#but with a goal and acceptance by himself and those around him that his actions really are reprehensible and cannot truly be atoned for

[captain-astors]

Creature. (The rendered ones are referenced from manga panels)

[inherentchaos]

I actually can’t that was such a beautiful and perfect ending for our four protagonists.

Telemachus getting a moment to be his own but finally getting to reunite with his father and receiving that validation. His own father acknowledging his STRENGTH and reciprocating the great amount of longing and love.

Athena realizing that the way she led Odysseus astray was wrong, that Odysseus was always a true warrior of the mind. That the way she led him turned him into a brutal monster and not the cunning warrior she was looking for. Her realizing that her actions led to him becoming RUTHLESS, and that ruthlessness comes at the cost of empathy. Then finally her graciousness in accepting that she has to let Odysseus be, and that the world he used to chase is now in her hands. Athena learning the greatest lesson from her most prized pupil, EMPATHY.

Penelope getting her moment of pure strength and authority when finally in the presence of her equal and her life partner. Telling Odysseus that all those things he had done, fighting to get home to her, it doesn’t matter. They both did what they had to do. She is frustrated at the idea he thinks she could deny him her love, because everything she has done, everything they have both done has been for LOVE.

And finally Odysseus. Haunted by the things he has done, but finally after so so so long he is finally on the upperhand in his own home. Slaying those who threaten those who he loves. Reuniting with the son who is a vision of him, but softer, kinder, still his boy. Then confronting Athena as an equal, standing his ground and telling her that it does not matter if she has come around, she isn’t apart of his agenda anymore, so he dismisses her. Not out of anger, but out of an exhaustion for the games of gods, the world isn’t his concern anymore, not after all he’s done. His last goal is to reunite with his wife. And when he finally does see her, he apologizes for years of wrongdoing, begging her to still love him thinking that he has lost sight of who he is. Then when he thinks that she is betraying the love he literally carved for her he speaks up and pours his heart out to her, revealing that underneath all his grit and tragedy he is still himself. He is still ODYSSEUS, king of Ithaca, but more importantly husband to PENELOPE.

EPIC was truly a journey which was such an honor to watch. From the first snippets of songs on tiktok, to this. The finally of our heros, and the truly epic conclusion of the journey we have been on.

I cannot wait to see what this amazing man comes up with next.

[peachsukii]

— feelings left unspoken

Falling in love with Katsuki is something out of this world, thrilling and comfortable. The intricacies of his soul come undone and rewound for the right person and form an unbreakable connection.

✮ content. fluff fluff fluff. just how katsuki acts in love. part of @seiwas one year anniversary collab!

Deconstructing Katsuki Bakugo to his core was not something you envisioned happening in your lifetime, nor did you ever think you would be the one responsible. Everyone assumes that he is unable to be tamed, that raging fire on constant display impossible to smother, a knot tied so tightly that it could never be unwoven. Intimidating as it may have been, being in Bakugo's orbit was enough to let you know how he operates on a surface level. Brash, guarded, but more than anything, passionate. His determination and drive surrounded him like an aura, a prismatic ray of light that was impossible to look away from whenever he was near. It inspired you - something you were sure to express to him, no matter how many confused looks he'd give you in response.

Bakugo tried his damndest to keep himself held together when it came to love, refusing to come undone over a crush or bursts of butterflies in his stomach whenever you were near. It's not that he perceives those feelings as a weakness, but rather something he's afraid of failing at. Love was never on the forefront of his mind, a goal that always took a backburner to everything else. He'd tell himself time and time again if it's meant to happen, it will. Despite his harsh nature, that didn't stop you from wanting to linger in his space and get to know the real Bakugo - when he let you, of course. And to your surprise? Even the strongest of fortresses are able to be breached. He was tired of waiting for love to fall into his lap and took matters into his own hands.

He opened the palace gates for you with fanfare, but there was a catch. He insisted on earning you, that he didn't deserve you served on a silver platter with no effort. Bakugo doesn't do anything half-assed, and when it came to you? His personal expectations were through the stratosphere. That meant exchanging sweet nothings over dinner in a dingy bar in the city after a long patrol shift, strolling through the park on a sunny afternoon, inviting you to come camping with his friends so he can show you his favorite lookout point, buying your favorite expensive coffee each morning from the café on the corner (even though it's out of his way), and stargazing from the balcony of his apartment while you two talk about life until your eyes threaten to close. He's never vocalized how grateful he is for you to be around him, let alone give him the time of day, but his actions forever speak louder than any words he could use. It becomes second nature for him, those little things that silently say "I love you." It's little gestures that convey a thousand words.

Out to dinner with friends, Bakugo's hand lingers on your thigh under the table or his ankle is crossed over yours. Every time he holds a door open for you, his palm lays against the small of your back as you pass by. If you're at an event together, his hand never leaves your waist. Whenever you two are cooking together in the kitchen, he gives your shoulders a light squeeze anytime he walks passed you. Bakugo will cage you against his chest anytime you're on the couch, whether it's watching a movie or reading a book, he needs your warmth pressed against him to truly be comfortable. And every night, he refuses to go to bed before pinching your cheeks lovingly and placing a sweet kiss to your lips, whispering “love you” against them.

Through it all, Bakugo's let you unravel him piece by piece with the patience of a saint, secretly thriving on having someone accept his own version of love. There was nothing keeping you from traveling down every cobblestone road of his heart, no matter how rocky it became. He lets you unwind his stubborn nature a little bit at a time, giving him grace to find comfort in his personal love language. It didn't fit into any pre-determined category that most people would align themselves with, but borrowed from multiple to make it his own. To you, he's just Katsuki - your Katsuki - and you wouldn't trade him for the world.

bkg tags ; @slayfics @maddietries @starieqq  @liluvtojineteyam @jays-adventure3 @simp-plague@napbatata @Yoyolovesdaiki @queenpiranhadon@kirishimaeijiromyman @strwbrrykthv @hayatoseyepatch network ; @pixelcafe-network

[keferon]

This is such a complex and nuanced topic that I can’t stop thinking now about artificial intelligence, personhood, and what it means to be alive. Because golem!Prowl actually seems to exist somewhere in the intersection of those ideas.

Certainly Prowl does not have a soul. And yet, where other golems depicted in mimic au seem to operate primarily as rule-based entities given a set of predefined orders that define their function, Prowl is able to go a step further — learning and defining his own rules based on observation and experience. Arguably, Prowl is even more advanced in this regard than real-world AI agents we might interact with such as ChatGPT (which still requires humans to tell it: when to update it’s knowledge, what data to use, and what that data means) currently are. Because Prowl formulates knowledge not just from a distillation and concentration of the most prominent and commonly accepted ideas that have come before.

He shows this when he rejects all the views that society accepts — resulting in the formulation of the idea that Primus must be wrong. And in a lot of ways, Prowl’s learning that gets him to ultimately reach that conclusion seems a lot more closely related to how we learn. He learns from observing the actions of those around him, from listening to what the people closest to him say and from experiencing things for himself. And this also shows in the beginnings of his interaction with Jazz. Prowl may know things like friendship as abstract concepts, but he only can truly come to define what they mean because he is experiencing them.

In some ways then, what seems to make Prowl much more advanced in his intelligence is that the conclusions he ultimately draws — the way he updates his understanding of the world to fit the framework he’s been given — is something he does independently. And this is what sets him apart.

So is he a person? Given his lack of soul or spark perhaps not. But then again, what truly defines humanity, for lack of a better word? Because perhaps there is not a clear and distinct line to tell when mimicry and close approximation crosses over to become the real thing.

But given the way that Prowl learns and interacts with the world around him, it does not seem too far-fetched to say that he is alive. And further, that he seems a fairly unique form of life within this continuity. Therefore, is he not his own individual? In much the same way that the others this society deems beasts and monsters because of their unique abilities are also individuals.

It’s just really interesting to think about.

(But I will stop myself there, because I did not initially think this would get as long as it did and I feel like I’ve already written an entire thesis in an ask at this point!)

DAMN That’s a really really interesting essay you got here👁

If we take an artificially created algorithm based on seek a goal -> complete the goal but then give it learning capability of a real person. At what point it’s gonna just become one? And if it gains the ability to have emotions. Could they be considered “real” if it’s processing them in it’s own way completely unknown to us?

I love making stories that force me to question the entire life hahdkj

[onceonafullmoon]

rin headcannons🙏🙏

I think you and Rin would start off as childhood friends, with you both meeting in preschool

You’d always think that he was a little strange with his destructive tendencies but you’d also find him interesting, so you’d always ask him to play with you

And albeit, kind of quiet, he isn’t an unfriendly kid so he obliges, given that you’re willing to play monster trucks with him

Besides he secretly thinks you’re kinda pretty too, so he doesn’t mind hanging out with you

And eventually, those school hangouts turn into playdates at his house with his older brother supervising the two of you rather disinterestedly

He definitely promises to marry you in the future because you’re his best friend and he wants to “have sleepovers with you everyday”

Eventually as the two of you grow older, he stops saying stuff like that and blushes in embarrassment when you remind (tease) him about it

But the two of you remain close, with you watching all of his games and cheering for him on the sidelines, occasionally crashing on him and his brothers popsicle runs

(Sae won’t admit it, but he has a soft spot for the two of you)

And it’s all very comforting to Rin, even when Sae moves to go to Spain because he still has you, doesn’t he?

And with age brings awkward pre teen romance, or rather, the dormant feelings he already has for you and he finds himself thinking about you all too often, though he’s much too shy to tell you

Not that you’re unaffected either as you can’t help but notice how cool he is sometimes (on the field at least, he’s still a dork in your eyes)

But all of that is shattered with just one snowy night, with an argument that takes place after Sae comes back from Spain

You’re not quite sure what went down, as Rin refuses to tell you, but all you know is that after that day he seems more… withdrawn, cold even

He starts ignoring you, pushing you away and you find yourself hurt from the abruptness of it all

It all comes to a head when he’s accepted into Blue Lock, and you only find out about it because his mother mentions to you in passing

And you’re upset, because he hasn’t told you about anything, and he’s always pushing you away, and he fires back at you that you’re a distraction to his goals and he doesn’t need you around

And after that explosive argument, he leaves for Blue Lock and you resolve yourself to move on… or at least try to

It’s not until a few years after that, that you both find each other again, both of you visiting your hometowns

He’s a pro player now and you notice that he’s grown even more handsome since you’ve seen him last, but you try to ignore that as you awkwardly greet him, unsure of how to interact with him from your last sighting

Well, not like you’re the only one struggling, he’s also stunned by how gorgeous his childhood crush and ex friend is now as well as racked with guilt for his past actions

The both of you bumble through pleasantries, a million things left unsaid between you two, and you move to leave when he suddenly blurts out an invitation to lunch

You’re startled and he’s more startled, but plays it like he meant it all along, even though his look of relief when you accept is obvious

The tension is strange at first, but as you reminisce on old childhood memories, you find yourself loosening up, until you’re both acting the same as you always have

Obviously though, you have to address the elephant in the room and after a few days of dancing around the subject you ask him why he left you in that way

And, albeit hesitantly, he tells you about his falling out with Sae and how he felt so determined to be the best he felt the need to push you away

To which you quietly respond that he didn’t need to push you away because you would have done whatever you could to help him achieve his dream

And after that heart to heart you find the two of you growing closer together again, like you always were

Albeit, it's a little different without the blindness of your youth to cover up the obvious attraction you have to each other, but both of you are too shy

That is until one night when you’re talking, and suddenly he just realizes how… pretty you look, and the way the lighting hits your face… and suddenly he’s leaning in towards you

And he realizes what he’s doing too late, but you’re leaning in too, and when your lips meet, it just feels right

And that’s how you finally get together, after years in the making

As a boyfriend Rin can be… just a tad bit obsessive/possessive

It’s not like he’s gonna have you on lock down or anything, though he might think about it a bit too much, but he’s noticeably on edge whenever someone intrudes on the two of you

He’s also got infinitely more patience with you than anyone else (something that you can abuse if you’re feeling particularly evil)

He says he doesn’t like pet names, he is lying

Likes watching horror movies with you if you enjoy them (but he also doesn’t mind if you’re the type to get scared easily and cling to him)

He’s not very verbally affectionate, but he’ll make up for it with physical touch (always having an arm around you, pulling you into a hug when he comes back from practice etc.)

No matter how long you’ve been dating him, he still gets flustered when you’re overly sweet with him 

In all, a cute relationship, and you’re not getting rid of him anytime soon

After all, even though it was all those years ago, he said he was gonna marry you, didn’t he?

[mapoeggplant]

skip to loafer chapter 68 + shima analysis // spoilers

acceptance of the monster: how facing the past is necessary when the goal is a brighter future

i think that those who have been following me for a while have seen all my analyses and random insights about shima. i have immense affection for him and he will always be one of my favorite characters ever. and chapters like this remind me of how important he is in my life. 

chapter 68 is very straight to the point, but it also hides some small and big changes that started to bubble up from previous chapters. for the first time, we no longer have small, not very explicit scenes from shima's memories or him being so afraid of finally facing the past: now we have the naked truth, laid out in front of us, so that we can understand a little more about how the childhood that shaped shima's entire life until now was.

unlike what i imagined, i didn't get angry with taiga now that he was introduced. of course, i don't think his actions were right or that he didn't influence shima in a negative way, but his appearance at that moment served as both a salvation and a tragedy for shima's life.

there are many layers to be analyzed. we know very, very little about taiga, but we can understand that he didn't have a very good relationship with his family either — the moment he talks about his parents' disappointment in him for giving up acting shows us that he was probably also forced to do something he didn't want to do. he is also the result of a desire imposed on him, causing him to rebel as the years went by.

in a way, meeting shima is like meeting your past self. i don't see much evil in his actions or see it as something malicious. i think he recognized in shima's face the same nervousness that he himself felt every time before his rehearsal, thus proposing that he also have an act of rebellion to feel a little freer.

however, the evil of all this is that taiga, without knowing anything, ends up entering shima's life at a time when he is most fragile and hurt by everything he has been facing (whether it be his abusive relationship with his mother or his growing fear of acting). shima sees taiga as an equal, someone who understands all the pain he has faced but managed to escape from it, while he’s still a prisoner. he sees the older boy as an inspiration, as a friend he longed for, who would show him what a life away from cameras and rehearsals would be like.

shima is still too young to understand everything that is happening around him, and too young to see any kind of problem in following his new friend. having a destructive act at a time of such fragility gives him a certain strength, because he understands this as the only way he has to face his mother and go against everything that is imposed on him. going out with taiga, even if secretly, is a message to his mother: you no longer have control over me.

unfortunately, we have known the result of these escapades for a long time. ririka, also worried about shima, decides to follow him and ends up being targeted by several online attacks. even though shima was the one who “took” her there, ririka, a beautiful and successful girl, is the perfect target.she is the one who suffers the direct consequences, and of course this is closely linked to the sexism that is rooted in society and how much people wait for a girl to make a small mistake so that they can destroy her in some way (i talk more about this in my exclusive ririka analysis).

now shima no longer has to face just two monsters: they have now multiplied into a thousand, becoming even stronger. the consequences of his rebellion come in an aggressive form, with his mother’s abuse and the new tarnished image he obtained in his artistic circle. his mother’s anxiety comes from the fact that shima would no longer get big roles, either because of this transgression or because he missed so many rehearsals, which did not lead to any improvement in terms of acting. blinded by all the anger she feels inside, shima's mother's direct response is no other than to attack her son.

child abuse is extremely common in the arts, whether by parents, the press, the public or co-workers. shima is just one of many young actors who have had to suffer the wrath of a parent who is disappointed by a dream that they themselves forced their children to have. and of course, this would result in years of being afraid to be who they are, to speak out and to live a normal life without carrying immense guilt. the prison that he has placed himself in for all these years is the evolution of the bonds imposed by his mother.

the turning point does not happen in this chapter itself, but in a sequence of long events that led him to where he is. it is impossible for shima to change overnight: it takes a lot of work and a lot, but a lot of analysis (even if it is self-analysis) to finally understand and be able to heal all this pain that he has been held hostage by for so many years. and the second part of the chapter shows exactly that.

shima is no longer afraid to face the monster of the past because he is no longer alone. he finally understands that there are people around him who care about him and fight to stay by his side. having people's support and love gives him the strength to move forward and continue this arduous battle of growing up. shima now understands what it is to be loved to the point of being happy about a past fight, as it resulted in an even closer relationship with mitsumi. he understands that being loved is being able to look back on the past and no longer feel pain or guilt, but to recognize the one who suffered so much, with no one by his side.

he now takes on the role of the monster, but no longer to affirm his guilt, but to be able to show his past self and all the other monsters around him how it is possible for him to be happy. how it is possible to decide things for yourself and follow your heart. how it is possible to love so many people and be loved in return. how it is possible to look at a person and feel an immense warmth, an inexplicable desire to keep fighting, all so that he can be by their side. 

shima is finally reaching out to his past self, so that they can form a new future together.

before i finish, i would also like to touch on an important point that i see the possibility of being discussed in the future: shima's current relationship with his mother. chapter 67 brought something very important, which was shima's recognition when he admitted that he felt a certain pity for his mother, due to all the comments he heard about her. deep down, he feels a certain empathy for his mother and no longer sees her as an unbeatable villain. he has been slowly trying to change his relationship with her, and the first step is to invite her to watch the play he chose to be in. this in my opinion shows shima's desire to forgive his mother in order to move on, but also seek some kind of forgiveness from her (which can be a result of many years of manipulation, since he still thinks he is guilty for a lot of his mother’s pain). i feel that we will still see a type of closeness between them and a deeper conversation, so that shima can finally feel like he belongs to a family again. this can be a triggering moment to a lot of readers, so if it does happen, please be mindful of it. 

the layers that not only this chapter but this whole new arc has are much deeper than we imagine. building a character requires love, patience and conversation. you need to listen and understand what your character wants. respect is needed so that the story can grow. takamatsu misaki has a huge affection for her characters, for her story and for everything she has been building since 2018.

we're so lucky to be able to follow such amazingly beautiful story.

thank you so much for reading 💛💛!! don't forget to support sensei if you can! always here to discuss more about the chapter!

