#i know its meant to be for fun and a lot of ppl will be happy no matter what they receive
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puppppppppy · 1 year ago
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its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously
#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to#im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but#because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of#exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something#and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh#and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing#because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant#even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still#its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about#I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird#maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel#a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t#I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to#be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol#idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week#had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting#yapping#does this count as vent#vent#Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly
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bibleofficial · 22 days ago
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i’m myself at home, me in public, & i runs it all
#stream#my psychiatrist says i may have adhd he also said ‘im not going to lie to u ur not an easy case bc there’s a lot of symptoms’#ALSKALSKLASKALSKLAKSALSLAJSLAKSLA#i was like ‘adhd ? i don’t have that’ & he asked like ‘nobody has every said that ?’ & i was like no ????? im just insane on the inside like#ALSJALSJALSJLAJSLA literally i went ‘i don’t think that ppl w ahdh online say they can’t tie their shoes & i don’t think it’s the disorder i#think they’re just refusing to tie their shoes’ then later on he asked me how do i feel about myself in one word & i went#‘like a sea urchin’ & he had no idea what that meant#like i thought it was quite obvious ????#nice to look at but u don’t want to step on 1 or that sucks also they’re sooo pretty but Need to Stay Way the Hell Over There’#he was reading the notes i sent to him bc i asked for my notes & i was like ‘ive comments’ ALSKALSKALKSALKSALSKLKSLKSLAKSL#he started laughing & it was bc of the way i phrased things & capitalized ? 😭😭😭 he told me that ALSKALSKLAKSLAKSLAKSLA#it’s very fucking funny#like u just need to read it like german#he’s polish so i trust him w my life#POLES DO ANYTHING FOR YALL !!!!!!!#like even w that 1 facist 1 i still think abt him i forget his name is was smthg funny but its like yea u look it#like this psych has a normal name but he fits it#GOOD WAY#NOT A FASC#HES POLITE & FUN idk he’s soft spoken & i find that very calming#i sound like u know the sound they play when a cat fight happens in a cartoon that’s my voice#also unrelated but my accent has finally changed so much that the british assume i’ve been here since childhood …. growth like my parents#immigrated to britain …. the chameleon trait#i think it’s so funny bc like if u Are Like That then it’ll work for any language like if u speak spanish spanish & u go to mexico spanish#ur spanish accent will change to be more mexican i think language is crazy isn’t society cool#this doesn’t work for everyone like some people will retain their accents their entire lives like u know ‘bad accents’ i hate the term ‘bad#accent’ bc an accent can’t be bad it can just be strong or weak#like girl. most ppl have an accent. like some people omg if ur a professional translator u can get SOOOOO GOOD WHERE U LOSE THE ORIGINAL ITS#CRAZY#truly
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snekdood · 3 months ago
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not sure who needs to hear this but i do not see myself as above anyone, like, at all. if something I posted makes you think I think I am you're probably misreading it or my intentions. I dont feel the need to compare myself and make myself feel like i'm above people, i'm just not really that kind of person. in fact, people make a point of constantly trying to make me feel below them on here so dont worry, you don't gotta help em'.
#literally. feel free to send me an ask on anon 'what i meant' by anything. literally ever. i will gladly elaborate.#id rather you get it from me than someones wild interpretation of what i'm saying anyways.#a lot of the times when im trying to put myself on a pedestal i'm playing a character...... which im realizing now isnt immediately#recognizable for people who dont anything about my art..... uhm. well. so. i have a character. thats a jackass. and is my self insert.#but he wasnt always my self insert. but he is now. but he has always been a jackass even when i wasnt nearly as much#and since im still in the beginning of my comic in many ways im still holding on to that asshole version bc thats what hes like in#the beginning but i do actually have the wisdom and lived experience to know hes a jackass and that i dont want him to be#like that and he was always supposed to grow out of it ever since i first conceived of this comic- so in a way i hold on to it as a method#acting kind of thing. on the other hand its just a really funny persona to me. but its only really funny if you know its in the context#of a persona and thats not actually how i feel about the thing like im not actually being that extreme about it prolly sdjhfdvshjsfhvd#its the kind of persona you love to act bc you love to make fun of and mock that kind of person yknow?#idk how to explain it. but. rest assured that im probably just in my persona mode and hes very sassy and snarky and an ass#🤷 what can ya do#i also maybe put it on at bad times and not realize it and for that im sorry >_>#THAT would be bc of the bpd. and thats not me grasping for sympathy at all im speaking purely on facts.#bpd tends to make ppl express 'incorrectly' at the wrong times and yeah etc etc
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erythristicbones · 6 months ago
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my sudden overwhelming desire to do lil 500x500 pixel arts for attacks on artfight bc i miss pixel art VS my fear that ppl will be disappointed to receive that when the vast majority of my previous attacks are fully shaded fullbodies w/ relatively nice backgrounds FIGHT
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phagodyke · 7 months ago
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ykw actually I am angry + disappointed w them. I've been pushing how I feel aside and trying to make it my own fault so it's all contained but I think theyve just been mean. and they really should know me better ik I try to pretend I don't expect more from them so I feel less hurt when they do things that upset me but we've been friends for years by this point. like come on.
#just got home and went to put my shit away but my flatmate was in the kitchen and i got suddenly so mad i had to walk back out#not going to do or say anything while im this upset. i need to be a lot calmer before i can even be in the same room as her#like okay. so originally it was just the two of them getting drinks and theyd rather it was just them bc i dont drink. thats cool#it wouldve been difficult for me to join them after work bc travel. and ik theyd done this before just the 2 of them and had fun#i can fully respect that its why i said no and stuck by that decision when she asked again#but to not mention she was taking the day off work and btw i just found out that BOTH of our other old flatmates joined in too#to not mention that they were travelling that entire distance and that it wasnt just drinks it was a whole day out together#thats just mean. why wouldnt you tell me that why did none of them say anything.#and the fact they did the exact same fucking thing last weekend too i didnt know about that at all#like i need to stop trying to justify it. im allowed to feel unwanted and excluded bc thats exactly what theyre doing.#im tired of feeling like other people dont want me around. i know i can be difficult and annoying sometimes. but im really not that bad#and we're meant to be friends!!!!!! like youre supposed to like your friends. and want to spend time with them. or at least i do#and yeah everyones annoying sometimes thats just part of being alive ur supposed to tolerate it if ur friends#im allowed to want to feel like im wanted. im allowed to want ppl to care abt me. that shouldnt be too much to ask for#but the overwhelming message im getting at the moment is they dont want me around. and when i am around them i feel like they dont listen#to me and that they dont really care how i feel unless it directly involves them or theyre responsible for it#i feel like they dont see me as a real person that exists. only a version they have in their heads and they base all their assumptions and#decisions off that version instead of directly communicating with me. and constantly avoid me under the guise of 'giving me space'#when im upset or having a difficult time and most need support from other people. i just feel really unseen#and ik that part of how i feel IS exacerbated by insecurity and depression. like they do care to some degree#but also a lot of it is evidenced in the way they act towards me. mainly my roommate bc shes the person i interact with most#and personally i find the most direct ways of showing u care abt someone are showing up for them. and making them feel seen#and maybe not everyone feels the same way. but thats how it works for me anyway#so to repeatedly exclude me and avoid acknowledging that ive been having a difficult time is the opposite of that to me#which is the point im trying to arrive at... sorry ik ive probably said similar things repeatedly the last few weeks but i feel like its#crystallising a bit like this is the core reason why im so sensitive and reactive atm and why i got so upset by it#idk. not tonight bc im still very emotionally raw but maybe tomorrow if im calmer i should explain that i was upset + why to her#i avoid doing that so often when im upset bc i dont think theres much point in having a conversation abt it unless u expect some kind of#resolution from it. or if you want an apology but idrc abt being apologised to the crucial thing is what theyre going to do different#and i love her but shes very resistant to changing her behaviour bc of other ppl being upset by it. and like i said before she has
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llycaons · 2 years ago
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this is definitely bc I'm coming at it as a fan of the live action and not the book it is just so bizarre to see lwj presented as a super experienced and confident and suave sex expert right out of the gate. it just goes against all my perceptions of him as a character. except confidence maybe. to be clear he is horny and all I just don't think he'd really get very far with anyone beside wwx
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moldy-flowers · 4 months ago
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NOOOOOOOOOOO
Tsunade: Fully believes in Narutos abilities and has full faith he will be a great Hokage, the best, even.
