#i still dont know why i dont deserve the chance | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dimeadozencows · 1 year ago

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There are a lot of great tags on this post, and a lot of different and unique takes on gaster which i always love to read :DD but i dont think i managed to evoke what i wanted to with this drawing

We know that gasters aware hes in a video game, but so many characters in undertale are aware of that already. One of the things that make gasters situation different is his ability to look at our world directly. He's aware that we've been looking for him and trying to understand what and who he is, he knows these last few years were dogshit for everyone on earth and mentions it in his pre chapter 2 tweets, he knows our life outside of our tempering with these worlds

And unlike other self aware characters in undertale, he doesn't experience time and the resets. He "lives" outside of what we can control. He truly remembers all that we've done while being unaffected by any of it. So while other self aware characters (im mainly thinking of sans and flowey) know that theres a person behind frisk whos controlling time, they're affected by our choices and (for the most part) can't judge it from an outside perspective

Sans is mostly unaffected by our inputs, and he does manage to judge us in a very impactful way, but he can't be a completely uninvolved judge. He will (understandably) react to us killing his brother and on certain neutral endings, as much as hes trying to hold his unfazed facade together, he's struggling with the thought of how much of his happiness you took away, even if he knows a reset will likely happen and everything will go back to the way it was. Understandably! This game is his world. Even if he knows its just a game that gets reset its still his home and the people he loves are its residents. He can't be unfazed by everything. he is nice to us when we're nice to him, and he hates our guts when we give him reason to. And he will always forget us after a reset and react to our actions only on the current run, not being able to know who we were to him before.

And flowey acts as the embodiment of this games message, he is our mirror and, in his words, he is who we will become if we exhaust this game of all it has. He exists to judge us, but he can do so only from his own point of view. He's judging our actions, our choices in this world as if we we're stuck inside it the way he is, which we aren't. That's not to say his judgement isn't impactful, that would just be. incorrect to say lol. But he can't interpret what he sees us do in a fully unbiased way because he's in a very similar, but not identical, situation to us. While we can enter his world and play the kind way, we do get bored and try new things, like picking the other, more rude dialogue option, or killing a character to see what a person who loves them says. even if we don't fully want to. Just like he said! But while we both went through the same process, there's a difference between us. We can leave. We don't have to grow apathetic and detached from these characters. We don't have to start seeing them less as people and more as repetitive lines of dialogue. If we're bored, we can leave. Play a new game. Come back when we miss them and see those familiar lines of dialogue and feel nostalgia, not dread. And he knows that we're a person that has a life outside of this game. At the end of pacifist he desperately tries to make us stay. But he doesn't see what our life is like, he cant see what we do with our days outside of his world, so he can only see us leave and return and leave and return, and judge us through his (flawed) world view and based on our actions within a world we enter for fun.

Thats not to say they're not written well? They're the fucking coolest flowey and sans rule.(i think the info dump proves my stance on them) I'm just saying that even if they know about us they cant fully judge the situation from a neutral point of view because they have a limited world view and they're affected by our choices, which gaster (as of now) isn't

And we don't know a lot about him. But we do know that he knows hes in a video game, that he knows we control his world and its linear time, that he lives outside of that linear time and is unaffected by our inputs, that he used to experience time linearly before shattering, that he had people he cared about in undertale, that he saw everything all of us did when playing undertale, that he is kind to us in the current deltarune chapters, that he knows of our lives and what we go through, and most importantly in my opinion, he knows that we (fans of utdr) use fiction as escapism

We've had characters judge us and berate us for our misdeeds, who are fully justified in doing so since we did hurt them directly. But they also cannot see the situation from an outside perspective. No character in undertale sees us separated from their world, as a person who lives a life outside of tempering with undertale, to them we are just a god who takes control of their reality, all they see is a cruel person who entered a world just to destroy it, or give everyone freedom and then just take it away in a second, they don't see how small their world is in comparison to ours, they'll never be able to understand that our actions in their world are (for the most part) inconsequential to us. they cant see us beyond the red soul.

so imagine with me for a second, a character within the game who is not only aware of the fact that he's in a game and that there's a player who controls time, but who also has the ability to SEE the players' lives through the internet. A character who has the ability to see the horrors of everyday real life and how much people struggle with it, and see that some deal with those struggles using fiction. And not just any fiction, the fiction that the character itself lives in. A character who knows that these great beings, much bigger than him, use the thought of him and his world to get through the trials and tribulations of their lives, hardships that are horrific in completely different ways than his world ever had. A character who knows that they find comfort indulging in his world and finding everything it has to offer, because whatever his world has is much more pleasant than theirs.

