#i don't really know what this is something about perceiving and being perceived

[claudiafrankie]

Pick a Card: Your Forecast for Pluto in Aquarius

Disclaimer: Tarot is not an evidence-based practice. You are in charge of making your own decisions.

Pile 1: The Ring

Hey pile 1 lets get into it!

For you guys, your Pluto in Aquarius transit is going to be marked by a significant relationship. Your tarot cards are the Nine of Swords, Justice, and The Lovers. You picked The Ring oracle card and then your other oracle card was Relationship lmao. Almost every card here screams 'relationship.'

The Nine of Swords is the first card out. I think if you want this relationship to grow and really give it a shot, you're going to have to confront some pretty gnarly subconscious material. If you're into astrology you know that this is very Pluto lol.

I think connecting with this person is going to be tough at first. You honestly might start out with this person like "bro i hate this bitch" hahahaha but then as time moves on both of your defenses start to come down and you begin to actually get to know each other. This feels beautiful and, maybe most importantly, not rushed. Each of you is fascinated by the other and there is mutual respect, neither wants to jump in too quickly or make the other uncomfortable. Each time you learn something new about them you form more connections in your mind about the kind of person that they are, and they experience the same thing. You both like the unfolding image of the person in front of you, theres just a genuine connection between you two. It feels like you both recognize each other in a way that is like "huh. you just kinda get it, dont you?"

Yeah it just feels very matter-of-fact. Like "oh. it's you. i found you" and then like big stupid grin.

I think there could be some weighty, earthy things that hinder the growth of this connection in the beginning. They could be in a relationship that is not right for them and coming to terms with that, or you are in a relationship that doesn't suit you. Honestly both of you could be seeing other people at the time you meet or begin getting to know them. I think this is part of the anxiety and difficulty going on in the relationship. I think something about the two of you being together would cause people to talk, and one or both of you is/are clinging to the old way of being perceived.

I think you will have to be really patient with this person if you want it to work. If they are in a relationship that they want to leave, I don't think they will be making any hasty decisions about leaving or staying with that person. And they shouldn't. I think you know that if this person is going to leave someone, it has to be their decision. You understand that trying to force anything with this person will not work, and would actually probably have the opposite of the desired effect.

Of course, this doesn't make things easy on you. And it's also not necessarily fair for you to wait around. This person understands that. They don't want to lose you, and would be upset if you moved on, but they also are mature enough to realize that they can't stop you from doing so if that's what you want to do.

Ugh this is so hard pile 1. It's like both of you feel the connection, but the things preventing you guys being together are not frivolous by any means. They are very real, weighty obstacles.

If you look at the progression from the Nine of Swords, Justice, and then The Lovers, it looks like a person starting from a place of extreme fear, facing their fear head-on through unavoidable karma, and then through this meeting a divine partner.

To clarify the 9OS I pulled the chariot. I think what you're really afraid of is taking control of your destiny. I think you're scared to take the reigns in your own life and have been subconsciously seeking a partner to do this for you. Maybe this is what this significant person is coming into your life to show you: how to take charge without being tyrannical, how to assert your autonomy. I think that this person is on the other end of the spectrum as you. They are the type to struggle relinquishing control and have to manage everything around them to feel safe and to feel like they are enough. I think they are going to show you how much power you truly have. I think they see a potential in you that even you can't. And I think that you are going to show them that they don't have to do so much to be worthy of love and affection. That they are safe to open up and be a kid again. That being stingy with their affection actually holds them back in some ways.

Pile 2: The Lily

Pile number two these are some good digs ya got in the cards let me tell you.

Pluto moving through Aquarius is going to entail you rediscovering your own innocence and protecting it at any cost. You are allowing yourself to be a student and start at ground zero, unafraid to jump into new interests, accepting of the fumbling and mistakes that will inevitably occur.

I think for a very, very long time you have been keeping yourself from the world, afraid to advertise your talents because you have been made to feel that by doing so you are being egotistical, showy, and generally just full of yourself. You have experienced some key moments and events in your life where, maybe as a kid or teenager or somewhere in there, when you were just doing your own thing and immersed in your own world creating, people made comments that made you get in your head. These people could see how much love and creativity you radiate and how much talent you had inherently and they were threatened by it.

Say you're a kid or a preteen and you're hanging out in your room, minding your business. Maybe you have some music on and are dancing, or working on a drawing or painting. Maybe you're just enjoying looking out the fucking window. These are the kinds of people that will knock and then immediately open the door, not waiting for your permission to enter, take in what you have going on, and make you feel small for it. They couldn't stand you having fun on your own, taking care of yourself, emotionally fulfilling your own needs. They had to have you at their mercy emotionally to feel good about themselves.

I think you're sense of self really got fucked with when you were young pile 2. You we're made to feel guilty for normal coming-of-age things. Maybe you were taught that your sexuality is something to hide and be ashamed of and you still carry this with you. When you we're doing well it was not noticed or actively shot down, it was just never enough or you never got it quite right. The target was always moving and you're seeing now that it was never about you hitting a target or meeting a standard, it was the getting you to dance that they wanted.

