#and like I get to interact with the fandom more on a weekly basis

[confusedspaceotter]

What if I say what most streaming services are doing(releasing all episodes at once) shouldn’t be a thing in the first place(except maybe for shows like BBC Sherlock lmao)

[1schadenfreude1]

Rewriting Cain Boyfriend to Death 2 Love how the BTD fandom just collectively agreed to adopt EP's characters as our own I am absolutely tormented by the fact that Cain had so much potential but just. does not have the best writing ugh he's too similar to Rire and it kills me SO I am rewriting the fallen angel, lots of headcanons below the cut

Cain's number one motivation for why he does what he does is BOREDOM He's been torturing people in hell for centuries and it's become BORING. He wants something new, something interesting. He wants to see live humans and savor their emotions. Cain misses being human He'd never admit it out loud of course, but he does miss having real human emotions and enjoying human pleasures. Of course he can't be on earth too long while angels are hunting him, but maybe, spending time with humans will help him regain some of that human feeling?

Cain is chaotic evil incarnate LISTEN everyone in btd2 is a silly dork and Cain should be one too. He should have the most unpredictable and immature chaotic energy. Do you trust this face??? You shouldn't

I think he just. does shit without thinking. Like he's been away from real humans for so long that he's sort of forgotten how fragile they can be.

"Oh c'mon little toy you can handle a little boiling water, right? Hello? Human? Fuck. Guess I need a new one." Yeah he's incredibly overpowered but that doesn't mean he knows how to USE that power lmao. He doesn't know how to interact with people anymore. he wants to be human again, but all he really knows how to do is…torture people. he's so dumb.

Straight up contradicting canon here but-- Cain feels bad for killing Abel Asking about Abel makes Cain get SUPER uncomfortable and shut down. He doesn't wanna talk about it. He definitely doesn't feel remorse about it. Nope. No remorse here. Abel is DEAD and GONE and good riddance and he DEFINITELY doesn't have lingering issues about it. Fuck you. Rips you apart with chains.

He loves bullying Damien though They have each other's phone numbers for god's sake. Cain sends Damien gore porn of the people he's killed. Those two try to kill each other on a weekly basis. It's normal for them. Yes that is Damien's severed arm on the living room wall. It brings Cain joy. Don't worry about it. Totally normal thing to say to your sibling

Cain and Rire are rivals I think this is basically canon (based on Darqx's gorgeous art and animatics) but I wanna delve into it a bit! They're both incredibly powerful supernatural monsters, but their main difference comes down to this: Rire is lawful evil Cain is chaotic evil Cain kills people for purely selfish reasons: he wants to see human reactions and feel their emotions again. He thinks that causing pain will help him feel human. Rire kills people because its his job to collect souls. He loves his job and has a lot of fun with it, but in the end its still his job.

Cain is much, much older but Rire is way more mature

Cain is more powerful, but can't do much when he's stuck in Tartarus Rire is less powerful but has much more freedom of movement

Cain likes to play the long game, seducing victims with romance before going sadistic on them Rire is a busy demon; he likes to have fun but needs that soul sooner rather than later

Cain plans long elaborate dates because he's bored and reads too many romance novels Rire's plans are short and brutal, he does what he wants and that's it

Cain loves humans and wants to savor their reactions and emotions Rire hates humans and treats them like disposable toys

Cain is more interested in pain than sex, he won't rape a victim unless he really likes them Rire likes sex lmao. its a power rush for him and it feels good I hope my ramblings make sense lol

[slayerkitty]

Narrative Frameworks in Only Friends

So here we are, the finale of Only Friends and not a framework in sight. Would the last half of the show worked better in some respects if we had the frameworks come back? Would we understand more about why Boston's friends hate him? (Did they ever like him? Ray seemed to, but Mew and Cheum...)

I wish we had gotten more frameworks toward the end. I wish the voiceovers had come back for the last episode if nothing else, because I would have wanted one from each character. It would have maybe solved some of the narrative issues (re: Boston).

I also wanted to thank everyone who liked, reblogged, commented or otherwise interacted with me and these posts on a weekly basis. Your feedback, discussions and general love made watching Only Friends an amazing experience each week and reminded me why I love being in fandoms.

Shoutout to the amazing members of the Ephemerality Squad who made this ride fun and thought provoking: @lurkingshan, @waitmyturtles, @wen-kexing-apologist, @chickenstrangers, @ranchthoughts, @twig-tea, @clara-maybe-ontheroad, @distant-screaming, @thatgirl4815, @elizabethsebestianhedgehog

I've gone back and added things to earlier episodes that weren't there before, so make sure to read through the whole list! Please let me know if I missed anything - I will edit this post based on suggestions.

Frameworks:

1. Voiceovers: gives the audience specific insight into a characters thoughts and feelings; also a great way to provide exposition. It’s more of an audio than visual framework, as we don’t always see the character doing the voice-over because it plays over other scenes.

2. “Talking Heads”: The characters talk directly to the camera, interview/documentary style. We get to see exactly how they feel about a given moment because they are reacting to it at that time. Audio and visual. Homage to Love8009 (per P'Jojo).

3. Social Media (ft The Artist Formerly Known as Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook): Not as insightful as the other two frameworks but does give context and a way for interaction, commentary, and exposition on a given plot. Visual. Probable homage to Together With Me, one of the first spicy BLs starring our kings, MaxTul.

(Side Note: I was re-watching some scenes from Never Let me Go and realized P'Jojo uses yellow text on the screen in it too. So maybe he just likes the yellow text or maybe it means something, idk, idk.)

Episode 1

Framework: Voiceover

Title: What’s Your Role in a Bar?

Narrator: Mew

Visual Moment: Yellow title cards listing everyone’s “roles” as well as the month and days of the week

End Credit Shot: Mew sitting on the floor in front of his fish tank

Episode 2

Framework: Talking Heads

Title: M.F.M. My Favorite Man

Narrator: Everyone

Visual Moment: The talking heads scenes; SandRay smoke kiss; Boston's dark room; Photo Boston takes of Nick post sex; Photo of RayMew from wakeboarding

Audible Moment: The songs Ray plays during his scenes with Sand

End Credit Shot: Ray driving

Episode 3

Framework: Social Media (Twitter and Instagram)

Title: What Am I to You?

Narrator: Nick and Boston

Audible Moment: The thunder rumbling ominously over everyone's bad decisions, Nick listening to the TopBoston sex audio

Visual Moment: Top's Instagram (with all of Boston's comments); Photo strip of TopBoston from their hookup in the photo booth; Photo of the Fab Four in Boston's room; Nick watching TopBoston have sex; Photo of RayMew kissing

End Credit Shot: Nick listening to TopBoston sex audio

Episode 4

Framework: Voiceover

Title: Emergency Contact

Narrator: Ray

Visual Moment: The flashback of RayMew is in 4:3 ratio (meaning it looks like recorded footage versus a memory); yellow text onscreen indicates flashback

Audible Moment: TopMew at the silent disco (both moments of silence but also them singing); SandRay listening to music at the record store

End Credit Shot: Ray driving (repeat from episode 2)

Episode 5:

Framework: Voiceover

Title: The Extra Hour

Narrator: Sand

Visual Moment: Intro and Outro are animated; black and white (made me think of the Take on Me MV by A-ha but I’m open to suggestions on what this might be referring to), "Ray o'clock/Alone o'clock" appearing onscreen in white letters (not yellow!); TopMew going Instagram official; The blind dining scene

End Credit Shot: Sand driving his motorcycle

Episode 6:

Framework: None

Title: Happy Fucking Birthday

Narrator: None

Audible Moment: Ray listens to the TopBoston sex audio; Mew plays the TopBoston sex audio for Top

Visual Moment: Top draws Mew sleeping/gives Mew a book of drawings he did of Mew; BostonNick selfies

End Credit Shot: Top in his bathtub alone looking angsty

Episode 7:

Framework: None

Title: After Effect

Narrator: None

Visual Moment: Mew setting the drawing on fire; Boston’s sex tape; the “super zooms”

End Credit Shot: Mew sitting on the floor in front of his fish tank (repeat from episode 1)

Episode 8:

Framework: None

Title: Save Me

Narrator: None

Visual Moment: Facebook party invite/everyone’s reactions to the invite; Everyone’s costumes at the party

End Credit Shot: Boston looking angsty at the hostel

Episode 9:

Framework: None

Title: The Return

Narrator: None

Visual Moment: Boston’s photo of Atom; Top recording SandRay kissing;

End Credit Shot: Top in his bathtub alone looking angsty (repeat from episode 6)

Episode 10:

Framework: None

Title: Redemption

Narrator: None

Visual Moment: The “I will never leave you”/“I will never love you” neon sign; Boston’s photos of Atom; Nick’s photo as Boston’s lock screen; Boeing’s Instagram

End Credit Shot: Ray driving (repeat from episode 2 and episode 4)

Episode 11:

Framework: None

Title: Move On Move In

Narrator: None

Visual Moment: Boston taking pics of NickAtom

End Credit Shot: Sand driving his motorcycle (repeat from episode 5)

Episode 12:

Framework: None

Title: Begin Again

Narrator: None

Visual Moment: Yellow letters indicating the date (NYE); Framed photo of Nick; Framed photo of the Fab Four at the hostel; Mix's entrance; Begin Again montage of SandRay; Hostel sign "Only Friends Stay"

Audible Moment: Begin Again montage of SandRay

End Credit Shot: Outtakes/BTS

Tagging @sandrayy by request

Apologies to anyone I forgot!