[loredrinker]

Solas' Blurred Motivations

I've been enjoying discourse around Solas, lately it seems to be how he views modern elves. Some argue that he doesn’t care about them, while others insist that he does. 

What if the issue isn’t whether he cares or not, but how his reasoning has blurred over time? 

Solas’ has never acted out of apathy. On the contrary, he is an emotional being. His choices are driven by urgency, conviction, and a ruthless determination to see his plans through. The closer he gets to his goal, it seems the more ruthless he becomes. Is this ruthlessness innate - or is it the desperation of a man who believes he has one last chance to set things right?

Even if Solas comes to accept the people of Thedas as real, I don’t believe he could ever truly accept Thedas as his world. He will always see it as a broken version of what should be - and that’s where the blurring comes from. He convinces himself that restoring the ancient world is the same as saving modern elves. But it never can be. 

His regret mural with Mythal is a good indicator. It shows us that even Solas, through his own memories, recognizes that his justifications are flawed: 

"Why should I not tear down the Veil and bring immortality to all the elven people? They deserve it!" 

In his mind, he isn’t imposing destruction. He has rationalized destruction as salvation. 

But Mythal exposes his self-deception: 

"The elven people of today do not deserve to see the world they love be torn apart to salve your conscience!" 

Solas has lost perspective. His reasoning is no longer about the elves, but about his guilt, just as it was in Inquisition: 

"I was too weak to unlock it after my slumber. The failure was mine. I should pay the price. But the people... they need me. I'm so sorry." 

Solas was framing his actions as something for the people back in Inquisition - but his self-imposed responsibility was distorting his reality then – a distortion we see in how even Solas recalls that memory in Veilguard. 

Anyone under prolonged stress, trauma, and guilt will begin fusing personal needs with external justifications. Solas isn’t thinking clearly - his reasoning has become warped.  

I truly believe Solas does not operate in malice. He is not evil, is not led by hate. Some may see him in absolutes, I can't. His goal of returning to the elves what he had taken shifts into an obsession with the Veil itself, regardless of consequences. Any compassion he may have held for modern elves is blurred over time by his guilt for what he did to the elves of the past. Blurred by his guilt of what he did to the Titans.

So, I don’t think it’s that Solas doesn’t care for modern elves – he has tunnel vision. He can't see that modern elves might not want his world - because he can never actually live in theirs. 

Mythal’s Death 

It’s interesting that Solas leans more into ruthlessness after Mythal is murdered. Before, he was a revolutionary leader - freeing slaves, fighting against tyranny. But after Mythal’s death, he becomes something else. His choices grow colder - sacrificing spirits, elves, and allies alike.

Felassan notices this shift - Solas is no longer leading a freedom movement, but pursuing vengeance. His mission to destroy the Evanuris has overtaken everything. And we see this pattern repeat in Veilguard - after Inquisition. Solas consumed by his goal, withdraws from those he created connections with, just as he did with Felassan. The isolation of a revolutionary who no longer listens. 

The closer Solas gets to his goal, the more consumed and desperate he seems to become. He loses sight of the people in his pursuit of 'saving them' (in pursuit of a world that Mythal would have 'wanted').

When Ideals Become Chains

Fiction is full of characters who lost themselves in their ideals. People so consumed by an end goal that the means overtake the original intent. I think of Boromir from The Lord of the Rings - his intentions with the Ring were initially good. He wanted to protect his people so badly, but he became obsessed with its power and nearly lost himself. Or Anakin Skywalker, whose fear of losing Padmé, his mother, pushed him into desperation, leading him to betray everything he once fought for. 

Solas has ideals, but he’s lost sight of them and his belief in freedom does not make him immune to war’s darker influences. War does not leave its fighters unchanged. Soldiers return from battle with fractured identities, blurred morality, and wounds both seen and unseen. The longer they fight, the harder it becomes to separate the cause they once believed in from the choices they made to survive. Why can’t this aspect be applied to Solas as well? He's been in war for millennia.

Solas may, deep down, truly want to restore immortality, to restore magic - but the path to hell is paved with good intentions. He sees only his sin, his failure, the suffering his actions have created.

I don’t think Solas can ever exist in Thedas as it is today. It’s no longer his world. Leaving to enter the Fade prison seems the only path left to him, especially if he chooses it willingly. He may come to accept that modern Thedas deserves to endure, but that doesn’t mean he can endure within it. 

Discussions about Solas often call for nuance, to think in terms of grey rather than black and white, yet many still judge his actions in absolute terms - either as wholly justified or entirely unforgivable. In reality, his choices and actions exist in complication and complexity.

[depravitycentral]

Enji Todoroki General Yandere Profile

Yandere! Enji Todoroki x fem! reader

Tw: kidnapping, stalking, power imbalances, financial trapping, mentions of physical/domestic abuse, mentions of non-con, sexist undertones, Enji wants you to be his cute little housewife, mentions of breeding/pregnancy, a few mentions of making sure you eat enough/food, Enji is patronizing whoo boy, he makes you share a toothbrush and yes he's weird about it, this is set in a divergent timeline where Enji and Rei are formally divorced and his relationship with his family is loose and not super tight, fem reader, MDNI

I do not condone any of the actions described in this post - this is fiction and should be treated as such. If you or a loved one is in a similar situation to anything contained in this post or my blog in general, please seek help. You're in charge of your internet consumption; please make responsible choices. With that, enjoy!

WC: 11K

DARLING PROFILE:

Kind

Enji is, simply, harsh.

His quirk, his mannerisms, his attitude, his everything, really, is a bit rough around the edges, forming a man with only enough self control to get what he wants. He’s lived his whole life bitterly, constantly jealous, constantly wanting, willing to throw everything away in order to achieve his goals.

And once everything starts caving in around him, his family and career both taking unexpected turns, Enji finds himself so, so painfully alone. He doesn’t pretend to delude himself into thinking he’s not deserving of his fate, but this places him into a position where he shoulders the guilt while desperately trying to find any outlet to forget it.

And this is where a darling who is kind comes into play – he needs someone who won’t judge him for his past. He needs someone who doesn’t treat him like scum, who is still polite and empathetic to him and his emotions. A darling who is able to consistently praise him will have him smitten quickly, growing emotionally dependent on hearing their sweet words in order to function, in order to not let the depression and stress get the better of him.

And even once his obsession has formed and he’s deep in the depth of his infatuation, a darling who is just too kind to kick him to the curbside is absolutely essential for him – they must be doting and caring, helping rebuild his shattered confidence and psyche, and with every compliment they dish out, Enji vows that he’ll return the sentiment tenfold, in his own way of course.

(This means buying his darling millions of yen worth of their favorite things, all kinds of wonderful gifts that he hopes will sway them in his favor, that will get them drooling over him and all that he can provide for them.)

Hardworking

Although he’s in a mental state that leaves him much more susceptible to finding a partner once he divorces Rei, Enji is still a picky man. He won’t fall for just anyone – no, they must fit his standard, be acceptable and meet the rather long and detailed checklist he has for those he considers as potential romantic partners.

And near the top of this list is determination. He’s a man motivated by his own goals and is willing to stop at nothing to achieve them – and so, a darling that can at least somewhat match this aspect of his personality is critical.

He has no patience for a darling that gives up easily; he wants someone that’s willing to put in the effort to see it pay off, someone who understands the concept of self-discipline and holding yourself to certain moral standards.

He finds it wildly attractive when someone has strong character, and his interest would immediately be piqued with a darling who brings an attitude of perseverance and hard work into every aspect of their life, be it work, their hobbies, their relationship, and everything in between.

He wants someone who is perhaps not quite as stubborn as him, but is still serious in their goals.

(He hopes that one day, making him happy and pleasing him will be one of these goals – just as pleasing his darling is one of his own. And he’s more than happyto please them in whatever way they so desire. More than happy.)

Motherly

Because he views his darling as the perfect wife, his darling absolutely must possess at least somewhat of a motherly air about them. He likes the idea of having a nurturing partner, if only because he finds it endearing when they care for others.

As a hero he shares this sentiment, and although it may sometimes be overshadowed by his need to become the best, deep down inside he does very much wish to help others – his methodology is just a little more violent, a little more overt.

His darling, by contrast, should prefer a methodology that’s much gentler, something that focuses more on making others feel safe and heard and cared for.

Besides, Enji very much desires to have children with his darling; to build a second family, one that he’ll care for and nourish much better than his first. And so, if his darling is to be a good mother, they must embody these traits.

Besides, although he doesn’t fall for his darling because of his fantasies of making them a mother, once the feelings are formed these daydreams only further his feelings, deepening his obsession because oh, he’d give absolutely anything to see them pregnant with his child, carrying his seed, creating something that symbolizes the love and dedication between them.

And so, his darling needs to be someone who naturally takes care of others – and in return, Enji will take care of them. Just how it should be.

Pushover

This trait is a bit less crucial compared to the others, but it’s still most definitely a positive from Enji’s perspective.

Of course he likes a darling who has strong opinions and stands up for them, but he loves a darling that will let him guide them through any hard decisions, or really any decisions at all.

Although he’s not as outright controlling with his darling, he still very much feels that he wears the pants in the ‘relationship’, and thus he is the one calling the shots.

A darling who is happy to let him take over their life like this is a massive help to him – he doesn’t have to fight for control, nor does he have to argue with them about why certain decisions really should be made by him as the more dominant partner, as the one who knows more about the world, as the man. It’s an outdated view and it’s one that he doesn’t really want to admit out loud, but he enjoys the idea of a partner who will revere him and allow him full control.

He wants to be loved and cherished, and in return for a love like this, he’ll do his best to provide for and take care of his darling in every way he possibly can – so really, if his darling knows what’s best for them, they’ll step back and let him make all the tough decisions.

They’ll nod and smile and agree with whatever he chooses, pressing a kiss against his cheek and telling him how much they trust him, how they know he’d never hurt them, how he only wants what’s best for them.

Just the thought makes something warm swell in his stomach, the level of trust making him feel wanted, needed, a concept so foreign that it almost feels wrong. But oh, how he likes it.

GENERAL YANDERE TRAITS:

Controlling

But in a very, very strange way – a lot of what fuels Enji’s obsession is this desperate, innate need to right his wrongs. He’s very, very aware of how thoroughly he ruined his family, how horribly he treated Rei, how he was a poor excuse of a father and husband, and he sees his love with you as almost being his second try. With you, he can do all the things he should have done with Rei and his children – he should have been sweet and loving, a present father that cared about each of his children equally. He should have been a doting husband, spoiling his wife and making her feel loved and desired.

But he didn’t, and although Rei has long since divorced him, Enji finds himself feeling lonely, incomplete, restless to try again, to properly provide for a sweet little thing he can call his own. And this is where you come in – and from the moment he realizes his feelings for you are more than a simple attraction, he dives in head-first.

He decides he'll approach everything with you in a way as opposite from his previous marriage as possible – he's all grand, romantic gestures, always showing up with a bouquet of flowers in hand and just the slightest pink tint on his scarred cheeks.

The grand, romantic gestures are, of course, merely things he’s seen in rom-coms; the women always look happy when the love interest swoops in with flowers and gifts and pretty clothing, the beaming smile and large hug the man gets as a reward seeming very, very appealing to Enji, despite his rigid exterior.

(Just the thought of you hugging him has his heart racing – it’s something so intimate, so entirely new that it makes every nerve in his body stand on edge, a shiver running up his spine as he imagines the way your body would feel pressed against his, how you’d sigh and sink further against him, how you’d squeeze him and god, the view he’d get when he looks down to see your body pressed so tightly against him that not even a breath of air could separate you -)

He’s scouring through women’s magazines, burying his nose in the glossy pages and searching for ideas and clues as to what women enjoy as courting gifts.

(He has to scoff under his breath every time he sees a new dieting tip or regiment, internally frowning and worrying that you’re seeing these ads and potentially obsessing over your weight. The last thing he’d want is for you to be unhappy with your body – certainly not when he’s so very happy with it. Not to mention the nutritionally heinous foods the magazine recommends – he’d sooner have you eat raw paper than follow this ludicrous advice.)

He’s even caving and very, very awkwardly asking his female sidekicks and employees at his agency about their tips on how to seduce a woman. He struggles to make eye contact with them when he asks, his imposing figure almost reminding them of a shy, nervous teenage boy with the way he’s so earnest about his question, his eyes lighting up when they mention an idea he hasn’t tried yet, pressing them for details and specifics and you must tell me what to say to her – how does one follow up gifting a puppy?

It would be sweet, really, how devoted he is to making sure that you’re absolutely spoiled, that you get a whole variety of lavish gifts designed to sweep you off your feet. It would be wonderful, really, except that Enji has never understood the concept of being too much – which is how everything will start to feel very, very early on in this process.

 It was nice at first to receive a fresh bouquet of roses every morning at your desk with a handwritten card attached. (Written in impeccable handwriting, the cursive letters looping and elegant as they spell out short, simple, sweet messages signed with a capital E at the bottom, reading please make sure to eat enough today and that skirt looks lovely on you.)

 It was nice at first, but after the second week of daily bouquets and even a few finding their way to the doorstep of your apartment, the sight of the pretty red flowers makes a sinking feeling swirl in your gut.

(Enji notices this, dismayed and frustrated by your lack of a positive response, and decides to double down and just gift you bigger flowers, because maybe your lack of joy at receiving the bouquets is because they aren’t big enough, aren’t grandiose enough, aren’t good enough.)

It was nice to get the cute, small stuffed bunny on your desk one morning, and you’d even grown so fond of the little thing that you perched it on the edge of your desk, assuming it was a one-time gift. But it wasn’t – the stuffed animals kept coming, getting bigger and more detailed and much, much more expensive, you’re sure.

