#fully aware it’s not my place but
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#accidentally saw that namjoon propaganda video on insta#i follow exactly one bts meme account and yet#that shit still finds me against my will#big yikes#there’s no way the military isn’t exploiting#his role as the voice of bts#as a tool to further their own agenda#i refuse to believe he finished#a month of boot camp in the middle of winter#after leaving his work project unfinished on some level#and his first thoughts were ‘yeah that was great this is so necessary’#‘this is a FUN and REWARDING experience’#he can’t publicly say anything else but also#he could#simply keep his mouth shut but#this is probably part of the gig for him#i’ve genuinely tried to avoid inserting myself into military discourse#fully aware it’s not my place but#watching him become such a blatant tool of the state#is especially rough#you know a ton of people will buy it as genuine endorsement#he’s there because he has to be#everything he says while there and about the experience#is going to be incredibly calculated#ok back to my regularly scheduled bs#felt like i needed to get that out#love that the tumblr fandom has been so good about not posting that garbage#military stuff
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From a dream I had
He was at my grandmother's house, literally the same place i first had a dream of him when I was little
#red room studi0's art#wreck it ralph#digital art#turbo#turbo wreck it ralph#turbotastic#turbo wir#turbo art#wreck it ralph turbo#nice pink hawaiian shirt loser#“IT'S THAMON!!!!!!”#Also it's scary in the dream that he was fully aware that he remembers our first visit and in the same place no less#he might actually be haunting me guys#my little bill cipher-like freak
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My fantasy mental health treatment is where I go live somewhere for four months where they control my schedule so that I am regularly eating, exercising, and sleeping, but that I also have plenty of free time and am not forced to do psychotherapy until I get some semblance of stability back. Basically going to the seaside to recover from illness. Unfortunately that's probably only available to rich people.
#anecdotes by peachdoxie#actually my fantasy mental health treatment is an executive functioning symbiote but thats even less likely tp happen#I'm sure someone's going to come into the notes and tell me a place like this exists but it's actually horrible#and yes i am fully aware of the abuses that go on in mental health treatment places#which is why it's a fantasy with the exact support I'd like to have
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SKETCH: Olympic Khaan
My country is incredibly patriotic and very gun ho about the Olympics (you can’t ignore it even if you try) and well…Jorvik would wipe the floor in the equestrian events and who else is best to represent either dressage or cross country than Sabine and Khaan!
The thought of “scary” Sabine and Khaan not in their go-to red and black but rather in Jorvik green and blue, representing the very country they’re trying to destroy, tickled me and lately I’ve needed a good giggle
Saying that though, I still don’t know how horses work and as much as I’d love to do a Jorvik team line up for a bit of fun I just don’t have the skills for that yet.
#I’m fully aware of everything that’s going on with the Olympics I just need this out of my head#oh god Jorvik being the place it is would have their show jumpers and dressage team wearing bright green or blue jackets#sso sabine#sso art#sso Khaan
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theres something to be said about the accidental symbolism of the horns in double life
grian got ponder originally which is a doo doo dudooooo kinda pattern and then got seek which is the same pattern but with a scratchier sound and offered it to scott
their stories then mirror in both having previously done a series with their partner and this time (somewhat) rejecting them (and later being tortured by them) only scott fully rejected pearl to live across from cleo while grian still kept scar around but tried to be secret soulmates with bigb. and ultimately scott and pearl did the whole sacrifice for the other person to win thing, reprising grian and scar's 3rd life ending same pattern, different sound.