Konoha public: "Hey what if we made Naruto the sixth Hokage :3"
Tsunade: "what the FUCK are you talking about I watched him cry over a picture of Sasuke yesterday he is NOT prepared for that yet make Kakashi do it"
#LET THE BOYS BE BOYS#STOP SHIPPING THEM#LET THEM RECOVER FROM THEIR TRAUMA FIRST PLEASE‼️‼️‼️ THEY ARENT READY FOR LOVE TILL THEY LOVE THEMSELVES‼️‼️#I should have known not everyone would see them as silly brothers#Should have made it like a kitten or something and not Sasuke#Sigh I've reaped what I sewed#Sometimes I gen forget that like 50% of the fandom ships sns...#This must be what the non NaruMitsu shippers feel in the Ace attorney fandom...#Am I... my own worst enemy...?#Okay but like tbf Edgeworth and Phoenix are literally just like that#Sasuke and Naruto are just a little co-dependant and a lot a lot obsessive#See I want to fist fight the sns shippers but its so hard bc I like get it. like ik that I personally wud go that far for a friend but like#Like i can't even go “Hey ur interpreting that wrong” bc like who am I do judge how ppl interpret things that i didn't write#Like Ik that that's not how Kishimoto meant it but I hate beating on ppls ships bc like ship who you want when u want just bc like#I don't personally don't like it doesn't mean anyone should stop for me like who the hell even am I??#BUT I DID WRITE THIS POST AND I SAY ITS NOT SNS#But hey just for fun let's say it's SuiSasu#Hmmmmm and maybe it's Naruto x Toneri#Maybe it's Tobirama x Izuna??#We'll never know#BUT WHAT WE DO KNOW IS THAT ITS NOT SNS#Sigh i can't wait till I get over my grudge on sns#Life will be so much happier#Idek why It makes me so angry#God's pls hear my plea and let me make peace with this ship#Like no other naruto ship makes me mad except for this one#I'm even okay with SasuHina and like ShiSaku#Like I don't like them but I'm at peace#WHY am I not at peace with the most popular ship in the fandom this is so unfair#somebody undo this curse on me pleaseeeee
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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 1 month ago
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I've been trying to focus on thinking about things I enjoy about the idea of the TWST anime. And regarding overblots, I think an anime version would really help illustrate (even more) how terrifying the process is. I really like how the manga shows Riddle's OB, and I love anime as a medium, so I'm pretty hyped to see how it will be conveyed in it.
I really hope they accentuate the horror of it- I'm aware that they might not go all in w the horror like I would personally like, but the thought still excites me. What kind of music will they play? Will the animation change like it does in some animes when the characters are distressed (wobbly lines, glitchy effects)...? What sort of directions will the voice actors get? I mean, they already voiced the game, but anime gives them more room to do voice stuff. I'm really hyped for this aspect tbh...
And I'm also excited for the possibility of dubs, since I'm quite a fan of the whole dubbing world. (I know some ppl have their fears about this last possibility, but in my case even if it turns out to not be so good, I think we could still have a good time w something like that. Plus I've seen some popular eng dub actors hyped about the anime and wanting to be casted for certain characters)
I also wanted to apologize for my previous ask ᕙ⁠(⁠⇀⁠‸⁠↼⁠‶⁠)⁠ᕗ I already did so in the comments, but I felt bad about doomposting on your inbox. My mind's first reaction is usually to see the negative first and become anxious, and it's something I'm working on, but it sometimes goes out of hand. But now that a bit has passed, and specially thanks to your advice, I can sit down and try to focus on the things that excite me rather than the ones that scare me. Sure, building too much expectation could backfire at the end— but as you said, we have little to no information at this point. So I think focusing on the things I'd like to see is a better usage of my time. If they turn out to disappoint me... That's something I'll worry about next year, I'll suppose. I'm still a bit anxious and scared, but there's also lots of things I'm hyped for. I'll try to take your advice and focus on those. 🫂 Sorry if my previous negativity made you uncomfortable.
[Referencing this news! Asker’s prior post here.]
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I’ve seen a lot of fans speculating that the OB transformation sequences will resemble magical girl ones! While that’s a fun idea, I do feel like it makes more sense for the anime to portray OB as something scary and all-consuming, similar to how it is depicted at the end of animated dorm commercials and in the manga. For the characters experiencing them, it’s not meant to be glamorous… All that agony, the dripping ink leaking out of their orifices and dripping like blood. Overblot looks incredibly horrific, and I think that should come through in the animation—whether they change the usual style for these segments or keep it the same.
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I think the anime would reuse (or maybe do remastered versions of?) the Twst soundtrack for a lot of the show. The compositions are already there, so might as well. Maybe experiencing the anime will help to make the music more memorable, since it seems the game soundtrack alone isn’t doing it for some fans.
No clue about the JP voice cast; I did see some people worrying that they could replace the game’s voice cast for the anime, but as I’ve mentioned already, that’s an unfounded claim. If the usual VAs are there, surely they won’t just reuse the already recorded lines from the game?? 😂 I’d think they’d at least have to rerecord those based on how the script and its scenes are laid out, plus additional dialogue to fill in the gaps (such as new scenes).
No confirmation of an English (or other language) dubs yet either! (Again, this is another topic related to the anime that sparks worry, but I must stress that it’s pointless to get into a tizzy about something that isn’t concrete yet.) But yes, I’ve already seen English VAs expressing interest in certain characters; Daman Mills wants to audition for Malleus, Alejandro Saab has made it known he has Twst on his radar and wants to voice Leona, etc. (The latter has done Twst dorm leader impressions for fun before; I think Mr. Saab could make for a decent Leona or even Malleus!)
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Don't worry about the previous ask ^^ I think it's better that we discuss these things with one another rather than post or tweet into the void and allow those negative feelings to fester. If you want to view it in a different way, think of it like the OB boys actually getting therapy/finding someone to confide in instead of being allowed to stew in their own emotions and risking OB a second time. Sometimes all it takes is that gentle nudge or a reminder to step back and take a deep breath. When we let our emotions get the best of us, we end up thinking and acting in irrational ways, and then that can lead to people--whether yourself or others--getting hurt.
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bratphilia · 1 year ago
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── ★ ˙ strawberry charm ̟ !!
note ✧.*‎  hello hello hello welcome to scream meets fnaf. randomly got this idea after rewatching scream, like, why don't i combine one both franchises in the only way i know how? william afton as ghostface coming into your house and fucking the shit out of you!! and here we are. i spent a lot more time on this than i usually do writing fics so i seriously hope ppl enjoy it. i'm also on break starting today so i'll be pumping out more content from now on going into the new year!
pairing ✧.*‎‎ steve raglan / william afton x reader
cw ✧.*‎‎ college au and scream au, reader is college aged, william is her robotics professor, ghostface!william afton, reader is girly, vibrators, multiple orgasms, perversion, mentions of stalking, descriptions of gore, choking, consensual non consent, break-in, approximately one lick to the pussy, rough sex, dumbification, glove kink, slapping, slight daddy kink, cockwarming
taglist ✧.*‎‎ @dilfity @kissingrhi @iikyutee @ghoulsgraveyard @cemeteryry @gh0stsp1d3r
synopsis ✧.*‎ a man calls you up wondering what your favorite scary movie is.
