#i can't fucking deal with this
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i am once again calling for more coffee shops and libraries to be open past 5pm
#i have an essay to work on my laptop is literally in my bag but bc my fuckass bus decided to come 10 mins early#(meaning i missed it bc ?? why not just arrive around the time on the REAL TIME APP!!!(#so now instead of working on my essay ive got to sit in the fucking rain manifesting that my laptop doesn't die somehow#instead of sitting in a library or coffee shop or anything other than a pub or supermarket#i can't fucking deal with this
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When Schrodinger was talking about the cat in box that's both alive and dead, he was talking about Kalina. She's a goddess's familiar, she's a plague, she worked for Fantasy MI6, she died, she came back, she got rage stared, she snapped her own neck, she came back as the companion for a god borne from a Fantasy Mormon child's misplaced belief. She's alive and dead, good and evil. She worked tirelessly for 800 years towards one goal and then fucking abandoned it (maybe.) Her goddess thinks she can fix her. Her goddess's wife always hated her. She is everyone's problem at all times and holy shit is she a Problem. What a fucking legend.
#what a pussy#i can't not damnnit#i will make pussy kalina jokes until the day i fucking die#anyway what the fuck#like... seriously though#what is her fucking deal#like i say i want to know but i don't actually want to know#if you know what's going on in the box it's not Schrodinger's cat anymore#d20#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#fantasy high junior year#kalina
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the annoying thing about being so demisexual ur borderline aro/ace, is when ur uterus decides ur not allowed to sleep during certain points in ur ovulation cycle bc it cranked the hornyness up to 11 at 3 IN THE FUCKING MORNING!!!!!
#i can't fucking deal with this#make it stop#i just wanna sleep#unwanted bodily functions#yes my egg is abt to drop#why does this have to be my problem?#it's not like i want to do anything with it
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Bruce and Clark start dating and Clark finds himself spending more time around the batkids and whenever he's losing an argument he just says "yeah? well I fucked your dad."
It's very effective.
#it deals instant psychic damage#the kids still have not found a good response#clark tries not to be a petty person but he does enjoy the intense reactions his words evoke#it's especially effective on damian who can't even argue that bruce isn't technically his dad#tim tried 'well i fucked your son' once but it just doesn't have the same impact#batman#bruce wayne#superman#clark kent#superbat#dc#dc comics#mine#batfam
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since u hv EDS, i was wondering how do you feel about the portrayal of it in fourth wing? i dont hv EDS myself but ive seen people say that the fact that violet literally falls from her dragon mid air and then is cuaght would dislocate the hell out of her hips and that doesnt happen. which is weird considering that yarros has EDS herself. like youd think she'd know better right? idk what do u think as a writer also with EDS?
I think Yarros is entitled to write whatever escapist fantasy she likes about how she experiences her own disability, but unfortunately, the book gives me the ick on multiple levels.
It's very... disability rep circa the early 2000s...
The disability only affects her when it can be used for angst or to make a point of how small and fragile she is next to the big, strong male love interest (ick). And the rest of the time, she's an unstoppable badass who can fall out of the sky and ride a dragon and be just fine! Except for when there's a plot reason or a man around. Then she's made of spun glass and needs to be handled with care.
At least make it make sense, y'know?
It also needed a better editor, tbh. My writer/editor brain kept flagging issues with the pacing and the tone.
Honestly, based on stylistic tone, it feels like it was meant to be a YA (not a bad thing), but because the publisher is a romance house, they jammed sex into it to make it appeal to an adult audience. It's jarring.
Anyway. Yeah. Not a fan. Sorry to anyone who likes it 😅
It's just very not much my cup of tea as a fellow disabled author with EDS who can't turn the EDS off when it's convenient.
