#i might even watch it next week!
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pynkhues · 4 months ago
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Sophie, have you watched Kaos? I just watched a couple episodes and it's so so clever, I'm really enjoying how they translate all the Greek mythology to this kind of fantastical contemporary world. And it has Janet McTeer.
I haven't! I hadn't even heard of it, anon, but that sounds really fun. I'll add it to my list.
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a-writing-otter · 3 months ago
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WIP Wednesday - Chapter 6 of The Redemption and Subsequent Death of Bill Cipher
“Am I— Did I interrupt something?” Stan asks a little awkwardly.
“Nah,” Bill, who recovers much faster from gaping at Stan like a fish, leans back into the bench before punching Pine Tree’s shoulder. “Kid was just heading out to go break windows or something.”
“Better hope it’s not these windows or [you’re] cleaning it up,” Stan tells Bill before reaching out, shoving the bill of Pine Tree’s hat down over his eyes. Pine Tree grumbles and fixes it before turning a far brighter smile on Stan.
“Your sister’s looking for you. Something about trying to make a suit out of glitter.”
“Oh. Great.” Pine Tree rubs his face and gets to his feet. “Thanks, Grunkle Stan.”
He goes to the door and pauses to look at Bill for a second.
“Just… you know, I think you’re right. I think things will be okay again soon.”
Bill’s brow furrows as Pine Tree heads back inside before he starts chuckling as he shakes his head.
“Weird kid.”
“They’re receptive,” Stan says as he takes up Pine Tree’s seat and Bill tries not to groan. “Not that you’ve made it exactly hard to miss that things are weird between you and my brother. I think the temperature in the room drops by ten degrees every time one of you walks into it. And I thought things were bad with my ex-wife! Ha!”
Bill winces at that, pulling a face as he leans forward to bury his face in his hands.
“Yeah, well, we weren’t even dating—“
“No, you two were just sucking face anytime you were left unsupervised.”
“Please, Pine Tree already got onto me for this. I fucked up and—“
“Summoned a demon, yeah, I heard.”
Bill’s blood runs cold and he looks between his fingers at Stan. …he’s not swinging, he’s not snarling, and Bill can say he’s almost positive that this isn’t Stan then.
“…and you’re cool with that?”
“What? Oh, no, absolutely not. I almost strangled you in your sleep when my brother told me.”
Billy, admittedly, feels a little better with that admission.
“He also said that you came to him to get rid of said demon.”
“Yeah, well… I don’t know. Taking over the universe is so last year.”
Stan snorts at that.
“You’re, like, really cool with that?” Bill tries again. “Don’t want to, I don’t know, punch me in the eye?”
Now Stan shrugs.
“I wouldn’t go that far, but I think watching you walk around on eggshells, convinced one of us is going to take a swing at you or tell the Axolotl—“
“Axo— Oh, wait, no, you said it right.”
“I listen. I’m just saying, you know, you with your tail between your legs ain’t a bad look. Certainly makes me feel better.”
“…but, like, the whole breaking your brother’s heart? Trying to take over the universe? You’re sure you’ve got no murder held in your very large, very family-oriented heart?”
“Don’t go tempting me, Cipher, but… Ford’s an adult, you’re… maybe an adult, I don’t know, how do demons age?”
“Depends,” Bill admits, pulling a face. “Interdimensional demons live to about a hundred millennia or so, sometimes longer if they take care of themselves.”
“You said you were a dream demon though,” Stan remembers.
“Yeah, well, that’s a little more… complicated.”
Stan cracks open his pitt cola and gestures to Bill. He debates for a second before taking in a deep breath and sighing.
“I was born an interdimensional demon, a very precocious, adorable thing. Even though they’re relatively harmless, mostly brokers for deals made between species, they’ve got their own power. It doesn’t help that I was born… different.”
Bill’s voice gets soft, thoughtful.
“They tried to understand me, probably. They couldn’t though. A world full of two-dimensional idiots, they never understood what I saw, understood how I felt. So it was, you know, a little…”
“Othering?” Stan offers and Bill nods.