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you hold back a deep sigh at the low-quality horror movie being showed on the big screen in front of you. no, it's not the most important thing in the world, to see something "cinematically excellent" every time you go to the theater, but shit, wouldn't that be nice? anyways, that's not what you're here for. you're here for a date with this guy in your robotics class, specifically. 
he's handsy, but so are you. one arm is slung around your shoulder, you're cuddled against his chest, knees drawn upwards, and his other hand coming around to rub circles on your thigh. yes, it's your first date together, after weeks of study "dates." yes, you were cuddling, very heavy emphasis on pda. what about it? it made up for this movie being fucking terrible, so why not. 
you have to laugh. nico, your date, had promised chills and shivers up your spine and hoped for your head pushed into his shoulder at the scary parts of the movie. rotten luck for him. you want to laugh at that. and you accidentally snicker, causing him to look towards you. "what?"
"oh, nothing," you say, nodding back towards the movie. 
he says nothing, thank god. 
finally, there's a good part of the movie. the main character, a ditzy blonde with big tits is tied to a tree while the film's slasher rips her boyfriend's head from his body with a chainsaw. your muscles clench, not in fear, but in delight. you've always been a sucker for gore. and fuck, it gets something else clenching too. you seriously wonder if nico can feel you throbbing when he rests his hand under your chin, gently forcing you to look at him. he leans in for a kiss. no tongue, just lips to lips. it's nice. you notice he put on chapstick and you can taste the buttery popcorn on his mouth. 
however, you're interrupted by the creaking of a chair behind you. the sound of someone getting up and leaving. you didn't pull away in time to catch their face, but the noise frankly startled you than any other part of the movie. 
the film ended shortly after that. no, the person who left never did end up returning to their seat behind you, but that had long since left your mind anyways. nico drove you home in his silver convertible, the top down creating a nice breeze through your hair. the car ride was silent but content. date successful, in your opinion, shitty movie aside. 
"well, goodnight," he says when your door is barely cracked open and you're halfway inside. you silently leaned up on your tippy toes and pecking his lips once more. you ignore the crackle of twigs in the foliage surrounding your house, blaming it on the wind. 
the door shut behinds you. you live in a campus house, but your roommates just so happen to be out of the house for the weekend. this has meant nothing but trouble for you — meaning you snuck your friend lacey's vibrator out of its drawer and had yourself some fun. over and over and over. pastel pink with a pretty bow on the hot glued on the end for decoration (the two of you might have done that together). but don't worry about how you know where her vibrator is, that's none of your business! 
while you're washing off the facial cleanser from your face in the shower as conditioner sits patiently in your hair, you think about nico. specifically whether or not you're actually interested in him. sure, he's a nice guy, romantic. bad taste in movies but clearly cares about what you like since he picked out a horror film to take you on a date to. and yet, that nagging thing in the back of your head, the one that told you not to commit to a relationship for fear of being stuck in one, had you snap back to the reality of relationships. you'll never be free to just date who you want, whenever you want. it made you frown. 
you get out of the shower eventually, still undecided about the future of your dating life, and you decide to put the topic to rest and relax with a classic: nightmare on elm street. or maybe something else? suspiria,  the thing, or evil dead? you browse your collection, and stop at freddy vs. jason. speaking of shitty horror movies and sticking to the freddy theme, you think with a smirk. 
you slip the cd into the player. super retro, i know right? 
you're popcorn'd out, to say the least, so you skip on making a bowl. your movie is interrupted shortly by the buzzing of your phone. the caller id just lists a phone number in your area. usually, you wouldn't pick these up, but you do it anyways. stupidly. 
"hello?" you call out into your phone. 
"hello." comes a man's deep voice.
you scratch your head, careful not to chip your manicure. "who is this?"
"who is this?" he mimics you, emphasis on this.
you scoff, already annoyed. probably a prank call. "i asked you first."
"look," he mediates, probably sensing your forming annoyance, "all i have is a question to ask."
"alright..." you say. nothing wrong with that. "shoot."
"what's your favorite scary movie?"
you pretend to contemplate. "hereditary," you say finally. of course it's your favorite. it's had your heart since you first saw it in theaters. anyone who knows you knows not to bring it up if they don't want to hear you go on a tangent about it. "it's the right amount of atmosphere with the right amount of gore." 
"isn't that the one where the little girl gets decapitated after slamming into a telephone from sticking her head out of a car window?" the man on the phone drawls, testing you.
"yes!" you practically exclaim. you hope you found another fan. not many other people shared your enthusiasm for the movie as you did.
he hums. "that's an interesting choice. i don't hear it enough. a little depressing, though."
"you mean you call other girls asking them what their favorite horror movie is? that's a new level of game i've never seen before," you tease, abandoning the movie to get up mindlessly and head to the bathroom to put your hair up.
"not just any girl," he says with a chuckle.
"oh?" you say, "so i'm special?"
"you could say that."
you smile, staring back at your reflection. you get it now. "you know, you could've just come inside earlier, nico. no need to put on the act."
"i'm not nico," he corrects you sternly. 
you scoff and roll your eyes, putting your device down and switching it to speaker phone so you can multitask. "right," you say, unconvinced.
you sort through your collection of hair clips, picking out the right one — "the one with the strawberry charm, huh? that one's my favorite. 's sweet like you."
you nearly drop the accessory. how the fuck? a shiver shoots up through your spine. your head snaps towards the direction of the bathroom window. searching desperately for an answer, anyone that could've just been watching. but no one's there, of course!
"that's not funny, nico," you snap. you're pretty sure you've worn this hair clip to a study date over at his apartment, right? and he might've even complimented you on it. yeah, you try to convince yourself, he's seen it before.
but that doesn't explain how he knew —
"i told you already," the man on the phone's voice is agitated, "i'm not nico."
"then who the fuck are you?!" you ask in a shrill voice, ready to hang up on this motherfucker. you steadily twist your hair upwards and secure the claw around it, letting your remaining hair fall in a ponytail.
"i'll prove it to you," he tells you as if it's the simplest thing in the world. "check the backyard."
you shockingly decide not to hang up for your sake. you would rather keep a close eye on the situation rather than just let something happen to you. you creep towards the sliding glass doors, gulp, then switch on the light, only to be met with monstrosity. 
nico's on his knees; you can hear him whimpering from inside, scrambling for his amputated arm that lies in between him and the sliding door. you open your mouth but you can't scream; the only thing you can feel is a shudder that shakes you to your very core. you feel almost weak in the knees, desperate to keep yourself standing on your two feet. there's blood, so much blood. all the backyard porch, your roommates will be so mad and concerned about what happened? how can you even begin to explain this? 
you try to do the only sane thing you can think of: hang up and call the police. the thought of this being one big prank pulled on you crossed your mind, but you were too scared not to act. a beat passes after you pressed that little red button on your phone, and the door bursts open. this time you scream. 
in a dark blur, you're pressed roughly against a mirror that frames the wall behind the dining table. a gloved hand wraps around your throat. "you stupid bitch, hanging up on me."
you meet the mask of your captor: the damn mask from that slasher movie stab. you were never particularly fond of the franchise. "lame movie reference," you manage to choke out, and you instantly eat your words. he slaps you across the face and loosens his grip at the same time, watching you fall to your side on the hard ground. 
you can barely gather your thoughts — your head is fucking swimming — before he's dragging you by your ankle with a strong grip in the direction of your bedroom. you hate how you slide so easily across the smooth floor. you try your best to break free, to run, wriggling your leg violently to shake him away to no avail. when he's dragged you successfully inside the bedroom he closes it behind you, bends down and manhandles onto lacey's bed. 
tears spill down your cheeks. this is it. you're going to die. but he doesn't take out a knife, or any weapon, actually, to fatally harm you with. instead, he's rummaging through the drawers in front of the bed. and then it dawns on you and you sit up. that's the drawer where lacey's —
"ah, found it," the man says triumphantly, turning back towards you, pastel pink vibrator in hand, toying with the ribbon. "what a cute little thing. do you know how many times i've watched you get off to this little device? what a fucking sight you make."
your eyes narrow. "who are you?"
he chuckles, then uses a hand to remove his mask, revealing the face of your robotics professor. him? how is it possible you've managed to capture his attention? when throughout the entire course he's done nothing but ignore you, treating you like you didn't exist. always ignoring your questions. shit, he's the reason why you started going to nico in the first place for help in his class: because nico was like his golden-star-student. 