#I also think Yarros has a lot of internalized ableism to deal with#and I really wouldn't care save for the fact I can't escape this fucking book
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Drawing on Magma went pretty crazy last night lmfao
(3rd drawing of me courtesy of @simoondraws)
#drawing#sketch#epic the musical#epic odysseus#Hermes is now in the arms dealing business#epic hermes#there was so much more but these are just the drawings by me and of me#everyone is so fucking skilled at drawing I can't even#you guys are so cool#artists on tumblr
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Been rereading Little Women recently... or technically, properly reading it for the first time. The last time I touched this book was when I was ten, and the book I touched was a shortened chinese edition (or was it just the first half? anyway) Here are the sisters in 21 century post covid and I think Beth would've loved the groundbreaking invention that is the Hoodie
#i know she plays the piano guys. i read the book#just need to give her smth to carry and decided fuck it my girl knows her strings. piano is part string certainly this isn't a stretch#<- just didn't want to draw keys#behold. you can't tell me jo wouldn't jump at the chance to hack her hair off. she's dyke now deal with it#jo is also a jocky nerd btw#amy's stuff is just what i carry on a weekly basis. go amy#me adding jewelry to meg's fit: heeheehoohoo#art#illustration#character design#artist on tumblr#little women#louisa may alcott#little women fanart#character illustration#character art#meg march#jo march#beth march#amy march#wigglybunfish
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❝Penguin. I saw a documentary on them. They are adorable, but can be pretty vicious. Sounds like you.❞
FIRST KANAPHAN as KANT PATTANAWATand KHAOTUNG THANAWAT as BISON episode 3 of THE HEART KILLERS
#the heart killers#the heart killers the series#first kanaphan#khaotung thanawat#firstkhao#firstkhaotung#kantbison#gmmtv series#gmmtv bl#thai bl#mlm#thkedit#th: the heart killers#bibi gifs#userrlana#tusermona#tuserhidden#tuserrowan#see i wish i could be normal about this scene#i clearly can't since the pilot trailer#and i definitely can't now#so you'll have to deal with it#i love how into it they both are here#kant's smirk?#fuck off#and how pleased bison was? amazing#unfortunately the ring light was a nightmare
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the callum / runaan dynamic is so funny bc like. out of nowhere your daughter has a boyfriend who happens to be the most wildcard character you imagine she could find - human (mind you you're currently in the process of unlearning all your racial prejudices), magical, and a government official in addition to all of his other Emo Personal Lore - and they're the most beautifully devoted but also most painfully public affection-displaying couple you've ever seen and the guy also kind of freed your soul from purgatory plus you love and trust your daughter so basically you just kind of have to Deal With It. yet it would seem he's determined to make that as difficult as possible because he is the biggest fucking dork you have ever met in your life and it seems you are the only person who is bothered by this because your husband is amused, your daughter thinks he is the greatest thing to ever happen, and the dumbass himself attempts to show you some respect but also apparently refuses to stop being cringe so now you must continue on with your life while this loser teenager does your daughter in the room next to yours every night and you can't do anything about it because oh yeah you killed his father
#like he's just There#like rayla's just like “oh yeah he lives here now” and YOU CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT#because they are in no place to be disapproving of rayla over anything#and again of course he is so good to her and he makes her so happy and you can't deny they are in unfathomable amounts of love#so yeah ok you have to tolerate him but you'd think he'd act like someone who is living with his girlfriend's parents whom he just met#and yeah he does try to suck up but he's also acting a fool every day of his life and is apparently not looking to change that#and he is not AT ALL shy with your child and will suck her face off any chance he gets#and rayla is so smart and strong and capable that you know she knows exactly what she's doing#and-#i cannot fucking say this enough#-you just have to *DEAL WITH IT.*#rayllum#moonfam#runaan#tdp runaan#callum#tdp callum#rayla#tdp rayla#tdp s7#tdp spoilers#tdp#the dragon prince#continuethesaga#giveusthesaga#tdp fav tag#self fav tag i hate myself
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A collection of Viktor being framed by a halo through Arcane, because I'm still going insane about how GOOD this show's art, composition and details are!
