#have other people talked about this yet because I haven’t seen any posts in the tags
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Harassment within the My Time At Sandrock Community (and Pathea’s enabling of which)
For those who aren’t a part of the Pathea server or any related fan server, it’s a rather well known fact that Pathea is weirdly inconsistent about enforcing the rules with their server. I say “weirdly” not because it’s beyond understanding, but because the reasons I’ve been given are so utterly bizarre that they wouldn’t even be in the realm of something I would assume just based on my personal experiences with poor moderation.
As someone who has been a part of several Ye Olde Internet forums, I’ve had my share of bad mod experiences. When the issues weren’t the mods themselves, it was mods overextending themselves when the forum got too large (which usually happened when the forum was a part of a more “official” entity that didn’t want to hire more mods). The lack of mod oversight would often lead to extensive user harassment, as not having enough mods meant some folks just fell through the cracks.
Neither of these, to my knowledge, are the issues with Pathea’s server, but rather with the culture they’ve allowed to propagate in their community. I’ve spoken with a number of people who have confirmed that the real reasons they are neglectful is because of the relationship they have with certain users, namely the fear of “controversy” or “bad PR” from said users.
This has lead to a toxic environment within Pathea’s own server as they’re reluctant to ban certain users that have been targeting others within the community. And although the people being targeted aren’t all queer creators, a lot of them are.
This might not be anything new to folks in the know, but I figured I would talk about this on Tumblr because I haven’t seen anyone mention it yet. I also feel compelled to speak out on a related issue as Pathea’s issues with regulating their server extends to the enabling of user harassment across their socials.
One of my friends, Snowy, is being targeted by a user popular within the Pathea server. This person has been harassing them on Tumblr — starting earlier this year and persisting throughout — up until Snowy turned off anons. These are the receipts that Snowy posted to the Eufala Outback as proof that this has been going on for the last several months:
We all know who is doing this but are reluctant to name them, because they have somehow convinced a number of people close to them that Snowy is the one harassing them. And they’ve been working at this for a long time to where Snowy has repeatedly found themselves quietly blocked by folks they thought they were friends with.
More specifically, before anons were turned off, this situation was escalated by a person Snowy trusted with the knowledge of who this person was, thinking they were trustworthy enough to speak with them about the harassment they’ve been dealing with for several months. Instead, this person turned around and told the person who’s been harassing them about what they said, and then proceeded to spread lies that Snowy was the one harassing the person who’s been sending them anon hate.
Interestingly, being tangentially involved in all of this resulted in me being removed (and I think, banned considering I can no longer find the sever when I search for it on Discord) from a fan server I signal boosted a while back. I genuinely do not know what was told to the people in charge of this server, but seeing as they were unwilling to speak with Snowy to corroborate the story, and decided my mere association with them was enough to have me removed from the server, I don’t feel I’m being unfair by saying they’re complicit in the harassment of Snowy.
In any case, this has escalated further to where now these people recently got Snowy suspended as mod of Pathea’s official subreddits. The reasons being that the mods were receiving multiple complaints from different users claiming — without any evidence, mind you — that Snowy was harassing people.
When Snowy tried to appeal the ban by showing the Pathea mods that it was actually them that was the target of harassment, they responded that they wouldn’t repeal the decision because “they didn’t want controversy,” and, in Snowy’s own words, “Pathea didn’t even want to read my receipts.”
I’m making this post because I feel that this will not end here. I feel that logically the next step these people will take is to get Snowy banned from the official subreddit as well as the Pathea server. They have already made it a point to ostracize them from a number of people within the community, and Pathea being complicit in this makes me doubt that they’re willing to prevent that from happening. And so my only recourse is to make a post about it on Tumblr to make people more aware of this is going on.
To the folks who are involved: I think you should reconsider what you’ve heard regarding this matter. I’ve spoken to a few friends who are not a part of the MTAS fandom, and they all agree this is probably the worst case of harassment we’ve seen in a long time. The person spearheading this is literally employing DARVO tactics to mislead those around them while simultaneously making them complicit in the harassment of my friend. And all over a (harmless) fictional ship from a video game (that happens to be of a gay couple. I mention the ship being gay because that seems relevant to the reason for the harassment.).
With that said, I’m pretty much done with Pathea. I might still talk about and create fanworks for Sandrock, but I’m not playing Evershine until Pathea fixes the culture on their Discord server.
#my time at sandrock#my time at evershine#my time at portia#mtas#pathea#pathea games#pathea critical#pathea criticism
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So the rat grinders for sure beat up snitches and loophole finders and double crossers and stuff right? They are the cogs that grind up the “rats” of society and the school right??? And they’re for sure working for and/or have hacked the warforged emergency backup principal grix, RIGHT??????
#have other people talked about this yet because I haven’t seen any posts in the tags#that are about how 4dognames girl is running for class president on a platform of ‘keeping things fair’???#and the name of their adventuring party is the RAT GRINDERS??????#like yeah they might be the antonyms of the bad kids#but in a strictly follow the rules and no change allowed way???#please tell me other people are seeing this#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhjy#fantasy high junior year
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I haven’t seen many fics about player 333 yet (Myunggi) 😔 Could you do maybe an enemies to lover type story with him!!!
Wicked Game | Myung-Gi Pt. 1
𝚂𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚢: You're stuck in the squid games fighting for your life. It also doesn't help that you are stuck with a wanna be rich scammer fraud.
𝙿𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐: Myung-Gi x GN!Reader (No pronouns used)
𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜: enemies to lovers, hurt
𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝:
𝙰𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚛'𝚜 𝙽𝚘𝚝𝚎: Thank you so much for requesting. I hope you enjoy this! Also the reader is an ex of Myung-Gi before the games. Please understand I don't HATE Kim Jun-hee, I just thought it would fit more for enemies to lovers. I also believe I may put this into two parts as the 3rd season is yet to come
If you would like to be tagged for the next part, let me know in the comments down below and I'll add you to the list!!
Want a request for a Squid Game character like this one? Check out my latest post, read my request guidelines and send a request!
Read on Wattpad & AO3 here
Joining the squid games could possibly be the last thing any person with common sense and a reason to live would consider doing. Unless they either had none.
That's what it looked like for you. The games you had to do to win 45.6 billion won had you either questioning if it's still worth it to still keep going or just to end it all on this island.
Out of all the people in these games, there's one face that you despised seeing and wondered how he's still alive after what he did, Myung-Gi.
He's your ex boyfriend. Being with him was great at first, but once he was invested in the crypto coin thing business, it felt like you're being cheated on. It also didn't help that he had an affair behind your back with a girl named Kim Jun-hee who turned up pregnant.
You didn't hate Kim Jun-hee, as you felt bad for her that your ex abandoned her and their baby, but the whole thing hurted you.
There's nothing more you wanted to get out of here with enough money to move to another place and start off fresh.
When you first woke up in the dormitory with all the other players, you wondered where this possibly could go. You looked around to see so many unfamiliar faces.
Then a man in a pinkish red suit all the way across the room wuth a black covered mas with a white triangle comes out from double doors and starts explaining why majority are here. Because of their debts.
They showed different videos of people playing Ddakji and getting slapped in the face. There was one face you recognized, your ex. It wouldn't be surprising that he was in debt for trying to chase after the crypt coin thing.
It looks like you're not the only one who hated him, many people who fell for the crypto coin were also mad at him. A purple-haired guy stood out from the rest, as he was a rapper you heard from others who were apparently fans. You had no interest in him or your ex but were wondering what the whole ordeal of winning money is.
You had to sign a waiver for the games, and you were soon directed to take pictures. It was rough enough. Then you would have to climb stairs that seemed like you were going to Mount Everest. You saw your ex from the right side across. You also didn't want to risk being seen.
Finally, you reached the first game after what seemed like an eternity. There was a huge robot doll and the whole layout was supposed to imitate a school playground with its blue sky and sand ground.
"Hey there pretty" You turn around and see the purple haired guy who was talking to your ex
"Who are you?" You exclaimed looking him up and down not in the mood to be hit on.
"I'm Choi Seung-hyun, Thanos for my music. You might of heard my raps before?"
"If I did, I probably would want to be deaf right now. Including not hearing this conversation."
He pretended to be hurt and put a hand over his heart.
"Ouch girl. Cold aren't you?"
You rolled your eyes. He sees another girl walks by and also tries talking to her. Poor girl, you thought.
"Y/N?" You hear your name being called and look around.
"Y/N!" A hand fell on your shoulder and you flinched turning around.
It was Myung-Gi. Your panic turned into annoyance as you rolled your eyes again.
"What are you doing here?" He asks
"Should be asking you that too, but I think it's obvious."
"Can we please talk?"
"What's there to talk about Myung-Gi? You chose a cyrpt coin over me and cheated on me, and got another girl pregant"
"And I regret it very much. Please come back."
"Share those regrets with the others in here too, including the mother of your child."
He tried to reply back but you walked away from him, ignoring him.
Speakers came on, explaining the rules of the game.
A screaming man came into the front and said it's not what we think the game is. He exclaims that if you move, you'll die.
People around you scoffed and found the man crazy. It seemed like to you he was crazy too, but what if he was right?
He was still screaming telling people not to move a muscle when the game starts.
The robot started turning around and putting her hand up to the tree to not look at the other player.
It started singing.
"Everyone freeze!" The man in front says.
Nobody moved a muscle. Your eyes looked around and saw no one moving. What if the guys telling the truth?
The doll looked away and you started moving forward quickly along with everyone else.
"Everyone freeze!" Yelled again the older man.
There was a scream coming from a girl who moved. She laughed exclaiming she just moved. A bullet came through her head and she dropped dead.
The guy really wasn't lying then. One wrong move, you're dead. More people started moving and more gunshots were coming.
Bodies were dropping. People are screaming. This was a bad idea to be here. You were also pretty sure you were going to die with your ex boyfriend. That another cherry on top to add.
"If you don't make it to the finishing line on time, you'll also die." The man yells but has his mouth covered like he was going to take a sneeze.
It felt impossible to win this game. You were so sure you were going to win money but now the only thing you could be winning is death. You wanted to see if Myung-Gi was still alive.
But you couldn't risk being shot. Everyone sooned formed into a single file line. The man explained that the doll can't see what's behind a person if there's a bigger person in front.
More gunshots came. More bodies dropping. You couldn't stop now though. You're close to the finish line, you can feel it.
You soon reached the finish line relieved that you made it alive. You looked around for Myung-Gi to see if he's alive.
Why do you care so much about him? You thought to yourself.
It's just basic human sympathy you thought. Hating him is one thing, but him dying is another.
The game ended and you witnessed the man who warned about the game, you see his number was 456 and another, a woman helping a man who got shot in the leg reach the finish line get shot in the head.
This isn't just a game. This life or death. Everyone including you who passed were allowed to go back to the dorms.
Zoned out walking, seeing bodies and blood, you hear your name being called.
"Y/N!"
Turning around to see who called your name, you see Myung-Gi run up to you.
"Hey, are you okay?"
A light smile came from your face.
"Yes I'm alright and you?"
"Alive thank God." He chuckled.
You chuckled lightly but didn't know what to say after. Usually, you would have something smart to say to him but after what happened, you wanted nothing more to be out of here.
There were yelling and shouts to how the man knew they would shoot if you lost the game. They were accusing the man of being behind the game.
A pink guard then came out and congratulated us for completing the first game. It then if a majority voted to O, you could leave the game.
Everyone chose their own sides O and X. You chose X, even though you desperately wanted the money to be able to move to another city. You see Jun-Hee, his other ex, chose X too. Myung-Gi chose O, which you weren't surprised.
Unfortunately there were more O's than X's which meant you had to stay. You were heartbroken but also upset and turned to Myung-Gi. Now you wish he died in the first game.
You went up to him and turned him around aggressively and slapped him across the face. People looked at you guys, but you didn't care.
"You're really that selfish, you had to choose O?"
"Y/N-"
"The mother of your child is in this game and you choose O. I should have known from the start dating you was a bad idea. If these games don't kill you, I will."
You stormed off away from him and went to your bed. Myung-Gi probably thought you were bluffing about you killing him.
Something deep down you wanted to keep that word true.
It looks like you'll have to wait and see the next day.
𝙽𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚐𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 | 𝙼𝚊𝚒𝚗 𝙼𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚂𝚚𝚞𝚒𝚍 𝙶𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝙼���𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝙹𝚘𝚒𝚗 𝚖𝚢 𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝!
#creamecafe#squid game x reader#squid game#squid game spoilers#squid game masterlist#lee myung gi imagine#lee myung gi x reader#lee myung gi#squid game scenario#reader insert#gender netural#gender neutral reader#gn!reader#gn!y/n#enemies to lovers#exes to lovers#lee myung gi scenario#lee myung gi fanfiction#player333#player333 x reader#player 333
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random astrology notes volume 4
༄ ҉ tw: trauma and abuse - please do not read this post if you’re sensitive to any of these subjects and understand that astrology does not guarantee anything
༄ ҉ these notes are based upon isolated placements and aspects, so take these with a grain of salt and remember that the entire chart matters
☁️ every taurus i’ve met has been super shy in the beginning but then once i get to know them they’re one of the craziest people i’ve ever met. i think it’s crazy when i see people call them boring. if you think they’re boring it usually means they haven’t come out of their comfort zone around you yet. what i love about them is that they can be really fun but at the same time have a good balance of knowing when to be serious/chill as well
☁️ cancer suns are often good at understanding peoples emotions and if evolved this can be a good thing because they will have a sweet and caring nature. if unevolved though this could manifest as them trying to emotionally manipulate others and use their weaknesses against them
☁️ i’ve heard people say leo’s or sagittarius’ have the biggest egos but from my perspective it’s the pisces suns. i believe this to be true when they’re unevolved because the sun is associated with the ego and pisces is ruled by both jupiter and neptune. jupiter represents abundance and neptune represents delusion which means having an abundance of ego and extreme delusion in regards to your identity/self
☁️ libra suns daddy issues aren’t talked about enough. the sun is associated with the father and it’s in fall when in the sign libra. 7h suns can also have a hard time forming a close bond with their father because of this since the 7th houses natural ruler is libra, or they could have a father who was abusive in some way
☁️ pisces tend to do this thing where they try to heal everyone around them and have this mentality of “i can fix them”.. trust me you can’t fix everyone. it’s best to be with people who bring out the best version of you and help you grow as a pisces
☁️ everyone i know with a gemini moon in the 9th house is fucking hilarious. like i die every time i’m with them. they’re also just really friendly usually and i feel like i learn so much random things when i’m with them. some of these things may not even be useful but it still fascinates me
☁️ gemini/sagittarius risings typically have lots of hobbies. they usually dabble in everything and are happiest when they’re constantly doing something or learning new things. when they sit still for too long or isolate themselves they usually spiral into a depression from what i’ve seen
☁️ every person i know with a capricorn rising or capricorn rising degree (10°/22°) talks in such a classy and intelligent way. for example: ariana grande, olivia rodrigo, jenna ortega, etc. they come off as old souls to me. a lot of them have dry humor as well
☁️ gemini/virgo placements make really good mental health advocates and are good at relating to others and making them feel like they’re not alone. especially if these signs are in their big six
☁️ everyone talks about mars/pluto in 1h people coming off as intimidating but chiron in 1h people be scaring me too sometimes. i don’t know what it is. some people say chiron has no effect on appearance but when in the 1h i’ve noticed it does make someone have an rbf and seem like they’re judging everyone when they’re not
☁️ venus at 27° can indicate being attracted to really intelligent and spiritual people. the downside is sometimes it can bring challenges in your love life due to numerology. 2 doubles the energy of any number it’s next to and 7 is the most challenging number when it comes to romance. this isn’t because anything is wrong with people that have this placement but because people with this placement are often extremely misunderstood by others. even when it comes to their platonic connections
☁️ placements that are at 1° in your chart can show areas in which you may be more immature or have a lot of growing to do. someone having more than two of these degrees could indicate anger issues and having a big ego if the person is at a lower vibration in life
☁️ the sun/uranus at 5° can indicate someone who’s a daredevil and loves having fun and doing a lot of crazy shit. random but they always have the weirdest kinks also
☁️ chiron can tell about your traumas. for example: having it in the 9th house can indicate having deep spiritual wounds involving religious trauma
☁️ juno to jupiter synastry is not ideal in my opinion considering jupiter (zeus) in mythology cheated on juno. more ideal marriage asteroids would be orpheus (3361) to eurydike (75) synastry because orpheus in mythology literally crawled into hell for his wife eurydike. if these asteroids are conjunct, sextile, or trine in synastry it can be very beneficial for a relationship and indicate loyalty as well as the man’s willingness to do anything for the woman
☁️ the fama asteroid (408) tells the specifics of someone’s fame and what it’s like for them as well as drama they tend to get into when famous. for example: hailey bieber and justin bieber have fama to venus synastry and they’re a famous couple but there’s lots of drama surrounding their relationship as well
☁️ venus in the 12th house in composite is so underrated. i see such beautiful couples with this placement. it typically indicates a couple having a deep spiritual connection and possibly knowing one another in multiple past lives. there is the possibility of an obstacle involving delusion in the relationship if there’s harsh aspects to this placement though
☁️ hot take: if you think 6th house energy in synastry or composite is boring it’s likely because you enjoy toxicity or crave someone who acts uninterested in you (at least a little bit). 6th house energy creates the desire to constantly be doing things for one another and helping each other. it makes you want to constantly improve the relationship together. at worst it usually only means being judgmental or critical of each other, but this is typically for the sake of wanting improvement to occur in the relationship or having concern for the other person about something
☁️ a 10th house stellium in composite isn’t always related to being work partners, doing things for the public, or being famous together. the 10th house is also associated with responsibility and stability. this stellium can create a long term relationship/friendship where two people bring out the more humble and responsible sides of one another because of this. at worst it could create a dynamic where one person feels like the other is too bossy and acts like their parent
☁️ having your venus in the 10th house in a relocation chart can mean being more likely to gain success and wealth in that specific location. you could possibly meet lovers through work as well or socialize a lot more in that area. you could even possibly become famous there for something involving the arts such as acting/theater, singing, dancing, painting, etc
☁️ in my personal opinion i think sun lines really are the best lines to live under in your astro world map. there isn’t a lot of cons to them besides maybe having an ego death or obstacles involving the ego in general. other than that these lines can show locations where we’re happiest, attract success, feel most confident, and can gain lots of popularity or even fame
☁️ living under your sun and pluto line in your astro map at the same time will cause you to have lots of ups and downs with happiness. one day you could feel on top of the world and the next you could feel like you wanna reincarnate into a rock instead of going on
☁️ living under a moon zenith on your astro map can be challenging emotionally if your soul is at a lower vibration at the time. you could experience lots of depression or feel more sensitive in a location with a moon zenith. if you’re at a higher vibration this zenith can bring lots of creativity and help your soul grow emotionally though
☁️ your D9 chart in vedic astrology can give hints about what your spouses name will be
☁️ in 2026 people born under the horse vietnamese zodiac will have a beneficial year or learn a very important lesson that helps them in the long run. since it’s a 1 universal year people born under the horse year are especially likely to become more confident this year and have lots of important new beginnings in their life
☁️ in 2027 people born under the ox vietnamese zodiac should lay low. this is because it’s their enemy year and typically in our enemy year either bad karma strikes or we must learn really challenging lessons. as long as you’re a good person this isn’t a negative thing though
☁️ in 2027 people born under the goat vietnamese zodiac will have a beneficial year or learn a very important lesson. since this is an 11 universal year people born under the goat are especially likely to becoming more spiritual this year or gain fame during this year
#astrology#astrology blog#astrology chart#birth chart#astrology community#astro community#asteroid#vietnamese astrology#vedic astrology#d9 chart#astro map#relocation chart#astrocartography#asteroids#asteroid astrology#degree astrology#synastry#composite chart
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YOUR SHOUJO BOYFRIEND!
synopsis: you and the third years in a shoujo manga setting. how will the story proceed?
AUTHORS NOTE: THIS IS A REUPLOAD!!! i posted this fic on my old account which i deleted. so uh yeah. also you are technically y/n but a different y/n in every story ok bye
trey clover [captain of the baseball team!]
drum roll please… presenting trey clover!!! the beloved captain of your high school’s baseball team!!! have you seen him? he’s so kind, and thoughtful… he’s really handsome and tall… lord… have you seen him in his baseball uniform?? his broad shoulders under the gentle light… all the girls are giggling about it!
you’ve also often found yourself following the smell of delicious baked goods… only to find the infamous trey clover handing pastries out to his entire team!! he can cook too?! you drool at the thought of tasting his already amazing-smelling food.
unfortunately, you and him are on different social levels. have you seen him? he’s constantly surrounded by people! the thought of even trying his food is out the window… nevertheless talking to him. you’re more quieter, with a solid, but small group of friends.
that doesn’t mean you or your friends aren’t a fan of him! every time there’s a baseball practice going on afterschool, the bleachers are filled with students alike, wanting to watch their favourite caption (+ the other members, ace and deuce are pretty popular too!) it’s often full of people so you haven’t gotten the chance to fully watch a practice game yet… not until a freezing winter afternoon.
there you were, at the front of the bleachers, with the best view you’ve gotten of any game so far! although cold and shivering, it’s fun to sit with you friends and watch them practice! although your eyes often stray to trey, it’s not like you’re not watching the other members of the team! you’ve talked to deuce before, he’s pretty nice! you wave at him sheepishly while rubbing your shoulders, trying to keep yourself warm.
trey clover is really nice as the rumours say. he’s been watching you the entire time, seeing you shivering, with rosy cheeks and a flushed expression, giggling and laughing with your friends. you’re like a lost puppy! something tugged at his heart in worry, you’re obviously cold.
during break, the other girls watched in envy as trey himself comes up to you and offers you his own scarf! wow! you and your friends silently cheer at the offer. trey couldn’t help but smile. how could the oh-so lovely trey clover not? he loves taking care of his classmates! whether they’re friends or not.
he waves it off, saying you can return it to him tomorrow. you smile at him, and clutch onto the scarf in gratefulness. trey is really a great guy! perhaps you have a chance at becoming friends with him…?
the next day, you bravely march towards trey, only to immediately turn back after seeing him surrounded by a bunch of people. uh oh. maybe you’d return the scarf to him another time. there’s too many people and you were afraid that you’ll get overwhelmed from the staring eyes.
the same thing happened the day after. then the day after that. this goes on for a month or so, until you and him get partnered for a project.
trey was confused the entire time. he’s seen you approach him and then promptly walk away. he though it was cute, but he didn’t understand why you couldn’t just give it to him.
you explained how you got nervous, seeing him surrounded by so many people, and finally gave him the scarf back on a quiet afternoon at the library, mid-science project. he chuckled and heartily accepted this. hence you made a new friend!
trey never seemed to be aware that he’s often surrounded by many people at almost all times. now that you (lowkey) knocked him into reality, he often found himself suddenly alone. trey liked his friends, as well as his alone time. but maybe he was too alone at the moment because he slowly seemed to be attaching himself to you. you were so much more comfortable, definitely less overwhelming compared to being surrounded by so much people. he’s starting to enjoy your company now.
you, however, seemed to be confused as to why he’s suddenly following you. it’s trey clover we’re talking about! the school’s prince charming…!!!
when you asked him, he simply said it was a nice change of pace. what does that even mean??? does he perhaps…? no!! there’s no way!!! you shake your head, panic-stricken. stop being delusional!!!
one crisp morning, trey found you with bandages all over your fingers. are you okay??? what happened??? did you get in a fight??? did you study too hard???
you shake your head, flustered. “it’s not a big deal” you say, smiling. “just some accidents in the kitchen. it’s well taken care of.”
trey sighs. maybe he should start helping you in the kitchen… I mean, he considers himself a pretty decent cook… and he hasn’t baked a sweet treat for you yet!
a while later, as trey started getting gifts from all kinds of people did he start connecting the dots. that’s right… today’s valentine’s day! you probably injured yourself trying to making something for the guy you wanted to confess to. he chuckled. you should’ve just asked him and he would’ve helped you no problem! maybe you just felt shy to ask because he was also a guy…
he tried looking for you, wanting to ask about who this special someone is, only to find you to be nowhere. huh. that’s odd. you were at school this morning… right?!
confused, dazed and guilty about rejecting all those girls today, he opened to his shoe locker to find a cute bag with a bow on it fall to the ground.
he only receives outright confession, never quiet, secret ones like this. this is almost like…
his eyes widen and his ears flush red as he reads your confession letter. oh. he thinks. oh dear.
taking a bite out of your heart shaped cookie, he feels a cavity already forming. it’s too sweet! but no matter, he’ll throughly brush his teeth when he gets home… the only thing on his mind walking home is finishing your (kinda failure?) baked goods and wondering how he should tell you he feels the same way… maybe baking you something too?
cater diamond [social media pretty boy]
selfie, after selfie, after selfie… you mindlessly scroll on cater diamond’s magicam. he’s so photogenic it’s insane. the light always seems to hit the right angle, his eyes are gleaming and childlike… he’s smiling… so handsome.
your finger has hovered over the ‘message’ button on his profile many times, but you sigh to yourself. he probably gets hundreds of dms a day. you’re probably just another number to his follower count. also, hitting someone up online? that’s super unromantic.
you’ve seen cater at school a bunch of times. he’s always taking pictures or flirting with some girl who’s ten times more prettier than you. you have no chance at all! the local celebrity has no time for the likes of you!!!
he’s fun, he’s loud, he’s eccentric… he’s so interesting! you would love to get to know this side of him. little did you know…
you were shuffling through books in the school library during lunch. you forgot to do an assignment and had to hurry before your next class… only to find cater diamond, slumped in a corner, asleep!
it just so happens that the book you wanted was right beside him. as you try to slowly pull the book out, he wakes up. oh no.
he stares at you, wide eyed, before dazing out and leaning his head back. you slowly sat beside him and flipped through the pages, eating your lunch and finishing up your assignment. it was well needed peace and quiet for cater.
that night, you opened your phone to find a pleasant surprise.
cater diamond started following you.
you’ve find to notice a pattern. during lunch, cater could always be at the library, slumped and dazed. no one comes here during lunchtime, except for students who could care less about the mini-celebrity cater diamond. you always assumed he went out to buy food with his friends during lunchtime. guess not.
every now and then, you say beside him silently, eating your lunch and scrolling on your phone. sometimes, he’d strike up a conversation about the latest student gossip, or an assignment he didn’t quite fully understand. but most of the time, it was just comfortable silence.
those ‘every now and then’ turned to everyday. you’d rarely hang outside of lunchtime, due to both of you being caught up in your own social lives, but it was nice nonetheless.
