#damian wayne’s pets

[arkangelo-7]

Bruce Wayne seems like the type of person who would actively complain about having pets in the house but simultaneously takes the dogs for walks every morning and lets Alfred the Cat sleep on his lap and brush Batcow and generally love the shit out of his four legged friends. But when asked he will deny.

[damnianalghulnotwayne]

give damian more scary pets. not in a goliath or squiggles way but in a rat/beetle/giant spider/ possum way. they scare the SHIT outta his family and he has no clue y. he found them in a dumpster and they r now his bestie and he’ll never let them go (no matter how much his family WISHES he would-)

[peacefulofskye]

I love the art

Damian gets a pet peafowl for his birthday (sent by his mom so it's also a ninja peafowl)

Damian has two choices here (okay three but where's the fun in that) Either name the bird 'Peaman' or 'Batcock'

Peaman the Batcock and Jerry the turkey become gay bird lovers

--

Bruce: "I'm gonna have to veto the Batcock part of this pet's name" Damian: "Coward" Jason: "Hypocrite" Bruce: "How???" Jason: "You let Dick go by 'Dick'"

-

Steph: "Would you rather Damian name him 'Batpea the Mancock'?" Duke: "Or 'Peabat the Cockman'?" Bruce: "Stop"

-

Dick: "I would like to propose the peacock be named 'Soup,' cause I thought that's what we were talking about." Damian: "No, it's too late. This is Batcock the Peaman." Alfred: "I think 'Soup' is an excellent name for a peacock." Dick: "Thank you, Alfred"

--

Damian: "Everyone, I have someone to introduce you to; This is Soup the Peahen." Tim: "Where did he get another peacock??" Cass: "Found it by Robinson Park. Took it home, said it's his now." Steph: "Yeah that checks"

-- Soup is a lesbian

[avensartt]

Quote from Scrubs

[theaceofarrows]

Damian: [walks into Bruce's office with his hands behind his back]

Damian: Father, I would like to congratulate you. You are now a grandfather

Bruce: [seconds away from a heart attack] W- what?

Damian: [reveals the hamster he was holding behind his back] Meet Ferdinand

Bruce: [slumps against desk] Next time... please- please lead with that... I'm begging you

-

Jason: [hiding in the vents with a camera] He actually did it, the crazy little son of a bitch

[heylosers06]

Doodles and redraws of my son! And also Talia because I love her so much ❤️

I also love the maya and Damian panel redraw I think it’s my favorite

[incorrectbatfam]

Damian and the pets reaction to finding Alfred the cat with illegal catnip?

[in the barn]

Alfred the cat: *drags a pouch in*

Bat-Cow: What is that?

Alfred: Catnip. It's medicinal.

Titus, opening the bag: Why is it glowing?

Alfred: Those are the medicinal properties.

Ace: Have you been seeing Dex-Starr again? I told you, that cat is bad news.

Haley: Who's Dex-Starr?

Alfred: Not relevant. Just help me hide it before our human sees.

Bat-Cow: How about inside the haystack?

Ace: No, it's from a Red Lantern. It could catch fire. Under the floorboards, perhaps.

Alfred: Absolutely not. I was instructed to keep it away from damp environments.

Haley: Why does it matter? Doesn't Damian let you have catnip?

Alfred: Catnip is fine. Damian doesn't want me being around Dex-Starr.

Haley: Why?

Alfred: It's complicated. Are you gonna help or not?

Titus: I know, Goliath! We can hide it under his bedding.

Alfred: Great idea.

Jerry: *squawks*

Alfred: That's Jerry's signal. Damian's coming. Act natural.

Damian, entering: I thought I would find you here. Titus, your bath has been drawn.

Damian: *looks around*

Damian: What's going on?

Alfred: Uh... meow?

Damian: *shrugs and leaves with Titus*

Alfred: Phew, that was a close one. Remember, guys. What happens in the barn, stays in the barn.

[meanwhile in Metropolis]

Krypto, who was listening: Adding that to the blackmail file.

Jon: What is it, boy?

Krypto: Uh... bark?

Jon: *shrugs and goes back to texting Damian*

[robinsfilm]

FURRY NEW BEGGINGS

PAIRING : jason todd ✗ gn!reader.

SYNOPSIS : In which the cat distribution system catches up to you and Jason.

WARNINGS : no serious warnings, just alot of fluff and a short lived (or not) rivalry between the cat and jaybeans.

WORD COUNT : 1k.

NOTES : switching up the theme a bit, can't always find those pretty headers. wE NEED A NAME FOR THE CAT!!!

navigation ; masterlist.

The first time he saw the cat, Jason was returning home from patrol. The rain was pouring down in streets, and he hurried through the storm, eager to get back to you as quickly as possible. The weather made everything difficult—the buildings blurred together, neon signs became unreadable, and the sounds of the city were muffled through his helmet.

