#i haven’t even found how to get there | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dorliart · 1 year

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Me every time someone talks about something that’s "in the depths" in tears of the kingdom

#i haven’t even found how to get there #and tbh I don’t plan on doing it anytime soon #I am having a great time being in the air and on the ground thank u very much #I have explored some caves but like #the small ones I guess #jumped down wells and things #but that’s about it #i am not in a rush lmao #totk #zelda tears of the kingdom #zelda totk #zelda spoilers #totk spoilers #i think #the legend of zelda

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thejadecount · 3 months

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This pride month made my brain get maxley rot

#maxley #max x bradley #NO BUT SERIOUSLY #WHERE DID THIS COME FROM #I just found out about it today #AND I AM OBSESSED #the extremely goofy movie #max goof #bradley uppercrust iii #like #what #I need coleydoesthings to do a video on this #IT HAS SO MANY FICS WTF #WHY DOES IT WORK SO GOOD????#WHY AND HOW AM I ACTUALLY INTO IT???#I forgot this movie existed until today #I can’t believe fucking maxley is what is going to get me out of my writer’s block #fucking MAX X BRADLEY OF ALL THINGS #pride month #love wins #so called ‘free thinkers’ would give Disney their souls if they made Maxley canon #I’m talking about me #I’m the free-thinkers #genuinely I haven’t been this obsessed about a ship so quickly since #fucking uh #I can’t even remember #even Luigi x browser didn’t have such a chokehold on me #why. why do they have such good chemistry—#I can’t believe I’m tagging this #disney

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cuteniaarts · 2 months

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Small drawing collection of my latest creation Emran as a teenager/freshly minted Air Acolyte, for my dear partner in unhinged OC shenanigans @katkastrofa, as promised <3

#my art #artists on tumblr #the legend of korra #original character #I need to figure out a way to tag these guys #like with renny and dori I just put sotrl in front of their names and that works #but emran is technically an LaF character. though not uniquely tied to that verse. and idk what to do with Ila and Alasie #maybe I need to have some unique oc tag or smth. I’ll figure it out #if you’re wondering why I stayed up until half past 7 a.m to draw this it’s because I needed some way to cool down #after the kuviren smut absolutely broke my brain #and what better way to do that than by drawing my sweet baby boy?#yes lmao he went from baby girl to baby boy in like 24 hours. fucking sue me #but actually. actually!! they’re both. they contain multitudes :)#they probably haven’t even realised that at this point and are still in disguise #convinced that she’ll be punished for her deceit if anyone found out that she’s actually a girl #(okay off topic but the switching pronouns are really fun lmao)#but give them time. they’ll figure it out soon enough. in these pieces they’re slowly getting used to temple life #and that is the first step to self acceptance #I’m actually extremely proud of these. especially the one with the apple basket. I feel like the androgynous vibes are really there #and he looks like his brother the most in it #but the others are fun too. I loved doing the portrait. I should do them more often #and.. I will admit. I traced the lemur. I can barely draw people okay how do you expect me to draw animals #but I just think that Aiza would really love a little lemur friend #animals don’t judge and she doesn’t have to watch herself around them. she can just be. plus the lemurs are really cute <3 #I want to eventually do a companion to this with Aiza instead. maybe from back before she ran away #probably something based on reflection from Mulan too bc the vibes are there. though.. to be completely honest #I’d say they have a lot more of Shurochka Azarova’s vibes than Mulan. but that’s just my love for Soviet cinema taking over #it’s essentially if mulan fought napoleon instead. and when discovered instead of left to die they promoted her to lieutenant 😁#I realise the comparison is completely incomprehensible to everyone but me but.. go watch the hussar ballad. it’s free on YouTube with subs #okay enough rambling. i shall now go to bed. @ Kat I hope this brightens up your morning at least somewhat. I love you!!

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gothmiqote · 11 days

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Varha keeps poking at me with more Family Lore TM as an explanation for why her current relationship with Rhaya’ra is Like That & it’s coming in the form of “actually Three of us survived the calamity physically but one is suspiciously Not Present Now & also she was definitely Rhaya’s favourite sister :)”

I don’t have a name for this sibling yet but she’s. Definitely not going to be making any present day appearances that’s for sure.