“isn’t it weird?” cater asks one day.
you lift your head up from your phone. “weird what?”
“you’ve see. my social media posts. isn’t it weird that I’m so antisocial here? we rarely even talk.”
you shrug. “I don’t mind. I think you’re great either way.”
cater turned his head towards you. “really? you think I’m great?”
“I’d love to know the fun, wild cater, but I also love the quiet, peaceful cater too.”
“you love it?”
“I love it.”
“well… I love you.”
leona kingscholar [politician’s son]
you couldn’t understand how you could hate someone so much without knowing them all that well, but you did.
leona kingscholar, the snobby rich kid.
you’ve seen his name when grades are posted. and it’s at the very bottom. he sleeps in class (plus, he sits right next to you! how annoying, he snores.) and is rude to almost everybody.
to your horror, he has fans.
you’ve seen parades of girls chase after him during valentines, love letters pile up in his desk, people asking you to send him love confessions on behalf of them. of course, you’re too kind to say no, and deliver the message anyway, only to be rudely scoffed at when you tell them that leona brushed it off.
you, however, manage to keep an outstanding vibe to yourself. you manage to keep good grades, be nice to everyone, have interesting hobbies and talents… you’re a pretty all-round person (as you say)
because of your good impression and responsibility you’ve shown and given to your teachers did they ask you to do some extra credit stuff. to your pleasure, you agreed. except you dropped your books when you found out that the extra credit thing is tutoring leona kingscholar.
“I’m so glad that you’re able to do this. I’m very worried about dear leona, especially considering his home life. I hope you can take good care of him.”
you smile meekly. of course teacher! what couldn’t you do? the easy going, impressionable student!
your ears did pique interested when your teacher mentioned his home life… but what’s that to you anyway? you lost interest quickly.
the clock was ticking and the workbooks between you and leona was pristine and untouched. the desk that separated you two was the only thing that seemed to prevent you from mauling him on the spot.
his hair looked well-kept and clean. his clothes neat and tidy, his bone structure… you shook your head. well, obviously he is handsome. how else does he have all those girls tailing him despite his hideous personality? you friends were excited to see how this ‘date’ (you rolled your eyes) would go. I mean, it is leona kingscholar after all.
although you call him the snobby rich kid, was is the president’s son. or well, used to be. his father stepped down from presidency and leona’s brother, falena, recently won the election from charisma alone.
when you watched him on tv, you scoffed. the kingscholar handsome genes seemed to be going strong, that’s probably what helped falena earn his spot because he is in no way a good politician. falena’s promises hasn’t been met yet, his main concerns benefited the rich (classic classism— no pun intended) and he laughed heartily at almost anything. It made him look pathetic.
as you eyed leona dozing off, you laughed to yourself. at least he’s not president, you thought.
you flicked his forehead. you watched leona flinch and frown. he had this boyish charm to him that made you wanna laugh at everything he does. you chuckled when he glared at you.
“what?” he hissed. meow.
“what do you want to start off with?” you spun the pencil in between your fingers.
leona rubbed his forehead and shuffled through his books and pulled out a math book. “yeah. this one.”
“how much do you want?” leona asked.
“what?”
“money. for you to do the work for me.”
“I don’t want money. I want honest work.”
“everyone wants money.”
“put your wallet away.”
leona stated at you, dumbstruck, and put his wallet away as you instructed.
“ugh snobby rich kids and their money.” you whispered loud enough for him to hear.
“herbivore.”
what kind of insult is that?!
days went by like this. arguing, no work done, leaving frustrated. you still refused to accept money. that would put weight on your conscience. you simply couldn’t.
one day, you started stuffing your face with your lunch that you didn’t have time to eat during school.
leona eyed your food. “lunch? after school? it’s almost 4pm.”
“augh. I know. I don’t feel like eating that much but that means I have to have this again for lunch tomorrow.”
leona took your lunch box and started picking food out and throwing it into his mouth.
“hey!”
“what? you said you don’t feel like eating.”
you calmed back down and watched him eat. “are you sure you’re okay with eating that? I don’t wanna displease mr. money’s food palatte.”
leona shrugged. “I don’t eat much at home.”
oh?
“why?” you asked
“dad’s busy with our dear president. their politic discussion is so annoying. I don’t feel like eating with them.”
you scoffed. “politics? are you sure? whatever I’m hearing from falena sounds like a bunch of bullcrap and rich-guy charisma.”
you hadn’t had the chance to realize what you had said when leona let out a laugh. “I know, right? sick of shit presidents. my dad won’t even listen to me.”
“‘oh your brother’s older, he knows better’” leona said in a mocking tone. “I dunno why he’s always on the birthing order crap.” leona handed you back your empty lunchbox. “you’re not a bad cook.”
you stared at him. you’ve never seen him talk this much in one go. leona seemed to have noticed it himself and coughed.
the next few days went by, a bit more awkward than usual. it was mostly you and him in silence. the arguing seemed to have died down.
since you couldn’t get him to do any work, you decided to catch up on your own.
to your pleasant surprise, leona was helping you! whenever he saw you were stuck on a math question, or a science formula, or any of the sort, he’d watch and explain it to you. you swore he has the lowest grades in the school. how does he know more than you?
leona shrugged. “I can do things if I put my mind to it.”
you slammed your hand on your desk. smiling in thought. as of late, you and leona started getting along better. his smarts made you grow some sort of respect for him.
“if you at least pass all your exams this term, I’ll do anything you ask.”
leona raised an eyebrow. “what?”
“well, you can do all of this right? all you need is a motivator.” you smiled. “we’ve been bantering back and forth this entire time. don’t you want me to stop calling you spoiled? please agree to to this. I really, really want this credit.”
leona pretended to be in thought before nodding. “yeah whatever.”
inner hooray!
weeks went by. leona seemed to have actually started doing his work, handing in assignments, raising his grade…
until he carefully placed multiple tests in front of you with a bright red 100 on the top of each and every one.
“I told you I could do it if I put my mind to it.”
you patted yourself. “I finally trained the animal.”
he ruffled your hair.
the next day, you were getting ready for another afterschool session with leona when your teacher came up to you.
“leona’s grades has been doing so well. I’m glad you were able to put him on track. I added the extra credit on your record. you deserve a break, you can stop tutoring him now.”
oh… right. all of this had to come to a stop eventually.
you went home earlier that day, and suddenly found yourself with so much more free time.
the next few days went by, with no leona in sight. the distaste you usually had for him seemed to wither away… you kind of considered each other as friends. would it be too mushy to say you missed him?
one warm afternoon, at the end of school, you were heading to grab your shoes and leave when a familiar voice called out your name.
leona.
“oh… hi!” you smiled at him. you really, truly didn’t hate him anymore. all of that seemed to be so far ago.
leona spoke in a gruff. “hey… so….”
you knew leona was handsome, no doubt about it. but was he always this oddly attractive? his eyebrows were dark and moody, his eyes (they’re green! you never noticed) glimmered under the sunshine spilling from the windows. he looked to the side, shuffling awkwardly, his hands in his pockets. leona is a confident man. you never saw him so tensed up before.
“you said… if I pass this term you’ll do you anything you want from me, right?”
oh, right. you kinda wished he forgot about that. guess not. better prepare yourself to be his servant, or something. (for some reason, you didn’t seem to mind)
“yeah… I did say that. so. what do you want?”
“I want you to go out with me.”
rook hunt [the competitive dramatics]
is this possible to dislike someone who doesn’t even know you exist?
rook hunt, the king of drama, would be seen whistling tunes from the latest musical he watched, looking over play scripts and performing random acts in the middle of the school hallway. get out! he’s so annoying.
what’s worse is that although he seems to be carefree and going with the flow, he always seems to be topping you at everything. got a 99 on a quiz? would you look at that, rook got a 100. learning a new language? rook speaks french! auditioning for lead role? rook already got the spot!
even hearing his name makes you fume in the ears. rook hunt is overall well-liked, he probably isn’t even aware of your secret competition with him.
finally… finally!!! you look up at the cast of your school’s new upcoming play. you got the lead! and… rook got the second lead…
he’s playing romeo… in romeo and juliet… and you’re… juliet… oh!
you roll your fists. it’s fine. it’s fine. it’s fine. you’ll manage. you worked hard for this. you’ll manage.
first day of practice, rook prances in speaking french. romeo and juliet takes place in italy you idiot!
“bonjour, roi de la jalousie!”
you roll your eyes, showing your displeasure. “hello, rook.”
the first few playthroughs went as perfect as it could be. most of romeo and juliet is just romeo losing his mind over a 14 year old girl, so it wasn’t like you and him had to be intimate. yet.
“okay. in act 2, romeo and juliet kiss at the party. preferably, I’d prefer to re-enact a real kiss. but if you guys are uncomfortable, we could—”
“oh, non! I could not! to make a play so touching and real, it is important that we kiss! but if our dear roi de la jalouise is uncomfortable…”
not wanting to back down against rook you shake your head. “no, no! that’s fine! we can kiss!”
you left that day mortified. you didn’t even have your first kiss yet. what is wrong with you?!
the day came to rehearse the kiss. you chugged your bottle of water and marched on stage.
you said your lines carefully, avoiding eye contact with him. the rival you made up in your delusions, a little rook with devil horns and a tail, was somehow (in reality) much taller, prettier and kind of intimidating to look at now. you felt awfully shy.
as his face leaned against yours, he only looked at you gleefully once you finally made eye contact. both of your lips were close, but he didn’t kiss you. huh?
once it was break time, you sat down at the edge of the stage dumbfounded. everyone else left backstage for pizza, so it was just you in an echoey theatre.
that was until rook came in and sat beside you, holding two paper plates of pizza. he handed one to you.
“you don’t have to kiss me if you don’t want to.” rook said, smiling. he was unusually calm.
“n-no! I want to!” you replied too hastily. you truly didn’t seem to hate him at this moment. you only felt flustered.
“I know you are competitive. especially with me. even though your fierceness is truly beautiful, I do not advise you to do something you are not comfortable with.”
oh. you look at him. “you noticed? haha….” suddenly, all that competitive spirit you had felt childish.
“well of course! It’s what drew me to you. it’s especially why I auditioned for romeo, even though i was more interested in mercutio.”
you felt yourself turning red. he auditioned for romeo for you? just for you?
“well… i already told the director I’m okay with the kiss… it’s a little too embarrassing to take it back now.”
“well… perhaps if we practiced together, you’d feel more comfortable, mon amour?”
you laugh. “you keep calling me french names. what does this one mean?
rook gently kissed the space between your eyebrows. “my love.”
(ps: roi de la jalouise means king of jealousy!)
vil schoenheit [international star]
vil schoenheit is a celebrity. a big, all-time, internet sensation kind of celebrity.
a model, an actor, an influencer… he’s everything!
he’s gorgeous, lovely, not like those other celebrities who are horrible in real like and kind only on the internet.
you feel blessed to know that someone as famous as him is going to the same school as you.
vil is popular, undeniably so. everywhere you go, you see him greeting people of all kinds, receiving gifts and panicking after making a girl faint from his magnificence alone.
oddly though, he’s often by himself. like he has no friends. you tilt your head in confusion. someone like him must have hundreds of friends, right? maybe he considers the entire student body as his friends! does that mean you’re his friend too?
you pinched your cheeks. there’s no way someone like him would notice you! no matter how generous he is, you understood it’s difficult to get alone with everyone.
on one fateful morning, you ran into your classroom to grab your forgotten gym clothes when you pause right before opening the door, hearing frustrated mumbling.
“these stupid fans and their stupid demands”
you peered in through the door window and saw vil schoenheit retouching his makeup, frowning.
there was an awful churn in your stomach. for some reason, you felt like you shouldn’t enter the classroom. but between making it to phys ed in time and have a good first impression on a big-time celebrity, you chose to enter the classroom. it’s not a big deal anyway, it’s not like you and him even talk all that much.
you opened the door to see vil turn his head, almost like an owl as you quickly crab walked to your desk and grabbed your clothes before running off.
like expected, you didn’t see vil at all after that event. although he didn’t seem as lovely as you expected, it didn’t really turn your view of him upside down either. you’re weren’t a big fan of him anyway, so it wasn’t a big deal at all.
until one day, he cornered you.
“did you tell anyone?”
“tell what?”
“what you saw.”
you couldn’t help but laugh. “it was one slip up. it’s not a big deal.”
vil glared at you. obviously, you didn’t understand the severity of the situation. if he, vil, a high-end celebrity, screwed even the slightest, it would massively deter his career.
“okay, fine. but I don’t want you to tell anyone about this going forward. if you want an autograph or something, I’ll do it but—”
you shook your hands. “It’s fine. you don’t have to.”
vil raised his eyebrow. you don’t want anything from him? you’re not blackmailing him? everyone always wants something out of him. but he shouldn’t push things further.
he sighed. “alright. but give me your contact information. I’d rather keep track of you instead of worrying.”
your eyes glistened at the bright new vil schoenheit in your contacts.
it was just like that. you had an untouched number on your phone. having someone so famous like him giving his number seemed enough. since there was no other reason for you guys to talk, you guys barely interacted after that (although you’ve felt like a pair of eyes was watching you more often than not)
you didn't expect to run into vil again, so it was a surprise to see vil working in an empty classroom afterschool.
"stupid sports festival..." vil mumbled to himself before his eyes locked with yours.
his eyes were an enchanting colour. something tugged at your heart when you saw a close glimpse of his eyes. lavender. sharp, pristine eyes, long lashes... vil had a sort of maturity to him.
feeling yourself turning red, you blinked a few times before greeting him.
apparently, the ever-so-kindhearted vil has volunteered to work on the upcoming sports festival's banner. no one else wanted to spend their free time doing it, and vil freely told you that he felt pressured about his image because he wasn't saying anything. reluctantly he offered and now here he was.
your tilted your head. vil was just simply expressing what he truly felt about something to you. what happened to the hesitant, suspicious vil that you met all those months ago? does he trust you or something? but you guys barely even talk properly!
unfortunately for vil, you had offered to work on the banner weeks ago. however, only a few of the sports festival committee knew. the rest did not, including vil. (you weren't even aware vil was apart of it)
"well an extra hand couldn't be bad!" you say happily, clasping your hands. "would you consider your a creative person?"
a few weeks went by, planning, discussing ideas and purchasing materials. (you mostly go alone because you had to learn the hard way that vil gets recognized quite easily, even with a tight disguise)
soon, you and vil slowly started going home together. vil lives close by, saying it's better than riding some fancy car and attracting even more attention. your school's neighbourhood was quite rich so when you first passed his house, your jaw dropped. wow! it's so big!
eventually, the banner making, the sports festival planning and discussing came to an end. your impression of vil made you assume that both you and him would be going on your own paths.
"where are you going?" vil said, as you were already walking out the door.
"...home?"
"I thought we went together?"
maybe you were wrong!
everyone used to whisper about vil schoenheit. the kindhearted, friendly student at school. the mega-huge celebrity, the popular boy who always kept a distance with others.
now, everyone whispers about vil schoenheit, the kindhearted, friendly student at school. the mega-huge celebrity, the popular boy and his best friend, you. attached at the hip. are they dating?
you're surprised at vil's ability to keep you hidden from paparazzi. he was worried that rumours would rise, especially since he started inviting you over to his place. everytime pictures of him would surface the internet, you were never mentioned... luckily.
you sat down in front of him, eyes closed. vil has been getting loads of skincare PR as of late, and he's been trying the products on you, worried it would break him out. he had a shoot coming up soon.
"I haven't read my script yet and I have to leave the city in a week. could you believe the amount of procrastination I've been doing?" vil scoffs at himself.
"you didn't tell me you're leaving."
"don't worry. it's for only two weeks. I'd be back in a blink of an eye."
you huffed. "I'm gonna miss you, vil."
vil's ears flushed. but your eyes were shut closed.
"I'm gonna miss you too, I guess."
vil was wrong. after he left, time seemed to have gone slower. you were so used to spending so much of your time with him, you felt like you forgot how to hang out with other people.
you bought sweet treats with your friends, went to photobooths and stressed out about assignments and tests, but vil was at the back of your mind at all time.
"I'm coming to the airport tomorrow." vil said over the phone.
"I'll come and see you!"
"don't. too many people are gonna be there."
vil smiled at the other end of the call. he knew you'd do it anyway.
...and he was right! there you were, waiting in a crowd of a bunch of people. you were worried that he wouldn't see you.
it was fine. you knew how worked up he got about his personal and work life mixing. maybe it wasn't a good idea to see your best friend in a field of paparazzi.
well, it was too late. cameras started flashing and people started screaming a familiar name.
you tried to squeeze to the front of the crowd as best as you could, but to a point you had to stop and depend on your toes and only hope he could see you.
as a blonde boy with a mask on entered the scene, you saw him turn his head around, looking for something, until his eyes met yours.
you've always thought those eyes had a mature, elegant feel. but for some reason, this time, his eyes felt full and boyish, emotional.
you popped out from the back to see that vil has already found you, giving you a tight hug.
"vil! vil! there's paparazzi here!'
your face was squished against his chest, but you could still see and feel the pictures flashing.
"aren't you worried about, you know, those rumours surfacing?"
vil shook his head, smiling. "no, not really. not when I want them to be true."
idia shroud [gamers can actually look good?!]
you: HIII can u plz carry me in val im dying uwu
gloomurai: alright what the flip.
you: be my pocket sage kitten
gloomurai: ok fine wait for me
you stare at the chatroom between you and your online friend, gloomurai. you've been talking to the guy for a while now, and he seems to be overpowered in every game, carrying you in all your favourites nonstop. does this guy even have a life? you laugh, as you stretch your back.
it was winter break, and your house's heater was broken. while it was getting fixed, you've been spending your days in your favourite gaming cafe, in the warm heat of the pc and the warm computer screen.
you: bro im in this gaming cafe and this guy beside me wont stop mumbling i think im going insane
gloomurai: lmao im in a gaming cafe too
you: what??? rlly?? omg which one r u at
gloomurai: ignihyde cafe lols
you: WTF ME TOO???
gloomurai: HUH
you: WHICH SECTION R U IN
gloomurai: im in section 3A
you: OH MY GOD
gloomurai: what??
you: IM IN 4A
you slowly turn you head to the guy who was mumbling beside you the entire time, him doing the same. you peeked your eyes to his computer screen to have your chatroom open.
is that... your classmate... idia shroud????
you've heard about the guy. he's shy, gloomy (no pun intended) and quite repulsive to approach. of course, you've heard a number of girls talking about how hot and tall he is, how much they loveeeee loser boys.
but his attractiveness was not what caught your attention. your online friend for over a year was your CLASSMATE??? a guy you barely even talked to??? hello?? is anybody hearing this???
you suddenly felt silly for calling him your pocket sage.
that night, your phone was open to his chatroom. idia immediately stood up and left the moment you guys met eyes, so you didn't get a chance to talk to him properly.
he clearly had the green online status on his profile, but he wasn't messaging you at all like he usually was. I mean, he's someone you apparently know in real life, so there's no harm in striking up a conversation, right?
you: soooooo
you: who knew that we knew each other irl? lol
you: i mean we dont rlly talk in school so um this is kinda awkward lmfao
you: we can stop being friends online if u want
you: but i won't have anyone to carry me in league :(
you sat the tiny seen beside your message. for the next five minutes, you say idia typing and then not typing. like he was going back and forth. you just waited patiently.
gloomurai: no i still wanna be friends w u
you: u sure? i mean u kinda js dipped lolsies
gloomurai: yeah i know n im sorry i kinda panicked omfg
gloomurai: i never thought you'd be into videos and stuff thats kinda cool
you: huh?? you didn't think that?? have you not seen my anime keychains and video game characters on my phone wallpaper??
gloomurai: no i did but i thought u didnt know what they were....
you laughed, and spent the rest of the night texting him.
your heater was fixed at that point, and had no reason to go back to the gaming cafe (your mom reprimanded you for spending your entire break playing video games) so you didn't see idia until the start of the new semester.
he was still always that shy kid you knew at school, so you approached him first.
"hey idia!"
he looked up from the video game on his phone, eyes widening at the sight of you.
"u-uhm... hi."
"so! how was your winter break?"
you sat beside him, making yourself comfortable. idia tensed up but he seemed okay with it.
"I mostly played video games... like usual."
