#dont get me started on health
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"Money can't buy happiness" OK perhaps but it can for SURE buy all the shit you need to complete the bottom two tiers of Maslows Hierarchy of Needs so
#who made up that stupid fucking saying?#we live in a society#where money is a necessity for all things#stupid ahh#anti capitalism#capitalist hellscape#you cannot buy food without money#and you cannot have the means to create your own food because you first need to buy land#dont get me started on health
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OLLD drawing I can share now of Timmy after recovery and care from staying on double life and being looked after by the box boys~
He’s healthier, happier, his hair and wings have grown back out and have a pretty blue-black sheen to them (that he never knew he had bc in hels his diet and environment only let them be dull) and he just heard the sound of a portal opening for someone to come visit~!
#I’m still gonna draw scraggly Timmy most of the time bc this version is only after a LONG long road of peace and health on double life#BUT LOOK AT HIM!!!!#my fave bit is that he still gets to have his long hair like he likes but he’s confident enough#to push it out of his face with ren’s glasses when he wants#the glasses also let him flip them down and protect his eyes which he needed a LOT when starting out#the sun is so warm and pretty but his eyes have known mostly darkness of his cave in hels so he needs some light reduction here and there#anyways I’m so happy to share this I will always love and explore pathetic creature Timmy and DONT GET ME TWISTED—he’s still very pathetic#even when healthy but he’s learned and growed and gets to put meat on him bones#gets a bit more of that Jimmy broadness in his shoulders and stands up a bit straighter so ppl realize even more that he kinda tall!!!#ok enough yammering BAM HITS U WITH THE TIMMY SMILE RAY HAVE A GOOD DAY#hels to pay au#htp art#Timmy#htp spoilers
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On average, what is the total MONTHLY amount that you spend on dining out*?
*(This doesn't only count going out to restaurants, but also stuff like picking up fast food to bring home, getting a coffee on the way to work, getting a premade sandwich from a grocery store deli during lunch, buying a quick snack from a convenience store or food cart whilst walking somewhere, ordering a pizza or any other food to be delivered to your home, etc.)
*(If you often dine out in groups/as a household: calculate and divide the costs so that you get a Per Person average. This is for YOU individually, NOT the total household/group costs)
(I'm sure polls similar to this have been made before (very common topic), I just haven't personally seen one that I can remember, so, I was curious to do my own! I was discussing this with a group of people today and it was very interesting to see how widely the number varied between individuals. :0c )
(Reblog for bigger sample size if you can, and feel free to explain your answer in tags if there's anything extra to add!)
#polls#tumblr polls#I'm mostly in the 0/1 - 25$ category. Maybe the rare month is a bit over $25 if there's something specific going on like birthday.#Which I'm NEVER eating in an actual restaurant (erm... covid... plus I just hate restaurant environments. i would rather pickup#the food and bring it home to a peaceful quiet environment that I control lol). But more typically like stopping by a grocery store deli#section or something. I don't have coffee that much. And I can't eat fast food much due to my health issues/diet restriction stuff#so if I'm out like coming back from an appointment and I start feeling really sick and weak. I know that a hamburger will just#blow up my system and cause nausea or something. So I try to pick the breadiest most#neutral looking turkey sandwich at the safeway deli to eat during the hour ride home or whatever lol#I actually kind of wish I could do stuff like get food more often vecause it would take the burden of cooking everything off of me#but.. alas... Money... and Health Things... T o T#I still wouldn't do it ALL the time but like... once a week instead of once a month or something.. or maybe turning into a coffee#person.. I do love drinks A LOT .. i am a drink person who will have 5 different drinks sipping on at all times#But i just have to make them all myself mostly lol#And I cant really have too much coffee since it will make me sick. so like.. teas and juice mostly#When I inevitably become a millionaire by never using social media never networking and only finishing one#sculpture every 5 months which I dont even post about or sell - then I shall... get more drinks..#I will somehow wean my body onto coffee and drink one a day solely for the ritual of it#Though even then... I would still probably just like.. buy the mateirals to make it at home or something#Like if you had a million dollars you could just buy a kitchen grade ice cream machine and other stuff to make your own milkshakes and#coffees and smoothies and bubble teas. Genuinely I think even if I were a BILLIONAIRE I would still look at playing likr $8 for a single#coffee and go .. uh.... I could just buy the equipment to make this and then save that money. PLUS. its in my house now so no need to#have to leave. I can make my own drinks in the comfort of home. .. ideal..