[olderthannetfic]

I'm sorry I need to vent but I don't get having mutuals. I thought it's how people on tumblr/twitter make friends (which seems that's how a lot of them treat it) but I found myself getting mutuals when some blogs I follow follow back. I thought they wanted to be friends since that's how they are with their other mutuals but other than like some of my posts when they started following me, they don't really interact with any of my posts now. We only have one fandom in common and I don't really posts much about that and when I do, they don't even like it or anything. It can't even be cause I reblog other people's stuff about that fandom cause they're following those people, too.

I don't understand why they're following my blog when they don't have a reason to be here? Is it those "follow for follow" things? It just makes me feel, I dunno strange(?), I guess, seeing my follower count and I could count on one hand how many of them still like my posts occasionally and none of those are my mutuals.

I wish there's a way to just remove them from my followers without removing me from their followers cause I still very much like their posts. It'd just be awkward softblocking them and then following again and they'd be notified and maybe they'd wonder why (if they even remember me at this point).

--

What the hell, anon?

How you make friends is by talking to people.

I don't even follow back half the people I actually talk to on tumblr because I forget. I never see likes. They're hidden on my activity page because who the fuck cares about likes?

I have people on here who reblog me frequently whom I rarely publicly interact with. You'd think I'm snubbing them. In fact, we're offline friends.

I have people I consider dear internet friends whom I chat with on a weekly or even daily basis in private whom you'll rarely see me talk to here even though this is how we met.

How I can tell if I'm friendly acquaintances with someone is by us talking enough that I remember who they are. I'm really bad at remembering internet handles as discrete individuals if I've never met the person. Once I start to actually remember you, it means something.

How I can tell we're friends is that we've built some emotional intimacy, usually by talking in private, often about our actual lives or, even more tellingly, our philosophies, aspirations, and struggles with making art.

If I can be vulnerable with someone in private in a way I wouldn't be publicly on tumblr, then we're friends. Of course, you never know if it's precisely mutual on the exact same level on a given day, but nothing in life is guaranteed.

Having shared fandoms is irrelevant.

Whether you are mutuals is irrelevant.

Likes are irrelevant.

Reblogs with no commentary are irrelevant.

If you don't meaningfully interact with the person, you are not friends.

[yumeka-sxf]

A chronological analysis on Twilight and Yor - Season 1 Wrap-Up

*This is a wrap-up post for my Twiyor analysis series. If you missed the Introduction/Part 1, click here*

----------

As some of you may know, I'm fairly new to the SxF fandom, having only started watching the anime in October of last year. But it didn't take long for me to become hyperfixated enough to binge the manga, start my own blog, and develop ideas for analysis posts.

I've always enjoyed meta writing for my favorite fandoms, and SxF is definitely one of those! While I like many things about the story and characters, the Forgers overall, especially Twiyor, are my favorite thing about it, so I wanted to focus my first analysis posts on them. During my early months in the fandom, I found lots of good analyses and was impressed by the amount of talented fan writers out there. But rather than write random stand-alone posts, I wanted to express all my thoughts in chronological order. I eventually came up with the idea for this post series in December of last year, and after spending a solid month of writing during most of my free time, I finally felt I had enough to begin posting on a weekly basis.

Now that I've come to the end of the season 1 posts, I want to express my sincerest thanks to everyone who read them, especially those who left nice comments and reblogs. Even for those of you who only left likes, I appreciate it! I pay attention to the notes on my blog and it always makes my day to see the same people interacting with each new post every week. It's especially gratifying when I see a new person come along and leave a like on each post in order, one after another! In the many fandoms I've been in over the years, I always write for myself and my own enjoyment first, regardless of whether other people will enjoy my writing too. But it's nice to know that other people can also appreciate how I interpret things.

So here's what's going to happen with the post series going forward…

Since I want to continue keeping the posts as manga spoiler-free as possible, I won't start releasing the next batch of posts until season 2 airs (it's scheduled to air in October). I'll most likely release part 19 and onward towards the middle or end of season 2's run. I already have a good idea of what manga chapters will be adapted and will get them queued up beforehand.

On that note, I did end up having to tag a few of the season 1 posts for manga spoilers. I tried to avoid it as much as possible; I only discussed manga spoilers if I felt not doing so would be a disservice to my analysis. However, once season 2 airs, all but part 18 should be safe for anime-only fans! (I'll go back to those posts and remove the spoiler tags)

At some point during or slightly before season 2's airing, I plan to reblog all of my Twiyor analysis posts in order. If I can get the timing right, I hope to reblog part 18 (the last season 1 post) right before my start date for the first season 2 post. I'll probably do the reblogs just a few days apart before doing weekly releases again when I get to the new posts (for the reblogs, I'll be using the hashtag "#reblog for season 2 hype")

I don't have any other big analysis posts planned until then, with one exception…I do plan to write a post about Anya. I originally wanted to include her in the chronological series, but since her character arc is simpler and more straight-forward compared to Twilight's and Yor's, I didn't have nearly as much to say about her and figured it'd be best to talk about her in a separate post. Not sure when I'll release that post but should be sometime before season 2 as well.

Guess that's all for now! Thank you again to everyone who read this post series and I look forward to more compelling discussions in season 2!

[grymmnox]

weekly fic recs #29

hiiii totall forgot it was saturday whoopsies

fandom(s): bungo stray dogs, my hero academia, the owl house

ship(s): soukoku, shin soukoku, rimlaine, zenku soukoku (is that their ship name?? my memory sucks. mori n fukuzawa), kunikidazai, kunichuuzai (? kunisoukoku??? i like kunichuuzai better i think)

Oneshots

the importance of changing bandages; candy_cigarettes - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 2.3k words | chuuya/dazai, chuuya & dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

"If they ever shared soft moments like this– Dazai humming a tune while Chuuya unwrapped his armor of bandages– Chuuya had forced himself to forget it.

Tonight felt like the first time Chuuya’s fingers were ever this gentle, especially brushing against Dazai’s bare skin; tonight felt like the first time Dazai allowed himself to be truly unwound."

or

Dazai gets drunk, and Chuuya does his best.

Anesthesia High; pickleurpickle - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 4.1k words | chuuya/dazai, chuuya & dazai, dazai & kunikida, atsushi & dazai & kyouka

summary:

After getting his wisdom teeth removed, Atsushi and Kyouka are given the task of collecting Dazai after the surgery. Neither were expecting to find that an executive had beaten them to it.

Or, Atsushi and Kyouka watching Dazai and Chuuya interact gently with eachother for a change while coincidentally at the dentist

Morning Rolls Around; Bibliophile109 - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 5.6k words | READ TAGS

summary:

Dazai struggles with depression—old news. But when it looks like his brain will kill him before he even gets the chance to fulfill Oda’s last request, he turns to drastic measures.

“Dazai’s memory has always been infallible; a steel trap, more machine than human, just like his ability to strategize and manipulate. Losing that certainty… is not something he takes lightly.”

Bird Bones in Spring; whatafunnythinglifeis - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 26.7k words | chuuya/dazai, akutagawa/atsushi, ranpo & yosano, dazai & yosano, dazai & kunikida, kouyou & yosano, atsushi & ranpo, mori & yosano, dazai & mori, atsushi & kyouka, ADA & dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

In which Corruption has turned against its vessel's saving grace not once, but two times.