(theres also something to be said here about how they are similar people, you can see it in the quiet agreement to stand around and get butted at by goats and in the bit where scott punches scar, sees grian take damage and "*he knows" and he knows he knows he knows and scott realizes what grian realized, that grian is once again trailing reluctantly after scar to keep him safe but also knows he shouldn't tell scar cause grian hasn't. they're both very intelligent in similar ways and it shows)
later on grian got another ponder (which he offered to scar instead of the seek he initially gave him) and mentioned how there was a reply to it (sing, du dudoooo) that he really wanted (and later jimmy and tango got)
so more narrative comparisons. the two soulmate pairs at that point have matching horns, grian and scar are ponder and jimmy and tango are sing. notoriously jimmy and scar are the two that everyone was scared of being partnered with because they die and take damage a lot. the thing i find interesting is how different their narratives are grian and scar had already been partnered and worked together previously, meanwhile, jimmy and tango had barely spoken prior. you'd expect that the two who were already friends and found out they were partnered (or at least grian found out) in a more or less positive way would choose to be friends, no? and you'd think that the two who didn't know each other and met by dying would have an awkward stumbling dynamic and possibly resent (in character) each other, right? but turned out it was the opposite way around (because of personalities blah blah blah). its not super related to the horn patterns I'll admit but something about the way.. its almost as if grian's horn says this is how it is (this being like rejecting scar because of their past) and the ranchers horn being like what if it doesn't have to be (something about clean slates, seeing people in new light, reintroducing yourself, taking all the best of a person despite a bad circumstance like yknow. killing them when you first meet. don't know anyone else whos accidentally blown up someone when they first met cough cough 3rd life cough)
please feel free to add your thoughts
#i dont think i fully got my point across about ranchers and desert duo#tbh i forgot the point i was trying to make halfway through writing it lol#i love comparing narratives and patterns and stories#patterns coming up in this series is so cool to me because its unscripted#they didnt mean for the narrative things to happen#another one im crazy about is how the first third and fifth winners had the person in second place offer themselves up and say kill me#i want you to win#and then the second and fourth winners had a sort of#self awareness about it being a game#and made themselves win#anyway#just thoughts#double life#3rd life#third life#life smp#life series#grian#scott smajor#smajor1995#goodtimeswithscar#gtwscar#gtws#jimmy solidarity#tangotek#pearlescentmoon#bigb#bigbstatz#desert duo#scarian
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Y'know what. Maybe I WILL become the freak professor obsessed with research and eye motifs. Maybe I WILL be on my avatar bullshit with my own work
#og.txt#listen. i rotate between entities but Beholding has a very special place in my heart as a scientist#the thirst for knowledge to the point where i couldnt care less about the terrifying depths of the ocean and undiscovered species#the urge to know so strongly that i know it will be my downfall every time but being fully aware of it#and also research. animal research nerd. but thats not as cool to talk about most the time#tma paganism#tma pcp#the beholding#the eye#ceaseless watcher
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#dan and phil#daniel howell#dan howell#phan#dan and phil games#dnpgames#dapgames#I think most of these are very unlikely for the record#but I wanted to include every popular theory I’ve seen!#personally my money is on pride month content of some sort#I think we already know he’s going some places for the book#so it wouldn’t be NEWS ya know?#also I’m fully aware he might be trolling us lmao#but I think theorizing is fun!#meg yaps#also apologies if this has already been done!
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Both lesson 12 and lesson 19 in NB are actually great reminders that OG timeline Lucifer would absolutely pretend like nothing happened after MC's disappearance and that he is in fact completely unaffected by it all, maybe even distancing and isolating himself entirely from everyone else if he can't keep up the act, meanwhile behind closed doors he is completely falling apart because his pride just won't. let. him. be. vulnerable.
#me?#posting lucifer angst?#yea i've actually been thinking about him a lot lately & i have a lot of thoughts about this emotionally repressed man#btw my favorite part about all this is that usually everyone else is fully aware how much he's suffering#but he still can't talk about it bc of his pride and so he continues to suffer in silence#while everyone else just continues to silently watch bc they a) don't know how to help him in the first place and#b) know that lucifer would just shut them down anyways if they tried#obey me#obey me nightbringer#obey me lucifer#mel's starry musings
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people with onsite laundry will never understand the epic highs and lows of laundromat life
#went in the other day to my laundry and there were like these people just standing around in there and when i came in they were like omg#you’re just in time it’s free wash night!!!! and i was like oh because i forgot that the local emergency assistance place does free wash#nights there but i well and truly can afford my load of laundry so i felt bad and i tried to tell them this but they did not listen and it#wasn’t like there was a line of people waiting for free wash so it was like fine but then they left before my wash cycle was done and i was#like now wait a minute what about my free dry#<- KIDDING i did not care but it was funny#anyways mat life has changed me like fundamentally as a person#fully aware that some city people will read thsi post and be like what are you even talking about like everyone experiences laundromat to#some extent or another and herein lies a cultural divide because i like in alabama and laundromats are not really the norm i feel like even#in our metro areas lol because i work in a metro area and i’ll mention going to the laundromat at work and people are like whatttttttt you#don’t have on-site ?????? and i’m like no i don’t have onsite but my rent is $765 a month including utilities so i can simply cope for rent#that is that cheap like local laundromat will have my business forever if that’s all i have to pay for rent
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!! UT/DR NEWSLETTER SPOILERS !!
