#he used me
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#trauma#trauma core#trauma vent#traumacore#childhoodcore#childhood trauma#childcore#actually traumatized#tw sa mention#tw sa#tw csa implied#tw csa#tw child abuse#i was a child#tw child s3xual abus3#tw abuse#tw implied abuse#tw assault#child abuse#sa implied#he used me#i feel sick#men scare me#daddy issues
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you cared about my skin more than you cared about me
To you,
All I was,
Was skin.
Something for you to touch,
And rub up on.
Now i’m another name on your
List of bodies,
Drowned out by the others that came before
And the ones that’ll come after.
You’ll forget about me soon enough,
But I won’t
Because you were never just skin to me.
I saw you,
At least the version of you
you let me see
And I accepted it wholeheartedly
Because I never saw you as a body.
I saw you as a boy who was hurting and needed someone to
Help get him back on his feet,
Make him feel cared about.
I tried my best and you never did,
You made me feel replaceable.
I mean you were talking to other people
The whole time
But I never brought it up
Because we never dated
And again,
All I was to you, was skin.
Someone you could have sex with whenever
You wanted to because I didn’t know better.
There were times when I didn’t want to have sex
And we would anyway because I knew it’s what you wanted.
I didn’t want to say no,
So I convinced myself otherwise because
I just wanted to be close to you.
To lay down
And have you kiss me without
There being another motivation behind it,
But that never happened
And now your gone
You cared about my skin more than you cared about me
#original poem#poetry#slam poets on tumblr#poem#short poem#poems and poetry#poets on tumblr#slam poetry#tumbler tusday#writers and poets#spilled ink#ink blots#the used#he used me#body#skin to skin#we'll never have sex#i don't know you#words words words#spilled words#words#you're gone#heartache#leave me#alexxisokay poem#alexxisokay#poems on tumblr#writers on tumblr#used#another body
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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girldad mode activate
#I'd trust him to buy me pads#at home he'd always have clean pads ready in case#they're not for him to use. if he's trans his ass is in menopause#chilchuck tims#dungeon meshi#izutsumi#comic#my art
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MONKEY MAN (2024)
#augh it was so good i couldn't stop thinking about it#and also i need to rewatch it because i kept getting distracted by dev patel's big beautiful eyes.....#does he have a licence for those#the mythology the politics the sectarian strife the hijra community and outsiders... he wove so many things together so beautifully#and also. he gave us an adorable dog. which is necessary to me.#and also he took his shirt off multiple times.#monkey man#dev patel#vipin sharma#spoilers#long post#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#lgbtqia
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Bruce Wayne except he texts like an ominous boomer
wdym you can't tell if he's threatening them?
Based on this post by @mysterycitrus :)
<- Prev Masterlist Next ->
Bonus:
Happy birthday, Tim 🥰
#duke thought for a minute he was gonna become the protagonist of get out#u can interpret this as bruce suddenly deciding to text like this#or his children just never getting used to it even after 10+ years of knowing him#bruce: i dont understand why my children are so paranoid#clark: last night you texted me ''see you soon...'' and i wasnt sure if you were threatening me or not#social media au#batfam#batfamily#dc comics#bruce wayne#dick grayson#cassandra cain#jason todd#stephanie brown#tim drake#duke thomas#damian wayne#incorrect quotes#tweets#texts#twitter#batdad#batkids#batman#fanatical posting#crack
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Following the author of The Last Unicorn on Facebook is the only thing that makes being on that site worthwhile.
(source)
#hope#good things#not me crying as one of the founding pillars of my core personality trembles at recognition from its creator#wholly believe this guy and this story he wrote are the reasons i became a writer#but this too is in the story#and i internalized it so deep#this is why my blog is the way it is#this is why i believe as long as there is one of us left standing with hope#that we stand a chance
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name a more iconic thing to happen for the fictional qpr community than Donna Noble quite literally meeting her soulmate and being like hmm. there's no one I've ever wanted to fuck less
#i cannot get over how much she's like.#im crazy insane about this alien our lives and beings are intertwined#to be separate would and did require us to tear ourselves apart#and build back from the ground up#he is also completely and utterly unattractive to me. lol.#doctor who#tennant doctor#donna noble
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his smile and optimism…….gone………
#halflings being treated so horribly and being used as bait and him making a union so others dont get treated as badly as he did. ourgh#no wonder hes defensive and doesnt trust people. it makes me tear my hair out#my silly little rabbit…………#chilchuck tims#dunmeshi
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#ok no but for real this is genuinely my friend group.#the only one that's a little iffy is the anime catgirl bc 98% of us are dudes. with the exception of me and one other#we even have a union guy 😭#side note chilchuck's name would 100% be Chris if he was a real guy. he's such a Chris. (I mean it COULD be chuck but. Chris is better)#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#senshi of izganda#izutsumi#marcille donato#laios touden#chilchuck tims#chilchuck#falin touden#astronomically random
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Hey remember how Noir is an anti-fascist from 1933
#they would get along so well tho its ok#Noir is 90 yrs behind the times but he got the spirit#he can roll with us lmao 🤘🏽#spiderverse#spiderverse 2#across the spiderverse#atsv#atsv fanart#atsv hobie#atsv noir#hobie brown#spider punk#spider noir#noirpunk#art#my art#cw outdated terminology#cw offensive terminology#nonblacks plz interact and tell me Im funny youd be doing a service to the community /hj#my comics
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i used to be so good at writing strong, thoroughly-researched, thoroughly-edited essays.