"haha, I've always thought how weird it was that you were overpowered in so many games! I mean, I've been playing just league for a solid while now and you're just so much stronger than me! in other games too! how do you put so much time into videos games?"
you've seen idia's name often at the top of exam grades when they were posted, you thought all he did was study. now your impression of him changed.
as time went on, idia seemed to have calmed down around you. he wasn't as shy anymore and started talking to you normally like how he'd be online.
when you and him were just internet friends, he refused to voice call. now, he would call and play games with you after school.
he started tailing you everywhere at school, so you even introduced him to your friends and told the funny story of how you and him first met on a game. idia seemed to get along with them as well (you've managed to garner a small group of game nerds, idia fit in smoothly)
idia was indeed tall, despite his posture (imagine how tall he would be if his back was straight) and had bright blue hair, like fire. he often reminded you of a dating game love interest, the loser, gamer boyfriends in video games. when you told him, his cheeks flushed so red that you swore even the colour of his hair changed too.
he was also handsome too, you concluded. you already knew this, but having a closer look at your face really did make you confirm it. the family genetics seemed to be going strong because when you came over to his place one time, you met his younger brother ortho, and was just as cute and pretty and handsome! (you kinda wanted to adopt him what the freak!)
for his birthday, you gifted him a pair of cute kitty hair pins. you knew he liked cats, and you also thought his hair covered his pretty face too much. you thought maybe it was too cutesy for someone like him, but surprisingly, he wore it no problem! whenever you two sunk into the couch to play games, idia would pin his bangs back to focus. hair strands fell to the front of his forehead and you often wanted to push them back and kiss it... WHAT! what are you thinking!!! he doesn't like you that way, wake up and stop being delusional!!!
your feelings for him seemed to be so one sided. he's talk comfortably and casually with you, like a best friend. someone he totally wouldn't have a crush on. you've been trying to get over it (they're only brief feelings, you swear!) but everytime your skin even slightly grazes over his you started to sweat.
maybe you should just confess.
one hot summer night, you're seated beside idia on the floor, shooting down a bunch of zombies. this has been both of your guy's 17th try.
finally... yay!!! you guys managed to complete the round and you cheer in celebration.
"oh my god!! finally!!! idia you are so awesome!"
"I know." he smirks. "what would you do without me?"
you have no idea. you think.
maybe it was the heatwaves. maybe it was the whirring fan only hitting one spot on your back, not cooling you at all. maybe it was because of chewed up popsicle stick sitting in your mouth. but you felt brave.
"I like you." you say.
Idia's smile falls. he turns to look at you.
"I mean- uhm- I- uhm-" oh god. you wanted to hide in a hole right now.
the game's loading screen was playing funky music. you were sweating, from the heat or the confession? who knows.
"what would I do without you? nothing, idia. nothing. I think about you all the time. even slightly grazing shoulders make me panic. I really, truly do like you."
before he can even reply, you continue.
"and.. you treat me like a brother! your best friend! yes, we are friends, but can you treat a person like me with some interest?? I've liked you for months, idia. how did you not get a single hint?!"
you breathe in. and breathe out.
"so. I want you to make a decision. right here, right now. do you like me back? or have I been pining over nothing?"
you stare at him. his eyes are wide, confused, like a cat. you found it so, so cute. you wanted to kiss those eyes, his cheeks so red and flushed from the summer heat, you wanted to kiss his forhead, his jaw, his lips.
your faces were close. you often forget how close in proximity idia likes to be around you.
idia seemed to struggle to make eye contact with you. he looked to the side, then the other side, and then looked down.
"I'm not the only stupid one here, you know."
huh? you blink.
"I also...thought...this was...one sided..." idia's voice egst smaller and smaller. you have to frown to hear him.
"did you not realize why I stay so close behind you? because...uhm..." idia hesitates. "because... I like... you... too. but you were so free... and awesome and cool like that or whatever... and I thought there would be no way you'd look in my.... direction like that."
your heart thumps. the game's music seemed to blur out. the fan was whirring quietly, the grasshoppers buzz outside the open window.
you heard idia's breathing, you saw his eyes spilling the colour of amber. you licked your lips.
the light of the game screen was blocked from your sight as you closed your eyes and felt idia's warmth near your face.
lilia vanrouge [delusional chef]
cooking was something that was special in your heart. it was safe to say that you were utterly disappointed that no one was interested in your cooking club.
the only members were you and your senior, lilia vanrouge.
soon, however, you came to realize why no one wanted to join your club. lilia's cooking was a hideous!
apparently, he was infamous for bringing in the nastiest stench of a lunch to school. for some reason, you were the only person who didn't know! after finding out that lilia joined the cooking club, no one else wanted to join.
you sighed. you needed at least 4 members to be officially registered as a school club.
with lilia's help, both you and him went around promoting and encouraging your club, as well as spending your days cooking.
most of the time, it was just you trying to prevent lilia from doing something ridiculous. there should have been no reason for you to try to convince lilia to not put three pounds of sugar in stew.
salty food tastes sweet, sweet food tastes salty, food in general started to taste gross...
you were exhausted. but for some reason, having the time of your life!
lilia vanrouge was a year older than you, so there was no reason for you to really talk to him. but every time you saw him in the hallways, you always thought he looked so cool with his dark hair striped with vibrant pink and his cute and mischievous vibe! you were glad to be able to finally get to know him, even though he is graduating this year.
you were close to giving up. you were almost at the month mark and no one wanted to join. lilia patted your pack gently as you sniffed.
"it's okay... the school year is ending soon anyway. you can always try next year! obviously I won't be here to help you, but you could still give it a shot."
you smiled at him. of course it was gonna work next year, by that time, lilia would've long gone off and people would actually be interested. it be your senior year next year last well, so you knew you'll have to give it another shot.
so when the end of the month approach, you heartily accepted your denied club application. it was fine! you'll try next year!
it wasn't like home ec. didn't exist. there, you'd cook and have fun.
you kind of missed lilia and hanging out with him, so you started approaching him with new dishes you've made.
"oh! how lovely! it seems that your skills have approved ever since I helped you with cooking! my, my, I must be a chef master of sorts..."
you were nailed in the heart because of the ego hit, but you laughed nonetheless. you thought lilia was silly, fun and interesting. hanging out with him was never boring, and if there was an excuse to hang out with him again, you totally took it.
once you started bringing your dishes, lilia started bringing his own to you. it's like he wanted you dead. they tasted awful. but one bite after another, you smiled meekly as you forced yourself to eat. "it's delicious!" you'd say enthusiastically, as if you didn't just risk burning your stomach out.
lilia would smile, pleased. "wonderful, wonderful!" he'd always say, clasping his hands together.
you would always make extra food when you cooked. lilia was always in your mind when in the kitchen.
so when the last day of school slowly approached, you baked a bunch of cookies to give out to some of your senior friends, lilia included (don't tell anyone-- but lilia's bag had the most and best batch of cookies)
you sheepishly gave it to lilia on the last day. your dear lilia-senpai was graduating, someone who brought a little excitement to your life.
"thank you so much for taking care of me this year. I hope you have a good life outside of highschool!"
when lilia saw your gift, he started to laugh. "what a coincidence! I made some for you too."
he took out a bag of chocolates, storebought.
"I know you don't like my food all that much, so I decided I'd buy food instead. thanks for dealing with my cooking all year, haha."
you took a bite out of your chocolate. it melted in your mouth and the sweetness exploded. you hoped your cookies would taste just as good.
suddenly, lilia stretched out his hand and gently placed his thumb on the corner of your lips.
"you got something there" he said, as he wiped a chocolate mark. without breaking eye contact, he licked it off his own thumb.
"have a great summer."
malleus draconia [shielded rich kid]
unrequited love is so embarrassing. especially if that other person doesn't even know you.
you've been head over heels for malleus draconis for 3 months. all you think about is him. all you want to see is him. but he doesn't even know you.
it was one fateful day, when he picked up your dropped pencil case for you, when you saw his soft smile and emerald eyes. his porcelain skin and his long, elegant nails. you decided from that day on, you were madly in love with him.
so, you've done what any normal person would do and deep dived everything you could find about him
malleus draconia, 3rd year, son of a successful entrepreneur, under draconia co. he likes reading, gargoyles and ice cream, he's good at instruments like the cello and violin... he's been seen exploring ruins... you're not a creep! you swear!
you have this vision in your head where malleus is a prince charming who saves you from the evil villain who wants to sell you for money.
one day, when you were going to school on a crisp morning, someone sat beside you, waiting for the bus.
the guy was unusually tall, so you turned to see malleus draconia standing before you.
"oh hello! I remember you, are you heading to school as well?"
panicked, flustered and nervous, you frantically nodded.
"I've decided I wanted to take the bus today, but I'm sure how I want to approach it. could you help me? ^_^"
"uhm.. o-okay!"
nearly shaking, you sat beside malleus on the way to school.
why was he even taking the bus anyway? wasn't he like, filthy rich?
you friends congratulated you on finally talking to the guy you like when you arrived. you laughed and said that's probably the only time you'll ever talk to him.
however, the next day, malleus was beside you once again.
"good morning!"
you only mustered to say a hello.
"I really enjoyed the bus ride yesterday. Do you also take the bus. to go home?"
you nodded.
"well, I was wondering if you and I could go home on the bus after school? I have some to understand you have to go to a different station to go back? I tried to find it yesterday, but it was just too difficult."
you nodded, again. you could not seem to talk, nervous.
that day, your friends pushed up towards him and left you alone, saying you finally have a shot of getting to know him.
this became a pattern.
every morning you'd take the bus with him to school. once it ended, you and malleus took the bus home together. you weren't sure exactly where he lived, but it was enough to know that he probably lived close by. probably the wealthy neighbourhood you've passed by multiple times.
in your mind, malleus. is perfect, elegant and charming.
in reality, malleus is a sheltered, clumsy and curious boy who really liked taking the bus to and from school.
you started to relax near him too. obviously, you're still nervous and shy, but knowing that malleus isn't a higher being like you made up in your mind, and just a rich kid who has hobbies and interests like any other, you felt a little calmer each day.
"have you done anything other than take the bus?" you asked.
"no, except going on business class on flights."
you laughed. "I was thinking..." you breathed in. "sotheresthisbakerythatopenedandIwaswonderingifyouwantedtogo" you spit out in one breathe.
malleus, like the impressive guy he is, caught everything you said. "well of course! I've been to many in europe, but I've never tasted any pastries here. I usually get them shipped. I'm quite curious!"
entering the bakery, malleus' eyes glimmered like a child.
he said that his family usually chose what he ate, so he really never got a choice. you saw him struggle to pick what he wanted and you offered some suggestions and even paid for it (malleus accidentally gave two hundred dollars for a two dollar bread, he has no concept of money)
seeing malleus act like this, your feelings for him shattered. no, not entirely. just the feelings you had for the cool, distinguished malleus you had in your head. the side of malleus he only showed to the public. instead, you fell in love with the boyish, cute and confused malleus you were seeing now. the side of malleus that he deemed you were worthy enough to see.
this year, it hadn't rained much. so you knew that if it rains, it's gonna pour, hard.
so, after school, you and malleus stood, umbrella-less in a rainstorm. buses were cancelled due to trees fallings.
"well, I could call my driver. if you tell me your address, I can definitely drop you..." malleus stopping talking as he saw you run into the rain. you didn't hear him.
"come on! I know a shortcut! if we run fast enough, we can make it back."
malleus has never met someone so free like you before.
running towards you, you grabbed his hand and pulled him forward through an unknown side of the road.
although the rainstorm was cold and wet, it felt cozy and warm now that his hand was holding onto you. malleus truly thought you were a breath of fresh air.
you started to laugh at yourself. how ridiculous. malleus, a higher class, local rich kid, was following you, someone from a lower class than him, someone not worthy of him. halfway there you realize he could've just call his driver to pick him up. you felt so silly.
"I'm sorry to drag you into the mess" you yelled amongst the splashes of the rain hitting the ground.
when malleus saw you smile and laughing as you apologized for something so silly, he suddenly could imagine an entire future with you and him together.
#twst fic#twst x reader#twst#twst wonderland#disney twst#twisted wonderland#heartslabyul#heartslaybul x reader#trey clover#trey clover x reader#cater diamond#cater diamond x reader#leona kingscholar#leona kingsholar x reader#rook hunt#rook hunt x reader#pomefiore#savanaclaw#vil schoenheit#vil shoenheit x reader#diasomnia#lilia vanrouge#lilia vanrouge x reader#malleus draconia#malleus draconia x reader#x reader
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So I read Batman #416 last night...
They haven’t talked in a year and a half according to this issue. Bruce literally did not attempt to talk to Dick once after “firing” him in this version of the continuity? Phones go two way, Bruce, especially if you’re supposed to be the parent/adult in this situation.
And Dick looks so sad. Like for all people like to talk about JT being “replaced”, I don’t know that I would have it in me to get over it if my father figure knew I was alive and well after he basically cut me off, didn’t bother to speak to me for 18 months or attempt any kind of communication, and I had to go find him when all of a sudden he gave the job I was fired from, that had defined our relationship, to a teenager, who was even more at risk than I had been.
“It was Alfred who forced money on me so I’d have something to live on. You couldn’t even be bothered to say goodbye.”
“ I was involved with a case. I didn’t…”
This is so much sadder than the original New Teen Titans/pre-Crisis on Infinite Earths version??? Like this is so fucking sad.
Then instead of leaving school on his own, Dick fails out because he’s too distracted and is asked not to come back? Like eventually he has the Titans, but taking away this being his choice and making it something he experienced because Bruce felt guilty he was shot makes it so much worse.
And then this set of panels…
“ It didn’t matter to you that I didn’t have any life other than the one we shared .”
Ymmv on whether Dick leading on his own terms or because he was fired as a change for the better or the worse, but holy God, does it change the dynamics of this relationship.
The way Dick reaches out for him… and Bruce shuts him out and tells him to leave. Just like he will after Jason actually dies, except this time, he only punched the glass and not Dick. Dick is trying to be the first one to reconcile, but Bruce won’t let him. Calling him Nightwing instead of by his name as a form of distancing him and everything.
And yet, for all the five trillion posts and fics I’ve seen about how Dick supposedly treated Jason badly due to jealousy and felt bad after he died, his next move? Is to go help Jason, give him his approval, and then offered to talk to him when Bruce wouldn’t and things were difficult.
TBH, I'm pretty sure that Dick Grayson is a way better fucking person than me. Because I like to think I wouldn't have taken it out on Jason directly, but I also would not have gone to find him, reassure him/give him my approval, and offer him a support network in the immediate aftermath of that conversation either. I would not have had it in me after ... *points to all of Bruce's bullshit*
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I wanted to make a last-minute prediction post based on what I’ve seen so far. I haven’t looked at new Dragon Age news for the past couple (3? 4?) weeks, and I know I’m (on purpose to avoid spoilers) missing some (probably a lot of) details that other people already know. I DON’T WANT TO KNOW. So if I’m already right or wrong about something,
PLEASE please DON’T TELL ME.
You can come back in a month and tell me THEN. It’s just one more month to wait.
Also, this is just for fun, and it’s not serious. It’s based on vibes and also based on what I would write myself. I have developed a surprisingly specific image of what might happen to Solas and I’m just want to write it down.
I’m thinking “there is no possible way this is right………” but then I’m like “unless…..?” so a vague chance of potential spoilers
First, I’ve been suspicious about the elven gods getting free and Solas being trapped. If you think about what Solas says in Trespasser, it’s very
Part of Solas’ aim that has so far been revealed to us is he likely wants the Veil torn down, and one of the only things that is keeping him from that is the reality of the elven gods trapped in there, who would be released.
Inquisitor: “If you destroyed the Veil, wouldn’t the false gods be freed?”
Solas: “I had plans.”
But that is no longer a concern from that moment in the gameplay trailer where they are released.
“I intend to restore them. Doing so will most likely destroy your world.”
Two elven gods rampaging across Thedas sounds like the kind of “the world is being destroyed” situation Solas was talking about. It is his incision that breached their prison, and it isn’t impossible that Rook may have been almost manipulated into completing it. I wonder if Solas is playing his two sets of enemies against each other yet again?
In the old tales, Solas uses his enemies to fight each other while he is tied to a tree, trapped. He gives both sides equal advice until they are both defeated, at which point he frees himself and finishes what he set out to do.
Honestly, even though he’s “trapped,” it sounds exactly like the sort of thing that needs to happen for his work to continue.
(All of this is speculation that I think I’ll have a better idea about once I hear the full first conversation with him, and exactly how he words his point of view of what happened. If he’s very squirrelly in his wording, I’ll know he may have caused it on purpose.)
“I seek regeneration,” he said in Vows & Vengeance. The devs had said that Solas has been bringing back magic for centuries before the series even started. Perhaps it explains why the dragons have returned. It seems that his reshaping the world, regenerating it, will be successful because it seems to be moving steadily without him. So maybe this is a last and, once in motion, inevitable step in “healing” the injured world.
I think that the elven gods are very scary and world-ending, but Solas is the only one of them that reshaped the world successfully. He will be the one to do it again, not Ghilan’nain or Elgar’nan or any other god. He is a trickster his, and Tricksters are the Gods of Inevitable (otherwise catastrophic) Change.
One of the greatest criticisms of Inquisition was the lack of screen time Corypheus had. And how the climax fell flat at the end because he didn’t have enough screen time. This leads me to believe that Solas may be the “Last Boss” of DA4. Because we definitely HAVE a complicated satisfying personal relationship with him that has been set up for two whole games.
So the ending for Solas needs to do a lot of things:
“These are the times in which legends are born or slain” Solas as the Dread Wolf will die
It needs to work for both people who love and hate Solas
In order to defeat the Elven Gods, Rook has to find their weakness, which is Solas’ weakness too (maybe a fatal flaw, or how they can be truly killed) so it can be used on Solas too. Perhaps this will involve Solas trying to obscure this from Rook as best as he can
Solas fully is on Rook’s side against the evanuris, but when they’re taken care of, he doesn’t need to team up anymore
I don’t believe that you will be able to stop Solas’ plans, and I hope that they will change Thgedas’ world no matter what. I hope it’s just a fact of life that the Veil comes down
The story basically needs to involve Solas betraying Rook again, because new players need to experience that feeling in order to be in the same place with him as they were in DA3
It needs to give players a torn situation about him, one that makes you feel he’s reasonable but at the same time make it satisfying to fight him. So I believe this is why he will betray the player again, even if he is getting along with them.
I believe there needs to be a boss fight against Solas because he does have a cool big monster form and people have been promised to be able to kill him
It needs to be satisfying for those who romanced him too, but it also needs to be beautifully sad because part of the draw of the romance compared to all the others in the series is that it’s beautifully sad
For that reason, I suspect (not because I particularly want this to happen, I’m just saying what I see most likely) is that fighting and killing Solas may not actually be optional, and he is killed in every worldstate. This way, everyone gets a last boss fight and everyone experiences pretty much the same story without much branching
I think the difference between friendly and unfriendly version may be whether he is brought back to life by the efforts of those who care about him after he is killed
So basically:
Veil comes down/magic comes back
Solas helps Rook take down evanuris
Solas betrays Rook when it seems the story should be over
Boss fight with Solas as the Dread Wolf (see: my Tulpa Theory)
Solas is defeated and killed
Story ends there if Solas is hated, (story about Rook getting revenge)
If Solas is loved, Solas is brought back and rebirthed in another freer form through a spirit ritual, perhaps as Wisdom, but some part of it is bittersweet like Rose and Doctor 10 (story about regret).
But basically, no matter how Solas and Lavellan’s story ends, their love enduring will be the path to joy, or them being together. Rook can kill Solas and Lavellan can bring him back. Even if it has to just happen off-screen or in fanfic.
I think it is very likely that Solas kills Varric or another character as a way to transition from passive threat to active threat. Or maybe Rook is responsible because of the theme of regret, idk. But I think we’ll get a great cathartic end for Varric probably.
I think we may have to choose between Varric and the Inquisitor, because it’s similar to the Hawke-Alistair choice
I would be very surprised if the story ended with Solas and Lavellan went off into the sunset together in a perfectly happy ending with nothing bittersweet. But sadly, I don’t really see this happening and I think bittersweet may be the name of the game.
Other things I predict:
We can assume that the Inquisitor will have an optional death scenario when they reappear, where we choose either to let them sacrifice themselves in some way, or save them. So perhaps there is an ending where Solas and Lavellan die together and can be free as spirits, which would also be bittersweet.
I don’t really have predictions for anything but Solas, so the big lore reveals might change the situation so much that none of this applies or makes sense anymore. In which case I will probably be HAVING FUN.
I am not EXPECTING any of this to happen, I am just writing it down and posting it in case I’m right. Anyway please wait until I’m done playing to tell me if I’m right or wrong, and this is just for fun, I wouldn’t mind if the whole game was completely different.
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Reacting Answering and debunking Kristine s take on shifting (girl who talked about genetics and shifting)
Let’s clear the air, babes. 💅✨"
So, I know some of y’all might have stumbled across that TikTok from @sectumsempress (Christine), and if you haven’t yet, let me sum it up: it’s a video where she dives into her takes on shifting—some thought-provoking, some solid, and others… well, let’s just say they need a little rethinking.
Now, before anyone panics or starts spiraling, let me reassure you: you’re not doing anything wrong. Shifting is a personal journey, and one person’s opinions (even if they’re loud and sassy) don’t define the truth. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by her claims, breathe, because I’ve got you.
I’m here to break down her points one by one: where she’s spot on, where she’s almost there, and where she’s just plain off the mark. This isn’t about dragging anyone—it’s about keeping the shifting community informed, confident, and empowered.
Remember, babe: shifting is real, it’s valid, and you are more than capable of mastering it. Let’s dive into this post with clarity, sass, and a sprinkle of tough love. We’re addressing it all, and we’re doing it together. 💖✨
Taglist :
1: "I don't know what it is, but I do think there is a genetic component to who can and cannot shift."
Oh, honey. Let me stop you right there. Reality shifting is about consciousness, not chromosomes. No one’s out here unlocking DRs with their DNA. If shifting were genetic, then wouldn’t identical twins always have the same shifting abilities? Newsflash: they don’t. Shifting is deeply personal—it’s shaped by belief systems, practice, and the state of your subconscious mind.
Let’s talk logic:
If shifting were genetic, why do people from all backgrounds, ages, and cultures shift successfully?
If genes dictated shifting ability, how do beginners with no spiritual training manage to shift while seasoned practitioners struggle sometimes?
This "genetic component" claim feels like an excuse to gatekeep shifting behind a veil of exclusivity. You don’t need elite DNA—you need clarity, discipline, and faith in your abilities. What you’re really saying here is “I’m struggling and need something to blame.” Blame your approach, babe, not your ancestors. Shifting doesn’t care about your family tree; it cares about your mindset. 🧬✨
2: "Out of everyone who can shift, most of them shouldn't, including myself when I first started."
Now this is projection if I’ve ever seen it. Just because you weren’t ready when you started doesn’t mean the rest of the community isn’t. People shift for their own reasons, whether it’s healing, exploration, fun, or growth. Who are you to decide who should and shouldn’t explore their consciousness?
Let’s unpack this:
Shifting is a skill, and like any skill, it comes with a learning curve. Mistakes and missteps are part of the process. No one is perfect at it from the jump, but that doesn’t mean they shouldn’t try.
This idea of “most people shouldn’t shift” reeks of elitism. What’s the criteria? Who makes the rules? Oh wait—you don’t, because this is an individual journey.
