#c: arthur brown

[bee-a-garbage-shipper]

god yes both of these.

so duke ends up in his parents hospital room (they're kinda like the longbottoms from harry potter bc of joker gas/venom)

babs does show up in the police station since she became batgirl to clean up dirty cops in a way her father couldn't

i feel like cass ends up in the batcave bc she has the goal to be the next batman

also alfred ends up at thomas' and martha's grave bc 1 he's not dead and 2 he's attached to gotham bc of his partners

damian i think would end up either with dick who was the one to teach him the hows and whys to be a hero or batcow bc that was the first moment he really wanted to save someone/something and not be robin for the mantle

and while dick may have put on the robin name for his parents he didn't become a gotham hero until later

he wanted to help ppl true but he wasn't attached to gotham until bruce

bc bruce showed him the beauty of gotham and made dick want to do right by gotham

and dick may have left but he always comes back and while he does eventually get attached to other people like his brothers jason, tim, damian and duke, or his sister cass, and even babs and steph,

but when he comes back to gotham it's for bruce

dick is bruce's partner and almost no one understands him as well as bruce but bruce is entirely obvious to how important he is to dick and is to busy fearing that because of the time dick spends at blüdhaven he won't come back

he so relieved when dick appears in his lap and takes a kiss for of years of repression on both sides (and bruce hoping to avoid ever actually talking about his feelings)

and you are so right @stubbornandgreen tim is so unwell about jason

he's been following jason's footsteps and standing in jason's shadow for years he's just better at hiding his feelings then other (dick and bruce) ppl

honestly both couples would dance around each other right up until it's shoved into both parties faces what the other feels

also poor jason is pissed about tim and taking all his anger out on criminals so imagine everyone's surprise when red robin appears out of no where

someone takes a pic of red hood throwing red robin over his shoulder like a snake of potato

unfortunately for tim unlike bruce jason will make him talk about his feelings instead of just ravishing him

ok so

general idea of the batfam being an extension of gotham’s will so they can’t leave the city without taking a piece of it with them

so when they respawn they do so at the reason they became a vigilante

so you have the obvious ones

like bruce is in wayne manor bc he became batman in honor of the wayne family legacy

jason is the middle of crime alley bc the reason he put on the mask was to help all those street kids that where just like him

steph ends up in her father's cell

(gcpd has stopped asking why spoiler ends up in cluemaster's cell)

(dick respawns in bruce's lap bc brudick)

meanwhile tim ends up wherever jason is when he's in the city or at jason's home when jason's out of town

bc at the end of the day tim became robin for jason

in honor of jason's memory

to keep jason's father alive and sane

jason, jason, jason

always and forever

[uwmspeccoll]

Milestone Monday

Poetry in Punk

On this day, December 30th, 1946, Patti Smith, a singer, songwriter, author, poet, photographer, and painter, was born in Chicago, Illinois. Often referred to as the "Godmother of Punk," Smith is known for her influential music that blends rock and poetry. Her debut album, Horses, released in 1975, is considered a landmark work in the punk rock genre. Beyond her music career, Patti Smith has written several books, including the acclaimed memoir Just Kids, which explores her relationship with photographer Robert Mapplethorpe and their experiences within the New York City artistic scene. Throughout her life, she has been a prominent cultural figure, advocating for artistic freedom and social change.

Images featured come from:

Our first edition of A Useless Death, a poem by Patti Smith that was published as a chapbook and distributed by Gotham Book Mart and Gallery in New York in 1972.

Ha! Ha! Houdini!, a poem written by Patti Smith and published as a chapbook. It was distributed by Gotham Book Mart and Gallery in New York in 1977.

Robert Mapplethorpe, released by Peter Weiermair and published by Robert Wilk in 1981. The contexts come from a catalogue of an exhibition sponsored by the Frankfurter Kunstverein, April 10-May 17, 1981, and features an introduction by Sam Wagstaff, the artistic mentor and benefactor to Robert Mapplethorpe and Patti Smith.

Some Women by Robert Mapplethorpe that features an introduction by one of the pioneers of New Journalism, Joan Didion. Our first edition was published in Boston by Bulfinch Press in 1989.

Robert Mapplethorpe by Richard Marshall with essays by American poet, literary critic essayist, teacher, and translator Richard Howard, and South African-born American writer and editor Ingrid Sischy. Our copy is the first cloth edition, published in New York: Whitney Museum of American Art; Boston: in association with Bulfinch Press: Little, Brown and Company in 1988.

