#followed by how this chapter ends?
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Yes I do in fact support women’s wrongs! 🥰
#listen. choosing to run probably would have gotten me the#willpower point#but.#it’s the characterization. the utter ferality and desperation#the PIZZAZ#the HURT#followed by how this chapter ends?#it felt fitting#also I think Delilah carries a lot of guilt about this still and absolutely wakes up from nightmares about it#to which Gabe still doesn’t know how to respond#😇#choices immortal desires 2 spoilers#immortal desires 2 spoilers#choices immortal desires 2#immortal desires 2#immortal desires#choices immortal desires#choices vip#playchoices
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a lifetime of happiness
**hnk ch 108 spoilers**
Can't believe it's already been a month since Houseki no Kuni ended... It's been a ride leading up to the finale but I finished the series with tears welling up in my eyes, and a sense of peace. 😭
The ending was hopeful and meaningful— an unexpectedly lovely conclusion for Phos! 🤧 I love the visual metaphor of Phos and the gems being reborn into "The Pure Land", or known as, The Land of the Lustrous, a purified paradise free of materialism and earthly temptations. These delicate gem flowers holding tiny, unique universes, will be eternally brightened by Phos' radiant existence. With the possibility of other universes, I hope that Phos and the others will meet again and lead more fulfilling lives together!! 🛌💭
The way my jaw dropped realizing Ichikawa ended the last chapter on number 108, the Buddhist symbol of overcoming worldly desires and embracing new beginnings to attain nirvana. SO good...😦 The parallel between big brother and Phos, both on self-destructive, morally ambiguous paths for their loved ones/ideals, was a compelling twist. I love them both... 😢 As Aechmea and Adamant hoped, big brother passed on knowing he helped Phos find happiness. 😭 Wailing...
This series has profoundly impacted me more than I imagined, shaping my perspectives on my own values and the world. Despite it coming to an end, we will always stay connected across time and space, just like Phos!!! 🥺🤍
Thank you, Haruko Ichikawa, for creating such a memorable piece of work, and to everyone who has liked my hnk art and commentaries throughout the years! I'll continue loving and drawing the series for as long as I can. 🙇
#housekinokuni#land of the lustrous#hnk#it was the best possible ending for phos and i love how beautifully depicted the closing chapter was T_T#treasuring it in my heart forever!!!#hnk 108#hnk spoilers#thanks to anyone who follows my other platforms and rereads the same caption lol!#i'd like to eventually compile an more complex analysis now that the series is finished!! maybe after i reread everything <:)#pemprika
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*clasps your shoulders gently and looks you straight in the eye*
Keferon. Please read Ninth by Kyn on AO3. I think you would love it very much. It has a large chapter count, but don't be intimidated, it's very easy to get into. It is currently unfinished, but is being updated regularly.
You are the seventh person that recommended this fic to me so ahahahaha yeah
I’m doing great Help I hate some parts of it but I love the other parts I’m spinning in the blender
…..I made the moodboard….
#chapter 37#of 120 or something#I must be like 90k words in haha#large word count is not an intimidation. It’s an invitation haha#I love the fics that I can’t read in just one hour:)#I gotta say I don’t enjoy the concept of making robots into organic life#it’s just my preference#seeing them as humans or animals or whatever feels so fucking wrong#the concept itself drives me off#like. Strongly#But at the same time. This fic isn’t about them being ‘haha cute organics’#it’s ‘oh god. I was turned into something I’m not’#instead of teeheee they’re fluffy#it’s please free me from this fucking nightmare. please let me be myself again.#idk how to explain. I resonate I guess#it often feels very disturbing but the characters are also disturbed#So now I’m kind of stuck reading this fic because I just can’t stop lol#just politely skipping the parts that make me too uncomfortable#also#the body horror is….damn. Impressive. I didn’t expect to read about grotesque fleshy creature turning itself inside out#it’s not even aesthetic or symbolic#it literally looks like a fucking nightmare. Which is impressive also.#the flesh is g r o s s#the beginning got me struggling and skipping#but the intermission is currently ruining my sleep schedule#oh fuck….I usually send my posts to the authors of the fics I read…..but I feel like I might offend the author of Ninth if do this……..#there’s a tiny chance they’re following me….if it’s true then I wanna tell I’m sorry pls don’t take this seriously#your fic got me waay out of my comfort zone#huge points for writing Ratchet. Drift in this fic is…the grossest fucking thing I could probably imagine but Ratchet doesn’t even hesitate#he helps him and he cares for him. Which is…..imma be real my first instinct would be to set Drift on fire to end his misery
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– Beginnings.
Characters >> Lily Castellanos, Nathan Dixon (oc), Sebastian Castellanos Total >> 3.5k words Warnings >> Alcohol mention Context >> The first chapter of my own TEW3, taking place some months after the conclusion of the in-game events of TEW2! You can read more about it all here!
It snowed in Krimson City.
The sky had been the same dull gray color since sunrise, snowflakes slowly cascading down and covering the street in a thick blanket of snow. A heavy fog held the city tightly in its grasp– an eerie atmosphere hanging in the thin afternoon air and low-hanging clouds swallowing entire buildings whole– and with only limited visibility on the road, traffic was forced to crawl by in slow motion.
While not an unseen phenomenon, it was far from a common sight for early January, only days after Nathan’s birthday. He had spent that day snowed in in his little apartment, had celebrated it alone; not as if it mattered much, he doubted Kid even knew and besides his ex-colleague from MOBIUS he severely lacked other friends to hang out with those days.
He stood motionless at the fence of the small playground located in Krimson City’s public park, gloved hands stuffed deep in the pockets of his long, black coat with the collar popped up to shield the lower half of his face from the occasional sharp gust of wind. He had not moved in a while, shoulders and tousled black hair covered in a thin layer of fine white powder, frost nipping away at the tip of his nose as his eyes followed a group of kids excitedly running around.
It did not take a genius to notice Lily was significantly older than the others there, but none of the kids seemed to mind. It came as no surprise to Nathan to see her there– she had not once lost her playfulness even after everything MOBIUS had put her through, and without a proper outlet for it in all her years trapped in the shadow organization it only made sense for her to want to have a chance at spending the remainder of her childhood like she had always been supposed to.
He watched in silence as she scooped up some snow in her pink and orange mittens, wincing when one of the other kids threw a snowball directly at her face; she was smiling, though, and quickly pressed the snow together to then hurl it back, the surprisingly well-aimed attempt hitting someone else on the back of their coat.
‘You’re startin’ to freak out the other parents, standing there like that.’
The corners of Nathan’s mouth lightly curled up upon hearing the familiar, low voice, not needing to turn his head to know who joined him on the other side of the fence.
‘Was starting to wonder how long it’d take for you to notice me,’ he said, his own voice a little rougher than usual on account of the cold, and his severe lack of proper rest in the past few weeks. ‘Was gonna give you another five minutes before I’d walk over to introduce myself. You’re getting slow.’
‘I’m getting comfortable,’ Sebastian Castellanos corrected him with a scoff, returning Lily’s little wave as she ran by the both of them– Nathan merely greeted her with a single nod of his head– before quickly shoving his hand back in the pocket of his green jacket.
‘No need to keep my eyes up anymore, Nate. Threat’s gone, MOBIUS’ gone. Life’s improving day by day.’
‘Good.’
Nathan wished he shared Sebastian’s sentiment.
If anything, life had turned rather sour for him after they had successfully gotten rid of a large chunk of MOBIUS several months ago. He had never expected to walk away from it alive to begin with– and now, without the steady income the organization had provided him with for years, he found himself struggling to get by.
He glanced to his right, gaze briefly meeting that of the ex-detective before he quickly averted his eyes and let them wander back to the playground, trailing over the various snow-covered playground sets.
Sebastian looked good, healthy– much better than the state he’d been in when Nathan had last seen him all those months ago. Part of him regretted not reaching out sooner, the sudden reconnection now an obvious sign that something was wrong; though the wiser part of him knew that had he stuck around the Castellanos family they would not have been able to move on and heal, which was the last thing he would have wanted to be responsible for.
‘What about you?’ Sebastian quietly asked, as if he’d been able to sense Nathan’s melancholy. ‘You look like you haven’t slept in days.’
Nathan scoffed, slightly tilting his head to look at his feet and he absently kicked some snow off his boots. ‘That obvious? Sure feels like it.’