(Enji is careful to remove each and every price tag on every gift he sends you, simply because he doesn’t want you to feel that you owe him financially, nor does he want you to be swayed into accepting him as your partner by mere economic standing – that’s an asset that you’ll come to know, of course, but he’d rather lure you in via more traditional ways. It doesn’t exactly stay secret, though, because once the necklace with a delicate array of at least five diamonds in it arrives at your front door, your secret admirer’s wealth becomes very, very difficult to hide.)

He’s gifting you jewelry with more precious jewels and gold and silver than you could possibly wear, and outfitting your closet with all kinds of dresses and skirts out of materials and cuts you could never hope to afford for yourself.

(And, of course, they’re all tailored to fit you perfectly – how Enji managed to get your exact sizes is still a question that haunts you, one that makes you scared to upon the nicely wrapped boxes that you find in excess outside your front door.)

It’s all just too damn much – Enji is suffocating with his attempts to woo you, his every gift and gesture leaving you feeling uncomfortable. What he’s trying to do is very, very obvious – and it feels wrong. He’s the number one hero, a busy man with much more important things to be doing – so why is he going after you? And why with such ferocity?

His forwardness will scare you off, driving you to avoid him and grow suspicious of his motives, and Enji does not like this development. This wasn’t supposed to happen – you’re supposed to want him, to be seduced by all of his efforts, to be swept off your feet and swooned by his gifts and words (delivered with the grace of a garbage truck, of course, but the sentiment is there – even if looking at your pretty face distracts him, all the words leaving his head and making him stand there gaping like a fool).

 Enji doesn’t like it, and so he presses harder, stepping up the frequency and volume of his gifts, only effectively pushing you further and further away from him as you grow more uneased and unsettled. And if you were to confront him about it?

Well, this is where his controlling tendencies come into play – denying who he naturally is can only last for so long, and despite being a man with superb self-restraint, the moment that Enji feels you’re slipping from his fingers he’s morphing back into the man that commands your every move.

Suddenly he’s no longer presenting you with the newest shampoo you’ve been talking about (it’s salon grade, the best stuff out there, and much too expensive, but not for Enji – nothing is too expensive for him when it’s for you) but rather letting this expression wash over his face, one that you’ve never seen before.

It’s cold, remarkably so; his lips are pressed tightly together, his brows perfectly straight, those eyes lifeless as he tells you to stop fighting, go inside and change into the green dress I gave you last week. We’re going for dinner, and you’ll order the house salad and a slice of chocolate cake for dessert. Do you understand me?

 It’s weird and unexpected and scary, and it’ll have you immediately stuttering out a yes and scurrying inside, too frightened to disobey. And really, while Enji winces every time he does this, eventually he finds himself trying to justify it as simply ensuring your relationship will last.

Obviously it’s not good that he has to force you into these small, minor, inconsequential things (like going on a date with him or letting him accompany you home afterwards), but this is different from with Rei – you want this, right? You’re just too shy to tell him how flattered you are about all the attention he’s giving you.

You’re just playing coy, acting on your age-old feminine instincts to make men chase after you, to be demure and make your partner work for your affection and love. And eventually, Enji will convince himself that this is different, he’s wooing you and getting you into a relationship with him willingly – you want him.

You practically love him already – things are going well. They’re successful.

They have to be.

And so, while Enji doesn’t mean to be controlling, the end results is that although he plays the nice guy that spoils you and gives you anything your heart desires, at the end of the day he is the one in charge, and he is the one dictating your relationship.

And really, what can you do to stop him? He’s strong, both physically and with the general population – one word from him and you’d be hunted for like a madman, ostracized from the community, brought back to him like a pup to its owner.

You belong with him, and it’s his job to make you see that – even if you want to remain blind.

Possessive

Enji Todoroki doesn’t share. Once he decides that he wants you, you become unequivocally his.

Sure, he wants to do things a bit differently with you and get you to harbor more loving feelings towards him, but from the moment his infatuation forms you don’t really have a choice in the matter.

 You can pretend like you do, if it makes you feel better (and it will, because at least you can pretend that you have even an ounce of control in the relationship, that you aren’t just some adorable little thing he’s decided he wants hanging off his arm and warming his bed), but at the end of the day you’re subject to Enji’s whims.

And although Enji lets you harbor this fantasy of your relationship being truly consensual, the moment something occurs that threatens it, his true colors are shown. Namely, when he thinks your attention is veering away from him, his jealousy and anger become difficult to keep in check, his quirk acting up and letting off small sparks and flames all along his body. His fists clench and his jaw tightens when he sees another man around you, and although he tries to rationalize that the man likely doesn’t want anything to do with you, just simply being in your presence is enough to make Enji suspicious.

Even if the man isn’t talking to you or acknowledging you in any way, he’s anxious – he’s scared that something about this man will attract you, that you’ll somehow find him better than Enji.

Maybe the man is friendlier – Enji’s aware that he isn’t exactly the most approachable person on the planet.

Maybe he's funnier – Enji knows he can’t crack a joke to save his life.

Maybe he’s a better conversationalist – less formalities and awkwardness, able to get you laughing so hard you snort.

It makes Enji’s skin crawl, his knuckles turning white from how hard he’s fisting his hands, and before long he will intervene. He’ll grab you as gently as he can on the elbow, guiding you carefully but quickly away to the other side of the room and physically maneuvering so that his body is blocking your sight of the man – and more importantly, blocking his sight of you.

He’ll try to talk with you, trying to distract you and get your mind off of the other man, all in an effort to get your attention back on him. He’s reminding you that you have him, that you don’t need some other man, that you already have one who’s capable of providing for you and caring for you as you deserve.

Frankly, he discovers just how deeply his feelings for you run in a situation where jealousy gets the best of him – you’d been approached at a small gathering by a man from another agency who was clearly hitting on you. He was leaning in close, smiling with a smarmy smirk and nursing on his cocktail like a lifeline.

Enji had noticed the two of you out of the corner of his eye, and immediately he’d gone stiff. He couldn’t stop staring at the way the man kept getting gradually closer to you, how he kept leaning in further, how his hand slid from his pocket to your shoulder, then your arm, down to your hand and oh, oh god, it looks like he’s bringing it down to your waist –

Enji had been by your side in mere moments, his gaze card and harsh as he’d stepped in front of you, making some poorly toned excuse about needing to speak with you for a moment, before unceremoniously dragging you away from the stupefied man.

From that day, Enji absolutely refuses to allow anyone close to you. And really, can he be blamed? After all, he fell for you, so why wouldn’t anyone else? You’re beautiful and caring, smart and dignified, and if he can see your potential as a lovely, perfect little wife, surely others can too.

And so, Enji ramps up his controlling tendencies the more he’s presented with situations where the green-eyed monster accompanies him. And this control takes its main form through financials – that is, while Enji originally didn’t want to attract you to him via his material wealth, he decides it’s a necessary evil in order to have you staying by his side only.

He starts ‘forgetting’ to peel off the price tags of the gifts he gives you, pretending not to notice how your eyes practically bug out of your head when you unbox the pink pendant he’d bought for you.

He starts inviting you out for lunches and dinners more often, ordering for you and choosing the most expensive items off the menu despite your numerous pleas that you’ll opt for something – anything – cheaper.

(It’s frustrating, too, because as angry as you want to be at him for ordering for you, he always chooses something you end up liking – of course it’s because he’s done extensive research and stalking, finding out your favorite foods and what flavors you dislike, but it all seems like one large, awfully strange coincidence to you.)

Exerting financial control over you keeps you complacent, because the guilt you’ll feel at how much money he’s sinking into you will have you following his every word, even if it his commands are a little strange and off-putting – like spending less time with any male friends (or really any friends for that matter) or slipping the small photograph of him into your purse (it’s weird and you do so hesitantly, making sure the polaroid is at the bottom of the bag – and trying to ignore the way his muscles are oh-so fucking defined in the tight black shirt he’s sporting in the photograph).

It’s all just a big ploy to keep you from running off with some other man – but really, if you somehow did manage to do that, Enji won’t be particularly merciful. He will be cornering the man as he leaves your apartment and he will be holding him by the neck against the cold concrete wall, threatening him to leave you alone or experience the rather unpleasant sensation of burning alive.

It’s not particularly heroic, but Enji doesn’t care – he can’t, not when the threat of you leaving him for another man is very much present and real. It’s too scary, too much for him to handle – it would mean you rejecting him, his second fuck-up in love, and the loss of someone who fits absolutely every one of his desires in a woman.

You’re too perfect for him to lose – so instead, he’ll own you.

Dependent

He will never admit it, but there’s this part of Enji that grows stronger day by day, every time he sees your face, that tells him in the most raw, real way that he absolutely needs you.

He’s essentially lost what he had of his family, and with the sharp uptake in responsibility as the new number one hero, the new symbol of modern peace, Enji finds himself turning to you in his time of need, in his more vulnerable moments.

Because really, though his exterior is tough and jaded, he’s only human – he too needs someone to love, someone to hold and latch onto, and latch he does. You’re his, and he expects you to understand that even if he doesn’t verbalize it.

He cherishes your very existence, each and every thing you do, finding you to be remarkably weak yet remarkably endearing, your inability to defend yourself simultaneously adorable and frustrating. He needs you to realize that you’re his everything; his whole reason for living now, even if he doesn’t give you many clues into this.

He isn’t the best at expressing his emotions, and although the love and desperation he feels for you is constantly overwhelming him, overflowing from his chest and making him dizzy, he doesn’t articulate just how deeply these feelings run.

Of course he’ll tell you how you’re beautiful, or that you’re my responsibility to protect, but he’ll also say significantly less romantic things like how you belong to him, how he's never letting you out that front door, how he’ll never let those disgusting, filthy villains touch something as perfect as you.

He thinks it’s sweet and exactly what you want to hear, but it’s not – it’s scary and strange and weird, but these are your biggest clues as to his dependence on you.He won’t tell you, but his expectations for you are honestly monumentally high; he wants you to be his perfect little wife, everything that Rei wasn’t, and this includes giving you every ounce of his love.

He wants you to be diligently cooking him hearty meals, keeping the house tidy and clean for the two of you, to be massaging his shoulders while he relaxes from a stressful day at work. (Hell, he even wants you to wear cute little aprons, collars with his name stitched onto them, those maternity/breast feeding bras before you’re even pregnant…)

He wants a domestic fantasy with you, and this extends to other, more vulnerable things as well. He expects you to embrace him as he walks through the door everyday returning home, to give him a light peck on the cheek and ask about his day, to let him hug you from behind and kiss your neck as you slave away over the stove.

He never really got the chance to do such loving things with Rei (not that he particularly wanted to), and as a result he honestly feels like he’s having to make up time, that he needs to be taking every single ounce of affection and love you can possibly give him, and he’ll feel no guilt at all.

He won’t outright ask you to cuddle him, but when he sits on the large, overstuffed leather couch and stares at you expectantly, you’ll quickly learn to run over to him and snuggle up into his side, to bury your face into his chest and wrap your arms and legs around him even if his body heat cooks you alive.

He won’t ever explicitly ask you to give him those fluttery, soft morning kisses he’s seen all the time in terrible corny rom-coms he religiously watched for inspiration while trying to court you, but the moment you smile sleepily at him and press a kiss against his lips while you holds you close in the morning glow?

God, it’s in those moments that he wants to give you absolutely everything he has – every part of his body, soul and heart, every single cent he owns, every piece of fame and fortune he’s ever amassed.

Enji just wants to please you, and although he comes off as an odd mix of demanding yet generous, terrifying yet strangely awkward, inside his heart is hammering against his ribcage every time you so much as smile at him, every time you so much as look at him. In the hazy afterglow of a round of passionate morning sex (in which you’ve realized that fighting will get you nowhere – it’ll only earn you an Enji that’s more frantic and desperate to get you moaning and crying out his name), when he latches onto your smaller, exhausted and sweaty body, pressing you as tightly against him as possible, sometimes his demeanor will crack.

He’ll lean down to deeply inhale the scent of your hair, to watch the way your chest rises and falls, and he’ll whisper in the softest of voices that he loves you, you’re the light of his world. He doesn’t know what he’d do without you, but Enji is hellbent on never finding out – after all, there is no chance of escape with him, and he’s sure you’ll learn your place soon.

After all, pretty, submissive girls like you always do.

DEALING WITH RIVALS: 

Enji is, regrettably, terrible at hiding his jealousy.

He’s always been in a constant state of envy, whether it was vying for the top spot in the heroing world against All Might, desiring the perfect offspring in order to have the Todoroki name and himself live on, and countless other examples. He’s prideful and so fucking jealous of everyone around him, and this is only heightened when it comes to you – his possessiveness over you is nothing to sneeze at, and the minute he feels that your attention is threatened, that you could possibly be yearning for another?

He’s wasting no time stepping in, mercilessly shutting down each and every opportunity you could possibly have of being with anyone other than himself.

As much as he’s loathe to admit it, his jealousy and possessiveness stems from a place of insecurity; he’s aware that he’s by no means the perfect partner, and he rationally knows that you could do much, much better than him.

And so, as a sort of panic-induced response, Enji decides that you simply aren’t allowed to interact with any other men – this way, you aren’t presented with the opportunity to even let the feelings form. And he’s diligent with this theory, too – he’s always standing near you, acting as your shadow with watchful, hawk-like eyes trained on your figure.

He’s never been the best at reading people, but he’s able to tell from miles away when someone approaches you with intentions that are less than innocent, and immediately his lips are thinning, his brows furrowing, his entire body temperature raising by five degrees because you’re his, and this piece of scum disguised as a man obviously doesn’t realize this.

He’s your guardian angel in many ways (though really, he takes the guardian portion much too far – even men who have no romantic intentions with you are viewed as potential threats, shooed away with a vengeance that will make them too afraid to even think about you without imagining themselves engulfed in flames), though at times it will make you feel more than a little patronized.

It’s as if he doesn’t trust you – you don’t really have a relationship, at least in your eyes, but you know the number one hero wants something more than friendship with you. And so, you do your best to avoid evoking his anger and wrath by not romantically involving yourself with another man – and yet that’s not enough for Enji.

It can’t be, simply because as pretty and sweet and smart as you may be, Enji will always know better. It’s a controlling tendency and a mildly sexist view, but he thinks of you as his doting, loving housewife-to-be, and it’s the man’s job to make these sorts of decisions.

You’re just too sweet and outgoing for your own good – you’ll get mixed up in all sorts of trouble if you’re not careful, and lucky little you has someone like Enji to watch out for you and make sure your pretty head has nothing to worry about. And so, Enji sticks to you like glue, warding off potential suitors with grueling stares and a presence and reputation too strong to ignore.

Enji’s day had been long, and one of those days that made him seriously question his abilities as a hero. A villain had managed to trick him, and although Enji had of course eventually arrested the perpetrator, his deception had led to a lot of wasted time and more damage to surrounding buildings than was acceptable.

His head was pounding, his body still feeling overly hot from all of the fighting, and though not normal, he’d decided he was done for the day and left the rest of the agency’s calls to his sidekicks. Leaving early had felt almost freeing in a way, the world looking a bit different with all this extra time – walking down the sidewalk, Enji scanned the windows of each shop he passed.

As per usual, you’d been on his mind all day – flashes of your face sitting just behind his eyelids, your name just a hair away on his tongue, the feeling of your phantom touch sending shivers down his spine. It was irritating, distracting, heavenly, and with each window he passed, he kept an eye out for anything you might like.

He’d gotten you a pretty tea cup set yesterday, and although you’d been hesitant and visibly uncomfortable at receiving such a gift (the set was very, very obviously expensive, the marbled china too perfect and pristine to have costed anything less than a year’s worth of your salary), Enji was eager to gift you something that would be received better today.

Streets passed by, nothing quite suiting his vision for what you deserved – he’d need something more subtle today, something simple and sweet and something he knows you like – The confectionary is small, with swirling black letters over a baby pink banner spelling out the name of the store. The windows are lined with all sorts of chocolates and candies, all wrapped up in pretty, ornate packaging that makes Enji immediately pick up his pace, practically storming into the small shop.

