. You took her out to a nice restaurant. It was an upscale establishment, the prices weren’t even on the menu. Wanda tried to fret about how she didn’t know if she deserved this kind of treatment, but you always reassured her.

You believe she deserved the best and as long as you could give it to her you would.

It only took 4 dates before you asked her to be you girlfriends, not being the best at waiting. Luckily for you she agreed and truth be told if you would’ve asked her on the first date she probably would’ve said yes then.

At this point you’ve been dating for a little over a year. The twins are with their father for the weekend, and Wanda is staying over at your apartment.

The two of you are on the couch. She’s resting in your arms as you watch tv, “Wanda.”

She looks up, “Yes, detka.”

“How attached are you to your house?”

Her eyebrows furrow, “Why?”

You hold her gaze, “Is it crazy if I say that I want us to live together?”

Wanda plays with your fingers, “No, I don't think so.”

You kiss her forehead, “It’s just a thought.”

“You want to buy a house?”

You nod curtly, “We don't have to leave the area, I know the boys have school and I wouldn't want to pull them away or make them start fresh or anything, but I’ve been looking at some homes in the area. Something a little bigger, Billy and Tommy could both have their own room and a huge backyard. Maybe a dog, in the future.”

Wanda cups your face gently, pulling you down to kiss her, “I would love to buy a home with you Y/n.”

“Really?”

Wanda kisses you again, “Really.”

“I love you,” your eyes softening as the words fall from your lips.

“I love you too.”

Your lips are connected again, this time neither of you break the kiss. Instead Wanda shifts in your lap to straddle your waist. Her hands playing with the tiny hairs on the back of your neck. Your hands start at her thigh but end up sliding up to her hips, and soon your fingers are in contact with the cool skin of her stomach.

You aren’t able to stop yourself from kissing down her jaw. She moves her hair and cranes her neck to give you more access. Your teeth sink into her neck only for your tongue to soothe the skin. You suck the spot tenderly, causing little whines to emanate from Wanda.

“Y/n,” your name is breathless on her lips.

She doesn't have to say anything else for you to stand up with her still in your arms. You carry her to the bedroom. Once you’re in there and her feet are on the floor, you pull her shirt off. Yours follows after.

Wanda feels herself getting wet under your gaze. The way you take in her bare chest, eyes blown with want. While you stare she gets rid of the rest of her clothes. You eagerly do the same.

You pull her flush against your body. Skin heating upon contact.

“You’re perfect,” your thumb toys with one of her nipples.

Your head dips to take it into your mouth. You suck lightly, ever so often slowly fanning your tongue over the nipple. You do the same to the other nipple, while your hand cups her warmth. You moan at her wetness.

“ I need you,” she whispers.

You kiss her tenderly, backing her onto the bed. You’re gentle as you ease two fingers into her. She arches her back slightly, and her kiss becomes sloppier.

You’re in no rush as you slowly build pace. Her finger nails dig into your back.

“More please,” she buries her head in your neck.

You begin pumping at a faster pace, using your thumb to stimulate her clit. Her ragged breaths in your ear only turn you on even more.

You jolt as you feel her hand in-between your legs. Her fingers play through your folds and you hear her gasp in your ear.

“All for me baby?”

You nod, “All for you, Wands. Can I taste you, baby?”

“Fuck,” Wanda murmurs.

She pulls her fingers from you, signaling for you to suck them. You take them in your mouth, swirling you tongue around the digits, high off of your own taste.

Once her fingers exit your mouth, you maneuver down her body. You momentarily take your fingers out of her. She doesn’t have time to complain before you’re sucking on her clit.

“Holy shit,” she entangles her hands through your hair.

You keep eye contact with her as you lick, suck, and slurp her pussy. She throws her head back, taking her lip between her teeth. You can see sweat illuminating her body.

Soon you add your fingers back and you can feel her approaching her edge.

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” she keeps repeating the mantra as she reach her peak.

You don’t stop when she cums on your tongue, only slowing your motions, to help her come back down.

“You did so good for me baby,” you say kissing up to her lips.

She shifts so her thigh is against your dripping cunt, “Your turn, my love. Use me.”

You see her flex her thigh, which causes you to moan, “Fuck, Wanda.”

