#faking it 1x07

[forbescaroline]

235 FAVORITE SHIPS OF ALL TIME (ranked by my followers) 83. amy raudenfeld and karma ashcroft - faking it

[booasaur]

Special Ops: Lioness - 1x07

[loveharlow]

SEVEN - 007

PAIRING ‧₊˚ JJ Maybank x Fem!Reader

SYNOPSIS‧₊˚[9.6k] based on 1x07 and 1x08.

WARNING(S)‧₊˚ swearing, violence, mentions of child abuse, mentions of su*cide, blackmail, breaking and entering, mentions of gun use/murder

NOW PLAYING‧₊˚

A/N‧₊˚ hope y'all are excited for the next chapter as it is the end of season one, cheer or cry, it's up to you. also small heads up, the series masterlist will be updated with some small things that'll help me flow this series better in between seasons.

˗ˏˋ series masterlist ˎˊ˗

“HELL OF A JOB MELTING THIS SHIT DOWN, DR. FRANKENSTEIN.” JJ directed the jab at Kiara, holding the solidified glob of gold in his hands as The Twinkie pulled up to a pawn shop on The Cut.

“Like you could’ve done better.” She retorted, being the first to exit the van as the rest of you followed. 

“I could have.” The blonde boy sassed back. “You’re not the one who has to pawn off this piece of shit. How did I get this job anyway?” He muttered, hiking his backpack up his shoulder and walking off into the corner store. 

“‘Cause you’re the best liar.” Pope chipped in. The bell above the door chimed as the six of you entered, an elderly black woman punching in numbers at the register turning her attention towards you all.

“Afternoon, ma’am.” JJ greeted.

“Afternoon.” She had a bit of sass in her voice, probably suspicious of six teenagers walking into a pawn shop mid-day. 

“I see you buy gold.”

“That’s what the sign say, don’t it?” The shop owner clapped back, a hand on her hip as she pursed her lips. 

“Well, I sure hope you buy a lot of it, ‘cause I’m about to blow your mind.” He told the older woman, swinging the backpack off and practically slamming it down on the counter-top.

“I ain’t got much mind left to blow, so have at it.” She challenged in her southern drawl. JJ pulled the gold from his bag, placing it in front of her. She simply laughed. “That ain’t real. It can’t be.”

“That ain’t real?” JJ raised an eyebrow, leaning against the counter. “Feel how heavy it is.” The woman took him up on his offer, struggling just to lift the melted mess off of the counter. She eyed him and up and down before pulling out a magnifying glass with a light attached, examining the gold further.

“Hm. Spray-painted tungsten.” She claimed confidently. 

“Spray-painted tungsten? Really? Okay.” JJ crossed his arms and stood to his full height. The rest of the pogues wandered around the small shop while you remained next to JJ. “Why don’t you see how soft it is?” The shop owner took a hammer and nail to the block, tapping it with enough force that if it were fake, it would’ve broken easily. “Wow. Would you look at that?” JJ taunted.

“Hold ya horses.” She reprimanded. “We ain’t got to the acid test, yet.” She eyed him, turning around to grab a dropper filled with liquid before returning to her stance in front of the two of you. She let two measly drops of the liquid hit the gold, nothing happening as she did so. “...Well, it ain’t plated, and it ain’t painted.” She muttered to herself. “It looks like somebody tried to melt it down.”

“My mom.” The blonde boy blurted. “She had all this jewelry laying around the house and she thought it was best to melt it down. To, uh, consolidate it.” You turned your head at the idea, struggling to hold in a small laugh. You wondered if JJ ever considered silence as a reply. 

The dark-skinned woman placed the gold down on the scale behind the register, the object clanking as she let it go. “Seven pounds? That’s a lot of earrings.” She told the both of you.

“To be honest, ma’am, it’s really hard to see my mom fall apart with Alzheimer’s.” JJ fake pouted, sniffling as he looked down. You couldn’t help but look around, muttering ‘what the hell’ under your breath. 

“Mhm.” Was all the woman offered in response. “I’ll be right back.” She dismissed herself, heading towards the backroom of the pawn shop. Once she was out of sight, you lightly backhanded JJ’s shoulder.

“Ouch! What was that for?”

“Alzheimer’s? Really?”

“I had to sell it. Shed a couple tears, y’know?” He tried to reason. You simply scoffed, calling the boy ridiculous as the woman returned to her place behind the counter.

“So, I talked to my boss,” she started, shifting awkwardly behind the register. “And this is what I can do.” She slid a piece of paper across the counter, a number written on it. JJ just peered up at her through lidded eyes.

“Fifty-thousand?” He questioned. “You think I walked in here not knowing the spot price? Ma’am, I know for a fact, this is worth one-hundred-forty. At least.” 

“Well, sweetie, you in a pawn shop. This ain’t Zurich.” She told him. 

“...Ninety, or I walk.” He insisted. 

“Seventy. Half price and I don’t ask questions about where you got this.”

JJ chewed the inside of his lip, eyeing the five of you before looking back at the woman. “I’d like that in large denominations, please.”

“Well, the snag is, I don’t have that much denominated, not here anyway. I can write you a cashier’s check.” She offered, hand on her hip. 

“No, ma’am.” JJ declined. “I want the cold hard. That’s what the sign says.” He pointed to the poster in question. “Cash for gold. And that’s what I expect.” 

“...Well, I have to send you to the warehouse. I have the money there. Is that all right?” 

JOHN B HAD THE DIRECTIONS TO THE WAREHOUSE, DRIVING ON A BACK STREET IN THE CUT.  “So, the warehouse is out here?” Pope questioned, voice laced with worry.

“That’s what she said.” JJ said absentmindedly before chuckling to himself. “That’s what she said…”

“Stop.” Pope demanded, rolling his eyes. 

“I’ve never even heard of Resurrection Drive.” Sarah piped up from the passenger seat. 

Suddenly, police sirens blared behind The Twinkie, a car with cop lights directing John B to pull the van over. 

“Why are we getting pulled over?” John B inquired, pulling the van to stop and demanding JJ to stash the gold away. He hid the object under the seat in the back of the van where the remaining four of you sat. You couldn’t see what was happening in the front of the van completely but you swore you heard a gun cock as John B’s head whipped to the left.

“Why don’t I go ahead and see them hands in the air?” A brassy voice came from the driver’s side window and you swore you saw the end of a shotgun barrel just inches away from John B’s face. “All of y’all — hands in the air, now!” The guy commanded, all of your hands getting thrown up. The lower half of his face was covered with a skull-decorated mask but he looked so familiar...

“You get out of the car. Let’s go!” He urged John B, the boy in question slowly exiting the the van from his side. The masked man instructed your friend to let the rest of you out of the vehicle, following his every move with the end of the gun. John B slid the side door open, never taking his eyes off of the guy.

He yelled at all of you lay down in the ditch, basically shoving the fire arm in your faces as you all practically fell to the ground out of fear. The man backed away, telling you all to keep your heads down as he edged toward the van, jumping inside and beginning to rummage inside of it.

“That bitch set us up.” You sighed quietly, voice shaking from fear. There was no damn warehouse and Resurrection Drive didn’t exist. 

“That old bat shanked us.” JJ said frustratedly. “Fuck!” He slammed his fist on the ground, right next to your head. You heard Sarah whimpering, the sound prompting to look to the side where you saw John B getting up from his crouched position.

You frantically waved one of your hands, trying to get him to lay back down. He simply put his fingers up to his lips, signaling you to ‘sh’ before booking it towards the blue sports car with red and blue lights still flashing in the window. 

Just then, the guy hopped out of the van. You bit your lip out of anger when you eyed the gold clutched in his palm. He pointed at all of you still on the ground, not noticing John B’s absence. “Don’t move. Unless you want your goddamn brains blown all over the dirt, don’t move your fuckin’ heads!” Was the last thing he said before jumping back into his own vehicle where John B must’ve been hiding.

The five of you shot up when the sports car started to shake, some kind of altercation happening between the two guys. 

“Guys, I got the gun!” JB shouted from inside the car, the rest of you rushing over with JJ at the forefront of the group. Pope grabbed the gold from the passenger seat, announcing his victory as the rest of you jumped the criminal. You managed a nasty kick to his chin after Kie got him on the ground, rendering him incapable as Sarah slammed the open car door against his head.

JJ gripped him by his shirt and sat his limp, breathless frame against his own car and you all circled around him. He didn’t waste time in snatching the mask down, revealing the thief’s identity.

“Barry?” You blurted out before you could think about your surroundings, all heads turning to you. 

“Hey, Snoozie.” He dragged out breathlessly on the ground, gold grills glinting in the sun.

“You know this guy?” JJ asked, pure confusion in his eyes.

You stuttered to find a response that wouldn’t raise more questions. “I’ve... seen him around before…”

“He’s a basehead. Sells coke to my dad.” JJ’s mind left the topic alone in his rage.

“Probably knows my brother...” Sarah muttered. Barry tried to plead, saying he wasn’t gonna hurt any one of you but JJ was quick to shut him up with the butt of his own gun, hitting him in the face with it. 

“JJ!” You all called out but he just pushed you all off of him, bending down to rummage the drugs dealer’s pockets and pulling out his wallet. He removed his ID, looking back and forth between the piece of plastic and it’s owner on the ground. 

“We got one last stop.” He affirmed, stomping off towards the van. “Let’s go see where this son of a bitch lives.”

“I DON’T KNOW ABOUT THIS, MAN.” Pope voiced his worries from his seat in the van. JJ was driving, taking the group of you straight into ‘Crackhead Wasteland’ as Sarah called it. Pulling up in front of Barry’s trailer was something you never thought you’d be doing with the Pogues. Or at all, anymore.

The angry blonde didn’t say a word as he threw the driver’s side door open and got out, heading straight inside the trailer without looking back.

“Somebody should probably go-”

“I’ll do it.” You cut off Kiara, climbing over her and Pope to get out of the van, following JJ’s path. Entering the trailer, it smelled stale and it was so messy you could barely see the floor. Your eyes found JJ, scouring the cabinets and drawers and any place where you could store something — borderline ransacking the place.

“JJ, what are you doing?” You sighed, throwing your hands out as you made no moves to stop the blonde.

“Thou hath stealeth from us, we shall stealeth from ye.” You just scoffed, stepping towards him while he threw pillows around. “An eye for an eye, princess.”

“And then what? ‘Cause you know Barry isn’t going to just let this go. You can’t just a rob a drug dealer, JJ, he knows who we are!”

“And why is that exactly?” He stopped in his haste, approaching you with quickness, combats boots dragging across the floor. The blonde was inches, centimeters, away from you now — your noses almost brushing as he stared down at you. “I’m starting to realize that you have some secrets that you don’t want us to know about.”

“This isn't about me-”

“First, it’s the Sarah drama. Then it’s Rafe acting like he knows you and now? Now, you got a south-side drug dealer callin’ you nicknames like he has you written down in his book.” He listed. “I’m starting to think that we don’t really know you at all.” That statement hit you hard, almost physically recoiling at how bad it hurt your heart.

You didn’t even think JJ noticed half of those things, or were bothered by them. The last thing you wanted was for your friends to see you as some kind of liar. “I’m not scared of this guy.” He told you, making his way towards the back rooms as you leaned your forehead against the wall, knowing you weren’t gonna be able to stop him from whatever he’d set his mind to.

The boy retreated from the room, small duffel bag in hand and stomped right past you and out of the trailer. You eventually pushed yourself off of the wall, following him out of the house.

“Alright, so we’re looking at five-grand each as reparations for putting us through that bullshit.” He counted out bills in his hands as your feet touched the grass behind him, the remaining four of the group looking at him bewildered while you just stared irritatedly at his back with your arms crossed.

“So, that’s what we’re doing now? Robbing drug dealers?”

“This Barry guy’s going to find out.” Sarah told him. “And he’s gonna come after us.”

“Yes, he will.” Pope backed up the blonde girl. “This is not the time to start wildin’ out.” 

“How’d you guys like having a gun pulled on you?” JJ semi-shouted, John B stepping into his bubble.

“Relax.”

“He had it right here on you, bro.” JJ continued ranting, pressing his finger into John B’s forehead. 

“We’ve gotta go get the rest of the gold, okay?” John B reached for the duffel bag. “Just give me that shit, we’re putting it back-” The Routledge boy was cut off when JJ abruptly shoved him against the exterior of The Twinkie. He looked at his best friend, appalled for a moment. “You feel like a tough guy? What’re you gonna do when he comes for us?”

JJ put down the arm that was holding John B against the van before grabbing his backpack and hiking it up his shoulder. “I’m not putting it back.” He said with conviction in his tone before getting into the van, none of you following him inside. “You guys gettin’ in or what?”

When nobody moved, he looked around at all of you silently, meeting each of your eyes before throwing himself back out of the vehicle. He stood before the five of you now, shrugging his shoulders. “What?”

“We’re sick of your shit.” John B told the blonde, stepping up to him once again.

“Oh, my shit?”

“Yeah, your pulling guns on people shit.” Kiara backed up JB. 

“You acting like a maniac-” Pope tried before he was cut off.

“Okay…Pope, I took the fall for you, man!” JJ tried to get through to him. “You know how much money I owe ‘cause of you?”

“I’m gonna pay you back and I didn’t even ask you to do that!”

“I just did pay it back!” JJ screamed at the boy. “Right here, right now, by myself.”

“JJ,” You spoke up for the first time in the last couple of minutes. “My mom has the restitution handled, okay? We’re not blaming you, alright?. But we're already in deep shit.” You tried gently, not wanting to upset the blonde more than he was already. “Just put it back, J.”

He simply bit his lip and shook his head, not meeting any of your eyes. “Nah, don’t worry about it. I’ll handle it.” He spoke, grabbing his belongings out of the van. “You can tell mommy to keep her money.” Was all he said before turning his backs to all of you, walking off.

You sighed, taking wide steps in his direction. “JJ, come on-” You tried before you were being held back by John B.

 “Just… let him go.”

You huffed, turning around to look at your group of friends. “Did you guys really have to say all of that?”

Looks of offense and confusion spread across their faces. “Are you seriously blaming us?” Kiara questioned your judgment.