“Othering. Everyone adored me. ‘Special Billy’, ‘unique Billy’, ‘Billy who sees things no one else can see’.” […crazy Billy.]
Bill grips the bench a little too tight, knuckles turning white as he looks down at the ground.
“I won’t bore you with the sob story of a universe lost to a monster,” and maybe because it’s bad enough to admit it to Ford, admitting it to Stan who he still doesn’t trust not to come swinging at him is another thing, “but I ended up alone. I was drifting through time and space for, easily, a couple millennia. I spent a lot of time floating amongst the stars I’d stared at so long. I saw galaxies born, galaxies die; I saw nebulae explode and reform; stars would go through entire lifecycles in front of my eyes. It was me and the cosmos, so I guess I didn’t feel alone.
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fritzmonorail · 3 days ago
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How I’m choosing to watch Doctor Who apparently.
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dyketennant · 4 months ago
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oh i can already tell i’m about to have some really unpopular opinions about the edge of sleep tv show
#i remember everyone loving the podcast when it came out#but as someone who was an active fan of audio dramas and podcasts for years at that point the show just. made me frustrated#i realized later after listening to left right game that qcode has this very strange and almost uncanny production behind it#where they get incredibly famous actors to play characters and then bank their marketing on that alone#and the writing is always *almost* good. like sometimes you start to think you might actually be listening to a good show#bc i mean the audio quality and special effects are all stellar#but then the writing and acting is always just a little bit too over-the-top and dramatic for it to feel natural#like the writers don’t know how to portray emotion without visuals so they just make everything Way Too Intense#and each time it feels like they just ask ‘what’s the most insane thing that can happen next?’#’oh ok he’s gonna chop dave’s dick off’#and every time you start to actually like a character they say something misogynistic or just otherwise batshit fucking insane#not to mention that time in left right game where a girl confessed her love to her best friend before LITERALLY DYING FOR HER#only for the best friend in the next scene to be like ‘erm i’m not gay 😐 awkward…’ and she’s NEVER BROUGHT UP AGAIN#qcode productions are kinda like the fast fashion of fiction podcasts i think#they churn out so many so quickly and they always feel just slightly unnatural or superficial#not to mention when i tried looking into them years ago and it’s impossible to find#literally anything about them. like their minimalist ass website was so insanely insanely vague#and yet clearly they’ve gotta have a fuck ton of money backing them to have this absurd amount of a-list talent on board#(which really i think that is all they care about)#anyways yeah some markiplier fans are gonna get pissed at me for not kissing the ground he walks on. but i was one of you. i AM one of you#and i hate that somebody out there is holding the iron lung movie over us like we’re dogs and if we wanna watch it#we gotta watch this show. which BTW they are giving no details about where to watch it#and seemingly no promotion or marketing material for a show that’s been in production for years coming out in less than 3 weeks#just weird as fuck man. and i don’t even think mark has much to do with it
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manasurge · 7 months ago
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bleh
#blabbering#rambling/whining/complaining/venting ahead:#I think the horrors have finally caught up to me and the depresso is starting to take hold#i don't usually experience this until winter but I think the sudden drop of activity and people going on hiatus and such -#has triggered this early for me#basically I can't be left alone with my thoughts for too long or i start spiraling REALLY badly.#i don't really handle change very well haha...#i have the notorious curse of second guessing anything and everything and putting it on repeat in my head and then amplifying it#which sucks bc I don't have any more escapisms that work now bc this was already my escapism and I have no human connections irl#(I'm not kidding either. I've failed time and time again to make friends irl and was always the proactive one about it. But alas... ugh)#my only source for connections is online bc i struggle to make friends (especially at my age and how my energy keeps depleting and depletin#might lowkey be sharkweek but usually I just get more agitated and not this (this is very specific to the winter horrors™ for me)#i guess I may as well check out the spears while they're around still (tho in between me making dinner). I'm just feeling super bummed out#and not excited like I was the other day about it (ofc I blame the depresso™).