#Like no matter how rich I ever got I would still have the lingering scroogey stinginess. like i am NOT paying for that. I will jus#make it myself. Especially if it was an Everyday thing. Anythign thats part of my routine I try to optimize and make as efficient as#possible... ANYWAY.. In an IDEAL world I would get treats. but probably not that much. as on a daily basis it would start to get#to me and I would just save up to buy kitchen machinery if I was rich lol
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if anyone is able to help me out i'd appreciate it, im still broke as hell. this month has been really difficult for me. i worked a total of 5 days all month and my bank account is in the negatives again after paying bills and getting some living essentials. i dont know how im going to pay my rent like this. i applied to a financial relief fund from a local trans advocacy group but it's going to be a few weeks until anything comes from that. if you have literally anything to spare it would help me out a lot 😭🙏 i feel bad ive been asking for help so often and i know everyone is struggling, im working on getting my life back in order but everything fucking sucks and is difficult right now :( even just spreading this is a huge help
pp: paypal.me/bewearrr vnm: tobias_leviathan
thank you 💕💕
#im looking for a new job but i dont think its gonna happen any time soon :( my current job is fucking miserable#im working on comms to the best of my ability but i can only draw so fast and i dont want to injure myself and its hard to stay motivated#when ur mental health is tanking so hard#my physical health has been tanking too like stress is getting to me so hard i fucking started a period out of nowhere#i havent menstruated in like 10 years legitimately#im so beyond stressed i have to stop myself from panicking all the time#i have a bunch of work coming up this week but its nowhere near full time#they schedule based 'on performance' when youre part time and since im only here one day a week and they put me at the station i hate--#the most its almost inevitable that theyre using this as a way to get me to not be there. i dont think my boss likes me very much.#bc then they can claim my performance isnt good BECAUSE YOU PUT ME ON THE TASK THAT IVE SAID FROM DAY ONE I DONT WANT TO DO
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the company i work for decided that its switching from the german formal "You"(Sie) to the informal "you" (Du) in all of our websites so now we have to scour the entire database to change it and i quite frankly hate that, not just bc the unecessary extra work but especially bc its such a weird and unecessary change
i bet its bc everything here is getting englishfied (both literally and culturally it feels like, when my new boss talks its half in english bc every second german word is just replaced by an english one despite there being perfectly fine words for it in german too, its so annoying) and bc they want to sound more personal in hopes of getting more clients bc 'company is your fwiend uwu!!', i know this here is the amercian tm site so you wouldnt understand really but i do not want to be greeted with 'du' by companies, no, thats too personal, you dont know me and im not giving you my data, stay away!!
i guess thats how i would describe it .. the formal you is like a polite distance, like someone you dont know staying outside your personal space, but when its the informal 'you' it feels invasive unless i told you you can call me that, and that goes double for companies
maybe its a small thing that doesnt seem important but i cant stand it, im just a little part time worker doing data work so i got no say in it but the companies founder also announced hes giving his post to his kids some time ago so ...... since then theres been alot of changes and new projects that solely aim to imitate whats popular and whats done by other companies, despite ours being one that is, or used to be, intentionally different, like, that was the POINT, but i guess chasing trends is just too appealing for CEOs
#ganondoodles talks#personal#rare personal rant#theres more and more changes that feel so weirdly forced#like man#i thought being different was the whole point#like climate and ethics are .. or were .. the core idea and now i guess its just fine to do whatever conventional companies are doing#yeah woohoo lets also do an app thing that forces people to sign up if they want reasonable prices!#smartphones the standard everwhere!#who needs anything physical if you can put it in an a phone so syphon off data directly out of people fingertips!! yea!!!#lets use AI pitcures bc we refuse to hire more graphic desingers and they are jsut so overworked uwu#climate? ethic? whats that#argh#sorry this needed to get out#recently had a stupid conversation with a coworker bc i asked them why we are okay with AI shit now when it goes against what this-#company was presumably founded on#and he was rly defensive and said welll we dont have time and its cheap and also maybe we should got WITH the time#like that last thing especially pissed me tf off#but i cant afford to lose this job#im starting to hate it more though so the dream of being able to stay like this might not be real#i cant get a job in this place that is as nice to my mental health so idk man#i wish i was good enough at merch and online stuff so i could live of that#but even trying to find out how taxes work on that stuff is a nightmare to me