“I’m not blaming anyone but you all just jumped on him as if we haven’t been in this together.” You clarified, eyes on Pope. “You may not have asked him to take the fall but he did it anyway.” Your eyes drifted towards Kie. "The gun is only an issue for you until you think we need it." Then you were looking at John B. “He’s been doing all of this for you. We all have.” You reprimanded finally.

“...JJ isn’t the most level-headed person but he’s not the root of our problems, either.” Was the last thing you told the remaining four of the group before getting into the van.

“I CAN FIGURE IT OUT TONIGHT, GET IT DONE, AND WE CAN GO BACK TO THE HOUSE TOMORROW MORNING.” Pope explained his plan to retrieve the rest of the gold. The boy thought it was best to get the rest of it and store it somewhere secure until you all could find someone who wouldn’t rip you off considering what happened this morning. You’d all gathered at The Wreck, sans JJ, who no one had heard from since he went off on his own a couple hours prior.

“All right, let’s do it.” John B slapped his thighs, ready to stand before Sarah spoke. 

“What about that thing with my dad?”

Pope paused, looking between the couple and craning his neck forward. “What thing?”

“I…have to go fishing with Ward.” You couldn't help but chuckle from your place against the wall, the sound coming out as more of a snort as John B shot you a side-eye.

“You’re giving up four-hundred mil’ to go kill fish?” Kiara asked unbelievably. 

“Blow it off. It’s four-hundred million in gold!” Pope tried to reason.

“Look, I have to, okay?” John B said finally. “He saved me. If it weren’t for Ward, I’d be in foster care. So, I have to go. Plus, it’d be better to go after the gold at night, anyway.” The empty restaurant went silent, all of you letting the topic go. You simply pushed yourself off of the wall.

“Well, while you have father-son time with Ward Cameron, I’m gonna go track down our friend.” 

AFTER SEARCHING FOR JJ FOR HOURS WITH NO LUCK, you returned to The Chateau as night fell. You hadn’t heard from John B and Sarah in hours but had texted Pope and Kie to meet up. You had to return home, begrudgingly, considering your own car had been sitting there for weeks now, collecting dust, and you needed it to make the search for JJ easier.

Pulling up, wheels crunching on gravel as you did, you parked and cut the engine just as Kie and Pope pulled up next to you in his dad’s truck. He was the first to speak as all three of you got out of your seats.

“I didn’t know you still had that thing.” He told you, eyeing the Boxwood Green Ford Bronco. 

“I don’t drive it often, especially since we’ve all been riding around in the van as of recently.”

“Isn’t it-”

“My dad’s old truck, yeah. It needs some TLC before I can drive it for real. I got passed by a family of squirrels on my way over here...” You breathed out, eliciting small laughs from the duo.

“...Any luck finding JJ?” Kiara asked you. You shook your head despondently, shrugging your shoulders as your smile fell.

“I checked everywhere except his house. I figured if he did stop there, it couldn’t have been for long. But he’ll turn up, I guess...” You spoke softly, disappointment lacing your tone as you fiddled with your nails. “He always does.”

Suddenly, the greenery surrounding The Chateau was lit up with fairly lights, all of your eyes scanning the twinkling objects with confusion. 

“What the hell…” Pope muttered. You all gave each other cautious looks before following the lit path up to the backyard where the boy you’d been searching the island up and down for was sat in a hot-tub surrounded by champagne glasses, inflatables, and flamingo LED posts. 

“JJ?” You asked, perplexity lacing your tone as you eyed the inflatable birds in the water. 

“What did you do?” Pope was quick to ask. 

“I got a jet going straight up my butt right now.” He ignored both of your questions. “Y’all should get in immediately. The water’s amazing.” He advised, pouring himself a glass of champagne and cheering with himself before downing it.

“Where have you been?”

“How much did this cost?” Kiara overshadowed your initial question. 

“Uh… pretty much all of it.” 

“All of it?” Pope was beyond appalled. He looked like he would blow any second. “You spent all the money in one day?”

“What? Can’t a man have a little luxury in life?” JJ threw out, slurring his words mildly. “I mean, like, guys — we only live once, right? ” 

“Are you kidding me?” Pope yelled. “You could have helped us buy supplies to get the rest of the gold out of the well!”

“Or literally given it to any charity!” Kiara backed up while you just stared at the blonde as he got visibly more and more agitated as his friends tore into him. You felt just as bad as when they did it earlier but you couldn’t argue that it wasn’t more justified this time. That fact didn’t make your heart ache any less for your friend. Your best friend.

“Okay, well you know what? I didn’t do that!” JJ shouted, now standing in the hot-tub. His bare chest on display for you all to see the big patches of bruises that littered his skin. You felt your jaw drop so fast, eyes laser-focused on the injuries. “I got a hot tub. For my friends.” He continued as your eyes, that wouldn’t leave his torso, filled with tears.

They were so purple, so vivid, so huge. And you knew only person could’ve given JJ Maybank fresh bruises so quickly.

“No, you know what? Screw friends. I got a hot tub for my family.” He cried. “I got this for you,” He spoke as his eyes shifted in your direction and stayed there, watching as your own drifted slowly from his bruised body to his teary, blue eyes. “Look what I did for you! Look at this!” His voice was watery as he pleaded.

You forced your lips back together, suppressing the sob you could feel building in your chest as one lonely, burning tear ran from your eye. You didn’t waste a second in walking forward and stepping into the hot tub, standing right in front of the distressed blonde. His eyes were on you now and you could see everything behind them that you couldn’t from just five feet away.

You may have given the boy whiplash with the way your arms wound around his neck and pulled him down into the tightest hug in the world in the less than a millisecond, the action so fast it made the water splash around you both as he stabilized himself.

There was a pause before his own arms encircled your waist, so tight you could barely breathe but you didn’t care. You could hear his sobs in your ear, feel his tears trailing down your neck and you basically cradled him.

“I’m so sorry.” You cooed, one of your hands now soothing his hair down. 

“I was gonna kill him…” The blonde wept into the crook of your neck. You couldn’t control the tears that fell from your eyes at that, leaning your head so that it was slightly on top of his as you chewed the inside of your bottom lip to control your own sobs.

“I won’t let anything happen to you ever again. I promise you that.”

THE MORNING AFTER WHAT HAPPENED WITH JJ, you’d spent the night with him at The Chateau, Kie and Pope being summoned back to their homes. You figured it was about time to return home as well, at least to feed Marley and what not. Lightly shaking JJ’s shoulder, who was in a deep sleep next to you on the guest room bed, the blonde groaned before stretching, almost punching you in the face as he did so.

Informing him of your plans to head home and come back, he assured you that he’d be fine and that he needed to shower anyway. With that green light, you got out of the bed and slipped your shoes on before leaning down to give his sleeping figure a half-hug and a hair-shuffle. You shouted that you’d be back as you slipped out into the backyard, heading for your parked car. 

The drive back home wasn’t long but it was awfully dreaded. Between the hunt for gold and the constant discourse between you and your mother, it seemed as if a break was never in the cards for you.

The sun had come up not to long ago, reaching its peak in the sky as you pulled into your Figure Eight driveway, casting a orange hue over the Cul de sac. You immediately took note of your mother’s car parked in the driveway as well, internally groaning as you did.

Walking up to the front door, you could immediately hear the faint sound of your mother yelling from inside the house. Your hand hovered above the door knob for a moment, listening to her muffled protests until you snapped out of it and entered the house quietly, careful to close the door slowly behind you.

You could tell her voice was coming from upstairs, most likely her bedroom on the upper floor all the way at the end of the hall. 

“You’re going to screw us!” She yelled as you edged your way up the stairs, careful not to make the wood creak or wake Marley’s sleeping figure on the couch, where she wasn’t really allowed to be. You stood at the top of the steps now, eyeing her bedroom door from feet away that was cracked open. “Oh, your plan? What exactly is your goddamn plan, Ward?”

Ward? Why would your mother be on the phone with Ward, screaming at him in the early hours of the morning? You crept closer and closer to the door until you were at least a good ten feet away, just enough to hear her clearly. 

“Peterkin and Shoupe already found Big John’s glasses on that damn island, it’s only a matter of time. And you taking a dead man’s son out to fish is not a good plan!” She mocked angrily, shuffling around her room. The unpredictable slam of objects causing you to flinch and press yourself against the wall, heart pounding in your chest as you continued to eavesdrop.

“That boy won’t tell you a damn thing about the gold. I risked my career to cover up what you did and now you’re going to screw us both over because you’re getting greedy. And I refuse to go down with you. I have everything I need to put you behind bars, don’t you forget that.” What the hell was she talking about? Your mind was running a mile minute trying to put the pieces together, if they’re even were any. “I will get in my car right now and take those files down to Peterkin if need be. Do not fuck with me, Cameron.”

Whatever was going on sounded too sinister to be any good. Your mother and Ward Cameron were the world’s most unlikely duo and you were sure that the nature of their discussion wasn’t property development or criminal justice. And by the sounds of it, they were talking about Big John and John B.

And if John B was staying at Tannyhill and Ward, as well as your mother, knew about the gold, then everything just took a very wrong, dark turn. Suddenly, something in your gut shifted and you had to get out of the house. Now. You descended the steps as quickly and quietly as possible, pausing when you got to the bottom of the steps.

“...I have everything I need to put you behind bars…I will get in my car right now and take those files down to Peterkin…”

...Files. If you wanted to know anything about whatever your mom knew, it had to be in whatever files she had that allegedly had the capability to take down a neighborhood king such as Ward Cameron himself.

But she didn’t keep work stuff at the house.

It was all at her law office. 

Whipping your head side to side, scanning the kitchen-slash-living area, your eyes landed on the table next to the front door where her purse stood next to the bowl where she would drop her keys. Rushing over to it, you leaned over it, relief filling you when your guess was confirmed, the keys to her office sitting lonely in the bowl. You snatched up the keychain, looking back at your sleeping dog before exiting the house and practically sprinting towards your car.

YOUR CAR SKIRTED TO A STOP OUTSIDE OF THE OFFICE, killing the engine as you practically flew out of the driver’s seat and up the short steps that led up to the front door of ‘R.R. Law Firm’. The keys rattled as you shoved them into the keyhole, letting yourself into the workspace. You power walked through the waiting area, making a b-line for your mother’s main office.

The door was closed, her name printed in big, gold letters across the frosted window. You knew this had to be an in-and-out operation, considering the office opened in the next couple of hours and your mother had a knack for showing up early.

Walking into her office, you didn’t know where to start. The wooden desk, the drawers, the cabinets, her desktop. On a whim, you immediately went for the computer in the center of the desk, waking it up as you were immediately greeted with a password screen.

You smacked your teeth, taking a guess — her birthday? Wrong. Your birthday? Wrong. Her wedding date? Wrong. You decided to give up, knowing you didn’t have the time to play guessing games and potentially miss anything that could tell you what the hell has been going on under your nose for who knows how long.

You spotted a file cabinet in the corner of the office, unlike the others. It had key holes for each cabinet. Looking down at the stolen keys in your hand, there were only three on the metal ring — her house key, the office key, a smaller key that you hadn’t taken notice of before.

Pinching the silver object between your fingers, you walked up to the tall cabinet, sticking it in the highest drawer and twisting before pulling the receptacle open. But it was empty. And so was the next drawer. Your eyebrows pinched together, why have a locked cabinet with nothing to hide away?

So, with a passing thought, you skipped the third and fourth drawers, aiming straight for the fifth and last drawer, inserting the key and pulling it open. Almost struggling to do so with how full it was. Of course it’d be hidden in the very last drawer of a locked cabinet — hide and hide again.

It was folders on top of folders but one thing caught your eye — a manila folder with the word ‘POGUES’ written across it in bold, black letters. It was the first thing you reached for, despite it being smushed under other files and hard to get out. Once you had it between both of you hands, free from the cabinet, you just stared at it before sitting down on the floor.

Flipping it open, you felt your heart drop as your face twisted.

There were pictures. Of you and your friends that you didn’t know had been taken. Photos of you all boarding the boat the day before you found the Royal Merchant out in the storm, the photo of you and Pope sinking Topper’s boat, of you all gathered at The Wreck. Someone had been following you all for days, weeks. But why?

You soon had your answer when you went further into the photos, uncovering others underneath — a picture of Big John’s compass, photocopies of the maps you’d found and a picture of you all gathered outside of the Crain house, a note written on it. ‘They found it?’ was all it read. More importantly, you recognized pictures of pages out of your journal, pages that detailed the events of your gold hunt. Journals you always kept in your room.

You didn’t even take notice of the tears welling in your eyes until one dropped onto the pictures laid out on the hardwood floors. You quickly wiped the tears away, shuffling all of the photos back into the safety of the folder and going back into the storage bin to retrieve the next thing that caught your eye — a folded up piece of paper tucked into the corner. Unfolding the paper, you were immediately perplexed.

It was a list of payments. A bank statement. A log keeping track of monthly payments made out to R.R. from W.C. and it didn’t take a genius to put two and two together — your mother was keeping track of payments that she’d been receiving from Ward for eight months straight.

Just weeks after your dad was found. 

There was an initial payment of five-hundred thousand dollars and then monthly deposits of fifty-thousand dollars from seven months ago up until the beginning of…this month. Something about it made you want to throw up. Ward Cameron had been paying your mother large sums of money ever since your dad passed and nothing about that sat right with you.

Going into to the drawer you pulled out the last two items remaining — two FedEx Packages individually labeled B.J. and O.C.. You made moves to open the B.J. labeled package first with it being the lighter of the two, the other package nearly bursting at the seam.

There was only one thing inside. An cassette tape, labeled Big John. Your hands shook. You had no idea what could possibly be on this tape or why your mother would have anything about Big John stashed in her office. She wasn’t involved in his case, so what the hell was recorded on this tape that she had to hide it away. And using the little bit of brain power you had left, you figured if B.J. stood for Big John, then O.C. could only represent one thing.

A name. Owen Carter. Your father. And suddenly, opening that second package became less appealing and you needed to get the pogues together to piece this all together. Because you had a very bad feeling that this gold wasn’t as off the radar as you all had initially assumed. And maybe those square groupers weren’t the only ones after it.

Or willing to kill for it.

“What’re you doing in here?” Your eyes shot up from you place on the floor, landing on your mother’s figure standing next to the open office door. When did she get here? Her own eyes drifted to the documents laid out in front of your frame sat on the floor, and then to the open cabinet.