The lily oracle card says this: "Need for an explanation of feelings. Chastity." Your clarifying oracle card is potential. And what's interesting is that on the Potential oracle card there is a field of grass with long blades of grass braiding and twisting together in thick strands, growing up into something we don't know yet. I am also noticing how the lilies in the picture on the oracle card you chose are picked flowers. You have been surrounded by energies that had to possess you. You know that saying about how if you love a flower you'll leave it so it can keep growing? Your soul has suffered so much because you have been dealing with people that won't let you see how beautiful you really are. They kind of hid you from the world.

But now, all this thick grass is growing like crazy. You're starting to lean into your gifts and use them. I wouldn't be surprised if you're working on something in private so you can avoid nit-picky eyes. Maybe you're working on your body and health, and your beauty is increasing. Maybe you're finding more ways to make money using your gifts. I think whatever things you have in the works pile 2, you're either already are or will be getting noticed for your transformation.

Your tarot cards are the Seven of Wands, Page of Pentacles, and The Emperor. Yeah you're pissed. You've gone back and forth in your mind like "maybe it really is me and there's something wrong with me." but now you're finding a really amazing balance between recognizing your flaws and looking at yourself objectively without shaming yourself. You're tired of looking at yourself as sub-human, even though you know looking at yourself in a higher light means that some people around you might not be so happy because they can't get what they want from you anymore.

You are a warrior and tough as nails, and you're a precious child all wrapped into one pile 2. Your inner child and inner teenager are integrating I think. You listen to them and don't shut them down like you have been conditioned to for so long.

Aaaah I love this pile 2. It's going to be a long journey, and you're going to become so much more you.

PIle 3: Little Girl

Pile 3 okaaaaayy less go

The first message that wants to come through for the folks that picked this pile is that you are so so protected. It's like your soul has protection from both light energy and dark. I think you are like the woman in the strength card - with a soft touch you hold power over more visceral, carnal energies and tendencies in others and yourself. You know that trope of a child who, in all their innocence and purity, loves even the ugliest creatures and sees the goodness that exists even in those who cause harm? That's y'all to a T. And I think because of this you have beings in this life that are indebted to you and protecting your well being.

I think you are going to be confronted by options in love and relationships that are showing up to test your discernment. While it's noble and a beautiful thing to see the good in all people, you have been relying on this emotionally giving part of yourself for a really long time. Emotionally you have reached master-level, and you extend almost limitless grace to people around you. Pluto is going to ask you: where is this coming from? What are your intentions behind your kindness? Is this genuine care and affection that you're giving away? Is it an arm to hold people at a distance? Is it a tactic to get what you want? Why does considering these possibilities trigger you so intensely? Why do you think it's so terrible to make mistakes and do bad things sometimes? Why do you feel like it's your job to make everyone feel good? Why do you let that burden you? How long have you been carrying that for? Why do you think you're so important that you're responsible for a burden like that? Why do you feel like you're such an awful person? Why do you feel unique in your terribleness? Alone in it?

This Pluto transit is going to bring you to your knees and it's going to be (not to sound weird) ecstasy. One time I heard someone describe the Three of Swords as a card of euphoria. It's cathartic. Experiencing such intense pain, getting hit right where you have the smallest hole in your armor and are so raw and vulnerable. It's like how in French the word orgasm means "little death." But you also find out that the anticipation was so much worse than the actual pain, or, if it catches you by surprise, you are pleasantly surprised with your ability to think on your feet and take care of yourself.

This feels so emo and intense lol and I think it's going to be so super healing for your inner teenager especially. You're going have really intense emotional highs and lows that show you how deep and dark and cunning and evil you can get as well as how luminescent and clear and bright and good you can be. And then you're going to come out the other side like "damn. I am both of these things and neither of them and also have the maturity to not take any of it too seriously and still maintain a chill, laid back warm vibe." Pile 2 you're going to become unstoppable this Pluto transit. truly. If you think you're powerful now you have no idea.

You're going to get deeeeeep into your shame that is buried and hang out with it. You're going to watch movies with it, get to know it, have drinks with it. Talk to it and understand what it's been trying to tell you for so long. Understand why it makes you act the way that it does. Let it explain to you why they have let certain people in and why they have pushed others away or let them get away. It's getting over disgust you have over parts of yourself and realizing that "oh... you're actually kind of cool" haha. And then you're inviting all these repressed parts of yourself to a party you host with the other parts of yourself that you have been conditioned to like and accept and everyone is going to meet each other and decide that "damn lowkey we could probably take over the world if we wanted to."

TLDR pile 3, you're going to be integrating heavily while Pluto is in Aquarius. It's going to be uncomfortable and delicious, boring and riveting. Enjoy.

[ko-existing]

hello, how does it make sense to use the analogy of a tree falling but you’re not there to hear it means it didnt really happen? doesn’t that mean that it’s separate from you because u weren’t there but it happened anyway? like let’s say a building was set on fire but i didn’t know about it, doesn’t that mean that somebody separate from me experienced it and i didn’t? differences in experience?