He had teamed up with Juli Kidman to deal with the remainder of MOBIUS, after the Union incident. Of course the destruction of the STEM environment hadn’t led to the fall of the whole organization– it would’ve been stupid of them to link all of their employees directly to the mainframe of a single STEM device, despite the Superiors’ obvious lack of knowledge concerning the technology– and while MOBIUS had suffered massive losses, it would only be a matter of time before they would regroup.
But he was not there to talk to Sebastian about how their hunt was going.
Something else had come up.
Nathan’s silence did not go unnoticed and Sebastian turned toward him, leaning sideways against the fence with a concerned look in his eyes. He did not need to say anything– and neither did Nathan, as he slowly pulled his hands out of his pockets and removed one of his black, leather gloves.
The pale top of his left hand had a burned appearance, as if fire had scorched away skin and flesh– the wound only partially healed leaving it broken and torn clinging closely to his veins and bones. Though despite how recent he had received the scar, its appearance instead implied years long possession, and despite its severity it did not hurt at all.
He could tell by the look on Sebastian’s face the scar reminded him of someone.
‘Now, I know what you’re gonna say–’ Nathan started, but Sebastian cut him off.
‘I can’t do this, Nathan. I have a daughter–’
‘–I know.’
His voice came out a lot sharper than he had meant for.
‘I’m not asking anything of you,’ he said, his heartbeat pounding in the back of his throat.
‘Not this time.’
It had started as police radio chatter.
Late in the afternoon, Nathan had already been getting ready to go home. Kid had picked up a mention of Beacon– its doors long closed for the public yet the building remained in the heart of Krimson City, left to rot and wither away– supposed ghostly activity reported within its decaying walls, and she had wanted to investigate.
Nathan sharply exhaled and put his glove back on, exposed fingers growing numb in the freezing winter air. He leaned forward with his arms on the fence, to move a little closer to Sebastian; as if he was afraid someone would overhear them, as if they could make sense out of any of it to begin with.
‘He’s back, Sebastian,’ he defeatedly stated, and the other man lowered his gaze. ‘I saw him. He did this to me.’
‘Impossible.’
‘Wish it was.’
Despite hearing many tales, and having worked on his project for years as developer within the MOBIUS branch he had been part of, Nathan had never seen or met Ruvik face to face. The brilliant mind behind the STEM technology had always remained in the shadows; up until his death, after which his brain had become the core of MOBIUS’ very first STEM device.
Naturally so, when Nathan had run into the man while wandering the abandoned hallways of Beacon, his first assumption had been that he was asleep– followed by a brief moment of panic in which he had believed he was dead, or somehow back in STEM.
But Ruvik had touched him– had forcefully grabbed his hand to make him drop his gun and had left a burn similar to his own scars– and had then vanished the second Kidman had yelled out Nathan’s name, the old and presumed broken STEM device in the room next door whirring and humming as if it had never been deactivated in the first place.
‘I’m here to warn you,’ Nathan softly continued, eyes fixed on a random spot in the bright snow covering the playground and thumb absently running over the gloved back of his scarred hand.
‘We don’t know yet what exactly he’s here for, what exactly he’s tryin’ to do. Investigating as we speak, but– shit’s looking serious. Somehow reverse engineered the STEM signal to reach outward, expand into reality. Push itself out rather than draw people in.’
‘Meaning?’
‘Similar to the wireless connection that pulled you into STEM the first time round, but– without being pulled in.’ Nathan had to bite his tongue to stop himself from getting too technical. ‘An– An active environment in our world, if you follow, rather than on the device’s mainframe. Signal seems to be inactive still, but we’re gettin’ the readings. No idea how he’s planning to activate it yet.’
They had moved the device to their own headquarters, on the outskirts of town. Had needed to connect it to the second prototype– the device that had supported the Union environment, which they had taken from MOBIUS’ headquarters after wiping out its agents– in order to gain access to the mainframe, get any data extracted from it in the first place.
Their initial hope had been that it was nothing more than echoes– malfunctions in the STEM device caused by neglect promptly activating the wireless signal allowing shades from within to wander the Beacon hallways– anything but Ruvik’s actual return, however that was even possible–
‘Daddy!’
Nathan blinked, drawn out of his thoughts by Lily’s voice. He watched her run over to the two of them– the front of her coat, face, and hair completely covered in snow and a bright smile on her face as she attempted to wipe some of it from her forehead, but if anything her mittens just further spread it out.
‘I’m getting cold,’ she said, squinting when Sebastian reached out to help her with the snow. ‘Can we go back home soon?’
‘Of course honey,’ he replied, barely able to mask the exhaustion in his voice now that Nathan had explained the situation to him– and for a brief moment it was as if they were back in Union, radioing back to Kidman from the momentary safety of one of their established safehouses. ‘Don’t want you catching a cold.’
Lily looked up at Nathan and smiled at him– but she was a smart kid, and he watched her expression change as she looked back up at her father, head slightly tilting before she shook it to get some strands of her ink black hair out of her face, the single white strand in her bangs– matching Nathan’s own– a grim and constant reminder of her mother’s fate.
‘Is everything alright?’ she asked, and Nathan couldn’t help but wonder if she still associated him with MOBIUS, if she still associated him with the tests and experiments they put her through and if she still associated him with the STEM device, meeting one another within in some facility in the Marrow where he was forced to watch over her like a vulture at all times, all to keep the system stable.
‘Nothing to worry about,’ he simply answered her, unsure if she would fall for his lie, but knowing it would give her infinitely more comfort than the truth ever could. ‘Just came to say hi.’
The breeze picked up, howling loudly in Nathan’s ears as if the whole city softly cried for him; the cold boring its way through his clothes and eating away at his skin, exposed or not, freezing him all the way down to the bone. He lowered his head– a futile attempt at shielding his face from the biting wind and snow, individual snowflakes cutting like knives across his forehead and cheekbones.
He watched Lily smile at both him and Sebastian again before running off to get back to the snowball fight for just a bit longer, diving behind the slide to get cover. His gaze was pulled back toward Sebastian– but said man appeared deep in thought, eyes pointedly fixed on something in the distance, head anywhere but in the present.
‘I gotta go back in,’ Nathan quietly continued; an unnecessary statement, the gravity of the situation like static in the air between the two of them, though to put it into words was to accept the harsh reality of it all– acknowledgement of what had to happen, what was going to happen, something he had not been able to do before.
‘It’s nothing like Union,’ Sebastian bluntly replied with a shake of his head, turning his back to the playground and resting heavily with his elbows on the fence. ‘He’s nothing like Stefano– nothing like Theodore. He doesn’t need a weapon or a core to draw his powers from, you get too close and it’s over. You understand?’
Nathan didn’t know what else to say.
He had never thought he’d have to go back into STEM after Union. He’d be alone this time round– no Sebastian by his side, no Kidman to radio back to. They had reconnected some old friends– Joseph, Yukiko, Esmeralda– but had no idea whether or not their consciousnesses would still be somewhere within STEM, and for all Nathan knew he would be diving into a world entirely of Ruvik’s creation, with the same horrifying creatures haunting it as last time, if not worse.
Of course he was terrified. All it took was one encounter with Anima and he would never see the light of day ever again.
‘You should go,’ Nathan said, pushing himself up from the fence and stuffing his hands back in the pockets of his coat, ‘get out of town while you still can. Grab a bag or two, grab Lily, take her on a– on a road trip up north or something, while we figure this out. Just in case he–’
He couldn’t finish his sentence. The thought of Ruvik succeeding and trapping the world in a constant state of STEM was something he would rather not think about.
‘–you know.’
An uncomfortable silence followed. And rightfully so– what else was there to say? The whole situation was ridiculous to begin with, and for Nathan to show up only now instead of at any other point in time, months of radio silence after nearly dying together in a simulation of reality lingering between real life and a dream–
He carefully watched as Sebastian shifted his weight from one foot to the other, able to study his face for longer now that the other man refused to make eye contact with him. He truly did look a lot better; Nathan could only assume the man had stopped drinking, and had been getting a much better night’s sleep.
Though despite the improvement in his appearance there was still that lingering sense of dread, the dark shadow that had washed over his face the second he had laid eyes on Nathan’s scarring and had realized what he had come to him for.
Nathan couldn’t blame him. But he’d had to let Sebastian know.
He licked his lips and nodded to no one in particular, ending the conversation himself by taking a small step back and turning back around to return to his car, drive home, drink himself blind and pass out to hopefully get some sleep in before he would have to dive back into his worst nightmare–
‘Hey.’
Sebastian’s hand on his upper arm was unexpected and Nathan hated how he could not stop himself from flinching, a reflex more than anything else, and he hated how it made Sebastian pull his hand away as if he’d touched fire, the tips of his fingers on Nathan’s body despite the layers he wore the first physical contact he had experienced in months.