Your hands rest on her shoulder as you begin to grind down on her. Her hands are on you, but the movements are all yours. Wanda watches with blown eyes as you fuck yourself on her thigh. Her hands climb up your sides to massage your breasts. You bite your lip as her fingers play with your nipples.

Wanda sits up slightly, just enough to get her mouth on your body. She sucks on near the top of your breasts, trailing hickeys across.

“I love it when you make a mess on my thigh, cum for me, moya lyubov.”

You cum all over her thigh. Her arms wrap around your midsection holding you steady as you shake. Her head rests against your chest, listening to your wild heart beat return to normal. She places a delicate kiss on your shoulder.

“I love you.”

You kiss the top of her head, “I love you too.”

Once you’re both cleaned up, you settle in bed for the night. You’re start out as the big spoon but soon Wanda turns to face you.

“I was so scared before you came into my life,« she admits.

“Wanda-"

She shakes her head, “Let me finish. I was so lost, I didn't know what to do, if there was anything I could do to feel like myself again. There were so many days I went through thinking I was unlovable. Then you show up, and all of those feelings and thoughts just leave. I’ve never felt so cared for. You make me remember all of the things I love about myself. You make love seem so easy, it feels obvious when you’re with me. I’ve never experienced a love like you’ve given me and I need you to know I love you too. I’ve never felt what I feel for you with anyone else.”

Wanda starts out loud and sure, but by the end her voice is quiet. She doesn’t break eye contact, fighting against her insecurities.

There are no more words shared between the two of you. Wanda kisses you with everything she is feeling and you return her fervor. She pecks you again before burying her head in your chest. You hold her tightly in your arms wondering how you ended up being so lucky.

Her words make emotion swell inside of you. Your voice cracks when you speak, “You are the love of my life. I was doing alright before, but you and the boys are truly everything I’ve been missing in my life. Getting to be with you, a part of your family, it means everything to me Wanda. Thank you, for letting me love you.”

[rawan-soso]

As the adults struggle to find food and keep a roof over everyone’s heads, the children of northern Gaza also have their own struggles. Their mental health is in a horrible state.

I hesitated to talk about this. I don’t want people to think we have so many donations that we can afford to buy my sister toys. It’s not that we can afford it. It’s just that sometimes we have to skip a meal to buy something for her because the boredom is making her even more depressed. She has severe trauma, she has seen bombs dismember people, she has escaped multiple massacres with us. But now the other kids in the building keep breaking her toys while playing and we can't buy a new one immediately, because there are more urgent things. The cheapest thing in northern Gaza right now is makeup, because no one needs it, so I bought some. I apply it on myself and Soso to make her happy, but I don’t always have the energy or time to play with her. I’m exhausted, sick and malnourished, and I still have to do chores and spend hours at the market looking for the most affordable food, clothes, and hopefully medicine.

We have many expenses that we don’t talk about because people won’t see them as vital. Phone chargers (only used ones that die fast, because new ones are insanely expensive). A fee for the neighbors who have the internet router. Phone bills and data. Toys for the children. School books and private tutors for students.

You’re right, it wouldn’t be vital if the war had only lasted for a week. But it’s been more than a year. Our children’s mental health is destroyed, especially children as young as Soso who is only 4 years old and whose brain is developing in a genocide. Students can’t just stop studying for all this time. My other sister missed her entire last year of high school, but she wants to take university entrance exams. Dropping out of university because of the war has killed everything in me. I can’t let her experience the same kind of loss, so I pay for her books, for paper and printing, for private tutoring classes.

I had to buy three phone chargers in a month. The first one was $70. Days later, it was $100. Two days ago, a neighbor fried the second charger, and the new one was $200. I cried that day, because it wasn't even my fault. The prices of everything keep going up and I feel like I’m going insane. Even our landlord tried to increase the rent. It’s okay if I sacrifice meals. I’m used to hunger. But I have three younger siblings and I can’t watch them lose even more than they already have. I want them to study and play. I want them to eat and stay warm.

Please help me. When all of this is over, I’ll get my degree, find a good job, and I’ll never ask for anything again. But as long as the war keeps going, I need your help. I promise your donations don’t go to waste. Food and rent will always be the priority. Soso and my grandmother are the first beneficiaries. We always think carefully before buying anything. I hope we can reach the final goal soon, and that it will cover all expenses until the war ends, because I’m so tired of relying on strangers. I hate asking for money. I’m eternally grateful to anyone who helps, but the guilt won’t fade, because I wanted to be an independent girl and help my family myself. I'm exhausted and depressed.

