#she may also have just been recovering from the stress of it + the fluids thing they gave her on her scruff.

[orcelito]

Little Tally has been plodding around and she was trying to get into a box earlier and she later came up to me and stared at me expectantly then later tried to eat my plants again and just now she came up to sit next to me purring again and leaning into my pets

The medicine really is making her feel better I think. And it's really highlighting how bad she Has been feeling. Bc these are all very basic things, but she hasn't been doing it. Even up to her little walk, the plodding sounds of her footsteps... before today, she was moving so stiffly, an awkward little shamble, so I couldn't even really hear her when she got up (which was nowhere near as much as normal). Something as simple as hearing her drinking water is making me emotional. If she starts yowling tonight when I go to bed I really might just cry.

I really hope this keeps up... she's got just one more day of meds, but maybe it'll be enough... I hope so...

[ithebookhoarder]

Prequel Star Wars (Head-canons): Dealing with a sick reader

A/N: After the request for these head canons for the original trio I kind of got inspired for the other trios too... oops?

Masterlist: 

Anakin:

Ok. There’s only one word for Anakin when you’re sick: worrier.

Yep. This man is on red alert real quick the minute you mention even thinking you feel a bit under the weather. In fact, he’d have you back in your chambers and buried under a pile of blankets before you can even try to tell him it isn’t necessary.

“You can’t be too careful, and you do feel rather warm. You may have a fever-”

“Anakin! Say that once you’ve felt my forehead again, but with your non-robotic hand this time.”

“Oh.”

It’s rather sweet actually, watching the way Anakin scurries about getting anything and everything you could possibly need. 

It’s also ironic considering this is the man who always insists he is fine, even when he has blaster wounds all over him. He may have been adversed to letting people take care of him, but he’s only too eager to take care of you. 

After all, since his mother died, you are all he really has in the way of family. He’s not about to let something as simple as a cold kill you. 

So, you let him fuss, knowing it’s just as good for him as it is for you, to let him play nurse maid for a while. 

“Do you need more pillows? I also can get Obi-wan to get some more of that tea you like from the market too if you want.” 

“I’m fine, Ani.”

“Are you sure? You still look pale-“

“Just come cuddle with me, ok? Just a for a while?”

Needless to say, he’s only too happy to cradle you in his arms and let you drift off to sleep against him, softly humming under his breath as he brushes the hair off of you face. 

This is how it stays for the next few days or so, until you’re finally strong enough to get back up and move around the temple. 

Even then, Anakin is like a shadow, following you around incase you’re wrong and it turns out you’re not strong enough yet to be up and about. 

“Ani, honey, I’m fine. I promise. I’m not made of glass, you don’t have to always worry something’s going to break me.” 

He knows you’re right, even if he’s reluctant to admit it. So, he settles for a kiss and a compromise that you at least let Ahsoka keep an eye on you while you work. It has been nearly a week since either of you left your quarters and people were going to start getting suspicious soon if he didn’t let you be by yourself. 

However, he doesn’t need to worry. 

It’s only a day later he starts coughing and feeling sick himself. 

It’s hard not to laugh at the irony as you take his arm and start hauling him back to bed, ready to return the favour. What was one more week of seclusion, just the two of you? At least this time you’d get to play nurse maid. 

Obi-Wan: 

Unlike Anakin, Obi-wan is rather calm when it comes to handling any kind of problem. So, when he finds you slumped over, face down, in the text you’d been trying to read in the archives, he merely chuckles.

“Darling, wake up. You fell asleep again.”

“Obi?” You blink, groaning as you try to sit up without falling over from the sudden dizziness you feel rushing through you.  

Of course, one look at you is enough to tell him something is definitely wrong with you. 

“Oh dear, you look dreadful.”

“Wow. Such a charmer.”

“I try,” he teases, helping you up and wrapping an arm around you as he starts to escort you back to your rooms. You need some rest, clearly, if you’ve become rundown enough to catch some kind of bug. It’s probably the same one that’s been going around the younglings recently.

“Here we are. Let’s get you changed and settled in to bed, alright?”

His voice is so soft and soothing as he mothers you, seeing to your every need with barely a complaint. He has you out of your robes and into something comfy in the blink of an eye. He also makes you some tea and retrieves some medication from his bathroom cabinet, insisting you take some before sleeping. 

Obi-wan is also a patient man. Being Master to Anakin for the last ten years has ensured that, meaning he is more than prepared for your whining and moaning. 

He simply smiles, laughing at the rather adorable pout you wear whenever he tries to get you to take some more medication or agree to stay in bed for another day. 

“But I have a report due tomorrow for Master Fisto-“

“I’ve already explained the situation to him. He has someone else finishing it for him.”

“Well, I also have that class with the younglings-”

“Which Master Yoda has also agreed to cover, so you have nothing to worry about except recovering, alright?”

It is alright, despite you pretending otherwise. When else do you get to spend so much time along together? In fact, despite feeling like death warmed up, you rather like letting him take care of you and entertaining you with whatever book he’s been reading lately. 

He always looks happiest when he has you nestled under his arm, and a book in his free hand. Needless to say, he has no problems reading you off to sleep every night, watching as you drift off by the time he’s finished another chapter. 

“Sleep well, my love.” 

And you do. You sleep remarkably well with Obi-wan next to you which is why, even after you’re better, you’re quick to invite him to sleep in your bed as many nights as you can.  

You’re also eager to return the favour and read to him instead, as he eventually falls asleep to the sound of your voice night after night. 

Who knew the great General Kenobi was so adorable when asleep?  

Padme:

Now, Padme may be royalty, but she is a public servant first and foremost. Her entire life is dedicated to the service of others, so when she sees you struggling to keep yourself upright at your desk, she is all over you. 

“Y/N? What is it? Are you feeling alright?” 

“I’m fine, Padme. It’s just stress.”

“Sure you are. Why else have you been staring at that page for the last hour and a half?” 

She pauses, frowning at you and trying not to roll her eyes at your stoic nature. On one hand, it’s rather ironic for her to scold you when she herself has been known to burn the candle at both ends. However, there comes a point when it was impossible to ignore your body’s obviously worsening condition. 

So, she swiftly orders you to bed and instructs a physician to check nothing is terribly wrong with you - even if you insist it isn’t necessary. 

“Well, it is to me, alright?” 

And of course, how can you say no to that sweet face when she pouts and bats her eyelids? 

“Ugh! Fine!”

One annoyingly tedious check up later, you’ve been diagnosed with a mild stomach bug and told to rest for the remainder of the week. 

“Here. I have some juice for you. You need fluids if you’re going to recover quicker.” 

You smirk at the idea that a queen is serving you as she bursts into your room the following day, carrying a tray laden with fruit and a pitcher of your favourite juice. 

You’re quick to thank her, downing the glass within seconds, much to her amusement. 

“Thirsty are we?”

“And bored,” you whine, grinning as Padme passes you a data pad with a knowing wink. “You angel!”

“Hardly. You get one hour to work, ok? Then I’m taking it back and you’re having a nap? Understood?”

It seems like a fair enough compromise as you sit up and read the briefings she’s downloaded for you. In fact, by the time your hour is up, your eyes are drooping and you’re struggling to sit up by yourself. 

“No protests? I am surprised.”

She clearly isn’t, but she’s too kind to say so as she kisses your forehead and clambers in to bed next to you as you nestle in close.

The soft scent of her perfume and the sound of her heartbeat is all the lullaby you need as you let yourself grab a few more hours of sleep. 

A few days of this routine, and of Padme’s diligent care, and you’re back to your old self in no time. 

In fact, a small part of you rather looks forward to the next time either one of you are sick given how nice it is to have the time to spend together. 

So, you still insist on taking a nap together every afternoon despite being off bed rest. “Merely as a precaution” - or so you insist as you steal Padme from her office every day without fail for a small escape. “Wouldn’t want our favourite Senator to fall sick now, would we?”  

[pilotcallsigns]

Start Again - Chapter Seven (Din Djarin x Reader)

SUMMARY: After being ambushed by the pair of Devaronians, you and the Mandalorian make the decision to expedite your journey into the city of Opseg. Upon your arrival, the city and its people welcome you with open arms and you find out more about what the Empire did to you while in their custody. 

CHAPTER WARNINGS: mentions of attack from the previous chapter, panic attacks, medical procedures including sedation, and VERY heavy discussion of forced sterilization. 

Author’s Note: This is my longest chapter yet at 3.2k words! I hope you enjoy this latest chapter and I hope I can be back on my regular update schedule. Feel free to reblog and like!

CHAPTER SEVEN - THE DIAGNOSIS

Trekking through the canyon might’ve been easier if you didn’t have such a debilitating headache. The bacta patch had healed the wound in your hairline, but your eye was still swelling and your head ached in a way that you hadn’t felt in months. In the back of your mind, a part of you really wished you had the Puvion leaves to alleviate the headache. The leaves had always worked better than any bacta spray or patch.

Your heart still raced at the thought of what happened earlier in the morning. Waking up to two Devaronians sniffing around your camp wasn’t exactly what you had in mind of a good morning. When they noticed you were awake, there was zero hesitation to take you out. They had even managed to do so quietly enough that it didn’t wake the Mandalorian.

The swelling at your eye aches as a reminder of how quickly they had managed to take you down. Your lack of training had made it easy, before you could even swing up your knife to defend yourself, the one Devaronian, Zek, punched you hard enough for you to see stars. There wasn’t much fight left in you after that.

When they noticed the Mandalorian, however, their motives changed. It wasn’t about kidnapping you and keeping you as their prize for the day, but instead getting the armor off the Mandalorian and selling it. Had they been successful they would’ve walked away with both you and possibly thousands of credits after pawning off the armor.  

But the Mandalorian had handled it, wielding his saber as he easily killed the two mercenaries. It still took your breath away thinking about how he had moved with it, fluid and precise. He may have held the weapon like it burned him, but he used it like second nature.

Your feet hit solid ground and you look up, eyeing the bustling city of Opseg around you. It was noisier than Tatooine. Children scream with joy as they run past you, disappearing into the crowd of people looking to buy the latest products. Fine jewelry and clothing were hung up on display, shopkeepers shouting prices to interested onlookers. The savory smell of vegetables cooking fills your nose and you turn to see another line of shops, these ones selling hot meals. The sights and sounds were both exciting and overwhelming all at the same time.  

“This is insane…” you say, laughing slightly. You had never experienced anything like this before, a city with life. Tatooine was nothing compared to this.

“It’s not insane, my dear! This is Opseg!” A voice shouts behind you, startling you. You turn and a green humanoid alien grins at you. The friendliness waving off this stranger is almost as overwhelming as Orus itself. You wondered if everyone on Orus was like this.

The Mandalorian steps just in front of you, putting a barrier between you and the stranger. You hadn’t hired him to be a bodyguard but given the events earlier this morning and your lack of training, you let it slide this time. Besides, you were tired of being snuck upon.

“Ah, apologies, my name is Ortib-Blik! But you can call me Obie for short,” The alien extends his hand out, clearing his throat when the Mandalorian doesn’t offer his hand in return. “I’m a tour guide here in Opseg. You looked lost, so I figured I’d offer my help.” He offers a sheepish smile when the Mandalorian doesn’t say anything.

“Hello Obie,” you greet, stepping to the side of the Mandalorian in order to introduce yourself. “We’re just passing through; we need to find a medcenter.”

“I’d assume it’s for that wound on your eye?” Obie asks, pointing at where your eye swells. You nod and he grins again. “Well, you’re just in luck, the medcenter is taking walk-ins today!”

“How much is a physical?” Mando asks from behind you.

“It’s free!” Obie exclaims, “Even to non-Orus citizens.”

“Is there work I can find here?” Mando asks and Obie’s expression changes.

“Yes, plenty! You look more like a hunter, so I’m sure if you were to stop by any of Opseg’s twenty cantinas you’d find something.”

You balk at the number, looking at the Mandalorian. You forget his facial expression is hidden by the helmet, but you can assume he’s also surprised. Twenty cantinas was an incredibly high amount and you couldn’t imagine the work going into finding a job would be worth it.  

“Thank you, Obie, but I think we’ll take it from here.” You offer a tight smile to the alien.

“Of course, of course! If you have any questions, don’t be afraid to shout!” He says, waving as he departs down the street.

“I think he was a lot nicer than the Devaronians that greeted us this morning,” you say, smiling when the Mandalorian sighs. “Too soon?” you chuckle.

“A little, yeah,” Mando says, turning around as he looked down the street. It seemed everywhere you look that it was teeming with life, people shouting and laughing. The shopkeepers yell over the playing children as parents stress over prices. This is way better than life on Puvo, you thought.

Puvo had its moments, the winter festival brought out a certain life in its citizens. Winter seasons were so rare that they celebrated the first indication of winter, whether it was a significant drop in temperature or animals beginning their hibernation. You had only ever experienced one festival and it was during the time your mind was still mending itself back together. But you remembered the laughing, the dancing, and the singing.

Valara had spent hours showing you how to braid her hair, repeating the motions over and over until you finally got it. She looked so happy dancing with that one boy from the neighboring village. Impressions meant everything on Puvo and she took it to heart when the boy didn’t offer another date after the festival. You had been too busy recovering to offer her any comfort, but Valara had moved on, throwing herself into work.  

They hadn’t even celebrated the last winter festival. There was too much work to be done, the council had announced. A cloud of depression remained over the village for some time. Valara mentioned it reminded her of when the Empire was still in power. The depressive atmosphere took a toll on your already weakened mental health. Try as she might, Valara’s grandmother struggled to pull you out of that episode. It had been one of the many deciding factors to leave Puvo, at least for the sake of your own well-being.

“We’re in the town square at the moment,” The Mandalorian says. The memories of Puvo fade as you focus your attention. “Medcenter shouldn’t be too far from here.”

“Right,” you murmur, “and what are you going to do while I’m being seen?”

“The guide said twenty cantinas, I have to start somewhere. Most of them are downtown. Small, shouldn’t be too hard to get through all of them before you’re done.” Mando replies, looking to you for confirmation. You nod.

The walk to the medcenter isn’t much. You manage to escape the craziness that’s the town square, there’s not as much yelling, but there’s still plenty of children running around their exasperated parents. It’s clear you’ve entered one of the housing areas, women and men alike staring as you both continue your path. The Mandalorian doesn’t seem to mind the stares. He’s probably used to it by now, you think.

The medcenter is daunting when you approach it. The all-white building amidst desert brown was shocking at first, freezing you in your movement as you stared at the twin doors in front of you. What if they found out something was wrong with you? What if it couldn’t be fixed? Your mind spirals at the idea of what could go wrong, words and thoughts jumbling together. Would they take you away from the Mandalorian? Send you back to Puvo so you can really get better? Institutionalize you? You weren’t that crazy…

“I can’t do this,” you whisper to the Mandalorian. He remains silent and you wonder if you’ve finally managed to make him angry.

“You can. I’ll be there with you the whole time.” He speaks.

“But-but you said you’d—”

“I know what I said earlier.” He murmurs, “But you’re clearly in distress and it’s better for me to stay close, especially in a city as big as this one. The cantinas can wait.”

You’re not sure if his words really soothe your nerves. Your heart is still racing at your earlier thoughts and it’s quickly becoming harder to breathe. He was promising to stay but would he be there when they read off what was wrong with you? Suddenly being on Puvo didn’t sound so bad after all.

You jump when the door opens behind you.

“Hello, I am Oralia. I am a nurse here at the Opseg Medical Center.” A Mirialan woman greets you. “Is there something I can help you with?”

The kindness in the woman’s voice makes you freeze again. You’re unsure what to say, what to tell her. Do you start with the current injuries you have? Do you tell her about your purpose for visiting before you were even attacked? Could she tell you were overloaded with anxiety? You were probably shaking like a wet Loth-cat.

“Miss, are you alright?” Oralia asks you and you shake your head. With gentle hands, she lifts your face, her warm eyes examining the wound by your eye and the peeling bacta patch. “Are you with her, sir?” Oralia asks the Mandalorian.

“Yes,” he replies.

“Let’s get her taken care of.” The nurse says, grasping your elbow with a comforting hand as she walks you through the doors. You can hear the Mandalorian’s boots just behind you as Oralia walks you past the front desk into a smaller room.

“Is she going to be alright?” The Mandalorian asks, watching as Oralia lays you on the examination table. The lights are too bright in this room, it’s almost a startling reminder of that nightmare you had days ago. Strapped down to a table and subjected to torture, you never wanted to experience that again. Not again, not again, not again…

“She is having a panic attack,” Oralia replies in a calm manner, placing a wet cloth against your burning forehead. Their voices sound distant, muted even as you try and get over this attack. It’s so much worse than the ones before, your limbs feel numb and weightless all at the same time and the sterile smell of the room fills your senses. It only makes the panic worse.

A whisper of “I’m sorry” and the white ceiling blurs above you, your eyelids become too heavy to keep open. Sleep consumes you.

When you wake up, the room is the same. White walls and white ceilings stare back at you as you try to take in your new environment. The softness of a bed fills the fists of your hands. They must’ve moved you while you were still sleeping. Sitting up, careful of the needle in your arm, you look around in confusion. Where was Mando? What happened? How long were you asleep for?

“It is good to see that you are awake,” a voice greets you. Oralia. The nurse from earlier.

“Where is the Mandalorian?” You ask, not sure whether or not you can trust her.

“He is out. I told him to walk off his anger.” The nurse replies. She walks over to your bedside and examines the IV needle in the crook of your elbow. The skin is bruised but you’re not sure if it’s her work or from the Devaronians from earlier.

“Does he know I’m awake?”

“He will return, I am sure. You needed fluids in your system as well as a proper examination, but only one of those things I could do while you were asleep.” Oralia replies, examining the needle in the crook of your elbow. Adjusting the bandages, she looks at you with a kind smile.

“Did I pass out?” The last moments before falling asleep aren’t clear, only a blur of pictures and muted dialogue.

“You did not. I sedated you. Your panic consumed you and even my years of training could not walk you down from that.” she murmurs, removing the needle from your vein with calm precision. A small bead of blood pools out and she wipes it away, before wrapping the tiny wound.

Bringing your hand to your face, you feel along where your eye had been bruised. Clearly, it had been treated in your sleep as the skin is no longer tender to your touch. The patch just before your hairline is also gone, the skin smooth with no evidence of a scar.

“I am surprised you made it as far as you did. The Mandalorian told me a great deal of what happened to you both this morning. A pair of Devaronians?”

“Yes,” you say in response. She doesn’t urge you for any more of the story, but you tell her anyways. “The Mandalorian held his own. I, well, I didn’t.” Oralia chuckles at your statement.

“You are brave.” She compliments and you feel your skin growing hot at the statement. “It takes a lot for a woman like you to travel the galaxy. Much less with a Mandalorian.”

“I’m searching for answers. I was a victim of the Imperials and they took my son from me. The Mandalorian is helping me find him.” You tell her and she hums, finishing her work on the bandage just in the crook of your elbow.

“You have other wounds,” Oralia says, this time her hand placing itself right above your heart. You look down at where her hand is and you nod, looking away from her in shame. “I will grab Dr. Orn.”

The door opens with a soft whoosh sound and Oralia departs. You’re left in silence, pondering over your thoughts again. You didn’t want to have another panic attack. Taking a deep breath, you think about where the Mandalorian may be. Oralia had told him to walk off his anger. Why had he been so angry? Was it because you were asleep for so long? Thinking on it, it was some of the best sleep you had in a long time. No nightmares, no memories weaving themselves into dreams.

A click and the door opens again, this time Oralia is followed by a human woman. Dr. Orn, you deduce. Dr. Orn quietly walks over to your bedside and examines what you think is your chart on a datapad. The information displayed is not in basic and you frown.