#I don't even know what to do for my beta characters. Head empty. Head gone. sigh.#also it sucks bc next week is gonna kick my ass at work (canada day/july 4th/july in general/5 DAYS and long shifts in there too)#i'm going to be so tired and so alone and with nothing to look forward to. Idk what to do bc none of my usual distractions are effective no#No escape. No seretonin. No company. Nothin'. I notice I when i start getting bad like this when I fall back hard into pokemon#(because it was my childhood escapism and I was a neglected only child who was left alone a lot; hence the connection lol)#i'll probably just have to suffer through it and be an absolute wreck of a person i think. I don't really have any other options#watch me get sick again bc canada sucks to work bc everyone has it off and they ALL GO TO THE STORE I WORK AT AND IT SUCKS.#gonna try to draw more too but the depresso is eating my brain worms (the healthy brain worms)
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daily-lightbulbii · 7 months ago
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(//i don't normally do text but cw in the tags erm. i went a little off track)
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confusedspaceotter · 3 months ago
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What if I say what most streaming services are doing(releasing all episodes at once) shouldn’t be a thing in the first place(except maybe for shows like BBC Sherlock lmao)
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eggmeralda · 8 months ago
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do you ever feel casually suicidal? like you're not depressed or anything you're doing fine but also it feels like a convenient option
#if you can't make connections with people or be seen by anyone then like. at least you can feel like you're helping a better cause#to like charities and gfms and anyone else#but you have to tone that down bc you're slowly losing money bc you still can't get a job#and bc you don't have a job it means you're just stuck in the house all day. which gives Way Too Much opportunity to Think about everything#and also so like. i still share a room with my sister but it was fine bc she'd stay at her bf's a few nights a week#but he's got a job that's a bit further away and basically she can't go round his as much. so now it's maybe like once a week#the room is getting messier so it gives me less energy to do anything#you can get really into an unhealthy weight loss obsession bc at least it feels like you're getting towards something#but idek is set weight theory real? bc once i get down to a certain point it suddenly resets#like honestly counting calories and donating money to every gfm i saw and writing a film script was what kept me going#but first one isn't working and second i need some sort of income and third is finished and i have no way of actually creating it#and then there's the whole lack of stable hyperfixation and ability to find new music i enjoy#and realistically what would fix me is having a good job that i enjoy and somewhere to live on my own#but until i get a job that's currently impossible. and even then it probably won't feel like enough#my entire life is lived on my phone i need more physical objects but i don't have enough space#bc i share a room with my sister. it's like all my problems are connected#and i have enough optimism that i still think it'll get better in the next few weeks. maybe i'll be able to get a job and that'll#get everything going again#but at the same time i could easily just die#I've graduated from uni. I've seen the who live 3 times. I've crashed my car twice. I've watched 30 years of corrie. I've met various dogs#what else is there to do with my life honestly#(<- joking)#but yeah like. in summer 2021 i almost got suicidal (it was just letting the occasional thought linger in my mind etc)#but that was bc i was so depressed#but now it feels like i could just kill myself. but more just out of convenience#idek. i'm not gonna kill myself. bc i have a job interview on tuesday. and just in general i won't#but there is this casual feeling of like. well i might as well. i can't describe it#ramble#suicide tw#weight loss mention
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musical-chick-13 · 20 days ago
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My God. Does anyone knows when it stops hurting. Does anyone know how to stop feeling like this.