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#this is so incredibly niche omg im sorry#i was feeling nostalgic about my drarry times#i dont think i ever mentioned why i left the drarry fandom#sorry about that#its a boring story#in 2018 i got quite sick and struggled with my health#one side effect was me not being able to concentrate for longer periods of time#making me unable to read and draw drarry for the first time since i joined the fandom in 2005#when i got better i started slow by watching shows#thats how i got into The Untamed and got sucked into it#since i caj only hyperifxate on one thing at a time i just lost interest in drarry sadly#or maybe i subconciously assocciated it with my health struggles?#anyway this year i stumbled upon a drarry fic rec and coincidentally it was the last fic i read before getting sick#away childish things by lettered#btw#and i never got around to finishing it bc of everything#and i wanted closure maybe so i wanted to reread it#but that kinda led me to remembering why i loved drarry so much#and i miss it#i miss old fandom days on livejournal#sending christmas fandom postcards all around the world#so yeah#i wanted to do something to honor the 2 fandoms in my life that are very dear to me#love u all#sorry for the long story#for such a silly picture#wangxian#mdzs#drarry#the untamed
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"Is it hard to play against Brady [Tkachuk]?" "Yeah! Is it ever? You're talking about one of those killers, right? Okay, let's talk about Brady coming down on ya coming to pick up a puck it's—yeah, yeah. He's uh—he's a big boy, and he has absolutely zero regard for your health and safety." "Nope, dudn't care. Hey, when someone like that though—" "And that's... good for him!" "—but when you... when he's coming down on you, are you like, 'I'm gonna spin off of him' or are you like, 'You know what? I'm gonna dig the puck in the corner and I'm gonna put my shoulder right into his chest, and do a reverse hit.' Like, do you think about both of those? Or just like real quick—like, you know, when you reverse hit a guy—" "Yeah..." "—it fucks him! As a forward, man—you reverse hit me? I'm not hitting you again! 'Cuz now I'm fuckin' scared." "Yeah, yeah, I think... I mean, with him it's so important where the puck is and, you know, with guys that size—like, do you really wanna put your shoulder into him in that moment? Like is that gonna hurt you more than it's gonna hurt him? Potentially? I mean I'm more of, like uh, the 'avoid the hit, grab the puck.' You know, 'try and make a play'... Um, but yeah, I think it depends on the game, time of year, where we are, it's all important."
The Cam & Strick Podcast | 7.30.24 (x)
man who thoroughly enjoys when another man has absolutely zero regard for your health and safety
#aaron ekblad#brady tkachuk#florida panthers#the best quote ive ever heard to describe brady has to be “he's a big boy and he has absolutely zero regard for your health and safety”#particularly the “zero regard for your health and safety”#like yeah. yeahhhhhhh.#love how ekky has spent this whole interview going im not a fighter i feel bad when im too rough and choke out a guy nooooo im not tough >.#and theyre going like so reverse hitting brady yay or nay?#GIRL HAVE YOU NOT BEEN PAYING ATTENTION ABSOLUTELY THE FUCK NOT#do not get me started on ekky calling brady a big boy and his smile as he describes this bashy bambam of a man#“is that gonna hurt you more than it's gonna hurt him? potentially?” hes thought about this so much#how many times has hes just gone “you know with my extensive injury history i kinda dont want to hit a charging raging bull”#make him talk about brady more often this is hilarious#maffhews baby brother scarring all our dmen because of maffhew involving the cats in the tkachuk bowl#its beautiful
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i literally dont think i will ever be able to recreate the highs that the dsmp streams back during its golden era caused inmy life. the energy of the streams and the vibe in the fandom were unmatched. i will literally miss it forever and it really is such a shame that it all ended the way it did because it genuinely influenced me so much and i feel like ill never truly leave it behind
happy november 16th 👍