Mapplethorpe prepared in collaboration with the Robert Mapplethorpe Foundation with an essay by American art critic, philosopher, and Professor Arthur C. Danto. This first edition was published in 1992 by Random House in New York.

-View more Milestone Monday posts

-Melissa, Special Collections Graduate Intern

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Cluemaster: Hey, bro, I know I never call...

Kiteman: You did drunk call me that one time.

Cluemaster: I already said I was sorry for spreading around that you were in love with your kite and calling you to brag about it. As you said I was hella drunk and angry your weird ass podcast somehow now has the same level of fans as my old gameshow. Who the fuck cares that much about kites? Or C list vilany?

Kiteman: Did you just call to remind me why I hate you?

Cluemaster: Of course not, Chucky boy, your my favorite lil bro.

Kiteman: Arthur... I'm your only brother.

Cluemaster: Yeah? You're still my favorite.

Kiteman: Okay. Fine. What do you want?

Cluemaster: You're good with kids right?

Kiteman: Oh do you want me to babysit little Steph? I haven't see her since she was a baby! That'll be soo much fun!

Cluemaster: Oh, no, no. She is too old for a babysitter. I kindda called 'cause I need your advice.

Kiteman: Sure. Go on.

Cluemaster: How would you stop a prank war between your teen daugther and your bussiness partner that happens to be living at your house?

Kiteman: Woah. Define prank war?

Cluemaster: Like they just being annoying with each other... like non-stop Shrek music and painting one of her walls green?

Kiteman: Are you working with a child, Artie?

Cluemaster: No. Childrem are not really good at puzzle robberies.

Kiteman: So who the hell is in a prank war with your fourteen year old daugther? Is it that Polka Dot weirdo?

Cluemaster: ... Riddler.

Kiteman: Be honest, Arthur.

Cluemaster: I am!

Kiteman: Why the fuck would he work with you? Didn't he like was brought on to one of your trials and tried to sue you for being a copycat?

Cluemaster: No idea. I don't really remember all my trials.

Kiteman: Fair. Still isn't he like an actual treat? Like Batman actually tries to be always involved in his crimes instead of just sending a Robin or a cop kindda treat? Or hangs out with Cooblepot and Harley Quinn and fucking Catwoman and even Scarecrow and Joker kindda treat?

Cluemaster: Yes, so what?

Kiteman: He is waaay above your league. How the fuck do you got him to work with you?

Cluemaster: He is working for me because he recognizes my genius.

Kiteman: *sarcasm* Yeah, sure. At least it explains why I've been hearing that your plans don't totally suck anymore.

Cluemaster: Will you help me or not?

Kiteman: Anything for little Steph. But seriusly bro, the guy is a mentally instable killer, he is real Arkham loonie, A-lister and all this shit are you sure is safe to have him living with you? Specially if he and Stephanie are fighting!? She is just a kid! What if this prank war thing escalates and next thing she is in saw type death trap or something?

Cluemaster: Well than help me not to! I can't just kick him out, do you know how much I've been proffiting later?

Kiteman: And also he is an instable killer that used to hate you and wouldn't react well to being kicked out?

Cluemaster: Yeah, this too. Look I think you're overestimating the guy. He is smart and all and he can take a punch but I could take him out real easy in a one on one. He screamed like a little girl when he found a roach in the kitchem. I think I'll be fine.

Kiteman: Sure, you do you.... Maybe.... you could just.... help them find something they have in common? A TV show they like or something. It used yo work with us. They will bond over the thing and forget they hate each other for a bit.

Cluemaster: See was it that hard to help me?

*Chuck hangs up*

[Three months later]

Cluemaster: Chuck! I need help!

Kiteman: Can you call in another time? I'm bowlling with the guys, Calendar Man and Condiment King cannot win a second time, one weird rap about their love conquering all was ENOUGHT.

Cluemaster: Is about the whole prank war between Nygma and Stephanie thing.

Kiteman: Oh. So I guess my advice didn't work.

Cluemaster: No, no, it did. It worked way to well actually.

Kiteman: *worried* That sounds bad.

Cluemaster: Yeah... it happened that the thing they had in common was that they really hate me.

[genevieveetguy]

. As a lawyer, I've had to learn that people aren't just good or just bad. People are many things.