#I can't even talk about it#I've TRIED to talk about it but nobody FUCKING UNDERSTANDS#you do not know what it is like to have this particular life experience and have it impact every GODDAMN THING that you do#I try to scream about it into the void to MAYBE find other people but no one listens. I try to explain things so that it can make sense#from a logical standpoint but I can't ever make it translate.#I have people I love and people I trust and I am still so fucking alone#GOD and my birthday's tomorrow and I am once again reminded of the passage of time and how I haven't done anything with my life#and how I haven't had a single fucking '''normative''' experience. yeah yeah you shouldn't care TOO BAD--I DO#I care so much. too much. about everything. and that means that literally every single thing in my life is impossible.#and then everything in this country is about to go completely to hell in like 3 weeks which means that I'm gonna be fighting for basic#survival. and I told myself I was at least going to get things done before then. but. well. the past three weeks happened.#genuinely I might become an alcoholic about this I don't know how I can make it through another year otherwise#tw: alcohol#tw: suicidal ideation#tw: current events#In the Vents#*sigh* maybe I can get Cheap Fast Food Breakfast#maybe that will bring me enough temporary joy to make it through the next few hours#and then maybe I play Farming Game again. or watch an anime abridged series#or do a jigsaw puzzle#because I don't think I can do anything creative right now. it's just not there. which SUUUUUUUUUCKS. I'm so tired man.#I want to be a fish. or an amorphous cloud. or at least a completely different person. maybe a better one. or someone more worthy of love.#but I'll take just about ANY kind of different at this point short of being a straight-up asshole
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opens-up-4-nobody · 9 months ago
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...
#my dads back in ohio again so im back on my own. i still feel terrible but at least i have a plan#i have 2 weeks of this semester left. so i have to not fail my genomics exam and work on a group project plus grade a bunch#shouldnt be too hard but everything makes me so tired rn and i just feel this barrier between myself and everything else#even when my dad was here. i just dont kno how to feel happy. just varied levels of stress#but after the semester is over ill have to find a job for the summer. which super stresses me out bc i havent really had a real job outside#academia and im worried about how stressful ill find it bc im sure its gonna suck but at least i wont have to work on my project#i just think if i had a normal job that doesnt dominate every aspect of my life id feel a little less terrible. or at least i wouldnt send#myself spiralling so much. if i stay here i might not survive it#but what if ill just make myself miserable wherever i am? i dunno. but im gonna try to find a non academic job this summer with the epa or#maybe the usgs. i mean ive gota a bachelor's and a masters in environmental topics. that's gotta count for something#just get a government job. pray for a not terrible set of coworkers. and build something from there#it just sucks bc i feel like everythings falling apart and like i kno if i gave it my all i could pull thru and get my phd but im just so#tired of struggling against something everyone else can do. i just cant read at a level appropriate for what im doing#ugh. i dont wanna study for genomics. i just wanna sleep. i just wish i wasn't in this position#and now i a baby about it. i mean my sisters r in similar positions bc the youngest is currently looking for a teaching job. and my middle#sister is looking to move to new york city in the next 6 months and she'd be quitting her job for that. so we're all sorta in flux#i just wanna not be flailing. not watch my hopes and dreams collapse. be excited about anything. im just sad bc i have to make hard choices#even if i know theyre the right ones to make if i want to continue to exist. sometimes u cant have the things u wany.#and that sucks and i hate it. theme of the year: sometimes life sucks and theres nothing u can do abt it#unrelated
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orcelito · 27 days ago
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Little Tally has been plodding around and she was trying to get into a box earlier and she later came up to me and stared at me expectantly then later tried to eat my plants again and just now she came up to sit next to me purring again and leaning into my pets
The medicine really is making her feel better I think. And it's really highlighting how bad she Has been feeling. Bc these are all very basic things, but she hasn't been doing it. Even up to her little walk, the plodding sounds of her footsteps... before today, she was moving so stiffly, an awkward little shamble, so I couldn't even really hear her when she got up (which was nowhere near as much as normal). Something as simple as hearing her drinking water is making me emotional. If she starts yowling tonight when I go to bed I really might just cry.
I really hope this keeps up... she's got just one more day of meds, but maybe it'll be enough... I hope so...