It smells like vanilla and sugar as the door shuts behind him, and although it makes him wince, he knows you’d love it. Shelves nearly as tall as him line the shop in narrow rows, displaying all sorts of sweets that he’s never heard of before – caramels, gumdrops, chocolates, lollipops, anything and everything under the sun.

He’s only been in the store for roughly five minutes, staring at a collection of truffles with furrowed brows and a downward curl of his lip when he hears a small laugh over the gentle, happy classical music playing quietly over the speakers. Immediately he’s perking up – the laugh sounds familiar; the lilt of it, the tonality, the soft intake of breath right after it stops.

His lips part, eyes going wide, and before he can even really control himself he’s rushing towards the source of the noise, his entire face growing warm when he sees you – you’re at the register, a few candies sitting on the wooden slab, your purse in hand as you fish for presumably your wallet.

You look gorgeous today – you’re wearing a shirt he’s never seen before and your favorite pair of jeans (the ones that make your ass look so, so very perfect – perfect to squeeze at, to grope and touch and smack and press himself against…), and although he’s briefly disappointed that you aren’t wearing an item of clothing that he’d gifted you, he notices the clerk all too soon.

The clerk – Hyoshi, his nametag says – is smiling at you. He’s all teeth, a grin that makes the hairs on the back of Enji’s neck stand up, his nostrils flaring because you’d been laughing, and it must be this man’s doing. This man, who’s visibly weak even under the ridiculous confectionary uniform he’s sporting – arms that couldn’t hope to lift even a fraction of what Enji can, a chest that isn’t ruggedly defined like the hero’s, and a stature that’s frankly pathetic compared to the frame of the redheaded man behind you.

Enji’s angry, and as the man opens his mouth to presumably say something else (potentially something that’ll make you laugh again), his words die on his tongue as he glances behind you to see the behemoth of a man who’s quite literally acting as your shadow.

His eyes widen and immediately he’s stuttering out a w-welcome in, Endeavor! At that, your shoulders go stiff, your mouth parting into an adorable little ‘o’ that Enji can practically see in his head, and you slowly turn around.

Oh, hello Endeavor, aren’t you normally on patrol right now?

Enji’s jaw works, and although a small part of him is pleasantly surprised that you’d remembered his patrol shift, your words only serve to further frustrate him. You knew it was his time on the clock – and yet, you’d still ventured out into the heart of downtown, completely on your own, defenseless except for the measly, very sad pepper spray you keep in that worn purse of yours – both of which he keeps pleading with you to let him replace.

(He’ll get you new pepper spray and a taser and a pocketknife, just because he knows how dangerous these streets can be, and with your pretty face and your pretty body he’s sure villains would be lining out the door to get a taste of you. And of course, the new bag – he’s bought you plenty, in a wide variety of styles and colors, each gift getting more and more desperate to be the one you finally deem as being good enough to use, but alas.)

Enji doesn’t even bother with a greeting, instead stepping up to the counter, slamming down his credit card and stepping in front of you. I’ll be paying for her sweets. His voice is cold, firm, and sends the clerk into a scurry to process the transaction, meanwhile you’re staring in mild shock from behind the hero.

Of course you’re not surprised – how can you be, when he insists on spoiling you in every possible way? And yet the raw animosity he’s radiating right now can’t be ignored – you get the feeling as if you’re somehow in trouble, though you can’t figure out what for. As soon as the card reader beeps, Enji’s scooping up the card and your sweets, his thick fingers wrapping around your wrist just barely too tightly and marching out the door, telling the clerk over his shoulder to keep the receipt.

It takes every bone in his body to not turn back around and swing at the man behind the counter, his eyes shutting tightly in concentration as he tells himself that it’s not worth it, the media will find out, your reputation will be damaged. But as his eyes peel open and he realizes the way you’re squirming in his grip, he only sighs and releases you, those teal eyes of his appraising you with a frown.

You’re feeling guilty again, unsure of yourself as you gently rub your wrist, and for a moment Enji feels regret – did he hurt you? He hadn’t meant to, he’d just been angry and it was already hard enough to not harm the man who’d made you laugh, and surely you’d understand that he didn’t mean to –

You break the silence before he can voice his concerns, clearing your throat and thanking him in a meek voice. Enji merely nods, a small grunt your only response as he begins walking again, your sweets – and your purse – firmly in his hands, just so that you won’t have to carry them.

When you don’t immediately follow him, Enji pauses, looking back over his shoulder with a brow cocked.

What? Follow me – we have dinner reservations this evening, at that new seafood restaurant by the harbor. Fuyumi tells me it’s quite good; order the crab legs and the caviar.

There’s no room for disagreement in his tone, and for a moment you just blankly gape at him, the situation too strange for you to really process.

But all too soon his eyes are narrowing, and you’re practically tripping over your feet to follow him, keeping your gaze cast downwards as Enji’s hand rests on the small of your back, guiding you even though there’s not a civilian in sight on the desolated sidewalk he leads you down.

TAKING HIS DARLING AWAY:

Honestly, Enji is complicated as a yandere; there’s a part of him that knows that there are aspects of his relationship with you that mirror that of his previous marriage. He knows that although you may not be treated as terribly (and that you have more purpose to him than simply an incubator), you’re still trapped, essentially a slave to his will.

And yet, as time passes and his dependence on you grows stronger, he can’t help but justify his actions, deciding that yes, you may be stuck with him, but at least he spoils you rotten with your favorite foods, expensive clothing and jewels, an unlimited supply for each and every hobby you may have. He may have you trapped between a rock and a hard place in terms of leaving him, but at least he genuinely loves you - he aches to spend time with you, to hold you in his arms, to feel your heartbeat against his ear, your lips against his, your body writhing below his.

He’s convinced himself that this time is different, that you’re different, and as such he eventually decides that it’s really in both your best interests to just relocate you, to get you officially by his side. It’s really paranoia that drives this decision – he’s a working hero and a man with many, many enemies, and so it’s really the only option that keeps you safe.

Stealing you away into his private home – he’s the sole inhabitant, aside from a cleaner or two, since moving out of the Todoroki household – is the best option for a multitude of different reasons. You’re safer this way – the state-of-the-art security systems he’s installed around the estate are the best money can pay for, able to detect intruders and any suspicious activity in the blink of an eye. Enemies don’t have much of a chance of getting inside, and even if they had managed to, Enji will be right there to burn them to a crisp for even daring to get close to his beloved.

And even aside from outside threats, keeping you trapped at home will allow him to keep an eye on you and make sure that you don’t accidentally hurt yourself – you’re ridiculously clumsy to him, your every action having him hold his breath slightly in anticipation, in fear that you’ll somehow trip or fall or bruise your pretty skin. Plus, this way he’ll know that you’re eating healthily and in the right quantities, that you’re getting proper exercise, that you’re relaxing as you should, that you’re spending adequate amounts of time in the interior courtyard he’d prepared in preparation for you.

(It’s beautiful, as loathe as you are to admit it – all kinds of flowers bloom along the walkways, bamboo and tall grasses and trees growing in neat lines and providing shade for the flowerbeds on hot summer days. There’s even a small stream flowing through it, the gentle trickling noise almost enough to cancel out the painful silence that exists between you and Enji when he decides to join you for your scheduled garden time in the afternoons – uninvited, as always, and yet still unable to sense how desperately you wish you’d get these times alone to yourself.)

Aside from your safety, keeping you in his home helps feeds into his domestic fantasies of the two of you – you’re so very precious to him, and from nearly the beginning of his obsession with you, he’s always viewed you as the perfect wife – specifically, the perfect housewife.

He’s a traditional man, believing in traditional gender roles, and although he doesn’t view you as being less-than based upon your status as a woman, he does expect certain things from you. He’s the breadwinner, the strong, capable one who provides you with a roof over your head, food, and any gift under the sun the moment you make even the slightest inclination of wanting it.

And in return, you’re to be his caring, nurturing wife – the one who keeps the house neat and tidy, a room dedicated to only cleaning supplies that you get always stay stocked and ready for you, should you become inspired and wish to fulfill this domestic fantasy of his. The cleaning products are all diluted down to a level that wouldn’t be dangerous if you were to ingest them – you’d get sick, surely, but it’s nothing a home-trip from a doctor who’s been sworn to secrecy can’t handle.

There’s also, unfortunately, a drawer within the room that a particularly bored you had one day opened only to immediately slam it shut. Dozens of cleaning outfits sat neatly folded in the drawer, the black and white getups looking much too tight and much too short. A few weeks later you’d returned to the drawer, bored out of your mind while Enji was away at work, peeling one out with careful and trembling fingers. And of course, to no one’s surprise, the outfit fit like a fucking glove – hugging your curves and accentuating them, the skirt full and flouncy and very easy to flip up, the bustline practically choking your breasts with how tightly the black cotton pressed them together. You’d changed out of it shortly after, the rather disturbing and shameful fleeting question of whether this was the type of thing Enji liked making you too disgusted, guilty, and bashful to really consider.

In his idealized domestic world, you’d cook for him, too, but it takes a very long time for him to trust you enough to not purposefully burn or cut yourself in the kitchen. He has daydreams about coming home from a hectic work day to see you standing over the stove in a cute apron, humming some song and lighting up when you hear the door open and close, his announcement of being home making you practically bounce on your heels.

He wants to have you cook for him, to see you slave in the kitchen putting every ounce of your concentration and time into making him a meal you know he’ll enjoy, but that fantasy has to wait for the time being – just until he thinks you’ve finally lost that rebellious streak of yours, just until you finally come to realize that you belong by Enji’s side.

And so, in the meantime he’ll have you make him small things that hold little potential for you to hurt yourself with – simple sandwiches with pre-sliced ingredients, so that you won’t cut yourself chopping tomatoes or slicing bread. He'll have you prepare a sandwich for him and one for yourself, too, ordering you to sit down at the dining table with him and share a meal – though the conversation is hard to come by, and each attempt he makes at starting it is only met with single word answers from you.

(Another domestic fantasy he harbors but would never tell you about is to have you sitting with him at the table, looking at him with those pretty eyes and your voice dropping to a sultry volume, your chopsticks bringing the food you diligently and loving prepared for him up to his lips, your tone teasing as you tell him to open wide! He’d keep eye contact the whole time he chews, never once breaking it as he tells you in that low, gruff voice of his that it’s perfectly done, the seasoning is impeccable. He wants you to be bashful, to smile and hide it with your hand, your lashes fluttering as you glance at him then back to the food again, too shy to say much but your body language showing just how much his praise effects you, just how good it feels to be the center of his attention, the apple of his eye, his absolute everything.)

He wants you to be his sweet housewife, and although he won’t force you into any of the work, it’s extremely obvious what he wants of you – he’s always telling you about when you get adjusted, how you’ll be more open to fulfilling your role.

When you’re more adjusted, you’ll be happy to iron his clothes; perhaps you’ll spritz a bit of the perfume he buys you onto his shirts, just as a reminder of you during his long days.

(As if he needs a reminder – certainly not, when you’re on his mind nearly every minute of the day.)

When you’re more adjusted, you’ll be pleased to see the positive pregnancy test in your trembling hands, your voice riddled with joy as you announce the good news to him, watching him drop the phone and keys in his hand and instead hoist you into the air, spinning you with a grin on his face so bright it nearly blinds you, concluded with a passionate kiss and a few tears on his cheeks because he just can’t fucking wait to have you as the mother of his child.

It’s all this talk of ‘when this’ and ‘when that’, but the strange thing about Enji as a captor is that he’s incredibly patient with seeing these fantasies come to fruition – sure, he may be forcing you into being a housewife just as he did with Rei, but this is different – you get a choice about some of it, unlike her. You don’t have to do the dishes, but you can if you’d like. You don’t have to bear his children, but you can if you’d like.

(And frankly, it’ll be hard not to – once your need for human contact and your strange, mixed feelings for him grow, you’ll eventually give into his requests for intimacy, and once the floodgates are open, you will end up pregnant from the sheer frequency and volume at which he pumps you full of his cum.)

All that being said, life as Enji’s captive will honestly not be too terrible – he’s still following you around the house like a shadow, but he’ll let you sleep in your own bed at the start, let you have your own bedroom and bathroom, and he won’t even force you into spending time with him at the beginning.

Because really, as tortuous and painful as keeping you away from him is, he repeats the mantra over and over in his head that eventually it’ll be worth it – eventually you’ll see things his way, and eventually you’ll come to see just how deeply his feelings for you run. You’ll realize that he’s only ever loved you, that he cares for you more than any other man possibly could, that he only has your best interests at heart – that’s why he always swung by your apartment at the end of his patrols, peering in at you through your windows, just to make sure you were safe and sound.

That’s why he kidnapped you, to ensure your safety and keep you in the arms of the only man truly capable of providing for you, just as you deserve.

That’s why he’ll never let you escape him, no matter how you beg and plead for your freedom – you don’t understand the outside world like he does. You think you do, but each villain he arrests is a nail in the coffin of your freedom – you have no fucking clue how dangerous the world is, and Enji isn’t hesitant to remind you of this.

You’re unhappy with him? Well, your options are here, in his warm house where he’s willing to give you every ounce of his attention, love, and touch, or out in the big, scary world where women like you are easy targets for men who love destroying easy targets.

So really, you’re in the best hands with Enji – he knows how to take care of you, and he’ll spoil you with every possible treasure you could want. What’s not to be happy about?

PUNISHMENTS:

As a general rule, Enji doesn’t ‘do’ punishments. Because he views his relationship with you as his second try at finding a companion, there is no part of him that actively desires to hurt you. He loves you, in some sick, twisted way that’s much too obsessive and desperate to ever be considered healthy, but it’s still love nonetheless.

And as such, Enji does genuinely want your relationship to be as wholesome and sweet as possible; he wants you to want him, to actively choose to spend your time with him, to want to be in his presence every moment of every day. He wants everything to be as perfect as possible – the idealized life, a life where he’s the number one hero coming home to his lovely wife who cherishes him and he cherishes in return.

And so, when you do something that doesn’t quite line up with this fantasy, Enji is understandably upset. Why can’t you just accept that this is your reality now? Why do you insist on fighting him, even when you know you won’t win? How could you?

He’s Enji Todoroki, Endeavor the Flame Hero, and you’re just you. You’re pretty, of course, and smart and sweet and caring, but you’re still just you. There’s nothing you can do against someone like him – which is why Enji is able to excuse your poor behavior most of the time.

He understands; it’s difficult to accept that you’re weak and powerless, and he understands that when you lash out and act out, you’re just expressing frustration and fear at being taken care of so wholly and completely by someone so much stronger than you. It must be scary, after all – Enji can be so intimidating and he knows it, so he’ll try his absolute best to calm down anytime his anger starts to flare.

The last thing he wants to do is harm you, and he wants everything in your relationship to be as different as possible from that with Rei – and hurting you in any way would too closely resemble his previous marriage, ruining the beautiful illusion he can live under with you.

And so, most of the time Enji is able to grit his teeth and shut his eyes, letting the anger subside by telling himself about all the wonderful things about you – things that always get him feeling calmer, that make the buzzing sensation in his head and the suffocating feeling of anger dissipate. Nine times out of ten, he’s able to calm himself down this way – and if that’s not enough, normally exiting the room and getting a breath of fresh air is enough. He’ll tell himself that he absolutely cannot fall into the same habits he did with Rei – you’re different, you’re special, and he’ll calm himself down as often as he needs to in order to avoid being seen by you as the big, scary man who will hurt you if you disobey him.

Thus, getting Enji angry enough to the point where he can’t simply calm himself down is actually quite difficult – generally, this involves you hurting yourself. Most other things he can twist into seeming not so bad, rather just being you not having adjusted to life as his woman quite yet. He can write off your escape attempts as you still clinging to this ludicrous sense of independence you seem so hellbent on keeping.

Attempts to harm him can be discarded as your misplaced sense of anger at your situation, because although in your heart of hearts he’s sure you’re happy to be in your natural familial setting (as the wife of a strong, capable man of course), you’ve confused yourself by trying to reject something that’s just so right.