Anatomy of a Murder, Otto Preminger (1959)

[pathologicalreid]

hi!!! totally up to you if you want to write it (it maybe too self indulgent ahhhhh). but i was think of bau!reader (or bau!adjacent) who has known spencer for forever and has watched him "glow up"/become more confident and is now dating him, but is now more self-conscious that he will realize that he is totally out of her league since women are now hitting on him all the time and he is able to basically flip men in the field. something like that if you get the vibe? just a girlfriend who is worried her boyfriend will outgrow her and is scared they'll breakup. feel free to ignore! love your work sm!!!

a league of your own | S.R.

as your boyfriend seemingly evolves, you grow increasingly aware of the feeling of being left behind

who? spencer reid x fem!reader category: flangst (heavy on the fluff, more like internalized angst) content warnings: in a bar but neither spencer nor reader are drinking, follows the events of 14x12 "hamelin", discusses the pronunciation of asmr word count: 1.4k a/n: self conscious reader is so important to me. this is for everyone who has a hard time naming their feelings. thank you for requesting!!

“He flipped him over the table?” You asked, raising your eyebrows as you looked up at Tara, who was talking about your boyfriend’s maneuvering of Arthur Brodie in the field. In passing, you had heard about the mark left on the suspect’s forehead, but you hadn’t heard the story of how he had gotten it – until now.

Bringing her cup to her lips, Tara nodded at you, her expression clarifying that it was as impressive as it sounded. You sighed at the newest addition to Spencer’s ever-evolving personality, it was hard not to think of them as grievances against you, but that’s what it felt like.

You looked over your shoulder to the bar, trying to scope out where he had disappeared to before you spotted a familiar mess of brown curls. From where you were standing, you could see him holding two drinks in his hands, but it wasn’t until he shifted his stance that you saw the girl that he was speaking with. “And that’s three,” Luke observed, shaking his head in disbelief as he watched the same scene as you.

Emily asked what he was talking about, but you tuned them out as you watched the interaction. You already knew this was the third woman to hit on him since the team entered the bar thirty minutes ago.

There was no mistaking it, your boyfriend was easy on the eyes, and you weren’t naïve enough to try to deny that fact. Still, you were having a hard time adjusting to seeing him garner exponentially more attention from people at the bar. “You better go get your man, or she might steal him away from you,” Luke taunted, nodding his head in the direction of the bar.

“What?” Your head snapped back in the direction of the bar, eyes wide as you peered across the bar where Spencer was talking animatedly to the blonde in front of him before he looked behind himself and gestured to you, prompting you to wave timidly at the both of them.

The girl sneered in your direction before spinning on her heel and trudging away, freeing your boyfriend to return to you at the table. “They didn’t have any limes, so they put a lemon in your Shirley Temple,” Spencer said apologetically, dropping a kiss on the part of your hair as he set the glass in front of you.

Shaking your head, you smiled up at him, “That’s fine, thank you.” You told him, placing your hand on the glass and spinning it to better access the straw.

If he noticed anything odd, he didn’t comment on it, instead deciding to contribute to Tara and Rossi’s conversation on ASMR.

As the team continued to chat around you, you just continued spinning your glass on the oak table, becoming more and more conscious of the way your thighs stuck to the leather booth. Your eyes only flicked up when you noticed people staring at you, “What?” You asked, heart racing as you had been caught daydreaming.

The five remaining members of your team at the table were all looking at you with similar curious looks, “Rossi’s headed out. He was just saying goodbye,” Penelope said, reaching across the table and awkwardly patting your hand.

“Oh,” you responded meekly, “Have a good night. Tell Krystall I said hi.” You shifted in your seat, the sound of your legs unsticking from the seat seemingly amplified tenfold in your self-conscious state.

As Dave made his way out, Spencer gestured for you to move over so he could sit next to you. Tara got up to get in line for the restroom and Luke and Garcia weaseled their way into one of their patented bickering matches, you nearly jumped when you felt Spencer’s hand settle on your thigh. “Alright,” he muttered, turning his head to you, “What’s up with you tonight?”

Frowning, you looked up at Spencer, brown eyes studying your face as he hunted for even the slightest hint of what had gotten into you. The only problem was you didn’t have a name for it yourself. It could be perceived as jealousy, but you weren’t concerned with anyone actually taking Spencer’s attention away from you, you were just feeling feelings. Unnamable feelings.

You brought your glass closer to you, the condensation being a welcome relief on your warm skin, pinching the straw as you took a sip of your drink. “Nothing’s up,” you said, stirring the lemon wedge around in your glass.

“Are you sure? You look flushed,” he said, pursing his lips thoughtfully before he gently pushed his water in your direction.

Brushing off his concern, you turned your attention to watching Luke and Garcia in an animated discussion on how to pronounce ASMR – Penelope insisted she was right, and Luke didn’t necessarily care either way. You only moved your gaze when the blonde from earlier passed by again, dragging her palm over Spencer’s shoulder, causing him to lean into you.