#not to get sappy and nostalgic but AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#god i miss it so much#i mean mymental health was horrific during those times so it waslike. the only thing bringing mejoy back then#so that influenced me more too#but still like#i dont think ive ever had that much fun in any fandom before#before all the discourse started
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i love expressing myself thru ransom note picture editing so far removed from the original
#talkys#anyway. having tooth issues is hell and i have 2 rn#and i dont have dentallllll 🫶#this is the only reason i do wanna be employed... tooth hurty#ive been relying on the left side of my mouth for chewing for over a month now#health insurance save me....#my dental hygienist bestie moved away the literal month i started having problems now i cant get looked at for free....haaaalp#ok gh ^_^
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writer's block is debilitating atm. i want to write soooooooooo badly but im just sitting here staring at google docs with 0 neuron activation
#also i hate to admit it but ive felt kinda weird writing phanfic lately :/#bc idk. seeing them irl at tit kinda made me think about it too much i guess#plus the revelation that they (or at least phil) lurk and they might see it ldsvlknlsknvlsfn id have to kms#im still debating deleting after the “someone on tumblr will write about that” comment#still trying to convince myself it wasnt about me but i will never know for sure and now i always feel mildly uncomfortable on here :(#maybe im also self sabotaging a bit because i dont really want to finish any of my wips#bc then i should post them. but i dont want to bc what if they flop dslnlnsnvlknvl#i am starting to resent these wips but at the same time theyre still my babies#i always used to think writing was like my Thing. but now im starting to feel like i cant write for shit lmfao#and it's really hard to write if writing just makes you feel stupid#maybe this is just seasonal depression idk#when phil said in his fanfic video rpf is fine as long as you dont cross certain lines#i thought the line was trying to make them aware of it/taking it beyond fan spaces. but now im second guessing everything i write#one of my wips is kinda dark/very angsty and im worried that it gets too deep into mental health stuff#even though it is an alternate timeline au so it's really about 2 fictional characters based on them. but still im worried it's too serious#especially since someone mentioned the bluebird fic recently. i havent read it but now im stressed that my fic is too dark#in a similar way. spoiler alert lmao but this fic was supposed to culminate in dan getting outed by a friend and having a breakdown#but now im wondering if im doing too much and i should just drop this whole idea ugh
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we've had new downstairs neighbors for 2 days and they're already obnoxious. can i get a refund
#if they dont settle down soon im going to disappear. i cant do the annoying neighbors keeping me awake thing again#i could barely handle it when my mental health was relatively fine otherwise#i cant get enough sleep as is. if im kept awake im going to start killing. and im not sure if it'll be the neighbors or myself#hello grace here
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The JD vs Amber Heard stuff was actually insane. I didn't keep up with it because I disagreed with the sheer principle of publicizing something like *that* but the misogyny was MASK OFF...
NO LIKE FRL IT WAS SO INSANE
#ask tag#Tbh like#The thing is i’d already known and been misinformed about the case for a long time prior so I started off thinking depp was innocent#And then I remember when I realized he was very much not partially Bc of the hate I was seeing towards Amber Heard#Like the exposed texts of him saying extremely sexist violent stuff about her and everyone just dismissing that#It became clear that I was wrong from the get-go like that he actually was horrible and I assumed everyone else would realize that too#but then the more ppl dismissed or mocked the real indisputable evidence she brought up#The more I saw that ppl didn’t actually care#They were just excited to be evil and dismissive towards a woman#Lmao sometime after that I stopped giving a fuck about “male mental health” bc clearly they’re not being as shunned as they pretend they r#Sorry is that controversial#I’m just saying if u reversed the genders that trial would’ve played out way differently#The concept of male victims and men with poor mental needing extra attention and care bc theyre sooo marginalized bc they’re men#And they dont get respect and support like those selfish abused women#Should’ve died after this case#Bc whenever there are male victims they get all the support and attention from everyone#Female victims get This#Like dont get me wrong there’s stigma#But the stigma for male victims is “lol you’re like a woman now that’s funny” “lol so r u gay”#The stigma for female victims is “you evil bitch how could you ruin his life you deserved worse you bitch”
