#gray-sexual

[aroaceconfessions]

What the fuck even is sexual attraction. Like what am i even trying to parce here. Has the one singular event of ‘wow i might be attracted to this person actually’ ive experienced been genuine sexual attraction or am i just being emotionally attached to my close friends again. Like how many times do i have to think that about this person before it starts tipping into probably being true

I understand that human experience does not fit into neatly divided boxes and i get that its a good thing but it would be soooo much fucking easier if i could just read a checklist and get told if im ace or gray or demi or whatever the fuck is going on with this whole mess

Its been literal years. The entirety of figuring out where i am in regards of gender and romantic shit took mere months, and its been over three FUCKING years. Simply is not fair

The worst part is im not comfortable with just slapping an ‘acespec’ on there and going, no, because i dont care about the actual label, i just want to understand how my own fucking emotions work >:/

Catch me desperately clinging to ‘non-sam aro’ like a lifeline so i dont have to figure out how my sexuality works ever

Submitted June 18, 2023

[transenbyconfessions]

My friend, who I was working with last week, is really lovely, but absolutely hopeless with pronouns. Because we've known each other so long he struggles to see me as anything but male and he seemed surprised that most people now see me as a woman. Though he always gets my name right, he constantly referred to me as 'he' last time we worked together — much to our customers' confusion, because most of them instinctively referred to me as 'she'! One customer who I had met a few times before didn't even recognise me and thought I was a cis woman! Massive gender euphoria.

Submitted May 12, 2023

[yourlocalbadgerscales]

Incorrect Marauders Quotes

James: Guys Remus: Yeah, James? Sirius: What’s up? James: I’ve been meaning to tell you something for a while now… I… James: I’m pan- pana- panesaxe- pann-pansensu- Remus: Take your time, mate James: *points at Lily and Regulus* James: Boys and girls James: Both James: *points at the roof* And a third option Evan: *falls from the ceiling* *groans* James: … whatever he is.

[chaotic-emo-pigeon]

love my friends and their gay little classics. tag your sexuality and favorite old novel.

[nyaskitten]

It's crazy I've never stopped interacting with a fandom as fast as Mouthwashing y'all can be annoying as fuck 😭😭😭

[bizarreaizen]

"can i still be aro if i'm ____?"

"can i still be aro if i'm dating someone?"

"can i still be aro if i said _____ to someone?"

"can i still be aro if i feel ____?"

there's no "wrong" or "right" way to be aromantic, aromantic is a spectrum and it goes beyond by a lot so yes if your aromantic, it doesn't matter how you feel/act or do, if you know your aromantic, you are aromantic ^w^ /gen /pos

[obscuravoid]

Anatomy practice featuring the one and only Benrey from HLVRAI, Benrey from HLVRAI, Benrey from HLVRAI, and don't forget Benrey from HLVRAI!

I can't pick a favorite so I've decided that all Benrey designs ever made are the same guy and he just shapeshifts between them whenever he wants. (This is canon now and I will not be taking criticism)

[prostocupoftea]

I have done what kinitopet fandom (probably) does not have but totally does (not) need... a CRIME AU! i am so sorry

Tw on poorly drawn guns, masks, scars, robbery police etc baisicly crime stuff

I have so much work why am i doing this... it is like 3 am...... aNYWAY---

More yapping and magnifyed parts under the cut

I was just literally sitting in the bus from uni and like "jeez can't imagine how those with full au-s abt tsp or kp, that must be so hard, i have one design and im already dying

And than i thought what au can i do for kinitopet

And here i am, 5 hours later with full ref-sheet and a little story idea in my head

Okay now to the au

It might be bad it might be okay-ish, well an okay-ish option is that they are like "Bad Guys"-ajesent group, you know, rob banks, skedadle with money, no killing, etc, all to make them redeamable, but, i mean.... they are horror charscters.... we all want our qute kinito but, u know...... he literally does not take "no" for an answer, just saying

So my idea is that maybe kinito does crime to get attentoin of that one detective, you know, "You" and does those "hello, you!" like he is talking to everyone while specifically naming You (((:

