#i didnt even get imprisoned 3 here

[baileyboo2016]

I DID IT GUYS I FUCKING DID IT

[fenharel]

some of my thoughts after finishing veilguard a couple days ago before i start my second playthrough :)

ok i think its important to note first that the things i was most looking forward too was 1. solas, 2. solavellan, 3. lore. im self aware enough to know that this will have had some influence towards what i expected from the game and what i enjoyed/cared about or not 👍

good

solas: im honestly so happy. my man is finally happy and reunited with his wife!!!!!! my heart feels so full 😭 this game was a solas fans wet dream. absolutely loved everything we got. hunting down regrets and watching old memories. talking to him in the fade. the entire crossroads!!!!!! him shit talking elgar'nan. watching him go trickster mode and imprison rook. fighting the archdemon as the dread wolf!!!!!! i could go on forever. CHEFS KISS TO IT ALL<3333333333333 if anything i wish there would have been MORE im greedy what can i say

solavellan: screaming crying throwing up. i still cant believe it oh my fucking god

lore reveals: i found all the reveals about all our old theories so fun. i didnt like all of them (old gods are just dragons? c'mon.) but overall it felt so rewarding to have picked up on it all. or be totally surprised by something (mythal and solas the reason for the titans and the blight? wow.)

the executors, forgotten and forbidden ones: the next big bads of the next game huh!!!! loved what we got for the most part, the mysterious circle codexes where probably the most interesting in the game. anaris actually showing up shocked me. i wish bellaras brother didnt say "for plot reasons i must die" and actually told us something about him but oh well. im cautiously optimistic about the secret ending for now. what it implied could go either way for now...

main quest: not all of them, but a lot of them were awesome. dare i say some quests were up there with the best main quests in da??? weisshaupt was epic. or the blood of arlathan. every time we get to talk to solas (thehe<3). the final bits. the strong points were so strong that the low points got highlighted a bit too much imo

act 3: by far my favourite act. this was soooo good. the romance finally (?!) kicking it. suicide mission 2.0 stressed me tf out. the varric reveal? send me to the asylum. solas tricking rook? king behaviour i was cheering for him while crying about varric. the dread wolf transformation. the conversation between solas/mythal/lavellan at the end. i basically was in tears throughout half of the thing. couldnt read the credits at all. act 3 was amazing

minrathous vs treviso: i loved this especially with the angst of playing a shadow dragon who failed minrathous. and then the consequences and quest changes this causes throughout the game was really cool. i wish there were more bigger choices like this since it felt a bit flat choice wise besides of this one, but it was amazing.

villains: ghilan'nain and elgar'nan were great. they really felt like the tyrannical gods they were supposed to be. im so glad there was mostly no corypheus-esque cringe. (tho especially ghil had some video gamey lines but sdjkfhjksdf i still love her)

neutral

rook: i dont really care much about rook.. 🙈. mind you rook was certainly not the reason why i wanted to play this game so im sure a second playthrough will make me warm up to them more, now that my head is more free, but it just didnt insta click. rook didnt feel like a real person to me, almost nobody had any (to my taste) realistic reactions towards them. the stakes just were too high for them to get treated this way (nobody is pissed off that they freed the gods? everyone just believes them when they say gods are walking around? everyone just agrees to work with them? nobody cares how rook is doing? or who rook even is? idk.) i didnt like the introduction much either. the shepard treatment didnt work for me here, just believing that rook is fit for the job because varric says so wasn't enough for me. anyway i dont wanna bash on rook, i know i'll end up liking them later. the headcanons will be headcanoning<3

companions: i... don't have strong feelings about most of them? all of them got to me sooner or later, made me cry. but afterwards im still 🤷‍♀️ about most. i didnt feel like we get to know them as deeply as we get to know companions in the previous games. i really really missed sitting in the lighthouse for hours and talk to them, ask them about their profession or what they are about outside of cutscenes like in the previous ones. i think that would have helped me click with them faster. i didnt find all companion quests very strong either. the "high stakes" of the main story made some conflicts feel a bit like we can just fix that after the story lol. i did not like the mass effect 2 treatment of them much... (but me2 is overrated anyway sshh dont kill me<3) some companion quests i did find interesting lore wise (bellara, harding) even if i wish that some of them would have went a bit deeper there. anyway i know i'll probably end up loving them all after a couple of playthroughs, this almost always happens to me, dai is the best example.

combat: don't care. this isn't my type of combat, i don't play a lot of super actiony combo dodge dodge block combat games. still hate the limited abilities. at least it didn't feel too clunky on mouse and keyboard and it was "fun enough" to me so thats good

puzzles: i could put them into the bad category but at least they weren't too terrible so i don't want to be too harsh. but i don't enjoy doing them. i dont want to search for a crystal in a bush. i mean i did them all but at what cost. this felt like filler i thought they wanted to avoid by not adding fetch quests???

bad

pacing: this games hardest battle imo. the pacing of the game is... strange. act 1 is way too fast. it feels like we're running and have absolutely no time for anything. (makes sense! didnt work well though). act 2 then drags a bit with all the companion quests, and the mix really drags the progression of the romances as well to a ridiculous degree. at least with lucanis, idk how it is with the others. i love him and i can headcanon to fill in the blanks so i liked his romance, but it does make it seem like nothing is happening for 50 hours for everyone who doesnt like to headcanon around. anyway, the pacing/storytelling felt often not fitting. it was trying to be mass effect in a story that is too complex and the lore too rich to run through it. this felt like the main reason why we just never went very deep into the lore of the factions or new npcs, or learn or see certain things, the complex nature of the crows, or tevinter magisters and their slaves, we are just running all the damn time? we never get to explore certain things that would feel unnatural to come up in a conversation or in some other way because we are limited by the things the story "has time for". or what the devs had time for.

wishy washy writing: not everywhere but in some places and im not used to that in a da game so its a bit baffling. "the blight is different now so thats the reason for x trust me bro" ok....? "the first of my people do not die so easily" = mythal is shattered and lives on, makes sense. but the other evanuris are all dead, even the ones that were "dead" already? why? idk........ i shall stay delusional for now and hope i've missed something in my completionist run that i now in my next run will find somewhere lol.

limited worldstate: im not tooo hung about it but i certainly wish it was different. i had hoped they at least commit to it. but then adding little references that could have just been made personal by switching one line just made the reference a bit jarring sometimes instead of exciting. or making morrigan eat mythals memories for the regret quest....really? this could have been the well of sorrows choice, why could they not have just made the inquisitor show up in the crossroads if they were the one that drank from it. this whole choice thing + some other problems ended up feeling like something they didnt really want to do but ended up doing because the game was in development for so long they just had to finally fucking finish it. and it sucks for us.

the veil: why... is it still there? they left breadcrumps of clues throughout the entire series about all the positives it would do if it was gone, even add a damn prophecy, and then just dont do it.... ever perhaps? must the blight really be cured for this? demons forever feared? listen im just glad solas is ok at the end of the day but he could still have had his redemption/healing/forgiving himself moment after destroying it imo.

i wish the inquisitor was more involved in everything :((( the moments we did get made me SO happy but. yeah.

no quicksave and the skip button that ruined my screenshots deserve their own bullet point what the hell

anyway enough yapping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! overall i loved the game because the stuff i cared about the most was the best aspects of the game sdkjhsdjkf im not ashamed to admit that this is my new solas 2.0 game. ..... <3

[maryhadalittlehobby]

Interview with the Vampire S2E7- Liveblog

I could not prevent it

Why are Claudia and Louis not communicating telepathically. He is screaming out to her not even knowing if she is around. He even says he he didnt know if she was alive but surely telepathically would be better but I guess he is panicking

I love the mutual respect Daniel and Louis have built. Louis says I am talking now and Daniel shuts the hell up. AND APOLOGIZES

God Santiago and his blue eyes shadow are SERVING (looks and injustice!)

Louis says the vampires 'used their collective powers to disorient their minds, their hearing(jaws compressing the skull)' him and Claudia when they tried to speak out. The shaky camera was cool this first time

Claudia looks ok after coming out the rat box is lol, Louis looked more f-ed up

God Madeline is out of it! Sis is on a different planet. What did Santiago do to her?

When I saw their tendons cut in the trailer I started crying, I just knew we were in for it but the trail as a whole wasn't as bloody as I thought it would be

This swelling music introducing Lestat was beautiful. Can't lie it had me smiling

Walk walk fashion baby

Claudia's withering look and Louis look of pain. My heart

That first look that Lestat gives its almost like a marionette very unnatural

He is looking SNATCHED in that pinstripe suit. But also lets talk about the pinstripe because we know LAST season the costume designer said they used stripes when the characters felt imprisoned

Louis face when Lestat says its a story of LOVE. Lestats wet eyes god these two

The Vampire Sam blocking Armands exit. Armands?! Sam?!? If it were Celeste or any of the others we have seen more ferocious or active in the coven anyone might have bought it but SAM lol

Armand told Louis he was held captive and his punishment was to watch ok Jan

I LOVE the animations. Lestat doing a entrechat six into the dirt (that ballet knowledge coming in handy!)

He slept for 100 years saying his only sustenance the ancient blood already inside him. AKASHA??

ugh the look of disdain Lestat gives Santiago for being forced to play long/recite these lines

Be precise in your declarations advocate🤝🏾 we should get ever y detail right

Louis favorite cuss is definitely Fuck lol

I love the irrdecent glint they have added to vampires eyes this season

Eglee scouting her next boyfriend like-oh you put your fist through a skull. Thats hot

Lestat putting bigots in their place. oh no when the worst person alive says something you agree with meme

Claudia standing up for Louis during the trail<3. Yelling at Santiago earlier to stop hurting him, yelling at the crowd for laughing at him. This girl loved her dad ok.

'Louis was deceptively agile with words" AND?! I support him. I said you start it, Louis is gonna end it. Someone on here said you go low and Louis goes straight to hell and its true! Don't play with him and you wont get your feeling hurt. PERIOD

I loved the vampoire lonliness bit but I hated that CGI tear

Not Santiago doing Claudias accent rearding from her diary. lol BITCH

"You do not know this girl!."She is a stranger and Louis knows how turning a stranger feels like now

The over acting! "THE GREAT LAWS FORBID IT" So clear he was trying to paint himself in a great light but we can be relatively certain that lestat did not say this since both Claudia and Louis repeat that Lestat didn't tell them anything regarding laws or even other vampires existence. There would have been more questions if he did

I DO believed he warned him but not to the extent we see and I'm sure Louis didn't bargin himself like that. How could be?

She asked if I was an Angel.Me? oh my poor Saint Louis

Look at her our beautiful little daughter as he drags her half dead body on the floor. ugh??

What is this look that Armand is giving Louis when he says thats how it happened but I didn't think it at the time. I don't trust him at all. IS THAT HOW IT HAPPENED OR IS IT HOW ARMAND WANTS YOU TO THINK IT HAPPENED TO COMPOUND YOUR GUILT ABOUT HER TURNING?

I hate this?! is it all lies??

Holy crap DREAMSTAT!?

Louis slightly shakes his head in agreement when Lestat at first we just slammed each other around the town house. Seven years of compromise, denail it all gave way...The reached a tipping point they drove each other crazy. I can see it happening like Lestat decribes maybe not over the top villain vibes but definitely getting ugly like that. And like someone mentioned in the short chat I was in earlier- Louis is capable of making good on those threats. Look what happened with the alderman, the guy in the cruising park.

I can't believe the fall was not explained away or a mistaken memory like i thought and was absolutely not worthy of forgiveness...but i guess maybe in a fucked up way Louis thought it was penance for withholding admittance of his love even as Lestat begged him in the sky

The apolgy was a little melodramatic and had me thinking it might be in the script but Daniel said it was not on the page, Maybe Sam couldn't rein it in at that moment lol

How fucking sad Claudia's trail isn't even about her. The talks to both Louis and Lestat at multiple points and they don't or barely acknowledge her. Truly a pawn in their fucked up romance

Lestat looked physically sick when Claudia and Louis were pleading to him. You gonna accept my apology. Is this your big revenge. If he could I think he would have stopped it but I think the vamps were controlling him in a way( like they were doing with Claudia and Louis OR its the Sophies choice everyone is quoting. Its Louis or Claudia and he is choosing Louis

Mr I could not prevent it looking around the trail crowd pleased curiosity

I am so happy to proven wrong and Madeline choose Claudia.I was thinking that it might be another bombshell it would be revealed that she was only interested in vampirism. Finally she is 1st

Madeline flipping off the jury. Good girl

Claudia cursing the audience in her final moments on earth. yes girl!

I feel like the look shared between Claudia and Lestat right after was you liked that and his response look was that was quite good.

Oh how I hoped Lestat would at least try to save her..break script again but he almost looks immobilzed-again the vamps?

Claudia's death was horrid with better effects that Louis burn away earlier in the season.Ugh

How fuckin disrespectful they leave their ashes on stage like that. THEY HAVE TO SCATTER THEM!

Wow I can't believe I survived episode 7 with out crying. Definitely some close calls but I didn't.It was unexpectedly funny and Claudia going out like a G! helped a lot. Amazing episode.

[ganondoodle]

I only just found your fancomic and art now and I’m really curious as to where Farore, Nayru and Din fit in with your AU, and where Courage fits in with it all too; is the first Link/hero that Hylia chose supposed to be the reincarnation of Courage?