#speculation nation#animal illness ment/#im never going to complain about her again. even if she poops in the drain again.#i love her so dearly and a week ago when i didnt know what was wrong besides the fact that she was in pain and wouldnt eat much...#i cried so hard. i was so scared. bc while she may be a little shithead at times shes so so dear to me.#ive had her for 3 years now... watched her turn from an excitable 1 year old to a chiller (but still mischievous) 4 year old...#shes my little chaos demon who shrugs off any inconvenience and just moves onto the next thing just like that.#so seeing her so stiff and lethargic... it just feels so *wrong*.#it really has been so upsetting. ive been trying to not think about it too much. focusing on making sure shes eating.#just doing what i can for her. but god i want my tally back.#shes still not eating as much as normal but shes been eating some and shes moving around more than she has been#and asking for attention instead of just laying on the couch doing nothing for hours and hours...#my tally gets BORED and she hasnt been. she didnt even cause chaos when we were at my sister's place. it felt so wrong.#so. we'll hope this is signs of an upturn. and that she'll keep on this trend.#and if she doesnt. well i have that appointment scheduled for blood tests on Thursday.#if she goes back to how she was before after im out of the meds then itll have been like 2 weeks of this#which is a long time for a cat to be sick with a cold. and so the blood tests would be necessary.#even though i know she hates it. she got mad at me this morning when i picked her up to bring her to her food#both bc i disturbed her and also bc i think there was a moment where she thought i was bringing her back to the box.#and she didnt eat much right then. so i waited a bit and then brought the food to her. and she ate more then.#and then her meds! which she had a dose yesterday but it didnt affect her as much as today's dose seems to have.#she may also have just been recovering from the stress of it + the fluids thing they gave her on her scruff.#she was a Very unhappy camper yesterday. but shes doing better today... and thats what matters...#so glad shes been asking for affection. i was scared she was legit mad at me. since i keep bringing her to weird places.#it's for her health though... she might not understand it but it's all for her sake...
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depresseddepot · 1 month ago
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weird thing about me is that I am so serious about new year's resolutions that the last week of december feels like I'm in one of those "preparing for war" montages (but in a good way)
#mine are always very easy to complete and i dont kick myself if i miss a day#like last year mine was to watch one new movie a week (bc i never ever watch movies despite wanting to) and i did it! mostly#and my one for this year is in three parts. a) read every day bc i fell out of that habit and even one page counts#b) finish my physical TBR shelf (i think its about 70 books? itll be tough but i think i can do it)#and c) read a nonfiction book at least once a month because as much as i love fiction there are a LOT of nonfics piling up#that i really want to read and i sort of neglect them in favor of my constant escapism. so.#ANYWAY i think about that statistic of how many people fail at their new years resolution and it makes me feel like i have rabies#but like. spite rabies#i made a list of interesting nyrs a few months ago and the amount of articles i had to read by smug wealthy men made me sick in the head#and only achieving my goals out of spite will heal me#anyway follow me on storygraph xoxo (ththalassocracy)#you can watch me in real time as i try once again to read a book popular at the library i work at and get disappointed almost every time#ignore the fact that ive been listening to an audiobook for almost a year now. dont look at me#ahh i love new years though. its such a fresh and clean start#2026 im thinking abt having a new resolution for each month so that i can sort of teach myself how to apply that Fresh Start feeling anytim#so that i dont have to wait for new years bc i have fleeting goals and hobbies all the time and its fun to commit to things#without the horror of failing (or consequences)#also next year i wanted to try my Shower Olympics resolution but that one would NOT last a full year lol#so maybe. but i dont actually want to start planning anything until at least june#AND THIS YEAR I HAVE 6 DAYS OFFFF right at new years!!! so i get to deep clean AND rest AND start off my resolution really strongly#im so fucking excited i might do that every year because the joy i feel at having those days off during new years is incredible
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hearts401 · 2 months ago
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im having a lonely week and i cant even blame it on my period this time so like
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miodiodavinci · 1 year ago
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well 😔 after literally 3+ years of masking and double masking with N95s and KN95s and social distancing and not going anywhere where i can't be assured i won't be in close proximity to someone with COVID ya boy got COVID , , , ,
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challenge-ant · 2 months ago
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if I was lola I would have such a crush on ant oh my god how does she do it
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housefreak · 3 months ago
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i know i keep posting like this but i could go see the substance tomorrow before evil dead........ i could do this.........
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