Aaand he is really in crime for that cat-n-mouse game, money are a bonus to do more crime with, he is just resl smart and wants to find soneone who is as intelligent as him and can catch him (or at least follow his clues)

Also they wear matching fake tatoos bc statistically most people are gonna notice a tatoo and they are gonna search you by it

And they have their secret normal lifes ofc bc why not

Sooooooo, i'll probably would never draw those guys again unless i guess y'all really like them, but in any case be free to take them and do whatev ya want, just tag/credit me (:

[prince-liest]

Don't mind me getting on my soapbox for a moment... a lot of this musing is admittedly for the sake of my own processing of this topic, re: aroaceness. Read at your own peril! <3

I'm generally a very "ship and let ship" kind of person, but I think I would definitely append a little caveat of, like, "As long as you're not being actively invalidating and detrimental to others" to that. Which is a delightfully vague statement that can be interpreted practically any way, I know, hahaha.

In the case of this particular post I've just been thinking about how, like... seeing an aroace character like Alastor get written into dozens upon dozens of PWPs (including ones that don't even touch on the subject of his aceness at all) is really not something that I personally find to be hurtful or offensive. It's just smut for the sake of smut, of a character people want to see awful, sexy things done to (or doing). Valid! I vibe with you! More people should just write the PWPs they want to see in the world!

But on the other hand, I've several times seen this very particular type of art (usually it's a comic, but admittedly I haven't been reading very many Hazbin Hotel fics so maybe it's there, too) where Alastor is slotted into the "methinks the lady doth protest too much" trope. As in, he's expressing strong feelings about a character (usually Vox or Lucifer, sometimes Angel Dust) to someone, probably Rosie, and the person he's confiding to is some variant of, "Oh, silly Alastor, you're obviously in love!" And then he denies it, says that the very idea disgusts him, and the character titters to themselves about how he's so naive in the matters of romance or whatever.

And it's, like.

The "strong feelings" in question are almost always frustration/annoyance/disgust, and him being like, "Nnnno, I just hate his person" is treated like a silly and naive misunderstanding of his own feelings because obviously he's in love. Please imagine that Alastor was a female character who was established to be a lesbian. Now examine how that suddenly makes this scene feel.

(Also, Rosie being the go-to for this is a little frustrating when she's the one who, in canon, explicitly says that she wouldn't make that assumption of him.)

There's such a chasm of difference between how I see people wanting to ship Alastor for reasons of "I just want to!" vs folks who engage with him being aroace in ways that are infantilizing and invalidating. There are so many people out there - not just aro/ace people, but anyone who's not exclusively into the standard type of person they should be into at the time society deems they should be into them, which is most queer people and even many cishet folks - that have been told that exact kind of thing in real life. It reads like something out of a compulsory heterosexuality guidebook, and it actively makes it harder to leave the closet or even realize that you're in one at all.

So I guess it just feels frustrating to see it get made into a punchline, especially by folks who are shipping queer ships. I genuinely can't wait until fandom society advances to the point of consistently treating aro/acespec folks as queer instead of Queer Lite (TM), because let me tell you, ime the comphet experience and the amato/allonormativity experience are in fact nigh-identical except for how they're treated within online communities. There's a reason the pan -> gay -> ace pipeline is a thing.

But, hey! We're already doing way better than we were in 2012!

[drawingpsmraiden]

Hmmmmm...does snake live with Raiden or....?

No, no he does not (day 26)

Say hello uh....you?

[aroaceconfessions]

I’m Arospec in a complicated way and acespec in an even more complicated way and I wish someday we could see more characters who aren’t just aroace, but on the spectrums in their own unique way, like so many of us are.

Submitted May 25, 2023

[ranas-twisted-wonderland]

slight yurena redesign!!! wanted to give her uniform a more old-timey feel since she canonically has an old-timey uniform (so I added these cool looking stripes :333)

plus a little sleepwear drawing I did

[reimeichan]

As I start nearing 30 years old, and also as I become more integrated, I've started exploring who "I" am, as a person, and as a single identity. I know that not too long ago I made a post talking about these aspects of who I am, as a person, post-fusion. But I've also been finding more and more bits and pieces of myself and working through my trauma since then, and as new information crops up, I'm starting to once again re-examine who I am.