Well, you see, i kinda took the zelda lore and remixed it until it tasted good to me uwu

actual answer is i rewrote the lore .. or put it in a different context so it might be confusing at first and i dont know just how much into detail you want me to explain bc .. theres alot .. like ALOT

to sum it up rly shortly:

in my AU/comic the gods (here a rough sketch i did last time i redesigned them, tho this is only nayru, actually all three are one entity but also not, like three bodies melted together at the hips down)

-each created a world, and once life started to thrive there they chose a mortal to call them to come to them, the gods then killed them and used the mortals spirit to create a deity, not mortal, but no god either, as their servant

"Courage" (not actually their name, just a word to call them since their language is long lost) is the first one to be created, but fails the purpose the gods had intended for them rather quickly; so they abandon them and flood the world until nothing but Courage survives, out of madness/desperation Courage then destroys the ancient statue of the gods and promptly discovers a path to another world through it

and that is the second world, in which "Demise" (also not his actual name) resides, he is the deity of that world and has so far succeeded, although not quite like the gods intended; he was told essentially the same prophecy we hear in the intro of skyward sword (invasion of a monster etc.) this monster is in this case Courage, who attacks Demise, who in turn seals Courage away quite easily, which isnt how the prophecy went, he was supposed to die, which makes him doubt the whole plan and starts intentionally delaying working further on it, so long in fact that Courage, now mishapen (similar to the imprisoned) and mindless, breaks free of the seal Demise then kills them, but loses one of his blade spirits in the fight (he used to have two here in my AU), now that the gods plan is not doable anymore (since Courage is dead) they abandon him and his world alot of stuff happens here, inclusing mortals turning to war, then against him, and him destroying his version of the triforce as he saw it as the source of the conflicts; but in the end his world dies a slow death by drought, just like Courage he destroys the ancient statue of the gods in his world and woop theres a path there

which is Hylias world, so, Demise is taken by wrath and grief as this world was allowed to thrive while his own died seeks to reach the the gods in revenge by all means necessarry but is quickly stopped by Hylia, who instead of sealing him like she was ordered to, spares his life, bc who she encountered was not what she was told, and wishes to know why that is, why the gods would lie to her

this is where the comic itself starts, the first encounter of her and demise is the first chapter :3

it is a theme that courage is very similar to link and demise to ganondorf (tho my hylia not that much to zelda hmmmm) but here it has no ACTUAL connection, and the triforce trio as we know in canon has no actual great lineage, no reincarnation, just mortals manipulated by the gods to make them do their bidding after all three deities revolted against being used as the gods puppets

as you can see, im very bad a summing anything up, i hope this didnt sound too lame or something, there is alot of thought and heart put into this story (i even have the background stories of each deity from before they were deities, even tho it doesnt come up in the comic) and i hope i will keep my motivation and passion for this giant project alive enough to get at least more than one chapter done (i have a bad track record of failed comics, im horribly afraid of abandoning this one too bc i put so much more work and love into it already, i guess it depends on the support from you guys how far i will be able to go qwq)

feel free to ask me anything about it, cant promise to respond right away but i cherish nice asks to a point that i dont want to post answers bc then its gone from my inbox lmao

anyway, its 3 am, goodnight and perhaps ... hopefully this gave you a rough idea of what im going for >o<

[hella1975]

:)))))))))))))))

List anon <3

Finally got around to reading Tams chapter 3 so heres that.

I didnt send in a thing for chapter 2 (i cant remember why) but I think I like Lihua. Unless you want to kill her or something in that case i hate her and am determined to not grow attached.

You also might just have the perspective abandon her. But I think Id be able to cope with that.

Not necessarily something that just now occured to me but just something that my mind prompted, I like how in this Zuko is immediately taught that he was like very sheltered. And how theres this big population of people who dont have a choice but to make bad decisions just so themselves and their families to survive.

Yeah I like her. Please dont kill her Im begging you

If you dont kill her ill ko fi you like 4 dollars (pounds??? i dont feel like adjusting my terminology right now)

idk if you remember but a few months ago you were complaining that you were really sick or something and you got an ask saying that they tried to send you i think 2 dollars if you would go to the e.r but their ko fi wasnt working. That was me and i got my ko fi to work and i am NOT above bribing you. Just saying.

Lihua reminds me of a delinquet Jin.

Azulas being imprisoned. That is DEFINETLY probably not going to lead to anything interestgin

Well theres Zhao

Well she was recognized

God shes so smart I love her so much shes figurively playing dumbass Zhao like a fiddle.

"The only reason she had for leaving it was because she knew that Zuko knew she wouldn’t leave it unless something awful had happened. This was a message. People were behind this, and that could only mean one thing." Taob parrelel thing?? Like when Zuko left one of his swords for Hakoda. Not sure if this was intentional or not but its a nice touch.

"Azula had figured out a plan before Zhao had even left her cell" Of course she had. Shes amazing i love her.

Is her Fire bending still orange????? Nice

I like how Azula still resents Ursa

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SOKKA AND KATARA YES I AM SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS

I think its funny that Zuko thinks Sokkas judging him because of his scar (which theres a small possiblity he doesnt know the symbolism for, I dont know i havent read that far yet) and not judging him because hes a firebender like he just exclaimed like dude OBVIOUSLY they are a tad bit distraught by firebending and bros just like "nah its because of my scar.

okay now hes catching on

Zukos so confused right now

Hes got a lot to take in take your time pal

"“Actually,” Zuko frowned, “I wasn’t talking to you.” He turned to Azula. “Well?”" Zukos attitude towards Sokka is so funny. "Its not like zukos going to be intimidated by a whelp like him", Stfu Zuko you were just unsettled by his stare like three paragraphs ago. You have a specific post I keep seeing on pinterest, (and i saw it on facebook one time, that was surreal,) (im pretty sure its you) its the one where its like enemy to lover fics are so funny because the tags are right there or something along those lines. This is giving those vibes. Like he might be unsettled by Sokka now but just wait like 15 chapters when hes REALLY going to be unsettled by him but this time the unsettledness is gay panic so.

I completely forgot about Iroh. Whats he up to nowadays?

"“Besides, Zuko just took out like ten soldiers by himself. I'm sticking with him until we get out of here.”" Im taking this as flirting you cant change my mind.

Wait is this fic even Zukka? *checks* yes it is, okay.

So Sokka is flirting, what next?

Now Azulas pov is acknowedging the difference between the real world and the palace, nice.

I cant remember if this was acknowledged in one of the other chapters or not. If so, oh well.

sOKKA Quit staring at him you dumb gay

Look at Sokka flirting. "Your not what I was expecting" Might as well tell him hes not like the other girls also you werent expecting a hot and mysterious twink in a fire nation strong hold? Be a lot weirder if he was expecting that tbh.

I like how hes asking Aangs consent to put him in a fake hostage situation.

"I'd be honored hotman" See Sokka, even aang will acknowledge that hes hot.

Aw shit Lihua might die

Okay Im done reading it.

This was such a good chapter. I loved it so much, your doing amazing.

I cant put into words how excited I am for the rest of this series.

I mentioned in one of the taob asks that Im really picky about how people write Azula, and Ive already talked about how much i love how you write Zuko, so its Azulas turn now.

First of all (of the stuff I read anyways) Azulas pov arent written enough.

And the ones there are its even more rare that she actually has like,,, a personality???

like Shes always so robotic and uncomplex in some fics and I cant put into words how refreshing it is to get a change in that. Like this is the first fic ive ever read that I dont absolutely dread Azula povs.

(I feel the need to say whenever I compare taob to other fics in these I'm never intending to put the other authors down, im just stating the differences in my specific preferences. Like im all for writers doing what they want in their fics, but the way you write align so well with what i like to read its uncanny sometimes)

Azula is such a difficult character, and you write her so well. Youre phenomenal, I love it.

Like shes by far my favorite thing about this so far.

I love her and Zukos dedication and codependancy. And also how well they ended up being able to read each other and how well they flow with each other. Its so different from their cannon relationship.

I think they should have let you write the comics.

Isnt there a new Azula comic coming out soon??????????/ They should let you write it. Your amazing with her.

You capture the complexity of their relationship so well, and like acknowledging how strained and toxic they were at the palace vs now, its so good, I love it so much.

My second favorite thing about tams, like i mentioned, is all of Sokka and Zukos interactions. They were so funny and honestly had me cackling.

I liked the whole 'Azula and Sokka are similar and so are Katara and Zuko' thing, because its true. I've always seen them as sort of parallels of each other. Its nice to see this acknowledged.

I saw that you answered some of my other ask things recently and the one where I was responding to what I think was the last chapter of Taob had me laughing because I had no idea it was that long when I sent it in. Sorry for making you read all that.

I have a process for writing these and a part of it is that I usually write it in a doc first and then copy and paste it into the ask thing and then read through it to make sure it makes sense. And sometimes when im rereading it Ill add a lot of stuff and I didnt realize how much I added with that particular ask.

I saw it and I just kept scrolling and scrolling and it was really funny to me.

I usually take screenshots when you answer them so i can remember what i have or havent talked about and that specific ask is like 14 screenshots of just the stuff I sent.

And im doing that again with this one.

Anywho im responding to some of your comments on my asks because i can.

"No you didnt send me an ask off anon but I wish you would"

never. I would rather die.

the whole your economics degree makes you feel stupid thing. theres a really popular saying thats like 'if you try to teach a fish to climb a tree it will spend its whole life thinking its stupid' or something like that. that part of your response reminded me of that.

"I want to know what your talking about with the kind thing"

Again, never. Absolutely not.

Theres another part i wanted to respond to but i cant remember now so oh well.

I know i always say that im not sure if these make sense but i actually mean it this time because im really tired. so have fun interpreting this.

OMG LIST ANON HI HI HI HOW ARE YOU <33333

i also love lihua it's kinda funny how many people were suspicious of her initially bc i genuinely dont know WHY idk if it's bc people just dont trust me or we're all overly cynical but i was getting comments and asks like 'i dont trust lihua' and im here like WHY THAT'S MY BABYGIRL

bribe me. do it. (no really dont i cant believe u tried to send me money just to take care of myself 😭)

as for the taob parallel thing, that wasn't on purpose! i really cant see myself putting ANY taob references in tams just bc i want them to be separate like i dont want all of my atla works from now on to be compared to taob bc that's. not gonna end well for me LMAO

"You have a specific post I keep seeing on pinterest, (and i saw it on facebook one time, that was surreal,) (im pretty sure its you) its the one where its like enemy to lover" NOOOOOOOOOO

i love how season 1 sokka's justification for very baltantly flirting with the firebender is literally to he's not like other girlsify him. sound logic there king

"like Shes always so robotic and uncomplex in some fics and I cant put into words how refreshing it is to get a change in that. Like this is the first fic ive ever read that I dont absolutely dread Azula povs." GOD TIER COMPLIMENT IM KISSING YOU RN i love love LOVE tams azula like i love her as a character i love writing her i love how it tests me a bit just love love love her and seeing how well she's been received in general has been such a pleasant surprise <3 do not even MENTION comic azula to me im so sad for her

"Sorry for making you read all that." please never apologise for these asks they make me very happy :)

"if you try to teach a fish to climb a tree it will spend its whole life thinking its stupid' or something like that." that's actually very fitting, thank you <3

get some sleep!!!!

thank you for this ask as always my love my light my cutie patootie xx

[davestriderascend]

the homestuck reread, pt 5

ive apparently finished what the map is deeming "part 3", and there are starting to be. a lot of subacts. and i am having a hard time remembering them all. and the map doesnt mark the subacts. so im just going to recap up to the end of part 3 now, before the act 6 act 6 nonsense sets in in full.

heres the previous recap if you missed it (meenahbound), and heres the first one if youre new.

Act 6 Act 4

this is the subact where the alpha kids enter their session! we are introduced to their planets, given a little glimpse of what theyve been up to, and their imprisoned jack noir gives us a wonderful little tally showing us exactly how much time has passed between their entry and when their adventure next picks up (153 days, with their adventure starting 11/11, and ending 4/13, so like five months). its super short and like nothing happens. moving on

Act 6 Intermission 4

breaking slightly from the previous pattern of a6 intermissions checking up on literally everything non-alpha kid related happening, this entire intermission is devoted to caliborns brand new session as he argues with hussie, shoots gamzee a lot, and is generally a tool.

The Characters

its in this act that hussie talks to caliborn about the consequences of him killing callie. basically, in killing her, hes stunted his own growth so that he will never reach his full potential as an adult, bc he didnt dominate in the traditional way. this is probably why lord english isnt shown with wings, the way other adult cherubs are. they also talk a lot about how this has impacted caliborns session and made it unique, (and they continue to talk about this in all of caliborns intermissions,) but im not gonna get into that here. caliborn is kind of implied in this act to have some kind of learning disability? which is. hm. its not framed great im gonna be real.

hes still a tool, hes still creepy, he shoots gamzee a lot and theres a whole elevatorstuck bit in this act that made me laugh really hard, but otherwise theres nothing else to say here.

Act 6 Act 5 Act 1

this is where we start getting into the sub sub acts. this is also where 99% of the alpha kids session stuff happens. everything with the alpha kid sprites is here, the jake, dirk, and jane mess, The hal and dirk conversation, and roxy briefly getting jailed by condy and discovering the void ring. this is also where calliope is first revealed hiding in the furthest ring. a6a5a1 is actually split into two separate parts, so im just talking about the first part here (yeah, i know).

The Plot

the jake, dirk, and jane mess is infamous. its hard to believe that all of that drama literally just happens in this one fucking act. even more so, its all contained more or less in three fucking pesterlogs. fr. people have so many opinions on this shit, i am just literally going to copypaste the relevant logs, even! youre welcome!

this is the majority of the really potent stuff. the way it reads to me, jake and dirk started dating when they entered the medium, and have been dating for the past five months, until jake suddenly stopped talking to dirk and dipped. jane mentions that jake has complained about dirk to her more and more over the past few months, and asked her less and less about how she was doing, so shes basically stopped contacting him altogether. dirks role in this act is virtually nonexistent, so we dont get any idea of how hes feeling about this until his conversation with hal, wherein he blames hal for scaring jake off w hals machinations in getting them into the medium, and hal says that blaming him is just a way of dirk trying to cope with the fact that he blames himself.

the reality is the alpha kids session gets very little screentime. we have no idea what really happened during those five months, and we never get to know. but it is worth noting that these kids are extremely isolated, and this is also dirk and jakes very first relationship ever. its going to be very new, very confusing, and there is also a lot at stake if they break up and dont stay friends, especially if it ripples out to the larger friendgroup. im sure all of that has a huge impact on the way they handle things and the way it explodes at the end.

personally, i find the parallel between jake and jane to be the most interesting thing here. while jake repeatedly checks in with jane to make sure hes not driving her nuts, and dirk checks in with jake to ask if he needs space, both jake and jane, instead of communicating their problems, refuse to say anythign about them. they avoid the issue and let it fester, pulling back from the relationships until they both have a lot of resentment for the other party. in both cases, that resentment explodes- with jake going no contact with dirk, and jane blowing up at jake. theyre really bad communicators, honestly.