And let’s not ignore the thinly veiled guilt here. “Including myself when I first started” screams “I made mistakes, so no one else should try.” No, sis, you made mistakes so others can learn and grow. Let people figure it out for themselves—your experience isn’t universal. Stay humble. 💁♀️✨
3: "If shifting is affecting your current reality to the point where your mental health plummets and you can't function, the cost is too high. This is also at past me."
Okay, valid point. For once, we’re aligned—but let’s add nuance. Shifting itself isn’t the villain here. The problem arises when someone uses shifting as an escape or obsesses over their DR to the detriment of their CR.
Here’s the truth:
Shifting works best when you’re grounded in your CR. Neglecting your CR responsibilities, ignoring self-care, or avoiding real-life problems will inevitably lead to burnout. Your CR self is the foundation for all your realities. If you’re not taking care of yourself here, it’s going to show up in your DR too.
Balance is key. Shifting can be an incredible tool for healing and self-discovery, but it’s not a replacement for addressing your mental health or real-life challenges.
Let’s also call out this “past me” comment. You’re shading yourself for your mistakes, which is fair, but don’t let that self-criticism turn into fear-mongering for others. Instead of saying “the cost is too high,” try saying, “Learn from my mistakes and prioritize your well-being.” That’s the energy we need. 🧠✨
4: "I think there will come a time when shifting is able to be explained scientifically."
Now we’re getting somewhere. Yes, science may eventually catch up, but let’s not act like shifting is waiting for permission to exist. Just because something isn’t fully understood doesn’t mean it’s invalid. Dreams weren’t “real” until REM sleep was discovered. Electricity wasn’t harnessed until the right tools were developed. Shifting is the same—it’s ahead of its time.
Here’s the tea:
Quantum physics already hints at the nature of reality being far more fluid and observer-dependent than we once thought. Concepts like the observer effect and parallel universes align with what shifters describe.
Neurology is just scratching the surface of how visualization and intention shape the brain. Lucid dreaming, meditation, and neuroplasticity all prove that the mind is capable of extraordinary things.
The fact that shifting isn’t yet measurable doesn’t diminish its validity. Science is a tool, not a dictator of truth. Shifting is real now, and science will catch up later. Don’t let the lack of a peer-reviewed study make you doubt your own experiences. 🔬✨
5: "The majority of people on Shiftok in 2020 were lying."
You’re not wrong, but let’s dig deeper. Were there liars? Absolutely. TikTok’s algorithm rewards drama, and fake success stories grabbed attention. But dismissing the entire Shiftok community as liars is lazy and reductive.
Here’s what really happened:
Many people on Shiftok were genuine shifters sharing their tips and experiences. The problem was that TikTok favored sensationalism over authenticity. Real advice got buried under Hogwarts weddings and Draco stans claiming they had seven kids in one night. 🐍✨
The fake stories weren’t malicious—they were clout-chasing. People wanted likes, and exaggerating their experiences worked.
But let’s not let the liars overshadow the genuine shifters who were out there putting in the work. Misinformation thrived because of the platform, not because everyone was lying. Don’t throw out the whole community just because some people were playing the algorithm. 🌟✨
6: "Way more people outside of the internet shift than we think they do, and most of them are adults."
This one is surprisingly solid, but let’s add some layers. Shifting has been around forever—it’s not a TikTok invention. People have been exploring alternate realities under different names, like astral projection, lucid dreaming, and deep meditation, for centuries. These practices have roots in spiritual traditions across cultures, often led by—you guessed it—adults.
Why don’t we hear more about these adults?
They’re less likely to post about it online because they don’t care about clout or “DR trends.”
Many adults see shifting as a private, sacred practice rather than something to flex.
But here’s where the take falters: don’t dismiss teens and younger people just because they’re more visible online. Shifting transcends age. The internet didn’t create shifting; it just gave teens a platform to talk about it. And let’s not act like adults are automatically better at it—age doesn’t guarantee discipline or skill, hun. Stop pitting age groups against each other. Shifting is for everyone, whether you’re 15 or 50. 🌌✨
7: "Nine out of ten times, teenagers do not have the emotional maturity or mental capacity to handle a DR. I know I sure wouldn't have been able to."
Okay, this one SCREAMS projection. Just because you weren’t ready doesn’t mean an entire generation of teenagers isn’t. Emotional maturity isn’t an age—it’s a mindset. While it’s true that some teens might struggle with the responsibilities or intensity of a DR, plenty of them are capable of handling it.
Here’s what you’re missing:
Shifting is deeply personal. One teen’s DR might be about living in Hogwarts, while another’s might be about exploring their self-worth or healing trauma. What they can handle depends on their intent and preparation—not their birth year.
This take also assumes that adults magically have their lives together. Let’s be real—plenty of adults couldn’t handle a DR either. Emotional maturity is learned through experience, not something that just arrives with age.
Instead of writing off teenagers as too immature, why not empower them to approach shifting responsibly? Help them understand the importance of grounding techniques, journaling, and balancing their CR. Support them instead of gatekeeping, babe. Growth comes from guidance, not judgment. 🖤✨
8: "Shifting to live as a child when you are an adult is wrong."
Oh, let’s unpack this nonsense, because the judgment here is LOUD and unnecessary. Shifting to live as a child isn’t inherently “wrong”—it’s all about intent. People shift to younger ages for all kinds of valid reasons:
Healing: Someone who had a traumatic childhood might shift to experience the innocence and joy they missed out on. That’s not “wrong”—it’s deeply therapeutic.
Nostalgia: Revisiting a simpler time in life can be comforting and grounding.
Where’s the harm if someone is revisiting their childhood for healing or self-discovery? The only time this could be “wrong” is if someone’s doing it for malicious, fetishistic, or exploitative reasons. And let’s be clear—that’s an issue with the person’s intent, not the act of shifting itself.
This take reeks of moral grandstanding. If you don’t understand why someone might shift to a younger age, maybe try asking instead of judging. People’s reasons for shifting are complex and personal. Stay in your lane and let them live. 🍼✨
9: "Shifting to live as an adult when you are a child is wrong."
And here comes the hypocrisy. Why is shifting to an adult age suddenly a problem? If a teenager shifts to experience independence, maturity, or even just to see what adulthood is like, how is that “wrong”?
Let’s break it down:
Exploring independence: Teens often feel powerless in their CR lives. Shifting to adulthood can give them a sense of control or help them explore who they want to be.
Learning experiences: Shifting to an adult DR doesn’t mean teens are out here taking real-world risks. It’s an internal journey. They’re not suddenly going to have access to bank accounts or responsibilities in their CR.
The issue isn’t teens shifting to adult ages—it’s how they approach adult themes. If a teen shifts irresponsibly or romanticizes harmful aspects of adulthood, that’s a learning opportunity, not a reason to gatekeep. Let them explore and grow. The real world isn’t handing out “mature enough” badges; why should shifting? 🔑✨
10: "Shifting is a perception of reality that takes place inside your own mind, and this does not make it any less real."
Babe, what even IS this take? Calling shifting “a perception of reality inside your own mind” is the laziest oversimplification. It’s like saying the ocean is just “wet stuff” or the universe is just “space.” Shifting is SO much more than a mental exercise.
Here’s why this is bullshit:
Shifters report full sensory immersion in their DRs—smells, tastes, and even physical sensations. That’s not just perception; that’s a relocation of awareness.
Many shifters describe gaining knowledge or skills in their DRs that they couldn’t have fabricated in their CR minds. That’s evidence of connection to a separate reality, not just “perception.”
Saying it’s all in your head is reductive and dismissive. Shifting isn’t just a daydream or lucid dream—it’s a deliberate movement of consciousness.
By this logic, everything you experience is just “perception,” and therefore not real. Do better. Shifting is as real as the CR you’re reading this in—it’s just on a different frequency. 🌀✨
11: "Therefore, perma shifting is impossible."
Who told you this? Perma shifting isn’t just possible—it’s the logical extension of what shifting already is. If infinite realities exist and your consciousness can relocate temporarily, what exactly is stopping it from staying permanently?
Let’s debunk this thoroughly:
Shifting doesn’t require you to return to your CR. You’re not tethered here by some metaphysical leash. If you can spend weeks in a DR, why not forever?
This take assumes that your CR body is what keeps you “alive.” Wrong. Your consciousness is the seat of your existence, not the meat suit you’re wearing in your CR.
The only barrier to perma shifting is fear or lack of belief. People who say it’s impossible are projecting their own limitations. If shifting is real, so is perma shifting. Stop trying to box people into your doubts. Perma shifters are already out there living their best DR lives while you’re here arguing with yourself. 🖤✨
12: "Your body will not get up and do things while you're shifting."
Okay, I’ll give credit where it’s due—this one is spot on. Your CR body doesn’t suddenly start sleepwalking or doing the cha-cha while you’re in your DR. Shifting doesn’t override your physical body’s autopilot mode. Instead, your CR body stays in a deep state of rest, like sleeping or meditating.
Here’s why this is accurate:
Shifting is a relocation of consciousness, not physical movement. Your awareness moves to your DR, while your CR body stays put. It’s like putting your computer on sleep mode—it’s still there, just inactive.
If your CR body did start moving, you’d be blending realities, which isn’t how shifting works. Shifting creates a clear boundary between where your consciousness is and where your body remains.
That said, your CR body can react slightly to your DR state—like twitching or deepened breathing—but it’s not going to hop up and do laundry. So yes, you’re right, but don’t act like this is revolutionary knowledge. Most people know this already. Your body stays put while your mind does the exploring. 🛏️✨
13: "Most people treat scripting and shifting as a choose-your-own-path fanfic instead of reality."
This one’s got layers, and I’m ready to dig in. First of all, who cares if someone treats scripting like fanfic? Scripting is a personal tool, and people can approach it however they like. But let’s get real: scripting is way more than fanfiction.
Here’s the nuance:
Scripting is a powerful manifestation tool. It sets clear intentions for what you want to experience in your DR. Treating it like a story doesn’t make it any less valid. If imagining yourself as the protagonist in a beautifully detailed “fanfic” helps you focus, then it’s working, period.
Not everyone scripts for the same reasons. Some people use it to map out specific DR details, while others treat it as a loose guide. Neither approach is wrong—it’s about what works for YOU.
Also, let’s not act like scripting takes away from the “reality” of shifting. Scripting isn’t fake—it’s preparation. The moment you shift, what you scripted becomes as real as your CR. So stop invalidating people’s methods just because you don’t like the format. 💁♀️✨
14: "Putting your DR on a pedestal makes it harder to get to."
Okay, now we’re talking sense. This take is 100% accurate, and it’s a trap that a lot of shifters fall into. When you treat your DR like it’s some magical, unattainable place, you create mental resistance that makes shifting harder.
Here’s why this is true:
Your subconscious mind follows your beliefs. If you see your DR as something distant or godlike, your subconscious will act accordingly. It’ll say, “Oh, we’re not worthy yet? Cool, let’s not shift.”
When you overhype your DR, you’re also adding unnecessary pressure. Shifting becomes less about the journey and more about the desperation to “make it happen.” That desperation creates doubt, which blocks your progress.
The trick? Normalize your DR. Think of it as a natural extension of your existence, not some impossible dream. It’s real, attainable, and waiting for you—you just have to stop psyching yourself out. DRs are exciting, but they’re not fairy tales. Treat them as real, and your subconscious will follow suit. ✨
15: "I'm really excited about going to my DR in the same way that I'm really excited about going to a theme park or to a museum. Something very exciting but also very real and attainable."
Another solid take—this is exactly the right mindset. Approaching your DR with excitement, but without putting it on a pedestal, is the sweet spot for successful shifting. It’s the energy of anticipation, not desperation, that aligns your mind with your destination.
Here’s why this works:
Excitement fuels intention. When you’re genuinely excited about shifting, your subconscious is more likely to cooperate because it associates your DR with positive emotions.
Seeing your DR as “real and attainable” grounds your belief system. If you treat it like a natural part of your reality, your mind will perceive it as such.
This take is also a great reminder that shifting is a journey, not a chore. Approach it with the same joy you’d have for any adventure, and the process becomes smoother. Your DR isn’t some untouchable fantasy—it’s a place you can visit with the right mindset. Theme park energy, but make it metaphysical. 🎢✨
16: "I'm not excited about going to my DR like some heavenly dream world. That's just unrealistic."
Thank you for saying this, because it’s time to drag the “heavenly DR” myth. DRs aren’t utopias, and expecting them to be perfect sets you up for disappointment. Shifting is about experiencing another reality, not escaping to some flawless paradise.
Here’s the tea:
Every DR has challenges. Just like CR, your DR will have ups and downs. That doesn’t make it any less real or amazing—it just makes it dynamic and authentic.
Thinking of your DR as a “heavenly dream world” adds unnecessary pressure. When you finally shift and realize your DR isn’t perfect, you risk feeling disillusioned or disappointed.
The truth? Your DR is real, but it’s not going to solve all your problems or fulfill all your fantasies. Treat it as an exciting new chapter, not a flawless escape. The more grounded your expectations, the more satisfying your experience will be. ✨
17: "Judging people for what they do in their DR based on CR standards is usually wrong."
Finally, a take that makes sense! This is the kind of nuance we need in the shifting community. DRs operate on their own rules, and trying to apply CR standards to them is like judging a fish for not climbing a tree.
Here’s why this is on point:
Different realities, different rules. What might be morally or socially acceptable in CR could be completely irrelevant in a DR. People shift to explore and experience, not to replicate the exact conditions of CR.
Judging others is counterproductive. Shifting is deeply personal. Someone’s DR journey might be about exploring sides of themselves that they suppress in CR, and that’s valid. As long as they’re not harming others, it’s not your business.
Let’s be clear, though: this doesn’t excuse harmful behavior in DRs. If someone’s intentionally scripting unethical or damaging scenarios, that’s a different conversation. But for the most part, let people live and shift without your CR morality checklist. 🌀✨
18: "Every single thing you script has far-reaching consequences that you cannot imagine until you get there. If you script that you can't sweat or can't grow body hair, you'll show up in your DR with some medical condition that causes those things."
Girl, when we thought there was progress... you do THIS?! Let’s break it down, because this take is serving a mix of paranoia and half-truths, and I’m disappointed.
Yes, scripting can shape your DR reality, but this idea that every single detail comes with “far-reaching consequences” is dramatic and misleading.
Scripting sets intentions. If you script that you don’t sweat, your DR might interpret that literally, but it doesn’t mean you’re suddenly cursed with a medical condition. Your DR adapts to your intentions, not in some twisted monkey’s paw way, but in alignment with your desires.
This take leans heavily into fear-mongering. It’s important to script mindfully, but implying that a poorly worded script will backfire catastrophically is unnecessary drama.
Let’s not scare people into thinking shifting is a minefield of unintended consequences. Scripting is flexible and intuitive. If you don’t like something in your DR, you can shift back and adjust. Chill, girl—it’s not that deep. 😒✨
19: "Things in reality don't just fucking happen for no reason."
This is facts, but let’s unpack it fully. Whether it’s CR or DR, reality operates on cause and effect. Your actions, intentions, and beliefs shape your experience.
Here’s the tea:
In shifting, your subconscious mind plays a huge role. Nothing “just happens.” If you experience something unexpected in your DR, it’s often tied to unintentional thoughts, emotions, or residual CR beliefs.
This take is a good reminder to take responsibility for your scripting and intentions. You are the architect of your DR. If something goes awry, it’s not because the universe is out to get you—it’s because of how you set the framework.
That said, let’s not act like every single thing needs to be micromanaged. Part of the fun of shifting is letting your DR surprise you. Control the big stuff, but leave room for spontaneity. Your DR doesn’t need to feel like a sterile checklist. ✨
20: "Scripting yourself a dysfunctional abusive family on purpose is fucked up."
YES, babe, say it louder for the people in the back! This is a take I fully agree with. If you’re intentionally scripting harmful or abusive dynamics into your DR, you need to seriously reflect on why.
Here’s why this is so problematic:
Your DR is a space for growth, healing, and exploration. Why would you willingly bring toxicity into it? If you want to explore complex relationships, that’s fine, but scripting outright abuse is deeply concerning.
This kind of scripting raises ethical red flags. Even if DR characters are technically constructs, the energy and intent behind scripting abuse can reflect unresolved issues or harmful tendencies.
Shifting is a powerful tool—don’t misuse it by scripting negativity for the sake of drama. If you’re scripting toxic situations, ask yourself what you’re really seeking. Your DR should uplift you, not drag you into unnecessary harm. Do better. 🖤✨
Let’s wrap this up with love and clarity, babes. 💖✨"
So, after unpacking @sectumsempress’s (Christine’s) points, here’s the bottom line: Shifting is YOUR journey. Some of her takes were valid, others were shaky, and a few? Well, they needed a reality check. But hey, that’s the beauty of conversations like these—it gives us a chance to reflect, grow, and strengthen our understanding of shifting.
Remember:
Shifting is deeply personal. What works for one person might not work for you, and that’s okay.
Misinformation doesn’t define you. Always question, explore, and trust your intuition.
You are capable, worthy, and enough. Whether you’re scripting, visualizing, or just starting out, your DR is closer than you think.
At the end of the day, the shifting community thrives when we support, uplift, and educate each other. So let’s keep pushing forward with confidence, kindness, and a whole lot of sass. Your reality is yours to create—don’t let anyone dim that light. 💅✨
#reality shifting#shiftblr#shifting#shifting community#desired reality#shifting realities#shifters#reality shifter#shifting antis dni#reality shift#shifting stories#shifting blog#shifting motivation#shifting reality#shift#reality shifting community#permashifting#shifter#scripting#shiftok#current reality#shiftinconsciousness
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i’m not sure if you’re currently writing for ushijima but if you are/will, could u write something smutty about reader telling him that they have an oral fixation 🤞 (i haven’t really seen any of your works for ushijima so i’m quite curious about how you write him. love your toji works, btw! <3)
Mouth on Body Experience
Oml you're my first HQ!! request, noonie! :00 Tbh with you, I never posted any of my HQ!! works because it was during a time when I was on and off with writing (not to mention it was chara x chara stuff bc I wasn't into x reader stuff back then), so this surprised me when I saw it in my inbox, lol. But I love Ushijima sm, like he's so cool and is definitely one of my top characters in the entire series!! Hope I did him justice in my writing since it's been so long, ty for this prompt! o(≧▽≦)o
Also, s/o to my wonderful mootie, @cu7ie, for helping me out with this!! I hope your day is going swell and wish nothing but good vibes your way~~ ☆ mwah-mwah!!
Cw: Ushijima x reader - explicit content; minors DNI - oral (m! receiving)/blowjob + handjob; implied first time giving him a bj - teasing; biting/sucking on the body (reader exploring Ushi's body with their mouth) - humping + grinding - tiny overstimulation for Ushi - pet names (baby, love) - kissing/makeout session - minor ball worship - Ushi is a bit confused but supportive - will proofread later :P. Wc: 2.6k
You peek through the door to the bedroom, taking the silence into account despite knowing someone is occupying the space. He prefers silence anyway, so it's no surprise that the television isn't even on. The only things that bring life into the room are the warm colors of the sunset painting the walls and your boyfriend sitting on the edge of his bed.
Having Wakatoshi Ushijima as your boyfriend is one of the many mysteries to the world and you. As many outside observers would think, being in a relationship with the guy has been quite a journey. Not to say that is a bad thing, though. If anything, it's been going rather well.
Going into the relationship knowing you'd be dating one of the world's Olympic powerhouse volleyball players was intimidating enough. Yet, it's a different story actually meeting and talking with him in person, his fierce aura adequate to suffocate you then and there. But as the days go by and things calm down, you two slowly but surely feel comfortable in each other's presence. You start acting like a couple and expressing your love naturally.
You knock on the door, waiting for his permission before proceeding inside. When you hear his voice call to you, you move past the entrance and enter his room.
On the edge of the bed sat Ushijima in his usual comfortable house wear comprising of a plain white tee and sweatpants. His eyes focused on the item in his hands, a book that his eyes diligently skimmed from page to page. His concentration doesn't hinder until he notices you walking up to him, his face lifted slightly to look at your figure entirely.
"Hey," you greet him, to which he returns with an incline of his head. "What're you reading?"
"It's the book you left here last night," his deep voice still has you hard to believe, but it's become a welcoming timbre in your everyday life and is now something you love to hear. "I saw the reviews on the back and it had me interested."
You lift a brow. "You read the reviews on the cover?"
He lifts a brow in return. "Are they meant to be ignored?"
The giggle is stifled, trying to exit your lips. So thorough. "No, no, you can read them. Most people will read because of a cover or if the writer is their favorite." Your boyfriend watches you sit beside him, leaning against his shoulder as he returns to his reading. I bet he's gonna read the author's notes at the end when he's done.
You chuckle at your own joke, but Ushijima doesn't pay any mind, just putting an arm around your waist to keep you close to him. The two of you relish in each other's company; the warm hues peeking through the window blinds cover your backs with an imperceptible blanket of warmth.
With the rise and fall of his shoulder, you bask in the sun's dying glow while your breathing syncs with the man next to you. This moment almost fills you with peace, embracing the domestic feel within this space between you and your boyfriend.
But, again, it almost does the job. Because you remember why you even came into his space in the first place and the butterflies in your stomach party to your dreadful dismay.
You peer up to look at Ushijima, who keeps reading until you call for his attention. "Hey, Toshi?" His olive eyes flicker to you when you use his nickname, and your heart skips a bit when he immediately shifts his engagement to you. "C-Can I kiss you?" You don't know why you stammered around your words; it was a simple request, nothing too extreme. It's not like you two have never kissed before, but the idea in your head makes it nerve-wracking.
The tall man displays no reaction outside of a slight lift of a brow, but no words are needed when he places the book down by his side and his hand rest on your soft cheek. Your eyes instinctively close when his face decreases the gap between you, and firm, smooth lips land on your plump own. Just when you would sink into his touch, he withdraws himself from you, leaving a tiny whimper to exit your mouth.
"Can..." Your hand finds its way to the big one on the side of your face, his thumb stroking your cheek's surface. "Can I have another?"
Again, he doesn't use his words, just inclining his head towards you to kiss you. It's a few seconds longer than the last before he removes himself again, only for you to grip his shirt to restrict him. "Another, please..." your voice dials to a whisper, and a soft moan is shared when his lips return to yours. He retires again. "Anoth—"
Before long, Ushijima shushes your pleas with kisses without further approval. His hands bring you closer to him, and — before you know it — he's now on his back to the bed with you straddling him. Large palms roam around your waist and hips while you kiss him back, slowly venturing further down with each hump of the hips to gently grasp your ass.
There's no point in restraining the moans that naturally flee out of your mouth. This is what you wanted; this is what you came to the room for.
Well, to be specific, it's leading to what you came here for.
Throughout this relationship, you have yet to disclose your oral fixation. Perhaps it's because being with a man like Ushijima still intimidates you to share your sexual interests with the man. Nonetheless, it's something you've been longing to share with him. There have been instances where it would sneak in through your intimate moments, yet you choose to stop yourself and not ruin the atmosphere with your boyfriend.
So you've resorted to relinquishing this craving with activities to keep you busy: the usually chewing gum, biting or sucking on your tongue, or chewing on your nails.
Regardless, today is the day you try to initiate this part of your being with Ushijima. You've been dying to have your mouth on his body for the longest time — especially with how attractive and well-built the man is has been driving you crazy.
It all excites you, enthralls you. However, you snap back to reality when you hear a hot groan from the man you're straddling, realizing you're still kissing him. To your horror, finding yourself sucking on his tongue, you quickly exit off the bed. Heavy pants from the two of you fill the bedroom, and your wide eyes look into his hooded dirty gold ones.