Mainly, I've been exploring my gender and sexuality. My sexuality especially has always been very clear to me since I was 14. I'm asexual. Nothing had really changed that for well over a decade. And not for lack of trying, too; I explored my feelings on sexuality and sex for a long time and it was something I would regularly rotate around in my head. Am I truly ace? I enjoy reading hentai and watching porn and reading smut, does that mean I'm sexually attracted to people? I'm hypersexual, how does that factor in to my ace-ness? Am I maybe aro as well? Am I demi-ace? Is my asexuality a result of my trauma? Does that make my asexuality more or less valid in that way? I explored every aspect of my asexual identity as thoroughly as I could, and each time I emerged on the other side even more certain that "asexual" was the best and closest label to describe my sexuality.

But, now... as I work through these different parts of me and understand the bits of me I had dissociated away, I'm starting to become more connected to... having sexual attraction to others. It's not that I was wrong about being ace for all these years; I think it's important to honor and acknowledge that part of my history. But I also think that to continue to call myself "asexual" is doing a disservice to myself. I do find people "hot". I do think about and fantasize about people's bodies. It's no longer about just the act of sex or kink itself turning me on (as it had been when I was ace), I'm very much attracted to people's bodies. And in that way I think it's more accurate to tell others that I am bisexual. And... that's quite a change, for me. To start acknowledging that I have sexual feelings towards others, and am sexually attracted to them, is so new to me, when in the past this wasn't something I ever felt like I had experienced.

And similarly, my gender. The thing that I could never figure out, but with each passing day I find further clarity. I think I know how to explain my gender now. I was a girl. For much of my childhood, I was absolutely a girl. But as I hit my preteen years and my teenage years, that started to shift. I saw myself less as a girl, and more as something.... in-between and outside of that. Nonbinary. Agender. Androgynous. I don't know what term works best, but I know what it was for me. And again, in early adulthood, that shifted yet again. I was genderfluid, a girly guy, a femboy. But I'm not going to be a young adult for much longer, and I find myself looking into the future. In my middle age, who I am? Who do I see myself becoming? And, beyond that, who will I be when I'm even older, at retirement age or even as an elderly 80, 90 year old?

And as I think about this future version of me, I realize that I am no longer a genderfluid girly femboy. I'm... a guy. I'm a middle aged Asian man. I don't know if "transmasc" or "trans man" really is the best way to describe that, but it's the closest word I have for what I see and what I feel. But really, just calling myself a guy is enough I think. I'm going to be a middle aged guy sooner than later, and I want to take some steps for this future version of me so that he can feel more comfortable in his skin.

I'm still a femboy right now. I like this version of me and I plan to stick with it as long as it feels right. But I also know this isn't who I'm going to be forever, and that's okay.

It's so weird, exploring all of these feelings at my age, especially when I thought I had it all figured out. But life isn't so clear cut, and you're never too old to figure out who you are. And it's okay for things to change as you get older, too. Either way, I'm excited for whoever I end up becoming, and I'm proud of who I am right now.

[hydra-collector]

whats a fandom that youre not into but you like to see on your dash anyway. for me its house md

[musicalmoritz]

Shocked to see discourse on Sydney Novak’s sexuality, I thought the show made it incredibly obvious that she’s a lesbian. Not just that she likes women, they made her disinterest in men very clear through that scene where she said she suddenly realized why she didn’t like Stan. I haven’t watched the show since it came out so I can’t go too in depth with this but her journey was very clearly leading in the lesbian direction to me, like they could not have made it any more obvious. People need to learn that media analysis goes deeper than what’s shown on screen, a large part of it is being able to read between the lines. I think that’s why a lot of canon queer characters get their sexualities denied by the fandoms, some fans just refuse to use their brains lol

[hxnnibxi]

born to be asexual, forced to be horny all the goddamn time