#flashback mention
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trauma culture is your parents using the fact that you have a poor memory to deny that they used to treat you like shit when you were a kid (both in a physical and emotional way) so now when you get flashbacks from your childhood youre not sure if these things really did happen or if it was just a weird fever dream, like it all seems so real and looking back at it makes me uncomfortable but if they keep saying 'oh we would never do that to you youre just making that up to make us look bad!!!!' then did it REALLY happen......?
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#actually traumatized#trauma culture#trauma#abuse trauma culture#childhood trauma culture#emotional abuse mention#abuse mention#trauma response mention#flashback mention#gaslighting cw#mod puns
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Bello Licentiae Chapter 21: Dance Revolution
Summary:
tw: flashback mention, gang activity, police, missing person Tis the spoopy season :) 'text' JSL Text thoughts
"Hey Mori," Jiro started, twirling an ear jack as she crossed the common area. "I saw you put dancing and keys. Momo has us covered for keys since she's classically trained, but I was wondering how you dancing would work."
Akira made the last couple strokes copying over History notes before looking up. ' I also received classical training, but she probably got more. I would most likely be using my crutches, and I've gotten pretty comfortable with combat footwork in those. ' They pulled up one of the videos they'd found on the train rides to and from Hosu where a choreographer was demonstrating how to adapt popular moves for use with forearm crutches.
"That should work," Jiro watched curiously. "Can you forward that to Mina? She'll be doing the choreography."
' Of course, I've got a playlist I can send her. Have we picked a song yet? ' Akira asked before sending the link. ' If no one from our class is interpreting, Anii should be able to do it. She'll just need to meet with us a couple times beforehand to rehearse. '
"'Hero Too' by Yuki Hayashi and Ayapeta," Jiro paused her earjack twirling for a moment in thought. "Do you think we need an interpreter? Koda suggested it, but I don't remember seeing one at a concert before."
' From what I saw on HeroTube, deaf or hard of hearing people can request interpreters, and the interpretations are more about capturing the spirit and beats of the song instead of direct translation, ' Akira clarified.
"I think this is the longest and most civil conversation we've had," Jiro huffed as she took a chair across from them and started pulling out her own notes.
Akira raised an eyebrow and shrugged. ' Yeah, cause you were acting like a jerk for most of the first term. I'm glad you worked whatever that was out. '
Jiro stiffened but huffed an agreement before settling into her work. They studied together for a couple hours before Akira moved to their room for privacy. It still felt weird being alone with someone they weren't close to, and Jiro's periodic humming clashed with the music in their head.
That weekend, Akira stayed in the dorms for dance practice with Mina and the dance crew. Midoriya and Ida especially struggled at first to get the hang of rhythm, but they gradually eased into it. Akira also did a couple sessions with just Mina to make sure they could have a clone do the routine if they were wheelchair-bound that day.
"We could have a separate routine for if you need your wheelchair," Mina offered while they took a water break.
Akira shook their head, ' If we had more time, that would be great, but with midterms coming up, I don't think it's going to be practical. '
"So, your roommate..." Mina prodded with a glint in her eye. "What's his deal?"
Akira rolled their eyes and pushed off the wall. ' How so? '
"You've been sitting on the biggest gossip this whole time!" Mina pouted, drawing a chuckle out of them. "What's he like? Why do they keep attacking us? Did he join willingly? Is he single?"
Akira grew more exasperated with each question until they just gave her a flat look. ' He's gay. He's... kind of like a German Shepherd? Protective and mean to strangers but soft in his own way with people he knows. And it's complicated. Can we get back to practicing? '
"Oh! Like an older brother."
Mina started back into the routine, leaving Akira a little stunned. Oh .
The next week flew by between festival preparations, a new wave of self-destructing weapons popping up on the black market, and midterm prep. Exams were still a few weeks away, but this time Akira organized the same study group to help make sure they were ready. When Saturday rolled around, Aizawa brought Eri to school so she could see more of the campus when there were fewer people to overwhelm her.
Akira, Togata, and Midoriya eagerly led her about, showing her the rest of the main building while Akira kept an eye out for any signs of discomfort in the little girl. A few of the business courses handed out fliers for seminars and joint presentations with support course students, although Akira frowned slightly at Mei not being on any of them.
' Have you spoken with Hatsume? She's planning on going independent last I heard, ' Akira asked a student from 1-E.
He blanched, "Oh no one messes with her! She's got all these half-formed ideas that explode all the time. It's a good thing she was already planning on starting her own company. No one wants to be dragged down with her."
"I-I'm sure she-" Midoriya stuttered, smile falling as he hesitantly looked to Akira and Togata.
' Oh hell no, ' Akira glared at him while Togata interpreted. ' I have personally worked with Bubblegum on multiple occasions, and I'm telling you now she will make it big one day. Those half-formed ideas are the start of some of her best items, and they explode so often because they're innovative! ' They drew themself up to their full 140 cm and stalked closer to the agape student as he backed up. ' If I ever hear you or anyone else for that matter disparage her, I will personally make sure you never hear the end of it. Do I make myself clear? '
"Crystal," he gulped and sprinted away.
Akira took a calming breath and reset their posture before turning and checking on Eri. Her eyes were wide with curiosity and a little bit of fear, so Akira crouched despite their protesting knees. ' Hey Eri, how are you feeling? '
Eri scrunched her brow for a moment before signing, ' Good. ' At Akira's smile, she continued. "You're not usually mad."
Understanding flitted across Midoriya's face, and Akira nodded. ' I don't like when people say mean things about people I care about. That includes you, ' they slowly reached out to give her a head pat, which she leaned into. Akira stood up, knees popping and crackling in protest as they continued on.
At the festival grounds, Monoma and Tetsutetsu popped up with a silver dragon head. Akira bit back a smile at the reminder of Hitoshi and asked, ' What is 1-B doing for the festival? That looks neat. '
Monoma launched into an albeit boastful explanation of the ambitious play they were putting on as Awase approached, keeping an eye on him. Akira leaned towards Eri conspiratorially and signed with Togata quietly interpreting, ' Copycat gets really competitive with our class. It sounds like they're taking inspiration from some pre-quirk movies, which'll be interesting. '
Eri giggled, and Midoriya asked, "Where's Kendo? Isn't she usually with you, Monoma?"
Awase shrugged apologetically, "She got entered into the beauty pageant by Reiko, so they're figuring that out."
"Nejire's also entering that, shall we see what they're up to?" Togata asked with a twinkle in his eye. "I bet her costume is going to be really pretty this year."
As they slipped into one of the equipment room, Akira cocked their head at the odd pose Hado took in the air supported by one of her waves. "Hey, why is Eri here? How fun!" she asked cheerfully when she noticed the group.
As the others talked about the contestants and last year's champion, Akira wandered over to the clothing racks. They were filled with a variety of gowns and shorter pieces of a pretty wide variety of themes and sizes. Noticing the lack of masculine options, they turned to Amajiki, ' Is this a fem-presenting only event? '
"Eh, I guess we haven't had anyone want to participate who wasn't?" Yuyu responded when Amajiki looked lost. "Beauty pageants are more of a traditionally girl thing to do."
Akira shrugged, signing a loose ' thanks ' as they made their way back to the group. They noticed with some amusement that Eri seemed enraptured by Nejire and the assortment of pretty items. With a smile, Akira snapped a picture and sent it to Yamada, including a few of the details she seemed most taken with. In moments, they got a chaotic string of emojis to decode later as they headed to the last group, the support course showcase. ' This is where Bubblegum studies, ' Akira explained to Eri on the way.
"This is something that makes a splash every year!" Midoriya said excitedly as Togata covered his ears against the grinding and general workshop noises. Akira offered a pair of earplugs to Eri, but she was similarly taken with the busy room.
Akira grinned and gently maneuvered Eri to the side as Hatsume rounded Midoriya from behind. "That's right! The school festival is the support course's time to shine!"
Akira marveled at the much-improved robotic suit Hatsume had been working on as she continued. "This time, we've been given the spotlight! It's so I can get even bigger companies to look at my babies even more carefully!"
' Did you fix the... ' Akira paused as the suit started smoking. They winced and guided Eri back a bit, snapping their capture scarf out to grab the dome that shot off the top. Akira let the momentum carry for a moment before guiding it back to the floor a safe distance away. ' Good luck, Bubblegum! '
While grabbing a late lunch, Togata asked how Eri was feeling. She seemed thoughtful for a moment before signing ' happy ' and adding, "There are a lot of different people working hard, so I wonder how it'll turn out..."
"That's what people call 'getting excited,'" Nezu clarified from a few chairs over with Kayama. "I'm also excited about the school festival!"
Kayama added as they got up that if the alarm sounds, even a false alarm, they would have to cancel and evacuate. There would be significant extra security, especially in the wooded area around campus, to avoid that at least. Akira slid a look at Midoriya, knowing his tendencies, but everything was set up to be quiet for the time being.
On Monday, Akira was waiting for Mad Banquet outside the cafeteria when they saw a call from Haru. They quickly shot off a text as they answered saying they had to take a call. ' Is everything alright? '
"I'm sorry to do this, but have you seen or heard from Giran lately?" he asked, worry creasing his brow.
Akira shook their head as they thought back. ' No, and the League wouldn't have either. They're off-grid for the time being. '
"Shit." Haru called out their response to whoever else was in the room.
Anxiety spiking, Akira asked, ' What's going on? '
"He's been dark for over a week," Haru explained. "It was a week on Friday, but we didn't want to worry you if someone else had heard from him. We've already checked with his underlings. I know you can't do much from there, but..."
' I can always try ,' Akira replied, cycling through options. ' Probably best not to involve Eraser, right? '
Haru hesitated, glancing to the side before nodding. "Giran's a big step up from what he currently knows of your involvement in the underworld. Keep it in-house if you can, but don't actively hide it."
With a sharp nod, Akira hung up and headed back to the classroom to meet with their group since the weather was turning colder. They started searching for what they could on the internet, but there wasn't much to go off of yet. Akira waved off the others' concern when they stiffly walked in, not bothering with an excuse since Fumikage looked ready to call them out as it was.
For the next week, Akira stayed up most of the night, only getting two hours of sleep or three if they passed out while searching. Intelligence networks were shifting, and the media started to catch on that a major change happened in the underworld. No one had connected the dots yet, and Akira tried and failed daily to get in touch with Dabi.
"Is something going on?" Taishiro asked after quietly taking Akira aside on Tuesday before their shift. "You were off yesterday and look even worse today."
' I'm fine, just dealing with internal issues right now, ' Akira responded, plastering a small fake smile on their face. ' It might be nothing. '
Taishiro grew even more worried but nodded, "I'll hold you to it, kiddo. Just come to me when you're ready, okay?"
By Thursday, Akira was starting to fall asleep in class, only Dark Shadow keeping them from nodding off while their focus kept splitting between the lectures and Giran. Did the Wrens finally get a hold of him? They could be torturing him because of me . What if they out Dabi? Everything could ...
"Akira!"