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okay. hello guys. my bad for not responding to stuff or being as active recently, had a lot of work to be done and other stuff to focus on that took a lot of my time. I wanted to make more art, but I unfortunately had to put that energy into other things (which got to the point where I could not put them off any longer and had to stay working on it). I know I missed a lot of stuff and I'm sorry for it
#unfortunately there are moments where i am forced back into reality#and i remember that i cannot actually spend my life creating and hiding away forever!!! crazy#honestly a lot of it has also been the fact that i am just tired everytime i get home#and my health issues that have been steadily building up#they're really catching up on me and ive been having to visit the clinic more than im happy with#theres just a constant sense of fatigue nowadays#also uh#admittedly my interesting in Alien Stage has been waning#not replaced by any other media in particular. just started focusing on irl life stuff more often#which is why i barely post on shakingparadigm anymore/dont really post anything of substance#its really mostly this alnst oc thing that makes me want to stay because i genuinely enjoy and adore what we've created here#im pretty invested in this even though im not as invested in the source material anymore#not to say i dont like alnst anymore! i still do. i just don't dedicate all my attention to it anymore#which is for the best actually. because admittedly the things and time i have sacrificed for alnst did create a few consequences#sometimes i forget how bad a hyperfixation can fuck me up#again I'm really sorry for everything I've missed#and for being late to apris birthday#and the solauri round#and more#amazing stuff that you guys have made#me bones just dont work like they used to i fear. please give me time#im.sorry again#sorry this post might seem kind of depressing#just dont mind it if you want#thanks for your time#misc#rant#(?)#vent
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Philosophies of Sumeru
I have to wonder how deliberate were the choices for inspiration in the Sumeru region
The rainforest is mainly inspired by India, followed by Iran. The two countries have common ancestors, so their religious practices had an early shared worship of nature and some of the religious doctrine meets at certain parts.
More importantly, the ancient Persian religion, Zoroastrianism, was founded by Zoroaster —more commonly known by the name of Zarathustra in the book Thus Spoke Zarathustra by Frederick Nietzsche
Zoroastrianism holds monotheistic beliefs in dualistic cosmology of a world at conflict with good and evil, where people have the free will to choose between the two. This influenced the abrahamic religions (Judaism, Christianity, Islam) which largely have shaped society in the west (and beyond by the colonizing hand)
Nietzsche called himself an immoral, as he rejected the traditional values imposed by western religious institutions, his borrowing of Zoroaster's figure was deliberate as he wanted him to be the voice of rejection of the code of morals he originated:
From Ecce Homo by Nietzsche
People have never asked me as they should have done, what the name of Zarathustra precisely meant in my mouth, in the mouth of the first immoralist; for that which distinguishes this Persian from all others in the past is the very fact that he was the exact reverse of an immoralist. Zarathustra was the first to see in the struggle between good and evil the essential wheel in the working of things. The translation of morality into the realm of metaphysics, as force, cause, end-in-itself, is his work. But the very question suggests its own answer. Zarathustra created this most portentous of all errors,—morality; therefore he must be the first to expose it. Not only because he has had longer and greater experience of the subject than any other thinker,—all history is indeed the experimental refutation of the theory of the so-called moral order of things,—but because of the more important fact that Zarathustra was the most truthful of thinkers. In his teaching alone is truthfulness upheld as the highest virtue—that is to say, as the reverse of the cowardice of the "idealist" who takes to his heels at the sight of reality. Zarathustra has more pluck in his body than all other thinkers put together. To tell the truth and to aim straight: that is the first Persian virtue. Have I made myself clear? ... The overcoming of morality by itself, through truthfulness, the moralist's overcoming of himself in his opposite—in me—that is what the name Zarathustra means in my mouth.
Nietzsche developed his ideas at a time where the Enlightenment had disproved many Christian beliefs, hence his declaration that "god is dead", in the face of scientific proof against belief the faith people had in their religion was dying. With this loss of hope also came a loss of meaning, since there was no longer a reassurance in Paradise or an all powerful god behind creation. Nietzsche believed the loss of meaning would lead people into nihilism, an apathetic state in which people let themselves be dominated like a herd.