‘Who is “we”?’ Sebastian quietly asked, briefly glancing behind him to see if Lily was still far enough away. A surprising question; though not out of character for the ex-detective, his curiosity piqued just enough for him to try and get a little more information out of Nathan before they would say goodbye and possibly never see each other again.
‘Me,’ Nathan plainly answered, ‘Juli. Used to be just us two but we gathered a team of old STEM developers to help us with this. They got moved on to other projects while we were working on Union– they removed their chips, came back for us.’
‘So all MOBIUS.’
Not even a question, simply a statement.
Nathan bit the inside of his cheek. ‘Ex MOBIUS.’
The atmosphere changed, a sharp tension bouncing between the two of them as Nathan straightened his back and lightly tilted up his chin. He couldn’t exactly place the look on the other man’s face, though by then knew him well enough to know his hesitation wasn’t caused by uncertainty, but moreso distrust.
‘Thought the program was meant to kill them all,’ Sebastian said, a somewhat hostile undertone in his voice that had not been there before.
‘Just our branch.’ Nathan paused, watching as Sebastian slowly nodded and mouthed a soundless “right”– not entirely sure what his reaction was supposed to mean, but he decided not to ask. ‘Already told you it runs a lot deeper than you thought.’
Myra's sacrifice had put an end to the Administrator's reign of terror– had destroyed his legacy, and all research and findings on the STEM system as designed by Ruvik and improved by MOBIUS. Whichever branches remained did not nearly have enough resources or knowledge to pull off something even remotely similar; and whatever scraps of code they could have gotten their hands on before Kidman and Nathan had wiped their systems clean would prove insufficient to provide them with a stable environment.
And even if they would make it that far– provided they’d be able to recreate the STEM device from written instructions alone, Ruvik's original blueprints lost to time and MOBIUS' own burned to a crisp in the aftermath of the Union incident's conclusion– the mental erosion Union's residents had suffered from and the Anima manifestations that had happened as a result had never been resolved, leaving any future STEM residents with the all but comforting promise of a similar fate.
'I'm diving in tomorrow,' Nathan said, knowing there was nothing else left to say. The breeze in the park was picking up again, sweeping snowflakes that were starting to feel more like hail than anything else into Nathan’s face with a lot more force than before, melting on collision and dripping into the collar of his shirt. 'First thing in the morning. Can’t waste any more time. In case you wanna come say goodbye–'
He reached into the pocket of his pants, then held out a note to Sebastian; handwritten, containing an address located on an abandoned warehouse site, not too far from Nathan's own home.
'–our headquarters.' He waited for Sebastian to take the note from him. 'No pressure, of course.'
No pressure.
The note was almost a blatant sign that Nathan wanted him to be there. He could not ask it of him directly– but gave him the option anyway, leaving the decision up to Sebastian instead.
But deep down Nathan knew that Sebastian knew that he really did not want to go back in alone– and if it had been up to him they had recruited Sebastian a week ago already, when things had first started to go wrong.
‘Do you have backup?’ Sebastian softly asked, as if he could look directly into Nathan’s head– asking the one question he had hoped for, with an answer to it that could easily enough change Sebastian’s mind about letting Nathan walk away if only he would play his cards right–
But despite how often he had practiced the entire conversation alone in his car, despite going over all the different things he could say at least a million times, just to get Sebastian to feel sorry for him– as selfish as it fucking was– Nathan found himself unable to speak.
He simply shook his head instead.
The other children and their parents were leaving, now. It was getting late, and colder, and Lily slowly wandered back to Sebastian to start dragging him back to the car if he were to take any longer than he already had.
Nathan looked up at the sky, eyes fluttering shut as he allowed more snow to drift down onto his ice cold skin, and he breathed in and out deeply before turning back to Sebastian.
‘They’re expecting more snowfall tonight,’ he said, locking eyes for only a split second and shooting a smile in his direction, as he began walking backwards into the direction of his car. ‘Don’t wait up. And– Drive safe, okay?’
Sebastian did not answer him.
It snowed in Krimson City, accompanied by a deafening silence weighing it down and choking it out, as if the whole city was expectantly holding its breath.
Nathan left.
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#nuclearwriting#kinda nervous posting this and also genuinely don't know if i'll keep writing because i haven't actually written much more yet LOL#i do really wanna work more on this because it's just nice to have for myself. but i'm definitely not gonna do the one chapter a week#that i used to do for king of fools. i don't know how i managed to do that like genuinely don't ask me#but yeas hi =] nathan introduction <3 obviously he and sebastian have already worked together during tew2 but i didn't feel like#writing about all of that just because it's basically what happens in the game except nathan is there. commenting on everything#this is the first part of the story where he gets to actually lead a bit more himself rather than just following sebastian around#and most of it will be written from his perspective if i do end up writing more =]#if i did my math and timeline right nathan did in fact already work for mobius when ruvik was still alive. so logically they could have met#but they didn't... closest nathan got was when he led the operation to burn the victoriano estate down after ruvik was killed#and then he wasn't there for beacon so he didn't experience any of that. and obviously in union ruvik wasn't there#so him running into ruvik as described in this chapter is the very first time they came face to face with each other ^_^
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well I did finish the vampire lestat.
#I thought the rockstar chapters at the end were fun but also kind of bad because they kind of undermined what she was doing in#the book before that. I think anne just didn’t quite figure out how to end the book. idk.#but it was also obviously trying to set up a sequel. not particularly in a way that I enjoyed.#also crazy that it took me 2 months to read the beautifully rendered first 500 pages and 5 days to read the boring/plot heavy/less strong#250 pages that followed#text#well I do still have lots of thoughts from those first 500 pages saved in my drafts. and if I’m not lazy I’ll post them some time I suppose
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should i draw one of those meet the artist things one of these days ,,
#hina.txt#i always want to do stuff like this but end up never getting around to it#so much more interesting stuff to draw than Myself fyjttgjkh#but i have gotten a surge in followers recently (waves awkwardly hiiii) n thought maybe it cld b fun? idk#depending on how emotionally devastated i am after tmr's chapter we'll see if i want to do Anything gjfgksdf#holding strong holding strong ANYWAY
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so, like... do you think Sorata is actually pushing to swap the main couple in AnS to Obi and Shirayuki? I know that being in this corner of the fandom imparts some bias and that ships don't have to be canon to be good, but Shirayuki and Zen have seen each other, what, twice in the past 50 chapters? It doesn't really seem like she's terribly interested in maintaining their dynamic.
It has been forever since I had the chance to dig into my asks, so let the record show, this ask came to me pre-ch 136, and I'm glad I sat on it because I think I would have given a much more equivocal response in August, and now I'm like:
Sorata did not give us 28 pages of Obi feelings for me to doubt her now 🤣
#asks#obiyuki#ans#listen could it still be zen & shirayuki in the end? absolutely#sorata is a great visual storyteller and I feel like even if that's the case#i'll be happy with how she leads me there even if I wanted obiyuki in the end#but like...she literally had every reason to keep zen there and then sent him away anyway#after he literally engineered this meeting between them#zen & shirayuki haven't been getting development like this either. like most of their story happened in the first 20 chapters#and every step forward they have Shirayuki tends to put a stop on a few seconds in#they haven't done FEELINGS stuff in so long. and meanwhile we're getting this big arc#of obi learning he has worth. that he has something to give her that isn't acting as Zen's tool or her bodyguard#like. the REUNION. the calling each other home. the date with canon tomomi where shirayuki (and zen) freak out over#shirayuki stopping to tell him that he looks good in firelight and following it up with how he's the reason#that she had the courage to stay at lilias. THE WHOLE FAKE DATING ARC. and now this???#we're getting a much bigger story with them. and as we've seen with mistuhide/kiki/hisame#she is looking not for easy ships but the story to get them there#could this still just be her developing an important platonic relationship? sure. but there's been a LOT of focus#on Obi's feelings for that to be the case#so WE'LL SEE
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I was going share a wip snippet of the mafia update that’s almost done, but I realized it’s too spicy 😆
#don’t want to shock my followers#teen wolf#theo raeken#liam dunbar#thiam#thiam fanfic#teen wolf thiam#🌚#idk how we ended up here in this chapter#🔥#ao3 fanfic#ao3 writer#a03 writer#love is a twisted dance of shadows#mafia au
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One thing I like about Reverse 1999 is how the game tells different perspectives about potentially controversial topics that are commonly portrayed as negative in mainstream narrations not because inherently bad but rather because any depth is quickly dismissed. I am thinking about 1.6 event in regards to alcohol drinking (and prohibitionism), 1.8 event concerning communism (its true ideals and utopia), 1.9 story and nihilism (in its often overlooked positive connotation)
#i could rant for hours about what a great depiction of positive nihilism the apeiron believers who follow 6 until the very end are#and how well the whole story of the island was written starting from the prisoner in the cave chapter#anyway#i love this game#reverse 1999#r1999
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A Court of Shadows and Blood Chapter 3
The hallways are carved out of pale stone, lined on either side by torches. No shadowy spots to hide. It's a wide open space, but she barely has the chance to appreciate the details. The eery silence that reigns in there is only interupted by the echo of her hurried steps as she runs.