Flustered, you took a long sip of your drink before setting it back down, “Can we go?” You asked Spencer, pressing your lips together in a thin line as you looked at him expectantly.

As he began to put puzzle pieces together, he nodded, standing up and gathering your glasses to set them on the bar. You said your goodbyes before leading the way out and flipping Luke off as he called out something about protection, something that would have previously left Spencer embarrassed and stammering, but now made him chuckle as he held the door open for you.

Part of you was grateful for this sort of evolution in Spencer, he was, after all, more confident in every aspect of his life. Now waiting for the metro, you looked at him, longer hair, his work shirt unbuttoned at the top and pushed up to his elbows. The light breeze in the tunnel moved his hair as he crossed his arms in front of his chest, “Are you alright, love?”

Your shoulders drooped helplessly at the pet name, “You shoved a guy on a table?”

His face fell, “Is that what this is about? Me using force against a suspect?”

Quickly, you shook your head, “No, no. He pushed Tara, it’s not that at all,” you scrambled to reassure him, knowing he was afraid that his time in federal prison had made him a violent person. “It’s just… you shoved a guy onto a picnic table and you’re getting hit on by people in bars and you’re dressing differently and I’m just… me.” You hold your hands out as if you’re on display, looking down at the sundress you had thrown on and the sneakers you wore for comfort instead of style.

“Are you jealous that I’m getting attention from other people?” He asked, “Because I’ve never encouraged anyone.” That was true, last week a deputy sheriff had made a move on your boyfriend, and the only thing he had gotten in return was an earful on how you had made the deduction that eventually solved the case.

Bowing your head, you regretted ever saying anything in the first place, “No,” you groaned, “What’s that term for someone who can’t name their emotions? That’s me. Right now. At this moment.”

Spencer chuckled at your frustration, “It’s called alexithymia, and there’s nothing wrong with that.”

“I’ve watched you change in front of my very own eyes in the last year, and I guess I’m just feeling left behind,” you admitted. “You’re a changed person and there’s nothing different about me.”

He tilted his head to the side curiously, “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything,” you said desperately, hoping to get to the bottom of your conflicting emotions.

“Did you love me before?”

You froze, looking up at him, “Of course.”

He raised his eyebrows, reaching out and tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, “And you love me now?”

Nodding, you stepped closer to him, “Very much so.”

“Then there’s nothing else I could possibly ask of you,” he told you, smiling as you blushed. “You don’t need to change in time with me, and – since we’re being honest – I’ve always felt like I’m the one lagging behind you. So, maybe I’ve just been playing catch-up.”

You frowned, moving even closer to him as the platform grew crowded, “Well, now I feel ridiculous.”

“Not ridiculous,” he murmured, “Just human,” Spencer amended.

[duckprintspress]

There is honestly so much good stuff going public domain in 2025 that I couldn't include it all. I had to leave off An American in Paris by George Gershwin! and Bolero by Maurice Ravel! and Nobody Knows the Trouble I've Seen as recorded by Marian Anderson!! And so much more! And a lot of directors (such as Hitchcock and Demille!) talkie debuts

Check out the full list here and tell me: which are YOU most excited about?

See this guy?

Yeah, he'll now be in the public domain too.

[nonsensology]

This was supposed to just be a rough sketch, but then I started getting really invested in it.

I hadn't initially intended to include so many picture book characters, but the nostalgia was overwhelming. Does anyone remember the animated short films produced by Weston Woods? My local library used to have a bunch of them on the Scholastic VHS tapes from the late 90s. (I know some shorts were released on the Children's Circle VHS tapes back in the 80s (🎶 Come on along! Come on along! Join the caravan!), and some were packaged in Sammy's Story Shop in 2008.)

Characters:

Max, from Where the Wild Things Are, written and illustrated by Maurice Sendak

Peter, from The Snowy Day, written and illustrated by Ezra Jack Keats

Brother Bear and Sister Bear, from The Berenstain Bears series, written and illustrated by Stan and Jan Berenstain

Pooh and Piglet, from the Winnie-the-Pooh books, by A. A. Milne, illustrated by E. H. Shepard

Owen, from Owen, written and illustrated by Kevin Henkes.

