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perseephoneee · 3 months ago

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okie dokie does a Dean Winchester x reader fic work? Had an idea way back in s1 when jess first dies, (older sister, who kinda takes sam under her wing) reader ended up meeting dean through sam. They had similar personalities but (reader) was more of a hopeless romantic than Dean. Sam on the other hand could totally see them together but Dean always denied it.

“Stop eyeing her like she's a piece of steak, you creep” “The hell? I do not do that, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

so they left ca and travelled and maybe in s2-3 (doesnt have to be accurate) they end up back in ca because of a case or cause reader called sam for help. (not expecting dean to show up as well) and after shes not in danger, turns out they get along really well.

"Im not an arm rest, dean." "Mhm, then why are you so short?" "I'M 5'3 THATS NORMAL"

and just fluff..? idk man let me know if its not what you want to write, i can totally change it💜

not a steak (dean winchester x f!reader)

↳ masterlist ↳ ship exchange ↳ taglist ↳ 1k celebration

wow remember when i could actually write things in a timely manner? yeah, me neither. i miss those days (that never existed). whomp whomp.

You don't necessarily remember the exact moment that you met Sam. He's been a constant in your life since you were his TA as an undergraduate, watching this freakishly tall freshman so eager to succeed in your class. He made your heart soft, and he made you feel protective. Even though he was so much bigger than you, a naivety in his persona made you take extra time to ensure he succeeded. He ended up getting an A in the class.

You do remember when you met Dean, however. You had heard stories of Dean from Sam the few times you'd catch lunch outside of school. By this point, you were a grad student, filling the void of the older sibling that Sam unconsciously needed filled. You never pried for too many details, and that's how you got people to shut up really fast. But you did meet Dean right as he left town to look for his Dad. Dean was coarse and dismissive of you as if you were just another roadblock stopping him from taking his brother. When you finally got his attention, it was just to size you up before wordlessly climbing into his car. Sam seemed apologetic, but mostly, you were just worried. You had every right to be. Jessica died a week later.

The thing about you is that you can't let a dead dog lie. Where's the fun in that? You'd much rather figure out ways to raise them.

Sam was brilliant, but he let enough details slip to allow you to research him. And you were a law graduate student; you knew a thing or two about studying. Random newspaper clippings, shoutouts of various names, and blog posts allowed you to figure out the supernatural aspect of his life that he had kept from you. You should've been more surprised, but you were more excited than anything. There was more out there. What a strangely relieving thought.

This knowledge proved helpful when you realized you had a poltergeist.

The new place you moved into was charming and Victorian, the dream of everyone with a Pinterest board. It was in fairly decent shape, and with your roommates, you guys thought you could polish it up to something livable during your suffering years of graduate school. Unfortunately, the price was too good to be true, which led to the unfortunate circumstance of hauntings culminating in one of your roommates in the hospital, barely alive. You called Sam that night.

"Hey Sam, it's me…" you trailed off at that, feet tucked under you as the machines' beeping cut through the silence. "I need your help."

The next day, he was at your door, enveloping you in a hug. He smelled exactly the same, and you didn't realize how much you missed him. Dean was with him.

"I'm Dean," he nodded, holding out a hand. You raised a brow.

"We've met."

"I would've remembered someone who looks like you," Dean scoffs, an easy smirk on his lips that probably made many women swoon. You just rolled your eyes, going back into your house and hoping Sam followed.

A week later, the boys were still here. This ghost was frustrating, and it was more the principle of it that was pissing you off more than anything. You let the brothers stay at the house since it was safer in numbers and cheaper. Plus, your roommates took a wide berth of the place before returning. A routine developed in the short time they were here. You cooked breakfast, Sam made coffee, and Dean woke up at some point. You and Sam would enjoy the paper before something happened (usually related to the crossword that Dean was totally not interested in), and you ended up bickering with the older Winchester until Sam got fed up with it and shut it down.

"Stop eyeing her like she's a piece of steak," Sam muttered to Dean when you weren't around, having stormed off to some other corner of the house. Dean almost spit out his coffee.

"The hell? I do not do that. I have no clue what you're talking about."

Sam just nodded, hiding a smirk behind his book as Dean grumbled about not checking you out.

For the first time that week, Sam was out that night. He was following "a lead." What that lead was, no one knew, but it meant you were alone. With Dean. In a house. Without supervision.

You grumbled something about making dinner. Dean followed you.

"Are you lost?" you asked, hands on your hips as Dean plopped himself at the counter.

"I'm following the food."

"Of course you are."

"Please, no more rabbit food," Dean groaned. "I can't take it anymore."

"Oh no, definitely not," you smirked, pulling out some steaks from the fridge you had been saving. Dean's eyes immediately lit up. "You're helping me cook these. I'm not letting your dumb ass sit around while I prepare a meal."

"You're bossy," Dean grumbles but doesn't complain further as he removes his flannel and sets it on the chair. You ignore that he looks really good in a t-shirt and return to grabbing ingredients. To his credit, Dean is good at letting you tell him what to do and following through. He is definitely a better chef than Sam, who has burned many things in your kitchen. Dean is an excellent sous chef. You tell him as such.

"The hell? I am not a sous," he says while furiously stirring butter.

"It's a compliment, you knobhead."

"Knobhead? What 1950s show are you living in?"

This conversation went back and forth for a while. But you finished cooking a meal, which is always considered a success in your book. Dean devoured him almost immediately before you could even finish cutting through it. Then, it was just you attempting to finish your meal in peace. This was difficult, as Dean continuously kept eyeing your food, hoping you might give it to him, and then would complain outwardly when you didn't.

"You're not going to finish it," he drank his beer, once again looking at your dinner. You glared.

"I can finish it."

"A girl like you doesn't finish an entire steak."

That comment pissed you off. You finished your steak in two bites, shocking Dean, and then proceeded to grab his glass of beer and down it in one gulp. You slammed the glass down, raising a brow. "You have no clue what type of girl I am."

You grabbed both your plates and made your way to the kitchen, putting them in the sink and starting to clean the dishes. You barely made it through a plate before Dean pushed you out of the way.

"Dean—"

"I'm not questioning your ability, but in my world, the one who doesn't cook cleans. So, sit your ass down," Dean said before you could chew him out. You bit the inside of your cheek and sat down, still glaring at him as he washed each dish meticulously and put them either in the dishwasher or on the drying rack. When he was done, he threw the dishtowel over his shoulder. The domesticity made you soften. "I'm sorry for earlier."

You blinked, not really expecting any sort of apology from Dean Winchester. You did expect that you would not get anything besides those words.

"I don't understand women."

You laughed at that, leaning on your hand with your elbow on the table. "Aren't you a self-proclaimed ladies' man?"

"I know how to sleep with women, but I don't get what goes through your heads," Dean leaned against the counter, arms crossed. "You want one thing and then a different thing, and I can't keep up."

"So, you're admitting you're slow." Dean threw the towel at you. "Women aren't that complicated; men are just bad listeners. You included."

"I can listen."

"Really? What was I frusterated about at dinner?" you challenged, getting off your seat and leaning over the counter. He blinked a few times.

"That I kept asking for your steak?"

"No, that you presumed that as a woman, I couldn't finish a steak."

"Well, that's not what I said," Dean replied, getting defensive. You just rolled your eyes, grabbing the wine bottle on the counter.

"Oh, also, insight into women; they lie about how good men actually are in the bedroom," you winked, leaving the room and taking the wine with you. You could almost hear Dean's jaw drop.

"It ain't a lie, princess," he intercepted you, his stupid legs moving much faster than yours. You frowned but didn't say anything. Dean took a breath, locking eyes with you. "Why do you insist on always pushing my buttons?"

"Because it's fun? Because you're both annoying and easy to annoy?" you shrugged, clutching your wine bottle to your chest. You didn't know why you picked on him, besides the fact he could be an absolute ASS sometimes that needed kicking. No, you suppose it goes back to early schoolyard days where instead of 'flirting,' you'd push the person and maybe claim to the entire class that they had cooties. To this day, you still had no idea what cooties exactly were, just that you never wanted to catch them.

"I think you like me," Dean smirked. He had crowded you against the wall leading to the living room. Your wine was an innocent bystander clutched to your chest. Maybe not as tall as Sam, but you still had to look up to see him. "I'm gonna prove it."

