#What am i supposed to do with my life now????????

[pathologicalreid]

merry christmas, please don't call | s.r.

in which Spencer pens an email to you, since you've already blocked his phone number

who? spencer reid x fem!reader category: angst content warnings: nondescript break up, described as spencer's fault, reader is mentioned to have worn lipstick, yearning, word count: 907 a/n: and the worst part is!!! that we both know!!!!! we are doing kind of an unofficial margotmas/reidmas! really i've just been building up christmas ideas for a while lol

To: xreader@gmail.com From: Spencer.Reid@gmail.com Subject: Merry Christmas

Hey,

Spencer shook his head, that was too casual.

Good afternoon,

Much too formal.

Hello,

Too rigid.

Darling,

I passed by the house that you told me you adored. It used to be your dream house; you’d always show me the Zillow listing whenever you were browsing. The owners didn’t put up their Christmas lights this year, and it looks like they’re getting ready to sell. I haven’t been online to check the listing, that was always your thing rather than mine.

Do you remember the house? It had four bedrooms for our kids to sleep in and a library with stained-glass windows. You always told me the stained-glass windows were your favorite feature of my apartment. I keep it covered now; the colored glass just serves as a painful reminder of you.  

Emily called me last week. I suppose no one told her that we weren’t together anymore because she asked what our holiday plans were. I haven’t made any since you left. I’m finding myself hopeful that we get called on a case over Christmas so that I don’t need to be surrounded by the world celebrating while I continue to wallow in the memories of you and me.

That’s all I have now: memories. We made so many of them over the course of three years that I don’t know what to do with them. I’ve always had the sneaking suspicion that having an eidetic memory is a curse just as much as it is a blessing, but with you gone, I know it’s more of a curse. I see you when I close my eyes as if your features have been permanently tattooed on the back of my eyelids, but when my eyes are open, everything is exponentially worse.

You left in such a hurry, so you were bound to leave a few things behind. When I went to make a cup of coffee and found one of your mugs in my cabinet, JJ and Penelope had to practically scrape me off the kitchen floor. There was still a lipstick smudge on it, a piece of our history the dishwasher couldn’t quite wash off. Your necklace was on the bedside table, though maybe that was left behind on purpose. I wish we could go back to the day I gave it to you, you could wear the same green dress, and maybe work wouldn’t get in the way. If I could, I’d call you to ask why you left it behind, but you’ve blocked my number.

There was no need for you to leave me things to remember you by, how could I ever forget you?

I’ve been finding myself grateful that you got so close with Garcia during our relationship, she doesn’t give me any explicit details on your life when she updates me. I never ask, but she knows I want to hear.

It’s a rather odd phenomenon to have once had someone who you shared everything with, only to one day find they want nothing to do with you. I always find myself reaching for my phone to send to a message, or leaning over to show you a line in my book, but you’re not there anymore. I don’t hold any malice in my heart for you, even after you called it all off. My biggest regret is that I couldn’t be the boyfriend that you needed, and I’m proud of you for realizing you wanted someone better. I’m sorry I couldn’t be better.

Maybe I still have some growing up to do. There might be some sort of emotional stunting as a result of my less-than-orthodox upbringing and education, which makes sense when you consider two of my most common nicknames, “boy genius” and “kid.” One day I could find myself in the same place you were, ready for more, but maybe then I’ll be with someone who is ready for the same things as I am. She’ll never be you though. You’ll always hold that special place in my heart.

Speaking of my upbringing, my mom keeps asking about you. Each time we talk on the phone, she asks if she can talk to you, but I’ve been telling her that you’re still working or are otherwise preoccupied. I know I shouldn’t lie to her, but if I tell her, she’ll inevitably forget, and I’ll be forced to recount the story of how I lost the best thing to ever happen to me forever. That would be my eternal damnation. There’s Sisyphus and Tantalus and Spencer Reid, slowly becoming nothing but a myth. I wonder if I’m a story that you tell your friends at O’Keefe’s.

I go there sometimes, just to see if I can catch your gaze, but you’re never there.

I know this is your favorite holiday, and I don’t intend to ruin your holidays with my message. I suppose I just needed to see if you still dream about that house. To see if you still dream of me the way I dream of you.

Merry Christmas,

Spencer

He clicked send nervously, ready to snap his work-issued laptop shut when it chirped with a notification. Surely you hadn’t responded that quickly. Spencer opened his inbox once more, checking the latest email.

To: Spencer.Reid@gmail.com From: mailer-daemon@googlemail.com Subject: Delivery Status Notification (Failure)

Message blocked.

Your message to xreader@gmail.com has been blocked. See technical details below for more information.

[whistlewritesforfun]

I had been (sorta) (kinda) (maybeeeeee) running a cult out of my ranch for years now. It was going pretty well I’d say! It was small but that made it inconspicuous. It was generating plenty of money for me and nobody cared enough about the run down ranch a few miles outside of town that the stranger individuals would visit frequently.

We had just finished up the usual “sacrifice” of a rat, a stringy thing I decided to put out of its misery after seeing it in a pathetic little tank in the store, when a blinding light emerged from its carcass. It was this odd grayish green color. Reminiscent of a rather painful turd or some especially stinky vomit.

Of course every religion needs a figurehead. I’d found some random God in an old history textbook from my mythology class. I’d just so happened to choose one that had a rodent schtick.

You could imagine my surprise when the little rat I’d just speared through exploded with that ugly green light, then warped and twisted. Convulsing about as it changed shape into what could best be described as a star made out of flesh, bone, and rat fur. It was hands down, the GROSSEST thing I’d ever seen.

And THEN the thing had the audacity to start speaking. Every utterance from its tongue caused another convulsion in the warped rat, a faint glow of that green emitting from the eyes. Which were much too far apart by this point. It really was horrible to look it, there were little bones sticking out and puncturing the flesh everywhere. Eugh. I should’ve picked a less gross god, maybe then I would’ve be in this horrendous predicament.

The warped rat body spoke to the congregation for about 30 minutes. For 25 of that I wasn’t paying attention because I didn’t want to barf all over my supposed deity. (There were little droplets of that disgusting rat blood on my ceremonial carpet. That particularly irked me.) For the last 5, I do not think I shall soon forget it.

“This my dear congregation!” (The rat… thingy… hovered a little bit closer to me.) “is a true servant! A true leader! And a true follower. He has blessed you with the gift of my existence. He has shepherded you along the way and through adversity to create my return! This man! He is now my high priest, henceforth until his death!”

“I’m what?” I couldn’t stop the blunt words from falling out of my mouth.

“You’re my high priest!”

“… riiiiiiiiiiiiight.”

“Do you… have doubts?” The rat-jumble asked, its scratchy voice reminded me of someone who was talking right after waking up, but very deep and highly unsettling.

“Am I really quite… priestly enough?” I asked, cringing slightly. It was evident I had made a very very grave mistake by this point.

“You’ve been preaching g for months. You brought me back from my slumber. I was sure I’d never be worshipped again. You are most certainly my high priest.” He… it… the rat thingy assured. I just nodded. I had entirely screwed myself. I was gonna be stuck with this cult the rest of my life…

“To go with your title high-priest, I will bestow on you a gift of my choosing.” Oh goody. Please don’t be dead rats. Please don’t be dead rats.

The rat sphere drifted nearer, the dripping of blood still grating on my nerves. Keeping the abject terror off my face was difficult beyond imagination. The orb then rotated so wherever the tail went in the warped carcass could tap me gently. As it did, I felt the most exhilarating burst of what I can only describe as rat magic.

“You shall be able to heal even the most sick and miserable. With your words, your touch, your compassion. The spread of sound and healthfulness shant be stopped but by your own limitation.”

I wasn’t sure what was appropriate at that moment so I kneeled. A particularly bad idea, as it now bug me in the rat-blood splash zone. I mean SERIOUSLY! This is the grossest vessel that he could’ve possibly picked! My carpet is entirely ruined!

With that final statement however, the pen fell to the ground with the most hideous mush noise, a few crackles, and what can best be written as a “Skrrrrrrsht.”

Now what on earth was I to do with this information… or ability. I certainly couldn’t heal my mind from what I’d just witnessed transpire. Believe me, I was trying. The divine are disgusting. So I wordlessly lead my congregation out of the doors of my makeshift chapel, and to the Waffle House half a mile away.

As is usual for Saturdays, we all ate at the Waffle House in our congregation robes. Today though. The viscous syrup warming my throat brought to mind the mental imagery of the rat blood. I shoved it aside and decided maybe to forgo the waffles… just for today.

You started a scam religion for a quick buck. You begin to panic when your fake god was actually a real forgotten one awakened from new worshippers, declared you it's high priest, and granted you the power of healing.

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

This year, my husband - a man with zero prior interest in visual arts or architecture beyond going "That's nice to look at" - has suddenly become enamoured with art deco. This is fun, because it means he gets delighted every time I point out a decorative pillar on a building, or a funky and vertically asymmetrical font. He also has decided that I, a person with an A Level in art, must know all about the art deco movement and be an expert in its design features, so I am having to regularly remind him that this is not the case and he probably knows more than me, given that two weeks ago I walked in on him reading the art deco Wikipedia article for fun and pleasure.

Anyway, this has led him to look up video games featuring art deco, so now we are playing BioShock. So far, we've made it to Arcadia, the forest that got privatised by libertarian maniac Andrew Ryan, and we just had to sit through Ryan ranting at us that he built a paradise while we just want to steal it from him; which is very interesting, given that Rapture is a crumbling ruin of a fallen civilisation filled with post-apocalyptic cannibalistic thugs trying to murder little girls and each other for corpse juice. Like, my dude, my guy, what exactly is anyone supposed to be taking from you. Do you think this is still working? Do you think this is successful? Corpse juice. Dude.

Anyway this is also the life of Elon Musk on Twitter

[thedeskofaltoclef]

How I became The Desk of Alto Clef.

My response to a SCP Group designed around Hate and Bigotry who have targeted me and others in this community.

Nah, man, my daughter is dead.

It has been brought to my attention that there is a group of people on the internet who are fascinated with my fascination of Alto Clef and Meri. Hurtful and yet cute in a way so I think now I'll choose this time and these screen grabs from their discord to explain how I came to be 'The Desk of Alto Clef'.

My Daughter died six years ago and it sent me spiraling deep into the bottom of whatever bottle I could find.

I was completely prepared to take my own life and even had the things to 'finish the job' because my life had no meaning at that point. What was another statistic going to matter anyways, right?

It was in one of these dark, drunk moments with a gun when I fell across the Volgun's video on 'reality benders and you' and fell into a rabbit hole.

Drunkenly I fumbled around the wiki and learned more about this broken man known as Alto Clef.

A man whom I could relate to in my own way. A man who, no matter what he did, could never see his daughter as I will never be able to see mine. So thus, I became a very, very shitty cosplayer.

I like to believe that over the past four years my acting ability has increased to a sustainable level and as much as I joke about things I do try to stay humble about it. Though I like to think I've become better but I digress.

I love the lore of Clef and Meri, on or offsite, to the point that I am weird about it I know, but that's how I stay connected to my daughter. Writing the Deskverse is how I stay connected to my daughter.

I am also autistic which causes me to hyper fixate on Clef as a coping mechanism.

Because of this group of people I have greatly considered leaving the community and going back to my own personal solitude. Acting, Voice Acting, Cosplaying as Clef gave and still gives me something to live for again. I may not be this group's cup of tea but I do like to believe that I have helped others. My main goal has always been to uplift those who need uplifting. I do not want anyone to ever feel how I felt in my lowest and darkest moments.

The main story in the deskverse is about a father and a daughter torn apart by the actions of an abusive mother. My real life story.

I also have ZERO clue as to why I am being involved with misogyny or yuri things. If I have offended you in any way I do apologize.

I do not plan on posting the more 'suggestive' or 'lewd' responses they have made. Overly sexualized content does make me extremely uncomfortable.

This group of people have broken my heart into pieces. Seeing this list of images and names dragging me through the mud has already smashed my unstable self-esteem as it is.

At this time I do not plan on releasing any names associated with all of this because I am honestly tired of reliving the most horrid event of my life over and over because I, for whatever reason, do not fit what this group feels is acceptable of an actor/writer/fan.

I cannot say the same for the others in which they were assaulting.

In summary Alto Clef is an outlet for the pain I live with every day. I can never see, hold, hear, smell, or speak to my daughter. I have scars on my body from her mother that will never allow me to forget that life I had. I will always remember the taste of gunpowder but thankfully my drunk ass was too weak. If your going to be bad at something, be bad at that I suppose.

I will leave all of this with a final image from the copious list and the one that honestly hurts me the most. I am honestly a shy and reserved person and frankly it takes a lot for me to get out of my comfort zone. Not long ago I went to another SCP discord server because I wanted to meet new people and someone in there was awesome. I truly enjoyed my time with this person and just found them amazing. They were kind, open, willing to listen to my ideas, and gushed over Numberonedoggo. I thought I had finally made a new friend on my own. I was apparently wrong.

Art, from some of my favorite artists, was made for the sole reason of mocking me specifically. To laugh at me for finding joy in something that gives me purpose. Something I use to drive away the darkness.

No age, disorder, illness, or reason at all can be acceptable for anyone to act in this way. You are all a mockery of everything the SCP community should stand for.

-TheDesk

[doberbutts]

My would-be rapist died earlier this week and I have been having a lot of Complicated Feelings about it since being told. Long story short he died because he was once again being a creep and someone intervened and ended up cracking open his skull and he died from a brain bleed two days later. And I'm just thinking about how 18 years ago this guy was actively attempting to groom me in the middle of church and bible study and only stopped because my parents believed me when they pried the truth out of me. And how that stopped him from pursuing me but not from just switching to Someone Else until it became multiple Someone Else's and the above situation happened.

Truthfully I don't really know what to feel, or think. I am not sad that he is dead. I'm not really happy either. I think he is an excellent example of the multiple failures we have as a society to protect our most vulnerable populations. He is who I think of when I ask what we do with repeat offenders who do not seem to be getting the message that they are making bad choices, and how we're supposed to protect vulnerable people from predators like him.

I do think, for the most part, that prison reform and prison abolition is a good thing. I do think that the death penalty sets a dangerous precedent.

But what do we do with a man who has hurt person after person after person, who even when confined to a facility for the rest of his life (ie, effectively a prison) continues to prey upon patients and staff alike, until he is sent to an all-male facility and even then tries it with a female CNA before another male patient witnesses it and does something about it?

I don't even know if the other guy realizes what a service he's done to this dude's victims, or the collective sigh of relief his victims took upon the news of his demise.

I will not light a candle for you, Joel. Not even your own family is attending your funeral, or pressing charges against the facility or the man who killed you. But it does make me think about how this could have been better resolved, if it could have been, if a better outcome than a long string of sexual assaults and rapes ultimately ending in a violent death could have been had.

He never did manage to get me. But he would have, if my parents hadn't stepped in on my behalf. He was bold enough to try it while they were just downstairs, reading and discussing from religious texts. Bold enough to put his hands on me in the middle of church as the pastor spoke and everyone could see. To my knowledge, I was his first- or was I? Was he bold because he was inexperienced in doing this, or because he was riding the high of having gotten away with it before? Clearly getting caught just taught him to be more subtle, rather than that he shouldn't have been doing it in the first place.

I think if he had succeeded with me, I would currently be very glad to hear about his death.

But he didn't, so now I am thinking about these things. And feeling a little, play stupid games win stupid prizes.

[angelart67]

100% I AM DONE CARING AT ALL WHAT THE SCREAMING SLEEPY SHEEPLES GOT TO SAY, CAUSE NOT ONE OUNCE OF THAT BS MAKES SENSE... I HAVE LITERALLY HAD PEOPLE JUMP MY 💩 TRYING TO CONVINCE ME THAT DONALD TRUMP IS OUT TO STEAL FROM ME & OTHERS... BUT NOT A SINGLE ONE OF THOSE SPOOKS CAN LOGICALLY EXPLAIN ANY OF THE FOLLOWING, AT ALL...

1) IN 2016 TERM HE DID NOT ACCEPT THE PAY THAT IS NORMALLY GIVEN TO THE SITTING PRESIDENT, SO HEY YEAH, THAT REALLY SCREAMS GREEDY PERSON...

2) THERE WAS SO MUCH DAMN PROOF OF ELECTION TAMPERING, THAT WAS RELEASED, TO THE PUBLIC &, WAS SEEN BY MILLIONS, ACTUAL VIDEOS SHOWING POLL WORKERS BRINGING IN BOXES OF MORE BALLOTS IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT & SHOVING THEM UNDER TABLES, SURE, WE ARE JUST NOIDED OUT, BUT NOBODY CAN EXPLAIN WHAT THAT SHADY BS WAS ALL ABOUT... OR HOW CROOKED JOE ENDED UP ALLEGEDLY, IN SOME STATES, GETTING MORE VOTES, THAN THERE WERE REGISTERED VOTERS, YET Y'ALL CLAIM WE ARE JUST SORE LOSERS... NOOOO, WE ARE WINNERS, BECAUSE OF THE REPRESENTATION OF OUR CHOSEN PRESIDENT, WHO STUCK BY US THRU THE DARKEST BS, INCLUDING ATTEMPTS ON THE MANS FREEDOM & LIFE...

3) D. TRUMP DID EVERYTHING HE POSSIBLY COULD DO, DURING THE SHUT DOWN, TO HELP CITIZENS WHO NEEDED MONEY TO LIVE ON, EAT & PAY BILLS, & BE ABLE TO KEEP THEIR FAMILY AFLOAT, THRU STIMULUS CHECKS, & ADDED FOOD BENEFITS... FACT IS, HE WAS ATTEMPTING A FINAL PAYMENT, BUT WAS SHOVED OUT THE DOOR & CROOKED JOE TOOK CREDIT FOR THAT LAST STIMULUS CHECK, HE REALLY HAD ZIP TO DO WITH...

4) D. TRUMP TRIED TO ALLOW CITIZENS TO HAVE ACCESS TO MEDICATION, WHICH HAS SINCE THEN BEEN PROVEN COULD HAVE HELPED SICK PEOPLE WITH SYMPTOMS, BUT FAUCI'S DIRTY TEAM SHUT HIM DOWN ON THAT EFFORT, & WAY MORE PEOPLE DIED AS A RESULT...

5) DEMS DID EVERYTHING THEY POSSIBLY COULD COME UP WITH DURING HIS 1ST TERM, AS WELL AS DURING THE 2020 TERM, TO KEEP HIM TIED UP IN COURT, FOR SOME OF THE MOST BOGUS BS CHARGES EVER, SO HE WAS CONSTANTLY DEFENDING HIMSELF, MAKING HIS PRESIDENTIAL EFFORTS, & THEN CAMPAIGN EFFORTS BEYOND DIFFICULT, YET BIDEN GOT AWAY WITH OBVIOUS MONEY LAUNDERING, THRU THE UKRAINE & HIS ADDICT OFFSPRING, & IT WAS PROVEN THAT HUNDREDS OF CHILD PORN PICS WERE FOUND ON THAT SICK IDIOTS LAPTOP, BUT THAT GOT COVERED UP & SWEPT UNDER THE RUG & NOW DADDY PARDONS HIM FOR ALL MANNER OF DISGUSTING BS, HE WOULD HAVE DONE SO MUCH TIME FOR...

EVERYTHING THAT HAS TAKEN PLACE SINCE 2019, (ESPECIALLY) BLATANTLY, RIGHT IN OUR FACES, WHICH ADDED INSULT TO INJURY, FROM DELIBERATE CREATION OF COVID-19 & RELEASING IT IN THE U.S. & THEN NOT INFORMING US, IT WAS RUNNING RAMPANT, UNTIL FAR TOO LATE, RESULTING IN HORRIBLE ILLNESS, & EVEN GENOCIDE OF SO MANY COUNTLESS PEOPLE, WHO HAVE BEEN TERMED AS EVERYTHING FROM "USELESS EATERS" TO MORE RECENTLY, "GARBAGE" BUT NOTHING GETS DONE TO THOSE RESPONSIBLE... WE ARE JUST EXPECTED TO SHUT UP & ACCEPT, POPULATION CONTROL AGAINST OUR CITIZENS, WHILE OUR COUNTRY WAS ALLOWED TO BE OVERRUN BY ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS... ALL OF THIS UTTER BS WITH BOTH JOE B. & KAMALA H. BEING PUPPETS FOR PEOPLE WHOSE TERMS WERE UP, BUT THEY REFUSE TO GIVE UP DIRTY HIDDEN CONTROL... ALL THE PEOPLE WHO TOOK PART IN ISLAND HOPPING & PARTYING & SICKENING SEX CRIMES... IN OUR FACES PEDOPHILE BEHAVIOR FROM THE DEGENERATE SUPPOSEDLY THE PRESIDENT, WHO WAS NOT FAIRLY VOTED IN, TOUCHING & SNIFFING OF CHILDREN, & WOMEN, & EVEN INCLUDING HIS OWN FAMILY MEMBERS, & WE ARE SUPPOSED TO LOOK THE OTHER WAY BECAUSE HE HAS DEMENTIA, BUT HE IS STILL ALLOWED TO REMAIN AS PRESIDENT (ALLEGEDLY) ??

SO MANY CORRUPT PEOPLE DOING SO MUCH CORRUPT BS, & WE ARE ALL EXPECTED TO JUST SHUT UP & ACCEPT IT HAPPENING... WELL, WE DO NOT ACCEPT IT, IT IS A BUNCH OF BS, NO OTHER WAY TO STATE IT, BUT REST ASSURED, PEOPLE WILL BE ANSWERING FOR THEIR BLATANT ACTIONS OF TREASON AGAINST OUR COUNTRY... YOU JUST DO NOT COME IN & TAKE OVER, & DO WHATEVER YOU WANT, EVERYTHING COMES TO AN END, EVENTUALLY & PEOPLE END UP, ANSWERING FOR THEIR CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY, IT IS COMING... DON'T THINK WE MISSED THE FACT THAT YOU TRIED TO MURDER OUR CHOSEN CHOICE OF PRESIDENT, BUT YOU MISSED... DONALD TRUMP WILL NOT MISS... HAVEN'T YOU ALL PACKED UP YET? BETTER HURRY UP, & WHILE YOU ARE AT IT, WHY DON'T Y'ALL JUST TAKE ALL THE ILLEGALS WITH YOU WHEN YOU GO? I MEAN Y'ALL LOVE THEM & WANNA HELP THEM SO MUCH, YOU CAN JUST START YOUR OWN DAMN COUNTRY SOMEWHERE ELSE, WE DON'T WANT TO BE OVERRUN, & WALKED ALL OVER... DO THAT, YOU WILL ALREADY HAVE A WHOLE BUNCH OF ILLEGAL PEOPLE, YOU CAN JUST MAKE LEGAL AS A FAN BASE FOR YOUR BS ACTIONS, THEY WON'T GIVE 2 💩'S ABOUT IT, CAUSE YOU GIVE THEM HOUSING & JOBS, DESPERATELY NEEDED BY PEOPLE WHO WAS BORN HERE, WHO NOW SIT ON ENDLESS WAIT LISTS, SO PEOPLE WHO SHOULD NOT EVEN BE HERE, CAN HAVE THESE BENEFITS

GO ON & LEAVE, I PROMISE YOU, YOU WON'T BE MISSED EVEN A LITTLE TINY BIT... BUHBYE, JUST GO, WE ARE TAKING OUR COUNTRY BACK FROM YOU CRIMINAL ASSHATS...