Of course these events don’t make him happy, but they’re able to be disregarded – but when your blood is drawn by your own accord, even Enji can’t pretend this is something else. This is you purposefully trying to injure yourself, purposefully trying to show him that you aren’t happy, that you don’t want this – an idea that makes him panic, that sends his fists clenching, that gets him pacing and his mind racing as he tries to figure out how to set you straight without harming you. And so, Enji eventually decides that after he cleans up your injury, rather than simply hitting you

and physically showing you that he won’t stand for this sort of misbehavior, he has to be more restrictive with you. He won’t be so lenient for the days following your bad behavior – you won’t be so spoiled, your rights won’t be so freely handed to you.

You must understand that Enji is charge, and that he’s being generous and loving and kind by allowing you such free reign around your shared home. Really, he doesn’t need to be so generous – and he’ll teach you that an angry Enji is much, much worse than the normal doting, lovesick Enji you’re used to.

Enji is frozen as he opens the front door. He’d come home a bit early from running some errands, the groceries in his hand dropping onto the hardwood floors below him. His jaw is dropped a bit, the sight of your bright red blood staining your forearm making a wave of sickness wash over him.

Who did this?

Who could’ve hurt you like this? There’d been no security alerts while he was gone, and there was absolutely no way that you’d left the interior of this house in the two hours he was gone. In the next breath he’s rushing forward into the kitchen, by your side before you can even blink, paying no mind to the way you gasp and stumble away from him, as if you’re afraid of him.

It makes Enji’s chest ache, but the sight of your blood is too distracting for him to focus on the uncomfortable ache. Instead, he’s thrusting your arm under the kitchen sink, the lukewarm water making you wince ever so slightly as it runs over the wound.

Enji’s brows furrow as he examines your arm; the cuts are long, zigzagging in every direction in a way that looks strange, not like any normal attack pattern he’s seen before. This doesn’t look natural, either – not like a regular scratch, not like you just slipped and fell and had unfortunate luck. No, this looks like something else entirely – like something purposeful, like their appearance marring your pretty skin isn’t accidental in the least. It’s only then that Enji sees the glinting silver fork out of the corner of his eye, sitting on the edge of the counter with a bit of red staining the ends.

Immediately his body is freezing, his grip on your arm squeezing tighter as the gears turn in his mind. You must have…

His jaw flexes as he grinds his teeth, those blue eyes of his slanting over to look at you with such intensity and anger that you physically shrink in on yourself. His grip is too firm for you to pull your arm back, Enji absolutely unwilling to let you run away from this.

Did you do this to yourself?

His voice is surprisingly even, given the look on his face, and immediately you’re shaking your head, your entirely body paralyzed with fear. You’ve never seen Enji look this scary before – or at least not towards you.

Your answer only serves to further anger him, it seems, because soon he’s literally snarling, his face twisted up into this ugly look of  rage that’s only heightened by the scar across his eye.

Don’t lie to me, I will always be able to tell when you’re untruthful with me. He pauses, taking a deep breath, his voice just the slightest bit unsteady. Did you do this to yourself?

This time you nod yes, tears prickling at your eyes and starting to spill down your cheeks, and at the sound Enji makes, they only flow faster. He looks like he’s in more pain than you are – his face is red, and a few flames lick up around his shoulders. The heat washes over you, and soon the begs are slipping off your tongue before you can help yourself.

Enji pays you no mind, every ounce of his self-control going towards not slapping you in the face for your blatant stupidity. Soon he’s letting go of your hand, stomping towards the small first aid kit he keeps in the kitchen, entirely silent as he carefully wraps your arm in bandages, not paying your rambling any attention or mind.

As soon as you’re securely bandaged, he leaves the room and you hear the sound of his bedroom door slamming shut reverberating throughout the house.

The rest of the night passes in a blur, with you somehow getting from the floor of the kitchen where you’d laid down and eventually fallen asleep all the way to your bed, with the blankets carefully slotted over your body.

Nothing seems to be amiss the next morning, your footsteps cautious as you approach the bathroom, your brows shooting up when you notice that the counter is completely bare – your toothbrush, toothpaste, floss, and mouthwash are all missing, as are all the expensive lotions and facial scrubs Enji normally keeps in piles for your convenience.

The kitchen is empty, too, you notice – the silverware drawer is completely empty, and there are no cups or mugs of any sort in any of the cupboards. It’s unnerving, and immediately you’re getting goosebumps all over your body, the air feeling prickly and cold, as if there’s something lurking that you don’t know about. Biting your lip, you make your way to the table, gingerly sitting down and trying not to jostle the bandages too much – the bandages that had been changed, you distantly notice.

A few minutes later, Enji joins you in the kitchen, his expression not exactly jovial, but not particularly hostile. He greets you as he normally does, before placing the mug you now notice is in his hand under sink. The sound of rushing water gets your mouth watering, not having realized how thirsty you were until this moment.

Wide eyes watch him turn towards you, making his way to your seated figure with slow, heavy steps that get your heart thudding in his chest. He stops right next to you, before telling you to open your mouth. Hesitantly, you do as he says, jerking slightly when his fingertips – always unnaturally warm – cup your chip and bring the cup up to your lips, the water cold as you’re forced to drink it.

Enji watches with neutral eyes, though you see the corner of his lip curl up slightly as you drink the entire glass, the pacing of the water flow nearly too much and nearly choking you. Soon it’s gone, and Enji uses his thumb to wipe at the corner of your lips.

Since yesterday’s little spectacle has shown me that you can’t be trusted with basic household supplies, let me know if you require another drink, if you’d like to brush your teeth, or if you’d like to wash your hair. You obviously can’t do it alone, so I will be joining you. Now, go lay down on the couch. I need to change your wrappings again.

You’re dumbfounded, watching him keep the mug in his grasp as he heads towards the living room. And though the threat seems too extreme, Enji means it – you only last a few hours before you reluctantly ask for another drink, your throat too dry and sore to go without it.

And that night, when you shamefully ask him for your toothbrush, you’re not particularly pleased to find out that he’ll be the one brushing your teeth, using his very own toothbrush to get the job done, just to make sure you don’t even think about trying to choke yourself with the brush.

(And when you finally have to shower, well, Enji’s face turns bright red when you ask, rushing to his feet much too quickly, grasping your hand and practically pulling you to the bathroom before applying all sorts of soaps and scents to the bath he draws for you. His breath is hitched as he turns around so you can change in privacy, but don’t be surprised to see him sneaking glances at your bare body beneath the water’s bubbly surface. Don’t be surprised when later that night you hear a suspiciously rhythmic thumping sound and muffled groans through the wall that  your bedrooms share, the faintest wet, squelching noise accompanying them.)

And, roughly a week later when you wake up to the cups and mugs back in the cupboard and your shampoo back in the shower, you’ll decide against hurting yourself anytime soon. It’s not worth it – not if that’s how you’ll be treated; forced to ask permission for your basic needs.

And Enji couldn’t be more pleased – now you’ll think twice about using that fork again, or anything else for that matter.

(And he can still force you into using his toothbrush – under the guise of furthering your bond and intimacy, of course. And because he’ll use it after you, savoring the feeling of the bristles against his tongue like some sort of drug.)

OVERALL DANGER:

 7/10

Enji isn’t necessarily dangerous, but rather inevitable.

He’s a determined man, driven by motivation for his goals, no matter the methods he uses to get there. And once he sets his sights on you, deciding that he wants you, that he loves you, you’re certainly no different – he will have you, and there’s not a single thing you can do about it. He’s a force to be reckoned with, and really, what sway do you have?

He’s a professional hero, known in the public sphere responsible for saving more lives than you could ever hope to, and who are you? You’re just a pretty face, a woman who happened to have the exact set of traits and physical appearance that Enji finds desirable – you have no real way to combat him, and who would believe you, anyway? Enji is the new symbol of peace – as far as the Commission is concerned, he can have whatever the hell he wants, and if that one thing is some civilian, then you can kiss your freedom goodbye.

But really, all things considered, Enji isn’t too terrible – he’s trying desperately to right his wrongs, to love you in a way that prioritizes your happiness and is just better, and although you’re certainly not happy being trapped by his side, he can at least pretend like this is better.

He wants you to be his pretty little thing, to be his housewife and treat him like your devoted, loving husband. He wants you to greet him with a kiss on the lips when he comes home from work, helping him out of his jacket and asking about his day, then lead him into the clean kitchen where you’ve got dinner waiting for him, then join him in the shower and then the bed, letting his hands wander to where they please, then fall asleep on his chest, letting him feel like he’s protecting you even in his sleep.

Is that really so much to ask for? Enji thinks not – besides, isn’t that the dream for you?

All you have to do is let him take care of you, to spoil you with flowers and chocolates and jewelry and all sorts of things that make women swoon. You’ll be spoiled rotten, treated like a goddess, and all you have to do is let Enji make all the decisions for you, to let him take control of your life and your future – it’s better this way, he promises.

This way, you’ll be properly cared for, kept safe and secure and comfortable by his side. You may not see it yet, but Enji is sure this is really what you want – you’ll come around eventually, he’s sure of it.

And if you don’t? Well, at least he’s not a monster, right?

[sugar-grigri]

Crazy theory, but since I don't really read them, I don't know if it's ever been mentioned before.

I've already talked about this urge to discover the demon of death. So much so that fans see them in every new character introduced.

We know that Pochita punctuates both the birth and death of demons with his chainsaws.

I've always been surprised by the way Pochita calmly took hold of Makima, allowing Denji to knowingly save her by recommending that he give her love

Just as I'm surprised by Fami's interest in separating Chainsaw Man just as Yoru is stubbornly intent on revenge

How can these three horsemen of the apocalypse have so much interest and connection with a single demon?

We already know that Fujimoto has opted for the metaphorical, choosing the instrument designed for childbirth: the chainsaw, as the keystone of his story.

Chainsaw Man is intrinsically linked to birth and death

Denji's rebirth alone is linked to death having been cut up as well as Pochita?

Demons are born out of fear of one thing, so I know it might be strange that Pochita, representing chainsaws, represents death and isn't the chainsaw demon.

But two things: firstly, the impostor is actually the real chainsaw demon.

Fujimoto likes to undo our first impressions, so I find it absolutely INCREDIBLE that Denji should be the impostor from the start, the false Chainsaw Man in a part 2 that focuses on identity.

Secondly, how can simple chainsaws have so much power? I mean, sure, they're scary, but how can they have so much power as to be able to wipe out demons? Why should it be the chainsaw demon who's capable of this, and death remains crouched in the shadows?

This would also explain his promiscuity with the other Knights of the Apocalypse.

The demon of control wanted to play with Pochita - death was the only thing she couldn't totally control, the only thing she aspired to be on an equal footing with.

If Pochita understood her so well, it was as the fourth knight of the apocalypse. If Makima considered him her equal, it was because she couldn't control a demon she knew to be of her own rank. The logic follows with Nayuta.

The demon of war doesn't accept death, it accepts to spread it through conflicts and weapons of mass murder, but a general doesn't accept that death can touch him too. To spread death represents victory, to be touched by it a defeat that demands vengeance.

Famine works hand in hand with death, and is feared because suffering and death are the end result of not being able to eat. She's the one with the clearest goal at the moment: to save humanity. She doesn't hesitate to recruit her fellow Apocalypse members, whether it's proposing it to Nayuta, trying to recruit Asa and Yoru, or splitting Chainsaw Man in two to work with the pure state of the death demon.

The public hunters' aim is also to protect mankind from Nostradamus' prophecy, but by paralyzing death's actions as much as possible. They exploit Denji's flaws and desire to be normal to the full, threatening those around him. While the church, represented by Fami, titillates Denji's heroic side, his abnormalities, they want death to act.

It would also explain why everyone close to Denji is disappearing.

All the signs are pointing to Asa's imminent atrocity.

Wouldn't it be incredible to think that it's because death is in Denji's belly ?

Everything would then make sense: it's normal for Denji's development to stagnate, and for him to go through so many existential crises.

He doesn't know his own identity

What's more, it doesn't contradict my most meta theories: Fujimoto places himself in the work through Denji (cf. chapter 133), just as he responds directly to his fans (chapters 136 and 137).

We're all hating him, seeing all our favorite characters meet unfortunate deaths

It would all make sense if the manga we were holding in our hands, "Chainsaw Man", actually referred directly to death right from the start.

It would all make sense if we saw Part 1 as Denji's introduction to the ranks of hunters governed by an early death.

It would make sense for Aki's love for him to be a metaphor for accepting death, in the continuity of mourning.

It would make sense for Power to be reassured by Death when traumatized by the demon of darkness: she died twice for love, and the total disappearance of body and spirit allows us to escape the darkness.

I don't know if this theory holds, but let's agree...

It's poetic

[butterflydm]

WoT rewatch (2x03-2x04)

Spoilers through what we know about s3 so far. And only show spoilers, actually. Not sure how I managed that.

2x03

Our big Nynaeve focal episode, though it does still continue and follow through on the other major plotlines for other characters, it's just that Nynaeve gets the majority of the time.

Leane, Liandrin, & Sheriam are the ones witnessing Nynaeve's Accepted Test.

We know that Liandrin is Black Ajah, of course, and I imagine her suggesting Nynaeve so early for the Test was not only to be allowed to teach her but also to traumatize her to make it easier to push her towards the Shadow. Because that's Ishy's goal with all five ta'veren - push them towards the Shadow. I do wonder if the reason he swaps to having Liandrin give Nynaeve to the Seanchan instead is because Lanfear's actions over in the Rand-Moiraine storyline have forced him to advance his plans. Because Lanfear doesn't really care about the other ta'veren at this point, at least that we see in s2 - she only cares about Rand.

I like that we heard about Nynaeve's backstory in s1 and now get to watch it play out.

"Remember, Red is dead." She's afraid of becoming like Liandrin.

This moment between Nynaeve and Test-Tam is so heartbreaking. Him asking after Rand and Nynaeve lying so that she won't break a dying man's heart, and then being forced to leave him there in pain.

And no Elayne around when Nynaeve & Test-Egwene say goodbye because they've literally never met (though she maybe heard her voice through the door).

The whole Romantic Lan riding in on a horse reminds me of what Adelas speculated about Lan & Moiraine's first meeting before she heard the true story.

The sleeves of Nynaeve's coat have really nice embroidery here.

Liandrin is probably thinking partly about Nynaeve here (she does have fondness for Nynaeve at this point) but also about how Ishy will not be happy with her, since he doesn't want the ta'veren dead.

Everything about the Seanchan remains chilling. We do see this particular damane (who can sense women who can channel) on one of the ships that explodes at the end, I believe.

Uno's death works on so many narrative levels, even before we learn at the end of the season that he's one of the Heroes - it's true to his established character and it shows how ruthless the Seanchan are. The added benefit of him being a Hero is that it sets up the Heroes as morally opposed to the Seanchan (especially those being led by the Shadow, but Suroth isn't doing anything here that the non-Shadow Seanchan wouldn't also do at this point, which is a very important point. Suroth moved faster and extended their reach more than Turok was prepared to do, and gets in trouble for it, but her actual methods are Empire-sanctioned from everything that we see on screen and it's important to note that, I feel).

I love Logain forcing Rand into a pointless fetch quest just to test what he's willing to do. Also, given what we know they changed about how women can sense channeling (it's a Talent not everyone has), I think they also gave that Talent to Logain, but for men. The Searcher damane may be seeing a similar glow to what Logain describes.

Oh look, a gleeman talking about the Horn of Valere, that summons the Heroes from the dead to fight for the Light, and then Rand asks Lanfear about it! The Horn gets talked about more in the party scene later too.

Now that we aren't in Nynaeve's Test-world, Elayne exists again!

I tease but this is a very heartbreaking scene. Poor Egwene. Mat stays behind. Rand sacrifices himself, and now she's being told that Nynaeve is dead.

Sheriam sucks at grief-counseling. I mean, it's clear she's not even really trying.

