#every day there is dust
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[enter FOOL wearing sunglasses as a Stayin' Alive remix plays on loop]
First and foremost, you must remember that I know nothing about anything--never have and never will. The second thing you must know about me is that I am obsessed with time loops and anything time-and-space related (not just Dr. Who specific, chill, whovians), which includes the multiverse and layers of reality. Various timelines existing at once and so on. It's been done over and over again, and I can't get tired of all the interpretations and stories.
A truly satisfying story, in my humble fool's opinion, relies upon the use of seemingly innocuous pieces of the story recurring in such a way that they gain importance, gain a narrative weight, and start to predict patterns that can tell and add layers to unfolding events/character arcs. A watch is just a watch until you see how many times the reader's attention is brought to it, until we see it fixed, and later broken, for some reason or other. It's a piece of symbolism. In that same way, authors essentially "time loop" everything in a story to make consistent themes for characters to struggle against or within. Not many excellent examples are coming to my mind because I'm an old woman and it's bedtime, but here's some brief mediocre ones:
I would argue that The Shadowhunter Chronicles (TSC) is about time loops (without, of course, being about time loops) because of the cyclical nature of each "era's" narrative. Female Main Character, Two Male Love Interests (of various interest), curses real and imagined holding everyone back, over and over and over and over. Told and retold. This creates layer, which then creates significance when Clare varies the loop just a little bit.
Or, look at tragedies. I may have spoken about tragedies before (they're another personal favourite of mine), but what makes a tragedy, well, a tragedy? I argue that many are a tragedy because they are about time loops. The characters are stuck in a situation they are forced to play out to the end--and it will always have ended with the same bitterness, one way or another. The narrative is inescapable. Each time you open a book, it's going to happen the same. No matter how many times you tell the story of Orpheus and Eurydice, he will look back and she will be lost to the Underworld forever.
Now, this in mind, look at time loops themselves: they absolutely are all about grief. Whenever I have worked with time loops (god, I love them, I will always be trying to sneak one in somewhere), they are essentially an embodiment of grief. To me, grief has always been the replaying of something over again in your mind, playing it to death, trying to find how you got from Once Upon A Time to The End, how many other ways it could have gone, how many other endings you could have wound up with, why this one, playing it to death, trying to find out how you got from Once Upon A Time to The End, how many other ways it could have gone, how many other paths you could have taken instead, playing it to death, trying to find how you got from Once Upon A Time to The End, how many other ways it could have gone, whether you could have asked her to stay, whether you could beg, whether you could have punched him, if remembering to buy that carton of milk would have saved them from the accident, if a firmer step would have stopped you from falling and ruining a life forever, if you hadn't looked back--if somehow you trusted the god of the underworld--if you had only heard her voice, some confirmation she was there--if, if, if--
Grief is ugly. It's screaming, it's wailing, it's tear streaks, it's clawing at the dirt, it's reversing the clock, it's rereading old messages, it's listening to voicemails, it's rewatching recordings and movies, it's going back to the same place the murder happened trying to remember just one more clue to put your spirit at rest forever. It's a time loop. It's going back, driven by stubbornness, madness, desperation, the feeling that this time--this time--you can find something to do differently so the loop breaks.
All stories are about time loops, except time loops. Because time loops are about their inherent grief, regret, knowledge of a mistake requiring correction. Being stuck. Doing something over.
Staying alive.
Keeping someone else alive.
Keeping something, a memory, alive still in the only way you know how within your limited power.
All stories are about time loops, except time loops. Time loops are about grief.
Anyway, time to go rewatch all the Spider-Man movies that exist so I can live once again in a time-loop that spans universes as I try to also predict whether the next Spiderverse movie is going to break the loop.