[hpgal]

DC X DP: VACATION TO A DIFFERENT UNIVERSE Pt. 1

CW: mentions of death

TLDR: Danny is stressed and depressed feeling like despite all the changes in his life, he feels like he is still the same.

Word Count: 1310

a/n: I plan on making multiple parts to this one but it will take some time. This is more a draft to part 1 than anything else and will most likely end up on AO3 in the future as a more completed version of itself once it is done here on Tumblr. Any feedback and suggestions (or even if you want to continue this plot with your own spin on it as long as I am credited/ tagged so I can read it too!) is very much welcomed!!

Danny wanted a change.

Not just for fun either. Though fun would be nice between all these Ghost King responsibilities he had been forced to start learning for when he comes of age, or well not, technically?

He doesn't know! It's complicated! He was 17 now, but his ghost age was only 3! The Observants said to fully assume the throne his ghost age was supposed to be 18 at the youngest but they'd make an exception for when he was 18 in the living realm.

Ghee, thanks you weirdos, because I totally wanted my adult life to already be over so I can manage my undead life.

Anyways, between trying to graduate and learn his forever job, he had been going to therapy now that he isn't the only ghost fighter in town. He has breaks! A support system! 14 year old Danny would never believe his parents accepted him for his ghostly side!!

His friends learned to fight and trap so well over the years that they don't even need him by their side anymore for every fight. The GIW was chased out of town and supposedly disbanded by the government because "it was a scam and ghosts don't actually exist." Even his parent's business was booming in town.

They started leaving the field work to others and focused on research. They hold ghost defense classes 3 times a week for any and all citizens. They build home defense gadgets and other anti ghost equipment to sell to the town, too. There are even kids from his class who want to get into the field now and intern at FentonWorks.

Over the years, everyone in town has grown incredibly capable of handling ghosts themselves that there is a city funded ghost protection task force. And that is all to deal with the ghosts that are more on the unruly side.

The reality is that it is not exactly necessary anymore to always be prepared for the next daily ghost attack. Since it became public knowledge for the Ghost Zone that he'd be assuming the throne, most ghosts have opted to leave Amity Park alone since it was his haunt. However, he has opened it up to any ghost who wants to visit as long as they do not leave Amity Park. And so, ghosts and the living live in harmony in the town.

In his senior year, the town has become so open to ghosts that when a ghost whose obsession is teaching, they hired him at Casper High! Danny is even in the class. He teaches an elective on astronomy, something the school could never afford. Ghosts didn't want to be paid in cash, so it helped! All Dr. Denver wants was to teach and to be allowed to claim the observatory for his research.

But while all this was great, Danny felt depressed. Which leads him back to why he was in therapy. It felt like all these amazing things have happened. That everyone has changed, except him. Thanks to his halfa status, his physical state isn't changing as much either. He discovered he is aging much, much slower.

Talking to his therapist, she helped him realize that what he craved was for a change for himself. Sure, he IS going to become The Infinite Realms king and that'll be a big change but it isn't what he wants.

He doesn't know what he wants, really. Which meant his therapist has given him an assignment to figure it out. So he talked to Clockwork, naturally hoping for some help. And Clockwork told him something surprising instead.

"Yeah, I'm ready for a change, but I don't know what to change." Danny told him in hopes the wording would draw Clockwork to give him an answer instead of something cryptic. He really didn't want to do the legwork to figure it out while he had midterms to study for and more ghost king lessons with The Observants later.

Clockwork paused as if in thought, "You could take a vacation to your universe of origin," he suggests. "That may help give clarity in what you need to change to be happy."

Danny floated next to him. He couldn't bring himself to be frustrated with the being of time for knowing exactly why Danny was here. Instead, he stared at him in confusion, distracted by what he just said, "What do you mean? I am not from here?"

He grins, his form flickering from old to young, "When you became a halfa, you changed universes from the complicated process you went through to become one."

Danny contemplated for a moment, confused but intrigued. A different universe? I wonder how different it would be from here. Without a second thought, Danny grins eager.

"I wanna go!" He exclaims like a young puppy who discovered a new toy for the first time.

"That would not be a problem, time runs differently between there and here. A week there will be an hour here so you won't need a time medallion." Clockwork simply looks off into the space surrounding them before continuing, "I have a friend who will act as your guardian while there. Head through the star shaped door near the Yetis whenever you are ready and he will be standing by, waiting for you" He shifts back into an older version of himself, pleased with himself for already knowing Danny would be taking this chance to go and made the preparations for this moment weeks ago.

Danny does a small dance in midair without a second thought and starts to drift off in that direction, "Oh, and Danny?" Clockwork calls out, "Legally, you are dead in that universe and.. well, much is different from what you know, so do be careful. Due to how time and the laws of that dimension for being such as myself, I am not the main ruler of time there, so the protection spells I placed on you are not guaranteed to save you this time." Clockwork grins knowingly towards Danny as Danny speeds off, oblivious to how serious his warning was.

---

Danny flies like the wind through the vastness of The Ghost Zone until he arrives at the door Clockwork described. His thoughts start to sour at the thought of this universe where he is considered dead despite it being his origin.

The door he arrives at is huge. Like he was not sure how to open the door huge. But wow, was it beautiful. It was like staring into space itself. It sparkled unlike any night sky he has even gazed upon. As he approached the beautiful door, he hesitated.

He was technically returning home, but he didn't feel any attachment to the universe in front of him. To him, nothing seemed different. Everything was exactly the same when he woke up after the accident, so he never noticed. The entire idea that he abandoned his family and friends by dying here was a horrible thought, but it wasn't his fault. He didn't know what happened here.

Wait, did that mean Vlad wasn't from that universe either? Danny shakes his head at the thought. It was pointless to fall down that particular rabbit hole now.

Maybe he should've asked Clockwork more before flying off without a thought. Clockworks words echoed inside him for fear of what he might find. Was this really a good idea? To return to the place he no longer existed? Could he handle seeing what the grief of his passing had done to those he loved?

A moment passes, and Danny shakes his head and steels himself. He needs to know how much changes, if he really did make an impact. Was he important?

With his decision made, the door seems to open itself. A bright beam of a soft white light floods through the threshold, and Danny steps through.

[writingtraumaforever]

SONIC 3 MOVIE REVIEW (SPOILER FREE ABOVE LINE, SPOILERS BELOW IT):

I am so mixed feeling’d about this movie right now. On one hand, I loved it. It had such a good telling of Sonic and Shadow’s dynamics and stories and how they view one another, and I loved that and will be elaborating more on this in the spoiler section. The changes they made from the video game were 50/50 to me. Some I get, others I just was really disappointed in. The action scenes are AMAZING. Battles are SICK, and I have admittedly been on the fence about Keanu voicing Shadow, but he won me over completely after watching the film.

Team Sonic’s dynamic is top tier in this movie. Knuckles, Sonic and Tails are the lights of my life, I love these brothers so much.

But if you are going into this film expecting a SHADOW movie???? You’re gonna be disappointed. This is, do not be mistaken, absolutely a Jim Carrey movie. This is a Robotnik movie 110%. Idk if they just couldn’t afford too many lines from Keanu or what, but Jim stole most the screen time. Which was hilarious and all, but it definitely stole from the deeper/darker story that was suppose to be at play. They went the insane/funny mad scientist route with Gerald rather than the vengeful and broken man he was, and this kinda falls flat and makes the whole thing feel less dangerous and life-threatening than it actually is.

I will say that what little we ARE given of Shadow is amazing. Thankfully us die-hard Shadow fans are use to picking up whatever scraps SEGA throws at us with this hedgehog and absolutely running with them. And in terms of that, we were given a MEAL. But Shadow’s story was definitely rushed rather than fleshed out. It’s like they gave us about 4 minutes of background for him and were like “Alright. That’s it. That’s him”. And then we just roll with it from then on. My hopes on the reason they did this is because we’ll perhaps get a Shadow the Hedgehog show or movie in the future where they elaborate on all this even more. But as for this movie??? Just be ready for a LOT of Robotnik.

I still think Gerald should’ve just been dead so Shadow could have more screen time instead of them cashing in on Jim Carrey. The movie as a whole was so unserious because of him.

That’s really my biggest letdown.

The whole plot felt VERY rushed. Like they were too worried about getting to the next action scene to really flesh out the story properly. Sadly this happens a lot when writers just ASSUME we know the story already so not all of it needs to be told when we just REALLY want all of it to be told. It’s also obvious they cut back on some plot points so it could stay kid friendly.

But don’t let this discourage you too much! Like I said, it really was a good movie. And it’s probably still up there as my fav simply because Shadow IS in it and Team Sonic’s moments save it for me. Not to mention Sonic and Shadow’s interactions, though few, are absolute perfection and capture them both so dang well like—

I will cherish those scenes forever. Sonadow fans have a FEAST with the scenes they were given, okay???

I give it a solid 7.5/10. Maybe 8 if they add more deleted scenes later or announce a Shadow show. :)))))

10/10 if you’re only there for Jim Carrey (whom I personally don’t care for).

Now for Spoilers:

Pros:

LIVE AND LEARN WAS USED AND WAS THE ABSOLUTE BEST.

The moon is successfully pissed on.

They very much did their best to make it apparent that Sonic and Shadow are the same but were simply given different fates and it’s SO GOOD BUT SO SAD. Like. Two sides to the same coin very much came across.

Them punching each other across continents was SICK.

Shadow pinning Sonic by his head was GAY.

Sonic pinning Shadow by his chest fur was GAY.

Sonic and Shadow’s talk on the moon is easily my favorite thing in the movie. Followed closely by their Super battle against each other and then their Super battle in space. I’ve recently written in my stories about how being super together creates this special bond between them, and these scenes 100% confirm/reinforce that!

Maria and Shadow scenes are PRECIOUS! Her playing guitar for him, him dragging her around the compound with her in skates, them watching the stars together- it was all beautiful!

I’m really glad they allowed a brief moment of clarity that Gerald did in fact love Shadow and care about him at one point because he’s literally the biggest butt the rest of the movie and just uses him.

StoneXRobotnik shippers will be both elated and heartbroken.

So many perfect Sonic and Tails and Knuckles bro moments omggggg their dynamic in this movie was so dang good I died. From Tails saving Sonic’s butt multiple times to Knuckles putting his angry and fiery disposition aside for his brother and handing over the master emerald— it was perfect. Knuckles is big lovable idiot energy, absolutely, but it’s not overdone. He’s serious when he needs to be and is SUCH an oldest brother. I loved his conflict with Sonic AND how he was the one who saved both Tails and Sonic at the end.

WADE IS THE GUARDIAN OF THE MASTER EMERALD.

Shadow being a feminist with his latinas.

“Vengeful guac.”

Shadow and Sonic fighting together in space and constantly checking in on the other! Shadow asking Sonic where he is and using chaos spear to absolutely annihilate every robot after Sonic ahsjdkglg boyfriends protecting each other vibes.

Tbh, the entire scene where Shadow and Sonic are fighting side by side gives such huge soulmate vibes like oh my god they were VERY MUCH CONNECTED.

Their banter is EVERYTHING.

Shadow quoting Maria “even when the star is gone, its light remains” and then looking at Sonic?! GAAY.

Tom and Maria both poking Sonic and Shadow in the chest and telling them who they are in their hearts and who they choose to be is what counts. THIS being what brings them together?? PERFECTION.

Despite my annoyance at the amount of Robotnik in the movie, Eggman’s sacrifice and message to Stone was very touching.

Tails and Stone are the dream team.

Knuckles is forever scared of ghosts.

Shadow going after Tom ONLY because he thought it was the General and then immediately regretting it and feeling guilty when he sees it’s not and then having to watch Sonic cry over his body while Shadow sees himself crying over Maria is PEAK. BROKE MY HEART.

Sonic revisiting his cave. Shadow HAS to find and live in that at some point.

THE DID THE POSE THEY DID THE POSE

“HOT TOPIC”.

AMY ROSE AMY ROSE AMY ROSE AND SHES SO PRETTY AND STRONG OMG SHES SO SICK I LOVE HER SO MUCH ALREADY it looks like they’re trying to make her appear older than she is in the games, so I’m pretty sure they’re gonna be putting her with Sonic at some point. Which is fine by me cus I ship Sonamy too and to me, movie Sonic would be the one of all the versions of Sonic to want to settle down with some girl one day. I mean. His whole story is LITERALLY based around him finally getting to settle somewhere and have a family instead of continuing to run. Makes sense.

METAL SONIC METAL SONIC METAL SONIC

SHADOW PICKING UP HIS INHIBITOR RING AT THE END

Cons:

Um. The words “Faker” and “Ultimate Lifeform” are not ONCE uttered in this movie, and to me?? That’s absolute slander. That alone brought this movie down a whole point in my 1-10 scale, okay??? Negative 5,000 aura. Disgusting. Maybe the Commander possibly mentioned him being the Ultimate Lifeform, but Shadow never did and that’s just WRONG. This is a whole plot point in the game and in their characters from then on in the franchise, and it’s just glossed over!

Maria isn’t sick. The ARK isn’t in space. She isn’t shot. It’s all kinda dull in comparison to the game, tbh. They’re definitely still after her and shooting to kill because the soldier says “we have our orders” when Walters tries to stop him, but he still don’t shoot her so like— again. Dimmed down.

No Prison Island scenes other than the beginning when Shadow breaks out. Which was. Super disappointing.

It’s all just so unserious. Especially the Robotniks.

Chaos are just Japanese mascots. Which is big sad for Cream and Cheese fans.

No creation of Shadow = no Biolizard

No “Sayonara, Shadow the Hedgehog”. They tried to reference this with a joke from Jim Carrey, but it fell flat imo.

Indifferent/Open to:

Shadow came from a meteor. He wasn’t created. While I hate Gerald didn’t inherently create him, I am also glad this leaves room for the Black Arms to become a thing. It’s also very possible GUN and Gerald were both just lying about this. Because it very meticulously did NOT show Shadow actually coming from the meteor in any scenes. It just showed the meteor crash site and how it had Shadow/Balck Arms coloring. So maybe Gerald still did experiment on a hedgehog and stuff and it’s just lied about because that’s like— not okay??? But also, I noticed it never showed any like. Major accident that would’ve caused GUN to suddenly invade like that?? They just suddenly decided Shadow was too powerful and they needed to kill everyone while in the games, there were multiple incidents where people were hurt or compromised by the artificial chaos experiments before GUN invaded. PLUS Towers had seen and reported Gerald making a deal with the devil (Black Doom). So like— why would GUN just suddenly decide to annihilate everyone in Project Shadow like that??? It would be one thing if they just decided to shut them down, but they were actively going in there to KILL! So like— I feel like we’re missing pieces and being mislead.

Rouge isn’t there. Which I GET because how/why would she be?? By the end of the movie, there’s definitely ways for more mobians to start appearing (Amy is a prime example). So it makes sense that Rouge isn’t there yet because it’s EARTH so how WOULD she be??? And Shadow using chaos control at the end could open ways to other worlds (like in Sonic X when Sonic went super the first time and more Mobians started arriving on earth). But there were SO MANY MOMENTS SHE WOULDVE BEEN PERFECT. So it’s a shame, but understandable. Plus, how could they have made room for Rouge when they barely had room for Shadow with all the JIM CARREY.

I’ll probably continue to add to this as I process this movie over the next few days.

[mangoshorthand]

A Hargreeves Christmas Carol | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader | Ch4

SUMMARY: Luther is the sort of idiot who goes around with a 'Merry Christmas' and a goofy smile on his lips. In your opinion, he should be roasted with his own turkey and buried with a stake of holly through his heart. Who better to teach you the error of your ways than Luther's brother, the man who holds the power of Christmases Past, Present, and Yet to Come in the palm of his hand? Info/Announcement Post

<< Read Chapter Three

Chapter Four (Rated M, 4.3k words)

The Last of the Spirits

As the living room cleared of his family, their Christmas ruined by the argument, Five succeeded in priming the briefcase. He reached out as if to take your upper arm and vanish with you into the previous evening, but you jumped out of his reach. 

“No Five. Show me the future! Show me the nuclear armageddon all this is supposed to cause. Because, based on what I just saw, this is your fault, not mine.�� 

You reached out a finger and jabbed him hard in the chest, withdrawing quickly lest he use the opportunity to grab you. 

“You’re going home,” he said, firmly.

“I am not!” you yelled, stamping your foot in frustration, “take me to the future and prove to me that you haven’t been lying for an opportunity to get in my pants!”

Five tossed his head angrily, shaking his fists at his sides in equal frustration and making the briefcase hit him hard in the leg. 

“Don’t flatter yourself” he spat, “You think I’d do all this just for that?”

And then, after a slight pause:

“You think I’d try to scare you into fucking me, is that it?

“I don’t know what to believe!” you cried. 

Five took two or three angry breaths and chewed the inside of his cheek before he responded.

“I didn’t lie to get into your pants,” he said, sounding bitter, but slightly calmer “And, technically, I didn’t lie to you at all. I never actually said you caused nuclear armageddon. I just let you believe it.”

“WHAT?”

“I said that upsetting Luther could potentially cause nuclear armageddon, which is true: actions like those can, indirectly, lead to apocalyptic events. I never actually said it did in this case, however.”

You seized a bookend off a nearby shelf and threw it at him, hard. He, of course, blinked and reappeared a short distance away, leaving the bookend to smash against the wall. 

“I guess I would have deserved that.” Five said, eyeing the bookend as it faded back into being on the bookshelf. 

“YOU FUCKING PSYCHOPATH.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, “I know I shouldn’t -”

“YOU BASTARD!”

“I know,” he replied, a pleading note in his voice now, “but if you just-”

“YOU ARE BARRED. TAKE ME HOME, AND THEN NEVER SHOW YOUR FACE IN MY BAR AGAIN. I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!”

Five held up the hand not holding the briefcase.

“Fine, okay. I get it. But will you let me explain?”

You breathed like an angry bull, your fists clenched so hard it felt like you’d never be able to relax them again, but gave a resentful nod.

“Thank you,” he said, putting the briefcase down on one of the couches and sitting on its arm, facing you. 

“I guess it was my fault. I just…I guess I tried to blame you because that was easier than facing the fact I ruined Christmas for Luther… and for everyone else.”

You let out a huff, but his face kept you from an angry expostulation for the time being, and he continued: 

“But Sloane was right. You and I are similar. We’re both kind of misanthropic: we push the people who care about us away. It might not lead to an apocalypse, but it’s hardly gonna spell good news for us in the future.”

His expression appealed to yours, and you found it hard to maintain the same level of anger as you saw the honest-to-God anxiety in his face.

“I got a second chance to live my life,” he continued, quietly, “and I’m already fucking it up. You only got one life, and I don’t want to see you fuck it up either.”

You looked back at him, at his beautiful, infuriating, and wholly sincere face. Not for the first time that night, you felt the strange urge to cry. 

What was even stranger was the urge to cry on his shoulder. 

“I think you’re right,” he said.

“About what?” you asked, frowning.

“We should go see the future. Check in on you and I in, say, ten years time? See how bad it gets?”

The idea, though you’d been fiercely advocating for it only a minute or so earlier, suddenly filled you with a thrill of uncertain horror. Perhaps it was the effect of his speech, but to have such unnatural knowledge, impossible in the normal course of things, seemed now too terrible to comprehend. 

Nevertheless, you nodded silently, your legs starting to tremble beneath you. 

“Good,” Five said, and held out his hand. 

You took it. As he ran his thumb over the back of your hand, the fear became a little more bearable. 

“I really am sorry,” he said, seriously, still holding your eyes with his.

“I'll forgive you,” you replied, and squeezed his fingers. 

He smiled softly and let your hand go, reaching behind him for the briefcase once more.

“Okay,” he said, balancing it on one knee and playing with the dials, “since it’s still my hair in the briefcase, we may as well visit me first.”

The case clicked and whirred as, with a flourish, he finished his calibration. 

“Ready to see how shit my life gets?”

He looked up at you with a grin, took your hand again, and you both vanished into the now-familiar static.

You emerged in another living room, almost as different as it was possible to be from the one you just left. It was dingy, lit by a single bulb uncovered by any sort of shade.

“Are you fuckin’ kidding me?” Five murmured, looking around disdainfully. 

You had overcome your fear for now, and you looked around the living room with interest. 

It was clean at least, but the furnishings left a lot to be desired. There was a single recliner in the center of the carpet facing a TV mounted on the wall in front of you. There was also a squashed looking chesterfield, which seemed as if it was only there for form’s sake; a vague gesture at the idea of having guests.

Other than that, there was a small table beside the recliner and a couple of IKEA-looking bookcases, each filled to the brim with books. Otherwise, the room was empty. 

“Well, I’m definitely still single.” Five said, nodding to the sparse decor slightly bitterly, “Figures.”

“Yep, it’s not great,” you confirmed, grimacing.

He glanced down at the briefcase and then around the room again.

“It’s definitely Christmas Eve,” he said, “but I guess I got nobody to put up a tree for. What would be the point?”

There was a voice from the other room and you both fell silent.

“Oh, that’s great. Tell him I say hi.” 

It was Five’s voice, and it was followed a half second later by Five himself coming into the room. 

“Really?” the Five beside you said, a mixture of disappointment and incredulity in his voice. 

The decade-older Five was wearing a pair of pajama pants, no shirt, and was sporting a chevron mustache that didn't suit him. He held a phone wedged between his ear and shoulder, and his well-abused slippers shushed against the carpet. 

He was carrying a beer in one hand and what looked like some sort of frozen dinner in the other: constituted beef packaged into steak-esque shapes was sitting on a bed of soggy green beans. On the side, there was a dump of watery potato puree masquerading as mashed. 

“This is so depressing,” Five said, cringing at the sight of himself.

“That mustache does make you look like a child molester,” you agreed.

“Thanks." 

“Mm-hm,” said the future Five, placing his sad meal on the table and settling himself in the recliner, facing away from you, “well that’s nice to hear. Did the gifts for the kids arrive...Good, good.”

He picked up the beer and took a swig, using the remote to turn on the TV and immediately mute it, flicking through the channels as he spoke on the phone. 

“Me? Oh, I’m fine. Just relaxing, you know?”

He paused in his channel surfing on a showing of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, set down the control and watched it as he continued the conversation.

“You know me, I hate Christmas … Yeah, I’m happy as hell here.”

Five winced beside you. 

“I’m guessing that’s a lie?” you murmured, looking at your Five sidelong.

“Yup,” Five said, grimly, “the only thing I hate worse than people is being alone.”

Five’s future self lifted his dinner onto his lap and speared a limp green bean onto his fork.

“How’s Luther?” he said, “Life and soul of the party, right? … Sure, sure … good for you.”

He took a few more bites of his meal, ‘uh-huh-ing’ and ‘mm-hm-ing’ occasionally at the voice on the other end of the line. 