#it wasn’t technically the calamity that killed her off #but the emotional/mental repercussions in the following years took their toll and. yeah.#anyway no lore yet on who found the body #rhaya’ra Knows it wasn’t varha’s fault it wasn’t anyone’s fault #but like. that doesn’t mean it doesn’t also weave its way into the resentment he’s held onto to get him through his own grief #i maintain he’s not a bad person despite how he treats her she’s just the target of his own projections sadly #it’s a complicated relationship. varha hangs onto it in small ways bc she doesn’t want to feel like she’s entirely lost everyone.#and besides that she always knew she sort of ranked pretty low in terms of favoured siblings/general importance #so when he goes off on her in sharlayan after they haven’t seen each other in a few years she just takes it which is VERY weird for her #but like. what can she do? lose the last piece of her family? she loved them even if she was a bit of an afterthought #her sister def treated her better but was also too wrapped up in her own suffering to do anything about it #so she just got used to being self-sustaining bc what other choice was there #oc tag #varha naiarro #rhaya'ra nariarro

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hightowres · 8 months

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why do i feel like there’s some sort of veil between me and the rest of the world

#like i just feel like there’s this weird seperation #ppl all seem to have such full lives and be so connected with friends and stuff #but it feels like i can’t fully join in??#like i have friends and ppl i love and hobbies and whatever like i have a life #but sometimes it feels like i blinked one day and everyone else found their ppl and their super close knit #and i’m just like?? how do i cross this invisible curtain between me and everyone else #like sometimes i meet someone and we get along super well and then we just don’t hang out more #maybe bc i suck at texting ppl back #but i feel like nothing ever deepens #anyway #ignore me #today was a good day #apart from one thing lol #even on here like i love love love my mutuals but i lowkey feel like everyone’s closer with other ppl than with me??#i’m think i’m feeling a bit lonely bc i’ve been so busy lately i haven’t spent much time with anyone #and it feels like i just am missing out a lot #and i’m definitely someone who appreciates having alone time but i do actually like socialising and connecting with ppl #talking to ppl is one of my favourite things ever i think there are so many incredible ppl to find out more about and become friends with #nadiya.txt

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crossbackpoke-check · 2 days

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Dysprosium, Mary Soon Lee

dysprosium, AN 66, is a silvery-white rare earth metal. its name is derived from the greek dysprositos, meaning “hard to get at”, owing to the difficulty in separating and isolating this rare earth element. dysprosium is used to measure neutron flux, to fuel reactors, and to activate phosphors. terfenol-d is a magnetorestrictive alloy, meaning that it changes shape when a magnetic field is applied, and is used to manufacture underwater acoustic systems.

jason “robo” robertson, dallas stars #21 for @simmyfrobby’s nhl periodic table poems <3

