#am i coherent

[dittydipity]

going INSANE. what is he thinking. why did he say this. why does he do all of this. i am thinking so hard.

we know he's seeking arceus to recreate the world bc in his eyes the world is cruel and unjust and it needs to be destroyed and remade. he's set himself on a mission to create the better reality he's envisioned for his whole life.

but everything else he does. the way he spends his time on pasio making people smile with togepi. even if he justifies it as something purely transactional to get more customers, we know he doesn't really take his merchant job seriously. the way he loves his pokemon so much that they will pop out of their pokeball to excitedly tell whoever will listen how much they love volo back. him trying to capture these moments of happiness tangibly because they never last long and can be wiped away any second.

he still hangs onto hope so much despite what's implied to have happened to him. in spite of all the anger and bitterness that's festered in him, he doesn't really want to destroy everything as he says.

it all started with a wish for the world to be a better place, for the good in the world to outweigh all the cruelty. he's still trying to spread what happiness he can.

but at the same time his past drags behind him and reminds him that he can't afford to trust in the goodness of the world.

that self-assigned mission to usurp arceus's power and rewrite everything.. to him, it's his duty now. he has to do it for himself and, as he rationalizes to himself, for the world.

so he ignores the flaws and holes he finds in his own reasoning. he can't help but seek out the brightness and happiness and goodness that does exist in the world, yet he has to dismiss it to justify his goals.

... all this to try and explain to myself why volo's asking all these questions and making all these comments that seem to go against what we'd expect given his ulterior motive and plans. and it's like he's asking the few friends he has to remember him as the one who seeks joy, even when he does the worst to fulfill his dreams

[the-gayest-tree-you-ever-did-see]

guilty as sin? -> carolina "sleep in a liar's bed." or dare i say 1989

[midnightcowboy1969]

It’s really interesting how much of a costume Joe’s cowboy persona is. He’s not a forreal cowboy but he’s one helluva stud. It’s a getup. His old boss called it that. In the flashbacks you notice that Joe was not dressed like that even if he was influenced by cowboy movies and his grandma’s boyfriend. In New York Joe watches a tv program all :( about a dog that’s dressed up and laughed at. Does he feel like that dog? By the end he throws his clothes away and he’s from New York from here on. Being a cowboy was an escape from his old self and trauma. It was a way to regain his masculinity after the assault. He threw it away by the end because now he’s healing etc etc

[molotovgrifter]

LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE

[jaybirdscoffee]

forever thinking about D-16’s “I want to kill him.” monologue. that initial line hit so hard. it was a line that made me think There He Is. because, yeah, that’s the megatron we know. that’s the megatron that worked in the mines, and when cybertron’s government turned its back on him, his rage won out. he devoted his life to something for nothing, for a world that didn’t give a damn about him. the story may have changed, but the essence of his origin is still there.

[egophiliac]

buckle up lads we're going BACK INTO THE BOOK

[thekaiserroll]

Hug

It's nearly impossible to have a quiet and peaceful day with the crew, like the strawhats. Nami is mostly used to the noise on Going Merry but one day she gets fed up with Zoro and Sanji arguing. Not only are they extremely loud, but they've also already broken way too many things during their fights.

She decides that If they want to act like brats, then she's going to treat them as such. So she makes them apologize and hug each other in silence for an hour. None of them are happy about this punishment, but Nami threatened to raise Zoro's debt, and Sanji couldn't say no to her. It could be worse.

It's awkward enough for them to not incite any fight for a long time and Nami is quite proud of herself. She knows it won't last forever but at least now she knows how to handle them. It inevitably happens again. And again. And again.

Much to her surprise, those fights became more and more frequent. And what's even weirder is that she could see the way both Zoro and Sanji occasionally glanced at her to make sure she was nearby. It's almost as if they wanted someone to make them hug each other. As if they needed an excuse.... these idiots.

Soon, they don't even need Nami's help. When they aren't busy training, cooking or fighting, they cuddle together. Sometimes Luffy or Chopper would join them, but most of the crew knew it was their time.

After two years spent separately, they became extremely clingy. It's no surprise when they start sleeping in the same bed. What is surprising is that despite them behaving like a lovey-dovey couple, those oblivious idiots are STILL unaware of each other's feelings.

