#i was afraid of everything

[marplediscopuchine]

Dreams of luxury from the noughties.

[hoofpeet]

14 year old artists listen to me right now (gripping you by the shoulders) STOP caring about your "internet presence" right naow. Draw slower and stop trying to boil your art down to an acceptable marketable brand

[vinnybox]

Player progression

[turtletoria]

the krampus incident from the book of bill if it was out of character and stupid

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

anyone else have multiple traumatic memories associated specifically with holidays/family vacations? because that is a topic I never see discussed in all the So You Had A Shitty Childhood, Now What? self-help books i've been reading. but for me, it was a significant thing. and the more i think about it the more it seems like this would be an (unfortunately) common experience. would be grateful to hear if this matches other peoples' experiences...

[ask-the-pioneer]

you're a good kiddo

[vegan-kaktus]

EA's leaves are kind of dull, and I personally think TNW's are too bright, so here's my spin on a leaf default + a new mod :-D

Leaf variety mod

There are 4 different leaf textures in the game files but only one is used. I talked with @shastakiss some years(?) ago and she mentioned an unfinished mod Neder started working on to make the leaf use different textures. Unfortunately, Neder couldn't get it to work. Shasta kindly sent me said mod and I handed it over to @lamare-sims last year who of course managed to fix it (thank you so much once again, you're a legend!!)

Note #1: worth mentioning, this mod will only affect leaves that spawn after you've installed the mod! the same goes for my mesh fix included in the default below. Note #2: if you already have this mod in you dl-folder, delete that file and use the one from this download if you're planning on using my default (otherwise my uv-map and texture edit will not work).

Defaults

Replaces all 4 leaf-textures with new, more colorful and less blocky textures. I also edited the "effect"-textures of single leaves (the ones falling from the trees). This default can be used without the mod mentioned above, but then only the "original" texture will be used - see second image.

The leaves that spawns under the tree (the one sims can't rake), it was impossible to make it look good with any of the four textures, so I re-mapped it and gave it it's own texture (256x256px). There's also an optional default for the rake included, I edited a tiny error in the mesh and gave it a texture makeover. I made a separate LOD90-default for the leafpile (meaning: the mesh in neighborhood view) and instead of replacing the textures I repo'd them, meaning that the LOD90 default works with any leaf texture default you might use (it will only be showing one texture in neighborhood view).

Texture sizes are all the same as EA's:

Leaves: 512x512px x4 (my default +1: 256x256px)

Rake: 128x256px

Leaf effects: 32x32px x3

Edited leaf-related cc

I edited Sophie-David's leaf pile pet bed (the mesh) and repo'd it to leafpile_txtr, meaning the mesh will now pick up my default (or any other default you might have for leafpile_txtr, and if none - EA's original texture). The mesh now needs seasons + pets, since it's repo'd. Their recolors are not included, so be sure to download them from the link above if you want them and replace their mesh with mine!

I also edited Shakeshaft's leaf cover mesh (warning T$R) , I repo'd it to one of the leaf textures and made recolors - also repo'd - to the rest of the textures. This mesh and recs now need seasons, this also means that the mesh and recolors* can be used without my default.

*with the exception of rc4, which is repo'd to my custom leaf texture, found in my leaf default.

Recommended mod

I recommend simler90's Gardening Rake Leaf Pile Mod or jfade's leaf pile fix (I have no idea what the difference between those two mods are, they edit the same thing so choose one of them).

Nothing in this download is dependent on each other* so feel free to pick and choose what you want :-) remember you can only have one default for the leaves, meaning that if you have any other default (1, 2, 3, 4) or Shakeshaft's/Sophie-David's original meshes, make sure you remove them before installing my files. Everything has been compressed to reduce file size, as usual. Do let me know if I messed up anywhere!

*with the exception of rc4, see above.

DOWNLOAD: SFS | MTS

Credits: Neder, @lamare-sims (many many thanks!!), @shastakiss, Sophie-David, Shakeshaft and lasty EA.

[teaboot]

tranny freak :)

[tazmiilly]

thinking again about that "curse the fate that brought me here" line they just threw in the journal.

considering ford had felt so drawn to the town because of its weird and unique qualities, he had attached a sense of connection to it with himself. for so many years he had felt like it was a place of sanctuary where he could be the scientist and the man he wanted to be. to now view that fate as something to be regretted is so heartbreaking. he no longer feels that safety and that happiness he felt being there. in the time that he was quickly losing his mind, he probably felt like all the amazing things he once enjoyed were a illusion for something else. something really awful that ford unintentionally had a hand in. the town is no longer the place he finds a sanctuary in. it's actively trying to kill him. and we can imply he's saying that, in that very moment, he wish he never came.