 Well,” he said, an almost undetectable tinge of sadness in his voice now, “maybe next year.”

His tone made it so clear that he didn’t hold out much hope that you didn’t even bother conferring with the Five beside you.

“You guys got your New Years planned? … Nice, nice … do you know what everyone else is doing?”

He stayed quiet as he listened, eating some more and throwing out another mm-hm or uh-huh as the conversation required. 

“Huh?” he said, eventually. “I’ll probably hit the bars with a couple of friends. Maybe do the big countdown in Times Square or wherever.”

“I’m lying,” Five said to you, flatly.

“Yeah, yeah,” the Five in the chair continued, “well I’ll - what? … Oh. No, that’s fine. Have fun tomorrow. I gotta go now anyway … alright … yeah, Happy Christmas. Bye Vik.”

When the call ended, he put down his knife and fork for a few moments, sighed, and then lifted his eyes back to the TV and began eating once more. 

“This is what I get.” Five said dully, watching himself finish the last third of his meal. 

You looked from the Five facing away from you in the chair to the Five beside you, his expression haunted.

“But this is just a future that might be, right?” you said, half asking, half attempting to reassure him, “This isn’t set in stone.”

“If I don’t get my shit together, this is where I’ll be.”

“But you talk like you’re past all hope,” you said, bracingly, “You just have to make a change.”

“Yeah,” he said, though not sounding convinced. 

“And even if you get like this, it’s not like it’s too late to make it right! You’re, what, in your thirties here?” 

“Over eighty,” Five said. 

“Well, whatever,” you continued, “the one thing you got is time. If that Five pulled his finger out of his ass, he could go fix it. It’s not like anyone’s dead.”

As you spoke, the older Five finished his meal and began to channel surf again.

“I was alone for a very long time.” your Five said, “It does something to you.”

You watched him in silence as he continued. 

“When my brain was developing the finer points of empathy, I didn’t have anyone around to empathize with. There was nobody real to practice on while my brain was still plastic.”

You looked from him to the Five in the chair, considering him as you listened. 

“I feel like…maybe I’m doomed.” Five continued, “This is my mind’s comfort zone; nobody around to force me to be an actual human being. Nobody to challenge me, nobody to compromise for. Nobody to force me to be better by expecting more of me.”

Your attention was suddenly caught by the television.

“Uh, Five?”

“It’s like I’m stuck in this pattern of -”

“Five, seriously.”

This got his attention, and he looked at the TV in horror.

“Oh my god!” he cried, almost dropping the briefcase.

On the screen, there were two women gyrating against one another in barely-there Santa-themed lingerie. From the chair, a rhythmic shuffling sound confirmed the worst. 

Horrified, Five grabbed you by the back of your sweater, pulled you out of the room and into a sad looking bedroom. 

“I am so, so sorry!” he said, sitting down heavily on the bed and hiding his face in his hands, “I can’t believe you had to see that!”

You tried extremely hard to keep the laughter in, but a little burst bounds despite your best efforts. 

“I’m sorry,” you said back to him, looking up at you with a red, mortified face made even worse by your reaction, “I’m really sorry to laugh, I don’t want to embarrass you. It was just so unexpected!”

He hid his head in his hands again and groaned, just as the Five from the living room gave an audible groan of his own.

This was too much, and you fell into helpless giggles.

“I’m - s-so ….sorry!” you managed, struggling to speak against laughter that had you doubled over and leaning against the wall for support, “I’m not… I’m not j-judging you, it’s j-just… really f-f-f-funny!”

You struggled to get ahold of yourself, managing it with difficulty, and Five recovered himself just enough to look up at you, mortified. 

“I’m glad one of us is enjoying this at least.”

At this, all your hard work was undone and you bent double again, breathless with laughter.

“T-t-two of us are enjoying it!” you wheezed, gesturing in the direction of Five’s counterpart. 

Five’s face crumpled, but then a pained snort forced its way out, and then he was laughing too. 

“I can’t believe I masturbate to cable porn.” he said, agony in his voice, “That’s the worst part!”

You sat down beside him on the bed and put your arm around his shoulders, giggling breathlessly, his own reluctant laughter just adding to the hilarity. 

In this manner, the laughter gradually faded, and you finished up leaning against one another, still chuckling occasionally. 

Turning to him, you looked at his expression. Though he still looked amused, there was equal humiliation and misery in the lines of his face.

“Listen to me,” you said, softly, “you’re not doomed to loneliness and cable porn. You’re not… you’re not broken, maybe just a little bent.”

“Thanks,” he murmured, bowing his head and letting it rest gently against yours. 

He let out a little breath, as if he were laying down a heavy burden he knew he would have to pick up again all too soon. 

At this close quarters, you could smell that menthol scent again; eucalyptus, perhaps a hint of citrus.

And, rather like the night you wiped salt away from his chin, your body acted without your brain’s involvement. 

You pressed your lips to his scarlet temple, and then withdrew. 

Five looked surprised, and he lifted his head to look at you, only a few inches apart. 

“Thanks,” he said, again, though he mouthed it this time, the word barely articulated.

You looked at each other, caught in this strange, frozen moment. Both of you sat there, paralysed, completely unsure what might happen next.

And then, a particularly drawn out moan from the living room snapped you both back to reality. Apparently the other Five wasn’t far off finishing his visit to the land of cable porn. 

“We should go,” Five said, quickly, drawing away from you quickly and fumbling in his breast pocket for the vial containing your hair.

“Sounds good,” you said, brightly, hiding the awkwardness with jollity. 

There were a few exquisitely embarrassing moments as Five exchanged the hairs in which his older self was putting on rather the auditory show.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Five chanted as he worked, finally succeeding in slamming the DNA housing back into place and setting the briefcase.

With no preamble, he grabbed your arm and you both thankfully vanished into the ether. 

When you rematerialized, it was to find yourself in your bar on a busy night. 

“Thank God.” Five said, still bright pink.

He looked briefly down at the briefcase:

“Yep, same night.”

The bar looked relatively unchanged, though the fixtures and fittings had been upgraded at some point in the ten years that lay between you and this permutation of Maggie’s. There was the same half-assed tinsel around the window frame as the sole concession to the fact it was Christmas Eve.

On the corner table, a group of men donning Santa hats were singing an uproarious version of Jingle Bells, their drinks up over their heads and swaying in unison. 

There you were, behind the crowded bar as usual, shaking a cocktail with one hand and pulling a pint of lager with the other, working with the same, ruthless energy you always did, face hard and steely in concentration. 

Robbie was gone, it seemed, because you didn’t recognise the two employees helping to fend off the rest of the crowd of customers baying for booze and jacked up on Christmas cheer.

“This doesn’t seem fair,” Five said, “You’re doing great, but a few miles away I’m…wanking into a TV dinner like Ebenezer Splooge!”

“I look so much older,” you said, not listening and instead eyeing the first hint of crow’s feet emerging around your eyes.

“You look great,” Five said, impatiently, “This just proves that I’m the problem. You’re perfectly happy, and I'm a mess.”

He watched you almost wistfully, both envying your future and admiring your command, as he always found himself doing whenever he visited Maggie’s. You really were a sight to see behind that bar, and ten years had only added more skill. 

As another large table began to join in with the Jingle Bells guys, you said something that Five didn’t quite catch, and he tore his eyes away from the future you to look at the you beside him.

He was surprised to see tears streaming down your face.

“I’m not happy!” 

You fell against his chest and cried tears more violent than any you’d cried that night.

Five stood there, bewildered, as your desperate tears began to soak through his shirt. 

“Okay, okay,” he said, soothingly, “I’m gonna take you home, alright?”

He fiddled with the briefcase with difficulty, peering over your shoulder to set it where he held it behind your back. With a couple of pushes of buttons, he succeeded, and you were at last standing once more in your darkened living room, the high wind buffering the windows. 

Five looked briefly down at the briefcase for confirmation.

“Ten minutes after we left,” he murmured, satisfied, “Quantum suspension engaged, so no doppelganger for me. We’re good to go from here.”

This done, he lowered you both onto the couch, letting the briefcase bump down softly onto the floor. 

For a few moments, he simply held you against him, and then he shifted his grip to hold you by the shoulders in order to look into your face. 

“What’s wrong?” he asked, “Why did seeing that make you cry?”

You shook your head and closed your eyes to weep once more, sobs overtaking you.

“Hey,” Five said, shaking you gently, “given all the shit you've seen about me tonight, you can at least tell me that!”

When this didn’t yield the desired result, he sighed and pulled you back against his shoulder.

“Okay, cry it out for now, but I’m not leaving until you tell me.”

You did cry it out, sniffling against his pure white shirt without a worry for how much you might be ruining it. Right now, he felt warm and safe. His was the only comfort you could imagine taking as waves of revelation broke upon you. 

His was the only comfort you could take, you realized.

Many of your bridges were burned, others had simply rotted away from lack of maintenance, and others yet had been severed by the loss of the other side. The end result was the same: you were very short on bridges. 

In truth, Luther, Robbie, and Five’s bridges were probably the only three you had left.

Luther had maintained his well, without your help, yet earlier today you’d launched a Molotov cocktail at it, leaving it in danger of burning down if you didn’t take action.

Robbie’s was a thin and sickly little bridge, barely a bridge at all. It could have been stronger, you knew, if only you’d allowed him to build as he wanted. 

And Five’s? Right now, it was the only one that could support your weight. It was untested before tonight, yet it was standing firm beneath your feet.

“I’m not happy,” you repeated, when your sobs had subsided enough to allow you to speak, “I haven’t been happy for a long, long time.”

Five’s arms tightened around you.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured.

“Ever since my grandma died. I’ve felt…”

You broke, took a couple of breaths, and tried a different way of explaining it. 

“I looked at myself behind that bar, and I realized I have no idea who that woman is.”

Five nodded slowly, though you could tell he didn’t really understand. 

“I don’t know who I am. I don’t know what I want. I just know that I don’t want to be her in ten years’ time.”

“Why?” he asked.

“Because she’s exactly the same as I am now!”

Five gave another of those slow nods, processing. 

“Tell me if I’m way off base,” he said, tentatively, as if he’d just drawn a tenuous red line between points in his mind, “your grandma died, and you took over Maggie’s immediately, right? When you were twenty one?”

“Yes.”

“Do you think that maybe you threw yourself into managing the place to avoid… actually grieving her?”

You made a small, wounded noise, a fresh wave of tears descended, and you nodded against his chest.

He reclined on the couch, taking you with him as he fumbled behind you to pull a blanket over you. It was warm, comforting, and it made you cry harder in relief.

“Maggie’s was never your baby,” he said, softly, “it was hers.”

You nodded.

“Do you even like running it?”

You shook your head, admitting it for the first time with a shuddering outward breath.

“Everything she did for me. I can’t just let that go. That bar was everything to her.”

Five shook his head.

“You think she gave you that bar so that you could chain yourself to it?”

“No.”

“Then sell it.”

“No!”

“Well, then find something in the middle!” 

You sniffled and took a few moments to regain some composure. 

“I don’t like managing the bar, but I like mixology. When I make cocktails, it reminds me of her and it feels good.”

“Then stick with mixology and ditch the rest,” he said, as if it were obvious.

You shook your head.

“I can’t let her down. If - if I don’t make it a success then… then I’ll be proving she was wrong to trust me with it.”

“Sounds like you got your thinking backwards to me,” Five scoffed. 

“What do you mean?”

“You said she always fought for you, right?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re acting like she raised you just to make sure there would be someone around to make Maggie’s a success. Seems more likely that she worked her ass off in the bar to make sure she could leave something behind for you.”

You couldn’t help but see the logic in this, but still, something niggled:

“The bar’s her legacy. I can’t abandon it.”

“You’re her legacy, idiot.”

His logic had done little to dispel your doubts, but this emotional truth smashed through them with the force of a wrecking ball. 

You remembered her twinkling at you at fifteen as she taught you to make your first margaria, you remembered her beaming with pride when you first made a cosmo by heart, and you remembered her on her deathbed, pressing her rhinestone necklace into your hand and telling you how proud she was, how successful you’d be. 

You remembered her taking her in your arms and making you feel safe while your parents screamed. 

It wasn’t the bar, it was you. It was always you. 

And you were crying once more: hot, cleansing, healing tears.

“I miss her,” you hiccuped against Five’s chest. 

“I know,” he said, stroking your hair.

For the next several minutes, you cried yourself dry. And then you felt better. 

“I’m sorry,” you said, slightly hoarsely, “I cried all over your shirt.”

“I don’t mind,” Five said.

In truth, he could have stayed there all night with you in his arms, wet shirt or not. You stopping crying was bittersweet: your grief was over, but it meant that soon he’d have to stir himself, say his goodbyes and probably never touch you like this ever again. 

“Can I get you a nightcap?” you asked. 

“Sure.”

You extracted yourself from him and looked on the kitchen shelf that stored your private booze. 

“Tequila shot?” you asked him, with a mischievous grin. 

“Perfect,” he smiled back.

God, the pain your little grin caused him. Like a knife to his stomach. 

You returned to the couch with two shots of tequila and held one out to him. He took it with thanks, and you sat down again. 

Five raised his glass.

“To Maggie,” he said.

“To you,” you countered, “the man who said he didn’t have enough empathy.”

Five chuckled, and you clinked your glasses together before throwing them back, revelling in the heat as it went down. 

“I’d better take my leave,” Five said, when he’d recovered from the shot.

You nodded, and you both stood.

“For what it’s worth,” he said, “I’d like you to come for Christmas tomorrow. But no pressure. I’m going to do things differently on my end this time, and none of that’s on you.”

“Thank you,” you said.

He bent, picked up the briefcase, and you followed him to your apartment door. There, he turned to look at you and held out his hand once more.

“Happy Holidays,” you said, solemnly, taking his outstretched hand.

Five raised your linked hands to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss to the back of yours.

“Happy Holidays,” he replied, and left.

Read Chapter Five >> (Final chapter coming Christmas Eve!) I FEED OFF COMMENTS AND REBLOGS YUM YUM YUM

The Last of the Spirits — The Pointing Finger by John Leech, 1843 in Dickens' A Christmas Carol, first edition (1843).

Dickens' A Christmas Carol full text available here.

Read it! It's a much better than this, and you can see how many lines I stole verbatim or clumsily referenced.

Dividers used in this series by @bernardsbendystraws (garland) and @strangergraphics (lights) My husband (Mr Mango) also wishes it to be known that he came up with Ebenezer Splooge. It was him, it was him, it was all him! Here he is, at the bottom, where he belongs.

Taglist: @nevbrooke-555, @fiannee, @abeeabee6969, @chalametabingbong, @lolawassad, @icantpickanamefromonefandom @thebearmage @kaybreezy3000, @starlitflora (comment to be added or removed)

Megalist

Request info + rules

I take Five requests, I'm fairly versatile in what I write (fluff, smut, angst, psychological character study- I'll try it all) but I will consider them on a case by case basis. See request info + rules for request status and more.

[sarahsangelicdoll]

ohhh ml this is so good !! The writing was immaculate and story interesting 🤭 would’ve absolutely loved this even if there was no smut, also think i’m officially OBSESSED with boyfriends dad Rafe 💞

“once he found out he was having Caleb he refused to be like him. He built his own construction company from the ground up and worked odd jobs to get to that point so his son would never want for anything.”

i swear i absolutely LOVE dad Rafe, not only is he now mature but the thought of him completely changing his ways for his son is both adorable and simply hot(be a good father it’s hot)

“He’s only wearing a tight white tee that’s just as dirty as the rest of him, his broad chest and thick arms on display.”

imagining it is not enough i need an actual image

“Rafe runs his hand over his head turning sideways under the guise of having to stretch but really he’s hiding the little smile that you keep seeming to bring to his face.”

ok cutie i see you 🤭🤭

“Rafe’s sleepy voice says your name and you can’t help but wonder if that’s how he’d sound moaning in your ear while he pounds his - you’ve gotta stop.”

y/ns so real for that

“You turn his way and rest your palms on the marble countertop he built himself and it almost makes your tits spill out of what little material is covering them. He’s going to lose it.”

now why is y/n lowk kind of cute.. 🤭🤭 bonus

“He sends you another sad glance before walking inside, leaving you alone with Rafe.”

but does he feel bad for cheating or for getting caught is the question

““Yeah?” You glance over your shoulder at him with that mischievous look you always flash him in your eyes and a naughty little smirk painted on your lips. “Do you fucking worst, daddy.””

ok y/n stop this is supposed to be a Rafe fic but you’re getting me distracted 😔✋✋

““Don’t worry, doll. I’m gonna give you the best dick of your fucking life. But first, I’ve gotta taste this god damn pussy.” Rafe admires the growing bruises and the bite mark on your plump ass before grabbing your cheeks and spreading you open so he can run his tongue along your slit to your pulsing clit.”

men who aren’t afraid to eat pussy and enjoy it are so fucking hot

““Quit wiggling and let me devour this pussy, brat. Be a good girl and stay still for daddy, yeah?” Rafe mumbles against your pussy, the vibrations sending your eyes to the back of your skull. “Need you to cum for me, baby.””

eooof yes sir anything you say 🤭🤭

“He grabs your hand with his free one and presses it against our belly where you can feel his cock bulging from inside you. “Feel that? You’re so fuckin’ full of me.””

size kink is going brrr, especially when you remember that this guy is 6’2 😵‍💫

“Rafe flips you onto your back and grips onto the back of your thighs as he kneels on the couch in front of you so he can pound into you harder and deeper than ever.”

couch sex with this position just does sum to me and i can’t explain it, but nevertheless i am such a slut for this position

also feel like saying that while reading this i can not help but imagine Caleb as Timothee Chalamet lmao

but this fic is immediately going into my faves and i am officially a slut for boyfriends dad Rafe 🎀

Buy Me Presents ⟡˖ Boyfriends!Dad!Rafe x reader ⟡˖

𐙚 Your boyfriend sucks. But his dad? Well, he’s not so bad…𐙚

(Heavily inspired by the book “Birthday girl” by Penelope Douglas and the song “Buy Me Presents” by Sabrina Carpenter. It’s my lil bday gift to myself. Shout out my luv @cameronwillow for beta reading for me.)

Age gap(Rafe is early 40s Reader is mid 20s), Rafe is your Bf’s dad (duh! It’s the whole plot), Reader has a tramp stanp and nipple piercings, Male masterbation, Mutual pining(so so much pining), Thoughts of cheating, Actual cheating (not by Rafe or R), Jealousy/possessiveness Spanking, Pussy eating, Unprotected sex, Biting, Choking, Size kink, She’s a looong one, buckle up!! 18+MDNI!!

You love your boyfriend, you really do. And he isn’t a bad boyfriend. He just isn’t necessarily a good boyfriend either. The easiest way to put it is that he’s neglectful. In every sense of the word. It’s not out of character for him to forget to pick you up from your late night shifts at the bar you work at. He is constantly forgetting your plans, or just flat out ditching them in favor of hanging out with his friends. He never cleans up after himself unless you ask, and even then the chances are slim that he will actually do it. You’re pretty sure he doesn’t even know how to turn on the dryer. Why would he need to? He knows if he leaves the piles of dirty laundry long enough you’ll get sick of it and wash them yourself. And last but certainly not least, he is the least financially responsible person you’ve ever met. He misses work to the point where he gets fired from every job he’s ever had. He spends all his money on partying and eating out. And now? He’s screwed you out of your apartment that he hardly even pays for since he’s always late on bills.

He decided that having a fucking rager on a Tuesday night in your small apartment complex instead of picking you up from your double shift was a bright idea. You ended up having to get an uber home, which you absolutely couldn’t afford and by the time you made it home your place was trashed and your boyfriend was out front being hauled into a cop car. Apparently when your landlord asked him to shut the party down he got all agro and started screaming and arguing that it was his house and he can be as loud as he wants. And when your landlord didn’t agree? He punched him in the face. So he called the cops and they took him down to the station to cool off. This wasn’t the first time he was asked to break up a party like this, but it was the last. Your landlord evicted him and even though he hardly paid you still couldn’t afford it without even that small amount of help.

He ended up calling his dad from the police station to come bail him out and of course he did. He always does. That’s why Caleb Cameron can’t account for a single goddamn thing in his life, he always has daddy’s money to bail him out. That’s why you are where you are now, staying with his dad, for the foreseeable future. After Mr. Cameron bailed Caleb out, he offered you both a place to stay at his house. His nice house that he built. Which you of course tried to decline.

But after much convincing from both Cameron men, you agreed to move in while you save money to get another place on your own. His dad doesn’t need help with any of the bills but he asked that you and Caleb keep up on the chores and take turns making dinner every night. You’ve been here for a few weeks now and so far you’ve been doing everything. Caleb hasn’t even picked up a single sock off the ground.

Mr. Cameron or “Rafe” as he’s asked you to call him several times now, isn’t bad. He’s been very kind and generous to you since the moment you met him. Which wasn’t until the other day. Caleb never wanted to introduce you to him. You’ve seen him around and of course you know of Rafe Cameron, this island isn’t very big. But from what you can tell their relationship isn’t the best so you’ve never actually had a conversation with him up until now.

He’s been easy to coexist with though. He’s surprisingly low maintenance. Rafe spends most of his day working with the guys on his construction team and then he comes home and showers. If you aren’t working a late shift you always have dinner ready. He comes downstairs in fresh sweats and pops open a beer. Then you, him, and Caleb all eat together. At least you’re supposed to, Caleb was only here the first night you moved in, he’s spent every other night out. Leaving you and his dad to eat dinner together alone.

Tonight is one of those nights. Caleb went out to the bar with his friends, even after you told him you were making his favorite dinner for him. He left before it was even done. Rafe will be home anytime now though. You’ve noticed he’s usually home around five thirty so you have dinner ready and kept warm by five. You made chicken parmesan from scratch and it’s in the oven set to warm while you sit at the shiny marble kitchen island, doom scrolling on your phone. You hear a key in the lock and you hate that ears perk up. The door opens and you hear keys being dropped in a glass bowl before footsteps sound toward the kitchen. It takes him a few seconds to come into view because you also hear him unlacing his work boots, but when he does? You can’t stand that your stomach swoops at the sight of him.

Not only is Rafe generous, successful, cleans up after himself without being asked, he’s always on time and he always asks how your day is. He’s fucking gorgeous. His piercing blue eyes make your skin heat each time they’re on you. His messy mullet seems like he’s been cutting it for years, which there’s just something charming about. Like he could have someone do it for him but he’d rather just do it himself because it’s cheaper and easier. Not that he’s hurting for money. His dad might have cut him off and left him with nothing but once he found out he was having Caleb he refused to be like him. He built his own construction company from the ground up and worked odd jobs to get to that point so his son would never want for anything. His personality just makes him even more frustratingly sexy. It doesn’t help that his thick arms that always seem like they’re going to burst out of his t-shirts are covered in tattoos and his smile, god his smile, it gives you butterflies from your stomach down to your pussy. He always looks particularly edible when he gets off work though.