"i don't get it," you say, lip trembling as tears well in your eyes. "why me? what did i do—"
"to captivate me?" he finishes your sentence, turning on the vibrator. you gulp like it's your impending doom. professor raglan kneels onto the bed and you wish you could back up but you only hit the headboard behind you. "well, for starters: you were always so eager for my attention. and it hurt me not to give it to you. couldn't blow my cover, sweetheart."
you still didn't understand, but you didn't have anymore time to contemplate or question him. he was spreading your legs, splitting open a space under your short, pink skirt for him to gain access to the area between your legs. you fumble with the sheets, holding them in a death grip. you definitely ruined your manicure. once your skirt bunches up around your hips, it reveals your panty-less mound. of course. you didn't think to wear anything after your shower because it wasn't like you were going out. 
your professor whistles lowly, pupils dilating in desire. it's perverted, the way he puts down the vibe, and grabs your hips upwards so he can get a closer look at your pussy. you throb subconsciously, making him look back up at you with a quirked brow. he leans forward to blow air on you, eyes still steady to gage your reaction. you whimper and wriggle in his grasp, face heating up in embarrassment. "you just have the cutest little cunt," he comments when he pulls away, then sticks his tongue out to lick a stripe up your pussy. "mmm, even sweeter, too. sweeter than the little strawberry in your hair."
"ohh," you coo. you hate to admit how good it feels, but here you were, arching your back in his touch and moaning.
"yeah?" he asks, taking his mouth off of you for a moment. "my baby like it when i eat her dripping pussy?"
you sniffle, not answering. you can't find it within you to be able to. "no? maybe i'll stop and move on then." you want to cry, fuck. a feeling of relief settles back in when he takes the vibrator back in his hand. the low hum grabs your attention — not like you could zone out at a time like this anyways.
when the device meets your needly clit you groan, flex your fingers at the sheets. "oh, fuck," you whisper. his eyes never leave your face, and every time you regrettably look at him, he's breathing heavily, open mouthed, like he just can't get enough of you. so you avoid looking at him, going through stages of keeping your eyes closed or looking up at the ceiling, praying for sweet release to whatever cruel deity is looking upon you getting fucked by this old man.
the vibrations against your clit are a little too good to be true. you can't help but feel like there's a price, one you'll specifically have to pay with his dick inside you. you wonder if it'll be lame like the other guys you've had, but honestly? you could get off to the thought of this situation, and you'll definitely remember this for future masterbation-sake. you're a freak like that.
raglan presses down on your stomach, iliciting a hiss from you through your teeth. "want you to come all over my arms," he tells you, "coat my gloves, you'll make me so happy."
fuck, then you get an idea. the gloves inside of you. you throb once more at the thought. "i-inside," you murmur, hoping he'd get the message.
"huh? what's that, baby?" he asks mockingly, but you know damn well he heard you. please don't make me said it, you think.
you reach down to touch his free hand, guiding it towards your entrance. "want my fingers inside you, hmm? baby needs something inside her to feel satisfied?"
"mhm," you hum with a nod of your head. he slowly slips a gloved finger inside you, the fabric deliciously creating friction that makes you grind on his hand. he looks up at you with a dirty smile, then reaches forward to kiss you as he pumps his fingers in and out of you ever so slowly. it's perfect. the stimulation of the vibrator combined with the feeling of his clothed hand is enough to make you burst.
and you do gracefully. so much that he pecks your cheek, tells you how much of a good girl you are for him, as lewd 'ah's tumble from your lips uncontrollably. you buck against his hand until he pulls is out of you, whining at his removal.
"i know, sweetheart, i know," he sympathizes after you, "daddy's cock's gonna be inside you soon, though. then you'll have something else to play with."
you're already exhausted from your first orgasm, somewhat unsure of how you're going to take the next, but you can hardly think about that now. you're drunk off the atmosphere between you two, nico's amputation is far forgotten. you can't even remember what you were doing before this. your hair is tussled in a way that has your hair clip drooping down the side of your shoulder loosely, but you don't have any energy to fix it. all you can think about is daddy's — wait, when did he become daddy? — cock inside you, and that's all that matters.
raglan begins to grind his bare cock against your entrance, having discarded his black slacks moments ago. he rubs the tip against you, purposefully bumping against your click, drawing out a symphony of noises — babbles along the lines of "please, just put it in, i can't take it anymore" — as your face contorts in a sob and tears fall down your cheeks again.
"my girl is such a crybaby," he chuckles, then slowly guides your hips to slide down on his cock. he fills you up by the inch, making you feel every ridge and vein. the stinging sensation of not being adjusted to his length washes over you in a surprisingly pleasurable wave. "so fucking tight," he gasps. he lets out his respective groans once he's fully sheathed inside of you.
then he starts moving; then things start to get good. you're not fully adjusted to his length, but the way you're leaking around him makes for perfect lube. what's a little pleasure without pain? it could be worse, you could be on the floor writhing in pain with multiple stab wounds, but instead you were being stabbed by his dick inside of you, so you weren't in a position to complain.
raglan leans down so his body is on top of yours, keeps himself steady by planting one hand to the side of your head as he aggressively snaps his hips into yours. you realize, in this moment, just how desperate he's probably been for this. not like you could do much thinking, but the way he was pistoning inside you said enough about how he felt. and god you felt good, clenching and unclenching around him, making the prettiest noises he's ever heard.
one particularly hard thrust has your head swimming, like it did when he slapped you. you want him to slap you again, so you initiate it in the only way you know how; reaching forward to land a weak hit across his face. he stops moving for a second, shocked. then with a swift whack across the face, he's back to thrusting inside of you, even harder this time around. "wanted me to hit you so bad, you could've just asked you dumb little slut," he growls into your ear.
"''m sorry," you have the audacity to giggle, "couldn't tell you."
"yeah? am i fucking you that stupid?" he asks, "'course, i don't expect you to able to answer that."
he flips you over suddenly so you land on your stomach, putting himself back in, fucking you with reckless abandon. the way his cock is hitting your g-spot right now has you plummeting over the edge. you wriggle your hips backwards to help him get off too, which he does right inside of you, filling you up to the brim.
he doesn't pull out. he's waited too damn long for this to do so. he's gonna enjoy a nice, long time inside of you, whether you like it or not. he collapses on his side, pulling you close to him so that he's spooning you. the most important thing to him in that moment, is your half-awake form rising and falling with each breath against him with his cock buried deep inside of you, strawberry charmed hair clip discarded somewhere by the pillows.