"Excuse me?" you breathed any sort of bite to your words caught in your throat as he reached up to your face and stroked your cheek. His hands found purchase holding your neck, tilting your face even higher and infinitely closer. Dean took the wine bottle out of your hands, your last line of defense, and stepped away for a second to put it back on the counter. His hands found your face again.

"Hey princess," he whispered, voice sultry. "Breathe." You couldn't do such a thing even if you wanted to because his lips were on yours, and he tasted like the draft beer in your fridge and apple pie. He was gentle, too gentle, and you wanted more. Your hands, first unsure of what to do, grabbed his shirt and pulled him closer. One of his hands moved to your waist, thumb brushing the exposed skin where your shirt rode up. He was everywhere all at once, masculinity encapsulated, and you were drowning in it. He pulled away, letting you breathe, the command you forgot to follow. "I wanted to do that since I saw you."

"Bullshit."

"Honest to god— well, not god, but honest— but then you had to go and be increasingly difficult," Dean scoffed, still holding on to you.

"You don't even remember the first time we met."

"Of course I do; it was a week after my Dad disappeared," Dean responded. "You were wearing pajamas and had a raincoat wrapped around you as you asked Sam not to go so that you could figure it out together. I was curt, and you looked like you wanted to call me a thousand horrible names, but you let it go as we drove away."

You smiled a little at that. "You do remember."

"What can I say? I like pushing your buttons."

You smacked him on the chest, earning a laugh as you fought off your smile. You did finally get your wine and let Dean choose something to watch. About halfway through your movie (and three glasses of pinot noir in), you got distracted by a makeout session that would've made your teenage self swoon, but it didn't progress more than that. Neither of you wanted to go too fast. Most of the time, it was just light conversation, cuddling, and the realization that maybe you two were much more alike than you thought.

Both of you fell asleep like that on the couch, blissfully unaware of the morning light. Sam came home early in the morning, dropping his bags before seeing the both of you entwined on the couch. A smile crossed his face.

"Finally."

taglist: @lover-of-books-and-tea @qardasngan @evasmlp

#dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #supernatural x reader #dean winchester imagine #jensen ackles #supernatural #spn #supernatural fan fiction #spn fan fiction #my writing

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drdemonprince · 7 months ago

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this will sound like one of those "let men be masculine" level niche internet community brained posts, but i honestly really was embarrassed of how much i like drag for a while. in the circles that i run in, liking drag too much is seen as pretty cringey and for wealthy cis gays. like everybody knows a few cool avante garde local performers that they fuck with who run queer dance parties that are inclusive and the like, but very few people that i know will just go to a drag show at an entertainment or social engagement for their own sake. it's almost seen as a tourist thing, a normie gay thing.

but its one of the few spaces where i can actually recognize a lot of feminine men and nonbinary man-thing-girly-freaks like of the particular type that i am. leather bars are so masc and buff and im often invisible. bear bars are really nice and i do feel welcome there! but people are only feminine in their mannerisms, not presentation very often. the more explicitly gender inclusive trans/queer spaces cater to more of a wlw and adjacent crowd whose relationships to masculinity and femininity are different from mine. circuit gay bars are obviously terrible.

drag is nice. there's guys with weird little haircuts and long earrings who aren't buff and are swishy and dress interestingly but are a little uncomfortable as their regular selves and have to don alternate personas in order to be outgoing. and i even like that it's okay to be bitchy and insulting sometimes in drag world, like sometimes that is just your genuine feedback on the work someone has done and it's not the end of the world. there's lot of open conflict in the drag world that actually works out pretty alright.

it's a local nightlife scene like all the rest, its got its theater kid bullshit and egos and superficiality out the ass and so many people are trying to be famous or make money, but even to this day i forget that i can just be a really weird feminine guy until i'm around some of them and watching them prance about. i worry about how i look or am being read and then even just watching a fucking drag race episode i'll see like 9 different guys who are so fucking androgynous with their weird assymetrical self cut haircuts that they pass less than i do and they're cis men. they have bodies or faces like i do. and in the local scene it's obviously even better because you're looking at real life people. maybe i should be over it by now but im not, i need to see weird little awkward feminine guys with funny outfits playing dress up and crying and fighting with one another because they never got over their last picked in gym class baggage. its meeee i relateee. i even like that its a little toxic! we've got some issues out here, let's joke with them and make a character of them instead of pretending to be nice!!

i tend to be pretty skeptical of "representation matters!" type shit but part of that is probably because i never really feel represented. i know, boo hoo, thin white man doesnt feel depicted on screen, sounds very silly. but then i see kade gottmik on drag race and i swell with emotion and suddenly feel like who i am is POSSIBLE in this world and i realize that even with all my privileges i am starved for representation and that it does benefit you to have it. theres trans guys on screen but thats not close enough to ping that ooh!!! ahh!!! i can love myself!! radar for me. it has to be a very particular kinda person. matt bernstein makes me feel similarly

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walnutcookie · 1 month ago

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good day fellow rodger fan, i rlly love your art it gives me whimsy and joy. do you have any headcanons ab him and glisten, perhaps toodles as well? (family dynamics my beloved actually) if not either way i think your stuff is still so rad.

AHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH !!!! <333 WEEPS TEARS OF JOY.... i do have some headcanons hehehe... in no particular order/organization heres some of my thoughts on them:

- Rodger is a sleepwalker. Very Embarrassed by it.

- Toodles really enjoys drawing !!! She likes to draw with the other toons a lot (especially glisten, but he usually just watches her and then treats her art like the mona lisa so she feels good about herself)

- rodgers reaction to any sort of physical affection is really funny because he doesnt know how to react. He wants to keep his awesome and mysterious persona but also he doesnt want to be rude or anything. does he reciprocate? does he try to get away before it happens??? does he say something or does he keep quiet? Usually it just results in him freezing up and going stiff

- also adding onto above he tends to be paranoid about peoples intentions. bro gets a hug from goob and freezes and hes thinking "is this an attempt to console me does he think im mentally unwell or is he trying to find my weaknesses so he can kill me"

- in general rodger can be a very paranoid person and starts panicking at the slightest threat but hes pretty good at stopping to think and clearing his head. Logically he knows goob wouldnt kill him and doesnt know his secrets but it is a thought that pops up in his head for a brief moment

- toodles is always very quick to jump in and try to help whenever someone is upset. She wants to help people as best she can so ofc she would but the problem is that shes never sure what to say to cheer people up :'] she tries parroting some of the things rodger has told her when she was sad but also from her experience it never works so she tries to distract people instead most of the time. it makes her feel really guilty whenever she doenst try to help or if she fails to make them feel any better

- Toodles is very close with teagan!! teagan is like her fun uncle :] they take care of toodles sometimes if rodger is busy (or cough missing). Tea parties galore!!!!

- glisten is romo-repulsed i know this in my heart ok. [i know ive drawn him doing romantic things i cant explain the nuances to this in a cohesive way im just projecting ontohim as a romo repulsed person in a relationship]

- Glisten is definitely introverted but not in the "ohh hes shy and hates people" way hes just drained when he talks to people even if he likes talking to people. He needs to take breaks from socializing a lot to recharge his social battery especially since hes always so worried about what people think of him but he also dies if hes alone too long

- toodles is actually VERY fascinated with bugs if theres an ant or a beetle or a roach or something in the facility shes gonna beg to keep it and make a house for it so she can "give it a better life" (glisten will not scream or freak out but there WILL be visible discomfort on his face and he will avoid that bug like the plague)

- rodger smokes cigarettes . He knows which employee(s) carry them around and will snatch one from their pocket at the right moment when nobody is looking... he tries covering his tracks and flushing everything down the toilet and covering up the smell but ofc he gets found out when theres a clog LOL.