He knows that to us his world is just a video game, one that remembers and we're not above consequences in, but still a video game. One of the most common complaints i hear about UT is that it is preachy in its message, and players shouldn't be berated by it for playing certain routes or making certain choices (but one of the points of the game was that there is an alternative way to complete it so why choose violence BUT that is a whole conversation in it of itself and this is long enough already)

So what if the game understood? What if the character who created this game, this world, knew that it is just a game and didn't judge the player? What if the character accepted that he is only fiction and saw the beauty and purpose within it, and how he can use his position in this situation to connect with us and allow us to escape our hurt for just a little while? What if he saw the hardships we've endured and empathised with us? What if he understood that we don't view his world as real like he does and we just use it for our fun, to escape, the way a child happily plays with a toy? What if he felt for us, and encouraged it?

Deltarune (initially) not having a way to really hurt and kill people makes me think that while gaster wanted us in this world for whatever his larger goal is, and wanted us to indulge in it, he didn't want us to hurt anyone. But he saw what we did with the previous world and knows that warnings, consequences and the visible and audible hurt of the characters won't stop us (in fact, it will encourage us), which is something he accepts and understands. it's said that his own curiosity brought him far in his endeavours so perhaps he even understands our curiosity and why we just have to see what would happen, as morbid as it is in universe

But i love that we (without the help of noelle, a game breaking pro) cannot kill anyone. He didn't even give us that option. He isn't completely detached from these worlds since he used to live within them. He still views the fictional characters in the game as real while also knowing us, our lives, and the way we interact with the characters. And he loves and cares for both.

Letting us escape into a nicer world while keeping the residents of it safe from us.

And that is of course assuming he isn't tricking us into a false sense of security to teach us a lesson, and isn't lying to our faces every time he talks to us kindly and thanks us. but i think that after an entire game and a whole cast of characters who taught us lessons and took control away from us and showed us what an asshole we are for playing the game in an unkind way.. i think it'll be a really nice thing and a breath of fresh air to have a character who knows what they and their world are to us on a realistic scale, see why we sometimes act so detached from its ways, and understand that yeah, it is just a game. And we do the things we do as a means to escape. And that it isn't necessarily a bad thing to interact with games in this way (to me that sounds like the most self aware character ever written). But also see the characters within it as real (since he used to be amongst them) and protect them from our worst.

Truly and wholeheartedly loving and caring for both his family and the person who barely hesitates to strip them of all their joy before murdering them too.

Kissing the hands of the man who killed his son

I have endured what no one on earth has ever done before

I put my lips to the hands of the man who killed my son

#and the original caption is a direct quote #but i love the thought of him analyzing and judging his own worldview and the stance he took on his and his peoples' situations #thinking about how morbid it is that he is empathising and enjoying the company of the people who kill everyone he loves #but still not being able not to #but that↑ is too much fanon interpretation for this accidental character analysis #not even sure anyone will see/read this lol. but i love this guy. i think of him often. i think he has a lot of love in his heart.#parts of this do feel a bit repetitive. srry about that sgsjdj. also sorry about any grammatical errors English sucks muchly #also this is a very VERY surface level reading of undertales message and meta narrative and sans' and floweys characters-#please don't judge my analysis abilities based on this i just wanted to rant about my feelings and emotions and thoughts about #the silly wingding man and why i used a priam quote in a drawing of him #he broke the cycle of hurt #thinking about it i probably should've talked about the original story here. but I don't know it that well and #i don't wanna spread misinformation. also i forgot.#ALSO they way i refered to and interpreted the utdr community is extremely generalising- most of us are weenies and pick the nice dialogue #options every time we play and we dont kill anybody. hell im one of the people who have a hard time replaying ut after completing pacifist.#but generally the community has played no mercy and killed for no reason and exhausted the game of all its got-#thats what the characters see so thats what i wrote them reacting to #(I keep adding more tags while trying to fall asleep) ALSO. gaster could be treating us the same way papyrus does on a no mercy run #papyrus sees us heading down a dangerous path and instead of warning us or threatening us or fighting us he offers us a chance to stop it #showing us kindness when we don't deserve it. (imo its one of if not the most impactful moment of the no mercy route on a meta level)#papyrus doesn't know our lives outside of this. he doesn't know that we do this for fun- to escape unpleasant things in our life. he sees #our actions in his world outside of context and still offers us his mercy (he is the greatest character of all time #AND thats how WE treat the violent characters in our path on a pacifist route) pap does this without the context! so imagine if he had it!#he'd understand even more. thats where i think gaster stands #anyways #dadster 4everrrrrrrrrrrr #infodump