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the-moon-files · 1 year ago
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Linked Universe / GN!Reader - Random Headcanons abt the Chain :)
Part 1 (ur here!) / Part 2 / Part 3
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Sun: Gender Neutral! Reader (you/they/them), Guide Reader
Orbit: Headcanons-ish
Stars: First, Sky, Four, Legend
Comets & Meteors: Content: None Known & Triggers: None Known.
U have a lot of Nicknames: Guide, Hero's Guide, Prince, Princey, Star, (more to be added?).
First (Manga!Link):
Has "too good" of posture lol
It makes his back stiff and by the time he's in his bedroll he's confused about why it feels better, silly silly man
Just in general tenses his muscles too often, so whenever u offer to massage him, he nearly crumbles on the spot
(the others know exactly how amazing ur massages are, and are fully staring at him in jealousy lol)
Gets little rips and tears in his clothing all the time somehow??
Even tho he wont have a scratch acc on him after hours of battle???
mans could be flying around Skyloft with only clouds touching him and come back pouting telling you he ripped his scarf again :'(
Likes to be slightly in front of you most of the time, especially in new places/other Links' Hyrules
It just makes him feel better knowing he's both protecting you, and that you're watching his back
(Most Links feel at their best/most confident when your voice can be heard just over their shoulder, not that they don't love seeing ur face now too)
Sky (Skyward Sword Link):
Is slowly making everyone he knows a collection of wooden figurines
He usually carves when he's bored or stressed
so needless to say this mission of the Shadow (slow going, stressful at times like Twi getting hurt)
Has made him give u an army of little wooden figures (everyone else gets a small collection bc ur the first he gives one to)
Did i say give? Excuse me, i meant:
sneaks them as a little surprise into your belongings or clothing or other personal effects
This started bc after a week or two of him giving you wooden things you tried to reroute him to other ppl,
so Sky just made it his mission to see how many he can sneak instead onto you on any given day lmao
(Also he may or may not have daydreamed abt being able to carve u things and actually physically give them to you on his adventure before, so he's taking advantage of being able to now)
Has luscious hair at all times, little to no effort, Wars is so pissed abt it lol
Mf responded when asked what products he used (by poor Wars too) with, "wym?? With water??? And soap????"
Never ties his boot laces
You will all be gearing up for battle and go to stalk and stealth kill monsters and right before u get up on them u always have to look over at Sky's shoes and whisper at him to tie them
Is the most likely to plant face first into the ground or trip and fall on his ass from shoes untying
He just didnt need to with being in the clouds on his Loftwing all the time back on Skyloft and so he never rlly adapted to that even on the surface lol
He's also just miserable at doing a decent knot so you've taken to teaching him repeatedly how to tie them-
why didnt the knight academy help with this at all actually??
(Wind makes fun of him be hes a sailor and knows like 10+ knots)
Four (Four Swords/Minish Cap Link):
Loses his tools constantly
Well not really "lose" so much as "slightly misplace"
It drives him crazy, the Minish used to help him with it back in his Hyrule so he got out of the habit of putting things back where they belong
You've gotten to the point where you'll glance over wherever he's working so the next time he comes up to u complaining abt a lost hammer or smth u immediately just "should be over by the fire"
And ur right, 99.9% of the time its so funny
Bc Four's all like "wtf ive moved around so much since then i took all the other tools with me- MF. U WERE RIGHT."
Is rlly good at like color matching, comes in handy for new outfits
Also has aches and pains like in his hands and arms mostly
Bc of all the forge work, and absolutely treasures any massages u offer him
Likes to wear matching jewelry with you! Like earrings or piercings or necklaces etc
Also has good taste in jewelry and what looks good on everyone + you
Legend (Link to the Past, Link's Awakening etc):
Unfortunately the type of person to just shove things in his bag willy nilly
Its the horder tendencies, he just has a lot of stuffs so he gave up trying to organize it
Actually really good at styling hair, Legend would absolutely lie abt it if u asked but he can spend as much time on his hair as Warrior
Likes to experiment with new clothes, like skirts or bright colors, esp if they match some of his clothes already
U ran by some makeup one time in another Hyrule and he knew how to use it rlly well??
Lies abt random skills he has, or like thinks skills he already has can translate well,
like he's rode a horse before wym he can't drive Wild's motorcycle??
Or fly a Loftwing???
Well now its a challenge
Tbh most competitive over stupid things randomly out of all the Links besides Wild, Wind, Wars, and occasionally Hyrule + Sky + Time
Got challenged to try and go shield surfing with u once and thought that horse-riding skill would transfer and it did in fact Not.
Actually kinda scared the other Links watching u two spin out and crash ngl, what with doing an accidental backflip? Midair??
but u both were okay somehow???
Also weirdly lucky, u stg he's got some sort of ring or blessing for that
IT ACCIDENTALLY POSTED I FUCKING HATE TUMBLR ITS DONE THIS TO ME MULTIPLE TIMES NOW 😭😭
All the Links WOULD HAVE been here if it werent for fucking tumblr
Ill post more parts soon if anyone is interested
Peace out,
🌙
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hellofears · 8 months ago
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wasn't me no one in this home of mine voted for anything of the sort and most likely anyone I know didn't either. I forget how many ppl live in the uk sometimes peace and love to the william wanters well and truly
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#HONESTLY. not suprised though british mothers in their late 30s-40s i see you grandmas i see u the gay men peeping ur head out the corner#i see the princess fantasy it is not without its flowers i see it all and i meet u with acceptance#hes not ugly tho i'm the type where i don't think anyone really is or i haven't had that sort of reaction to anyone so idk though#also tbh idk how many ppl are actually taking those tests.. unless harry styles was on there because the fans the stans will get their favs#the acalades the little titles if they can with speed could be best juggler best dog shit picker upper best at climbing shit they love it#they love it all. their twitter handles at the top that shit gets cropped in obis paint on their iphone and put on twt like a proud parent#(i get it in that sense though its steering off the william topic matter)#with their kids art. was 1ce real in2 kpop and i got out to my benefit lot of shit long story i'm glad i'm in a better place now#since i got into in in probs objectively my darkest or some of my darkest not that u cant like kpop or talk about it or be in that scape#in a way thats positive or like healthy with me it was just not healthy unfortunately. my relationship is better with it now and i still#interact with content personally and more casually. i-#still have alot of love and appreciation for what ppl meant to me even if its different now i still have so much love for shit. just not so#deeply in the environment yk that round and round#standom as previous.. no doubt at the time i was thirsty for distraction i cudnt handle myself or my life basically my#life feeling like a fuckn tornado that was pissing on me so i probably no matter what were going to find vices but i have no doubt about th#talents and passion and artistry over there. all the racism and colourism n shit that just felt constant had a part#my conduction#what i surrounded me with my landscape because its a lot of inter like personal connections and heavy online bonding n just mess where its#like my fckn life force just i was screaming from the inwards outwards and still deaf to it. for me it was a host it turns out 2 be for man#cant track my gradual change really other than a year or maybe between 2 years we grow still thbink about stuff i hate myself for doing#the change happened gradually and naturally i feel though it all had dramatics its hard to track#there was shit before that when i was even younger and oh hellscape i fear it was bumpy i'm not gonna say it got better with age or smth#cause i dont believe thats true atleast not entirely i hate all of it i some of the connections i made are so key in my growth and i have s#nice wonderful like irrefutable memories i hope ppl r doing well so bad so bad some i even want to talk to again but i know for me i cant#give in 2 that pull and the day if i reconnect i will and hopefully there'll be wonderful ppl to reconnect with in that case to meet me#its all ever changing if i think differently in the future i do i just hope that will be me coming to understand myself and development#being hyper critical of myself tho i talk about me like i jumped through hoops to do detestable shit so its a balancing game and im wonky#its the fans the stans or its the royal family entourage they are vivid in my head or the ppl who came across it and decided to just add-#their 2 sence or saw it and were like hehe this is so unserious im going to be mischevious or take the piss lol#all of which get their acknowledgement its all fun and games truly those who take it serious will and shall however
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spence-whore · 8 months ago
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Short Stack
Spencer Agnew x Reader
Request: spencer is so cute he’s just a wittle guy 😭😭😭 he would tower over me tho omg wait a reader x spencer but reader works at smosh and is short and ppl make fun of her and spencer is like “nah its hot that they are short” or something cute and flirty and kinda goofy because he’s so goofy
A/N lisssteeeen i know i just posted one but i hated it and i felt like this was such a cute one. so, y’all get two in one day🫶🏻 this one is gonna be a short one (no pun intended) but hopefully this does your request justice<3 also, side comment about this. This was definitely a different one for me to write because I’m usually taller than everyone i meet. I always like to say I’m metaphorically small because my personality and how quiet i am makes me feel tiny lmao
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Your entire life, you have been known as the small one. You’re quite small, so this led to you being teased for it your entire life. You thought once you got into an adult, office job that it would change.