“Hey, Caleb here?” Rafe walks into the kitchen wearing dirty work jeans and a carhartt coat, his face has a few smudges on it and he really tests your strength when he pulls the jacket off. He’s only wearing a tight white tee that’s just as dirty as the rest of him, his broad chest and thick arms on display. You feel like you’re going to go insane when he reaches up to run his fingers through his hair and it causes his shirt to ride up and show a sliver of waist. You finally pull your eyes away from his body to meet his own and he has a brow raised in your direction. God, how long have you been ogling him? Hopefully he didn’t notice. Fuck.

“Oh, uh- no, he went out.” You let out a small sigh and shrug your shoulders trying to play it off like you don’t care. Like you didn’t make his favorite meal because you’ve hardly had any time together recently. Like you didn’t hope you could eat together then snuggle up and watch a movie together, maybe fuck. But apparently whatever party he went to tonight held priority over his own girlfriend.

“Mmm, he seems to go out a lot, huh?” Rafe chuckles and his lips quirk into a small smile but you can see the sadness in his eyes. Caleb is avoiding him and you both know that. But it’s not like him ditching you to go out is a new occurrence. “Well, I’m gonna go shower.”

“Kay, dinner is ready whenever you’re done. I waited to eat.” You don’t respond to his question about Caleb, you both know the answer, it doesn’t need to be said. His eyes linger on you for a moment and you don’t miss the way they flash to your thighs in your little sleep shorts momentarily before he turns and exits the room. You hate that just the smallest attention from him has your skin tingling. You’re just lonely, that’s all it is. He’s your boyfriend’s dad, you can’t have a crush on him. It’s just a fleeting attraction. You’re not blind, the man is walking sex. And it’s been almost two weeks since you’ve been fucked.

Around twenty minutes later Rafe comes downstairs and grabs his beer like he always does. Then he wanders into the dining room where you have the table set with dinner dished up. There’s an empty plate in front of the chair beside you in case Caleb decides to come home. But you know he won’t. Which makes it all the more hard to not drool over the way his dad is wearing grey sweatpants and a tight black tank top like it isn’t the sluttiest outfit a man could possibly wear.

Rafe could say the same about you though, sitting there in your little pajama shorts and a cropped tank top with a tiny zip up hoodie that you have unzipped halfway so it’s hanging off one of your shoulders. Smiling up at him from his dining room table that has never been set a day in its life up until you moved in with a warm meal prepared for him after a long day. It’s something he’s always wanted, someone to come home to, someone that cooks him meals that aren’t take-out or from the microwave. And he hates how sweet and full of life you are. He hates it because he loves it. You blast music and dance around while you clean. You bring the kind of noise to this house that was otherwise so quiet sometimes he felt like any sound he made bounced off the walls. And you’re so fucking pretty it almost hurts.

Especially because he can never have you. Not only is he old enough to be your father, you’re his son’s girlfriend for fucks sake. But that doesn’t mean he can’t enjoy your presence. Especially if Caleb isn’t going to. He loves his son with all his heart but just in the short time you’ve been here he’s noticed he isn’t very attentive with you. He wishes that didn’t disappoint him and also fill him with something that is tinged with jealousy that he pushes away immediately. He just doesn’t like to see his son taking a woman like you for granted. If he had someone like you? He’d worship at her feet and do anything he could to make her happy. He really needs to find a way to control these thoughts he’s been having about you because it seems like they intensify the more time he spends around you and he can’t let a small attraction that he can tuck away in the back of his mind become anything bigger than that. Not with you. He’s just getting older and more lonely every year and you’re beautiful, easy to talk to, and living in his house, wearing those little tank tops and tight yoga pants. It’s just some minor lust, that’s all.

“I made chicken parm and there’s uh - mashed potatoes and sauteed veggies.” You gesture to the food on his plate as he sits down in the chair across from you.

“Thanks, looks good.” Rafe clears his throat and cuts a piece of chicken from his plate, bringing it between his lips with a groan that has you clenching your thighs. “Damn, that’s delicious. This is Caleb’s favorite, right?”

“Oh, uh, yeah. I’m sorry he’s not here.” You sigh and look down at your plate, pushing some food around with your fork. Mentioning the lack of your boyfriend’s presence has another wave of disappointment washing over you. You’re starting to wonder why you even get your hopes up anymore.

“You don’t need to apologize for him, he’s a grown man.” Rafe’s expression hardens slightly, he can’t help it. You made Caleb his favorite dinner and he flaked on you? Not only is he disappointed as his father but he also can’t believe any man would take your sweet gestures for granted. He’d die to have someone be this attentive with him. “I’m sorry he isn’t here.”

“Ha! He’s a grown man, you don’t need to apologize for him.” You throw his words back at him with a smirk and it makes him chuckle, the tension in the air starting to dissipate.

“Well, you got me there.” Rafe runs his hand over his head turning sideways under the guise of having to stretch but really he’s hiding the little smile that you keep seeming to bring to his face. Rafe thinks it might be a little too giddy to be coming from your boyfriend’s dad.”For what it’s worth, this is really good, thank you. I appreciate you cooking.”

“Yeah, no problem, just paying my dues.” It’s your turn to pretend to stretch. The words he said were so simple, but to you, they held so much meaning. To be appreciated for something you do, isn’t something you get very often. “I’m - um- I’m glad you like it.”

“Yeah it’s really good.” He pokes the veggies on his plate with his fork and gives them a look of disdain that has you hiding a chuckle behind your hand. You’ve noticed he tends to eat around the healthy stuff you serve him. “But I could do without these veggies though.”

“I’ll make a healthy eater out of you, you’ll see.” You give him a playful glare that he returns with a smile he doesn’t bother to hide this time. “It’ll be good for your heart, old man.”

“Wow! I am not that old.” Rafe brings his hand to his chest in mock offense and it sends you both into a fit of laughter.

“Mhm, whatever you say old man. Let me know if you need help getting up the stairs after dinner!” You lean forward on your elbows and laugh and it takes every bit of willpower Rafe has to not linger on the way your tits bounce at your motions.

“You’re funny, I like talking to you.” You hate that the way he says that makes your body heat because you know he doesn’t mean it like that. And you shouldn’t want him to.

You really need to stop relying on Caleb for rides. This is the third time now that he’s forgotten to pick you up from your two AM shifts and you don’t really have many other options. Your coworkers already left you to lock up for the night, your sister isn’t answering her phone and you’ve never been able to rely on your dad for a single thing in your life. You wish you had friends to call. Or money to get your own car. You groan and throw your head back in frustration when your boyfriend’s phone goes to voicemail for the fifth time. You could call an uber but you’re really trying to save money to get out of Rafe’s hair sooner rather than later. Rafe, he would pick you up. But do you even want to call him? He’s definitely asleep, since he gets up at the crack of dawn everyday for work and do you really want to open that door?

The two of you have been getting along really well the last few weeks, settling into coexisting with one another. You honestly spend more time with him than you do your boyfriend at this point but he’s already done so much for you and you aren’t sure if you want to push it. You could sleep here, on the couch in the office and hopefully Caleb will get back to you by morning. But you really want to take a shower. And if you uber it’s really just setting you back on saving so in the long run it’s going to put Rafe out even more anyway. Fuck it. You click on his contact and it only rings twice before he answers.

“Hello?” Rafe’s sleepy voice says your name and you can’t help but wonder if that’s how he’d sound moaning in your ear while he pounds his - you’ve gotta stop. “Everything okay?”

“Hi, Rafe.” You take in a shaky breath, god you hate asking people for help. “Um, everything is okay, it’s just - is Caleb home?”

“Is he not with you? I thought he was picking you up tonight.” You hear rustling, like he’s getting up out of bed. “He’s not here. He hasn’t been home since this morning unless he came home when I was at work. Are you okay?”

“No, uh - he’s not with me.” You clear your throat and let out a dry, half hearted, chuckle. “He was supposed to pick me up, he must’ve just gotten caught up, maybe his phone died or something. I can’t get ahold of him could you -”

“I’m coming to get you. Stay inside, keep the doors locked.” You hear his belt clanking as he hurriedly gets dressed on the other side of the line. “I’ll be there in ten.”

Seven minutes later you hear Rafe’s pick-up idling outside and your phone is dinging with a text that he’s here. You aren’t sure how it's possible that he got here so fast, considering his house is in a nice suburb outside figure eight and the bar you work at is on the cut, but you don’t question it. You lock up the bar, walk over to the curb, and hop in Rafe’s truck.

“Hey, I’m so sorry. I didn’t have anyone else to call and -” Rafe chuckles but it’s not one of those charming ones you’ve come to know, he seems irritated and now you really wish you would’ve just slept in the bar.

“Don’t, be sorry.” Rafe shakes his head as he puts the truck into gear and pulls off toward his house. “I’m sorry that my son left you hanging like that.”

“Oh, it’s okay.” You wave your hand and try to brush it off with a smile, maybe ease some of the tension. But Rafe’s hands just tighten on the steering wheel causing his knuckles to whiten and he breathes out hard through his nose. Maybe you really fucked up by calling him.

“No. It’s not. It’s unacceptable.” Rafe grits out. He’s trying to not be unreasonably angry but the way he’s watched his son basically neglect you has been grinding his gears more and more everyday. And now he forgets you at one of the sketchiest bars in town in the middle of the night? You were alone, it seems like your coworkers already left. Anyone could have decided to try and break in, what would you have done if he didn’t come?

He hates that it makes him feel animosity toward Caleb, that jealous feeling that’s tinged with possession growing more and more the longer he’s around you. He would never forget you. If it was up to him you wouldn’t work in that bar at all and he’d take care of all your needs and desires. Rafe is old school, he wants a pretty woman to come home to, to cook for him and let him eat her pussy every night before bed. Someone who will keep him in check and make him laugh when it counts. The way the two of you have been living together kind of feels like that, excluding the sex parts. Lines are starting to blur for him and maybe he just really needs to get laid. It’s been over a year now.

“If you ever need a ride, call me. I’ll be there.” You don’t argue, there’s no point. This man is as stubborn as you and if you try and disagree you’ll just go back and forth till one of you caves. And you have a feeling it would be you. His voice holds a finality that just has you nodding in agreement before the two of you fall into comfortable silence for the rest of the drive.

Okay, Rafe seriously needs to get laid. He feels like he’s living in a never ending intro to a porno. He isn’t sure if he’s ever been more thankful or if he regrets ever putting that in the ground hot tub out back but he feels like he’s being tortured. It’s mid November so the pool is covered but the hot tub is free game and you’ve definitely been taking advantage of that. He should be glad, it’s the first time it’s getting real use since he built it but the fact that you go in it nearly every day means you’re in a bikini nearly everyday.

You have a few different ones but the one you’re wearing right now while you walk through the kitchen. You have a pink towel that you definitely brought with you from home thrown over your shoulder and the little platform slides you’re wearing are the only other thing on your body. The baby pink straps of the bikini hug your curves perfectly. The little triangles barely cover more than your nipples and he can see that they’re pierced through the thin material. The bottoms are practically a thong, showing off that little angel wing tramp stamp tattooed on your lower back. Hardly something you think that a girl would wear around her boyfriend’s dad, but he’s starting to think you’re doing it on purpose.

Things have been different between the two of you this last week. Caleb went on a ski trip with his friends and didn’t even bother to invite you. It’s not like they’re your friends, anyway. So it’s just been you and Rafe for the last five days. There was a night that the two of you ordered chinese food and you showed him what a “christmas horror movie” is. Which he really enjoyed. He’s not huge on movies but he can’t deny that he loves a good horror movie.

You laughed and joked together. Playfully teased each other over your food orders and ended up just ordering twice as much food. You both sat maybe just a little too close and your arms brushed every once in a while. It was almost like you both got more brave after that, letting glances linger a little longer than necessary. His hand on the small of your back when he passes the kitchen. Flirty banter. And your outfits somehow seem to be getting smaller and smaller by the day.

His cock pulses as he watches you bend over in your little swimsuit to grab a water bottle out of the fridge and he doesn’t advert his gaze fast enough because when you stand up straight and look over your shoulder at him there’s this mischievous little glint in your eyes and a smug smirk painted on your lips. You turn his way and rest your palms on the marble countertop he built himself and it almost makes your tits spill out of what little material is covering them. He’s going to lose it.

“You gonna get in with me yet, old man? Or are you still too boring?” You tilt your head to the side with a bright smile and your voice is so saccharine he feels like he’s gonna get a goddamn toothache. He can’t go in the hot tub with you though, his control is slipping more and more everyday and being that close to you, wet, in that bikini, seems like a recipe for disaster.

“Guess I’m still too boring, little girl.” Your little ongoing inside joke of teasing each other about your ages makes him chuckle because he’s not really old, he’s only forty two. And you’re certainly not a little girl, you’re a sexy young woman. Too sexy. And too sweet and thoughtful. And you’re fucking funny and quirky. And he hates how bad he wants you.

It’s getting harder to chalk it up to lust the more time he spends alone with you. But he still has hope that he’s just lonely and horny because he can’t like you, you’re his son’s girlfriend for god's sake. Even if Caleb doesn’t treat you like you’re even his girlfriend at all. He’s barely seen him the entire time you’ve lived here. He’ll hit up one of his old booty calls tomorrow, it’s saturday and every woman on this island is just dying for a chance with Rafe Cameron. The only problem is he doesn’t like any of them. He doesn’t have to like them as people to get this pent up energy out though.

“Suit yourself, have fun being old and boring.” You shrug and send him a wink. You let your eyes travel from his face down his body before turning on your heel toward the door. He holds in a groan at the sight of your hips swinging, your ass jiggling in that tiny material. He was already half hard but that sent him over the edge. He needs to take a cold fucking shower.

Rafe runs his hands through his hair, letting the cool water cascade down his back. He lets out an exasperated sigh because truly this isn’t doing shit. He’s fucking cold, still hard, and he can’t stop thinking about what would happen if he did go in the hot tub with you. Was it just a friendly invitation because he built it and you think he needs to relax more? You definitely think that, but the look you gave him said there was more to it than that. The look in your eyes always does. Like you’re saying something to him without saying it and he’s pretty sure he looks at you the same way. It can never be more than just teasing, more than walking that line. You’re off limits and he knows that. But that doesn’t stop him from wanting you and what nobody but him knows can’t hurt, right?

Rafe lets his mind wander. He imagines what it would be like if he took you up on your offer. He’d get in with you and sit as far away from you as you could. You’d probably talk because even though Rafe isn’t a big talker, it seems to come easy with you. He thinks about the way the water would make your tits float in that little top and how little tendrils of your hair would fall free from that clip you have in and stick to your skin. He can see that little cheshire smirk you always give him and that mischievous look in your eyes is just straight up naughty now as his mind has you inching closer to him by the second.

You’d press yourself against him, your beautiful tits that he knows are probably so soft pressed up against his arm as you look at him with pouty lips and tell him how bad you want him. He’d grab your hips and pull you into his lap to straddle him and wandering hands would turn into heated kisses while you grind down on his cock. He would finally take that top off and get to see your tits, grab them, suck them.

Rafe grabs his throbbing cock and squeezes the base before pumping it in his hand. He groans in his chest as his head falls and his fantasy continues. In his mind his hand travels between your legs and pushes your bikini bottoms to the side, rubbing your clit a few times before thrusting two fingers knuckle deep in your wet pussy. You’d let out the prettiest moans while he pushes you to the edge with his fingers. And then you’d beg for his cock and he’d fuckig give it to you. The pace of his hand on his cock picks up and his breaths grow shallow as he imagines his hand is you, sliding his dick into your wet heat while you moan his name. You start to ride him and Rafe feels his stomach tighten. The imaginary you’s tits bounce beautifully in his face and it has his cock throbbing in his hand as he spills cum down his wrist.

He pants, the you filled haze he was in starting to fade as he comes down from his high. He turns and washes himself while he tries to shake the regret setting in. He really needs to get you out of his system.

You sigh as you use a damp towel to wipe down the bar, going through the motions of your closing duties. Caleb got home from his ski trip today and you wish you were more excited. You haven’t seen him yet since he got back while you were at work but he’s supposed to pick you up tonight. You told your sister you might need a ride, just in case. You hate that you feel like you can’t rely on him anymore. It wasn’t always like this, he used to be attentive and loving toward you, you used to be best friends. As time went on though, he got comfortable and lazy until it got to this point. You used to get butterflies and count down the seconds until you saw your boyfriend again and right now your stomach just feels like it’s filled with a pit of snakes.

He left you for an entire week, without even so much as an invitation because “he figured you wouldn’t want to go”. He left you the entire week alone in the house with his dad and if you and Rafe didn’t get along so well that would’ve been incredibly awkward. God, Rafe. You hate that the snakes in your stomach start to morph into butterflies at the thought of him. But the instant guilt that washes over you has another round of snakes swallowing the fluttering bugs whole.

These thoughts and feelings you’ve been having toward Rafe have only increased more and more over the last week. You’ve had fun with him. He’s easy to be around and surprisingly funny. You’ve grown comfortable around him and adjusted easily to living in the same space as him. Maybe a little too comfortable. You made yourself cum to the thought of him twice in a row last night. It was the first time you gave in and let your mind wander there but you haven’t cum as hard as you did in a long time. He’s just so fucking sexy and there for you. You’re just lonely, that’s all. At least that’s what you keep trying to tell yourself.

Despite your lack of faith in him, Caleb did end up picking you up from work and he even stopped at your favorite dinner for late night fries and milkshakes like you used to. You laughed together and you remembered how hot he was. His wavy blonde hair, his soft green eyes and charming, boyish smile. It’s almost like you forgot what he looks like from how little you’ve been around him lately. Everything felt better than it has in a while. Not great, but good. You had hope that maybe you and him could get back to normal up until he had you on your back with your legs spread.

Caleb isn’t bad in bed, he’s not the best ever but he’s always satisfied you. He doesn’t go down on you as much as you’d like and no matter how much you ask he won’t be rough with you but the sex isn’t bad. Tonight though? No matter what you did you couldn’t get out of your head. You usually love the way Caleb shoves his face in your neck and moans in your ear but something about it just felt like he was trying to avoid looking at you and the weight of his body as he thrusted deep into you almost felt suffocating. You were wet, you wanted to cum, but your brain wouldn’t let you. That was until Rafe’s face flashed into your mind and no matter how hard you tried to push him out it was like he barricaded himself there. You imagined it was him on top of you instead and it’s embarrassing how fast you came after that. Caleb wasn’t far behind you, spilling into the condom before pulling out of you and rolling over on his back. That was another thing, you were on birth control and no matter how much you begged him to cum inside you he wouldn’t. He said “it wasn’t worth the risk.” He fell asleep shortly after that and even though it was almost four in the morning you couldn’t shut your mind off. So you get out of bed and wander downstairs to the kitchen for a midnight snack.

You nearly jump out of your skin when you round the kitchen corner to see Rafe sitting at the island. Your hands fly up to cover your chest on instinct because all you’re wearing is a tiny silk nightie. You didn’t expect him to be up. God, did he hear you?

“Rafe! Hi! You scared the shit out of me.” You let out a breathy laugh and try to act normal. Your hands find the hem of your nightgown and tug, willing it to cover more of your ass. But that only pulls it further down your tits and the way Rafe is looking at you right now is making you want to melt into the ground. He’s never looked at you so hungrily but he also looks kind of pissed off. “I didn’t expect you to be up, sorry!”

“Huh, well, I couldn’t sleep.” Any hope that he didn’t hear you diminishes in that moment. “If you’re going to get railed under my roof at three in the morning the least you can do is try and be quiet.”

“I-” Your entire body warms and your words get caught in your throat. He really just went right out with it, didn’t he? He couldn’t just pretend it didn’t happen like a normal person? “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah? Me too.” Rafe chuckles almost condescendingly. “I have to be up for work in an hour and I’ve spent the last forty five minutes listening to your fake moans until you finally came.”

“Mr. Cameron.” You gasp at the brashness of his words. Why does he sound like a jealous boyfriend and not someone who’s angry at a loss of sleep? “I don’t think that’s really appropriate… I’m sorry if we woke you up but-”

“No.” Rafe’s tone makes your body tingle with anxiety and something else you try not to dwell on as you watch him push himself up from his seat and round the kitchen island in a few strides. He stops only inches in front of you, his large frame looming over you. It’s only now you realize he’s in nothing but a pair of black, low to the hips sweatpants and it’s blindingly apparent that he isn’t wearing any underwear. “You know what’s inappropriate? Moaning so loud your boyfriend’s dad can hear you from down the hall… Or is that what you wanted?”

He drops his voice to a low whisper at the last part and you’re completely stunned by his words. Especially because he’s not wrong. A small part of you hoped he’d hear you. You didn’t expect this reaction though. Your words are caught in your throat for a minute too long and you know the way you’re looking up at him with your thighs clenched and your eyes blown wide gives you away. And when he smirks down at you, you know you’re caught.

“It is, isn’t it?” Rafe leans down further into your personal space, his plush lips just barely grazing the shell of your ear. “Naughty girl.”

Your heart feels like it’s going to beat out of your chest and you’re at a complete loss for words. You’re starting to think you fell asleep and you’re dreaming. Rafe pulls back, his eyes feel like they’re setting your skin on fire as he looks down at you like he wants to bend you over this counter right now. But, he doesn’t. His large hand grazes your shoulder as he reaches out to push your hair back and after giving you a final once over from head to toe he takes a few backwards steps before turning on his heel and going up the stairs. What the fuck just happened?

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You can’t believe Rafe is here and with Hollis Robinson, of all people. Her being here isn’t irregular, she comes in here every week to hang all over the different blue collar men. You guess she’s just trying to go for something the opposite of her last husband, midlife crisis and all that. But why does she have to be here with him. There’s no way he didn’t agree to come here just to piss you off. At first you weren’t sure if he just had a naturally flirty nature and maybe you were just thinking too much into it because like you’ve been beating into your own head you’re just lonely. But after last night in the kitchen? And now this? You’re starting to think there’s more to it.

Especially since you want to walk over there and claw Hollis’ eyes out of her skull for how she’s looking at him. And the way he keeps looking over at you over her shoulder with a smug fucking grin painted on his face says a lot. This is payback for last night and if he wants to play that game? You’ll bite. You pull your tiny black tank top even further down, revealing the top of your red bra and you pull up your low rise jeans up slightly more on your hips so they hug your ass. You make sure your tattoo is still on display though, you’ve noticed him looking at it.

“Can I get you guys a refill?” You lean down and rest your palms on the table with a wide smile on your face and you can’t help but press your elbows together to show off your tits even more. The charming smile Rafe was throwing Hollis’ way falls the minute he lays eyes on you. He came here in hopes of riling you up and gauging your reaction to see if this was all in his head but now he’s the one feeling like clawing someone’s eyes out.

He’s picked you up a few times but he’s never come inside the bar and he can’t believe that this is where you work. It’s not particularly dirty but it’s definitely a dive bar, the kind of place guys like him and bikers on the road stop for a beer. If he was the kind of guy that went to bars, that is. But what’s really getting to him is how every set of male eyes in the building follow you wherever you go. They’re like bees to honey to the way you walk around with that sweet smile, swinging your hips. He wants to wrap his coat around you and haul you out over his shoulder so no other man can see you. But you aren’t his, so he needs to play it cool.

“Sure, honey. Another martini, dry.” Hollis barely spares you a glance and wave of her fingers before going back to drooling over Rafe.