- There was also suspicion when toodles started pretend-smoking and saying she was doing the thing that rodger did but most everyone else just assumed it was toodles being a silly little kid

okie dokieee thats all ill do for now !!! Thank you so much for this ask GAUH im so happy people are interested in my hcs for them n stuff 🥹

#🎉 asks #glisten dandys world #toodles dandys world #rodger dandys world #tw smoking #smoking #🎉 rambles

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pinkmoondoll9shihtzu · 22 days ago

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can i BE honest (yes)(i do not possess the ability hold back)

Well actually i did kind of move in silence for 5 months so maybe thats incorrect but it was reall y hard. (Kinda, it was fun in its own way). Basically i am writing to say I finished my EP like it's literally done but now i am in a dilemma because I don't know how to share it. Despite my best efforts to hype myself up i feel nervous and afraid. it makes me feel really sick! And people may think i'm a person who wears their heart on their sleeve I guess in most situations i do But to share something i worked so hard on feels mercilessly daunting and nauseousssss

i don't think i ever worked so hard on (One) complete thing in my life. I have made a lot of art and taken a lot of photos and even recorded a few singles I have finished a lot of projects I am serious about finishing what I start it causes me great turmoil not to finish things. But this is the longest i ever worked on something. And now I don't know what the fuck to do! it's been finished for like a week. I can't even bring myself to re-listen to it because im fucking SICK of hearing it haha even though i like what i did. i find it to be acceptable. But im horrified at the same time.

i think part of my fear is that i feel it does not really exist within the requisites of any pre-existing genre so sometimes i wonder "Who the fuck is this even for". its a limitation within my mindset i want to release. Maybe I shouldn't be sharing these kinds of insecurities but also i don't really like to project the persona of someone who is immune to self-doubt because i don't rly respect one-dimensional caricatures of deluded confidence. No offencseee. I like ~vulnerability~ yeah yeah we all know that, whatever. Plus i am planning on deleting this post when i wake up so who cares. Nightposters trust pact

i like vulnerability but i dont want to be vulnerable in sharing my hard work xD how do i get over this xD i dont like self promo xD i dont even want to be "me" i dont want to be anything i just enjoy making music its really fun i dont know how i would've coped with the past 5 months since Pochita's accident if i didn't bury myself in music and let it take up all my mental space i just want to have fun i don't like the parts i don't like. Hmph. it would be silly not to share it though i know it would be silly. Why do i care....

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ravewing · 3 months ago

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honestly after rereading arc 2 ive realized that ive come to like the idea of qinter than the actual canon version of it.

like at the end of the day ive been a qinter fan since i was in third grade so of course im going to be biased towards it and itll always hold a special place in my heart but i must say that a lot of their canon interactions were just qibli making jabs at winter to a point where it sort of seemed like he didn't like it anymore?? if that makes sense?? dont get me wrong i love the sunshine x grumpy dynamic but with them idk.

i cant lie i feel like the entire jade winglet completely cut winter off and they were always against him even though literally he was completely justified in pretty much everything he did?? like im sorry but him going to save hailstorm (HIS BROTHER THAT HE THOUGHT WAS DEAD FOR YEARS) rather than going to look for the ancient nightwing who has killed hundreds of his tribe was perfectly reasonable. the vase scene was completely reasonable (could you imagine YOUR best friends defending the man who put you under a spell and wanted to commit genocide on your people and wipe them out entirely?? id be pissed as hell). to an extent, winter being suspicious about moon and the cave explosion was reasonable (i do agree that he came off as very aggressive in that, but at the same time you have to see things from his point of view. how WOULD she have known about the bomb?? not to mention how hes been conditioned and indoctrinated to distrust nightwings).

i feel like qibli especially comes at winter for these things and tells him that hes wrong for it and that hes being toxic even though hes LITERALLY NOT. and the whole thing with him saying that if he had animus magic that he would change winter's personality always rubbed me the wrong way. i feel like toxic is too strong of a word but i dont think that theyd be necessarily healthy together, not until theyve matured a little more and have found better ways to cope with their past traumas instead of repressing it and putting on this charming guy who makes jabs at people persona or taking it out on other people through anger and frustration.

in all honesty i feel like tui shouldve gone with moon not making a choice in the qibli/winter/moon love triangle to sort of show that you dont need to be with someone to be happy and that its okay to stay as just friends– icl, thats how i thought that it was going to end when i first read arc 2. i feel as though moonbli was a little rushed, and i do like the idea of winterwatcher (just like i do with qinter) but i dont think that he's emotionally ready for a relationship. also this is unrelated but when initially reading book 6 i thought that moon was going to end up with turtle; ive always thought that theyd be cute together lol.

im thinking about it now and i really like the idea of turtle and winter but i cant for the life of me remember if theyve ever had any one on one interactions. if theres anything please can someone send in reblogs ..

im getting off topic now so tldr i like the version of qinter that exists in my head but i feel like they shouldnt be together in canon, not at least until they sort out their own issues.

#rave rambles #i feel like this is really incoherent but its ok #wof #wings of fire #qinter #winter wof #qibli wof #qibli x winter

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sharklovingaquarist · 1 month ago

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Ok guys so this is gonna be a long one but Im going to talk about

Male apathy during pregnancy and post partum

Post partum mental distress

How the medical system fails women

How men should do their part

So I just saw a post by a man talking about how men downplay the process of reproduction, and yeah, duh - BUT I've come to a conclusion. There are two types of expectant/new father in this world: the type that treats his wife like a toy or the type that treats his wife like a cute pet and claps for her from the sidelines. "Yeah babe ur so strong" while not doing shit. So in this post, the guy is like "errrrr fellow males, did you know that the nutrients actually come from your wife's body?!?!" Like how is that not common knowledge? The uterus doesn't have little claw arms building a fetus. An embryo is created by a male and female, and that embryo attaches to the uterus and LEECHES from the female bloodstream.

He then he goes on to talk about how much blood we can lose during vaginal birth and c-sections, and Imma just say here and now that the medical system sucks ass. Yeah, birth sucks. Pregnancy sucks. But I kinda hate how people pass of a lot of the pain as a fact of life. The fact is that the medical system is vastly male, and males who put their poorly hidden fetishes into practices (I did veterinary science in highschool, and it was even prevalent there... vaginal speculums and artificial insem- 🤢) I'm sure we've all heard humans should stand to deliver a child. The high death statistic for women in childbirth (also explained by more black women dying than white), the lack of knowledge on the female body, and the priority of babies over women all tells me one thing: Birth is certainly painful, but it may be more dangerous than it should be. My honest opinion is that death rates exploded once men infiltrated our care due to their view of us as a vessel. Maybe if the medical system focused on helping us rather than letting a fetus escape its "flesh box", then we'd be somewhere.

And finally... he talked about post partum mental health... so I've been wanting to talk about this. It has recently become noticeable to me that human females have a hard time mentally after the birth of children meanwhile most animal females don't. Sure, there are cases where animals abandon offspring, but I chalk that up to not being prepared to care for offspring. Nature usually prioritizes an adult over a newborn. Also the abandonment of offspring is something I only really hear about in domesticated animals (and animals in zoos so environmental distress or lack of knowledge), of whom we have fucked over in so many ways through selective breeding. Shit even domestic bettas and angelfish, who are usually good parents, have this issue in domestication. But why is it that other animals don't have nearly as many post partum issues as humans. I'll say it, I believe post partum mental distress is largely due to societal dynamics. Sure, hormones are off, but the society we live in only fuels this. It's like when you're on your period. You feel off but it's more a loss of tolerance. The rise in estrogen near and after birth can cause you to already be a bit unbalanced, but let's add some situations onto it. You're going to be the primary caretaker because of modern male incompetence, then you're going to lose sleep which causes more instability, then you're expected to still cook and clean, and men in most countries don't get paternity (ohhhh I wanna tell yall a story about that so baddddd... its in the comments if ur up for it) so youre left alone with a screaming child while trying to heal and getting no sleep and probably not seeing the sun because youre busy and thats a major mood stabilizer (as someone with a mood disorder) all for the father to come home and play with the infant and pass it right back to you. And we haven't even gotten into the culture surrounding it. Women are expected to put on a loving maternal persona while fathers remain the same. For men being a father is prideful and gives you all these positive characteristics like strength... but for mothers your mind is deemed more simplistic, your identity is erased. People see pregnancy and motherhood as a performance and you are the lead actress. Youre treated differently, percieved differently, and thats fueled by bioessentialism. New moms do not feel more "loving" towards an infant than new fathers. Both secrete oxytocin, it comes with the monogamous, biparental animal package dumbass. Why would I be more loving towards something that sucks my boob off and ripped me open. So while I'm not trying to discredit post partum depression, I'm absolutely saying that societal issues are the pushing force. Im also pretty sure post partum statistics fluctuate based on country, and that in countries with paternity and a more equal dynamic have lower cases. But I'm not mentally stable enough myself to look into it, I know "trust me bro" type shit.