[housederiva]

I understand the companions are important but what about Rook? As much as we need to support uplift the companions, do we get the same in turn? Or are we just a soundboard who’s only there to act as a judge and make decisions. Do we get checked in on by our companions? Do we matter to them as much they’re supposed to matter to us?

Does Rook have their own life and fears and concerns outside of stopping the A plot? ‘Rook is there because they want to be. They’re the leader because they chose to be.’ Do we get to find out why?

[vaguely-concerned]

To the ‘themes I am picking up on in Veilguard’ list, let's go ahead and add what I have a sneaking suspicion will actually turn out to be The theme:

— the world has changed and can never be as it was again.

— I have been changed and can never be who I was again.

— in this simple unavoidable truth there is endless grief and endless hope.

And I… may be getting a bit emotional about it haha. Let me show my work a bit: 

if da:o is a game about people who are already dead or half ghosts in some form (through societal forces, psychologically, functionally, literally, in body, through the joining etc.) coming together anyway to save the world from being swallowed by total nihilism and despair (symbolized by the blight) through the power of love and friendship and also this sword/potential heroic sacrifice that I found, da2 is a game about people who have lost their homes and been set adrift finding and building new homes in each other (while completely failing to save the world. also through the power of love and friendship. as well as years of petty bickering <3 we must imagine kirkwall if not happy then worth having been because the love was there the love was there and that's the only sanctifying force we can ever have in this doomed world and city of ours), and da:i is a game about old stabilizing-but-unjust comfortable lies vs. disruptive but potentially liberating uncomfortable truths, and the power of friendship to help us distinguish the one from the other and navigate through them...

folks… I'm starting to think that veilguard might be a game specifically about moving towards recovery and acceptance after trauma — about how even in this flawed, severed, scarred state, what is here right now is worth loving and worth caring for. even in an imperfect and impermanent world and self, there is worth and joy. and of course the first real tragedy — and threat — of Solas is that he just cannot find it in himself to accept this and move on, to let go of what was, the regret won’t let him go or he won’t let go of it. which means that even though on the surface it’s Elgar’nan and Ghilan’nain (and the will to subjugate and violate they represent) who are the main villains, the real antagonistic force in this story beneath that is the Dread Wolf’s despair. A despair Rook must make an answer to by the end of the game, one way or another, compassionately or with righteous fury, triumphant or pyrrhic.

The world will change again and again and so will you — BUT the crucial element is that so will everyone else who exists along with you, you are fundamentally not alone in this existential truth. all we’ll ever have is each other and my god that is plenty, my god that is enough!!! Which is the second thing Solas just can’t accept, he keeps himself separate and completely alone out of an awful mix of fear and pride and feeling himself unworthy of anything else. Rook and the player want to save the world of Thedas because it’s where everyone we love lives, Solas wants to go back to the past because that’s the only neighbourhood where he can still visit those he loved — and the person he himself was, before. A very sympathetic and human instinct/trap to fall into when touched by trauma, I think, if only it wasn’t backed by godlike power, a fundamentally oppositional personality, and a catastrophic lack of therapy to make it literally everyone else’s problem too lol. It’s varric and solas’ banter about the man on the island and where meaning in a life comes from all over again, writ large and with detail work — and the added idea of ‘what if there are also other islands out there, though. With other people on them that you could find if you reach for each other’. Rook with the best of intentions has to make choices to which there are no perfect outcomes and live with what happens — and not cut themselves off from everyone else around them even when there is regret or shame. You get back up every day and you make a life with other people doing the same and you do your best, and that’s the only victory this world will give you. In the end, that is more than enough, that is essential. And I um. I love that. So much. It’s why some of the writing clumsiness on top can’t hurt me because this thematic spine is so solid and so beautiful to me. It’s DA2 all over again that way for me personally — I forgive this story for what it isn’t and couldn’t be, and I love it with my whole stupid open heart for what it actually is. Thank you for coming to my TED-talk and goodbye etc.      

(For my fellow TLT heads out there — you know what this story is reminding me of most of all, actually? It has some big Nona the Ninth vibes down there in the deep. It’s about… the horror and unspeakable beauty that can only be found in liminality, and the role of love in making that basic fact of existence bearable. And also even more unbearable at the same time. I'm so sorry.)

[sorrelpaws]

weird blue girls

[fear-no-mort]

favourite thing: his new habit of saying uhuh/mhm and also this

[claraoswalds]

It's racist, my dear, to be blunt. People come from outside, they think we're all witches and druids. For God's sake, child, you walked into a piece of string!

[jrueships]

HE IS SO CUTE !!!!!! i love love LOVE when ppl can do what they love and make success out of it and STILL love what they do like !! cuutee!!!!!

[fluentisonus]

speaking of wounds sometimes I see posts on here that are like "discussion/depiction of wounds is more about metaphorical intimacy nobody means they're literally erotic" like no they're sexual actually. to me.