Feel free to add more, I'd love to see the ones I might have missed
#Viktor#arcane#THIS SHOW!!!#I CAN'T FUCKING DEAL WITH IT DJBFGF#arcane season 2#arcane season two#arcane spoilers
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Hey, if you have speech impediments, you are so amazing.
If you stutter or have a lisp or misspeak easily or you have a flat affect or a limited verbal vocabulary or if your voice is AAC or if you just have a difference in your vocality, you are so incredibly important and amazing.
Just know that your voice is yours. Nobody will ever be able to truly take it away. Your voice is part of you, and you deserve to make it as true to you as you deem fit. I hope you have the space to grow with your voice and whatever about it makes it unique.
#positivity#disability positivity#partially because so much of voical differences arise from disability#i've developed a really annoying lisp-ish issue#and it's hard to be positive about it because it makes me feel like i'll be treated as lesser because it's a 'childish' affect#but i literally can't help it unless i spend 110% of my focus on it. and i don't have that amount of energy#but it makes me think about others and especially those who have it more intensely than i do#and i just want to uplift everybody because vocal differences are neutral at worst#man my dad always tells a story about this coworker he had who had a stutter like you wouldn't believe...#...and he was fucking BRUTALIZED for it... 'c-c-c-c-CAN YOU GET TO THE POINT?!' is how people would talk to him...#...and obviously that made his stutter twice as fucking worse and i can't imagine the shame and humiliation that followed...#...i hope he learned that those assholes were a fucking waste of time and that he doesn't have to deal with that...#...like i'm sorry but there is no fucking need to be that sadistic toward somebody who is obviously already anxious and worried
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How many people witnessed softie food addict horror who needed something in his mouth or he would actively kill and turn to cannibalism 🧍♀️ or was that just me.... anyways honestly it was silly.. he'd maybe get along with cook horror... I just like fanon crossovers guys*sadge
Anyways canon horror is also silly(really silly. What an asshole, man)(no seriously he's actually such an asshole.. I might love him for that but-) I don't think he would get along with the others(loser)
#me when I acknowledge as many sides of an argument as possible which just makes me confused because I am trying to take off of other people#but they're so diverse that I can't mix all of it and so I don't know how to interpret any characters anymore and what makes it worse is my#ahh not actually understanding people or relationships because I got minimum emotions maximum carelessness but I also love emotions so I#love the psychological torture of all of this but I also don't understand it so I'm depending on everyone else but yet again they're so#mixed I get confused and I don't know how to deal with any of it so I'm just here standing confused screaming in my own mind as I try to#understand how to make it all work together and then#....#Jesus fuck#sans au#utmv#undertale au#horrortale#horror sans#UwU#anyways disregard any ideas I may have ever because they will always change and I don't know what to do anymore.......#bro I'm boutta resort to Wattpad fics.... get ready for Wattpad highschool fic😼/j#I want to do that but I lost my fluidity in writing sighs...#I never graduated from Wattpad sorry guys😔#I didn't do that well drawing canon horror tbh but it'll have to do
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Nathan Page as Detective Inspector Jack Robinson ↳ Miss Fisher and the Crypt of Tears
#miss fisher's murder mysteries#miss fisher and the crypt of tears#mfmm#period drama#perioddramaedit#film#filmedit#jack robinson#nathan page#my edits#he is so fucking buff in cot i can't deal#it almost distracts me from how much the funeral scene fucks me up#'fucks me up' as in jack robinson is fully having a mental breakdown and phryne goes ':D' and i thought i was losing my mind
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Blood Blossom lore for the Blood Blossom Au
Blood Blossoms -- otherwise scientifically known as rosa hemato -- are an extinct genus of flower from the rosaceae family that disappeared from the mortal plane in the late 1600s due to over-foraging from settlers during the Witch Trials. Prior to their extinction, they were already a rare breed of rose because of an evolutionary trait resulting in their main source of energy being ambient ectoplasm.