Akira jerked back into focus as they saw an empty classroom aside from them and Aizawa. "You're benched for Heroics today," he frowned as they struggled to focus on him. "I don't know what's going on, but Shiro confirmed something was off on Tuesday, and you've only been getting worse."
' But- ' Akira protested, swaying slightly as they stood. Aizawa gently steadied them by their arm, drawing a sharp flinch and fresh wave of guilt. He patiently watched with now open concern. Taking stock of their state, Akira huffed and pressed their mouth into a thin line. ' Fine. ' They looked pointedly at their arm, and Aizawa let go after a moment.
"Can you tell me what's going on?" he eventually asked.
Akira sighed in exasperation, running a hand over their face. ' Someone very important to my group is missing. He's been dark for too long, and no one's been able to reach him. '
Aizawa's eyebrows crinkled as he surveyed them. "Why didn't you say something earlier? I can look at arrest records, at least rule that out."
' We already have, ' Akira waved him off. ' Giran would be too big a catch to keep quiet. '
Aizawa sucked in a breath. He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Okay, that answers the why. Undergrounds have noticed his absence, but we thought he was in a different area and his underlings got complacent. If he's missing , we can start looking elsewhere and help ease the fallout.
"In the meantime," he gave them a pointed look, "go back to your dorm and get some rest. Don't keep looking right now." Aizawa's gaze softened as Akira leaned against the desk, head swimming as they sipped on a jelly pouch. "Let me take the next steps, and I'll let you know what we find."
Akira reluctantly limped back to the dorms, barely remembering to let Haru know Aizawa and the undergrounds were now involved before crashing.
Around three, Akira jolted awake and groaned, waiting for the pain from the nightmare to abate. As the agonizing seconds passed, they realized it wasn't just from the nightmare. Pushing through the pain, they grabbed the pill bottle and shook out a couple to take with a jelly pouch. Hopefully that'll take some of the edge off . Akira grimaced at the burning the pills caused in their stomach, but at least sometimes they helped. They tried to go back to sleep after that, but the pain kept them awake. After a while, they turned on their chronic flare HeroTube playlist, a mix of podcasts and music they could zone in and out of without missing much.
Some hours later, Hitoshi checked in on them and mentioned he'd tell Aizawa they couldn't come to class. Dark Shadow burst in not long after with a heating pad, more blankets, and chocolate. Akira thanked them, although they weren't sure they could stomach anything that rich for a bit. Around noon, they dragged themself onto their wheelchair with a blanket and made their way downstairs using the touchpad instead of wheels to turn.
After putting the ingredients in the blender, Akira pulled the blanket a little tighter and started grounding themself as they turned the blender on. They quickly backed up their wheelchair, but their vision grew staticky as the noise blended with Sonic's pulsing, grating quirk. In two three four , Akira tried to focus, barely registering the difference in material of the wheelchair and soft blanket and the metal resonance chamber Sonic used.
By the time they were fully back in the present, the blender was long finished. Akira tiredly transferred the mix to their oversized tumbler and trudged back to their room, very much ready for the day to be over.
"Are you okay, Reaper?"
Akira smiled tiredly over to Eri where she had stopped coloring. They bookmarked the open investigations report and closed their laptop to turn to her. ' Just worried about someone I know. It's not someone you know, so please don't worry about it. '
Eri scrunched up her brow at that, "But I'm worried about you?"
Akira winced, knowing their eyebags were still pretty prominent. ' Leave the worrying to people older than you, okay? Kids shouldn't have to be worried about this stuff. ' After a moment, they added, ' I'm sorry I placed some of that emotional burden on you. '
After they explained a couple words, Eri lit up and slid off her chair. She ran down the hallway towards Aizawa and Yamada's bedroom as Akira watched in confusion. Did I say something wrong? Akira couldn't hear any crying, but then again, Eri would have learned to cry silently. They started to get up only to hear the soft patter of footsteps next to Yamada's longer strides.
"Sweetie, are you sure you want me? They usually prefer Shou for-"
"No!" Eri stomped her foot to Akira's amusement. "Daddy says you're oldest, so he would just go to you. Is anyone older than you?"
Akira stifled a snort as an affronted Yamada rounded the corner with Eri in tow. A blush spread across their cheeks as they realized why Eri had grabbed him, and they awkwardly waved. ' Sorry, I didn't realize she was going to get you. '
"You said kids shouldn't worry about this. Daddy says you're a kid. So logically, you need the oldest person!" Eri looked proud of herself, one small hand fisted on her hip.
' Ah, logic, my only weakness, ' Akira dramatically melted onto the table, leaving their head up just enough to make out color blobs. As the purple blob moved around the table into their periphery, Akira shifted to look at Yamada crouched a comfortable distance away.
"Hey, Shou told me a little of what's going on. You wanna talk about it, little listener?" he gently asked.
' Not much to talk about, ' Akira sat up enough to sign after they made sure Eri wasn't in line of sight. ' There's nothing. '
Yamada hummed, quirk activating slightly as the pitch dropped into what felt like a cat purr. Akira tensed but slowly relaxed as they watched the hero sit next to them. "Shou's really good at finding people, you know. Nezu, too."
Akira thinned their mouth and looked away briefly. ' This is different. If a rival did manage to rise up, they would've been disposed of by now. No one who's been in the underworld for any period of time would touch him. None of this makes sense! '
"Hey, you've got a lot going on," Yamada interrupted their thoughts as their head snapped up to briefly meet his gaze. They quickly looked away but not before seeing the open concern. "Shou and I are here for you if you want to vent or need some space, okay? If there's anything we can do from helping look to bouncing around ideas to making food, just let us know."
Akira hesitated, the request seeming silly in the moment. At his encouraging smile, they asked, ' Can we have yaki-udon tonight? ' Akira asked after a moment. Yamada brightened and started checking for ingredients, soon sending Aizawa out with a list. Eri even roped Akira into helping with the preparation. As guilty as they felt for not spending the time looking for Giran, Akira felt a little less wrung out when they started the search again after dinner.
On Monday, Taishiro confined them to desk duty, which they spent continuing the search when not putting calls through and exploring the system. A new set of fingerprints did show up in a country-wide search for the owner of a severed finger, so Akira sent that off to forensics. A few minutes later, they clicked back to the request and double-checked the found location. Maybe some kind of yakuza statement? They mused and put a note in the file to cross-check the prints with their own database if the police didn't turn up anything.
Notes:
"Hero too" was composed by Yuki Hayashi, Ayapeta wrote the lyrics, and Chrissy Costanza performed the song. Jiro mellows out in her treatment of other students in the anime at least, so figured Akira would give her another chance. Haru: don't actively hide it but y'know play it close to your chest Akira: got it, stay up all hours to find him and don't tell anyone Haru: ... Aizawa and Taishiro: wtf is going on
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#flashback mention#gang activity#police#missing person#lgbtqia#aro ace#agender#nonbinary#mha#bnha#fanfic#dadzawa#when good people go to war#bello licentiae#totally not me forgetting they're literally involved with afo when I wrote this lol#jirou kyouka#adaptive dance#jiro got remarkably better in second term#mina#mina is a gossip /affectionate#older brother dabi#hatsume mei#mei is a treasure#class 1-b#class rivalry#ua big three#midoriya izuku#blue fang#haru#totally didn't name him that from the abridged whatever it is
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queen of diamonds, upright + reversed 💎
I've redone this like eighty times, I have to just be done with it now and stop staring at all my mistakes oh no 🫠
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 8 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 8 spoilers#coming in well after the fact but that's what happens when the art doesn't cooperate#and i just HAD to draw something for vil's ob (re-ob?) because i loved it so much#legit put my hand over my mouth and went “oh!” when i realized what was happening#i thought it was just going to be an idia thing because. y'know. closing out his character arc from episode 6 and all#so this was like. oh! oh we're going to get ALL the inky boys!!!!!#i wonder if this is why we got a malleus flashback so early...#not to mention everyone's dreams?!#i am braced for 90% of the dreams to be kind of jokey/inconsequential because we have SO many characters to get through#and most of the time will probably be spent on our lads (literally) dropkicking their emotional problems#but i am excited to see everyone regardless!#and also kind of terrified! what on EARTH will floyd be dreaming about. do i want to know.#i do but do i want to.#man. they're probably not going to get back to it but i do wonder what silver's dream was#what was he doing when he was like 'wait a minute' and noped right out of there#lilia: here silver i made dinner :)#silver: oh boy this looks great! ...YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD#ouuuagh i'm still deep in the blotsauce guys and i'm loving it#come make snowangels in the ink with me it's great
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additional thoughts on why they had better stick to sword drills: Liu Qingge would doki-doki himself into a qi deviation and Shen "middle sibling" Qingqiu would immediately ruin his ~aloof immortal~ persona
#svsss#liushen#liu qingge#shen qingqiu#would sqq beat lqg in an actual fight? no.#would sqq succeed in winning exactly once because there's no world in which lqg is prepared for how dirty sqq will fight#once it's a wrestling match and he's having flashbacks to his older siblings trying to pin him and subsequently bluescreens when#sqq fucking licks him in order to get him to let go? yes.#neither of them are going to recover from that. it can never ever EVER be mentioned again for very different reasons#sqq is beyond embarrassed his face is too thin for this#lqg is lying awake at night reliving it#my art
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A Vision
That scene in s9 is probably one of my favorite Jay moments because of how well it shows why Wu chose him and what his role is in the team. Being the out-of-the-box thinker, the dreamer. Especially because of how it sets him apart from the rest, like Zane, Cole or Kai, whose purposes are to protect others while Jay inspires people (s6 and s12)
#ninjago#jay ninjago#ninjago jay#jay walker#ninjago dragons rising#ninjago fanart#ninjago wu#wu ninjago#dad jay au#← it's that scene from chapter 18#the moment when jay had to be on the verge of death to have a vision with wu#also yes this flashback is the one that is repeated the most in the AU#aa drawing young jay makes me sad. he has no idea what awaits him#i don't know if i've mentioned it before but in my hc he's 16 when wu recruits him#so he's the same age as Kaida here bc parallels
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That scene- where Clint makes more trick arrows… 😭 please just imagine for me Tony Stark and Clint Barton, the two insomniacs of the avengers team, huddled in the lab at four in the morning, Tony leaned against Clint, half draped over him, laughing at something he’s said as they both fiddle with tech, cracking jokes and coming up with more and more outlandish trick arrows to create, toasting marshmallows over the small fire they accidentally started and sharing thoughts and space and… just Clint and tony friendship for me please
#clint barton#tony stark#besties#the avengers#give me more casual mentions of their friendship even if they arent there#like i DEVOURED clint using stark tech to make his arrows in hawkeye#have him call up bruce once for some insight#he and thor go drinking and he introduces kate#have a flashback to clint needing his billionaire best friend to pay for something#him and nat#just give me some avengers mention crossovers please#sobbing#avengers#marvel#mcu
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Listen. Listen. In no universe will I pretend that Dream wasn’t in the wrong when he condemned Nada to Hell. That was fucked up.
But bear with me and trust that I know that while we take a step back from that for a second to talk about something else.