But despite the downpour, he didn't miss the small spot of light orange in the corner of his eye. It stood out against the dark, murky colors of the alley it was huddled in. Nestled in a small, soggy cardboard box between two trash bags, something shifted.

What's that?

Jason knew he needed to get home. He was freezing and bone-tired, but his curiosity got the better of him.

What's the worst that could happen?

Turns out, the worst that could happen is making a new, vicious enemy out of a stray cat.

Jason landed swiftly in the dark alley, the shadows swallowing up what little light there was. He approached the cardboard box cautiously and gently lifted the lid, unsure of what he might find inside.

The first thing that caught his attention was a pair of greenish-brown eyes staring back at him, followed by the sight of ginger-striped fur. The creature let out a small, plaintive mewl.

Oh, it’s a cat.

In the box sat a big, angry orange tabby. A very angry orange tabby, actually. The cat gave him a fixed, piercing stare, its fur and tail puffing up as it let out a throaty, warning meow.

Jason instinctively raised his hands, palms open, to show he meant no harm, but it was too late—the cat swiped at him with a paw, claws fully extended!

"Alright, I got the hint! No need for violence, little guy. Well—not so little. I mean, just look at you." Jason chuckled softly, trying to diffuse the tension.

The cat's ears swiveled backward and flattened against its head, its body puffing up even more as it attempted to make itself look bigger, more intimidating.

"Okay, okay. I’ll leave you to... whatever you’re doing."

*****

The second time he saw the cat was when he was with you, just returning from a grocery run.

"Who even says that to a worker? It's not like they set the prices," you huffed, recounting an incident at the 7/11 you both had just visited. An old lady had been loudly complaining about the cost of a few products, taking it out on the poor cashier behind the counter.

"I know, baby, but you put her in her place." Jason wrapped his arm around you, pulling you closer. "So, don't worry about it anymore."

"You're right, it's just—" Jason’s ear tuned out your next words as a familiar spot of light orange caught his eye. A pair of greenish-brown eyes glared at him menacingly.

No way... it can't be the same cat...

"Honey? Jay? What's wrong?" you asked, turning to him, trying to catch his attention.

"Huh? Oh, yeah? Sorry," Jason replied, snapping back to reality with a smile. "Something just caught my eye." But when he turned to look again, the cat was already gone.

Annoying little bastard...

"What did?" you inquired, glancing around to spot whatever had distracted him.

"An orange tabby cat that I’ve apparently started a rivalry with." Jason deadpanned.

"You started a what with a what..?" you stammered, clearly confused by his response. But Jason just grabbed your hand and quickly led you away.

*****

The third time he saw the cat was in his apartment. In his goddamn home.

Jason dropped the bag of snacks he’d just bought from the corner shop out of sheer shock. How did the cat find him? Had it followed him? Was this how it spotted him last time near the grocery store? What was this cat’s plan?

Just then, you rounded the corner, emerging from the kitchen with a small bowl of wet cat food in your hands.

Your face lit up when you saw him. "Welcome back!"

"Hi, baby. Who’s this?" Jason pointed to the cat, now holding its tail high with a slight curl at the top. The cat purred softly as it rubbed its head against Jason’s boot.

"Awh! Look, he likes you!" You beamed, your face lighting up with a smile. "Is this the tabby you were talking about? I can’t imagine him being evil at all, isn’t that right?" You squealed with delight, setting the bowl down near the cat.

The cat slowly blinked at you before cautiously approaching the bowl and taking a tentative bite of the food.

Jason tried to ask how the cat got in, where you found it, and why you let it in, but you shushed him.

"Did you just shush me?" he muttered in disbelief, half-laughing.

"I think it’s fate!" you exclaimed. "You found him, he found you, and now he’s here! He belongs with us. Please, Jay, can we keep him?"

Now that was something he never thought he’d hear. Usually, it was Damian asking Bruce to keep some random animal he’d found—not as a pet, of course. Oh no, not at all.

Jason stared at the tabby for a few moments, then at you, with your big smile and pleading eyes staring back at him.

Crap, this is hard. No wonder Bruce never says no to whatever Damian drags into the house. Jason still remembers the cow...

"...Fine."

"Yay!" You celebrated with a little hop.

"How did it even find us?" Jason eyed the cat suspiciously.

"I’m not sure. But you’ve got to get used to him. I think he likes you!" you said as the cat wobbled back over and rubbed its head against Jason’s boot again. "See? Isn’t he adorable?"

Jason sighed softly, then gave you both a small, reluctant smile. "Yeah, he’s a little bit cute, I guess."

"Oh, I almost forgot! We need to name him."