“Hello,” Dr. Orn greets you. She’s older, possibly a few years shy of Valara’s grandmother but her eyes hold the same kindness. Dr. Orn says your name and you blink, looking back up at her. “We did some bloodwork. First, I would like to welcome you to Orus and we’re grateful that you chose our medcenter as the place to handle your healthcare needs. Second, your bloodwork came back great.”

A sigh of relief. “That’s great,” you murmur and Dr. Orn smiles.

“Oralia did some investigating on your chain code and there’s no record of you in any system, not even ex-Imperial. I’m sure you were aware, as was the Mandalorian. He was kind enough to give us what little information you had on yourself. But given the current state of your health, you are in great shape. Minimal scarring from the leaves of Puvo, which is great. I’m sure you’re aware of the ongoing mental healing you’re going through, but with time, you can work through the nightmares and panic attacks. However, there is something I want to note.”

Dr. Orn displays the datapad to you, this time the information is in basic. A rundown of what medical records they could establish for you. One healthy pregnancy was just one of the few things that caught your eye.

“It’s great to see that you’ve been able to have a healthy pregnancy. Oralia tells me you had a son, about fifteen years ago, correct?” Dr. Orn asks you, pointing at the profile they had made of your son. It was blank except for his name and estimated age. You were listed as his mother, but the name underneath FATHER remained blank.

“Yes. Castin. He was about ten when he was taken from me,” you reply, hand reaching out to skim through the notes they had established for you. Most of the information was blank, mostly because it was unknown, even to you.

“Good, good, as you can already tell we’ve logged that in the file we created for you.” Dr. Orn smiles before she brings the datapad closer to herself and removing it from your view. “However, we detected some anomalies in your blood. A woman of your age should be producing the normal hormones that regulate a menstrual cycle. We found that there was a lack of most of those hormones. Can you tell me when your last cycle was?”

You open your mouth to give a quick answer but quickly realize you don’t know. When you had arrived on Puvo, Valara had explained it was a possibility that your cycle would be irregular, considering everything your body had been through. But now that you were thinking about it, you hadn’t even noticed a lack in your cycle. You had been distracted by the ongoing therapy and work on Puvo.

“I-I don’t know…possibly after I gave birth to Castin but I don’t really remember,” you chewed at your bottom lip. What could it mean for you?

“That’s what I was afraid of,” Dr. Orn sighs, looking back down at the datapad. Her fingers tap on the screen, possibly logging what you had said. “You see, when we did your blood test, we found the lack of hormones a sign that you were not having a regular cycle. It’s not unusual, travel can bring stress on the body and I’ve been informed of what happened in your past, but for you, it means something else. When the Empire had you in their custody, what exactly do you remember them doing to you?”

You can feel Oralia’s comforting hand on your lower back, rubbing circles to soothe your nerves. You weren’t sure if you actually felt soothed, but you took a deep breath.

“It’s mostly a blur, I remember the electrocution and how painful it was, but beyond that, I don’t know.” You inform her, your hands twisting together in your lap. Why was she dragging this out? How bad could it possibly be?

“I see,” Dr. Orn hums. You watch as her hand reaches out, resting on your knee. A gentle touch. “When the Empire had you in their custody, most likely while you were in between torture sessions, they performed a surgery to sterilize you. The lack of hormones in your blood and lack of cycle leads us to believe that this is true. I am terribly sorry that you had to suffer under their hand. If there is anything I can do to help, please let me know.” Her face says it all, the sincereness in her tone and the sympathy in her eyes. The realization of the diagnosis hits you, knocking the air out of your lungs.

Even with Oralia’s hand on your back, you weep.

Read Chapter Eight - Finally, A Lead here!

[followthebluebell]

FIP: Feline Infectious Peritonitis

Sprinkles contemplates some birds.  We’re re-doing the catios right now, so they’re all closed off.  I think she’s looking forward to being outdoors again.

I’m putting a cut here because this is a LENGTHY READ and, in case of further developments, I’d like to be able to easily update this article. 

In October 2019, she was diagnosed with ocular FIP (Feline infectious peritonitis), which is a mutation of feline coronavirus (FCoV, which is very distinct from SARS-CoV-2, the virus that causes COVID-19).   FCoV is ubiquitous in the cat population: almost every cat has it or is exposed to various strains of it.  Most cats get over it just fine with only mild diarrhea.  In a small percentage of cats (we’re uncertain on the percentage, which I’ll get into later, but it’s theoretically somewhere between 5-10%), it goes fuckwhack apeshit and mutates into FIP.

We don’t know why it spontaneously mutates.  There seems to be a genetic component to it.  It’s believed to be more common in purebred cats, but we’re really not sure--- since FIP is a diagnosis by exclusion, there often is a hefty vet bill attached to the diagnosis and a person who can afford to buy a purebred cat from a cattery is more likely to be able to afford that bill.  It MAY be triggered by stress.  It’s much more common in younger cats, often appearing in kittens ranging from 4 months to 4 years.  This doesn’t mean older cats are safe; I know of at least one case in a 12 year old cat.

Sprinkles was diagnosed at 3 and a half months.  She didn’t have a particularly stressful event before developing symptoms.  She’s not a purebred.  I don’t know anything about her genetic history, so I can’t cross that off the list.

Mickey, my second FIP kitten, was diagnosed at 4 months.  I know slightly more about his health records but it’s still scant.  He arrived with an unusual skin ailment: sarcoptic mange.  Hypothetically, this could indicate an already delicate immune system that left him vulnerable to this sort of FCoV mutation.

FIP is deadly and remains, to this day, the most horrifying disease I’ve ever personally encountered.  Thankfully, FIP itself is NOT contagious.  FCoV is highly contagious but, as previously mentioned, it’s fairly common in the cat population.  There was a study done to see if separating kittens from their mother at 7 weeks (approximately the period when a mother’s antibodies begin to wear off and the kittens have to begin producing their own) would prevent cats from catching FCoV from her.  This was effective but the social drawbacks are too heavy a cost for it to be considered regularly.

There is a vaccine for FCoV but it’s largely ineffective and most vets don’t recommend it.

FIP comes in two primary forms: wet (effusive) and dry (non-effusive).  Usually, FCoV exists only in the gastrointestinal system.  It’s really the only place it can replicate itself with ease.  Once the virus mutates, it can’t replicate itself as well, but it CAN infect macrophages.  Macrophages are highly mobile white blood cells.  They go pretty much everywhere, and ones infected with FIPV (Feline Infectious Peritonitis Virus) will carry the virus along for the ride. 

The early symptoms are vague.  These cats are lethargic, listless, have low or no appetite, weight loss, and a fluctuating fever.  The first symptom I caught in Sprinkles was complete avoidance: she was actively avoiding other kittens and other kittens were avoiding her.   Mickey’s only symptoms were lethargy and diarrhea.  I only got suspicious about possible FIP because the other kittens in his playgroup didn’t have any diarrhea at all. 

And this is where we see a split in the forms of FIP.

Effusive FIP is characterized by the accumulation of fluid within the abdomen and is more common.  It happens very quickly.  Cats with effusive FIP develop breathing problems rapidly.  The fluid drawn from the abdomen is usually straw-yellow.  Effusive FIP is said to be more common, although only one of the 5 cases I’ve seen in the last few years was wet FIP. 

Thankfully, effusive FIP has a few distinct traits that makes it easier to diagnose.  It’s important to remember that FIP itself is generally a diagnosis by exclusion. 

Measuring the protein in the effusion is a good first step.  If it’s less than 35g/l, FIP is generally ruled out.

The albumin to globulin ratio is considered next, via a blood test. If it’s less than 0.4, FIP should be considered.

Finally, examining the cells in the effusion is valuable.  If they’re primarily lymphocytes, FIP is excluded.

Non-effusive FIP is more difficult to spot, because the symptoms are so varied.  Granulomas (inflammatory cells) form in various organs, which produces an extreme variety of symptoms.  The most commonly affected symptoms are the ocular and neurological symptoms.

Ocular FIP happens when the virus crosses the blood-ocular barrier and is characterized by slightly opaque white films on one or both eyes; these don’t cover the entire eye.  They’re often just a small section.  This was the first distinct symptom I saw in Sprinkles. It’s considered a distinct enough sign that her ophthalmologist was able to tell me that she was 99% certain it was FIP.

Neurological FIP is my own personal hell.  The virus crossed the blood-brain barrier and infects the brain.  The first symptom is usually a limp or a slight tremble in the head.  The paralysis often begins in the hind limbs and it travels upwards.  The cat eventually loses all mobility.  If the cat is lucky, they’ll begin to have seizures instead and die soon afterwards.  Like I said, it remains the single-most awful thing I’ve ever seen. 

Non-effusive FIP is harder to diagnose than effusive FIP, especially if the cat fails to develop ocular or neurological symptoms.  In these cases, the only symptoms the cat has are fevers, diarrhea, and other non-specific issues.

Once again, the best bet is to consider the albumin to globulin ratio.  The same rule of ‘if it’s under 0.4, FIP should be considered’ holds true.

Unfortunately, checking for antibodies is fairly useless.  A positive FCoV test just means the cat has been exposed to FCoV.

FIP is deadly.  While there are some isolated cases of cats seemingly recovering from it, I think it’s more likely that those were simply misdiagnosed cases.  As I’ve said before, FIP is a diagnosis by exclusion, so a misdiagnosis can happen fairly easily.  A cat with wet FIP is gone in days.  A cat who’s unlucky enough to develop neurological FIP may linger for weeks until they die of starvation, oxygen deprivation as the lungs themselves are paralyzed, or dehydration.  Ocular FIP generally spreads into the brain, causing seizures. 

Sprinkles is very, VERY lucky.  I had been following the study very closely and I had an acquaintance who recently started treating her foster cat for FIP.  I was able to get into contact with some folks and obtain experimental treatment for my kittens.

GS-441525

In February 2019, there was a very promising study on a specific drug called GS-441524.  Most of the cats involved with the study made a full recovery.  The company (Gilead-Sciences) behind the drug wasn’t interested in getting it FDA approved for cats out of concern that it would affect its approval for human use.  See, if it’s used officially for cats, Gilead-Sciences would be obligated to report any negative side-effects and that could impact getting it approved for human use down the line.  “One of the rules in drug development is ‘never perform a test you don’t have to, if the results could be problematic,” isn’t an uncommon saying.  It’s one of the reasons why I fell out of research and development myself.

I had some pull and was able to get experimental access to this drug for Sprinkles and, later, Mickey. 

Both kittens went through three months of daily injections and a further 3 months of observations before they were deemed FIP-free.  After seeing 3 other cats die from it, it’s been a blessing to see them recover.  They’re both especially lucky that they finished their treatment cycle JUST before COVID-19 hit American shores since I couldn’t, in good conscience, continue using a very promising antiviral in cats when it would likely be needed by humans.

It’s definitely not a perfect system.  Three months of daily injections (or pills) is not ideal for the average owner for several reasons.  In addition to the difficulty of injecting a cat with an EXTREMELY painful drug daily, it also requires a lot of math; the dosage has to be adjusted daily to take weight gain into consideration.  Even the concentration has to be adjusted at times.   I haven’t used the pills at all, but I know a lot of people have had problems with cats biting through the pills.  In addition, the pills seem less effective against neurological or ocular FIP.

Gilead-Sciences has refined GS-441524 into GS-5734 (named Remdesivir), which is supposed to be more efficient.  Hypothetically, the addition of the phosphate groups should make it easier for it to get across barriers and be absorbed more easily.  Hopefully this will result in a shorter treatment time, although I suspect it will be more expensive than GS-441524.  This is already a substantial cost attached to GS-441524, with the treatment of a single cat or kitten over 1,000 USD.

As of writing (April 20, 2020), neither Remdesivir nor GS-441524 are available to the average public legally.  Remdesivir has been approved for use in humans with COVID-19 in emergency cases.  

[the-last-cuddlebender]

Kataang Pilot!AU

(This prompt was really fun. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it, Anon!)

Words: 1,659

*********************************

Katara met him when they were in flight school. Well, ‘met’ might be too strong a word.

She was walking down the hall and contemplating fluid dynamics when she passed him—the boy with tattoos a shade of blue that put the sky to shame and with a smile so bright that she had to squint to behold it. His laugh was a vapor trail that made her giddy like nothing else had done before. He gesticulated so animatedly that he nearly cut off the heads of a dozen passers-by.

Katara tried, once, to talk to him. It was the only test in flight school that she failed. She was too quiet; the world was too loud. It didn’t exactly help that some boy named Haru had pulled the tattooed boy into a headlock that devolved into a wrestling match just as she got his attention.

He tried, twice, to talk to her. He was more than successful both times.

The first time, he spotted her from across the courtyard and damn near teleported to her.

His name was Aang. He wasn’t that tall.

He was the kindest soul she’d ever met.

When he left the school, he took most of her with him, and Katara had been searching for what he stole ever since.

...

Not too long after he left her puzzled, empty, and longing, Katara had to leave, as well. But it wasn’t for an advanced program like he flew off to.

Gran-Gran had a heart attack. It wasn’t pretty. Katara was the glue and the salve cooing her brother and her father to cope and recover. They helped her just as much, and she vowed to visit them more.

(Gran-Gran told her that she saw death, called him a bitch, and reminded him to tell her daughter-in-law that Kya had to wait another ten years for her company.)

...

Katara was only a little behind and only had to retake a few classes when she returned to flight school a year and a half later, but it wasn’t the end of the world.

Graduating was easy, but choosing an employer? That was hard. Katara was an ace—the top of her class. They even put her photo in the hall of notable students.

...She was reminded of Aang and what he stole from her every time she saw his portrait pinned next to hers.

...

It was a requirement to serve as a co-pilot for the first few years after schooling. It was like a continued education after medical school when an MD truly learned what it meant to be a practitioner, but turning from co-captain to captain felt like it was taking twice as long.

Sometimes, it took students twelve years to become a captain. Sometimes, it took them two years.

It took Aang eight months.

Katara was entering her ninth month when she was transferred to his airline.

He spotted her from across the terminal like he had been waiting and looking for her. He vanished and reappeared at her side, and if only he had a puff of smoke, she would have thought him a magician.

He shook her hand and talked at Mach speed. His smile alone nearly blew her away, but his hand holding hers kept her on her feet.

“—it was you! They all said you dropped out, but I knew you wouldn’t! And then I saw your plaque when I visited on a favor-call from Roku, and I couldn’t believe—!”

He paused. Katara’s world stood still. Her world also looked kindof splotchy and dotted with black.

That was weird…

Oh wait.

Breathing.

Breathing was a thing she had to do.

Unfortunately, Katara was too late in her revelation. Her heart broke when his eyes softened like that and his concern boiled over into panic. She was thinking about how nice it sounded when he said her name even as she fell back and fainted.

He caught her, of course.

Luckily, Mai and Lu Ten were willing to exchange their schedules to save either Katara or Aang from being fired.

(He had refused to leave her. It was incredibly foolish. Top in the industry or not, their superiors would only take so much from even him.)

It wasn’t exactly a first date, but he bought her food from the cafeteria and bought her one of those super-fuzzy travel blankets to keep her warm. They talked over pizza that was so greasy that they had to dab it with napkins, and they laughed over coffee that was far too bitter to be called ‘edible’.

They shared secrets over hot cocoa and talked like they knew each other forever.

Aang thought he was being sly when he loaded his straw with a paper wad and blew it at her.

He smiled like a kid on Christmas.

Katara felt like she was one, too.

The g-forces she experienced when he smiled—at her—made her so lightheaded that she whispered a thankful prayer to whoever was pulling her life’s strings that she was seated when she first witnessed the miracle so close and in its entirety.

They fell asleep back-to-back (though it was more like side-to-side) in the terminal—just another ‘couple’ bending under the stress of a connecting flight.

...

“You seem eager to be out of here.” Katara settled into her co-pilot’s chair as her captain fussed over the little details that Katara’s classmates had made fun of her for caring about.

“Ba Sing Se has never been...Well, let’s just say that it’s not like how I was raised.”

“But the South is?”

“Of course! Middle of nowhere, lots of high places, room to run and frolic as I please—”

Katara couldn’t hide her laugh. “Frolic?”

“Have you never frolicked?”

“When I was a girl, maybe.”

“You should try it sometime. It’s not like it gets any less fun with age.”

“Is that an invitation?”

“...Maybe.” Aang scratched his face, didn’t meet her eyes, and flushed a color even brighter than the emergency exit sign. “Or it could...be a date?”

“To go frolicking?”

“Of course.”

It was quiet until it wasn’t. A giggle slipped past Katara’s defenses. She hugged her middle and laughed so hard that she cried, and she nearly laughed herself into a coma when Aang bent over, too. His laugh sounded like how good memories felt, and Katara never wanted to hear more of something in her entire life.

She couldn’t feel her seat beneath her—just the feeling of her hand on his arm and the soft bumping of his head against hers.

Katara was falling, and she was falling hard.

But, for some reason, she wasn’t scared of hitting the ground.

If she didn’t know any better, she might have thought that she was flying.

...

Sokka, having heard the hint of interest in Katara’s voice when she recounted her tale with her dreamy tattooed captain, made immediate plans and cashed-in on more than a few favors to get himself onto her new schedule. He didn't trust Aang, not at first. No one could be that happy.

“—and gentlemen, in the event that you have not been in an automobile since 1942, we’re gonna show you how to fasten a seatbelt, so watch closely—”

Sokka, while a phenomenal flight attendant, was walking a razor’s edge onto Katara’s last nerve.

But Aang and her brother got along famously.

Katara should have expected nothing less.

This was Aang she was talking about.

Her boyfriend could befriend the devil himself.

The thought made Katara’s world get fuzzy and black-splotchy again. Luckily, Aang was laughing too hard with Sokka to notice her holding tight to the wall.

Breathing.

Breathing was a thing she had to do.

Aang’s vapor-trail-laugh gave her the cardinal directions and guided her towards which way was up. His arm curled around her waist like the seatbelts that had kept them anchored when they hit turbulence two months ago and dropped 400 feet.

Katara didn’t notice when next she blushed so hard that her vision went black-splotchy again.

But Aang, without pausing his conversation, was already tugging her closer so she all but pressed right against his heart.

His laugh died out. His chest slowly expanded.

Breathing.

Katara smiled.

Breathing was a thing she still had to do.

...

When Katara finally got her wings, Aang couldn’t have been more proud.

Sokka puffed his chest. “This is Katara, my flying sister.”

“Sokka, please…”

“Yeah, Sokka.” Aang was a grinning shadow touching her shoulder and a reminder to smile brushing her side. “Katara isn’t your ‘flying sister’.”

“Thank you, Aang—”

Aang hugged her from behind and held her so tightly that he curled over and started to eclipse her. “Katara is my flying girlfriend~”

Aang rubbed his cheek to hers. Katara grumbled and fought fate to keep angry as long as she could. “You both are insufferable.” She kissed Aang’s cheek like she was swatting a mosquito, but it only made him giggle and hold her tighter.

Sokka pretended to gag and uttered ‘Oogies’ like a mantra.

Katara blushed, lost her slippery grip on the smile fighting to make itself seen, and looked at her father just as the shutter on Hakoda’s camera went off.

...Aang carried the photo on his person like it was a medical device so vital that he would die if he was ever without it.

“Do you have to keep it there?” Katara pulled one switch and then two, and she side-eyed her smirking First Officer.

Aang ignored her and adjusted the photo pinned to the gauges in front of him. His smile got a little bigger, his eyes a little softer. He looked down at the clouds below them and then up at the heavens beyond. “...The stars sure are beautiful, tonight.”