The Characters

when i talked about roxy in a6a2, i was pretty harsh, and i said all of that keeping in mind that iw ould be revisiting her here. in a6a5a1, roxy gets sober. and when she is sober, she is so kind, and thoughtful, and strong, with a great love for her friends and a deep fear that she isnt worthy of them. she has a close relationship with fefeta, and its through her talking about fefeta that we actually learn about fefeta, given that feferi, nepeta, and fefeta never speak from the moment of fefetas introduction. she admires her mom, and is so excited and nervous to meet her in person, and her mom is actually the reason she decides to give up alcohol! she wanted to be a person her mom could be proud of. i just. i love roxy so much she really is the best shes so kind to all of her friends and sweet w callie and shes also so fucking funny and i just. love her.

dirk continues his pattern of not being there much, mostly. his big moment in this act is his conversation with hal. apparently, he has literally not prototyped his sprite this entire fucking time bc he promised hal hed prototype him but doesnt want to and theyve been arguing about it nonstop for five months. insane shit. he had to bribe gamzee to keep gamzee from dumping random shit in, and he prototypes hal on the day that stops working. anyway, the conversation that takes place between him and hal in this act is one of my favorite moments in all of homestuck, its just so cool and theres really nothing else to say about it. if you havent seen this animation of their conversation you should bc its iconic

jake is... kind of a terrible friend, in this act. just objectively. the reality is, jake REALLY struggles with social cues and shit. hes just fucking terrible with people. he has no idea when jane is uncomfortable, no matter how obvious jane makes it, he has no balls when it comes to communicating with dirk, he makes all of his conversations with jane and erisol about himself (and kind of roxy, too??), and just. jesus christ. everything about his relationship with erisol actually is really really bad. its like what some people THINK john and davesprites relationship is like. idk thats like 99% of my takeaway from this act and i genuinely love him but this isnt a strong act for him

there are things to be said about jane, but i think ill hold off for a bit.

fefetasprite, as ive already mentioned, we pretty much exclusively hear about through roxys reencounters of who she is. she likes to gossip, and shes given roxy a ton of advice. apparently, in one on one conversations, shes a hell of a chatter box, btu seems to clam up in public for some reason. hussies always had kind of a running joke in the formsprings and whatnot about "a million worthless dead nepetas" and how, in the grand scheme of things, most of the characters introduced in hivebent arent important and will never be important, and it just kind of feels like fefeta not talking is an extension of that.

arquius is arrogant, and leans even harder into brodude type language than dirk and hal. hes casual, but full of himself and commanding, fully enthused to the max about both equius and hals interests (which have a decent amount of overlap anyway). he defers to dirk, commands dirk, and commands dirk to command him in equal and contradicting measure. hes really pumped about having a physical form, and even more pumped that that form is so RIIIIIIPPED, and believes that he is a sort of ultimate lifeform as a combination of machine and man. they experience a level of cohesion we dont see from the other doublesprites like tavris and erisol, and the only real instance where they seem to disagree is due to hals horror over equius's classism and behavior towards nepeta. arquius's name, interestingly, seems to imply that the name "hal" was in fact a joke all along, and that hal- or ar, i should say- does really consider ar to be his name. anyway, the bottom line is that arquius is fucking hilarious.

erisolsprite, like tavris, is made of two trolls that dont get along. however, eridan loves to bitch and moan, and sollux is ridiculously apathetic all the time, so hes continued to exist regardless. he hates everything, he complains almost constantly, he seems to enjoy complaining constantly, hes apathetic about jake and whatever the alpha kids are up to, but enjoys being a btich about it just enough to give jake a daily double bird. jake is a huge asshole to him and doesnt take him seriously at all, and despite that he still deigns to give jake advice sometimes?? erisol is hilarious tho and hes such a fun quirky chara and i love him a lot

Act 6 Act 5 Act 2

the trickster act. all things trickster happen right here. alllll of the things. dirk breaks up with jake, both arquius and erisol try to apologize to fefeta, and fefeta spritesplodes. they all get hella drunk and eventually crash sometime later on their sacrificial slabs.

The Plot

trickstermode is a fucking nightmare and i kind of hate it and i really hate everything its spawned in the fandom. did you know the tricksters dont have any kind of candy theme at all? i didnt. i fucking forgot. bc fandom. fucking anything seems to turn ppl trickster, also, and not just nonconsensual makeouts. jane kicks jake in the crotch. roxy gets a pumpkin smashed over her head. how did fanon fall so far

Act 6 Act 5 Act 1 Pt 2

after they crash, we return right back to act 1, swearing that well never speak of a6a5a2 again. there are a lot of big important conversations that happen here between the alpha kids. their sessions jack becomes jack english and hic becomes more aggressive in her takeover, and the insuing chaos causes the kids to go godtier, with the act ending with jane going crockertier and jade going grimbark.

The Characters

roxy talks a lot about her fears and insecurities in this act. its one of the strongest acts for her, honestly, and a lot of what makes me really love her so much.

like me, dirk also spends a lot of time in this act talking about how fucking much he loves roxy. roxy is TERRIFIED shes let him down, but all he can talk about is how much he adores and admires her, and how she means the whole world to him. he admits that he doesnt think he could ever kill her, for any reason, and looking back at previous acts we see a lot of examples of dirk risking everything to keep her safe over and over again. their relationship is so fucking important to me you dont even understand

i said id talk about jane later, and later is now. this act feels like a really good resolution for her re: jake. she and dirk FINALLY cut the shit and talk through their problems, and honestly, theyre REALLY good friends and their relationship is really sweet. unlike jake, who doesnt seem to have the balls to speak to anybody but roxy (hes dealing with a lot of self realizations rn, tbf to him), jane reaches out to roxy and dirk to talk through her problems and theirs, solidifying her friendships with both of them in a way thats really touching. jane, at her worst, can be stubborn and avoidant, choosing to let resentment fester over causing conflict or distance her friends to avoid harsh truths. but at her best, shes bold and clever, and a hard worker, willing to put in the effort to make things right.

Act 6 Intermission 5

this is where i started losing track of sub shit. intermission 5 follows the usual pattern of intermissions, with a check in on where the meteor and ship players are at as their journey comes to an end. it also follows the dreambubble players and their adventure, and what spades is up to. its during this intermission that the album cherubim is released, and act 6 officially passes act 5 in length.

however, the thing about this intermission is that its frequently interrupted by intermission intermissions featuring caliborns session, updating us on where hes at. so in keeping with that, ill summarize this intermission while also randomly interjecting with caliborns intermissions.

The Plot

the act opens on the meteor, with karkat planning an intervention for terezi with dave. while karkat is getting steadily more worried about terezi, as her mental health obviously begins to decline in tandem with her relationship with gamzee, dave is growing steadily more worried about rose, who spends a lot of her time drunk these days, which is negatively impacting her relationship with kanaya.

Act 6 Intermission 5 Intermission 1

caliborn has begun his session properly and is working on conquering planets. each planet is knocked into a black hole in order, billiards style, and after completing each other he gets a new leprechaun.

the battleship has landed on jakes planet. davesprite tries unsuccessfully to wake a sleeping john, and then monologues for a while about his experience on the battleship and how much he hates himself, before just fucking off and leaving

Act 6 Intermission 5 Intermission 2

caliborn has unlocked more planets. he thinks the leprechauns are annoying and their powers are lame.

at this part of a6i5, john meets up with vriska, meenah, and aranea, who have teamed up and put all of their plans together. right now, theyre searching for vriskas treasure, and vriskas put a little pirate crew together, which eventually includes feferi and nepeta post fefetasplosion. aranea tells a long story about calliope and caliborns parents.

Interfishin

meenah has to pee, and the pirate crew plays elevatorstuck

aranea continues her story and talks a lot about cherub biology. we see that gamzee had a role in raising the cherubs. aranea goes on to talk about caliborns dead session, and how he got to the point of conquering planets like we saw earlier, and the deal he made with his denizen. aranea talks a lot about leprechauns and charms.

meanwhile back at the ranch, dave and karkat are now talking to terezi about her relationship to gamzee, her guilt over vriska, her insecurity, and her newfound sight and regret over it. dave wins karkat tantrum bingo.

Act 6 Intermission 5 Intermission 3

caliborn and hussie discuss crowbars usefulness and caliborns eighth planet. clover hits on caliborn.

the pirate crew is almost to the treasure. john questions vriskas sanity and morality, while aranea tells a story about the rings of void and life. most of the pirate crew decide theyre sick of vriska being an asshole and dip, and vriska gives a long speech justifying her actions that has lived in my brain rent free ever since i read it for the very first time in 2015. i love her so much.

on the meteor, rose and kanaya get in a fight about roses alcoholism and the way shes continuously let the people around her down as a result.

Act 6 Intermission 5 Intermission 4

the leprechauns are all flirting with each other a lot.

meenah has a bit of a breakdown about how much she loves her friends and her life in the bubbles and how she doesnt actually really want to follow in the footsteps of hic. they find the treasure, before the story cuts suddenly to the adventures of viceroy bubbles von salamancer, which is 10/10 adorable and hilarious. the treasure is revealed to be the house symbol, and john sticks his arm in it, getting his teleporty canon fuckery powers.

Act 6 intermission 5 Intermission 5

caliborn complains about the leprechauns and hussie complains about vriska.

spades takes over the felt as their new leader, stuffs them all in an oven, and winds up in the furthest ring with a growing cast of characters (dirk, jack english, and eventually bec noir and pm). john keeps jumping around the canon and seems to love con air again

Act 6 Intermission 5 Intermission 6

caliborn is on his last planet and has come up w a plan to use his sessions jack to destroy the queen, planning to dispose of jack afterward. hussie isnt responding to his messages anymore, which pisses him off.

john flashes to caliborns location and gets punched into the present, on lomax by the landed battleship. while the kids on the meteor debate how to get off the meteor safely, grimbark jade appears and teleports them all onto lomax where john is. and thats the end!!!

The Characters

i really dont have anything to say here. ill probably talk about vriska and meenahs character development whenever they start dating. its heavily implied in this act that aranea has taught vriska the value of storytelling, while vriskas manipulative behavior has rubbed off on aranea, but ill also probably talk about that later.

The Album

cherubim is a themed album that centers around calliope and caliborn (obviously), and reminds me a little of prospit & derse in that the songs are presented in pairs, with opposing takes on the same general theme. red sucker is probably my favorite on the album, it goes hard as hell. i wasnt expecting to enjoy the album as much as i did! its great

Final Thoughts

with this so finishes "part three" whatever the fuck that even is within the vast context of homestuck. act 6 act 6, i remember well, is its own kind of monster with a gazillion subacts and shit, so i think it just makes sense to hold off on talking about that until another post. maybe my next one will be after the retcon? stuffs really picking up, and characters are getting a lot more fleshed out, so its a lot of fun to read rn. if like, so long.

EDIT: I COMPLETELY FORGOT but at SOME POINT during all of this the tumblr stoppedupdating. i dont fucking know when. anything i had to say about it i already said in the last post tho tbh. its fine. its nice. infinitely better than the formspring

edit: a6a6-the end of hs proper

[tacagen]

just came back to this and realized i really formulated it vaguely so you cant even say what i actually implied. elaborating: his ASS was CONVICTED after his first fight with barry and 100% on all the news since 'nothing ever happens in this damn time'!! his NAME is DIRECTLY LINKED TO THE REVERSE-FLASH IN THE ARCHIVES RIGHT BEFORE F*NISH L*NE!! NOT MENTIONING HIS 21ST CENTURY HISTORIC ACTIVITY(tho idk how exactly that works considering there are variants where reverse-flash's identity didnt make it to 25th century but there should be SO much documentation in 1 iron heights 2 ccpd+court since there mustve been trials to put him there in the first place 3 flash museum as it already existed in 21st century, using the information from 2 other sources above (which well. above all must be completely digitalized by 4 freakin centuries after. like cmon TF were they up to for that entire time if it didnt include making the info easier to access/find/etc at least once) so i cant see how that could possibly happen except for eo throwin all that shit fuck outta window at some point to keep the mystery for his pre-reverse era but then again he still needs all that info to check his own history and all the changes and it was shown to be in the archives (collected by other people before him) so? man i wish timey wimey actually made at least some sense in at least 1 flash variant. is it really too much to ask.)!! NO WAY THE KNOWLEDGE IS NOT PUBLIC!! EVERYBODY KNOWS!! ESPECIALLY PEOPLE WHO KNEW HIM FROM HIS PRE-SPEEDSTER ERA!! NOT EVEN MENTIONING THE MUSEUM STAFF SOME OF WHICH FALL ON THE PREVIOUS SPECTRUM AS WELL!!!! AND NO ONE CAN DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT CAUSE THE ONLY PRISON CAPABLE OF HOLDING SOMEONE OF HIS SPECTRE OF POWERS AGAINST THEIR WILL WAS BUILT BY HIM FOR PARADOX SINCE APPARENTLY HE IS THE ONLY COMPETENT PERSON OUT THERE and, well. thawne is obvs not stupid enough to include in the design his own cell (btw. does this mean that thawne as a time travelling time altering genius TM could be the one responsible for the complete incompetence and poor anti-meta/speedster equipment of police/gov forces/etc and lack of means of detention around his time so that he can do his silly little museum work and scheming (AND get to be the hero in case some outside force attacks since again no other compenent people and actual means of defence but him//renegades created by him and hunter??) and well. generally existing peacefully without worrying about getting imprisoned here too considering that even 21st century iron heights does, in fact, have the necessary kinds of technologies and use it successfully on meena and august and whoever else (not mentioning it was PERFECTLY CAPABLE to contain thawne himself for some time) because there REALLY is no other fucking explanation on how THOSE of ALL things are lost and forgotten in 25th as well.). the central city of 25th century just has to live with the fact there is this murderous speedster that still works a normal job, can do pretty much anything with the city and time itself (but actually usually doesnt because hes hyperfixated and busy running his precious museum but yk threat is still there.) and no one can stop him from it and with being fully aware of it all. also if it wasnt enough at least PART if not majority of 25th century public actually thinks he IS a hero after the paradox's defeat. the internet arguments about him must be unmatched. also i think he (and his museum tours especially) is an obscure tourist attraction now. like cc's people at this point be like look at our local little deranged squeak squeak from the flash museum that basically owns the city and can do whatever he wants and also dies an unreasonable amount of times regularly. his appearance was foretold by flash's history because that rat can time travel and you can literally see him both on display and explaining all that including his involvemet live on his museum tours. so silly. so fucking insane. where else could you possibly have this.

typed some Thoughts in the tags but then realized it should be a separate post.