What it means is in order for you to know if a tree truly made a sound when it fell is for you to be aware of the sound

Even if I told you about me hiking and a tree falling and it made a very dull sound, it's still within the "awareness" or "knowing" of X telling you about it. Otherwise, there's no such thing.

Anything and everything that is perceived has to be within "awareness" of it.

You can't turn awareness off, it's permanent and I know someone is going to be like "well when I'm asleep I'm not aware" ask yourself: "How did I come to that conclusion?"

To say you're not aware, you need to know that "this moment i'm not aware " which makes you aware.

-> prior to anything

You don't have to focus on the tree, you can use any example. In order for you to know what is written here, you have to be aware of the words otherwise, you have no idea what's even going on and if you dissect it all, you'll come to the same conclusion, that you cannot separate "Awareness/Knowing" of something from the happening of "something".

You can use the example of a "dream". You're aware of whatever the content is. If "you're not", it is not happening now. You can't know something without being aware of it.

Any "experience" needs "Awareness", but "Awareness" does not need experiences.

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.189 Correction

When story time ended, Sophia took Desi to the bathroom and washed away the mess. With a few moments to myself, I went to the real estate website to see our house again and choose which side we'll call home. Both houses have an identical layout, so it really boiled down to which furniture we liked more. The gray house had a more sophisticated vibe, while the blue house was more relaxed and comfortable. Choosing was a lot harder than I imagined because they both were nice, and I couldn't go wrong with either. Ultimately, however, I chose the gray one. I figured since I'm taking on all the risk, it's only right we live in the fancier one. Just as I picked up the phone to call Less and tell her we have a house, someone knocked at the front door. It was Dub! I let him in and told him I was just thinking of him yesterday. Usually he'd take the opportunity to joke about how he has that effect on sims, but he just kinda snorted and said it was funny in the driest of tones. There was nothing funny about that half-hearted laugh and him standing in the foyer staring into the corner. Something was wrong.

"Earth to Dubstep. You coming in or you gonna stand in the foyer all night?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm good."

He definitely was not good because he didn't even flinch at the mention of the nickname he hates so much. Whatever's got him in a funk is probably why he's here. He always comes to me when he's in crisis. Well, when he perceives he's in crisis, rather. I love the guy, but he's a little high-strung sometimes. I'm glad he has sims in his life like Maia and me who are much calmer and more level-headed to keep him straight.

I didn't want to just dive in and spook him, though, so I started with a little small talk.

"Happy belated," I said.

"Thanks, man," he replied with a tiny grin.

"How did Tami like sharing her day with you?"

He let out a very long sigh, and I knew I had stepped unintentionally right into the middle of what I tried to dance around. I guess we're going all the way in.

"She didn't."

"Oh."

"How do you-" He stopped himself and turned away from me. "Nevermind. You wouldn't understand."

"Understand what?"

He swatted at me, trying to sweep the conversation back under the rug.

"Nothing. You have the perfect child and all this wisdom. You don't understand what it's like for the rest of us."

Was he mocking me? I've had it up to here with everyone assuming I live this perfect life and have all the answers. I'm one of the most down-to-earth sims I know, yet somehow I still end up being out of touch with everyone. Am I too confident? Too strong? I know I've carried things I shouldn't have in the past, and I need to be more open, but how does that equate to me having it all together? I know Dub is upset about something and isn't thinking straight, so I'm gonna try to let it go this time, but not before I give him a little dose of truth because, upset or not, this fairytale everyone thinks I live in ends today.

"Do you really believe that?" I asked.

He shrugged.

"Maybe. I don't know. But I'm sure you're gonna tell me how I'm wrong, so..."

"Damn right I am. You don't know my life like you think you do. And you definitely don't know what goes on in my head. 'All this wisdom?' I got it from all the shit and mental gymnastics I've been through. Now, I'll be the first to say my child is the best, but she has her moments too. And I've had my share of parenting and marriage fails, so don't tell me I don't know what it's like."

He sat silently for a few moments, taking in my reprove. Part of me thinks all he needed was to hear me say he's not alone, but another part thinks he still needs advice on something, so I got down to business.

"What happened, Dub? I don't like seeing you like this."

"I'm sorry. I don't know why I said that."

"Don't worry about it. What's going on?"

"You ever wonder if you're ruining Desi?"

His question caught me off guard, and I laughed. He has no idea how obvious that answer should be.

"Only all the time," I said.

His eyes lit up.

"Really?"

"Of course. Did Tami come with a manual? Because we sure didn't get one. I don't know what I'm doing half the time, man, so yeah...I wonder. Like, her birthday is in two days, but I'm still carrying her around like an infant. She enjoys it, so it's cool, but is it hurting her? Will she want to be up under us all the time when she's older? Am I keeping her from becoming independent? I question every move I make with her, even if it's not necessarily bad."

"I feel that." He sat there, nodding over and over as if to drum up the courage to make his next statement. "Tami has been doing and saying some mean things lately, but I just let it happen because of my own feelings about the sims she's doing it to."