You could hear your heart in your ears, your hands braced behind you. The first thing your mind told you to do was run but for some reason, you went against all caution. Snatching up the document that’d been pressing in your mind since you read it, you questioned her. “What is this?” You asked, slowly standing up and presenting the bank statement to her. You wouldn’t dare step closer.

You didn’t feel safe. 

“Why were you going through my things-”

“Just answer the question.” You demanded, shaking the paper. “You’ve been getting money from Ward Cameron ever since my dad died. I want to know why.”

“Ward is... he's a donor for the law firm-”

“Don’t lie to me.” You cut off the woman as she started to take steps towards you. “These were made out to you. To your personal bank account, not the firm.” You informed. “I have a right to know.”

“There are things you don’t understand. Just put all that stuff back, it’s work related-”

“Stop lying to me!” You broke down, throwing the paper to the floor. “You have pictures of me and my friends, recent pictures. You have information on the Royal Merchant, the payments from Ward, and information on Big John and my dad.” You listed off, tears streaming as you snatched up the cassette tape. “What’s on here? Huh?” You held the object between your fingers, watching her eyes go wide. 

“Put that down.”

“What’s on it?” You pressed, an expression of pure anger spreading across your mother’s face that you’d never seen before. “And the other package?” You motioned for the parcel that you’d had yet to open. “What’s in there? What are you hiding-”

“Do you ever think that I don’t have to tell you everything?!” Your mother snapped. “I am the adult here. What I do is none of your goddamn concern. So, when I tell you to put that stuff back,” She trailed, taking quick steps towards you until she was just inches away. “You put it back. Give that to me.” She spat before reaching for the tape in your hands, but you threw your arms out of her reach.

“No! Stop!” You screamed as the woman gripped your arms. “Let go of me!”

“Give me the damn tape, Y/n!”

The dispute went on for a few moments until you took the opportunity to push her away from you, her cell phone falling from her pocket as she stumbled back. A message coming through just as the device hit the floor, screen side up.

W.C.

The kid got away. He knows. 

You both looked at the message, then back at each other. That’s when you knew. Your mother knew a lot more than she ever let on and she wasn’t the only one. If she knew about the gold then there was no doubt that Ward knew, but the compass. If she had photos of the compass, and John B gave it to Peterkin, then that was one more person on the list of people not to trust.

And now, by the looks of that message, John B found out something and he could be in just as much danger as you. You immediately turned to grab the files, you couldn’t leave them. You had to take everything. No matter what.

Your mother practically tackled you to the floor from behind, dragging you both down onto the hardwood. Your chin thumped against the wood, causing you to bite down on your lip, yelling out in pain. You managed to flip onto your back underneath the woman she attempted to pin your swinging arms.

“Get the hell off of me!”

“I can’t let you leave!” She hollered in your face, one of your hands successfully grabbing a hold of her hair and using it to yank your mother off of you, rolling onto your stomach to push yourself up. You went for the papers again, only to be grabbed once more by the back of your neck. You screamed out in pain as her fingers dug into the back of your neck.

You managed to kick her in the kneecap, causing the woman to fold in pain as you attempted to create distance. Failing to do so, however, as she quickly recovered and slapped you across the face, so hard, you were sure that the rings on her fingers left a series of scratch marks across your cheek.

In your stunned state, she took the opportunity to pin you against the wall with her forearm pressing painfully up against your throat, cutting off most of your air supply. “You can’t tell anyone. Do you hear me?” She sneered, her face inches from yours. “Why couldn’t you just leave it alone?” Her words were jumbling together in your ears, the only clear sound being a ringing noise.

Was your own mother really so lost in her own rage that she’d kill you to keep whatever happened a secret?

You were losing air by the second, your vision going blurry and cross-eyed. Fight-or-flight kicking in your, you used whatever strength you could muster to bring one hand up enough to claw viciously at her eye, your mother crying out in agony as she released you to hold her eye. You took in a big gasp of air and used your foot to kick her down as hard as possible while she now clutched her abdomen with one hand and held her eye with the other.

Wasting little time, you bolted towards the documents and gathered them all in your arms before making a b-line to the front door and out of the office. You almost tripped down the steps trying to make it to your car. Throwing the pile of papers and parcels into the passenger seat, you threw yourself into the driver’s seat and sped off, leaving a cloud of smoke behind you.

YOUR TRUCK KICKED UP DUST AS YOU PULLED INTO THE FRONT YARD OF THE CHATEAU, JJ, Pope, and Kie already standing starstruck outside. “Where’s John B?” You asked breathlessly, frantically, as they all turned their looks of shock to you. JJ was the first speak, taking steps towards you.

“What the hell happened to your face?” He questioned, eyes on your busted lip and the claw marks decorating your cheek. 

“Where’s John B?” You ignored the blonde in your hectic state, breathing heavily and eyes roaming.

“He just left...” Pope told you. 

“He said something about Ward knowing about the gold.” Kiara cut in. “...He thinks that Ward killed his dad.” You sighed, looking down at the items clutched in your arms, the pogues noticing them now, too. “What is all that?”

“We’re about to find out.” You told them. “Where’s the tape player we found in the tomb?”

“SO, YOU STOLE ALL OF THIS FROM YOUR MOM’S OFFICE? AND SHE’S THE ONE WHO SCRATCHED UP YOUR FACE LIKE THAT?” JJ questioned as you splayed the stolen documents out on the coffee table inside The Chateau. 

“Yes,” You spoke, opening the tape player and inserting the cassette. “I heard her talking to Ward on the phone and, I don't know, something didn’t feel right, she was threatening him with information she had, so I broke into her law office.” You explained as they all crowded around your sitting figure on the couch. “She had pictures of us, pictures of my journal pages, of the Royal Merchant research we found…I think she had something to do with what happened to John B’s dad.” You told them solemnly. “And mine.”

“I thought they ruled your dad’s death as…” Pope started, looking for the words to approach the sensitive topic. “As a suicide.”

You sighed. “They did but I never believed that. He wasn’t depressed or anything, or at least there were no signs. I know him, if it were true he would’ve left a note or something. A man as happy as my father doesn’t slit his wrists and walk into the ocean without saying goodbye. But I didn’t want to believe that the truth was any darker than that, honestly. So, I accepted what I was told.”

“What do you think the tape will prove?” Kiara piped up, leaning against the couch. You simply shrugged.

“I don’t know. But better to know than be left in the dark, right?” You concluded before pressing play on the tape record, the cassette whirling inside before a voice came through. It was Ward’s.

“Why am I doing this again?”

“You want my help?” Your mother’s voice replied, digital and static-like. “This is collateral. I help you cover up what you did and this is insurance that you won’t screw me over in the end. If I go down, so do you.” She said. “Start from the beginning, don’t leave anything out. What happened the day you killed Big John Routledge?” 

You could Ward’s sigh before his voice came through once more. 

“...It was a mistake, a stupid accident. It was that morning before he was pronounced missing, Owen, Big John and I were out on the water.” He explained, your heart racing. You weren’t aware that your dad was working with Ward. Or even knew him outside of a general context. “Big John, he brought us out there to talk. He told us that he’d found it, he’d found the gold. We were happy but he was focused on other things, said he need assurances. Legal assurances. I tried to tell him that we were all partners, that it would be split evenly. But he didn’t like that…”

He continued. “...He said he never agreed to it. He felt like the twenty-years he’d spent looking for the gold entitled him to a bigger share than Owen and I. He wanted to give Owen and I ten percent each, twenty percent total while he took eighty. I couldn’t do it. I tried to tell him that I’d supplied the boats and money and that Owen got the diving equipment, we both tried to tell him that it wasn’t fair. But things got heated, spiraled out of control. He grabbed me, I hit him, and Owen tried to break it up but we didn’t care. Big John, he tripped. I pushed him back and he tripped over a loose piece in the boat floor and hit his head on the edge…”

“...He started bleeding everywhere. It wouldn’t stop. I tried to console him, to fix what I’d done. But Owen was freaking out and Big John was losing consciousness. And Owen, God, he tried to call someone on the radio but I wouldn’t let him. I was scared. He kept saying we needed call someone, over and over but I ignored him and… I decided to throw Big John overboard. I thought he was dead. Owen… he was spiraling. He started calling me a monster, saying that Big John was our friend. I tried to calm him down and get on the same page but it was impossible. And when he and I got into it, he managed to get away on the emergency lifeboat we’d taken with us. Do you want me to tell you what happened to Owen?”

“No,” Your mother’s voice broke through after Ward’s monologue. “That will be recorded separately. For now, I just need to know if you’ve told anyone else, any of this, besides me.”

“Yes. Scooter Grubbs. He knows everything. I enlisted him as my new partner after what happened.”

“And what happened to Big John’s boat?”

“I sunk it. I didn’t want anyone to find it.”

“...That’s all I need for now. End of Confession Tape One.”

…The room was silent for a while, all four of you taking in the heap of information at once. Kiara was the first to break the silence, voice full of sad rage. “So, Ward actually killed John B’s dad.”

“This is so fucked.” Pope huffed, one hand on his head.

“What did she mean by tape one? Are there other tapes?” JJ spoke up, eyes on you before his next question left his lips. “Are you okay?”

You were biting your lip, holding back tears as you shook your head side to side slowly, your watery eyes meeting his. “No. I’m not.” None of them knew how to react, Kiara giving you a side hug while JJ and Pope sat in silence. 

“...Should we open the other one?” Pope questioned after a moment of silence, referring to the parcel with your father’s initial on it. But you weren’t ready for that. You would open it eventually. You had to. But you had all the information to help John B right now. So, that was the goal.

You shook your head, wiping your palms against your thighs. “No. Not right now.”

“Don’t you want to know what happened to your dad? Who was involved?”

“I’m pretty sure we have those bases covered, Pope.” You laughed out sadly. “The only thing that package could have is the gorey details that I didn’t know. If, and when, I open that, I won’t be any use to you all, no matter how bad it is. Or isn’t. I’m just…not ready.” 

THE THREE POGUES LEFT YOU ALONE AT THE CHATEAU, they figured it was good to keep an eye on Ward. They advised you to hang back, rest a little. But sleep wasn’t coming easy to you. You figured John B would return at some point from wherever he went. It was the early hours of the morning, close to one, when you heard the door slam shut, his voice echoing around the house.

“Pope? Kie?” He called out in the dark of the shack, you sat up from where you were laid out on the guest bed. Coming out of the room, you leaned tiredly against the door frame..

“They’ve gone Ward-watching.” You yawned, crossing your arms.

He smiled smally at your presence before basically charging towards you and sweeping you into a bear hug. “You have no idea how much I needed to see you.” He mumbled into your hair as your face was buried into his chest. When he pulled back, his hands were on your shoulders as he stared into your eyes, his smile dropping. “I have to tell you about Ward. He tried to kill me, Y/n. And I went to see Ms. Lana, she told me-”

“I know.” You cut him off. “I know everything. About Ward and the gold…about your dad. My mom is involved somehow, she had all this stuff in her office. She documented everything…” You explained, eye drifting to where the heap of evidence laid on the coffee table still.

“...What about your dad?” His hands dropped from your shoulders. “The story I got from Lana, she said that when Ward left, he said he had loose ends to tie up. She said Scooter was positive he was talking about your dad.” Your eyes were focused on the last unopened package as John B spoke.

“I’m pretty sure I can find that out but I don’t want to. Not now.” You spoke, tone firm. You didn’t have many more tears left to cry. Turning your sights back to JB, you continued. “Right now, we get some sleep and get the gold out of the well first thing in the morning. We can deal with everything else later. We can’t let him win, John B.”

WHEN YOU WOKE UP THE NEXT DAY, John B was gone. You had no clue where he went until he came back hours later, saying we needed to get everyone together, excluding Pope who had his scholarship interview today. When the missing two arrived at The Chateau, meeting you and John B on the pier behind the shack, he explained everything.

The gold was gone. When he’d woken that morning, he rushed to The Crain House, the estate littered with ‘for sale’ signs and Cameron Development construction equipment. He’d managed to get into the well himself, only to discover that the gold was gone. Every trace of it. Ward Cameron had the gold and no one knew where he or it was.

“You’re sure he got everything?” Kie questioned once he was done as she sat next to John B, who was splayed out on the wood. 

“Every bar.” He sighed despondently, snatching the cast off of his arm after minutes of fiddling with it. “Look, it’s not like I expected a happy ending or some shit.”

Suddenly, Pope came running down the landing, dressed down in his professional attire. “Guys!” He stopped in the middle of the four of you, hands on his knees and a sweat stain in the middle of his powder blue button up. “Oh, God. I ran all the way down here.”

“You all right?”

“How was the interview, Pope?”

“Don’t ask.” He panted, standing up straight. “JB, Look dude, I’m sorry. About everything.”

“It’s fine–”

Pope cut him off. “But I don’t have a lot time but I have information that is tactically relevant.” He started, looking around at all of you. “So, before I had my interview, my dad said he was going down to the private airstrip to cut palms for Cameron’s big plane.” All of you perked up at this, John B showing the most expression he had in hours. “Because it was too heavy, it needed a longer landing strip to take off. So, I’m there sitting in my interview thinking to myself, hm, why would Cameron need a longer airstrip to take off?” He spoke enthusiastically, hands moving every which way as he paced the dock.

“What could be so heavy to weigh it down?”

“...Gold.” JJ realized, staring down at John B.

“Exactly.” Pope pointed excitedly. “Guys, this is our chance, but it leaves tonight, and we have to go.”

“Guys, we can’t give up now.” Kiara smiled.

“What’s the plan, big man?” JJ asked, leaning against the wooden pillar holding up the structure. But John B was looking at you.

“We’re gonna steal that shit back.” He half-smiled, sitting up now. “He doesn’t get to win.”

PARKING THE VAN BEHIND THE WIRE FENCE THAT ENCLOSED THE AIRSTRIP, you all ran towards it, grabbing a hold of the gate. Pope had a pair of binoculars, using them to get a better view of the interactions taking place. 

“They’re loading up the gold.” He informed before JB snatched the binoculars away, using them for himself. Without the optical assistance, you could still get a vague view of what was happening through the trees, watching as a familiar blue Range Rover pulled up.