[just-some-random-blogger]

meowmeow, lovie!! good morning/day/evening! im sorry i suppose ill be late today too bc its already 4:30 and i still have an essay to write *clown emoji aka me* nvm i deicided to write it during the lessons. 'i was kinda sad yesterday so when you didnt message me' im sososO sorry love TT i hope you read it during the day at least and im making you a company. 'i refuse to watch doctor who' well we'll see... or you in particular... AAAH im waiting for the song sm!! you always look pretty! tbh im waiting for any content you publish!! im so honored you ask me for a song to sing TT omg im crying im soso touched TT im not so cruel to ask you to learn a russian song nono. what kind of song do you want? idk about professional traits but if you tell me, next time ill give you some variants. since you mentioned russian songs, i recalled a song named 'russian princess' (it has english subs if you want to listen!) actually i feel so cool listening to it hghls. especially since i got into hotd. i feel not exactly like a royalty but you know this feeling of being special and just in tune with yourself? tbh i found this song a year or 2 ago and i associate it with the other events. also it has some witchy vibes as for me. andand!! was this # about my witch au? if you got it, you got it. no pressure, just curious. 'i would say i have no chill and am quite radical' nah i wasnt saying you ARE chill and hippie. but that you have such an image in the internet. tbh i want to go to protests but... im not afraid of getting hurt but ruining my whole life *star eyes* there was a guy who was walking NEAR the place where a demonstration was happening and.. hes been imprisoned <з lovely isnt it? universities were expelling their students for taking part in the protests. sorry i got carried away. good to know you have such a rebellious posture. i love you saint hannah TT youre so sweet <з 'i try not to think about that too much cos ill cry' ive been crying by the middle of the sentence. 'when we say we’re going to eat rice that means were eating a meal' oooh i got you. we have a tradition of eating bread with every meal but 1) its not the same thing 2) its not really strong among young people. its fine, you explained it pretty understandable. papak sounds cute. ig we have an equivalent. 'I HAVE SO MUCH MORE I WANT TO SHARE' YEEEY im always hear to listen to it! WOW its so really very very interesting to learn about this saying twice thing!! we also say things twice sometimes for the same reason or to just create a new meaning. i crave learning more about filipino! yeah i didnt know what is flan. 1) but tbh some people dont even see russia as europe.. even geographically... 2) its not a common dish in slavik countries (eastern at least). like we have a quite similar thing but it has a completely different name. 'i think it derived from spanish??' yeah its probably just my association. we dont have such constructions to unit words so it always sounds foreign. esp words like this. a silly stereotype but it gives me some old movie about mafia vibes. its also said in a deep af brutal voice in the beginning of a movie. 'I HAVE TO EXPLAIN THIS PERFECTLY BECAUSE' omg its cute. thanks <з love your big brain ooh kare-kare looks good. a hottie fdklfjd. please let me answer it in the second part bc 1)im running out of symbols 2) i wanna sleep 3) ill answer you during the day i swear TT ive got so many things to do it scares me.. just remember that im here! have a good day!! good luck with the classes and all! take care<з

HELOO LOVE

im ready T_T i might just type everything i lost last night

im sorry i suppose ill be late today too bc its already 4:30 and i still have an essay to write *clown emoji aka me* nvm i deicided to write it during the lessons. 'i was kinda sad yesterday so when you didnt message me' im sososO sorry love TT i hope you read it during the day at least and im making you a company.

T_T it's ok i told you not to apologize ur not the reason i was sad but i was hoping to talk to you. T_T its ok as long as you reply im good u have a life beyond tumblr girl its fine. here are your clown emojis 🤡🤡🤡 please take care of yourself

'i refuse to watch doctor who' well we'll see... or you in particular... AAAH im waiting for the song sm!!

ive been meaning to watch the episode with the 10th and 11th doctor with my mummy but T_T there's no subtitles T_T and matt like mumbling in the beginning and we dont have a speaker and T_T sad RIP maybe i'll at least watch that episode

you always look pretty! tbh im waiting for any content you publish!!

T_T Спасибо, любимый

im so honored you ask me for a song to sing TT omg im crying im soso touched TT im not so cruel to ask you to learn a russian song nono. what kind of song do you want? idk about professional traits but if you tell me, next time ill give you some variants. since you mentioned russian songs, i recalled a song named 'russian princess' (it has english subs if you want to listen!)

geez i listened to this song before fully reading your reply and T_T i thought it was the song you wanted me to sing so i was like DAMN ITS GOOD but then i realized i slowly regretted saying id sing anything for you even if its in russian T_T ALSO I CANT MAKE THE BACKING TRACK/MUSIC ITS EDM AINT NO ONE GOT TIME FOR THAT but now that ive read this in its entirety im glad your not making me sing it but HAHAH YOU KNOW I ALREADY LOOKED UP THE LYRICS AND GOT THE ROMANIZED RUSSIAN AHAHHAHAHAHAHHHAHAH i'll try to learn it it has an interesting melody but lol we'll see HAAHAHH

the genre im mostly drawn to has rock vibes but i like all music to a certain degree so pls i hope its english (or filipino HAHHAH)

actually i feel so cool listening to it hghls. especially since i got into hotd. i feel not exactly like a royalty but you know this feeling of being special and just in tune with yourself? tbh i found this song a year or 2 ago and i associate it with the other events. also it has some witchy vibes as for me.

i see it really does have have quite a strong ambiance so i can understand why you are drawn to it. i actually like this song! i love how you describe your feeling with music, this is how i feel about music. btw... are you in high school? i- i suddenly tried to think of what youre studying but i cant ?? think of anything omg T_T [are you a minor] YOURE NOT RIGHT? arent you 19? T_T HELP

andand!! was this # about my witch au? if you got it, you got it. no pressure, just curious.

YES and no but yes but idk i wanted to write it but now i dont T_T it be like that

'i would say i have no chill and am quite radical' nah i wasnt saying you ARE chill and hippie. but that you have such an image in the internet.

HAHHAAH BUT THAT LITERALLY MEANS YOU THINK IM A CHILL HIPPIE HAHAHAHAAHA

tbh i want to go to protests but... im not afraid of getting hurt but ruining my whole life *star eyes*

im not going to give you star emojis because i think you mean your are ok with yourself getting hurt and i dont support that

there was a guy who was walking NEAR the place where a demonstration was happening and.. hes been imprisoned <з lovely isnt it? universities were expelling their students for taking part in the protests. sorry i got carried away. good to know you have such a rebellious posture.

not really rebellious per se, more of like i think its necessary to speak out against the status quo if the status quo is bad and harmful and anti-people and pro-elite etc. i hope that guy is ok. ✊

i love you saint hannah TT youre so sweet <з

lol thanks idk what i feel about the nickname but i love you <3

'i try not to think about that too much cos ill cry' ive been crying by the middle of the sentence.

T_T

'when we say we’re going to eat rice that means were eating a meal' oooh i got you. we have a tradition of eating bread with every meal but 1) its not the same thing 2) its not really strong among young people. its fine, you explained it pretty understandable.

tbh i wouldnt call it a tradition its like a social norm to eat rice... ig culture? is more appropriate. its nice that you have parallelism with bread. and omg young people dont lke bread AHAHHA that's ? so funny lol its weird to think yall just out there eating .... idk fried chicken T_T DAMN WITH NO RICE T_T

papak sounds cute. ig we have an equivalent.

T_T HAHAHA what's the equivalent?

'I HAVE SO MUCH MORE I WANT TO SHARE' YEEEY im always hear to listen to it!

OK im going to take this oppurtunity to talk to you again about sandman because that was the highlight of my message before i ctrl zed but FIRST LET ME SAVE THIS AS A DRAFT

ok were safe team

OK so yesterday ??? or was it yester NO IT WAS YESTERDAY i went to the library and read the chonky sandman megabig comic and i absolute loved the issue with Nada and Dream

now i have a new perspective in this because i feel like i was internally misogynistic towards Nada after watching this video about likable female characters (you dont have to watch it but this channel is very nice) anyway this vid basically talked about how female characters are only 'good' if they're likeable whereas male characters can be good regardless of that and it made me think about this issue cos i felt more sympathy towards dream than nada and at one point i had feelings of annoyance with nada but Lasflahsf NOW i cant remember if it was before i read that issue or after but i recall having catharsis over how i treated nada after typing my thoughts about it to you

anyway as im typing this now, i also realized that its ok for me not to feel that much feelings at all towards nada because i mean i had been following dream throughout the other issues so its not weird to have me have stronger feelings about dream rather than nada

but anyway, i still felt that both of them were problematic in their own way and i'll just quickly go through why and why i love that issue the most

so nada ^^^^ is dream's first love T_T [CRYING] solely because [CRYING] she was the only person who said they loved him and actually sought him out [CRYING] MANS SUPER HUNGRY FOR LOVE AND COMPANIONSHIP ITS SO SAD and yeah because of that dream was like LASFHASFHAL I LOVE YOU TOO NADA I WANT YOU TO BE QUEEN OF THE DREAMING T_T [CRYING]

but like stupid mortals be T_T [sigh] nada, who had been warned by a bird king not to seek out the 'man' she was in love with because he was NOT a man was like 'but i still love him' then met dream, had the whole be my queen shebang and when she realized he was not human she was AW SHIT BIRD KING WAS RIGHT (bird king is a literal bird btw AHHHA) and was like dream we cant be together im sorry i was stupid pls let me go this is bad

but dream was like [pls i love you T_T i want you pls i need love]

[CRYING]

so nada desperately goes through all these things to evade dream the worst of which is she even defiles herself by taking her maidenhood WITH A ROCK (it's not to say that a woman impure because she is not a virgin or that she is anything based on their virginity bUT I SAY DEFILE BECAUSE DAMN THAT FUCKING HURTS AND SHE WAS SO DESPERATE TO REPEL DREAM TO DO THAT) but dream is like T_T social constructs such as this matter not to me im not a human pls i love you i want you be my queen

{CRYING}

AND POOR FUCKING NADA SHES LIKE ON HER KNEES BEGGING BUT DREAM FUCKING BEING DREAM IS LIKE PLSSSSSSSSSSSS but ig also he's kinda hot cos nada was like ok thats kinda hot that you dgaf about social norms so they make love on top of the mountain

BUT THEN THE FUCKING SUN IS LIKE WHAT IS THIS HERESY WHAT IS THIS ABSOLUTE SIN THAT A MORTAL AND AN ENDLESS HAVE SHARED UNION THEN FUCKING BURNS NADA'S ENTIRE VILLAGE ////:

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ idk thats fucking petty of the sun if it was so bad it shudda burned nada no? but then again nada is the princess of the tribe so 😬😬😬😬😬🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 its cold hard reality the people have to suffer for their rulers' mistakes

and so when they woke nada was like ???? my people are dead T_T CRYING FUCK then jumps of the cliff and dies

NOW THIS PETTY FUCK DREAM COMES TO HER AND IS LIKE nada i love you then you betrayed me (ok this isnt the petty part because she willingly had sex with him on that mountain) then hes like youre choosing death over me (death is dreams sister so he was 100% jelly over this) and nada is like pls my people are dead because of me let me go

this is the part where i think well yeah theyre dead youre dead just be with dream forgetting that guilt exists lol AHHAHAHA

THIS IS THE PART WHERE DREAM IS PETTY COS HE WAS LIKE for betraying me i will punish you BUT if you agree to be my queen i;ll forgive you i;ll only ask you 3 times if you deny me 3 times im going to condemn you to fucking hell //////:

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

he petty AF for that wtf

so nada obviously is like no no pls dont make me say no again so dont ask me but DREAM PETTY AF AND I THINK THE COMIC EVEN SAID SOME SHIT ABOUT THAT AND SO DREAM

ASKED HER ANYWAY

and she said no and now she's in fucking HELLL AND BEEN IN HELL FOR MILLENIA

in one of the earlier issues + in the show dream sees nada when he goes to hell and asks him to release her and i think nada asks if he loves him and dream is smth like its been thousands of years of course i still love you BUT i stilll havent forgiven you T_T PETTY RAT

and i remember when i watched that i was like DAMN WHAT DID SHE DO HE PETTY AF and now that i know im like i see it but also he petty AF

UHH TEN THOUSAND YEARS THIS RAT PETTY AF

[end scene]

WOW its so really very very interesting to learn about this saying twice thing!! we also say things twice sometimes for the same reason or to just create a new meaning.

AW THATS CUTE HAHAHAH love that for us #russianssecretlyfilipino #filipinossecretlyrussian

i crave learning more about filipino!

OK OK LETS FINALLY TALK ABOUT JOSE RIZAL

this is him. it might not look like it but hes the original fuck boy HAHHAHA man had girlfriends all over the globe like pitbull who? he aint mr worldwide JOSE RIZAL is mr worldwife HAHHA LOL I TYPED THAT ON ACCIDENT AND SO REAL FINGERS SO REAL tho he never had a wife so /: HAHHAA

anyway he became the national hero because his work inspired the revolution and he did so with non violence so. i personally have a soft spot for andres bonifacio (the other candidate for national hero) but thats for another time

this andres btw

aNYWAY his most prolific works are 'noli mi tangere' which means 'touch me not' in spanish or 'like do not translate me' then its sequel 'el filibusterismo' or 'the Filibuster' in spanish whatever the fuck that means ok wikipedia says its It is sometimes referred to as "talking a bill to death" or "talking out a bill", and is characterized as a form of obstruction in a legislature or other decision-making body. whatever that means HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

so yeah he got killed for writing that lol cos he wrote it in spanish cos fuck you spain and then spain was like (: pew pew and shot him and he was like FUCK YOU YOURE NOT GOING TO SHOOT ME IN THE BACK IM GOING TO FACE YOU but he died before he could look at the firing squad so /:

side note the right pic is at rizal park which was where he was killed (it was renamed after him) and i remember going there for a field trip and being absolutely enamored by the story teller/tour guide who said the whole story and said the command by the spanish and the statues FIRED AT RIZAL AND I HAD A HEARTATTACK THEN AFTER IT ALL I WAS LIKE WOAH THAT WAS MEGA COOL but i dont remember what the spanish command was T_T rip i wish i knew so i could tell you any everyone else i want to tell this story to

HAHAHAH anyway unlike other works before jose rizal which was propaganda against the spanish, the works before rizal were like only allussions to opression but never direct. whereas rizal was like oh you see these spanish priests and all the governors THEYRE FUCKING L also you see how they treat the poor and farmers and fucking RAPE OUR WOMEN (: YALL ARE L FUCK YOU

and spain was like ? no fuck YOU bang bang (in before imprisoning him i think he only lived to be 30?) then after he died the revolutionaries called the katipuneros which is derived from (Dont freak out) the KKK (which means kataastaasan (the highest of the high) kagalanggalangang (the most respectable) katipunan (? like group or association, but also because of them katipunan kind of has this meaning of revolutionary or i guess to me) were like HELL NO LETS FUCKING GO SPAIN YOU WANT A PIECE OF THIS FUCK YOU

(this is my absolute fav monument i remember seeing it for the first time as a child i was like DAMN THAT SWORD FUCKING LIT)