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[feathery-dreamer]

They're unappreciative because group trips are some of the most mind-numbingly boring and/or anxiety-inducing events ever.

You're in a crowded and noisy place, supervised by a teacher who's sick of being underpaid and underrated. There's a strict rule to stay together, you must keep up; can't take time to admire the items and read labels. You're shown the piece, told what it is or means, and move on without forming any ideas and feelings of your own. Oh sure, there can be a "guided" tour ending in a Q&A session, but the guide is on a tight schedule so that doesn't improve much.

Those are just three things I can list off the top of my head. That's not an educational event, it's emotional torment that makes you wish you'd swallowed some chalk that morning.

If they went with friends, with someone's cool uncle or a passionate expert, someone who can make learning fun; they'd be more eager. If they could remain together because they liked it, could read the descriptions to each other and share opinions; they would.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for schools providing the kids with opportunities to see "the real thing" whenever they can. I'm just saying, a lot of the stuff that makes classrooms human-unfriendly also follows the group on a school trip.

free museum trips are wasted on unappreciative middle schoolers. let me go

[ranger-kellyn]

this whole "getting better" thing fucking BLOWS. what do you MEAN i have to stick to this whole thing of exercising basically daily, spending at least an hour across the day doing stretches and yoga, eating at minimum three meals, stay away from social media, and dedicating at minimum 20 minutes to journaling every single fucking day. what do you MEAN if i start slacking on EVEN ONE of them, it dominoes until i'm right back in "i'd rather be dead" headspace.............................

[lesbian-moon-gf]

surviving the current age of internet means saying no to subscriptions and premiums for basic features. you must endure the inconvenience of not being able to use every server emoji in discord. you must build the patience to find alternatives like NewPipe so you can listen to music on youtube while your phone screen sleeps. do Not give these corporations your limited disposable income. tiktok not letting me view videos on my phone without downloading the app? i will outlast tiktok and the execs will be remembered as dull,disgusting capitalists. listen to me, listen to me. if you do not know how to pirate shows from hulu, learn. if you can't pirate it, it is not worth the money to rent it. please i'm on my hands and knees. do not accept this form of internet.

[mugiwara-lucy]

With Kamala/Walz going up DAILY, I've seen more people talking about voting third party/Jill Stein (EW) and I believe the above screencaps from @three--rings can explain WHY Third Party votes NEVER work NOR is this the election to screw around in.

Everyone....like she says above.....PLEASE LEARN FROM HISTORY!!!

(Because if Trump gets in, he's NEVER LEAVING).

[fandomsbecausewhynot]

Same, I'm sick of my only interactions being bots

this whole mutual thing is overhyped on this site. want to send me an ask off anon? do it. want to tag me in a post? do it. follower, mutual, or just random person who stumbled across my blog: I crave interaction and literally do not mind.

[perrieedwards]

i feel like people are skimming over the uk riots in a way that makes me want to tear my hair out. muslims in the uk are in active danger. immigrants in the uk are in active danger. refugees in the uk are in active danger. people of colour in the uk are in active danger. asian communities in the uk are in active danger. black communities in the uk are in active danger.

there are massive far right riots throughout the country right now and people like fucking elon musk and nigel farage are inciting it and still have a platform to speak. people have used three young girls deaths, people's genuine grief in southport, to try and gain traction for their own racist bullshit and it's working.

a lot of refugee charities have been forced to close leaving many people without support, homes, funding, food, etc. if you aren't able to donate please consider sending a message via the conversation over borders campaign! it will send a hopeful, welcoming letter to a refugee in the uk. there is also a guide to staying safe here.

please do your own research and donate to refugee charities, anti-islamophobia charities, mosques who are trying to rebuild after being destroyed, counter protesters, here are some i've heard positive things about but the list is extensive; southport strong together (support for the southport victims and their families), southport mosque rebuilding, riot repair fund, middlesbrough vulnerable residents, nasir mosque rebuilding, hull help for refugees, bristol welcomes migrants,

[symphonyofsilence]

Let the poor man rest.