She doesn’t know where she’s going. Every hallway looks the same. She’s taken several turns already, but can’t, for the life of her, figure out where she is.
But there’s no other option. She has to keep running and hope she finds a way out—or else stay locked up until the monster tires of her and ends her life. Especially now that she’s given him very good reasons to do so.
Nothing has gone as it should since she left for the Wall. Nesta thought that embarking on a life-threatening journey to rescue Feyre was the craziest thing she’d ever do.
Until she was captured by a Fae made of deadly shadows and locked in his opulent room. Until she tried to strangle that same Fae with her bare hands. Until she chained him to his own bed with the very metal that had once been locked around her ankle.
Nesta isn’t naïve enough to believe it will hold him down forever. He’s an ancient being, filled with power. She doesn’t know how, but she can feel it—perhaps the same way she can see through spells.
'Have you ever witnessed something really strange that you had no explanation for, but no one else noticed? Things that just didn't make sense in your mind?'
He obviously knows the reason. It unsettles her deeply that he’s aware of some hidden part of herself, something she doesn’t even fully understand. For someone to know you like that is dangerous. She learnt that the hard way, long ago.
She skids around a corner, nearly slipping as she pushes forward, her pulse drumming louder than her footsteps. The torches flicker as she passes, shadows trailing her like phantoms.
She thinks of Feyre, her sister’s face flashing in her mind, and she clenches her fists, gritting her teeth. Nesta will get out of this wretched place and find her, somehow. She will drag her back home, away from these monsters and this godforsaken land.
That thought pushes her fear down and drives her forward. The iron poker burns her hands as she grips it harder—it’s the only weapon she could find in that room. She’s been planning her escape ever since those hellish shadowy creatures spawned in the room and dragged her from the bed.
She had no way of knowing what time it was, only that she’d been sleeping shortly before they arrived. She’d dreamed of Feyre, of Elain, and for a moment, all was well. Then the dream twisted into a nightmare of black claws pinning her to the bed by her throat, choking her slowly as they dug into her skin. A pair of violet eyes stared at her with cruel amusement while blood trickled down her neck. She tried to move, but her body wouldn’t respond. It was all pain, darkness, pure agony.
She woke up drenched in sweat, gasping for air. Her eyes took in the room, fixing on the orange flames crackling in the fireplace. She buried her face in her hands and, for the first time since she’d left, she sobbed.
She had already stopped by the time those Fae materialized in front of her, her eyes still red and puffy. They were made of shadows and floated around the room, their features barely discernable, save for their loose, flowing cobweb gowns. They didn't say a word even when they reached for her. She tried to fight them off, get their cold inhuman hands off her, but to no avail. The grip around her forearms remained firm.
She knew exactly who had sent them. Shadows were obviously his domain. One of them crouched down, tugged at the chain a couple of times, and unlocked it, freeing her ankle from its weight. The relief was short-lived, though, as they dragged her across the room and into a nondescript chamber, where they stripped her bare and bathed her roughly.
The sensation of hands tearing away her clothes and touching her skin stirred panic and fury, making her lash out in an attempt to push them off. But it was useless. The two shadows forced her to stay still in the tub as they scrubbed her. Then they wrapped her in a thin robe and, to her confusion, began to paint her face and brush her hair.
Their brushes were cold and tickling, their shadowy grips firm whenever she squirmed. They didn’t speak, offering no explanation for their actions—though Nesta had no doubt it was yet another sick game of that bastard.
When they were finished, she hardly recognized her reflection. She looked regal, reminiscent of the noble girl she’d once been. Her face was artfully decorated with cosmetics that subtly enhanced her features, just enough to suit a lady’s propriety.
The shadows didn’t stop there, of course. They seized her again, wrapping her in a dress. It was tight around her torso and flowed loosely toward the ground, cascading over her legs like a sea of stars. The design was unlike anything she’d ever worn—or would have if she had a choice.
"What’s this? Why are you…?" But before she could finish, they dragged her back to the bed, locked the chain around her ankle once more, and vanished as soon as they did so.
She was alone again, processing what had just happened. In their absence, she could feel the nightmare flooding back—the suffocation, the pain, the raw terror as she was killed, again and again. Those violet eyes full of evil.
Nesta decided she couldn’t stay there any longer, trapped as a plaything for these faeries, awaiting her inevitable demise at their hands. She would not let that nightmare become her reality.
Hit with a surge of determination and desperation, Nesta grabbed the metal chain with both hands and began pulling at it repeatedly. Her hands ached, her ankle throbbed, but she didn’t stop. She ignored everything but the relentless clink of the metal as she tried to tear it free, focusing on the sound it made when she tugged at certain angles.
Finally, the cold air hit the raw skin of her ankle, and the chain fell to the ground. She almost sobbed again.
But she wasn’t done. Carefully, she set one foot on the floor, testing her strength. Her eyes shifted to the poker by the fireplace, lying close enough to the flames to sear anyone’s skin if touched on the wrong side. Faeries have skin, too, after all. And it's not so much different from human's, if her experience with her hands around someone's throat were anything to go by.
She began to formulate her plan right there. It was very risky, downright suicidal, but at that point she was ready to try anything for her freedom. So she returned to the bed, hid the chain under the skirt and waited for him.
She still can't believe it worked.
Another turn. Her lungs burn, and the air feels thicker, heavier, with each step. She’s in a maze meant to ensnare her, to lead her back to where she started, drive her to insanity. Her thoughts race, searching for any sense of direction, any logic in this place.
But nothing about it makes sense. Seems to be the rule of the faerie world.
She rounds another corner and stops dead. Ahead, two guards are stationed at the end of the hall, clad in dark armor that reflects none of the torchlight. They haven't seen her yet, too engrossed in their conversation.
Nesta takes a step back and presses her back against the wall beneath it, concealing her body with the shadows. Sucking in deep breaths behind her mouth, she glances back down the corridor. They're still there, seemingly unaware of her presence.
She wonders how it works. Don't faeries smell humans from miles away? That's the only explanation on how her captor found her the way he did. And she knows by what he said that he could, in fact, smell her like a piece of meat. But these guards haven't so much as glanced in her direction. ¿Maybe not all faeries can sense humans?
She tries to make out pieces of what they're talking about. Their voices are the only sound in the hallway, so it's easy for her to listen. Perhap she can hear something useful, a hint to leave this place.
"...to leave. He's...bad mood."
"...prick. Almost worse...other."
"Waiting...company."
They chuckle. A sound so unnerving it makes her skin crawl.
"Vanserra...most dangerous."
Vanserra. A name. It means nothing to her, but they way they say it carries a certain air of authority. Whoever it is, it's someone they have to obey.
Her mind is running through multiple possibilities, strategies to proceed. She has to act now. Every minute she spends here without moving is more time for that monster to find her. She's not that foolish to think the iron poker in her hand will stop him.
Suddenly, the guards begin to move towards her and Nesta's blood runs cold. She turns, sprinting down another passageway, uncaring that they surely heard her now.
She’s running blind again, every hallway an endless stretch of pale stone and torchlight. Her mind flits back to the Fae chained in his bed, his rage as he realized what she’d done. She’s not sure if she’s more terrified of his revenge or the despair of knowing she might never escape this place. That it was all for nothing.
The hall narrows, and ahead, she catches a dim glimmer. She sprints toward it, pressing her hands against the wall. There's a slight fissure in the rock, opening onto a crudely carved, dark subterranean passageway. It's large enough for one person to squeeze through—so jagged and rough that it's obviously not used often.
It’s deathly silent, with a faint, warm breeze whistling through. The sound of footsteps and angry shouts approaching spurs her into action; she squeezes herself into a narrow opening, holding her breath to fit. She remains perfectly still as the guards pass her hiding spot. When their footsteps fade, she moves on. The iron rod scrapes against the stone, and she almost feels sorry for the high-quality fabric of the dress getting ruined. Almost.