I MUST SAY the first time i heard of other KKK was in the black eyed peas song 'where is the love' and i was like HEY they dont like the kkk? why dont they like the kkk? how do they even know them? they fought for out freedom thats so mean of them not to like them in before my older brother said YOU IDIOT THAT NOT THE KKK THEYRE TALKING ABOUT T_T rip

enough of that

noli (we call it that so its short) basically follows this dude named crisostomo ibarra. in the first book he's just come home from abroad and is like i love it here then slowly is like WTF IS WRONG WITH EVERYONE WHY IS THIS HAPPENING and ... tbh its been a while i dont remember its entirety... but he fall in love with maria clara and theres this freaky rat ass priest that has ??? the hots for her but ??? hES SECRETLY HER FUCKING DAD? COS HE RAPED MARIAS MOM and maria also gets raped im not sure by who tho but FUCK THAT PRIEST (a priest rapes her) yeah its all very FUCK YOU she joins the convent because of that and i think because yeah crisostomo dies and shes like </3 i will never recover never love again

honestly dont quote me on this i could be getting so much wrong

then part 2 which is el fili (again shorted cos its too long) crisostomo ibarra who fucking dies in p1 comes back from the dead (cos he never died fr) as simoun and is like I DONT WANT PEACE I WANT PROBLEMS ALWAYS and plans to blow up a church or smth BECAUSE FUCK YOU SPAIN (honestly i cant remember) and marias like my beloved crisostomo T_T please come back to me and simoun is like WAIT WAIT IM COMING but maria is like fuck this shit and jumps off a fucking church cos life sucks

yeah the end thats about as much as i remember from the main plot but the books talk about a lot of social injustices too

my favorite (or should i even call it that T_T) is the piece about Cabesang Tales who is a farmer took barren land and made it fruitful and it took so long for it to be fruitful his wife and daughter died of fucking poverty then the church was like actually peasant this land belongs to God and by god i mean us gtfo this land and Cabesang Tales who was the picture of patience fucking snapped and was like FUCKING WORK YOUR BLEED BLOOD AND FIX THE LAND THEN BURRY YOUR WIFE AND CHILD HERE FIRST THEN AND ONLY THEN WILL I GIVE YOU THIS LAND

then bang (:

anyway they actually made a show about this! for once its not super cringe! its about this modern girl who goes 'back in time' or more like in the book and lives with the characters. i only watched ep1 & 2 and i havent even seen the cutie crisostomo yet so i have plans on watching it but idk when

HIHIHI THIS IS THEM Klay (the reader insert HAHAHAHAH) crisostomo then maria and i think slay <3 its actually available on youtube which is where im watching it but apparently it has no eng subs cos this one korean youtuber was complaining about it so yeah HAHHAHH the turned tables because we love kdramas here in the ph and complain if there arent eng subs on their shows HAHHAHAHA

HOLLUP LEMME JUST SAVE

ok were back this is such a long love letter

[end scene]

yeah i didnt know what is flan. 1) but tbh some people dont even see russia as europe.. even geographically... 2) its not a common dish in slavik countries (eastern at least). like we have a quite similar thing but it has a completely different name.

its ok flan is not paramount to life HAHAHH unless you make flan for a living in which case it is quite important. #1 i mean russia-- SHE 'UGE MASSIVE YEAH so huge she said eurasia and like pluto tiny #2 fair. what is the similar thing?

'i think it derived from spanish??' yeah its probably just my association. we dont have such constructions to unit words so it always sounds foreign. esp words like this.

i see. interesting to know. what about vagon you have that word surely cos i remember watching captain america civil war and it was one of winter soldier's tick words somethingsomething vagon then its translation was like freight train and my mom was like omg thats filipino bagon was like not the train per se but the things connected to the train you get me which i can only assume comes from spanish vagón exists but its wagon according to google so HAHA i got you there

a silly stereotype but it gives me some old movie about mafia vibes. its also said in a deep af brutal voice in the beginning of a movie.

I LOVE THIS STEREOTYPE TBH

'I HAVE TO EXPLAIN THIS PERFECTLY BECAUSE' omg its cute. thanks <з love your big brain

<3 HIHI i love your big brain

ooh kare-kare looks good. a hottie fdklfjd.

HAHAHAH yes it is very good i love it <3 now im hungry T_T

please let me answer it in the second part bc 1)im running out of symbols

thats fine

2) i wanna sleep

valid i will never stop you from listening to your body clock

3) ill answer you during the day i swear TT ive got so many things to do it scares me..

<3 do well my love you got this is can be intimidating but dont worry too much about it you got this! its normal to be anxious but you will overcome it

just remember that im here! have a good day!! good luck with the classes and all! take care<з

i love you so much my dear thank you for being here for me i am likewise also always here for you <3 take care

xxx

[spacexseven]

(4/4) ok rapidfire round cuz i talked about aku and dazai WAAAY too much here are some other guys who work with this

fyodor - this fucker would legit get to the point where he actually fucking tries to kill you, and then a month later you’re just. back in his house. probably tied to a chair while he straddles your lap and pets your hair and coos about how badly he’s yearned for his little golubchik (little dove) since you last parted ways and how glad he was when he heard you were okay and how you guys should totally get married in the eyes of the lord and youre about to have a fucking anuersysm.probably wants to just pretend it Didnt Happen. he’d be very unequipped to deal with Feelings Of Guilt so he assauges it by showering you in affection and gifts and larping as Loving Husband. might tamper with you juuuust a touch so you forget about the whole thing, cuz seeing you flinch and try to get away from him makes his chest all tight and he doesnt Like It so you gotta stop doing it <3

gogol - all my ideas for him are VERY similar to what i already have down for dazai BUT differences are that he doesnt wanna torture you cuz he Dislikes you, he wants to torture you cuz he wants to see your Normal Person-ish reaction to incredible suffering! not only are you going through hellish pain, but it’s being inflicted on someone who you thought cared for you? how ghoulish! your reaction would certainly be one for the books! he gets attached to you probably the same way he did to fyodor, through you making real strides towards understanding him, but your Normal Ways would make him less keen on wanting to murder you and more keen on wanting to stay with you forever and make you his little birdie. you managing to piece together that your bf was actually that clown terrorist youve been hearing so much about DID throw a wrench in things a touch, but hes waaay too impressed with you to be bothered by it! youre even more amazing than he thought! wow! his darling birdie! lets stay together forever! why are you running away come back :(

kouyou - shout out to all my WOMAN LIKERS we got kouyou. gonna have to make this one quick i talked about the russians too much. listen. kouyou? she’s already got some baggage about losing the person she loves to the mafia, so falling for her target is EXTREMELY inconvenient for her. she wants to just ignore her feelings and be rid of you already, to save herself the trouble (insert wont say im in love from hercules somewhere in here), but you’re so... bright. much brighter than she ever thought she’d be able to experience, and you care for her so much… she just cant bring herself to let you slip away. please, dont hate her for bringing you into the darkness with her. she wont let it infect you, she promises! anything and everything to protect her precious light. 

CONCLUSION: im insane

- 🩹

can you tell i'm super biased towards nikolai :< all asks in this au (basically yandere uses the reader to steal info, falls for them as well) are tagged as #spy au 🐟

cw: yandere characters, obsessive behavior, possessive behavior, jealousy, violent threats, murder, forced relationships, kidnapping, imprisonment, manipulation, nikolai has previously pulled out a knife on reader and threatens to kill them.

honestly i don't think fyodor would ever feel guilt for his previous actions. sure, he's roughed you up far too much for the sake of the mission and ruined your life and tortured your friends but all of that was to bring you both together! everything that happened was for the good of your relationship. he always knew you were something special, back when he decided to use you as a way to get information about yokohama's ability users. in fact, he had already decided back then that he would have you join him to fulfill his goal once he gained what he needed to know. you would be useful in a lot of ways, but mostly he wanted you there for a far more selfish reason.

(it did get pretty lonely at the top.)

you thought fyodor was going to kill you after his true intentions were revealed, but waking up to find him holding you like he was cradling the most wonderful thing in the world made you realize you couldn't be more wrong. he had never been to pushy when you met, never asking anything suspicious enough for you to think he was using you. in fact, you only ever met him once every few weeks in a desolate corner when you felt tired from all your work. maybe that false belief that you two were strangers who would never meet at day was what led you to confide in him things you should never have. things you would have gotten killed for revealing if he hadn't already killed your superiors. whatever it was that convinced you to do such a foolish thing, it ruined your life now.

maybe his strange attachment to you wasn't the worst possible outcome. at the very least, there seemed to be hope of you getting out of here alive if his incessant touches and condescending words didn't completely tear you apart.

nikolai is pretty similar to dazai, except he's never been bothered by the job. he likes messing with people, and it helps that you're just to cute! if you're going to freeze every time he places a hand on your back and look all shocked every time he steals a kiss, he's going to actually start liking you, you know? not a temporary arrangement, like in a 'you're-cute-and-i-can-show-you-off' way, but in a 'you're-never-leaving-my-side-and-ill-gladly-kill-everyone-so-you-only-have-me' way. he's that initially annoying and flirty stranger who eventually grows on you, so much so that when he one day puts a hand around you and gleefully announces that he was your boyfriend, despite never having talked to you about this arrangement, you can't find it in you to object. he is sort of cute, with that killer smile. even if he is so reckless you worry for him all the time and has these frightening rounds of jealousy, you supposed it could work out.

he doesn't even need you to finish his task, to be honest. stealing documents and the like was child's play for nikolai. he just wanted an excuse to mess with you while getting paid. oh, but you treating him so genuinely, with so much care...he can't just let anyone else receive that sort of treatment in the unlikely situation he had to break up with you. if he had to kill you after this arrangement, it would be quite a waste, wouldn't it? you were so sweet to him. there were always other ways to make you cry—ways he was sure you'd enjoy almost as much as him. if you didn't...well, you'd just have to learn to like it!

imagine his shock when he comes to visit one day to find you...gone! like you had disappeared from your place overnight. even he hadn't been expecting this turn, after all, the two of you had been getting even closer. was it because he kept insisting on trying some potentially dangerous things in bed? but you'd have talked to him about it first. this was...unlike you. and then he catches sight of the news and realizes someone had leaked out some of his personal history.

oops. he forgot most people weren't comfortable dating a murderer.

too bad you didn't have a choice anymore! he finds you, as expected. with his ability and his understanding of you, it was only a matter of time. thing is, nikolai doesn't really like to threaten you so badly, really. sure, there were those times when he swore he would tear apart anyone who tried to ask you out, and promised to kill everyone you ever dated before him so that he could be the only living person to boast of such an honor. and he did pull out a knife on you a couple times but it was all fun and games! really! this time, not so much.

nikolai had you grabbing onto the edge of his coat while he dangled you over the edge of a skyscraper, having used his ability to bring you here earlier. you were probably too scared to be listening to him, but all he was asking of you was an apology and a promise to never leave him like that again. promise him you'd always be by his side.

he was so worried for you! this was the least you could do to make it up to him.

koyou would be devastated when she realizes what this feeling was. the strange warmth that came from sitting next to you, sharing meals and talking about work, quiet moments together—she was stupid for letting it go this far. and now...now she was in too deep.

if only she had stuck to her goal and only been an acquaintance to you. if only you hadn't shown her such a beautiful sight and the possibility of a warm future together. she couldn't bear losing you, couldn't live knowing she could never hold you as close as she yearned to after this was over.

unless...she took some disastrous action.

she knew you would hate her more than you already did if she brought you into her world. you would hate it there, but she was foolishly hoping her presence would make it a little more bearable. you were so wonderful to her...could you manage to love her just a little more? could you overlook your disgust for her tainted soul and hold her like you did, before the truth came out?

[femininetea]

"Always expecting betrayal... But never from you"

The general who became a father to his soldier (spoilers for rwby v8 ch13)

Personal impressions:

I was so mad last week, thinking IW would have been defeated already/too soon but they tricked us. And I'm so glad it's a Winter vs. Ironwood fight. And the emotions.... I can't.

He was her father figure and I'm sure it was viewed like that from both sides. We were clearly shown what IW would do if anyone was in his way. Even when she disobeyed he didn't shoot her. He trusted her until the last moment.... We saw him get mad, break down and hopeless. But never cry. It's not just any soldier he's fighting. He's fighting his right hand. Winter Schnee, someone who was like a daughter to him.

But let's get to their actual relationship.

An essay on Winter in RWBY is planned btw.

Winter seems to have the highest rank in the military next to Ironwood, which is impressive for her age and shows her determination but also how IW believes in her

In V4 Jacques claimed that IW "stole his daughter" and IW hinted at that they often had this conversation

In V7 Jacques asked IW if Winter knew that Weiss returned to Atlas

From the point of V2 and V3 it seems that Winter still had contact to Jacques but not as much anymore in V7, something happened and I think because of the dust embargo IW and Jacques had their confrontation and Winter obviously chose IW's side and detached from her father completely

(It was always hinted (and I think even stated in the remnant guide book) that Winter protected her siblings and had to take the most abuse. And you can clearly see that by her type of fight or flight trauma and how she's literally supposed to represent the ice queen with her hidden emotions and stuff

You see her in that state of shock, fear, panic, trauma etc. when she realizes that she failed Ironwood. He was proud of her for catching Yang, Ren and Jaune and put his hand on her since they would be useful. Harriet then told him and I think this represents how someone like IW would be able to hurt her that much emotionally since he is in the position of an authority and a father figure to her)

Also he was ready to shoot his people at any time like the council man or Marrow but he didn't shoot her and allowed her to stay by her side

That and how she defends IW most of the time show how she trusts her judgment, IW trusts her judgement as well as seen in V4 when he told Jacques that Winter told him that there was a threat in Mistral

In World of Remnant we see IW walking past soldiers and Winter standing out. It was about the technical grooming of atlas students to join the military but you can tell from what we know of Ironwood, that he has a good heart (eruption fang made a vid on that recently)

When Winter told Weiss that "the general would have a place for you" She said it with such happiness, atlas and the military was winter's new home and IW gave her the chance to repurpose her life

She even defended IW in front of Jacques, her biological father and she takes great personal offense when his judgement is mistreated. Even when Weiss talked about trust Winter said that he would never hide anything from her

The offer with the Winter Maiden... You could say that he did this to control her and I'd accept your opinion... But there's one thing that makes me think that he still obviously also cared for her. Over the years he knew how much the military meant to her. She even told Penny that her life doesnt matter and only her job does. It means everything to her and like Winter said herself, she saw the Maiden powers as a privilege and it makes me feel like Ironwood saw them as something that would make her unique and give her once again a purpose that is unique to her and not just her being one of many soldiers

He even apologized, knowing it wouldn't be easy for her (since he expected Winter and not Ozcar) and when he had his talk with RWBY he called Winter her/Weiss' sister instead of just her name and idk but that just made this even more special

In Volume 8 it is once again shown how Winter is basically the one who also trusted Ironwood until the end. And in ch 12 she didnt judge him... She expressed her worries for his behavior. She couldn't believe the man who made her feel like she was everything would ever become so cruel

They way their worry for each other looks so similar

And while I know that they have a theme for the Atlas military , I think it's obvious how Winter looked even more like IW in all her outfits compared to the rest of the military

Many people think Ironwood is dumb for over trusting Winter but I think it shows his flaw as a general. He let's his emotions get in the way since he cares about her and continues to trust her even though she disobeyed orders

His last words were "As my last order: step aside", he could've just shot her again as she layed defenseless on the ground but he didn't

Remember how in the first episode he said "Thank you Winter, I don't know what I would do without you"

Right before, she said that she'll be fine without him asking anything. It sounds a little more personal in my opinion. Why would you tell your boss that you'll be fine without him asking about your status? the conversation was literally about Qrow and Robyn before but he looked worried and wanted the room for themselves and she immediately said that.