[exeunt FOOL jingling merrily to something that has transformed into a Christmas carol]
all stories are about time loops, except for time loops, which are about grief
#time loop#tropes#writing#wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff (happy now?)#time travel shenanigans#t. leeaves grows increasingly insane as time goes on#every day is a time loop#every day there are dishes#every day there is vacuuming#every day there is dust#every day there is work#every day there is sun and moon#day and night#every day the world turns on and times moves no matter how still I stand#empires rise and fall#species rise and fall#everything rises and falls again and again and again#history repeats#it's always been about time loops#the time loops themselves are about the grief of inevitable repetition
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playing around w slightly different hair renders
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#yuuji#megumi#cries megumi fought tooth n nail..... i refused 2 flip the canvas tho >:(#i vastly prefer drawing him facing right bc fr some reason it makes his hair look better silhouette-wise#so having him face left is alr a Challenge#but also having him slightly look down (difficult angle + changes the silhouette) had me bashing my head in2 th TABLE#same thing happened earlier this month w gardening megu middle pose . i did not learn my lesson#but even worse w this one yuuji's head is blocking th main pointy part tht basically carries the entirety of the shape language#u can imagine my distress i am sure#anyway th render made me a lot happier with it thank god. colours hard carry bless <3333#i didn't plan on making it a full sheet but i needed 2 remind myself that im good at drawing megumi#so i threw in solos of each of them n tried slightly different render flavours#idk how Different all of them look visually but th process fr each ws Very different so i am satisfied#fight aside this ws useful i think! got 2 break out some Clunkier chalks n dust off a few of my smoother blended brushes#think i picked up some things i can keep also !! which ws. u kno. the Goal#tbh every time i do art studies i feel like i am kirby#one time i got called an art ditto by one of my fav artist mutuals when i did a style challenge#SUCH high praise from her it lives in my mind i take it out on days when i feel like trash#it doesnt Sound good when u say u r good at copying but real talk it is such a good skill i am very happy 2 have it in my arsenal
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Its huskerdust week over on twitter and I dont have time to partake so this is my compensation :') <3
#REALLY wanted to try do a vintage/retro screenshot vibe with them#dont think i got it quuiiteee down but its a lot closer than last time i tired it :D#I love them sm i miss drawing them every day i dont lmao#huskerdust#huskerdust fanart#angel dust#angel dust fanart#angel dust hazbin hotel#husk#husk fanart#husk hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel fanart#tribbleart#<3
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the mighty nein - critical role
this is a place where i don't feel alone. this is a place where i feel at home.
#also with softer vibes. i offer They#every silly little brainheart found family deserves a to build a home edit#the mighty nein maybe most of all. thats my family#also the lyrics deliciously well suited to m9.#when jester pulls that. stupid tarot card for fjord. home or traveler. and there's a carnival wagon. and veth says Thats Us! . them#i just think about . the tower is their home the xhorhouse is their home the lavish chateau is their home the balleater. the mistake.#the nein heroez. veth and yezas apartment. the dome. fjord and jesters living room floor.#a bar with a silly name on rumblecusp#also like. the song has stone and dust imagery. gardens and trees.#the inherent temporality of life and love and how that holds no bearing on how greatly people can love. im losin it okay.#ive been making this edit for days straight with my computer screaming at me for trying to shove 143 episodes of cr into a 2min20sec video.#crying becuase. theyre a family do you get it. they were nine lonely people and most of them had given up on seeing their own lives#as something that might be good. something that might make the world a better place. and in the end they're heroes.#and it doesn't matter if no one else knows because They know they're heroes. and they wouldn't've believed that was true when they met.#rattling the bars of my enclosure. to be loved is to be changed#posted on twitter and want to get in the habit of posting here too bc.#general reasons but also bc . i have noticed some of the ppl liking/sharing it are also ppl who shit on my ops by vaguing about my posts#which is in general whatever but does leave a funny taste in my mouth.#critical role#the mighty nein#cr2#caleb widogast#caduceus clay#jester lavorre#fjord#veth brenatto#yasha nydoorin#beauregard lionett#mollymauk tealeaf#my posts
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update VIVZIE CANNOT STOP LIKING HUSKERDUST ART ON TWITTER
#you better believe i'm checking every day#huskerdust#angelhusk#hazbin hotel#angel dust#husk hazbin hotel
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Cross has trouble getting to sleep alone in his room and goes looking for a distraction, but ends up finding a solution for both of them
#UTDR#UTMV#Cross Sans#Killer Sans#Kross ship#(Kinda. It's up to interpretation)#Long post#I'm so sorry I didn't mean for it to be THIS much#I started this like a week ago -A-#Lies down and lets out a long howl it's finisheeeeeed#I could have just drawn them spooning and written the rest but noooo I love to do things the hard way#Anyway I think they should be bed buddies#The company helps Cross relax enough to sleep and the touch helps knock Killer out#Cross has to be big spoon because otherwise Killer's soul gets squished and it's too uncomfortable to sleep#Also I realised Cross and Nightmare are the only two in the castle who didn't have knock knock jokes in their backstory#I like to imagine Nightmare has had similar confusing interactions with at least one of them#Cross probably spends the rest of the day panicked that he overstepped a boundary or the others will make fun of him#Not realising that Dust and Horror have fallen asleep together many times#Or that Killer hasn't slept properly in weeks and he's in heaven#I'm NOT drawing a follow up so just imagine Killer coming to Cross's room the next night and finding every excuse to stay#Because he wants it to happen again but he has no idea how to ask (and also Cross seems kinda awkward about it)#Absolutely terrified that I spent my whole week off working on this and it might be not that great so I hope at least one person likes this
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Charlie: Angel is smiling, did something happen?