Nada saw Dream from afar, fell in love with him, and went on a quest to track him down. Once she finds Some Guy In A Mask (not realizing who he is) she talks about how she loves this mystery man so much. Mask Guy is like “For real?” and she’s like “For real for real!!” Then he takes off his mask and is like “this is amazing I absolutely love you too!!” and Nada is immediately like “oh shit, Dream?? Of the Endless??? Nvm gotta go”
Everything after that is 100% shitty of Dream. Not arguing that. However, treating this as fictional characters in a story….
A woman saw Dream, claimed to love him enough to track him down, and then as soon as she found out who he was she was horrified.
So anyway when I think about Dream not wanting to reveal his identity to Hob that’s what I’m thinking about.
#the sandman#dreamling#sandman meta#I personally like the reading that the Nada story is a metaphor#I can’t remember who said it but someone mentioned that if we’re being literal Nada doesn’t act like someone who was in Hell for 10k years#she acts like a pissed off ex who had a bad breakup#but I digress this post isn’t about that#it’s about Dream having personal experience of someone claiming to love him until they learn his identity#Hob flirting: so who are you? what’s your name? ;)#Dream: *war flashbacks*
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Dakota Fanning & Andrew Scott Answer Rapid-Fire Questions | Off the Cuff | Vogue
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PROMPT
Thinking about Dick in cryo and hypothermia...
What if something went wrong during a Titans mission? Stranded for a bit somewhere cold, rescue took a little while? And Dick ends up going into cryosleep? Talons look pretty dead when in that mode, right?
The rest of the titans freaking out, especially since they still aren't really sure what species or what flavor of meta Nightwing is, and they don't know what to do... (Let them be somewhere where they can't get in touch with the Bats to ask)
All of them convinced Nightwing died, horrified and mourning, and trying to figure out how they will break the news to Batman and Robin...
And halfway through the discussion the 'corpse' just sits up.
Hardcore trauma for sure 😭😭😭😭
Lmao Wally would deadass be cradling Dick’s head so gently and heaving big, gut wrenching sobs and then Dick would just— sit up. Blink.
“Why are you crying so loud?”
And everyone just starts screaming.
(One of the Titans totally tries sneaking Dick’s pulse once they’ve all gone to sleep— just to be sure Dick really is alive and they didn’t dream it— and promptly starts screaming again when there’s none.
Dick is cranky about being woken up. Going to sleep without Jason in the nest is hard enough, did they HAVE to wake him up????
He softens significantly though and explains that, no, he does have a pulse. It’s just really, REALLY slow. And a couple of seconds held to his wrist isn’t gonna do it mate, sorry.)
#poor Wally#poor everyone really#dick is used to it by now#no more hardcore flashbacks when his core temp drops too low#it’s just an inconvenience by now#he should really have mentioned this to the titans#dick accidentally traumatizing his friends since day one#Jason can’t stop laughing when dick tells him the story#jason todd#talon dick grayson#titans#batfamily#dick grayson#owl song
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"you just feel yourself let go."
still thinking about this episode. man. 💪💥
#misfits and magic#misfits and magic 2#mismag 2#mismag#evan kelmp#d20#dimension 20#just like art#im SO behind on mismag but i literally cant believe this happened still#''why did you add the origami cranes to this?'' thank you for asking: i just think theyre neat!#also i know they didnt mention it explictly but i truly believe that evans last moments slipping into the pool and death would be about#if he made a difference. about if the struggles of it all were worth it. about if he was worth it.#especially considering he decided to haunt the closest thing to his friends.#so i think it makes sense that his life flashback would include physical proof of 1) his connection to the world and how he helped to chang#the world especially in the face of adversity#and 2) an item literally MADE for communication and connection to others.#both on a global scale when magic left AND the evolution of the magic that his closest friends and him used.#''but the origami cranes are based on storm petrels? a black bird with a white stripe near the tail? why are the cranes colourful here?''#firstly: youre full of questions today mister.#secondly: i tried to make them black but i really liked being able to differentiate between the cranes using fun colours#also i tried just overlaying a dark colour on top but it still didnt do it for me#but i tried to keep them close to the petrels: i kept the '''''white''''' stripe near the tail! id like some points for that!#excuses aside: i hope youre doing well! thanks for looking and reading!
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YELLOWJACKETS -> aerial shots.
#honorable mention to the laura lee flashback pool scene i love that aerial shot but it was just the complete opposite aesthetic of this set#i screen recorded twice as many scenes as i giffed#yellowjackets#yj#my gifs#yellowjacketsedit#yellowjackets96#yellowjacketscentral#tvedit#filmedit#horroredit#dailyflicks#tusermiles#tusercj#tv series
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Trauma culture is flashbacks interrupting your sleep. I'm so tired
❤
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as much as i LOVE the ending to mob psycho 100 (truly a beautiful way to wrap everything up) the one thing that bothers me most is shou’s character development
I think it’s specifically because of his lack of screen time and ONE trying to keep the manga 100 chapters long but he really shot himself in the foot with that. Mostly everyone was written well but I feel like he ran out of time to write everything he really wanted (remember that off handed remark about an esper awakening from Claws horrifying chambers? never brought up again). I feel like for the most part, every other character has a satisfying ending. It aligns with their goals. Serizawa finally feels like he is contributing good to society. Teru understands he isn’t special but hey, nobody is. Reigen isn’t alone anymore. Ritsu and Mob have come to accept Mob for who he is and have started the process of moving on from their trauma. Shou has… well he beat his father. but that wasn’t really him. That was Mob. He spent his whole life coming up with ways to get Toichiro to see some sense and in the end, it had to be someone else. Not him. Not his son. Do you think he ever moved on from that? Do you think he knows he has to? He can technically live his life “normally” now but can he? We can’t even know how he’s dealing with everything because he doesn’t show up in season three at all until like episode 11 (NOT counting the maid cafe scene although it was undeniably really funny). and the thing he takes away from his experience fighting Mob?
BROTHER THEY MADE A WHOLE SHOW ABOUT WHY YOU SHOULDN’T DO THAT. YOU’RE IN THAT SHOW. It almost feels like he’s going backwards??? Like I understand where he’s coming from, and for my own peace of mind i’ve been trying to think he meant it for like violence. but i cannot stop thinking of a Shou that quit using his powers entirely. i literally stopped typing this post and stared at the ceiling rn because of it. like i’m not crazy right?? i can’t be the only one who feels like something is missing about his character??? that CAN’T be what he walks away with
Also this might be a “and the curtains were blue” moment but i also want to talk about this omake
Yeah sure it’s devastating but then I actually started thinking about it. The title is called “Suzuki Shou 13 Years old.” Which is interesting to me because Shou was 12 almost the whole story. His birthday is in december (RIP). He turned 13 like just a month before the confession arc took place. The only thing i don’t know is if he has this dream before or after. I really hope it’s before because if he had this dream post confession arc then ouch???? ?? because if it’s after then that means he clearly hasn’t moved on from everything?? he’s still being haunted by his origin?? and we’re never gonna see him ever move on?? ONE i’m going to kill you and then kill you again make a shou spin off NEOW
#sorry i’ve been thinking about him a lot#like. way too much#especially about this#on a more light hearted note#as i was making the ID for the omake i realized it kinda implies that#1) shou has been styling his hair like That since he was a child (which is also shown in a flashback)#and 2) he keeps his hair styled like that even when he sleeps. i know that mf’s hair crunchy#also i do understand that ONE makes errors#so thats why i mentioned “the curtains were blue”#cuz he did make inukawa’s birthday a leap year… on a year where there wasn’t a leap year#i just like overthinking hehe (lie)#mob psycho 100#mp100#shou suzuki
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starting off with an amuse-bouche of some of my initial favorite bits! y'all, this update was WILD.
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#we really got it all in this update huh#we got flashbacks! backstory! shocking twists! cgs?!#we got the silver breakdown to end all silver breakdowns#the boy does not emote for 6 episodes straight and now it's POURING out and i am shoving my face directly into it#not to mention my favorite: action scenes represented by intensely wiggling the sprites around#and OF COURSE meleanor my beloved. your highness. ma'am. holy shit.#i guess it's mel instead of mal? hey she can spell her name however she wants#meleanor can do whatever she wants about anything. who is going to stop her.#meleanor: hold on baby. mommy wants to make a point. (yeets malleus' egg across the room into liia's face)#man though i am so afraid that crowley really might turn out to have been revaan this whole time#because this means we live in a world where dire fucking crowley managed to pull BOTH meleanor and lilia and i cannot accept that#briar valley are you okay. is it something in the water.#mrs. zigvolt took all the good taste and left none for anyone else
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(they all say that) it gets better | luke castellan
bleedin' me dry for context (this is that reader's origin story!!)
summary: a look into your unclaimed year.
a/n: does it still count as fluff if you already know it doesn’t end well? idk but i’m having fun writing for this pair so it’s okay. i hope you guys are enjoying reading them!! this ended up becoming a hell of a lot longer than i thought it would be but these kind of one shots are my faves to write lol
title from teenage dream by olivia rodrigo bc apparently guts teenage angst works very well for a demigod who feels like they're worthless and unwanted for a good period of time!! shoutout to the gods
wc: 11.4k JESUS
warning(s): fem!child of demeter reader. typical anger at the gods, but luke is actually pretty sweet! crazy. mostly hurt/comfort, reader is going through it at the beginning (mentions of injuries and almost dying), honestly she's going through it the whole time but luke is very nice to her lol. barely proofread bc proofing 34 pages is a nightmare !!
It was your first day as a demigod and you were already off to a bad start.
You didn’t remember much, obviously. There was a lot of stumbling, barely held up by your satyr as you crossed the border, and then full on collapsing. Somehow you managed to stay conscious all the way to the infirmary, enough to hear shocked murmurs from the people-like blobs around you and terrified, whispered affirmations from your satyr as he ran along with whoever was carrying you.
You didn’t remember much. But you do remember thinking what a shameful existence it would be to die at fourteen.
And now you were sitting in an uncomfortable cot, staring at the wall and counting divots. The first half of your visit was only there in flashes as you drifted in and out of consciousness, but now, unfortunately, you were fully awake. You belatedly wondered how many other kids began their camp life with a stay at the infirmary.
The thought was dashed from your head as you jolted and cried out in sudden pain, and you shot daggers with your glare at the boy next to you.
“Sorry.” The boy fixing you up was about your age, and he almost seemed to glow from within. “You dislocated your shoulder—I was popping it back into place.”
“You could have warned me,” you seethed.
“I did,” he said, and when he placed his hands on your shoulder they actually did glow. “You just weren’t listening.”
“...Sorry,” you said after a moment. “I’m having a rough day.”
He shook his head with a slight smile. “It’s expected.”
“It’ll be okay,” your satyr said, and some of the tension left your shoulders as you looked over at Tate. He’d been by your side for the past two weeks of disasters, and you’d saved each other’s lives more times than you could count. You were just thankful he didn’t have to watch you die. “Jace is one of camp’s best healers. You’re in good hands.”