Nietzsche was initially influenced by Schopenhauer, another philosopher who basically ripped off the Buddhist conception of suffering as an unavoidable truth in the world, and built his westernized ideas from there without following Buddhist teachings themselves. He believed that behind this suffering, humans were motivated by the "will to life" as a survival mechanism. Nietzsche, on the other hand, believed in the "will to power" instead, meaning that life was motivated by the desire to dominate or be dominated.
To combat nihilism, Nietzsche proposed the concept of the "overman", a man who would embrace life for what it is and create his own values to give himself meaning in the universe. These new values would replace those imposed by religious institutions and would lead the herd of people.
Now let's examine the Sumeru chapter under Nietzsche's lens: the god of wisdom, Lord Rukkhadevata, has died. The people of Sumeru have become overly reliant on the Akasha, now containing knowledge manually handled by the political class which doubles as religious caste (the Chinese name of the Akademiya is Sumeru Institute of Religious Decrees). The sages manufacture an artificial "overman" they want to turn into their new god. And in the fairytale where Nahida hid Scaramouche's memories, he threatens:
The resolution, however?
The overman does not succeed.
It fails.
Azar is overthrown and the artificial god is defeated with the collective power of Sumeru citizens. Alhaitham as well, being the closest to an overman in the region, refuses to "lead the herd" to follow his personal values when he resigns as Acting Grand Sage.
Nietzsche's philosophy arrived in India at a time where the nation was under British colonial rule. Among the most prominent figures in anticolonial movements and education, Rabindranath Tagore stands out the most, a polymath who funded his own school where he taught arts alongside science and brought education to rural areas.
Like Nietzsche, Tagore wanted to break from the rigid traditions of religion and build a society with new values. But unlike Nietzsche, his philosophy was based on humanistic values and unity with the world, both nature and community, as he was mostly influenced by Indian religious philosophy, especially the concept of Brahma, a divine universal consciousness that originated everything in existence, therefore, it exists within every part of creation. The story of Apep in Sumeru is somewhat similar.
Another defining difference is their view on Zoroaster/Zarathustra: while Nietzsche is critical of the influence in morality he left, Tagore describes it this way:
All religions of the primitive type try to keep men bound with regulations of external observances. Zarathustra was the greatest of all pioneer prophets who showed the path of freedom to man, the freedom of moral choice, the freedom from the blind obedience to unmeaning injunctions, the freedom from the multiplicity of shrines which draw our worship away from the single minded chastity of devotion.
...Man realizes his divine self in his religion, his God is no longer an outsider to be propitiated for a special concession. The consciousness of God transcends the limitations of race and gathers together all human beings within one spiritual circle of union. Zarathustra was the first prophet who emancipated religion from the exclusive narrowness of the tribal God, the God of a chosen people, and offered to the universal Man.
... Zarathustra was the first who addressed his words to all humanity, regardless of distance of space or time.
For Tagore, a monotheistic doctrine offers a foundation of goodness as an ideal of perfection for all people. That is to say, it seeks the collective well being of a community and reflects the goodness of god on the people that follow him.
The motto of the religion "good thoughts, good words, good deeds", which means that good thoughts lead to good words which lead to good deeds, is echoed in all three versions of the three talent books in Sumeru (admonition, praxis and ingenuity)
He also compares the altruistic acts of self sacrifice to the philosophy of Indian tradition:
The orthodox Persian form of worship in ancient Iran included animal sacrifices and offering of harms to the daevas. That all these should be discontinued by Zarathustra not only shows his courage, but the strength of his realization of the Supreme Being as spirit.
...It has been a matter of supreme satisfaction to me to me to realize that the purification of faith which was the mission of the great teachers in both communities, in Persia and in India, followed a similar line. We have already seen how Zarathustra spiritualized the meaning of sacrifice, which in former days consisted in external ritualism entailing bloodshed. The same thing we find in the Gita, the deeds that are done solely for the sake of self fetter our soul; the disinterested action, performed for the sake of the giving up of the self, is the true sacrifice. For creation itself comes of the self sacrifice of Brahma, which has no other purpose; and therefore, in our performance of the duty which is self sacrificing, we realize the spirit of Brahma.