"How do you mean?"

"I told you she kicked my former tenants. You know they deserved that. She also bit my father-in-law. I was so proud of her because someone needs to knock him down a few pegs. But she's older now and using words. She cut up this little girl in the park yesterday and told her she wasn't pretty."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah. But the other girl started it, so she had it coming too."

"I see what you mean now."

"So, what do you think about it?"

Oof. Why does he always put me in this position? I have a lot of feelings about this, but I'm sure none of them are what he wants to hear. But what kind of friend would I be if I said nothing? I'd feel terrible if Tami grew up to be a monster, knowing I had the opportunity to shed some light early on. It won't be comfortable, but I've got to at least try. Here goes nothing.

"I think ... You're my boy, and I'll always tell you the truth, so ... You're her dad, Dub. You should be the one telling her those things are wrong, not encouraging her bad behavior. I know you think all those folks got what they deserved, which is also problematic, but is that the message you want to send Tami? That she can do and say whatever she wants and get away with it because 'they deserved it?' I'm afraid of the path you're putting her on. What kind of a woman will she become if you let her continue on like this? Do you think of her future?"

"Of course I do! What kind of a-"

He paused, succumbing to the realization I was right, even though I wondered if I had gone too far.

"I'm sorry if I'm out of line," I said. "I wouldn't have said anything if I didn't care."

"No. You're right. You always are. I was just thinking about what my parents will say if they find out how she's been acting. There's no way in hell they would have let me get away with the stuff I let slide."

I can't imagine my parents letting us get away with that either, but I honestly don't know what they would have done. Me and Less never really got into trouble, and my parents were both so lenient. I guess I'll never know. Hopefully, I'll never have to talk to Desi about this.

"I'm glad you always keep it 100 with me," he continued. "That's why I trust you so much. Can't lie, though. That hurt, but I know I needed to hear it. Deep down, I knew, but I never saw it like that. I'll do better, though. Believe that."

"I believe it, man. We don't play about our daughters."

"We absolutely do not!"

Not that I don't love these deep conversations with my best friend, but that one got really heavy, and he clearly has a lot to mull over later, so I pulled out my phone and showed him our new home, hoping a lighter topic would do the trick.

[chickenstrangers]

ONLY FRIENDS | EP. 3 | NICK

I’ve been listenin' to birds cry I've been viewin’ from a bird's eye

[captain-astors]

Creature. (The rendered ones are referenced from manga panels)

[spywhitney]

How I sleep knowing I'll never trust anyone that hates Sydney but worships Richie:

[radio-and-the-dirt]

dude i don't really care if people ship aroace characters just please acknowledge that they're aro and/or ace. like,, aro and ace people still can and do enter into relationships of various types at times and not every aro or ace person completely lacks attraction anyway and some date even if they do, so like, ship them if thats what you want but please just be respectful.

just acknowledge that the character is aro and/or ace. do some research about what that might mean for them if you need to. treat those characters in a way that respects their identities and doesn't completely brush them aside.

im just tired. we can be in relationships. we can not be in relationships. we are still aros and aces. dont try and erase what little representation we get.

i would like to note that i see things in this way because i have never seen a 'professional' writer (like non-fanfic or not a small online creator) specify where an aro/ace character sits on those spectrums or how they actually view relationships of any type. i've also never seen any 'professional' writer's characters get to explore or express that part of themselves enough in their stories to give much better an understanding than just "not really interested in sex or romance".

if a more specific understanding of a character was provided and it meant that that character wouldn't be involved in romantic and/or sexual relationships or was repulsed by them than yeah, I wouldn't want people shipping them at all but i dont think i've ever seen that so thats not what this is about.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

also if only the physical copy of how to disappear completely & never be found i first encountered & read a few years ago (sort of [roughly avg age ten] reader book, not any similarly titled How To) hadn't disappeared completely & not been found since, probably b/c i put it somewhere i intended to be For Safekeeping, which is also how my binder vanished....b/c it's one of those like. those book for late elementary/middle school readers when they just weave in this unrealism which makes for a delightful range & unpredicability? and with a cynical protagonist girl like off to the races like wow her mom is depressed asf & smoking? and it's about A Family History Secrets Mystery so blatantly a haunting that the inciting incident is basically introducing a haunted [family history secrets mystery] house. and spoilers don't matter like it's stemming from there being this missing uncle who grew up so in contrast to the Winsome Winning Sibling Who Does It All Right while seeing his own affiliation with rats that he tried to disappear completely & never be found which led to this Tragedy which led to this more unintended disappearance of his & he haunts this house & wants to be left alone & only goes out at night with this [ambiguous Is That A Giant Rat Or Weird Small Dog (protagonist affected by these family situations who expresses her preoccupation with an awareness of how fate can Strike and Get you with this interest with roving packs of killer chihuahuas. people think she's weird though she spontaneously befriends this other girl struck with this bolt from the blue & a bit weird / outcast & then Insightful who i wish was in it more)] & plays into the hauntedness danger like playing into the [something's Wrong with you then] until having to take yet more action where the urge to express the truth comes out more both b/c living that hidden is more threatened but also b/c now the niece children are more threatened as well. ft. a sort of preternatural blurring of time b/c of only being communicated with through this uncle via his comic pages (that he paints?) of dubiously accurate translations of irl events that are created so quickly it seems to verge on foresight, imagine like "hmm what's this painting. it's me standing in this room looking at this painting??? as someone ominous lurks in the shadows right behind me?" in both [now how could you know this & paint it really fast ahead of time] and [horror]