The passageway narrows, forcing her to suck in her stomach to keep moving. The smell of burning wood reaches her nose, and distant sounds—voices—grow clearer. Light seeps through cracks in the stone, giving her glimpses of the other side.
Bedrooms. This passageway connects to other fae’s bedrooms. She wants to scream.
Nesta closes her eyes for a moment, steeling herself. She can’t fall apart now. She's already here. Turning back is not an option anymore. And she has to find Feyre.
She keeps moving. The voices fade, and her body bumps into a solid wall. The smell of burning wood is stronger now, drifting from just beyond it.
She presses her hands against the wall, pushing with all her strength until it slides aside. A hidden door, then. As soon as she steps out, it closes behind her.
Before her it's a magnificent bedroom, entirely different from the one she was locked in, yet equally beautiful.
The color scheme is rich in golds and reds, with warm orange hues. Another king-sized bed stands at the center, adorned with exquisite bed linens embroidered in flame-like patterns. The posts are made of real gold, and the fire blazing in the enormous hearth beside it casts an ethereal glow across the room. A large, intricately carved wardrobe stands nearby, its surface adorned with thorny patterns. A small desk is cluttered with scattered papers and books, yet looks as expensive as everything else.
If Nesta were asked to describe it, she’d say this room is made of fire and fury. It radiates a palpable power, as though the very walls are steeped in the essence of whoever resides here. The heat from the fire makes her skin prickle, and a strange, welcome warmth settles over her, seeping into her bones.
She walks around slowly, eyes scanning for exits. She notes a large set of double doors to her right—likely the main entrance—and a smaller, inconspicuous door to the left. Her heartbeat quickens, calculating the odds.
But then she hears faint footsteps, muffled but approaching. Her gaze darts to the wardrobe, and without another thought, she darts toward it, slipping inside just as the door swings open. She presses herself against the back of the wardrobe, the scent of polished wood and faintly spiced cologne surrounding her. Through the crack between the doors, she watches.
A figure steps inside, tall and imposing, dressed in an elegant jacket of scarlet and gold. His movements are fluid, controlled. His gaze sweeps over the room, his expression sharp and focused, as if he senses something amiss.
Nesta holds her breath, willing herself invisible. She grips the iron poker with both hands, ready to pounce.
The Fae moves to the bed, then over to the fireplace, seemingly lost in thought. His fingers trail along the desk, tracing patterns on the scattered papers. And then, he turns on his back and leaves. The sound of doors closing resonate in the room.
Nesta waits until she's sure he's gone. She steps out of the wardrobe carefully, glancing in both directions. Her heart pounds so hard she can feel it in her throat.
Standing in the middle of the room, she watches the flames flicker. Their light reflects off her dress, casting an orange glow that transforms the fabric into the hues of a sunset rather than a night sky. She likes it better.
Suddenly, the flames sink in size and she barely has time to react before she feels a strong hand grabbing her by the arm, grip iron-clad.
"Well, well" a voice low and silk-smooth drawls in her ear, breath hot against her skin. "What do we have here? A little bird who..."
Nesta doesn't even think it.
She whips around and swings the poker, the sharp, burning end aimed blindly at him.
The iron rod connects, glancing off his arm before he jerks back with a low, furious hiss. She stumbles, nearly losing her grip on the poker, but she doesn’t let go. Instead, she takes a shaky step back, holding it between them like a weapon. Her pulse pounds like thunder, her gaze locked on the Fae.
The flames leap higher in the fireplace as he steadies himself, one hand cradling his injured arm. His face twists, not in pain but in something sharper, colder—a kind of restrained fury that makes her blood run cold.
"Quite the little fighter, aren’t you?" he says, his voice low and dripping with dark amusement, though his eyes burn with ire. "I assume you're not the female I was expecting tonight."
He speaks in a unfamiliar accent, different from the other Fae man she knows. His voice is rich and deep in a way that would be attractive in an human man, but coming from someone like him, Nesta refuses to feel anything.
Just by looking at him she knows he’s of the same status—or close—to her captor. He’s taller than any man she’s ever met, with dark red hair perfectly cut over his nape and amber eyes that resemble two flaming orbs. He's dressed even more elegantly than the other bastard, and Nesta has the knowledge to see he has a refined taste and takes pride in his appearance.
Not to mention she can practically feel the power thrumming off him, as palpable as the fire’s warmth at her back. This is no ordinary fae—he’s one of the important kind. The masters.
And this is his bedroom.
Nesta feels the urge to scream again.
He huffs, releasing his injured arm, and she catches sight of a thin trail of blood trickling down his elegantly stitched sleeve. It’s a dark shade of red—almost black—a stark reminder that he’s not human, but a monster.
She holds the iron rod between them, keeping it firmly pressed against his chest, though she knows it’s futile. The sharp end digs in, and he raises an eyebrow, glancing from the poker to her with a look of faint bewilderment.
"Who are you?" it takes everything within her to keep her voice steady.
He snorts. "I believe I should be the one asking that, birdie. This is my bedroom."
Nesta bites her lips, her pulse beating in her ears. He doesn't look threatening, but that doesn't mean he's safe. Yet there's something oddly comforting about this room, about its aura. She can't explain it, but it just feels alluring to her. Just like the man in front of her.
'Focus, you idiot. He's not a man. He's a predator.'
She straightens her spine, trying to appear taller and more confident than she truly feels. She’s no fighter, despite the iron rod clenched in her fingers. Her weapons have always been her words—and she doesn't know to what extent they're useful against faeries.
The fae draws a twisted grin, his fire eyes gleaming with menace.
"How interesting," he takes a step closer to her, the iron pressing further into his chest. "I wasn't aware the Night court kept human pets now."
The fury that flares up at being called "pet" dims in confusion as she processes his words. ¿Night Court? Is that where that fae of shadows comes from?
The red-haired fae picks up on her shock instantly, his grin widening as if he’s uncovered something amusing and entirely to his advantage.
"Oh?" he drawls, a hint of mockery in his voice. "Don’t tell me you didn’t even know? You're dressed like one of them. A wonder we haven't heard of you." He says the last part more to himself, as though she’s little more than a spectator to his thoughts.
Nesta grits her teeth, keeping her grip on the poker tight. "I don’t care about that. I only want to leave."
The fae’s expression shifts, some trace of real interest sparking in his eyes, though his amusement remains. "Leave? And where exactly would you go, little mortal? This place isn’t exactly known for its... hospitality to uninvited guests. Specially if they're humans. She has a...let's say strong dislike for your kind."
He lifts his fingers to trace the iron rod lightly, as though inspecting it. "Besides, did no one tell you it’s rather rude to wander into another male’s chambers?" His tone drips with sarcasm, but Nesta catches the veiled threat in his words.
She truly has the worst luck in the world. Jumping from one sick bastard to another. ¿When will this end?
Nesta’s pulse races. She can feel the power simmering just beneath his polished exterior, as potent as the fae she’s managed to escape from. Her hand tightens on the rod as she meets his gaze defiantly. "You didn’t answer my question. Who are you?"
For a moment, he simply stares at her, the smirk fading as he watches her face with sharp, unreadable eyes. Then, he inclines his head in a graceful bow.
"Call me Eris," he says, voice low and almost purring. "And you, little bird?"
Nesta hesitates. Giving her name to a Fae is a horrible idea, or so she's been taught. But she also thought iron could hurt them and she saw her captor holding it with his own hands to chain her. She's not sure what to do.
But he's given her something more than the other male has. So maybe she can allow herself to be a bit nice.
"I'll tell you if you let me out of here," she replies after a beat, keeping her chin high.
Eris’s smile returns, smug and unbelieving, as if he’s found something truly valuable. "Seriously?" he repeats, letting a short huff of amusement. "I just gave you mine. It's not fair I don't get to know yours."
Her eyes narrow. "You could be lying to me for all I know. Some knowledge is dangerous in the wrong hands."
He stares at her. The corner of his mouth twitches.
"I agree," he clasps his hands behind him, leaning forward. The end of the poker cutting slightly through his exquisite jacket. He doesn't seem to care. "So pray tell, why should I let you leave after telling you my name, mhm? It's dangerous knowledge, after all."
She tenses.
"What could I possibly do against you? I'm just a human."
He takes a step closer to her.
"A human dressed like a member of the Night court, who just intruded in my bedroom with a weapon. Forgive me for being a bit skeptical."
His gaze never leaves hers, and though Nesta tries to keep her stance steady, she feels herself shrinking back involuntarily. His body is on the way to her exit, but it dawns to her that, even if she managed to get pass him by some miracle, there could be more faes outside.