"I-I'm so sorry, Toshi!" You're quick to throw apologies his way. "I got a little ahead of myself!"
"Mmm. It's fine." He nonchalantly reassures you, wiping the spit on his lips with the back of his hand.
Yet, you continue to ramble on. "No, really, sorry about that! I got a little carried away. I was thinking too much..."
"Thinking about what?"
Oh shit.
Now why the hell would you put yourself out like that? "Huh?" You try to play dumb despite understanding it won't work on him.
Ushijima exhales through his nose before hoisting himself up from the bed. "It's pointless to back out of something when you're the one who's done it." His blunt words hit like knives to your figure, internally groaning as he stands up in front of you. "What's on your mind, Y/n?"
Oh fuck, I've done it now. There is no way out of this; you'll have to tell him what's been troubling you recently.
"I...I wanna—Okay. So, I have this thing with my mouth, right?" You can tell the expression on Ushijima's face doesn't coincide with the supportive nod. "It's like...It's a habit of mine where I use my mouth on stuff to stimulate myself?" At this point, you don't know what the fuck you're talking about. Just get this over with, me! I can't take it!!
"So, I've been thinking of...you know," your mind and gut are doing gymnastics, toying with your uncomfortableness to this entire situation. "I want to use my mouth...on your body...."
Olive brown brows furrow and you quickly sprout more nonsense. "Th-That's unless you're okay with it! If you don't think you're okay with it or you feel discomfort, then I won't be hurt in any way! It's totally up to you because I can just—"
"Y/n." Your rambles are muted by the use of your name, his brows still scrunched with an indistinct expression. "I'm not following: why would you want to use your mouth on my body?"
"Well, because," your face gets hot by the second: not just from you revealing your secret, but also your boyfriend asking questions. "I like your body, Toshi. Especially with how nice your physique is, I just kinda want to...play with it a little? Make you feel good..."
Ushijima's facial expression molds to a softer tone when you confess to him, and his eyes drift to the side as if he's searching for the right words to say. It makes you anxious with how in-depth he's taking this into heart, so you squeak when his goldish orbs return to you. "Is it something that I can help with?"
"Umm, yes, yeah!" Confirmation stammers out your lips. "I mean, as long as you're up for it."
He places his hands on your waist to bring you close to him. "I am."
He looks at you with hooded eyes, and the romantic tension from before fills the room. "Yeah?" Your voice winds down to a murmur.
"Yeah." His voice lowers as his head comes down to you, and your lips once again welcome the feel of his.
And with that, Ushijima finds himself back on the bed with you on top of him. You carry more confidence than previously as your kisses become more passionate and hot, teeth bumping into each other and you nibbling on his lip, resulting in abrupt groans.
Your hands venture down to the hem of his shirt, hesitantly raising it inch by inch. And Ushijima notices your desire for access, and a big hand engulfs yours and lifts the shirt to reveal his abdomen and pectorals.
Kisses from the mouth trail down to his neck and clavicle, and he tries to stop himself from moaning to your sweet touches. Your lips pepper all that's exposed to you, quick licks onto his pecs, and gentle bites on his nipples. It's evident now that the man is enjoying your actions, limiting the pleasure in his voice while his hands stick to your waist as his hips rock with yours.
Your hand sneaks down from his well-defined abs to his pelvis, fingers intruding under the band of his sweatpants and brushing against the soft material of his briefs that shield his now erect cock from your mere fingertips. Ushijima hums with his baritone voice, large palms dare calm down to your butt and knead the flesh, and you purr to his firm grasp.
"May I use my mouth?" It was a tiny suggestion, yet there was a distinct connotation. You haven't ever given your boyfriend a blowjob before, so this was new waters you were treading cautiously with. Nevertheless, he surprises you with a nod, egging you on to resume. A feeling of giddiness corrupts your senses, placing chaste kisses on his nipple down to his abs, and Ushijima has his hand on your head the further you go to his lower region.
You're now on your knees on the floor as you pull his sweatpants and underwear to his thighs, and the image of his erection springing out in front of your eyes has you practically drooling in anticipation. Every crevice, every dent, and every vein of his dick is mesmerizing to the eyes, and your curiosity gets the best of you when his body jerks at your hands grazing his balls. How vulgar.
"Hmmm, Y/n, love," he calls to you with whimpers — a rarity to hear but beautiful to the ears. "Go easy on me..."
And you just give him a lovely smile before you move a hand on his cock, stroking the length in a slow but firm motion. He jolts to your grasp, throwing his head back and sinking into the mattress as your palm slides up and down his limb. It gets worse for him when he feels your tongue flicks on his balls, sucking on his sack prompts moans of bliss to substitute the silence of the room.
The summer sun continues to descend, the waning heat losing its touch in the room. But the warm sensation of your mouth on his shaft has Ushijima's skin hot to the touch, his hands gripping the comforter beneath him. And he hisses when he senses the work of your tongue on the tip of his couch, lapping on the sensitive glands while simultaneously stroking him and massaging his sack.
Your cheeks go hollow when you take the head to your mouth, relaxing your jaw as you gradually suck all of him at your own pace. Your boyfriend has to bite on his lip and try to not buck his hips toward you. But it feels so fucking good when the velvety walls of your throat accommodate his girth and size; your wet muscle on the underside of his dick sends electric waves every time it brushes up and down from your bobbing gesture.
As for you, it feels like you're under an ecstatic spell as you work your way to the base of his cock with every suck. The cockhead hits the back of your throat at a delicious angle that you mewl on the member, eyes shut to fully enjoy the experience and commotion between your lips. Tears start to prickle, spit and drool coat his shaft, and your brain goes foggy when his musk blocks your nostrils. The throbbing sensation between your legs gets unbearable by the second, and you grind your thighs together to ease your lust.
Ushijima has done well trying to maintain his steel composure; however, no matter how he tries, he soon succumbs to the warm and pleasurable feeling of your throat when he thrusts into your oral cavity at a reasonable tempo, going faster and faster when the notion of his release crawls up within him.
"Haaaah, ahhhh—Mmmph!" Moans fly out from his mouth, no longer attempting to keep this from escaping. "Dove, I'm about to cum in your—Hnnngh!! Ahhh, shit, shit," and he grabs your head to keep you steady as he ruts into your throat. The orgasm hits the both of you, and a few deep strokes result in him shooting his load inside you, forcing you to drink all he gives you.
And you happily do so, waiting for his thighs to stop jerking as you take in every bit of his essence. Once he's done ejaculating, you slowly remove yourself from his sock, a soft pop evidence of you two no longer connected. You swallow and gulp any remainder of his load before climbing back onto the bed to lay beside Ushijima, who turns to his side to survey you thoroughly with half-lidded eyes.
You sigh with a smile. "Enjoyed yourself?"
While his hand caresses your cheek, he hums as his response. "Did you?"
"Yes, very much so. Thank you, Toshi." You start to feel drowsy as the room becomes dark, the warm colors of the sunset dulling as the moon sheds light.
"Of course, dove."
#𝑯𝒐𝒔𝒉𝒊 ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ 𝑾𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒔: 𝑹𝒆𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒔#ushijima wakatoshi x reader#ushijima wakatoshi x you#ushijima x reader#ushijima imagine#ushijima smut#ushijima wakatoshi smut#ushijima fic#ushiwaka x reader#wakatoshi x reader#haikyuu smut#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu x gn!reader#haikyuu x gender neutral reader#haikyuu x poc!reader#haikyuu!! x reader#hq smut#hq x reader#hq imagines#haikyuu imagine
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SWEET — BBH
PAIRING: baekhyun x female reader SUMMARY: it's one thing to run into the guy you maybe, used to have a little bit of a thing for at your mutual friends' birthday party. it's another thing to find out he maybe, used to have a little bit of a thing for you too. GENRE: friends (ish) to lovers! au, romance, a hint of smut, some pining if you squint WARNINGS: swearing, alcohol consumption, jenkai (humour me), wayyyy too much sexual tension, it gets a little hot and heavy towards the end but nothing super explicit (bc idk how to write that stuff sorry!), general mature content and themes WORD COUNT: 4.4k NOTE: super self-indulgent w barely any plot or characterisation (basically four thousand something words of foreplay lol), i saw that video of baek at one of the lonsdaleite stops unbuttoning his shirt and it drove me a little loopy ngl...
The last time you had seen Byun Baekhyun was two years ago.
Graduation. Gowns. Bouquets. There was probably a photo of the two of you, along with the rest of your cohort, sitting around somewhere in the depths of your camera roll, fresh-faced and eager to take on the exciting new world outside of 3000-word essays and 9 am tutorials. Four years taking variations of the same courses and bitching about the same tutors meant you were far from strangers, but sadly, the friendship had dwindled once you’d left the classrooms for good — something you had been just a little gutted about. These days, his appearances in your life were rare, save for the times he’d come up in conversation with the friends you both shared back in the day, or his sporadic likes on your instagram posts.
Except now, of course, as you watched him climb up the stairs to the rooftop bar, gift bag in one hand and suit jacket in the other.
“Happy birthday!” he beamed, enveloping your best friend in a hug. The fabric of his shirt strained against the movement of his arms, and you caught a whiff of his delicious woody cologne as he approached.
You had known there’d be a possibility he’d show up today. This year, Jennie had made the enlightened decision to throw a joint celebration with her boyfriend, and obviously that entailed inviting all of his friends — which honestly, wasn’t even that many extra heads since Jongin only ever spoke to the same eight people. You’d seen Baekhyun’s name on the guest list that you had helped her put together, and seen it again listed under the ‘going’ tab of the event, but having the real deal in front of you was another experience entirely.
Crisp white button down with the sleeves rolled up, fitted slacks, and just a glimpse of his toned chest peeking out from where the top few of his shirt buttons were undone.
He looked fucking good.
Even better than he did two years ago.
Jennie squeezed him back with just as much fervour. “So glad you could make it! Jongin’s been stuck to my side all night with no one to talk to, he’s going to be so happy you’re here.”
He pulled back with a chuckle, and it was then that he finally laid eyes on you, seated next to the birthday girl, holding matching martinis, and doing your best not to look like you had been shamelessly checking him out for the entire 45 seconds since he had arrived. His eyes widened slightly with recognition as your name left his mouth.
“You haven’t forgotten each other, right?” Jennie laughed. The descent of his eyes down the length of you was quick, but not careless, and heat flared in your body all the same. When his gaze returned back to your face, the beginnings of an appreciative smile were shaping the curve of his mouth.
“Not yet, I hope,” he answered her, but his eyes were still on you. “Nice seeing you again. You look good.”
“So do you, Baekhyun,” you replied, because it was the truth. His smile only grew.
Jennie tipped back the rest of her martini and bade the both of you a hasty farewell, saying something about fixing up the photo zone as she hurried towards the other end of the rooftop. A few of the girls, too excited about the open bar, had knocked the cushions onto the ground, and were doing a poor job of rearranging them back on the wooden swing.
He slid into her now-vacant seat, elbows resting on the bar counter, giving you an excellent view of the shape of his forearms and the veins that adorned it.
“You’re not going to have that?” he asked, nodding at the sad little olive that sat all alone at the bottom of your empty glass.
“Not a fan of the saltiness,” you answered, and offered it to him. You watched as he plucked the garnish stick out of your fingers and put the olive in his mouth with no hesitation, eyes lingering a little too long on the movement of his throat as he swallowed it. “I like sweet things better.”
“Yeah, I remember,” he chuckled. “You used to only ever drink vodka cranberries.”
Suddenly, you were twenty-one again, peering through the cafe window and getting a little too giddy at the thought of meeting up outside of the stuffy tutorial classroom to work on the project you had both been assigned to. You’d be lying through your teeth if you said that a crush on Baekhyun was something you never entertained throughout your four years of university together. And maybe it had been reciprocated, for the briefest of times, just after that joint presentation on data structures, where the thought of stepping over from friendly more-than-acquaintances into something more had crossed your mind enough times for you to lose count. There had been something there, or at the very least a hint of something, in the nights spent crammed into a tiny library booth meant only for one person, poring over stale and tedious papers on algorithm organisations in each other’s company.
But nothing had happened. He hadn’t made a move, and neither had you, laden with the fear of rejection that was so indicative of youth. And maybe that had been a huge misplay on your part, because a few weeks after wrapping up the project that had brought you together, he was at your faculty’s monthly pub crawl, introducing you to his new girlfriend, who had actually asked him out just the day before.
Safe to say that had been the end of that. You were not the type to homewreck.
“How long has it been? I feel like I haven’t seen you since — god, it must have been graduation?”
“Something like that,” you replied through a smile. “I still have the photos on my phone.”
“So do I,” he said, flashing you a boyish grin. Then, as if doubting the accuracy of his own words, he promptly pulled out his phone and began scrolling towards the top, brows furrowed with determination. It was a few seconds later that he found what he was looking for, turning the screen towards you with a triumphant noise.
The picture had been taken outside the ceremony hall, set against the familiar sea of graduation gowns, but that was the only familiar thing about it. In the foreground stood just you and Baekhyun, not stiffly posing for the camera as you had been in all of the group shots that existed on your phone, but turned towards each other, faces bursting with elated smiles. Neither of you looked to be aware that there was even a camera on you. The you in the photo had your mouth half open in the tell-tale way it always did when you were about to laugh at the ridiculously corny jokes he loved to crack. His eyes were crinkled at the corners, partially from the glare of the sun overhead — the weather had been phenomenal for the usual gloominess of May — and partially in delight at your reaction, having cracked said joke.
“I’ve never seen this one before. Did you forget to Airdrop this to me on the day?” you asked, a joking accusation colouring your voice.
“My mum only sent it to me a whole month later. I didn’t even know she had taken these,” he said, zooming in to better see the expressions on your upturned faces. “We look so happy here,” he added, voice tinged with a hint of nostalgia.
“And young,” you agreed, but not without a sigh. The you of two years ago had yet to know the pains of having seven different bills to pay every month, and watching the money trickle out of your bank account like water from a leaking tap.
He gave you a gentle, teasing nudge with his elbow. “We’re not that old now. We could definitely still pass as twenty somethings.”
“That’s probably because we are still actually twenty somethings,” you countered with a laugh.
There was an unprecedented ease with which you fell into conversation with Baekhyun. Despite the considerable gap of silence between now and the last time you had seen him, there was nothing in his demeanour or your own that indicated just how much time had passed. It was rather comforting to see a face from your university days, and even better that that face was still as gorgeous as ever.
You watched as he flicked through a few more photos from the day, mostly of him and his friends from university — one of whom was the other main event of tonight — until he landed on a picture of him with his girlfriend. You recognised the photo, seeing as you had been the one who offered to take it. He had an arm around her waist while she carried a huge bouquet with a teddy bear sitting atop the arrangement.
“Didn’t I help you order that thing?” you asked, pointing to the flowers in her hand. He hummed in agreement, but didn’t say much else, scrolling through to the next photos with his parents, which had also been taken by you. They stood on either side of him, beaming with pride, and then there were a few after that with his girlfriend as well, the four of them all standing together and looking picture-perfect.
Perhaps the you of today would have chosen differently, found the balls to ask him out first — because what was the use in sitting and waiting around for the guy to make the first move? — and maybe you’d be the one in the photo instead, smiling up at the camera, an integral part of the family portrait. Maybe he’d be running his fingers across the inner curve of your wrist, instead of along the rim of the gin and tonic he had just ordered.
“She couldn’t make it today? Or was she not invited?” you asked, having not seen anyone walk in behind him. Although you hadn’t been paying much attention to anything else since he arrived, and if she had been here, you doubted she’d be all too pleased with how close your heads were, even if he was just showing you through his camera roll. With that in mind, you drew back slightly, just enough to catch the expression on his face twisted with an odd sort of surprise.
After a second or so, it melted into an easy-going grin.
“We broke up a while ago. A month or two after graduation, actually.”
Oh.
You and your big mouth.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know — I shouldn’t have —”
“Don’t be, it’s fine,” he reassured, waving off your clumsy apologies. “Things just didn’t work out and we weren’t right for each other. It was a pretty amicable break, all things considered. But now, I get to sleep however I want in my own bed, so I really can’t complain,” he added, fishing another laugh out of you.
“Nothing beats starfishing in your sleep after a long day,” you hummed in agreement. Wednesday nights in your bedroom after a full day of client meetings could attest to that.
Baekhyun took a slow sip, pulling the drink into his mouth with a contemplative carefulness, and weighed up his words before he spoke again.
“What about you? Still with Jinyoung?” he asked, tone light and regarding you with curious eyes. Without meaning to, you let out a groan, and his left eyebrow quirked with interest.
“Don’t even go there,” you half-grimaced, reminded of the fling you had towards the end of fourth year with the business major. He was pretty, and had been nice enough, but by the fifth time he blew off spending time with you so that he could track the world stock indexes, it had become pretty clear that the two of you were on different paths in life. The sex was okay, but it had not been enough to warrant any more than a few late night rendezvous. For all you knew, he was probably now a very successful investment banker with 90 hour work weeks and making a shit-load of money you could only dream about having.
You sighed, drumming your fingers against the counter. “Let’s just say, he was more interested in looking at his dividend yields than he was in me.”
Baekhyun’s gaze flickered over the rest of you again, taking in the ridges of your collarbone and the soft curve of your waist, the touch of his eyes hovering above your skin like a tangible thing. You tried your best to look unaffected, forcing yourself to remain still under the weight of his stare despite the way it was melting you down to your bones.
“He definitely did not have his priorities in order,” he said, once his eyes ended their journey and returned back to your face. “You’re much nicer to look at.”
His words settled beneath your skin, pulling a sweet warmth to your cheeks that slowly radiated through the rest of your body. You watched as his mouth curved around the rim of his glass again, and followed the path of the drink down the length of his throat.
“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were flirting with me.”
He rewarded you with a sly smile.
“Then maybe you don’t know any better.”
Christ. Those were definitely bedroom eyes.
Your lips parted again, though you had little idea as to the words which were preparing to come out of them. Forming coherent and decent thoughts proved to be a great struggle when he looked like he was undressing you with his eyes. His tongue darted out to wet his bottom lip, and you swore you could have crumpled right then and there if it hadn’t been for the bar stool underneath you.
“Baekhyun, you’re finally here,” said a giggly Jongin, suddenly appearing between the two of you with Jennie in tow.
The tension from seconds earlier dissipated as quickly as it had formed.
Someone (the birthday boy) had evidently made good use of the open bar to shed the self-imposed shell that came with introversion before the arrival of his friend. “I’m so, so happy to see you. We need to do some shots right now,” he said, now all serious, leaning over to peer at the drinks menu that he himself had signed off on.
Baekhyun was the first to break eye contact, turning to flash Jongin a fond smile. “Sounds like the best idea you’ve ever had,” he said, before downing the rest of his gin and tonic.
The birthday girl requested tequila shots, and the bartender was quick to supply, lining up four glasses and filling them with the clear alcohol that was a recurring character in all your worst hangover episodes. You passed them around, but not before turning back around to the bar for one more thing.
“And a vodka cranberry, please,” you added, catching the amused smile Baekhyun threw your way.
“For old time’s sake.”
It was approaching the early hours of the morning when the remainder of the party retired to the hotel suite Jennie had booked for the night. One of her chill, moody, late-night R&B playlists had been queued up and was playing softly on the speaker system in the living room — she had a playlist for every conceivable mood and situation — and you could just make out the melody of a Daniel Caesar song, quiet and soothing against the nighttime.
“Okay, you win,” Baekhyun conceded with amusement, sitting up to grab the soju bottle from your outstretched hand. “I’ve never had someone throw up on me, at least not on the first date.” He settled back against the pillows, bringing the bottle to his lips to take a small, slow sip.
“Thanks, but it’s a victory I’d rather not have. There’s no pride in knowing I’m the only person I know to have a guy spew all over my shoes within ten minutes of meeting me,” you said, leaning back and letting your hands sink into the plush comforter.
Some thirty or so minutes ago, you had found yourself in one of the smaller rooms of the suite, sitting across from Baekhyun with nothing but a few inches of egyptian cotton separating you. All night, you had felt his presence, whether it was the light brush of his warm fingers across the bare skin of your shoulder to grab your attention, or the weight of his stare from across the rooftop bar while you posed for pictures with Jennie and the rest of the girls. He had infiltrated your senses, occupying his own little space in the corner of your consciousness. Right now, having the whole of him so unobstructed before you, being the sole focus of his attention within the four walls of this small room — it was obvious that the alcohol wasn’t the only thing bringing a heady warmth to your face.
He levelled you with a careful look, and instead of handing the bottle back to you as he had done for the last thirty minutes, he set it onto the nightstand beside the bed with a soft clink. You raised a quizzical eyebrow at him.
“I think you should probably slow down,” he said, catching the curious tilt of your head. “Wouldn’t want you to do something you regret.”
You let a coy smile turn the corners of your mouth upward, shifting your weight off your hands and leaning towards him ever so slightly. “Trust me, I know my limits,” you said, and moved to grab the bottle.
The hand you placed on the top of his thigh to steady yourself as you reached over him was deliberate, and you failed to hide the deepening of your smile when you felt the muscles flex beneath your fingers. You also didn’t miss the dip of his eyes below the neckline of your dress as you hovered over him, only pulling back once the cool glass of the bottleneck was firmly in your grasp. The glimmer in his eyes, previously light and boyish, had darkened imperceptibly.
You were playing a dangerous game, and you both knew it.
Beyond the door, Jennie’s playlist had changed to something a little more sultry, Kehlani’s honeyed voice now floating among the sounds of the city from below. His gaze remained on you as you raised the bottle to your lips, tilting it back and letting the tartness of the grape soju fill your mouth.
The song wasn’t the only thing that had changed. There was a palpable shift in the room, a simmering heat gradually seeping into the atmosphere, brought on by your brazen touch. Still, he kept a safe distance, giving you the reins and the freedom to dispel the tension you had created.
Which you had absolutely no intention to.
You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth, relishing in the way his eyes immediately left yours to track the movement. “You know,” you began, turning the bottle over in your hands, “I used to have a bit of a thing for you.”
His eyebrows raised with interest, but there was also a hint of surprise layered beneath.
“Third year, that data algorithms project. I thought a lot about asking you out, actually,” you continued, watching as his face slowly took on a smile at your words. A soft laugh escaped those pretty lips, as if he was enjoying some private joke that you weren’t in on. Without meaning to, you leaned in, drawn to the sound, wanting to understand the amusement behind it.
“You wanna know something?” he asked, to which you weren’t sure if you had actually nodded, or if you had only imagined that you did, too preoccupied by the inviting curve of his mouth.
He was all too willing to comply with the unspoken request behind your curious eyes, moving forward at a languid pace, until his lips hovered just over the shell of your ear, not quite touching, but close enough that you could feel the fluttering pull of air with each of his inhales and exhales. You could smell him too, his cologne now infused with the scent of his skin over the course of the evening, smooth and sweet, and much too dizzying.
His cheek brushed yours for a fraction of a second before you registered the conspiratorial whisper in your ear.
“So did I.”
You hadn’t even realised your own eyes had closed until they were fluttering open with his departure from your space. He pulled back, eyes gleaming with a furtive satisfaction like he had just let you in on some big, juicy, forbidden secret. It took a while for your chest to start pulling oxygen back into your lungs again. How he could render you so breathless when he had barely even touched you — you would’ve been embarrassed if not for the foggy warmth circling your head and radiating throughout the rest of your body, leaving you oblivious to everything but the sheer force of how much you wanted him.