[wolpatinga]

[vulpinesaint]

my problematic gender truth is that i actually feel no attachment to either of the two binary gender constructs. it just like. makes no sense to me. i've got my own unrelated thing going on. but in the absence of connection to either choice i really do find it more convenient to cosplay closer to the one that people treat like a human being

[leatherbookmark]

hopping around different blogs is fun.

a post on blog 1: i find it a little weird that -- don't get me wrong, the barbie movie looks great with all the doll-like details, i bet the actors had great fun and i'd like to see it myself, but -- people are getting excited about marketing of this movie. they're acting as though mattel's 3985* deals with 837* different companies are something new, exciting and creative instead of... 3985 deals with 837 companies spanning many different areas! this movie is a commercial for a doll! isn't this kinda weird?

*numbers made up

a post on blog 2: i don't think any sane adult doesn't realize that this is a toy commercial! it's rather obvious.

a post on blog 3: boo hoo 'the barbie movie is capitalist propaganda' i don't give a SHIT marx won't fuck you. did you do this for transformers too? do you think only stupid girls who like pink need the reminder?

like, oooooh! things are happening!

[quietwingsinthesky]

The tags on your rb about it being hard for a Sam/Nick/Lucifer shipper is edging me

😔 trust me I am also suffering. I outlined it back in October, wrote about 40%, and then got distracted. If it makes you feel better, it’s nothing special, just some self-indulgent smutty worship.

I have a snippet? Just set the scene with Sam!Lucifer and Nick in a grand old church with some pretty stained glass windows picturing the Apocalypse that Lucifer is putting together.

There are a few more windows. No more battles, no more death. The flourishing of nature, the beginning of the reclaim of cities by wildlife, and always Lucifer alone in them. Alone. With Sam. Sam can fill the abandoned parts of her grace better than Nick could.

“What do you think?” She asks when he has seen them all. 

“It’s beautiful,” he answers, honestly. He looks out at the empty pews that lead up to where they stand. “But who is it for?” He can’t imagine She would build something like this for demons to sit and worship Her in, not when She despised them so heavily. But a church must have a congregation. A God must have a devotee. Lucifer steps up behind him.

“For you,” She whispers in his ear. “For us.”

[trans-leek-cookie]

im going to kill myself a million times. Why do I still see ppl acting like "ace people who enjoy sex? That's not what ace means!" Like maybe you're right idgaf but I feel like ppl do not understand or acknowledge that The physical sensation of stimulation that sex produces is obviously connected to but not inherently attached to sexual attraction.

Actually I'm going to go further and talk about the fact Sexual assault is one example of something involving sexual interaction that doesn't require attraction. Like attraction can be a factor I'm not saying it's never an element but it is not INHERENT to ASSAULT. And I think the idea that sex = attraction is not accurate and needs to be acknowledged bc of it. Also note ace people can sexually assault and/or harass people because 'sexual' actions are not only tied to attraction. And on the flip side: people can be "aroused" by sexual assault bc of the physical stimulation and that doesn't say shit about their sexuality. It's a physical response.

Like I don't really give a shit Abt if ace people can like sex or if ppl who like sex can't be ace or whatever but the implications of these discussions make me want to hurt myself and others

Also sex repulsed =/= asexual because people can experience sexual attraction and still have problems with sex. For example: people who struggle with accepting their sexuality and unlearning/uninternalizing societal bigotry like homophobia and transphobia may be repulsed by sex. Sexual assault survivors may still experience sexual attraction but be repulsed by sex. and sexual repulsion can be permanent or temporary based on the person.

And I'm almost sure unless I've been misinformed by a lot of ppl: hypersexuality is not incompatible with asexuality. From my understanding, hypersexuality is not a measure of "how sexual" someone is, it's closer to an OCD obsession focused on sex, where people can have intrusive thoughts that are sexual, or assume they need to provide for someone sexually to be "of worth" + is often a trauma response rather than a reflectiom of attraction or desire

[tearlessrain]

please help me- i used to be pretty smart but i’m having so much trouble grasping the concept of diegetic vs non-diegetic bdsm!

gfkjldghfd okay first of all I'm sorry for the confusion, if you're not finding anything on the phrase it's because I made it up and absolutely nobody but me ever uses it, but I haven't found a better way to express what I'm trying to say so I keep using it. but now you've given me an excuse to ramble on about some shit that is only relevant to me and my deeply inefficient way of talking and by god I'm going to take it.