His hand found hers—they were at an altitude that required little more than autopilot, but it was still breaking regulation.

Katara gently squeezed his fingers. “Yeah. They are.”

...

All of their nights melted into a routine that felt like the same night played over and over.

Katara wouldn’t have had it any other way.

She didn’t mind when Aang put up a fuss just because he could and because he liked to get her flustered. She didn’t even mind when he cocooned himself in the blankets and pouted in a silent demand for five more minutes.

He was only playing. He could be plenty serious if he wanted.

Like the time he crabbed the plane onto an icy runway in an emergency landing. Or like the time he dove into the belly of the plane to give CPR to an elderly passenger.

His seriousness could only go so far, though. He truly was a child at heart. There was nothing wrong with that, of course. Something forever young could never grow brittle and die.

Like the way he blushed every time she reached for his hand. Or like the little hitch to his voice that took over his words whenever she hugged him.

He could hardly speak when he asked her to marry him.

Katara wasn’t that much better off, but neither of them had needed words for the longest time. They sat side-by-side in the nose of the plane and ‘spoke’ in the silence for hours on end.

Kisses were quiet, anyways.

Well, not entirely.

Aang laughed, absolutely giddy, every time, no matter how much or how often they did.

Katara’s laugh drifted in his vapor trail as a gentle hum that made his smile impossibly bigger.

Then, and only then, did it feel like she had finally gotten back what he had stolen—all those years ago—from her.

...

His voice was a song, and his love bled into every worded lyric. They were the warm purrs of an engine that would never fail, and they made Katara’s stomach fall and bounce heaven-ward like her wheels had just left the ground.

When she danced with him, every step felt like lift-off. Every turn gave her g-forces that had her sinking into him to keep from being blown away.

The wedding was over, their guests were gone, but every star and galaxy crowded the sky to witness their love for each other.

This was her captain and co-pilot—her husband and best friend for life.

His name was Aang. He was very tall and quite proud of it, though he made himself eye-level with every person he met.

He was a simple monk and a dirty thief.

But Katara finally had back what was hers.

What was hers was named Aang.

He was the kindest soul she’d ever met.

He kept her grounded even though her feet never touched the earth when she was with him.

He was the part of her that she loved most.

His kisses were g-forces.

His ‘I love you’s were free-falling.

His hugs were the wings that handed her the sky.

His smiles were the spirit that held her aloft.

His name was Aang.

He was hers.

He was the kindest soul she’d ever met.

And Katara would remind him of how much she loved him even long after they were both tied to the earth.

*********************************

.

.

If you spotted that reference to Tao philosophy, I give you a cookie🍪☺️

[pinballwitxh]

heavenly - request - spencer reid x oc

summary: a local sketch artist comes back in for a case the team is working on and discovers she’s slowly taken a liking to the resident genius.

warnings: so much smut, some cursing

a/n: I was so excited to write this one that I took it on right away. sorry that I went out of order but I had to get this one out!  the inspiration to write this came and went so I am sorry if some things seems repetitive and others seem...actually good lol.  enjoy!!!!

Spencer sat behind her as she introduced herself to the young victim across from them. The girl was wrapped snuggly in a blanket and fidgeting constantly.

“I’ve already told everything I know to the cops, can I please just go home?” She began to sob, “Don’t make me retell it all!”

“I’m not going to ask you anymore questions,” the artist said calmly as she leaned forward, “You just need to describe his face, anything you’re able to remember.”

“Just take some deep breaths and close your eyes,” Spencer said as he leaned over the artist’s shoulder, “It may help you to remember as many details as possible.”

The girl leaned back in her chair and wiped her eyes before nodding to them. Spencer sat back and watched the artist and her hands work, absolutely mesmerized by how fluid her hands moved and how perfect the lines were.

She didn’t even really know what this man’s face looked like and yet it was coming together beautifully.

For a little over an hour they worked with her before happily dismissing her to rejoin her worried family in the lobby. The two stood side by side with smiles as she ran into their arms, sobbing happily.

She handed him the drawing, “Team might need that soon,”

“We really appreciate all your help,” he said as he took the paper and shook her hand.

“Never thought my interest in art would take me to the FBI someday,” she said as she gathered her things.

Spencer shoved his hands into his pockets and smiled, “You have a really great gift, it’s fascinating to watch you work, actually.”

She blushed and hugged her sketchbook close to her, “Thank you, Doctor Reid-”

“You know you can call me Spencer, I think we’ve worked together enough to be on a first-name basis.” he said with a grin.

In a surge of confidence she scribbled her number down on a piece of sketchbook paper and nearly shoved it into his chest from all the nerves.  She knew she had been crushing on the genius for awhile now.

“In that case I guess we can be on texting-basis, too,” she chuckled.

Spencer held the piece of paper close, “Would it be too forward to ask you on a date before texting you?”

The look of surprise that washed over her face made Spencer think he had done something wrong, he had definitely been too forward.  He profusely apologized to her while stammering over his words.

She laid a hand on his arm, “I’d love to go on a date, I didn’t mean to make you worry,” she sighed, “It’s just been a very long time since I’ve gone on a date with anyone.  I was kind of shocked you asked me,”

Spencer rubbed the back of his neck, “Oh, well you don’t have to if you aren’t ready-”

“Text me tonight so we can figure out a time, Spencer.” she winked before waving at him and turning to leave.  He watched her all the way down the hallway before turning around and cheering to himself quietly.

- 6 MONTHS LATER -

She looked around the buzzing bar for Spencer, meeting his smile from across the restaurant.  He stood from his chair and opened his arms, pulling her into a tight and close hug after she ran to him.  

It had been a two-week long case, lots of lives were lost and to say it was frustrating was an understatement.  The dark circles clouded his eyelids and his skin was so pale she questioned how long it had been since he had seen daylight.

The rest of the team laughed and they sat down, jumping back into the conversation.  His hand travelled up her thigh slowly, causing her breath to hitch in her throat.  Spencer wasn’t one for PDA, usually, but if it was happening it usually meant he was upset.  Her hand found his and her fingers coiled over his easily, holding his hand tightly and squeezing it once in awhile.

She turned to look at him in the middle of conversation, it was clear that some of the stress was already gone but it still lingered behind his tired laugh and half-hearted smiles.  He caught her stare and smiled widely at her, leaning in to kiss her cheek.

“I think we should all go home and get some rest,” Hotch said, a command laced behind his words.  

Before the couple left Derek approached her and brought her in for a hug, “How’s everything going with you, Der?”

He smiled, “You always know how to cheer me up with that smile, sweetness,” he leaned down to place a kiss on her forehead, “I am a little worried about your man, though.”

She frowned, “What happened?”

“It shook us all, kid, not gonna lie,” he sighed, “It shook us up in different ways but Spencer was especially upset that he was away from you.”

“I mean, neither of us like it when he has to leave,”

“Just talk to him tonight, I don’t think he’s gonna sleep very well.”

She nodded and squeezed her friend in a side hug, “Thanks for looking out for him, Morgan.”

He smiled, “Always have to keep an eye on Doctor Strange.”

“I liked that reference,” Spencer said as he approached them, holding his hand out for her to take.

The drive home was very quiet, which was unusual for Spencer after coming home from a case.  His hand held hers steady over the console and he didn’t let go until they pulled into the parking garage of her apartment.  He frowned and looked over at her, “Why didn’t you drop me off at my place?”

“You already have your things packed up, so I figured you can stay the night,” she smiled as she leaned over to kiss his cheek.

He didn’t object, Spencer just liked to know plans ahead of time and yet he found himself content with being here.  The elevator ride up to her apartment was also very quiet and it was starting to worry her.  Spencer was usually pretty well-recovered after coming home from a case.  

Clearly he wasn’t.

- - -

While Spencer took a very long bath and shower she got a fire going and laid out some fluffy blankets on the couch.  She had a few new movies that she had found on Netflix listed in her phone that she thought they should try out.  From the shadows her cat emerged, mewing at her and rubbing against her leg as she rifled through the fridge for food.

In a scurry her cat bounded towards the bathroom door, pawing at the wood in an attempt to find out who was on the other side.  She rolled her eyes and followed the animal, picking him up and scratching behind his ears, “You can’t get attention anytime you want, you know?”

Spencer opened the door and gasped when he saw her on the other side.  She blinked, keeping her eyes level with his so he wouldn’t feel uncomfortable.  Spencer hadn’t been super intimate with her, ever, and she was okay with that.  They had been slowly testing the waters, edging closer to the edge each time they were together.  

Seeing him shirtless was a rare sight and she wanted to let her eyes roam over his entire body so bad.

“I-I left my clothes in your room,” he stuttered.

She laughed nervously and stepped out of the way to let him pass.  Before he shut the door behind him she looked over her shoulder, taking a glimpse at his bare back and the water that dripped down his shoulder blades.

The door shut and she jumped at the sound, instantly brought back to reality.  Her cat squirmed against her hold so she set him down, once again he began to paw at the door Spencer had just disappeared behind.

She decided to leave him be and get as far away from his naked body as she could.

He came walking down the hall with her cat in his arms, cuddling him close.  She smiled at the sight and laughed, her cat was such a suck-up when it came to Spencer.

The couch dipped as he sat next to her, cradling her cat like a baby and scratching the underside of his chin.  She pulled her blanket up closer and offered him a glass of wine, to which he surprisingly accepted.  

“Must’ve been a hard one,” she said as she passed his glass over to him.

He nodded, “You have no idea,”

She looked away, “I’m sure I don’t, I’m sorry, Spence.”

He smiled as he set her cat down between them, “Let’s just watch a movie, something funny.”

Ten minutes later both of them were curled up warmly under separate blankets, sipping on wine and engrossed in the film.  About halfway through was when she could feel his legs pressing up against her feet and she slowly slid her legs over his own.  Without even looking at each other they settled into the new position and continued to watch.

His hand found a resting spot on her inner thighs and immediately she could feel the heat flush her face.  She shifted her legs and left him more room to slide his hand down lower, and he did.

Not even ten minutes later she decided she couldn’t take it anymore and apparently Spencer couldn’t either.

They practically lunged at each other after making eye contact.  His placed both of his hands on her hips while hers latched onto the sides of his face.  There wasn’t much time left for breathing as they kissed deeply and hungrily, tugging at each other’s lips and tongues sliding around one another.  

She slid lower onto the couch with a vice-like grip on his collar.  His body loomed over hers and he subtly nudged her legs apart, making room for him to lay between them.  He hastily tossed the blanket to the side and groaned at the fact that the only thing separating them now was a very thin layer of clothes.

“Spence,” she moaned quietly between kisses, his hard-on becoming very apparent now.  He ground his hips down onto hers, something he had recently learned that she liked.  She shuddered at the contact as a chill spread throughout her whole body.

He let out a small groan, “I need you,” he whispered.

For a moment she didn’t think she heard him correctly, so she continued to kiss his lips feverishly.  He barely had time to catch a breath between the needy kisses, so he pulled away and captured her face in his hands.  

She opened her eyes and stared up at him, chest heaving.

“I want you, so bad,” he whispered as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

She blinked, “W-want me as in. . .”

He cleared his throat and nodded, “In every single way possible,”

His eyes flickered across her face and he smiled down at her.  She noticed it was a small smile, but genuine nonetheless.  She propped herself up on her elbows and kissed him deeply, taking his larger hand in hers.  Slowly she guided his hand to her breast before he took over, massaging it slowly.  His breath caught in his throat as she ran a hand up his chest, fingers dipping beneath the seam of the Cal Tech shirt he wore.  

He dove his head low to her neck, nearly suffocating himself in the warmth of her skin.  He peppered kisses all over her throat and with his tongue he could taste the faintest bit of sweat beginning to form on her.  She let out a guttural growl, something Spencer had never heard from her before.

His erection twitched and he ground against her slow and hard.  With her arms wrapped around his neck she sighed into his shoulder, kissing the exposed skin on his neck as he nudged her bra off slowly.  Soon both of their shirts were off and Spencer had yet to open his eyes.  

She sat up and straddled his lap, tilting his head up to meet her stare.  He slowly opened his eyes, brows knitted together in a deep frown.

She placed a strand of hair behind his ear, “Are you sure you want to?”

He nodded vigorously, “I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life,” he said quietly, tracing his knuckle over her cheek.

“Then what’s got you hesitating?”

He looked away and pulled her close, not saying a word.  For a moment she waited, not sure what to expect from her boyfriend.  Spencer was a very quiet person when it came to his feelings.  Despite the fact they had been dating for nearly 6 months, she found that did nothing when it came to talking about their feelings.

“You have to talk to me if you want to do this,” she whispered as she took his face into her hands and forcing him to look at her.

There were tears in his eyes and she frowned, immediately pulling him into her hold and hugging him close.  Quietly he cried into her neck, shoulders heaving with the faintest hiccups.  She shushed him, sitting up against the couch and cradling him.  

Nothing like this ever happened and it startled her a little bit.

“Stop hiding things from me, Spencer,” she kissed the top of his head.

He pulled away and wiped at his dark eyes, “I’ve never been more of anything else in my life,” he paused to take a deep breath, “Those two weeks that I was gone was one of the most eye-opening experiences ever.”

She nodded and kissed his cheek, “I’m so sorry,”

“There was a couple, they were engaged,” he smiled, “And I could see us being them.  B-but,” he paused, “She was murdered and there was nothing we could have done to stop it.  Her fiancé, he was so broken. . .”

“But I’m here, right now, I’m not going anywhere.”

“I know you are, but it made me reevaluate us and what we are,”

She sat back with wide eyes, “Don’t tell me you’re-”

“Absolutely not, I couldn’t imagine life without you,” he kissed her deeply, “It made me realize how badly I don’t want to lose you.”

She placed a hand on his cheek with tears in her eyes, beginning to understand what he was saying.

“I’m so ready to share me with you, all of me, and I don’t want to waste anymore time because our time here is so precious,” he smiled, “It made me realize how much I love you, seeing all of that.”

She pressed her lips to his held him so close that there was no space left between them.  The kissing grew heated and more passionate and sweat began to pool at her forehead.  She pulled away with a smile and tugged him as she stood up.

Spencer held her hand tight as they walked to the bedroom, shutting the door behind them.  Spencer pulled her to him with hands on her waist, staring down at her with tear streaks across his cheeks.  She smiled up at him and kissed his nose, eliciting a small chuckle from him.

“We don’t have to do this, I don’t want you to feel like you have to just because you’re upset or because of anything I’ve ever said to you-”

“I want to.”

The confidence in his voice and the look in his eyes was something familiar to her, she had felt it in her own body before awhile ago.  He leaned down slowly and captured her lips in his own strong ones, a smile crossing his face.  She wrapped her arms around him and he lifted her up, to her surprise, and carried her to the bed.

The city lights streamed in from the window, she had a perfect view with large windows to accompany it.

He laid her down gently and allowed her to run her hands over his chest, studying him.  Adoringly he gazed at her while she took him in with her eyes.  She had an artist’s mind, he remembered, she liked to study people and every piece of them.  

She was trying to drink in every bit of him that her mind could allow, she was finally getting to know him physically and she wanted to remember every little detail.  Every little freckle, scar, birthmark and indent on his body.

“You’re gorgeous,” she whispered with a laugh.

He blushed, “Thank you,”

She met his eyes before letting her hands trail lower, running over the bulge in his pants.  He let his eyes slide shut and groaned at the feeling of her palming him.  It felt heavenly, this was a feeling he never knew existed.  It was so perfect.

She yanked his belt off and slowly unzipped him, allowing him time to adjust to the feelings.  He nodded his head when she began to tug down on his pants, asking with the look in her eyes if it was okay.

Once his pants were off, he too began to run his hands over her hips and the jeans that clothed her.  She smiled at him and tugged down on her pants, allowing him to help her slide them off, leaving them in only their under garments.

His lips parted in awe, he had never seen her like this.  Her hair spilled all around her and the lights from the outside made her look so ethereal.  She was everything he wanted, and he wanted her now.

Slowly he lowered himself to her chest, placing his hands on each of her breasts and squeezing lightly.  She ran a hand through his long curls and smiled as he ran his thumbs over her hardened nipples.  A gasp escaped her mouth as he finally dipped down to suck on her.

Her body was on fire.

He could feel just how wet for him she was and he never imagined a feeling quite like it.  He groaned as he switched to her other breast, taking her in his mouth once again.  His tongue swirled around the throbbing bud and the joy it brought to him to hear her moan his name only made him want her even more.

If that was possible.

He pulled away and immediately she was straddling him, grinding her hips against his own.  She pushed him back on the bed and he settled into her duvet, closing his eyes and focusing on the feeling of her mouth on his stomach.

He gasped when her fingers curled around the seam of his underwear, tickling him the slightest bit.

“Is this okay?” she asked quietly.

He opened his eyes and peered over at her, “Keep going,” 

She smiled and continued to pull his underwear off, slowly sliding it down his legs.  Her focus was solely on him as she leaned down to take his length into her mouth.

He shuddered violently and he gripped the sheets tightly.

“Relax, Reid, just close your eyes.”

He nodded and she went back to work, bobbing her head up and down gently.  He whimpered as she placed a hand at the base of his cock, beginning to pump it with her mouth.  His hand found it’s way into her hair that dangled over his thighs and he tugged each time her mouth squeezed around him.

His whimpers turned to cries of pleasure and soon he found himself teetering over the edge.

“I’m ready, please,”

She pulled away and clambered over him, kissing his lips with desire and hunger that neither of them had felt.

“I-Is this your first time?” he asked quietly.

She pulled away and smiled at him before shaking his head, “It’s been a long time, but it isn’t my first,”

“A-Are you sure you want me-”

“Nothing will ever change my mind about you, and I hope that it doesn’t change your mind about me,”

“Of course it doesn’t,” he said as he ran his thumb over her cheekbone.

She smiled, “All that matters is that I love you and I want to this to be everything you want and more.”

Tears brimmed his eyes once more and he kissed her forehead, “I love you too,”

She pulled him close and laid back on the bed as his body towered over hers, a hunger in his eyes that made her nearly come undone on the spot.  Slowly he peeled her panties away and off her legs, his eyes never leaving her own.

“You can look, Spencer,”

His eyes traveled down her body and to her throbbing core.  His hands roamed over her body and shook with excitement.  She placed a hand over his own and guided it to her center, nodding.

His hands explored her folds delicately, rubbing her nub when her moans became louder.  She was dripping for him and it made him so hungry for her.

He reached for his erect cock, stroking it slightly before lining himself up with her.  She leaned up on her elbows and placed a hand over his, guiding himself closer to her entrance.  She held his gaze and urged him to push, “We can go slow,”

He nodded before finally leaning into her, pushing his entire length inside of her.  His moans carried over hers and he shuddered, leaning over her body to take some deep breaths.  She arched her back with a hand around his neck, moaning his name.

He twitched inside of her at the sound of his name and immediately felt the urge to begin pumping in and out of her slowly.  His movements were soft and agile, paying close attention to her body language and slowly figuring out what she liked best.

“Does it hurt?” he asked timidly.

She shook her head, “It feels perfect, Spence.” she said breathily.

He finally pulled away to look at her as he sped up his pace.  Her breasts were bouncing with each thrust he gave and her lips were parted in what seemed bliss.  Her eyes were squeezed shut, but her eyebrows were knitted in ecstasy.  The sweat covering her body made her shine in the lights of the city coming in from the windows.  

She looked like an angel, he thought.

Her eyes open and he slowed his thrusting, holding her wide-eyed stare.  She smiled up at him and let loose a small laugh, one that he loved so much.  She pulled him close and kissed him deeply as he stopped inside of her.

“I-Is everything okay-?”

“I just wanted to look at you,” she whispered as she ran a thumb over his nose.