Oh, how you were so wrong.
“Hey short stack.” Courtney said and flopped down in the chair across from you.
“You got nothing better? I’ve heard that a thousand of times before.” You said snorting and shaking your head.
You know that they meant no harm but it got to a point that it was kind of annoying. All anyone ever comments on about you is your height.
“Honestly though, I know we comment on it a lot, Y/N…” Noah says trailing off and standing in front of the chairs.
“How are you so little?” You respond in a mocking tone. “I don’t know. Whenever I was little, doctors done scans and everything. It was nothing concerning or anything like that. I’m just small.”
“I honestly think it’s adorable. You’re like a little pocket size human.” You hear Amanda say from the side as she approaches the conversation.
“At least I’m not getting bullied for being a ‘short king’ anymore.” Shayne comments while doing air quotations and sitting down beside Courtney. “I genuinely never thought there would be a day that someone would show up at Smosh that is smaller than me and Spencer.”
“I might be small but I can still fuck up your knee caps if you don’t leave me alone.” You mumbled while sliding down in your seat and glaring at Shayne.
“Leave them alone guys.” You hear Spencer say whenever approaching the little get together. “Honestly, I think it’s kinda hot that they are that little.” He says and shrugs his shoulders.
You felt your face immediately flush red because your office crush had just commented on your height and said it was hot.
“Uh, thanks? I guess? That’s definitely a new one.” You whispered and tried to cover up your face with your hair.
“Honestly though, it really is. I’m used to everyone else being my height or taller but you’re so little. It’s so precious. I could like scoop you up and just carry you around.” Spencer adds then walks away.
You didn’t know what to say, you could just feel everyone staring at you because everyone was very aware of your very obvious crush on the guy.
“Oh, Y/N!! Your height is so attractive!! I could just pick you up smooch you and hold you close to me!” Amanda starts saying in a teasing tone with a huge grin on her face.
“So, how’s that new video idea going?” You try changing the topic with Courtney but she won’t change it.
“Oh, what video? I think we should just talk about the little exchange you and little Spencer just had.” She says while gigging and making a face at you.
“He was just teasing me, he doesn’t find me attractive or anything. Just leave it be, please.” You pleaded, staring at the woman in front of you.
“Y/N. I was pretty much saying what Amanda was saying..” You hear Spencer say from behind you, not realizing he had came back. “I could just pick you up, smooch you, and carry you around.” He says in a mocking tone like Amanda then starts laughing as well as everyone else.
All you could feel was your face heating up and your heart racing. “Oh for fucks sake.”
“Calm down short stack, might blow a fuse with how red you are.” Spencer says while sitting beside you and wrapping his arm around your shoulder then pulling you close to him.
“We’re just teasing you. Calm down. What I said might be true though. You will never know.”
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phagodyke · 2 years ago
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nvm im too tired and overstimulated for this shit
#.vent#i only slept a couple hours last night man. i cant do short notice evening socials on an empty tank let alone resist unexpected rsd#if they had let me know earlier then i wouldve taken a nap and worked out beforehand to get my energy back up#idk just. if u rly want my company then maybe u should actually invite me next time. its not like they didnt plan it#even if they just forgot its not particularly pleasant to be the one person insignificant enough to forget abt. theres only 5 of us#they rly remembered to ask the one guy who isnt even here before me yknow. ugh u see the stupid thoughts i have to battle!!#like on a rational level ik it was probably genuinely accidental. but the way i instinctively react is not always rational#so regardless someone has to deal with the emotional fallout and thats me. regulating this shit is hard work even when im NOT tired asf#i really really dont want to be an asshole and spoil anyones fun bc its no-ones fault + as real as it feels to me rn ik im overreacting#but i cant voluntarily expose myself to personal triggers when im already exhausted + more vulnerable than usual#so just gotta shut myself in my room and deal with it in my own super healthy ways as per usual. may they never fucking find out#trying my best not to be an asshole i hope to fucking god they dont think im being an asshole i just told them i was tired + i meant it#this wouldnt be so much of a problem if it hadnt happened to me before. and also ik its bc one rsd trigger makes me more sensitive-#to picking up unrelated cues but there ARE other things they do that i find ostracising which rly dont fucking help. but-#theyre not things i can actually confront them abt so usually i just gotta deal w it which is fine but it lowers my general tolerance#its ok. its ok i like them all a lot theyre lovely ppl and it doesnt matter if there is a some grain of truth in the things im thinking#bc the risk of me believing + acting on a bad faith irrational thought leads to outcomes that are far worse than those from#misidentifying someones malicious behaviour towards me as neutral by accident/in good faith. okay im done now i think#just ignore me spewing out the old brain gunk on main again eurgh anyway im gonna go calm myself and read and SLEEP#ill be normal by tomorrow morning farewell comrades#honestly i dont mind dealing w shit this way bc its the best option for everyone but man. sometimes its so fucking lonely#like there are sides of me ppl will never engage with and for good reason but without them being acknowledged i find it rly hard to feel-#any real emotional intimacy or closeness with another person. but what other option is there#i sure as hell dont miss the fights i used to constantly get into when i wasnt able to regulate myself i lost so many friends that way#it is what it is. on we go for now
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iconsumeheadcanons · 29 days ago
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some turtle origin hcs
this is based on appearance for now. and very small list lol. i just needed to talk about tmnt and herps or i was gonna like explode or smth. PLEASE share ur own ideas if u have any!!!!
i think tumblr will auto-label images posted by another user that reused in-site, but if not i just grab baby tmnt turt pics from forgetful-nerd
2003
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either yellow-bellied sliders Trachemys scripta scripta (left) or chinese box turtle Cuora flavomarginata(right)(im leaning more towards cuora here)
->yellow plastrons
->domed shells (espceially like the chinese box for this!)
->both sold as pets (yellow-bellied way more likely since its native-ish and common)
->i heard sliders are very personable (most sliders slip into water if i get within 100ft of them tho so i cannot confirm)
->the box turts are very squort
2012
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diamondback terrapins malaclemys terrapin!! you cannot convince me otherwise tbh (but i love to hear more hcs too!!)
->look at the goofy shape of those legs. look at that. just like the 3d models
->spots, swirls, pale coloring(but there are ones that match the color of the brothers better, they arent all pale white)
->flat ovular shape shell that is bulky
->popular pets, typically ppl get more than one at a time, and somewhat native to the region as they live in brackish/coastal habitats (fitting for turts who regularly swim in flooded areas and eat algae and worm based meals for like....15ish years)
->(they would be carnivorous if they were purely turtle btw)(also eating algae isnt really too weird. prolly strange how they do it since they seem to eat it fresh? but ppl eat seaweed and algae based broths all the time; i.e. most stuff in japan actually!)