(+ brain dump)
guys i cannot be the only one who can't get this out of my head
it wasn't explicitly stated but i'm pretty sure this is Asriel talking about Chara, and there's something so melancholy aboutwhat he's saying. you really get an insight into Chara's mentality about humanity and the world. "nothing can hurt you anymore, nothing can hurt anyone anymore"... it's further solidifies that Chara is a hurt kid that wants to fix things no matter the cost, even if the way they try and "fix" things is totally fucked up and wrong (referring to when they tried to get Asriel to kill the humans on the surface. like they fucked up big time and ended up killing their best friend but their heart was kinda in the right place)
also the last lines. "I just hope we'll be friends for 999 more years". is so messed up.
Asriel and Chara aren't going to see each other ever again, yet they're still going to stay "alive" for the next 999 years. Flowey (probably) can't die without a soul, and Chara is a ghost watching and narrating Frisk. they've both changed, they've both royally fucked up, and they're both going to live with that
for the next 999 years
#godddd my heART#toby can't keep getting away with this!!1!1#these two have permanently altered my brain chemistry#(yall i am shit at explaining things tell me if it doesnt make sense lmao)#also. i should clarifiy#when i say that Chara's “heart was in the right place”#i am fully aware that part of the reason they convinced Asriel to go to the surface is because they likely wanted to get revenge#on the people who had hurt them. aka the humans#so yeah part of it was to free the underground. but they were also totally hurt and angry and lashed out at the humans#theyre not evil but theyre certainly not completely innocent either#(we believe in morally grey Chara in this household)#but like i think that further shows just how hurt they are#and it reinforces the motive behind "nothing can hurt you anymore#undertale#chara undertale#chara dreemurr#asriel dreemurr#asriel undertale#flowey#flowey undertale#utdr newsletter
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#oc#haven#rex#monochrome#contents: a little raunchy for tumblr#doodle#really high effort one but it's about the shapes more than anything else lol#meme redraw#comic#i may color this. the original plan was to color it. however i spent all my energy for coloring on drawing an aftermath coda#im fond of this one. there's a lot happening in it#haven and rex are both dressed "up'' to annoy the other's plus-one minor enemy#<- specific au element#rex is wearing a weezer shirt because haven knows that'll piss off taran. haven is dressed up like rex's best attempt at a mid-00s surfer#because he knows felyx cant fucking stand haven and is also into buff masc dudes dressed in jeans with rhinestones and thinks it'll be funn#to put felyx in the Lustful Colander#(he is right)#haven's house is not actually a cool neat influencer home or whatever there's no like open floorplan white walls light bamboo floor bullshi#going on here. it's all like green and red granite tile and shit. the man has been around for a very long time he knows what kind of decor#he's fond of. those ARE fish tanks in the walls though. and a spiral staircase#the man has been around for a very long time. he does not give a shit if what he likes is 'tacky'#also when the one speechbubble he says gets weird it is because he is using a magic power and forcing rex to put his cigarette out. rex is#naturally kind of annoyed about this. it used to make haven wince when he put his cigs out on his hands so he keeps doing it every time thi#happens but he has not yet cottoned on to the fact that haven has fully stopped wincing and now just thinks it's a normal habit he has#and has no idea that it's specifically aimed in his direction#also haven has no issue with giving head but rex isn't aware of that. they don't communicate well#and what Rex is actually aware of mostly consists of 'asking him to bottom turned into a giant argument and then a physical actual fight#and he broke my jaw in like four places over it and it was awesome but i didnt get what i wanted' and kind of gave up on the subject#he couldve been getting his d!ck sucked this whole time and he didnt know it. so sad#lineart
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I didn't watch Eurovision this year but I'm feeling like this is filling that hole...