In conclusion 🤓 I'm tired of people seeing female pain and not finding ways to help it. The female body is strong, but it also needs care. You wouldn't expect a person with a broken leg to win a marathon. That's the whole reason males stay with females is to. Do. Their. Part. Idc if I'm picky, but literally, any talk on kids or pregnancy leaves me so dissatisfied. Expect men to start acting like an expectant father and partner during pregnancy. Your job is to comfort, provide, learn how to ease pains, provide emotional labor, drive and GO TO appointments (I think if it was even really "about life" they would look into male health too but that's a convo for another day), pay for appointments, be ready to help in case an emergency, so much more. Cuz it's always "don't drink while pregnant!" But how come the baby daddy can be at the bar with his friends? What if I go into labor? He needs to stay sober too I'm not his broodmare! The way men act like it has nothing to do with them because "well uhhhh I not carry a baby 🤷‍♂️" makes me so mad. As a new father too, they think "well man don't feed baby 🤤" like there isn't so much more. Imo, the man should be doing housework, taking care of the infant besides breastfeeding, and caring for a post partum partner. Even with breastfeeding, you can be involved. Take the infant when it's done eating, sit with your partner, provide company, and bond with your family. I've come to the conclusion that men don't want partners they want a collection. Men cannot accept that they have a weaker role while still being involved. Either he's big strong man or it's weak and my business. And the men that cheer from the side see it as "well she does most of it so that obviously means it's all her business but I'll just tell her she's soooooo strong" not like... telling other men how to do their job. Men are pathetic. Want credit for zero effort.

#radical feminism #abortion #feminism #pro choice #womens rights #sorry this shit is so long im so tired of men cumming in a woman and acting like its none of his business

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townslore · 1 year ago

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if you're comfortable, i would love to know more about the akechi npd headcanon. i think it's a rlly interesting take on his character and i wanna learn more abt npd bc i have bpd and ig im interested in what people experience with the other cluster b personality disorders? i just kinda wanna know why you think he has it and also maybe some of the mental stuff he has to experience with it. doesn't have to be detailed or personal i dont wanna make u uncomfy! i just cant stop thinking abt this hc haha :)

im actually on a mental health break right now, but this ask intrigued me so im answering it anyway. first off thank you for staying kind throughout the whole thing :)

its kind of hard for me to really describe why i think a character has/is something, because things like personality disorders are still a wide spectrum and every person experiences things differently, and i dont wanna make it seem like theres a one-way to have npd, but im gonna try anyway!

there is a site which helped me immensely throughout my self-diagnosis, so if you want to read more about the topic than what im gonna say here, here u go:

lets start simple and the thing that makes it most obvious to me: the engine room dialogue.

people with npd can heavily rely on other people for their self-esteem, because narcissists usually have a very low one. thats why they take on many tasks ("i was extremely particular about my life, my grades, my public image—so someone would want me around!") and might overwork themselves for more praise and acknowledgement ("you wanted to be acknowledged, didn't you? to be loved?") because its what they need to not constantly crash. a crash is something that happens when you dont get enough supply—which can be words of affection, praise, acknowledgement, etc—and you internalize it, doubt yourself, feel disgusting and generally you get to a really low point. this is just speculation, but i can see goro having a ton of those, especially during the time the phantom thieves get popular and he becomes public enemy nr 1. thats also why i drew him thinking "i really need supply rn but i'd rather die than ask for attention" because vulnerability is also a big thing people with npd can struggle with. we dont want to be seen as weak—our narcissism is essentially a shield, so we're seen as tough, when in reality, our egos can be very fragile.

one thing that the engine room makes very clear and also other interactions goro has with akira, is that hes very envious of others who have had it better than him. especially someone like akira, who was thrown away by society just like he was, was able to move past it, found friends and is acknowledged by many people. goro is jealous of it all, and thats the thing; people with npd can feel like they're supposed to be special ( and to me, with goro explaining how he got his personas, and how he often calls others stupid, its clear that he does feel that way about himself to a certain degree ) and anyone who threatens that status, anyone who seems much more special than we are is seen as a legitimate threat. its an ugly feeling and it can make us hate even those we love for some time.

this attributes to dysregulation of our emotions too. people with npd often feel their emotions, especially negative ones, way more intense than they actually should be and have difficulty calming down due to that. negative emotions often linger for a long period of time and its hard to move on so we hold grudges. now this might come to no surprise to anyone that goro is a very angry and sad person. especially in the engine room its clear that even after the others extend their hands out to him, its difficult for him to comprehend and he still acts rather mean and calls them idiots for trying to "save" him. when someone with npd is experiencing a multitude of negative emotions, it may cause them to avoid other people or act aggressive towards them because they feel trapped. theres many explanations as to why goro is the way he is in the 3rd semester, and i dont think only one of them has to be correct, but i do think that with the knowledge of whats happening ( like: being under the control of someone else again, or having to work with people who are unpredictable and who have seen you at your lowest point ) makes him act out to keep all of them, especially akira, at bay.

in the duel against akira—im sorry i cant really quote it, i just have a general idea of it in my head rn—i read what he says in a way that makes it clear that he struggles with a superiority AND inferiority complex, which sounds stupid at first i know, but its fairly easy to explain. like i already said, a narcissist's self-esteem is usually pretty low and we rely on others to know how to feel about ourselves. theres two traits of npd that are necessary traits to have: being self-centered and feeling entitled to good treatment, and seeking admiration from others/liking to be the center of attention. so there is some kind of superiority complex going on, at least thats what i would call it in goro's ( and my ) case. we can feel on top of the world in one moment, but once we have a crash or experience intense negative emotions, its back to being the worst human being on earth. i dont think its ooc to say that goro hates himself, as some like to claim he only ever thinks hes better than everyone else. i think that just attributes to harmful stigma. with everything goro experiences in life, coping with narcissism to hide a fragile sense of being just makes sense to me.

theres more i could probably add here but this thing is long enough as is. please do keep in mind that many of my headcanons for goro are me projecting—but that doesnt mean theres no basis for it in canon as well, as i've tried to explain here. at first i actually thought he could have bpd, but i dont know enough about it to really judge that—so it could still very well be that, or both, i dont really know how it works! im rather new to this as well, and at first i was scared of doing any research because npd is so heavily stigmatized. i wish there were more people like you, anon.

if you have any more questions feel free to ask them :)

#letters #goro akechi #persona 5 #when the towns lore #npd

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suffarustuffaru · 8 months ago

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Looking at your past art has me really loving your drag king Natsumi, do you have any more thoughts on them? I'd love to hear them. Also just your genderbend ideas in general. They are very interesting!

for future reference, here is where i drew some drag king natsumi + sapphic ottosuba :) i definitely plan on making more genderbend au content in the future thats for sure! :o i have another older art post on this here also (i am. too lazy to find it rn but its there somewhere!!) but i have some in depth thoughts about fembaru for sure yes :3 ty for finding my genderbend ideas interesting!! :D !! id be happy to talk about them more :o

im gonna start with outward design stuff / gender presentation first!! :D bc in my head, afab subaru probably looks almost exactly the same. in general, canon subaru’s most likely at least a little androgynous (and i think he probably is judging off of how much he passes as the opposite sex!!), and we know hes got his dad’s spiky black hair and his mom’s mean eyes and general facial shape, has a long torso, that sort of thing, so i think afab subaru would look similar :o

plus i like to treat fembaru as basically just the mirror/foil/inverse of canon amab subaru anyway, so yep natsumi schwartz is gonna be her male persona!! canon amab subaru was mistaken as a girl when he was a child, and he also went to high school (iirc it was high school but at the very least he was about the same age he is during arc 1) for three days as natsumi yes and passed for three days. iirc he would put on the girl’s uniform and wig and stuff on the way to school and out of his parents’ view and then put on the male uniform and take off the wig before he got home!! plus you know he’d generally practice makeup most likely and wig styling and all sorts of things in private.

so definitely afab subaru is doing similar stuff but in the opposite direction now—looking more masc and presenting as a boy. while amab subaru can put on and take off a wig, in my head, afab subaru would probably have to have shorter hair. so one day she just got a haircut thats short enough to where she could style it masculinely but longer enough to where it could still be kinda considered feminine enough!!

im not 100% sure how to draw her hair yet but in my earlier post and a few of my sketches it kinda looks like either a long mullet/wolfcut or a messy bob :3 i think you could probably say that her hair looks more like a wacky bob when shes more feminine and a wolfcut when shes styling it more masculinely?