Chuuya struggles with Corruption and the effects of what he had done while in that state while Dazai tries to be more honest, and is encouraged to do so by those around him despite the possible consequences. Yosano gets tipsy so that she can face her problems without having a mental breakdown, and Atsushi tries to understand what's going on while trying to come to terms with the relationship that he has been developing with a certain mafioso.

Please keep the tags in mind!

June 19th, 23:59; bluemoonwisteria_fuji (wisteriafuji) - bungo stray dogs

general audiences | 2.8k words | dazai & kunikida, dazai/kunikida, ADA & dazai, dazai & mori

summary:

“Well, I suppose it’s only fitting,” Dazai muses, his voice awfully melancholic. “After all, birthday parties are reserved for those who are worth celebrating.”

“Don’t say that.” Kunikida nudges his partner. “You’re quite the handful. And yes, you’re shortening my lifespan on a daily basis. But, I have seen more than just the silly, childish side of you. I have seen a very caring and selfless man who willingly throws himself in danger’s way just to help people. And that Dazai deserves more than he’ll ever know.”

“You’re far too kind, Kunikida-kun.”

Or, the Agency decides to throw a surprise birthday party for Dazai, and Kunikida is assigned to keep him away from the office while the preparations are being made. Things go slightly awry because it’s Dazai and he just can't seem to have nice things. Or can he?

circle of praise; Oxalisalis - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 1.8k words | ADA & atsushi, ADA & dazai

summary:

Within the agency, there is a secret, surefire way to boost low morale. Atsushi is about to experience it firsthand.

OR

Atsushi is feeling down, so the agency members work together to lift his spirits. Featuring aggressive praise, backhanded compliments, and one very embarrassed Dazai.

Silence Says More Than You Could Know; nakkacor - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 2k words | ADA & PM, ADA & dazai, dazai & PM, atsushi & PM, ADA & atsushi, dazai & mori, atsushi & dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

“There will always be a place for you by my side, Dazai-kun.”

“There will always be a place for you in hell.”

-

Atsushi can smell feelings on everyone except Dazai, but in a time where Atsushi thought nothing could change as much as it has, it seems as if that will change too.

I miss you; Scarlet_Nin - bungo stray dogs

not rated | 3.7k words | ADA & dazai, dazai & oda, chuuya & dazai

summary:

“Why celebrate a day I am alive longer, when I want to die? Honestly, the image of some fat guy breaking into houses to leave presents is amusing. Are you Santa, Odasaku? You’ve done the same, haven’t you? Breaking into people’s houses undetected only with a small difference.”

Speaking of his own crimes is easier than speaking of Odasaku’s for reasons he can’t explain. They both know how much blood is on each other’s hands, so there is no reason to remind his friend. Wallowing in the past is wasted time, he doesn’t wish to have. Also, knowing what face Odasaku will make leaves the taste of his whiskey unsavory bitter on his tongue.

“I am.”

“Of course, that’s—wait, hang on, you are?” A single eye blinks, taken aback.

Heart to Heart; mostladylikeladythateverladied (orphan_account) - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 1.4k words | chuuya/dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

He squeezed Dazai’s hand, then let go and moved to his injured leg. The blood was beginning to leak through the shoddy workmanship and a better wrap with some disinfectant was needed quickly. Still, Chuuya’s hands shook a little which forced him to slow down. Eventually, the bandages came loose and the bare skin beneath revealed their secret.

“...What is this?”

You Would Hold Your Cards Inside Your Chest; BloomingAlyssum - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 1.1k words | dazai & ranpo

summary:

Ranpo and the newbie stop at a bakery on the way back from a case.

How Could I Trust Me With Anyone Else?; Magical_Bucket - bungo stray dogs

mature | 10.7k words | chuuya/dazai, ango & dazai & oda, chuuya & oda, ango & dazai, dazai & oda | READ TAGS

summary:

""But… Chuuya’s such a loyal dog, and dog's are known for their separation anxiety, right? What if Chuuya gets so unsocialized his tiny brain reverts to growling forever!" Dazai huffed and pouted at the ceiling, Ango couldn’t help but chuckle and shake his head. Oda simply sighed similarly to how a tired, disappointed parent would."

After a raid goes off the rails, Dazai jumps from a window to save Chuuya, landing them both in the hospital. This is fine, according to Dazai. What was not fine, however, was getting dragged to the hospital and separated while Chuuya's phobia mixed with his usual post corruption state existed.

Needless to say, Dazai is not happy about any of it.

close your eyes, have no fear (the monster is gone); boopiejokes - the owl house

general audiences | 2.5k words | eda & hunter, hunter & luz

summary:

Eda wasn’t all that shocked to find the post Golden Guard pressed up against the wall, gloved hands over his mouth and tears shining in his eyes in a need for comfort, even if he didn’t know it himself.

{ he’s on the run, and your momma’s here }

Completed Fics

Shayō; YunaYamiMoto - bsd/mha fusion

teen and up | 3 chapters | 21.1k words | chuuya/dazai, rimbaud/verlaine, dazai & mori, dazai & PM, chuuya & PM, hawks & miruko, aizawa & hawks, nezu & U.A. staff, all might & nezu, dazai & hirotsu, fukuzawa/mori, ADA & PM, LOV & shigaraki, akutagawa & atsushi, akutagawa & dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

The Symbol of Peace has retired and no other Hero could fill in his shoes, so the Hero-vs-Villains based society of Japan slides slowly from All Might's blinding light and takes a dip into the darkness and shadows of the night. Only to find a Demon staring back with a God of Calamity in his command and the power to make the Underworld outside of Yokohama tremble in fear.

Incomplete Fics

i'll die in his cold, cold arms; venusdahlia - bungo stray dogs

mature | 24/? chapters | 115k words | chuuya/dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

“Dazai-san, you’re staring.” Atsushi noticed, finding a spot over the railing next to Dazai. “Hm. I guess so.” He replied, not looking away from the rink. Just for a moment, the brunet’s eyes reflected the bright light from the overhead lights, a bright glow engulfing them. “It’s not that often I have the time to see you guys act so barbaric, it’s very entertaining.”

Atsushi gave the other a light shove. “Is that really what you’re here to see?”

Annoyed, Dazai moved his gaze with narrow eyes towards Atsushi. Before he could shoot back at him, a loud yell from the rink interrupted them. “THE FUCK ARE YOU LOOKING AT, YOU LOUSY PILE OF BANDAGES?!”

-

Where after losing a bet, Nakahara Chuuya, a skilled but short-tempered hockey player, is forced to train with Dazai Osamu , the most annoying figure skater he had the misfortune to meet.

The Edge of the Forest and Sea; inkygo, Volvihoney - bungo stray dogs

mature | 11/? chapters | 17.8k words | dazai/kunikida, chuuya/dazai, chuuya/dazai/kunikida, chuuya & dazai & kunikida, dazai & ranpo, atsushi & dazai, chuuya/kunikida | READ TAGS

summary:

“I’m sure your new plaything is too wrapped up in your lies to be out to get you, and you’d just pick my new lock anyways.”

“Chuu-chuu thinks so low of me!”

or After everything is resolved, Dazai is forcibly dragged to therapy by his boyfriend, Kunikida. Things are rediscovered that he would have rather kept buried.

Dazai Undercover; Bibliophile109 - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 5/? chapters | 6k words | ADA & dazai

summary:

“I thought the new employee was recommended by the Special Abilities Department,” Kunikida says weakly.

The man waves his hand carelessly. “Yes, yes, Father knows someone there, it’s all very convenient. Say, would you happen to know when the lunch break is?”

-

Dazai puts a bit more effort into hiding his Mafia background from the ADA, and ends up pretending to be a spoiled rich kid.

a legacy of love; magicandlight - bungo stray dogs

mature | 17/? chapters | 30.5k words | chuuya/dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

He's been sick for weeks when he finally gives in and goes to a free clinic.

If it weren't for his promise to Odasaku, he wouldn't have bothered. Dazai would have just allowed whatever mysterious illness he had to kill him.

But he promised Oda he'd be better, and he hasn't done that yet.

Maybe it's cancer, he thinks. The symptoms technically fit.

(Spoiler: It's Not.)