You nodded, not wanting to cause any more problems, so you bit your lip and bit your tongue and let him heal the rest of your injuries in silence. He was done soon enough, and you could feel both their eyes on you as you rifled through your backpack. Thankfully, Tate brought it in as you were dying. Your own blood stained the nylon.
“How do you feel?” Tate asked anxiously.
“Better,” you said, tearing your eyes away from it as you continued making sure all your belongings were still there. “A lot better. Not like there’s much competition.”
Tate chuckled, and Jace picked up a small bag from the bedside table and handed it to you—it looked like there were little pieces of fudge inside. “Here.”
“What’s this?” you asked as you took it.
“Ambrosia,” he said. “Wait a few hours before you have a piece, and only have a little if you feel a lot of pain. I already gave you nectar while you were out, and the last thing we need is you burning up.”
You looked at Tate with raised eyebrows and he smiled a bit. “Ambrosia and nectar are the food of the gods. It heals demigods in small portions, but take too much and you’ll get a fever. Worst case scenario, you’ll literally burn up from the inside.”
“Oh,” you said, and you stuffed the bag into your pack before zipping it up. “I’ll… I’ll wait.”
“Probably a good idea,” Jace said, and he looked over at your satyr as he stood up. “I’ve gotta get back to my sword-fighting lessons. Can you give her a tour?”
He shook his head. “I have to debrief with Chiron and Mr. D. There were some… rough things on the road.” Tate looked at you. “I’ll be back in thirty minutes— are you sure you’ll be okay?”
“It’s fine,” you said with a smile. “Do your thing. I’ll look around some, then we’ll find each other later.”
Tate nodded thankfully and went through an open door opposite your bed, and Jace gave you a tight smile as he started to put away all the medical supplies he used on you. You sighed, slung your bag over your shoulder, and walked out.
You shut the door behind you and blinked rapidly as you tried to adjust to the sunlight. Then, you heard someone sigh.
“Thank the gods you’re okay.”
You turned to see a boy standing up from the wall. Dark curls hung just above his eyes, a contrast to his tanned skin, slightly red from exertion. He was wearing the same bright orange shirt that your healer was—Camp Halfblood, it said in curved text. He was far too pretty for his own good.
“I’m the one who carried you in,” he said, and you realized you were frowning. “Wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“Oh,” you said. “That’s… that’s nice of you.”
“It’s been a while since we’ve gotten someone new,” he said. “Even longer since they’ve had such a dramatic entrance.”
You shrugged. You didn’t exactly know what to say to this boy. “Sorry.”
He paused for a moment, and then he nodded. “Not one for conversation. That’s fine.”
“I did almost just die,” you said wryly. “I’m fresh out of icebreakers at the moment.”
“Maybe I can help with that.” He held out his hand. “Luke Castellan. Head Counselor of the Hermes cabin, and apparent rescuer of damsels.”
You huffed a laugh as you stared at him. “I’m a damsel?”
“I’d say you were in as much distress as someone could be back there,” he said with a shrug. “I practically saved your life. I think that deserves a handshake.”
The slightest bit of tension dissolved from your shoulders and you shook his hand. His smile grew.
“How are you feeling?” he asked, dropping his hand. “You were pretty rough when I found you.”
“Better,” you said, though you grimaced a bit as you tested your shoulder, and you decided to switch your pack to your other side. “Whoever that guy in the infirmary is, he’s good.”
Luke nodded. “Son of Apollo—they’ve got healing abilities. Very useful when we’re all constantly getting injured.”
Your brows knit together. “So it really is all real.”
“You were nearly dead on our doorstep, and from those claw marks I’m guessing it wasn’t just a bad fall.” Luke offered a wry smile. “I’m sure you’ve known it’s all real for a while.”
“Of course,” you said. “It’s just weird to really know that it’s all real. To see all of you, really. Just knowing I’m not alone.”
He nodded. “That’s the best thing about it, knowing you’re not alone.” He looked around at your surroundings—various campers chatting as they walked with each other (some glancing at you as they went by), distant shouts and cheers, and a perfectly blue sky matching the perfectly blue house you just left.
“I’d say the worst thing about it is feeling like I still have no idea what’s going on,” you said. “Unless the gods exist just to be deadbeats. That’d be disappointing.”
Luke actually laughed at that, his eyes crinkling at the corners, and you found yourself smiling a bit. “I can tell we’re gonna get along.”
Your own smile returned—it was like his joy was infectious. “You think so?”
“I know so,” he nodded. “Just… try not to throw the gods’ names around like that. They don’t like to be talked about unless they’re being revered.”
You huffed. “Sounds like an interesting place.”
“Camp Halfblood,” he provided, and he gestured around you with his hand. “Keeping young heroes safe for over three millennia.”
“What,” you said wryly, “are you their PR guy?”
Luke laughed and shook his head. “It’s something Chiron likes to say.”
“You’re the second person to mention Chiron,” you said. “Who exactly is he?”
“You haven’t gotten a tour yet?”
You gave him a look. “Come on. You carried me in. You think I could have gotten a tour between then and now?”
“Fair,” he admitted, and he tilted his head. “I can give you one, if you’re so inclined.”
“I said I would wait for Tate,” you said. “He’s my satyr— I figure I owe it to him.”
“C’mon,” Luke said. “He’s meeting Chiron and Mr. D—that’ll take long enough on its own, and if we don’t get out of here soon enough, you’re gonna get dragged into a whole other conversation with them. At least this way, you can get a little bit of downtime before all the lore of this place is dropped on you.”
You bit your lip, and then you sighed and nodded. “Fine. But it can’t take too long.”
Luke smiled and held up three fingers. “Halfblood’s honor.”
-
You didn’t know where to start.
There were far more people than you expected, not nearly enough beds for all of them, and half were talking and a quarter were fighting and the others were just completely unfazed. All you could do when you walked in was stare.
“You get used to it,” Luke said, glancing over at you. “Everyone’s nice, I promise—just keep a hand on your pockets.”
You frowned. “Why?”
He gave you a crooked smile. “Hermes is the god of thieves. We learn by experience in this cabin.”
Your hands instinctively reached back to the pockets of your jeans, despite the fact that you hardly had anything to your name. “Why do they put the new, naive kids in here again?”
“God of travellers, too—all are welcome.” Luke saw your hand shoot to your pocket and laughed. “Don’t worry. I won’t let anyone mess with you too much—for now, at least.”
“Oh, good,” you said lightly. “The hazing doesn’t start until later.”
Luke smiled as he continued to guide you through the cabin, nodding to and greeting campers with equal parts names and handshakes as he walked past them. You got just as many stares as Luke did hellos, and your skin crawled at the attention.
“Why are they all looking at me?” you whispered to him.
“Like I said, you’re the first new camper in a while.” Luke glanced at you. “News spreads fast, especially in this wreck of a place.”
“It’s not that bad,” you said , but your grip tightened on your backpack strap. “Just very busy.”
“That’s what happens when they shove everyone in here,” Luke said. “All are welcome means all are welcome—Hermes kids, unclaimed kids, and kids of minor gods.”
You frowned. “Minor gods don’t have cabins?”
“This place is as much for us as it is in honor of the gods,” he said. “Twelve cabins for twelve Olympians. They don’t see it as a problem, therefore we can’t see it as a problem.”
You decided to bite your tongue, but you couldn’t hide your sigh. “I guess I’m gonna be here for the time being.”
He looked you up and down, and all you could think was that you must look like an absolute disaster. “I’m guessing you fall into the unclaimed.”
Your lips pressed into a thin line, a sad attempt at a smile. “Yeah, but I just got here—I bet my mom doesn’t even know it yet. Gods are busy.”
“They’re also omniscient,” Luke said wryly. “I’m sure she could have claimed you the second you crossed the border. Your parent could’ve given you a little divine intervention and kept you from nearly dying on the hill.”
“Well, I’m here for now,” you said with a bit too much force, and your nails dug into your palms. “So do you mind showing me around?”
Luke stared at you for a moment before he smiled. “‘Course not. I can also give you a quick tour of camp too, if you haven’t already gotten one.”
You shook your head. “Only the infirmary.”
“If it makes you feel any better,” he said, “you heal up well.”
“I don’t think that’s a credit to me,” you said. “I think it’s whatever magical drink that healer gave me while he was trying to bring me back. Tasted like pecan pie.”
“Nectar,” he said as he started walking, and you followed behind him. “Drink of the gods that heals demigods in small portions. It tastes like your favorite food—same as ambrosia.” He stopped in an empty corner and looked at you. “You like pecans?”
You shrugged, suddenly self conscious. “My dad makes it the best.”
“I hope you’ll be able to get the real thing soon,” he said, and then he gestured with a flourish at the same empty corner. “Welcome to your new home.”
You stared at him. “This is the floor.”
“We’re a little overbooked,” Luke said sheepishly. “If it makes you feel better, we’ve got sleeping bags. And this is a top tier corner. Quieter than the others.”
“…Great,” you said. “I feel very welcome.”
“I’m sorry.” To his credit, he sounded like he meant it. “Bunch of unclaimed kids, couple kids of minor gods, couple Hermes kids—it all kinda adds up to a mess.”
“...It’ll be better than camping,” you said, though mostly to yourself as you took your bag off your shoulder and let it thud to the ground.
“Hey,” Luke said, and his voice was softer, “it’ll be okay. With any luck, your parent’ll notice you now that you’re at camp, and you’ll be claimed before you know it.”
“I hope so,” you murmured.
“Luke, who’s the new girl?”
A boy with curls just as good as Luke’s walked up and clapped him on the back, smiling at you in a way that instantly set you at ease. He also wore the orange camp shirt, with long tan sleeves below that he’d pushed up to his forearms. He had kind eyes.
Luke said your name, his own smirk on his lips as he looked back at you. “You’ve probably heard about her dramatic entrance by now, but she’s the newest resident of the Hermes cabin.”
“Unclaimed or your sibling?” he asked.
“...Unclaimed,” you said yourself. You hadn’t even been here for more than two hours and it already felt like your own brand of shame.
He repeated your name with a nod and held out his hand. “I’m Chris,” he said. “Fellow unclaimed kid.”
A little bit less of a scarlet letter, at least. You swallowed your budding insecurity and shook his hand. “Sounds like a shitty club to be in.”
He snorted. “You’re telling me.”
“How— how long has it been?” you asked hesitantly, almost afraid to know the answer.
His lips pressed into a tight smile. “Couple years.”
“Gods,” you murmured. You didn’t know if you’d be able to wait that long. It had been hard enough already growing up without one—if your mother was just out of reach after all this time, you would surely lose your mind.
“Don’t worry,” Chris said, his expression softening a bit. “It won’t take that long for you. I can tell.”
“That’s what Luke said,” you responded wryly. “Do I give off a vibe that says ‘I’m unwanted, but not for too long’?”
Luke laughed and shook his head. “I promise, it’s all gonna be okay. I’ve been the counselor here for a couple months—kids get claimed all the time. I bet you’re next on the list.”
“Maybe,” you said. You didn’t believe it as much as they did—if they did at all.
