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hi and happy march! i hope everyone is doing well. a couple tiny updates:

i still haven’t remade, created a substack / tinyletter or whatever, etc. and once again i don’t know if i will or actually want to. for right now im actually kinda leaning against it; maybe just poking in here and saying hi on the first day of every month is enough! (though i don’t want to promise that i’ll make this a regular thing — maybe fully cutting myself off from social media is truly what i need to do and will do eventually — but im finding that opening the apps once every few days and then doing a tiny monthly update on here does feel like a healthily constrained yet enjoyable thjng to do rn. so maybe i will lean into that for as long as it feels good to.)

february was an unexpectedly hard and hectic month for me: scary health issues (i had to go to the er 🤪 i think im ok or at least will be soon but there are still some unknowns to figure out in the weeks ahead) and some intense work stuff. and / but… I HAVE MOVED OUT!!!!!!!! my apartment is a half-unpacked disaster and i am dealing with some absolutely brutal emotional backdraft from the whole experience lol but i feel so so so gratified and thankful to finally be in a situation where, for the first time in my life, i can truly begin to genuinely, stably, sustainably recover and thrive. it’s going to be a long journey with some pain and discomfort along the way, but i know it’ll be worth it 🥹 maybe i’ll find a healthy way to let you know how it goes!

i hope you’re all doing as well as you can be! im manifesting a marvelous march for my many magical mutuals 💗🫂🪄☕️🐈

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hi everyone! i hope january has been kind to you and that february will be even kinder. just a few quick updates:

i haven’t remade yet and honestly im thinking that i’m not going to (so if you reached out for my new url please know im not ignoring you!). ive opened the app and lurked a little from time to time but honestly not posting / generally staying away from tumblr and other social media has definitely made a noticeable difference w my mental health. i am still very much struggling w depression but spending majority of my time touching grass has genuinely helped a lot 🥲 i still have a LOT of recovery to do but ithink im in a much better place now than i was when i made that post last month and im (nervously) hopeful that i’ll never be in a headspace that dark again. as much as i miss it here and am sad to not be as in touch w my mutuals anymore, i really think it’s the best choice for me right now. but im still “here” and i may drop in from time to time to say hi just like im doing rn!

also i have a VERY exciting update i want to share: im finally moving out!!!!!!! into my own apartment!!!!!! in less than a month!!!!!!!!! im SO excited and scared and stressed and relieved and proud of myself. and even though im stepping away from tumblr for the foreseeable future and took this huge step without talking about it here, i truly couldn’t have done this w/o all of the encouragement and comfort so many of you have given me over the years when i needed it most. it feels overdramatic / cringe / etc to say in part bc it was an unhealthy coping mechanism for me to share it all and seek relief in the way i did, but im truly so grateful to everyone who has borne witness to the some of the hardest and most formative moments along my journey. it hasn’t been an easy path at all but it has really, truly eased the hardship of it to know im not alone and there are ppl who have been through / are going through similar things. thank you for helping to light my way 💗 im considering starting a tinyletter / substack / etc (basically an email newsletter / blog) focused on what i will (hopefully) be learning and discovering as i build this new life for myself, so if you’re interested in that please send me an ask! again, im not sure if im actually going to do it… but just like w potentially making a new tumblr someday, i’ll send a link to anyone who’s interested if and when i do decide to go for it 🥹

that’s all for now! im wishing each of you a fabulous february 🫂❣️🐈☕️

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Me..

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ive tried to write this post like 15 times in the last couple days and im just going to stop trying to word everything perfectly and whatever will come out will come out. i have been doing extremely badly depression wise lately (i am not in danger of doing anything to hurt myself and i have access to resources that can help me but i am. very not good right now) and took a break from social media to try to process and recuperate. i haven’t recovered yet but i did decide that i need to step away from using this blog and being on social media generally. at some point in the next few weeks im planning to make a new blog that i intend to use in healthier ways. if you’re interested in following me there please send me an ask and i’ll reach out to you with the url once im ready (it might take a while!). (no pressure to stick around / refollow if you don’t want to though!) i might end up deleting this blog or leaving tumblr altogether depending on what happens, and if i do either of those things i’ll try to let everyone know beforehand.

thanks for reading! happy new year 🫂💗

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right now on earth there’s a kindly old stray tomcat who just got adopted and he’s receiving enough food to fill his belly for the first time in his entire life and he’s so so so happy and he doesn’t even know that it’s going to be like this forever :)

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We’d be mutuals in every lifetime

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big fan of when emotions are converted into magic

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obsessed with this genre of images

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hi physically disabled black woman here would anyone like to help me i have a fucking dollar

i need money for painkillers and food you know how it is uhuhhhh huhhh lalala

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hi everything sucks and is so expensive and i am Scared (16.11.23)

hi im remaking my post because im still struggling and donations have stalled.

i just lost my job recently that allowed me to actually live a semi okay lifestyle and my new job pays way less and gives me way less hours (im talking like 5 hours a week currently) and i havent heard back from any of my other applications.

im really, really struggling right now as my employment plans fell through and i dont have any support with this. im struggling really bad with debt ive had to take on to pay for food, transport, medication, medical appointments, and new work clothes (my new workplace has a simpler uniform but a uniform nonetheless)

ive been hospitalized multiple times in the past few months which have also cost me significant amounts of money and energy. my therapist has quit, i cannot find new healthcare providers, and i am in absolute shambles trying to find a workplace that will give me enough hours to survive while also not physically trying to murder my chronically ill ass

centrelink is not helping me right now, and im pretty fucked, and freaking the fuck out a little, and i really really need some help. if youre willing and able to help out a disabled indigenous transbi person trying to actually function and survive til i get my next job. like please.

i draw if anyones interested in any of that and i can try and do sketches in appreciation for donations but its just. a bit of a dire fucking sitch tbh

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whatever (continues reblogging)

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Beryl and Ivy's Recovery and Replen Fund

12/1

reposting for the new month and testing to see if this actually posts:

we are still in need of help!!! my wife is going to need support with transportation to and from classes/work, and i am going to need help covering the rest of our expenses until more money comes in (direct contributions help, as does support on ko-fi and patreon) . we mainly need help with getting stuff off our registry (which you can find here), especially things marked most wanted. thanks so much for reblogging+your support!

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waving is so cute. literally hi

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soemthing about the 🫂 emoji is so viscerally warm to me. despite its blue color pallete. you can feel the warmth radiating off of it. the love. the care. this is the closest to a hug anything virtually simulating it has ever made me feel tbh

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has anyone seen my sharp rock? i left it in the river for 100 years for safe keeping and now i can't find it. its many uneven edges have sentimental significance