Jason grumbled under his breath. This was going to be a long week—but maybe, just maybe, it might be a tad bit happier than the previous ones.

© ROBINSFILM ﹕ I do not give consent for my writing to be posted or used on any other platforms without my permission and proper credit.

[spicy-apple-pie]

shhhh... they eepy

(Damian has tried on multiple occasions to sneak in batcow, but was ultimately unsuccessful...)

[gffa]

DAMIAN BEING SO OPENLY VULNERABLE WITH HIS PETS, HIS TOUCH ON THEM SO GENTLE, IS EVERYTHING TO ME.

[arkangelo-7]

I’m sure someone’s already headcannoned this, but Bruce having pet names for the Batkids? Man, those are his babies—you can bet your ass he has pet names for them. He might not be the type of man to show much affection beyond a shoulder pat or the occasional forehead kiss, but he’s determined to parent the crap outta these orphans, and pet names are an easier medium to show that he cares.

Dick is both “chum” and “sweetheart” depending on the context. When Bruce is feeling playful and comfortable (the easy, “your mine and I’m just happy to be here with you” kind of love), he’ll stick with “chum” and Dick absolutely loves it. But when Dick’s sick or has a nightmare or got injured during patrol? It’s sweetheart. It’s default mode for Bruce, because seeing Dick in pain brings up so many raw, intense emotions (Bruce gets scared, goddamit) that it’s easier for him to say “I’ve got you, sweetheart, it’s okay, just keep your eyes on mine,” then it is to say “I’m so terrified that I’m going to loose you, I love you, you’re my everything.”

Jason is“Jaylad.” But it’s less of the name that’s important and more of the story behind it that is. For the first few months that Jason was in Bruce’s care, Bruce didn’t dare call him anything other then his name, in fear that he’d scare him away (he was already so distrusting, so hesitant, so fearful whenever Bruce talked to loud or moved to fast or got upset), but at the same time, he’d seen how pleased Dick had been at being called “chum” and wanted to bestow a similar endearment on Jason. But—he didn’t want to go to far. So instead of calling him “lad” like his own father had once called him, Bruce calls him “Jaylad.” It’s a little more impersonal, but it makes Jason more comfortable. (But when Bruce cradled his son’s broken body he said “no, darling, not you, don’t leave me—” because just how Dick is “sweetheart,” Jason has also always been “darling.”)

For Tim… it’s more complicated. He shoved his way into Bruce’s life and he’s forever grateful, but it wasn’t the same as it was with Jason and Dick. He sees Tim as his son, of course, but their relationship was built on the darkest, most despairing part of Bruce’s life. But even in that terrible season, Bruce would look over at Tim working on a case or cleaning his suit and say, “Good job, sport.” It doesn’t happen often, but Tim is “sport.”

Cassandra is “love.” Bruce has never said it to her, aloud, but he knows Cass can read him well enough to hear the unspoken endearment, to see how much he longs to protect her, bring her joy, fill her heart with all the love she’s filled his with.

Steph is “duck.” And not necessarily because Bruce decided that it was, but because 9 times out of 10 he finds himself screaming, “Robin, get down!” because Stephanie will not for the love of God follow his orders, and end up right in the line of fire. To save time he eventually just started saying “Duck!” It keeps Steph from getting whacked to high heavens and saves Bruce (another) heart attack, but over the years it’s also become somewhat of a ritual to say “duck” whenever Steph walks in the room. Bruce secretly wants to call her “ducky” (which is what his mother called Kate), but he’s never worked up the nerve.

Duke is “kid.” By the time he’s in the family, Bruce has loosened up and lightened up, especially with everyday affection (which is to say, he’s not avoiding it like the plague). He’s quick to say “Good job, kid” whenever Duke had an accomplishment or ask “how are you today, kiddo?” when they see each other in passing in the Batcave.

Damian, lastly, would never allow Bruce to call him anything other then his name. But every once in a while, Bruce can get away with saying “son.” And it’s the best thing in the world.

[chaparro0456]

Tim: So are we going to talk about the elephant in the room

Damian stole a full grown elephant from the zoo 

Damian: His name is Dumbo if we’re going to talk about

Bruce: Damian you have returned the elephant

Damian : HIS NAME IS DUMBO AND IM GOING TO TRAIN HIM TO FLY AND RIDE INTO BATTLES !

Dumbo does a war cry !

Damian: he has a heart of a warrior!

Jason: I blame dick for this

Dick: why me ?!

Jason: You’re the one that keeps showing him Disney movies

Dick: Sorry for trying to give a regular children movies and not the Braveheart movie

Jason: It’s a good movie !

Bruce : Damian you can’t keep dumbo

Damian: you may take my life but never take my freedom!

[kitkats-and-kittens]

Damian loves all animals.

ALL animals.