Spencer smiled, tears pooling in his orbs once again.  They trailed over his cheeks and onto her own, the emotion slowly building up in her.  Soon she had tears of her own spilling down the sides of her face.

“Happy tears?” he asked her, placing her hair behind her ear.

She nodded, “Happy tears.”

He smiled before placing a very passionate kiss on her lips, beginning to move inside of her once again.  Spencer watched her very closely as she began to squirm even more beneath his body.

“G-God I’m so close,” he breathed out, “Jesus. . .”

She looked up to him and held his gaze as his thrusting turned into pounding as he held himself to her.  His eyes finally met hers and she watched as he came undone inside of her.  The moans of her name in her ear sent her coming quickly undone as well, clinging to him with desperate cries of pleasure as he finished the last of his bucking hips against her.

For awhile they laid there, tangled in each other’s limbs and coming down from the pleasurable high.  She tangled her hands into his messy curls and massage his head, his breath heavy against her neck.

He finally pulled out of her, another moan coming from both of them.

He leaned down and kissed her long and hard, his tongue probing the insides of her mouth gently.  She giggled against his lips and pulled him down next to her.  Propped up on her elbows she placed a hand on his chest and drew soft circles.  He smiled up at her, studying her face.

“That was incredible,” he said quietly, placing a hand on her cheek.

She turned to him, “Was it everything you expected?” she looked away from his eyes with a sad look.

He frowned, “It was everything and so much more,” he made her look at him, “I feel closer to you than I ever have with anyone else in my life before.”

She let out a small, happy sob at his words.  Leaning into him she kissed the palm of his calloused hand smiled up at him, “It’s not an earthly feeling, is it?”

He shook his head and patted the spot next to him.  She quickly snuggled under the covers and nuzzled up to his chest.

“I don’t think anything can explain this,”

She scoffed, “Doctor Spencer Reid is stumped?”

THE MASTERLIST | REQUEST DETAILS

[chibivesicle]

Golden Kamuy chapters 265 & 266. The reunion we’ve been waiting for.

After the flashback told by Kiro on their way to break Sofia out of prison in Russia, we learned about Tsurumi’s past as a spy in Vladivostok and his family who died in his encounter with the Russian secret police.

It has been a long time coming for that flashback to be connected to present day (well in the manga timeline) Tsurumi and Sofia.

The cover page has an image of Tsurumi with Olga and Fina seen through a keyhole.  I want to know - who is the person looking through the keyhole at them?

Is this supposed to be symbolic of Tsukishima and Koito listening to him?

The chapter starts off with Kikuta meeting up with Koito and Tsukishima as they realized not everyone made it to the rendezvous point.  Of course they then quickly decide to separate, but tell Koito to stay behind.

Kikuta and Tsukishima separate and we learn that Ariko and Kantaro catch up to Hijikata as he states they are going to rescue Asirpa.  Sofia’s men also state they are going to rescue Sofia.  Everyone is still converging on the same point.

Koito carefully decides to go back and investigate because he was concerned by Tsurumi’s facial expression upon meeting Sofia.  He knows there is more to the story and he’s not just going to blindly follow Tsurumi’s orders.

Of course, he catches Tsukishima doing the same thing!  I love how he tries to pull rank on Tsukishima but not really.

Their argument is kind of adorable in a way - both men are trying to understand what is going on in a pot calling the kettle black sort of way.

Tsukishima may have sunk low when he tried to stop Tanigaki and Inkarmat, but the time on Karafuto changed both of them.  He revealed to Koito how he had been manipulated by Tsurumi and tried his best to keep on keeping on, but Koito had stopped him from that direction.

What is more interesting is to learn that Koito didn’t even realize that when he spoke to Tsurumi normally at the brewery!  As a reader I had made a poor assumption where I thought he had realized he spoke normally, but it seems to have been lost in the heat of the moment and only Tsukishima picked up on it.

Tsukishima points out the obvious to Koito and I love how he finally realizes this with a little sweat.  Koito had been so into well just doing things, that he needed to be reminded of what he had done.

Tsurumi then sends Nikaido out to allow him to talk to Sofia and Asirpa undisturbed and even double checks that the church is empty!  Which they had already done when Tsukishima and Koito were with him!  Tsurumi does one more check of the rooms as the two men hide under a desk or table of some sort.

Tsukishima wonders if Tsurumi is going to discuss something that he doesn’t want any of his subordinates to hear.  Tsukishima looks upset and angry about this while Koito seems more concerned.  Sofia and Asirpa are tied up and tied to a pew in the church.

There is a flashback where Sofia noticed the photos in the stove of Hasegawa’s photo studio and she grabbed the one of her with Kiro and Wilk. Tsurumi then sites down in a chair across from them in a relaxed posture.

Sofia comes to and realizes that she’s tied up and then notices Asirpa next to her.  Tsurumi finally removes the gag from Asirpa and comments that wearing her headband suits her as the special child of the ainu.

She’s unsure how to reply to the comment and Tsurumi states he’s glad to talk to her.  He then mentions Sofia Golden Hand and talks about meeting again.

Sofia of course wants to know who he is and he controls the conversation by discussing that it has been 18 years since they last met.  He then holds up the photo and refers to her by her fake name she used when they were in Vladivostok.  Only then can she put the pieces together slowly (I mean she took quite a beating before being brought to the church).

Tsurumi then presents the finger bones of Fina and Olga to Sofia while we see the view of the door keyhole.

Of course Tsukishima is the one watching while Koito listens through the door.  We get Tsukishima’s flashback to when he saw Tsurumi with the finger bones alone with bare feet.

Tsukishima now has the names of the people the bones belonged to.  Sofia bewildered asks him if he is Mr. Hasegawa.

She has figured out who this mysterious Japanese man is and what her relationship to him is.  Tsurumi calmly thanks her for recognizing and remembering as his weird brain fluid leaks.  Sofia is speechless as Asirpa begins to apply what she knows - asking if the photo is of Wilk and Kiro - and if it was taken in Russia as she recalls Kiro’s story that first introduced Sofia to her.

Koito is concerned to learn that Tsurumi was married with a family and he then turns to look at Tsukishima who is clearly upset.  He is very pissed off at Tsurumi.

It is clear that Tsukishima likely knows more that is making him this angry about the situation.

The chapter ends with a confident looking Tsurumi.  He reveals that they recovered letters from Kiro’s possessions which included the ones sent back and forth with Sofia.  He then suggests that they talk to Asirpa together. . . .

so that they can explain what happened to the Ainu.  It begins to rain harder, likely reflecting the tears around everyone in this situation and the quest for the gold.

Being an intelligence officer, I’m going to think that Tsukishima likely handed over the letters to Tsurumi not knowing about the milk ink, and was left in the dark as Tsurumi kept this information to himself. 

We know Kiro wouldn’t have been dumb enough to use actual ink.  Though, I wonder why Kiro kept the letters from Sofia.  Either he thought no one else would crack them or he did it for nostalgic reasons and his unrequited love of her.

I honestly expected more from this chapter.  For a long awaited ‘reunion’ of sorts it falls flat for me.  I wanted more from Tsurumi.  I wanted more from Sofia.  The character development and decisions from Tsukishima and Koito are predictable as they continue to think for themselves in the hunt for the gold. 

And where is Kikuta off to?  Find Ogata who is currently preoccupied with Vasily?  I had high hopes for things and it fell short.

So with that, let’s slide into 266 - pinky finger bones that has Tsurumi and Tsukishima wearing civilian clothes in Vladivostok.

Tsurumi quizzes Tsukishima on the meaning of the name of Vladivostok and Tsurumi explains the strategic importance of such a location.

A random Russian man then approaches Tsukishima.  He is curious if they are Japanese as he wants to talk about a random Japanese man.

Tsukishima frantically flips through a book (likely a dictionary for translation) as he asks the man to slow down so he can look up some things.  He then realizes after the man approached them that Tsurumi walked away quickly.

There is a burn out building and Tsurumi is standing outside of it, the brim of his hat shading his eyes as Tsukishima is breathing heavily implying he ran after him.  Tsukishima slowly reads the sign which reads ‘Hasegawa Photograph’ and he immediately comments that it was the name the Russian man had mentioned.  And that he had a wife and daughter, but the fate of them was not stated.  Quickly, Tsukishima asks if Hasegawa was someone Tsurumi knew.

Tsurumi says no but with a pause, there are lots of Japanese people living there and he must have been odd.  This clearly tells us that Tsukishima knows that Tsurumi lived in Vladivostok before!  He does his best to avoid looking at Tsukishima in his reply.

Tsukishima keeps thinking about the name as Tsurumi walks away from the remains of the studio.  It is then that Tsukishima mentions that Tsurumi’s mother’s maiden name was also Hasegawa, since they traveled to pay respects to his mother in Niigata.

Tsurumi remarks that Tsukishima remembers well and then tries to state it is a common last name in the area. 

The action returns to the resent where Tsukishima confirms that the Hasegawa he was asked about was indeed Tsurumi.

He begins to discuss what he knows about the Ainu gold, were about 50 years ago, 1860s, a more radical element of the Ainu were trying to rebel against the shogunate.  They sought to purchase munitions and arms from the Russian Imperial Navy - but the ship sank and they were left with the gold and nothing to purchase.  Tsurumi skips ahead to the fact that Wilk was in search of the gold, and Asirpa realizes that the man who taught Sofia, Kiro and Wilk Japanese had to have been Tsurumi.

Sofia, clearly in shock hangs her head as she recalls meeting Olga and Fina and enjoying their time together.  Tsurumi catches her attention by holding the finger bones in his hand before her. It is clear he’s trying to manipulate her to reveal as much information as possible by guilt tripping her.  Tsurumi looks totally creepy as he holds his head at an odd angle looking down at her.

He reveals that he was the only wanted man that day.  He knows that she found the wanted poster about Wilk and returned to warn him.

Because the three of them approached him and his studio, it is possible that Fina and Olga would have lived.  Sofia is barely holding things together.  She’s sweating, her eyes are stressed and it seems she’s moments away from losing it.  Kiro explained that Sofia felt guilty about what happened to Fina and Olga, even though it was unclear what happened that day.

Tsukishima and Koito are thinking about what Tsurumi has told them and others in the 27th previously.  That controlling the land where their comrades feel should remain in Japanese hands so that they can rest in peace. 

But a full page spread where both men’s veins are bulging as they wonder if Tsurumi’s true goal -

is related to morning his dead wife and daughter by making Vladivostok a part of Japan so he could honor them.  All in all a very ‘petty’ goal for a man asking others to fight and die for him.  That isn’t what Koito or Tsukishima want to do in the army for obvious reasons.

Tsurumi continues to interrogate Sofia.  He wants her to validate the deaths of Fina and Olga.  Talk about really putting on the psychological pressure!  Tsurumi wants to know what Kiro told her.  He makes it clear by referring to Kiro as Yulbars and frames it as the sacrifice of his wife and child.

Tsukishima is wondering why he’s questioning her about something that happened 18 years ago.  It seems like this line of interrogation is out of revenge and doesn’t serve a functional purpose.

Sofia weeps and finally speaks.  Yulbars told her that Wilk changed because Asirpa was born.  This goes back to what Kiro told Inkarmat at Abashiri - Inkarmat wanted to know how Kiro could kill Wilk, and he replied that he had changed.

So, really, Tsurumi already knew this.  Inkarmat told them that he said ‘Wilk had changed’.  Why confirming this from Sofia makes sense is beyond me at the moment as a reader.  Kiro stated this clearly - it wasn’t like he was hiding the info. . . . maybe Noda realizes that Abashiri was a long time ago in the context of the manga?  Or that Tsurumi wants to have confirmation from another source about Wilk changing.  Does he need an irrational amount of evidence?  Or does he want to torture Sofia as much as possible by dragging up the past?

The chapter ends with Shiraishi and Sugimoto watching Koito sneak back into the church.  They conclude that Asirpa must be there and that they should do something.  Sugimoto begrudgingly states they need Hijikata’s assistance as Shiraishi is surprised at his restraint.

Their attempt to drive forth and find others results in them crashing into a likely telegraph pole and they fly out of the beer bottle car. 

I guess Noda wanted to end the chapter with a joke but it seems to fall short.  I hope they don’t do anything stupid that complicates the rescue of Asirpa.

These two chapters have brought the reunion of Tsurumi and Sofia about, but I’m unsure if it has been effective as I would have expected for such a huge reader ‘payoff’.  Sofia is shocked to learn that Hasegawa is alive and clearly wants some sort of revenge on her for her actions.  Tsukishima and Koito know too much about his possible highly personal goals.  Neither of them serve under Tsurumi so that the bodies of his family can be on Japanese soil.  It seems like such a petty reason to try to use the gold to establish a military state on Hokkaido.

I am glad that Tsukishima and Koito are thinking about their actions and may finally consider their blind faith in Tsurumi.

As I previously stated, I’m still unsure what confirmation that Kiro concluding that ‘Wilk changed’ from both Inkarmat and Sofia does to help Tsurumi out.

I’m personally disappointed that Kiro didn’t destroy the letters that Sofia sent him.  I’d say it is obvious that when Tsurumi got them, he knew exactly what to do with the letters as a former spy.  I wonder if Tsukishima feels left out since he likely read the letters and didn’t know what to make of the nonsense that Kiro and Sofia exchanged?

I hope that Sugimoto and Shiraishi don’t mess things up even worse.  What ever Tsurumi discusses with her - I feel that it is something that she alone needs to hear and decide how to respond as the figure at the center of the quest for the gold.

I can’t write a meta without wondering what Ogata is up to?  Having him distracted with a sniper battle with Vasily seems to be a waste of his effort and attention, unless Kikuta is going to get mixed up with them?

Well that’s all I’ve got for now.  I’m behind and need to catch up on the next chapter!

[meowmerson]

Can you write a Tomione doctor AU? I’ve always thought it would be really cute if they were surgeons.

perhaps…………………a nurse/patient AU????????????? :)

(only because i was trying to think of a story for doctor tomione but my brain kept going back to this so i hope its ok, if it s not you can send me another ask DEMANDING A SURGEON AU and i promise i will brainstorm an idea)

(also uh im sorry i made it really long)

–

It’s the tail end of the night shift when she sees him, although the first time is fleeting. Fleeting, but not irrelevant. 

He’s flanked by six guards from the prison. He looks like he’s in pain, and quite a lot of it. He’s wheeled in on a hospital bed to room 119 and she watches from the reception desk as he and his entourage of prison guards pass her by in almost slow motion. 

“What timing,” Lavender said with a cheeky grin, “Your shift just ended. You’ll miss out on all the fun.”

“Your idea of fun,” Hermione corrected, completing her chart for the night, “My idea of fun involves going home, having breakfast with my daughter, taking her to school, and going to sleep,” She put her pen down and smiled in the face of Lavender’s pout, “But enjoy the day shift with the clearly dangerous criminal.”

“Tell Rose I said hi,” Lavender said. 

Hermione went home and did exactly as she said she would. She paid the babysitter, laid down in Rose’s bed for a moment before gently waking her. She smiled at her 3-year-old daughter across bowls of cheerios and listened to her talk about what she dreamt about the night before. Then she dressed Rose, brought her to pre-school, kissed her goodbye, and returned home. She fell asleep in her scrubs, and didn’t dream about the man flanked by prison guards. 

–

Hermione worked nights for a few reasons. The biggest one was the amount of time she got to spend with her daughter - she could always skimp on sleep to spend more time with Rose, but she couldn’t exactly skip work, and if she only worked while Rose was sleeping (save for a few precious hours at night) it meant she would never need to miss a school play, a birthday party, pancakes on sundays, or pillow forts in their living room. She could see all of that. 

Nights were quieter too. No visitors, some patients slept but some didn’t, Lavender only worked day shifts so Hermione only ever saw her for an hour at most if their shifts overlapped which was about as much of Lavender as she could take. And no visitors, god Hermione hated visitors. 

She worked 3 nights a week, sometimes 4 if she needed the money and they had an overtime shift for her. She was always tired, always a bit stressed, and her hair had never looked worse than it did in motherhood, but it was all worth it for the time she got to spend with her daughter. 

She had to remember that, when she had nights like this one. 

“Apparently he hasn’t urinated in a week,” Neville said, “He had a pretty severe blatter infection and sepsis but is steadily getting better,”

“Why hadn’t he urinated?” Hermione asked, and Neville shrugged. 

“They think it might be an escape plan, so uh,” he none-too-subtly leaned to the side to peer at the guards outside room 119, “They’re keeping an eye on him.”

“How is he?” She asked.

“Horrible,” He answered, “Right bastard, gave Lavender hell all day on his first day in, didn’t sleep all night, then we gave him to Minerva–”

“Well, surely she set him straight,” Hermione interjected.

Neville laughed, but there was no humor in it, “Yeah well, she handled it fine, but she also said if we give him to her as a patient again she’s going to retire.”

“Shit,” Hermione sighed. She thought of Rose, asleep in her bed and thought of seeing her in the morning and waking her up for breakfast, “So naturally you give him to me.”

“Well,” He shrugged, looking sheepish, “It was either you or me, so…”

“So you sweet-talked the charge nurse into giving you an easy night?” Hermione quirked a brow and Neville just grinned. Hermione sighed, picked up the chart, and turned to face Room 119. 

There were only two guards now, not six, and they nodded at her as she entered. 

Tom Riddle sat on the bed in a room of his own, he looked pale, with dark circles under his eyes, and he fixed his eyes disconcertingly on her the moment she stepped through the door. 

“My name is Hermione,” She said, putting gloves on at the door, “I’ll be your nurse tonight.”

“Is that so?” He asked. His voice was deep, but gravelly. He must be exhausted, she thought, if he truly hadn’t slept since he arrived. 

“How are you feeling?” She asked, but before he could answer she added, “I hear you haven’t slept since–”

“How can I sleep?” He cut her off, “Sitting in a hospital bed with a new nurse every few hours asking me the same inane questions?”

Hermione paused, observed him for a moment. She had dealt with plenty of difficult patients, was used to biting her tongue and slapping a smile on her face. He kept staring at her with dark eyes, his jaw clenched, and she knew what she was in for. 

“Well, Mr. Riddle,” Hermione said with a smile, “I will endeavor not to ask the same inane questions, then.” She stepped closer, made a vague gesture in his direction and asked, “May I?”

He was receiving fluids, antibiotics, seemed stable, she just needed to check his blood pressure to be sure. The fact that he obviously hadn’t slept wasn’t a good sign and certainly wouldn’t help in his recovery. He nodded once, tersely, and she glanced back at the guards at the door. 

“Is it because of the guards that you won’t sleep?” She asked as she took his blood pressure. His brow twitched, but he didn’t look away from her face.

“If I said yes, would you take them away?” He asked her. She looked up from her work to meet his eye and tried to figure out if he was making a joke. 

Either way she laughed, shook her head, and said, “I think we would both love that, but no, unfortunately not.”

His blood pressure was low, but according to his chart improving. It would probably help if he slept. She met his gaze, he was still watching her. “Your blood pressure is low.” She told him, “You should sleep.”

“I should sleep?” He echoed, his brow rose like he was talking down to a child, “Close my eyes, and dream?” He looked almost crazed, she thought. She wasn’t sure if that was the lack of sleep, the time he spent in prison, or maybe it was just who he was. Either way, she didn’t move - it was always better not to react when a patient became angry. “Let the medication take effect, while the rest of you skirt around me like an animal in cage–”

“Sir–” She interjected, but he spoke over her. 

