#does anyone else see it or am i crazy??
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Confession Time
This pisses me off so bad but I unfortunately find Hemlock slightly attractive because he reminds me just enough of Freddy Carter as Kaz Brekker (+ the eyebrow slit) and it annoys me so much
like
fuck all the way off
#i am not proud of this#yeah i have a thing for eyebrow slits too so that doesn't help#like i hate this man to the core of my being#how DARE he be attractive#does anyone else see it or am i crazy??#i think its the hair#star wars#clone force 99#sw tbb#sw tbb s3#tbb#the bad batch#tbb hemlock#kaz brekker#freddy carter
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going INSANE. what is he thinking. why did he say this. why does he do all of this. i am thinking so hard.
we know he's seeking arceus to recreate the world bc in his eyes the world is cruel and unjust and it needs to be destroyed and remade. he's set himself on a mission to create the better reality he's envisioned for his whole life.
but everything else he does. the way he spends his time on pasio making people smile with togepi. even if he justifies it as something purely transactional to get more customers, we know he doesn't really take his merchant job seriously. the way he loves his pokemon so much that they will pop out of their pokeball to excitedly tell whoever will listen how much they love volo back. him trying to capture these moments of happiness tangibly because they never last long and can be wiped away any second.
he still hangs onto hope so much despite what's implied to have happened to him. in spite of all the anger and bitterness that's festered in him, he doesn't really want to destroy everything as he says.
it all started with a wish for the world to be a better place, for the good in the world to outweigh all the cruelty. he's still trying to spread what happiness he can.
but at the same time his past drags behind him and reminds him that he can't afford to trust in the goodness of the world.
that self-assigned mission to usurp arceus's power and rewrite everything.. to him, it's his duty now. he has to do it for himself and, as he rationalizes to himself, for the world.
so he ignores the flaws and holes he finds in his own reasoning. he can't help but seek out the brightness and happiness and goodness that does exist in the world, yet he has to dismiss it to justify his goals.
... all this to try and explain to myself why volo's asking all these questions and making all these comments that seem to go against what we'd expect given his ulterior motive and plans. and it's like he's asking the few friends he has to remember him as the one who seeks joy, even when he does the worst to fulfill his dreams
#am i coherent#can anyone hear me#does anyone else see my vision#does- [i am dragged outside and thrown into the trenches]#pla volo#pla#pokemon#pokemas#.d#realized 10 min later that i used the word âwishâ and am once again getting hit by the celestic-lake guardian trio naming themes so hard#i feel nauseous#volo meaning âwish/wantâ and being a twisted version of azelf's motif of willpower#next to cogita and cynthia's respective roles for uxie and mesprit#never getting over this!!!#i'm crazy i'm CRAZZY#realization even later: can't believe i almost quoted kyubey madoka magica#when the Character makes you go#*kyubey voice*#âEven though you shouldn't have wanted to know the truth you can't help but chase after it. Human curiosity is really illogical.â
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Does anyone else think that the Mushroom Mage looks almost exactly like N'than?
Me rn fr:
#the dragon prince#tdp s6#tdp season 6#tdp spoilers#tdp n'than#tdp mushroom mage#am i crazy#does anyone else see the resemblance!?#giveusthesaga
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#my little brother is engaged :/#donât know if any of you remember me posting about the whole situation like 8 months ago but i feel soo weird#and sad because i want to b happy for him but heâs six yrs older than her and sheâs 19..#or i guess twenty now maybe whatever i feel so aggh. and he moved to a different country so i just feel like iâm never gonna see him again#like i knew this was coming theyâre both super religious so i was like yeah theyâre going to want to get married and have kids fast but.#it just feels crazy. i know thatâs selfish but i have such a bad gut feeling about it that i canât shake#but i canât do anything about it so. idk. i just feel so lonely when things like this happen because i don't have anyone outside of the#family bubble to talk to about it. and obviously everyone else is like super happy for them. and it's not that i don't like her! i just#don't really? know her? at all which feels weird because we are a very close sibling group and i feel like i know & get on with my other#siblings' partners. i think it's partly like i just don't ever hang around people who are under twenty so she feels really young to me#which isn't her fault obviously but. do feel kind of scared for her getting married at twenty so she can start having babies.... idk idk#and obviously on top of that it's my younger brother so it does feel a little salt in the wound that he's moving on with his life and i am#counting it a win these days if i don't want to kms every three minutes#god it just sucks lol and i can't talk about it 2 anyone so i am venting here
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vent
