#i love jon but by god

[i-eat-mold]

wait so i haven’t seen anyone talk about this but. can we appreciate the parallels between the magnus archives and the magnus protocol when it comes to filing, especially as mentioned in their respective pilot episodes? the first solid 5 minutes of MAG1 is john archivist straight up complaining about how shitty of a job the previous archivist apparently did and how messy everything is, how it’s gonna take years to put some mild order to the whole thing. and then half of First Shift is Alice explaining sam the meticulous but dreadingly boring filing system there’s set up and that they cannot for the life of them care about a smidge. MY THEORY is that jon was so UTTERLY TRAUMATIZED by those thousands of misfiled statements his soul haunts the computers in TMP as a ghost making sure not one of them is misplaced, lost, or unlabeled. in this essay i will

[everwalldigan]

To anyone who thinks Bruce has a clear and consistent favourite child I raise you this: it is infinitely funnier for Bruce to have a complicated and elaborate “ranking” system of his kids that only he’s privy to.

Picture this: Batman, dosed with truth serum, gets asked as a gag from one of the goons holding him captive who his favourite bat-vigilante is and instead of giving a straight answer, he launches into this whole explanation about the ranking system and who’s in the current lead, who’s hanging behind, etc. At some point (this is a mystery to everyone involved) a whiteboard appears and he starts explaining his system like he’s a football coach before an important match. Out of nowhere he starts pulling out little cardboard cutouts of his kids and pins them to the board. At some point the red string comes out.

Jason hasn’t killed someone in a week? Automatically promoted to favourite. Tim hasn’t caused an international incident in the past month? Puts him a few points ahead that keep decreasing the longer he refuses real sleep (20 minute power naps don’t count Tim! Says powernap inventor Bruce Wayne). Cass gave him a hug this morning and wished him a good day? Favourite until he gets a call from dick telling him (without shouting!!!!) that he’ll be there for this week’s Sunday dinner. Duke accidentally scratches the Batmobile? Demoted to the “in trouble” zone (which, honestly, that’s where his kids spend most of the time in😭). Damian did not attempt to free all the animals in the zoo they visited? Favourite. Until Bruce found out he was just trying to conceal the cat hidden in his room that Bruce explicitly forbade him from keeping.

Dick arrives at the family dinner with a busted shoulder and a bruise the size of Texas on his face? Gets demoted so far down that even azraeil scores higher than him. He’s in the “in trouble” zone for a constant month after that. Oh one of them survived an almost death? Favourite for at least the next week. At least. Multiple people survive an almost death? EVERYONES the favourite. The least favourite is the growing grey hairs on his head.

The end of day results are decided by who bothers to wish him goodnight and if all of them have fucked up in some way the past week then Jon (Kent) becomes the automatic favourite until someone cracks a joke that Bruce actually finds funny.

The favourite child changes daily, hourly even, and his kids are aware this system exists and keep trying to crack the code but he always Knows and just smirks smugly.

[tampire]

♪ Everyday, it's a-getting closer ♪

♪ Going faster than a rollercoaster ♪

♪ Love like yours will ♪

♪ Surely come my way ♪

♪ A-hey, a-hey-hey ♪

Gabriel and Beelzebub eventually survive the consequences of The Metatron and Satan

Bonus:

[saragrosie]

I have been sketching. So much tma. Here's some expansions on my Jon and Martin designs I've been doing.

Another note I forgor to mention is I love how after hearing Simon go "it's enough to make your hair turn white" about Martin's office in s4 many of us collectively agreed his hair turned white because of his association with the Lonely. The shared consciousness is real and we use it to play hot potato with the communal brain cell dedicated to the sillies.