#no idea what is going on but I am here for it#Olympics#fully aware of the BS politics but tumblr is my safe place#paris 2024
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“What is this?” Unknown demands, giving the oversized cup a once-over. He does not appreciate the tacky snowflake print any more than he appreciates the fact that it is decidedly not what he asked for.
You shoot him a sheepish smile that he could really do without, before stabbing the sheer plastic lid of your drink with a large pastel pink straw identical to the one waiting for him on the dashboard. “You said you wanted something that would keep you awake.”
Unknown grits his teeth. It's like he has to spell every little thing out for you lest you should fuck it up— maybe he shouldn't really be surprised, considering he's had to deal with your antics for months now, but that doesn’t mean he’s pleased with your behavior. “I wanted an energy drink.” He may not drink them often, but they come in handy when he spends long hours on surveillance missions such as this one.
“Oh.” You wrinkle your brow, looking genuinely apologetic. “I'm sorry. I wish you would have said something— hopefully this will be okay, though. It does have a lot of caffeine and sugar— plus, I got us some pastries, too.”
You brandish a box (also printed with snowflakes) which looks big enough to contain more than enough pastries for the two of you. “Next time, get me what I ask for.” He shouldn’t have to say that, but Unknown understands now that it’s better to err on the side of caution when giving you directions.
“Of course.” You don't contest the fact that he never explicitly asked you for an energy drink, which, to your credit, does improve Unknown's mood infinitesimally. He’s not in the mood for an argument today, any more than he’s in the mood for… whatever you’re trying to give him now. “But, listen, this should give you enough energy to stay up until we're back at Magenta, anyway. And they're doing a promotion for winter— see the little flap in the cup? There's a plushie keychain behind it.”
“Next time, I'll go with you into the store,” Unknown decides, too caught up in his own thoughts to consider the new information that you’ve offered. None of the work that he got done while you were in the coffee shop makes up for the potential risks associated with leaving you to your own devices for so long. He sincerely hopes that the Savior doesn't look at her card history for this evening, because he has no interest in explaining why so many ridiculous things were purchased in the name of the Mint Eye.
You're not listening to him, either, already prying open the little door in the side of your cup to get to the plushie. Unknown is irrationally annoyed about this, and he stews in his anger as you withdraw the stupid little thing. “Aw,” you look dejected, which comforts him. “Damn.” You might be annoying, but at least your pouting face is cute.
“What's the problem, prince(ss)?” Angry or not, Unknown will never pass up an opportunity to mess with you.
“I don't really like this character,” you confess, “Like, it’s fine, I guess, but I was hoping to get something else.”
“Oh, you poor thing,” Unknown murmurs mockingly, reveling in your disappointment just as he indulges in all of your emotions. He really does enjoy his time with you, all things considered— but, then again, he never would have picked you if he didn’t want to be around you.
“You should open yours.” Now you're giving him puppy-dog eyes, which has never been a particularly effective method in your dealings with Unknown— of course, that’s never stopped you before, and he apparently can’t expect it to stop you this time, either. “Please? It's already paid for. It would be a waste if you just left it.”
Unknown considers this. As much as he doesn't want to listen to you when you try to give him orders, he is just a bit curious about what might be inside the cup. And you do have a point— it is already paid for. Even though he doesn't want it, if there's any enjoyment to be had from this irresponsible decision of yours, he may as well revel in that, too, before the Savior finds out what has taken place and limits his use of the Mint Eye credit card. Most likely, he'll no longer be allowed to leave you unattended with it.