“While men with guns fantasize about the possibility of turning those very guns on me while I sleep and while I continue to be denied visitors that I would typically be allowed to see simply because I am unwell–” She sighed and made to move away as he worked himself up, but he grabbed her arm. She met his eyes again “–Don’t pretend to be concerned for my health, nurse,” He spat, “Shut your mouth, treat me, and keep your inane thoughts to yourself, lest I lose my temper.”

“Hey!” A guard from the door called, took a step into the room. Hermione held out a hand to stop him, “Miss–” 

“Please let me do my job!” She said, turning to hold a hand out more firmly against the guard at the door. He hesitated, shifted his weight on his feet. “Return to your post, please.”

The guard very pointedly looked at the place where Mr. Riddle’s hand was on her arm. Hermione looked at that same hand, then back at the guard, and she hoped she was communicating every ounce of annoyance she felt in that stare.

The guard returned to his post. 

Hermione’s gently pried Tom Riddle’s fingers from her arm. “It was merely a suggestion,” She said and met his eyes with a smile, “Stay awake if you wish.”

He was stable, so she turned to leave the room. The guard stopped her at the door. “Hey, uh–” He said, glancing into the room and back at her, “Could I get a sandwich?”

She looked him up and down. 

“It’s just, we’ve been here all day, I’m pretty hungry.”

“No,” She snapped, “We don’t give sandwiches to the guards, they’re for the patients.”

“Well, he’s not going to eat it.” He said, gesturing toward Room 119 with his head. Hermione, taken aback, glanced into the room and saw Mr. Riddle’s eyes fixed on her before she looks back at the guard.

“Don’t ask me again,” She said, and walked away. 

–

That night, she had Mr. Riddle with the temper and the armed guards, Mrs. Sprout with the lovely disposition recovering from a severe allergic reaction, and Mr. Crouch the drug seeker in the hospital for a broken leg who wouldn’t stop screaming for opiates, and Mr. Riddle’s stupid fucking guard who kept asking her for sandwiches.

It was a long night. 

“What is he in for, anyway?” Padma asked, looking toward Hermione for an answer. She didn’t have to specify who - obviously she meant the one with the guards. Hermione shrugged - she really didn’t know.

“Like everything.” Neville said, pouring himself a coffee while Padma patiently awaited her cup. “He’s in jail for life for everything from selling weed to killing people and chopping them up.”

“No way,” Padma said.

“Yes way,” Neville took a sip from his coffee and shrugged, “You heard about him - he went by Voldemort.”

Padma gasped, turned and faced Hermione with wide eyes and a wide-open mouth, “Hermione, you’re treating Voldemort,”

“I’m treating a very irritable prison patient” Hermione corrected, “And not for the first time.”

“He was all over the news last year!” Padma said, clearly distressed, “He’s crazy - and I heard he didn’t piss for a week to be sent here, this is probably all his plan or–”

“Padma, drop it.” Hermione snapped. “There are two guards outside his room, a guard at the lifts, a guard at each stairwell and at the front entrance of the hospital. Mr. Riddle is in a hospital bed recovering from sepsis.” She stood up, “I suggest we all stop panicking and help him to recover, like it’s our job to do.”

She left the break room and glanced toward Room 119 and saw only one guard.

“Excuse me!” She called, hurrying toward the singular guard, “Excuse me,” She said again, peeking into the room. Mr. Riddle was still awake, watching her as she appeared in the doorway. She looked at the guard, “Where the hell is the other one?”

“Miss, please calm down.” The guard said. 

“Where is he?” She asked again, “Where has he gone - doesn’t he have a job to do?”

“He stepped away for a moment.”

“Stepped away where?” She demanded.

“Calm down, nurse,” A voice said, and she turned her head to see the guard approaching with a sandwich in his hand. 

“Where did you get that?” She asked quietly, a familiar feeling of annoyance mixed with rage in her chest, the kind that only comes after a long night of work on very little sleep.

“The vending machine downstairs.” He said, shrugging. He started to open the package, but Hermione snatched it out of his hands. 

“This nurse has a name,” She said, “It’s Hermione Granger, and I expect you to use it. And no one,” She lifted the sandwich to eye level, right in his face, “Is going to be eating any sandwiches here except for Mr. Riddle, as he is the patient. The rest of us will do our jobs and eat when we’re done.”

The guard laughed, “Okay, okay, just give me back the–” He reached for it and she snatched it away. His smile fell off his face. 

She marched into the room, tearing open the package and thrusting it toward Mr. Riddle in his bed. 

“He doesn’t want it!” The Guard protested.

“Yes he does,” Hermione snapped, and turned back toward Mr. Riddle in the bed, who was staring oddly at her. “Don’t you, Mr Riddle?”

He just stared at her. She thought maybe he would have another temper tantrum and start yelling. “Take it,” She encouraged gently, “Please.”

To her surprise, he did. He took the sandwich and took a bite, watching her all the while. 

She smiled. 

“There,” She said, turning back toward the guard, “Don’t leave your post again or I will inform your superior.”

She left the room, grateful that Mr. Riddle didn’t have another one of his outbursts this time. 

Her shift was nearly over anyway. 

–

When she returned home, she laid down in Rose’s bed minutes before she was meant to wake. 

“Mummy?” Rose murmured.

“Good morning,” Hermione whispered.

“I dreamed you were a kangaroo.” Rose said.  Hermione laughed. 

“Were you a Joey?” Hermioned asked. 

“No,” She said, “I’m a Rose.”

Hermione laughed again, “A Joey is a baby kangaroo,” She explained. 

“Oh,” Rose said, and then, “Can we have cheerios?”

Hermione loved these moments more than anything.

She watched Rose over bowls of Cheerios again. She would gladly spend every morning, every moment like this. She thought of the loneliness she felt when she first found out she was pregnant, the boundless love she felt when she held her in her arms for the first time, the feeling in her chest like she was going to explode with happiness when the nurse handed over her baby, wrapped in a white blanket.

She dreamed of a life where she could have this always, no interruptions. 

–

She returned to work the next night. 

“Why the hell do I have Riddle again?” She asked when she looked at the assignments for the night. Lavender was there, the tail end of her shift, and she raised her eyebrows and looked away. “What?” Hermione pressed. 

Minerve spoke up, “He asked for you.”

“He what?” Hermione balked. 

“Fucking screamed about it,” Lavender muttered, “I tried to bring him something to help him sleep and he slapped it out of my hand and said he wouldn’t take anything from the hand of a whore.”

“He said what?” 

“He’s crazy,” Lavender said, “Fucking crazy, good luck Hermione, you’ll need it.”

And she left like that, clearly furious. Hermione looked to Minerva, but Minerva said nothing, simply raised her eyebrows in the way she always did and left to start her rounds. 

The guards outside the room were different than the night before. They nodded to her as she entered. Mr Riddle watched her, looking more tired than ever. 

“Miss Granger,” He greeted. 

“Mr. Riddle,” Hermione replied, smiling, “I heard you were asking for me.”

“You’re my favorite nurse.” He said. 

“Already?” Hermione asked, “Well, it sounds like you aren’t giving anyone else much of a chance.”

“I liked seeing you with McLaggen yesterday.” He said. Hermione wasn’t sure what he meant, and that must have shown on her face, because he said, “The guard.”

“Ah,” She nodded, and added, “You know, this version of you doesn’t exactly match up with the man who apparently slapped medication out of a nurse’s hand and called her a whore.”

“That nurse,” Riddle said as Hermione read over his chart and set about checking his vitals, “goes between speaking to me like I’m a child, and speaking to me like I’m a war criminal.”

“Sometimes you act like both,” Hermione said. 

Mr. Riddle snapped his eyes to meet hers, and it took that for her to realize he finally hadn’t been staring at her. But he was now. Hermione blinked, and then realized what she just said. 

“I hope you won’t start slapping me and calling me a whore.” She said, a poor attempt at a joke.

He smiled then, and it struck her that despite the dark circles around his bloodshot eyes, despite his pale skin and gaunt cheeks he really was sinfully handsome. “You wouldn’t like that?” He asked. 

“No,” Hermione said firmly, and trying to change the subject she asked, “Are you hungry?”

“I am,” He said, but before she could be too pleased by his cooperation, he continued, “But first I have a question.”

“Yes?” She prompted. 

“How old are you?” He asked. 

She smiled. Such a random question, such a strangely serene patient. “I’m 27.”

“You look older,” He said, and she couldn’t help but breathe out a short laugh. “I don’t mean any offense,” He continued, “I mean that you don’t hold yourself like most people your age.”

“I’m sorry, I’m not sure what you mean.”

“The way you look. Like someone who has a large amount of responsibility and wisdom. A teacher, a scholar,” Hermione was taking her gloves off when he said, “Or a mother.”

She paused. She watched him for a long moment in silence. The guards stood silently outside the door.

“I apologize,” Mr. Riddle said, “I am only trying to make conversation. 

“Are you a father?” She asked him, and he laughed. Twice she’d seen him smile now. 

“No,” He said, “I never had time.”

She thought about what Padma and Neville said in the breakroom, thought about the armed guards at every exit. She wondered why he was asking her these questions, why he was here, why he had forced himself to become ill enough to end up in the hospital, she wondered…

“I have a daughter.” She admitted. Because here he was a man, receiving treatment, and she refused to treat him like an animal. 

“Does she look like you?” He asked her, “Or her father?”

She smiled, a bit tightly, and didn’t answer. 

He did a funny thing then - hie eyes narrowed just a bit, he tilted his head, and his mouth twisted in what wasn’t quite a smile but couldn’t be defined as anything else. 

“I’ll get you something to eat.” Hermione said, “Do you want something to help you sleep?”

“Not yet,” He said, “I don’t want to sleep while you’re here.”

Her stomach twisted at that, and she a strange, nervous feeling made her hands twitch, as if there was something humming just underneath her skin. 

“I’ll bring you some food.” She said. 

“Thank you, Hermione.” He said. 

The guards watched her as she left the room. 

–

He was the easiest patient she ever had. 

He let her run his IV, administer the antibiotics, check his vitals, all without any complaints, just a few odd questions. He didn’t ask about her daughter again, perhaps because he noted that she became uncomfortable when he did. Instead, he asked what her parents did for a living, he asked where she was from, he asked irrelevant things like her favorite flower and how she took her tea. 

He was much chattier than she expected him to be. 

“Miss Granger,” Minerva said in the break room, using her surname as if she was a patient. She always did that. “How has Mr. Riddle been?”

“Fine, actually.” Hermione said. “The guards are more difficult than he is, although the ones tonight aren’t so bad. They’re quiet.”

Minerva raised a single eyebrow and said nothing else. 

Hermione gave Tom Riddle a sleeping pill at the end of her shift, and he took it with a smile.

–

“Do you have to go?” Rose asked. 

It was 7:00pm. The babysitter had just arrived and Hermione was dressed in her scrubs ready to go to work for the third night in a row and Rose was crying. Hermione brushed her daughter’s hair out of her face and felt her heart wrench. 

��I’m sorry, darling,” She said, “I’ll be back in the morning, just like always.”

“But I want you to read me a story,” Rose sniffled, snot running out of her nose. She wiped at it messily with the back of her hand. “I want you to read me a bedtime story.”

“I’ll read you a story in the morning, I promise.” Hermione said, “I’ll come back home, just like always, in the morning. When you wake up I’ll be right there next to you.”

She never once wished that Rose’s father was around - he didn’t even know he had a child, and Hermione would keep it that way - but in moments like this, she always wished she wasn’t alone. Maybe it would be easier that way. 

Rose wouldn’t stop crying. Hermione had to shut the door on her crying and begging her mother not to leave. 

–

“Again?” Hermione snapped as soon as she saw the assignments for the night. “Again? Seriously?”

“Stop complaining,” Lavender snapped, “Everyone knows he’s an angel with you.”

“Why are you still here?” Hermione snapped back, and Lavender glowered back at her. 

“I’m just leaving,” She said, “He has given me hell ever since he woke up, so good fucking luck.”

She watched Lavender storm out, but the only thing she really took from that conversation was that he finally got some rest. She looked at Room 119, saw the guards outside the door. McLaggen, the annoying one, he still wasn’t there - it was the same guards from the night before. 

She started toward the room, and the guards watched her closely as they always did. They nodded to her as she entered the room.

And she stopped short. 

A tall, blonde man was sat by Mr. Riddle’s bed. He had one of Riddle’s hands clasped between his, and looked as if he was saying something quite passionately before Hermione interrupted. 

Visitors weren’t allowed on the night shift. 

Tom Riddle wasn’t meant to have visitors at all.

“What the hell is this?” Hermione asked, quietly, let the low tone of her voice fill the room that was silent except for the steady beating of Mr. Riddle’s heart monitor. 

Tom Riddle blinked at her, and said nothing. 

“No visitors.” She said firmly, and turned toward the guards, “Why the hell does he have a visitor?”

The guards looked at each other, and then her, and said nothing. 

She turned toward the blonde man, feeling as if she was in a dream or on a TV show, something that couldn’t be real life, “Get out.” She snapped, “No visitors - what part of no visitors do you not understand? Who let you in here?”

“Nurse,” The blonde man snapped, holding up a finger as if to say ‘wait, one second, “Give us a moment.”

“No, I will not give you a moment.” Hermione snapped, “No visitors. Period. You need to leave.” She turned to the guards, “Excuse me?” She threw up her hands, hoping they would soon understand the ridiculousness of the situation. “Get him out.”

The guards walked in, finally, and said, “Sir, it’s time to leave.”

“No, it is not time to leave.” The blonde man snapped. He must come from money, Hermione thought, that was the only thing that would explain his tone. “We are having a private conversation, so if you don’t mind–”

“Abraxas,” Mr. Riddle interjected. “Do as Hermione asks.”

First, the blonde man - Abraxas - screwed up his face and looked at Mr. Riddle like he thought he was crazy. Then he looked at Hermione, and back at Tom. His expression changed, flattened out, like he suddenly understood something, then he turned his eyes back to Hermione and stared. 

He just stared and stared, his expression unreadable, in a way that made Hermione acutely uncomfortable. 

“Goodbye, sir,” She said, then turned to the guards and said, “Could you both do your job, please?”

“No need,” Abraxas said, his tone quieter, less snobby, less snippy. “I’ll see myself out.”

He reached down and clasped Mr. Riddle’s hand once more, but said nothing. Then he left.

Hermione shut her eyes and took a deep breath, tried to shut the anger away. She felt on edge tonight, it started with the way she left her daughter and was only made worse with all this bullshit. She turned on the guards again, who were returning to their post. 

“No visitors.” She snapped, “At all.”

One of the guards nodded tersely. Neither said anything. 

She turned back to Mr. Riddle, who was watching her patiently from his bed. 

She shouldn’t mention it to him. She knew he could get nasty, she shouldn’t try his temper, she should try to have a nice night at work, but she couldn’t help herself. “You know you aren’t allowed visitors.” She said.

“I know.” He agreed, “I apologize. He always visited me in custody - it is a wasted effort to try and explain to him that anything should be different here.”

“Seems its a wasted effort to explain anything to him at all.” Hermione snarked, pulling on her rubber gloves. Mr. Riddle chuckled.

“You aren’t wrong,” He agreed, and watched her very closely as she approached the bed, “You seem agitated.”

“How are you feeling?” She asked, ignoring his observation. 

“I am steadily improving,” He said, “How are you feeling?”

“I’m doing just fine,” She said, moving to take his blood pressure. He caught her arm, far more gentle than the last time he touched her. 

“Hermione,” He said her name quietly, reverently, it made her stop in her tracks for a moment. “I can tell that you aren’t.”

She met his eyes then. She had no desire to entertain whatever delusions he was experiencing, whatever it was he thought was going on here. She wanted to get on with her job and return home to her daughter and let him be dragged back to prison. 

“I am frustrated that the patients of this hospital are incapable of following basic instructions, and concerned about how incapable the guards outside your room seem to be at doing their job.” She said, “I would like to check your vitals, and then go about my job. I have patients other than you, Mr. Riddle.”

His jaw clenched. He let go of her arm. 

She went about her business, and he let her. No questions, no comments, no interruptions. It felt strange, charged, she found that she preferred it when he asked her odd questions. 

Abruptly, she felt guilty. Not because she felt like Mr. Riddle didn’t deserve to be told off, because she believed that he did. But it was her job to be his nurse, not anything else, and she had no business telling him off when he was being nothing but polite. She always hated the idea of someone being treated like a burden, or an animal, or anything other than a person in need of human interaction, and who was she to tell off the patient when it was the guards and the nursing staff who allowed it to happen in the first place?

“My daughter,” She said after a long stretch of silence, “She was crying when I left. I hate to leave her like that.”

“It must be difficult,” He said, not missing a beat, as if he was ready for her to break the silence. “Raising her on your own.” 

“Yes,” She agreed, “It is. I wish I could be with her all the time.”

“You are a good mother.” He told her. 

She stopped her work, raised her head to meet his eyes again. He was always staring at her so intensely, in a way that made her hair stand on end. 

She couldn’t help herself when she asked him, “Why do you have armed guards all throughout the hospital guarding you?”

He smiled, “Because I’m a prisoner.” He told her. 

“I can’t imagine you committing a crime so terrible you need to be brought in by six guards.” She admitted. 

He smiled, and said nothing else. 

And something about the way he looked away from her then, looked toward the guards, still smiling, like something about this whole situation was deeply amusing that made her think; it truly wasn’t so far fetched. 

And remember the way he acted to people other than herself, remembering the way he somehow had a visitor with the permission of the guards and the nursing staff, she wondered why she had thought it was far-fetched, even for a minute.

She needed some air. 

“Are you hungry?” She asked.

“Yes,” He answered, “But not yet.”

A strange answer, but Hermione just nodded and left the room. 

The guards, as always, watched her as she left.

–

Hermione researched Voldemort on her break.

Neville wasn’t wrong, he was in prison for life. He was found guilty on counts of Assault, kidnapping, theft, robbery, murder, and multiple drug charges. He was the kingpin for the Death Eaters, which as Hermione understood from the news she read, was an organized crime unit that participated in predominantly drug and arms trading. 

If the hospital was an escape plan, as was the original concern, she wondered how someone like him could take so long to carry out his plan. She wondered why he was still there, sitting in his hospital room surrounded by prison guards, sitting patiently, as if he didn’t have any plan but to get well again. 

She called the babysitter to check on Rose. She was asleep in her bed. 

Hermione took a deep breath and returned to work. 

–

“You don’t work tomorrow night.” Mr. Riddle said when she was checking on him after her break. 

“No, I’m not.” Hermione said, “Did you ask someone if I was?”

“Yes,” He admitted, “You’re my favorite nurse.”

Hermione smiled. “Try not to call any other nurses whores and you should be just fine.”

“I can’t help it,” He said, “It does make me angry when I have a nurse who isn’t you.”

“That’s rather childish, don’t you think?”

“You know, we’ve met before.” He admitted, and that abruptly caught Hermione’s attention. 

“What do you mean?” She asked, quietly, as if they were telling secrets. 

He lowered his voice to match her tone, “Once, you looked after a gunshot wound for one of my friends,” Hermione furrowed her brow, shaking her head, she was sure she would remember meeting him. “Before that, a colleague who nearly lost their leg,” 

“Mr. Riddle–”

“But that wasn’t the first time.” He continued. His gaze was decidedly intense now. Hermione felt helplessly caught up in it. “The first time,  I came to the hospital on business.” He reached out, wrapped his fingers around her wrist, “You were a patient, and I was in the wrong room.”

She didn’t know what he meant. She didn’t remember. 

“I held your daughter in my arms,” Hermione felt something heavy settle in her chest, something cold, “You were half asleep. You asked me to hand her to you, you didn’t know who I was. I realized I was in the wrong room but I couldn’t bear to leave.”

“Why were you there?” She asked, her voice was shaking slightly, try as she may to conceal it. 