[majorbaby]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 🤍

thank you! i enjoyed reading through your list. in the order i would recommend them in:

Goodbye, Farewell and Amen to that Oliver/Trapper/Hawkeye, Rated E

This was the most fun I've ever had writing anything. Oliver and Trapper are in an established relationship (I called it friends with benefits, but i fully wrote them in love) when Ollie gets his discharge papers. They start to have goodbye (farewell and amen) sex when they're walked in on by Hawkeye and everyone goes to bed satisfied.

My interest in these three has never waned, they're hot, they're probably the MASH throuple I can best imagine cohabiting long term (they've had practice) and in MASH Goes to Maine Oliver and Trapper do move to Maine to help Hawkeye establish a clinic so like, in my brain it's canon.

cherry bomb! Trapper/Hawkeye, Rated E I wrote this for Valentine's Day this year. Hawkeye wears lingerie for Trapper while they're on R&R together, blowing his mind amongst other things.

It's kinky (feminization with a working girl/john RP) but I think when they do RP/kink/a scene it's more like they're doing a bit. It's a yes-and? activity, with room for improvisation and breaks, and roles aren't set in stone.

Prom Night Trapper/Hawkeye, Rated E

My very first foray into proper smut. I wrote this for the 50th anniversary of MASH. It's a post-ep for s01e03 Requiem for a Lightweight which I maintain is the horniest episode of MASH. Not my best work but I think it's a solid entry and it helped me work through my thoughts on what their sex is like.

A man ahead of his time

This is a Trapper multiverse anthology I used to add to on a weekly basis. It's not abandoned but it has served its purpose, which was to force myself to write after considering myself retired from fanfiction for many years. I still have lots of prompts and WIPs for it in the drafts and I may continue adding to it.

I've linked to the most recent chapter, which I published on the 40th anniversary of GFA's original air date earlier this year. It's an AU where Trapper didn't leave and is there for the final days of the war. For something I wrote very hastily to make an arbitrary deadline, I am quite fond of it. It's mostly a tense Trapper-BJ interaction that resolves as warmly as I can imagine it being between them, with Hawkeye's breakdown looming over both of them.

Keep me warm in your love, then you softly leave Trapper/Hawkeye, Rated T It's all right. I no longer pine for an in-person Trapper/Hawkeye goodbye scene beyond what we got in s03e07 Check-Up. But a special place in my heart for the first piece of writing that came out of me after a 7 year nothing. And I really would describe it as having "come out of me". It's special because I don't glom onto ships ever, but I was very affected by Trapper and Hawkeye. I'm still plenty interested in them separately, but they're the only time I've ever felt this way about a ship, so it's nice to know what that feels like.

--

i thank her all the time but a very special shout out to @marley-manson who frequently edits my work, is a willing sounding board for my head canons and has been along for most of my public fandom journey. and to my long-suffering trapper, @ummide who doesn't go here but enthusiastically yes-ands me every time i message them about The Blorbos anyway.

[foreverautumn89]

@messrsbyler

PS. **Was going to just re-blog but I honestly struggle with what the correct way to do that was. When the messages get too long I just create a new post so hope thats ok.**

I hope you know how much you're appreciated. I try to show my appreciation by liking your posts or commenting/reblogging, but now I'm just going to say it outright that I really appreciate you adding whatever content you can to keep the tag up and running.

In reply to our conversation/the reblog:

Yeah its a little silly that I can't talk about an st ship or a fav character from ST with the ST fandom. I've come across a lot of toxic fandoms, but this one is a little too backwards for me.

If I want to talk about it, I have to either: -talk about it with friends who I've talked about it with a million times before and we just end up having repeated conversations most of the time -or talk to people who don't know what ST even is [usually friends] and they try to be nice about it, but don't even know what I'm talking about so it kind of falls on deaf ears

It's ok honestly about me stepping aside, it does suck I can't talk about ST with the ST fans that is a REALLY crazy concept to me, but I think I'm better off just keeping my love for Stonathan and Jonathan to myself [at least when it comes to interacting with ST fans online] so I can enjoy it at least without all the unnecessary drama. It was supposed to be fun, not this constant battle with the fans. The fights and the battles just aren't worth it. I'm still baffled about the fans treating Jonathan like hes the main villain of the show, but it is what it is.

There are rare times I come across a Stonathan post that has a lot of notes/likes, but then I quickly find out thats because most of them think its a joke. Either they say it in their reblogs or the comments. Stuff like 'that's so funny' when the post was not intended to be funny or they insult the ship some other way.

I've never come across a fandom this crazy and thats saying something. I used to question a lot where all the fans had gone too because back in the day back in S1 time, I remember a lot of people being into Stonathan and now they all left. But considering the stuff I had to deal with the last year and all the hate towards Jonathan, I can understand perfectly why they left and don't seem to interact with the rest of the st fandom anymore. It just sucks that we don't get to see their content anymore because the fanbase scared them away. I even had a friend on here recently that stopped coming to this site all together because of the Jonathan/Stonathan hate so now we lost their Stonathan/Jargyle content too. But I can understand needing to get away because they want to enjoy it and you can't enjoy it with the majority ST fans because they suck the happiness and fun out of everything.

I try to block the anti-Jonathan people/anti-Stonathan people so I don't have to deal with their nonsense, but it seems to be the majority of the fanbase and I can't block almost the entire fanbase.

That's what I was doing before too-carrying the Stonathan ship on my back. I wasn't carrying the ship alone there was like 10 other people here. But it was exhausting and burnt me out trying to make content daily. Theres still a lot of stuff I haven't even posted that I don't have time to edit. It doesn't help that my last computer died and I have to remake the stuff that wasn't backed up so now I need to re-do stuff like the videos.

I will offer a piece of advise-when I couldn't find Stonathan content on here, I would go to other sites for crumbs of it like twitter in particular I found Stonathan content being added on a weekly basis at least.

Exactly-its definitely not a joke or a crack ship for me either. Especially since its right on the show its canon that Steve changed for the better because of Jonathan and Jonathan saved Steve in more ways than one that night-that alone should make it a popular ship. Ever since the end of S1, almost all of Steve's whole storyline has been about him being in love with Jonathan and becoming a better person for him/because of him and putting Jonathan's and his friends/family needs and wanted ahead of his own. And people just ignore that and act like its a joke for them to be paired together. It blows my mind. I just don't get it. Meanwhile, in other fandoms there are enemies to lovers ships and in canon they don't have what Stonathan has-showing in canon that someone has changed for the better because of this person canonly and showing how much they care for them. Steve even gave up Nancy at the end of S2 and told her you should go with Jonathan-that wasn't for Nancy's benefit it was for Jonathan's. He put Jonathan's happiness needs and wants before his own.

Also, their relationship is so messy and complex has so much depth to it-honestly I don't know why its not more popular, but then again its also not my problem to fix. If they want to miss out on Jonathan and Stonathan, that is their choice. I don't need their Steddie-like level of content because I got my own. So I can't be too worried or bothered by it.

Its like Drarry from HP and that is the most popular ship for Harry Potter. You'd think Stonathan would be a lot more popular too… Steve is a nicer person than Draco since Draco never adopted a group of kids and took care of them and Draco didn't start changing for the better until the end of the series, but considering all that you'd think Stonathan would be a more popular ship just a little bit at least.

Thank you. I appreciate it. It would be nice to have someone to talk to about the ship besides the same few people I've been talking to about it. Not that I don't enjoy it, but its become a bit of an echo chamber and us just rehashing things we have already said before.

And I love that you're such a huge fan of Jonathan! I love finding people like you. It's like finding a unicorn or something seriously. It's not often you can meet a genuine Jonathan fan in the ST fandom [as ridiculous as that sounds].

[dcviated]

salty with a chance of peeveballs :: open

@babelmedicus sent: ♦☀✂

♦ What was a mildly annoying thing that has happened to you rp wise?

Ehhh hmmm. Well. There was a blog who followed me multiple times, so I figured they really wanted to write with me so fuck it lets give em a chance! (foreboding music sting). I tried to get a couple things going with them. Sending asks. A thread that engaged both our (supposed) interests.

And while they remained otherwise active I just waited. Waited. Messaged them like "sup?" and got "sorry busy"

And then it came.

The "ive got too many asks so I'm deleting my inbox 🥺" despite rbing memes on a near weekly basis.

God.

☀ What's your rp pet peeve?

^^^^^^^^^^^^

THAT.

Is my new big huge peeve. When people fish and fish and fish for asks and interactions, answer nothing while making promises of coming activity, and then end up deleting it all anyway going "oops anyway here's another meme (:" it's pretty disingenuous.