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what-is-this-bakwaas · 2 years ago

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#i need to let out some stuff #since i can't and DO NOT want to speak to this person #i'll just write them everything I want to say to them #first of all are you okay like genuinely okay #idk why i wonder if you're doing okay even tho you made me feel like complete shit #just wanna know if you're okay #i think about you way too much it annoys me #you tend to keep a lot to yourself and your mind is all over the place but i hope you know that everything will work out in the end #dont be too hard on yourself please #and good things are coming #your past has been difficult and painful but i promise not everyone is here to hurt you. if only you give a chance to good things #are you still starting that new program in fall #even tho you're a fucking rat i still wish you succeed in whatever you do #do you know i pray for you? i keep you in my duas bc i dont want to keep this hatred for u in my heart. i dont want to feel anything for u #how are you processing your reconnection with your dad?#i know you say you don't feel anything but that shit is still heavy. i hope you're able to get the answers you're looking for #i hope you find some peace from it and that you get some type of closure #are your friends still the same shitty assholes #you lowkey deserve better and i hope you find an environment that will help you actually grow #and become a way better person cause i know you have so much potential. you're just with the wrong crowd #match your words with your actions. you'll get very far in life #i find ways to talk about you. mostly negative but i just keep mentioning you bc i miss u. and i hate this. i dont want to miss u #i hate you and at the same time i don't #i hope you leave my mind very soon #i still don't understand why you acted the way you did and if u even feel bad for hurting me

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carrotpiss · 2 years ago

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An attempt to get some thoughts feelings out of my system re the failed date

#genuinely embarrassed i still feel so upset about it again just a new wave of anxiety hit me this morning #i just feel so lost at how it ended up like that i thought i communicated clearly but obviously i didnt i said mid afternoon i let them know #when j was leaving like mid-afternoon literally is 3pm but maybe i shouldve just said yrah ill be around at half 3ish #and then they just left me waiting with no actual eta just repeated “not long now” for 2 hours #and then in the last 30mins were loke btw bunch of their friends joining eho dont have tix #and its like.. okay? atp ive been waiting so long it felt like i had to agree and its not like i object to others being there a bit #like we're primarily going to a gig nesr where thejr mates live i expect that i just wasnt expecting to get completely sidelined #and its like they were flirting with me all up until i said i was omw #i forgot it even was a date at one point until they themslef mentioned they were on a date w me to someone else #like i just dont understand what happened #like where did i go wrong #crouch speaks #i know the answer but still #i got hopeful. the one thing i shouldn't be. i for a moment thought we had a chance #and so life had to humble me bc i got thinking about thjngs i dont deserve and will never have bc im fundamentally broken and horrid and #unlovable and hideous #like idk why i thought this would result any differently #now i feel guilty and rotten #like fuck was i expecting too much was i been too dramatic to just have a bit of alone time with them just to het to know them a bit better #i dont know i dont know how this is supposed to work

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maplesyrupsainz · 4 months ago

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˖⁺｡˚⋆˙new fav wag | LS2˖⁺｡˚⋆˙

pairing: logan sargeant x williams social media admin!reader y/n (she/her)

genre: social media au

warnings: none jus fluff

summary: in which the internet knows you're in love before you do

a/n: I STARTED WRITING THIS BEFORE THE NEWS DROPPED SO LET'S JUST PRETEND NOTHING HAPPENED FOR NOW IM SO SORRY

request!!!: logan fic or smau where the reader is williams’ newest social media admin?? and logan immediately is crushing on her, and the fans are trying to speculate why logan is suddenly so smiley in a bunch of the clips and videos posted on the williams ig or doing a bunch of challenges on the williams tiktok page (and alex is totally laughing his ass off)

my masterlist

fc: annie.shr

twitter ->

instagram ->

yourusername

liked by logansargeant, yourbff, and others

yourusername bits & bobs 🫶

view all comments

user7 omg? how is she so gorgeous

user8 oh the garage pic lol so she's 100% the right girl

user9 wish i was her omg

user10 omgg. i'd be happy looking at her too 👀

user11 real. can u blame logan lollll

lilymhe prettiest girl!!