(^^ my take on fem wrathbaru is here also LMAO)

i also base my fembaru design off of canon natsumi!! with the side bang (though i sometimes draw it on the wrong side akdnd)!! meanwhile fembaru’s male natsumi would have canon amab subaru’s hair :) (which you can see in my earlier post as well!!)

(i like this illustration actually <3)

i also like to hc that on top of subaru wanting to look and act more like his dad in canon, he did also kinda want to resemble his mom when hes presenting more femininely :o also for genderbend aus it depends on whether you ONLY want to genderbend subaru or if you wanna genderbend everyone along with subaru too, that sort of thing. i like to play with both possibilities :o

but in general, i like the idea of subaru either way trying to honor both her mom and dad. maybe to subaru her mom is what an ideal woman should be perhaps, and her dad is the ideal man, bc subarus parents are her biggest role models, so she tries to emulate both at different points in her life. she tries to be the perfect soft sweet girl like her mom and it doesnt work. she leans into being a bit of a delinquent and it doesnt work. then she cuts her hair and learns to present more masculinely and tries to copy her dad only to fail again. :((( then she gets isekaied……

i feel like afab subaru might get a bit more shit for getting into trouble too :(( or for being too loud. shes not very traditionally ladylike, i think!! boys will be boys and of course your daughter takes after you, kenichi, but dont you think shes a little too rough around the edges now?

anyway otherwise in general, i also like the idea that over the course of each arc in the fantasy world, subaru grows her hair out!! and once its long enough she can put it into a ponytail like her mom again :,)))

(male rem is here too <3)

also i like to give fembaru the maid dress instead of the butler outfit!!! probably not with the garter and stuff but 😭😭 its a pretty dress and fembaru should get to express herself both masculinely and femininely :3 in my head, i think subaru would be shy bc AGHH THIS DRESS IS SO REVEALING THERES NO WAY ID LOOK GOOD IN THIS IM NOT PRETTY AT ALL and rem and ram (genderbent or not) are probably like nonsense just try the dress. its your uniform to work here. and subaru does and huhhhh. maybe i dont look half bad ? :,) (bc of course subaru’s insecurities either present themselves the same or slightly different when genderbended). and of course when rem and ram warm up to subaru eventually ram can be like “you dont look as bad as i thought youd look” or something and rem can be like “subaru-kun youre very beautiful anyways!!!! <3”

and also i do think subaru would cut her hair a bit again or style it different for natsumi adventures later in arc 7 <3 just to have that symmetry again. the situation probably might go a little different but yep this is how id handle it 👍

and of course you can give subaru the canon natsumi hair bow sometimes when shes feeling fancy :3

OKAY and now im gonna talk about more character stuff!! lets talk about subarus whole thing with isekai and genre savviness and all that.

one of canon subaru’s many many Many parts making him up as a character and making up his story in general is a deconstruction of the isekai genre!! power fantasy and characters being cardboard cutouts for the male mc to triumph without a struggle—that sort of thing. but afab subaru is a female lead now, and female isekai is different.

id have to do way more research into this and watch more female isekai and shoujo and stuff (ive been Really wanting to watch im in love with the villainess…… someday i will…..). buuut from what ive noticed so far it seems like for male lead isekai the fantasy here is the Power and Prestige, but female lead isekai’s fantasy seems to be the Romance!! not that you cant have OP abilities in female lead isekais and not that every isekai is 100% the same of course. but that seems to be the common tropes from what ive seen so far? male isekai protags have girls throwing themselves at him as trophies, female lead isekais have their male romantic interests and the evil evil villainesses are defeated somehow and perfectly out of the way <3 the fantasy is that youll be loved by The One—the perfect boy(s) <3

and i think amab subaru is less likely to check out much female lead isekai but i think itd be fun if afab subaru would probably focus on female lead isekai but also a bit on male lead isekai as well!! she wants that absolute path to glory AND love. (and ahahhahahaha please ignore the gazillion ikemen anime figurines in her room hahahahahhahhahahahah AND DEFINITELY IGNORE THE SILVER HAIRED ONES. ESPECIALLY THE ONLY GIRL FIGURINE SHE HAS THATS BEEN GATHERING DUST UNDER HER BED—)

but also bc i think amab subarus more likely to go nah i wont look at girly media while maybe afab subarus like godddddddd i want instant OP abilitiessssssssssss and godddddddd i want hot girls around m—WHAT. WHAT. WHO SAID THAT WHO SAID THAT—

anyway so subaru gets isekaied and shes like SWEEETTT A NEW BEGINNING AWAY FROM NOT BEING ABLE TO MEET EXPECTATIONS HAHAHAHAHA IM THE ISEKAI PROTAG!!! THIS IS AWESOME!!! (is about to get her shit rocked). and shes like ooooh do i have any abilities (nope) and oooohhhhhh shit do i have a villainess. AM I THE VILLAINESS???? no way right. anyway lol wheres the ikemen who’ll ill marry one day. the ikemen that falls in love….. with a commoner……… like myself teehee… and they get married…… and the villainess is CONQUERED….

anyway so what im saying is. ………….fembaru is a femcel. AND a pick me. AND a disaster bisexual. you could practically imagine a vine boom after each of those.

i think the biggest most important to me with genderbend aus is keeping the humanity of the characters the same the best i can!! and fembaru is STILL subaru, of course shes fucking cringe!! of course shes got a heart of gold but its under layers of cringe!!! of course shes a nerd who doesnt have any friends at first and trips and stumbles through all the shit being thrown her way!!

also if male subaru is bi then so is fem subaru okay. we’re equal opportunity here. and also amab subaru has issues with his masculinity and uhhhh slight things with women (see: his boob comments in season 1…….. subaru i love you but cmon man). so. afab subaru i think has got a terrible case of internalized misogyny / homophobia / PROBABLY SOME COMPHET TOO LMFAO 😭😭

i think general plot beats (whether its only genderbending subaru or genderbending everyone) goes mostly the same but again, slight differences. im gonna go with only subaru being genderbent atm bc thatd have more differences i think :o

yes ok so subaru’s gonna see reinhard and go GASPPP oh my god. pretty ikemen. ohhhhhh oughhhhh hes so pretty. hes clearly main lead material… ohhhh what do i do ive never talked to people in so long and hes so PRETTY FUUUCKKKKK BUT I DONT WANNA BOTHER HIM EITHER AND PUT HIM IN DANGER. um um um um mmumimimm HE CLOSED THE DISTANCE BETWEEN US TOO???? what the hell what the fuck what the fuck shit shit um think THINK SUBARU THINK YOU HAVE CHARM RIGHT?? YOU CAN DO THIS. YOU CAN CHARM A HOT GUY. ARGGHHH— *explodes*

but also subaru sees emilia and gets that “do i wanna be her or be with her” feeling 😭😭 bc emilias so….. cute…. pretty… and NICE TOO?? WITH A FUN PERSONALITY??? SHIT SHES GOT EVERYTHING!! she went out of her way to save me 🥺🥺 and im just dragging her down 😔😔 BUT FUCKKKK I HATEEEE HOW GOOD SHE IS. and then :,)))) theyre both dying in the warehouse… and the first time subaru feels the touch of another girl in a more intimate light is her and emilia holding hands as they die…………….