“There’s Ward.” John B said. Two people exited the car, John B’s face falling as they did so.

“What?” Kiara asked, noting his solemn expression. “John B, what?”

“...It’s Sarah.”

“She’s with him?” Pope whispered as if anyone could really hear the five of you. 

You all continued observing, watching Sarah pace up and down the airstrip, approaching the workers who loaded the gold. Even from your distance, she looked frantic. Worried. Then Ward was grabbing her by the arm walking her to the plane but she resisted. 

Within seconds, her father had picked her up by the waist and basically dragged her into the plane, her screams echoing throughout the open space. 

“He’s hurting her.” John B said aloud before rushing towards the van, hopping in and starting the engine, catching all of your attention. 

“Hey. What’re you doing?” Pope asked, throwing his hands up while John B reversed the van. You all started yelling and running towards the van but he started driving before you could pile in. Then it became clear when he drove the The Twinkie, straight and clean, through the wire fence and onto the airstrip, heading straight for the plane.

You all yelled after him, running thorough the break he’d made in the fence before deciding collectively to not assume you could catch up to motor vehicle in time to stop him. All the four of you could do was watch as the plane propeller’s whirled, the aircraft making a u-turn to face the correct direction of the landing strip.

John B’s van came up right beside, keeping speed with the larger vehicle. It wasn’t long before the smaller of the two was in front, John B driving the van right in front of the plane now. He brought it to a stop, parking it sideways in front of the oncoming aircraft.

You really thought that it was over. Your heart dropping in a way that made your knees weak, preparing yourself to see one of your best friends get rammed by an airplane. But at the very last second, the plane came to an abrupt halt. Shaking on its wheels just inches from the van. 

The four you were relieved but only for a second before you were standing up straighter at the sound of police sirens. Pope practically flinching out of his shoes.

“Guys, I can’t arrested.”

“We’re on probation.” JJ added, referring to the two of you. 

“Look, we’re no good if we’re all in jail.” Kiara reminded, guiding the three of you to follow her into the mess of palm trees and bushes, away from the private airstrip. You all ran for what felt like hours, making a good distance between yourselves and whatever was going down between the three left behind.

Mid-marathon, you all ducked when you heard a gunshot reverberate throughout the woods.

“What was that?” You inquired, fear coursing through your veins. “Did that come from the airstrip?” You worried, making moves to walk back in the direction you ran from until a hand was gripping your forearm, eyes trailing up to land on Kiara.

“We can’t go back.”

“What if something happened?” JJ sided with you. 

“If something happened, we’re too late to do anything now. And we’re too far. Guys, we have to go.” Pope assured. With you and JJ taking one last glance back, you continued following the opposing two further into the woods, carrying hope that John B was okay.

next chapter>

feedback is appreciated! thanks for reading.

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[ariaste]

Ok I haven't seen anyone else talking about this yet, but I'm going insane about it so now it's going to be your problem. The question on everyone's mind during IWTV s1 is, "Ok but did you eat the baby, Louis?" and I'm here to tell you that I had an epiphany and I have concluded....

Yes, Louis did eat that baby. Because of Mardi Gras.

I know that sounds crazy, hear me out.

(Contains spoilers for the end of the book series)

First, for those of you who are unfamiliar, one of the most delicious traditions of New Orleans Mardi Gras is the king cake, which is a ring-shaped pastry of sugary, buttery death covered in purple, green, and gold sprinkles. (If you can get your mouth on a good one, it's divine. Mediocre ones are deeply disappointing. This is a case where quality matters. ...I am getting off topic.) Inside the king cake, according to tradition, is hidden a little plastic baby. Whoever gets the slice that has the baby in it is proclaimed the king of that particular Mardi Gras party and is granted certain solemn responsibilities, such as buying the king cake next year. It's not a very large plastic baby (about the size of maybe two jellybeans), so sometimes you find it in your mouth rather than on your plate. So: You eat the baby, you're the king.

Got it? Great.

Episode 1x07 shows us Lestat Very Definitely Eating That (Fake (Plastic??)) Baby, while being King of Mardi Gras, on the Krewe of Raj (which is probably meant to refer to the real-life Krewe of Rex. Rex and Raj both mean king). This is a wild sort of thing to do for no reason (whether Doylist or Watsonian), but New Orleans residents would probably parse this as a gruesome and tasteless perversion of the concept around the king cake tradition. Gruesome and tasteless perversions of ideas are exactly Lestat's type of humor. He knows what he's doing: He's making a Weird Statement about the legitimacy of his "reign".

Still with me? Ok. Here we go, last step.

The penultimate and antepenultimate books of the series are Prince Lestat and Prince Lestat and the Realms of Atlantis, in which Lestat is Democratically Elected (read: strongarmed/browbeaten/guilt-tripped by a jury of his peers) prince of the vampires. He mopes around about this because he doesn't want the job, but ultimately pulls himself together and makes big wet puppy eyes at Louis like, "plz plz plz mon cher plz come be royal consort, i literally cannot cope with this situation unless I have you with me" until Louis agrees to come be royal consort.

Now, the strangely intense and INTENTIONAL ambiguity of "did Louis eat the baby?" in 1x02 -- that is, the way that there is conspicuously no answer as to whether he did or not -- could just be a cool opportunity to make us think about vampires doing shocking, irredeemable things, such as the consumption of infants. But in parallel with 1x07 and the fact that this is New Orleans and Lestat's baby-eating incident was explicitly rooted in Mardi Gras traditions... it strikes me as foreshadowing. It strikes me as a clever little wink of secret jokes by the Unreliable Narration Show which has already established that it loves playing games with the audience and intentionally leaving little hints that pay off later in a BIG way.

It's New Orleans. It's Mardi Gras. The king eats the baby, and Loustat's destined endgame is Royal Power Couple.

Louis ate the baby. One hundo percent, he ate that baby. Five bucks says we find out the truth right around the time Lestat is crying and wailing and begging Louis to run the vampire government with him.

Season 7 when????

[goodwhump-temp]

Dick Grayson Whump | Titans

1x01 Titans - Door to the face/knocked down 1x02 Hawk and Dove - Shoved, gut and face kicked 1x03 Origins - [Childhood; therapy] 1x05 Together - Punched, gutkicked, knocked against wall, elbowed, knocked out the window, swarmed, pistolwhipped x13, bloody nose 1x06 Jason Todd - Bloody nose, self-surgery 1x07 Asylum - Restrained in a padded room x2, heavily drugged x2, 'seizing', weak, knocked unconscious, hallucinating, thrown out window, hit with a baton x6, bleeding, unresponsive, tazed x2, punched/cut lip 1x11 Dick Grayson - Hostage

-----------------------------

2x01 Trigon - Hostage, [fake world; shot/killed], knocked down 2x05 Deathstroke - Punched x3, bodyslammed, hit with blade hilt, flashbanged 2x07 Bruce Wayne - Hallucinating the whole episode, guilt, talks to hallucination x5, emotional 2x08 Jericho - Punched x7, hit with baton x2, knocked down x2, stabbed x2, headbutted x3, kicked, weak, unconscious, guilt 2x09 Atonement - Punched, bloody nose, guilt 2x10 Fallen - Arrested 💀, pistolwhipped x2, bleeding 2x11 E.L._.O. - Isolated, hallucinating, fever, realized missing, beaten, [Fake world; stabbed x2, killed x2], shaking, choked x2, thrown, gutkicked, punched x3, kicked, elbowed, arm dislocated 2x13 Nightwing - Knocked down, kicked x4, tazed, guilt/grieving

-----------------------------

3x02 Red Hood - Caught in explosion, tinnitus 3x04 Blackfire - Kicked, shot (armor), shoulder shot (clean through), punched--x4, manhandled 3x06 Lady Vic - Bleeding, bandaged 3x07 51% - Thrown 3x08 Home - Hit by a car (13:50), passes out, hospital, hallucinating x4 3x10 Troubled Water - Hallucinating 3x11 Call is Coming From Inside the House - Punched, choked, shot x4 (armor), shot in the neck, bleeding out, kicked x1000 3x12 Prodigal - Actually dead, [crying], coughing, passes out

-----------------------------

4x01 Lex Luthor - Kicked 4x02 Mother Mayhem - Hit with staff, flipped, electrocuted 4x03 Jinx - Punched x2, kicked 4x07 Caul's Folly - Drugged (the cafe), tazed, kicked x2, choked & tazed combo, weak, passes out 4x08 Dick & Carol & Ted & Kory - Drugged, trauma flashbacks, headache (x5), hit by baton x8, manhandled, choked, brief amnesia 4x10 Game Over - Thrown, choked 4x12 Titans Forever - Knocked down x2, punched x2, hit with baton x3, bleeding, arm twisted, choked, heartbroken

[darklinaforever]

To those who say Daemon tarnished Rhaenyra's image by making Blood and Cheese :

In the book, none of Rhaenyra's allies cared and there is no conflict with Blood and Cheese. Daemon did not tarnish Rhaenyra's image and endanger the support she could obtain. The Greens, literally the usurpers, had already shed the first blood of an innocent man.

It's just a stupid scenario invented by HOTD to create drama that didn't exist in the original work.

Plus in HOTD they left Blood and Cheese blurry to make it a possible accident.

So in itself, Daemon may have sincerely just asked for Aemond's head and not that of an innocent child in this version. We don't know what he said at Blood and Cheese, so it's entirely possible.

So all the craziness around Daemon's impulses denigrate Rhaenyra cause is bullshit.

In Fire and Blood, Daemon acted on impulse, Rhaenyra probably didn't know anything and yet as I said, there was no particular problem following that for Rhaenyra cause.

In HOTD, Daemon asked for Aemond's head following Rhaenyra's request and maybe Blood and Cheese simply screwed up the mission.

In this possible scenario, Daemon is not responsible for the assassins doing anything.

And yes, maybe he still asked for this child's head, except that we don't have the scene and nothing really confirms it.

Anyway, even if he did, there is no reason for the show to go in such an excessive scenario for the credibility of Rhaenyra following Blood and Cheese, since once again, it 'is an unnecessary addition to the book.

And we know very well that Rhaenyra will have much greater support than the Greens in any case, because let's be realistic, the writers wouldn't dare change this canon fact. Is not it... ?

(Now I'm afraid I said that and the writers actually decided to write Rhaenyra as having less support than the Greens in their shit show, which would probably be the icing on the cake of betrayals for Fire and Blood book that 'they already did...)

And above all, I will add that it makes no sense that Rhaenyra would suddenly care that she was accused of having someone killed, especially through Daemon.

For what ? Well did everyone forget about Laenor's affair in episode 7 ?!

Literally Daemyra staged his fake death fully expecting to be accused and pointed fingers, which was the case, including for Rhaenys herself, and Rhaenyra managed to live with that very well. People's opinions of her supposedly horrible actions didn't seem to bother him before.

I'm not saying that Rhaenyra reacting badly to the death of a child is wrong, I'm just saying that the fact that she cares so much about other people's beliefs about her for killing someone now... eh well it's not really consistent with 1x07.

But hey, one more inconsistency in this shit show is no longer surprising at this point...

[outmakingmoonshine]

Punch Blanch Freeze Fry

I think punch, blanch, freeze and fry are the underlying themes of season 1-4 and the beef (the meat/the substance/the real connection) will be the underlying theme of a possible season 5.

For context in this scene in 1x01 Ebra, who represents an older version of Carmy, keeps asking Carmy for the beef before he can do anything else. Carmy either ignores him or tries to divert him to do other tasks first. Carmy tells/asks Ebra if he can punch 'em, blanch 'em, freeze 'em and fry 'em before the beef.

Seeing as 3 of these words are specifically talking about preparing food, I googled extensively what punch means in terms of cooking and found nothing and you wouldn't literally punch a raw potato or onion, if anything that would come after the blanching. So it's not referring to a food preparation method like the other 3 so it can only mean literal or metaphorical punching.

S1 - Punch

Coincidentally Carmy was literally punched in 1x01

There were multiple metaphorical gut punches in S1 too. In the first few episodes, most of the season really, he was taking metaphorical/verbal punches from everybody at The Beef. Meeting Syd was a less negative, shock to his system kind of gut punch. We saw him being psychologically beaten down by Chef David in 1x02, being mistaken for Micheal in 1x04, the review & Syd leaving in 1x07, finding out Mikey left him a letter in 1x08, then reading the letter and Syd coming back. Tbh there are gut punches for Carmy every season but early S1 was heavy on the theme of him basically being everyone's punching bag.

S2 - Blanch

Carmy was in "hot water" with Syd, their chemistry was heating up and things were getting "steamy" between them at the start of S2

He was plunged into cold, icy water when he ran into Claire, hence all the heavily blue filtered scenes since then. But the cooling process in blanching isn't meant to last for an extended period of time, it's only supposed to be seconds, much quicker than the cooking process itself.

Carmy entertained/endured Claire (the ice cold water) for awhile in the supermarket, then he tried to get out of the ice water almost immediately by giving her a fake number but she (and Neil Fak) kept him submerged. There's also the blue scenes of S2 that got gradually darker the more time Carmy spent with Claire and the implication/imagery of him drowning and being suffocated by her at the end of their very dark blue sex scene.

Also the fire suppression was in S2! "Fire suppression" is basically what the process of blanching is; cooling down/regulating heat. But the cooling isn't instant, there's still residual heat and "steam" as the cooling process is happening:

And even after the "successful" fire suppression in 2x08 the heat was still there:

Blanching isn't supposed to make food frozen or even cold necessarily, it's just meant to cool it enough to stop the cooking process so there should still be some warmth left.

But Carmy spent way too long in the ice water with Claire and ended up too cold or frozen by the end of S2.

S3 - Freeze

Self explanatory. The theme of S3 was Carmy still being stuck in the freezer, frozen and unable to get himself out of the ice. He can't escape the ice cold water (his relationship with Claire) even in his thoughts, he's submerged and trapped in it. There was barely any heat left between Sydcarmy even though Carmy tried to keep the fire going. Carmy was cold and rigid (like ice) for most of S3.

3 out of 4 line up almost perfectly with the themes of each season and if this theory is correct then the theme of S4 will be frying, which means heat, which means the fire between Carmy and Syd is going to ramp up/become evident again somehow. Probably through frustration with each other as they continue to not communicate properly. Mostly I think Carmy's just gonna be getting cooked. By Claire, by Syd, by Richie, maybe even Nat too.