She doesn't have time to think that far ahead. She needs to act now.
The fire cracks behind her, the comforting smell of burning wood caressing her nose. She can do this.
"Please, I just want to go home." Fighting back hasn’t worked so far, so maybe playing the role of a pitiful, scared human will "He kidnapped me, kept me locked in his room like a beast. I escaped by sheer miracle, but I know he's looking for me now."
His eyebrows rise briefly, a flicker of surprise crossing his features before it vanishes, replaced by an unimpressed stare. If Nesta wasn't so well versed in those same tactics, she would've missed it.
She knows Fae look down on her kind, see them as inferior beings. If she plays on that role, she might get the upper hand here.
Eris watches her, the flickering firelight casting his sharp features in a golden glow. His smirk fades and his eyes narrow slightly, as though he’s debating whether or not to believe her tale.
"How exactly did you escape? I know he wouldn't have let you go so easily. And there's no way you could've overpower him."
Shit. He’s cornering her with that question. If she tells him the truth—that she outwitted a powerful fae and chained him to the bed—there’s a risk he’ll see her as a genuine threat and act accordingly. Or worse, he won’t believe her at all. And hand her over to her captor.
Everything's been a risk since she got out of that room. She can't falter. Not now. Not when might be so close to freedom.
"When his servants came to dress me, they unlocked the chain, and forgot to lock it again when they left. I saw an opportunity. I grabbed the poker and ran away before he returned." she sighs. "I almost got caught by some guards, so I hid. That's how I ended up here."
He hums, looking at her in silence, as if pushing her to continue.
"Please, I beg you, let me go. My s...family need me. I must find them. I promise I won't tell anyone about this place. Ever. I just...let me go home."
As she talks, she realizes it's not an act anymore. Every word comes straight out of her heart, her raw emotions. She misses her home deeply, misses her sisters. She must save Feyre from that monster's claws and bring her back home. Her eyes grow misty against her will, but she's too weary to feel asshamed.
She only wants this nightmare to end.
The fae doesn't say anything. Not a sound comes out of him. Nesta doesn't dare to look at his face.
"Home, you say?" His voice drips with an emotion she can't identify. "You really think that's an option for you now? That's why you went through all that trouble? Sweet Mother, I forgot how blissfully unaware mortals are of everything around them." He looks away, his expression serious, contrasting greatly to how he's been acting until now. "And what, pray tell, is it you intend to do once you’re back in your quaint little life? Forget this ever happened? Forget this place? Him?" His tone lowers, his words taunting. "Do you truly believe a creature like him will let you escape unscathed?"
Nesta's blood freezes, her head throbbing. The grip around the iron rod begins to tremble.
"There must be a way, I know it..."
"Let's suppose I let you out of here. What then?" he interrupts her, insisting. Taking her apart. "Do you have any idea where you are right now? How to navigate this place? You don't. Bet you don't even know where the entrance is. You don't have a plan, am I right? Risked your sorry life for nothing."
Nesta moves before her common sense can't stop it. She swings the iron rod again, narrowly missing his side as he sidesteps.
Eris laughs, a sharp, delighted sound, even as he raises his hands in mock surrender. "Oh, you're fun. I like you."
"Shut up. You're a powerful fae, I can feel it. There has to be a way you can help me here. What do I have to do?"
Eris’s smile returns, smug and predatory, as if he’s found what he was looking for.
"Well, I can think of a few ways you can...persuade me to help."
Nesta already recognizes this tone, resisting the urge to roll her eyes and the shiver all through her back. Maybe she should try to aim for the head this time.
"Not that, you disgusting pervert." She grits her teeth.
Eris hums, his expression unreadable as he steps even closer, close enough now that the heat of his body mixes with the warmth of the fire behind her. "How brave of you to say that. Or just suicidal. I can't decide."
Nesta holds her ground, though her instincts scream at her to back away. She won’t cower—not yet. She tilts her chin up, meeting his fiery gaze head-on. "I repeat. I’m no threat to you. If you're not going to help me, then let me go, and you won’t have to deal with me ever again."
Eris laughs, low and rich, the sound reverberating through the room and her body. "You misunderstand, birdie. I don’t 'have' to deal with you. I’m choosing to."
His hand reaches out, catching her wrist with infuriating ease as he gently pulls the poker from her grip. He lets it clatter to the ground, his hand still wrapped around her wrist, firm but not painful. "And now I’m wondering…" He leans in, close enough that she can feel the heat radiating off him. "Why the High Lord of the Night Court went to such lengths to dress you up like his prize, only to let you slip away."
Her pulse pounds in her ears, but she forces her voice steady. "I’m no one’s prize."
Eris’s lips twitch, his grip tightening just slightly. "No, you’re not. You're a pet." he murmurs. "But I think there's something more of you than that. And I really want to find out."
His free hand raises toward her face, and Nesta reacts without thinking. She stomps down on his foot with all her strength, yanking her wrist free as his grip loosens.
But before she can grab the iron rod again, his whole face changes. It’s almost imperceptible, but she notices it, and it makes her wary.
He tilts his head to the side, as if listening to something outside. She watches him, his sudden change in behavior unsettling her enough to keep quiet. The faint tension in his posture, the way his eyes flicker toward the door, and the tilt of his head, as if straining to hear something beyond the thick walls. It sets her on edge.
Her heart pounds in her chest, the icy claws of unease curling around her spine. Whatever—or whoever—has his attention, it makes him pause. And that, more than anything, terrifies her.
A cold, horrifying though comes to her. ¿Could it be him? Has he found her at last?
Suddenly, he turns his head at her with an intense stare. Something flicker in his eyes, and he's frowning. He looks at her as if he's conflicted. ¿Why?
He grabs her harshly by the arms, but not enough to hurt, and basically lifts her up in the air. She doesn't have time to protest before he presses a hand against the wall where she came from and...pushes it open like nothing. Like he does it regularly.
He shoves her inside and gives her a stern look of warning.
"Leave the way you came," he instructs, his tone firm but distracted. "Once you're out, keep your right hand pressed to the wall and follow it. It’ll take you where you need to go. Don’t run, don’t make a sound, and above all, avoid the shadows. They’re not safe." He turns his head to the door again in a pissed off gesture. "And one more thing."
He grabs her wrist, and Nesta feels the cool weight of something pressed into her palm. She looks down.
A knife. Crafted from gold and ash wood.
"That will hurt a Fae far more than burning iron," he says evenly. "Keep it with you at all times. Even a light touch of it will have them writhing in pain."
She can barely process what's happening. Everything feels too fast, his words too cryptic.
"Why are you doing this? What's going on?"
The glare he shoots her makes her breath hitch.
"He's here."
Her chest tightens as her heartbeat thunders painfully against her ribs, each beat like a desperate plea to escape.
"But... I don’t understand. Why are you telling me this? Why are you helping me?"
He stares at her, his expression unreadable, though something flickers in his eyes—a shadow of emotion too fleeting to name.
"We’re not close enough yet to share our secrets," he says, his smile sharp but empty, like a blade with no warmth behind it. "Now go, before I regret it and hand you over to him."
Her mind spins, a storm of unanswered questions she can’t bring herself to voice. Her tongue feels heavy, her thoughts muddled.
But one thing is unmistakable: he’s helping her. For reasons she can’t fathom, this Fae is offering her a chance. A lifeline. And he hasn’t demanded anything in return.
Before she can say another word, he moves to push the wall closed.
"Pity. I didn't got your name in the end," he says, letting out a dramatic sigh. "Maybe next time."
It's so absurd she feels the urge to chuckle. For the first time since she was kidnapped. It's a miracle. Or a sign of insanity.
"Nesta."
"What?"
She locks eyes with him, her gaze unwavering as she stares into those amber depths, like molten fire swirling. Her own reflection in those fiery orbs.
"My name is Nesta."
He blinks.
"Nesta." He repeats, savouring the syllabes in a soft, low tone. "Be careful, Nesta. Everything can be trap here."
She grips the knife.
"Trust me, I know now" she replies. "Thank you. For doing this."
He chuckles.
"Don't thank me yet, birdie. After all, I'm sure we'll meet again."
The wall closes in her face before she can ask, leaving her alone in the darkness once more.
She battles with herself to get moving, her mind still reeling from everything that just transpired. Pressing her right hand firmly against the wall beside her, she begins to walk back on her steps.
Every step is deliberate, her movements slow and calculated, as she struggles to keep silent. Her breathing is shallow, her chest tight with the effort of not making a sound.