This means that blood blossoms only grow in areas where there are unusual levels of ectoplasm present. Regardless, however, only one or two bushes of blood blossoms can grow, as too many of them results in the ectoplasm being sucked out with no room of replenishing back to its original levels. This kills the blood blossoms in return. So a balance has to be met.
Blood blossoms have a mildly unsettling appearance. Their namesake, "blood blossom", comes from the blood red appearance of their petals, which start out as a vibrant red but steadily grows darker with age similar to blood drying on a page. Their stems, leaves, and thorns are, rather than green, a rich black-purple color. The center where the pistil sits is the typical yellow, however, it takes on the appearance of a yellow eye peering through the petals.
Blood blossoms emit a sweet, fragrant scent that allows them to not only attract bees, but also break down ectoplasm for consumption. See, what it does is that it discharges some of its pollen into the air, which then "latches on" to ecto. As the pollen begins to float down to the ground, the ectoplasm then sinks into the soil for the blood blossom to then draw into its roots. It gives the ectoplasm a physical body to latch onto, which it then uses to consume it.
Despite having a symbiotic relationship with ambient ectoplasm in it's natural habitat, the interactions it has with ghosts is an entirely different story. To ghosts, Blood Blossoms are terrifying, opportunistic parasitoids capable of consuming spirits whole if given the chance. Ghosts give off significantly more ectoplasm and when the blood blossoms sense that, they emit more pollen in order to consume it. Which is where the whole "blood blossoms are natural ghost shields" thing comes from.
Their sweet scents and vibrant colors made them popular upon discovery for perfumes and dyes, and when eaten taste sweet and slightly bitter, almost irony. Which is another reason for their namesake. During the Salem Witch Trials it was theorized that blood blossoms could expel the sins/demons from someone's body when consumed and prevent possession, or when surrounded by the roses, would trap the demons inside it's host body which would then be burned to banish it back to Hell along with the soul of it's host.
Which made them incredibly popular in executions, exorcisms, and Mass.
They could grow anywhere in the world so long as there was an adequate amount of ecto present.
Surprisingly enough, they do not commonly grow in or around gravesites due to a competitor flower nicknamed "rest in peace lilies" which, despite their name, are actually from the asparagaceae family and have more in common with bluebells. They're more modernly known as everlast bells. Ghosts prefer them over blood blossoms because they have a similar effect on ghosts as poppies do on the living where it sends them into a restful slumber. Hence their nickname "rest in peace lilies". The dead loove them.
In the Ghost Zone, their effects on the dead are far more potent than when they grew in the living realm due to the excessive amount of ectoplasm. They also grow much faster, so ghosts treat their appearances on islands similar to how one treats mint or kudzhu after finding it growing in their lawn: with extreme prejudice. And a lot of terror. Ghosts tend to rip them out when the flowers are not in bloom, or burn them when they are.
Their appearances in the Zone aren't much different than what they looked like in the living realm, with only a few mild changes like their thorns being sharper, their petals being more angular, and their eye-like center actually looking more like an eye. It's theorized that the Infinite Realm versions of blood blossoms gained very mild sentience, just enough that it almost feels like their eyes follow you when you pass by them, like a painting. Nobody is willing to test that theory.
To a ghost, getting caught in the hooks of a blood blossom means a slow, agonizing death akin to thousands of needle-sized mouths eating you all at once. The pollen doesn't stop until the ectoplasm is all broken down. Blood blossoms in the Ghost Zone are very much capable of eradicating a ghost entirely, core and all, with no chance of return. No passing go, no reconstruction, just complete oblivion.
Danny, prior to his poisoning, had severe allergic reactions when in physical contact with blood blossom in his human form. Rashes, blistering, hives wherever the blossom had physical contact with, inflammation, you name it. Luckily that hadn't been something he needed to worry about since they're, well, extinct.