We kind of saw Carmy take a metaphorical step out of the freezer in 3x10 after confronting Chef David and speaking to Chef Terry (I think it started in 3x09 when he asked Syd to go to Ever tbh, he definitely let himself feel some heat for a second there). So in 4x01/4x02 he's probably going to be dropped straight into the frying pan having to deal with the fallout of his actions towards everyone during S3.

If you think about what happens to frozen food when you put it straight into very hot oil; the pretty volatile reaction when the ice hits the hot oil, the splaterring and spitting oil that will burn if you're too close, the loud noises, the steam that gets released as the temperature drastically changes, the hardening of the outer layer etc (which I hope means Carmy grows a thicker skin and is able to finally tell Claire and the Faks no), I'm guessing that process is along the lines of how things will play out in S4. Similar to how the blanching process played out in S2.

If there's a season 5 I think the theme will be beef/substance/real connection, if not it will be at the end of S4 but I definitely think it's coming. At some point we're going back to the beef/the substance/ the real connections that the show was built on in S1.

[nalyra-dreaming]

re: him potentially healing from burns, he also sounded weak on the call in 1973, didn't he? That could have been just because he was already subsisting on rats or not eating much, but I wonder....

He did.

Rolin said at some point that they didn’t burn Lestat in 1x07 because “you cannot burn him twice“… and so far we haven’t even seen once.

Which is why I think that may have to do with the memory of the tower scene being a fake one (as I don’t buy what we’ve been shown there).

[erikiara80]

The many mentions of dogs are not coincidences. The show even starts with this big parallel

The dog, the witness, the Stranger Things Einstein

We hear a dog barking when Will destroys Castle Byers, imo a connection to both his vanishing and the scene at the end of 1x07. A dog barks when Hopper wakes up in 1x01, and in the sitcom Ray Carroll is watching in S2, before El opens the door like the Demogorgon in S1, a kid wakes up from a nightmare in which, he says, the doctor was giving him his shot (a hint at drugs and mind control? here a post about Alice being a slang term for LSD)

Mention of Cujo before Hopper sees Will's fake body

A dog in Sarah flashback

and a dog in the Nancy and Jon scene at another playground, where everything is staged

Well, the demodogs

Black dog when Murray talks about the mysterious girl with powers

More black dogs

Speaking of El, in S1 Lucas calls her stray dog, in S2 there's a Stinky Fate graffiti behind her, and in S4, The sad fate of our stray dogs on the LIFE magazine. We see it before the cops arrest her. That's an old issue, 1980, not 1986. I think they chose it for the dog mention, to connect it to Eleven. This is also when Will says that his mother must have forgotten something…

Dogs and a glue gun are the first things we see in El's room. By the way, interesting plot that movie, For The Love of Benji

And before that, in the flashback, Brenner draws a dog and says that he's never been much of an artist (Will)

At the beginning of S3, a mention of dogs and doors/gates

At the end of the season, a woman with a dog and the number 10

This mention of dogs (and suffocating) makes me think about Will and Lonnie's truck: Argyle saying that dogs travel in the baggage compartments

Later, Mike says that he's not a dog

In this parallel between Joyce and Victor, he says that the evil was killing even dogs, and then mentions the police chief (Hopper Senior)

And in TFS, little Henry had a dog too, that looks a lot like Chester

[whumpystuffy]

Whump list -Burn Notice (2007-2013)

Main character Michael Weston portrayed by Jeffrey Donovan.

Trailer for the series.

Some of the whump are inflicted on purpose, meaning he could’ve prevented it with his skills but is often undercover so has to withstand the pain. I’ve chosen to include it with cursive writing since you sometimes can see him “faking it” and that kinda ruins the whump for me.

Season 1

1x01 Gunpoint, manhandled. Kicked multiple times, grunting in pain, bloody bruised face, fight, limping, passes out. Aftermath, bruised body/ribs, grunting by movement. Pain inflicted on bruised ribs.

1x02 Inside burning house, coughing.

1x03 Chased, jumps off building, twists ankle, limping, ice on ankle. Outnumbered, fight.

1x04 Attacked, struggle, slammed against wall. Gunfire, hit with ricochet bullet in shoulder, bleeding. Field medicine, bullet removed, grunts in pain, needs help getting dressed.

1x05 Gun to chest, manhandled, pushed to the ground, fear. Blindfolded.

1x06 Fight, outnumbered, threatened. Under gunpoint, under gunfire. Slammed against car twice.

1x07 Under gunpoint, punched multiple times, bloody mouth, manhandled, grunts in pain. Punched, kicked, arm twisted in pain, strangled.

1x08 Fight, hand grabbed, twisted in pain, punched, strangled, heavy breathing.

1x09 Punched, under gunpoint. Strangled by wire, coughing, gasping for air, wound on neck.

1x11 Crying, emotional. Under gunpoint, punched.

1x12 Wanted, gunpoint. Fight, multiple punches, slammed against wall, beaten up, grunts in pain, strangled, bruised face. (Plus major Sam’s whumps)

Season 2

2x04 Beaten up for cover, punched multiple times in face, bloody cut on face, bloody mouth & nose. Handcuffed. Fight, punched, slammed into wall.

2x06 Under gunpoint. Attacked, punched multiple times.

2x07 Chased, outnumbered, thrown into wall, manhandled, gun to chest. Punched, head slammed into table, all an act though. Hit with bat, pain, strangled, interrogated, punched.

2x08 Bruised back shown from previous episode, worried mom. Car crash, pain, limping.

2x09 Pushed against fence, gun point, pinned against wall, pistol wippped, fear. Field medicine, head wound, stitched up.

2x10 Hit by explosion, unconscious, needs help walking, pain, injured arm. Tied to chair, hooded, interrogated. Homemade arm sling. Pain/grunts caused by movement of shoulder. Fight, punched, bruised face.

2x11 Under gunfire. Emotional, manhandled, angry, held back.

2x13 Hostage in bank robbery, gunpoint, threatened, punched, bloody face cut, field medicine.

2x14 Attacked, knife cut on arm, bleeding.

2x15 Fight, punched multiple times, slammed against wall.

2x16 Fight. Wanted by agency, on the run.

Season 3

3x01 On the run, surrenders, handcuffed, arrested, in jail. Painfully gets arm twisted, interrogated, shoulder dislocated, grunts in pain, begging, painfully set back, ice pack on shoulder. Shoulder twisted again, shot at, fear. Tied up, punched, cuts wrist by freeing himself, fight.

3x02 Tied up, interrogated, multiple punches, knife play in face, cut, fear, bloody mouth.

3x03 Cuts himself on glass. Brother shot in front of him.

3x04 Hit’s himself, bloody cut, bruised eye.

3x06 Attacked, outnumbered, fight, tasered, unconscious, manhandled, captive, tied up. Fight, escapes. Rough fight, grabbed by throat.

3x09 Shot with rubber bullet, coughing, pistol whipped.

3x15 Threatened, inside burning warehouse, coughing.

3x16 On the run, wanted. Hit by explosion, bloody head wound, kicked, foot on neck, pinned down, suffocating, jumps off building. Car crash, dizzy, fight, slammed against car multiple times, bruised face, hooded, handcuffed.

Season 4

4x01 Bruises from previous episode. Rough fight, under gunfire. Crying, emotional whump.

4x02 (Plus Jesse’s whumps)

4x03 Slammed into table twice, gunpoint. Punched, interrogated, manhandled, grabbed by throat.

4x05 Fight, knife cut, bleeding.

4x09 Walks into trap, gunpoint, hostage, tied up, punched, threatened. Attacked, fight.

4x10 Attacked, thrown through window, pinned down, cut, bleeding chest wound. Field medicine, stitched up. Handcuffed, prison undercover, threatened, power play. Multiple small fights.

4x12 Walks into trap, outnumbered, gunpoint, pistol whipped, bleeding head wound. Manhandled, shot in shoulder, bleeding out, interrogated, in pain, car crash, unconscious.

4x13 Coma, life support, head wound. Discharges himself, arm in a cast, refuses painkillers. Lots of pain throughout the episode by moving injured shoulder.

4x14 Still pain from bullet wound in previous episodes.

4x18 Car crash, on the run, rough fight, emotional, crying. (Plus Jessie’s whump)

Season 5

5x03 Paranoid, night terrors, punched.

5x04 Drugged, unconscious, tied up, interrogated, plastic bag over head, choking, gun point. Hostage, tied up, explosion blast.

5x08 Pistol whipped, bleeding head wound, threatened, gunpoint, tied up, kneeling, interrogated.

5x10 Inside burning building, burns arm, field medicine. Cuts himself, bloody head wound, manhandled, gun point, punched, pinned down, grunts.

5x11 Rough fight, gunpoint, tied up.

5x12 Hostage, forced to do job, punched, threatened, head slammed into disk, pinned down, bloody head wound, threatened, kicked.

5x16 Mind games, emotional, talks about dark past.

Season 6

6x01 Crying. Fight, hit with metal bar. (Plus Jessie whump)

6x04 Emotional, hit by explosion blast. (Plus Sam’s whump)

6x06 Major emotional whump episode, crying, brother dies in front of him..

6x07 Shot in vest, grunts in pain.

6x10 Attacked, punched, bruised ribs, pain when moving throughout episode. Jumps through window, bleeding face wound.

6x11 Bruises from previous episode. Fight, captured, gunpoint, handcuffed, interrogated, kicked multiple times, electrocuted, in pain, bloody mouth.

6x12 Emotional, wanted, on the run. (Plus Jessie’s whump)

6x14 Hit by flash grenade, ringing ears, dizzy, gunpoint. Tied to chair, burned with curling iron, hooded, manhandled.

6x17 Attacked, gunpoint. (Plus major Sam and Jessie whump)

6x18 Emotional, blood donated by syringe. (Plus major Sam whump)

Season 7

7x01 Bloody knuckles, rough fight, punched multiple times, bloody face, strangled, lip cut.

7x04 Cut on arm, bleeding, bandage, manhandled, punched. Waterboarding, handcuffed, interrogated, coughing.

7x06 Breaks down crying.

7x07 Tasered, unconscious, blinded, manhandled, interrogated, sleep deprived, worn out. Dragged, weak, drugged, hallucinating, breaking down, crying. Needs help walking, limping.

7x08 Hit by explosion blast, limping, field medicine, bandages. (Plus Jessie’s whump)

7x10 Tied up, gagged, punched, kneeling.

7x11 Attacked, rough fight, knife cut on arm, bleeding, field medicine. Cover blown, slapped, punched, bleeding face wound, interrogated, gunpoint, pain inflicted in arm wound, begging.

7x12 Bruises from previous episode. Fight with best friend, not himself.

7x13 Shot in the shoulder. And lowkey suicidal.

Phew! What a show I must say. Enjoyed every minute of it. There’s a lot of good whump here and I think this list speaks for itself! It’s lowkey reminding me of MacGyver but with a twist of The Mentalist?

[fuesch]

Agatha All Along 1x07 with mentions of my boy again, my apologies

Hello again. We are at the beginning of my 2nd watching of this episode, so I can polish my review. Except I haven't even finished watching it the first time: I had the episode paused at the very beginning of the credits, because of that song. Okay, let's get through this…

We finally see Lilia again - only to cut away from her without explanation. Argh, what is patience?! What, was she resurrected just for her trial? Give me answers!

"I have a mom." Awwww <3. Good thing Billy can't remember his previous life or he might not have accepted the Kaplans, even after 3 years.

"Is Wanda Maximoff really dead?" - "Yes. … No. Maybe." Pfft, it's like when Peter asked Raven if Magneto is really a bad guy XD. Wait a minute! There's more than just the structure in common here! It's a Maximoff asking their reference person (Is there a film/TV term for a character who's another character's main contact point?) - who's a baddie but not really - about one of their birth parents.

"Did you see a body?" Look at him using his brain! I like it when characters do that.

"Hey, you want straight answers, ask a straight lady." LOLs were had. I love her, your honor.

I'm loving all the banter, but then the mood takes a turn. Ouchie. And I wonder if Agatha's definition of success will change. After all, what's the point of living if you have nothing to live for?

Agatha in disbelief over Billy not believing her, but she doesn't look crushed. Maybe someone who sees through her facade is exactly what she needs.

Daaamn, horns look good on Billy (very nice outfit & make up, 11/10). Which is obviously a reference to his multiverse uncle, our beloved Mr. Horny Stiffy.

Lilia & Jen are alive! \o/

Ooh, here we have Lilia's predictions in order. It's so satisfying when stories give you enough information to put the pieces together and then confirm that you did it right.

We're in an earth tunnel with not much happening and yet the story is so good! Exposition, feelings, bonding!

"We're not cool, Teenager." - "Damn, using his full name." XD

Loving the Dory reference. Loving even more that Jen is defending Lilia.

"I was doing a reading for you." - "That's right." Billy remembers the bar mitzvah! So is he also still William or just got his memories?

Lilia really only cast the sigil because Billy needed time? I mean, it makes sense, but it's so anticlimactic.

That Maestra is great, I wish I could put it into better words.

Ooh, I didn't expect to get more of Lilia and Jen bonding.

Jen calls Lilia's mind travelling in time a "mental walkabout" and I wonder if that was a very deliberate choice of words. As a Lost fan that show is the first thing I think of when I hear "walkabout" (though that word might be far more common than I'm aware) and it had a character's mind uncontrollably time-travelling. Actually apart from Lost and AAA, there's only one other example of mental time travel that I can remember (not that I have a memory like a sieve) and that was Logan's controlled journey to 50 years in the past. But let's not talk too much of X-Men. ahahaha

Heyyy, Billy's spell book! So I guess the Salem Seven pick it up and then lost it in the tunnel.

As Billy calls himself the queerent, Agatha gives him a fake laugh. Jeez, girl, you didn't invent the queer puns, let others have them too!

"Am I William or am I Billy?" Yeeess, let's answer this already! He is so focussed on the important questions this episode, I love it.

The disappointment that punched me in the gut when I realized that what Billy and Lilia had been talking about earlier in the ep wasn't the tarot reading from his bar mitzvah but from the trial. This non-linear editing is so cruel. Hey, show, I didn't a demonstration of what it's like to be Lilia!