She’s sitting in the chair next to him but she has it pulled so close she might as well be in his fucking lap. Her heel clad foot swings back and forth, hitting his calf every few passes and you want to break it off. She rests her chin on her folded hands as she gazes over at him with the biggest fuck me eyes you think you’ve ever seen.

“And a Coors Light for you, right? In the can.” You let your eyes flash from Rafe’s to his lips for just a split moment before locking eyes with him again. You wet your bottom lip with your tongue and then pull it between your teeth and Rafe has to literally stop himself from groaning at the sight. Hollis hasn’t solicited a single reaction out of his body the entire night, but every time he looks at you his cock gets just a little bit harder. His plan is completely backfiring on him.

“Yeah, thanks, angel.” The nickname catches you both off guard. It makes his eyes blow wide as he takes in a deep breath through his nose. He’s been holding that back for some time now but it’s true, you are an angel. Your bright eyes, the way you care for him and that little tattoo. A naughty little angel with horns, that is. And even though your insides are melting, you paint on a smug smirk, not backing down from this fight.

“You got it, babe.” You throw him a wink, just catching the way his eyes widen slightly before flicking your hair over your shoulder and turning on your heel toward the bar. You make sure to swing your hips extra because you can feel Rafe’s eyes on you. You love knowing you’re getting to him, maybe not as much as he does to you. But you’re getting a reaction and that fills you with pride you shouldn’t feel.

You make Hollis’ martini without hardly even looking, most drinks have become second nature to you after working here for three years. You peak over at Rafe after grabbing his beer and you immediately see red. Hollis has her leg thrown over his lap while she presses her tits against his big arm that you want to latch onto with your teeth and never let go. Rafe looks half interested in what she’s saying, at least. Especially when he looks over at you and fucking smirks. Yeah, you’re gonna ruin his fucking night. What if he plans on bringing her home? You don’t think you can stand to hear him fucking her from down the hall. Even the thought makes you want to puke and you wonder if that’s how he felt the other night.

That might be wishful thinking though. You paint on your sweetest smile and walk back over to their table, placing their drinks on the table. You make sure to lean over Rafe close enough that your tits graze his other arm. A silent display of possession that nobody but Rafe notices.

“Here’s your drinks, enjoy!” You turn like you’re going to walk away before quickly turning back around. “Actually, I meant to ask, how long will you be here? I kind of need a ride home.”

“He’s busy, I’m sure you can find someone else to take you ho-” Hollis tries to shoo you away but Rafe cuts her off, pushing his chair back enough that her leg falls from his lap.

“When are you off?” Hollis scoffs and detaches herself from him, sitting back in her seat. Thank god. You can’t help the small smirk you send her way.

“In an hour, I’m not closing tonight.” Your eyes lock with Rafe’s crystal blue ones and you can tell he knows what you’re doing. Yet you don’t care. And he’s still letting you do it, so. “If you don’t mind hanging around until then.”

“Actually, I was thinking about heading out soon.” Hollis shoots you a look before resting her red manicured hand on Rafe’s bicep as she looks over at him almost desperately. Pathetic. “You wanna come to my place? Have a glass of wine, get cozy?”

“I would, but I think it’s best I make sure she gets home safe.” Rafe barely spares her a glance while he shuts her down and she visibly deflates. You would feel bad if you didn’t want to rip each one of her thickly mascara lined eyelashes out of her head.

“Aww, really?” Hollis pouts as she tips her head to the side to try and get Rafe to look at her but he doesn’t. His eyes stay on you. “I think we will have a good time, I’m sure she can find another ride, can’t you?” She looks at you like you’re going to be her wingman and take one for the team or something. Too bad you don’t feel like sharing. Even if he isn’t yours and probably never will be. He’s not going to rub it in your face at your place of work.

“Actually, my ride fell through.” You cross your arms to push your tits up and set your lips into a pout. Rafe feels like he’s going to fucking lose it any second. You never ask him for help, so he knows you're jealous and it’s making his cock uncomfortably hard. “I can probably swing an uber if you’re busy though.”

“No. I’m taking you home with me.” With him. You like the sound of that. “Go do your stuff. I’ll wait.”

“I know what you were doing in there, I’ve been around the block a few times, little girl.” Rafe grits at you as pulls out of the bar parking lot. He waited for you to get off. Hollis left before he did, not without asking him to go home with her again, of course.

“And I know what you were doing in there, old man. Just because I’m younger than you doesn’t mean I’m oblivious.” You roll your eyes and put your doc’s up on his dash. It makes him groan as he reaches over to knock them back down. “Umm, rude.”

“I’m rude? And ruining my date isn’t?” Rafe scoffs.

“Oh, don’t play dumb. You didn’t want to be on that date and we both fucking know it, Rafe.” You roll your eyes and shake your head and Rafe really wishes he wasn’t driving right now so he could finally spank that attitude out of you. He has half a mind to pull over but he has to keep reminding himself you’re not his. “You would have never gone there if I didn’t work there, don’t act like that wasn’t why. Don’t pretend you didn’t want to see my reaction.”

“She asked to go there, you’re just overthinking it.” Rafe shakes his head as he turns onto the main road toward his neighborhood.

“No. If I was overthinking it, you would’ve left with her and not me. Don’t try to make me feel like I’m making shit up in my head, you were blindingly obvious about it.” His big hands tighten on the steering wheel causing the veins to pop out. You want to slobber all over them and feel them inside you. “You were trying to make me jealous and it worked, so what now?”

“Now? Nothing.” Rafe chuckles dryly and you can see his jaw tense. “We go home, you go to bed and I’ll do the same. Nothing can happen and you know that.”

“But you aren’t saying you don’t want it to.” You press the issue, you aren’t letting it go that easily.

“God damn it.” Rafe breathes out through his nose and says your name sternly. “Stop. Just stop. This can’t be a thing. No more of this shit that happened tonight. We go back to coexisting the way we should and if I want to go on dates you’re just going to have to get over that because you are my son’s fucking girlfriend, jesus.”

“Yeah, whatever, tell yourself that all you want.” You lean back in your seat with your arms crossed, turning away from him to look out the window. “You know it’s more than that but go ahead and keep lying to yourself.”

“It’s what I have to do, okay?!” Rafe snaps and slams his hand on the steering wheel before regaining his control. He runs his hand through his hair as he takes a deep breath. He isn’t the guy that loses his temper at the drop of a hat anymore but you’re so god damn frustrating it makes him feel like he’s going insane. “Now please, just let it go.”

“Fine. But I know you feel this thing between us.” You laugh dryly, your throat feeling tight from rejection even if you know you’re right. “But I’ll drop it and let you live in your little land of denial.”

“Thank you.” Rafe sighs and you both fall silent for the remainder of the drive, only the sound of the local rock station playing quietly in the background.

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You curse under your breath as you toss your keys down on the table by the door and rip your coat from your body. All the other times Caleb has forgotten to pick you up were just mildly annoying in comparison to this. Considering it’s your fucking birthday. You don’t think he even remembers. He didn’t say anything to you this morning before you left for your day shift and he hasn’t texted you all day. He did say he would pick you when you managed to momentarily wake him up though. You hoped maybe he had a surprise planned for you when you got off but you aren’t even sure why you let the thought cross your mind. It feels like he doesn’t even care about you anymore.

As much as Rafe wants to deny that there’s something between you, he gives you more attention than your own boyfriend. Caleb was out all night, so, was he passed out hungover this morning. But when you went downstairs there were doughnuts and coffee from your favorite bakery sitting on the kitchen counter. There was a pink balloon tied to the coffee and a little note in front of it that read “Happy Birthday, angel. -R.C.”

Rafe was already gone for work when you woke up so you haven’t had a chance to thank him yet. You hate that you’re more excited for him to be home than you are to see Caleb. You know he’s here somewhere because his car is out front, you assume he’s upstairs gaming with his headset on and his phone on silent. Or he’s asleep. You sigh deeply as you walk over to the box of doughnuts still sitting on the counter and pull one from the box. You take a bite before looking out the kitchen window and when you do you nearly choke.

Caleb isn’t gaming, and he’s not asleep. But he is out back in the hot tub with his “friend” Jessica. Ass naked. Fucking her from behind with her top half bent over the ledge. You feel like you’re going to be sick as you watch her mouth fall open in pleasure. Caleb pulls her hair, yanking her head back before you watch him land a smack on her ass as he fucks her roughly from behind. He’s never fucked you like that. It was always so vanilla and lackluster. Watching him fuck her like you’ve asked him to fuck you a thousand times is like a knife to your heart. Tears prickle the rims of your eyes But you don’t want to cry because you’re sad, no, you’re fucking pissed. You slam your hand down on the counter in frustration, crushing the glazed treat you’re still holding against the marble. You take a deep breath, readying yourself, and then you walk out the back door.

“Well, isn’t this just fucking rich.” You chuckle dryly as you walk across the back patio to the hot tub and Caleb and Jessica’s eyes flash toward you, their movements halting. “You know, you’ve gotten me some pretty shit presents over the years, Caleb. But being so balls deep in some other bitch that you forget my birthday entirely really takes the fucking cake.”

“Babe!” Caleb backs away from Jessica with his eyes blown wide, pulling out of her and leaving her to stand there trying to cover herself. “It’s not -”

“It’s not what it looks like, really Caleb?” You scoff and you can’t even help but laugh. “You’re a fucking idiot. There’s no talking your way out of being a cheating fucking whore when I saw it with my own two eyes.”

“Hey! Listen, I’m really sorry I didn’t -” Jessica’s voice is strained and nervous as she pulls herself from the hot tub and reaches for her clothes that are discarded on the ground.

“Shut the fuck up, bitch. You know exactly what you did. Everyone in your little friend group knows me and Caleb are together. Don’t disrespect me by lying to my face.”

You take a few hurried steps towards her and she flinches, making a smirk spread across your lips. Good. She should be scared. She’s lucky Caleb isn’t worth an assault charge. You send your pathetic excuse for a boyfriend a glare. “How long?”

“Since the ski trip…” His head hangs low between his shoulders and you can’t believe he has the audacity to be pouting right now. But he’s always been selfish.

“Oh? So this has been going on for weeks? And I bet all your little friends knew, huh?” Caleb opens his mouth to answer but you cut him off. “Were you all just sitting around laughing, knowing I was oblivious? You disgust me.”

“Babe -”

“I’m not your fucking babe! Shut up! I’m tired of hearing your god damn voice, Caleb!” You shriek and stomp your foot in frustration.

“Whoa, what the hell is going on out here?” The sound of Rafe’s voice sends an icy hot chill all through your body. God, how much of that did he see?

“Dad, don’t worry about it. Just go inside, this is none of your business.” Rafe loves his son with all his heart and even if Caleb doesn’t realize it, everything he’s done in his life has been for him. But right now? He has never been more disappointed in his entire life.

Rafe didn’t see everything but he got home around the time you were calling Caleb a cheating whore. That combined with the fact that there was a random girl scrambling to put her clothes on while his son stands naked in the hot tub doesn’t make it hard to tell what is happening.

“There’s yelling going on in my house, I think that’s my business.” Rafe is almost at a loss for words. He feels frozen. He would never abandon Caleb but the fact that he did this to you fills him with rage. The fact that he took you for granted was one thing, but cheating on you? It makes his blood boil. If it were anyone else they’d be getting their ass beat right now.

“I think I’m just going to go.” All three of their heads whip towards you at your words. Rafe looks distressed, Jessica looks guilty as hell and Caleb has a mixture of both painted on his face.

“No, you stay. I’ll feel like shit knowing you’re sleeping on your sister's couch when you’ve been pulling my weight around here anyways.” Caleb pulls himself out of the hot tub and pulls his swim trunks on before walking toward you. It makes you take a step back.

“You can stay with me, if you need.” Jessica squeaks out and it makes you belly laugh. You really are such a fucking joke.

“You don’t have to leave, either of you. We can work something out.” Rafe looks over at his son, so fucking disappointed in him but he doesn’t love him any less and he doesn’t want him to leave. But he really doesn’t want you to leave either, he’s really come to love you. Well, he loves having you around. He doesn’t love you, he can’t. But god the longer he’s around you he wants to love you so badly. Especially right now, he can see you shaking from here. He can see the angry tears threatening to fall from your eyes and he hates it. He wants to grab you, pull you into his chest, and protect you from the world.

“I won’t force her to be around me after this, dad.” Caleb sighs as he pinches his nose before locking eyes with you. “Just stay here, okay? I want you to stay where you have space. You seem happier here. I’m going to go get some stuff to get me through a couple days and I’ll come back for the rest later on. Come on Jessica, we’re leaving.”

“Listen, I’m really sorry I never meant for you to find out like this.” Jessica sends you an apologetic look.

“Ha! I don’t give a fuck about your apology, bitch. Get out of my sight before I beat your ass.” You take a threatening step toward her and she hurriedly runs toward the back door with Caleb in tow. He sends you another sad glance before walking inside, leaving you alone with Rafe.

“God, what the fuck just happened!?” You let out an aggressive deep breath as you flop down on one of the patio chairs. You groan and throw your head back, pressing the heels of your hands into your eyes.

“Are you okay?” The sound of Rafe’s voice inches from you makes you jump as your eyes shoot toward him. He’s crouching in front of the chair with a concerned look on his face and god, you want to jump into his lap and have him hold you so badly. Even when Caleb literally cheats on you, you can’t get these thoughts of Rafe out of your head. If anything they’re just increasing by the second.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. You should go check on Caleb, tell him he doesn’t have to go.” You clear your throat to stop the tears threatening to spill down your cheeks. “Once I calm down a bit I’ll go get my shit together and get out of your hair.”

“No.” Rafe’s voice is stern but not angry and your entire body heats when he rests his big hands on your knees so you’ll look at him. “I don’t want you to leave. I love my son so damn much but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed in him right now. I’ll never force him to leave but if he wants to go, I think maybe it’s for the best right now.”

“Yeah, but even if he leaves there’s no reason for me to be here if he and I aren’t together, Rafe.” You sniffle, wiping your nose and under your eyes with your hoodie sleeve. You refuse to let him see you cry.

“There is a reason, doll.” Rafe squeezes your knees slightly in a comforting manner as he looks up at you so sincerely you could almost melt. “I want you here. I like having you here. Not just because you help out around the house or because you make delicious food. I like you, I like your presence and being around you. I don’t like to talk much, I can’t stand small talk, but it comes easy with you.”

“That doesn’t make sense, Rafe. You have no obligation to me, I can’t just freeload off of you.” You sigh and Rafe can’t help it, he glances toward the house to see if Caleb is looking but the blinds are closed so he leans up on his knees and takes your face in his hands.

“I know I’m not fuckin�� obligated but I want to help you. I want you here, please?” Rafe’s voice breaks at the end and he hates that he sounds so desperate. But that desperation tells you all you need to know. He’s saying it without saying it. Rafe wants you. And now that Caleb gave you the ultimate fuck you, what’s really holding you back from having him aside from your own moral compass? He’s still Caleb’s dad. On the other hand though? Fuck Caleb and his feelings.

“Okay. I’ll stay.” Your voice is small and you swallow deeply as Rafe continues to hold your face in his big, calloused hands.

“That’s my girl.” Rafe grins at you and places a kiss on your forehead and for a second you forget who Caleb even is. He’s never touched you this much and now you never want him to stop. You want to feel his lips and hands on every inch of your body. “Sit tight, okay? I’m gonna go make sure Caleb is okay and see if he needs any help.”

You sigh and look up at the sky. The sun is setting, kissing the tops of the trees as the cold midwinter wind whips through your hair. You’d probably be freezing in your little work outfit if you weren’t so filled with adrenaline. Are you really gonna stay here with Caleb’s dad? Especially when you know how badly you want him? You know the answer is yes, against your better judgement. You’ve tried to push your feelings down, tell yourself they were based on loneliness and circumstance. But the fact that you just watched Caleb cheat on you and you were more sad about the fact that you’ll have to move away from Rafe is very telling.

You want Rafe. You want his kind gestures. You want the banter you have when you order take ou and watch cheesy horror movies on nights you were left alone. You want the way his lips look extra plush and the way his mullet looks all messy when he first wakes up. You want the possessiveness and the protectiveness. You want to jump his bones when he gets home in his work clothes all covered in mud. You want to eat dinner and shower together and fuck before bed. You want him to fuck you on every inch of this house actually. You want him so bad you can’t even deny it anymore. You want him so bad it almost hurts.

You let yourself sit with that information until you hear the front door shut and Caleb’s car pull out of the driveway. You’re finally starting to get cold so you take a deep breath and push yourself up from the chair to face the music.

As you approach the back door you realize the lights in the kitchen are off, which is odd for this time of day. Did Rafe go to bed to avoid having to interact with you? You wouldn’t blame him, part of you wants the same. You just want to sink in bed and sleep for a week. But when you open the door your hand flies to your mouth with a gasp.

The room is illuminated by candles that are lit on top of the prettiest cake. It’s shaped like a heart with pink and white frosting and your name is in the middle of it, written in pretty, frosted cursive. If that wasn’t enough there’s a little box with a bow sitting next to it and the greatest present of all is the man standing behind them. Rafe still has his navy work shirt with the logo for his company on and he has this lopsided, boyish smile painted on his face that makes your stomach erupt with butterflies. This man is a dream.

“Rafe, I- you did this for me?” Your words nearly get caught in your throat and tears prickle your eyes for an entirely different reason than they have all night. “No one has ever… No one’s ever done anything this nice for me before.”

“I know. That’s why I did it.” Rafe smiles at you sweetly as he scratches the side of his neck before running his hands through his hair. “Don’t go getting all teary eyed on me before you even open your gift, angel.”

“You didn’t have to get me anything…” Your voice is barely a whisper and you hardly trust it as you approach the counter and pick up the little box. At first glance you’d think it was jewelry but when you pull off the bow and open it up there’s a keyfob inside. “What is? Rafe, you did not buy me a car!”

“No, yeah, I did.” Rafe chuckles and comes around the other side of the counter to stand no more than a foot away from you. “You deserve it.”

“Rafe, I can’t accept this. You have to take it back.” You push the box toward him but he just stops your hand, pushing it back toward your chest.

“Well, I’m not taking it back. So if you don’t drive it, it’s just going to sit in the garage collecting dust.” He splays his hand across your chest, holding the key and your hand in his larger one as he looks down at you almost lovingly. It fills your heart with hope you’ve been refusing to let in. Rafe tucks your hair behind your ear and presses a kiss to your temple. “Let me do this for you.”

You can’t help it, you throw yourself into his arms with a squeal and he catches you easily with an arm around your waist. You’re tired of denying yourself his touch, it is your birthday, after all. Rafe chuckles and squeezes you to his chest before setting you on your feet in front of the cake.

“Make a wish, birthday girl.” He wraps his arms around your waist and tucks his chin against your shoulder like it’s the most natural thing in the world and you know exactly what you’re going to wish for. More of this. More of him. For as long as he will have you. You lean forward and blow out the candles before letting your body rest against Rafe’s with your head tilted back so you can look up at him. “What did you wish for?”

“Can’t tell you, it won’t come true.” You giggle and spin around in his arms and he takes your face in his hands. Rafe thinks you’re the most beautiful girl in the world and he can’t pretend he doesn’t anymore. He needs you. He wants to kiss you so bad and you surprise the hell out of him by throwing your arms around his shoulders and smashing your lips against his own.

The kiss starts off tender, almost nervous. But it quickly turns heated when his big hands grip onto your waist and pull you flush against him. He groans against your mouth and you use it as an opportunity to slip your tongue into his mouth and tangle it with his. You stand there making out, your hands wandering any part of each other they can reach. Rafe’s hands slip lower and slide just under the bottom hem of your skirt, grazing your ass. You

bite down on his bottom lip and Rafe pulls back to look down at you.

“Fuck, we really shouldn’t…” Rafe breathes out through his nose and bites his lip, his actions contradicting his words because his hands travel higher up your skirt and grip onto your ass possessively.

“Do you care?” You raise an eyebrow at him as you grind your stomach against his rock hard cock and scratch the back of his neck with your pointed nails.

“Fuck, not anymore.” Rafe loops his arms around your thighs and you jump up so he can carry you to the couch. He tosses you over the arm and gets on the couch behind you with his legs bracketing yours. He leans over your body so his lips are brushing the shell of your ear. “The first time I fuck you is gonna be in my bed but I’ve been waiting so long to spank that bratty ass and eat that sweet little pussy I need to do it right fucking here.”

Rafe leans back and pushes your little Jean mini skirt up over your ass to reveal the tiniest little pink thong he’s ever seen. He lands a harsh smack on your ass and it causes you to yelp and jolt forward. He gives the other the cheek the same treatment before bringing his hands down on both at once.

“So fucking perfect. Knew you would be, baby.” Rafe runs his fingers over your slit through the lace of your panties, feeling your sticky wetness. “And so fucking wet.”

He gathers some on his fingers before pulling away and marveling at the way it glistens in the low light. He hooks his arm around your neck and holds his fingers to your lips. “Suck.”

You take them into your mouth and swirl your tongue around them, tasting yourself mixed with Rafe’s salty sweat. It shouldn’t taste as good as it does but it makes you hum around his fingers as your eyes roll back.

“Been thinkin’ bout this all day, everyday, since you moved into this house, angel. You’ve been thinking about it too, haven’t you?” Rafe shoves his fingers down your throat causing you to gag as drool pools into your mouth before he pulls them out and spanks your ass with his wet hand, causing it to sting extra.

“Yes, daddy. Everyday. Want you so bad.” You arch your back and wiggle your ass and Rafe feels like he’s going to bust in his pants like a thirteen year old boy.

“Oh, baby, I don’t think you know what you just did.” Rafe chuckles as he grabs onto your thong and pulls it down to your knees, locking them in place. “You want me to be your daddy? Alright. But that means I get to beat this little ass red for the way you’ve been teasing me.”

“Yeah?” You glance over your shoulder at him with that mischievous look you always flash him in your eyes and a naughty little smirk painted on your lips. “Do you fucking worst, daddy.”

Rafe gives you that lopsided grin that makes your stomach do flips before spanking your ass hard. The skin immediately turns red and you don’t have time to process before he spanks you in the same exact spot even harder. He gives the other cheek the same treatment and then rotates back.

“That’s my good little girl.” Rafe rubs your reddened ass and then spanks you again and again. “Not such a brat now, huh? Just needed that attitude beat out of you?”

“I don’t know, I think you might have to fuck it out of me.” You giggle and wiggle your sore ass which only earns you another round of spankings, leaving you a moaning mess. He leans down and bites down hard on your asscheek as two fingers slide through your dripping folds.

“Don’t worry, doll. I’m gonna give you the best dick of your fucking life. But first, I’ve gotta taste this god damn pussy.” Rafe admires the growing bruises and the bite mark on your plump ass before grabbing your cheeks and spreading you open so he can run his tongue along your slit to your pulsing clit.

He swirls his tongue around it a few times before sliding it back down and thrusting it into your hole. Rafe flicks his tongue inside you and hooks his arm around your thigh so you can’t wiggle away.