RP is a hobby. Absolutely. But you need to have some discipline and honesty with yourself. This hobby is built around our word and if I can't trust yours then I'm not sticking around.

I've cut off a few follows for this now.

✂ A fandom that you feel isn't open and accepting?

Some of the current popular franchises feel like they can be rough to get into. Fi.re Emblem in particular is one that I always had trouble witho despite my OC at the time playing perfectly into the verse. The FE blogs I did write with were my friends already from elsewhere.

That's... more or less still the case actually HA.

I don't really associate with fandom rpc anyway, even if I'm writing muses from said fandom. When I approach blogs it's for the writing first, then the muse. And I've noticed when people follow me explicitly for mine (like they didnt read certain rules).

[arialerendeair]

I’m so glad @sniperct added those tags before I got to the bottom of the post because I was about to scream SO LOUDLY about people not realizing rereads are some of the reason why you have low engagement in other stats.

You can only hit the kudos button once. You could reread a fic a hundred times and the author would have absolutely no idea. I have fics that I can say I have read several dozen times. Easily. I’ve kudos’d them, and commented on some, but that’s it. These are fics I love so much I’ve downloaded them and would be devastated to lose them. Should I make it a point to tell the authors that? Yes. Am I still very bad at that? Yes.

Practical example!

Colour Forecasting - a fic @blueberrymffn and I have written posts weekly. We’re both productive and relatively popular authors in our fandom of choice. Out of curiosity, I track our stats for our weekly postings. We get an additional 2-7 kudos a week. That’s it. We get maybe 1 more bookmark. We do get between 400-600 hits. We can either get discouraged that we only got 5 kudos - or we can be psyched that we have 500ish people reading the fic like a periodical, eager for the next chapter!

Stats are always what you make them.

I’ve been tracking mine for almost 4 full years now, on a weekly basis, through 2-3 fandoms. There’s not really been a decline in overall engagement (and different fandoms have different levels and different types of engagement), as much as the following facts just… tend to be true.

Having a variety of fic lengths available for readers gets you more engagement

Posting relatively often (2-3 fics a month), gets you more engagement

Responding to comments gets you more engagement

Having more works in a given fandom gets you more engagement

Interacting in fandom spaces - Discord, Twitter, Tumblr, etc - gets you more engagement

Interacting with other creators gets you more engagement

Participating in fandom events gets you more engagement

Do you have to do all of these? No, of course not. But in tracking my stats and looking at trends, and watching them, and seeing how my fics and stats are reflected in them? They tend to be true, more often than not.

In my experience - unless you have a way to healthily engage with stats, it’s often better not to look at them, or to think too hard about them. Some of the joy can be sucked out of fanworks as a result.

Treat yourself kindly out there, loves.

I’ve seen five different authors take down, or prepare to take down, their posted works on Ao3 this week.  At the same time, I’ve seen several people wishing there was more new content to read.  I’ve also seen countless posts by authors begging for people to leave comments and kudos. 

People tell me I am a big name fan in my chosen fandom.  I don’t quite get that but for the purposes of this post, let’s roll with it.  On my latest one shot, less than 18% of the people who read it bothered to hit the kudos button.  Sure, okay, maybe that one sort of sucked.  Let’s look at the one shot posted before that - less than 16% left kudos.  Before that - 10%, and then 16%.  I’m not even going to get into the comments.  Let’s just say the numbers drop a lot.  I’m just looking at one shots here so we don’t have to worry about multiple hits from multiple chapters, people reading previous chapters over, etc.  And if I am a BNF, that means other people are getting significantly less kudos and comments.

Fandom is withering away because it feels like people don’t care about the works that are posted.  Why should I go to the trouble of posting my stories if no one reads them, and of the people who do read them, less than a fifth like them?  Even if you are not a huge fan of the story, if it kept your attention long enough for you to get to the bottom, go ahead and mash that kudos button.  It’s a drop of encouragement in a big desert. 

TL;DR: Passively devouring content is killing fandom.

[satorhime]

˚‧ ✿ ♡²˖ ࣪  ་ SATORHIME'S FIC REC FRIDAY !

hi hi ⁽ ˘ ˑ ˘ ⁾ ‹𝟹 i decided to start a lil fic rec friday to highlight and boost the beautiful writing that i read on an almost daily basis. i will do my best to keep this up weekly or bi-weekly (depending on my schedule) and i hope this helps you a bit if you're wondering what juicy piece to read next. i used content warnings from the authors' fics to give you an idea of what to expect beforehand, but please remember to thoroughly read content warnings and respect creators' blog rules before you interact with any of them. and also, please show more love to the pieces you read. if you liked, highly consider reblogging + commenting. it helps others find content to read too and i promise you'll make an author's day ! fandoms: jjk, tokrev, genshin, and aot genre(s): dark content, smut, fluff, hurt/comfort

ALWAYS, FOREVER ! ── with getou suguru, jjk ꒰ AUTHOR: dilly ♡ @atsumeii ꒱

lovesick dom!suguru x fem!reader, cumplay/cum eating, nippleplay, smol ! handjob ! petname (baby, angel, sweetheart, etc.), breeding, tiny dumbification, mentions of marriage/having kids, creampies, a clit kiss.

CATCH ME IF YOU CAN ── with getou suguru, jjk ꒰ AUTHOR : pooh ♡ @poohbea ꒱

detective!geto, criminal!reader, established backstory, implied past relationship, a knife is used, swearing, trespassing.

CRUEL INTENTIONS ── with multiple characters, jjk꒰ AUTHOR : jes ♡ @vilsoo ꒱

manipulation, toxicity, taboo, gangbang/train, professor(s) x student, double penetration, oral (m.receiving), unprotected sex, bukkake, slight sir kink.

DON'T GET SHY ON ME NOW ── with multiple characters, genshin ꒰ AUTHOR :abby ♡ @munsonsins ꒱

afab! reader, size kink, mating press, pussydrunk itto, mirror sex, v slight humiliation kink, brat taming, masturbation, fingering, overstim, edging, exhibition, pussy slaps, dacryphilia, mutual masturbation, sex toys (vibrator), pet names (princess, baby, darling)

FUCK ME, LIKE YOU HATE ME ── with hanma shuji, tokrev ꒰ AUTHOR : denice ♡ @fushisslut ꒱

slight!dubcon, public sex, unprotected sex, creampies, degradation (reader degrades hanma), timeskip!hanma, pussy drunk!hanma.

FEELS JUST LIKE A DREAM ── with chifuyu matsuno, tokrev ꒰ AUTHOR : sosa ♡ @sailewhoremoon ꒱

all characters mentioned are 18+, college student!reader, toman!chifuyu, black fem!reader, thick!reader, fluff, comfort, mild suggestive content, lovesick!chifuyu

"HOW TO HAVE A BABY WITH TWO DADS" ──── with itadori yuuji, ryoumen sukuna, jjk ꒰AUTHOR: winter ♡ @yuujispinkhair ꒱

18+, smut, sukuna switches bodies with yuuji, they both have sex with reader, and both breed her. slight!dubcon (sukuna knows yuuji and reader want a baby, but obviously they aren't happy about sukuna taking over yuuji's body. reader consents, though!), creampie, lots of breeding, mentions of future pregnancy, dirty talk, light degradation, yuuji and reader are around 25.

HEAVEN, I'D LIKE A PIECE OF IT ──── with tobio kageyama, haikyuu ꒰AUTHOR: coco ♡ @tobiodose ꒱

tobio kageyama x f!reader.  nsfw, inexperienced tobio, making out, nipple play spit/drool dry humping, kissing over clothes, tobio finishes in his pants

HOME IS WHEREVER I'M WITH YOU ──── with miya atsumu, haikyuu ꒰AUTHOR: haley ♡ @bbyatsumu ꒱

smut (mdni), themes of mental health (reader feels like their life is out of control / mentions of anxiety, but no mentions of depression and no heavier themes of mental health), slight angst, emotional sex + love confessions, childhood best friends to lovers, pining, oral (f! receiving), cursing, fingering, gn pronouns but female anatomy, atsumu has body hair + mentions of scars and stretch marks, bathhouse (inaccurate depictions, but this is fiction so that’s fine), bathing together (non sexually), mentions of The Notebook (they watch it as a movie night), fantasizing (sexual), teasing, open-ended ending (slight angst, but hopeful)

IT'S YOU ──── with fushiguro megumi, jjk ꒰AUTHOR: ♡ @25306 ꒱

college au, fluff, mutual pining, friends to lovers? fingering, cunnilingus, face sitting, fellatio, unprotected sex, creampie, praising, slight femdom, sub! Megumi, dry humping, breast/nipple play, cum eating, hair pulling, hand job, sixty-nine position.