#i had a couple different ideas for poems that were taken by the time i could go deranged for a couple hours to make this but as I looked #i was like WAIT NONE OF YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE JASON ROBERTSON YOU HAVEN’T SEEN MY TEXAS CAM and had to do it. also was STRUCK with the #sudden immaculate vision of the Dallas D as part of terfenol-D and could not get it out & robo is the most dance! person i know on the team #liv in the replies #dallas stars #jason robertson #nhl periodic table poems #guys i am plagued with visions and no execution skills!! every day i come here and learn one new skill on GIMP the way god intended!!!#today it was emboss. also cannot claim any credit for the pulse to the magnetic beat photo which is so cool that was one where i had a #couple and was like maybe i can do like crayon shockwaves like the art process video kasper showed? and then found that picture and was #like thank you lord stanley for knowing my limitations. thank you for your understanding in this moment it was a trial enough to make #expand contract dance and one would THINK i would have fucking learned from the claude animorphs tragedy!! i did not. but i did use the #shear tool and 3D rotate so at least if we’re animorphing it’s SLIGHTLY better. anyway me frantically doing this like WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT #WAIT FOR ME YOU GUYS ARE SO FAST i keep seeing all of these and just spinning around in circles until i get dizzy & fall down I’m so happy #the drive folder for this is just called joy!!!!! because joy this is such a cool idea but now because it brings me so much joy #i just saw the Travis dermott one and burst into tears super normal AND someone did exactly what i wanted with hydrogen which was the water #the ice!!!!! it’s so perfect!!! and cody ofc did silver lord stanley. like does it ever make you cry how beautiful & creative everyone is?#anyway if you see me post and delete this and then update it or change it no you didn’t it’s fine. but i wanted to be included #if i could make the dysprosium letters not have a white background i would I simply could not fuck with it at 1AM. we are hitting send #it may not look like it but i queue #pretend i spoke at length about the reasons why i picked all the pictures & the element just know that it’s there inside my brain u can ask #GUYS I TAKE IT ALL BACK I SAW NEONFRETRA’S ISOTOPES AND I COULD MAKE THE EDITS EVEN THOUGH THEY’RE THERE!! ISOTOPES!!!! YOU GUYS!!!!!!#get ready for the edits then. dylan magnesium my beloved child of stars who can never return… like i wish i could say anyone else but it’s #i KNOW number nineteens bismuth don’t make me Google how many years nolan played hockey but also there’s ej for stable so.. also half-life #actinium claude giroux my beloved… when i saw there already was a claude i thought maybe Brady too for that #I don’t know how but flerovium doubled magic is percolating in my brain as was promethium bad boy because I was like hmmm. tyler. but #couldn’t commit and THEN SOMEONE DID BAD BAD LEROY BROWN TYLER BERTUZZI TO PROMETHIUM AND BESTIE I AM KISSING YOU ON THE MOUTH!!! with cons #anyway shane wright germanium with juraj slafkovský but showing him very obviously not missing it. if jack eichel was not an asshole #the narratives WOULD be narrativing. you could argue for a sidovi here with the calder cup and potentially a best friend stealing narrative #(the most recent is cam yorke’s acquisition of jamie d from trevor zegras which would then require a yorkie one for silicon the other side)

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flashhwing · 11 months

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I think im only gonna plan my campaign up to level 10 then whatever happens happens. leaving the plot from there up to my players. your turn to weave the narrative bitch

#by which I mean. the campaign will suddenly shift from railroad to sandbox #there is a purpose and reason for it. and actually I am saying this because I planned this much and then realized #there IS no way to railroad anything after that #it is impossible for me to plan ahead what the party will do with what they know at that point #so. embrace it. their world now #well. in however long it takes to get there #this has been a post #this is why im tryna build the whole world before we start #like I could just be vague about it and only define the parts we need as we need them #but even the supposedly railroaded bits. how can I predict where and how they’ll go off the tracks?#and like a better question is WHY did I decide to build a whole damn world instead of using something prewritten #and well. the answer is quite simple. and also twofold #a) I haven’t found a prewritten campaign that I want to run (that someone isn’t already running for me)#b) there’s a specific element of this world I want to explore that can’t be transposed into an existing setting #so. here I am. researching Roman agriculture #dnd

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rosicheeks · 6 months

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Unfortunately relatable. I grew up in the church and have a lot of Christian trauma from that. I show up for special occasions for my parents… sometimes. But it’s uncomfortable from the moment I step through the door. Bigoted pastor, the self-righteousness disguising the prejudice, the political comments from the altar. Shots at young people left right and center as if the hell on earth wasn’t caused by the same older generation 90% of the congregation belongs to..

I miss being young in the choir and the youth groups and not struggling with it. It’s wild to look back at the younger version of me who was unshakeable in his faith and honestly just saddening.

I was texting my sister today about it and she said

“I 100% think ALL of us have a ton of religious trauma and everyone else in the family just doesn’t realize it cause they’re still drinking the kool-aid.”

I ran out of tag room and didn’t want to delete any 😭 seriously not lying I could write a book about all my thoughts and experiences