You heard the door open and your head automatically turned to the noise, and you felt the heat rush to your cheeks in embarrassment as Tate came through, slightly out of breath. You stared at Luke—he said thirty minutes at least. He just shrugged.
“I figured you would be here,” Tate said, his chest rising and falling just so as he walked—trotted?—inside. “You didn’t exactly wait.”
You opened your mouth to speak up, but Luke beat you, already putting on a charming smile. “Sorry. We got to talking, and then I offered to show her around the Hermes cabin. Just so she could put her things down, y’know.”
“‘Course,” Tate nodded. “That— that was probably a good idea. Would have been bad if you got lost or something.”
“I’m sorry,” you said, and you went to pick your bag up. “Luke said you would be talking for a lot longer— I was going to come back after I was done with this.”
Tate shook his head. That nervous energy from the worst parts of the road was back, and you wondered how badly the talk with Chiron and Mr. D went. “No, it was a good idea. Better than you getting lost around camp or caught up with some troublemakers. Thanks, Luke.”
“‘Course,” he said.
“Not sure she’s in much better hands with Luke,” Chris said wryly. “He’s head troublemaker in the cabin of troublemakers.”
Luke just chuckled and shook his head. “It’s her first day. I wouldn’t let anything happen to her.”
You were only able to glance at Luke for a moment before your attention was drawn back to Tate as he gestured outside with his head. “Chiron’s waiting outside. He wants to talk to you some before the tour.”
And now you had to deal with it too. “...Great,” you said. You set your bag back on the ground, in your newly coveted corner.
“It’ll be fine,” Tate promised. “You already went through Hades to get here— he’s not gonna pile on you more. That’s why Mr. D is back at the Big House.”
This time, you did look at Luke. Thankfully, he understood.
“Dionysus,” he explained. “He’s our camp director.”
You blinked. “The god?”
“Yep,” he nodded. “Punishment from Zeus. Not the worst gig, but he’s… interesting.”
“Great,” you repeated, because you didn’t feel like processing that at the moment, and you looked back at Tate. “You’ll be with me, right?”
He nodded. “Not for the talk, but for the tour.”
You let out a loose breath, because it was going to be fine. He was just the authority figure of the one safe place in the world for you, and you were just an annoying kid that had no idea what the hell was going on.
“Great,” you said for the third time. You looked back at Luke. “I’ll see you around?”
He smiled and bowed his head. “Definitely. You do kinda live here indefinitely now.”
You nodded, more relieved than you wanted to show, and you started following Tate out.
You heard Chris mutter something to Luke, and you turned your head in time to see Luke jab him in the side. His head perked up when you laughed, and his whole expression changed as his smile returned and he did a little wave.
You couldn’t help but smile back as you did the same, and you left the cabin with a little pep in your step.
—
“You promise you’ll be safe.”
“Yes, Tate,” you said with a slight laugh. “The worst is already over—you got me here, and we’re both alive. I’m gonna be fine.”
“I know,” he said, and he managed his own smile. “I’m just worried about you. You don’t spend two weeks on the road fighting for your life with someone and not get a little attached.”
“You’ll be back here, right?” you asked. “I know your whole thing as a Protector, but you’ve gotta drop the demigods off too, right?”
“Of course I’ll be back,” he promised. “It… just might be a while. You’re the third demigod I’ve gotten to camp safely, now—Chiron’s trusting me with a bigger mission. It might be a couple months, but I’ll be back.”
“And you’re telling me to be safe,” you said wryly.
“I’ve been doing this for a while,” he said. “You just got here.”
“I know,” you said, and you pulled him into a hug. “Just don’t get killed out there.”
Tate laughed and patted you on the back before he pulled away. “So long as you don’t killed out here.”
“Thanks for everything,” you said with a nod.
“Thank you,” he said, and he gestured at the pavilion with his head. “Now get over there and make some friends. I’ll see you around.”
You hugged him one last time before you reluctantly went off, and you looked back to wave him goodbye before you really started on your way.
Your head still spun with all the information Chiron and Tate had imparted on you—so much about Greek mythology (and how it was all real), ADHD and dyslexia (and how they weren’t just there to make your life harder), your godly parent (who would hopefully claim you within the month) and so much more that you knew you would forget in an hour or two.
And Chiron’s talk. God, it felt more like you were in the principal’s office than anything, even though he was nothing but kind. You couldn’t help but be overwhelmed from it all, and though the talk was probably meant to stave some of that anxiety off, it really didn’t.
But you’d always felt out of place all your life. And now you were finally where you were meant to belong—that had to count for something.
Tate had dropped you off at the pavilion—nearly dying had taken a lot out of you, and it just happened to be lunch—and just as you neared the tables and realized you had no idea where to sit, your eyes were drawn to a boy raising his hand and calling your name.
You looked over and saw that it was Luke, the counselor from earlier, and you couldn’t help but smile. True to his word.
You weaved your way through various campers and around tables full of kids to finally stop next to Luke’s table—Chris, the guy from earlier, sat across from him, and they both smiled at you.
“How’d the tour go?” he asked.
“Fine,” you said with a nod. “A little overwhelming, but better than I thought.” You pulled at your new camp shirt, the fabric noticeably brighter than a majority of those around you. “I match now, at least.”
“Orange suits you,” Luke remarked, and he patted the open spot next to him. “Sit down—stay for a while.”
You chuckled as you sat down. You still felt out of place, but at least they weren’t going to hang you out to dry. “Bright orange seems like an odd choice when we’re trying to stay hidden.”
“Probably so Chiron doesn’t lose us,” he joked. “This place is huge, and there’s a lot of us. When the newest camper gets turned around in the woods during capture the flag and nearly dies to a monster, it’s easier to find them.”
You frowned, and you must’ve not been very good at hiding your panic because Chris shook his head.
“Luke, you’re scaring her. She’s already been through enough.”
“Don’t worry,” Luke said, patting you on the shoulder. “Just a little halfblood humor. You’re gonna be fine, I promise.”
“It doesn’t feel that way,” you said wryly. “It feels like I nearly died four hours ago and now I have no idea who anyone is or what to do.”
“Not true,” Chris spoke up, and he smiled. “You know us.”
“I’ll look out for you,” Luke promised. “And pretty soon, you’re gonna be good enough to look out for me.”
You let out a long lasting sigh. “God, I hope so.”
—
“You’re not holding it right.”
You adjusted your hold on the hilt, resisting the urge to wipe away the bead of sweat dripping down your forehead and the even stronger urge to hit him.
“You’re still not holding it right.”
Your teeth grinded together as you turned to look at Luke. “Are you gonna actually help me, or just stand there judgmentally?”
“I dunno,” he said. “The weather’s pretty good over here.”
You groaned and moved your non-dominant hand closer to the pommel, shifting your other down as well. “Is this worthy of your approval, Your Majesty?”
Luke chuckled as he walked over to you, and you could feel the calluses on his hands as he adjusted your form with slight touches to your arms. “It is acceptable, my lady, but your posture is not.”
“I don’t know how so many people at this camp like you,” you grumbled. “This is awful, and so are you.”
He smiled. “You’ve been here for two weeks. Give yourself some grace.”
“I’ve spent one of those trying and failing at the most basic basics of sword-fighting,” you said. “I spent the past hour losing to an Ares kid who I’m pretty sure actually wanted to kill me.” You looked over at Luke. “Thanks for that, by the way.”
“Trial by fire,” he supplied. “You’re still alive, so obviously you’re doing something right.”
“Yeah, probably because you’re here,” you said. “You can’t just kill someone when their counselor’s standing right next to them. It’s bad publicity.”
Luke huffed a laugh and shook his head as he crossed his arms. “Stop talking down on yourself. You managed to make it here with a couple monster attacks on the way—what’d you use then?”
“I started off with a screwdriver I stole from the garage before Tate and I left,” you said. “And then I stole a hunting knife from some outdoor store. Not exactly top-tier.”
“Lotta stealing,” Luke chuckled. “Maybe you are a Hermes kid.”
“They nearly caught me,” you said. “Definitely not.”
“Regardless of thievery, you still survived,” he continued. “You’re not a bonafide swordsman, that’s fine. But you’re resourceful, creative—scrappy in a fight is just what we need sometimes.”
“Great,” you mumbled. “I’m ‘scrappy’.”
“It’s a compliment,” he promised. “If we were all sword-fighters, we wouldn’t get far. Someone like you is gonna do us a lot of good.”
“If I don’t die before I even get out to the battlefield.” You knocked the helmet off of one of the straw dummies with your sword and sighed as it clattered to the ground. “This is the only enemy I stand a chance against.”
“You’re thinking too much about it all,” Luke said. “You’re literally wired for battle—didn’t you feel it during your fights on the way to camp?”
You shrugged. You guess you did—you remember not even taking the time to analyze the situation, just knowing your lives were in danger and finally feeling the ever-present jitters in your bones settle for the first time.
“It was rough,” you finally said. “But… it did feel like I knew what I was doing. Like my body understood it all even when my mind was still a couple steps behind.”
“And that was without training, and with,” Luke huffed an incredulous laugh, “a screwdriver. Just imagine what you’ll be able to do with actual Celestial bronze and actual training.”
“…I think I remember why people like you,” you said reluctantly. “And why I liked you.”
Luke grinned as he stood up. “That’s the spirit.” He picked up the fallen helmet and placed it back on the dummy, then looked at you. “I think I’ve put you through enough suffering. Let’s get lunch.”
“So a compliment was all it took for me to get out of this?” you asked in exasperation, gesturing with your sword as you worked to undo the ties on your armor with your other hand.
“Exactly,” he mused, and he took the sword from you to store it away. “I don’t get nearly enough compliments these days, y’know. Sometimes you end up taking that out on campers that don’t know how to swordfight.”
“Luke Castellan,” you grumbled as you finally got your breastplate off, “you are a piece of work.”
He winked. “Thank you.”
—
You didn’t think you were built for this life.
It was the only thought running through your head as you sat at a crowded Hermes table, absentmindedly picking at fruit with your fork as you stared off into the distance.
You’d been at Camp Halfblood for a month now, but it had already felt like a lifetime.
You’d managed to make a few friends—a Demeter girl who grew you a bouquet of your favorite flowers as a consolation prize for fighting dirty during training; an Athena boy who told you whatever interesting fact popped into his head first every time you ran into each other; the Hebe girl who had the misfortune to have the corner opposite you in the Hermes cabin and showed you skincare tips once in a while.
Throw in a smattering of Hermes and unclaimed kids and a counselor that seemed determined to make you smile, and you weren’t as lonely as you thought you’d be.
You were learning how to fight in your own way. Luke was right—you weren’t a swordsman, but you were damn good up close and personal. He’d taken you to the camp armory, you found a Celestial bronze dagger that spoke to you, and from then on you’d actually been doing well in training.
Your corner of the Hermes cabin didn’t feel as sad anymore, either. Luke took you to the camp store for retail therapy after you nearly burned your jeans off on the climbing wall, so now you had an AC/DC poster (courtesy of the little money you had) and an I ❤️ NY keychain to attach to your backpack (courtesy of Luke’s idle hands).