Mouse, from If You Give a Mouse a Cookie, by Laura Joffe Numeroff, illustrated by Felicia Bond

Louis, from The Trumpet of the Swan, by E. B. White

Mr. Toad, from The Wind in the Willows, by Kenneth Grahame, based on the illustrations by E. H. Shepard

Mr. Tumnus, from The Chronicles of Narnia series, by C. S. Lewis

Pippi and Mr. Nilsson, from the Pippi Longstocking books, by Astrid Lindgren

Willy Wonka, from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, by Roald Dahl, based on the illustrations by Quentin Blake

Matilda, from Matilda, by Roald Dahl, based on the illustrations by Quentin Blake (with an homage to the Mara Wilson movie)

Peter Pan and Tinker Bell, from Peter Pan, by J. M. Barrie

Merlin and Archimedes, from The Sword in the Stone, by T. H. White, based on the illustrations by Dennis Nolan

Pinocchio, from Pinocchio, by Carlo Collodi, based on the illustrations by Enrico Mazzanti

Alice, White Rabbit, and Cheshire Cat, from Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, by Lewis Carroll, illustrated by John Tenniel

Rupert Bear, from the Rupert stories, created by Mary Tourtel and continued by Alfred Bestall, John Harrold, Stuart Trotter, and others.

Arthur Read, from the Arthur series, written and illustrated by Marc Brown

Tin Woodman and Scarecrow, from the Land of Oz series, by L. Frank Baum, based on the illustrations by W. W. Denslow and John R. Neill

The Cat in the Hat, from The Cat in the Hat, written and illustrated by Dr. Seuss

a frog on a flying lily pad, from Tuesday, written and illustrated by David Wiesner

Charlotte, from Charlotte's Web, by E. B. White

[not-that-dillinger]

"There's five main types, white, green black, oolong, and pu-erh, but numerous different flavors from each type depending on the variety, and other plants can sometimes be added in to create other flavors. And that's not to mention the varieties that are often called tea and are made in the same way, but use different different types of plants."

Ed paused in consideration. "Pets are..." ...did the Grid have other life forms besides programs? "...other life forms, kept as companions." He opened the photo library on the tablet, and pulled up a picture of (what he affectionately called) his little flock of feathered menaces.

"This one's Turing," he said, pointing to a white bird with splashes of red feathers and a large ruff of feathers and what almost looked like the feathered version lion's mane around it's neck. "The one next to her is Dwar Ev," he said, pointing to a bird that appeared like she was trying to make herself taller than the rest and had an inflated crop. Her feathers were almost seemingly metallic gold in color, except for her wings, which were black with an emerald green sheen. "And then that's Mark V--" a black and white bird with checkered wings with white dots on her wing tips and a white crescent on her chest--"and finnally Clacks." Clacks, for all that she was the largest of the birds, was the most normal looking of the flock, slate blue with red bars on her wings, and shiny green feathers around her neck.

((This is a companion piece to this thread.))

[Side B: Rescue]

Haste was the word of the cycle and Ark moved quicker than ever.

Her and her lightcycle flew across the Outlands and straight for Tron City, making up for the time she had lost while she was out.

As she traveled, deep underneath the surface of the Outlands, one Gridbug, out of many, became poisoned for no discernable reason.

Ark knew where the Occupation had most likely taken Ed, and the increased guards around the building confirmed her suspicions.

She remained stealthy as long as possible, revealing herself only when she could sneak no further.

Ark fought her way through the building, alarms blaring as she took on multiple Sentries at a time. The narrow hallways worked in her favor, as only a few Sentries could approach her at a time, so she was never outnumbered in a way she couldn't handle.

It took all of Ed's will not to shrink back from Clu as the guards brought him to the tyrant.

Clu grinned like a Cheshire cat. Whatever he had planned for Ed, it was certainly much worse than what he had just been through. It looked like Clu wanted to say something. Probably to intimidate Ed, play with him before doing... whatever.

Ed had plenty of experience of taking control of situations. He also knew how to be a menace.

Beat Clu to the punch. Hit him where it hurt.

Ed opened his mouth, but before either of them could say anything, the sound of fighting came from the hallway.

Ark?

Ed had no idea if it was her or not, but if there was fighting coming this way, it was likely they were coming for him. At the very least, fighting meant they were against the occupation, and thus a potential ally.

Ed twisted sharply, then dropping down to break free of his captors. He backed away, and pulled off one of his boots. It was hefty; much heavier than his loafers.

Ed chucked it, then the other, at Clu.

Without waiting to see if either hit their mark, Ed turned and ran.

Behind him, there was the heavy thud of one of the boots hitting the ground, and an angered, pained roar from Clu. He approached the fight as cautiously as possible, while also not loosing speed. (The guard or Clu catching hi would not end well, an he most certainly would not get another chance to escape.)