Whatever. It takes him a moment to get the stupid thing out of the little door— he ends up just ripping the extra bottom compartment off of the rest of the cup and tossing it on the floor of the car. He figures that you can clean it up later. He studies the prize— it’s just some plush cartoon character that he’s never heard of, though you seem to recognize it, if the way that your eyes widen as you study the thing is anything to go on. “What?” He demands, clutching the plushie in his closed fist.
“Can we trade?” You ask sheepishly, holding out your keychain like you expect him to take it. “You got my favorite character.”
Unknown finds himself grinning. He didn’t care at all about the plushie before, but he very much enjoys knowing that he has something that you want. He offers you a smug chuckle before clipping the keychain ring to his belt loop. “No,” he says firmly, “I like this one.”
But his words and actions fail to have the desired effect. You just grin right back at him, silently clapping your hands as if pleased by his performance. Unknown stares up at the ceiling, wondering what the hell he’s going to do with you. As if you can read his thoughts, you select this moment to be extra-annoying: “Now try the drink,” you order, “I promise you’ll love it.”
#another drabble from the vault!#And yeah I'm fully aware that my last 3 fics have involved MC giving Unknown some kind of gift#However#I saw a place that was doing a similar promotion and couldn't get this idea out of my head#So here you go#Mystic messenger#mystic messenger drabble#saeran choi#choi saeran#unknown mystic messenger
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ANYWAY wednesday quest is once again hoover! it was nice working on sewing the blanket patch too once i'd gotten the edges secured, so i'll work on that a bit more too and maybe even finish it! wahoo yippee wednesday!
#migraine really makes me stupid. i'm so dazed and confused and just ??? very aware that a neurological process is occurring.#it took me fully about an hour to pin both patches in place? and i stabbed the absolute shit out of my hands by accident hahaha#BUT we stay silly#gose starts again tomorrow too hahahaha so i can count on a nice hot chocolate time :3
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i've come to the conclusion that i either have the worst timing when it comes to messaging/posting or i'm straight up annoying every single soul on earth so i just get ignored. or maybe both
#this has to do both with irl and online life#triggered mostly by irl events though#i’m fully aware how stupid i sound#i’m also fully aware that i’m insecure af and i suck at communication so it's kinda important to me to message someone first#(only to usually go unnoticed or burried under other messages and issues and idk what else)#same goes with posting; i suck at interacting and idk how else to contribute to a community so i just post stuff/gifs and kinda expect to-#-be counted as someone worthy and when it doesn't happen i feel even more worthless than i already do#and to top it all i’m also in a bad place lately (when haven't i been though) so it’s defo a me thing. you can just ignore this post too#guess that's why i rant here anyway. it's almost sure no one will care about how i feel so i just dump my thoughts and that's all 🤷🏻♀️#this is emma speaking
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oh fucking BROTHER i just finished cleaning and had made smth to eat bc i finally convinced myself after all day that i wld feel better if i did (it’s been a HORRIFIC ed day) and i kid you not as soon as i sat down i dropped the whole thing all OVER myself and it FUCKING BURNED and HURT bc it was SCALDING !!!!! and then i had to clean up the ONE thing id convinced myself was okay to eat OFF THE FLOOR I JUST FINISHED MOPPING!!!!!! BROTHER. WHY ME.
#ed tw#dlt ltr#the reason i convinced myself to even eat was bc my hands were too shaky to paint my nails#which is pathetic. dude ur starving lol.#top tier sanity in my house tonite 👍 mental illness banished idk them#i did not however drop the plate from shaking. i was trying to put it on the table but i have horrible depth perception and#awareness of what’s in my vacinity. i drop crap and crash into shit all the time#idk what to do now that honestly threw me off so bad i sat there in silence for a solid minute#BBQ SAUCE ON MY TIDDIES#IT ACTUALLY WAS TOO I WAS FUCKING EATING A RIB PATTY#or i was going to. now idk what im doing.#horrendously sad and pathetic side note why are eds so invasive. ive been fully relapsed w it for like two weeks how did i get to the place#where i’m TERRIFIED to eat anywhere near four digits within days#whatever i need nicotine bye.
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