I wonder if Liandrin got told off by Ishy for losing Nynaeve, because it does feel like the plans for Mat accelerated abruptly, like maybe Liandrin is no longer trusted to break Mat to be ready for the dagger/Ishy.

Ugh, but she does fuck with his head hard before she kicks him out.

"A stupid desperate boy who wallows in self-pity, blaming his friends for leaving him."

Egwene & Liandrin's confrontation here is great.

"We Aes Sedai can only speak the truth, so listen to me." You liiiiiar!

Also Liandrin/the Shadow did NOT have Egwene's number correctly lol. Though I guess Liandrin has a better idea now.

Lanfear is loving getting all this attention being the woman on Rand's arm and getting all up in her fantasy world. I like that we meet Anveare here before we find out she's Moiraine's sister.

And Rand gets his first lesson in how politics work (and hates it).

Lanfear is so miffed that Rand isn't sharing everything with her. And miffed about him getting suspicious of 'Selene's' motives in helping him (which explains why she pushes so hard in his dreams later).

I love saidar being represented by water and now Logain using wine as the metaphor for saidin. Also, man, the queer metaphor that feels like it's pushing at the seams of this scene. Especially since it's followed up by still-in-denial Rand hooking up with Selene/Lanfear in the dream she creates for him.

I wonder if Logain actually IS genetically related to LTT (as he claims here). The lore is that the Dragon killed his entire bloodline but... yeah, idk. We know that reincarnation is not related to bloodline but there is a genetic element to channeling.

Mat not able to summon up his courage to go talk to Egwene because he's been fed poison for months that's convinced him she wouldn't want him around. 😭

Min-Mat romance shot down again.

Ishy looks a bit weary here at the start. Maybe because he thinks one of his ta'veren is dead/lost in the Arches?

Ishy doing his best to make Perrin believe that the wolf stuff is directly tied to the Shadow. And Perrin is the first of the ta'veren to learn that Rand didn't actually defeat the Dark One at the Eye last season, so now he thinks Rand died for nothing.

And now Elyas frees Perrin & only Perrin. He's no Darkfriend but he's narrowed down his list of those he cares about to wolf and wolf-related persons only.

And we learn about double-agent Min here.

Selene's inner Lanfear really jumping out in his most recent dream. And she is engaging hard in her LTT fantasies, plus pushing him to channel (and do something destructive because of his lack of control). This seems like something she did impulsively because she was mad at Rand for walking out on her earlier, so I think burning down the inn was not in her original plans.

Elayne's knowledge of White Tower history giving her a base of knowledge, and we see her show so much compassion to Egwene here. Such a good egg. 💜

Nynaeve putting Perrin & Mat into her happy fantasy world, and imagining Mat in such a loving way, giving him freedom over his life but a home base to return to as well. I do think that Nynaeve's world here is pure fantasy from her head and not an alternate reality because everything here is based on what Nynaeve knew and believed as of when she went into the Arches, rather than reflecting the whole world as it would exist, including what she didn't know at the time (aka Rand being alive).

So traumatic for our poor Nynaeve.

She had to know she couldn't actually bring her daughter through, but she couldn't not try.

2x04

Our big reveal episode for Lanfear. It does kinda crack me up that breaking out Lanfear was so epic and then he does the rest off-screen.

I do wonder what circumstances led to Lanfear being covered in blood when she was sealed up, because there did not seem to be blood involved when LTT & co sealed up Ishy in the 2x08 flashback. What was Lanfear up to when she was caught?

I really enjoy all the compare & contrast of the ways that having a channeler in the family can affect the family dynamic, depending on the families involved.

Oh hey chamberpot under the bed, just noticed that. Also poor Nynaeve and her PTSD from the Test. She looks so hollowed out.

Alanna's home seems so nice. ❤️

So Lan is on suicide watch, which he assures Alanna is not needed. Lan takes a moment to process what Alanna says about "your bond wasn't ripped from you, she took it." Given his reaction here, I think this might be the first time this belief of Alanna's has been directly mentioned to him (and she assumes this probably because of the conversation that she and Moiraine had about releasing the bond back in s1).

I think he's taking the opportunity to mine Alanna for information about Moiraine.

While Alanna spends time with her family, Moiraine avoids hers.

Okay, I feel like Barnathas was probably key to Lanfear's plans for Rand but Moiraine moved more quickly than anticipated. And we know that Rand was keeping his plans re: Logain away from 'Selene' (and she was very annoyed about it), so getting some info from Logain helped inadvertently ruin whatever specific plan Lanfear had originally envisioned here.

Going from Lan to Logain really does show us the difference in their mental states pretty clearly.

Egwene's mention of Rand here to Elayne is so nonspecific (someone I love more than anything) and I continue to be very curious how that whole situation will be handled in s3. I assume that Elayne knows by the time of 3x01 about Randgwene, since they were all traveling together for a month.

The wolf visions! I like that the wolves are just, like, sending vibes instead of talking.

Perrin also learns that he's been unintentionally sending his dreams to all the wolves. Very awkward for Perrin.

Hopper sharing his name. ❤️

So yeah, I think Lan is playing into Alanna & co's assumptions here while he bids his time to try to figure out what Moiraine is up to. He's being agreeable.

My current feeling about the bond is that Lan & Moiraine are just incredibly dramatic people and that's why we got the big rebonding scene in 2x08. Like renewing wedding vows. You were already married, you just wanted to recommit. I will continue to keep an eye on what Lan says or implies in the future, but I think it might just be masked this whole time.

Okay, my 2x03 theory about Liandrin is definitely out - I think the accelerated Seanchan kidnapping schedule is down to Liandrin needing to tell Ishy that she lost Nynaeve and then walking it back the next day (I'm assuming via dreams). Ishy doesn't trust her to do the job anymore and hands her task to Suroth, who is more directly under his nose. The timing doesn't work for it to be related to Rand & Lanfear's plotline.

Before the Test, Liandrin was acting like she had all the time in the world to train Nynaeve & mess with Mat's head. Nynaeve goes missing in the Arches and it's suddenly time to immediately toss Mat out on his ear, and then Nynaeve gets hustled off to the Seanchan basically as soon as possible after she comes back.

I think Lanfear keeps pushing the past love angle because she's trying to find LTT in Rand. But instead he just gets a little jealous (over himself lol).

Cute & casual Mat. ❤️

"I'm tired. I can't move."

So cute. Min doesn't appreciate it, but I do!

I do love the theme in this episode of the "Aes Sedai" curse, as Liandrin puts it, of watching their loved ones grow old & die while they stay young.

"The triumph of the Light over the Dark. And dessert after."

Worthy goals!

Anveare successfully blackmailing her big sister into spending time with her - good for her tbh. The family dynamics in this episode are so good. I do think this is what Lanfear would have failed to predict, yeah. Anveare and Logain are both pieces of the puzzle that led Moiraine to ruin Lanfear's big night with Rand.

Both Elayne & Rand talk in this episode about not getting to choose their own fate. Babies!

So Liandrin didn't seem surprised to see Egwene but Elayne is "a complication". It makes sense that she would assume that Egwene would come along with Nynaeve after that confrontation that she & Egwene had while Nynaeve was presumed dead. Elayne really IS a complication, considering how politically important she is.

Min actually struggling with her viewings instead of any struggle just being in her backstory: love it.

So... is Ishy trying to interrupt Lanfear's plans because he feels like she's getting too entrenched or does he have another motive for sending Mat to Cairhien? (secret Cauthor shipper Ishy)

This ploy of Lanfear's was really a very clever way to break through some of Rand's remaining emotional walls towards her. He gets to be her hero and then she gets that confession out of him that she wants so badly when she starts withholding herself from him due to her 'fear' over his 'madness'.

"You are the first woman who's ever seen me as a man. I didn't want you to see me as a monster."

I kinda broke this down as we were going along but: yeah, I really see it, how Rand's love for Egwene is tied to his boyhood and his dreams of a life in the Two Rivers. Egwene's first official act as a woman was to break up with Rand. For Egwene, I don't think that would at all stick out in her memory as A Big Thing, but it makes sense that it would for Rand. Especially since he had to let go of that dream of living with her in the Two Rivers as part of breaking out of Ishy's fake world in 1x08.

And now 'Selene' gets to be accepting of his nature (hoping it will lead to him accepting the truth of who/what she is).

It kinda sucks that Lanfear's romance advice here is actually quite good, because Rand now has a lot of reason not to trust it.

I really do not think this confession was actually gonna get Lanfear positive results even if Moiraine hadn't arrived when she did. Rand is already starting to freak out, even before the throat-slitting and all the blood.

But I guess that's why she tied Rand up. Insurance policy. Lanfear does believe in insurance policies. I'm gonna remember that for s3.

Poor Rand. What a devastating revelation.

[doogieverse]

Sonic Classpects <3

I designed them to be a twelve player session because I thought that was more fun :-) I didn't necessarily keep gender specific classes/aspects in mind. Do, however, keep in mind that classpects aren't always a one-to-one with characters' personalities. Sometimes, they're roles that they have to come into, or accept.

Also, if anyone draws them in their godtier outfits I will be eternally grateful. Sonic: Heir of Hope Sonic is a symbol of hope; whether he realizes it or not, his actions carry weight. That means that although overall he inspires a positive change— bringing hope to others— if he makes a mistake, it brings despair instead. In this regard, Sonic is hope personified.

Tails: Mage of Light Tails uses knowledge as a weapon, sometimes to his detriment. He's often given seemingly impossible quests, with not much time to complete them. You could argue that he's cursed to be the brains in a team full of brawns. That being said, he seeks out knowledge like a moth drawn to a flame; he lives off of it.

Knuckles: Knight of Rage Knuckles's entire purpose is to protect and serve, both his friends and Angel Island. However, rather than being a level-headed knight archetype, Knuckles is a hot-headed warrior, thinking with his fists, rather than his brain. This leads him to have a bit of an anger problem, which can also bring rage to those around him.

Amy: Sylph of Heart Amy is self-absorbed, only in the sense that she believes that what is in her heart is always right. Apart from that, she looks to heal the heavy hearts of those around her, even animals, and complete strangers. She is caring and giving at her best, and volatile and clingy at her worst.

Metal Sonic: Page of Doom Metal Sonic was built to be a harbinger of doom, and continues to do so of his own volition. He has great potential, but is held back by his own insecurities— which can mean he was programmed with limitations, or that he has a more human side that conflicts with his programming. Because of this, he becomes doomed himself, in an infinite cycle of being destroyed and rebuilt.

Shadow: Prince of Blood Shadow is driven by his bonds, whether it's to his friends or enemies, and those in the past or those in the future. He uses these relationships as excuses to wreak havoc. Therefore, he can be seen as selfish, whether his cause is noble or not. In truth, Shadow is more stubborn than anything. Though he defines himself by his relationships, he is often misunderstood.

Rouge: Thief of Space Rouge is incredibly patient and adaptable, traits that are imparative for a jewel thief. Her passion is taking things for herself, which may be egocentric by nature, she is known to have good intentions. She is naturally confident when it comes to her abilities, and isn't above using her feminine charm to accomplish her goals.

Blaze: Maid of Mind Blaze is calm and collected, weighing the multitude of options before acting. She also has this effect on others as well, getting them to see her reasoning. She is often rigid, as she's used to making the tough decisions, and carries that burden with responsibility. However, hardships can cause her to act out of character, being paralyzed by choice, or leaving her fiery temper to take over.

Silver: Witch of Time. Silver has been known to manipulate time, both figuratively and literally. While he can time travel with ease, he also has an unwillingness to take things as they are. That being said, he also has a tendency to end up in difficult and dreary situations. He's constantly stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Vector: Rogue of Breath Vector may be a detective, but he doesn't play by the book. He lives as he pleases, being able to slip into the role of leader, bodyguard, comedic relief, etc. However, this can make him hard to pin down. As a detective, he takes others' autonomy by bringing them to justice. This not only helps feed him and his partners, but it also keeps the streets clean.

Espio: Bard of Void Espio is a stealthy character, at first glance, Able to become invisible, he's able to stealthily gain the upper hand on his opponent. However, he also has the innate desire to show off; he's cool and he wants others to know it, even if he acts nonchalant about it. In both ways he destroys void: either by filling it or filling its role.

Charmy: Seer of Life Charmy is the charisma and joy of Team Chaotix. He wants to bring life to his friends by being upbeat and having fun. Though he may be a naïve child, he's still attuned to others' feelings, and desires to empower them best he can. He isn't always great at it, sometimes coming off as annoying and overeager instead.

[verdantwyrm]

Swansea's monologue with Jimmy is so much deeper than people are willing to understand or accept, it is simply because even after accomplishing what he has, all of his achievements, all of the things that make him a "good man" it didn't bring him happiness, or any peace, and it probably never removed that image of his bloated corpse either.

It's why he laments on the fact that the happiest moments of his life was when he was at his lowest because no matter what he did, it never equated to the simplicity of your only problem in the whole world being an empty bottle. He had no responsibilities, and he was telling Jimmy directly to his face that responsibilities do not make you happy. He truly wanted to believe that he was never just one setback away from his worst self, but despite all of this, he found out that even having things like discipline, drive, routine, the endless desperation to get something done, anything done.

That all of the accomplishments he chased, his whole life, never felt as good as when he was at his lowest. He was ready to accept this, he probably had a long time ago, that his wife, his kids, his home, his future, and probably his career too, it didn't bring any peace or comfort. It didn't feel like it was enough, that when he finally got to that finish line, the feeling of completing something, achieving that goal, was not enough.

And so now that they were at their end, all about to die. He is asking Jimmy directly if it feels good. If all of this was worth it that feeling of accomplishment meant anything at all.

You can achieve everything you want in life, you can find all the pieces, and do all the right things, but it won't make you happy because those are not what makes someone happy. Someone like Swansea, someone like Jimmy.

Swansea was accepting this, he had long accepted it, and he was ready to face the "music" of reality, he has nothing else to hide, all had been laid bare and plain. He can see himself for who he is, and what he is. And all Jimmy does is consistently push away that idea of relief or satisfaction behind it, that he's nowhere near the end, that he can still fix it. So far in denial that it is the end. His cowardice, selfishness and victimisation of his own actions has deluded his sense of the end.

Swansea laments that if there was one thing he could have accomplished, possibly the only thing that could have brought him any peace, was to try and save Daisuke, but he couldn't even do that. There was nothing left for him. He failed and had accepted his failure.

Swansea confessed his sins, confessed his deeds. And all Jimmy does is lay in that denial, furthering the suffering of those around him and himself, so desperate to cling to the idea that he can and will fix it because it's all he has left and he can't even see his own faults because of that.

[hawke-from-kirkwall]

Solas. The Dread Wolf. He is an incredibly fascinating character to me. He has many names. His history is tangled and twisting with love, loyalty, pain, wisdom, betrayal, pride, power, fear, failure, regret- each part telling the story of a truly complex and nuanced person. In this Essay I will...

Something I find absolutely fascinating about Solas over the course of DAI and now DATV is that I feel you can see him struggle with the fact that at every turn his desperate belief that those around him are on some level not real people (a belief he holds on to with white knuckle fists because he knows he cannot complete his goal if he allows himself to see them as real) is challenged. Varric, Cole, Sera, Bull, Lavellan, or even an Inquisitor that's not Elvhen, Felessan, even to some extent Mythal, they directly challenge his view of them. He has to silence them or he won't be strong enough to continue his mission- he'd fail again. So he kills his closest friend, can't even look him in the eye when he does it, he breaks up with Lavellan (or distances himself from a friendly Inquisitor), and abandons the Inquisition without a word, even cuts himself off from Cole because Cole knew who he was and could reveal too much.

Solas cuts himself off from anyone and everything that could tear down his idea that they could be REAL, that they could deserve the same chance he and the other ancient elves had to live, or he knows he will abandon his work. He'd once again fail. And Solas fears he couldn't survive that.

So he forces himself to be detached, cold, calculating, deceptive, and strategic. He once again bears the mantle of Dread Wolf, once again the cost is never too high if it means the People are restored.