did not expect kissing and realizing iâm lowkey dating a guy to send me down an existential spiral of reminding me that i have only one life to live and then i am going to die without living any other different lives
#but iâve been wasting time not exploring at all!!#doesnât have to be a forever person itâs just an experience#but still#itâs really weird and idk!!!!#and if i date this guy fr i would have to like go on birth control probably and holy shit i do NOT want more medication#and what if i meet someone else?#i donât exactly want to commit yâknow???#but iâm halfway through my twenties and i donât know how much time i actually have and if i think about it too long i hyperventilate#which WOULDNâT HAPPEN if i was just continuing on with being safe and alone!!#and what about women?? i love women!#but when i really love something or someone i go crazy about it#i lose myself#so maybe realistic and neutral is better?#am i neutral?#i donât fucking know and my friends for the most part arenât quite grasping what iâm trying to say#like yes i overthink and yes it might not be that deep to anyone else including the guy#but it NEEDS to be that deep. to me.#because thatâs how my brain fucking works.#i donât take shit lightly and i never have#thatâs why iâm better off alone#or with people who are also deeply unchill#but this guy is so chill! and it does make me feel comfortable!#but itâs also like bro is this conversion therapy am i conversion therapying myself?#my entire identity for more than a decade has been based off being single and independent#and the lapses in that are times in my life that i see myself as unambiguously pathetic and embarassing#with men and women#i feel like a fucking unsocialized semiferal cat that wants affection but also doesnât know how to accept it#and do i even want it? or is it want i know i should want or what would be good for me so im just slowly forcing myself into it?#itâs so much easier. so much simpler. to not have to freak out about this stuff.#sorry for venting i know itâs annoying itâs just fuck manâŚ
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the thing about noaheather is that they're literally an f/f ship to me to the point where i forget that they're not actually canonically an f/f ship
#i'm not kidding my brain literally categorizes them as an f/f ship in my head#every time i see a post about f/f ships i think of them before Remembering agkldsajlfkd#they're literally so yuri coded. to me#does anyone else feel this way. am i crazy.#i mean yes obviously but does anyone else share in the insanity ghlksadjfklds#total drama#td noah#td heather#noaheather#marshy speaks
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âŚ
#like okay I refuse to shit on anyoneâs queer rep parade#and apparently so does everyone else who agrees with me#because I see so many posts about the alleged healthiness of Stede and Edâs relarionship#and I know I am not crazy. nor am I alone in thinking âwhat healthy relationship???â#in the finale they are At Best taking their first solid steps towards a healthy relationship#but they havenât achieved that shit yet. they are actually still the men who didnât talk to each other. who ran away from each other.#you want to hope for the best. but it throws me off when ppl act like what we got was the best#posts like âoh even when he is furious enough to smash a chair into a wall he still wouldnât hurt stedeâ#the scene that reveals that Atede didnât explain anything and Ed didnât allow himself the closure of hearing explanations really should be#NOT considered evidence of healthy relationship#okay Iâm done I just get sick of seeing that gifset with its reblogs saying that and#âoh they did so well balancing the inherent violence of pirates against healthy relationshipsâ#girl WHAT healthy relationship?? thereâs not a single damn person at that dinner table that knows what a healthy relationship is!#(wait. forgot about Buttons)#(I want to ship these two losers but I want to ship it for the cringefail ongoing train wreck it is#not the perfect queer happily-ever-after-SOMEHOW fairy tale that I donât think canon supports)
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I âĽď¸ stalking
my mutuals
tags
#does anyone else click on a tag they see their mutual using a lot and then just scroll and look at all the stuff they posted/reblogged#or am I crazy
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I am doing it I am WRITING the Loscar
#Well as of now I am going to bed (hopefully)#But tomorrow the god forsaken snow should have melted and I can walk to the library to WRITE#Or maybe the magic B&N table#We'll see#also anyone else feeling crazy homesick ahaaaaa or is that just what autumn does to me#I will be getting back into the post basics of bullet journaling as well#Because I have had too many symptoms that I don't fucking know what to do with lately lmao#And it's probably good to have a plan for workouts too. For my fiberglass bones#Good night <333#moss.txt
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ok maybe im just a silly lil tguy but the april calendar photo is just incredibly transmasc to me. i looked at it from a distance and thought phil was wearing a binder for a second but its just the guitar strap blending in w the tank top
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So I was righting a short story about Greek myths hanging out in a bar and I may have accidentally started shipping Talos (the giant robot man) with the monitor (named Asterius because of the video game Haded)? I donât know how or why it happened but it did? And itâs kinda cute?