Reunion, huh? How ambiguously worded. If there isn't some disappointment ahead, I'll eat my tinfoil hat. Hey, in German we say "broom" instead of "hat" - combined those objects might refer to a witch. Fascinating.

Hahaha, Agatha hating on the subjectivity of tarot.

There was a subway station for real! But what is it doing there? And a little fun fact: That underground tech reminds me of Lost's hatch. Wait a second, it was mentally time-travelling Desmond who lived in down there!

So proud of Jen choosing to go with Lilia instead of the subway.

Jen has immense spiritual power? Man, am I looking forward to seeing that in action!

Oh, is that a crown on Rio (and what is she holding in her left hand)? Since she's the Green Witch, I'm assuming those crowns mean that their wearers are the most powerful in their category. Wait, so Billy's is blue and if the shade doesn't matter, that would make him the heir of Evanora, so it's super fitting that Agatha is mentoring him. But what does the blue even mean? I thought it represented water as in potions, but that doesn't work with Billy. But if Jen has spiritual power, maybe that's what she has in common with Billy: I have no idea what exactly they mean by "spiritual" and if it intersects with Agatha's spirit witch stuff, but the spirit is the mind, so that would fit with Billy's mental powers.

Rio is actually Death herself, not just one among many reapers as I had assumed. Man, that workload must be insane, she's gotta have underlings! Anyway, why was she appearing in the tunnel? Did she save Lilia and Jen from drowning in the mud? Does she have more things planned for them?

The roots are glowing green and I'm confused. Since I had the thought that the Witches' Road must be Death's invention, it wouldn't make sense for Rio to have a trial. And neither would having that trial in the penultimate episode already… unless that last one is a denouement ep. Oh, please, no, I don't handle those well.

I love that by turning the tower card, the room turns as well. Lilia defeating the Salem Seven* is awesome too, I just wish this show wasn't so deadly for its main characters! *I hope that's what's happened here, but are they even alive and thus killable in such mundane ways? God, I hope Lilia did more than just buy her coven some time.

See? See?! If the Salem Seven are gone, that only leaves Rio as the villain, so if she's up next, that sounds incredibly anticlimactic for the final episode. Maybe that's why we get eps 8 & 9 together. Oh, or it's a two-parter, yes, yes. *fingers crossed*

What exactly is that last scene trying to tell us? That time is circular, you're dead now, but one day you'll be born again? Or that even right before the end, Lilia was skipping through time, living some more?

Very familiar guitar notes playing. Credits start, the song dares to continue *gasp* YOU DO NOT PLAY THAT SONG! UNLESS YOU ALSO MEAN SOMETHING ELSE BY IT! They can't be fucking with us that badly, can they? Nah, they mean the MCU will come full circle with the Fox X-Men and one in particular. Everything is fiiiine, lalalalala.

In conclusion: Another great episode, right in the fucking feels though. So mean to give me amazing character stories only to take away the characters right after!

[starseneyes]

Spock / Nurse Christine Chapel - Star Trek: Strange New Worlds S2 Ep 1

Yes, folks, I am back with more Meta analysis of my unexpected-but-welcomed favorite ship of Star Trek: Strange New Worlds. If you missed my Season 1 Meta, here's a handy link to my Spock/ Chapel fun!

Yes, we know from the TOS timeline that it all ends in tears. But I'm still wildly invested because Ethan Peck and Jess Bush are crushing these compelling scripts. If you're like me, you're going to have a blast with this one!

I hadn't decided if I was going to post weekly or all at once, but the poll was overwhelmingly for weekly. So, the weeks we get solid Spock/Chapel, I'll post a Meta. If it's borderline, I'll batch the episodes, instead.

SPOILER ALERT: I'm as liberal with spoilers as Spock is with Blood Wine. Don't click the Read More button if you want to keep your obliviousness intact!

Everyone clear on how this works? Huzzah! Let's dive in.

The Broken Circle

Feeling All the Feels in Sickbay

Spock sits in the observation area with Dr. M'Benga, still reeling from the events of the Gorn. It reminds me of T'Pol confiding in Dr. Phlox on Enterprise. Both Vulcans found themselves in similar situations—usually carefully-guarded emotions unleashed.

And both will have to learn to live with it.

For T'Pol, a part of her enjoyment of emotions was the new intimacy she found with Commander Tucker—Trip. For Spock, his growing attraction to Nurse Chapel is torture.

But I love the set up of Dr. M'Benga as confidant. He is the only one who knows both sides of what's happening, here, even if he doesn't have the details.

All of Spock and Christine's more intimate moments prior to this episode have been in a bottle, so-to-speak. Yes, T'Pring and the Serene Squal crew witnessed the fake-out-not-so-fake kiss.

But T'Pring wrote it off as part of deception, as did most of the crew (save Angel, who was actually paying attention).

None of the Enterprise crew was there to witness their lip-lock and subsequent unease. Nobody was listening in on their conversation in Sick Bay later. When she held him in the corridor, everyone else was at the wake for Hemmer.

To this point, Christine hasn't even spoken to Erica about Spock. She's kept it bottled up inside.

But Dr. M'Benga is observant. And he has a whole array of sensors (or sen-sores, if you're Spock) on our half-Vulcan/half-human boy.

As Spock plays notes and cords his fingers remembering the fundamentals of mathematics and music taught as a child, Dr. M'Benga monitors. Yes, that's helping. His heart rate is going down.

Until, whooosh, she walks back into Spock's life. And his heart rate shoots up. The discordant note rings out as Dr. M'Benga looks back to the monitor.

Spock's eyes follow and he awkwardly stands, trying to right the askew chair without looking back at it.

Chapel greets him without emotion.

"Lieutenant."

This is even more divorced from intimacy than her typical, "Mr. Spock". Because now they both know he has a growing attraction to her.

Before the hallway in 1x09, I think we could argue that Spock was not completely aware of it. Yes, he felt things in 1x07 with that kiss. But both T'Pring and Christine told him what he wanted to hear—it's not possible for him to have feelings for her.

But as he wrestled with the floodgate of emotions overwhelming him during Hemmer's wake, it was Christine who was there for him. She enveloped him in her arms, offering comfort and respite. She offered herself as a safe space in that moment.

And as they pulled away, I'm convinced they were still holding hands or she was holding his arm, based on how her arm swung as he departed. Spock didn't understand what he was feeling as he looked at her, but he knew he was feeling.

Spock made the choice to walk away that day because he knew he wanted to kiss her. And she knew it, too.

Christine has always been the one to put up hard blocks between them. He's a shipmate, and I doubt she sleeps with shipmates in her quest to avoid attachments. She certainly didn't want to be on Dever's ship!

And I get the impression she doesn't want to be the other woman. She doesn't even want a real relationship. They terrify her.

But Spock's a relationship guy. She already knows that because he's bloody engaged. So, she's going to do everything she can to create distance between them... even though we all know she feels something for him, too.

The awkward chair adjusted, Spock excuses himself. Christine's eyes follow him long after he's walked out the door and down the hall. Yes, she's putting up barriers... but only because she needs them as much as he does.

"Fascinating." "Isn't that typically his line?"

She's still looking his way. This awkwardness sucks because they actually have a pretty decent friendship. But it's necessary to keep the distance.

"It's just that when he saw you, I-" "Don't even." "No. No. I wouldn't."

These two are dear friends who have been through hell together. He knows her so well, and I appreciate that so much in this episode—their beautiful friendship.

I've replayed this scene over and over. I don't think it's likely she's confided in Joseph what happened in the hallway. But, I think she also knows he's got a unique view, here.

And he knows better than to meddle in her love life.

He also knew from the moment she walked in that she had more to discuss than coming on duty. That suggests to me that he properly took a read on the room—whatever this Spock/Christine thing is... it goes both ways.

Remember that as we work through this episode.

The Plan

Spock stands in front of the amassed group, speaking equally in all directions. What stands out is who he has assembled for this conversation. Most of them make perfect sense, right? Folks from the Bridge, the head of Sick Bay.

And Nurse Chapel. None of the other nurses have been invited to this shindig. But no matter what else is going on between them, Spock trusts her. He wants her there, to be someone to offer counsel, if needed, as she always has.

"What plan?" "I would have thought it obvious..."

Christine is standing on the other side of the island, putting some physical space between herself and Spock. But she's leaning toward him—all in.

He looks to her in surprise, then surveys the rest of the group to see if they are also confused. Yup. Spock managed to leave everyone out of his plan even as he's stating it.

"We must steal the Enterprise."

Look at our girl smirk. I saw a bunch of people post, "hijinks!" at that moment in the show, and it made me laugh. We know she's up for some hijinks.

"Stole the Enterprise? ... Wow. I would have lost so many bets." "Yeah, Vulcans can surprise you."

Christine is swelling with pride looking at him right now—her eyes not leaving him during this entire exchange. It was the right call, even if it technically was the wrong one.

And look at Spock staring back like a schoolboy basking in the radiance of his crush's attention. We both know she's been surprised by him on more than one occasion. But this time is different.

This time, he had to disobey a direct order to make the right call. That's a very difficult thing for any person to do, let alone someone who is half-Vulcan. Logically? This was a crazy call.

But it was the right call. And that's fucking sexy.

Also, there's a very personal edge to Christine's line and the way she holds Spock's gaze. This isn't the first time he's surprised her.

I think nothing surprised her more than his hand on her ass and his tongue in her mouth. Like, seriously, the guy can kiss. But, again, that's something only the two of them (from their crew) know about.

Now, others are getting to see just how surprising their resident Vulcan can be.

"Sir. What if Nurse Chapel and Dr. M'Benga on that ship?" "They thought it worth their lives to prevent another war. Logical."

Simultaneously this hurts like hell and feels like warm sunlight after a frigid night. Because from the point of view of everyone on that Bridge, Spock's words are pretty stark.

Void of emotion. Praising their logical choice of self-sacrifice. Ouch.

But we know beneath the surface, there's a volcano churning and waking, just waiting to erupt.

I think it also makes him care for her that little bit more. Not just that she's in danger, but that she's able to make such logical decisions where others might surrender to emotion. I think they're very evenly matched, there, at this point.

Christine shirks emotional attachments and love. She keeps a shield up around her heart and leans into logic. Spock was raised on Vulcan to be a Vulcan—attached to logic and devoid of emotion.

As he is grappling with the emotions unleashed in the wake of losing Hemmer and battling the Gorn, she is struggling to keep a cap on her own emotions—to keep him at a distance when more and more she wishes she could close it.

It's not a lack of desire that keeps them apart. Spock is engaged and doing his best to stay true to the promises he has made. He's never had to struggle to this degree before.

And Christine understands his struggle more than most—she witnessed him wrestling with it after crushing a bulkhead. She knows he struggled with judgment and derision growing up. She knows he doesn't know what to do about this.

So she's making the decisions for them, and that's a good thing.

"Photon torpedoes locked on the federation ship. Full spread. Mr. Spock?"

Watch his face. He knows he needs to order it. He knows what the logical thing to do is. But his emotions are getting in the way, like he feared.

"Not yet. Any signal from Nurse Chapel or Dr. M'Benga?"

And there it is. He's waiting. He's trying to wait it out long enough to give them a chance to escape. To give her a chance to escape.

"Mr. Spock, it's now or never." "Fire photon torpedoes."

The emotion in his voice. He knows this is what he has to do. It's the right call. But this time it feels wrong.

Spock closes his eyes. He can't watch it happen. He can't watch his order destroy the ship where she is.

He can't handle the impact of his emotions swirling and swimming within him, threatening to explode in the Captain's Chair as the False Flag Federation ship does in space.

He killed her. Of course, we know that he didn't. But he believes that in this moment where he chose to do the right thing... he killed her.

And we all saw how destroyed he was with his loosed emotions by losing Hemmer—a friend. Yes, Christine is a friend, but she's also his safe place, his confidant, the first woman he's ever desired in a Human way.

Notice I put that last. Because the connection he and Christine forged was over shared bullying, over her being a good friend and offering advice, over the two of them sharing hijinks and learning to trust one another.

The desire came in later. It's not desire for her that's destroying him right now—it's the severing of one of the deepest connections he's ever made in his life with another soul.

Christine has been there for him. She stood up for him. She helped him. She accepted him. She comforted him. They forged their bond strand by strand, and to have that cord suddenly severed... it's agonizing.

Spock's eyes finally open, and there are tears in his eyes as he beholds the destruction. He's holding back... but barely. It won't take much for those tears to spill.

"Sir, I'm detecting a Federation EV suit transponder."

Hope. It hits him hard, and he leans into it as he stands and strides off the bloody Bridge to meet them in the Transporter Room.

He doesn't know what he'll find when he gets there. It's a single transponder, right? Will he find M'Benga standing there without her? Find Chapel standing without M'Benga?

All he knows is that he has to be there. He can't hear about it secondhand from the Bridge. He needs to see it with his own eyes—whatever he's about to see.

Transporting to Enterprise

Visually, this is a stunning sequence with us wrapped in the transport with M'Benga and Chapel, then settling with Dr. M'Benga as he reaches helplessly for the out-of-focus, unconscious Christine. We're seeing through his eyes—the blurry vision of a friend who's too still.

We're at floor level when Spock rushes into the room. He can see M'Benga clearly moving, but zeroes in on the lifeless Christine.

He kneels on one knee and shakes her shoulders, hoping for a response, for some smart-ass comment. But none come. He shakes, again. Nothing.

He leans down to her lips, hoping to feel the rush of her breath, hear the exhale and inhale of life. But it doesn't come.

Now, I'm not going to get into the science of Spock's actions, because I've seen a lot of discourse about it, and smarter people than I can say what is feasible and not after 45 seconds in space. I'm only going to talk about Spock, Chapel, and M'Benga.

Spock laces his fingers together, and for the first time we see the perspective staring up at him. The voice is distorted—as though heard through a tunnel.

"I waited. I waited. I waited for you."

Oh my gosh. Spock just admitted to her that he held off on destroying that ship and stopping the restart of the war... for her. How very... human.

And, oh, how Spock's heart is breaking right now. He's desperate for her to know that he did what he could... that he didn't want to kill her... that he chose to hold off. He needs her to know.