as a kid in hs, my teacher literally came up to me, holding my 40 page essay on the intersection of the European witch hunts and capitalism/exploitation/gender roles (it was supposed to be 7 pages...whoops) and went like "this is literally a master's-degree level thesis. what are you doing?? you could literally use this as your final dissertation in a master's program, what the fuck."
NOW??? NOW?? you'd think I'd be oh so skilled. but alas. i can barely piece together two ideas. adhd skill-regression is so so real. im SOBBING
#this is just me ranting sorry#im very tired and hungry#and i want to sleep but brain go brrrrr#well i used to be nice and smart and now im neither of those or however the song goes#pretty sure he was exaggerating cause looking back. it was good. but some of the wording was a lil wonky#adhd#actually adhd#executive dysfunction#actually neurodiverse#adhd paralysis#adult adhd#attention deficit hyperactivity disorder#adhd hacks#academia#neurodivergent#adhd skill regression#confessions of a burnt out gifted kid#<< i guess#former gifted kid#burnt out gifted kid#gifted kid burnout#realizing i sound rly pretentious here sorry -- formal speech patterns i picked up as an autistic child and never put down again haha
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Yeah. so. episode three
#im SO normal about them#kinger likes to sleep in darkness bc he feels closer to his wife#can i kms#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#also yeah. he's using her coat as a pillow#haha#suffer with me#the amazing digital circus#tadc#kinger#tadc kinger#queenie#tadc queenie#kinger x queenie#tf is their ship name btw#the amazing digital circus kinger#the amazing digital circus queenie#the amazing digital circus fanart#tadc fanart#my art#fanart#checkmates#found their ship name!
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Hey now, Let her cook!
#dungeon meshi#chilchuck tims#senshi#laios touden#marcille donato#izutsumi#oyasumi punpun#<- In case you are wondering what the source for the little bird guy is.#Yeah that's right. I'm back to my extremely obscure crossover BS.#Punpun is one of those series that falls under the category of 'Good! but I cannot responsibly recommend this to anyone."#If Dungeon Meshi is like a friend asking you to go on a quick errand and you accidently go on a life changing roadtrip -#Punpun is your friend asking to go on a quick errand and they pull up to the vet and tell you your dog is being put down.#Then they explode into sludge. Melting your car. You hitchhike back but the person who picked you up is an axe murderer.#I could not finish it. My friends who did say it was good. But agree it was for the best I did not finish it.#Hey speaking of tone twists...We are one episode away from one of my favourite chapters being animated!#WHO'S READY FOR THE SENSHI BACKSTORY! WHO IS READY TO CRY!#ME! I AM! I spooked my flatmate with how energetic I was this morning. I'm vibrating with energy I was not designed to contain.#I should talk about today's episode here: It was very good. I love how they animated the familiars.#And!!! Anime only people now are in the loop on the Chilchuck lore. Part 1 of many. He still contains multitudes.#They all do to be honest! If this episode told us anything it was that we still don't know these characters as well as we think!#See you guys next week. I'll be inconsolable.
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Keep thinking about that one scene in secret life
#it was so silly i've had this visualised in my head for ages#actually sick of this comic now tho the colouring made me question tf I've been doing for 10 years#anyway#the sillies#not set on any of these designs btw and Scott isn't in his band outfit BC he isn't part of it yet in the series#which is the excuse I'm using bc I haven't solidified that design yet#tag time#secret life#life series#scott smajor#smajor1995#trafficblr#jimmy solidarity#goodtimeswithscar#this probably the second comic I've ever finished ever so#IM LEARNING OK#fandumb fanart#ALSO ALSO guess where I got the death messages the
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sometimes u just gotta remind yourself that while ace attorney is about law and justice and stuff it is also about a bunch of young adults living in [CALIFORNIA]
#ace attorney#phoenix wright#apollo justice#klavier gavin#ema skye#maya fey#aa4#lana skye#mia fey#gyakuten saiban#klapollo#sorry this is so dumb i have a sad comic planned so i have to get my sillies out#my art#cw drug use#also before anyone yells at me abt how klavier wouldn’t smoke bc of his voice#a) he’d do it very rarely and probably almost always socially#and b) u know he made phoenix put ice in that bong. you KNOW he did#meanwhile ema keeps at least 2 cartons of cigarettes on her at all times#shes just like me fr
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