Some people also talk about how they emphasized with Ironwood in volume 7 since wasn't shown to have family or a partner yet would do anything for Atlas. But again, he did care about Winter a lot and wanted her to be save.

Something I also noticed when writing this is that in volume 3 Ironwood called her Schnee yet in V7 he calls the Ace Ops and her via first name basis. Clover said that he trusts Ironwood with this life and I think that's how Winter and the Ace ops felt about him, the person who gave them hope. Especially Winter.

And now we're here. Seeing the man cry a tear. We know now, if Winter wins, she has to kill him. Imprisoning him wasn't enough. And I think that will be her final moment of her being a "Ice Queen", when she has to kill him, she will probably turn to her emotional side and grieve.

As mentioned, the military, her position, her rank and Ironwood meant everything to her. She talked so enthusiastically when she had her conversation with Weiss about moving in together without their father and how IW has a place for her younger sister. And now along with Ironwood, both are in a situation they never thought they'd be in.

That was it from me. In short form , I just wanted to share some ideas and things I've noticed about their relationship and dynamic. None of this is meant as a romantic way and you can of course disagree but please stay respectful. Thank you and we'll see each other next chapter<3

P. S. Winter please don't die

[doyouremem8erme]

I would love to see a directors cut of the vivisectanne au, it's my favorite fic series of yours (I am very mentally ill)

WOOO this may get longish im just gonna rant abt all sorts of stuff i did in there. under the cut for length and discussion of. the topics of this au! so cw for mentions of vivisection, torture, self harm, and suicidal thoughts, and passages from the fics that may contain descriptions of those. even if youre tagged you dont have to read through all of this. its heavy.

so first off the first chapter was originally all i wanted to write! i heard darcy's line at the end of tbote and i was like. woah i can do something cool with that. however i just.... kept writing. this means each installment is much more cohesive than my usual multichapters i'd published before, since i try to write them all at once before posting!

so it all started with good old vivisectianne. i wanted a bit of a callback to tc&tk with some of the first scenes:

this place, right here, where it took apart marcy's phone, is where it then takes apart anne! why did i say that so cheerfully–

ok heres an actual funny fact

this exchange originally consisted of something like this:

"...you may call us darcy."

"that's cringe."

"YOURE CRINGE!" (immediately stabs anne)

i didnt even rewrite it until i'd finished the entire fic and was rereading it for editing! it just. no longer fit the overall tone whatsoever.

ok chapter 2 comments:

dont have a lot of comments here. basically, when i decided on the length/format i wanted the fic to be (4 chapters each), i chose to have each of the first three chapters be from a different point of view, with the last being sort of a "finale." so here we switch to sasha pov!

And once she does, the robot can do nothing to prevent her from sending a punch into its eye that leaves it sparking on the ground, and Sasha wipes the blood the shattered glass has left on her fist away on her bottom hem of her tunic, and runs through the door.

^ decided to try my hand at foreshadowing stuff for once lmao, since very soon sasha will lose her eye to darcy. the actual eye loss happens offscreen between chapter 2 and 3 but this clues a careful reader in on what may be to come.

this fic was written shortly after the all in promo, so the fight between darcy and sasha is inspired by the theories revolving around that!

when sasha mentions that "olivia told [her] what it did to [marcy]," this is bc i wanted to make sure that sasha knew the basics of what had actually happened to marcy. since they were imprisoned together for a brief time during the events of the first chapter while anne was having a bad time, olivia did a bit more explanation than whatever the heck her warnings in tbote were.

ohohoho time to talk abt one of my favorite chapters... chapter 3 of icduysg!!!

people who have caught on to the pov switching would likely guess that this chapter was marcy pov. however i wanted to write the opening scene to be ambiguous for anyone else, so that the reveal sort of . comes slowly.

She wakes up on the floor of the basement with a stabbing pain in her heart. Or what’s left of it, after everything. She can’t see, she can’t—she scrabbles at her head, fingers glancing off glossy metal, and throws the object covering her face to the ground with a clank. Her hands are covered in blood. There’s a flame-edged scythe on the floor beside her, and Frog she hates that fiery blade because it’s too familiar to one she knows all too well.

the first lines could be a giveaway, but everything that comes afterward makes it more and more clear whose pov this is supposed to be.

“Please, Marcy! I—I forgive you. For everything.” And yet her words hit her like a sword to the back. And she remembers. Fire and pain and blood and dying and waking up and almost safe and claws on her scalp that tear into skin and cold metal restraints and the helmet’s slow descent and pain and screaming and screaming and screaming and orange and lightning and loneliness and darkness and the Core and—

of course i had to take the cheesy way. why not? "i forgive you for everything" / "thank you for everything" stab ME in the chest when i hear them too! rlly loved using the simile there bc it has greater meaning with marcy yknow. the way the return of memories is written in this fic, as seen also in the next chapter, is inspired by some of  nosferatank's incredible prose!

a close reader will notice that something is wrong with marcy as soon as she can't move her arms to hug sasha: she's losing control again throughout this scene. and then, though it isn't explicitly stated, sasha sees something wrong with marcy's eyes. it's marcy pov, she wouldnt be able to look in her own eyes and know that they're orange. the reason marcy remains lucid throughout it regaining control here is that the helmet is gone: i believe this is discussed in the sequel, i'll go through that when i get to it in here lol.

The invasion goes smoothly, she’s told the next time she wakes up. She doesn’t ask how it went, only knows that the castle is back in Amphibia, and that Darcy has pulled her from the tank at last, and that her world has been thoroughly conquered. It’s been about a month since they tried to rescue Marcy, apparently. A month since it took Anne apart to see how her powers worked, callous to her screams of agony.

we start out the finale chapter with a timeskip and another ambiguous pov. it's anne this time, at least at the beginning of the chapter.

and we get the next example of that style of implementing rushing memories:

Pain and screaming and blood hot on lips and pleading-desperate for this to end and flaming heat and obsidian-sharp agony and—

the basment scene with marcy waiting for anne and sasha to go through with their plan is one of my favorites. had a lot of fun with the usage of light:

Light does return, in the form of a streak of yellow light painted against the black.

andrias extends his sword in the darkness of the basement. marcy, of course, is terrified.

this fic by @skibs-scribbles is an influence throughout the last section of the finale of this fic and the tone of the entire sequel! one of my faves.

last note on this fic:

But on the nights when they get to be together, even for a few hours, they sleep in each other's arms, and let the nightmares and tears and phantom screams run through. And then they stare out at the smog-blotted stars over a world that once seemed so bright, like the kids they were before this world broke them.

this is just one of my favorite lines from the fic, im super proud of it. suits being the last line of the fic.

on to sdlgwyd!

as a marcangst lover, i chose to make this entire fic be from marcy's point of view, as she seemed the most interesting character to follow in the au. her guilt, even more intense here than in canon, seemed like an interesting place to pull from, not to mention that she's my favorite character.

a lot of this fic ends up being an allegory for self-harm, given that not only are there themes of it throughout, but the core's methods of torture very much resemble common forms of self harm.

most of the first chapter is just intended to set up the rest of the fic. this means it's establishing how the core and marcy function, the situation anne and sasha are in, etc.

one thing i think it's funny to point out, given that i wrote this before all in:

Sasha jokes, once, early on, when they still think that this may be a temporary arrangement to buy them enough time for an escape, that they now match: the deep, slicing burn on her own chest; the gnarled line of scar tissue mirrored on Marcy’s front and back[.]

look how close i got to manifesting canon! if sasha had been facing away from darcy during that scene in the last fic i wouldve straight up predicted that wild bit in all in lmao.

She deserves it. The Core agrees. And she’s not sure which of them started that line of thought anymore.

this line was surprisingly hard to word right, but i liked what i ended up with. this becomes important throughout the fic: does marcy actually think she deserves this pain, is the core only telling her that, or is it true?

when marcy goes to visit olivia and yunan in the dungeons, we get this line:

She stops in front of where it should be. The cell is drowned in thick shadows, draped over the stone like swaths of gauzy black cloth. 

the "swaths of gauzy black cloth" simile is very much intended to give a sort of funeral, mourning, etc. vibe. it seemed fitting, giving how they've likely been crying over marcy all this time.

She pauses for a glance down at the carbon-fiber bracers she knows are in place around her forearms, covering from palm to elbow in dark, dull-metallic, charcoal-gray, covering the scars that lie there. They can assume it’s only using the chair, the very place where they saw such horrible things happen to her, once again, for all she cares. They don’t need to know what happens when it picks up a glinting blade, the same one it’s used to make the changes it deems necessary for her body so long as it’s shared with a computed mind. 

this is one of the most prominent examples of the overarching allegorical theme of this fic. marcy hides the damage the core has done to her using her own hands. for whatever reason, she doesnt want them to know how it's actually been hurting her.

I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Is that all she can say anymore? Only those words that dribbled from her lips along with a shower of blood the night she was so violently killed, left to bleed to death with a smoking wound? Will she ever find another way to justify the fact that she’s still alive, ask for forgiveness for her existence, the pain she’s caused?

wanna point out this passage not just bc im absolutely obsessed with how i wrote it but bc. marcy girl. you need help. her mental state is in shambles bc of the suffering the core has caused.

when marcy gets back to the trio's chambers, she overhears anne and sasha discussing plans to escape. the core is not happy about this.

not only is this a pretty deep look into marcy's thoughts, theres another reference to a separate fic! during the "escape lies..." passage, there's this section:

Escape awaits off the edge of the protruding form of that ancient weapon from the top of the highest level of this castle, jutting into the void, high enough, even with the castle resting on the ground. High enough, though she won’t test it, she tells herself (the Core wouldn’t let her die anyway, she knows. It would stop her, or catch her, or do whatever it takes to repair her, bring her to life again, no matter how broken she becomes).

this is a bit of a shoutout to a plot point in beauty and the beasts by @your-local-hurt-comfort-junkie-1, another fic i adore. i wont spoil the exact thing, but if youve read that fic, you likely know what i mean.

another shoutout in this scene is "'We can’t leave.' Her words are not entirely her own." this is of course a reference to awakening by oh geeez: "lately my head's on fire and my voice is not my own..."

the next chapter contains yet another fic shoutout:

this passage is a reference to this evil thing that @maldito-arbol did in the wjh series lmao.

and then of course, inevitably:

And that subconscious wish has been granted. It’s her skin filled with gashes once again, worse than it’s ever drawn them before, her own blood splattering her face as the Core digs deeper and deeper.

...she gets that wish granted.

Not even Olivia and Yunan can help anymore, their words falling upon dulled ears and their touch upon numb skin, like she’ll never perceive the world as brightly as she once did ever again.

core bestie. you need to stop. your host is gonna break if you kepe this up.

the finale chapter of this fic is fun!

we start out with a confusing dive into a scene without context, set up to match marcy's confusion here. eventually, you can figure out what happened: marcy was knocked out by sasha and anne so that they could deal with the core.

after they succeed in their plan, they head off to kill andrias.

“I wanna kill him.” Her voice has a coldness Anne’s never heard from her. And it trembles, because she knows there was a time Andrias truly cared for her. But he’s gone too long letting the Core torment her, pretending he’s blind to the torture.

guess how much i listened to hayloft ii while writing this chapter lol. yeah it was a lot. the emphasis on "her" is of course to clarify that the core has used her voice to speak like this to anne: that's what it did back in the first chapter of icduysg.

By now, Marcy has recovered from the removal of the Core’s data enough to stand, albeit shakily, and most likely soon won’t be able to at all, after the exoskeleton finally gives out when the background functions programmed into her brain stop running.

marcy doesnt have time to confront this right now, but itll come up in the third installment! without the core powering her exoskeleton, she won't be able to walk on her own before long.

a couple scenes in this chapter are inspired by pieces of art i couldnt stop thinking about. here's the first one:

It feels heavy in her hands. She’s never held this before, only a smaller version, crafted for the Core to use in her own grasp. This is the weapon that killed her. This is the weapon that will kill her murderer. 

and the art:

the dialogue in this scene is somewhat inspired by anne's speech in all in: this was written after the finale episodes aired. meanwhile, i tried to emphasize marcy's frazzled mental state through her own dialogue. for example:

she's just not doing so well rn. havent watched arcane since last year but the vibes of this might have jinx killing silco energy??

and then andrias's actual death scene is very likely an obvious reference:

yep, direct shout-out to true colors. marcy's "you brought this upon yourself" is meant to parallel "now look what you've made me do," while "i'm truly sorry for what i did to you" lines up with "i'm sorry for everything."

anne and sasha assisting in holding the sword while marcy stabs andrias is inspired by the other art i mentioned:

and finally the fic ends on a hopeful note that's been missing since the very beginning. i really wanted this to have the same sort of distinctly soft and gentle ending seen often at the end of some epic story, when things return to a status quo. similar tone to the end of adventure time, before the island song montage, or something. a sense of saying goodbye. there's an important detail mentioned in the last section of this fic, but i wont point it out bc it spoils some of the vaugely planned plot points for the next fic in the series!

hope you enjoyed this very deep dive in to the au, this took so long to write lmao.

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket Manga Review , ch 107- 108

se03, ep 6 is weakest ep in se03 despite it being tohru’s long waited focus & having the biggest plot keys & character impactful moments & one of the best pining hug scenes in anime history “ thro the laundry sheets at sunset”. Reading the chapter that starts this ep in the manga made me feel so happy & so angry.. I lament all the subtle yet effective changes & the powerful character-influenced changes that the anime ditched for cheap drama or unexplained wide shot.