And he doesn't even fully understand why, yet. I posit he's never experienced romantic love. Marriage to T'Pring is logical. He cares for her, but he does not love her.

He's falling in love with Christine... and he doesn't even realize it. He doesn't understand it. But when he thought she was dead, a part of him was dying, too. It was revived long enough for him to find her... lifeless.

No. This is not how this ends.

"You don't die. You don't die. You do not die."

It's a plea. A wish. A dream. And somewhere in her haze between life and death—she hears him. She feels him. She knows he's there.

A gasp escapes her lips and as it does, Spock collapses to the side, nearly on top of her, his leg that was holding him up as he administered compressions giving out.

The weight is gone. She lives.

His right hand goes to her shoulder, gripping as though releasing her would lead to losing her, once more. His left hand falls the other side of her as he leans on it for balance.

Christine focuses first on getting air back into her bloody lungs. But her second urge is comfort. She sees Spock hovering over her, knows he's the one who brought her back, and can feel his weight against her.

M'Benga smiles to see her breathing, again, and bears the only witness to this interaction (save the Transporter tech, who is apparently somewhere off-camera and not at all bothered by lifeless bodies).

Christine's hands both reach up, but one can't make it past a bent arm. Her right grips onto Spock's left arm, working its way up to cup his face.

Her fingertips graze his Vulcan ear as her thumb wipes away his Human tear. All parts of him, she accepts. And what a beautiful visual representation of that.

Spock is exposed, here. Completely vulnerable. Yes, the block that kept his emotions at bay has been removed. But he makes no attempts to conceal his pain and relief from Christine. He is wholly himself—for better or worse.

And Christine knows him. Much as she fights what is between them, right now, those lines don't matter. Neither of them is pretending.

She sees that even though she's the one who almost died, he's the one who needs comfort. And as her fingers linger as long as her strength remains, she quips.

"Why you gotta be so rough?"

Her hand falls to his shoulder, then his arm, and then down. Her strength is gone, spent on a moment of comfort for Spock... but not wasted. No, never wasted.

Because whatever this is, it's far from one-sided. Yes, they are both running from it, and for good reason. Spock is engaged. Christine doesn't want to tangle with that, or the threat of an actual relationship.

I mean, c'mon, Spock's clearly a relationship guy. That's not what Christine wants at this point at all.

But in this broken moment caught between life and death, they allow themselves that contact they would otherwise shirk—they allow themselves the moment.

SIDE NOTE: The instinct of Jess Bush to wipe that tear away is so fucking perfect. Do I know for certain that it wasn't in the script? No. But looking at the angles, that perfect falling tear isn't always there. So, I like to think Ethan Peck pulled out an amazing performance and Jess Bush's instincts kicked in and we got that stellar shot that says so much. And I'm grateful.

The door opens and others whisk in. Spock straightens, breaking away from the intimacy, but he holds his grip on her shoulder until Uhura's voice breaks through, calling him back to the Bridge.

Have you ever had someone in your life you could break around? Just completely break down and let all the stuff show without worrying about them judging you? That's what Spock's found in Christine.

He gave into that moment. He let the emotion flow. Yes, he's having trouble controlling it, right now, but we see him composed in the very next scene talking to the Klingon Captain. He can rein it in.

But with Christine he doesn't have to. He lets her see his brokenness. Lets her wipe away his tear. Lets her see his hurt.

He doesn't have to be anything in particular when he's around Christine. He doesn't have to worry about being too human or too Vulcan. He can simply be.

"You wanna know the worst thing about living almost forever?" "The loss of those you love." "Oh, you sweet, un-Vulcan Vulcan. No. That's a pain shared by all those who live with even a half-open heart."

This strikes me. Because while I don't know if I'd call what Christine and Spock share "love", yet, it is certainly a form of it.

Spock nearly lost her before they had a chance to figure out what it is. And while we all know it'll end in tears based on the TOS timeline, I'm still strangely addicted to finding out what happens next with these two.

And, not for the last time this episode, someone calls Spock out on being an abnormal Vulcan. And he appears to take ownership over that distinction a little more each scene.

Angel once told him that it wasn't about "what" he is but "who" he is. And though these emotions flowing freely are a pill, they are forcing him to confront that a little faster than he might've.

Sleeping Beauty

Spock stands over her bed, as if holding vigil while she sleeps. She's still recovering, still resting, still recuperating from her time in space. And much as he doesn't understand it, Spock knows he has to be there.

He has to reassure himself that she's living. He has to relive the moment of losing her, getting her back, losing her again, only to bring her back to life with his own hands.

With his words he killed her. With his hands he restored her.

And yet he still cannot believe it until he sees her there, in the flesh.

"Mr. Spock. I didn't hear you come in. Are you alright?"

It's almost a courtesy to even ask. He can tell from the man's posture that he is far from alright. In fact, I feel like M'Benga is almost giving Spock an out... the opportunity to deflect.

But he is still Vulcan... and lying isn't his strong-suit.

"Yes. I just..."

Because physically, he is alright. But emotionally, he's a wreck. M'Benga reaches out, placing a hand on Spock's shoulder. You can see him relax into his emotions just that touch more with the acknowledgement.

"She'll be fine."

She will. It's true. Someone else said it. And we know how much Spock values people telling him what he wants to hear.

But he's still crumbling. Because he knows, now, what it's like to lose her. Yes, it was only for a moment... but that moment destroyed him.

And, look, I'm not trying to be melodramatic. But Spock's emotions are running crazy, and we already saw what he was like losing Hemmer. He was unhinged. He was denting freakin' bulkheads.

He was angry about losing Hemmer. Losing Christine? He was devastated.

Hemmer was a friend. Christine is so much more. So, even though they're destined to burn out and it'll all end in tears... she's a part of him, now.

And losing her—even for a moment—tore into those fresh emotions like a hot knife through flesh. Burning, aching, agonizing.

Scars from something like that don't just disappear—even with dermal regenerators. Spock is going to be feeling the side effects of that moment for a while, yet.

"I'm not... I..."

Words fail him. Because he doesn't know what truth to tell. What truth this is. Because all of this is new, and it's frustrating, and it's confusing, and he's not sure what any of it means.

There isn't a nice, neat formula when it comes to love. It's messy. It's problematic. It's heartbreaking. It's chaotic.

"I have no words for what I feel."

Facing him fully, Spock puts a level of trust in M'Benga, here. And M'Benga sees just how upset Spock really is... to the point of tears.

"Yes," M'Benga breathes as they both look to Christine.

Spock tears himself away, turning over the same should he did when he left Christine in the corridor in 1x09.

The camera zooms in on Christine, turning a little fuzzy around the edges before cross-fading to Spock's fingers on the instrument... an expression of emotion, right?

And right now, he's overwhelmed with emotions for the blonde nurse who stood up for him against a bully. For the woman who refuted his belief that he was broken, and instead offered him comfort. For the person who bonded with him over childhood trauma, but isn't afraid to tell him plain truth when he needs to hear it.

He plays for himself as he tries to let the melody unwind all the tightly wound emotions choking him within.

This episode spent a lot of time establishing Spock's status as "not your typical Vulcan". The Klingon Captain calls it out. Pelia calls it out. And Spock himself affirms it.

He's still a Vulcan... but his humanity does make him unique.

And while M'Benga established that Spock's emotions are heightened due to his Vulcanness, he's approaching therapy from a Human angle—and it's working.

Is Christine Chapel more than a vehicle for Spock to explore his burgeoning emotions? Heck, yeah! I think this episode did a good job of establishing that for the season. A war veteran. A kick-ass fighter. A brave Human willing to give her life to prevent a war.

Yes, there's going to be more Spock/Chapel to come in this season... but the show did a good job of establishing early in episode 1 that there's so much more to her than that.

And even if she's destined to meet her future fiancé on bloody Vulcan (how cruel is that!?), I'm still excited to see what comes of her and her pointy-eared would-be suitor.

Where do we go from here? Heck if I know. But I do know that I'm enjoying the ride.

Thanks for reading! And I hope to see ya on the next.

[heartbreakslow]

Da$h watch 1x07

"Do you not want to have sex with anyone or just me?"

Cash goes to pick up an order from Harry's (with Chook, Jayden, and Tilla waiting for him) and gives Darren a death stare.

Darren tries to watch sports and get takeout with their dad, but when he asks them what’s wrong because they don’t usually hang out with him, they get mad and leave. 

At school they basically act like a first grader pulling their crush’s hair, making fun of Cash for wearing…a turquoise t-shirt? (Idg fashion I guess.) When they ask him to participate in the direct action he immediately agrees and there’s a couple moments in the school occupation where he kinda takes the lead and seems to be using his crime skills!

They have only one scene together but it’s a doozy. Cash is sitting in the hall by himself when Darren comes and sits down with him. Cash looks glum but can’t help but smile when Darren makes fun of his shirt again. Then things get serious.

Cash: I know you think I’m scared, eh, but I’m not. I’m just trying to figure stuff out.

Darren: …Do you not want to have sex with anyone, or just me?

Cash: Anyone.

Darren starts asking more questions, and Cash articulates his flavor of asexuality (without the word ever being used): “I like kissing you, but when it becomes more, I don’t get the urge to go any further. And if I do, it’s not enjoyable.” It gives the impression that his past experiences were consensual but awful.

Darren makes a bunch of “what not to say to an ace person” comments (“well have you tried it?…Maybe it was just bad sex or with the wrong person”) and Cash is becoming frustrated trying to get across that he just doesn't enjoy sex. Darren suggests that the two of them could take it slow or try to find something Cash likes, but he’s not biting. He’s on the verge of tears as he asks, “so you’d be totally fine if we just never did it at all?” They look shocked and can’t answer, so he makes them agree to just be friends. They agree, fake smiling while looking like they're about to cry, and abruptly leave. He cries by himself.

Then Darren watches him sleep and pines!

Some more Darren bits: when Quinni asks "am I too much," Darren says, "yes but you're my too much"--I think that's very indicative of how Darren defines love! Also, Peter is happy that Darren was in the protest!

Thoughts:

It’s really sweet that Darren tries to go to Peter for company when they’re sad, though of course they end up pushing him away. After Darren comes out of the building at the end, Peter high fives them and pats them on the back and Darren just looks...so happy about that approval and like they're trying to hide that reaction. I LOVE THEM.

I think the hallway scene is great, in the vein of the Bobby and Darren pronouns scene in ep 1. It’s not about being educational or spoonfeeding you why you shouldn’t say shitty things. (I like how Darren says “but you can get a hard-on” and the show doesn't even stop to unpack that, Cash just ignores it.)

Rather, the point of the scene is how the marginalized person feels. Darren doesn’t get it and Cash is frustrated, and he feels hopeless that their relationship could ever work. When they say “maybe it was just bad sex” he literally facepalms!

I also think that even though the description of Cash’s asexuality is written as well as it can be, it’s a lot to deliver and King Will is knocking it out of the park making it sound so impassioned and natural. The lines about his past experiences imply so much pain despite being so short and vague.

What is so great about this show’s portrayal of asexuality is that it’s not attempting to be generic or universally relatable. There is no one ace experience--there are so many traits that are combined differently. Having a character who's queer, very romantic and sensual, AND sex repulsed and low libido, instead of like "bleep bloop, if you don't want sex you must not want anything else," is so satisfying. Also, representation aside, it's a new story.

On a Darren note I do think it shows a lot of maturity/growth that they have this conversation, even though it’s messy. I’m not sure he would have been ready to make up with them at this point even if they’d said everything right. I also think that agreeing with Cash’s request to just be friends was done out of respect and maybe some guilt at not having respected his boundaries before. 

[remember-the-hurt]

Putting the thread I wrote on Twitter on here so I can reblog it when Tedbecca is endgame💜

——————————————————

Why Tedbecca IS what the show has been setting up since the beginning:

- “what if I did get on there (Bantr) and I met my soulmate and it changed the whole course of my life?” // “this job you gave me has changed my life”

- REBECCA was (for a brief period of time) supposed to be at Ted’s door in 1x07 but the writers decided that their relationship should be protected and that a one night stand should never happen.

- The parallels in this ep were NOT needed. They could have shown Sassy at Ted’s door and here we go, Ze End. But they WANTED us to think it was Ted.

- Same thing for the cut in 2x05: both fake outs came at a moment when it would have been AWFUL for them to get together. Literally NO Tedbecca shipper wanted them together in S2, please no. Neither of them is ready, it would have been a horrible mess. The editors said that the philosophy in the editing room is “plant and pay off”: the fakeouts are here because Tedbecca IS happening. In writing, you don’t foreshadow things that won’t happen. And the writers ain’t the GoT writers, they’re not here for twists to trick the audience. The cut from Rebecca to Ted in 205 is absolutely criminal but if the writers really wanted to show a platonic relationship, they wouldn’t bother with these kinds of fakeouts: they just wouldn’t show anything that would as much as *imply* T/R could be romantic. But they do, because they want the audience to consider it, and it’s something we can go back to when they kiss. Like “oh yeah, they foreshadowed it TWICE, that’s right.

- The way they *see* each other better than everyone else ?? Rebecca was the only one to notice Ted wasn’t okay in 2x04 and 2x06, Ted arrived at the church right when she needed him... and that’s just 3 examples.

- The parallel scene in 2x10... they are LINKED by something that happened 30 years ago on the same day at the same time. When they didn’t know each other and were on different sides of the Atlantic. Both their lives changed this day: they both lost their fathers. They are SOULMATES. And no, not platonic soulmates, although they ARE just friends now. This is not what this is about here: if they wanted to show us platonic soulmates, they wouldn’t have kept them separate for most of S2. They would have shown them being ✨besties✨. They are NOT best friends. WHY this need for distance? Because they are connected in such a deep way that if they were left alone, they couldn’t hide. They would see right through each other.

- the way Rebecca reacts to seeing Ted in a suit in 104? Ma’am… why even show us that she finds him attractive if it won’t come back? It will come back.

- Ted looking like a kicked puppy after Rebecca leaves his office after the 211 truth bomb…

- They’re not ready for dating in S2: Jason said “if you have some things you need to work on, maybe going to the dating scene isn’t the best place to find it”. None of the relationships they started this season could last.