He reached for the bottle, now almost empty, and you fought the flinch when you felt his fingers close around your hand. This time, you didn’t complain when he removed it from your grasp and set it back on the nightstand. The warmth of his hand did not leave yours, flipping it over to trail his fingers lightly across your knuckles.
“These are pretty,” he murmured, thumbing at the rings decorating your fingers. You could only manage a noncommittal hum in response. His touch had stolen your voice right out of your chest, along with all the rationality usually contained inside your mind, leaving you with nothing but the feeling of your own blood thrumming in your veins, hot and fast beneath your skin.
All night, you had danced around each other, stealing furtive glances and exchanging flirty smiles, carefully toeing around the edge of politeness and propriety. And maybe Baekhyun was just too polite, too respectful, letting you take the wheel and steer tonight in whichever direction you wanted, despite the want that was so clearly etched on his face.
Surely, your face was a mirror of his own. Surely, he could tell.
“Penny for your thoughts?” he asked, looking up at you with heavy-lidded eyes, unfurling your fingers to lace his own through them. The press of his warm skin against yours had you light-headed and almost delirious, but you forced your gaze to stay steady on him while you tried to find your voice again.
“I’m thinking,” you began, low and breathy, “about how you’ve been eye-fucking me this whole night.”
His sharp inhale was unmistakable above the quiet of the room. A meteor could have landed right outside the building and you wouldn’t even have noticed, held captive by his dangerous touch and the hunger flaring in his eyes.
“And,” you continued, “how I’ve been waiting for you to do something about it ever since you shut that door.”
The second after the words left your mouth seemed to stretch across an eternity. You watched as he registered them, transfixed by how his whole body seemed to cloud over with desire, pushing out any remaining trace of restraint.
One moment you were sitting on the bed, revelling in the delicious tension you had created, and the next he had pulled you flush against him. His mouth was on yours, hot and needy, the self-control he had been so meticulously keeping to for the entire night disappearing the instant he felt your lips move against his own. You were no better, hands leaving his to fist desperately at the fabric of his shirt. An airy moan left your throat when his tongue brushed against yours, letting you taste the sweetness you had been imagining ever since you laid eyes on him on the rooftop. He swallowed the sound, the plump flesh of his bottom lip tightening into a pleased smile at your reaction.
Baekhyun pulled away first, lips leaving yours to trail across your cheek and down the side of your neck, where you felt the light graze of his teeth over the skin, and then the wetness of his tongue following the same path. His hands had snaked around you, fingers digging into the curve of your waist, keeping you in place while he nipped at you, drawing stilted gasps out of your parted mouth. When he pulled the flesh into the warmth of his mouth and sucked it to a nice, dark bruise, the heat coiling in the pit of your stomach flared, violent and hungry.
You were going to lose your mind.
“You know, you could just try again,” you managed to get out between heaving breaths. “Ask me out.”
“Would you say yes?” he asked, and you felt his lips shape the words against your skin. They dragged back up the column of your throat, capturing your mouth again with another heated kiss that had your head spinning. He shifted, and your knees came to rest on either side of his leg, the firm muscles of his thigh pressing against the part of you that ached for his touch. In the haze of this moment, you didn’t know much, but you knew you would’ve said yes to absolutely anything to come out of that sweet, tempting mouth.
Still, you played along, letting a devious smile pull the corners of your mouth upwards. “That depends on how tonight goes.”
He drew back slightly, fixing you with a wicked look that held promises he was nothing short of determined to fulfil. You could see yourself reflected in the darkness of his blown-out pupils, flushed and already wrecked just from the attention of his mouth. Anticipation and thrill jolted through you like lightning, zipping through every cell in your body as your mind drifted to what he might have in store behind those enticing eyes.
You weren’t left wondering for long. His hands left your waist and moved to your calf, pushing up the silken fabric of your dress as they slowly crept upwards, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. The brush of his fingers against your inner thigh drew another shuddering breath out of you.
His next words were not unlike an oath.
“Then I’d better make tonight fucking spectacular.”
#baekhyun#exo baekhyun#byun baekhyun#baekhyun x reader#baekhyun smut#exo x reader#baekhyun fanfic#exo smut#baekhyun au#baekhyun fluff#kaleidohscopic works
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Amatonormative assumptions and the language of a hard launch: a rambly DnP essay thing
I have a lot of Discourse Thoughts about hard launching and all that, but there’s not much I can say that hasn’t already been said. This fandom is one that generally has significant representation on both sides of any major issue; any take you look for you can find someone genuinely believing. What I am interested in analyzing is how some people are insistent, whether or not they want it to happen or believe it will happen, that they haven’t Hard Launched, and others are equally insistent that they have. Because on the surface those should be completely contradictory takes, but a large amount of people believe each to be true.
I’ve seen posts making comparisons to PJ and Sophie, and I definitely think that’s a useful tool because it brings up the real question here: how do we speak about romantic and platonic relationships, and what underlying assumptions are at play when we use or don't use certain words?
Firstly, this issue is obviously mostly to entirely due to homophobia. Why do people assume PJ and Sophie are a couple just because they live together, even though they've never used the words? Because they're a man and a woman. Why couldn't DnP be publicly open about their relationship back in the day? Because they're gay. I'm not going to spend too much time on this point because it's obvious, but I feel like it's important to remember that Dan and Phil's relationship wasn't some Great Secret for no reason. They weren't no-homo-ing because of privacy or whatever, but because they weren't yet ready to face the immense challenges being publicly out sticks you with, especially in the early 2010s. If homophobia wasn't a thing, everything else I'm going to say in this post would still be true, but it would all be significantly less charged. Just remember that gay marriage wasn't legal in the UK when DnP met each other, and that 2000s pop culture overall was routinely, openly, virulently homophobic. Just keep that in mind. (Also, everything I talk about in this post refers to 2019 onwards, after they came out. I wasn't around for the no-homo era and can't speak on it. I'm also not going to be talking about the speculation around their relationship, because that's been talked about so much. It definitely is a factor in all of this, but you know that already)
Onto the main point of this post. The reason DnP haven't "hard launched" (that term itself is incredibly vague, but its popular meaning in this fandom seems to be explicit confirmation of a romantic relationship, which is how I'm using it here) while also having clearly done so is because their use of language does not line up with conventional expectations of how language around romantic and platonic relationships should be used.
The concept of "dating" as we think of it today is relatively recent, and language around it is even newer. The terms "boyfriend" and "girlfriend" only became prominent in the mid- to late- 20th century, and it took a while for them to gain the connotation (of almost always meaning a romantic relationship) that they have today. And yet people have still had romantic relationships for forever! How these things were described would depend on the society's norms around marriage and sex and often on the exact social dynamic of the couple. Today, we think we're better than all that and can find words for anything.
I'm no expert on what makes a relationship romantic vs platonic or even how to define those terms. I find it hard to define the concept of romance in a way that doesn't bring with it centuries of heteronormative amatonormative assumptions. And boy are there assumptions. (No, people who live together for life do not have to be romantically involved, that's a silly thing to believe.) When people see a relationship that lines up or does not line up with those assumptions, they expect it to have a clean, simple label. But the words we used for romantic relationships outside of marriage, due to how new they are, are completely not simple!
While these days they seem to be the most "unambiguous" terms to describe a romantic relationship, "boyfriend" and "girlfriend" are essentially euphemisms that can seem infantilizing and demeaning of the seriousness of a relationship. It's easy to see how they aren't for everyone, even if many people are fine using them for serious committed relationships. "Partner" is kind of ambiguous on purpose, thought like bf and gf, I think it's on its way to becoming a word with mainly romantic connotations. The term "significant other" is out of fashion these days, but just like bf, gf, and "partner," it's basically a euphemism that doesn't mean much in and of itself. We have no words to describe an unmarried romantic couple that aren't on some level unclear or unindicative of the actual nature of the relationship.
Dan and Phil have acknowledged that they were once in a romantic relationship, have made many many jokes about having sex with each other, and are committed life partners. On some level, you can take the combination of these things as a very clear confirmation of a current romantic relationship, which many do. Yes, this requires making a few assumptions, but they aren't the craziest assumptions in the world. In fact, as one can see from the PJ and Sophie example, they are assumptions that are often normal and expected to be made in social situations. So why do so many others not see it this way?
Well for one, we are a mostly queer community that understands the complexity of queer relationships and how these assumptions do not get applied equally. We see how these assumptions are often used against queer people to devalue their identities, especially those on the ace-aro spectrum and/or in queerplatonic relationships. We also are an extremely online community, familiar with the complicated layers of discourse around RPF and shipping, and hesitant to make assumptions in a way that could potentially damage relationships or invade someone's privacy.
But honestly? It's because DnP don't call themselves boyfriends. They don't explicitly frame their activities in romantic ways (e.g. call things dates). The terms they use and jokes they make, even in 2024, are not the sort of things we expect from the set of assumptions that go with a committed romantic relationship. (This is also where the discourse about whether or not they're open/poly comes from, but that's a topic for another day.)
The Date Night video stretches this to its absolute max. The game is full of cards about kissing and other things that fit cleanly into the set of romantic relationship assumptions, but they didn't use any of those cards. They only used things that were ambiguous, and tried to downplay the romantic implications as much as possible aside from the lampshading of it at the start of the video ("this is a great game to play with your best buddy as well" "phil says no homo" as well as the entire "ugh i can't believe they send us this" tone of the intro). The use of "partner" in this video is the clearest example of this. The game uses this word exclusively- after all, it's a standard, accepted, gender-neutral word for people in a romantic relationship. Phil confidently reads it off the card, with the "I don't care which set of assumptions this assigns us" attitude that's been prevalent over the past year and past few months especially. Dan avoids it half the time, and at the end of the video, seems to clearly mock the term, saying it in a silly voice and then comparing it to how stereotypical cowboys use the word. This stuck out to me; it made it very noticeable that they don't use that word at least in videos, and made me think about the connation of the word they do use-- "friend." That term, unlike any of the words I've mentioned so far, implies literally nothing. "Friends" can be people with a barely positive relationship or people with an incredibly meaningful relationship they center their life around. With no other qualifiers, it also implies that the people in question don't have a romantic relationship (are "just friends"), or even (because of amatonormativity) that their relationship is not especially deep or meaningful.
Dan and Phil have defined their relationship in quite a few ways-- or rather, Dan has, in BIG and in his interviews for WAD. These quotes circulate on here constantly as people discuss the meaning of them. I'm not really interested in talking about those as they've already been talked to death. I do think it's worth noting that we only get these things from Dan-- the one time Phil has ever spoken on his "current dating life" it was just to say "I don't want to talk about that, the door is closed." Obviously some of this is because the interviewers were pushy, but also I'm sure Dan enjoys his elaborate poetic metaphors enough to not be able to shut up about them haha. (Very unrelated but I wonder if this will come up if they end up doing interviews for TIT?) The thing is, these definitions show a deep, meaningful, complex, committed relationship. They include directly romantic terms like "husbands," "soul mates," and "normal gay relationship." You would think being willing to call someone your husband, even with a million other words around it, would mean you wouldn't have a problem calling them your partner, right? Yet these words do not reflect the language they use when speaking about each other in videos!
There are times when they say "friend" "buddy" or "mate" in a clearly humorous, ironic way, and seem aware that it isn't a term that makes people think of a committed, long term relationship. Other times, they use the word as if it is a fully accurate descriptor of their relationship-- in the glue story, Dan jokes about being ashamed to be seen as "the friend of the glue guy," and in How Phil Nearly Died, he quotes himself telling the hospital staff he is looking for "my friend." I use the hospital stories as examples because they are high-stakes (or seemingly high-stakes in the case of the glue story) situations and examples of how other people in their real lives perceive them. The way they choose to tell these stories to the internet is one in which the fact that a random hospital worker would likely interact differently with Dan if he was Phil's friendly roommate as opposed to his life partner doesn't matter. In other words: if they actually do call each other "friends" irl around strangers, those strangers probably have a very different impression of their relationship than we do. Their consistency in describing themselves doing so just means that they want to consistently use the term "friends" in their videos, not that they actually do that in real life. But to a viewer who is unsure about their relationship status, the fact that they are clearly life partners, no matter platonic or romantic, but in all situations opt for a word that does not imply that seems to be confirmation that their relationship is not clearly romantic, or at least that they don't want to refer to it as such.
If I have to draw a conclusion from all this, it's that DnP consider their relationship very complex and unusual (ymmv on if it is, lol) and have had to deal with a ridiculous level of scrutiny about it nonetheless. Again, Phil has almost never spoken on this, but Dan clearly dislikes any descriptor that carries with it a sense of assumptions about the nature of the relationship, hence why he uses like fifty contradicting ones or strange metaphors instead. "Friend" carries with it no assumptions. You can be "friends" and be in a romantic relationship-- plenty of people say "I married my best friend." But our society considers romantic relationships to be more meaningful and important than platonic ones. People assume that if you are in a romantic relationship, you would want to describe your relationship exclusively using terms that carry that set of assumptions, because that is the most important part about it. I honestly think Dan is being quite subversive in refusing to do so.
I have no idea if or when this will ever change, but I hope I've given enough context for those who are convinced they've already hard launched to understand why others are still waiting, and for those who don't think they have to understand why the issue is more complicated than it seems. This topic has fascinated me ever since I first started watching them, and I hope this post can help people reach a bit more of a understanding, rather than inciting more discourse.
#Obviously I am open to discussion and corrections#I wrote this all in one sitting and I'm sure I left things out or wrote things in unclear ways.#dan and phil#phan#dnp#mine#long-winded thoughts#danandphilology
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In Defense of Epic Manwhore au
Okay, so I’m kinda nervous to post this but I feel like it should be said. I hope I tagged correctly for the topics I discuss in this. So, in defense of the Manwhore au as for the concept being coerced, it’s not like the god(s) said ‘you’ll die if you don’t have sex with me’. Odysseus is the one who brings it up. Although yes, the line of consent there is a bit murky with Odysseus more doing so to get out of situations rather than because he wants to. It’s totally valid for some fans to not be a fan of the au, not everything in fan spaces is for everyone. You are entitled to your opinion and get to make your fandom experience safe for you. There is something I saw though that felt like commentary about those who came up with/ enjoy the au. To me this felt close to attempted fandom censoring or those who try to ‘cleanse’ all fandom content to what they think is morally correct. Again, it is fine if you want to share your thoughts on something. But I hope no one comes after those who do enjoy the au. I haven’t seen that happen yet, I’m hoping it doesn’t. But the generalization about what it says about those who enjoy the au doesn’t sit right with me. For reasons like I mentioned above, about worrying it could turn into attempted censoring. Especially if anyone tries to get others to agree to black-and-white thinking about what they think is true. That could easily turn into justification to harassment, which I have seen in fandom spaces before. Particularly with anti-proshippers.
There may be valid criticisms to this au concept, but that doesn’t mean everyone who is a fan likes it for the same reasons. Let me address some of what I’ve seen though. The joking about Odysseus being a Manwhore coming from homophobia. Yeah, that’s possible (although personally I feel like a homophobe is more likely to not even mention gay things.) I don’t think that’s always the case though. I know there was one animatic I saw, the first thing I saw for the au, that had a joke in it that I didn’t like. I don’t judge this creator, and in fact it’s a common joke I’ve seen. Particularly with people wishing they didn’t see something. It just doesn’t vibe with me. In no way do I think that those who say such jokes have something wrong with them. People have different senses of humor and I think some use such jokes as a way to cope.
Anyways, I think some of the humor more comes from how unexpected it would be. I mean, we have a war captain facing foes who instead of choosing to fight goes for seducing them. It’s certainly interesting. I know some of the jokes come from the others not involved in the coupling being just shocked or grossed out. I think that more comes from like not wanting to see someone else talk about or get busy with another? I mean, some of these men probably consider each other to be like brothers. I imagine that would be weird. I think homosexuality wasn’t taboo in ancient Greece, I’m not entirely sure though I may need to do more research on that. So there could be some homophobia to the jokes, but I don’t think that’s the case for everyone. It certainly wasn’t for me. It could also be lgbt+ fans wanting to see more gay stuff in the story. Gay shipping isn’t uncommon after all.
I don’t think everyone who talks about the Manwhore au has no problem joking about sa. There can be many reasons why someone may enjoy a concept in media. You don’t know. Like how women are criticized for rape fantasies. I watched a documentary about sex once (I can’t remember which one this was in now) and there was a whole segment about the rape fantasy, discussing why this is an appeal to some women. It did not mean these women want to be raped of course. Part of it could come from a culture of feeling pressure to not experience any sexual feelings, so the scenario allowed them to experience something without feeling guilty about it. There isn’t always a clear explanation for why someone can find something sexy.
I think this started as a joke, but I wouldn’t be surprised if there were some who wanted something sexy in their Epic fan experience. I mean, having read the Odyssey in school (twice actually) I did not expect I would want to see Odysseus in such a scenario. But then I saw one sexy fanart of him with others and cough I ended up liking it more than I expected. Those who have seen my reblogs on this tag know heh.
There’s also the infidelity notion. I feel like given the situation, Penelope would understand. I also saw some comments that they could be poly, which is a concept I like for this. I’ve also seen mention that human relationships with gods have ended up tragically for the humans involved. I don’t think everyone who listens to Epic knows about that. I didn’t. But again, this goes back to it being fantasy. People enjoying picturing it the way they want to. It doesn’t have to be accurate to the myths. It’s fanfiction/au.
I think the infidelity notion to it didn’t bother me as much as others because in the original, he wasn’t faithful. Sorry for Odyssey spoilers I guess. Anyways, I was already used to him being a cheater. Although the one with Circe may match more with the coercion along the lines of ‘sleep with me for your crew’. The knife that’s been shown in some animatics wasn’t in the original. It’s been a while since I’ve read it so I’m not entirely sure about how that went down.
Referring back to if Odysseus wants it even if he was the one who offered (sorry if I’m all over the place with this, I have a lot of thoughts.) Seducing foes doesn’t necessarily mean he didn’t want it. There’s a character in a Sanders Sides roleplay I was in named Remy (Sleep), whose rp version was created/and played by the wonderful @queroze , who was proclaimed by them to be a manslut. His go-to to get out of situations, if he saw it was a fit strategy, was to seduce. Sure, he got into situations that weren’t great, but often he was the active one in the seducing. I wouldn’t say his go-to being to seduce meant it wasn’t always consensual. In fact, there’s many descriptions and some statements from Que themselves saying Remy loved bringing pleasure to his partners.
Then there’s the mention of the unlikeliness of the scenario actually happening. I don’t think this matters that much to be honest. It’s fandom enjoyment. Who cares if people want to enjoy something that doesn’t seem likely in canon? I personally couldn’t see seduction working, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t find the concept entertaining. Sure people shouldn’t insist it could occur to the creators. But aside from that, it doesn’t affect you. Enjoying fan spaces is way more fun if we let things stay peaceful.
I kinda want to write a fanfic now that adjusts to some of the critiques I’ve seen of this au. I know I said I probably wouldn’t, but I got inspired while planning this heh.
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CAUTION: This post contains spoilers from Mario and Luigi: Brothership. If you haven’t beaten the game yet, don’t read beyond the cut
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I feel like not enough people have talked about the symbolism and themes within Brothership
I noticed it as I played. It unfurled before me… and I couldn’t help but be absolutely impressed by it. This is by far the most in depth M&L story I’ve ever seen
I would also like to mention that this is based on my own personal interpretations/opnions
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— Theming and Symbolism in Characters and the World —
Most M&L games have a theme to the world we visit, this is most noticeable in Superstar Saga and Dream Team. Superstar Saga’s theme is humor and laughter, while Dream Team’s is sleep.
Both games have their own original species to match with these themes. The Beanish and Pi’illos. There’s not much to it other than that. There isn’t any reason for why these peoples were chosen, outside of theming
Brothership feels the same way for a time. It doesn’t seem like there’s a reason for why the Concordians are all cords or outlets outside of theming… but there’s more to it
Late into the story, Bonds become more prevalent in the plot. Yes, it’s a pun, but it’s also symbolic. Bonds refer to relationships between characters, Mario and Luigi included. Connections (also a pun) are part of this symbolism as well
Connections and Bonds are generally the same thing. And they both add a symbolic reason as to why the people behind Brothership chose for the Concordians to be plugs or outlets or cords
Not only is it theming, it’s also symbolism
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— The Power of Friendship, but cooler —
“The Power of Friendship” is a trope that’s used a lot in shows, generally being used for younger audiences. The trope has been clowned on due to how corny it can be
I will not deny that Brothership is in the same boat… but what makes it feel unique is that the “power of friendship” trope, in this game’s instance, has symbolism
As mentioned before, Bonds are symbolic of relationships between characters. This makes the story feel nowhere near as corny or cheesy (Imo) as it would if it *didn’t* have this symbolism
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— In-depth characters… the Bros. included —
Most M&L games don’t go too far in depth with their characters. Not that they always need to… but character depth is always welcome
Brothership goes far beyond what any game in the series has done, and gives most of the main cast some level of depth. They were given more to enhance their characters, and make them more interesting
This also goes back to Bonds, which also allow for more interesting characters. Willma and her family, Chilliam and Burnadette, Connie and Cozette, Junior and Buddy, and the IDLE Crew (plus Peach and Starlow) are all notable examples… and so are the Bros
M&L’s whole gimmick is fixating on the Bros. and their brotherly bond. It isn’t just the original characters that are tied into the story by Bonds, it’s also Mario and Luigi. Part of the whole plot is their powerful bond, and how easily they are able connect other Bonds
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— An Unexpected, yet welcome, Turn of Events —
This isn’t necessarily a theme, but something I thought was really cool and eye-opening
Something that I didn’t expect to do was visit the Extension Corps when gathering Bonds… because why would you? Why would you go back to the people who wanted you gone and ask for their Bond Power? Why would the plot have you do that?
The Great Conductor says that Bonds don’t just come from good people… he’s right. It’s not just good guys who have bonds. It was a point in the story I didn’t expect at all, but gladly welcomed. It’s honestly very profound and bold to me
When we go back to the Extension Corps, we see them grow as characters. After the Bros. walloped them, they went back to Slippenglide and reformed, being tired of doing evil
Never did I expect them to have any ounce of depth…. But they do, and it’s great :)
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— A Combo of Nature and Tech —
This is more on the smaller side, but I thought it was cool
Brothership combines tech (plugs, outlets) with nature (plants, trees), two things that don’t necessarily go together, but makes them compatible. They aren’t always used in positive ways either
Connie and Cozette utilize nature in a positive and healthy way, protecting and caring for the Uni-Tree, while Reclusa does the opposite
Reclusa summons the flowers that stick onto people’s heads and creates their own isolated paradise. He creates the Soli-Tree. I may be over analyzing this, but I like to think this ties into real life, in a way
Nature, or specifically plant growth, can be both positive and negative. Not all plants are good for organic life, some are harmful or deadly, much like the Doom Blooms or Weeping Reclusa
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This isn’t really too organized, but I just really wanted to discuss all of this and get it out of my head
Thank you for coming to my silly Ted-Talk :)
#super mario#mario and luigi#mario and luigi brothership#mario and luigi brothership spoilers#mario#luigi#willma#chilliam#burnadette#connie#cozette#bowser jr#buddy#idle#princess peach#starlow#extension corps#the great conductor#snoutlet#reclusa
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Calypso vs Antinous: A Tale of Two Villains
I know this is such a weird topic for me to come back for after not blogging for months, especially I’ve never spoken on this fandom here, as opposed to TikTok. But precisely BECAUSE tiktok is so limiting, even if you make various videos on a topic, someone won’t have all the context and the comment system of that app is pure ass so here I am
Calypso and Antinous are two (out of three!) of the MAJOR villains in the Wisdom Saga, however, both these villains have produced polarizing discourse that has fascinated yet confounded me. On Calypo’s end, she is a villain who many are made upset by when she is interpreted as the villain she is (in varying degrees). On Antinous’s end, he is a villain who many are made upset by when he is interpreted as anything BUT the villain he is (in various extremes). What on earth happened here?
