#calvin and hobbes quote

[claypigeonpottery]

never added the final line to one of these mugs before, but I felt it was time for weird bugs

[incorrectbatfam]

Tim: Your polls are slipping, Bruce.

Duke: Better get with it.

Bruce: Kids, being your dad isn’t an elected position. I don’t have to respond to polls.

Cassandra: ?

Damian: Not elected?

Dick: You mean you can govern with dictatorial impunity?

Bruce: Exactly.

Jason: In short, open revolt and exile is the only hope for change?

Bruce: I don’t like the direction this conversation is taking.

[calvinandhobbescomic]

[wolfer13579]

Alastor: Darling, do you love me?

Lucifer: Of course I do!

Alastor: Would you still love me if I did something bad?

Lucifer: Well, of course I… would…

Alastor: I mean something really, really—

Lucifer: Alastor, what did you do?

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

Rose: Mom, can I have some money to buy a Satan-worshipping, suicide-advocating heavy metal album?

Mom: Rose, the fact that these bands haven’t killed themselves yet in ritual self-sacrifice shows that they’re just in it for the money like everyone else. If you want to shock and provoke, be sincere about it.

Rose: Mainstream commercial nihilism can’t be trusted?

Mom: ‘Fraid not, kiddo.

Rose: Childhood is so disillusioning.

[adekalyn]

*Professor McGonagall reading a note Sirius handed her*

Professor McGonagall: “Please excuse Sirius from class today. His genius is urgently required on a top secret matter of national security. Sincerely, the Minister for Magic of Great Britain. P.S. Really.”

Professor McGonagall: Nice try. Sit down.

Sirius, at his desk: I gotta learn how to write in cursive.

Remus: Yes. That was the problem.

[aotearoa20]

Maedhros: What are you doing

Lil' Elrond: Looking for frogs.

Maedhros: How come?

Lil' Elros: Gotta obey the inscrutable exhortations of our souls

Maedhros: (flashbacks to several brothers tracking mud into the house after hours)

Maedhros: Ah, but of course.

Lil' Elrond: Our mandate also includes weird bugs.

[incorrect-bhaalspawn-quotes]

Astarion: I'm in a very crabby mood today, so everybody just leave me alone! I hate everyone!

Astarion: ...

Astarion: No one ever recognizes my hints to smother me with affection.

[magnetarbeam]

Mara Jade: So this one is called the 19 BBY Overture.

Ben Skywalker: I kinda like it. Interesting percussion section.

Mara Jade: Those are turbolasers.

Ben Skywalker: And they play this in crowded concert halls? Gee, I thought classical music was boring!

[claypigeonpottery]

I gotta say, this is one of my favourite mugs. the green might turn out more black than expected, it was a mix of a few things and ...who knows. I can't wait for this to get out of the kiln

[goodomensbutwrong]

Aziraphale: Hey Crowley, remember the Bentley?

Crowley: Yeah, angel, of course.

Crowley:

Crowley: Wait a minute. What do you mean “remember"?

[incorrectbatfam]

Dick: The days are getting colder.

Bruce: Yes.

Dick: BUGS ARE DYING BY THE TRUCKLOAD! HA HA HA! GOOD RIDDANCE TO THEM ALL!

Dick: I like fall.

[calvinandhobbescomic]

"Calvin's Most Unhinged Statements" (A Collection)

[the-black-bulls]

Luck: Hey captain, what time is it?

Yami: Go look at a clock and see.

(later)

Luck: What's the weather like today?

Yami: Go outside and check.

(later)

Luck: How strong are you?

Yami: Go—

Yami: ...Nice try.

Luck: Dammit!

[danganronpafakes]

Toko: So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they're already met? Komaru: Right. We should take pride in our mediocrity.

Source: Calvin and Hobbes

[adekalyn]

*Fred and George going to Percy’s room*

George: Percy? Are you busy?

Percy: Well, sort of. Why?

Fred: Oh. Nothing. We were just thinking, maybe, if you had the time, we could all do a brother bonding kind of project. You know, just you and us.

Percy: Of course we can. That’s more important than this. Sure, what would you like to do?

George: You’re old enough to buy firearms and explosives, right?