SO. the way diegetic and non-diegetic are normally used is to talk about music and sound design in movies/tv shows. in case you aren't familiar with that concept, here's a rundown:

diegetic sound is sound that happens within the world of the movie/show and can be acknowledged by the characters, like a song playing on the stereo during a driving scene, or sung on stage in Phantom of the Opera. it's also most other sounds that happen in a movie, like the sounds of traffic in a city scene, or a thunderclap, or a marching band passing by. or one of the three stock horse sounds they use in every movie with a horse in it even though horses don't really vocalize much in real life, but that's beside the point, the horse is supposed to be actually making that noise within the movie's world and the characters can hear it whinnying.

non-diegetic sound is any sound that doesn't exist in the world of the movie/show and can't be perceived by the characters. this includes things like laugh tracks and most soundtrack music. when Duel of Fates plays in Star Wars during the lightsaber fight for dramatic effect, that's non-diegetic. it exists to the audience, but the characters don't know their fight is being backed by sick ass music and, sadly, can't hear it.

the lines can get blurry between the two, you've probably seen the film trope where the clearly non-diegetic music in the title sequence fades out to the same music, now diegetic and playing from the character's car stereo. and then there are things like Phantom of the Opera as mentioned above, where the soundtrack is also part of the plot, but Phantom of the Opera does also have segments of non-diegetic music: the Phantom probably does not have an entire orchestra and some guy with an electric guitar hiding down in his sewer just waiting for someone to break into song, but both of those show up in the songs they sing down there.

now, on to how I apply this to bdsm in fiction.

if I'm referring to diegetic bdsm what I mean is that the bdsm is acknowledged for what it is in-world. the characters themselves are roleplaying whatever scenarios their scenes involve and are operating with knowledge of real life rules/safety practices. if there's cnc depicted, it will be apparent at some point, usually right away, that both characters actually are fully consenting and it's all just a planned scene, and you'll often see on-screen negotiation and aftercare, and elements of the story may involve the kink community wherever the characters are. Love and Leashes is a great example of this, 50 Shades and Bonding are terrible examples of this, but they all feature characters that know they're doing bdsm and are intentional about it.

if I'm talking about non-diegetic bdsm, I'm referring to a story that portrays certain kinks without the direct acknowledgement that the characters are doing bdsm. this would be something like Captive Prince, or Phantom of the Opera again, or the vast majority of bodice ripper type stories where an innocent woman is kidnapped by a pirate king or something and totally doesn't want to be ravished but then it turns out he's so cool and sexy and good at ravishing that she decides she's into it and becomes his pirate consort or whatever it is that happens at the end of those books. the characters don't know they're playing out a cnc or D/s fantasy, and in-universe it's often straight up noncon or dubcon rather than cnc at all. the thing about entirely non-diegetic bdsm is that it's almost always Problematic™ in some way if you're not willing to meet the story where it's at, but as long as you're not judging it by the standards of diegetic bdsm, it's just providing the reader the same thing that a partner in a scene would: the illusion of whatever risk or taboo floats your boat, sometimes to extremes that can't be replicated in real life due to safety, practicality, physics, the law, vampires not being real, etc. it's consensual by default because it's already pretend; the characters are vehicles for the story and not actually people who can be hurt, and the reader chose to pick up the book and is aware that nothing in it is real, so it's all good.

this difference is where people tend to get hung up in the discourse, from what I've observed. which is why I started using this phrasing, because I think it's very crucial to be able to differentiate which one you're talking about if you try to have a conversation with someone about the portrayal of bdsm in media. it would also, frankly, be useful for tagging, because sometimes when you're in the mood for non-diegetic bodice ripper shit you'd call the police over in real life, it can get really annoying to read paragraphs of negotiation and check-ins that break the illusion of the scene and so on, and the opposite can be jarring too.

it's very possible to blur these together the same way Phantom of the Opera blurs its diegetic and non-diegetic music as well. this leaves you even more open to being misunderstood by people reading in bad faith, but it can also be really fun to play with. @not-poignant writes fantastic fanfic, novels, and original serials on ao3 that pull this off really well, if you're okay with some dark shit in your fiction I would highly recommend their work. some of it does get really fucking dark in places though, just like. be advised. read the tags and all that.

but yeah, spontaneous writer plug aside, that's what I mean.

[69constellationsinatrenchcoat]

Reminder

DID isn't just having fun people in your head

Along with shifts in personality, it's often times:

amnesia: 'waking up' with no memory of what's going on

travelling and having no idea where you are or how you got there

dizziness

confusion

spacing out

headaches

feeling broken & worthless

fear

not knowing why or how you're wearing what you're wearing

nausea

pain

anxiety

finding things amongst your belongings you don't remember acquiring

time loss

depression

suicidal ideation & action

spikes in inexplicable emotion, especially anger, fear, and shame

body and voice dysphoria

depersonalization & derealisation

loss of control

hearing voices

finding injuries you don't remember getting

self harm

not recognising friends/family/colleagues

forgetting important events (birthdays, parties, graduations etc)

mood shifts with seemingly no trigger

finding notes in similar handwriting but something about it is slightly off

flashbacks: somatic flashbacks, nightmares, split second flashbacks to 'little things' but not getting more detail

bed wetting

age regression

inadvertently lying, or being questioned if you have

feeling like your body isn't yours

knowing something is wrong, but not what

wondering why your body doesn't align with your perceived sex (for alters whose gender/sex don't align with the body)

watching your body do things and having no control over it (feeling like a puppet or like playing a video-game in 3rd person)

mass fluctuations in libido: fluctuations from hypersexual to zero sexual desire

not being sure if things really happened, or whether you imagined/thought about them

identity confusion

+ many more

I have two book recommendations DID experiences: "All Of Me" by Kim Noble, and "The Girl in The Green Dress" by Jeni Haynes. Please check trigger warnings.