I’ll try to dissect what has transpired as i have come to understand both situations.
PLEASE try to read through the end, but if you like, you are also more than welcome to just focus on one section if you don’t care for both discourses or how i think one affects the other. I totally get it. KEEP IN MIND, that i might speak about something you haven’t PERSONALLY seen, but as i often say in fandom, just because YOU didn’t see it, doesn’t mean it didn’t HAPPEN. It adds context to why/how certain fans are reacting as they are. You could be in one camp, and never have seen what the other camp has, so at any point where youre reading and saying to yourself “is this a thing that happened?” Consider that it did indeed, happen, and you are welcome to expand your knowledge on the subject.
ANY comments that go “you have no idea what your talking about/this isn’t true/i’ve never seen this/when did this happen(sarcastically)” will not be answered and you will be blocked, because it is clear you are not actually open to discussion. You’ve made up your mind about these characters and topics, and my time, at least, is valuable.
GENUINE questions like “I didn’t know this/when did this happen (genuine)/can you explain this point more” are more than welcome. I will absolutely entertain character interpretation as well, so long as we’re not trying to “convince” one another, as that isn’t the point of this post. These are two villains who i find fascinating and am wondering why are being treated so differently in discourse spaces.
For Calypso:
I truly and HONESTLY believe that because Calypso is a unique (and lovable! Mind you!) villain, it had led to many of her newer fans to feel uncomfortable with her role in the story. I have seen numerous sides of her discourse and have come with a few iron-clad rules: it is ONLY acceptable to call someone out if they are harassing Wangui, calypo’s VA (which has NOT happened as i am writing this out) OR if an anti-calypso comes into SOMEONE ELSE’s post saying anything like “if you like calypso then you condone her actions” because as what we sane people know, that is just a silly fallacy, OR if they start shit in a cosplayers/fanfic writer/fanartists comment section. ASIDE from these instances, i will be speaking on what none sense has transpired about how Calypso is portrayed in the Musical within her first song, and her future song, because BOTH have been used for utter bias.
A few things to debunk:
FIRST Calypso is NOT cursed to fall in love with anyone who comes across her island. That is a Percy Jackson ONLY addition that has no bearings on her actions in the musical or the original poem.
ALSO though Calypso CANONICALLY RAPES Odysseus for seven years in the original poem, the CHILDREN from that abuse only really exist in secondary sources/works. They NOT in the original poem.
Having said that:
The Ambiguity of Calypso’s actions in both of her songs means that everyone is right when they speculate on what she has done. Odysseus was trapped on her island against HIS will for seven years. He is canonically seen refusing her advances, trying to kill himself, and begging her to let him go and leave him alone. These are UNDISPUTED facts. As such, regardless of how YOU personally choose to interpret Calypso actions, she will always have a CANONICAL victim in the musical. I feel people are forgetting Odysseus when they speak on Calypso and that’s the whole point of her existence in the poem and the musical.
This leads directly into WHY there has been arguments about Calypso’s character. In the POEM, she very much sexually assaults Odysseus for seven long years. He is seen crying nightly and begging to be free. In the MUSICAL, Jorge has decided to leave the situation ambiguous - which, i have seen, does not sit well with current fandom culture. NEW fans of Calypso seem to be very adamant about NOT interpreting Calypso as a rapist, in levels that range for they’re just not comfy with it so decided not to head canon her as such, to other very concerningly speaking about rape survivors in such a way to justify liking a villain when you dont HAVE to justify liking a villain at any point at all ever.
Let’s break it down.
Those who just don’t like the idea of Calypso being a rapist in the MUSICAL are valid. It’s very easy to block and avoid those who have chosen to explore this aspect of her in the musical because they can and are allowed to. I am very pro-finding a space in fandom where you can talk about Calypso without HAVING to mention she might have raped someone. She’s still a villain for having kept Odysseus captive for seven years, but it’s not important. You are more than allowed to love villains, and without the rape aspect, Calypso’s villainy boils down to her physiological and emotionally torturing Odysseus while physically kidnapping him. That’s still ALOT of bad stuff to unpack, if you so want to. You could also not want to! It doesn’t hurt anyone, and anyone who says it does is not being intellectually honest.
The PROBLEM that I’m seeing, is that many of her newer fans…DONT want Calypso to be seen as a villain. At all. Which…is not how fandom works, I’m sorry to say.
While some EPIC fans have interpreted Calypso of being manipulative / selfish even in their most sympathetic analysis of the story (and the current song), others are treating these interpretation as wholly incorrect and somehow a form of harassment. The main caveat to this reaction appears to be, as TikTok puts it, “That Calypso DOESN’T SA Odysseus on the musical”
As we have pointed out, Calypso canonically rapes Odysseus in the poem, while it’s ambiguous in the musical. As we have ALSO pointed out, the ambiguity of the musical allow ALL INTERPRETATIONS to be correct. Something about the RAPE aspect of Calypso’s characterization in this musical, however, is the primary reason this discourse has happened.
Now, as i have said earlier. You are in your RIGHT to not head canon Calypso has a rapist in the musical. In the same vein others also have a RIGHT to head canon Calypso AS a rapist in the musical. But from what I’ve seen, it’s when others interpret Calypso as a rapist that newer Calypso fans leave comments about they’re not “interpreting the story correctly” and not “Judging calypso based on Jorge’s vision” and at first i found it funny…now it’s a bit concerning.
There are two instances that come to mind. One tiktoker made a video where she was in tears saying that it made HER SAD that people were “judging Calypso wholly based on outside sources material” which is disingenuous. As i have said before, even without the RAPE aspect of Calypso, which i will go further into what her newer fans consider “rape”, she is still an antagonist within the musical - she is a villain who keeps Odysseus against his will. To claim that they are calling her a villain for that reason alone is a blatant and useless addition to the discourse. I did not care for it at all. It would have been MUCH MORE constructive for this tiktoker to say that even though Calypso is a villain, the sexual assault is up to individual interpretation, and as all interpretations are valid, it’s better to find people who agree with your head canons rather than start fights with people who don’t share yours. This tiktoker very poorly worded the discourse as a one-sided thing where one side is wrong, and that is simply not true.
ANOTHER tiktoker, who wisely turned off comments because such discussions are impossible on the app, worryingly claimed that a line in Not Sorry for Loving You was absolute PROOF that Calypso did not “rape” Odysseus so it was wrong to interpret her as such, because, and this is a loose quotation “i don’t think Jorge would make Odysseus say something like that HAD Calypso done that to him” which unfortunately leaves fandom discourse into REAL WORLD victim discourse. Holy shit. The line she is referring to is when Odysseus calms Calypso down when she is in the middle of explaining her actions by saying “Calypso i love you, but not the way you want me to” to this tiktoker, it seems illogical for a rape victim to every say these kinds of things to their rapist…which is….NOT it. At all. Fiction, as beautiful as it is, is meant for you to QUESTION “huh…how would this impossible fictional scenario work? What makes this compelling?” It is NOT meant for you to attribute your REAL WORLD assumptions onto a FICTIONAL SCENARIO in order to justify you liking a villain character when you dont HAVE to justify it. You can like Calypso! It’s only weird when you make real-world comparisons like this because a rape victim can and HAS said as much and even more to their rapists in known history. *bonks you* dont do what this person did! Fiction allows you to explore situation that would be traumatizing outside of it in as safe and consensual way! You CANNOT and should NOT ascribe your personal biases on sensitive topics for FICTIONAL characters. That’s not how this works. “real victim wouldn’t x, so fictional wouldn’t y” is a ludicrous statement! You can’t back it up with facts! “Fictional victim does x, so i wonder if there ever would be a situation where a real victim would do y, and would like educate myself on the topic” IS what fiction was made for! OPENing your mind, not closing it for stupid reasons.
But it got me thinking. BECAUSE these fans anchor their arguments on the rape of Odysseus, even when they themselves DONT consider it, what exactly do they consider rape, and why is that ONE act Calypso may or may not do the ONLY reason to call her a villain when she is one, regardless.
Well, I’ve seen a lot of back and forth. Some anti-calypso’s are okay with the idea that Calypso is more of a “kissy-face” monster, a silly villain who, having no concept of what actual love is and what your supposed to do with someone you love, thinks hugging and kissing is the only thing on the table. It still makes this version of Calypso something of a sex pest and is still in line with sexual assault as we see Odysseus is miserable. The gravity of the situation is based entirely on funny fanfics to Odysseus canonically trying to kill himself because of Calypso’s affection. This interpretation (shockingly enough) is also hated by some new Calypso fans.
Because from what i have gathered. “SA” as used in TikTok, had been boiled down to a literal forced insertion of Odysseus’s dick in Calypso’s vagina. Not the literal words “sexual assault” which is an umbrella term for multiple things. But in this discourse “SA” has JUST been used for the ACT of rape itself. That is what new Calypso fans think is criminal. That is what they entirely base her villainy on. Because we will NEVER get confirmation on whether this happened, it’s impossible to engage with some of the newer fans, who dislike attributing Calypso with the villain title because of this one thing and this one thing alone. Any other line, from Calypso saying “and I’m sorry if i pushed you, or if i came on too strong” in her next song, or even her saying “in bed we will climb” is, for some reason, not grounds for others to be allowed to interpret her as, at the very least, assaulting Odysseus physically and sexually in a way without having to have actually raped him. It boggles my mind. Truly. But every argument i have seen has boiled down to the newer fans saying “welllllll, we dont know the context, and Odysseus said —“ when i have already explained that none of that matters. All interpretations are valid. You CANNOT say with certainty that she did or didn’t rape Odysseus. That’s the POINT. You can’t PROVE either, stop TRYING to, it’s YOUR choice and your interpretation can be backed by lyrics/official animatics, but it is hardly an absolute.
It has become a GROWING problem that in videos where Calypso is portrayed negatively, there are at least a dozen newer calypso fans who have to bring up how she is sympathetic, and therefore, not a villain. Which is not true. She is the MOST compelling villain in the epic musical, thus far.
These “fans” say that she absolutely didn’t rape Odysseus which is theory, not fact. And not a theory that can become fact. In the same way that saying she absolutely did rape is can not become fact. They appear to believe everything outside of this hypothetical act, nothing else she does is deserving of her title as a villain, and start arguments in non discourse posts about all the ways she’s sympathetic when it goes hand in hand with what makes her a compelling villain antagonist.
There’s also a newer cope saying that it’s all Zeus’s fault anyway, which has NO bearings on the conversation as, again, despite Zeus being a dick and allowing Odysseus live while not necessarily enabling him returning to Ithaca, it’s still up to Calypso on how she acts towards HER captive. And she straight up chooses violence lmao. Athena asks for “Devine intervention” to an impossible situation, regardless of if it was Zeus’s actions that led to it, it’s also up to him to “untie apprehensions” because Calypso, being a goddess, has complete control over whether Odysseus can leave and SHE won’t. She has to be ORDERD to. By a HIGHER power. Zeus.
Such argumentations as “well if YOU were in Calypso’s situation, wouldn’t you also do the same” are useless fallacies to get into, because you are NOT a goddess who owns an island and is in possession of a man who does not love you. Even if you were, guess what, it still makes you the antagonist. A villain. A knowing one or not.
In fact, since I LIKE interpretations that Calypso isn’t psychologically torturing Odysseus ON PURPOSE, i go as far as to say that her being a genuine goddess who wants love is in fact…..so much more painful, narratively. Because that means she is INCAPABLE of ever being a good person. Her loneliness and fear of being unloved makes her utterly blind to Odysseus’s misery. She HEARS him saying constantly that he misses his family, that all he hears are screams, and that SHE doesn’t know him, but she in turn CANNOT get passed this because she is, at her core, unable to, and thus accidentally triggers him constantly, is delusional about her island being paradise, AND convinces herself that her love is real (when it is not) and that Oddy will love her back if she keeps trying.
THAT is what you call a compelling villain!
As in all Calypso stories. There is NEVER a moment of clarity where Calypso realizes “if i actually love this person, i should let him go” in the musical HERMES is tasked in telling her to let him go. And she, as in all her other stories, goes on a tirade to explain/justify her actions, however you wish to see her being manipulative or honest. Regardless of how you choose to SEE calypso, at the end of the day, she has NO RIGHT to be upset at Odysseus because he was her captive. And REGARDLESS of whether Odysseus’s words are interpreted as him forgiving her, or just placating her, at the end of the day, he is her victim and she ends her next song upset that he is willingly leaving her once he got the chance. With absolutely no hope of him returning her feelings. It’s not his job to make her feel better, she IS an antagonist, and you are allowed to love her no matter how that might upset others. It is ONLY a problem when you take it to such extremes that you are in other peoples comments acting as if Calypso is a real person who needs defending. You are more than in your right to block people who come into YOUR videos accusing you of somehow being a bad person because you like a bad person. That’s not how fiction works.
Once again. My analysis of the Calypso debacle is that for some, calling Calypso a villain upsets them. Because they like her, and they are uncomfortable with the idea of liking a villain. This is a personal grievance that shouldn’t boil into fandom. Know your truth, have fun. You CAN make silly calypso videos. Many have. Her song is a bop, the meaning of the song is hilariously dark compared to the composition. Jorge did his job VERY well. Too well, that the idea of liking Calypso feels either / or when it’s not. TRUST that i would not be on the side of anyone who says “if you like calypso, youre evil”, but I HAVE seen a pattern that because Calypso is likable, than several people have made it their confused mission to tell everyone who is “mean to her” that “if you DISLIKE calypso, YOU are evil”. That’s bizarre to me. Calypso does enough evil actions in the musical to warrant that title regardless of the reasons for her actions, whether she is being purposely malicious or unconsciously so due to her lack of socialization. Being weird about real life SA survivors for a fictional character is never acceptable. For or against Calypso, whether she is a rapist or not, it is up to YOU to find like minded people who share your interpretation, not to argue with people who disagree with you in their own space. She isn’t real. Get over it.
ANYONE WHO HARASSES WAGNUI, COSPLAYERS, OR GOES INTO POSITIVE CALYPSO INTERPRETATION SPACES TO BE PURPOSELY MEAN* ARE WRONG. Otherwise. Leave them alone, they are as valid as you are. “Defending” a character is a waste of time when you could be creating for them. Calypso is a compelling villian antagonist regardless of how uwu or vile you choose to make her. Thus is the beauty of fiction.
(*purposely mean, would, logically, be someone calling you an idiot or a rape apologist for headcanoning her in a positive way. The ideal interaction with a negative calypso interpreter would be “i dont see her this way, but i understand/like your headcanon”)
WHICH BRINGS US TO Antinous:
Hilariously enough. Antinous has the complete INVERSE problem as Calypso, which was also detailed in her section for fairness sake at multiple points, and this problem is much easier to understand. Antinous is a villian antagonist in the musical Epic, and in his debut in the wisdom saga, he is shown (like calypso) to be in direct opposition to Telemachus and Penelope’s goal.
He alludes to sexual assault much more clearly than calypso. He calls Penelope a tramp to her son’s face AND suggests he let them into her room “so [they] can have fun with her” which is in the same vein as calypso saying “soon in bed we will climb” to Odysseus later on that “you (Odysseus) are mine all mine” in her own song. Like calypso, it is told to us that Antinous has been having this kind of vibe for FIVE YEARS* (a fan pointed this out to me! read here🙏🏼) as opposed to calypso’s seven years. Everyone is, usually, in agreement that Antinous is a villain in the wisdom saga and in the overall Epic musical.
Antinous’s VA is ON TikTok, and has spoken about how happy he is that fans consider him a talented person who did a spectacular rendition of such a villainous character. AND YET.
Inversely from what we saw in the Calypso section, where some of her fans are against the notion of her being portrayed as the antagonist she is, for Antinous we have MANY fans claiming that others are not ALLOWED to portray him as anything BUT an antagonist. Unlike with Calypso, where people circularly argue that her allusions to sexual assault are “too ambigous” and lead to much senseless debate on whether you’re “allowed” to like her or call her a villian, with ANTINOUS, there is this claim that he ABSOLUTELY is alluded to sexual assault and therefore, cannot be liked or treated as anything other than a villain.
As i have discussed AT LENGTH in Calypso’s section, this argumentation is pure fallacy.
There have been NUMEROUS thirst videos that have rightfully said that DESPITE the actions of the character, they still think Antinous is hot and likable (the Gaston affect, if you will). Even WITHOUT the disclaimer, it is OF COURSE understood that Antinous fans are NOT rape apologists. That is a ridiculous assumption that serves only to kill any interpretation that someone else can rightfully have.
It’s utterly devoid of nuance or actual knowledge of how to play within fandom and interact w characters.
There have been SEVERAL posts calling Antinous fans delusional for liking him and “reminding” the fandom that he is a bad guy. This serves no purpose and is utterly useless to the discourse. Antinous being a bad guy is not debated. This is factual. It doesn’t (or shouldn’t, because we cannot speak in absolutes) hurt anyone’s feelings to see an Antinous videos depicting him as the villain he is. Like with Calypso it is ONLY acceptable to call someone out if they are harassing Ayron Alexander, Antinous’s VA (which has NOT happened as i am writing this out) OR if an anti-Antinous comes into SOMEONE ELSE’s post saying anything like “if you like Antinous then you condone his actions” because as what we sane people know, that is just a silly fallacy, OR if they start shit in a cosplayers/fanfic writer/fanartists comment section.
Otherwise. Who cares that someone is saying Antinous is a villain? Block the no fun police and enjoy analysis from others who choose to see him purely as what he is, if you want. If you dont, block them to, it’s your space. You have a RIGHT to headcanon Antinous however you want, even make up AUs for him where he’s nice or lives and gets a happy ending, SO LONG AS you’re not in other people’s posts going actually Antie is my uwu child and he did nothing wrong. Cuz then youre just being dumb. And annoying. Fandom is already impatient with genuine disagreement, being a smart ass gets your head dunked in a toilet. I used to think this was common sense.
(And in case you didn’t read the Calypso section, or didn’t see enough of it there, this IS the appropriate response to people who address newer fans of her as rape apologists too, its in her section, i just also thought it was important to touch on the stranger phenomena of her other fans refusing to call her a villain because it makes them personally uncomfortable - it’s very interesting as Calypso is a female antagonist while Antinous being a male antagonist is being treated very differently for the same subject. In any case, it’s a disservice to either character and Jorge’s narrative to get upset about the very real fact that BOTH of these characters are villain antagonists.)
The very CURRENT discourse surrounding Antinous is that he was recently shipped with Telemachus.
The animator for Apollo’s section of God Games was harassed to such a point that she had to make a public apology regarding her ALTERNATE UNIVERSE scenario. And i, personally, think that’s bullshit.
There have been accusations that she was being insensitive to sexual assault survivors, and that she made a dark joke, all of which she addressed in her apology IN ADDITION to her explaining that she is ALSO a survivor of child sexual assault. She took down her work. DESPITE all of this, there are still others who continue to harass her, and claim that they dont want “a rape creator” in THEIR fandom. To those people: you don’t speak for any of us. In the same way you can claim not to believe that the animator is a survivor, i have no reason to consider your concerns in any way shape or form as being in service of victims. It is absolutely not your call, when blocking and scrolling on will ALWAYS be an option for YOU.
Even in the event someone writes Antonio’s fan fiction keeping his canon personality and characterization in a non-canon divergent way it is not grounds to harass people.
In addition to this animator, there have been SEVERAL Antinous shippers who have expressed disappointment that she was essentially harassed into a corner, as they also liked the ship and the AU she created. These people are NOT “weird” they are allowed to express themselves creatively, and if you disagree, dont even bother with leaving any sort of response — i wont read it, my time is important. Stay in your echo chamber. Even if it wasn’t an AU, and someone wants to write for Antinous as he is in the narrative, they are more than allowed to do so. Dark fiction isn’t going to traumatize you or give you cooties. Grow up.
I am MUCH more willing to ride with Antinous shippers than i ever will be with fans who attempt to control how a character is interpreted by others. Because to ship Antinous with anyone, AU or otherwise, you have to have an UNDERSTANDING of why this would be a compelling thing to write/make fanart for. He is an evil character, and it would be FASCINATING to see him in fictional scenarios that (like in the calypso section) lead us to as WHY this would be an appealing and interesting take on someone. It’s OKAY to do it in fiction. He isn’t REAL. It’s not hurting EVERYONE. And more so than with calypso, it IS understood that Antinous HAS victims in Penelope and Telemachus There’s no senseless debate on what he is, a villain, no one is arguing he is a uwu babygirl so please sympathize w him, it’s inherently understood even among his FANS.
This is why find Antonio’s and Calypso’s discourses so polarizing. Because no one is getting offended or arguing that Antinous only acts villainously because of some tragic backstory or sympathetic reason. It would be absurd to.
That’s the appeal of a lovable villain. Because like Calypso, Antinous IS lovable, but in such a different way that you have fans treating both characters as if they’re polar opposite when at the very LEAST, there’s on the same bracket, just different ends of them. Telemachus/Penelope and Odysseus’s plights are being MIRRORED in parallel.
THAT is what floors me about these two discourses. That they are functionally THE SAME yet are being treating as if they aren’t. I’m positive that there is an Antinous fan who detests Calypso in the same way there is a Calypso fan who detests Antinous. These are called biases. Once you KNOW your own bias, it is up to YOU to act right according to them.
You are responsible for your OWN fyp.
The Epic fandom had yet to experience such backwards discourse as this, and I wouldn’t expect Jorge or any of the VAs to dignify such trivial discourse with a response. If you’re the type to bring it up to them, you’re being awful. The popular fandom Epic tiktokers are already way too involved as it is. And even they are getting things wrong.
It almost feels remiss to say that in the NARRATIVE of the musical, both Calypso and Antinous are villian antagonists, while outside of the narrative they become dolls you can play with however you like, so long as we are not in each others comments being obtuse. I don’t expect any of my essay to even make it to a larger part of the fandom. But i HAD to get my ideas written down, because if you don’t see someone else connecting the dots you have, you have to present them yourself. Very “can’t we all just get along?” But hopefully, not as insufferable nor one-sides as others might have been. I tried to bring up ideas/points that i have not seen discussed about these two villains and why they seem to connect and go hand in hand.
Why is Calypso, as a female antagonist, given more grace than Antinous, a male antagonist, who is very firmly given none at all. It very well could be just how they were presented, and if so, ask yourself WHY these villains were presented so differently. What purpose do they serve? What are they trying to accomplish? These are questions more suited for actual fandom collaboration that is being drowned out by circular arguements. It feels like homework, instead of knee-jerk reacting to interpretations unlike your own.
To ME, these two characters are two sides of the same coin. (though I DO think it’s funny that the NEUTRAL phrase to refer to either character is “I hate them BUT” because in reasonable fandoms, this is understood inherently….but in this fandom such decorum seems to be lost? For some reason?? Wisdom saga has brought out a lack of wisdom, I fear.) This is the kind of purity culture that suggest you can’t LIKE a character of their a villain, so you go out of your way to argue they aren’t, or that no one else should like them: that’s bonkers. You might disagree and it might even upset you, but that’s a you problem to have.