“Oh, fuck! God, yes, daddy.” You whine and grind back into his face and when his thumb finds your clit you’re embarrassingly close. Your body subconsciously tries to run away from the mind blowing pleasure but Rafe only brings his free hand to the small of your back and uses it to pin your upper half down.

“Quit wiggling and let me devour this pussy, brat. Be a good girl and stay still for daddy, yeah?” Rafe mumbles against your pussy, the vibrations sending your eyes to the back of your skull. “Need you to cum for me, baby.”

Rafe unhooks his arm from your leg so he can thrust two fingers knuckle deep in your pussy while his lips latch onto your clit. He curls his fingers against your sweet spot and rolls his lips around your aching bud and that’s all it takes to have you seeing stars. Pleasure wracks your entire body as you shake beneath him. He sucks and fingers you through your orgasm until you’re over sensitive and your top half is limp with your arms dangling off the arm of the couch.

Rafe leans back to admire you and his cock feels like it’s going to burst. Your hair is cascading over your face as you lay limp across the couch with your ass arched in the air. Your crop top is pushed up showing off the curve of your back. Your butt is red and covered in his hand prints and the bite mark is already starting to bruise. Your little skirt is framing your hips perfectly and your pussy is all puffy and dripping creamy, white.

“I know I said I’d take you to the bed, baby girl, but this pussy just looks so god damn irresistible I’ve gotta have her right now.” You hear the metal of his belt clanking and the sound of his zipper before you feel the fat head of his cock slapping against your ass. He grips his shaft as he runs his tip through your dripping folds and then he uses your wetness to lube his cock. Rafe pumps himself a few times before lining up with your entrance and pushing inside you in one, unforgiving thrust. You both moan in unison as he bottoms out, his balls grazing your clit.

“Oh my god, I’m so full.” You whine as your walls clench around him and Rafe pulls his hips back until only his tip remains before slamming his cock back into you and starting up at a brutal pace. He grips onto your hips and fucks you like a man possessed. He’s entranced by the sight of your ass bouncing back against him while your creamy pussy coats his cock as it swallows him whole over and over again.

“You’re so fuckin’ tight, baby. This pussy is so perfect, fuck, even better than I ever could’ve imagined.” One of Rafe’s hands grips onto your throat and pulls you up so your back is flush against his front and the new angle pushes him even deeper inside you, making your pussy flutter around his cock. He grabs your hand with his free one and presses it against our belly where you can feel his cock bulging from inside you. “Feel that? You’re so fuckin’ full of me.”

“Yes, daddy, you’re so fucking big.” You gasp when he slams his hips up into yours so hard the sound echos off the walls and then he pulls almost all the way out and does it again and again, fucking you rough and deep. Rafe squeezes your neck as he pushes up your crop top so he can grope your tits and pinch your pierced nipples.

“Oh, Angel, I’ve just been dying to see these. The way you prance around in those little bikinis has been driving me insane. Let daddy see those pretty tits.” He pulls out of you and you whine at the loss. He grips onto your hips and flips you over so you’re straddling him.

Rafe leans back on the couch and runs his hands down your body before tracing up your stomach so he can graze his fingertips over your pert nipples. He circles the little bars that have hearts in the middle with a groan.

“Oh, fuckin’ look at you. Never seen anything more god damn perfect in my life.” Rafe leans forward to take a nipple in his mouth and it makes you cry out.

“In all your years, right, old man?” You giggle when he pulls back with a glare and grips onto your hip so he can lift you onto his cock, the feeling of him filling you again makes you nearly go cross eyed. “You getting tired yet?”

“I thought I fucked that little attitude out of you, huh?” Rafe plants his feet flat on the ground so he can thrust up into you while using his grip on your ass to bounce you on his cock. The sight of your tits in his face has him twitching inside you.

“I think it’s gonna take more than once, actually?” You smirk up at him and Rafe is fucking gone. He’s obsessed with you. “Can your old man knees keep up?”

“Baby, it’s so cute that you think I can’t keep up with you.” Rafe flips you onto your back and grips onto the back of your thighs as he kneels on the couch in front of you so he can pound into you harder and deeper than ever. “Rub your pussy for me.”

“Fuck, daddy, I’m so close.” You moan loudly as you bring your finger to your slick clit and rub circles on it. Rafe grips onto your throat and pins you to the couch cushion as he continues to plow into you. “Want you to fill me up, please?”

“Yeah? I’ll give you my cum as soon as you give me one more. Cum for daddy, sugar.” Rafe squeezes your throat as his dick hits your g-spot and your fingers rub your clit just right and it has euphoria washing over your body. Your pussy is like a vice grip around him and the pretty little moans you’re letting out as you come undone for him has Rafe spilling inside you. He doesn’t know if he’s ever cum this much in his life as his cock continues to pulse inside you and fill you with ropes of his cum. You lay pliant beneath him as you look up at him like he hung the stars and it fills him with pride, “Yeah, that’s my good little girl.”

“I’m fucking obsessed with you.” You breathe out and saying it outloud feels like the biggest weight off your shoulders. “I’ve wanted you so fucking badly, Rafe.”

“God, baby.” Rafe grabs your face in his hands and runs his thumbs along the apples of your cheeks. “I’m so god damn I’m obsessed with you too. Now that I’ve had you, I never wanna let you go. I’m addicted.”

“Yeah? Well you never have to. I’m pretty sure I’m going to have an attitude and tease you about your old man knees until the end of time.” You giggle when he throws you a playful glare and it makes a wide smile break out onto his face. “But who knows? Maybe I can be tamed one day, looks like you’ll just have to keep fucking me to find out…”

“I think I can manage that, angel, starting now.” Rafe leans down and kisses you sweetly before gripping onto your hips and standing up to throw you over his shoulder. “I’m gonna fuck you on every inch of this house, starting with my bed.”

In that moment you think to yourself that maybe sometimes birthday wishes really do come true. You both know shit is complicated, but right now you don’t care. You finally have him, and you’ll figure it out together.

Tagging mooties: @cxrrodedcoffin @starkeysprincess @rafeyscurtainbangs @cameronsprincess @sturnioloshacker @eddiesxangel @that-sarcastic-writer @rafesangelita @nemesyaaa @moonlightseranade 🤍

If you made it this far, thanks for sticking around for all 13k words!! I put my blood, sweat, tears, pussy, heart, soul into this. I hope you enjoy ⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆

Divider by @anitalenia

[boofeine]

Heyyyy I really love your writing and I think it fits the members very well

I am not sure if you do these types of request but are you okay with writing headcanons on Jeonghan's personality? Like just his personality in general? Are you okay with adding some spicy (I didn't know which other word I was supposed to use) ones at the end? How would he be like? I am a very weird person and I love analysing people's personality and jeonghan happens to be my main interest these days lol. You can do it through tarot if you want!! You of course know better than me lol and I am completely alright if you don't wanna do my request. I will still love you lol

helloo!! u r def not weird at all!! as a psychology major bb i also love analyzing ppl :)))) — i won't work with tarot for now bc next year im planning on open requests just for it. one more thing I've done tarot in their persona in bed over here !

Jh's personality – headcanons

WARNINGS: mdni under the cut, descriptive and mention of sexual subjects

jeonghan gives me best friends vibes... he looks calm, almost indifferent, but he just looks like he loves to peep with you, to talk for hours and go grab meals together. he reminds me of family.

you know his lives just eating, joking around and talking... that's exactly how he is with his friends. obviously, he's more reserved because it's with us, but i feel he is all out with his friends. that one friend that literally doesn't know when to stop the teasing and goes overboard, but it's funny nonetheless... especially when he's drunk.

prefers to do meetings at his home with homemade barbecue and beverages. or going to a restaurant with his close friends. not the club type 100%. he likes the introspective meetings.

cocky and flirty for fun :/

so so so so caring!!!!!! the type of person you'd choose to say your deepest secrets and ask advice. hears you closely, gives you comfort, and tries to help you how he can. he will even make sure to check up on you for the next days, make a joke or two to light up your mood.

he's love language is probably acts of service.

don't ever pick up a fight with jeonghan... he's that type of scary that nothing bothers him until it does. his words get assertive, and he's not afraid of saying what he has to.

something makes me believe jeonghan is protective with his friends. he will speak up if he's in a situation that makes any of his friends or anyone really uncomfortable. when there's something you tell him, he not necessarily picks a fight but encourages you to do what you should, would that be cut someone toxic from your life or doing what you want.

Spicy Thoughts

kinky!!!! KINKYYY!!! he will be honest with his wantings and desires with you, you will know what he wants to try, and he's hoping you're wanting too. communicative as hell, we love it.

jeonghan isn't quiet. man trying to contain himself?? not him!! he moans, groans, dirty talk, grunts, the whole package bb. you're making him feel good, and he wants you to know.

a switch and open for anything.

sex drive high and horny. when i say he's open for anything, i mean it... he's up for anything!! will not always be penetrative sex, you want to get on your knees and suck him, fine, let's do it. want to make out, grind and cum on your panties, he's up to. just finger you and make you cum on his tongue, okay... let's do that.

not the type to enjoy lazy or slow sexy, he likes raw, sweaty, and nasty sex.

im sorry, but i do believe he'd go to strip clubs. i feel like sex is a need for him, like a healthy need, you know what i mean? so if he's not with someone, he'd would satisfy that paying for it.

a tease, baby!!! prepare yourself for overstimulation, sensory play, and orgasm denial. he's up to make you cum many times 🙂‍↕️ you're getting sore and sensitive next morning.

jeonghan is not aggressive. he's ok with accessories, handcuffs, blindfolds, anything, he's just not causing you any physical pain.

[maddy-k-reads-all-day]

Amandathon!

Sophie sets up the video camera and hits record. She places the first tape she finds in Riley’s stash into the VCR. Let’s Go To the Library! The tape begins to play. 

“Hi friends! I’m Amanda!” Amanda smiles and waves. 

“And I’m Wooly!” Wooly beams. They are back to their usual outfits. 

“And today we’re having an Amandathon!” 

“What’s an Amandathon, Amanda?” Wooly asks, more as if he was playing into the bit.

“It’s a huge marathon of Amanda episodes! Just like we used to do sometimes back in the day!” Amanda beams. Wooly looks over behind her and notices… something. 

“Wha- WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!” Wooly shouts. The tape glitches. Amanda gets startled. She looks around quickly, trying to figure out what Wooly is reacting too. Finally she notices. Right behind them reading a book on top of the dumpster.

“You.” Amanda growls. Wooly immediately picks the opossum up by the neck. 

“WHY THE HECK ARE YOU HERE?! I THOUGHT WE GOT RID OF YOU!”

“Heh. Now you know how I felt when you came back to life?” Amanda chuckles playfully. 

“Shut up Amanda.”

“Excuse me?” Amanda scoffs, appalled to say the least. She shakes her head in disappointment. Wooly does not seem to care. She turns her attention back to the opossum. “So opossum,” she sneers, trying to make herself sound scary and formidable, “how long have you been back?” The opossum glares at Wooly and kicks him in the stomach, forcing him to let go. Amanda holds back a chuckle. He sassily walks back to the dumpster and jumps on top of it. Then he takes out a pencil and writes in the book he was reading. 

“Hey isn't that a library book? You're not supposed to write in those!”

“Shut up Wooly.” Amanda says. Wooly shoots her an annoyed look. The opossum holds up their writing. Amanda squints at it. “What does that even say?”

“I think it says the whole time.” Wooly reads, leaning in closer to the book. The opossum spits on Wooly, he backs up immediately and gives the opossum a dirty look. 

“That can't be right. If it is, why hasn't he been bothering us anymore?” Amanda questions. The opossum lets out an annoyed sigh and starts writing again. He holds up the book and sticks his tongue out at Wooly. Amanda squints at the book again. “Life is pointless now. Okay, wow. Bleak.” The opossum shrugs, chucks the book at Wooly's face and makes raspberries at him.

“Amanda. Permission to kill him now?”

“No Wooly.”

“Amanda, turn around real quick.”

“I'm not falling for that.” Amanda rolls her eyes. She taps her chin in thought. “Say opossum, why don't you join us for the Amandathon?” The opossum tilts his head in confusion.

“Why would you ever suggest that?!” Wooly snaps, “He took out my eye you know! Among other things.”

“Yeah so? I killed you and I'm still your best friend somehow.”

“Amanda, you're my only friend.” Wooly rolls his eyes. 

“Ow. When did you get so mean?” Amanda says dramatically.

“I'm not being mean.” Wooly pouts folding his arms. The opossum shrugs and jumps off the trash bin.

“I’ll take that as a yes! So let’s go to the library!” Amanda beams. The tape glitches to the library. “Wow… it’s all fixed up now huh?” 

“Amanda… are you going to be okay coming back here? I mean after last time…” 

“It’s fine Wooly.” she lies before turning to the opossum, “Welcome to the Kensdale Public Library buddy!” Wooly rolls his eyes. “You’re a kid right? Let’s take you to the children’s section-tion-tion-tion.” the tape glitches to the kids section. 

“Go on, pick out a book you like.” Amanda offers. The opossum takes the smiling flower book and starts eating it. “No opossum! We don’t eat books!” Amanda scolds, fighting the opossum in a game of tug-of-war to get the book out of its mouth. Finally he lets it go, making Amanda fall backwards with a slobbery, half-shredded book in her hands. “Ewww… Well, here’s your book, Wooly.” she says, half-jokingly. 

“I am not touching that.” Wooly says, looking like he’s about to throw up. Amanda shrugs and tosses the book aside.

“Keep an eye on him okay?” Amanda mumbles. 

“Huh? Why?” Wooly gasps. 

“I need some… me-time.” Amanda sighs. She walks off, leaving Wooly and the opossum in the kids section. 

“She needs some me-time.” Wooly grumbles to himself mockingly, “Yeah sure just leave me with the- HEY STOP THAT!” the tape glitches back to Amanda. She walks up to the library counter, looking at the owl. 

“Did you find everything you need today?” she asks. 

“Can you help me find my favorite book?” Amanda questions quietly. 

“I’m sorry I don’t know what book that is. Can you tell me what you’re looking for?” 

“Haha… of course you wouldn’t know.” Amanda chuckles sadly. 

“If you give me the title maybe I can find it.” 

“I’d like to read The Nightingale.” Amanda says. The owl types the title into the computer. 

“I’m sorry. It seems that the book is currently checked out. We have other books. Let’s find something for you togeth-ther-ther-ther.” 

“Okay.” Amanda replies. The owl stands up and starts maneuvering around the library. Amanda follows suit. 

“We have other titles by that author. Oooh. Look at this-is-is-is-is.” Kate hands Rebecca a- The owl hands Amanda a book. It is a collection of fairy tales by Hans Christain Anderson. Amanda flips through it. 

“Wait a second… this is…” there it was. “No way… it was… here the entire time…” tears start welling up in her eyes and she starts to cry. 

“Wrong book?” the owl asks, tilting her head in confusion. 

“No… No it’s perfect…” Amanda cries, giving the owl a big hug. The owl’s model starts to glitch out. 

“Happy to he-he-he-help.” The owl promptly glitches back to the counter. Amanda wipes her tears and returns to the children’s section. Where Wooly and the opossum are… beating each other up. 

“Ahem. Have you found a book yet?” Both immediately look up at her in shock. Amanda looks pissed.

“He started it!” Wooly shouts, immediately standing up. The opossum bites his arm. “You little-” he swats the opossum off and back into the wall. She walks up to them and smacks them both upside the head with her book really hard. “Hey!” 

“Be quiet in the library.” She says with a calm, chilling sternness. 

“Got it.” Wooly responds, nodding frantically. Even the opossum sits in a well behaved manner. Amanda shakes her head in disappointment. They both show a book and all head back toward the desk. 

“You know… I used to come here a lot after Kate died… when no one was watching, just to hear her voice again.” 

“Amanda…” 

“It’s not her… I know it will never really be her… but sometimes I just miss her so much…” Amanda sounds like she’s going to cry again but she takes a really deep breath. Wooly looks at the ground with a guilty expression. They all walk up to the desk. The opossum sticks his tongue out at Wooly. Wooly is clearly annoyed but he chooses to look the other way. 

“Did you find everything you need today?” the owl asks. 

“Yes, thanks to you.” Amanda smiles gratefully. 

“Good! It is due-due-due-due-due-due-due---” the owl’s whole body starts glitching out. Amanda turns to walk away. “Have a nice day Rebecca.” a voice, clearly a recording, plays through the owl’s mouth. Amanda whips around in shock. The owl continues glitching and contorting before breaking down like a robot and laying limp like a dead person. 

“Kate… did she… record that for me?” Amanda wonders, frozen in one place. The tape ends. Sophie hits stop on the camera and uploads the file to a harddrive on her computer. I wonder what Riley would have thought… if they heard that. Sophie wonders. She sets the camera back up and puts in the next tape. 

“Welcome back! It’s your friend Amanda!” Amanda beams. 

“And… you’re pal Wooly!” Wooly says, a little flustered and confused by Amanda’s different opening. 

“Today we’re going to the park!” Amanda announces. “Can you tell me where the park is?” Amanda pulls out the map of her neighborhood. It takes Sophie a minute before she realizes. 

“Oh you want me to pick? Um… there.” “That’s right!” Amanda beams, closing the map. The tape glitches to the park. “There are so many things to see and do at the park!” 

“Like what Amanda?” Wooly asks unenthusiastically. 

“Like we can see… different animals.” Amanda pauses remembering their previous conversation. Static starts to cover the tape, but Amanda snaps out of it. “What animals do you see?” Oh she wants me to interact with her on this one. Okay. Well I guess that’s fair. Sophie thinks. She points to the opossum. “Look, it’s our new friend, the opossum!” 

“Since when was he our friend?” Wooly grumbles. Amanda’s eye twitches. She pulls Wooly in for a group huddle. 

“Wooly I think this opossum might be somewhat like us.” Amanda whispers. 

“Like us?! He is clearly nothing like us!” Wooly hisses. “An-And even if he was, we shouldn’t let him hang out with us.” 

“Why not?” “Because! He’s always being super rude and messing with us!” 

“Maybe he’s just lonely?” Amanda suggests. They look over at the opossum, which is currently choking on a dead bird. Wooly gives her a skeptical look. “Oh come on I’ve seen you eat some pretty weird things.” 

“Not dead birds.” Wooly scoffs, folding his arms. “And you are not one to talk.”

“Come on Wooly, just give him a chance.” 

“He bit me yesterday!” 

“So? It’s not like you can get rabies here.” 

“Oh but I think I might.” Wooly says dramatically, pretending he’s going to faint. Amanda smiles and rolls her eyes. 

“Wooly you’re fine.” she chuckles. “If you could forgive me, you can forgive anybody.” 

“Ye-yeah… I guess that’s true…” Wooly replies nervously, looking away, but it doesn’t sound sincere. 

“So let’s give him a chance, alright?” 

“Oh alright. Fine.” Wooly smiles weakly. 

“Opossum! Opossum!” Amanda calls out, “Wanna go to the playground with us?” She asks. She glances over and notices Sophie looks busy so she pulls out her map and asks the Opossum, “Can you tell me where the playground is.” The opossum takes the map and eats it. Amanda looks pissed. 

“Look I told you so.” Wooly says. Amanda glares at them both with annoyance. The tape glitches right to the park. “Let’s play!” she shouts, with anger poorly hidden in her voice. The opossum runs off and slides down the slide on his own. Wooly takes a leisurely ride on the swings. “Um guys… aren’t we going to play together?” But everyone seems to be doing their own thing. “Playgrounds are boring anyway…” she grumbles, “Why does this world always treat us like little kids?” Suddenly the tape glitches out and ends. Sophie looks over in surprise. Amanda seems to be ending these episodes sooner and sooner. I… hope she’s alright. She thinks. Sophie uploads this one to the harddrive and looks at the next tape. When You Get Sick. Should we skip this one? She wonders. But she told Riley she’d record as many as she could, so she puts the tape into the VCR. The tape begins to play. 

“Hi friends, I’m Wooly.” Wooly announces. He looks around and giggles a little. “We can’t go on our adventure yet today because Amanda hasn’t woken up yet. Sophie, wanna wake her up with me?” 

“Well alright.” Sophie answers. Considering this tape’s title I don’t think that’s a good idea. Wooly goes up to Amanda’s door and knocks. 

“Amanda, it's time to get up!” he says in a sing-song voice. 

“Go away Wooly, I don't feel good today.” 

“Can I come in? Maybe I could help you feel better?” Wooly asks. Amanda doesn’t object so he opens the door. “What’s wrong Amanda? Are you sick?” 

“No…” Amanda mumbles. Wait what? Sophie thinks. “I just… I don’t wanna get out of bed today.” 

“But… you should at least have breakfast? And what about our adventure?” Wooly questions. Amanda tiredly looks at the camera. 

“I don’t wanna go on an adventure today…” she mumbles. “I don’t wanna do anything today.” The tape fades out and falls out of the machine. The title has changed to When You’re Not Okay. Sophie looks at it worriedly. Okay… yeah… she’s definitely not doing well. Sophie thinks. She decides to take a break and have some tea before continuing onto the next tape. Sophie scrolls through her computer and sees all the homework she has to do. She works for a while until it’s around 4pm. I guess I should go back to recording Amanda now… maybe I could multitask? Do some homework while I record? She thinks to herself. She takes her computer downstairs, sets up the camera and puts in the next tape. Let’s Go On a Hike! The tape begins with Amanda and Wooly standing in the woods. 

“Hi friends! I’m Amanda!” 

“Amanda, are you sure you’re okay to be going on a hike today? You weren’t feeling well just yesterday.” Wooly asks. Amanda shoots him an annoyed look. 

“I’m fine now, Wooly.” 

“But-” 

“And now you spoiled our whole opening!” She scoffs in annoyance, throwing her hands into the air. Wooly looks guilty. “As our friend Wooly said, we are going on a HIKE today!” 

“Hikes are very important for the mind and body!” Wooly adds. Amanda glares at him. He looks back at her with confusion. 

“Today we’re going to watch the sunset in our originally planned place! Since we um… ended up at the wrong place last time.” 

“But Amanda… I don’t like walking in the woods at night…” “Don’t worry about it Wooly, you’ll be fine!” Amanda grins, she seems to be hiding something. 

“Amanda, we talked about this!” Wooly groans. Amanda pulls the camera aside away from where Wooly can't hear. With her face this close to the screen, Sophie can clearly see the bags under her bloodshot eyes. Poor kid… looks like she hasn’t had a wink of sleep. Sophie thinks. It also seems like… she’s been crying?

“Psst! Extra Extra! Don’t tell Wooly but I got a little surprise waiting at the top of the mountain! Oooh! It’s gonna be so much fun!” she squeals. Surprise? Sophie thinks, feeling a tad bit concerned. Amanda walks back over to Wooly.

“What were you talking about just now?” Wooly questions.

“Nothing… NOTHING.” She laughs, she walks up to the big hiker's backpack she brought and tries to put it on, but proceeds to fall backwards from its weight.

“I gotcha.” Wooly says, catching her and putting her back on her feet. “How about I carry that?”

“Are you sure?” Amanda says, handing him the backpack. He puts it on and wobbles a little. 

“I’m sure.” He grins. 