LIGHTWEIGHT IN LOVE ──── with gojo satoru, jjk ꒰AUTHOR: sheer ♡ @sheerxfiction ꒱

fem!reader, alcohol, fluff, even fluffier sleepy confessions.

MESSAGES SENT WITH INVISIBLE INK ──── with multiple characters, jjk ꒰AUTHOR: ares ♡ @lawscorazon ꒱

jjk men sending nudes/traps, mix of gn and afab reader, pre-established relationships, sexting (duh), suit kink, toxic ex-boyfriend!geto, suggestive/smut, brief mention of oral sex (m receiving), daddy kink, masturbation

NEEDY ──── with eren yeager, aot ꒰AUTHOR: venus ♡ @venusflytrapstar ꒱

non-con recording, size kink, slight corruption kink, inappropriate relationships (step siblings), unprotected sex, fingering, blowjobs.

OLD GOLD ── with wakasa imaushi, takeomi akashi, tokrev ꒰ AUTHOR : saint ♡ @killsaki ꒱

spit roast, fingering, unprotected sex/creampie, semi-public sex, exhibitionism-ish (heard not seen), pet names (princess, little girl, baby, etc), praise, light degradation, burn play (cigarette ashes), age gaps (reader is early 20s, waka/takeomi/shin are pushin 30), she/her pronouns, reader wears a skirt, corruption kink

SEVEN MINUTES IN HEAVEN ── with multiple characters, jjk ꒰ AUTHOR : emmie ♡ @garoujo ꒱

 mini series, f. reader, college!au, aged!up characters, exhibitionism, unprotected sex / creampies, fingering / oral, quickie-esque sex, seven minutes in heaven scenarios.

SHY GIRLS ARE JUST MY TYPE! ── with multiple characters, genshin ꒰ AUTHOR : lulu ♡ @ickyism ꒱

fem!sub!reader, established relationship, you guys finally get romantic thoma,body worship, praise kink, ayato tries to fuck moans out of you, mirror sex with childe, strap-on (arlecchino), cunnilingus, fingering.

TEACH ME SOMETHING ── with fushiguro toji ꒰AUTHOR: jojo ♡ @deathskid ꒱

age gap (reader in early 20s), unprotected sex, fingering, squirting, virginity loss, praise & degradation, daddy kink, stomach bulge, overstim, breeding kink

WHEN YOU SAY MY NAME, NOTHING'S CHANGED ── with nanami kento ꒰AUTHOR: tee ♡ @hanmas ꒱

nsfw and 18+ content, fem! reader, post-shibuya incident, nanami lives, he’s having a hard time adjusting to his scars :(, insecure nanami, hints at ptsd, mentions of marriage and having children, body worship, blowjobs, cum swallowing, unprotected sex, creampie

4:37AM ── ── with pantalone, genshin impact ꒰AUTHOR: vyn ♡ @beelenciaga ꒱

somnophilia, cockwarming, belly bulge, use of pet/endearment names “darling”, “dove”, “dear”, soft + passionate sex, breeding, unprotected sex, praise, fem bodied reader.

[cinnamonest]

This is a legitimate question and I’m not trying to sound rude or offensive this is genuine curiosity because your blog is literally built on this so I’m sorry if I sound rude but may I ask if you ever get tired from writing or consuming noncon/misogyny/incest/etcetera media? Because I used to find it enjoyable to consume in the past but now I feel like I’m desensitized and just be like “yeah this might as well happen” and I only really read this kind of stuff on like a bi-weekly or so basis but you do it on a more daily basis so... was wondering if you ever get sick of it? Sorry if this is too personal and invasive. Feel free to ignore me if it makes you uncomfortable!!

You're fine! Don't worry everyone has individual likes and preferences and the like and it's totally normal for those to shift around every now and then!

Personally though no I don't really tire of it. I'm desperately trying to find a way to word this next sentence that doesn't sound super pretentious and I don't intend it that way but, sometimes interacting with/consuming mainstream fandom can get very exhausting and emotionally draining for me. It's actually too lighthearted/wholesome for my tastes and if I consume a lot of lighthearted content that portrays characters as like, really morally good wholesome people, or ships in a very consensual wholesome way, it has the same effect on me that I imagine dark content has for a lot of "normal" people -- it's jarring and can make me kinda uncomfy and drained. This is like a safe secluded spot I can come to to recharge every day!

And -- again I'm trying to think of how to say this without sounding pretentious but I feel like it comes off that way anyway ahhh -- I feel like my content might be a bit rougher/darker/more icky/rapey, than even most "yandere" spaces? I could be wrong on that, and again I don't mean that to be pretentious, but basically I created this space because I decided to make stuff that was dark/extreme enough for my preferences, because I couldn't find a lot of stuff that already existed that was "rapey" enough for me. So I basically thought "well if it doesn't exist, I'll make it myself" if that makes sense. So again this serves as a space where I can get that fix I need.

Its probably a mix of factors -- if you enjoy more normal/wholesome stuff in addition to this kind of stuff, it's probably just your preferences leaning one way or another, as all people tend to do! I alternate between flavors of what I make all the time -- sometimes I'm in a more incesty mood, sometimes more normal noncon, sometimes more modern au kinda vibe, etc, and that's all the variety I need. You probably just have variances in what you like from day to day and that's totally normal.

[sapphicscholar]

A/N: Note the fic earns its rating in this third and final chapter! Thanks for the lovely comments and warm welcome to the fandom!

Fic Preview:

There are so many little things Shona misses about pre-quarantine life. (There are the big ones, of course, like a lack of constant fear and dread, but she can’t dwell on those. She just can’t.) She misses going out to eat on the weekends. She misses seeing friends and colleagues and clients in person. Misses popping into stores and not cringing when she brushes shoulders with a stranger. But right now, as she wakes up for the third morning in a row from a very, very vivid dream about Charlotte—and thank god Aine’s taken to sleeping in Bradley’s room of late—she misses her own bed and her own space and having five fucking minutes in an apartment all to herself.

“Shona!” Aine’s voice seems to echo through the very walls, and Shona bites down on her knuckles to keep from screaming.

Still, Shona knows that if she doesn’t respond, there’ll be a second, louder call in just a minute. So she pulls herself up and out of bed, poking her head into the hallway and yelling back: “What?”

“Bradley’s making eggs. Want some?”

“Sure,” she sighs. Because this is her life now. Having sex dreams about the only person outside of this apartment that she talks to on a daily basis and sharing an intimate morning-after breakfast with her baby sister and her boyfriend—or whatever the fuck he is.

Shona will later blame the weight of this horrifying realization for her decision to pull out her phone and send Charlotte a message consisting of little more than, “As of this week, I am officially the only person in this apartment not getting laid. Clearly I should only be paying half-rent.”

A month ago, it would have been the kind of text that would have led to weeks of awkward, stilted interactions. These days, they’re more open with each other, no longer tiptoeing around their history. Still, it comes as a bit of a surprise when Charlotte sends back: “A woman I met on one of those horrible apps drunkenly sent me an eight-part message about her fisting fantasy last night. Want to trade?”

Shona smirks, types without really thinking. “Did you tell her you only like to be on the giving end of that particular fantasy?”

“Eggs are ready!” Aine yells, and Shona can hear Bradley’s low, rumbling laugh, followed by: “I could have yelled it, too.”

Shona pulls on a sweatshirt and pads out into the kitchen, giving them both a little wave and trying not to feel nauseated at how disgustingly happy they look.

Read the rest on AO3!

[sideblog-usernametaken]

I think the main issue is that the gaps between episodes leave people with too much time to make headcannons and assumptions which in turn distorts people's perceptions and expectations of the show.

Like, remember how people were saying Stella got "retconned" when it was "revealed" she's been extremely abusive to Stolas both verbally and physically? Even though in her appearances before that episode she was always either screaming at him, throwing things at him, or literally hiring a hit man to kill him? That's because a significant part of the fandom decided those reactions were purely in response to Stolas cheating on her. They knew Stolas was cheating to begin with, so they immediately pinned him as the bad guy which meant his wife had to just be a victim of his, otherwise the show was favoring him too much. They never thought about why Stolas was completely unsurprised by her lashing out like this or why he felt the need to immediately get Octavia away from her or why he obviously felt more remorseful for upsetting Octavia than Stella.