Having said that, and if you are POSITIVE that you want to engage in conversation with me, you are welcome to do so.
#epic the musical#epic the wisdom saga#epic calypso#epic antinous#epic telemachus#epic odysseus#purity culture#the way calypso and atinous would both have identical sections if not for the fact some of her new stans refuse to accept she’s a villain#a hot villain!!!#bonkers to yonkers how liking villains is still a discourse issue lmao
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Ok so we get this
and this
And I proceed to spiral about colour theory and costume theory and end up writing and expansion to this post I made about Buck in yellow ochre!!! Sorry y'all, you know what that means - my unhinged colour theory and costume meta's are Back!!!
Lets start by revisiting all of Bucks previous yellow ochre wearing shenanigans!
3x06 the yellow ochre sweater he wears when he gets sent home by Bobby - this does after we see Buck and Eddie making up with each other - a moment when we see Buck learning more about himself and growing (read becoming less self-centred and understanding the concept of being part of a team and recognising that he needs to be better about stepping in with Eddie!)
4x02 - Yellow ochre jumper - first in a video chat with Maddie, Chim and Albert, but then more importantly, when he is in his therapy session with dr Copeland - the whole ‘I hide my true feelings from others’ moment - yet another moment of Buck recognising something about himself. I think this is the most key scene in Bucks yellow ochre wearing - more on that in a bit.
4x03 Bucks yellow ochre t-shirt - a t-shirt that matches the shade of the jumper from above, and a moment when Buck confesses to Maddie that he’s in therapy - about being sad and lonely and wanting to be ‘finer’
4x04 - the yellow knit sweater from 3x06 is back (yes it is the same sweater) and this is when Buck has his entire life upended and he finds out about Daniel (kicking us into Buck begins)
4x11 - Buck talks to Maddie and Josh about Sue’s hit and run, then talks to Taylor about Sue. This one is a much brighter yellow than the ochres we’ve seen up to now, but I’m including it because I think its relevant to Bucks arc here (also because it connects into the next time we see Buck wearing yellow - the will scene) the concept of being hit with information that leads to Bucks growth and the nature of most hit and runs not being solved, the perpetrator never being caught and therefore not getting closure on something (this is super relevant I promise!)
Then we have 4x14 and two yellow ochre tops - the first is the sweater, this one is trending more towards orange brown, but its still in the ochre wheelhouse! this oe is all about communication - mostly at Buck - Taylor telling him how stupid he was for climbing the crane, receiving a phonemail from Ana to tell him Eddie is awake, facilitating communication between Eddie and Chris and then Buck communication himself - thinking it would’ve been better if he had been shot. Directly communicating to the audience (as much as Eddie) the inner monologue of Bucks own opinion of the point of his existence.
Then we get the beloved will scene and Buck wearing a yellow ochre shirt, still lighter than the other yellow ochre we’d seen up to this point, with the exception of the previous one which is brighter still. again this is mostly about people communicating at Buck rather than him being the communicator - much like with the previous Jumper. It somewhat plays into the concept of Buck being a passive part of his life rather than actively living it - Kinda hard to explain at this point without the context of the costumes from s5&6. I also want to point out Taylor is in that dark green again here - in the scene when Buck opens the door to the Diaz house.
5x03 gives us Buck in that same shade of yellow ochre (bear in mind we haven’t seen him in any other colour between the will reveal and this scene (beyond uniform!) and here we have Buck pushing Eddie and communicating without actually giving much of himself away - yes he uses himself as an example, but he doesn’t actually open up about himself all that much (this is important - its not the time for that and it provides space for Buck to continue his internal monologue about his self worth) after this he goes home to his loft and we get him communication to a Taylor who isn’t actually present in the space - a symbolic scene that shows that he gets just as much from her absence as her presence (a play on the idea that Buck can communicate better with her when she isn’t actually present compared with when she is - its a juxtaposition of the scene from earlier when they were in bed together and she didn’t listen to anything he was saying, or his wants/needs)
5x04 a scene at the Buckley-Han apartment where Buck isn’t communicating with Chim - Chim is very much communication with Buck about his despair over Maddie leaving - Buck obviously knows where Maddie is at this point, but he diocesan’t take the opportunity to communicate effectively with Chim. so This is yet another example of Buck failing to communicate, while some one around him is clearly communicating and this scene has the addition of secrecy thrown into the mix.
Then we have 5x14 - this one is a bit less obvious - its the yellow ochre and black plaid jacket - its an outlier in that its not solid yellow ochre, but it is again a scene where we get communication - this time BUck is actually the one to do some communicating, but like pretty much always, we don’t get him pushing too much and we see him continuing to deflect from making things about himself - he’s desperate to talk about the shooting and its impact on him, but Eddie resists and Buck backs off. the check here is a nice addition because it shows the concept of cross purposes, but also there is less yellow than in other outfits - the black seems to be ‘devouring’ the yellow - almost like a play on the idea that this was Bucks one big chance to communicate, but he doesn’t take it.
That is the last time we see Buck wearing yellow ochre until the end of season 6 - 6x15 and his date with Natalia to be precise! we’re back to that same shade of yellow ochre and once again we have Buck communicating - but its very much playing into what Natalia what to hear. I don’t doubt that BUck wants to talk about his death and resurrection, but we don’t actually see the conversation beyond the superficial overtures Buck makes. This plays into the suggestion that its about him trying to impress Natalia rather than actually about what Buck needs or wants to say. Its once again Buck communicating without actually communicating. something Eddie picks up on in the later graveyard scene and tries to provide the space for him to open up - which Buck doesn’t take.
The theme continues with the the next Buck/Natalia date in 6x17 - yellow ochre once again, this time an open shirt - again its that same shade, and we see a continuation of the Buck communicate via deflection technique he employs - this scene, like his previous date with Natalia, is more about her and the writers showing us her hang ups/ insecurities than it is about Bucks - beyond showing us that they aren’t actually all that compatible - its kind of framed in the same way as his previous relationships (especially Taylor) - Buck playing into what he thinks someone wants him to be rather than being who he actually is.
This concept is something we see in pretty much all of the previous scenes where Buck is wearing Yellow ochre, this desire to be what people need him to be rather than who he actually is. there are a couple of exceptions - the first time we see Buck in yellow ochre is probably the only instance where we see Buck being somewhat honest with himself - there is an element of him playing the role he needs to to win back Eddies friendship, but I think its coming from a genuine place and is born out of a real desire to be better - he really did learn his lesson. The fact that the next time we see the yellow ochre used is in his therapy session scene where he literally states that he hides his true feelings from others is a big giant yellow ochre flag waving around telling us that when we see Buck in yellow ochre he will be playing into that idea - and that’s then how it transpires in every subsequent scene where he is in yellow ochre.
Which brings me to this new still
no one can tell me there isn’t an air of conflict about that scene - the dark cool tone of the image suggests a coolness to the room - that idea of the cold shoulder or the temperature dropping when there is conflict between two people. their body language is also adding to that vibe - Chris turned in on himself, not sat with Buck, the space between them.
Whatever this scene transpires being about, based on what we've seen with Buck wearing yellow ochre, we can assume its going to continue to play into this idea of Buck not being fully truthful with people and fitting into the role he thinks people want him to pay rather than being true to himself.
I do want to add to this theory by looking at Christophers shirt as well. The grey/ yellow combination is a bit reminiscent of Breaking point (the episode that really is the gift that keeps on giving) becasue we get Chris in grey and Eddie in tan - that is yellowish toned whilst not actually being yellow
There isn't a good screenshot of them together, but the placing of Chris and Buck in the new one has echoes of Eddie and Chris in that scene (one that is interestingly enough playing into the idea of changing family dynamics, but also the moment before and the one that happens afterwards at Bucks loft, directly placing Buck into a parental role (as an aside the idea of Buck being a miracle worker plays into the theme of Eddie looking for magic, just saying!))
Anyone want to play a game of whose shirt does this look like??!!!
Oh you do! well what if I leave these two pictures just here...
yes, yes that is a Chris sized version of that shirt - you know the one Buck was wearing when he and Taylor talked about complicated family dynamics and about telling 'other peoples stories because I hate telling my own' you know that scene about playing a part and not being yourself around people you're supposedly close to! Yes That scene - or how about the scene which happens to be the last time we saw Buck in Chris's bedroom, where Buck talks to Eddie about complicated family dynamics, about needing to have the right outfit on for the occasion, the scene where they talk about retirement, oil and Buck is playing with a dinosaur! yeah see where I'm going with this! Chris wearing a grey shirt that similar to Bucks is Paralleling those scenes - so playing into the idea of history or of thing being outdated and needing to change, of dressing for the occasion (an allegory for playing a role - to fit in to whatever environment you're in rather than being your true self) and most importantly of complicated family dynamics - suggesting that there may have been some change in the dyamics - perhaps this will play into the will (also colour paralleling the will scene as Buck is in yellow ochre and the breaking point scene with Eddie in a yellowish colour and Chris in grey) and perhaps Chris discovering Buck would be his guardian in the event Eddie isn't around. I mean we'll have to wait and see for the actual context, but I will eat my hat if the season 7 scene isn't playing into Buckley-Diaz family dynamics in some way!
Back to this still
I keep flip flopping on if its Buck or Bobby, but right now the lack of grey hair is making me lean towards it being Buck.
This is a still of the back of Bucks head from his coma dream for comparison (blurry as hell as he's not in focus but it looks enought like the same shape of hairline and of Olivers ear for me to feel like its more Buck than Bobby!
I think the shirt is what is throwing me off though because its just so not a typical Buck shirt (excepting coma dream Bucks!).
I've gone back through my notes and I just can't find any examples of Buck wearing this kind of patterning or shirt before, the closest we get is that hideous shirt he is wearing at the hospital after Kameron has given birth
The only thing I can do is scream into the void about check theory because check does't bode well for people - they always end up in the middle of the drama (see my check theory posts linked on my pinned post for more) and while they come out the other side (99% of the time) Buck in check for that scene in 6x18 pretty much doomed his relationship with Natalia (its specific to her and not C&K's baby as Buck wasn't wearing it when he delivered it!) and as that shirt in the still is very un Buck like, has not only yellow ochre in it, but also its a white base (and we all know buck in white is a bad sign!!) and its check patterned - my theory is that this scene is connected to Natalia in some way - either Buck is not being true to him self in more than one way - that things are going to/have come to a head for their relationship (my kingdom for a reverse of Buck to Eddie about Ana in 5x03!!!) and lead to a pretty big change in some way (fingers crossed for Buck to end it and then finally break down and deal with his trauma!!!)
Some other things about that shirt - I've brightened it up in the picture below - the colour combination - the green blue and yellow ochre are giving me call backs to coma Buck (another reason I think it might be connected to Bucks unresolved trauma around his death and Eddies absense in his dream)
Then there is the burgundy stripe in combination with Eddies hand placement and the fact Eddie is wearing a denim shirt - its very Tsunami call back (even the white plays into this as well as Buck was in white when he saved Chris) -
I'm quite probably clowning hard at this point, but the fact we've got Eddie in denim again (not something he wears all that often) in a scene where he puts his hand on Bucks shoulder in that way and with his Christopher watch so very prominent - we'll I might be feeling a certain way about it.
It would make sense to play into that story arc - after all - the opening of season 7 is very much centred around a big water based disaster - its got to bring up a few things for the two of them. If it is related, Eddies Denim being darker at this point would be a nice play on things - the idea that there is more deepness - more depth to his relationship with Buck than there was in early season 3 (it even calls back to flash back Eddie in 3x16 - he is wearing dark denim when him and Shannon fight and Chris wakes up)
Ok thats enough rambling from me! Hopefully i have made a tiny bit of sense! of to go back to screaming in the void now!!
tagging a few people who might be interested! @extasiswings @copyninjabuckley @oneawkwardcookie @spotsandsocks @mandzuking17 @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @theladyyavilee @mistmarauder
#I'm being totally fine and normal about this#I missed writing about colour theory and costumes!!#We back baby#kym costume meta#costume spiralling#colour theory#kym colour theory#911 spoilers#911 abc#evan 'buck' buckley#eddie diaz#christopher diaz#is it buck is it bobby? who knows!!#but I think its Buck!#buddie#I'll be over here spiralling!
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Wild Life Fanfic
Hi! This is a story that's rattled around in my brain for the last couple weeks. Before you read, there are a few things to note.
On breaks and in-between sessions, the server is turned to peaceful, all cameras are shut off, and wild cards are deactivated. This is to preserve food and lives. Any lives lost during these times are restored back to the player before the session begins/continues.
Pearl has L.I.M.S. (Lag Induced Muscle Spasms) I seen a post by @hermitcraftheadcanons and they talked about how lag is an illness and how Aussie ping could be like a chronic illness in the Minecraft universe. I took this and ran with it.
These are in fact the characters not content creators. The characters are staying in their Traffic personas during recording but being themselves off camera. This will make more sense as you read.
Nothing happens if they do go out of character, but because the sessions are timed, they need to get as much usable footage as possible.
Enough of the author rambles! Onto the story!
_______________________________________
“So, you two have been going around, mildly making people our enemies and neither of you two are on red yet!” Scott scolds to the two mischief makers in front of him. Pearl rolls her head back, tuning out her teammate’s voice. The session had already been rough for her and now they have a fight to deal with.
“I’m close enough to red to warrant some mischief, and it’s not like everyone’s gonna stay allied to the end anyways.” Pearl states, silently wishing their comms would go off alerting them of the break, until then, they needed to remain in character.
“Still though, we don’t want to be making mo-” Cleo starts before freezing. Pearl mentally readies herself for the onslaught of pain she was about to endure.
“-more enemies.” They finish once the lag spike passes. Pearl leans onto the sheep fence as a sharp stabbing pain shot through her abdomen. Cleo lifts a hand from her hip, before placing it back. Good. Stay in character.
“We’re friends with literally most, if not half, the server. I-I’m sure we can do with some enemies.” The Aussie defends checking the time. Two minutes till break.
“Pearl, making enemies is how we die! And with the wild cards, who knows what kind of things they can do to us!”
“You worry to mu—” Pearl’s voice caught in her throat. Another spike. A sharper pain now.
“Much, Scott.” She finishes, now gripping onto the fence, her nails digging into the wood. A moment of concern flashes into Scott’s eyes before he blinks it away. Stay. In. Character.
“I worry just enough, and I don’t want you two putting our team in danger. We can do that when we all get to red.”
“But Scott, it’s been going so well!” Impulse finally chimes in, “Get one here. Get one there, and little by little we get to the end.”
“Yeah, then we have to fight each other.” Cleo brings up as Pearl looks back at the clock. One minute.
“Not like you haven’t killed your teammates before.” Pearl huffs as the pain slowly begins to ease.
“You're one t-” Pearl flinches as the pain shoots through her again.
“To talk, Pearl.” Cleo says, doing her best to ignore Pearl’s swaying as Impulse checks the time. Thirty seconds.
“I . . .” Pearl breathes doing everything to ignore the pain of her stomach, “didn’t kill a . . . a teammate, Cleo. . . I . . . killed . . . an enemy. . . You. . . and Scott. . . back. . . backstabbed me.”
“We would have had to fight each other anyways.” Cleo waves off, “It was us, Gem and Martyn. She was going after him, and you were the closest one too us.”
“St– Still . . . a backstab . . . though.” Pearl breathes before all of their comms buzzed. Pearl lets out a pained whine as she drops to her knees holding her stomach. Her friends immediately race to her side.
“I’m fine.”
“You’re not.” Cleo says before another spike comes. It was a long one this time, a solid 20 seconds. Once the world unfreezes, Pearl falls onto Scott.
“Get her in bed!”
“Cl-Cleo.” Pearl whines as her soulmate lifts her.
“Impulse, best be making– Oh you are.” Cleo stops turning to find the imp already with bowls and ingredients over a crafting bench.
“I got it, but best let Grian know we'll need a bit longer of a break.”
“That’s not necessary.” Pearl’s voice rang out, sounding almost too pained to speak.
“It is necessary, and we are doing it. One way or another.” Cleo says, their voice stern. She heads to the far edge of the island before looking at her comm to see she had missed some messages.
Grian> Everyone okay after that lag spike?
Renthedog> All good here.
Ethoslab > that was a big one.
GoodtimewithScar> *couf* Thats waht she said *couf*
SolidarityGaming> Good here
Gem> Me and Joel are alright.
Grain> Impulse? Cleo? How’s your group?
Cloe takes a breath. Hoping their message wasn’t going to have the whole server come sprinting over.
Zombiecleo> Impulse, Scott, and I are okay, but the lag hit Pearl pretty hard. She’s in bed now, but may need a bit longer of a break.
Pearlescentmoon: I’m fine!
Grian> omw
SolidarityGaming> same
“Hey.”
“Ah!” Cleo screams turning to find BigB. They slap his arm. “BigB! You know I hate that!” The man giggles.
“Sorry. Sorry. Forget you scare easily.” He pauses, “How’s Pearl?”
“Her stomach seems to have gotten the brunt of it. She’s lying down now, at least, she should be.” Cleo explains looking into the distance. They bite their lip for BigB to pat their shoulder.
“Hey, she’ll be alright. I mean, yeah, she’ll need to take it easy on this next part of the session, but. . . She’s tough. She’ll make it through.”
“Yeah.” Cloe breathes before the two start their way over to the others. They find Tango, Skizz and Gem had decided to pop over unannounced. The latter coming to apparently shake the daylights out of Grian.
“FIX. YOUR. GAME! FIX. YOUR. GAME! YOU CRIPTIC BIRDMAN! SO HELP ME!”
“G-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-m!” Grian tries to say.
“The lag spike nearly killed me! It nearly killed Joel! It practically could have killed the whole server! And I know you had something to do with it! So, you’re going to fix it, you feathered freak!”
“Alright Gem, no killing the bird man on break. Save it for the cameras.” Cleo says for the fox hybrid to release the red sweatered avian. She storms back to the patient at hand for the zombie to look at the main admin.
“So, what exactly caused the spikes to happen?”
“Heh, um,” Grian chuckles, ducking his head, “would you believe me if I said chickens?” Cleo pauses folding her arms.
“Strangely enough, yes, but I have a feeling that wasn’t the case this time.”
“That’s because it wasn’t.” Grian smiles nervously, “Creepers were blowing up our chests. We were lucky none of us died on that last one.”
“I’m sure you’d replace the lives if you had. I mean the break was already called before it happened. Just needed time for the mode to change.” Cleo pauses looking over at the small crowd of nurses tending to their begrudging patient. “Will her recovery be long? She'll be insistent on getting back to work.”
“With a spike like that, she'll need to take it slow for a while. Probably two, maybe three days. Should be back to normal by then, that is, as long as no more spikes happen.” Grian explains before the two walk over to join the chaotic party.
“It's dandelion so it will help more than regular. Just remember to drink it slowly.” Impulse says giving a bowl to Pearl as Big B sits on the end of the bed, looking in his inventory.
“Muscle relaxer Muscle relaxer. Hmmm, maybe if we combined pufferfish and glow-berries? Or snow and carrots?”
“What got hurt Poppers?" Skizz questions, standing overhead, "Head? Stomach? How many fingers am I holding up?” He holds up two fingers before Jimmy chimes in.
“Are you warm enough Pearl? I can craft a blanket if you'd like.”
"And I can get a campfire going." Tango states going to chop down a tree as Scott starts up a brewing stand.
"Are you sure it was just your stomach muscles affected? Your back's fine? What about your limbs?"
“Oh my Notch.” Pearl says, looking away from the group. Gem chuckles before turning to the mother hens.
“Hey guys?” The four stop what they're doing and look at the Canadian, “Maybe you should try to find some snow? It will help relieve some of the pain in her joints.” There's a pause.
"Powder snow for Pearlie!" Tango yells rushing off the island.
"For Pearlie!" The others cheer racing after him, dragging Grian along. Cleo chuckles before turning their attention back to the disgruntled Australian.
“Did you enjoy the attention, Love?” They joke sitting on the side of the bed. Pearl rolls her eyes, hoping her face wasn't too red.
“When’s the break supposed to end?” She questions as Gem pets her hair back.
“Soon enough. As of now, you need rest.”
“I need everyone to stop making such a big deal about this.” Pearl huffs, wiping soup from her chin. “It was just a spasm. It’s gone now. I’m fine.”
“Pearl, you had four of them. Back-to-back I might add. and with that last one I thought you were going to pass out.”
“According to Scott, I did.” She huffs, rolling her eyes again, “But look, I’ll take it easy for the next part of the session. I have that storage room I want to build anyways.”
The two red heads glance at each other. They knew Pearl well enough to know that, while she could spend twenty minutes deciding on what flower to put in a flowerpot, she was also likely to get a build burst and expand said storage room twenty blocks in all directions.
“How about this,” Cleo pauses, brushing some hair from Pearl’s face, “build the storage room, but you have to take five-to-ten-minute breaks every thirty minutes.”
"Can't it be every hour?"
"Nope." Gem pops, "Every thirty minutes, that way you're not overworking yourself."
"Fine." Pearl sighs, not happy with the arrangement but it was better than staying up here and farming.
"Good." Cleo smiles, cupping Pearl's face. "We worry about you, Love."
"I know." Pearl mutters, snuggling into their hand, "I jus-" The world stops again.
"Ah!" Pearl whines curling inwards. Gem takes the bowl as Cleo helps her to lay on her side.
"Ah. Guess they. . . . found snow."
"I'll kill them when they get back." Gem states rubbing circles on Pearl's shoulder. Cleo questions if there's anything they can do to help.
"Magma cream might work?" Gem pauses, "Heat is best for stomach muscles. Honestly, I should have thought of it earlier."
"Ah, with the lot that was here fussing about, I don't blame you for not thinking of it." Cleo says opening a chest. "I'll be surprise if they don't come back with a mountain's worth of snow for you, Pearl."
"Great, build a snow tower out of it." She hums, "Did Griba extend the break? Felt like it should have ended by now."
"He did. We have ten extra minutes." Cleo comes back and sits down, "Meaning you have more time to rest."
"Easier said than done." Pearl pauses as she turns onto her back. Gem runs her fingers through the Aussie's hair as Cleo applies the cream. "Why did it have to be L.I.M.S.?"
"Because the universe needed to nerf you somehow. You're too powerful otherwise." Gem explains, "Now rest up. Gonna be a long rest of the session if you don't."
"Gonna be a long rest of break." Pearl pauses before giving a small smile, "Thanks for this though."
"Of course, Love." Cleo says, smiling down at her before their comms buzz.
Grian> Incoming!
Tango> Stack of snow blocks for Pearlie!
Skizzleman> And we picked up more visitors! :D
“Oh, for the love of Void!”
Hi again! So, I've been half MIA for the last. . . . idk how long. . . . and there are reasons. Family stuff, Halloween things but also . . . the toxic-ish GGG discourse at the start of WL . . . Didn't like it. Didn't like seeing it. Didn't like how reading it made me feel and I didn't want to be dragged into it by posting my own head-cannons and such. Luckily, things have cooled down. So, I will possibly be back to posting when I can.
As for this story, I wanted some hurt/comfort, and to be reminded that while they may fight on camera, at the end of the day, they are all still friends who love and care for each other, and that's what matters. <3
#pearlescentmoon#zombiecleo#geminitay#scott smajor#impulsesv#grian#bigbstatz#skizzleman#jimmy solidarity#tangotek#traffic life series#trafficblr#wild life smp
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