#I relate to all of this so much #and it’s so sad how many people truly have religious trauma #I still find myself lucky and privileged cause I know there are stories MUCH worse than mine #it’s really hard cause my parents still think I’m a Christian #honestly at this point I have no clue what i am #even if I end up still being a Christian that doesn’t help or heal all of the years of church trauma #but the hard part is still acting the part for my parents #growing up I always tried to fit into the good Christian girl mold #cause I know that’s what my parents wanted and I didn’t want to disappoint them #but once I started smoking weed and they found out? it went all downhill from there #their perfect angel fell from heaven #and I feel like ever since I haven’t been really their daughter…. I’ve just been living on the outside looking in to everything #it hurts looking back at all the years I spent brainwashed into believing that was the ONLY faith #it genuinely makes me sick to my stomach thinking about the fact that I went to a pro life rally #the thing I was talking to my sister about was how mental health was never talked about in the church #when I started dealing with it and went to my parents or the pastors or any adult really and told them what I was dealing with #wanna know what the first thing they would ALWAYS say? well have you prayed about it? the way they treated mental illness was that it was #YOUR fault cause God is punishing you for something…. that you need to pray or go to church so then God will eventually take it away #and the thing is I don’t necessarily blame my parents (which kinda sucks cause I want to blame someone)#but honestly it’s just the environment they grew up in too… like I’m 99% sure my dad has dealt with depression his entire life #but won’t get diagnosed or anything cause they always believe faith has something to do with it #which makes me incredibly sad cause I just think about how much my dad has suffered and how he didn’t need to #^^ I was typing this out when I was late to my family gathering hahaha but then I think my sister called or something so I had to stop #sorry this post is all over the place - I swear I could write a book about religious trauma #yesterday went ok surprisingly but today? TODAY is going to be so much worse #sure I’ll make a post about it later but I guessssss I should go to bed now? it’s 2am and I have to get up at 5:45 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃#and I have a fuuuuull day of fun Christian festivities while I’m dealing with all of this bottled up and unresolved crap from my past #please don’t get me wrong I love my parents and like I said I don’t blame them - they did their best #it just really sucks wondering what my life would have been like if I didn’t grow up in the church or in a super religious family #I wonder if when I told my parents I was depressed if they would have instantly brought me in to get help

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fingertipsmp3 · 8 months

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I feel like I’ve lived through at least a month just in the past 3 days. I checked the date just now and damn near had an out of body experience when I realised Monday was only two days ago

#bro the absolute sodding emotional rollercoaster i have been through this past week should be studied by scientists #thursday: unsuccessful job interview. friday: found out that the job interview was unsuccessful. but one of the interviewers (actually a #former colleague of mine lol) gave me a piece of feedback that made me feel like i’d cracked the code for all future interviews #it was this: keep. talking. give as many details as humanly fucking possible. talk about policy. drop in words like safeguarding #list as many examples of stuff as you can. tell stories. bamboozle them #OH i forgot to even fucking mention we had builders at our house until friday. friday was the last day they woke me up with a cacophony #so the weekend was uneventful aside from there was a skip in the driveway and scaffolding all down the side of the house but zero men #monday: successful interview. found out it was successful 5 hours later. got off the phone having accepted the job…… and found a text from #my old boss (the boss i had at the job i really enjoyed. that old boss) inviting me to come back this summer #i had a bit of a mental breakdown but eventually decided to stick with the job i’d just got because it’s a permanent contract and they will #let me sit down #yesterday: found out that the foster doggy i applied for and really wanted is going to her forever home on thursday (which is now tomorrow)#obviously i love this for her but i was like ‘damn. okay’#today: the foster co-ordinator was like ‘hey do you want to foster this rambunctious 3 year old unneutered terrier?’#i was like ‘sure yeah what the fuck. that might as well happen’#(they are neutering him beforehand. and he looks really cute. he’s not aggressive he’s just a young terrier with like 3 brain cells)#unless something finally kills me in the meantime i’m picking him up on monday. i cancelled therapy in order to do this. yes i’m well aware #that there’s a metaphor somewhere in there but it’s fine. i rescheduled therapy #i also have realised i do not know how and when i’m going to get my ssri prescription renewed… i know the pharmacy will call me in a couple #of weeks to make sure i haven’t died. but i think i was supposed to get a prescription renewal at therapy #the therapy i won’t be going to until like 5 days after my prescription runs out. that therapy. foook #honestly withdrawal symptoms would probably just spice up the situation at this point. they’d just make things interesting #i swear to god everything always gets crazy and stupid right before my birthday… remember when i turned 26 and couldn’t drink because i #was on antibiotics for a kidney infection. and when i turned 27 and one of my wisdom teeth tried to emerge #this is like that except with dogs and jobs. at least the skip and the scaffolding are gone now #i AM trying to sell a sofa on facebook marketplace so wish me luck with that ig #personal