SO YEAH THEN SUBARU RBDS :,,)))) so like. do you get what im saying. emisuba and remsuba and satella are subaru’s first sapphic heartbreaks and heartaches. muahahaha!!!! insert more evil laughter here!!!! bc since subarus a girl her relationships with emisuba and remsuba are definitely gonna be perceived (both by other people and rem emilia subaru) more so as friendships first and foremost.

so….. subarus getting the codependent homoerotic teenage friendship bright and early HAH. but i cannot blame her!! i too would go insane if i was put in a new unfamiliar world and i met this cute girl i was both jealous of and a little into and then we both died and the last thing i felt was searing pain and her soft fingertips!!! i too would go insane if i thought this maid was my friend but then she tortured me and—and—

but yeah you know how amab subaru has his whole weird complex bromances with reinhard and julius and otto?? now itll be like that but with emilia (the julius and reinhard…) and rem (the otto….). emilias the girl subaru’s having “do i wanna be her or be with her” weird rivalry shit with (subaru’s internalized misogyny probably also adding to this bc Obviously theyre rivals) and rem’s the girl who brutally betrays subaru personally (worlds worst homoerotic teenage friendship breakup of all time 😭😭) but then she later becomes subaru’s loyal best friend???? crazy shit.

and like emilia and rem are totaaally villainesses in subaru’s way (except emilias sweet af and misjudged by the entire world and subaru doesnt have the heart to fight rem and also shes chugging copium and trying not to think about failed loops. or about her gay feelings). toxic yuri is toxic yuri-ing. subaru doesnt wanna be explicit about it….. emilia isnt sure of her feelings other than stuff like caring a lot abt subaru… and rem is. Rem. so theyre all in gay situationship limbo HAH.

also as an afab person too rip subaru for also having periods while the whole world is ending on repeat 😭😭 LMFAOO. im sure theres medieval fantasy remedies though (and rem is 1000% spoiling subaru on her period)

also no one can tell me that echidna and rem WOULDNT still be into subaru as much as they are in canon. subaru regardless of gender fascinates echidna and her greed. subaru regardless of gender is someone rem will grow very very attached to. and if anything, rem would get way more bold with afab subaru.

bc the thing with female relationships is that i feel like theres a higher level of intimacy that you gotta go to for it to be considered more romantic or homoerotic. with guys it could be like holding hands and other people might be like WOAH THATS GAY, but if girls do the same thing its like aww youre such good friends. i think rem would take advantage of her and subaru being the same sex and she’d probably keep trying like “hey um um wanna cuddle together?? in the same bed?? and bathe together teehee?? i can help do your hair and dress you up? and make lots of cute dresses for you ? :) <3 🥰 and i can even massage your bo—I MEAN YOUR BACK. YOUR BACK!!” or it’ll be like. rem gets a little too happy that her and subaru’s periods get synced up or something 😭😭 shes Not Normal (and unfortunately subarus probably a little too into that)

also unfortunately the other time a girl touched subaru intimately was satella squeezing her heart :(((( and hahahah between that and rem and emilia and later echidna…. ohhhh poor subaru and her terrible toxic yuri 😭😭 her sapphic experiences and experiences with women have not been 1000% great.

but also of course subaru is so very not normal. you have the canon typical “lol every memory is a good one <3 even rem torturing me teehee <33” and also i just think itd be funny if you as an audience is lead to believe subarus jealous of emilia and rem’s boob sizes and no. no shes just gay. shes GAY.

and stuff like everything going on with julius and otto gets recharacterized too. bc subarus a girl and the guys are guys its probably gonna get perceived more both in and out of universe in a more. Quite Literally Straightforward light. esp bc subaru’s still gonna be into reinhard and julius lbr HAH.

i want arc 3 to still be an absolute fucking disaster with fembaru. let fembaru be flawed and ugly!!!! so in my au thoughts here itd be like. subaru feels jealous and threatened by lots of people. emilia, though its subsided a bit after becoming friends and after learning a bit more abt emilia as a person. but also i think subaru could feel so so jealous of the royal candidates!! esp crusch priscilla anastasia even though subaru will 1000% think theyre bitches at first during arc 3. bc theyre such strong determined women who seem way more confident than subaru herself is…. and also im sure there’ll be complex thoughts from her on felix too bc crossdressing… gender presentation… is a complex thing for subaru.

and subaru with julius is like. “get away from emilia!!!! shes mine!!! shes MY best friend that im homoerotically codependent on and obsessive of!!!! and also youre just trying to steal reinhard’s ikemen male lead spot huh!!!!! bastard!!!! (i hate that youre so pretty too)” and everything of course blows up in subaru’s face. im sure at some point in the story subaru might get slutshamed for having all these connections to people and romantic threads (especially since shes afab) but also its like. wow shes such a stupid girl lol causing a racket.

and uh being a man beating up a girl looks a little worse due to gender roles and stuff but lot of the knights are still gonna want to go after subaru and julius is still gonna want to save subaru. :,,)))) arc 3 emisuba breakup….. worlds worst sapphic breakup of all time…. and later rem will be the one that got away also :(((((

but yeah i think in general this subaru’s connections would be a little more. subtexty with the girls bc she’d be more hesitant to be explicit. but a bit more explicit with the guys bc itll be easily perceived as romantic in and out of universe. and of course subaru i think will be flustered in different ways between the girls vs guys—with the girls its OHH GOD I CANT BE GAY I CANT BE GAY NOOOOO I HAVE A RIVALRY!!! IM SO JEALOUS OF THEM!! BUT. BUT I LIKE THEM!! OHH GOD. with the guys its OH NO. GOOD LOOKING GUYS???? FML. FML!!!!! WHERES MY MAIN CHARACTER CHARM??? HOW DO I TALK TO GUYS???? JULIUS STOP MAKING FUNNOF ME!!! >:(((

also brief note on otto bc things are probably gonna go different here qkdnd. like i definitely am of course of the opinion that otto fell in love with subaru. in every damn arc in every damn main route otto side content hes getting unhinged over subaru in a way that i think makes a little less sense if you dont view it as otto just Not Being Normal About Subaru in a perhaps vaguely homoerotic way. Possibly? Maybe? Schrodinger's relationship blues.

but subarus afab now!! and ottos still a guy!!! and reinhard and julius are friendly with subaru right, but at around arc 4 things they dont show explicit romantic interest. (i think arc 5-6+ julisuba and juliemisuba would be 👀👀👀 though.) but otto?? in a universe where subaru is a girl??? well now its more acceptable for him to be grow openly head over heels for subaru. but also its probably also more pathetic bc now its probably gonna be more obviously taken by others as otto having a Romantic crush on subaru. regardless of whatever otto's feelings are.

and subarus had her arc 3 development right. but here its like. you wanted a male character who’d fall in love with you and be loyal to you and do Anything for you???? here you go!!! but also given otto is Like That and gets worse by arc 7-8 i think hes gonna seem a bit more sinister. not that canon otto with canon subaru isnt sinister but theres different connotations to male otto paired with female subaru. bc it sort of follows straight dark romance rules, right, with the cunning possessive male love interest and the female protagonist…

i doubt anything explicit would go on between otto and subaru in an au like this bc 1. otto and his avoidant attachment LMFAO and 2. subaru and her issues also and 3. subaru in main route is Not as into otto to the same extent or degree otto is HAH.

and fembarus probably like. i think itd be funny if she was a little disappointed otto wasnt a girl 😭😭😭 but then later hes weird about crossdressing and shes like why dont you wanna do it huh 👁👁👁👁 why are you weird about it 👁👁👁👁 im staring at your glass closet right now—

and also its like. “WHY ARE YOU THE FIRST BOY TO ACTUALLY BE IN LOVE WITH ME WHAT???” which i think is hilarious but i also think it could be fascinating in terms of playing with gender!! bc otto may want to be in control of things, but hes also so subservient to subaru anyway. otto and subaru are both androgynous; otto can pass as a girl and subaru can pass as a boy. if you wanna simplify things further you could also explain this as—otto is a man who looks like a woman who’s pledged his servitude to a woman who looks like a man. very intriguing imo!!

but of course ottosuba power dynamics are Always shifting over and over like a game of tug of war, but the most common thing is that otto will bow his head to subaru but under the surface ottos trying to be in charge. that sort of thing!! and the idea of male otto servicing female subaru is an idea rezero ao3 seems to like also but :,) lets just say its not fully to my taste haha :,,))

and otto is definitely not gonna beat up subaru’s ass so easily this time around bc itd look so bad and he’d know that lmfao 😭😭

but i think theres a lot of potential to play around with gender roles and such with all of these dynamics!! im very passionate about making my genderbend au ideas as wild and layered as possible :o !!

this is all my main ideas atm (and id love to draw stuff like more drag king natsumi or fem reinsuba :) ) but yes i hope this all makes sense :D !! thanks for reading this far and thanks for the ask!!