Solas fascinates me in his obstinate determination to not accept what he sees, and I believe he knows deep down, is true - his original plan succeeded, but the cost was great and that there is truly no way to reverse it. The world of Thedas, as it is now, completely changed from anything he ever wanted, is the result. But change is a part of life. It cannot be stopped. Fighting change or seeking to reverse change only serves to change things further and never in the way you had planned. Ultimately, Solas's plan was doomed from the start- he could succeed in pulling down the veil, he could "minimize the damage", but the world that would result from it would still not be the world he wants. It would still be subject to the thousand years of change it had gone through and would change further still at the abrupt return of magic and spirits to the world. He cannot predict the outcome and consequences that would be the aftermath of his success. And he doesn't want to! He cannot reconcile his failure so he pushes forward to erase what cannot be erased. It's futile. And I don't believe he is fully blind to it. I am certain he knows, even if he refuses to sit with it long enough to admit it.

Solas is a broken man who's so focused on his one failure that the cost of "repair" doesn't matter. HE has to fix it. HE has to sacrifice. HE has to go it alone. Else he might be persuaded to change his mind, to do the selfish thing and move on, when the ancient elvhen no longer have that chance.

So he holds tight to his bitter resolve only to be challenged again at every turn by Rook and their team, old allies and friends, those he had betrayed. Again.

His story is one of pain, loss, regret, failure, twisted purpose and the incredible power of a small seed of hope.

If you choose this end, Solas finally removes his blinders to see the light of hope in front of him. With or without Lavellan taking the journey with him, Solas finally sees what he'd been so forcefully shoving out of his view - it just takes one choice. One right decision to start a journey towards redemption. He cannot be absolved of guilt for his actions. He cannot change the past. But perhaps with time he can redeem his future.

[Me, typing this up at 10am on a Tuesday... like a normal person. Lol]

[mrzombielover]

- slow ride ch1

feat. sinner!adam x fem!hotel worker!reader

series masterlist | next chapter

warnings: NSFW, enemies to fuckbuddies, adam and reader both suck, unhealthy relationships, size kink oooops, light degradation

a/n: oh my god this is so self indulgent. something is fr wrong with me bc all my favorite men are irrevocably fucked up and toxic and emotionally damaged and would treat me like shit teehee

wc: 2.2k

“You took my shame and you took my pride / And now you gonna take me for a slowride”

When even Charlie is trepidatious about checking someone in to the hotel, you know they’ve fucked up bad.

Adam had shown up, tail between his legs, admitting something about how he’s “desperate enough to try anything,” even this “stupid delusional humiliating hotel.”

Charlie, who’s more like an angel than Adam ever was, had ultimately decided that he could stay. After a lengthy and heated discussion, she’d reminded the group that the hotel’s policy states that everyone deserves a chance at redemption, regardless of the sins they’ve committed. Considering he killed your friend, you thought that was bullshit, but it’s Charlie’s hotel at the end of the day, and you’re just along for the ride.

You like Charlie, which is why you put up with having Adam around. She’s a good person- genuinely, deep down. There’s no hidden motives in her actions. You’ve not met many good people in your life, so she’s won your respect, even if you have your doubts about the hotel’s premise.

But for as much as you love her, you briefly questioned her sanity when she asked you to keep a special eye on Adam.

“…and how exactly is that the job of treasury secretary?” You deadpan.

“Wellll…” Charlie trails off, looking away for a moment. “It isn’t really. Buuut what if I was asking as a favor, for your friend?” She clasps her hands together, giving you a smile. You have to avert your eyes from the hopeful look on her face before your resolve cracks.

“No way in hell,” You say quickly.

“Please!”

“No,”

“Pleaseee!”

You bite your lip as you think. He’s obnoxious, yes, but what’s really the worst that could happen? You close your eyes and sigh.

“…you owe me one,”

You regret accepting every day. Nobody got along with Adam. Well, nobody except for Nifty, who seemed thrilled to have a real bad boy staying in the hotel. You, however, got along with him the least of all.

For someone who’d come to the hotel in his time of need- who was in no position to ask for anything other than forgiveness- Adam sure has a smartass mouth. It seems Charlie just wants to give you a brain aneurysm, that’s why she gave you this job. Even if that wasn’t her goal, that’s certainly the stage you’re approaching, because fighting with Adam everyday is 100% going to make you pop a blood vessel.

You can’t help it. Something about him- the way he acts, the forced proximity, just gets under your skin, makes your eye twitch. He should be groveling, begging for forgiveness, putting his heart and soul into bettering himself, yet all he does is bitch and moan. Constantly complaining would be one thing, hell’s full of whiners, but he also feels the need to voice every thought he’s ever had, which often includes insults and snide remarks about those around him. You’ve never been one to take that shit- though, nobody at the hotel really does. It seems to be much worse with you two, specifically, though.

The problem comes in because, as much as you hate to admit it, you might sometimes occasionally have some things in common with him. No, you’re not quite as loud or crude or obnoxious, you don’t generally insult people for fun, but if someone deserves it?

You’ve tore into people for way less than murdering your friend, showing up on your doorstep and being a pain in your ass 24/7, especially if you’re in a particularly shitty mood. Reduced people to tears for mildly inconveniencing you, having an annoying voice, wasting food, etc etc… all of which Adam does.

Generally, you’re apathetic to what goes on around you, especially at the hotel. You’re fed, don’t have to pay rent, and can pretty much do whatever you want, so dealing with the annoying, traumatized, dramatic residents and staff is a fair trade off in your eyes. Adam should, in theory, be no different than the rest of them to you. So you cannot, for the life of you, figure out what about him makes him so much worse than the rest.

You just try not to think about him as much as possible. But when you ignore him, he just seems to get worse.

“Jesus, you don’t think it’s a bit early to start drinking?”

You mentally groan as you hear his voice, avoiding eye contact as you crack open the bottle.

“I mean, Isn’t this shithole supposed to be for rehabilitation?” You can practically hear the smirk in his voice as he opens the fridge.

“Why don’t you focus on your own rehab first, dick? Been weeks now and you’re still an asshole,” You snap, before taking a swig of your beer. He shrugs, grabbing the orange juice from the fridge and placing it on the counter. He walks past where you’re leaning on the counter to get a glass.

“I mean, damn, you didn’t even try today, huh?”He laughs.

“Why are you pickin’ a fight with me right now?” You raise your voice a little, exasperated and too hungover to deal with this.

“oh, uh, i dunno… i’m bored?” He shrugs again, looking over to you with a self satisfied smile. You groan in frustration, then sigh, forcing yourself to keep it together.

“…and you wonder why your wives left you,” you mumble with a roll your eyes, turning to quickly leave the kitchen. you don’t see his face, but judging from the sound of a crash and footsteps quickly following you into the hallway, you hit a nerve. oh, god, here we go…

“you fucking junkie bitch!” he yells after you as you stomp up the stairs.

“you’re proving my point right now!” you say over your shoulder.

“Like you have room to talk? Let’s bring up your love life, huh?!”

“oh my god shut up!” Angel yells through the door as you pass his room. “Every fuckin’ morning with you two!”

Adam ignores him, continuing to rant as he follows closely behind you, every degrading name he can think of spilling from his lips.

“…fucking whore cunt- whose not even fucking listening to me!” he says as you turn into your room. you turn, attempting to slam the door, but he sticks his foot in the gap and grabs the door, shoving it back open.

“what in the fuck is your problem today?!” you yell.

“it’s you, bitch!”

“oh my god- how do you care about anything this much? Seriously, it’s not that deep!”

you jump a little as he suddenly slaps the beer bottle out of your hands, the glass shattering loudly and the leftover beer soaking your socks. your jaw drops, outraged, and you can’t help the reflex to reach up and smack the side of his head.

“ow!” he yelps, and you raise your fists to hit him again, when-

“you- fucking bitch-!” he shouts. you cry out in surprise as he grabs your wrists and yanks you with surprising ease, shoving you roughly into the wall behind you.

theres a struggle, both grunting with the strain of pushing against each other as Adam wrestles to keep the upper hand. You go to knee him, but he moves quicker, slotting one of his legs between your own and pressing his body against yours to pin you completely against the wall.

then, something changes. he pauses, the close proximity seems to have finally registered in his brain. his eyes widen and you pause too, both panting, faces inches apart. his grip loosens, and a flicker of confusion crosses his features.

“wait, what’s-“

“shut up,” you snap suddenly. before you even realize what you’re doing, your hands are on his chest, and you’re shoving him towards your bed.

“take off your shirt,” you command as the back of his knees hit the mattress and he’s falling backwards. he quickly does as you say, looking up at you with wide eyes as you straddle him and rip your own shirt off as well. he mumbles a nice when he sees you’re not wearing a bra. you reach to tug off the sweatpants you had on, and as soon as you can kick them away Adam’s hands are on your waist and flipping you over. He hurriedly rips off the rest of his clothes before he’s back on you, leaning down to eagerly press kisses down your neck. you have to tilt your head to make room for the horns now permanently attached to his head, and you think of the irony of this situation.

the sound of fabric ripping followed immediately by two of his fingers finding your clit makes you gasp. you bite back a whimper as he begins to rub rough and sloppy circles on your clit. the pleasure doesn’t last long before he’s pulling his hand back, only to shove a finger inside your cunt quickly, and you gasp again. being so unprepared, the stretch burns a bit. fuck, has he always had such big hands? he’s gentle at first, as he works the single finger in and out of you, and once the pain subsides, he quickly adds a second one.

“Oh, fuck,” you can’t help the curse that slips past your lips, and before long you’re rocking your hips against his hand. his movements are rushed and sloppy, impatient as he stretches you out. he chuckles dryly, and you shoot him a glare.

once again, before long, he’s pulling away, and grabbing you by the shoulders to make you sit up with him. you whine involuntarily at the loss of contact, and the cocky bastard laughs again.

“So impatient, babe,” He grins.

“Shut up,” You say again, pushing him so that he’s sitting up against the bed frame. You crawl over to him, and straddle his lap. His hands find your ass, groping it roughly while you grab the base of his cock and align the tip with your entrance.

You both gasp in unison when you swiftly lower yourself to take his full length. A strangled moan escapes from your lips and you let your head fall forward to rest on his shoulder. Eyes squeezed shut, you wait so you can adjust to his size. Seriously, how had you never noticed how big he was before now? Prematurely, Adam angles his hips and suddenly thrusts up into you, making you cry out in pain and pleasure.

“Oh you like that, bitch? Huh?” He says teasingly, running his hands up and down your back before moving his hips again.

“You have seriously got to learn to be quiet,” You retort through gritted teeth, reaching up to pull his hair from the roots. He lets out a groan, followed by a more pathetic whine as you begin to move on his length.

It must be all the pent up emotion, because you’re very quickly unable to speak beyond a few curses and wanton moans. Adam however, can’t seem to stop talking. Mumbling about how good you feel- for a whore, how he didn’t think you’d be so tight, how you’re so fucking sexy he wishes he’d done this sooner.

“Ugh, Adam- shut up!” You groan as you move desperately. He whines as you pull his hair again for emphasis, biting his lip as you feel his hips snap up into yours.

“Oh, god-“ You’re squealing, back arching as you can feel your whole body tense. You’re on top, but as you grow more limp, he’s holding you upright as he roughly fucks into you. “I’m close!” You warn, and it comes out a strangled sob.

You’re so, so close. Euphoria clouds your brain, and collapse onto him as he continues to hold you up to thrust into you.

You fall backwards, and Adam follows, caging you underneath him as he chases his own release now.

“oh- fuck- don’t stop!” You’re practically screaming as your orgasm crashes over you, and you wrap your arms around and claw at Adam desperately, fingernails leaving marks on his fleshy back. You only faintly register the breathless laugh he lets out at your state as he now pounds into you.

He slams into you with an intensity that forces the air out of your lungs, and even Adam can’t form thoughts or speak anymore.

“Oh, fu-uuck, fuck, fuck, oh my god,” He can’t believe the noises that are coming from him, but he also can’t find it in himself to care when you feel this good. You’re so sensitive, and still tight from your previous climax, and he can feel your pulse in the walls of your cunt as you clench around him.

Pleasure quickly turns to overstimulation, and you moan his name again, reaching up to pull at his hair, horns, wings, anything, as tears begin to prick at your eyes. Hearing you moan his name, seeing the look on your face, knowing he’s the one doing this to you is what he needed to send him over the edge.

“o-oh my god-“ he groans, hips stuttering as he presses his body as close to yours as possible, spilling his cum deeply inside of you with an actual moan.

He stays still for a moment, both of your breathing labored, sweat making your hair stick to your foreheads and necks, but you stay holding eachother. While both your brains are still fuzzy, thoughts muddled from the aftershocks, he takes a hand up and wipes your hair away from your face, and the tears from your eyes.

Eventually, he sits up and pulls out of you, rolling over to lay next to you on the bed. Neither of you say anything, too fucked out to think of the repercussions from your actions.

[slowcatsisland]

Your Thoughts on dating Zoro? Would he fall for women or men? Thinking about popular ships like Zoro x Sanji or Zoro x Robin/Tashigi/Hyiori? ❤️❤️❤️

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Roronoa Zoro Thoughts: Emotional Intelligence and Ability To Date

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Tw guys my opinion don’t hate me☝️

Okay so ima explain my understanding of Zoro’s character and his possibility of being romantically involved with another person and then my thoughts on Zoro’s popular ships.

To me, Zoro is a physical representation of a protector, a predator, and loyalty (and death but that’s not fully realized). He prioritizes the safety of the people important to him, burdens himself to evolve into a stronger swordsman for the people close to him, and sees more value in actions rather than words.

He used to be someone that was living for himself, until Kuina. Then he was living for his shared promise to become the greatest swordsman, until Luffy. Until Thriller Bark, Sabaody, and his exile in Muggy Kingdom. Now he lives for his crew, to ensure Luffy’s dream and through Luffy achieving his dream Zoro will achieve his own (plus him actually having another duel with Mihawk). Yk what I’m saying? He still has a goal, but it has changed to encompass the Strawhats as a whole with a special bond towards Luffy.

There’s this tiktok editing account called ._avxmvx_ and they have such good edits that I feel like speak for Zoro’s character- just a side note hehe

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Okay guys, me personally, I don’t see Zoro being interested in dating. It’s not anywhere near the top of his list in canon. Plus he’s sort of the newest addition to the characters that embody death in One Piece and he has that whole ‘walking Asura’s path’ thing going on.

Although I do like reading about/the dynamic of Zoro with a person that is either the representation of a higher being (ie, Luffy being the god Nika through his devil fruit yk smth like that) or of things associated with gods (example being person with relations/undertones of say wine, grapes, floral, earthy colors, with a personality summed up in a few words as indulgent, capricious, joyous, and fiendish because all of these things are alluded to the Greek god Dionysus.)

Zoro being paired with someone with religious and spiritual energy and ties is something I personally enjoy because Zoro is a character that is morally grey, has no belief in a higher being, has accepted damning himself for the sake of others, and actually has in canon relationships that have religious implications (guys Luffy and Zoro trust me bro)

I like dynamics like those paired with Zoro because I think it’s something that challenges his way of viewing the world when he’s surrounded by someone that encompasses a higher influence that’s not attainable by people but it’s not forcing him change yk??

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Zoro is also a character with a stunted emotional understanding and capacity for empathy in my opinion.

I say this because of his parent’s death at an early age, a heavy training focused childhood, the death of his only close friend, and the isolation of his teenage years when he left Shimotsuki village up until he met Luffy.

This isn’t to say that he doesn’t feel emotion and can’t joke around (pre time skip funny Zoro come back to me pls) but overall I think it’s easier for Zoro to not engage with others on a highly emotional level and in emotional situations Zoro is most comfortable looking at things rationally as best he can without adding subjectiveness onto the situation (think Water 7, his opposition to Usopp rejoining the crew without properly apologizing and atoning.)