You were starting to come into your own, sure. You were doing better in training and making friends in the cabin you were stuck in and starting to get used to burning part of every meal, but the most glaring issue of all still hadn’t been resolved.
You still hadn’t been claimed.
And maybe it shouldn’t have been such an issue for you, but how could you not feel shitty? How could you see all the different tables and all the different kids talking and smiling and joking with each other that had parents who cared enough to at least claim them, and not feel unworthy?
Because you did. You felt unworthy, and it didn’t matter how many times you took your sparring partner down or bested the climbing wall or actually hit the bullseye at archery practice—your mother didn’t think you were good enough, so neither did you.
“How’re you doin’, Berkeley?”
You frowned. You didn’t have to look up to know it was Luke as he sat down next to you. “What?”
“Did you not hear me?” he asked, but you were already shaking your head.
“Berkeley,” you repeated, finally glancing at him. “That’s not my name.”
Luke shrugged. “I dunno what to tell you. You’re unclaimed. UC. University of California—first one I think of for you is Berkeley.”
You were staring now. “You can’t be serious.”
“Oh, I’ve got tons of UCs. I’ve gotta keep track of them all somehow,” Luke said, and he pointed at campers both at your table and walking around as he talked. “That’s LA, Irvine, Davis—the others aren’t here, but you get the gist.” He looked back at you. “Been savin’ Berkeley for someone special.”
“Oh gods,” you said, horrified. “I’ve got to get claimed.”
One of the girls at the table—Irvine?—rolled her eyes as she stood up and flicked Luke on the head. “Be nice,” she said before walking away. All he did was smile.
“Maybe give it to someone else,” you said. “I don’t feel special.”
Luke’s brows creased. “If you don’t like it—”
“It’s fine,” you said. “The name doesn’t bother me. The reason I have it does.”
His eyes softened as he said your actual name. “It’s only been a month. You’ve still got plenty of time.”
You looked across at the Hebe girl you’d become friends with—Marisol, if you remembered right—and hoped that your eyes didn’t show the desperation you felt. “How long did it take for you?”
She offered a sympathetic smile. “Six months. But it probably won’t be that long for you.”
“That’s what everyone keeps saying,” you mumbled. But it had been a month, and you hadn’t gotten a single sign.
“Because it’s true,” Luke urged. “Whoever your mom is will notice you—you’ve been killing it lately.”
“Really,” you said flatly, “I’ve been killing it.”
“Yes,” he said. “You don’t know it because you’ve only got your own experience—you went from nearly dead on our doorstep to taking down most of your opponents.”
“In training,” you said.
“That still counts!” Luke exclaimed. “Y’know, you’re holding yourself back. You’re incredible, but you’re the only one that seems to not notice it.”
“And my—”
“Do not say your mom,” he said, pointing a finger at you. “We’re not talking about the gods right now, we’re talking about you. And you, Bee, are killing it.”
That gave you pause. “Bee?”
“I’m trying to get you back up and you focus on the nickname?” Luke asked wryly.
“Just explain it,” you said.
“Bee shortened from Berkeley,” he said. “Not fully unclaimed, but still something special.”
God, you hated him. You’d been feeling shitty for a majority of your month here, but he always managed to make you smile.
“Sure,” you said.
“And a little annoying,” he added, earning himself a jab in the side as he laughed, “with a bit of a sting.”
“Aren’t you just so clever?” you mused, though you couldn’t help your smile widening.
“It’s in my genes,” he said proudly.
For the rest of a less than exciting lunch, Luke kept you occupied. Whether it was stories of his life before camp, or the couple of months that earned him counselor before you got here, or getting the other campers at the Hermes table to talk about themselves, he made sure you didn’t get a chance to spiral.
By the end, your face hurt from smiling
As you finished cleaning up, Marisol turned to you. “Me and a couple other girls were gonna go play volleyball—do you wanna come with us?”
“Yeah,” you said, and your smile grew. “Yeah, I’d love to. Thanks.”
“‘Course!” she exclaimed, and she linked arms with you. “I’d be a fool not to get you on my team after you took down Liam yesterday.”
She continued to talk as she pulled you along, and you looked back at Luke. He chuckled and gave you a thumbs up. “Go get ‘em, Bee!”
You gave him one back, and as you turned back to Marisol, you found that you couldn’t stop smiling.
—
It was two in the morning and you couldn’t stop crying.
You finally had a mattress against your back, and however stiff it was, it was better than the floor. A decent amount of kids got claimed over the past month, and half the cabin left after the summer was over, so you finally had the privilege of a bunk—thankfully, Marisol did too, and she was below you.
At least, until the summer-only campers that all the Hermes kids liked more than you returned. Then it was back to the floor.
Unless you got claimed before then. But that was less likely than being able to muster some good will from your cabin mates.
Because it was embarrassing, truly. You’d been at camp for four months now, and you hadn’t even gotten a single goddamn peep from whoever your mother might be. You just woke up every day on the floor, moseyed about a camp that still didn’t feel like home, burned offerings to a god that didn't want you, and went back to sleep on the floor.
And now you were crying in a bed that was barely even yours and it was two in the morning and you were wondering if it would have just been better for you to die on the road to camp the first time, because at least then your mother might have actually paid attention to you.
“Hey.”
And now you were really wishing you’d died because you’d woken someone up and they’re just gonna hate you more—
“Are you okay?”
You finally turned your head from where it had been buried in a pillow, a laissez-faire attempt to suffocate yourself or maybe just muffle the noise, and you saw Luke Castellan. Counselor of a cabin of thieves, vagabonds, and rejects, and maybe the only person that you didn’t want to see you like this. All that good will, the unearned faith you’d accumulated—this was the easiest way to lose it. His eyebrows were creased, and his whisper held what sounded like concern, but he was required to be concerned.
You nodded, still not moving, still not speaking. Tears rolled down your cheeks and stained the bed sheet.
“You’re gonna have to be a little more believable than that, Bee,” Luke murmured.
“No, I don’t,” you whispered back.
You got the tiniest huff of a laugh out of him, and he gestured towards the closed door with his head. “Wanna take a second?”
“It’s past curfew,” you mumbled.
“And you’re miserable,” Luke said. “You can’t feel any worse getting eaten by harpies than you do now.”
Still, you stared at him.
“It’ll be okay,” he promised. “Right outside the cabin. Harpies won’t even know.”
You rubbed a hand across your face, coming away wet with tears, and you realized that he wasn’t just going to leave you like this. So you got up as quietly as you could, careful not to disturb your bunkmates, and followed Luke. He pushed the door open and shut so quietly you wondered how many times he’s snuck out.
The cold air was sobering, and you wiped away more tears before wrapping your arms around yourself. Camp Half-Blood was always supposed to have perfect weather, but you guess not even they were immune to November nights.
“So,” Luke started, and in your peripherals you could see him leaning against the side of the cabin. You could feel his gaze on you, and you just stared off into the distance.
“So,” you repeated.
“You wanna tell me why you’re crying in the middle of the night?” he asked.
“Not really,” you said, because it felt ridiculous that a boy your age was acting like he’s ten years your elder.
Luke chuckled and tipped his head. “Fair. You want to say anything at all?”
“I’m sorry for waking you up.”
He shook his head. “I was already up. I’m a light sleeper.”
“Seems rough in a cabin like this,” you said.
“I’ve gotten used to it,” he said. “Did you have a nightmare?”
You frowned, because now it really felt like he was babying you. Luke must have caught on, because he laughed a bit and shook his head.
“Demigods have… extremely vivid dreams,” he said. “Typically horrific nightmares. Sometimes prophetic.”
Your frown deepened. “That’s awful.”
Luke shrugged. “It’s just the way it is. The gods can’t interfere in mortal affairs, so I guess it’s their way of letting us know what’s wrong.”
You shook your head with a sigh. “No nightmares, thankfully. Just… feeling overwhelmed.”
“About what?” he asked. “I told you you’ve been doing great.”
“It doesn’t matter how many times you say it,” you said wryly. “It doesn’t mean I believe it.”
“There’s no reason you shouldn’t,” he asserted.
You huffed a laugh. “It’s been four months, Luke. Four months since I got here after nearly dying in five different states, and I don’t even know who’s responsible for it.”
“Ah,” Luke said. “The unclaimed thing.”
“Yeah,” you said wryly. “I guess you could call it that.”
“Sorry,” he said, and he shook his head. “It’s a bigger deal than that, I know.”
“Maybe it isn’t,” you said. “There’s at least six other kids in there dealing with the same thing as I am, and none of them are waking up their counselor in the middle of the night with their tears.”
“Don’t talk about yourself like that,” Luke said with surprising conviction. “Like your feelings aren’t valid. Because they are.”
You crossed your arms. “Doesn’t seem like it.”
“They are,” he insisted. “A— and you’re not bothering me. We’re friends, and we help each other. I care about you, y’know.”
“I never said I was bothering you,” you said wryly.
“You thought it,” Luke said. “I know you did.”
“...Maybe.” You sighed and shook your head as you looked out at the stars. They really were beautiful here. “I just can’t help but be bitter about all this, and I feel so shitty about it.”
“Would it make you feel better to know you’re not the only one that thinks that?” he asked.
“A little, yeah.” You glanced at him. “No one else seems too bothered that their parents are never around.”
“Most of them have accepted that it’s just the way it is,” he said. “Doesn’t mean you have to.”
“Have you?”
Luke sighed after a moment of reluctance. “I… I have a complicated relationship with my dad because he was around. It was almost… worse to know him, and then to have him leave.”
“It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all,” you quoted.
“I don’t know about that,” Luke murmured. “But it certainly helps to talk about it.”
You glanced over to see him gazing off into the distance, a look in his eye that you couldn’t quite place. This was the most he’d ever talked about his past to you, you realized—and it still wasn’t much.
“When were you claimed?” you asked after a moment of contemplation.
Luke shrugged. “I never really had to be. Hermes stayed with my mom for a year after I was born, and she told me who he was when I was a little older. I’ve known basically my whole life—he had no reason not to claim me as soon as I got to camp.”
“So you’re saying my dad could be keeping secrets from me too,” you said.
“He might not know,” Luke said. “A lot of times, they don’t talk about it. Sometimes, we don’t find out until a monster’s trying to kill us on a field trip.”
You huffed. “What a great existence we’ve been blessed with.”
Luke smiled, though it was tighter than usual. He let out a deep breath, then fully turned to you.
“Do you have your dagger with you?”
You frowned. “It’s under my pillow. Why?”
“Under your—” Luke stared for a moment before he laughed and shook his head. “A little paranoid?”
You shrugged. “You said it yourself. You’re a cabin of thieves.”
“True,” he admitted. “How’d you like to get some of this emotion out?”
“We’re sneaking out even more?”
“It’ll be fine,” Luke promised.
“You always say that,” you said. “Eventually, it’s not gonna be true.”
He laughed and gestured at the door. “Get your dagger. We’re gonna make this a very bad night for some mannequins.”
-
“Maybe this wasn’t a good idea.”