yourusername ilysm <3

yourbff im kissing you rn

yourusername i wish!!

user12 does she have a bf? second pic

user13 no one knows lol

user14 logan found dead

user15 logan in the likes too hehe he's down bad

user16 can u blame him

lilyzneimer miss you babe

yourusername miss u sm

user17 omgg she's friends w lily?!!

twitter ->

messages ->

instagram ->

yourusername posted a story

liked by lilymhe, logansargeant, and others

yourbff YESSSS got you all to myself

yourusername hmm, almost

yourbff boo party pooper

lilymhe wow

yourusername oh stop it you

user23 omg ruff ruff ruff ....

user24 so stunning omg

user25 i wish i was u

user26 logan found dead

logansargeant cant wait to relax a bit!

yourusername well deserved 🩵!

logansargeant thanks :) would love to hang out sometime if your free?

yourusername for sure i could find some time!

logansargeant awesome!

yourusername posted a story

liked by yourbff, lilyzneimer, and others

user27 WOWWWW

user28 omg she's gorgeous

user29 wow wow wow

lilymhe omg wow. williams admin off duty is 🔥🔥🔥

yourusername HAHAH stop!!

yourbff meeeeowwww!!!!!

liked by yourusername

logansargeant wow. any chance we could turn that hang out into a date instead? 👀

yourusername HAHAH LOGAN

logansargeant ...well?

yourusername oh wow ur serious. well yes of course

logansargeant cool, cant wait.

twitter ->

messages ->

interview ->

transcript -> y/n (behind the camera): so how was your guys’ two weeks off? logan: good! the rest was really needed for me, and you, alex? alex: well, we can focus on you for a minute still, or both of you actually! *laughs* y/n: haha very funny alex, i dont think people want to hear about my break though

twitter ->

*accidentally messed up the user numbers lol but who rly cares*

instagram ->

logansargeant

liked by oscarpiastri, alex_albon, and others

logansargeant lil update

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user39 second pic?????

user40 HELLOOOO

user41 soft launch...? 👀

user42 love when he hangs out w alex omg <3

user43 love youuu logan

user44 this is sooo bf

alex_albon my guyyy

liked by logansargeant

oscarpiastri great race this weekend 🤟

logansargeant 🔥

user45 there's no way the 3rd pic was logan alone

user46 legit it's too girly

user47 y/n was here? 👀

liked by alex_albon

user48 HAHA alex liking this comment 😭

user49 lol he ships them so hard

williamsracing love the first pic 😎

liked by logansargeant

user50 no rizz

user51 she's a professional let her live x

yourusername posted a story

liked by lilymhe, yourbff, and others

user52 OH MY GODDDD

user53 this is so logan

lilymhe why are you gatekeeping information from us

yourusername !!!!! dramatic. all in good time

user54 omg obsessed with this lil date

user55 love this sm

user56 soulmates a bit 👀

yourbff text us BACKKKK

liked by yourusername

messages ->

instagram ->

lilymhe posted a story

liked by alex_albon, lilyzneimer, and others

alex_albon just look at them!

lilymhe oh new love 🥰

oscarpiastri they gonna be mad at this

liked by lilymhe

user57 god.

user58 ME WHEN

user59 y/n & logan fr.

user69 confirmed much?

user70 if no one else got us i know lily muni he got us

liked by lilymhe

yourusername 📍 miami

liked by logansargeant, lilyzneimer, and others

yourusername usa usa usa usa usa usa usa usa

view all comments

user71 GIRL WE KNOW UR DATING

user72 obsessed with everything about this.

user73 on god i love them

user74 she's just too beautiful

yourbff i love u so much

yourusername love u w my whole entire heart 💓

user75 the second omg yeehaw much

logansargeant 🇺🇸

liked by yourusername

user76 okay.