->pls look at pics of these, theyre so unique as a species, have fun personalities, and look so stinking silly
->oh and dee said one ep that they were either (eastern?) box turtles or diamondbacks. i think they have very little in common w terrapene carolina carolina
2023
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STINKPOTS aka musk turtles!!!!!!!! i havent picked out a particular one (and there are many!) but LOOK AT IT ASDLFKJASDFKLJDSF
->ALL of them look exactly this goofy. they only get GOOFIER with age. spectacular
->so small. please understand. size of a pea kinda creature (only exaggerating a bit). they hatch the size of a coin and reach adult size of smaller than a human hand. i have held one before. this is not exaggerating. i have "medically small" hands as well. (if anyone could explain what my neuromusc doc meant by that btw that would be cool to know. i just know it means i cant reach the enter key on my laptop w/o moving my whole arm over too)
->stinky:teenage boys going to public school blah blah that joke i guess
->looks exactly like how i imagine donnies scream would look like if it manifested as a real turtle
->some ppl have them as pets, kinda rare tho. the turts are VERY common in my experience. usually in wetlands foresty environments. if there are some native to illinois i dont see why they wouldnt be fucking around some parking lot drainage pond in new york
->great mixture of looking fat and squishy and also looking like a child growing into their long limbs. good silly shapes
->look like little treats to snack on like gum <3
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^mikey giving his first stand up performance at comedy club
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ceofcatgirls · 1 month ago
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Ok so here's a text post explaining why I think it's kinda obvious that Messmer is directly Radagon's son :PPP since I either don't see many ppl talk abt it or see ppl outright deny it so let me try get my interpretation out there into the world. You don't have to agree with it I just want to put my thoughts into a cohesive post.
Just a heads up. This post will end up having me sound like I'm insane.
But tbh most ER theories will have you like that and we're here to have fun are we not. So what if I sound a lil insane at times. I think that's normal (I will try to be as consise as I can I promise)
I will now start with the weakest evidence.
Theme song.
As you may know, since its been pointed out a lot, Messmer's theme is reminiscent of Radagon's.
I believe this does point to a connection to them. After all, this is a method uses by FromSoft with other characters. For example, Romina's theme song is reminiscent of Malenia's, with it sounding slightly altered to show Romina likes the rot whilst Malenia does not. They're connected through the rot god.
Same with PCR's theme and Starscourge Radahn. SR's theme sounds more tired and weak due to Radahn rotting, whilst PCR's sounds more triumphant and heroic. After all, it's meant to be Radahn at his prime, not at his lowest like with SR.
So naturally, Messmer's theme being reminiscent of Radagon's is an indication of something. But that something, so far is vague.
Maybe it's because they're both attached to an idealised version of Marika. Maybe it's because they both uphold an order of hers, Radagon with the GO and Messmer with his crusade and subsequent occupation. Ideals Marika no longer follows, but people close to her do.
As I said, this is possibly the weakest evidence. But it's the starting point that there is some sort of connection. That connection judt being Marika, for now.
Now, the second weakest evidence (imo)
Messmer's looks.
Perhaps one of the most glaring things about Messmer is his red hair. Radagon's children, with the exception of Miquella, all have red hair. So when you see a demi god with red hair, it's fair to assume you'll think they're Radagon's child. Hell, this goes for more than demi gods. This goes for the fire giants and potentially even leone misbegotten warriors.
But,,,, well, there's a reason why this is the second weakest evidence.
Because, there is a possibility that one of Radagon's children, besides Miquella, also didn't have red hair. Rykard's hair colour is surprisingly a topic of debate. There's evidence for him having red hair, but also for him being blond.
If Rykard is truly blond, this would mean that Marika's genes carry through Radagon even if he doesn't have children with her (well-- they are the same person after all). Who's to say it isn't the same case for Messmer? Who's to say Messmer has red hair because Radagon's genes carry through Marika, as they are the same person after all.
Maybe Messmer has the same condition as Radagon, where Radagon's red hair is potentially a curse of the fire giants, perhaps Messmer's is a by-product of his fire.
Again, this evidence is weak for a reason. But like the precious one, it hints at a connection.
Third (and last) weakest evidence: (weaker) themes
Messmer is a character of many themes. But one of his parallels is one he has with Malenia.
They both try to uphold and fight for an order of someone they care for. That someone also being a god (well, miquella was an empyrean but he does eventually become a god). A god with golden hair, and a god who weaves gold in their order (gold for Marika and unalloyed gold for miquella). Messmer and Malenia both have red hair, both are blind, and both are cursed from birth. We know Malenia's curse comes from an outer god, but Messmer's seems to he more mysterious. Still, nonetheless both are cursed from birth.
Messmer being a son of Radagon would further emphasis these themes. Him having a child that wants to uphold Marika's will, but then having another willing to do anything to do anything to replace it (going as far as to break her needle and bloom), would fit nicely thematically.
Still, it's not the strongest of evidence. It's nice, nonetheless.
Now, onto what imo are the stronger sets of evidence.
Starting out with the 'weakest' of the strongest: Gaius' remembrance.
Let's look at what the description of his remembrance says.
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This is probably one of my most crackpot theories too. But whatever I like so kkkkkk let's move on.
The usage of the word 'elder brother' is what I want to draw attention to. Personally when I first read this remembrance, this was my legit reaction:
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BROO maybe this is me being insane and delusional but I don't understand why this isn't talked about further by anyone!!!! The game says both were elder brothers to Radahn.
Now. Yes this could just be the game saying Messmer and Radahn were bros and since Messmer was older he was considered an older brother to Radahn like how Gaius was.
But. FromSoft very much pays attention to details. Including the words they use. Messmer is very obviously Marika's son, is it far-fetched to say they weren't aware of what they were doing when writing that description??
This is the same game company that enjoys seeing all the fan interpretations even if they clash with one another.. they defo wrote this knowing some would read it as Messmer being a metaphorical older brother whilst others will read it as him being his literal older brother.
Mind you, this isn't the first time they've done this. They do it in another instance of the DLC! And it's one I don't see many talk about either. Miquella calling St Trina his love can be both read as her being a manifestation of his love, or her being a part of himself that he loves. Trina being called his fate, rather than love, in the trailer means the waters are further muddied on what Miquella means by "his love".
But anyways, I'm just saying FromSoft is very deliberate with their words and what they choose.
It'd be a nice way to contrast Gaius' and Messmer's characters; one Albinauric, another a Demi god. One in one of the most mistreated races, and another born of divinity. They are opposite in man ways, but they looked past it and found common ground where a friendship could flourish.
It's also just generally a nice double play on the word brother. Very cheeky. Hidding two stories in plain sight with one word is exactly up FromSoft's alley, and they write it very well too.
This evidence, coupled with other evidence, leads me to believe that what FromSoft means is that Gaius is a metaphorical older brother whilst Messmer is a literal older brother (even if he himself does not know this and only sees himself as an older brother in a metaphorical way).
The next theory is another one that relies on themes. But well. Elden Ring is no stranger to those.
Let me just point out, every marriage Marika is involved in results in three children.
Marika/Godfrey; Godwyn, Morgott and Mohg.
Radagon/Rennala; Radahn, Rykard, Ranni.
And yet, with Marika and Radagon, it's just Malenia and Miquella. But then who could be the third child? Would FromSoft really not continue this very clear pattern?
Messmer fills the spot of third (but actually first since hes oldest?) quite nicely.