You huffed as you ripped your dagger out of the dummy, a few strands of straw coming out of the new hole you’d torn in its forehead, and wiped the sweat off your forehead. “Are you kidding? This was a great idea.”
“Not this part,” he said. “The ‘being alone with you during a rage’ part.”
“I’m not in a rage,” you muttered as you slashed at the breastplate, “I’m blowing off steam.”
Luke hummed. “And you thought you weren’t a good fighter.”
You stabbed at the armor again then rammed your fist into its head, and you took a step back as the mannequin thudded to the ground. “I guess I just need to think about my mom before I go into battle.”
“Y’know, Bee,” Luke said, “you scare me sometimes.”
You shook your head, wiping your blade on your night shirt to get any debris off as you turned around. “You’re really gonna stick with that?”
“I told you I’d stop if you didn’t like it.”
“It’s not that. I just…” You sighed and shook your head again. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Of course it does.” Luke crossed his arms. “Everything you have to say matters.”
“Not if I say it doesn’t,” you countered, and you looked at him. “Who do you think it could be?”
“Your parent?” he asked. You nodded.
“Definitely not Apollo,” Luke said. “You’re way too dreary to be a kid of the god of the sun.”
“Gee,” you said dryly, “thanks.”
Luke shrugged. “You asked.”
“Well— who else?” You picked the dummy back up and dusted the armor off. “Athena, maybe? I’m smart.”
“Not smart enough to not be out past curfew with me,” he said.
“You suggested this,” you scoffed. “And I definitely needed it. If we get caught, I’m blaming you.”
“And why do you think that would work?” he asked, amused.
“You’re the camp’s golden boy,” you said. “I doubt you’d get in much trouble.”
“Sure, sure,” he said, nodding. “Or you just think I’m good enough to talk my way out of it.”
You tilted your head. “That too.”
“I never thought Ares before,” Luke chuckled, “but after all this, I think you might have it in you.”
“God, I hope not. Priya hates me.”
“She doesn’t hate you,” Luke said. “She just tried to kill you that one time.”
“And that other time during capture the flag,” you said. “She’s out for blood, Luke.”
He chuckled and shook his head. “She always is. She’s probably already moved onto her next victim.”
“I hope so.”
“Maybe Aphrodite?” he suggested. “You’re awfully pretty.”
You rolled your eyes. “Flattery will get you nowhere.”
“It’s not flattery if it’s true,” Luke corrected.
You huffed a laugh but couldn’t help the slightest smile as you shook your head. “It’s not Tyche, at least. I have the worst luck.”
“Maybe you’re a Big Three kid,” he said. “How do you feel about the sky?”
“I like it,” you said.
“The ocean?”
“Not so much.”
“And the darkness?”
You huffed a dry laugh. “I’m not a Big Three kid, Luke. Even I know that.”
“No, you don’t,” he said. “You can never know for sure until you’re claimed.”
“If I was, I would be the biggest disappointment,” you said, looking at your reflection in your dagger. “Breaking their pact for a kid that can barely fight.”
“Why do you always do that?”
Luke’s voice had lost the joking edge from before, and when you glanced over at him, he was frowning.
“Do what?”
“You always put yourself down,” he said. “You don’t even give yourself a chance to believe that you’ll be great, or that you’ll succeed—you’re just a coward, or a failure, or worthless at the first bump in the road.”
“Luke—”
“No,” he said, shaking his head. “I need you to understand that you are so, so much more than whatever that shitty voice in your head says.”
You went silent. Any words you could have even said stuck in your throat.
“This is not an easy life,” Luke asserted. “We’re thrown into an ocean before we know how to swim, and we have to find the shore all on our own or die trying. We—” he laughed, but there was no heart in it— “we’ve got our parents above us that could guide us, could save us, but most of the time they refuse to even acknowledge us. And we’ve got every single goddamn obstacle in the way trying to kill us.”
He inclined his head towards you. “But in spite of all that, you’re alive. You’re still here. You’re pushing through everything in your path, and you are still fucking here. Do you get that?”
“…I’m still here,” you repeated, and your hands clenched into fists. It had never felt more right to have your dagger in your hand.
Luke nodded resolutely. “And you’ve got a couple lifeboats to help along the way.”
“You mean it?” Your voice came out softer than you thought, in stark contrast to the stiffness of your bones, but you felt like a kid all over again.
“With all my heart,” he promised. “For as long as you’re here, I’ll be here.”
Your throat tightened, and the telltale beginnings of tears pricked behind your eyes. This time, when you spoke, your voice was little more than a whisper. “Thank you.”
“Always,” he said. “And I mean that.”
You nodded, maybe a few too many times, and cleared your throat as you looked back at your dagger. “It’s late. We should get back before we actually get in trouble.”
Luke nodded too, and he helped you move the dummy back into place. You hated how your heart jumped into your throat when your hands brushed for the barest moment, but thankfully, he didn’t seem to notice.
“Thank you for this.” You played with your hands as Luke finished putting everything else away—extra insurance to make sure no one knew you were here—and only managed to make eye contact just as he looked at you. “It… it really helped.” More than he knew, you were sure.
Luke smiled, and he offered you his arm. “Always.”
You took it, ignoring the heat in your cheeks. “Just… don’t tell anyone about the crying.”
He chuckled as you started walking together. “After the way you’ve been handling that dagger? I’d be a fool.“
-
“Luke,” you groaned, “this is awful.”
“You were the one who said you wanted to spend time with me,” he said, giving you a crooked smile. “Spending time with me after the worst cabin inspection ever means cleaning the place head to toe for our next one.”
“Is skipping dinner really worth it though?” you asked as you scooped up a pile of dirty clothes and tossed it into the basket between you two.
“It’s the only time this place is completely empty,” he said. “I told you I could handle it alone—you’re the one that insisted on helping.”
“Maybe I do want to be a Big Three kid,” you grumbled. “At least I’d only be cleaning up my own mess.”
“You’d also have the wrath of the gods and every monster in the world to deal with,” he said.
You shook your head. “A small price to pay for a clean cabin.”
“And then you wouldn’t get to see me when you wake up every day,” he mused. “A much bigger price to pay.”
You huffed as you dropped to your knees, reaching under a bed to grab a stray camp tee. “Keep talking, pretty boy. It won’t clean the floors.”
Luke grinned. “You think I’m pretty?”
“I think you’ve got the messiest cabin in the world,” you said. “We’ve gotten the lowest rating every day for the past two weeks. I’ve been here for seven months now, and I don’t think we’ve ever gotten a full five.”
“Which is why you’re helping me!” he said. “Because you’re as sick of scrubbing the pegasi stables as I am.”
“You’re the counselor here!” you exclaimed. “You’ve gotta whip your siblings into shape.”
Luke gestured at you. “You’re basically my co-counselor. It’s just as much your responsibility.”
“And just what makes you think that?” you marveled.
“You’re the person in the cabin I like the most,” he said, “and we spend a lot of time together. That’s enough to make you my partner.”
“My stuff is always clean,” you said. “It’s you and the rest of the Hermes kids that’ve gotten us stuck in the stables and the kitchens every afternoon. Not me.”
You started remaking the unmade bed—would it kill any of the Hermes kids to make theirs right after they got up?—and shook your head. “It’s just not fair. Aphrodite’s cabin is basically Barbie’s Dreamhouse, and Demeter kids can grow plants to make it all pretty. We’ve just got a cabin of slobs.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he said, but when you glanced at him, you saw he was smiling. “It’ll all be fine.”
“You always say that.” You got the fitted sheet into all the corners then looked at him full-on. “Even when it’s not about something as stupid as laundry. How do you know?”
Luke shrugged as he nudged a ladder to a top bunk back into place. “I don’t. I just hope for the best.”
“How do you do that?” you asked. “How does anyone here do that? I feel like I’m the most pessimistic person here.”
“Every single one of us is an anomaly,” Luke said. “Freaks of nature. By all accounts of logic, we shouldn’t exist. But we do. All of mythology does. And when we have to literally fight for our lives for every single day, it doesn’t do much good to sweat the small stuff.”
“All I do is sweat the small stuff,” you grumbled, and you stretched your back out before you continued. “D’you think they’ll get annoyed that we just pooled all their laundry together again?”
“Nah,” Luke said. “If they didn’t want to have to pick all their stuff out after we so graciously do the laundry for them, they would keep their things clean in the first place.”
You chuckled and shook your head as you finished laying out the sorry excuse for a comforter—it would end up on the floor five seconds into the night, but Sisyphus and the boulder and all that—and sat down on the fruits of your labor. “I think this mess is the one thing I won’t miss when I get claimed.”
“You’re not as down about that as you used to be,” Luke noted.
“You know how they say a watched pot never boils?”
He actually laughed at that as he leaned against a bed post. “If you don’t care, you’ll get claimed faster?”
You shrugged. “Nothing else has worked. And like you said—don’t sweat the small stuff, right?”
“Like you said— all you do is sweat the small stuff.”
“Maybe I’m gonna try and turn over a new leaf,” you mused.
“I think that would be good for you,” he said. “You’ve been happier lately. It’s good to see you happy.”
“You’ve been watching?” you asked wryly.
Luke smiled. “You know I always am.”
You ignored the warmth stirring in your chest as you shrugged. “I’ve spent way too much time this year being sad over things I can’t control. Might as well start focusing on the things I can.”
“And to think,” he mused, “this is the same girl that wanted nothing to do with me when we first talked.”
“Oh, please,” you said dryly, “I’ve always wanted something to do with you.”
“And you still understand that flattery gets you everywhere,” Luke said with a grin. He pushed himself up and held out his hand. “C’mon—this place is clean enough. I think if we run, we can still make dinner.”
“Think we’ll get in trouble for partially skipping?” you asked as you stood up and took his hand, swinging your intertwined hands a bit as you walked together.
Luke chuckled as he pushed the door open and you walked out. “After the work we did here? We should be hailed as saints.”
-
“Luke,” you whispered.
His eyes shot wide open as he jolted up, and you had to stifle your laugh at his bewildered expression before he realized it was you.
He said your name groggily, rubbing his eyes as he kept himself propped up with his other arm. “What d’you need?”
“The stars,” you said. “They’re beautiful tonight.”
“So are you,” he mumbled. “You don’t see me waking you up in the middle of the night to tell you that.”
“Luke,” you said, but you couldn’t help your smile. “On topic.”
“The stars,” he said, barely nodding in his addled state. “Good for them. I’m going back to sleep now.”
“No, Luke—” you laughed softly and took his hand. “Come stargazing with me.”
He closed his eyes, but he didn’t take his hand away. “You’re insane.”
“Please,” you said. “I could never see the stars at home, not like this. They’re brighter than I’ve ever seen.”
“It’s so late,” he complained. “Can we do it in the morning?”
“Do you know what stargazing is?” you asked, amused.
“Hey, lovebirds.” The annoyed, tired voice of a camper rang out as they hit the wall. “Take it outside so we can sleep.”
Again, you had to bite back a laugh. Luke looked like he was holding back a groan, but he got up anyway, rubbing the grogginess out of his eyes. You moved to the door as quietly as possible, and you waited until he joined you on the small porch.