#does anyone else see the vision? am i crazy#I mean I definitely crazy but#I donât even know how it happened to be honest!#they were just supposed to be friends drinking at a table together and all of a sudden they got really close!#Iâm not even mad to be honest#like theyâre kinda cute in an odd pair kinda way#greek mythology#greek myth retellings#greek myth fanfic#greek myth au#I guess? I donât know how to tag this or even if I should#I just need to talk about how these characters werenât meant to be together but somehow they started meaning a whole lot to me
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i am too mentally exhausted to even deal with this shit anymore with my mom and grandma and low key wish i'd go comatose for a few years to be left alone tbh
#had a clean up service come by to see the damage and give a quote on the estimate and my grandma wasnt having it#she got upset and started crying to them about she has only 1 daughter and is trying to help her and they're trying to tell her that keepin#all that junk isn't gonna be helping anyone especially my mom but she wasn't getting it and i said i'm not helping clean the junk that's#all around the house cuz i'm tired of it all and having to manage my emotions since i am for sure emtotionally stunted from my childhood#and have to deal with a schitzophrenic mom and an absent sister who's balls deep in denial while i'm struggling to find a job here#and my grandma always stressing me ot saying she's gonna kick me out isn't fucking helping here at all like she thinks it does#so when they left she spent all day sobbing on the phone how i'm a terrible granddaughter who wants to throw out good stuff#when i'm not gonna keep helping sell shit for my mom cuz my sister can do it as her family contribution since she did nothing since dad die#and the thing is i gave them all options on clearing shit out cuz i know this family by now and shit doesn't get tossed but it migrates#cuz i said months ago i can ask some friends if they could come down and help sort and declutter#grandma said no to that and said she'll kick me out if i do it and she didn't want to pay for my mom's shit to get moved into a storage uni#she leaves the clean up to my mom and i think the backyard got worse but she didn't call anyone to throw out the junk like she threatened t#so i call a fucking hoarders clean up service cuz that's what my family is on my mom's side at this point and the city will be called too#and she has this reaction cries all day and calls everyone to say i'm horrible and yells at me saying i'm the one killing her with stress#when she's already been doing that for months to herself when i'm just tired and possibly mildly depressed or something idk#i barely leave my room and don't go outside except to walk my dog but idk cuz my family's attittude was we don't go to doctors cuz#cuz they're for crazy people but of course it's gotta switch up for my mom and no one else and i'm just sick of it all#grandma doesn't accept free help and she won't accept help that i pay for myself with my money set aside for school so i'm done#unlike her when i say i'll do something i stick to it so i'm not doing shit anymore unless i can call a friend to help with this mess#it's gonna sound like such a horrible thing but i can't wait for my family to die so i can live in a clean home again and get help#like deep serious help cleaning and big time grief councelling cuz i barely had time to process my dad's death and being the one to find hi#and that was just this february like god i am going to need so much fucking therapy in my future it's almost rediculous#and probably say screw my mom's side and visit my dad's side a lot more since they seem to be the normal ones in this shit family tree#at least they're not stupid and leave junk everywhere where one neighbour getting sick of not being able to sit outside and enjoy their yar#without mountains of junk staring them right in the face and landing a notice from the city to clean up especially since#we have chainlink fences and at least 7 neighbours can see the backyard and everyone can see the front porch when passing by#i'm just tired of living in these suffocating households and even wanna file a report myself to kick them into gear#its horrible living like this and no one should live surrounded by junk and things they never use or even garbage
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ohhh THATS wy its called type o negative
#âšď¸#does anyone else see the resemblance or am i just going crazy#nebula.nova#iwtv#interview with the vampire
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I AM??? SCREAMING WHAT THE HELL
I WAS RIGHT?!?! All those months ago when I came up with my own little crack theory that the Trash Can Man and Creator were related somehow... IT WAS A JOKE WHAT DO YOU MEAN I WAS RIGHT
#tsams#The Sun And Moon Show#this show has been jumping so many sharks#and I am HERE FOR IT#wait didn't Moon see him once? just briefly but he did#I wonder if he would've remembered that if he wasn't#y'know#reset#I wonder if KC would put the pieces together if he was there#ALSO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD#does anyone else recognise that sound effect when the flashback started#I KNOW THAT SOUND but I can't remember where#it's driving me crazy
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i canât be like. completely anti the 1975 bc i do like some of their stuff and also have weird nostalgic teenage feelings wherein i canât separate certain albums from times in my life but i would like the matt healy-ification of other artists to stoooop please why does everyone feel the need to work with him lol
#like i know amber bain is literally signed to dirty hit but why is he everywhere goo awaay#this is insane and crazy but does anyone else feel this weird dyke-y betrayal when your favourite female musicians love to work with your#least favourite men. or just men in general lol#i'm aware this is like. absolute whacko but it is so rare to find artists who are solely focussed on women and trying to write with women &#have women work in the studio etc etc. kind of like how just in general it is so lonely to want to see men completely decentred from#everything as a lesbian and never actually getting to see that. idk it's stupid to be mad about it but i am anyway lol
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one of my favorite art pieces i own i literally pulled out of a trashcan so like even if you think it's garbage someone out there will love it. i love it
#me looking at what was probably some kids art project their parent didn't appreciate enough laying on top of some garbage:#whaough does anyone else see that botw dragon in this. am i crazy. im taking this home#đż
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