-The Art of Subtlety: Power Resides in Words:

In se03, ep 6 when tohru tells kyo that Isuzu will be staying at Kazuma’s, kyo responds that” then Master won’t feel lonely”. Meaning after his imprisonment. Huge gut wrenching moment since kyo doesnt know that tohru knows abt his imprisonment.

The anime chooses to displayed it in their mandatory style of “ kyoru-moment inside shigure house : which is widen the shot so much to include yuki & shigure & flatten the emotional impact to include other characters reaction that has nothing to do with the moment itself... They never consider zooming into the kyo-tohru reactions to their words, then widen the moment o include yuki, shigure, the tv, the woods, kyoko’s grave or the moon if they want to.. Complete lack of understanding of the emotional impact. This isn’t abt romantic lovey dovey moment. This is abt character development. The biggest loser i this design is : Tohru’s emotions. God, I hate how bland she is in the anime in regards to situations that affect HER.

Also, the anime chooses to squeeze in another moment here, which is kyo’s reaction to tohru’s grave visit & still lacks in showing the emotional depth even here & opted for what? yup! you guessed it. Widen the shot to include yuki & shigure. At this point I wonder why kyo & tohru didnt adopt yuki & shigure & took them with them in their house by the end of the story. To complete the tradition of these two poor guys witnessing everything..-_-’. Jokes aside, This doesn't just affect kyo-tohru. But also reflects badly at shigure & yuki. They become an unwanted third-wheels without proper plot or character driven reason. In good story-telling “ forced-third wheeling has a purpose!!”, such as to transfusion to the 3rd character moment or to be later used for the 3rd character driving emotional moment. not just a reminder that characters X & Y live here & therefore see this & that.. This is an example of missing the impactful design of the moment. I dont even understand how can someone miss such basic story-telling devices... 

Lets look at only 3 panels from the manga:

See how in the above panels in the focus is on tohru’s emotions. This is Tohru’s focus why not show her emotions instead of her stupid wide eyed, new eye lashes face & zooming out on tohru to include yuki for no reason!!!!! The anime is capable of focusing on characters pain, we saw that wioth yuki dozens of times. The anime is capable of focusing on showing facial emotions, we saw this with kyo in all his focused eps! Why can’t they give tohru half of that.. Just look, she looks like spacing out thinking of what to cook~ lala~ gotta feed the boys.!! zoom out on her & her purpose on the story~~~~~

-The power of words is unbelievable~~

Kyo’s little sentence of being happy Isuzu will stay with kazuma, destroyed tohru. Look how the manga makes tohru continues to think abt it. You might wonder why will the author do this? The author is building towards tohru realizing her romantic love & uncovering her traumatic attachment to her mom. Reminds you of sth? the 6 or 7 eps that se02 dedicated to yuki where every sentence established his journey towards facing his emotions. In se02, yuki thought abt the words of many characters until he reached his conclusion. The anime refused to give tohru ONE sentence.

-Powerful Character-Influenced Moments:

The manga made rohru leave screaming abt wanting the curse to break before spring. Why? because (a) tohru must be giving time to think abt HERSELF, not the cat or the curse, so tohru wander around thinking abt her mom, we saw that in the anime.  the the moment of shigure tells tohru abt the zodiacs ugly spirit & delight at seeing the cat suffers happens right before kyo finds crying tohru. Why? because (a) it was established that kyo will visit kazuma, so no weird out of no where lover finds lover in the streets for loving support moment, (b) to make kyo’s emotional support to tohru reasonable. In the anime, he saw her crying & comforted her assuming she cried cuz of the grave visit or sth, it was never hinted at anything, cuz kyo never gets any inner thoughts until it is his dramatic moments, but here he comforts her cuz he thinks she’s upset abt Isuzu, why oh why you write this thing out??????????????????????????????????

Not enough eps? but you gave motoko half an ep?!!! Why write off your main protagonist? I dont get it??? why intentional make tohru one-denominational character. Either yuki’s momma or a girl in love.... Is that what women are for the anime? a caring loving mothers & good lovers?

-Shigure’s words are to tohru are so watered down in the anime. Here he connects everything to the major plot of “ zodiacs turing into cute animals ” premise of the story, this is not sth cute as the early story made it out yo be. I love this!!!! why the anime cut it! Tohru screams when shigure brings an unavoidable question. Ask yuki & the the others whom tohru loves & believes they’re the kindest. Ask them of they KNOW kyo will be locked & are relieved! so cruel & shocking thing to thin abnt that shatters tohru’s world! shigure knows tohri will NEVER ask! so true to his character! epic moment! My best shigure-tohri moment! both of them NOT hiding anything & both in theit lowest moment!!  INGENUOUS WRITING!!! so plot-worthy!!! WHY CUT IT!!!

Kyo finds tohru cuz he saw her sad! bringing the realistic aspect of story-telling & ditching the dunb superficial coincidence.

Look at how tohru uncovers her trauma little by little:

parallel between loosing her mom & loosing kyo. By showing this, the readers/ viwer will begin to be prepared to question tohru’s “ I cant love mom more than kyo”. The following chapters will for sure dive into this deeper, writing tohru as more understandably, more flawed., more real. Nothing like a the fixer for grown men, nothing like an angelic mom, nothing like the princess saved by the prince’s love. Basically, nothing like her shallow anime self.

Side Notes:

I was right abt the anime wanting to close Isuzu & Haru’s arc in ep 5, cuz in this chapter we have a lil scene that is the follow up with their plotline. Haru wanting to thank Kureno & asing Isuzu to never risk herself. It’s the little things that add depth to characters.. but I get it Haru in se03 can no longer support yuki cuz yuki have Kakeru, so his plotline is reduced to isuzu’s lover & that was closed in ep 5. Isuzu still had few things to add to the plot in ep 6 which is be tohru’s unfiltered deep talk partner. 

The sad reality of the anime focusing on wide shots lost us yet another good emotional impact besides kyo-tohru moments. This time, we lost kazuma’s reaction to isuzu being held in cat’s room & haru/yuki’s reaction to kazuma’s sadness.. The anime gives us wide shot to include all the room. so,Screw haru & yuki’s reaction???.. they dont care abt the cat? is that it? nope, cuz this reasoning requires emotional depth of hate & disgust. The anime just loves wide shots “ so artistic~” but the real reason, the anime is flying in bullet speed in this ep to include as much as it can to save place for the “ new added moment of kyoru’s united shock” & still include the intro & outro... yep, ep6 is the weakest ep in design...

More on ep 6 in the following chapters, I guess. I’ll stop here this time. I’m so mad.. I’ll calm down & read the flowing two chapters later to articylate proper thoughts.

 I hate hate how tohru was done so dirty! I’m loving everything abt her so far in the manga, but when I remember her in the anime! ugh! I still love kyo & yuki’s anime stories. But tohru, nope. I stopped loving her in se02 once the beach arc is over & she became a full mother to yuki & nothing more. I adore her character & she’s so endearing, but My God, she’s so bland in the anime, just the lightest version of her manga self... so light, it’s a shame she’s a protagonist...

I really wonder how manga readers feel abt the lack of tohru’s focus & lost emotional depth? is tohru even popular in the manga days? I know kyo is popular & i know lots adore yuli’s growth. but what abt tohru? I’m curious how manga readers felt watching her butchered arc in se03?

[megashadowdragon]

shanks is the child of rocks d xebec and a celestial dragon

www  . opfanpage . com/2019/09/30/shanks-is-the-son-of-rocks-d-xebec/

¨Shanks is 39, he would have been an infant during the God Valley Incident.

We know that Garp does not like to talk about the God Valley Incident. What if part of the reason was that he discovered Shanks there? He killed Rocks alongside Roger, and the two of them then find infant Shanks on Xebec’s ship.

Knowing that the World Government would not accept a child of Rocks D. Xebec into the world, Garp knew that only choice was to either leave him to die or let Roger take him with his crew. This is how Shanks came onto Roger’s ship to be an apprentice.

Another important piece: This would further solidify why Roger entrusted Ace to Garp. Because of the God Valley Incident and Shanks, Roger knew that Garp would not allow a child of a pirate to be imprisoned/killed by the World Government.

According to Sengoku, the Rocks Pirates members were very violent and would kill friends and foes alike, and their lack of camaraderie caused crewmembers to kill each other constantly even while at sea.

Here Whitebeard mentions about someone who injured him in the past.

While it could be Roger, Shanks and Roger look nothing alike and Whitebeard was too close to Roger to mention him as ‘that guy’.

To bring together such a rowdy bunch, Rocks D. Xebec had to rule with an iron fist. He might have gathered his crew in the first place based on his might alone. Submit willingly, or get broken and then join. Something later emulated by his apprentice Kaido.

I think Rocks D. Xebec was the guy Whitebeard was talking about. That means Shanks is his son. Which is why Shanks is wary of Blackbeard, who wants to fulfill his idol Rocks D. Xebec’s dream.¨

plus the only time we hear someone bring up their scar aching in regards to someone its someone they hate like with shanks scar from BB or luffys scar from akainu.

also blackbeard is the evil counterpart to luffy luffy inherited rogers will and developed a brotherly relationship with rogers son. it fits for bb the inheritor of rocks d. xebecs will to have an antagonistic relationship with rocks. d. xebecs son  rogers son and xebecs son were both brought on the crews of people who fought their dads ( though roger and whitebeard had an amicable relationship  while xebec and roger didnt ) and saw them as their father figures ( it was outright stated that roger had held a baby before momo when it was commented that holding momo took him back)

www . reddit . com/r/OnePiece/comments/673qru/aching_scars_narative_significance/

this would mean that all 4 yonkos at the start of the series had a connection to xebec 3 ( kaido , big mom , whitebeard) were on his crew  1 was his child

also blackbeard is set up as luffys evil counterpart/rival they were compared when they first met.

luffy inherited rogers will despite not being bloodrelated its fitting if blackbeard inherited xebecs will despite not being related to him by blood

and luffy developed a close relationship with ace the true son of roger  who hated his father and was on the ship of his fathers rival whitebeard who he  had seen as a father

so blackbeard being enemies with shanks the biological son of xebec whose will bb inherited and  was on the ship of xebecs enemy roger and likely seen roger as a father  is completely fitting

shanks alludes to tyr the norse god of justice  ( heck shanks getting his hand bitten off is similar to how tyr got his hand bitten off )which is why I along with other reasons think shanks will be at elbaf

(and tyr ended up being killed by garm a hellhound who is said to be the guardian of the underworld the norse equivalent to cerberus the hellhound with three heads   and blackbeards pirate flag has 3 heads

it is often said that the D is the enemy of god so it fits that shanks the good celestial dragon confronts the evil member of the D clan ( a flip on how it usually goes )

I mean blackbeard is the evil counterpart to luffy and luffys final opponents will be the world government/ celestial draons who call themselves gods so it would fit for blackbeard to face a good celestial dragon

that would be shanks

)

if there were children there at god valley it would add to why roger and garp stepped in for children were in  danger

: This would further solidify why Roger entrusted Ace to Garp. because while garp hates  CD he didnt want the children to die

it was outright stated that roger had held a baby before momo when it was commented  by rayleigh that holding momo reminded him of the good old days so imagine if xebec succeeded in killing a few celestial dragons including shanks parents which led roger to take shanks  who would be 1 years old  

( what if gods valley was in west blue )

[symphorine]

end of game thoughts! basically all if act 3 i think. i put it in a notes app as i was playing so this is my thoughts as i went :') bed time now good night all

point of no return... end of game here i come

oh yes. i suppose we didnt account for them MAKING an eclipse. altho with elgarnan being lord of the day and night maybe we should have rip.

weird long pause when making the little speech... also god. some rly cheesy lines. it was cute a few times but its just kinda grating now. also "we might not all make it back" haha. lol. lmao even.

im making the rounds before checking on my li and actually not everyone rly has smth to say thats like... relevant to the situation??? why not??? Harding gave me a line that was clearly from around the treviso/minrathous decision! neve talked to me about bellara's serials 😭 what

lucanis "they moved the /moon/" idk what to tell u babe. ur right. we are fucked. onwards!

"if i have to kill every blighted creature in thedas to keep you safe, i will." no zevran but i like it anyway. also frustrated that rooks tone is always very similar no matter what mood u choose. the inq had little personality but rook Has One Personality which... i dont think is better. and even then ive had moments of They Would Not Fucking Say That. sigh.

also like... its sweet. but weve had so little romance content before that its... a little out of nowhere? just like. idk. i guess it never feels like enough. ill table this for now. later edit: yeah the i love you moment of later on doesnt feel super earned. i feel like some romance specific lines/banter, maybe a scene or two, would have helped flesh it out more.

oh we're gonna talk to varric? FAscinating 🙃🙂🙃🙂🙃🙂🙃🙂 oh my god this is excruciating give me the reveal now i cant go through more varric stock phrases.

man are u telling me we really never get to suspect anything????? this sucks. i know somethings wrong!!! before i got spoiled halfway through i was already suspicious!!! why can't rook be also!!!!

i know whoever i choose is gonna die and im :((((((((

ok very funny that its the endgame but we can still get loot. bro what am i gonna do with a flawless crystal now, chuck it at the archdemon? (dont get me wrong im collecting all that)

neve asked what the antaam was chanting and my rook answered... how would they even know. theyre an elf and a warden

got a codex entry that says "andruil is gone. lost." and during their confrontation solas and elgarnan also said the other evanuris were dead... but solas imprisoned all of them right? so what happened? did solas kill them during that ritual? or manage to transfer them first? did they get consumed by the blight in their prison? were they already dead and he imprisoned their corpses?

SOLAS YOU MOTHERFUCKER

mortals cannot win this LET US TRY. HELP US. WHAT IS THIS. IM GOING TO TEAR YOU APART WITH TWEEZERS AND BANISH EVERY FRAGMENT OF YOU ACROSS THE FADE AND THE MORTAL WORLD.

ok i will say having allllmost romanced bellara and hcing rook and her are very close, seeing all those regret statues of her is hitting a little bit.