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strohller27 · 10 months

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“These are just choices. I can stop anytime I want,” says area man displaying pathologically addicted behaviour

#shhhhh it’s fine don’t worry about how much money I’m spending on these damn cards #I don’t even care about finding the super rare cards and I’ve found a few #and I still haven’t found Geno yet!!?! how the fuck tho?????#I have bought over 130 packs this is getting fucking ridiculous #are the odds of finding him just. that low???#tim horton’s hockey cards 2023-2024

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pepprs · 2 years

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also cringefail double vent posting over things that are not actually that big of a deal once again lol but i am so fucking miserable today in ways i don’t even know how to articulate. i need to move out. i know exactly where i want to live but they raised rent $300 and i can’t afford that but i want to live by myself so badly but my parents are adamant that i can’t bc i can’t drive and im a “diminutive inexperienced young woman” and i want to punch something. i read half of the drivers manual and cried reading it which is fucking stupid bc it s just the drivers manual. but i want to move out so bad. i hate sharing a room with my sister and im not getting the new room anymore bc we don’t have money to finish it up bc my mom is still sick and no one knows what’s wrong with her and she has to get all these tests. i never have a space i can go to that’s just quiet. i don’t want noise. i don’t want to block out noise with more noise. i want QUIET. i don’t want to be afraid to go into rooms or hear noises i don’t want to hear. and i don’t want to be living here for the three extra months it’ll take me to ng et my permit. im just done. i don’t want to live here!!! and things at work suck and are exhausting and draining and so unbearably overwhelming and i feel terribly lonely and disconnected from everyone and small and scared and i don’t have energy to fix any of it or explain what’s going on or ask for help or get a therapist or whatever. and i keep pulling muscles in my neck. and i want to go to sleep!!!!!!

#purrs #also 3 years ago today i found out i was getting sent home from brighton because of covid. FUCK covid. i am so lucky i haven’t gotten covid #and i hope i never ever get it but this pandemic truly ruined my life in some ways. why am i 24 sobbing hysterically over studying for a #test 15 year olds pass with ease. why am i terrified to step out into the world and do whatever. because being locked down for a fucking #year and a half made me lose hope over and over again until i couldn’t bear to have hope anymore that’s why. and now i guess i can again but #there’s nothing there to work with and part of me doesn’t want to work with anything anyway. i just am stuck in survival mode. i don’t want #to just survive. but every day is like being blasted with a firehose and im exhausted and overstimulated all the time and nothing feels #fully real and i just don’t have the energy to try to change things so i surrender to it or something. idk. it’s not like im the only person #experiencing that and that should help. but it doesn’t. im so angry about what this fucking nightmare pandemic stole from me and how i will #never recover from it or if i do it wont be for decades probably. and i can do things to fix it all right now but instead i want to be angry #delete later #also i probably will never feel comfortable being around even 1 person without an n95 mask even if covid goes away. which it won’t. so lol

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missiodine · 2 years

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#I’m nothing but existential dread right now #I feel absolutely sick and feel like life has no meaning #I hate myself so much. there’s plenty of good reasons to.#I’m not going to amount to anything. I’m not able to make friends. i feel like everyone will eventually leave me if they haven’t already.#I’m just a drain on everyone. I take up space #not even cutting feels good anymore #I don’t even know who I am at this point.#I get the feeling everyone hates me or at the very least doesn’t like me. which is probably the right opinion to have anyway.#I’ve always found my body broken and disgusting #I sleep all the time these days and I don’t want to wake up anymore #I write a suicide note every fucking month for when I catch the bus. I don’t know why I haven’t done it already.#I know how I wanna do it. that’s all simple. I just don’t know why I can’t muster up the courage to follow through #vent

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tragedykery · 2 years

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girl help I’m having Feelings about my own ocs