“Thank you,” you said, hearing the door close, “and sorry.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Luke covered up his yawn as he held a jacket out for you. “Put this on. I’m not gonna be responsible for you getting a cold because you want to stargaze in February.”
Your eyebrows rose as you took it. “Is this yours?”
“Don’t think too much into it,” he said, but he had the slightest smile on his lips. “You wanna see the stars, right? Let’s see ‘em.”
“Not here,” you said, shaking your head as you zipped up the maroon hoodie. You held out your hand once you finished. “Do you trust me?”
“Oh, gods,” he muttered, running a hand through his messy hair. “We’re doing a trust exercise too?”
“I’ll take that as a yes,” you remarked. You took his hand and started dragging him along, a clear spot in mind.
“You’re kidding me,” he said in exasperation. “I thought we were just gonna look at the sky for a couple minutes— you’re taking me to a second destination?”
“Hey,” you said, “don’t sweat the small stuff.”
“Oh, I can’t wait to use that on the harpies when they catch us and eat us,” Luke said offhandedly. “‘I’m sorry, ma’am—we’re really trying not to sweat the small stuff.’”
You laughed as you continued on your way, and out of the corner of your eye you could see Luke smiling too, despite himself. Suddenly, though, his grip tightened on your hand and he pulled you behind one of the thicker columns of the pavilion.
“Wh—”
He shook his head then gestured with it to the other side of the pavilion. One of the harpies—Aello, if you remembered correctly from Chris’s rant the past week about cleaning dishes—was walking past, muttering things to herself.
“Speak of the devil,” you marveled. You definitely weren’t a child of Tyche.
Luke gave you a look that quite clearly said be quiet, and for some reason that only made you want to laugh more. He must have seen that glint in your eye that he’d grown used to, because he placed his hand over your mouth right before the dam was about to burst.
You squeezed his hand tight as you tried to keep yourself from blowing your cover while Luke occupied himself with actually watching to make sure your path would clear. You were pressed right up against each other, and even through the jacket, even in the cold, you could feel his body warmth. He did say he ran hot.
Eventually, Luke let out a labored sigh and let his hand drop, and you wheezed, nearly doubling over.
“There is something wrong with you,” he said. He was barely able to hold back his own amusement.
“Oh my god,” you breathed, “that was awful.”
“That was your fault!” he exclaimed.
“How was it my fault?” you argued. “You’re the counselor here—you’re meant to be the responsible one!”
“I was being responsible!” Luke laughed again as he ran his hand through his hair then used it to gesture at you. “You were the one that nearly got us caught—you were the one who wanted to be out here in the first place!”
“Right,” you said, pointing your finger, “we gotta get to the beach.”
“Stargazing on the beach,” Luke marveled. “Definitely worth nearly getting eaten.”
“Oh, shut up,” you said as you continued to pull him along. “You could’ve said no.”
He squeezed your hand for a moment. “We both know I can never say no to you.”
Once you got to the beach you let go of his hand and laid down, taking care not to get sand in your sneakers. Luke sat down next to you but stayed up, watching the tide go in and out.
At night, without a hundred campers running around making all the noise they can, you actually felt like you could breathe.
“It’s nice, isn’t it?” It almost felt wrong to break the sacred silence, to insert yourself in the ambiance of nature working together in all its glory.
“Yeah.” Luke’s voice was softer than usual, that rough edge you’d grown used to absent in the face of calmer seas. “Yeah. It’s…”
“Serene,” you suggested.
“Beautiful,” he said. When you glanced at him, he was already looking at you.
“Very smooth,” you said wryly. “Now stop flirting and look at the stars.”
Luke chuckled lightly as he let himself fall back. His hand bumped yours as he adjusted his position, and your breath caught in your throat for the barest moment. You moved it away.
The two of you laid there together in silence gazing at the stars for what felt like forever. The gentle waves coming to shore then leaving, the scattering of sand from quiet winds, and not a single angry car horn or police siren.
You missed home, the city. You were headstrong in your belief that Detroit was better than New York. But gods—sometimes, you just couldn’t beat camp.
You didn’t know what possessed you to break the silence. But something had been tugging at you since the moment you laid down on the beach, and so you did.
“Can I tell you a secret?”
Luke didn’t miss a beat. “Always.”
“I…” you trailed off for a moment, but you bolstered yourself. “I’m scared of what comes next.”
You heard Luke shift in the sand and felt his eyes on you. “What do you mean?”
“After this,” you said. “The honeymoon phase of being a demigod.”
He huffed a laugh. “I wouldn’t say we have a honeymoon phase.”
“You know what I mean.” A shiver went down your spine and you put your arms on your chest. Like a coffin. “I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
“I think you need to stop getting up in the middle of the night,” he said. “It seems you have all your existential crises then.”
You exhaled out your nose, a sorry excuse for a laugh. “I’ve heard about quests—how they can happen for no reason except a god’s will, to— to prove that you’re worthy. And all I can think about is that my mother will never claim me until I prove I’m worthy or die trying.”
Luke was silent. You could feel your throat closing up, the threatened onslaught of tears. You blinked them back.
“All my life, I have never felt seen,” you murmured. “And I’m terrified that the only way I will be seen is when I die.”
“Look at me.”
You turned your head—Luke’s eyes were piercing in the moonlight.
“I don’t care what anyone says, especially that voice in your head—you’re worth everything and more,” he said. “And you are worth so much more than becoming a martyr for a god’s approval.”
“I wish you could tell my mom that,” you mumbled.
“I would march right up to Olympus and say it to her face,” he said. “And if it bothers her that much, she can smite me right now.”
That got a breathy laugh out of you from the pure absurdity. Luke’s eyes flicked to the sky as he waited, and when he didn’t instantly die a horrific death, his gaze went back to you.
“I see you,” Luke promised, his voice low. “And I’ll make everyone see you the way I do. I swear it.”
You were starstruck. You couldn’t look away from him, from the determination etched into each detail of his face, the softness in his eyes directed wholly at you—the fact that he was here at all in the first place at an unholy hour just because you asked.
Oh gods. You were in trouble.
“It’s late.” You finally managed to break the spell that held you under. “We should go.”
“Yeah.” Luke made no motion to move, still focused wholly on you.
“Luke,” you whispered.
You could have sworn his eyes moved down to your lips, but he was sitting up so quickly that you knew you must have imagined it. You cleared your throat as you followed suit, brushing the sand off your—his— jacket.
“This was nice,” he said after a moment. “...Thanks for waking me up.”
“Of course,” you said. “There’s… there’s no one else I would’ve wanted to share it with.”
Luke smiled, and you didn’t think he’d ever looked more beautiful than he did now, awash in the silver moonlight. If you were braver, you would have taken his hand again. You would’ve done what the voice in your head desperately wanted to do—had wanted to do for the past two months.
But you didn’t.
“I guess it was worth nearly getting eaten, huh?”
“Yeah,” he said, and he shrugged. “But most things are worth it when it comes to you.”
You nearly melted right there, and it was a credit to your strength that you didn’t say anything horrifically stupid. Instead, you put on a smile, hoped he couldn’t see how much he was killing you, and started back up on the path.
“C’mon,” you said. “Before we end up having to clean the entire camp for breaking curfew.”
“Whatever you say,” he mused.
-
You groaned as you slumped into your usual spot at the Hermes table. You heard Luke laugh, and you felt his eyes on you as you put your head in your arms.
“What’s got you so down?”
“I’ve been fifteen for three days and I already feel like an old woman,” you said. “Everything still hurts.”
“Capture the flag was meant to be a birthday gift,” Luke said wryly. “And we did win.”
“That doesn’t mean anything,” you grumbled. “I swear, some people went after me on purpose just because it was my birthday. I’ve got bruises all over.”
“You know, we have an infirmary for a reason.”
“They’re battle wounds,” you said. You picked up your head just to take your goblet. “Lemonade. Actually, pink lemonade.” You took a sip, but even that didn’t make you feel better. You buried your head back in your arms with a rough sigh. “Signs of our victory.”
Luke huffed a laugh. “Sometimes I really don’t…”
He trailed off suddenly, and you heard a collective gasp go up at the table.
“What?” you asked halfheartedly.
“You— you’re—”
You didn’t know why he couldn’t finish his sentence. You picked your head up to see Luke’s face awash in golden light, his eyes wide. Everyone else at the Hermes cabin was just as awestruck, and Marisol fumbled around in her purse until she pulled out her compact. She opened her foundation, the mirror pointing at you, and you realized why.
A glowing, golden, translucent sickle with a few sheaths of wheat floated above your head. You frowned.
Before you had the chance to say anything, Luke was yelling your name and tackling you in a hug. You let out a grunt of surprise as you barely managed to brace yourself, and when he pulled away he was smiling wider than you’d ever seen.
“You’re claimed!” he exclaimed, his hands gripping your shoulders. “You— you’re finally claimed!”
“Demeter,” you said, almost absentmindedly. It still hadn’t quite hit you.
“Demeter,” he repeated, nodding rapidly, that gigantic smile seeming like a permanent feature at this point. “I told you everyone would see you— I told you we would make them see you the way I do!”
The rest of the table was chattering away, and you could feel Chris patting you on the back and saying words that went in one ear and out the other. The rest of the pavilion was starting to catch word, and you could see a couple kids from a table on the opposite end standing up and craning to see. Maybe your new siblings.
(You should be happy.)
Your new siblings.
…Your new cabin.
You could still barely think, like there was static in your brain. Luke’s hands on your shoulders were the only thing grounding you.
(You should be ecstatic.)
A year of tears, silent prayers, and apathetic resolution had finally come to a close, just days after your fifteenth.
(Why are you not smiling?)
You’d been claimed. But you didn’t think you’d ever felt more lost.
#also you may notice. that these include the flashbacks mentioned at the end of bleedin me dry. bc i enjoy hurting people#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan fic#luke castellan angst#percy jackson and the olympians x reader#pjo x reader#x reader#sadie writes
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Finally, the last part of my drawings of @indieyuugure's humanized turtles, and this one's a double serving!
Here're Raph and Mikey :)
I managed to carve out some time this evening/night (Finnish time) for more fanart of a fanfic I'm obsessed with.
Part 1, Donnie Part 2, Leo
#mimjan draws#mimjan draws fanart#tmnt 2012#tmnt 2012 fanfic#tmnt 2012 raph#tmnt 2012 mikey#the mutation situation#so... remember how i briefly complained about how i didn't really have a concrete idea of what i wanted for leo?#yeah... so it was kinda even worse for raph.#but it's fine.#similarly; remember how i mentioned percy jackson? also in leo's tags.#mikey's sketch looked EVEN MORE like percy to me than leo when i sketched him.#he still even kind of looks like him in my drawing. but that can also just be me.#i also know raph's tank top technically wasn't low-cut. but i wanted to show his scar so who cares.#we're ignoring my vietnam flashbacks from my 'four swords' manga days i got while drawing raph - manga blue link is seriously just raph fr.
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