OH SHE TALKED... BELLARA ;n;

ooooh... "you taught me it was okay to be angry. that sometimes you /have/ to be. but that it shouldn't destroy you." actually so very fitting here when daea is feeling absolute rage and despair. they should be angry but they cant let it destroy and control them. they have to be a person and not an emotion. aughoughoughhhh

SHOT OF THE DOOR LEADING TO VARRICS ROOM... DAEA'S BEEN FEELING LIKE SOMETHING WRONG BUT UNABLE TO PUT THEIR FINGER ON IT... THEYVE DREAMED ABOUT THE DOOR BUT DIDNT REALIZE WHAT IT WAS... OOOOOOH

THE WHOLE TIME. THE WHOLE TIME!!! AND HE TOLD ME TO SAY SORRY TO VARRIC!!!!! AND NO ONE TALKED ABOUT HIM. SOLAS IM COMING FOR YOU.

pretty sure he didnt mean to OKAY AND THE REST??? THAT WASNT AN ACCIDENT.

wait so. was it solas impersonating varric or was it rook just... making him up in the fade???? what??? also wow why did no one ever try to talk to me about varric at all.

"only the venatori survived" sooo did they kill dorian?

man. and after all that the devs still hope i might feel sorry for solas? lol.

mannnn we were in there for days????

awww the little romance scene with lucanis was very sweet. his romance overall is very like. some sweetness amidst the desolation kind of feeling. i like it.

honestly daea has always gotten along ok with spite but right now? best buds.

i liked the little cinematics... we fightin. also i ended up with lucanis and davrin as a team which is a nice echo of weisshaupt - they fought about it, both feeling guilty, both wanting second chances. we're here now.

the venatori said "this is for zara!" and lucanis replied "she's dead. get over it!" beautiful

WE'RE GOING TO TALK TO SOLAS ALONE?? ON AN ELEVATED PLATFORM??? WHILE HE'S DOING MAGIC???? HE BETTER NOT STAB ME

"you are as surprising as ever. even i could not escape that prison. for you to manage it..." you absolute narrow minded imbecile. im going to stab YOU.

ok i cant liveblog the test of this conversation but im not happy. solas im going to bury you in manure. also confirmation solas did the varric thing. little fucker. oooh hes feeling bad now YEAH I DONT CARE AND NEITHER DOES DAEA

"by love for friends ive failed and hurt" maybe. if you stopped killing your friends. youd have more of them. and less hurt. ever thought about that.

BELLARAAAAA

ok fine the wolf transformation was cool. whatever.

aw dorians alive. also the inquisitor showing up with no armor... listen. was it really that hard to ask us for their class so u could give them some armor for this. like truly.

bellara... my blighted darling...

ok we get a little bit of factions helping each other at the end in a codex entry. why couldnt we get more? :( also i wish ambient dialogue that you accidentally cut off triggered again, like for companion banter

oh solas lied again. shocking. when did all the other gods die tho??? did i miss something????

when i ask if drawing solas' blood is the only solution i didnt mean that i didnt wanna do blood magic just that i wondered if there was an easier way... man the way the game treats blood magic... unsurprising but frustrating.

jdhdksks bc of the stupid high crits i get combat against small fry rly backs up the "i dont have time for this" feeling for daea. warrior fighting has been soooo fun and satisfying... i started dao for the very first time with a sword and shield warrior too and it was <3 atrocious <3 but im glad i picked this for davg

kinda wanna do another warden run with either bel or neve romance and being blighted wt the end... blight girlfriends <3 yay <3

so funny to me that when u can open a door the handle is highlighted. but rook has never learned to use a doorknob. not a single time through this while game.

couldnt they have made wolf solas... nicer... hairier- hold on is this because hes bald.

oooh bellara 😭😭😭 putting herself back into the blight 😭😭😭😭

"you... are mortal, elgarnan. enjoy it while it lasts!" YEAH OK COOL TOO

i like that even though i (and daea) am angry at solas for the, yknow, everything, its still satisfying to see him get his justice/revenge on elgarnan. it feels right.

U CAN SWITCH ARMOR BEFORE FIGHTING HIM AGAIN FLSGSLDHDLS ive been switching between 2 armors bc 1 is a good all rounder but another gives me v good protection against fire. so since elgarnan is clearly gonna be using fire now i went to see if i could switch to the fireproof one. and i can. amazing. also he was vulnerable to necrotic damage first and is vulnerable to ice now... i brought lucanis and neve... good pairing :>

man... i got all options. i think... daea is so angry at solas. for their friends, for all his victims, for themselves as a dalish elf and a warden. but theyre tired of fighting. and if they can ask him to stop before having to kill another god today... and thinking abt harding's words in the fade prison... hmmm... interesting in the sense that theyve been angry, lighthearted and nice but with a lot of that anger and desire for justice underneath, but now at the end theyre choosing to get past it. theyre tired of it. mmmm

ballaraaaaaaAAA UNBLIGHTED????? CAN WE CURE THE GODDAMN BLIGHT NOW????? BIOWARE

archon dorian... jdhsks hes the last magister left basically. he gets the seat by default. also every time we talk abt the griffons i have... questions abt how theyre gonna breed them out of extinction. idk maybe genetics work differently for griffons. better hope thats how it works cause otherwise uuuh extinction is just delayed

anyway i am a little baffled by that one chest i found after being able to interact with the last merchant but otherwise act 3 was v well done i think. not rly much more to say, it satisfied me, i liked that i got to actually fight (verbally) with solas lol and i do think the "good" ending of convincing him to bind the veil to himself was actually rewarding for me as a player, even when i spent the game exasperated at him. good voice acting but also good body language there!!! which was a pleasant surprise since body animations are a little lacking imo for the rest of the game. bellara worked rly well for the role of the blighted companion so im glad i picked her! curious if neve has different dialogue, bc if not then bellara is def best. a little sad that hardings gone but also baffled at like. the wasted potential for a further storyline??? this isnt dao they knew to plan for a possible future game, but harding can be permanently dead, so...? altho. i guess we didnt actually get the body after. no body no death? dead but not entirely, part of the stone now? hmmmm

ill replay it for sure, the ending/act 3 actually sold me more on the game. i stilllll think as a dragon age continuation its... err. not what i wanted. not what id have liked. all the retcon and smoothing over of potential... meanness or people/faction being bad stings and spells a future direction im just not that interested in for the dragon age universe. but as a game? yeah i enjoyed it, i liked the gameplay, the npcs, found the romance a little lacking but rly liked the amount of inter companion interaction and reactivity, i thought all companion quests had a good emotional end, the game itself is very pretty, im annoyed at the sort of One General Personality With Small Variations that rook seems to have (mostly bc itll be hard to like... feel like playthroughs are very different/rooks are different ppl), but tbh im about as annoyed with it as i was with the inquisitor, just differently. think they should def have done smth different for the inquisitor in davg bc that showed theyd learned nothing of the reaction to hawke in dai, but i expected it lol. i liked the music eventually! the main theme even grew on me. i have more particular gripes with lore/character treatment but ill let that simmer for a bit. im gonna go to bed nowwww

ps not suuuper happy about the solas toesucking tone that keeps popping up tho. it was hard to say i was angry at him for most of the game! to express it! and ur clearly presented with, at least, a lot of reasons to feel bad for him. and when u talk to the inquisitor... hmmm. yeah. altho i suppose ill try with my (never-finished-the-playthrough) solasmancing inquisitor next run and see what thats like

can't sleep so gonna jot down some thoughts abt davg under a readmore. itll have spoilers!

[detective-gum-chew]

okay okay okay

i know this isnt an orginal idea by any means but roleswap!narumitsu is just so good

so youll have to indulge me because this lives in my head rent free and i want to write it down concretely somewhere (also this gets LONG so ill pop a cut in here)

alright so:

1. at least in my writing of it, this is also a no-dl6/gregory lives au. but as well at that, miles and phoenix didnt go to school together

2. this means that there was nobody to defend phoenix at the class trial (yes i know the money stolen was edgeworths but shhh lets pretend it was someone elses, kay?) this lead to phoenix becoming not only bitter, but somewhat obsessive over the idea of punishing people that do wrong

(if someone can find that quote where phoenix talks about how he could have become a prosecutor because of the trial i will give u a gentle kiss on the forehead) 

3. Edgeworth was raised by Gregory and ends up becoming a defense attorney

4. in this, Von Karma goes down and Franzy is adopted by Gregory, and she assists Miles in his cases. (she can still have a whip, as a treat.)

5. anyway with that set up, lets get into some cases

6. Larry gets accused of Cindys murder, Miles defends with Franzy

7. Lets say Mia was in the crowd of that trial and decided to contact miles, seeing as he appears to be another uncorrupt lawyer and asks him for his help in taking down Redd White

8. He agrees, and she sets a time for him to meet at her office so they can talk. Mia then calls her sister and updates her on how shes going to recruit another person (Redd White hears this)

9. Much like the original case, Mia gets murdered, but this time, Maya isnt here to be blamed. Instead, its Miles himself, as the name that White heard over the phone (so basically we’re speed running to the “defend yourself in court” part)

10. the prosecutor today is Phoenix Wright.

11. but before that lets go into some backstory actually. Phoenix had encountered Mia previously during the Terry Fawles case. He had respected her as a peer, if not for just her determination and deductive skills. (After all, he was young at the time and solely focused on punishing the wicked) After Diego’s poisoning, he had briefly reached out for condolences

12. but anyway, Phoenix had distantly respected Mia, and now that she was dead, he was going to be tough on whoever he thought murdered her.

13. Miles proves his innocence, although it takes some baiting to get Redd White out of his building and actually into court. 

14. Wright is... not pleased about this, but theres not much he can do. His displeasure for Mias murder has shifted, but theres a new displeasure for Miles, the man who could beat him in court. (”well well well, you managed to save your own skin. But you should hope you get as lucky as you did in your next case”)

15. Next case! We know Miles is a steel samurai fan, so even without Maya it takes very little convincing for him to take the case. (Fran is not as amused but trusts her brother... enough.. to follow his lead)

16. Case proceeds mostly as normal, with Phoenix requiring Dee to re-do her testimony (maybe something deep within him still itches to put the true bad guy away, even if its harder than the accused)

17. I dont think Phonix would deliver the unnecessary feelings line, although there definetely is that moment in the lobby where hes like “hm. maybe you arent a bad person, but that doesnt mean i have to like you.”

18. and now, now now now, we finally get to the part where i somehow managed to put the most thought into. (for context it is nearly 2 am when i am writing this)

19. sleep schedule aside, you couldnt have thought i would made this WITHOUT some good angst, so here we go. case four is similarly structured to the original, but with an extra side of Phoenix angst.

20. Miles wakes up to Franzy shaking him. She points to the television. the news is on, but the voices are drowned out by a distant ringing as he stares at the image on the screen.

Famed Prosecutor Phoenix Wright Arrested For Murder

21. it just doesnt make sense. So he gets out of bed and into the closest clothes he can find and out the door with his sister in tow. He sits in the cold detention room, thinking about the other side of the glass.

22. Phoenix Wright looks dull. He asks what they want. Miles says he wants an explanation. Wright sneers and asks why. For some reason, that pisses Miles off. He slams his badge to the glass and Wright looks surprised.

“Do you know what this is? It’s my attorneys badge.”

“the badge doesnt mean youre a good lawyer.”

“Well Mr Wright, its 2-0, so i dont think you have any right to say that.” Miles glares at him and Wright sits back in his seat. He watches Miles for a long time.

“If im going to defend you, you need to tell me what happened.“ Wrights eyebrows shoot up and Franziska squawks at his side

“What do you mean defend him!”

“What she said.”

Miles narrows his eyes at Wright as he ponders to himself the answer. Why is he doing it? the answer comes to him. 

“Because i dont believe you did it.”

For all his snark, Miles cant bring himself to believe that the man in front of him would kill someone. Theres something about him, either in his eyes or the way he carries himself that makes the idea itself preposterous. Wright looks at him for a long time after he says it.

“Very well.”

21. Miles doesnt seem him until court, but at least he testifies. The next person up, a red head by the name of Melissa Foster, gives a testimony that seems airtight.

22. that is, until he looks over at Phoenix, who is pale as he looks at the woman on the witness stand. Phoenix catches his eye, and very carefully, very slowly, mouths one name.

Dahlia Hawthorne

23. (I really wish i could continue with the more narrative parts of this but im honestly running out of steam and ill get to the point lol. Maybe ill finish it later.)

24. Terry Fawles dies on the stand. Diego Armando falls into a coma. Dahlia Hawthorne walks free. Even after what happened to Diego, Phoenix is convinced he can do better. He sets up a meeting with Dahlia.

25. Doug shows up, trying to persuade him away from it, saying he overheard Dahlia’s plan to kill Phoenix when she arrives. Phoenix is cocky, and the pair fight. Doug gets shoved into the powerline. Phoenix, thinking him dead, panics and runs.

26. Dahlia, having overheard, goes back and finishes him off, drops some poison into his mouth perhaps. With an accidental death with a cause so obvious, nobody bothers to run blood tests (until Miles)

27. Its years later, and Phoenix gets a note that tells him they know what really happened to Doug. Phoenix arrives to a meeting place to find a dead body. He picks up the vial of poison almost absently. 

28. After all, Dahlia had gotten rid of Diego and Mia was dead. Now all she had to do was get rid of Phoenix

29. It plays out similarly to case four, with Phoenix being absolved of the first murder, then confessing to the old one. Miles has gone through the work to save his life once, that he cant not do it again.

30. but happy endings (ish) for all, with Phoenix being freed, Dahlia imprisoned and Miles having a better understanding of both him and Phoenix.

31. maybe more happens but we’re at bullet point 31 so its time to stop for now lmao. uh but yeah! roleswap au..... brainrot really.

[swampgallows]

i have been in this bed for ten years. i went to burning man and spent 3 days barely leaving my cot, wandering the desert in a daze and feeling utterly alienated from everyone around me. i got a job and for almost 3 years i would wake up, go to my job, and come home, with almost nothing to break up that schedule. no movies, no outings, no restaurants, not even the grocery store. once a year i would spend a week on the other side of the country in the company of a man who didnt even love me, then i would go back to work. i stopped eating and i stopped sleeping and eventually quit.

i went to the netherlands almost without a hitch, until i realized i would have to come back here, to my bed, to be imprisoned again. i struggled for 2 years to get any kind of mental health help or therapy. in 2019 i went to the emergency room twice, then had a full nervous breakdown that disabled me for months. i tried very hard to get to a point where i was able to drive myself to therapy sessions and finally got assigned a proper therapist, only for the entire world to shut down a week later.

now it has been two more years in my bed with a single week outside of it, which also almost went off without a hitch, until i realized how weak of a link i am in the human chain.

i am not trying to be a victim because i know i have no one to blame but myself. but i do not know how others can go through the world knowing it cares so little for you. i dont know how to keep having hope when i can barely keep my nose above water on the best of days. im not strong enough for existence. if i am the weak link, i should break away.