[renard-dartigue]

Hi now i'm curious what is the beef with the rappers

Man this is going to be long so I'll try to keep this simple and entertaining. I hope this comes across as clear cause I'm shook right now.

Here is a glossarie to break thing up:

Prologue (The Spark 🔥)

Round 1.1 (Physical Education 💪🏾)

Interlude part 1 (Roots 🏠)

Round 1.2 (2 Warning Shots 🔫)

Interlude part 2 (Pusha the Seer 👁)

Round 2.1 (Knifes Out 🔪 )

Round 2.2 (The Nuke 💥)

Epilogue (All eyes on him 👀)

My Theory 🤷🏾‍♂️

Highly recommend checking out the tracks yourself while you read along.

Prologue (The Spark)

Let it be known that I am a neutral party and that I don't take sides when it comes to rap beef. I was here for the music and creativity. I am just trying to recount events to the best of my knowledge. Sorry if some details are inaccurate.

Okay so basically, Drake, J Cole, and Kendrick Lamar are the Big 3 of the rap world right now.

A month ago, Future and Metro Boomin (two rapper who supposedly don't fuck with Drake anymore) released a song with Kendrick Lamar called "Like That". In the song Kendrick took a shot at Drake and J Cole, saying there isn't a big 3, its only him on top.

4 weeks ago J Cole dropped a track called "7 Minute Drill" that is dissing Kendrick. However, in a move that is very uncharacteristic of J, he took down the official track and formally apologized to Kendrick. Thus signaling his exit from the rap battle.

ROUND 1.1 (Physical Ed)

Drake on the other hand dropped "Push Ups" 2 weeks ago, a diss track that went after other rappers he doesn't like but mainly Kendrick. In it, he made fun of Kendrick's height and his contracts. He then ends the song with "I was really try'n keep it PG" meaning he has a nuke on Kendrick that people don't know.

Not long later, Drake dropped ANOTHER diss track "Taylor Made Freestyle" with Ai voices of Snoop Dog and fucking 2PAC! Kendrick has stated before that 2pac is one of his idols so this must have been a deep cut. In the song Drake claims Kendrick doesn't write his own music and uses the writers of Taylor Swift. Relating a rapper to pop music is seen as disrespectful.

INTERLUDE PART 1 (Roots)

Before I continue, I want to give a brief run down on how the public perceives these two rappers.

Drake portrays himself as a superstar, he's always on social media flaunting his success and partying with other celebrities, seeing alot of women and living a lavish lifestyle. His music is catchy, something you put on in the club. Most of his fan base praise him for his sick beats and witty lyrics. He's been in the music industry for a while and is no push over.

Kendrick Lamar is a very private person, doesn't expose anything about his personal life unless its on a track. He almost never gets into fights with anyone. He is a family man, stressing the importance of being there for his wife and son and encourages other fathers to do the same. His fan base praise him for his creative lyrics and highlighting the black American condition.

ROUND 1.2 (2 Warning Shots)

2 Day ago, Kendrick Lamar came back with his first official diss track on Drake called "Euphoria". In this song, Kendrick goes in on Drakes fake personality. Drake has always been known around the community as a bit of a poser, he grew up in Canada and was raised by his white mother, a relatively comfortable childhood. He was a star on the popular show Degassi when he was young. garnering him a fan base early in his career. Kendrick doesn't approve of Drake appropriating black American culture and acting like he some tough guy. When in reality he is a Canadian nerd thats disrespectful to 2pac. All throughout the song, Kendrick hits at things that many people have know about Drake, such as his behavior around underage girls. He also called Drake a deadbeat father who isn't in his son's life, even referencing his lost battle to Pusha T. Then Kendrick finally warns him that he has more dirt that he is willing to share if Drake takes things further.

Similar to Drake, Kendrick dropped another track called "6:16 in LA" later that day. This song focuses on Drake's environment, specifically the people he hangs with. Kendrick implies that Drake paid people to dig into his background and when they didn't find anything, Drake made up stuff instead. Kendrick then says that someone in Drakes group is leaking information to him about something even more serious. Also planting a seed in Drake's mind that his supposed friends don't actually like him, just like the clout from hanging around him.

INTERLUDE PART 2 (Pusha the Seer)

Taking a quick break again, we need to discuss something that occurred long before Drake's battle with Kendrick.