#rezero #re:zero #natsuki subaru #uhh should i tag the others….. i guess so #reinhard van astrea #julius juukulius #emilia #rem #otto suwen #ask #gender au #genderbend #save for later #i need to write or draw more stuff on this eventually :<<

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enden-k · 6 months ago

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btw now that i can get to it (was busy and had someone over) i can babble a little abt zzz and give my thoughts so far on it if anyone is still wondering whether they should try it or not

first thing i have to say is, to me it feels like a cozy casual kinda game. and i love it. i think thats the part i saw some ppl complain abt

it reminds me a lot of P5 w the overall vibes etc (i played on first release years ago but not the additional stuff afterwards so idk if there were changes to the plot or anything with whatever royal is about) and it was a comfort game for me back then so yea. this might add a lot to why zzz feels like such a comfort game to me

the siblings are not active, playable characters in combat since theyre the proxy guiding and supporting the playable characters (agents) in the hollows (compare it to domains). outside of the hollows you run around with ur chosen sibling and whoever you picked, the other doesnt disappear or becomes irrelevant. they are a unit, run their video store together, theyre one proxy, supporting each other. i already love how trailblazer is more vocal than traveler but the siblings are active, talking parts in cutscenes and whenever theres dialogue choices, your chosen sibling ACTUALLY SAYS IT. this is smth i wished for a while in gnshn so seeing it in zzz made me super happy. it gives them sm life and gets me into it idk how to say it

(this is them btw. pretty mfs)

anw its not overwhelming like gnshn feels to me. gnshn has sm to explore and sm story and its smth i both enjoy and feel exhausted by. now, if you played persona or are familiar, its easier for me to use for comparison. you get to run around as the chosen sibling in the city but the fighting (w the agents you pull from the gacha) all happens in the hollows (similar to when you enter the metaverse). it runs with a day-night cycle and depending on the time, npcs and quests pop up. you can pass the time if you need a specific time of day for an objective, by doing hollow exploration or simply resting in ur room. theres side stuff you do, like running your store and visiting the arcade and play snake akjscbk

the combat itself reminds me of HI3 and wuwa and feels super smooth and fun to me

it has cutscenes etc but the story parts in between are illustrated and presented in a comic/storyboard kinda way? which fits the whole video/movie aesthetics well. its pretty cool

overall, if you didnt try it out yet bc you think it requires lots of energy and time like gnshn, its nothing like that at all. ofc im not through with everything but so far it feels like a very nice game to play casually, w a big cozy bonus when youre spending the day freely in game. i play only on pc or on console when i wanna lay down but this game even i would play on phone or ipad to chill akjscbk

the characters are also pretty fun and cool looking! like, look at them, so far we got

the most chaotic ragtag group in all of new eridu (they share one braincell and its anby who is in charge of it)

fresh looking heavy industry workers (they have a bear)

classic horror housekeeping service who will poison ur tea ig

motorcycle gang (oggling the glasses guy and boss lady super hard, they will be mine when playable-)

public security (they have an actual catboy in case weve got catboy enjoyers here)

special hollow operation elite squad aka the coolest strongest mfs out there taking care of hollow disasters

ALSO THE NPCS!!! LIKE!!! look at the cook!!! tinmaster running the coffee shop!!! the girl selling gadgets or the bunny person running the arcade!!!

even the regular npcs just roaming the streets. theres lots of cool details and life in every bit, its really cool

anw!! idk if this helped or made sense, this is also just my own impressions and feelings so far so yeee. if someone decides to play, i hope you will have fun and get whoever you really really want!!

#tldr cozy casual game i enjoy w ltos of fun n cool characters #babbles #long post #zzz tag #tbd

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kai-rio · 1 month ago

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ggy song analysis III - the liar by the arcadian wild

im so normal about this song, the first time i heard it i immediately knew it was super uber ggy coded

(this is a long one so ill put my analysis under the cut)

by the way, i use greg and gregory as terms for different people - gregory for the character in sb, and greg for the persona we see in ggy

i sense theres trouble ahead, clear by the signs and warnings i think gregory would know that somethings up because i mean its probably pretty obvious if you have lots of gaps in your memory, or if he only gets control back for a little while after a long period of greg taking control, then he’d know thats weird too

that should tell where all blame is due, so why are they pointing at my head? this could be read as gregory not knowing the things greg’s done and being confused, if he notices vengeful tony & ellis then he wouldnt know why theyre vengeful

all have been led astray, we’ve all fallen short in some way literally a line in the game omg. but yeah i imagine during the short moments of control, gregory seeks comfort in vanessa and/or the other followers like finbarr or tape girl because he’d know theyre going through the same thing

please understand im ashamed he would feel guilty for greg’s actions once he actually remembers them or is told them by someone else

and i beg of you, please find your grace i think this reads as gregory trying to warn greg’s victims, like tony and ellis, but he’s unable to actually do anything

cause i'm not in a right state of mind, i just wish i had strength to admit it i doubt gregory would accept the idea of being one of the followers immediately and he might have fallen into a state of denial in a way

my stubborness will put up a fight, but i dont deserve to win it however, when he does accept it, he’d feel immense guilt, so much that he thinks he doesnt deserve to be forgiven despite how badly he wants it

we’re left in the dark, pondering our mistakes this could be gregory trying to piece together what happened during his amnesia gaps

in the light i swear i will deny it all i personally think that if gregory was to find out while he was still being controlled periodically, malhare might just try gaslight him into thinking otherwise to make him more compliant

cause i am the lying man, and i have made you my next victim ‘i am the lying man’ sounds like a title, maybe like greg confessing he’s ggy before he eliminates tony. the next victim obviously because the victims before were the therapists and i guess you could even count vanessa since he manipulates her - tony wouldnt be the last victim either, it probably continues on to ellis, crystal and maybe even cassie if gregory never escaped the control fully

oh i need you to see through my act, to tell me im wrong, to take off the mask again, this is about gregory trying to warn tony and ellis about his murderous counterpart, and it could be interpreted that taking off the dr. rabbit mask is a metaphor for freeing gregory, similar to how in the princess quest ending, our first sign that vanessa is free is that her mask has been abandoned

or else ill be left in the lie obviously this about still being trapped under the influence, but i also have another interpretation of this - i think that during the influence, gregory dissociated to an imaginary world where all the bad things didnt happen to cope with what he could remember, omori style

and ill decieve my way straight to demise i know everyone celebrates gregory for being like the first alive fnaf kid in the games but i honestly dont think thatll stay that way for long with how fnaf has a history of dead kids lol

i am the host of this hostility if the ‘wizards favourite apprentice’ line is true and not just greg pretending, then it would make sense for everything to revolve around him - he’s trusted enough to manipulate another follower and carry out a lot of murders so i would think its true. this probably means that gregory is under more surveillance than any of the other followers which would make it more difficult for him to escape

another interpretation of this is a ‘host’ that a parasite uses - this could imply that each of the reluctant followers personas’ arent specific to their body and could just inhabit a new one - this could be disproved by saying that each follower we’ve seen (vanny and greg) have made their names centered around their body’s original inhabitant, but then again that could just be them rubbing it in vanessa and gregory’s faces about their lack of control, or perhaps it was commanded by the mimic1 virus

im the master magician that makes you believe speaking of the mimic, if i remember correctly, there was a room in sb with a bunch of staff bots representing the afton family, and william was framed as a magician if sorts - the mimuc is supposedly mimicing afton, so it would make sense if it called itself a magician

im real, im not fake, but in reality im a lying man honestly i just think greg would be a fan of paradoxes and stuff like that, seeing how he led a trail of breadcrumbs for tony to follow

my lifes become this grand game of deception in gregs eyes, tony could be treating the whole ggy mystery like a game to be finished, a grand game because theres a high possibility of there being way more followers than we realise, already with 4 confirmed ones (vanny, greg, finbarr & tapegirl as far as i know)

my minds ignored all my hearts good intentions his mind because its mind control… yeah - this could also represent gregorys learnt behaviour of closing himself off from others to avoid them becoming another face on the missing posters despite only having goid intentions

we all feel this tension, we all have our own illusions the followers again, i imagine they all have their own ways of coping, perhaps by simply blocking everything out or pretending/dissasociating

#im normal i swear.#ok no im actually insane can you tell /silly #i love this song so much its just so ggy coded it brings me so much joy #if anyone has any other interpretations id love to hear them!!!#song analysis #fnaf ggy #ggy #fnaf tony #tony becker

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drifloonz · 1 month ago

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Haiiii, can you write a little one-shot or smth about Steven meeting someone online while playing video games and he maybe just starts to get attached to this online persona and then he finds out they're going to his town for vacation and he just

loses his mind

hi guys im actually replying to age old asks for once Can YOU BELIEVE IT !?!? [ i cant either ]

i got inspiration to write although probably temporary so YAYYY

anyways remember that one persona 3 social link . What if it was good and also not weird and groom-y and also Steven Was There. thats basically the gist of it

steven x reader ( meeting via online games )

_____

♡ steven wasn't one to go outside much. especially nowadays. this is something he knew intimately- mostly because he lives in his own body, as much as he wished he didn't on most days.