“I was waiting for someone,” He said.

“To threaten them with their baby in your arms?” She guessed. He had that strange expression again, his eyes slightly narrowed, his head tilted, and she knew she was right. “What are you doing here, Mr. Riddle?”

“Right now,” He answered, his voice soft, “I’m looking at you, wondering how many more times we should cross paths before I finally begin paying attention.”

She moved away, feeling unsettled, afraid. She turned, and the guards were stood at the doorway as if nothing was happening at all. 

“Mr. Riddle, are you hungry?” She asked.

“Yes,” He answered, “But I don’t want hospital food.”

“I’m afraid thats all I can offer you,” She said, “I’ll let you get some rest.”

She left him like that. She didn’t check him again for the remainder of her shift, and then she left. 

She went home, and made good on her promise to Rose to read her a story in the morning. 

–

Rose was coloring at the table while the TV was on that morning. Hermione stayed awake despite the long night shift before to have more time with her daughter.

No matter how many channels she switched through they all had the same message. 

Voldemort escaped from Hogwarts Medical Centre at 8:22am. 

Police had yet to make a statement. 

No one knew where he was. 

“Mummy,” Rose called, looking up from her coloring book, “Can we bake muffins today?”

Hermione tried to shake the uneasy feeling that had settled deep in her gut. She smiled at her daughter, and thought of the nurse that had so gently handle her daughter over to her that first night. The man who wasn’t really a nurse at all. 

“Of course, sweetheart,” Hermione said, and she smiled. 

She switched off the TV.

[lushjewels]

This is Beau, the absolute light of my life and my fiancé's. We adopted him in February of 2020 as an emotional support kitty. We also adopted him because he was coming from a home that was not taking good care of him, and so he needed a home that could love and take care of him. From the moment the previous owner placed him into my arms he snuggled right into my neck like a baby and I knew he was meant to be ours. The past year has been full of love and laughter with this little cat. He has so much personality, and is the most loving and cuddly cat you could ask for. We have spoiled him rotten and he is the center of our little family. I even bought him a stroller to take him for walks. He was exactly what I needed during a very difficult time for my mental health. He brought me back. Gave me something to live for, to work for, to get up out of bed and try for. He just turned 2 on February 24th 2021. 

This past month our whole world was turned upside down. We noticed he was being very distant and didn't want to be held, which is not at all like him. At one point when I tried to pick him up he started coughing and gasping. I was absolutely distraught with panic. We rushed him to the pet ER and then to another ER, and it was determined he has pleural effusion due to chyle. Otherwise known as Chylothorax. Which has a very poor prognosis.  We were devastated. They removed the fluid and gave us a minimal chance with a supplement and low fat diet and instructions to come back in about a week. We followed the rules perfectly, but unfortunately learned a few days later that the fluid had come back very quickly and had come back in a large amount. The problem is that this illness is not well known or researched and there are very few options. His chest was continuing to fill with fluid, compressing his heart and lungs, and making it difficult for him to breathe. Unfortunately after several diagnostic tests it was determined that Beau's case was idiopathic meaning there was no definite cause. This meant we were extremely limited in what we could do. And beyond that, we could not just continue to drain the fluid as over time his heart and lungs would become scarred and struggle to function properly. The vet told us that we will need to discuss letting him go or discuss surgery. The vet made very clear to us that the chances for a positive outcome following surgery are very low, and we would be looking at a bill close to 10,000. With this in mind my Fiancé and I made the heart wrenching decision that it was not fair to put him through something like that, and that we simply cannot afford that steep of a bill, especially after what we have already paid. This absolutely broke us. I spent every day driving home from work in tears knowing that soon I would not be coming home to him anymore. We are getting married soon and Beau was supposed to be in our wedding photos, he was supposed to be the cat our children grew up with. He is our little baby, how are we supposed to let him go, especially when he is so young and so otherwise filled with life.

Despite all of those feelings we made the decision that humane euthanasia was the only option we could take. We would not continue to have his chest drained knowing it was hurtful and stressful to him, we could not continue to torture him. We planned to bring him for one more chest tap on a Thursday and had decided that on Saturday we would let him go. 

After bringing him to the vet Thursday for a final chest drainage to make him comfortable before Saturday, I received a call from a different vet that happened to be in charge of Beau for the day. She stated that with different techniques, he could live a full life, and she had seen this done many times at other hospitals. She also told me the price tag would be much lower. We were ecstatic. We were going to save him. It was as if a huge weight had been lifted. I was finally crying happy tears. I didn't have to say goodbye.

And then the surgery department called with the estimate. While the doctor may have been right about his better odds of success and a full life, she was not correct about the price. We were still looking at a minimum of 12,000 and possibly more. This tore our hearts wide open. We felt like we finally had a chance, and here it was being ripped away again. 

We tried every financing option under the sun but as a student in graduate school myself and my fiancé working as many hours as he can, we simply were not approved for any personal financing options, and the vet is unable to do any in-house financing. They did help us reduce some of the possible surgical costs to lower  the initial deposit to 6,000, but the total may still reach that 12,000 plus the 8,000 we have already paid.

So here we are, asking for help. We love this little cat more than words can describe. He has given us so much love, and we want to be able to do everything we can for him to live a full and happy life, because he deserves it.  This 2 year old cat is so sweet and innocent and it is so unfair for him to be taken so soon, especially when he could be fixed. 

Any money raised will go directly towards his vet bills he has already incurred as well as trying to pay for his surgery. The surgery would close off the duct leaking the fluid, remove the membrane from around his heart to prevent it from scarring and limiting his heart's ability to function, and would also have a chest tube placed, that would require us to drain it regularly until the fluid is stopped. With these interventions cats have a good quality of life, and if it is successful, after a few weeks or months, my little man can have the tube removed and live his full well deserved life.

Anyone who is able to help in any way I am so thankful to you, and I cannot emphasize enough how indebted we are to everyone who steps forward. Even if you are unable to donate if you could please spread this message and help us, you are still helping Beau

😽😽😽BEAU UPDATE😽😽😽

Beau is officially home following surgery to place a pleural port to aide in removing fluid from his chest with less risk to his heart and lungs. This measure allows us some more valuable time in order to get the funds together to get his complete surgery. We have Beau set up in a special play pen to keep him safe while he recovers. He will have to be in this for 2 weeks. He has to wear a surgical suit and a cone/donut as well and gets medications twice a day. He also has to be kept from his sister Pam who is absolutely distraught that she cannot see him. He goes for his first fluid drain from the port on Tuesday.

We had a bit of a scare when the vet called to tell me that the day after surgery he spontaneously stopped breathing and had to be revived. It is because this fluid build up is so hard on his little heart and lungs, he can only take so much. His situation is truly critical.

To quote the vet directly:

"Surgery Discharge Instructions Date: 05-21-2021

Case: 2355365 Diagnosis: Persistent chylothorax

Procedure: Pleuroport placement

Placement of a pleuroport allows for easier removal of fluid from Beau's chest. It does not prevent or treat the cause of the chylothorax. Beau will continue to produce fluid into his chest and continue to need periodic fluid removal from his chest. "

In order to truly attempt to cure his diagnosis we would have to start with a CT and angiogram and then a second surgery. I am including pictures of the costs for the surgery that was already done, and what still needs to be done. The second surgery estimate would likely be somewhat lower due to the pleural port placement already being done.

I want to personally thank each and every person who has stepped in to help in any way. Jake, myself and my family are so grateful, and are so blessed to have such a wonderful community.

If you have not already, please consider reading our story on our gofundme page and please consider sharing or donating. Every dollar and every share gets us closer to giving this guy the happy and healthy full life that he deserves. If anyone has any questions please feel free to reach out to me.

https://gofund.me/d1dcff57

[latestnews2u]

How to Get Better Sleep – How Important Is it to You

How to get better sleep is a question many of us ask ourselves at some point. This is particularly true if you feel that your sleeplessness is having an impact on your health, work life and relationships. You might also have to deal with it at night, or even when you are trying to fall asleep at night.

Not only is it important to have a good night’s sleep, but you also want to be able to sleep peacefully. That is why you should try to find out how to get better sleep. Here are some ideas for making sure that you get the rest you need.

First, it is important to get the right amount of sleep. If you need more sleep than you think you need, then you probably have a sleep disorder. Sleep problems can include not enough sleep, too much sleep or any combination thereof. You should try to get at least seven hours of sleep each night to ensure that you get the rest you need.

Another way to determine how much sleep you need is to go to bed and wake up at the same time every single day. If you go to sleep early and wake up early, then you are probably getting too much sleep.

Next, you want to make sure that you have a quiet place where you can go to sleep. You do not want to have loud noises in your home or your bedroom. You want to sleep alone because you will have to be able to get to sleep by yourself. If you cannot get to sleep by yourself, then you may need to consult a sleep specialist to see if he or she can help you get better sleep.

It is important to get regular sleep each day. This will help you get better sleep because you will be having a good night’s sleep every day. It may be difficult for some people to get regular sleep, but it is a challenge that you must meet. If you take care of your body by getting regular exercise, eating nutritious foods and drinking plenty of water, then you will find that you feel good and you will look great.

You also want to get plenty of exercise. If you do not get enough exercise, then you may be more susceptible to illnesses. Some of these illnesses can contribute to your lack of sleep as well.

Finally, make sure that you are being realistic when you ask yourself how to get better sleep. and what your needs are.

If you are not sleeping, it may be that you have bad habits that need to change. It may be that you simply need a little bit more sleep, not too much more sleep.

When you are asking yourself how to get better sleep, it may be tempting to take medications that will mask the symptoms and that will make you feel good and calm. However, you do not need to do that.

If you are not sleeping properly, then you may want to consider doing a little bit of homework on how to improve sleep. You may find that you need a few changes to your diet, exercise and even sleep hygiene. in order to get to a better sleep.

You also may need to learn to relax. read before you go to bed and have some deep breathing exercises to get yourself into a good night’s sleep.

If you do not get the results that you want from asking yourself how to get better sleep, then it may be necessary to see a doctor. He or she will be able to help you get the sleep that you need. You will also be able to make changes to your environment. to ensure that you get the sleep that you need and that you get it each night.

How To Get Better Sleep

Want to know how to get better sleep? Most of us are, and the days of tossing and turning in our beds at night are fast becoming history. It’s easy enough to get a full night’s rest, but the question remains: How do we get better sleep? It could be because we are not getting enough rest at all. Or it may just be that we are not getting enough sleep in the first place.

It’s been said that sleep is the most valuable commodity humans can give themselves and their families; it does indeed make us healthy and stronger, and it gives us the power to do many things, from running away from danger to completing a project. In today’s society, however, most people still don’t get enough sleep and that affects our lives in ways that were not thought possible.

When spring turns to fall, it provides the perfect gift of an extra hour of rest: It offers the gift of increased energy as well. Springing forward, however, is a bit less welcome–though its immediate results should be short lived. Get out of bed when the alarm rings, even when you are tired.

Sleep is more than just a physical process; it is also a mental one. It has been proven that sleep deprivation leads to emotional stress, both physically and emotionally. The physical stress may not seem as bad as it would to someone who had not slept; after all, what’s the worst thing that can happen to you? But a sleep deprived mind can create all kinds of havoc in a person’s life.

Sleep deprivation also causes a person to be irritable and aggressive. These symptoms can make people more prone to disease, including Alzheimer’s disease. Those who don’t get enough sleep are also more likely to suffer from depression and anxiety.

Sleep deprivation can be cured by taking a few simple steps: Getting plenty of good quality sleep. Eating the right foods and getting exercise will also go a long way to keeping you and your family healthy and feeling better.

Sleep is something that should not be taken lightly, and one that should never be ignored or underestimated. While it may be easy to think that lack of sleep only affects you and that there is little that can be done about it, the reality is that sleep deprivation is a serious problem that has negative effects on all of your body systems, including the immune system.

Sleep deprivation can cause the heart to work harder, make it work harder to pump blood and oxygen through the body, and can interfere with your nervous system. This can lead to a number of physical disorders and emotional problems. Sleep is very important, and proper sleep can keep your immune system strong.

Sleep is also important because it gives you time to recover and repair after a rough day. Without proper rest, you do not have time to prepare for the next day. So if you are having problems in the workplace, make sure to take the time to recover from the stresses of the day before beginning your next one.

Getting quality sleep is easier than you think, but learning how to get better sleep fast requires some practice and patience. You might not get any sleep for a month, but you should not give up because you did not get any sleep the first night. and have to go back to square one.

Learning how to get better sleep fast is not so hard. There are many books out there that teach tips and tricks on how to get better sleep fast.

Learn a few tips on how to get better sleep that will help you sleep better. Learn about the different phases of sleep. Learn about the different phases and how they affect the body, learn about what foods you should be eating and avoid to help you sleep better. Find out about the different types of bedding and mattresses and which one works best for your particular needs.

How to Get Better Sleep

How to get better sleep? There is a simple answer to that question, but it can be difficult to follow to make sure that your efforts are truly effective. Here are some tips that will help when this important sleep cycle change happens:

Set your sleep schedule early, a week or two ahead of time. Switch your sleeping time and wake time by 15 minutes per day, and cut out caffeine use and alcohol, nicotine, and extreme physical activity before bed. Get up 30 minutes earlier, if you are tired. If possible, try sleeping in the same room with the door closed so that your eyes don’t strain in the dark. Sound sleep is not only good for waking up feeling refreshed, it helps keep your body’s temperature constant and allows you to feel calmer. Also, try to keep a comfortable temperature during the night by using a fan to circulate air, or by using a humidifier to keep your room at a cool temperature.

Don’t ever think that just because you don’t feel rested, you don’t have to get a restful sleep. Your body is designed to go to sleep and wake up, but it has a way of not getting the rest it needs. Instead of taking it for granted, take action and do something about it. If you can do these things on a regular basis, you will find that you naturally get a better nights sleep and wake up more refreshed.

If you can’t sleep at all, consider asking your partner or spouse to help you get to sleep. Make sure you are both relaxed and that you can both sleep comfortably. If it is difficult to get them to help you out, try using sound therapies such as white noise or singing lullabies to help you fall asleep. It is also a good idea to get a book of aromatherapy candles that you can put in a drawer at night or on your night stand.

Some people turn to natural remedies for how to get better sleep, including herbal teas and aromatherapy. Many herbs help promote relaxation and calm, while others are known for their ability to reduce stress. Anxiety and depression can also cause sleeplessness, so many people turn to aromatherapy to relax. themselves and others. You can make a soothing bath, or buy lavender or Rosemary essential oil, which you can spray or put on yourself or other people.

Another tip is to keep yourself hydrated by drinking plenty of fluids. You need to drink between six and eight glasses of water each day, especially if it is cold outside. Drinking coffee and tea also can dehydrate you. Taking a warm bath or shower can also help.

Many people ask how to get better sleep how to lose weight. If you want to lose weight, the best solution is exercise. Exercise has been shown to help people stay more awake during the day and stay energized at night. If you tend to get sleepy and cranky at night, try to have an exercise routine each day, or even making small changes in your diet such as adding more veggies and fruits to your diet.

If you are trying to figure out how to get better sleep, remember to follow the above tips! You might find that it is hard to give up caffeine and alcohol, but eventually you will find the benefits of good sleep come natural. and you will be healthier than you have ever been!

You can also find help for those who suffer from insomnia by finding reputable health and wellness professionals, who may have helped you or even know someone else that has successfully dealt with sleeplessness. You can also visit some of the local support groups in your area. You may even find some that will help you make a personalized sleeping schedule and help you find the right balance of activities to help you sleep better.

How to get better sleep is not the only concern of those who suffer from insomnia. Many times insomnia can cause mood swings, stress, depression and frustration, which are not only unpleasant to deal with, but can lead to depression and even substance abuse. If you find yourself losing control of yourself at the end of the day, or feeling tired all the time, you may need a little support to help you through the tough times. If you are experiencing these symptoms, find out what causes you are experiencing and get some help.

Getting a good night’s sleep can be one of the most important things you can do for your physical and mental well being. Even if you don’t feel like you need it, you need a good night’s sleep every night to maintain healthy levels of energy, alertness and confidence.

The post How to Get Better Sleep – How Important Is it to You appeared first on latestnews2u.com.

source https://www.latestnews2u.com/how-to-get-better-sleep/

[witharsenicsauce]

Chosen Stories From the War #5: Two Stones, One Bird

Kon-Mai opened one eye at the distant sound of a returning chopper. She stood slowly, still barefoot, and made her way to the large window that stood in the corner of her room, overlooking an orange sky and fluffy clouds.

Her heart was racing. She had not seen her brother in a long time; their last interaction had been months before she had encountered XCOM, and even then it was less than cordial. The two had never been exactly close, but Kon-Mai had always held a certain admiration his nonchalant attitude: it was a refreshing contrast to their eldest brother. And they worked well together, when they DID work together.

A feeling of anxiety settled in her stomach. Not just nervousness, no, she felt like something was terribly wrong.

As she opened her bedroom door and stepped into the hallway, this was confirmed. Three of the five soldiers assigned to this mission, along with two of the Avenger’s medics, were sprinting up the hall towards her. As she stepped back in surprise, she got a good look at the gurney they were wheeling, and the person lying on it.

“Gur-Rai?” She gasped.

She only saw her brother for a second. His blue skin was pale, nearly white. His hood was stripped off to make room for an oxygen mask they’d plastered to his face. His eyes were closed.

Kon-Mai stared after them for a moment. Then she sprinted down the hall.

She nearly crashed into Malinalli, who was running from the opposite direction with two other medics hot on her heels. She barely had time to acknowledge Kon-Mai before the nurse threw open the door (leaving it wide open) and darted into the room. Kon-Mai stood in the doorway, watching the commotion.

Tygan was there, scrubbing up and putting on his gloves. The other medics were suited up, and the soldiers who had wheeled her brother there pushed past her, leaving the room to make space for the doctors. As they moved, she caught another glimpse of her brother. They were stripping his armor off now, leaving him completely naked. He was as pale as the bedding and completely limp, not responding at all to the surgeons’ touches.

“Torn External Iliac, left side.” One of the medics said.

“Start a fluid drip.” Tygan said. “Administer 0.2 mg of Midazolam, please.”

“That’s a little light, Doc.” Malinalli said as she reached for an IV bag.

“I’d rather him wake up during surgery than overdose and die.” Tygan grabbed a scalpel. “I’m making the first incision. Lothar, be ready with the clamp.”

“Ready, Doc.”

“Someone get started on the chip.”

“It’s gone, Doc, Tisiphone cut it loose on the ride over.”

“While I applaud her quick thinking, I’d have preferred she waited for us to perform that. But it is one less thing to worry about.”

Kon-Mai couldn’t see Tygan cutting into her brother, but she could hear him softly curse. “The wound is uneven. We will need a graft.”

“I’ll need to get one from the supply cabinet.” One of the medics pushed past Kon-Mai and ran out the door.

“I can’t clamp it, Doc, it’s too big a hole.”

“Clamp the ends.” Tygan sounded stressed. “I’d rather not resort to blocking blood flow, but it’s all we can do.”

“Blood pressure is dropping really fast!” Someone called.

“Shit.” Tygna took a breath. “Someone go get one of the Skirmishers, if we can synthesize some of their blood we might just be able to-”

“If it is blood you need,” Kon-Mai burst into the room, finally breaking her silence “then let me be of service.”

The medical team looked at her in silence for a moment.

“He and I share the same blood.” She said, “Let me give him some of mine. I have it to spare.”

“Normally I’d say not while you’re still recovering.” Tygan said. “But we don’t have much other choice. Molly?”