5 years ago, Drake was in a rap battle with rapper Pusha T, someone who was smaller than Drake at the time in terms of popularity. Pusha dropped a song called "The Story of Adidon" where he dropped a bomb that Drake had a kid and wasn't taking care of him. Drake initially denied it but it was later revealed to be true.

Since then Drake has never responded to Pusha T's diss track, making Pusha the current winner. And Kendrick is bringing it back into the light.

Round 2.1 (Knifes Out)

Around 2 am EST time of May 4th, Drake drops his diss track, "Family Matters" one of his strongest songs, switching his flow 3 times in the span of 7 minutes. In true Drake fashion, its a club song with a catchy beat. Like his previous diss, its aimed at multiple people but the main focus is on Kendrick, even bring up "I was really try'n keep this PG".

Drake doubles down on his black identity and mocks the fact that Kendrick and other rappers are saying he isn't black, (incorrectly assuming that they are coming at him for being mixed when the real issue is that he is appropriating black American rap culture as a Canadian mixed man who grew up in a safe environment) Drake not only calls Kendrick a fraud who only raps about black issues for attention, Or that his activism is performative. He makes a shocking claims that Kendrick is a wife beater. Then Drake says that Kendrick's son doesn't belong to him and implies Kendrick's producer was the real father.

The track caused an uproar. But only for the span of 15 minutes. Because Kendrick did the unthinkable.

ROUND 2.2 (THE NUKE)

Almost as if expecting Drake's move, Kendrick Lamar did what no one saw coming. He dropped his diss track "Meet The Grahams" about 15 minutes after Drake released "Family Matters".

This time around, in a fashion almost unheard of from him, Kendrick strips all the usual metaphors from his lyricism and structures his track like he is speaking to Drake and his family, 4 parts per individual.

Kendrick begins by speaking to Drakes Son, Adonis, the same son Pusha T exposed Drake for neglecting 5 years ago. He's apologizing to him for his father's behavior. Kendrick speaks to him softly but sternly like a mentor, telling him not to be like his father. Kendrick tells Adonis all the things Drake did and warns him not to do them too: involved with escorts, plastic surgery to appear more black, surgery to look more muscular, hiding a kid. (Kendrick stresses that Adonis is black regardless of being mixed, further highlighting that he isn't discrediting Drake's blackness because he's mixed but because he isn't being himself.) Finishing of by telling the kid to be proud of who he is.

The second half is Kendrick addressing Drake's mother and father, Sandra and Denise. Kendrick speaks to her like he's revealing tragic news, explaining to her that her son is involved in disgusting things. He goes down a list of things, his tone growing more intense and angry. Kendrick then claimed that Drake is employing and enabling pedos in his group, and hopes they die. Even implying that his group is going to be raided by the feds some day.

The third half is the MOST shocking of all. Kendrick begins talking to an unnamed individual, simply calls her babygirl. Similar to Adonis, Kendrick takes on a somber tone and apologizes to her for Drakes behavior. He says its not her fault Drake abandoned her, says that she is deserving of love. He warns her not to become a target for people like Drake to pray on and says she has so much to offer the world.

Kendrick revealed Drake has ANOTHER kid and isn't in their life! (Allegedly)

To close of, the fourth half is Kendrick speaking directly to Drake, his tone tired. He tries to reiterate that he doesn't have hate for him. However, Kendrick says Drake was the first one to go after his family and he couldn't let it slide. He once again calls for Drake to take the mask off. Then says this isn't a rap battle anymore, tells Drake he is fighting himself.

Epilogue (All eyes on him)

And so here we are, waiting for what will happen next.

Drake posted an Instagram story denying the claim he has another kid. But given what happened with Pusha T, we can't quite take his word for it yet. We should wait a bit to see if anything comes out.

Kendrick hasn't put out a statement on Drake's claims about him but given the recurring theme of Drake being a manipulative lier, Kendrick clearly denies it. Given how private he is, its difficult to prove or disprove it. Much like Drake's claims, we will have to wait and see if any evidence comes out about it.

Drake and Kendrick stans are at eachothers throats right now, arguing over who one and whats real or fake.

Right now everyone is looking to see if Drake is going to continue the battle or stay silent like he did with Pusha.

My Theory

Personally as an outside observer who only followed the beef for good music. I think this goes beyond a simple rap battle.

Here is my theory: Someone from Drake's clique told Kendrick that Drake and his producers were writing something about him. Real or fake, Kendrick was pissed. And so he drafted 3 tracks, dumping everything he hates about Drake into them. And then, with the leaker's help, Kendrick baited Drake into a battle, goading Drake to drop the "Family Matters" track so he can shut the battle down with "Meet the Grahams". Or maybe his first 2 tracks were a warning to Drake that if he released a track with lies on him he would reveal he has another kid.

I do think Kendrick initially had good intentions in trying to help Drake be a better person. But maybe the more he learned about Drake the less sympathetic he felt.

But I don't know thats just how I see it.

Thanks for reading my essay. I hope it made sense heh. I encourage healthy discussions in the comments and reblogs please. But everyone agrees that Drake is inappropriate with young girls. We won't argue over that.