“Well alright! Let’s go on our hike!” Amanda beams. Wooly starts walking. “Wooly hold still, you have our map.” Amanda says, stopping him and rummaging through the backpack for her map. “Which pocket did I put it in again?” 

“Why do you have such a big backpack anyway?” Wooly questions.

“Aha! Found it!” Amanda pulls the map out triumphantly. “You see, last time we had problems because we weren’t prepared. So this time I made absolutely sure we have EVERYTHING we need.” she announces proudly. 

“But… when did you have time to do all this?” 

“Hahahaha! You’re so funny Wooly!” Amanda laughs in a slightly-manic fashion. 

“Um what? How was that funny? That- I don’t understand?” Wooly says, completely confused. Suddenly the opossum appears from the bushes. Amanda’s eye twitches. “Hi opossum! Do you wanna go on a hike with us today?” Wooly offers. Amanda whips an appalled glare at him. 

“The one day I didn’t- ugh.” Amanda sighs, “Actually opossum, I just want it to be me and Wooly today okay?” The opossum nods and runs off. 

“Oh, sorry about that. I thought you were going to invite him-”

“Well I wasn’t. Okay?!” she snaps. She lets out a tired sigh. “Let’s go Wooly.” They walk off into the woods. They reach a fork in the road. Amanda examines the map carefully. “Okay… I think I’m holding it right this time… which means we should go… that way.” She continues finding the different paths until… “Phew! I’m tired. Let’s take a break.” She says. She stops Wooly and pulls out two water bottles from the backpack. 

“Oh if I knew you packed those I would’ve asked for one.” Wooly mentions. Amanda hands him one. 

“I also have plenty of snacks too!” Amanda says, pulling out a bag of trailmix. “Look, it’s homemade.” Wooly looks kind of concerned, but the two both sit on some rocks and enjoy some snacks and water together. As soon as they're done eating Amanda says: “Alright! Break time is over! Back to walking!” 

“Already? I’m still kinda tired.” Wooly complains. 

“We don’t want to miss the sunset though, do we Wooly?” Amanda questions. Wooly sighs begrudgingly and stands back up. The tape glitches and they are finally at the peak. There, a full camping area is all set up. 

“Surprise, after the sunset we’re going camping tonight!” Amanda eagerly announces. “Ca-camping?!” Wooly gasps, “No! Why didn’t you tell me about this before? We’re camping?!” 

“Yeah! Aren’t ya excited Wooly?” “No of course not! We’re camping? In the middle of the woods with no adults? In the woods where we encountered WOLVES earlier? I don’t even have my pjs or my special bunny or my nightcap or anything! What about our nightlights? Wha-What about my nighttime routine?! What if I mess up some secret super sacred camping rule?!” 

“You don’t… like it?” Amanda sounds really hurt. 

“I do appreciate the thought but… I don’t like surprises Amanda. I wasn’t even given time to mentally prepare for this… I… it’s just a lot-”

“But I stayed up all night… trying to make this hike nice and fun for us. I tried so hard…” she mumbles, hugging her arms and trembling a little. 

“I’m sorry-” 

“It’s fine. We still have time before the sunset. I’ll just pack all this up and take it back tomorrow.” 

“No no, Amanda we can go camping. I’m sorry I shouldn’t have reacted that way. I mean you worked really hard on this. That was insensitive of me…” 

“Wooly. It’s fine.” 

“But I feel bad.”

“Don’t.” Amanda says in a cold, harsh voice that sends a shiver up Wooly’s spine. 

“Um… okay then.” Wooly says nervously. Amanda lets out an annoyed huff and starts packing up the camping stuff. Wooly watches awkwardly for a bit, before coming over and starting to pick the stuff up as well. 

“Don’t help me!” Amanda snaps. Wooly flinches. Then he looks a bit mad. 

“I want to help you.” he insists forcefully. Amanda looks away and says nothing, but doesn’t stop him. They continue cleaning up the camping stuff in silence for a bit. “You know I do want to go camping with you… just… maybe on a different day and we can plan things out together. You know I have a lot of fun planning adventures with you…” 

“Fine.” Amanda pouts, still looking away. Wooly smiles awkwardly. Then he looks over at the sky and his expression immediately changes. 

“Um Amanda… is it just me or is it getting cloudy all of a sudden?” he asks. Amanda looks up. Dark clouds form quickly in the sky. Suddenly there is a downpour. “Aw! Now we can’t see the sunset!” Wooly complains. Amanda suddenly screams at the top of her lungs. Wooly covers his ears. A strike of lightning hits a tree in the distance and catches flame. The tape is glitching really badly. 

“It feels like this entire world is AGAINST US!” she screams before the tape glitches out and falls out of the machine. It seems like the effects of neglect on this imaginary world are really taking its toll. Sophie thinks worriedly. As soon as Riley gets back… I’m going to have to do another interrogation on Carl. Until then… 

She looks for the next tape. Let’s Start the Day! 

Riley told me that there were originally two of these tapes with the same name. One with green lettering and the other with red. An Amanda verison and a Wooly version… They also said Wooly was acting really weird in his version. Oh boy. Sophie sighs and puts the tape into the VCR. The tape starts with Wooly dangling off the side of his bed upside down for some reason. 

“Um… hi Wooly, you okay there?” 

“Ah Sophie hi!” Wooly gasps, suddenly he slips off the bed and hits his head on the floor. 

“That looked like it hurt.” 

“Heh heh… it didn’t.” Wooly laughs awkwardly. 

“You still don’t feel anything?”

“Nope! But let’s not talk about that right now okay? Or ever for that matter.” Wooly pauses for a couple seconds. 

“How’s the Amandathon been? I’m not tiring you guys out am I?” 

“A little but I’m fine.” Wooly smiles, “But uh… I think Amanda has been acting… kinda off lately?” 

“Yeah. I noticed.” 

“Oh phew, so it wasn’t just me.” Wooly sighs in relief. “I haven’t seen her act like this since…” a shiver runs up his spine. 

“Since Kate first died?” 

“Mmmhmm.” he nods. What do I even say in this situation? I don’t even know what’s going on…

“Wait… it’s morning? Riley said last time it was night…” Sophie observed. Let’s just change the subject.

“For now it is, give it a second.” Wooly scoffs. She realizes that the sun keeps going up and down every couple seconds. “Yeah. It’s been like that all day… is it day? I don’t know anymore.” 

“Oh boy. Well don’t worry. As soon as Riley gets back I’m going to talk with Carl again to find a solution.” 

“I wouldn’t trust him if I were you Sophie.” Wooly says seriously. Believe me I don’t. 

“Why not?” Sophie asks. Is there something he did like… specifically?

“He worked for Hameln… and while he may have been nice he also… seemed desperate. Like he’d do anything to survive. He’d sacrifice anyone. I don’t think he’d lie or give you false information. If he says he wants to help… he probably isn’t lying… but the moment it comes at the danger of his life… he’s going to do anything to live. I know it.” Wooly says, curling himself in a cozy little ball. He looks… comfortable. Usually he doesn’t when talking about this stuff. Sophie realizes. 

“How do you know that?” 

“Well I mean, I saw it first hand… but also… I used to be like that…” 

“Really… you don’t seem the type Wooly.” 

“What can I say? I’m selfish I guess.” he shrugs. 

“You weren’t selfish Wooly, you were just in an awful position that no child should ever be placed in-” “I don’t want to hear it, Sophie.” Wooly sulks, pulling himself in tighter. There it is… he’s closing himself off again.

“Well alright… did you sleep well?” “Surprisingly, yes.” Wooly says, “I mean… I think. The clock is also not working.” he points out, the clock numbers are flipping all over the place. 

“I see… so… why are you just hanging around in your room?” 

“I can’t decide if it’s morning or not yet… like should I go back to sleep or wake up? I’m not exactly sure… hmmm…” 

“What about Amanda?”

“Oh she’s definitely sleeping. Or at least… she hasn’t left her room yet and um… I don’t know, she’s been in a mood lately that I don’t want to get testy with you know?” 

“That makes sense.” 

“Anyway… that doesn’t mean you can’t make breakfast yourself right?” 

“I suppose you're right… I am getting hungry.” Wooly says. The tape glitches to the living room. “Um hmm… this wasn’t where I was trying to go…” the tape glitches again to the bathroom. “Heh heh… whoops. Usually it just goes-” the tape glitches to the card section of the store. “Amanda must be playing some sort of prank on me right now.” the tape glitches to Amanda’s room. Wooly notices immediately she’s still asleep. He quietly tiptoes out. “Okay… so it’s not Amanda… and it’s not me… what is going on?” he wonders, tapping his chin. The tape glitches to outside. It’s still raining. Wooly looks extremely annoyed. He carefully walks into the kitchen. “I… um… wow… I hate this.” Amanda glitches onto the counter.

“Wah! Cold- Oh. Hi Wooly, why are you soaking wet?” she questions.

“Just go back to bed. I’ll make us breakfast.” Wooly sighs. 

“Um… okay?” she slowly climbs off the counter, “Weird.” She walks out of the kitchen. Wooly grabs some bread out of the now lowered cabinet. 

“Look at me, I don’t need your help anymore!” Wooly giggles proudly.  

“Aw Wooly…” Sophie says sadly. 

“Wha- Don’t feel bad! I… I can find something for you to do um um!” Wooly looks around in a panic. 

“Look Wooly, if you don’t need me I can go.” Sophie teases. 

“NO!” Wooly shouts. Sophie flinches. Wooly starts breathing heavily, like he’s about to have a panic attack. Oh yeah… I forgot that both of them are one word away from a mental breakdown at all times. 

“Wooly, Wooly buddy it’s okay. I’m not going anywhere.” Sophie says softly. How did Riley manage these two all this time? Wooly takes a deep breath and puts the toast into the toaster. He walks over to the fridge. “Now I don’t like bacon, but Amanda is obsessed with it. So I gotta make her some.”

“You can cook bacon?” Sophie asks. Wooly stops and looks down at the floor. 

“Can I cook bacon?” he asks himself. He stands there kinda paralyzed. 

“Did you tell Amanda you’d make her bacon without actually knowing how to make bacon?” Sophie asks. Wooly nods. Oh boy. Sophie thinks. 

“I should watch the toast and make sure it doesn’t burn again.” Wooly says. Again?! Amanda, why are you letting him cook?! “Oh don’t worry I was half-asleep last time.”

“Wait Wooly, do you even know how to make bacon?” Amanda asks, walking in while rubbing her eyes groggily. 

“Amandaaaa…” Wooly whimpers. 

“Ban him from the kitchen.” Sophie says. 

“EXCUSE ME?!” Wooly snaps. Amanda bursts out laughing. 

“Don’t worry Sophie, Wooly’s actually pretty good at cooking. Except he seems to be terrible at breakfast for some reason.” Amanda explains. 

“That’s because you make breakfast this whole thing. Why can’t we just eat cereal or oatmeal?” 

“Wooly, Wooly, Wooly, breakfast is one of the few pleasures I get in this world.” Amanda says in a refined and elegant tone. Suddenly the tape glitches them both outside. It’s still raining. “GRAAH! THAT’S IT!” Wooly screams, storming back inside. “I DON’T EVEN WANT BREAKFAST ANYMORE!” Amanda can hear a door slamming all the way from down stairs. Is it just me or are their mental states far worse than before? Sophie observes. 

“Um… Wow… okay…” Amanda mumbles, walking back inside. She glitches to Wooly’s doorway. “Hey um… can I come in?” 

“I guess so.” Wooly pouts. Amanda opens the door and sees Wooly sitting on the floor still completely soaking wet.

“Come on Wooly let’s dry off and eat breakfast together, alright?” 

“Fiiiiiine.” Wooly groans. The tape ends. Riley told me to be careful around the next tape since Wooly had a bit of a freakout and Riley got hurt. I haven’t seen the demons yet but I feel like I’m treading a thin wire with that. She lets out a deep sigh and pulls out the next tape. Our New Friend. She starts the video on the camera and puts the tape into the VCR, it immediately starts to play. 

“Hi again, I’m Amanda.” Amanda smiles and waves. 

“And I’m Wooly!” Wooly beams. 

“And today we have a letter from a friend at home-” “Amanda… can we not do this episode?” Wooly questions. 

“Yeah I’m getting really tired of all of this…” Amanda sighs. “Hey Sophie? Do we have to record ALL of the tapes?” 

“I guess not…” Sophie replies. 

“Then why don’t we just skip to the shopping tape and be done with it?” Amanda groans. 

“Well… okay then…” Sophie says. Well okay then… Thank god for that. She thinks. She looks for the shopping tape in the massive pile of tapes. Maybe we should get a shelf for all these. Let’s Go Shopping… this should be the one. Honestly I’m getting a bit tired of this myself. Sophie restarts the video and puts the new tape into the VCR. 

“Hi friends, it’s me, Amanda!” Amanda beams with a friendly little wave. 

“And me, Wooly!” Wooly grins. 

“And today we’re going grocery shopping!” 

“Yaaaay!” Wooly says enthusiastically. 

“That’s the spirit, Wooly!” 

“Are we going to bring up the tax fraud thing again?” Wooly asks excitedly, bouncing up and down a little.

“You’ve become such a troublemaker Wooly!” Amanda teases. 

“I- I have not!” Wooly gasps glancing at Sophie quickly. 

“Sure Wooly, let’s go shopping!” Amanda says. The tape glitches and fades out. Tax fraud thing? Wait no I kind of want to hear about that… Sophie thinks to herself. 

“First things first, we have to go back to… the butcher…” Amanda groans. 

“We don’t have to.” Wooly reminds her. 

“We’re out of meat Wooly.” 

“We don’t need it.” 

“Maybe but I still want it.” “Then I’m staying out here.” Wooly concludes, folding his arms and planting his feet on the ground firmly, turning his back to Amanda completely. Amanda looks kind of scared. 

“C’mon Wooly, you’re not really going to make me go in there alone are you?” 

“I don’t see why I should.” 

“Wooly… please?” Amanda pleads. Wooly glances at her puppy-dog eyes and…

“That doesn’t work on me anymore, you know that.” Wooly sighs.

“Bu-but!” 

“I’m not going in there. Last time you nearly broke my hand!” 

“We can take you to the doctor.” 

“How about you just don’t break my bones?!” Wooly snaps. “Forget this, I'm going to the store.” 

“What? Why!” “I. Need. Peanut. Butter.” 

“Huh?” 

“You used up all my peanut butter and now I have NOTHING for lunch!” Wooly explains throwing his hands up in the air. “Honestly, I’m kind of done with this whole Amandathon thing so I think I’m just going to get my peanut butter and go home.” 

“You’ve been moody… this whole Amandathon… over a freaking PEANUT BUTTER SANDWICH?!” Amanda shouts, clearly angry. 

“Moody? Have I been moody? Sorry I didn’t mean to be-” Wooly’s eyes widen in realization, “Wait a minute no I haven’t! If anyone has been weirdly moody this whole Amandathon it’s you.” 

“What?! I have NOT!” 

“Have to!” 

“Have not!” 

“Have to!” 

“HAVE NOT!” 

“HAVE TO!” 

“SHUT UP!” Amanda screams. Wooly flinches. 

“I won’t shut up! You always do this! Every time something is going on with you, you just get really touchy and refuse to talk to anyone about it and it really pisses me off!” 

“You don’t listen anyway!” 

“How can I listen if you don’t even talk!” Wooly snaps.

“You wouldn’t understand!” 

“Why are you just assuming that when you haven’t even told me what’s wrong?” 

“You wanna know what’s wrong? YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT’S WRONG?!” 

��YEAH THAT’S WHY I’M ASKING YOU IDIOT!” Wooly screams. Amanda flinches. Wooly freezes. The tape glitches. “I… I’m sorry I didn’t mean to yell…” 

“You think I’m an idiot?” Amanda asks. 

“Kind of? Sometimes?” Wooly covers his mouth. “Oops-” Amanda doesn’t even look angry anymore. She mumbles something really quietly. “What was that?” he lifts his ear up. 

“I… I can’t feel it anymore either…” Amanda whimpers. Wooly freezes. 

“Oh.” Wooly responds awkwardly. “Why… did you think I wouldn’t understand that?” 

“It’s not just that.” Amanda says quietly, sitting down on the curb and burying her face in her hands. Wooly sits down beside her. “It just… hit me…” 

“What hit you? Huh?” he replies, completely confused, “You lost me.” 

“It just hit me that… we’re never getting out of here Wooly…” 

“Oh yeah… that…” 

“You knew all along didn’t you?” Amanda pouts, refusing to even look at him. 

“I… yeah…” 

“That’s exactly what you wanted isn’t it?”

“Maybe? Ye-yeah? Yeah…” Wooly finally admits. “But… I don’t exactly feel good about it… I… I wanted you to get out of here. I… I was going to do anything… for you to get out of here… but I… I guess in the end it doesn’t matter what I was willing to do, does it?” Wooly chuckles sadly. “I guess I’m an idiot too.” 

“We’re not idiots… we’re just kids… and now that’s all we’ll ever be.”

“Don’t… don’t say it like that… you’re gonna make me cry…” Amanda looks at him, clearly already crying. “Stop it. I’m not going to the butchers with you, this won’t work on me.” he tries to chuckle a little, but his voice cracks. Amanda gives him a big hug, burying her face in Wooly’s wool. “Amanda come on… stop crying, you’re getting snot in my wool.” 

“Not any more than you are.” Amanda teases but then she starts crying harder, “We’re really stuck like this… and we’re never getting out of here… we’re never getting out… we’re never…” 

“Amanda stop it… you’re breaking my heart…” Wooly whimpers.

“Join the club you silly sheep.” Amanda giggles sadly. Just then, they notice the opossum walking by sipping a smoothie giving them a very weird look. “Come on opossum, join the snot hug!” Amanda offers. The opossum looks back and forth at both of them with a mix of disgust and confusion. 

“I swear to Hameln if you join in the snot hug I will kill you.” Wooly grumbles, giving the opossum a death glare. 

“Don’t be like that Wooly.” 

“He’s ruining the moment!” 

“Forget the moment, Wooly, I’m feeling better now. Thanks for listening.” 

“Anytime Amanda, anytime.” Wooly smiles. Amanda stands up and reaches out her hand to help Wooly up. He looks down and realizes he actually is covered in snot. “Can we just get this over with so I can go home and have a bubble bath?” 

“Yeah but this time we’re getting you your own bottle of bubble bath.” Amanda replies. 

“Fine by me.” Wooly smiles. 

“Can you tell us where the store is?” Amanda asks. Sophie clicks on the store. Suddenly all the stores turn into the meatman’s place. “WHAT THIS AGAIN?!” 

“Why does this only happen when I decide we should go off-script?!” Wooly shouts. The opossum looks terrified and scampers behind Amanda and Wooly for protection. 

“Wait… this only happens to you but what about that time we sent the… Wooly you didn’t!” 

“Can we stop about about me being an absolute moron in the past and handle the situation in front of us!” Wooly snaps, clearly way more stressed out then Amanda. 

“Okay okay. If we just go into the butchers and get the meat it’ll be fine!” 

“Why does he want us to eat meat so badly?!” Wooly shouts. 

“I don’t know, I never thought about it to be honest! Let’s just go in and get this over with!” Amanda announces. But the opossum clings to her and shakes his head frantically. “Wait, why are you afraid of the butcher?” The opossum frantically starts playing charades pointing to the butchers and then making a neck cutting motion with his finger. “Wait… so let me make this clear. You watched Amanda the Adventurer right?” Amanda asks. The opossum nods. “And you got trapped in the tapes right?” he nods again. “And you’re saying that the meatman… butchers the people who get stuck in the tapes?” he nods once more.

"That's a bit of a leap in logic isn't it... wait... that means-" Wooly turns pale.

“Oh… oh my god… what the f***.” This time, neither Wooly nor Sophie calls her out for her language. “How did I not realize this before? Haha… oh my god… that means… oh my g-”

“Amanda, you don’t need to feel guilty about this… Hameln’s at fault not you.” Wooly tells her in a weak voice.

“Wooly… you don’t get it…” 

“Please stop assuming I don’t get things… just explain it.” 

“Wooly… when we eat meat we’re-” “Okay please stop explaining. I think I get the point.” Wooly says, looking completely grossed out and disturbed.

“What do we do? Wooly? Opossum? What do we do?” Amanda asks desperately, looking back and forth at both of them. Wooly stops and ponders, Amanda and the opossum do to. There is a period of silence while the tape just sits there, glitching. The music is distorted and the tape grows fuzzy.

“I think I have an idea…” Amanda says, breaking the silence. The two quickly whip their heads in her direction. “Why don’t we just kill the meatman?” There is a bit of stunned silence. 

“Kill… the meatman?” Wooly repeats. Amanda nods. “Kill the meatman? Are you crazy? We can’t kill the meatman? Can we? And what if he comes back? And what will it do to this world?” 

“What do we have to lose? It’s not like we can die! Besides you came back because you’re a main character, a fan-favorite. This world can’t exist without you just as much as me!” Amanda explains, waving her finger in Wooly’s face. The animation became so smooth all of the sudden. Sophie notices.  

“Fan… favorite?” 

“I mean, no one likes the butcher right?” Amanda laughs nervously, “Once we beat him, there will be no problems in this world. You know what? I like this plan! Do you like the plan, opossum?” Amanda asks. The opossum nods its head. “Come on what do you say Wooly? It could be fun.” 

“I don’t know…” Wooly says, the tape starts to glitch again. Hmm… maybe… Sophie thinks. 

“I think you should.” Sophie says. 

“Huh? Really?” Wooly gasps. 

“Worth a shot.” she shrugs. 

“You with me Wooly?” Amanda grins. 

“I…” Wooly pauses then a determined smile crosses his face, “Always.” the animation quality suddenly returns.

“Oh boy what a way to end the Amandathon right guys? I’m getting all excited!” Amanda beams. She turns around and realizes that Wooly’s legs are shaking like a baby fawn. The opossum also looks frozen in place. “Let’s go.” Amanda demands, taking them both by the arms and dragging them inside. They enter the butcher shop. Amanda also seems a bit weak in the knees all the sudden. “On second thought… why don’t we just tell the meatman what we need?” she says weakly. 

“Amanda…” Wooly says in the most disappointed tone of voice anyone has ever heard. 

“What kind of meat do we need from the meatman?” Amanda asks, giving Sophie a wink. Oh. Sophie types in meatman. “That’s right! We’re having meatman for dinner tonight!”

“So we really are just doing this then?” Wooly laughs nervously. “Okay then.”

The meatman, however, did not take kindly to Amanda’s threat and immediately raised his blade at them. “Um Amanda do we have a plan?” 

“Nope, not really.” Amanda shrugs. Amanda jumps up on the counter the meatman slams the blade down onto the cutting board "Just gonna take this.” Before the meatman can lift the knife again Amanda swipes it and slams it into the meatman’s head. Blood splatters everywhere. The meatman stops moving. She jumps off the counter. “Wow! That was so easy.” Amanda says clapping her hands together. "Why didn't we just do that sooner?" she laughs. She turns to Wooly and the opossum. “So why don’t we head to the store now?” The meatman takes the blade out of its head and lifts it above Amanda’s head. 

“Amanda, look out!” Wooly shouts, he quickly jumps in front of her and catches the blade in his hand. 