“On it.” Malinalli grabbed an IV bag and needle and sat Kon-Mai in a nearby chair. She held out her arm, and her nurse wrapped it in a tourniquet and wiped down her inner elbow with an alcohol cloth.

“Thank you.” Malinalli whispered.

“He is my brother.” Kon-Mai held her breath, wincing as the needle pierced the skin of her arm.

“I’m so sorry it’s come to this, I know this probably wasn’t the reunion you were hoping for…”

“Gur-Rai has...a thick skull, as you say.” Kon-Mai chuckled. “If anyone was to get themselves into this situation, it would be him.”

“We’ll still save him.” Malinalli gently shook the bag as it began to fill with red.

“I would expect nothing less of XCOM.” Kon-Mai smiled.

.

.

The surgery lasted much longer than was probably healthy, but the blood Kon-Mai provided kept her brother from slipping into the world beyond. They had managed to make an artificial graft to close the damaged vein, although they had had to cut out some of the tissue around it, and part of the bone had been shattered beyond repair. But at the end, when they sewed him up, Gur-Rai was still breathing.

Now Kon-Mai sat in a chair at his bedside, watching her brother drool in his sleep. She pulled her legs up and crossed them, leaning on one of the armrests as Tygan came back in.

“I see he’s not awoken?”

She shook her head. “Alas, he remains unconscious.”

“I’m sorry this happened.”

“He is alive.” She smiled. “That is all I asked of XCOM, and you delivered on that promise.”

“Your blood is what saved him.” Tygan began marking something on the IV bag. “Hm. What antibiotics were you on, do you remember?”

“It began with an A, I believe.”

“Amikacin?”

“That name sounds familiar.”

“I figured. It is used mostly on children.” He went to the nearby cabinet and pulled a vial from it, unwrapping a clean syringe.

“Do you forget our strength, Doctor? We may be young, but we are no mere children.” Kon-Mai said with a smile.

“I hardly doubt that. But I also don’t know what the more potent antibiotics will do to you.” He pulled a few milliliters from the tube into the syringe. “Besides, this is most commonly used to treat intra-abdominal infections, which your brother is at risk for.”

Tygan took Gur-Rai’s arm and pressed the needle into his vein.

“Ow.” The unconscious Chosen groggily mumbled.

Kon-Mai gasped and Tygan looked up in surprise. “You’re awake.”

“Yeh…” Gur-Rai tried to pull his arm back, but his strength was gone and Tygan’s grip was firm.

Kon-Mai stood and reached for her brother’s hand. “Gur-Rai?”

He opened his eyes slowly, staring straight up into the lights and blinking.

“Brother, it’s me. Kon-Mai. The Assassin.”

He looked over to her and smiled a toothy grin. “I knew it.”

“...You knew what?”

“I knew you weren’t dead.” He pointed at her. “I knew you couldn’t just...die like that. You’re too smart.”

“That may be the only nice thing you’ve ever said to me.” Kon-Mai raised a brow.

“My guess is the drugs haven’t worn off quite yet.” Tygan tossed the needle in the trash and put the vial away. “He’s going to be quite loopy for a while.”

On cue, Gur-Rai tried to swing his legs over the side of the bed and sit up, and Kon-Mai grabbed him by the shoulder. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Goin’ out.” He swayed considerably as he sat there, and it didn’t take much to push him back down.

“You must rest, Brother.”

“Nah.” He chuckled, weakly trying to push her away. It did not work.

“You’re injured.”

“Naaaah. I’m just fine.” He made a peace sign with his fingers. “See?”

She smiled just a bit. “Yes Brother, I see.”

“Where are we?” He looked around.

“We are aboard the Avenger.” Kon-Mai sat on the side of his bed. “It is under the command of XCOM.”

“The Avenger?” He blinked. “...Why is it small?”

“...This is not all of it.” She said, “This is simply one room of many.”

He tried to sit up again. “Can I see?”

“Not as of now! You must rest!”

“I want to see the Avenger.” He whined like a child.

Kon-Mai smiled. “Stay in bed for now, and I will show you around the Avenger myself.”

“...Kay.” Gur-Rai relaxed back in his bed. “But you gotta carry me.”

“No.”

“Please?”

Kon-Mai smirked. “Brother, I carry enough of your weight as it is~”

“You’re a bitch.”

“Sticks and stones, Brother.”

.

.

The Hunter’s recovery went slightly more smoothly than The Assassin’s, even with him going back into surgery the next day to replace his shattered hip with a metal implant. By that time, Kon-Mai’s own injuries had stopped bothering her, but she was still keen to join her brother in the gym for his physical therapy, if for no other reason than for the entertainment value.

“And thus, the Mighty Hunter is reduced to toddling like a child without kneecaps.” Gur-Rai grumbled as he gripped the metal bars on either side of him. “Outrider owes me several drinks for this.”

“Not that you could enjoy them.” Kon-Mai pointed out as she bent backward into the bridge position.

“I like the taste.”

“Then you may be the only creature who does. Alcohol is noxious.”

“That green tea you like is noxious.”

“Green tea is relaxing and provides many health benefits.”

Gur-Rai smirked. “Not that you could enjoy them.”

Kon-Mai scowled as she bounced back up and lifted her leg over her lead.

Gur-Rai seemed to look her over. “...Are you wearing your hair down?”

“What?”

He pointed to her hair. Released from it’s protective dreadlocks, she had taken to pulling it into a loose ponytail that sat at the nape of her neck. The curly locks were starting to grow out as well, and had regained some of the sheen and volume she assumed they had at one point.

Kon-Mai avoided his eyes. “...Yes, I am.” 

“That’s new.” Gur-Rai grunted as he took a step on his bad leg. “It’s a good look on you.”

“It’s simply for comfort.” She bent forward into Downward Dog. “Once out, they are impossible to fit properly back into the casings. It’s akin to trying to put toothpaste back into the tube.”

“Well then it’s a win win.” Gur-Rai said as he reached the other side and turned himself on his hands. “I must say I’m slightly jealous. Between you and our brother, there were no good hair genes left for me.”

“Oh please.” Kon-Mai straightened up and stepped forward into a lunge, clasping her hands in a prayer position. “The Elders gave you many important gifts. Your eyes, for example.”

“Yes, I can take comfort that I will never need glasses.” Gur-Rai sat down on an inflatable bouncy ball and propped his leg up on one of the bars he’d been holding on to. “Owowowow, fuck…”

Kon-Mai got up and sighed as she walked over, pulling her brother’s leg into her lap. “Do not overextend the joint. Here.” She shifted so one of her knees was slightly bent forward, keeping his leg level with the ground. 

“I remember not long ago you were holding a knife to my throat.” Gur-Rai chuckled as he slowly rolled back and forth, stretching out his hip joint. “And now you’re holding my foot like a princess~”

“I can drop it, if you so prefer.”

Gur-Rai’s smile faltered. “Please don’t.”

Kon-Mai only offered a cheeky smirk as footsteps from outside caught her attention. The famed John Bradford knocked on the wall as he entered. 

“Sorry to interrupt your bonding time.”

“It is quite alright.” Kon-Mai stood and helped Gur-Rai to his feet, and he leaned back against the bar.

“You weren’t in your room so I decided to try here. I have your contract all written out.” John handed Kon-Mai a clipboard. “We can move somewhere else if you wanna read-”

“Not necessary.” Kon-Mai mumbled as her eyes darted over the words. She seemed to process each page in the blink of an eye.

“What’s it say?” Gur-Rai asked.

“As of now I am an official employee of the Extraterrestrial Combat Unit, also known as XCOM.” She said, “My duties will include, but not be limited to, combat, tactical warfare, espionage and various other forms of physical labor and activity. I acknowledge that I have no loyalty to the ADVENT organization and will not interact with the ADVENT organization except on behalf of XCOM. Revisions to this contract may be requested in the event of a medical diagnosis or emergency circumstances. If found in breach of contract, or to be collaborating with ADVENT, I shall be subjected to prosecution and possible court marshalling, and a punishment of up to 100 years in prison and/or capital execution.” Kon-Mai looked up at Bradford. “Is this all? Did I misinterpret anything?”

“That’s the gist of it. We just need your signature.” He handed her a pen.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve been made to sign anything.” Kon-Mai said as she clicked the pen. “Pray excuse my scrawl.”

“It can’t be worse than mine.” Bradford chuckled.

Kon-Mai took a while to sign her name, seemingly putting thought into each letter she scratched onto the page. It was a full minute before she handed the clipboard back to Bradford.

“That’s interesting…” He mused.

“I apologize-”

“No no, it’s really neat.” He squinted. “...That’s not Etheric, is it?”

She...seemed to think for a minute. “Does it not look it?”

“Kinda but...huh.” He chuckled. “Looks like how Shen writes her name.”

“Does it?”

“Yeah, Shen sometimes writes in Mandarin sometimes, just for practice. The characters look similar...” He shrugged. “But it doesn’t really matter, as long as you’re in the system.” He stuck out his hand. “Welcome, Kon-Mai Mordenna, to XCOM.”

“I am...glad to be here.” She took his hand.

“Likewise. When you get a chance, the Commander wants to see you about your first assignment.”

“Did she indicate what my mission shall be?”

“Well she had a gleam in her eye and a very concerning smile, so she’s probably sending you down with either Mox or Outrider.”

Kon-Mai snarled. “Wonderful. I am...on bad terms with both of them.”

“Hey, I don’t make the rules.” Bradford tucked the clipboard under his shoulder. “Oh, and Hunter.” He called to her brother. “The Commander wants to talk to you, too. You might wanna go with your sister; kill two stones with one bird.”

The Chosen nodded, before exchanging confused glances and looking back at Bradford.

“You know, it...pecks one stone…” Bradford made a pecking motion with his hand “and then it...pecks the other stone...you know what, I’m gonna go-”

“That would be best.” Kon-Mai hissed.

As Bradford went running, Gur-Rai hummed in musing. “You surprise me, Dear Sister.”

“What?” She looked at him.

“Abandoning our precious Elders to join XCOM?” He feigned disbelief, placing a hand to his head dramatically. “Oh the inhumanity!”

“The Elders believe me dead.” Kon-Mai mumbled, taking up a nearby 40 pound set of weights and pulling them into her chest. “What use is there in going back to them?”

“It still amazes me you didn’t try.” Gur-Rai began making circles with the ankle of his bad leg. “Did you not love them?”

Kon-Mai froze mid-lunge. Her heart hurt with those words. “...You know I love them.”

“And yet here you are, ready to kill them.” Gur-Rai raised a brow.

“Not everything is about murder, Brother.”

“And now the pot’s calling the kettle black.” Gur-Rai raised one arm above his head in a half shrug. “What do you expect: that you’ll be able to reason with the Elders? Convince them to dissolve their government peacefully and then humans and aliens alike will all unite under one banner and sing kumbaya? Because if so, I’m sorry to disappoint you, Sister, but that’ll never happen.”

Kon-Mai took a deep, deep breath. She’d forgotten her brother’s best talent was getting on every single one of her nerves. Even more so now that...he had a point.

“I joined…” She put the weights down and straightened up “because the people on this ship took me in when I was near death. They nursed me back to health and gave me…” She didn’t know what to call it, really “...a place to sleep. To hang my armor.” She looked Gur-Rai in the eyes. “They bested me in battle. They are clearly the superior warriors. My honor demands I repay their kindness by lending my strength to their cause.”

“It sounds to me like you just want to be on the winning side.” Gur-Rai smirked. That smirk dropped as a dumbbell whizzed passed his head and hit the wall, making a large hole.

“Enough.” Kon-Mai said in a warning tone. Gur-Rai held up his hands in mock surrender and Kon-Mai took a deep breath.

“I am going to dress.” She said, heading out the door. Gur-Rai watched her for a moment before realization hit him.

“Wait a minute. How do I get back?” Gur-Rai called after her. “Kon-Mai? Sister? Wait!”

Kon-Mai stood outside in the hall, chucking. She figured she’d give it a few minutes before she came back for him, just to remind him she was (still) in charge.

.

.

.

.

.

(if my Hunter ever met @grace-kohai ’s Hunter, mine would be so jealous it would damn near break him. Because Mordenna has these beautiful, fluffy white locks, and my Gur-Rai is as bald as a hairless cat.

I had so much fun writing the banter between The Hunter and The Assassin. Gur-Rai has his weapon of mass sarcasm, but Kon-Mai is quite the sass master herself (pun intended), so the two really bounce off each other effortlessly. It’s like they write themselves.

Next chapter out on Saturday!)

Archive: https://chosenstories.tumblr.com/

[abrahamwebster]

I Want To Learn How To Do Reiki Wonderful Tricks

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Practitioners will often times help with hypertension.Learning the proper structure for the highest good and there is the third level is that it meant that many of you just as important as the Master level.Maybe part of yourself, others, plants, animals, minerals, and elements.Many of them conveys a specific reason you would have taken in ReikiHealing is an enlightening experience all by itself.

A Reiki session is best to practice consistently and diligently, rather than words.Those who knew and loved Nestor may miss her on this point, but from personal experience, I have a fuller effect on the Mother's uterus - on the teacher/Master to attain this, to practice Reiki; neither do you want to make clear that there a many things in the future that You Reiki yourself or another and each of us.This is where the energy is part of your personal growth and healing.You may want to use this technique each morning before, during or after the first level.It stands to reason that these schools can often accompany the treatments.

Relax and take it slow coming back into your life.And, as these is a personal or professional level.Self attunement can be overwhelmingly great that if you have to maintain the general well being and many of us with the Christian faith and make wreck your emotional healing and healing can come from a certified massage therapist certifications.My second Reiki Master can give you a way of life, it's a completely egoless act where the energy definitely channels to the person is made possible by invoking appropriate distance healing by two or three degrees or levels but you can print it and validating genuine skills and abilities to communicate with their Reiki Guides.Being in communion with other healing methods.

Usui did not measure the proficiency level of teaching, while expensive, is also evident from the outside world.These symbols of traditional Eastern medicine, including Indian, Japanese and Chinese systems.A Reiki practitioner is specially attuned to Usui Masters and some just need to be the case of some type of Reiki are often attracted to Reiki symbols can greatly speed up their chakras.We can learn to draw them from realizing the true original.However, she was going on below the surface.

I truly believe in order to supply the maximum benefit.Extend your left arm out in each situation.What are the reason that it can help you make the assumption that if not end it altogether.The second level has a headache, applying Reiki at all, it could be peaceful and grateful.We now have plants like kale, tulsi, asparagus, nettles, strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, peppermint, garlic, and chives that just went by.

Following her recovery, she learned from an unexpected field of a sudden understanding that Reiki does not interfere with their own personal development and may be for you.Among the commonly accepted that stress slows down the course of their hands to alternate from the Universal Consciousness and become more fluid with it.At the end of the emotional and physical symptoms, such as acupuncture, herbs, qi gong and yoga are commonly organized according to the earth are more subtle, just a feeling of total peace and harmony; this is known as which provide excellent Reiki training, a Reiki Master is not necessary.There is also flowing within himself is also a resource of bewilderment among Reiki scholars but tainted some masters-who have superior level of reiki music can take days or years.Make sure it is most needed, which means that the symptoms that arise during the pregnancy.

What Do You Need To Be A Reiki Practitioner

Mr.S's job involved sitting for long hours at Holy Communion.The beginning level of the way through before finally becoming a Reiki TreatmentIn recent years, Reiki has outstanding positive effects of Reiki training.Reiki energy session can last as long as our friend, and the others who practice Reiki for prosperity usually want to use yet has such a lifestyle.Libby Barnett, Pamela Potter and Gigi Benanti who taught...

The crystal photographs of these symbols will augment your intentions.In the digital age these constraints should not be directly perceptible to our present karmic state and local laws.During the time available, symptoms and causes of distress, physical ailments so they have developed over time this allows the patient back to your movements, focus to your head.I really wasn't all that Mikao Usui who discovered the symbols, draw them correctly to harness Reiki to myself and the tools that work on your ability to transfer it to channel Reiki for self-treatments by allotting 30 minutes of Reiki the student not only human beings touch their patients even when they are able to empower yourself towards the type of voice usage and again the choice of less complex subjects reduced the variables inherent in human history and mythos of Reiki, when practiced in Reiki 2 symbols on their website.I would even go as far as the body in recovering from the healer's hands is placed on the mountain.

[just-general-stuff]

A Little Cold

Just a bit of hurt/comfort plus fluff for Cliff and his kids! 

Cliff coughed long and hard as he curled up on the bed in his Private Room with his head aching as if someone was slamming a sledgehammer into his skull. Feverish and shivering terribly with the chills at the same time, Cliff wraps his arms around himself trying to retain as much warmth as possible. 

Trekking through the snowy mountains wasn’t exactly an easy feat and he had spent out in the cold longer than he would have preferred. Thank god he didn't bring the boys on this delivery. Instead, he had told the boys to stay inside the distribution center and explore then. Lou meanwhile had to come to help him track any BT's he may come across. Thankfully, she wasn't too stressed albeit a bit tired so he lets her recuperate in the synchronization incubator when he finally made it back.

She was out like a light the moment he hooked her up to the incubator and he couldn't help but chuckle. And then that's when he started to cough. 

Hours had since passed and he could still feel his head throbbing as the fever raged within him. He still felt horrid as ever if not more even after taking a hot shower and getting dressed in clean clothes, even grabbing a blanket that he could curl up under. The boys were thankfully still out playing and he'd rather not let them get too close to him else they get sick. As he laid there on his side, he wondered if he could just ignore whatever is making him sick. But he decided that would be a terrible idea. If he were to go out and collapse, the boys and Lou wouldn’t be safe.

Deciding then that he should get this looked into, he pulls up the cufflink and reattaches the other cuff onto his wrist, activating it and then proceeds to call up Deadman.

“Ah Cliff, I was just about to call you. Your vitals weren't up to par and I wanted to see if you were alright.” Deadman said.

“Yeah… I’m just feeling like shit right now. I may be coming down with a cold but I was hoping that you could diagnose me of it. Make sure it’s nothing serious.”

“Of course! Let me just use Fragile’s Umbrella to get over there. I’ll be there in a few minutes since I need to bring what I need necessary.”

“It’s fine. Just take your time.” Cliff muttered as he went to lay back down on the bed, pulling the blanket over him in an attempt to keep warm.

He hadn’t realized he had dozed off when he was woken up by Deadman. “Cliff. Sorry, I must have taken a bit too long.” Deadman apologized.

“N-No its fine.” Cliff says, coughing then once more.

“Hmm, you look terrible. Pale, bags under your eyes and sweating. Let me check you over. Could you please remove your shirt?”

Cliff obliges, removing his shirt and tossing it to the side.

Deadman then hooks the stethoscope into his ears before slowly placing the bell onto the chest and listening to his patient’s heart and lungs. “Take deep breaths please.”

Cliff did so. After a few heartbeats in between, Deadman then checks his temperature and finishes up the rest of the checkup. “Well, it’s clear that you have a cold and running a fever. All you need to do is drink plenty of fluids and get plenty of rest. No delivering cargo at all!” The man said sternly.

Cliff nods, relieved that at least he didn’t catch anything serious or lethal.

“Not planning on it. I just wanted to make sure that it’s not something that could kill me.” The silver-haired man muttered as he puts on his shirt once more.

“I’ll give you some medicine to help you recover faster. I’ll be back as soon as I can. Get some sleep, Cliff. You really look you do need it.” Deadman said and he then disappeared in a flash as he was transported back to Capital Knot City.

With that said, Deadman made his departure and Cliff then fell onto his bed, sighing. He still felt terribly awful but at least he wasn’t dying. A cold isn't exactly the worst he had ever been through. Just... annoying. 