user77 you alr know he was fighting back the urge to profess his love for her

user78 he looks so good in the third pic omg

user79 hottest blondies in the world fr

lilyzneimer out of this world beauty!!

yourusername dont be silly you angel

lilyzneimer 💓💓💓

twitter ->

instagram ->

f1wagupdates posted a story

liked by yourbff, lilymhe, and others

user83 NO. WAY.

user84 OH MY GOD FINALLY

user85 finally some proof

user86 ahh not them being caught red handed 😭

user87 obsessed w them omg

user88 CUTIESSS AHH

messages ->

instagram ->

logansargeant posted a story

liked by yourusername, yourbff, and others

user89 LOGOATTTT

user90 omg points & hard launch all in one weekend i feel dizzy

oscarpiastri eventful weekend for you!

logansargeant 🤔 just a bit

oscarpiastri congrats you deserve it 💙

user91 HARD LAUNCHHHH

user92 y/n lucky charm fr fr fr

user93 u will alwaysss be famous

user94 LOGOAT IN THE POINTS

user95 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

user96 🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅

yourusername

liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, and others

yourusername okay fine have the hard launch!! 🥰

view all comments

user97 what a rollercoaster it's been

user98 SO HONOURED TO HAVE BEEN APART OF THIS JOURNEY

user99 how did he do it fr

user100 literally. spill the secrets logan

lilyzneimer most gorgeous couple!!!

yourusername no u xxxx

lilymhe pair of stunners

yourusername ly <333

yourbff MY ANGELLL ILYSM

yourusername love you love you love you!!!

alex_albon wow finally. i was in the trenches for a minute there

yourusername dramatic much? 🤨

alex_albon no? why?

logansargeant no comment from me

user101 oh to be in their gc

user102 too beautiful

user103 wow thts williams admin fr...

logansargeant new fav wag!

yourusername 🤨🤨🤨🤨

logansargeant lol! i love you

yourusername love you unreal amounts 🥹

THE END 🩵

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catsukkii · 21 days ago

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HI ATHENA!!! ok so i was wondering if u can do smth with drummer bakugo heh. id like that a lot!!! pls and thank u

hai i love the way ur brain works im READY!

drummer!bakugo who makes sure to bring you up in every interview, or quite frankly any chance he gets. hes grossed out at the thought he has fangirls when you’re all he wants.

“they have no chance, I dont know why those weirdos are still all over me.”

drummer!bakugo who totally shows off extra when your around for practice, unintentionally (intentionally) drowning all the other members out, hes definitely gotten yelled at by everyone more then a few times.

drummer!bakugo who runs to you after every show, completely ditching the band as they’re all celebrating another successful night.

“they can celebrate themselves, lets go home. now.”

drummer!bakugo who makes you write your initial in sharpie on his drumsticks, he claims its ‘good luck’ and makes sure to kiss the wooden sticks on stage before every show.

drummer!bakugo who acts like he hates your praise whenever he plays for you, but cant seem to hide the blush that creeps onto his face nonetheless.

drummer!bakugo who always ends up dripping in sweat after every show, unfortunately the way the colorful lights shine over his sweaty body is something you cant quite look away from.

drummer!bakugo who attempts to get you to try out the drums, and immediately regrets his decision when he hears the loud noises that don't clash nicely together at all. (he’s such a perfectionist its absolutely killing him but he loves you so he politely grabs the sticks out of your hands and ushers you to sit back down.)

however,

if you do play an instrument of any sort he’s learning songs to play together and may pull some strings to get you to play at a few shows with the band.

adding on to that, drummer!bakugo who’s insanely proud when you learn a new song and show him, he's also drooling at the sight of you playing even if its as something as stupid as the flute. (apologies flute players.)

drummer!bakugo who better not see a fan being mean to you online or in person because he does not play, immediately firing back insults. (much to his PR teams dismay.) don't even get him started on if its someone talking about how you ‘don't deserve him’ because he will tweet back about their own looks…

drummer!bakugo who refuses to get you front seat tickets, not because he doesn't want you to watch, but because he refuses to make you sit with all the other fans, especially in their more crowded arenas. Instead, he makes you watch from the curtain, definitely sending you a wink when he gets the chance. (maybe blowing a kiss if you’re really lucky.)

a/n; wrote this as an au where he’s in a band and I can’t stop won’t stop 🔥🔥

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