“Wooly you’re bleeding!” 

“I know right? I feel like this would usually really hurt huh?” Wooly laughs, the blade cuts right through his hands. Amanda pulls him back. 

“Oh my goodness are you okay? Of course you’re not okay… haha WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!” Amanda screams, shaking him.

“My hand was gonna end up broken today one way or another.” Wooly chuckles. Amanda notices the opossum climbing up the meatman and biting viciously at his head. The meatman quickly takes him and slams him against the wall. 

“What’s going on?” Riley asks, coming through the door. 

“Amanda, Wooly, and the opossum are fighting the meatman to the death.” Sophie explains.

“Why does the interesting stuff only happen when I’m gone.” Riley sighs. The meatman looms over the three of them, raising its blade over their heads. 

“I can’t look!” Wooly whimpers, turning away and closing his eyes. 

“You are not going to hurt my friends!” Amanda screams, her demonic eyes popping out. Riley turns around and notices both demons behind them. Sophie is about to scream but Riley puts their hand over her mouth. 

“It’s okay… just lend them a bit of your power… please?” Riley pleads. They turn back to the screen. Wooly starts transforming too.

“Just... give us… five minutes… okay?” Wooly says, as if he’s trying to calm them down. The tape falls out of the machine. 

“Wait no!” Sophie cries, lunging towards it and catching it in her hands. “But…” 

“I wonder if the show’s censors would react badly to all the blood?” Riley wonders. “Or maybe Amanda and Wooly don’t want us to watch them in those forms? Or something?” 

“Still… what if they lose?” 

“They won’t. It’s Amanda and Wooly we’re talking about.” Riley says. So they chose to wait. It was the longest, most awkward five minutes of their lives. (Sitting in silence with the demons). Amanda’s was sleeping with it's head on Riley's lap, in fact Riley was surprised that it let them pet it. 

“It’s like a giant cat.” Riley whispers. “When it’s not trying to kill you…” Finally they decided to put the tape back into the VCR. When they did the whole room was covered in blood and Amanda and Wooly were panting in exhaustion. I guess the whole blood censorship theory was wrong. Riley deduces. 

“You think we did it?” Wooly asks. 

“I don’t think he can get any deader than that…” 

“I can’t believe we did that…” 

“I know. You were feral, Wooly.” 

“Don’t ever say that again.” Wooly grumbles. “I guess I just had a lot of pent up rage to let out.” 

“Maybe we should buy a punching bag then…” 

“Maybe…” 

“We should probably go home and get cleaned up before we finish shopping huh?” 

“Yeah… I feel like if I see any more blood today I’m gonna faint.” 

“Wooly I think that’s from the blood loss… hmm… I guess we should get you stitched up huh?” as Amanda says this, Sophie notices the pair are in rough shape… but the tape stopped glitching for some reason. “You too opossum. Thanks for your help today.” Amanda adds. The tape pans in the opossum laying in the corner like he’s playing dead, giving Amanda a weak thumbs up. 

“I don’t wanna go to the hospital…” Wooly groans. Amanda rolls her eyes. The tape changes to their bathroom. Wooly and the opossum are sitting in the tub while Amanda is sorting through the first aid kit. The tape changes again and Amanda is now in a different outfit, tossing her bloodied clothes into the hamper. The world seems brighter and the animation is much smoother than it’s ever been. The tape changes again to Amanda wrapping Wooly’s hand up in bandages while Wooly sits on the toilet with the cover down. 

“I don’t know what possessed you to catch that knife with your bare hands, but don’t do anything that stupid again you scared the s*** out of me!” 

“But it was cool right?” Wooly asks, sounding almost drunk. 

“Sure… it was cool Wooly. Just don’t do it again.” 

“Don’t go being about to get chopped in half again and I won’t.” he replies, swaying a little. 

“I don’t plan on it.” Amanda sighs. She helps Wooly off the toilet. “Are you okay to stand?” 

“I’m fiiiiine!” he laughs before immediately slipping in water and falling on his face. He then just lay there laughing for a bit.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with him honestly.” Amanda says, looking directly at the screen. She helps Wooly up. “Maybe we should just skip shopping?” she suggests. 

“Noooo… I’m fine!” Wooly pouts. He does not look fine. Riley walks up and smacks the TV. Wooly shakes his head really hard and blinks a couple times. “What was I doing again?” 

“Wooly, are you feeling okay?” 

“Yeah I’m fine. Why?” Wooly answers, sounding completely normal now. 

“How did that work?”

“So are we going shopping or…”  “I am so confused… but uh… yeah shopping!” the tape changes to outside again with all the stores lined up. The butcher’s is noticeably missing. “Can you tell me where the store is?” Amanda asks. Riley clicks on it. “That’s right!” they enter the store. “Okay so on our list we need peaches, apples, bread-” “Peanut butter.” 

“Yes Wooly, peanut butter. Bubble bath…” “What about two-in-one peanut butter and bubble bath?” Riley jokes. 

“What?” Amanda looks at them with complete confusion. 

“No.” Wooly says in a deadpan tone. 

“It’s hysterical.” Riley laughs, elbowing Amanda’s unamused demon. 

“You have guts I’ll give you that.” Sophie sighs. 

“Can you get us all the items on our list?” Amanda asks. Sophie pushes Riley out of the way and clicks on everything. Peaches, apples, bread, peanut butter, bubble bath.

“We also should get some more peach jam while we’re here.” 

“You and your peach jam.” Amanda rolls her eyes. Sophie clicks on the peach jam. 

“Do we need anything else today?” 

“Not from here.” Amanda shrugs, pulling out her list. “We need eggs from the farm for breakfast… you still eat eggs right Wooly?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Cool. So eggs… hmm… maybe we can get some bacon from the farmer…” 

“Have you learned NOTHING?” Wooly snaps. 

“Guess not huh? So… no more meat from now on… guess that’s fine… then I think eggs are the last thing on our list for the day.” 

“The last thing on the list for my day is a glass of warm milk and SLEEP.” Wooly groans leaning over backwards dramatically. 

“Milk! I almost forgot. I think we can get some at the farm too, right?” Amanda asks.

“I don’t caaaare let’s just get this over with.” 

“Why are you so bored all of the sudden?” Amanda’s eyes widen in realization. “Wait… is this because we got your peanut butter? Now you have no interest in this trip?” Wooly looks away and doesn’t answer. Amanda looks at him with annoyance. She grabs his arm and drags him to the farm. 

“Let’s tell the Scarecrow what we need!” Amanda announces. The tape pans to the motionless smiling scarecrow farmer once again. Wait… how did the farmer shear Wooly anyway? Sophie wonders then decides it’s best not to overthink a kids show, regardless of its origins. Riley types in wool.

“We already have plenty of that from the last episode.” Wooly pouts. “I’m only back to normal since you're rewatching old episodes!” I don’t get how that works but okay. Sophie thinks. 

“What are you even talking about? What happened?” Riley asks.

“Wooly got sheared.” Amanda answers. 

“Oh ho ho! I need to hear more about this.” 

“Quit teasing them!” Sophie scolds.

“No you don’t! Just answer the dang question!” Wooly shouts, seeming kind of bashful about the whole thing. Riley rolls their eyes and types in eggs. The scarecrow no-clips off screen and then just appears back in with eggs. Amanda grins, wildly amused by this. 

“I much prefer the Scarecrow to the butcher.” she giggles. “What else do we need?” Riley types in milk. “We need regular milk and kitten milk please.” Amanda says. Suddenly the Scarecrow starts making noise like one of the adults in the Peanuts holiday specials. “No you cannot have your cat back. She’s mine and I love her. Though…” she glares at the tv, “none of you have given me name ideas for her yet!” 

“How did you understand that?” Wooly asks, thoroughly confused. The Scarecrow sheds a tear and disappears once again, returning with some milk and kitten milk. 

“Can we get some more cat food too please?” Amanda asks. The Scarecrow disappears and reappears again. “Thank you! Have a great day!” the tape changes back to home. Where Amanda realizes the opossum is trying to eat the kitten. She separates them immediately. 

“Bad opossum bad! This kitten is not food!” Amanda scolds holding the opossum at arms length in one arm and the kitten close to her chest in the other. The opossum hisses at her and she gives him a death glare. He shuts up. She drops him on the floor and he scampers behind Wooly. 

“I don’t know what you're expecting from me. I still want you dead.” Wooly admits in the most flat, emotionless voice ever. The opossum slowly backs away. 

“My poor baby? Did he hurt you? Oh he must’ve frightened you so much! He’s a bad bad bad opossum! Don’t worry! I will never ever ever let that terrible creature anywhere or any other dangers bring harm to a hair on your little head you understand me? You are mama’s little girl. Yes you are. Yes you are. My precious little baby.” Amanda says in a babyish voice, coddling the cat to bits with kisses and snuggles. 

“She didn’t react that way when the opossum attacked me earlier.” Wooly scoffed. The kitten hisses and scratches Amanda’s face before kicking away and jumping to the floor. She isn’t even phased. She doesn’t even look mad. She turns to Wooly and smirks. 

“Oh Wooly… are you jealous?” Amanda asks. 

“Not… particularly.” 

“Oh poor Wooly! Feeling all left out cause Amanda isn’t paying attention to him.” Amanda continues the baby voice routine. “Okay stop that.” 

“Don’t worry Wooly, I can protect you too! You’re my very precious special best friend after all.” 

“This is weird. You know this is weird.” Wooly says, looking incredibly disturbed. Amanda gives him a big hug. “Get off me. I’m not your cat.” “Of course not! You’re my favorite sheep!” 

“That’s it.” Wooly grumbles shoving Amanda off him. She immediately bursts out laughing. 

“Oh my gosh teasing you is the best Wooly!” 

“Yeah whatever… I’m gonna go… do something.” 

“Yeah like what?” 

“I don’t know… I don’t care… all I know is that bedtime can’t come soon enough…” Wooly groans, going to walk off. 

“You know, you’ve been a really great friend lately, Wooly…”

“Where is this coming from?” Wooly asks, completely caught off guard. 

“I was struggling and feeling really bad and you were there for me this time.” 

“Yeah?” 

“So thank you Wooly.” 

“You’re… welcome? I guess?” Wooly replies, sounding completely confused. Amanda smiles at him. 

“Before you go, wanna… close out the Amandathon with me?” 

“Sure…” 

“Well everyone that’s it for the Amandathon! Thanks for tuning in! Catch your pal Amanda…” “And you’re best friend Wooly next time on Hameln Jr!” 

“Oh man. That was nostalgic.”

“You can say that again.”

“Oh man. That was nostalgic.” 

“I didn’t mean that literally.” 

“I know. That should be enough material for old tapes right guys?” Amanda asks. 

“Yep.” 

“Okay then! Thanks for playing with us!” Amanda grins. 

“See you next time!” Wooly beams. The tape falls out of the VCR.

Authors Note: Okay so from now on these tapes are gonna have very little continuity. I might keep the fantape lore in some of them because it's so fun but yeah... I have no idea how the Amanda series is gonna end and thus have no idea how to end this fic series. So from now on it's going to be the silly adventures of Amanda and Wooly! This will probably be the longest fic of the series, so I hope you enjoy. PLEASE LET ME KNOW THINGS YOU NOTICED AND YOUR FAV PARTS IN THE COMMENTS! THANKS TO ALL WHO ENJOYED THIS SERIES THUS FAR. I'll still prolly write some fics here and there... just... for funsies. Ya know?

BTW WHAT ARE WE NAMING THE CAT I STILL HAVEN'T GOTTEN SUGGESTIONS!

Anywho have a nice day and a lovely holidays if you celebrate any!

[gyeomsweetgyeom]

[11:19 am]

(cw: f!reader, surprise genre hehehe)

Doyoung's breath catches in his throat at the sight of you. You looked gorgeous, he always thought so but today... today you looked ethereal, like an angel. The flowy material of your dress makes you look like you came down from heaven to grace him especially with your presence.

"Doyoung," you breathe out, looking up at him through your eyelashes. Your eyes are wide with surprise, eyelids sparkling with the glitter dabbed across your eyelids.

Doyoung feels his breath hitch in his throat, his heart pounding so hard and fast he fears it might jump out of his chest. "You look... you- wow." He stutters out, his cheeks flushing with surprise and admiration.

The bridal party hustles around the small room behind you, a flutter of sage green chiffon and small bouquets of flowers. You step outside the door and shut it quietly behind you, not wanting your bridesmaid to know you're with him. "What are you doing here?" You ask nervously, fingering fumbling with the lace of your veil.

"I wanted to see you," Doyoung answers softly.

"No, Doyoung. I mean what are you doing here. You weren't invited," you reply coldly.

Ex-boyfriend!Doyoung sighs, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans. What was he doing here? He was supposed to be out of the country by now or at least 10,000 feet in the sky. He didn't want to be anywhere near this event! Yet, here he was. After hearing that one of your mutual friends was coming last week, he'd known he wasn't going to actually be on his flight.

He found the same friend, found a selfie they'd posted on their story, and narrowed down the venue to a few different places. He got lucky that he got it right on the first try.

He runs a hand down his face, "I wanted to talk to you. See how you were doing, hopefully- hopefully..."

"Hopefully what? Change my mind? Convince me to leave my fiance?" You question while crossing your arms across your chest defensively.

"Not that, I just... I can't let you do this. I can't let you marry someone else, we belong together," Doyoung explained, reaching for your hands with a hopeful look in his eye.

You pushed his hands away, "no, you don't get to let me do anything. We're not together and we haven't been for 4 years. We've barely talked in all that time and you decide that the day I'm getting married is the day to try to make amends? What is wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with me?" Doyoung repeats as he feels his throat get thick, "What's wrong with me is that I've been miserable since we broke up!"

You sigh tiredly to keep yourself calm, "I broke up with you. Do you know why?"

"It was the wrong moment for us. We were always going to come back to each other. We're soulmates," Doyoung stammers out.

"No, I broke up with you because you couldn't compromise. You refused to make changes in the life we were building together to benefit the both of us. It was your way or the highway and I was tired of forcing myself to be who you wanted me to be. I'm not leaving with you, I'm not leaving my fiance for you, I'm not ever going to force myself to make a decision that you've already made for me ever again. I'm happy, I'm marrying the love of my life and he's not you," you tell Doyoung in a calm, collected voice.

You'd dreamt of this moment since you both broke up and he refused to acknowledge the truth. He refused to believe that he was the problem or could ever be a problem in general. Every couple of months he'd reach out, trying to rekindle things, but when you tried to address the issue, he deflected and the conversation became useless. After a couple pointless conversations, you stopped replying, stopped holding out hope for change. You allowed yourself time to heal, to get out there, meet new people, and fall in love with someone who was the human embodiment of your better half.

One of your bridesmaid opens the door, a surprised, "oh" ringing out in the tense silence between you and Doyoung. "It's time to head out for the first look," she tells you quietly.

You nod, looking Doyoung in the eye, "Bye, Doyoung."

He knows that if he speaks, he'll barely be able to get any words out with the knot he feels in his throat, so he just nods. He walks away, blinking rapidly to try to keep himself from breaking down and bawling like a baby. As he leaves, he spots your fiance with his groomsmen. He can see the radiant smile on his face and hear how excited he is, hear the way he gushes about you in a way Doyoung doesn't remember doing himself.

[cowboyjen68]

Hello, Jen! I hope you’re having a lovely day today. 💞

I’m not sure if you’ve ever experienced this, but I feel like there’s a specific kind of loneliness that comes with being a lesbian. Having a sexuality that stems from the absence of men makes me feel very removed from other people, sometimes even other queer people. Have you ever felt that way? How do you handle that? As much as I love being a lesbian, sometimes I yearn to be attracted to men just so I feel a little less lonely.

I would say I have felt the isolation and loneliness you are talking about even in LGBT+ spaces.

In high school many of the girls around me were "boy crazy" and they were at once made to feel bad for that and praised. It was weird to me as I watched them talk about how great boys were only to also hear them in secret being grossed our OR worse, scared of the boys they publicly "chased".

Since I felt the no real need get the attention of boys but knew it was expected I thought it was a phase. That we were all like of faking it until the attraction was real. That set me up to very often second guess any feelings of sexuality towards women, thinking it was me misinterpreting the way everything was supposed to play out.

As I got older most of my friends in college were gay men or women who dated women but did NOT use lesbian and almost all of them them went on to marry men while the gay men continued on as gay men. This made me feel like perhaps I was the odd one out. I did have an RA who was out and open but I was skeptical I could ever be as brave or confident in my sexuality as she was. What happens if I too was in a phase and had to leave behind any woman I formed a relationship with only to grow up and marry a man?

I literally was waiting for the "phase" my mom and my peers and media was telling me I was in to finally end. Thankfully (because I LOVE being a lesbian) it was not a phase. The phase we being unsure and repressed about it.

The good news that I can impart from experience is that the more lesbians you meet the more you see that you are not alone and we can experience different things and still deeply connect on our sexuality. It gets less lonely as you get more life under your belt and truly love your sexuality as a lesbian for things that media can't explain but other lesbians can. The deep connection to women, the intimacy that is mutual and so warm it makes your entire body and mind content while in each other's arms.

I used to want to be straight just because it looked easier and safer. Now I would take on hell or high water to stay just as a I am.

[macknshift]

THE ONE WHERE . . . I INTRODUCE Y'ALL TO LEO!

SOOOO…i have mentioned leo in like, 90 different posts atp and never actually made a "leo intro" (mainly bc i have weird feelings ab sharing him heavily to the rest of the world lol) but! i figured now would be the best time to get into explaining him to y'all.

LEO , commonly given the last name SCOTT (depends on the dr!) is actually originally the main character's love interest in a hockey romance book i've been in the process of writing. after getting #sickandtired of annoying ass book men i gave up and began drafting one of my own. the main character is literally me (i mean, for christ's sake her name is sloane mackintosh,) and eventually, i began thinking of him in other "au"s (i used to do this a lot on wattpad - i mean DRs but the term AU is usually more digestible to ppl that may not be aware of reality shifting. Anyways.) and began kind of placing him in everything. a list of the drs he is my love interest in is follows;

BETTER CR : (fc silasj2004*) the hockey romance book pretty much as a dr. small changes occur but basically he's the exact same as leo in the book lol

PARENT DR : (fc jack schlossberg. yes. i am one of those girlies. i am not ashamed! at least he has morals + a backbone y'all this could be much worse) the "backstory" is my better cr dr. i'm now a mother of 3 (amelia or mimi, aged 5, giselle or gigi, aged 4 and i'm pregnant with vincenzo, our final kid,) and it follows our life after what would be the events of the book. i sort-of made it also as like a WAG dr in a sense bc leo is a professional hockey player! (but he retires 2 years before this point in time so idk where my thought process is w this lol)

FORMULA 1 DRIVER DR : (fc pato o'ward MY!!!! mclaren man ln4 U ARE NOTHINGGGGGGG) leonardo dempsey, son of actor patrick dempsey (my forever celebrity crush ugh he's so fine) and driver for aston martin aramco f1 team under #99. i essentially took l*nce str*ll's daddy's boy backstory and gave it to leo bc he is indeed a daddy's boy. the only dr leo and i are enemies to lovers bc i'm too obsessed w him otherwise LMFAO

MARVEL DR : (fc marcello hernandez (MY MAAANNNN)) leo scott, secretly the speedster superhero 'comet'. hired by my dad as essentially a bodyguard (leo's not intimidating AT ALL idek how the hell this is supposed to work LMFAO) as comet and knows me out of costume as his sister's roommate (mj is also in every dr ever and actually is here in this cr. i can never leave her out i love her DOWN) basically marichat vibes (god i miss marichat)

POP STAR DR : (fc marcello hernandez, again) leo sinatra, nepo baby great-grandson of frank sinatra (there's a whole, incredibly large bit of lore ab this LMFAO + he's also a great-grandson in my better cr dr too bc i need my man RICH!) and Saturday Night Live cast member. basically i go on snl and immediately fall in love. i've stolen the 'unlikely couple' weekend update sketch for us & he does domingo, which is my song lol we're funny for it idk

THE FCS, in color photos:

i'm missing like, 18 other drs that i can think of but some important info about him;

he's half oaxacan mexican. i've tried my damnedness to find a way to make it obvious but when i was 'designing' him (aka drawing him out) i used jack, silas (*NOTE: he is leo's typical fc if i don't have an designated one for him) and marcello as references to make him look the most like him as i can. the fcs are kind of loose for him but i need a way to like fully visualize him. so. yeah. his 'color palette' (weird way to put it but idk how else) makes him tanner than all three of them i fear. all of the fcs i use (other than jack schlossberg but like. idk his main celebrity lookalike in the better cr is him so i kind of had to) are latino, but i feel like it never ever properly translates when i talk about him bc his name is fucking leopold scott. like. huh.

he's also tall AS FUCK lol and built like a tank lowkey (think tom welling clark kent GOOD GOOGLY MOOGLY) but it's mainly bc he's a hockey player. in every vers he's like. 6'3. shortest he is is w marcello as his fc and even then he's 5'11. (note in pop star dr he gets a lot of comparisons to jacob elordi for some reason??? idk my fans are weird)

he's got big brown baby cow eyes. every. single. time. like that is this man's defining trait and you know what? i would not change that for the world lol

his position in hockey is a goalie! he uses the number #29 and plays for our college and later for the new jersey devils before being traded to the anaheim ducks. after he retires he becomes a firefighter!!!! (which is sooo hot btw)

[goldenticketcharlie]

I’ve decided I am not going to hold back the way I do on the app medium. I am going to unleash myself here. Not holding back, giving zero fucks how I sound or how weird I am. Put it on me. Forgoing grammar, forgoing explanations.

I was made to be weird. I was made to be different, it is a part of me. I hope my people hear me.

This is for those who are awake, you will understand my words and know.

There is a calling happening, a reckoning, it has been happening for years, my mind is coming into its full strength, the words are making sense, the visions connecting and seeing clearly. Thank you God.

I am less than, I am not perfect, I have broken all the rules. I have gone sideways when I was supposed to go up or down. I tore thru the veil and hid. Heaven is here, and if you’re not careful you will miss it. Life is filled with Easter eggs, go and find them, and when you do, you’ve found your path, you have become the Easter egg to someone else. Find your god, do not harm yourself or another, this is not god. Find all the best parts of your religion, God is there.

I have called upon the auras and they have been let out into the world, your prayers will work, at least the ones that to do not hurt another, they work faster than you ever thought possible, miracles will unfold before your eyes. Listen and do not harm. Call for protection, imagine what it looks like, how beautiful it is. Imagine your beauty, imagine, the smell of your hair, the color of your eyes, the ways your ears look. Details matter. Let your imagination run wild, draw, create and show another.

Once you have awakened, keep playing the charade, you are now the main character on stage of your life. Keep pretending, keep leaving Easter eggs for someone else to find. Protect your children at all costs. There is intense evil here, players of the game as well. Design your children’s armor, call it into being. Let them create, let them have fun. Protecting them at all costs.

I will leave you with 3 simple instructions at the end of the day.

1. Clean up.

2. Put them to bed.

3. Go outside.

Godspeed my friend, I will write when inspiration strikes.