Angel: What? I can’t smile just ‘cause I feel like it?
Husk: Valentino tripped and fell in the parking lot.
#Angel: *snorting helplessly*: he’s so fUckin’ blind and TOTALLY ate shit I haven’t laughed that hard in DECADES#Angel: I mean he beat the shit out of me afterwards- but you know- worth it#husk: *currently bandaging angel* was it?#angel: oh absolutely#husk: *sighing* I mean it WAS pretty hilarious#Charlie: 😍#Vaggie: get a fucking room#angel: WE ARE LITERALLY IN MY ROOM WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE#angel dust needs a hug#consensually#preferably from husk#huskerdust#borrowed from incorrectborhapquotes#I just need to see Valentino eat shit#-Angel dust probably#Angel dust#husker hazbin hotel#hazbin charlie#hazbin angel dust#husk/angel#they’re in love your honor#husk knowing Angel can handle himself but practically itching to take a shot at Valentino#Angel is a BAMF#Hazbin hotel#incorrect hazbin hotel#niffty manages to steal the voxtv footage of Valentino falling and presents it to Angel#he watches it every day#(pssst niffty was the one who tripped Val)#he never saw it coming#she can’t wait to add the whole moth to her collection
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ok listen. listen. hear me out. what if Angel was the one to propose the contract
like.... the intensification of heartbreak and guilt when Val tells him 'I own you, or have you forgotten that?' as Angel looks at his signature, the heart he drew next to it. the extra layer in 'what's the worst part of this hell? I can only blame myself'. and above all it plays well with my observation that their contract had to have been composed with some level of input from Angel, because... why on earth/in hell would Val have given him control of his life outside of the studio; and while Val invokes the contract to put Angel back in 'his place', Angel invokes it to remind Valentino that he can defy him. It's actually similar in composition to a kink contract/agreement--if I'm in this specific place, you hold all the power and call the shots; but outside of it, I don't give you that level of control. Angel can straight up tell Val to fuck off in front of a crowd and all Val can do is say he'll make Angel regret it next time he's in the studio (and isn't that an extremely dark variation of the classic kinky romance beat of 'sub misbehaves when they're in public and can get away with it, dom promises they'll pay for it later'?)
so like. all of that about the contract also works if Val proposed it, but I love headcanoning that their relationship was on the rocks around the time it was signed, and one of the factors was Vox coming onto the scene... and so now i'm just thinking about Angel in his peak era of both-sides-ing their relationship problems, knowing his 'commitment issues' (partly real, partly consisting of val's 'you know other men??' issues) are a major cause, furious and disconcerted at someone else drawing so much of Val's attention, wanting to make a stupid desperate Hail Mary pass to save their relationship but devoid of the usual options of 'have kid' or 'impulsively propose marriage' or 'move to a new house that's inevitably haunted' i watch too much horror, going for the option of '...hey do you want to make the kind of binding contract that is accessible to us?'
and surely it's not that stupid! he's only really giving Val a formal version of the power he gives him already, right? Val's his dom and his director and manager, and maybe there's... problems but it's mostly been great for Angel so far, so if having it on (magic eternally binding) paper would make Val happy and make him understand that Angel really wants him, wants them, the risk is toooootally worth it. just, best not to tell Cherri about it she'd definitely think it was insane.
(and when, much later, she learns about the contract and berates him for being an idiot and not telling her when Val brought it up, maybe don't correct her assumption. just keep it to yourself and feel even worse.)