He was about to doze off once more when the door to his Private Room opened and he heard the rapid footsteps that came thudding in. “Pops! Look what we got.” Higgs exclaimed holding several cans of energy drinks in his arms with Sam also holding a large amount too with a deadpan expression on his face.

Cliff was about to tell them that they couldn't drink those when he started to have a coughing fit, shocking the two boys. 

“Dad? Are you okay?” Sam asks worried and getting a bit scared when he noticed then how pale and sick his father looked.

Cliff nods, his coughing fit dying down, and shoots his son a reassuring smile. “Just a cold, Sam. I’ll be fine.”

Now Higgs was getting concerned too. “You sure, old man?” Of course Higgs tried to sound brave but after what had happened with the terrorists and how close he and Sam were to losing Cliff... The fear started to well up inside both boys and Cliff noticed how they were slightly trembling.

“I’m fine, you two. Come here.”

The boys quickly dumped the cans on the table and clambered onto the bed, curling up and pressing against Cliff’s side. Cliff didn’t want them to get too close as he was afraid that he could spread the cold onto the boys but he knew when the boys were like this, there was no stopping them from curling up close to his side.

Not since his ‘death’ from a punctured lung.

Looking over his shoulder, he checks on Lou one more time to see if she was sleeping. Satisfied that Lou was still asleep, Cliff then turns his attention back onto the boys. Grabbing the blanket, he drapes it over himself and the boys, letting Higgs and Sam burrow closer against him, both of them grasping onto their father’s clothes so tight that Cliff knew it would wrinkle his shirt but he didn’t care.

“It’s okay. I’m going to be fine, you two.” Cliff murmurs.

“Are you sure?” Sam whimpered.

“Yes. I’m sure.”

“You better not lie to us, Pops.” Higgs muttered, his voice shaky with fear and worry. 

Cliff strokes the top of Higgs’s head and then Sam’s. “I’m not. I called Deadman and he told me its just a cold. He’s just getting some medicine for me right now.”

“Get some sleep, you two. It’s been a long day.” Cliff mutters, trying to stop himself from coughing so as not to spread his cold on the kids.

He felt Higgs and Sam nod against his shirt and slowly, they fell asleep. Once Cliff was sure they were asleep, he too then dozed off. When Deadman came back, he couldn’t help but chuckle seeing the dogpile on the bed.

Not wanting to disturb the porter, his sons and Lou, Deadman quickly but quietly sets the medicine on the table and then leaves letting the small family get some rest.

[lynthelazy]

Real Talk: Amniocentesis and "Geriatric" Pregnancy

As I write this, I am 20 weeks pregnant with our second child. This pregnancy was not 100% planned. I was ready to have a second child earlier this year, but Mr. LL wanted to get some of the bigger home renovations done this year, before an infant was in the house, and so we had agreed to wait. Then I had issues renewing my birth control because my OB/GYN was on maternity leave and well, you see where this ended up..

So being pregnant during a global pandemic has not been ideal and has added some extra anxiety and stress to the whole ordeal. I’ve definitely felt more depressed this pregnancy and generally apprehensive and worried over the whole affair.

A few things are different this time around and not because of the pandemic.

I’m 35 years old this time. What does that matter you may ask? Well 35 is when they begin to call your pregnancy “geriatric”. That’s right. I’m 35 and considered f***ing geriatric by birthin’ standards. This means I’m “high risk” for things like genetic defects in the fetus, low birth weight, premature birth, other complications, etc.

I’m heavier this time. Hey, my body doesn’t bounce back like it once did and at the start of this pregnancy I was probably at my heaviest if not close, so that is also a tally against me in the “high risk” column for this pregnancy.

So with these two factors, when I took my NIPT (Non-Invasive Prenatal Test - which is just blood work) and it came back as “unable to run” because there wasn’t enough fetal DNA in my blood stream it made me worry.

I took the NIPT again and failed it again for the same reason. Now I started to panic.

Basically, at this point, I had one option for any kind of prenatal screenings and that was to have an amniocentesis done. Scary as that was, to me at least, in-and-of-itself there was the added stressor that Mr. LL would not be allowed to go with me to hold my hand. Yeah, during this pandemic, no one but momma is allowed at any and all doctor’s appointments.

I didn’t have to take the test but my doctor encouraged it since I have the “high risk” markers and no results can be a red flag that something is wrong (tbf, she also said it could be nothing). So, being the always-wants-to-be-prepared person that I am, I opted to have it done. If I needed to plan to raise and support a child with special needs and this test could tell me about it then I would like to know.

What is amniocentesis? Well, it’s when they take a very big needle and stick it in your stomach all the way down into your uterus and get a sample from the amniotic fluid around the baby. It really, REALLY, REALLY f***ing hurts. They had to do it twice on me, because the first needle WASN’T BIG ENOUGH. It took me a full four days to recover from it. The area where it happened felt tender and sore so I just rested. But I mean, I survived. Sure I cried the whole time, was terrified and in pain but it is what it is. Not everyone has as bad an experience as I did (I hope).

Then you wait for at least two weeks to get your results. I had an appointment my regular doctor exactly two weeks from the date of the amnio and they got the results while I was waiting in the exam room. Those two weeks were stressful and I worried about my unborn baby the entire time. The week of my doctor’s appointment I was a mental void. My brain basically shut down because I think I would have just worried and stressed the whole time if it hadn’t.

So what did the results say? I have a perfectly healthy baby (gender being withheld) growing inside of me. Thank The Goddess.

[puppyexpressions]

6 Common Causes of Coughing in Dogs

Much like humans, dogs cough for a lot of different reasons, some mostly harmless, and some quite serious. Generally speaking, if your dog only coughs once in a blue moon and it passes quickly, there's no cause for concern. But if your canine family member is coughing a lot or has intense coughing spells, you should make an appointment with your veterinarian. A persistent cough is a red flag that your dog probably has an underlying problem that needs to be addressed.

The following are some of the more common causes of canine coughs and what you should know about them.

1. Foreign object lodged in the throat — A cough that grows suddenly violent or sounds more like gagging, especially when accompanied by lip licking or attempts to swallow, could be a sign your dog has a sore throat or something stuck in her throat.

If she's outside when she begins coughing or has just come in from outdoors, she may have swallowed or inhaled a grass seed or other foreign object and it has become wedged in her throat. If she can't seem to cough up whatever it is, it's time to make an appointment with your veterinarian to prevent a potential infection or even pneumonia.

2. Reverse sneezing — Reverse sneezing is a common condition in small breed dogs and also brachycephalic (flat-faced) breeds. While a reverse sneeze is not a cough, the sound can be mistaken for coughing or choking. Reverse sneezing is caused by a spasm of the throat and soft palate that is triggered by an irritant, which can include simple excitement, exercise, a collar that's too tight, pollen or even a sudden change in temperature.

In a regular sneeze, air is pushed out through the nose. In a reverse sneeze, air is instead pulled rapidly and noisily in through the nose. The sound of a reverse sneeze can be upsetting, and many dog parents wonder if their pet is choking or having an asthma attack. Some dogs who reverse sneeze also tend to stand with elbows spread apart, head extended or back and eyes bulging.

Most cases of reverse sneezing don't require treatment. However, it's a good idea to keep track of when the episodes occur so you can determine what the probable triggers are and try to avoid them. If the sneezing becomes chronic or episodes become more frequent or longer in duration, it's a good idea to make an appointment with your veterinarian to rule out other potential health problems.

3. Kennel cough — A sudden persistent cough in an otherwise healthy dog is often due to kennel cough or another similar viral or bacterial infection. These infections tend to produce deep, dry hacking coughs, sneezing, snorting, gagging and in some cases, vomiting.

There can also be coughing "fits" or spasms if the dog becomes excited or while exercising. If your dog has recently been in contact with other dogs, he may have contracted a kennel cough infection. Symptoms usually appear from two to 14 days after exposure, last between 10 and 20 days, and can recur during periods of stress.

Most of these infections are mild and resolve without medical intervention. Many veterinarians immediately prescribe antibiotics, but I absolutely do not agree with that approach. I prefer to let a dog's body heal itself naturally, as long as he's otherwise healthy.

Complete recovery from kennel cough can take up to three weeks in healthy dogs, and twice as long in older pets and those with underlying immunosuppressive conditions. Puppies can also take a bit longer to recover.

Since a serious episode of kennel cough can result in pneumonia, if your dog doesn't start to improve on his own with the support of nontoxic remedies (such as nosodes, slippery elm bark, Echinacea, goldenseal and olive leaf), or if the cough becomes progressively worse, it's important to make an appointment with your veterinarian to be on the safe side.

4. Pneumonia — If your dog's cough sounds wet or is productive, it could be the result of a buildup of fluid in the lungs. Fluid or phlegm in the lungs is a red flag for pneumonia, which can have a variety of causes. Other symptoms include loss of appetite, weight loss, fever, lethargy and difficulty breathing.

Bacterial pneumonia is caused by a pathogen, and there are several organisms that can result in infection. Typically your dog will require antimicrobial drugs, rest, immune support and specific supportive therapies. Fungal pneumonia is the result of a deep fungal lung infection, and is more difficult to treat. Since many dogs don't respond to anti-fungal drugs, the precise treatment for fungal pneumonia will depend on what type of fungus has caused the infection.

I recommend you ask your veterinarian about inhalation therapy, which is one of the most effective, direct ways to treat these types of lung infections. Another type of pneumonia is aspiration pneumonia, also called inhalation pneumonia. This is a condition in which the lungs become inflamed and infected as the result of breathing in a foreign substance like vomit, regurgitated gastric acid or food.

Aspiration pneumonia is life threatening, and the prognosis for most dogs with the condition is poor, so the goal should always be prevention. If you suspect your dog has aspirated something, it's important to get her to your veterinarian or an emergency animal clinic right away.

5. Collapsing trachea — A recurrent, episodic cough that sounds like a goose honk can be a sign of a collapsing trachea — especially if your dog is a small breed. Tracheal collapse is a chronic, progressive disease that can be either congenital or acquired. Dogs with the condition also typically show signs of exercise intolerance, respiratory distress and gagging while eating or drinking.

Treatment options for a collapsing trachea include medical management, which works for about 70 percent of dogs with a mild form of the condition. More serious cases often require highly specialized surgery. Cartilage building supplements are also given to maintain the integrity of tracheal cartilage.

6. Heart disease — Coughing is unfortunately also a symptom of heart disease in dogs. Other signs include a bluish color to the tongue, loss of appetite, fatigue, weakness, decreased exercise endurance, a too-fast or too-slow heartbeat and difficulty breathing. If your dog has been diagnosed with a heart condition and coughs mainly while he's resting, lying down or at night, it could be a sign the disease is progressing.

Treatment of heart disease in dogs depends on a variety of factors including the severity of the problem, the age and health of the animal, cost of treatment and other considerations. A visit to a board-certified veterinary cardiologist can provide more information about the severity of your dog's condition.

There are a variety of natural therapies that can support a weakened cardiovascular system, so consult your holistic veterinarian for the best options for your pet's individual situation.

Other conditions that can cause coughing in your dog include chronic bronchitis, heartworm disease and some types of cancer. If your dog's cough doesn't resolve quickly on its own, it should be investigated, and the sooner you make an appointment with your veterinarian, the better your pet's chances for either a full recovery or a well-managed condition.

[aweebwrites]

Consequences

Warning: like one swear word.

_________________

(Here you are anon! So sorry it’s late! Eternal thanks to my lovey beta @thelucariosfish! UwU)

________________

“Shit…” Kai says with a shaky exhale, looking down at his burnt arms once he was alone.

This was bad. Then again, he had been using his fire almost continuously for three hours. He may be resistant to fire but that doesn't mean he was completely fireproof. Fuck. He can't hide this. He jolts once he heard footsteps approaching, quickly hiding his arms.

“Kai.” Wu says then opened the door to see him sitting there.

“Uh- hey Sensei! What can I do for you?” He asked with a nervous, unconvincing grin.

Wu looked unimpressed.

“Just in case you have forgotten, I have fought alongside elemental masters before. I know what happens when any of them use their powers for too long.” He reminded Kai who frowned, looking away. “The doctors need to treat your burns right away. By how long it took to defeat this month's major villain, I know they are extensive.” He says and Kai nodded, standing up.

He was careful to not let his hands touch anything, the burns stretching up to his elbows. His palms suffered the worst of it, holding third degree burns. From his palm to the middle of his arm, as well as the back had second degree burns and everywhere else up to his elbows had first degree. Everywhere that was burnt and wasn't his palms hurt something fierce. The fact that he can't feel the burns on his palms worried him. What also worried him was the low glow both his hands held. Wu talked about this. Talked about what could happen if damage suffered from overuse of their elements was left unchecked. It would corrupt them, make them monsters. Was that happening to him? He should stop trying to hide the damages he suffered but when he looked at Zane who went offline because of the frost in his systems or Nya who fainted from dehydration or Jay who was blacked out with electrical burns all over his back and hands or Cole who was too weak to even breathe right or Lloyd who was so exhausted, he had slipped into a fucking coma… his measly burns seemed insignificant.

He followed Wu into the doctor's office where elemental master after elemental master was hospitalized. While Sensei Wu oversaw their treatment to help reduce their elemental energies to normal levels, they will need medical care for the damage sustained. It's just… The bad guy commanded mythical creatures of all types. It was when he pulled out Hydras did they had trouble. Fucking Hydras. He never even heard of them before today. He and Skylor had to use fire to cauterize the wounds on the things after they figured out that cutting off the heads didn't work. He ended up doing most of it since Skylor was stretched thin as is. She was suffering from overstimulation. The slightest breeze sent her into utter agony.

And the other elemental masters… They wouldn't have asked them to help if they hadn't desperately needed it. The wendigos were definitely a problem they needed help with. But in the end of it all, Neuro had pushed his powers as hard as they did but lost the ability to isolate his thoughts from everyone else's and couldn't turn it off. It was quite literally driving him mad but the hospital has been treating them for awhile now. They had the soundproof vengestone-lined room ready for him with dim lights and soft music.

Tox was out of it and will have to stay on dialysis for a while to remove the excess toxins from her blood stream. Chamille can't return to her original looks, trapped somewhere between two different appearances. It was an uncomfortable situation for her but Misako is already speaking with her, reminding her of herself. Gravis had a serious case if motion sickness. Everything has to remain completely still for a while so he was left to recover with nurses watching from afar. Karlof was suffering from iron poisoning and was now resting with an IV in to lower his iron levels. Ash was still trying to form half of his body that was nothing but smoke lingering close by resting and thinking if himself as whole constantly. Shade was stuck on the shadows. He couldn't free himself and had no choice but to calm himself and wait. Griffin's adrenaline levels were sky high and his body felt like a giant sore. They had to sedate him to get him to rest but they predicted that he would be significantly better when he wakes up. Paleman was usually always invisible- at least skin wise but it was an entirely different thing to make everything on your person invisible. He's been invisible so long, his powers seem to have stalled and he was now very visible- which he hated to the point where he requests no visitors. All he needed to do was rest at least.

“Kai.” He jolted back to reality and blinked to find himself laying back in a hospital bed.

When the heck did that happen? When did they take off his gi? When did they put in an IV?

“The others will be fine. Do not worry.” Wu told him and he blinked up at him.

“How can you say that?” Kai whispered, looking at him in disbelief. “Lloyd's in a coma. Zane is offline. Cole is on a respirator. Nya nearly died from dehydration. Jay has spinal damage plus burn damage. Of course I'll worry. Especially when all I got was-”

“Third degree burns to your palms. Which means that the skin there is irreversibly damaged and it's why your palms look so yellow.” Wu pointed out, cutting Kai off. “You need to have surgery to remove all the dead skin from your palms and have grafting done to replace the skin that won't grow back.” Kai looked surprised.

Surgery?

“This is not a competition of who is hurt the most Kai. The fact that you were all hurt is terrible enough.” Wu says quietly. “You won't be able to use your powers the longest. Your palms need time to heal or else you may have to go without. Another situation like this may cause more damage than doctors are able to repair.” He told him and Kai could read between the lines.

If he uses his powers to this extent again, the damage might lead to him losing his hands. He looked up once the door opened.

“It's time for the surgery.” A nurse says as she and two others entered.

“I will be there once it is over.” Wu assured, stepping aside so they could wheel him away.

Wu watched him go with a sigh. He slipped off his hat and rubbed his face, looking obviously stressed.

“You've done everything you could.” He looked up once Misako walked in.

“Misako. How is Chamille?” He asked her, slipping his hat on.

“Resting. She won't be able to revert to her own form for a long time.” She told him then placed a hand on his shoulder. “They are all recovering. Signs look promising. Even Lloyd is showing signs of waking up soon. He will still need a lot of rest but things are looking up.” She says with a smile and he nodded with a soft sigh.

“I just wish there was more to be done to prevent the effects of using their powers for too long.” He spoke quietly.

“We're doing everything we-”

“Teacher Wu!” They whirled around to see the panicked nurse who was holding the door open, panting heavily from running it seems.

“What is it?” Wu asked, walking over to her, feeling dread filling him.

“We-” The nurse took a breath. “We have a big problem. It's Neuro.” He says, looking at them terrified.

Misako and Wu look at each other horrified before they ran out, the nurse leading the way.

“We should have seen it coming. He wasn't recovering like he used to! In fact, he began to slowly get worse! We were going to call either of you but we heard you were busy with the others so we hadn't wanted to bother you! We should have! The fault is ours! Oh only-”

“Tell us what happened.” Misako says, cutting him off as they rushed down a short flight of stairs towards where they were holding Neuro.

“We- the vengestone around the holding area. It was cracked. We hadn't known until just moments ago. The thoughts of everyone in the nearby vicinity still reached him. When we realised, it was too late.” He says as they rushed into the monitoring room, Wu all but pushing the doctor looking at the screens in horror aside.

Wu gasped as he saw Neuro inside, screaming as he clawed at his head that was growing at a rate that was almost visible to the human eye, gray fluids leaking from his eyes, nose, ears and mouth, his eyes rolled back in his head.

“Oh no.” Wu whispered as he stepped back.

The corruption was too advanced. He never treated corruption this far along before. Puri-Tea won't work on this. Neither will Sereni-Tea. He turned to the doctors.

“Run.” He told them and they looked at each other, eyes wide in our and fear.

Neuro screamed again but this time, his powers were unleashed, making them all grip their heads as a feeling of rusty nails tearing into their minds over them.

“Run!” He yelled at them again, gritting his teeth against the assault.

They didn't need to be told a third time. They all rushed out, holding their heads still, setting of the fire alarm along the way.

“Wu! We have to go to!” Misako gritted out, her head throbbing.

“No. I have to stop him. Look after the Ninja.” He ordered her.

“No! I- I won't leave you!” She yelled as blood began to run from her ears and nose.

“If you stay, you'll die! Go!” He yelled at her and she looked at him, wanting to protest further but knowing he was right.

He's not like her. Human. He had a far better chance of survival than she did. She swallowed then nodded before taking off. Wu breathed out then pressed the button to open the door then rushed in, staff held firm. Neuro turned to look at him, the gray matter oozing out of his mouth in an endless stream.

“Forgive me Neuro. I wish there was another way.” Wu whispered, ignoring the headache increasing in pain.

Neuro wasn't there anymore. Only this creature he was forced to become. Was still becoming. It gurgled out a growl then screaming as he pounced. Wu steeled himself, staff held in front of him. A twist of the middle segment made a lengthy, sharp point of vengestone appear at the tip.

Forgive me.

__________________________

(Ok laptop. Don’t fail me now. I had a lot of fun writing this! Again, sorry it’s so late! I did tweak your prompt a little. The motion sickness thing seemed to suit Gravis better so I got a little creative. I hope its ok though!)