This kind of treatment also gets expanded to basically every female character who yells at the protagonists. Barbie is being "vilified" because she chewed out Blitzø, even though she is the very first character to chew him out who he doesn't snap at at all. Uncharacteristically, he doesn't get mad at her or blame her for hating him. He takes it all and lets her leave because the entire episode frames her as being in the right and that Blitzø needs to respect her wishes and leave her alone. Which these people missed because they think the show coddles Blitzø and they thought Verosika was being vilified because she was the antagonist in one episode.

They correctly identified that she was in the right, but instead of coming to the conclusion that the writers did that intentionally to make a point they assumed it was misogyny. "The protagonist isn't the good guy it's the guy the story's about" is lost on them. Even when the narrative treated Fizz like one of Blitzø's exes, made it so that Fizz was the one in the right, and implied that all of Blitzø's relationships were like that, these people still thought the show was trying to say Blitzø was right about Verosika. Because that's what they'd been telling themselves for months at that point and being wrong about that means they might be wrong about all their other headcannons.

This show is 17 episodes in. 17 episodes. A standard season length for animated shows is around 24 episodes, and I know of series that would take two seasons to get to where Helluva Boss is right now without anyone complaining. The difference is those shows come out on weekly basis while Helluva Boss gives the fan base months to stew and interact with more fan content than there is show content.

Even with the most recent episode I see people still willfully misinterpreting the entire series up to this point to complain about issues the show doesn't have. Like, I saw a post earlier today saying that Stolas abused Stella and thus Blitzø doesn't owe him an apology (They did have more steps connecting those two thoughts but I'm simplifying here).

Heck, I've seen people saying that Stolas shouldn't be mad that Blitzø never told him someone was trying to kill him because "Stella made the call right in front of him so he should've known". The issue isn't that he didn't know he was in danger (He started epsiode 2 saying people would be out to get him and he was proven right through the whole thing) the issue is that Blitzø never said anything even though he knew Stolas didn't know about Striker because he explicitly told him he felt safe at the festival and wouldn't bring body guards. Yes, Stolas has a right to be upset that Blitzø knew in advance about the one guy who's ever actually hurt him and didn't bother to give him a warning or just feel bad about not giving him a warning even though he got kidnapped.

It's just, so exhausting being a fan of this show. On one side there's the people who hate watch it and will quite literally never be happy, then there are the fans who get too deep into fandom who will also never be happy with the show itself. It makes looking for any kind of balanced opinion or nuance near impossible.

it's really cool that they posted this warning, but when you stop and think about it, it's kind of sad because media literacy is SO dead

part of me want to know how these people act when they read a book, do they think the book is problematic and the author doesn't know what they are doing because the conflicts weren't addressed in the first chapters? do they really want everything to be addressed out loud in a such non organic way? (especially when it is a work for adults who should already know what is right and wrong)

seriously, how do these people want a series to work? address all the issues in the first 5 eps and all other seasons be just coffee shop au and beach episode?

and this big bad faith with the writers too, looks like people can no longer think "i hope this conflict is addressed in future episodes"

they think that "this conflict was not addressed in this episode, so it will never be addressed and the writers suck", especially when it is a major conflict that involves the protagonist and other characters from the main cast

people want to watch series with character arcs but without the character arc

these tweets from morgana are from a year ago and it's still so real

[readerinsertfanfiction]

The Bae’st of All

Fandom: Ikemen Sengoku

Character: Kyubae the bae’st bae of all aka Kyubei

Prompt: Seeing how Kyubei is named after an alias that the real Mitsuhide Akechi used (Juubei) the chances of fans getting a Kyubei route from Cybird are slim. However, it is simply impossible not to fall for this man. He is too good. So here have my attempt at writing a route.

A/N: Longer chapter this month and no, that isn’t the reason why I’m not back on my weekly nonsense. 

The key of the previous chapter was (Romantic/Dramatic):

+2/+4

+4/+4

+4/+2

Chapters:

1.1| 1.2 | 2.1 | 2.2 | 3.1 | 3.2 | 4.1

Avatar Challenge 1| 3.1 Gacha POV | 1st Letter

Keiji wore an impish smile as he smiled down at me, his eyes crinkling into half moons.

“Well? I know that Kyubei went back to work already.”

Shifting in my seat I wondered if Keiji had been watching me, as he flashed me another bright smile, a hand reaching out to me as he pulled me up.

“Come on, let’s go. Knowing Mitsuhide he really didn’t bother having you shown around properly so far, and knowing Kyubei he has been far too busy to take you out properly. Let me fix that!”

Excited Keiji bounded off, my hand tightly held in his as I flash a look of regret at the sweets and tea I had barely started on.

“Ah, Keiji!”

A friendly old man calls out to us, seated cross legged on the ground he has a drum in his lap, dressed in decorative robes as he waves us over.

“Old man!”

Keiji responds with a beaming grin, earning the look of similarly dressed people, some holding instruments, others in the middle of some warmup poses.

“Is that the new princess the castle town has been talking about? She is much prettier than our princess.”

The ‘old man’ gestures at me, letting go of a dry laugh at my blush. Somewhere in the back a girl dressed in brighter and bolder colours than the rest gives the man a playful push, a huff escaping her lips.

“I just need to dance like one, not look the part.”

Her answer earns her another round of taunts from the rest as they push and pull between their teases as I watch them with some envy.

(They’re all so comfortable with each other, like a bunch of childhood friends, or one big family.)

“They’re not much different from our antics, you know?”

Keiji’s words pull me out of my thoughts as I blink at him, wondering how he managed to read my thoughts so easily.

“Everyone wants to get to know the chatelaine better, but as long as she remains afraid there is little we can do.”

Keiji’s words struck me as I blink up at him, confusion settling over my expression as I wordlessly sounded my question.

“I don’t think Kyubei minds your company, but there is no need for you to actually study so hard. Nobunaga would be just as pleased to have you lean back and indulge in the luxuries provided.”

A bad feeling rises over me, clambering around my heart as I eye Keiji, trying to discern the true meaning of his words.

(I thought I was brought to the Akechi manor to teach me proper manners, but are they saying that I have been sheltered instead? That they were worried that I would be uncomfortable and hence let me stay outside of the castle?)

“Ah, no need to look guilty. No one thinks you are a burden, or a nuisance. We just want you to be comfortable, even Mitsuhide.”

Letting the words sink in I realise the consideration everyone has ever had for me. The presents that the warlords kept on sending me, their occasional visits, and the kindness in which Kyubei taught me despite his own work.

(They have been nothing but kind to me.)

“Hey, cheer up. There is no time to lament, dance!”

Keiji’s voice pulls me out of my thoughts once more as he leads me into a circle where the rest of the troupe is as well. When the old man hits the drum I realise that they are about to start their performance, expectant eyes from the crowd slowly coming to a stop as they eye me.

“I can’t dance!”

(I need to get out of here!)

“No!”

No matter the protests I’m already brought into the crowd before I know it, stringed along to dance with Keiji as the crowd cheers.

(This is actually kinda fun?)

The sound of music slowly takes away my embarrassment and before I know it I’m immersed into their music, enjoying my time here.

“Told ya, there is nothing much to fear, princess.”

Keiji smiles brightly at me afterwards, his cheeks slightly flushed from the exercise, but content.

“Next time I will play an instrument for you, old man!”

His energy seems endless as he continues to banter with the troupe, an instrument pushed into his hands as he plays a little tune each time. I realise that Keiji is familiar with all of the instruments introduced.

In awe I look upon him in amazement, not noticing the rough shoulder that pushes me to the side as the crowd disperses itself, a mean looking man stepping forward.

“What are you low-lives doing here?”

(Yikes, we got a bully there.)

The man and his friend surround the troupe, hands settled upon their swords as they glower down the group, aiming for the old man specifically.

“You are hinin, return to your rightful place outside of the castle-town.”

The man spoke sternly as he kicked out the drum from the old man’s hands. The troupe stilled, their expressions taut as they glower the man down.

“We are at the border of the castle-town. Surely we can play music here?”