#valangel#angel dust hazbin hotel#valentino hazbin hotel#happy days in hell (hazbin tag)#this is a just for fun awful idea excepting the .001% chance it's what actually happened#in which case i'm a genius#but i stand behind my 'their contract (what we know of it) is reminiscent of a kink contract#and angel seems to have signed it willingly (and with love-the HEART) so it seems more relationship-based than a 'deal' per se' insanity#(angel just does Not seem like he'd sign away control of his soul even part of the time in exchange for money/fame etc and there's so far#no mention of Val giving/owing him anything in return for that control)#(tho again. i may be proved wrong it's early days yet shrug emoji)#i know 'addict' was a fansong but it WAS made canon and i froth about#'til death do us part/but we're already past that phase' every time i remember it#the marriage/kink contract equivalent coding of Val and Angel's relationship... <- me insane at 3am staring into space
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i love that the murder time trio all have dangerous little greetings. horror has his little hand drill thing. killer puts a knife up his sleeve and then does a little switcharoo. dust INSTINCTIVELY shoots whoever he sees with a bone. no greeting whatsoever. so just imagine how things go on a first meeting or whatever. immediately horror and killer have to dodge bones from dust and horror's like hey wtf man. mildly irritated but he just met these guys so he's willing to forgive. he's not gonna lose his cool in front of these two random ass guys even though one just tried to kill him. killer just has that dumbass smile on his face like always (but he was intrigued when dust did that. like who tries to kill someone on first sight?? he's curious now :3)
and then theyre all just standing together and staring for a moment and horror sticks out his hand. killer takes the bait but then he just points a knife to horror's stolen eye once he realizes that he got duped and his other hand is now currently being drilled into. dust didn't shake either of their hands because he could see the drill and tell that killer had something off about him in general. but he does give a tiny smile when he sees the state that the two r in rn with the drill and knife. it's an eensy bit funny in his eyes
least violent mtt interaction
#overall?? first good impression on all their parts#except horror because he doesn't like to get threatened or risk dying#but he gets over it (he never does)#i'm at that stage of mtt fan where i cant afford to ignore phantom paps anymore and leave him out from the hc#immediately once dust saw the other two paps commented on how ugly they were#dust must have the strength of fucking Hercules or something because like#phantom papyrus probably drops some of the most hilarious bangers that only he can hear and he just CANNOT laugh or else he'll look dumb#i wouldnt last a day in dusts shoes if phantom paps said shit like that. i'd die of holding back laughter#how many off hand comments does paps make he just has to let out his laughs in private#violence is sooooo funny to them they wish they could throw the other 2 into a volcano#triglycercule will you ever run out of mtt ideas??? i dunno......#as long as im alive i can find a way to make my life about the mtt#this post was written august 22 still a peak idea tho LMAO#the phantom papyrus making outrageous comments thingy is funny enough to be its own post HOLD ON LMAO#listen this didnt happen in my mtt fic LITERALLY about them meeting but it did in another universe TRUST TRUST TRUST#tricule rant#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#murder time trio#utmv#sans au#i'm so eepy....... i need to stay awake................#still have 70 soon to be 71 drafts left in my loaded gun we WILL survive through the winter if i eat one draft every day
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come back 2 bed or its laser eyes for u
#superman#clark kent#batman#bruce wayne#dc#superbat#clarkbruce#i just needed 2 draw batman smiling ngl#if i dont every 3 minutes i will turn to dust#also can u tell ive been watching the 2004 animated series all day lol#nachtart
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now that the seven busiest days of the year are FINALLY over, I can get back to my Maximus insanity. here have a close-up of the hands and arms that make guest appearances in every daydream I have ever had
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#fun fact: every night i am getting absolutely WRECKED by him in bed because we’re Married™️#i will have more to say tonight but honestly what more is there to say#hands hands hanDS HANDS HANDS HANDSSSDS#i need him to grip me like the fleeting glimpse of happiness#i need to hold onto him like he’s my last chance of joy#ohh how i have missed being on this blog every day all day#this is my entire support system#having a rough time so i think i might rewatch gladiator#no one is having as bad a time as maximus#so we can be sad and lonely together#and then happy and fulfilled together! *sobs*#but anyway#salivating rolling on the floor screeching at volumes previously unknown to man over this picture#i wish i were that white dust all over his hands#i wish i were on my knees between his legs looking up at him while he holds my face in his hands#I WOULD GIVE ANYTHING#TO MAKE HIM SMILE#TO SEE HIM LAUGH#TO FEEL HIS SWEET TOUCH#gonna have a full on mental breakdown over him#gladiator#maximus#maximus decimus meridius#gladiator 2000#russell crowe#text posts