He sighed with relief when he recognized Ark's lightcycle.

[fryingpan1234567]

DC high school au… mayhaps…..

I’m not sure if anyone’s done this before

But I’m doing it now

So the JL, right. These are famous alumni who made school history and now obvi they’re billionaires and reporters and museum owners but they’re not superheroes— just regular people

Liiike Clark Kent was the best quarterback the school has ever seen

Oliver Queen essentially revolutionized the archery team

Diana Prince convinced the school to start a fencing league

Barry Allen slayed both track and any and all chemistry competitions thrown his way

Arthur Curry… I shouldn’t have to say anything about his swim team career. That’s where he met his wife

Bruce Wayne was one of the smartest people probably ever, especially to grace that building

And so on and so forth

Anyways so these people are famous, and they’re up on the walls and display cases and shit

The staff!! Was so thrilled!! To be getting their children!!!!

(The principal counted down the days on his calendar after the news hit that Brucie adopted his first kid)

So.

Dick and Barbara are seniors. Dick is the cheer captain and Babs WAS on the team until a fun little accident that has her wheelchair-bound. (It’s fine, she discovered she actually likes computers better. She’d hacked the entire security system one day at lunch because she got bored)

Dick is kind of the queen bee of the school, which is hilarious, because he KNOWS but refuses to let it get to his head. This man will start water gun fights in the hallways for fun

Jason and Cass are juniors

Jason is one of the drama club’s absolute best (singing and acting). He played Billy Flynn in Chicago, Prince Charming in Cinderella, Aladdin in… yeah. He slays pretty hard

Cass is on the dance team and regularly misses class for some competition or another. Sometimes, when cheerleaders and the dance team collab on stuff (like assemblies), she actually likes the pompoms. She does not like the skirts.

Tim, Steph, and Duke are sophomores— people are s c a r e d of these three

Tim is known for constantly having a stockpile of energy drinks in his locker; sometimes a few of his friends get access to it. He’s also terrifyingly smart. And he’s got a bike. SOPHOMORE YEAR. TIM WHAT

Steph’s whole entire TikTok presence is lifting/ workout challenges against any poor scrub who tries to go up against her. She can lift the same amount as Jason Todd. That gives her a very confident “don’t fuck with me aura” around school, which is good, because she’s got zero interest in any guy there anyways (bi f pref queen)

And Duke… Duke is the golden boy, so the first time you see him in a sparring match with any of his siblings (they do that for fun at lunch), you’re very shocked to see him holding his own against Cassandra Cain and Stephanie Brown. He also slays

Damian is the only freshman in his family. Jason and Tim make fun of him endlessly

It is pretty impressive that a freshie organized the biggest fundraiser the school has ever seen— and it was for local animal shelters. Nobody knows how he did it. Probably intimidation. You never know with that kid

Now the superfam. Ohoho, yes, these legends go to that school too

Kara is a junior, Kon is a sophomore, Jon is a freshman. They’re all on the football team (their dad comes to every game🥰)

Did anybody expect a woman or freshman to land on the varsity team the first year either of them tried out? No. But they made it anyways. Good for them

And football is just so different from their day-to-day personalities, sometimes it gives people whiplash

Kara pretty much runs the broadcast and yearbook teams, and she does it along with dominating the football field and gym

Conner looks like he’d deck you for looking at him wrong (I mean he might but like he won’t… probably), and he’s like. He makes good fashion choices. He’s the Bad Boy, which is funny considering his nerdy bf is the one with the motorcycle

Jon is fluffy?? So nice?? Sir who let an actual decent person on the varsity football team?? When someone spots Dami wearing his letterman at some point, they become the most popular couple at school. As freshmen. Slay for them tbh

Donna Troy is a senior. Fencing and beauty pageants is a weird combination. But she knows she’s pretty and she’s gonna make damn sure everybody else knows too

Cassie is a freshie, but she’s already on the fencing team as well and several people have seen her sparring with Damian (wHERE did he get KATANAS), and it looks like a couple of war gods who happen to be fifteen are fighting to the death for a few yards of shitty grass behind the school

Conner Hawke, Artemis Crock, Emiko Queen, Roy Harper, and Mia Dearden are the archery team captains. Yeah, there’s five of them, yeah, the coaches couldn’t pick because the kIDS ARE BETTER THAN THEM

(Ollie laughed so hard he fell out of his chair when they came home and told him that)