#hira & taituk… sita & hira….. yeah…….#elli rambles #just wrote a little bit (have written surprisingly little compared to how much scenes are in my head) and God…#girls when characters and situations and arcs and relationships #oc tag #also. nishaluq first meeting #haven’t decided Exactly how they meet and where yet but whatever the case it features a homoerotic fight #not even homoerotic in a quiet longing ‘shit I’m getting distracted during a fight bc of their looks’ way but in an openly checking #each other out & flirting & making innuendos while they fight (sometimes from the distance sometimes while literally having a knife pressed #against the other’s throat) way. they’re brash and brazen and not actually serious about killing each other (that would be such a shame)#but it’s fun to fight like this. neither of them have found an even match in ages and well. if that goes paired with a little flirting #they’re not one to complain.#I love my fictional dykes <333 #ok whatever gonna put this in my #nishaluq #tag #the birates #oc rambles

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forerussake · 2 years

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it’s an interesting realization to have, that you are no longer your best friend’s “best friend”, bc they have since moved on in their life and have made new friends, but to you they are still your “best friend”, bc you haven’t really.

#it doesn’t help that i have an apparently very skewed idea of what exactly constitutes a friendship #bc in the past two months there have been two separate people who i would call more sth like #acquaintances that i get along with better than others #who have told me on separate occasions that they have enjoyed my company #and one of them even let me know i could text to hang out over the break (which i haven’t done yet and i really should i think)#but in each instance i was so surprised bc i hadn’t realized we were at that level of knowing each other yet????#anyway making friends is fucking hard and i honestly don’t know how to do it #most friendships i’ve had over the years were relationships that i sort of half was dragged half fell into #and i’ve always found friendships stressful #anyway anyway i’ve been slowly developing the above realization over the past months and i’m not sure how i feel #rl

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maiteo · 12 days

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MCTOMINAY scoring…blaming your list sorry I didn’t forget

#answered #AHSJSJSKS FUCK😭#no it needs to be studied how the players I give a lil attention to or just eye a LITTLE bit end of putting out motm performances…study it!!#no like…the list my dms….yeah I’ll take the blame for this one #meu amor Diogo…meu rei….he needs to get behind me meu deus #haven’t even found a stream to watch this shit yet but I’m blaming the goal on the fact that bumnardo is captain!

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fingertipsmp3 · 9 months

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I’m not sure if the seasonal depression is hitting especially hard this year or if I’m just grieving for Mabel or if I’m finally going irreparably insane or if life/people is being unfair towards me or all of the above

#i cry super hard every day now. sometimes multiple times a day #sometimes something sets it off specifically (like arguing with my mom earlier)#but sometimes i just think about mabel too much and start sobbing #i thought i was okay. i mean i knew i wasn’t okay but i knew time would do its thing #the first few weeks were the worst but earlier this month i felt like i’d kind of plateau’d #like i was still sad but i could look at photos and videos and talk about her without crying. i was even laughing #now… now i can’t even think of her. again #it just feels so fucking unfair that i’ll NEVER see her again. like what the fuck do you mean. what do you MEAN #what do you mean i have to live out my whole life… god knows how fucking long i’ll live; and N E V E R see her again. shut the fuck up.#that’s so fucking unfair. and everyone else is okay. i’m like how can you POSSIBLY just go about your life #the best dog in the world is dead and she’s going to stay dead and i won’t see her again for however many fucking stupid cursed decades #i live and i might not even see her when i die. how the HELL am i supposed to be okay with that. is that a joke #and there’s a part of me that’s like ‘maybe i could adopt another dog’ but i don’t know #i think i’d feel better and worse at the same time. i wouldn’t feel so alone but they wouldn’t be mabel #i put in an application for a terrier that’s at a local rescue but if i don’t get him i’m not trying again. i’ll take it as a hint #cats aren’t an option btw i found out i’m allergic. which was brand new information.. i’ve been around cats that didn’t set my allergies #off at all. but i guess there’s a difference between spending an hour at your friend’s house who has one cat #and living 24/7 with a cat that gets fur and dander and saliva everywhere #and i don’t think other pets would suit me. i just don’t feel comfortable caring for any animal i haven’t done research on #i had hamsters when i was a teenager but… tbh never again. they are so much fun but i have anxiety dreams about them now #so it’s dogs (well.. one dog) or nothing #i do have plans to speak to my doctor about my depression btw because i genuinely find this unsustainable #like i do think it’s situational (seasonal/grief/everyone around me seeming to want to argue with me lately) but i still need #mood stabilisers while i’m in this situation lol #personal

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