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shadow 🤝 elise: emotionally repressed sonic love interests gang
#elise after taking all her heartache and grinding it into dust under her heel: perfect! but why am I sad#unironically I think these two would have a great respect for each other#Elise sees in shadow someone who came so very close to disregarding the world for his pain but chose that responsibility#in Elise shadow sees someone who makes that choice of sacrifice every day.#they both could burn the heart of the world down easily. they choose not to.#LIKE. DO YOU SEE IT#there's a connection between them i promise i just need to get more mentally ill#sonelise#sonadow#sth
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☝🤓 What if 🤨🤔! I was back 😨🤯 after some months 😞😤😲... ahahah jokes 🧐🤣😂... unless 😳👉👈
#wren text tag#wren draws stuff#it has been a while ^_^ guess it's time to remove the dust from this blog eheh#anyway gaslighting all of you so I can pretend I didn't go on hiatus every 2 working days lol next year it will be the year I am sure 💪#I say while I'm waiting to get the appointment to have my wisdom teeth removed (as if I didn't have enough bullshit in the past few months)#did the check up some days ago and they really went “yeah. ur old. those are your wisdom teeth. we have to remove them sorry 😅😬😔💔💔”#I guess karma didn't know what else throw at me “idk make her bones annoying this time lol” so unoriginal man ugh wish I could unfollow 🙄🙄🙄#idk what else to add. Look at the drawing of my sona and wait (she's so silly omg 😖🤭🥰💖💕✨)#Speaking of ✨art✨ I have some stuff that were supposed to be posted this summer but UHM I will post them here nonetheless#imagine they were posted in time alright. I'm still working on learning how to warp the time-space continuum 🙏#and then I'll be back posting fresh cringe 🥰💖 can't wait to draw all my stupid silly little dumb angular blorbos#I also have memes to redraw with the StS characters tehehehe I'm so evil. nefarius. wicked. foul. villainous if you will#where's that emoji of the cat looking mischievous#😼😼😼#OH YEAH I also I have a bluesky. it's doodlingwren so uhmn. do what u want with this information. I'll make a decent announcement later on#there is no art for now over bsky. But you can see me blabbling abt my own forgetfulness (?)#also I changed the color theme for this blog. It's not that important but I think it's nice#logged in after some time and when I went to change my age in bio I got blinded by the light color combo 😂😭#I might do some lil changes in the next few days but so far it's good :3 the blue looks nice
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Friendly reminder to all my queer peeps to be as weird and undefinable about your identity as your heart desires, the world is a better and more colorful place because of you and you make being queer such a joy, love you very much okay mwah mwah
#Sunny Life#every time I see a ''weird'' identity I'm so happy someone has the words to express their queer joy#bc at the end of the day that's what it is; joy in being able to express yourself so freely even if it seems#contrary or weird to other people bc fuck that#if you treat queer identity as allocishet 2: electric boogaloo by forcing everyone into tight little boxes#I'm coming into your house and filling all your shoes with shaving cream and saw dust
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do you ever think the insult was added to injury of Angel having to do like, sponsored porn. Ninety takes because he can't manage to put an ounce of enthusiasm into 'oh no, please don't rip my Hardcore Wonderland Series Mushroom: Makes You Smaller variant Corset By Velvette'
#'sponsored' meaning one of the others vees just asked val to promote something that is#angel spent all his energy on dropping overt mentions to his Voxtech! phone and Voxtech! apps without gagging#learning 20 different names for the same corset with different colored ribbons every season and speaking them with faked emotion is too muc#angel dust#happy days in hell (hazbin tag)#hazbin hotel vox#hazbin hotel valentino#hazbin hotel velvette
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linh song as silvermist this. linh song as silvermist that. what about linh song as rani huh? what about that
#this will only make sense if you're deep deep deep in the disney fairies canon but come on... i see the vision... do u see the vision...#rani from the disney fairy books haunts me daily. i think about her every day#silvermist ily but rani is THE water fairy 2 me#6 year old me read fairy dust and the quest for the egg and was like Oh My God. it made me go insane#disney fairies#kotlc#linh song
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