Closeup of apocalypse boyfriends (also to the person who said they love my s5 Jon's fancy white girl updo: I think about that every day)

[frosted-woods]

autumn time to be gay and totally fine and not miserable at all

[ceaselessims]

the fact that martin blackwood haters exist is so confusing to me like he's a bitch who moans and complains but also sets fire to things for fun and successfully manipulates avatars and gets jealous about the avatar of death waking up his boyfriend up from a coma and is both jon's staunchest defender and not afraid to call out jon's bullshit

[potato-lord-but-not]

assorted tma doodles because I love my disaster gays 🫶

[arunneronthird]

u may think this is a joke (which it is) but also jon has managed to literally forgive damian for everything hes done in every single universe hes been in and no one else

[wigglyscardigan]

my favorite parts of the cinderella’s castle playbill

[nobbyarts]

Old silly art of Jon the cat dad 🫶❤️

[soapcan18]

I absolutely LOVE Wiggly’s characterization in NPMD. He’s in the show for less than ten minutes and he fuckin STEALS it.

Obviously he’s terrifying in Black Friday, that’s HIS show, but throughout the entire show he keeps up the cutesy persona to trick the characters, occasionally saying something rlly fucked up but still in that register (“RIGHTTT THE FUUUUCK UPPP” and “DEEECKKK THE HALLSS WITH UR GUTSY WUTSIES”).

But in NPMD, he’s a bit different and it’s INTENTIONAL. During The Summoning, he’s still using cutesy-speak, but his voice is a bit deeper as he’s not presenting as an innocent plushie anymore, he’s asserting his power over the teens and toying with them. When he gets excited, he loses the act and yells “WHATEVER WE WANT???” is a deeper tone. When he gets pissed, him and the rest of the LIB scream “WE DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOUR PHONE!” Finally, at the end of The Summoning, he’s completely dropped the act: “Pay the price, or FUCK OFF.” He doesn’t care if the teens go through with the deal or not, and because he’s not actively being worshipped by them or exploiting them like in Black Friday, he doesn’t bother with the niceties or particularly care. Overall, he just seems very done with them by the end of the song (bro did NOT wanna be summoned).

THEN, the final time we hear him, he grabs hold of Max and shows himself. His voice is the deepest it’s EVER been, and there’s NO cutesy-speak to be found except the teasing “Maxie” nickname. He’s ELATED to have another soul, and fully yells: “You’re in my world now, BITCH.” THIS is the true Wiggly—not masking his intent with friendliness, not playing nice to manipulate someone, not even toying with them, just FULL sadistic pleasure to have another soul to claim. And that’s SUCH an epic high note to end the character on.

Hats off to Jon for being to portray such a horrifying, larger-than-life character with such depth and depravity, not to mention his INCREDIBLE voice work and physical acting. I didn’t even note Wiggly’s terrifying laugh yet; I fuckin LOVE it and you can hear it in NPMD if you pay attention.

In summary, Wiggly is the best. Thank you.

[aziuuu]

I uh, got myslef into another fandom... Send help I'm gonna go insane and binge the whole show second time in a row aaaaaaaaaa

[22bananapudding]

an observation

[these-dark-truths]

ah yes, the duality of man (jonny sims tma and jonny sims mechs)

[somuchbetterthanthat]

It's not that I'm against Jon killing Elias, narratively it makes obvious and satisfying sense and we do get Elias's "good luck" which still makes me insane to this day, etc.

but ALSO i kinda want to see the version where Elias is right. Where Jon can't do it. Where Jon is all powerful and godlike and vengeful and when his hands grasp Elias's wrists, when he's on top of him full of anger his teeth bared ready to kill the man who made him who he is today, instead he sees all he is today and he crumbles against Elias's chest and he weeps.

and elias takes a deep, shuddering breath (because the fear WAS here) and then murmurs "there, there. It's quite alright, Jon. Truly. You are magnificent. It's alright, I love you." and gently wrap his arms around him and they lay on the floor like that, as the Eye Watches.

[thegaydepressedone]

I'm thinking about Jon and Martin in the safehouse after the Change

I'm thinking of them laying in bed together, comforting one another, distracting themselves from what waits outside.

I'm thinking about how Martin would begin to gently stroke Jon's head. Slowly, subtly, he would begin to run his fingers through the length of Jon's hair. Eventually, Jon would notice the light tugging of Martin teasing apart the knots, and he would murmur, "What are you doing?"

and Martin would sadly whisper, "You haven't been brushing it..."