♡ so, when he isn't rotting in bed, and on the rare days he has energy to actually do anything, an old tucked away hobby slowly emerges in his long self-isolation.

♡ the computer still works. it's honestly a surprise, he hasn't checked the thing probably... since then. he was on it just before it happened. arceus. it was so long ago now.

♡ either way, with a bit of frustration he gets it set back up again. he played more on consoles, but... pcs have less limits. he could at least distract himself from his endless self-induced misery.

♡ and for some reason, his internets still running. he doesn't pay the bill - that was usually what [̸̻̂ ̸̻̿Ṁ̶̢̈ Į̵̼͊͒ Ḳ̸̛̀ È̶̖̋ ̸̡͊ͅ]̷͍̠͊̔ did. he doesn't pay much attention to why though- just assumes nobody ever wants to even slightly touch anything related to him. some part of him takes a pride in being feared by most of kanto. an old part of him, seated deep in his mind feels awful about it. absolutely awful.

♡ anyways, these are headcanons about steven and you meeting eachother through some online games remember when it was about that. yea . anyways.

♡ it's all he does nowaday if he ever has energy to do literally anything. his computer - a clunky desktop - is a real outdated model. but how would he even get a new one? so, he sticks to what he has. one day if he ever finds a way to, having a much more modern sort of laptop would be nice. a good distraction.

♡ whatever he's playing is probably outdated, old, for lack of a better term archaic. he honestly prefers it that way- leaves him room to breath, able to be not overwhelmed by swarms of people who could possibly find him, talk to him - talking to people scares him. he'd have to process... a lot of things if he did. smaller communities to deal with. more homey. he can interact whenever he wishes. people aren't in his face unless he wants them to be. it's nice.

♡ plus, it's a little nostalgic. he used to mess around lightly with these sorts of games. internet isnt a common thing to have, especially not in pallet of all places- but, as time passed, the tech improved. not that he has any of it other than an outdated pc model. hell, he might still have to use some AOL type of thing.

♡ it's nice. he misses playing them, so he tries to make it a thing he does on some sort of schedule, when he doesn't feel miserable. when he wants to award himself for not giving up entirely on his life yet. despite basically already doing that given the isolation, but ... it's a slow step forward either way.

♡ he only talks in the chat to ask questions. mostly because the internet is serviceable, but slow and inconsistent- googling things is not a learned skill of his. asking help isnt something he likes to do ( hell, look at him after he lost miki - although it's a bit different when everyone looks at you like a miserable stray animal ), especially given he doesnt like talking ever, but its kind of his only option that makes sense. plus, people don't actually know him... that's a plus.

♡ and, there's a specific player that talks to him a lot. helps him through things. is overly helpful. it's almost annoying. ... well, moreso overwhelming. it's hard to know what he properly feels when he hasn't been socialized in a while- everythings like that, especially with this person.

♡ he warms up to it slowly though. they are pretty helpful. it's nice. sometimes they'll give him free weapons or armor too. not extraordinarily overpowered, but enough to let him drift by the earlier game, which he appreciates. he says he'll find a way to pay them back someday.

♡ weeks into months into more months of keeping up a schedule. part of him barely cares about the game anymore. he's gotten a lot of progress, not much to do other than grind in these old games at this point.

♡ he knows a lot of things about you at this point. favorite color, your pokemon, what you like to do, your hobbies... he didn't offer much in ways of conversation, but he's always been a very good listener, according to people who he used to know back then.

♡ you're a very passionate person. it kind of draws him in. he tries to be more open with himself in turn, although still being very closed off and secretive due to just the nature of. well. everything about his situation. he doesn't lie about basically only sleeping and doing this all day though.

♡ they said that it sounded sad, but they knew how it felt, being in a similar ( although not nearly as extreme ) situation. he simply agreed.

♡ part of him knows he comes back not for the game, but just to see you. this part of him will never be willingly acknowledged by him.

♡ ... that is until during one of their talks about real life ( more often once steven had stopped being able to really engage with the game in any interesting way, usually he'd just lend an ear and maybe reply a few times in between... small, but short conversations. they had heart to them, able to talk about their life, interests, and struggles passionately. he admired that. ) they mentioned going to kanto.

♡ this makes him go insane even though he knows it really, really shouldn't. they would never even see him. nobody even knows he exists, practically. nobody even remembers he exists either. but.. part of him wants to see someone. someone he kind of knows, even if not all too deeply, it's still some form of personal connection. more than he's had in ages, and genuine, too.

♡ but the idea of seeing someone he met on the internet scares him far more than it has any right to. and also saying that he also lives there and wants to see them would be weird. extraordinarily weird. stranger danger.

♡ still, he has to mention it right ... ?

♡ blankly, he just replies something along the lines of "oh. i live there."

♡ the conversation coasts by pretty quickly from there, steven just kind of dissociating the way through as the person on the other side of the screen says they didnt know he was kantonian, getting excited themselves seemingly about the prospect of 'maybe seeing him in passing at the shop' as a joke. that sentence terrifies him and also makes him feel other things he doesn't want to process.

♡ he does not have the heart to tell them he would never be seen dead in public nowadays. outside of a few... rare, specific instances. when he was younger after everything, mostly. everything he did back then was for her. it isn't now because he gave up. he knows she isn't really there, won't really be back properly ever.

♡ good fucking god this is depressing just thinking about it. why does this person like him so much? he's just... sad.

♡ in his dissociative haze, he blinks 3 times. looks back at the screen. something along the lines of "well, if you wanted to see me you could've just said so ;P" . it's very cute. and also terrifying to his very unsocialized mind.

♡ oh my god. he scrolls up the messagelog just a bit. did he reply "that'd be nice" to the shop thing???? what the fuck is wrong with him. he must've been on autopilot. it's. .. not a lie, but, this is a lot for him.

♡ still he answers truthfully.

♡ and here he is. a week or so later awkwardly lying in bed, knowing this- stranger feels both right AND wrong to call them. he does like them, but, he doesn't... know them. not in real life. he knows what goes on in their real life, but is that enough?

♡ they did tell him pretty personal things. he listened to them when no one else seemingly would. fuck. he doesn't want to let them down. but also maybe it'd be better if they didn't meet? he's not a good rolemodel. not anymore. very unkempt as a person too. he did at least try to clean himself up a bit before this. he looks the same as usual, just a bit .. more organized.

♡ is it clear he barely has any experience with talking to other people online because he was raised in a very small town and had a lot of people around him, because. Yea.

♡ what if he ruins everything. what if he ruins another thing he had because of how he is. what if they immediately get scared and run off? he is abnormally tall, and, last he checked most normal people get scared of him immediately.

♡ this anxiety is not helping him. it's... one person. he doesn't want to ruin it. but if he keeps his cool, maybe it'll be fine? he's trying really really hard to be composed about all of it on the surface.

♡ they agreed to meet. not at his house. although it's where he lives ( or moreso rots away ) and does anything, forcing himself to go outside to at least meet them at a route or a street or on some... bench, would probably be preferable. plus, not that many people. ( 'never seen dead in public', huh steven? it's funny now. this person does things to him. it's... honestly nice. to want to see someone so badly. even if it doesn't go well, it's more of an experience then the mindnumbing isolation. )

♡ he gets on his usual attire, despite the odd looks from others he might get for it,

♡ and so, he goes.

____

thank you for requesting ^_^ enjoy the cliffhanger and Imagine whatever u want in ur hearts desire . the rare inspo to write hit me ig lol - wispy

#wispy writes #steven strangled red #strangled red x reader #steven strangled red x reader #writing this after watching wayneradiotv play like. fucking meridian 59 or whatever makes me think steven would be playing some shit like #that bc its OOOOOLD . I joke ab him playing league but he literally has an old clunky desktop pc that is not made for games.#that or some runescape-esque game. old mmos either way #this is not very personal or x readery and more of an introspective type of hc post more in stevens perspective #so . Oops! Its all Stevens Thoughts !

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