Where Nietzsche ethical law of will to power calls for men to realize themselves through individualism, making their own values the dominating truth of the rest, Tagore believes in a unity of all, nature, community, god and man to seek their shared and ideal values.
The philosophical ideals of Sumeru, likewise, are met in community, collectivism and altruism. The region never lost their god after all, she was just imprisoned by those with individualistic values and hubris.
I always say that I'm interested in the religious dynamic of the Akademiya as an institution of education. Seeking knowledge is a faith in itself, since their god has her domain in wisdom.
Tagore quotes Dr Geiger on Zoroastrianism as such:
The revelation [Zarathustra] announces is to him no longer a matter of sentiment, no longer a merely undefined presentiment and conception of the Godhead, but a matter of intellect, of spiritual perception and knowledge. This is of great importance, for there are probably not many religions of so high antiquity in which this fundamental doctrine, that religion is a knowledge or a learning, a science of what is true, is so precisely declared as in the tenets of the Gathas. It is the unbelieving that are unknowing; on the contrary, the believing are learned because they have penetrated into this knowledge.
I also find it entertaining that, as we know, ancient Greek philosophers make up the foundations for modern western philosophy like that of Nietzsche's. Ancient Greek philosophers also borrowed from Zoroastrianism in a sort of exotized way, just like their modern western counterparts borrowed from Indian tradition without minding much the credits.
#im not in good health to be able to write an appropriate post but its been on my mind#genshin lore#sumeru#and dont get me started on egoism and altruism in relation to alhaitham and kaveh#genshin analysis#long post
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sometimes i give myself extreme anxiety by remembering random times in my life where my mental health was at all time lows and start freaking out about it happening again. im guessing this is normal?
#personal#like when i was in a weird psychosis for several months thinking I was dead/ in a coma and was making up interactions with people#or when id have panic attacks every night before i fell asleep like no thank you pls#dont even get me started on ptsd flashbacks like that was truly hell inside my brain#or the severe paranoia#or the weird time that i started having night terrors that only happened twice#like mental health is so strange and uncontrollable at times so it freaks me out that those symtoms could randomly happen again#anyway ima take an ativan and chill out now :-)
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i will not stand here and say the quarry's writing is perfect by any means, but man. that moment. in the beginning. when chris absolutely loses his shit and you see every last one of the hacketteers freeze..............shocked, wide-eyed, so taken aback they don't move even to look at each other.............
and then, realizing what just happened, chris scrambles frantically to grab hold of the situation again. he tries to grin at ryan ("tries" being the keyword), he tosses him the keys like nothing's wrong. he tries to go back to being mr. h - he does, he tries so hard - and finally when ryan talks to him, there's what waver in his voice. that absolute lack of understanding in his eyes. ryan's not just surprised, he's not just shocked......for a second there, he is scared, and chris sees that, realizes it, and peels out of there before anyone can say anything else. just.....
JUST............
i think that moment is 100% the moment i realized UH OH I THINK I LOVE CHRIS HACKETT because that's when we see the counselors have been around this guy for two whole months (some of them even longer, possibly), and not once. not once!!!!!!!!!!! had they realized who he really was.
ugh. UGH. i LOVE IT.
#queenie rambles about supermassive#dont even get me started on the flashback with him and travis in the station either#we as the audience like. ONLY see chris at his worst. from the beginning he's grumpy. he's vaguely suspicious. he's screaming into a car.#but the hacketteers SO CLEARLY have not seen him like that. not even once. even when dylan jokes about the sex dungeon...#you know it's tongue in cheek on his part - trying to get a response from ryan#i just. gfdi i know i always end up feeling the most attached to the characters with literally the least screentime of all but i love chris#i really really ReaLLY love the idea of this guy who puts on the happy wholesome corny dad face#only to turn around and be eeeeevery bit as unpleasant as the rest of the family turns out to be#AGAIN! THE SCENE WITH TRAVIS IN THE FUCKING STATION!!!#this is probably just because im replaying tq and getting back into writing#the hacketts#but fuck me. FUCK ME. the thought of mr. h and chris hackett being two very separate characters is just. so. good.#anyway i'm in a totally normal place re: my mental health lately. how about you guys.
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