If that bastard truly is here, then there’s a chance—pretty big one—that she'll pass by him through this hidden passage, near the damn rooms.
The weight of the knife in her hand is both a comfort and a reminder of the dangers that lie ahead. Nesta moves cautiously, every small sound amplified in the thick silence surrounding her. Her heart hammers in her chest, a constant warning of how close she is to being discovered. The passage feels tighter now, the stone walls pressing in as if the space itself is conspiring to trap her.
As she walks, her mind races. Who was that fae, Eris? Why had he helped her? And why, despite the sharpness in his eyes and the veiled threat in his words, had he let her go instead of handing her over to the other? Surely it would've been easier for him, and spared him any trouble.
Her breath catches in her throat as a thought hits her like a cold wave—was he playing her all along? Or was there something more to his intentions?
The wall beneath her fingers feels cold, unyielding, as if daring her to falter. She forces herself to ignore the creeping dread, pressing onward, trusting in the directions Eris had given her. The passage twists and turns, its walls narrowing at times, forcing her to squeeze through with minimal room to spare. She forces her thoughts back to the present. 'Focus. Get out of here. Find Feyre.'
The low murmur of voices reaches her ears just as she rounds a corner. Her stomach tightens. They’re close—too close for her liking. She slows her pace, flattening herself against the wall as much as she can, holding her breath. Her eyes scan the shadows, looking for any sign of movement.
The voices grow louder, unmistakable now. It’s him. The one she’s been running from.
"Sorry, but I don't have the slighest idea what you're talking about," That's Eris. She recognizes that suave, arrogant tone. "Are you sure you're not just tired? I know she's been keeping you busy lately..."
"Spare me your bullshit, Vanserra," her tormentor growls, and Nesta's heart stops at how close he sounds. "I can smell her here. Where.Is.She?"
Hold on. Vanserra? Did he just call Eris 'Vanserra'?
'Vanserra...most dangerous.'
'...prick. Almost worse...other.'
'Waiting...company.'
¿What was it he said when he saw her?
'I assume you're not the female I was expecting tonight'
Her knees threaten to give out, her breath growing heavy and clawing at her chest. In her desesperation to escape from a monster, she jumped into another one. And made him bleed.
She truly, definitely, has the worst luck in this godsforsaken world.
But he also let her leave. Even gave her a weapon to defend herself against his kind, or so he claimed. So what's the truth here? Why are these creatures so dreadfully confusing?
"Who exactly is 'her'? I don't understand...Oh!" He chuckles mockingly, in that taunting way of this. "Are you hiding something from us, Rhys? It must be pretty important if our queen doesn't know yet."
"I'm warning you, Eris, I'm losing my patience here. Tell me where the fuck she is now, or you can say goodbye to you and your miserable family before tomorrow."
Her pulse quickens again. It’s really him—her captor, the shadowed fae who had claimed her as his. His voice is unmistakable, even though he’s out of sight. Nesta’s stomach lurches with the realization that she’s within inches of him, and the thought of what he might do if he catches her sends a shiver down her spine.
Keep moving, she tells herself. Don’t stop. Ignore them.
But it's hard to do so when they're so close to her, specially the moment Eris replies.
"Keep my family out of our filthy mouth." It shocks her how deadly serious he sounds. How threatening. "They have nothing to do with your personal messes. If I were you, I'll be more worried about Amarantha finding out. I wonder what she'll think of her whore keeping an human pet under her nose, without her permission?
Whore? Amarantha?
Suddenly, there's a loud bang and she has to bite her lip to not scream.
Someone punched a wall, cracked a hole in it probably. She can hear some heavy breathing, but can't tell whose.
"I'm sick of your games, Vanserra." It's him. "I don't like when people tamper with my things. Tell me where you hid her, or I'll fucking slit your throat right here. How would your mother fare mourning another son?"
Nesta takes another step, but her foot catches on something—a loose stone, a crack in the floor. The faint sound is enough to make her freeze, her breath caught in her throat. The voices stop. The air becomes thick with tension, and the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. She closes her eyes, praying she hasn’t been heard.
Seconds stretch into eternity.
Then, a faint shuffle of feet.
She presses herself further against the stone, her heart racing, praying to whatever gods might listen that she’s not discovered. She waits, breath held, her fingers tightening around the golden knife. The faintest tremor runs through her as she imagines what would happen if the shadows, that dark fae that had haunted her every step, found her now.
Her breath escapes in a silent rush, and she forces herself to keep going, her movements fluid but swift. Just a little further. Just a little further. She has move away from them. Far enough to give her some advantage by the time he comes out to get her. Whatever farse Eris had been spouting to distract him is over with her mistake.
Her mind is racing as the path stretches ahead of her—there’s no going back now. She’s committed herself to whatever happens next. The knife feels cold in her hand, despite having been there for quite a while now.
The voices resume, softer now, but she can no longer understand them. She takes it as a good sign.
The passage winds on, the flickering lights from the cracks that guided her earlier growing faint and distant. Nesta’s pulse thunders in her ears as she moves, every nerve in her body attuned to the faintest shift in sound or shadow. She keeps her right hand on the wall, gripping the knife in her left. Eris’s instructions echo in her mind: Follow the wall. Don’t run. Don’t make a sound. Avoid the shadows.
She tries not to think about how close she came to being caught—or how the bastard would’ve reacted if he’d seen her. His threats, his fury—it all feels like a dark storm closing in, and she’s only barely staying ahead of it.
The air grows colder as she moves deeper into the passage, and she shivers despite herself. Her dress feels flimsy and useless against the chill. The fabric whispers against her legs as she walks, the only sound she allows herself to make.
She misses the fire and the wood from Eris' bedroom. She's going insane, no doubt, missing to be in a Fae's presence.
Nesta rounds another corner, her steps faltering as the walls widen slightly. The space feels different here—emptier, less confining. She presses her hand more firmly against the stone, willing herself to keep going. She doesn’t know where this path leads, but it’s better than staying where she was.
A faint, eerie hum creeps into her awareness. It’s distant, almost like a melody carried on the wind, and she freezes. Her breathing stills as she listens, trying to pinpoint the sound. It doesn’t seem like voices, nor does it belong to any creature she can identify. It's almost hypnotic...except she doesn't feel particularly drawn to it. More like weirded out, scared even. It wants to pull her attention, she knows, and she feels how it flies past her body. Her eyes squint around her, trying to see something.
Avoid the shadows, he said.
How is she supposed to avoid them if she's surrounded by them?
Nesta steps back instinctively, her grip tightening on the knife. She scans the dim passage, her eyes straining to see through the gloom. The hum grows louder, closer, and she realizes it’s not coming from one direction but all around her, as if the passage itself is alive and aware.
Her breath catches as a flicker of movement darts just beyond her vision—a shadow, but not her own. Her blood runs cold, and she takes another step back, pressing herself against the wall.
"Not safe," she whispers to herself, repeating his warning like a mantra. "Not safe. Not safe."
The hum crescendos, a low, thrumming sound that resonates in her chest, and the shadows seem to swell, stretching toward her. Panic claws at her throat, but Nesta forces herself to move, keeping her steps deliberate and quiet. She doesn’t dare look back, doesn’t dare think about what might be lurking just out of sight.
The wall beneath her hand feels warmer now, as though guiding her toward something—away from the terrifying darkness. She follows it blindly, her focus narrowing to the rough texture beneath her fingertips and the steady rhythm of her steps.
Finally, she sees it: a faint glimmer of light ahead, spilling through the cracks of what looks like another possible exit. Relief floods her, but she doesn’t let herself rush. Instead, she inches closer, every muscle coiled and ready to act if something—or someone—appears.
When she reaches the door, she feels along its edges, noticing a soft breeze coming from the other side. Her fingers brush against a hidden latch, and she hesitates, glancing back over her shoulder. She can see the shadows writhe in the distance, alive and hungry, and she knows she has no choice.
Nesta pushes the latch, and the wall swings open, revealing a room bathed in warm light. She steps through, the wall closing shut behind her with a quiet click. The hum vanishes abruptly, leaving an oppressive silence in its wake.
It’s a small, empty space, furnished only with a worn-out desk and an old chair, a few cushions tossed carelessly on the ground, and a dusty bookshelf leaning against the wall. The thick layer of dust suggests it hasn’t been used in quite some time—or that no one cares enough to clean it.
She hears nothing but her own breathing. No footsteps, no voices, no hums. The room feels abandoned.
For now, she’s safe.