The response of the old man is calm and unflinching, as if he has experienced this on a daily basis. It hurts to think that he might.

“Didn’t you hear me? You vile people should leave at once before we cut you up!”

The threat rings through the air as my eyes widen. Without another thought I rush in, spreading my arms out as I stand between them.

“H-hey now, there is no reason to treat people like that. They’re making an honest living, not?”

To this Keiji steps into view as well, slinging an arm around the man with the sword as he smiles gingerly.

“Listen to the lady, she is right, they aren’t bothering anyone, but you are bothering them, not?”

“Lord Keiji!”

The man’s lofty attitude instantly crumbles at the sight of Keiji as the other shrugs his shoulders.

“Wish you could keep that attitude up, scram off and don’t let me hear of this again.”

The words Keiji spoke are unlike the bright bubbly character that I have come to know so far. His expression now severe as he watched the men scramble off, clearly not ready for a confrontation with the real authority.

“You have guts, princess. I knew I didn’t misjudge you. After all, you saved Nobunaga.”

Keiji addresses me once more, his expression back to the bright and bubbly persona from earlier, though I can still see the traces of his earlier irritation.

“Now, you just have to reach out for that courage and I’m sure you'll fit right in with the rest of us.”

(Is he comforting me?)

Confused I turn my eyes to the rest of the troupe, the dancers and musicians looking dejected as they gather their things again.

“Thank you. You shouldn’t have to. You know how common it is for us to face such discrimination.”

The old man addresses the both of us as he slowly gets up from his place.

(Common? That is awful, why would they…)

“Common or not, it shouldn’t be tolerated. Not as long as Nobunaga rules here.”

Keiji’s tone is clipped as he says this, but his smile returns soon enough as he pats the old man on his shoulder.

“We shouldn’t punish you for losing your original home. Not when we are the cause of it.”

I’m still not quite following as I watch Keiji interact. It is only after that the troupe has left to return to their homes outside of the castle town that I dare to ask.

“What are hinin?”

Keiji eyes me with surprise as he grimaces ruefully at me, a hand reaching out to pet my head.

“Under which stone did you crawl from?”

His tone is teasing, though sad as he retreats his hand, a sigh escaping him. For once Keiji’s expression is serious, though more out of respect for the topic than true sadness or pity.

“You know that there are classes, right? Though Nobunaga has abolished them now. Hinin are outcasts, so to say. Foreigners from other lands that have followed warlords in the hopes for a better future.”

I turn to look at the retreating figures of the troupe with a new understanding of their situation.

(How awful. To be discriminated against like that because of the place of birth.)

“Nobunaga values his people by merit. It helps people like them to climb up in ranks, fortunately. It isn’t much now, but hopefully in the future we can all stand equal.”

Keiji’s voice sounds hopeful as he expresses himself and I as well feel my heart lurch up, nodding in enthusiasm back at him.

(I can’t say anything now. But it will be better in the future.)

With that said Keiji returns me to the Akechi manor, his demeanour once more slipping back into his cheery self as he grins at me.

“I hope to see you back in Azuchi soon, princess. Everyone is looking forward to befriending you.”

Though I find it hard to imagine I’m starting to see the sense of it all as I nod in response. Keiji’s eyes crinkling into mischievous slits as he leans over.

“However, I think you will make a certain foxling lonely if you left so soon, so be sure to visit him often?”

I blink a few times as I wonder who Keiji is referring to, earning a boisterous laugh from the male as he pulls away, leaving me at the gate.

“Say hi to the two of them. I will skip by again when I feel like it.”

Raising up a hand he waves himself off without ever turning back.

[juuls]

What’s going on with me & why I won’t be writing for a while

I obviously have Bipolar II and have learned to ride the ups and downs pretty well in recent years, even if some things still surprise me on occasion. But what I’ve never been able to properly treat or learn to deal with is anxiety. I’ve always had GAD (general anxiety) but it’s been untreated since I had so much other shitty health to focus on. Prioritization, right? And I needed all my faculties to not end up dead at the hands or by the gun of my ex. Then, after I left, I was making strides in recovering from the severe abuse and trauma at my ex-husband’s hands, sharp tongue, and actions from July 2017 until... well, it’s still an ongoing process, but this whole year, part of 2019 too, has been a lot better on the healing front. The strides I was making helped me focus on things other than my anxiety, but after dealing with those things, the anxiety started crawling insistently in. And apparently in a far stronger version than GAD.

Didn’t help that I finally felt up to checking out what was going on in the world more often (what great timing, brain; nice sense of humour). And it’s been good for me, it has... in that I’ve become better educated in the awfulness of the world, which has allowed me to call out racists, ‘Truthers’, and other asshole bigots who remind me of my ex. The downside of all that is that I am way over-empathetic and am appalled at the absolute.... *makes incoherent helpless noises*... just, appalled at EVERYTHING. And I am afraid. And worried. And angry. And a slew of other words that I’m sure every one of you get. You’re all intelligent; you know what’s going on in the world.

And sometimes I devolve into apathy, sometimes sleepless nights (I get about 16-20 hours of sleep a WEEK right now, which should be in the 40-60 hour range, frankly), increased pain on top of the fuckton I’m already in, worsening migraines, dizziness, and the intrusive thoughts of my bipolar depression keep telling me there’s an easy way out of this all. That’s when I knew I needed to do something. So sitting down with my loving father and my caring psychotherapist, I put together a list of my symptoms, what I wanted to tackle most, what I was willing to let go, how all of it interacted (cocktail medications, which I’m already on, can be dangerous and deadly), and then put together a proposal for my doctor, who’s been my family practitioner for two decades.

When you hit the point of panic attacks weekly, and not being able to sleep, even with a double dose of your sleep medication... when you don’t want to watch the things that bring you some modicum of joy for fear of aspects reminding you about the real world... when you wish you simply didn’t exist anymore... you need help. I needed help, and I won’t shy away from discussing that in a public setting, for the simple fact that someone who reads this might need to hear that it’s not the end all be all, not the end of the line, not the end of your life. So with the support of my father and my therapist, who I spoke to last night and this morning, respectively, in advance of my doctor’s appoint this afternoon... My doctor listened attentively to me and gave me permission to go on benzodiazepines again. I will be taking one daily, the one that doesn’t have nearly as great a spike of effect, but lasts longer and steadier, and will also be taking the other, spikier one, as the equivalent of a rescue inhaler for the next panic attack.

I’m not trying to hide from what’s going on in the world. But there is a line I need to learn to respect in how much news I look for, how I consume it, and how I let myself run away with myself at any injustice I see. And fuck, there is a lot. I will still be keeping abreast of the news, still educating myself, still engaging in discussions with people I trust to be kind to my mental state as best they can in the situation, and other things. This will simply make it so I don’t devolve into an incoherent mess of a breakdown/panic attack, and most importantly it will keep me from suicide. It’s never been much of a threat for me, but lately...? Let’s just say I am a bit more concerned than usual.

Gotta love brains, eh? Mental illness sucks. But this is one way I can take control. Other ways include the Nutrisystem diet I recently started, going for regular walks with my pupper and dad, reading 42 Sci-Fi/Fantasy books and counting in 2020, breathing exercises, removing harmful elements from my life even if that pains me in the moment...  at least I’m making progress in other areas than just medication.

But what does this mean for my writing? Well. Good question. The last few times I took the stronger of these two medications (on a more daily, vs rescue, basis), well, I didn’t write hardly at all. I have hopes for being able to write during this, with the more steady medication, but I also have to feel happy to write, and the state of the world isn’t going to give me much opportunity to feel that for months yet, if not years (go and goddamn vote)... so yeah. But I realized that I don’t put myself first in big ways like this. And this time I need to. If the writing happens, that’s wonderful. If it doesn’t? Well, I’ll settle for less anxiety and not being dead, and I hope that that’s okay with y’all. I know it’s frustrating when a favourite author takes ages to update, and I’ve always been fairly guilty of that... but you all know that I ALWAYS come back. That’s what I do. I love this community, this fandom, my beta, my readers... you make it all worth coming back to.

So please, all I ask is that you be patient with me. I’m experiencing a pretty severe mental health crisis and not holding on too solidly. But I’m thinking of you. Thinking of all of you, and just how much I appreciate you.

With love, Juulna / Meaghan

💋

(Bonus post: why I can’t write when my anxiety is out of whack. Quick answer: I am way too overempathetic and I get overwhelmed.)