- We have PLENTY of m/f platonic friendships on the show: Ted/Keeley (which we thought was gonna turn romantic for a brief moment, remember? THAT’s a subverted trope here), Rebecca/Roy, Rebecca/Higgins, Rebecca/Beard... so the argument of “omg let a man and a woman be friends” just doesn’t stand. And anyway, the best romantic relationships start with friendship. It’s literally the most solid foundation you could ever find. You think they’re just gonna find love randomly offscreen? Sorry to tell you but that’s not how screenwriting works.

- Brett RTd this article and said it was “excellent”.

- One of the producers quoted this Tedbecca fancam with this... of ALL the “lightning” tweets??

- I love Rebecca with all my heart and I just know that she cannot and will not end up alone. She was in an abusive relationship for 12 years and I don’t believe for one second that the writers would not give her a romantic happy ending. She IS gonna find her lightning, this speech by Roy was not a throwaway moment. She’s been shown as longing for romance and partnership multiple times now. This woman won’t end up alone romantically, and if you think she should you understand neither the show not it’s character.

- Ted and Rebecca’s future partners simply have to be each other: can you imagine dating someone who said someone else was their soulmate? And this someone else saw them better than anyone else ? And this someone brought them homemade biscuits every day? And this someone looked exactly like their celebrity crush?

- Our beloved creator himself read this excellent thread and liked the winking gif😌

- thank you Anthony, thank you Han!

- the men Rebecca dated in S2 all add up to Ted: John is age appropriate and “not shy”, Luca is handsome, and Sam is kind. And they’re all nice to her. Who in the show is age appropriate, handsome, kind, not shy, and nice to her? Ted, Bingo el ringo!

- Finally, the Higginses, who Jeremy said are intentionally the model couple of the show, are paralleled to Tedbecca multiple times.

Ted: “You and the missus, y’all have been together a while yeah?”

Higgins: “28 years” (105)

vs

Higgins, to Rebecca : “I’ve been married to her for 29 years” (205)

Higgins to Ted: “When you’re with the right person, even the hard times are easy” (105)

vs

Higgins to Rebecca: “I suppose the best brand is just… being yourself” (205)

In 301, Rebecca mentioned Ted spitting water all over her face with Higgins right there.

Higgins, who met his wife after he spilt his beer all over himself. Enough said!

- I’ll let Brett have the last word:

Interviewer (around S1) : “I never thought that they could be together”

Brett: becomes this emoji😬

[qqueenofhades]

re an ask that you got earlier, how much do you think ivan acrually even knows about the darkling's secret history?

Prior to the events of 1x08, I think it's most likely that Ivan knows a good deal more about Kirigan's plans than the rest of the Grisha, but by no means all of it, and it's not clear whether that extends to Kirigan/Aleksander's true identity. What we do know in canon/semi-canon about Ivan's character and beliefs includes the following:

In 1x02, during the carriage scene, it's clear that Ivan deeply feels/resents the historical persecution of Grisha, since he tells Alina that the Little Palace has walls to protect them because it used to be a death sentence to be one, and Kirigan has now made them powerful, respected, and feared.

In 1x03, in the "why are you eATiNg fIgS????" scene that makes me laugh every time, Ivan clearly thinks that Alina's main mission/purpose in being at the Little Palace and harnessing her power is to tear down the Fold. This indicates that as far as he knows/Kirigan has told him, that's what she's supposed to do. Kirigan himself isn't there, so there's no reason for Ivan to pretend otherwise/say anything other than what he thinks.

In 1x06, when Ivan interrogates the Conductor about the plot to steal Alina out of the Little Palace, that's probably both when Aleksander's overall plans began to change and Ivan became aware of it. Maybe it was first the plan to let Alina explore her power, fall in love with Aleksander, and willingly lend him her light so they could control the Fold/rule Ravka together etc, but after she ran off, Aleksander had to improvise on the fly and accelerate his plans to find the stag/bind himself to Alina. This is most likely when he tells Ivan that they need to get the amplifier and put it on her no matter what, and Ivan agrees. Still, however, thinking that this is so Kirigan can use her power to tear down the Fold.

In 1x07, while David is the one who actually puts the collar/amplifier on Alina and Aleksander, Ivan is the one who holds Alina in place while David does so. This point in the books is also where he tells her that all the male members of his family (father, uncle, two brothers) have died in Ravka's wars against Fjerda, and that's the reason he trusts the Darkling as the only person who can protect Ravka strongly enough and/or stop the fighting once and for all. Simon also mentioned a deleted scene referencing Ivan's backstory, which is probably this scene/happens in this episode, but they cut it.

Also in 1x07: Ivan is present when Alina angrily asks Kirigan if "Aleksander is a fake name too." It's possible that this tips him off to the fact that there's more to Kirigan than it appears/confirms any suspicions he might have had that "Kirigan" isn't who he really is. But this isn't clear.

By 1x08, when Ivan goes into the Fold with Aleksander and Alina and acts as Kirigan's bodyguard/killer of everyone else while the shenaniganry goes on, it's clear that he's decided no matter what, it's still his job to serve Kirigan as his loyal second-in-command and trust that he knows what he's doing. Ivan's last line in s1 before getting yeeted off the skiff by Jesper is to Alina, as he's Heartrending/trying to incapacitate her: "How dare you [turn on Aleksander]? He gave you everything!"

So overall, even if Ivan didn't explicitly realize until 1x08 what Kirigan was really doing, he stayed loyal while it was happening, or at least until the point he was chucked off into the Fold and we don't know yet what happened to him after that. HOWEVER, if it's Word of God that both Ivan and Fedyor survived both s1 and s2, we don't know why Ivan didn't choose to come back to Aleksander and continue to fight with him. Maybe his mind was changed by Fedyor, he was upset about Aleksander leaving him behind to die even after he had helped him carry out the Fold plan, he was otherwise occupied, etc etc. But leaving it at "he was just detained and couldn't get back in time" doesn't seem likely, since even if Simon himself was too busy to come back for s2 and they decided to move Fivan to s3, they need to come up with a compelling in-universe reason for it.

Simon's headcanons for Ivan are a) that he's possibly part Fjerdan and/or has Fjerdan ancestry (since the Fjerdans are Scandinavian and Simon is Danish), which might have led him to often get his loyalty to Ravka questioned and made him very touchy about it, b) Ivan is actually quite fragile and that's why he acts so tough and standoffish, and c) his one weak spot/soft point is Fedyor and their relationship. I don't know how much the writers have or will explicitly incorporate any of this, but hey, that's what Simon thinks.

They could go with Ivan being ancestrally Fjerdan if Fivan ends up at the Ice Court in time for the s3 Crows heist (especially since Fedyor was the one who forced Nina to turn Matthias in and the druskelle might want revenge on them). Or maybe he or Fedyor got mixed up with jurda in Ketterdam, or maybe Ivan will be the leader of the Cult of the Starless Saint and the political opposition to Alina as the new queen of Ravka/leader of the Grisha. Because they're considerably off book by now and have leeway to basically invent further Fivan storyline as they please (since Fedyor and Ivan obviously aren't supposed to survive past Siege and Storm, but I SHALL TAKE IT), we don't know.

Just give me more Ivan/Fedyor otp and Ivan/Jesper foetp. Please and thank you.

[goodwhump-temp]

Castle Whump | Castle TV Show (2009)

1x01 Arrested, nose pinched, handcuffed, held at gunpoint, pushed 1x03 Ear pinched 1x06 Scared, embarrassed, shot at, threatened, risks his life 1x07 Threatened, punched, undercover, creeped out, held at gunpoint/punched, black eye 1x10 Slammed, manhandled, threatened, worried

2x01 Rear-ended, held at gunpoint, risking life, held at gunpoint 2x02 Nervous 2x04 Interrogated, sad 2x06 Tackled, manhandled, bit, childhood trauma? 2x07 Sad 2x09 Papercut, punched/icepack, handcuffed, paranoid, intimidated, worried 2x12 Self restrained, heartbroken the whole episode 2x13Hostage, held at gunpoint, pain, headbutt, guilt 2x14 Upset 2x15 Daddy issues the whole episode, fake headache (08:24) 2x17 Panic/worried 2x18 Panic/worried, runs into burning building 2x19 'Cursed,' papercut, chair breaks, pain, death threat, bullied/panic/coffee 'explosion', dog attack, scared, elevator panic, cuts finger 2x21 Jealous, heartbroken 2x22 Threatened (22:45), jealous 2x23 Jealous, heartbroken 2x24 Manhandled, heartbroken, sad

3x01 Shot at, held at gunpoint multiple times, insulted/arrested, ear pinched 3x02 Held at gunpoint 3x03 Mad, heartbroken 3x06 Held at gunpoint, restrained, manipulated 3x09 Abducted, injected unconscious, bruised 3x11 Upset 3x12 Upset 3x13 Worried, shock, shot at, hurt hand, bandaged 3x15 Emotional 3x16 Exposed to high levels of radiation, worried/emotional, shot at, trapped 3x17 Trapped, hypothermia, passes out, cold, scared 3x18 Worried 3x21 Intimidated (09:47), betrayed/jealous 3x22 Poked (pain/33:40) 3x23 In shock (41:20) 3x24 Dangerous situation, worried, confrontation, angry/heartbroken, mourning, emotional/crying

4x01 Pushed against the wall, emotional, heartbroken, depressed, worried, confrontation, held at gunpoint 4x02 Cries 4x03 Jumpscared, jumps into trashbin (is fine) 4x05 Betrayed, angry 4x06 Freaks out 4x07 Hostage, held at gunpoint, life threatened, almost shot, confrontation, restrained, presumed dead 4x08 Dragged, threatened 4x09 Worried 4x10 Handcuffed, drugged, missing, tiger attack 4x12 Denial 4x14 Manhandled, punched multiple times, 4x15 Captured, held at gunpoint, trapped, car crash into water 4x16 Car crashed into water, drowning, reprimanded, 4x19 Worried, feels betrayed/very heartbroken, angry 4x20 Heartbroken/coping, acting strange 4x21 Held at gunpoint, hungover, in danger, gut punched 4x22 Heartbroken, surrounded, jumpscare 4x23 Emotional confrontation, tearing up

5x01 Held at gunpoint, restrained, worried 5x03 Emotional 5x04 Arrested 5x05 Hand cut (minor), framed, arrested, scared, threatened, missing, car rammed, bleeding, shot at 5x06 Emotional (happy), upset (not happy), paranoid, zapped 5x08 Held at gunpoint, hunted/missing, captured 5x09 Upset (abandoned), betrayed 5x15 Daughter kidnapped, worried, very emotional, panic 5x16 Worried, missing/desperate, held at gunpoint, betrayed, almost killed, captured, emotional 5x17 Paranoid 'cursed,' flustered, flashbanged 5x19 Wheelchair, paranoid, falls, panic 5x20 Threatened (evil gorilla), trapped, back pain, scared 5x21 Jealous 5x22 Worried, pain montage (ear pinched x2, shoved, poked, nose pinched, freezing to death, punched multiple times, all near death situations), denial 5x23 "Shot" at, finger nicked (not serious) 5x24 Upset, sad

6x01 Abducted at gunpoint, car crash, arrested, taken, exposed to toxic chemicals, 1 day to live 6x02 Infected, slowly dying, weak, passes out, hospitalized 6x03 Briefly held at gunpoint 6x04 In danger, held at gunpoint, shot, unconscious, bruised pain 6x05 Foot stabbed, limp, manhandled, choked unconscious 6x09 Guilt 6x10 Sleep deprived 6x12 Held at gunpoint, captured, betrayed 6x17 Worried 6x18 Ninja attack, held at gunpoint 6x21 Bummed/sore loser, comforted by the boys 6x22 Worried, hunted, paranoid, arrested 6x23 Held at gunpoint, restrained, car crash

7x01 Car crash, thought dead, abducted/missing, hospitalized/comatose, amnesia, mysterious past: (shot, dengue fever) 7x02 Held at gunpoint, found evidence: emotional, scared 7x03 Knocked back, punched multiple times, paranoid, held at gunpoint 7x04 Bullied, thrown to the ground, kicked 7x06 Insomnia, shot at, trapped in alt. reality, panic, held at knife point, abducted, threatened, shot, bleeding, passes out, guilt 7x07 Punched, manhandled, in danger 7x10 Hand sliced, held at gunpoint x2, heartbroken 7x11 Choked, peppersprayed, comforted (kinda) 7x12 Jealous, coping, abducted at gunpoint, betrayed at gunpoint 7x13 Panic, knocked unconscious, pain, stranded, guilt, denial 7x15 Worried, angry, arrested, emotionally tortured, tazed 7x16 Trapped, exposed to toxic gas, weak 7x19 Held at gunpoint, restrained 7x20 PTSD/reoccurring nightmares, therapy, obsessed, everyone worried, headache, held at gunpoint 7x21 Nervous, betrayed, held at gunpoint 7x23 Scared, childhood trauma (+threatened), childhood trauma, feels betrayed, tackled, knife attack, throat cut, bleeding

8x01 Punched, kicked, drugged/abducted at gunpoint, restrained, threatened, extreme psychological torture, wrists bleeding, painful kick to the ground, shot at 8x02 Feels betrayed, angry, held at gunpoint x2, emotionally hurt/betrayed 8x03 Depressed, coping 8x05 Coping, held at gunpoint x2 8x06 Jayne anxiety/jumpscare x2, held at gunpoint, ambushed, held at gunpoint, tackled, bloody nose, heartbroken 8x08 Worried, exhausted, heartbroken, confrontation 8x09 Slapped (8:15), pushed to the wall x2 8x10 In shock, embarrassed, guilt 8x11 Betrayed, handcuffed, threatened 8x12 Kidnapped/drugged, trapped, betrayed at gunpoint, sacrifices himself, held at gunpoint 8x13 Undercover, shot, "dead" 8x14 Flashbacks, aggressively patted/hit, held at gunpoint, feels betrayed, watches the video (after being shot, pain, worried), guilt 8x15 Guilt, hungover 8x16 Zapped, scared (Linus) 8x17 Falls, back pain, held at gunpoint, shot at, delusional (genie) 8x21 Superstitious spooks, wrist grabbed/pain, jumpscare x2, knocked out (offscreen), icepack 8x22 Hunted, shot at, worried, captured, restrained, interrogated, drugged, betrayed, crying, angry, shot, bleeding out