As if on cue, her knees give out, and she collapses to the ground. The knife slips from her grasp, clattering loudly against the floor beside her open hand. Her shoulders tremble as her vision blurs with unshed tears. The adrenaline that had kept her upright is gone, leaving her raw and vulnerable. Everything—the danger, the fear, the weight of survival—crashes over her all at once.
Nesta hugs herself tightly, pulling her legs to her chest and burying her face in her knees. For a moment, she lets herself break.
Now it's not the time, a voice eerily similar to her Mother's echoe in her head. Focus. Get out of here. Find Feyre.
Nesta takes a long, deep breath, looking up again. She casts a glance to the knife besides her and grabs it. She scans her surroundings again, making sure she didn't miss anything. The knife somehow comforts her, her heart going back to its normal rhythm as her finger traces the ashwood part.
She doesn’t know what more dangers she'll have to face, but she’ll find a way out of this nightmare—back to her sister—or die trying.
She's Nesta Archeron. And she won't break.
#acosab#acotar#acotar au#a court of shadows and blood#i had a struggle deciding where to end this chapter#but i think this is perfect for the next part#i had some doubts in this one but i think it turned out better than i expected#which it isn't much lmao#hope you all like it#still deciding if next chapter should be from rhysand's pov or nesta's#also notice how he haven't yet heard rhysand's name as such by any character? there's a reason for that that i have in mind#it's a struggle to not have anyone call him rhysand or rhys when talking to him#but trust me there's a specific reason for it#plot related#nesta is not a warrior like feyre so i try to show how differently she acts upon these situations#i don't know if i'm doing it right#anyway here goes nothing#rhysand#nesta archeron#pro nesta archeron#everything i write is pro nesta#rhysta#we need more of these two and i'm sick of waiting so i'm doing it myself#eris vanserra#surprise surprise#if you follow me you know i love this man too much#ofc he had to appear sooner or later#enjoy!!
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If you cant imagine anyone in your life looking at you like this then your God has failed you
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#tbhk#tbhk ch112#tbhk chapter 112#OH GOD IVE REREAD THE CHAPTER SEVERAL TIMES ALREADY I CANT GET OVER IT#please......#doomed narrative go away.....no....#OH THE MISERY#this chapter has me in shambles because#YAYYYY MITSUKOU!!!!!#but at the same time#NOOOOO HANANENE#aidairo please tell me you have a happy ending for everyone#ive been following this manga for 5 years i think my depressive tendencies are justified#how are a bunch of 14 year olds making me this invested and emotional#oh god please be happy#TBHK CHAPTER 113 YOU HAVE TO SAVE ME
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thingies
#witch hat tag#orufrey#nother small post (it's not small..) meek post. mild post#sensei QRTed the last one with a sweet message and made my week <3#drawn bc she randomly announced that originally qif & eas were going to be more openly hostile with each other#but she decided after feedback that qifrey would. Restrain himself now he has children in his life.#like pikachu with togepi in pikachu's vacation. She didn't say that part#just love that since i always say i see them as having this kind of autistic warfare expressed in ways other than actual fighting#since their youths. but i guess we don't know how much they had to interact as kids#i just know they're both opposite ends of Autistic Kids: one do-gooder kid who gets REALLY irked when others dont follow The Rules#and the non-verbal autistic kid who IS one push away from actually biting people#Sometimes autistic people shouldnt be friends.#anyway why did she randomly state this now of all times. Are they interacting in the next chapter. But why.#the next chapter scares me. a teaser piece of art she posted is like.....What is actually going to happen here.#What is going to happen .#anyway hope all fans of my silly drawings are doing well out there
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rereading random bits of descendants of olympus (as one does) and. vera <3 still soooo obsessed with how she takes lupa's divinity. like MAN.......there is something to how shes had to scrape and claw her way into every single good thing shes ever had. that she's never just been able to KEEP these things, that she is always always always fighting for them. and so of course she takes divinity. she wants to LIVE. and in this world where the fates themselves are trying to control her, its like--yeah. maybe you do need a gods power to finally get like, at least a year of the life you want. the life you werent supposed to have. forever thinking about vera's one line in her chapter thats like 'of course the fates are losing power. because they'd never let someone like leo into my life.' YELLS. FOREVER.
also have we talked enough about minnie I THINK WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT MINNIE--
#chatter#son of sea foam#sosf#yeah fuck it im not scared veraposting in the main tags#unrelated to verapost but also i reread the end of ethans chapters and GOD. GOD.#everything happening to percy here is SO GOOD....like yes at the end of the day im rooting for vera and leo lol but percy....#the way estelle is the only one who can fight for him. the parallels drawn with zeus.#how he doesnt even realize killing lupa will betray jason.#dakota (i think lol) talking w ethan and that whole bit about how like...its the people who are loyal who betray you.#bc percy offers loyalty to so many people but at the end of the day he DOES have a list. and. well. evelyn is pretty high up there#and jason just. isnt.#LITERALLY MAKES ME KDJFGNJDFBGF#god. isnt there a sosf discord what if i was in there veraposting on the daily#tbf i dont usually join discords cause im bad at talking to people if they arent starting it#BUT THERE ARE SOME THINGS I WILL YELL ABOUT FOREVER. NO MATTER WHO WANTS OR DOESNT WANT TO HEAR IT#and vera is one of those things <3#anyways hi everyone who follows me for Anything Else i hope you enjoy the veraposting#you should read son of sea foam it changes you :3#and then send me asks about it :333 (<- joking but. what if)#vera love of my life
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trying to get kiki's characterization right (at the same time as navigating a falin who's gotten into a tense situation with people she doesn't know very well AND without the assistance of laios or marcille) is highkey kicking my ass ngl
#a little creature#i did just settle on a comedic icebreaker end to the conversation instead of going the full blown drama route bc i got tired#but now im wondering if that's a copout#like wouldn't falin react more strongly to this considering how i built it up???#but it's been like two months and im at 8-9k and im TIRED i want this chapter to be done#i can't think about it anymore. im settling on quirky joke and feelgood moment followed by quieter conversation later on#and if it seems like falin has a crush on kiki because of the way im describing her. so be it. i can't be bothered trying to control that#we're all gay here you know what you were signing up for.#also sorry i'll get around to answering asks and messages in a bit i just legit.#didn't realize how many days were passing. insomnia + time blindness hardcore got me these past few weeks
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Anyone else feel like Kaito is almost becoming a secondary character in his own manga due to the heists slowly becoming DC clones of figuring out the tricks going on instead of just letting the heist happen and staying within Kaito's perspective.
#Like. I do wonder how much better things would have been if all we got#Was Aoko talking about her mom. And then Kaito wondering what will happen#Him picking up on the clues /he/ needs to deal with her and Naka#And us not knowing exactly what he's planning nor seeing Midoriko until the heist#I don't mind the other characters being there but. I don't need to follow the detective pov in my thief story#The DC-ified heists I do think could be fixed by just. Keeping the focus where its supposed to be; for the most part#Back when Sun Halo came out I even said it would have flowed better if we purely focused on Kaito and Aoko#And then when Hakuba shows up at the end; do a flashback to show how he got there#It doesnt fix everything; but itd make the chapters a whole lot more palatable#(But I'm sure that'd mess up Gosho's chapter by chapter structure somehow idk)#I miss old Mk's stories where anything could happen but you're always meant to support Kaito
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are you just never going to answer gg asks again or what
I mean, you're assuming I get all that many asks about GG these days. The show ended three years ago, and while it's still one that I love very dearly, I don't know if I have all that much left to say about it - I answered a lot of asks while the show was airing and in the year after it, and I wrote a lot of fic for it. While there are still some wips I'd like to finish one day (and it's those that I still sometimes get asks about), the truth is I haven't worked on them in a minute and don't know when inspiration will strike again (because inspiration does still sometimes strike - I even posted a new fic back in January).
I don't know. I'm allowed to be excited about other things, and sending an ask like this doesn't exactly make me want to run back to what's left of the fandom.
#i'm always going to be grateful for the gg fandom experience because i do think it helped me through a chapter in my life#both with moving interstate and re-establishing my life and of course with the covid lockdowns#and i am still very good friends with some people in the fandom but we mostly talk off tumblr these days#actually i'm going to the states and meeting megan in person in a few weeks which is crazy and exciting#but i'd be lying if i said that the experience was all roses and it's definitely shaped how i've engaged with fandoms since#anyway i do still follow what jenna and the cast are doing too#and i'll be watching grosse pointe garden society when it airs in particular#am very excited for melissa fumero and aja naomi king to be in jenna's new show!#trying to end on a positive as usual haha#gg asks#welcome to my ama
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