This is cute and funny when his siblings catch him playing fetch with Titus or snuggling on the couch with Alfred the cat.

It’s not so cute and funny when they find the big-as-fuck dragon bat that he found when he was like 7 and just claimed as his?!?!

Like how do you just get a dragon bat?

It’s even less funny when they find out about the actual 20ft dragon he decided to adopt and name fucking Wiggles. Like you can sit on that things nose. It towers over you?!? It could quite literally consume all 5 feet of you in one bite and you named it Wiggles?!?!

It’s even worse when they realise all animals includes bugs.

Idk Damian just gives of obssssed with bug vibes.

Like he owns several habitats filled with ants. Probably a giant ass spider that gets loose one day and causes a whole ass lockdown since Damian is the only one anyone trusts to not get eaten by it.

They can’t do missions in any sort of area that could potentially be the habitat of any kind of wild life without locking him down and preventing him from picking up some feral beast because it was quote on quote ‘friend shaped’.

The indomitable human spirit is just Damian’s ability to adopt the most unadoptable creatures on the planet. Honestly probably off the planet as well. God forbid that child ever finds some vaguely lonely space alien dog that seems to have zero friends in site cause it’s coming home with him.

Ik Alfred is tried.

[batfam-stuff-posts-0]

Damian: *hiding something in his coat* We should adopt another child.

Jon: No.

Damian: Why not?

Jon: Because when you say 'child' you mean 'cat' and we already have fifteen of those.

Damian: *unzips coat* Sixteen.

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny thinks he's done a wonderful job all things considered. His city is safe, no one has died yet, no major injuries, Vlad had screwed off after Danny beat him within an inch of his afterlife (Danny learned that Vlad was a revenant abusing dirty ectoplasm for powers-not a halfa), ect.

Most of his rogues gallery also stopped bothering him once it became clear he was having trouble keeping his increased power in check and was trying hard not to hurt them. Unfortunately there was one who refused to leave him alone. A warrior princess was demanding his hand in marriage as she needed to be married by the summer solstice of next year or the throne would be passed down to her younger sister, who was already married.

It didn't matter how many times he said no, she kept coming back and challenging him for his hand. Each time she came back stronger and with new tactics and weapons to try. He was starting to fear she might actually win one day. That day might be sooner rather than later as her latest scheme was cutting it close.

Deciding that 1. Amity didn't need him anymore if he closed the portals 2. He was probably going to have to leave anyway if he loses and 3. He didn't have a future in this world as Fenton anymore he leads her on a wild goose chase back into the GZ and causes the portals to collapse in on themselves. The princess laughs, thinking he had given up. But no.

Danny put a curse on himself to turn him into a bat for the next year or so, a full month longer than the princess had left to find a spouse. She screams. Appearently she had a phobia of bats, who knew? Anyway he was left alone to fly through the Infinite Realms and find a new home.

He found a new world easily thanks to the natural portals of the IR and crossed though. Immediately being pelted on all sides by freezing cold rain was not what he expected but its what he got as he flew over a sign that proclaimed the city beneath him was called Gotham. The little glowing white bat flew through the night for hours before seeing a fruit bowl laying innocently on a kitchen counter through a window. Whats more it was in some giant manor so the occupants probably wouldn't mind if he ate an orange or two.

Right?

Needless to say a kid around the age of 11 or twelve walked in on him clutching an apple like his life depended on it while furiously munching. The kid looked...excited? He started going on about names and what he would need to care for him. Danny wasn't really listening, he didn't realize how hungry he had been until he started eating. He waited until the kid had looked away to turn himself and his apple invisible. This bothered the kid who looked suspicious but went to look for "the bat" anyway.

Later, while Danny was taking a shower in the kitchen sink to wash off the remains of his meal (I headcanon that Danny is a bit of a neat-freak) some other guy walked in holding an empty coffee mug and wearing eyebags that would put a raccoon to shame. They just stared at eachother for a solid few seconds before Danny started squeeking in rage and covering himself with the washcloth he was using to scrub himself clean. It looked like something out of a cartoon. Tim thought he was hallucinating but why would he hallucinate a glowing white bat with hearts all around it (that part isn't real) taking a shower in the kitchen sink. Was his subconscious trying to tell him something??

The next victim person to spot him was Duke who just stood in his doorway as this glowing white bat rolled an orange down the hallway. He decided this was a problem for the night crew and went to tell them.

Alfred saw a small shock of white fur and heard squeeking. His first thought was 'rat' and he didn't even hesitate. Danny dodged 3 bullets and got the hell out of the kitchen.

The batfam are debating on whether this was a shifter or an meta animal that was experimented on.

[heylosers06]

The best thing I’ve ever done ngl it’s so funny

I totally need to draw wiggles next