[meatgrinder-0]

[panstarry]

my final from last semester that i made into a zine. cooked this one up in a couple hours before the critique (the ink was still wet!), so it's very raw and kind of sloppy but the sentiment is there. i love you trans people of color. we are the backbone of this community 🌟

[hinamie]

itafushi nation how r we Feeling!!!!!!!!!!!

[darkmuffinstudios]

The struggle for sleep is super hard sometimes

[feelo-fick]

i thought the reason was obvious..??

but you dont seem to get the implication so i guess ill just keep talking and you can listen if you want to

—

that one meme but its them :] sort of a sequel to this

[acediscowlng]

thinking about how both edwin and charles refer to edwin getting sent to hell as a technicality or a clerical error and like. it's not. that's not what happened. edwin was sacrificed. hell had a mechanism for accepting innocent souls. edwin ending up in hell wasn't a loophole or a mistake someone made along the way. it was a system that was working exactly the way it was intended.

and thinking about the idea of hell and the idea of forgiveness and the idea that you only stay in hell if you feel like you belong there. and how edwin says that he was never meant to be in hell to begin with but still building up a case for himself to prove it because him not deserving hell might not be immediately obvious

thinking about how edwin died because of a hate crime, how he died being made to feel that there is something fundamentally wrong with him and getting sent to hell right after. and thinking about how edwin saying "if you punish yourself, everywhere becomes hell" and over a century of repression and supressing the parts of himself that got him killed, that got him sent to hell in the first place. and thinking about how when the night nurse looked at edwin's file, it didn't know if he belonged in hell or somewhere else either because edwin didn't know because edwin knows that he never did anything to deserve hell but he didn't get sent to hell because of anything he did but because of what he is and maybe there's a difference and maybe he believes that he never did anything wrong but maybe some part of him believes that he, personally, is wrong

and thinking about forgiveness and salvation and how people actually get out of hell, and how edwin forgave simon because they were two queer kids in the same shitty situation both in life and in death and it didn't matter how simon hurt edwin because he still needed to understand that being gay was not a punishment, and thinking about simon getting out of hell right after

and thinking about edwin confessing his love for charles on the steps of hell and getting to leave right after and how hell is something you make for yourself and how edwin escaped the first time but he never forgave himself for what he is and not something hecdid maybe hell still had a hold on him after all those years and it wasn't until he let himself be honest about it and be gay and love boys and allowed himself to actively choose to be the person he is and deciding that that person is someone who is allowed to feel and love and that that kind of love was not a punishment and thinking about how edwin escaped hell by not just allowing himself to love but leaving behind all the ways he was punishing himself for it

[bluebells-and-dragonflies]

Imagine Astarion with ears so sensitive that he's never willingly allowed anyone to touch them except for you. Imagine laying next to him in your bed, facing him, lifting your hand up slowly for that first touch. His eyes on yours, the rapidity of the breath he doesn't need to take, but still does reflexively. Seeing that he's nervous, but that he's trusting you, feeling his shaking hand come to rest on your waist. The audible sound he makes- half a moan, half a gasp- when you finally brush your thumb over the soft skin at the tip of his ear.

You trace the long shell of his ear and watch his pretty eyes, deep red like velvet in the moonlight, flutter shut. He says your name softly, as close as you've ever heard him to prayer. You pinch his earlobe gently, and his hips roll forward involuntarily, the jut of his hipbone pressing against your thigh as he makes himself still. Heat flares low in your belly, but you tamp it down as quickly as possible- likewise, Astarion makes himself still against you. This isn't sex and won't become sex, you'd promised each other (though that's not to say that you won't explore this thoroughly during one of your hours-long lovemaking sessions. He is all about experimentation these days, after all).

You lay there, touching him in his most vulnerable place, with reverence and grace and occasionally disbelief that you could be here at all with this beautiful, horrible, ridiculous and wonderful man, that you could be trusted so completely. You take in his every shuddering breath, the flexing of his fingers in your shirt, the softness of his mouth when he presses his lips to yours and tells you he loves you. If you have your way, if he has his, if somehow your utterly insane lives hold together for a year or a decade or ten, it will always be like this.

[filipineapple]

the tanning bed partially resurrecting the creature everytime he used it so he could be more alive for lisa. her offing herself in it so she could be with the creature for eternity. the bed shaped like a coffin symbolizing the dual nature of death. i love this movie so much you don't understand.

[deadpoets]

SOLDIER, POET, KING by The Oh Hellos