Zoro also actively tries to squash his feelings imo which is kinda sad. (Think how in drum island he tells himself to squash instincts and so now he’s not shown to be cold even in punk hazard and the beginning of egghead he was just toughening it out.)I think he does this because his mind associates the best swordsman with strength and not being influenced by your surrounding.

Which is why I think Mihawk is the reason for his stoicism post timeskip.

Now, this relates back to his ability to be with someone romantically because it probably wouldn’t be easy for him to. Especially not emotionally. It probably would be uncharted territory for him and if he wanted it his partner would have to work with him and teach him and build up his ability to understand others emotions and the ability to sympathize/empathize.

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Now, gender wise, I actually can’t give you a clear answer on what I think Zoro’s preference would be. I feel like Zoro’s preference is more of a scale that looks at character traits and actions rather than identity and appearance.

In all honesty, I could see Zoro having an easier time becoming involved with a man rather than a woman. I don’t have much reasoning for it though, it’s just a feeling.

Perhaps his comfortability in his masculinity? Maybe because of how obviously dense he is when it comes to women? Maybe his past relationships of Saga and Kuina? Idk

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So, in canon Zoro being in a relationship is a no go imo. (Edit: asexual man) Now let’s discuss my thoughts on Zoro’s popular ships.

I don’t ship Zoro with anyone, however I do appreciate the dynamics of some of his ships because I view them as something deeper than romance.

To me, a lot of Zoro’s ships are understood as a soulmate- you feel right in my life and I want to be around you type of way I’ll protect you no matter how bloody the future is- not a -I really like you I wanna kiss you and have sex with you and you can talk to me all about your feelings about the world- type of way

Not saying that the ladder can’t or isn’t presented in fandom media, it is just something that I don’t prioritize seeing in Zoro ships.

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Zoro x Luffy: I appreciate Zoro x Luffy again in a more subservient dynamic.

(Omg I saw a post like a year ago saying smth about how Zoro is Luffy’s in a way none of the other strawhats are because he hasn’t ever betrayed or left the crew and out of the romance dawn crew he’s the only one that hasn’t done so ugh I wish I could find the creator I’d love to tag them)

I like exploration on how devoted Zoro is to Luffy and I do think that they have a bond that is deeper than just friends or captain and first mate.

But I wouldn’t call it romantic or sexual. It is natural, it is inherent and instinctual, it is almost religious imo

I also don’t think that Luffy is interested in dating.

Because of this, I do think that the ship works in certain ways. (u understand what I’m saying?)

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Zoro x Sanji: I feel like this has potential as a ship but there’s things that need to happen before yk.

First, Sanji needs to acknowledge and heal through his trauma. Of his childhood, guilt, body, Germa, and especially his relationship/perspective of men, masculinity, and women.

I think Zoro could help him through it, if they ever talked about it. But I doubt they would. At least not explicitly. Maybe roundabout but something so minimal the implications could be lost easily on either of them.

But Zoro’s lack of emotional understanding is also called into play here. This is something that Sanji is very good at. He’s emotionally aware and attune to those around him. They are opposites in this way. But pairing them together isn’t good imo in a ship way. Yk?

I like the ship dynamic in how they complete each other in different ways. I read a post before about Zoro’s association with the number three and Sanji’s representation of the number three. Sanji’s humanity compared with Zoro’s brutalism or strength. They are strong in different ways. They are vital to the crew in different ways.

They work as a duo more than a ship to me though. I don’t see them romantic, I don’t see them sexual, but I do see them as sort of kindred flames or something of soulmates.

They belong in each other’s world and they do need each other but they won’t admit it. Yk?

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Zoro x Robin: guys no.

I’m sorry but I just don’t support this ship at allllllll.

I do understand the evidence that Zorobin shippers bring up. They are alike, they do have a good dynamic, they respect each other, they are vital to the crew, but it’s just mid.

I feel like I don’t like it that much because regardless of Zoro’s loyalty to Robin as shown, Zoro doesn’t really interact with her fondly. Yk? Like I don’t remember seeing them just kinda chit chat for a second. There’s always something that is the catalyst for them to interact as far as I understand.

I also don’t think that Zoro is the best significant other for Robin. He isn’t what Robin would want nor need.

I say this due to his emotional intelligence, his aloof personality overall, and his dedication to training. I also say this because of Robin’s intellectualism, childhood experience, and personality. I feel like Franky is just so much better for her (sorry guys rip Frobin from my dead body.)

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Zoro x Tashigi: I do not see this as a ship. I don’t like it particularly as a ship either.

I liked Tashigi and Zoro’s first dynamic when they first interacted with each other in Loguetown when Tashigi and Smoker were originally introduced.

The way that Tashigi was a female swordsman that looked just like Kuina, Zoro’s dead friend. The way that this made Zoro uncomfortable and he couldn’t handle it.

I loved it. I thought it was so interesting for Zoro’s character. I wish they kept it in post timeskip because it would’ve changed their behavior (or at least Zoro’s) towards each other in Punk Hazard.

I feel like this also ties into Zoro’s emotional capacity as well because he understands why he’s uncomfortable but he doesn’t try to change it- he only ever tries to run from her and increase their distance.

So, I don’t see nor support this as a ship, but I liked it a lot when Zoro was uncomfortable around Tashigi.

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Zoro x Kuina: I do not view this as a ship either.

I think that Kuina was best as Zoro’s friend and the added complexity of romantic feelings at such a young age plus her death is just a lot. It’s a lot for Zoro.

I also don’t feel like it suits Zoro either. Loving her like that would better suit and origin story for Sanji ykwim?

Plus I like how Kuina was his goal and it intentionally wasn’t romantic. I liked the friendly deep connection between two swordsman.

I also don’t think that Kuina would have viewed Zoro like that even if she properly grew up.

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Zoro x Hiyori: Hmmmmmmmm.

I kinda have mixed feelings about this one.

At first I didn’t like it. I didn’t understand why Hiyori liked Zoro and to be honest I still don’t.

The only reason I really see is because he wasn’t attracted to her and protected her physically. Plus he’s a strong swordsman like her father.

I actually really really like Hiyori’s character, but I feel like it might’ve been a mistake to add her feelings towards Zoro into Wano by Oda. But I do really like how she didn’t necessarily act on it. Sure, she had some damsel in distress moments and did flirt with him, but she kept her priorities straight and helped free Wano.

I really respect her for that. I wish that more female characters were done properly like her.

Zoro also clearly showed no interest towards her. The most he cared for in relation to her in my opinion was her father, Oden, her brother, Momonosuke, and the blade Enma.

Zoro also wouldn’t be willing to have feelings for her. She isn’t a part of the Strawhats and has no future with them. She isn’t hugely impactful towards the Strawhats as a whole. His loyalty wouldn’t ever be able to be in two places at once like it would be if he loved her yk??

I like Hiyori, I like Zoro, but I don’t like them together

So. The ship is okay I guess. I don’t ship it and I don’t support it however. I also don’t ever see it happening in canon. I also think Hiyori wouldn’t like Zoro if she really got to know him and would be better with a different person.

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Heheh this was nice to write about I enjoy Zoro’s character. Kinda long too

Thanks for reading

Mwah 😽

[eidolonlathi]

A Look at the Dynamics between the Sanguinarch and Lettou

I’ll never get over the irony how a Vampire who detests non-Sarkaz and is so obsessed with the purity of Sarkaz bIood is shown to have the most stable bond throughout the Londinium arc with a Liberi, excuse me, with an outbIood.

They’re witnessing from afar how Allerdale’s manor is burning down, it’s the first scene they share together, and it’s already setting the tone for all of their future interactions. Lettou makes a tentative attempt to talk to the Sanguinarch – about what we’ll never know – just to immediately get ordered to stop talking because the Sanguinarch wants to enjoy the view in silence. He is picking up though that Lettou isn’t agreeing fully with methods having become more drastic and does two things: First he suggests (orders) that Lettou stops worrying and learns to enjoy the destruction in front of him while calling Lettou his friend. And second he offers him the slightest bit of justification of his own actions by claiming that witnessing the evaporation of the traitor bIood in front of them is the Sanguinarch’s responsibility, implying that he is driven by more than pure bIoodIust in this moment. Lettou can’t do much more in this moment than to agree that they share a common goal, but at the same time he does a bit more than that: He states that cooperating with the Sanguinarch’s methods is his duty, hence repeating the sentiment that both of their actions are driven by circumstances that go beyond personal motivation.

Those two finding this point of agreement is no coincidence. At their core they both are people who have no higher priority than fulfilling the things they view as their duty. With Lettou no one notices because he immediately gets dismissed as a traitor, and with the Sanguinarch one doesn’t because he’s so cruel and abrasive that it’s hard to notice any nuance beyond that.

You keep reading and see that the state in Londinium has now declined to a degree that now even the nobility who was kept safe in their bubble have become targets. The artillery canons Manfred uses spread terror from afar, the destruction the Sanguinarch and Lettou cause tends to be one committed from up close. We see the Sanguinarch relying on Lettou’s help when disposing of a noble who has become a nuisance and like in the scene with Allerdale’s manor getting destroyed carnage and enjoyment blur together. Once the noble is dealt with, the Sanguinarch suggests (orders) that he and Lettou follow the invitation of the now disposed of noble to sample his private wine reserve. As much as the Sanguinarch claims to despise outbloods, Lettou’s presence clearly doesn’t ruin his appetite, interesting.

You’ll continue reading and see that a destruction that is already spreading is one difficult to contain and control. Lettou tentatively implies to the Sagnuinarch that it might have been a measure too drastic that he has fed a nobleman’s wife and child to his Vampires. Or at least he tries to address the point. The Sanguinarch doesn’t even let him finish his sentence and uses his bIood arts to cut off Lettou’s ability to breathe. Lettou orders his men to stand back when they are about to defend him in this moment – thus ensuring they won’t end up as a guaranteed collateral damage against a Vampire they have no chance against – rather accepting to face his end alone. But that never arrives. The Sanguinarch lets him live.

The moment makes you question why the Sanguinarch is still keeping Lettou around at this point, and he just answers that himself. He calls Lettou his pet Falcon and claims that when other people wonder why he’s keeping around and spoiling a pet that occasionally pecks his finger, that he’s doing it because the personality and intelligence of his pet bird makes the effort still worth it.

At this point it really becomes striking how fear and control have become a constant element of their interactions. But at the same time this appears to be driven more by purpose than mere malice. The Sanguinarch will physically hurt Lettou and compare him to a pet bird when feeling disappointed with him, but in the same moment he will admit that he keeps him around because he values his personality and intelligence. If you continue to look at their interactions you'll notice how there is an ongoing theme how the Sanguinarch won’t hesitate to be crueI to Lettou – usually to ‘teach’ him to do better – but at the same time it is Lettou who is the one person he cares to keep around himself. Keeping a non-Sarkaz close apparently doesn’t count as long as he calls him his pet. Endlessly fascinated by the cope he puts in place here.

Because, you know, the Falcon thing goes both ways. On the first look it just looks like yet another way to humiliate Lettou. On closer look, the Sanguinarch just implied that he had been confronted with people who were wondering why he keeps that outblood this close. Making a point how he only keeps him around as a ‘pet’ sort of solves his problem and also protects Lettou from other Sarkaz assuming that the Sanguinarch cares. And with the tense and distrustful atmosphere around the Sarkaz Royal Court you can see how that would be a point he would like to make.

Team Amiya targets the command tower of the Defense Forces and this multilayered dynamic only extends itself. By this point Lettou has lost almost all sense of self-preservation and doesn’t bother to dodge the attacks directed at him. Partially he refuses to leave the tower because he can’t bring it over himself to abandon his men who are still fighting, partially he feels an end by the hands of the Sarkaz has become unavoidable, so why resist? Given this insight it’s a sad irony that the very first the Sanguinarch does when arriving on the tower is to put a shield of bIood between Lettou and Ascalon, protecting him from her attack. He immediately reprimands Lettou for being foolish enough to not dodge an opponent he knows to be stronger than him and puts his ‘blessing’ on the soldiers Lettou feels responsible for, disposing of the one thing that prevented Lettou to think of his own wellbeing first. But you know… For all the tantrum the Sanguinarch is throwing and for all the threats he is making towards Lettou, it’s again one of those odd situations where the words spoken don’t quite reflect the actions that were taken. Like, buddy, if Lettou is really that disposable in your eyes then why go through the effort of shielding him from Team Amiya at all? Why instead not instantly go for the crown you’re so set on destroying when surprise still would have been on your side, hmm? I guess danger forcing one to make quick decisions reveals some of one’s priorities after all.

Episode twelve shows little of those two interacting but the one instance that does is the more interesting because the scene involves Damazti. He treats it as complete routine to tell Lettou that he’d better hurry back to the Sanguinarch because "he had just opened a new bottle of wine, waiting for you, and we have already grown tired of his stories of yesteryear. You are a much better listener than we are". Stranger domestic habits have developed, I guess. It’s sort of telling though how Damazti views Lettou as his instant ticket out of having to participate in a conversation he finds boring, viewing the Sanguinarch and Lettou as some sort of item.

If Damazti noticed this you can be certain that Theresis did as well. I always found the timing a bit too convenient that the Defense Forces got disarmed around the same time Theresis was about to send the Sanguinarch to perform the ritual at Brentwood. One has to ask if Theresis had kept the defense at Brentwood this suspiciously low because he had hoped to get rid of the Sanguinarch. It looks as if from Theresis view it was most convenient to get rid of both annoyances at the same time. I wonder if he had counted on the Sanguinarch disposing of Lettou earlier and got caught by surprise when that never happened.

With the Defense Forces disarmed at the end of Episode 13, Lettou sees little hope for anything. It gets implied that he never really believed Theresis would hand back the Gaulish platforms and only hoped that his actions would create an opening for his compatriots in the Gaulish restoration to act. Witnessing the escalating violence in Londinim, he decides to kiII the old Vieux Vanguard he had been looking after before any of the Sarkaz can get him into their hands. And then he goes to see the Sanguinarch one last time, kiIIing himself right before his eyes.

With what we witnessed so far it comes as little surprise to see the kind of breaking point Lettou has reached, but interestingly amongst his desperation there are still elements of determination. On his way to see the Vieux Vanguard Clovisia approaches Lettou, offering him to join her side and safe himself through it. Not only does he decline, he basically calls Clovisia a ruthless opportunist who is using the chaos for her own goals. It's clear he neither trusts her nor holds any respect for her. But also, given what will happen later… in rejecting her offer he’s staying loyal to the Sanguinarch even when he has already decided that he wants to leave him on his own terms. Lettou kiIIing himself in front of the Sanguinarch while calling him names was an act of spite and desperation, sure, but also one ingrained with a twisted sense of loyalty. Even when acknowledging the dismal conditions he had been in and when checking out on his own conditions, Lettou did so in a way that wouldn't inconvenience the Sanguinarch.

Clovisia’s offer had no chance to shake his decision. Lettou moved in the confinements he was in at the time, sure, but he did so while holding on to the last shred of principles and dignity he had. It was also an act that left the Sanguinarch baffled. He could imagine that Lettou would try and hurt him in the state he was in, but he hadn’t seen the possibility that Lettou would hurt himself. The Sanguinarch gets taken by surprise but can’t even admit that to himself. Instead he tells himself like ten times that Lettou was an insignificant existence and that there’s no reason to care that he died.

The Sanguinarch has been shown to have the most stable bond throughout the Londinium arc with a non-Sarkaz he called his pet, but he tells himself that he doesn’t care the Liberi just cut his own throat, even though not even five minutes ago he told Lettou he should feel honored that the Sanguinarch let him close in ways he doesn’t even with his fellow Vampires. He reminds himself that the insignificant man he wasted the last couple of years with was but a pathetic existence, so insignificant even that he will not waste a single thought more to think about this annoying person who didn’t matter. The Sanguinarch is going to stop thinking about Lettou for sure. Soon. Any moment now. Dude goes and claims he doesn’t care even though we have seen by now that this is not entirely true. Dude goes and claims he doesn’t care and sounds like the person he has to convince the most is he himself.