He'd help create a parallel between Marika's marriage with Godfrey and her marriage with Radagon. In both marriages, she has twins cursed by outer gods. But Messmer was born cursed whilst Godwyn was not because Messmer was born of the same god. Even in name, Godwyn takes after Godfrey, who unlike Marika does not have to carry the burden of his sins. But Messmer couldn't escape from that in the same way.
But, couldn't Melina potentially actually be the third child?
Well, not really, because Melina's themes wouldn't fit that. If she were to be the secret third child, she'd be following convention. But part of Melina's character is that she breaks convention-- particularly she helps you break convention. And that theme is best portrayed by having her actually be the fourth child of theirs.
As I discussed before, thematically Messmer and Malenia fit together because they both wish to uphold an order. In this case, they'd take after Radagon (who is also potentially cursed who couldve guessed...). Miquella and Melina take after Marika, as she is a god, like Miquella, and they both additionally have other halves. Marika also wants a new order, like Melina. Melina is fine with sacrificing herself to being about a new age, just like Marika, and knows she needs to die, not only for the Erdtree to burn, but also because all of Marika's influence must end. She, unlike Miquella, is successful because she learns from Marika's mistakes, because Miquella doesn't realise he'd be like his mother.
It also fits the running theme of Miquella being paired up with Malenia and Messmer being paired up with Melina (one closed eye, both having a vision of fire, which is dangerous to the erdtree) (and by paired up I mean storytelling wise ok 😭)
This briefly became abt melina.. whoops. I like her a lot in case you can't tell. Haha I could say more abt her but lets stop here. The main take away is; Messmer would be the third child of her union with Radagon (obviously cuz she would have to have him before she married Radagon), with the Empyrean twins and Omen twins fitting the role of twins cursed by outer gods, and Melina being special so she gets to be a 4th child uwu
Now. For the strongest theory imo. The butterfly theory.
Perhaps it's already been said, but it's simply not talked abt enough.
The butterfly theory, at least to me, is basically saying each child Marika has with Radagon is represented with a butterfly.
Messmer's only showed up in the DLC bc he's DLC exclusive ofc. But also because he was hidden away in the LoS.
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We know the nascent and aoenian buttlerfly 100% correspond to Miquella and Malenia.
As for Melina and Messmer; the smoldering butterfly is said to kindle fires; Melina is the kindling maiden, and she self immolates to burn the erdtree. Even the "vision of fire" line in Messmer's kindling most likely refers to her. Again, wording is very important to FromSoft.
The black pyrefly butterfly is obviously Messmer's, as its said to follow lands scorched by Messmer's flames. They also resemble his fire in colour. And again, they are DLC exclusive and only appear in the LoS.
The reason why these 4 get butterflies and the other demigods don't, is because these 4 are specifically the children of Marika and Radagon. What else could connect them? What else sets them apart from other demigods?
Timeline issues.
I will briefly address these.
As I said, I believe Messmer and Melina are paired up. The Empyrean twins are twins, so timeline wise they showed up together. Imo, it seems Melina is the youngest, and obviously Messmer is the eldest. The start, and the beginning. Again it fits their stories and characters. They even have the same eye closed! With one due to Marika and the other potentially being due to GEQ... oh my.
I believe, personally, Marika has Messmer after ascending and marrying Godfrey, making Messmer a child made outside of marriage. And guess what I'm abt to say..... yes that also fits his theme kkkkkk since he's separated from the other demi gods-- who were not born outside of marriage-- and also goes with Messmer being cast away in the LoS, hidden and separated from everyone.
How do I know Marika has Messmer after marrying Godfrey? Well, its complicated, but this video explains nicely;
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I dont agree with some points in the video. However, it's still an excellent video I recommend you watch. It has some excellent points and wonderful analysis. I like it a lot!!!!
The main point I want to point out, that the video shows nicely, is that Marika's marriages are shown through the ribbons on her arms. By her hair and crown, we can tell she's already a god. And by her having one armband, we can tell she's married one-- to Godfrey.
Personally, due to the description of the minor erdtree spell saying "the kindness of gold without order", I am led to believe Marika is gold and Radagon is order, akin to St Trina being Miquella's fate.
I will not get into Radagon's origins, tho I do believe he's always been marika. But if he is Order, then Marika is able to have a child with him after becoming a god and marrying Godfrey. Since it leaves a nice window of time between Godfrey winning against the fire giants and thus the era of the erdtree being established, and then Radagon showing up in the Liurnian wars. In my mind, I don't see why it's not possible.
Why would she have her first child with Radagon? Lol, who knows. Maybe since he is Order, she wanted her child to inherent that trait (as she hadn't grown to hate the Golden Order by now, its early in the timeline). Maybe she wanted her firstborn to be a child of one god. Maybe she wanted to retry and make Shamen again. Who knows, really.. tho personally I lean more to the first option I gave.. It'd make more sense, in terms of character development.
And now, does Messmer know of Radagon? Who knows! Perhaps he's including Radagon when speaking about his mother, knowing they're the same person so he addresses them as one. Or maybe he thinks Godfrey is his dad. Or maybe Marika told him he has no father. Or maybe he knows of Radagon, doesn't know he's Marika, and just doesn't care who is dad is. Honestly, this question can have many answers lol.
Hopefully this made sense. I am writing this quite late at night (-.-)Zzz・・・・ if I have anything else to add.. I prob will later. I'll go over grammar and spelling mistakes after I wake up. Forgive my eepy brain. Hopefully I remembered all my points. And hopefully this was cohesive.
If you have anything to add pls don't hesitate to do so :3<<<<
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enden-k · 5 months ago
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I'm so glad someone said it...
Like, Genshin is THE toxic ex of gachas. I feel so sorry for those who had it as their first Gacha/current one and only one because of how they are. Like, no Gacha games (that I play) are this bad with rewards, literally they give out A LOT of rewards just for their half anniversary. Hoyo's Genshin team is just money hungry and expect the fanbase to stay loyal and just now they're giving a free 5 star because it finally has competition and their player base is declining. I'm so glad I played for less than a month (the story and gameplay wasn't fun for me) because I was able to see other Gacha games I enjoyed like wuwa (literally what I wanted from Genshin) and Nikke (I went for the csm collab but their story and music is actually good), heck, even crk (though I stopped after 2 years) because they're what normal gachas are. Gachas aren't meant to give low rewards like genshin, they usually reward players for playing with a good amount, even surpass the normal amount because their dev team cares.
im not much of a gacha player/enjoyer (my first actual gachas i enjoyed were 7k before it ended and fgo and i mainly started bc i love fate universe) but from the few i tried out to the ones i actively play (fgo, hsr, etcetc) gnshn rlly is unrewarding, always has been
every year the subject of their anniversary and how unrewarding and sucky it is (useless gadgets you use maybe once and some pets) comes up, its lit nothing new. i dont know if some remember but when we had this topic 2 yrs ago (i think??) i lit suggested they could gift a free standard 5star for anni. now 4 yrs later, just when player base is shrinking, they offer a super belated selector of standard characters that 90% of the players already own since its BEEN 4+ YRS and are easily bested now by the *checks character archive*
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37 other 5stars that most players own some at least now (nari and dehya i can understand that some ppl are missing them since they were added much later) its like they hand them over only bc theyre of no use compared to the rest of the roster anymore
im not complaining abt a free 5star selector, i jsut think ppl are blinded so easily by gnshn dangling it in front of them to lure them back/keep them after being so unrewarding to their player base for years compared to other gachas. i also thjink its just silly bc they waited so long with that that its not of use for the entire player base anymore but only for new players or ppl still missing the unit they really love but never managed to get. it doesnt feel much of an anni reward, it feels like bait after all these years idk man
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