#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc crossover#danny phantom#blood blossoms#blood blossom au#dpxdc au#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc#There is a way to synthetically regrow blood blossoms in the mortal realm. it just takes a little ectoplasm. some roses. and a lot of time#and patience#you can't stop starry from worldbuilding he's just gonna do it when you're not looking. its so fun <333 the blossoms having eye centers was#unintentional when i was drawing them. but it looked too good for me to get rid of. so!! creepy eye flowers :)#allies Vlad may have had in the ghost zone immediately jump ship when they caught wind of what he did to Danny. that's certified fucking#crazy right there and there's no way they're sticking around a dude who'd willingly destroy another ghost#vlad used the blood blossoms from the ghost zone to make the toxin so it was far more potent than it would have been if it was the original#mortal flower. fuck this dude#the thorns themselves aren't dangerous to ghosts but the pollen and blooms are so if they're not in bloom its safer to go near them.#specialized ghost equipment however is still required and advised for dealing with blossom infestation
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just had the thought 'in the end the most important thing varric taught rook was how to make a home for, with, and in other people' and then I had to go lie down on the floor and clutch at my head in unceasing agony for a few hours, as you may well imagine. hawke and the kirkwall crew........ in the end you kind of saved the world a bit in the most characteristically indirect and chaotic of ways. not by anything in particular that you did or achieved or accomplished (lmao imagine!), but just by -- having existed, and by the love that was always there, despite it all, in all its imperfections, even when no one was saved by it in the end. you're not here right now and you're not quite haunting the narrative but I hear your voices bickering and arguing and laughing from the other room. (and so, I think, does varric. all the time.)
'did you think you mattered, hawke? did you think anything you ever did mattered?' yeah actually, varric says with da2 and keeps saying through the series. you were here. and I loved you. and as it turns out that mattered more than almost anything in the world, no matter how long it lasted or how fucked up it was at the time or what else happens, because varric manages to pass that feeling, that intangible... home, that echo of you all as you were together, that love, hopefully the best parts of it, on to someone else for them to bring with them on their journey, with their family. and maybe the world will be kinder this time. you never know. merrill's line of 'Everything affects everything. We were born, a bunch of things happened, and now we're in a mess with our friends.' varric's greatest fear of becoming his parents. even through the wreck and the ruin of the world, ghosts upon ghosts upon ghosts of love -- malcolm hawke, who we never even see, but his life touched hawke's and hawke's touched varric's and varric's touched rook's and rook is passing it on to the family they're creating. the unbroken legacy of love shines through in ways that are stronger and stranger than any magic. help
#I woke up. I opened my eyes. this insight hit me over the head like the fist of god. what the fuck. what the FUCK#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#hawke#varric tethras#dragon age 2#dragon age meta#let me live please I've barely reached consciousness I can't deal with this#the kirkwall gang.#what if they were secretly the most important people who ever existed. just because they existed. and for the love that was there#yeah you know what? that's not the worst legacy in the world is it.#da:tv really is da2 2 in some key ways. to me. one of the most da2 lovers or all time#also extremely da2 and also varric core for varric to adopt a kid (as a full adult) completely alone with hawke possibly dead#and STILL somehow manage to make it a varrichawke lovechild on some level. not romantic not platonic but something even more insane#every day varric is unbearably intimate with hawke through the narrative in ways he simply Cannot be with anyone in real life#(in ways you perhaps Should not be in real life. also. lol)#he keeps moving on no matter what b/c that's what you do. but I think varric's real home isn't even kirkwall or a place at all#it's a time. and that time is da2. or at least the story of da2 that he tells himself.#also also what about them themes around parenthood huh. I think varric in the end at least did not become his parents. thank god#trauma gets passed down. but so do other things and you have choices about what you want to leave behind#for those who come after you.#*tears streaming down my face* guess I have to go make breakfast and pretend everything is normal then. sick and twisted
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"My mother once told me she would've named me Laura." - Laura Jane Grace
#her fucking smile !!!#the way you can hear the crowd shout 'laura'#i'm obsessed#against me!#laura jane grace#against me new wave#against me the ocean#also not the point but she's so hot in this clip i can't deal#trans#flashing#flashing lights
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