Roy is a junior and definitely brings his bow everywhere he shouldn’t. He also “accidentally” shot Jason once. Whenever someone asks about their meetcute they just laugh until the person gets scared and runs away

Conner is a sophomore but a bitter old man in his soul. What a king

Artemis is also a sophomore and everyone thinks she’s Ollie’s favorite because she’s like a mini-him, but Ollie doesn’t actually HAVE a favorite and she finds this claim hilarious

Mia, third sophomore, has a very strange attraction to the color yellow. She LOVES it. And she actually pulls it off, how awesome is she

Emi is a freshman but gets along with Dami pretty well, which isn’t surprising considering their matching deadpan humor and lowkey murderous rage constantly

Jackson Hyde broke Arthur’s record for fastest lap on his fourth try. He spends more time at the ocean than literally anywhere else

Wally West and Bart Allen are technically not related?? They’re like. Cousins. But Barry ended up officially adopting Wally (long story)

Anyways they’re actually cousins with Jesse Quick

The three of them DOMINATE track and field/ cross country/ physics club (yeah you read that last one right don’t even with me)

Wally is a senior and working towards becoming a forensic scientist for the cops. When someone asks why the fuck he wanted to do that to himself, he always jokes, “I’m not fast enough to be a serial killer so I guess I’ll help catch ‘em” and everyone is scared

Bart is a sophomore but should be a freshie, because he’s almost a full year younger, except that he skipped fifth grade and went straight to sixth. Tim and Kon pretend to be his adoptive parents and it’s like a soap opera watching these three act out a dramatic divorce arc

Jesse is a junior (alliteration go brr) but a younger one (summer birthday WOO) she definitely takes after Barry, especially in speed

SO people call their friend groups chaotic. What are you gonna do, go up and fuck with any of them? Bad idea

For fun, these assholes run a fight club after school with betting and rosters and everything, with anyone who signs up. FOR FUN. Once the batkids learned their dad has a black belt in like six different martial arts, it was all over

They say it’s a good workout

They’re probably not wrong, but still

Who the fuck wakes up and chooses violence on all their friends and family all in good fun to make MONEY OFF OF BEATING THEM UP

The most viral videos taken from their school is a push-up contest with all eight batkids, seven competing, Babs filming

Cass won.

LET me know if you want more for this. Because I’m gonna write more. But if you had specific suggestions or characters or scenarios or questions, I would love to write them

Good morning/ night/ 4am!! (PS BACK TO SCHOOL WOO)

[ed-recoverry]

List of free audiobooks on YouTube for anyone interested

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen

The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Diary of a Wimpy Kid by Jeff Kinney

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain

Alice in Wonderland

Animal Farm by George Orwell

The Shadow Over Innsmouth by H P Lovecraft

Frankenstein by Mary Shelley

Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Hatchet by Gary Paulsen

Twelve Years a Slave by Solomon Northup

Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck

The Village by Caroline Mitchell

The Wonderful Wizard of Oz

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (fuck JKR)

Sense & Sensibility by Jane Austen

The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood

Twilight by Stephanie Meyer

Upside Down by Danielle Steel

The Fiancée by Kate White

The Silence of the Lambs by Thomas Harris

Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Theif

Accidentally Married by Victoria E. Lieske

I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy

The Collector (book one) by Nora Roberts

The Lies I Told by Mary Burton

Dead Man’s Mirror by Agatha Christie

The Hobbit

The Taken Ones by Jess Lourey

The Good Neighbour by R J Parker

The Island House by Elana Johnson

Desperation by Stephan King

The Healing Summer by Heather B. Moore

The Last Affair by Margot Hunt

To Be Claimed by Willow Winter

Romeo and Juliet by Shakespeare

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

The Inn by James Patterson

Wonder by R J Palacio

Faking It With The Billionaire by Willow Fox

The Lost Years by Mary Higgins Clark

Forrest Gump by Winston Groom

The Janson Directive by Robert Ludlum

The Catcher in the Rye

The Lottery Winner by Mary Higgins Clark

Where Eagles Dare by Alistair MacLean

Death of a Nurse by M C Beaton

Yours Truly by Abby Jimenez

Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson

The Sonnets by William Shakespeare

Frozen Betrayal by Clive Cussler

The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde

Line of Fire by R J Patterson

Don’t Believe Everything You Think by Joseph Nguyen

The Remnant by Tim LaHaye

The Magic of Reality by Richard Dawkins

The Secret of Chimneys by Agatha Christie

Payment in Kind by J A Jance

The Idiot by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida

The Game of Life and How to Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn

The Richest Man in Babylon by George S. Clason

To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee

A Marriage of Anything but Convenience by Victorine E. Lieske

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain

A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens

The Inheritance Game by Jennifer Lynn Barnes

Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life

Thinking Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

The Kama Sutra by Mallanaga Vatsyayana

The Wisdom of Father Brown by G K Chesterton

Robinson Crusoe by Daniel Defoe

Robin Hood by J Walker McSpadden

The Poor Traveller by Charles Dickens

Days on the Road: Crossing the Plains in 1865 by Sarah Raymond Herndon

Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens

Atomic Habits by James Clear

I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream

Trading in the Zone by Mark Douglas

The Art of War by Sun Tzu

The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett

A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson

The Return of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle

The Epic of Gilgamesh

Lord of the Flies by William Golding

A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens

Man After Man

Five on a Treasure Island by Enid Blyton

The Red Badge of Courage by Stephen Crane

Charlotte’s Web

Midsummer Mysteries by Agatha Christie

Out of Silent Planet by C S Lewis

The Valley of Fear by Arthur Conan Doyle

Eaters of the Dead by Michael Crichton

The Murder on the Orient Express by Agatha Christie

The Castle of Otranto by Horace Walpole

21 Lessons for the 21st Century by Yuval Noah Harai

Hamlet by Shakespeare

[hihomeghere]

the newest chapter to baptized by fire made me think of some things… arthur between charles and m/c, so overwhelmed by the feeling of being full and filling up his wife…….. m/c praising him and staring at his face screwed up in pleasure……… so sorry if u don’t take nsfw asks but i was having thoughts 😵‍💫

Oh I take nsfw asks 😏

Warnings/tags : Unprotected sex, anal, cursing, piv, Top!Charles, Bottom!Arthur, breeding kink whoops!

Divider by @saradika

Minors do not interact

“Arthur.” Your voice pulled the azure eyed man’s gaze to you. Nearly drowning in his pools, your hand rested against his cheek. His beard was coming in, the honey brown hair softer than the stubble he had kept. “Arthur.” You repeated, running your thumb over his cheekbone. His brows are pinched together, each breath a stuttering gasp as he twitches inside you. His thighs trembled against yours, his arms shaking in the same fashion as he struggled to hold himself up.

“‘M alright sweetheart just-“ His voice is wrecked, swallowing thickly as he squeezes his eyes shut. 

“You want me to stop?” Charles' deep baritone called from behind him, his hands strikingly dark against Arthur’s pale hips. 

“No!” His eyes shot open again, panicked now as he craned his neck to look behind him. “No just- just give me a minute.” You can feel him pulse deep inside you, clenching unconsciously around him as a small moan left your lips.

“Christ.” He nearly crumbled on top of you, his hair falling into his face as he hung his head. A deep rumble moved up Charles' chest, dimpling the flesh of Arthur's hips as he gripped him.

“Sorry.” You mumbled, chuckling softly as you tucked a piece of hair behind his ear. 

“You ain’t- shit Charles.” Arthur groaned, his brows pulling together tightly. 

“He’s real big, ain’t he honey?” You cooed, smirking at him. How many times had he spoken those same words to you? 

“Course he’s fucking big.” Arthur panted, gripping the sheets beside your head. Charles chuckled, kissing Arthur’s freckled shoulder. 

“You just gotta relax.” Charles hummed, hooking his chin over Arthur’s shoulder. He huffed at that, closing his eyes. “Atta boy.” Charles cooed, kissing his cheek. “Can I move now?”

“Shit. Yes.” Arthur raised his eyes to look at you, gleaming with determination. Charles pulled back a few inches, before he slowly thrust forward. In turn, Arthur’s hips moved, pressing himself deeper into your warm heat. You moaned, laying your head back on the pillow as he turned your insides to mush. 

With each thrust Arthur lost more and more of his composure. Trembling and panting above you as Charles pulled whimpers and whines from his lips. His Adam’s apple bobbed, sweat glistening on his neck. You tilted your head forward, running your tongue along his salty flesh.

“Good god.” He whimpered, his hips jolting forward. 

“You liked that, didn’t you baby?” Charles hummed, his voice low against Arthur’s ear. A shiver running down his back, gasping as Charles thrust harshly into him. 

“Ah!-“ You cried out, pleasure shooting through your core and down your legs.

“I can’t-“ Arthur choked, his tongue darting out to wet his lips. 

“You can.” You said breathlessly, gripping his chin as you forced him to look at you. “You’re doing so good- so good honey.” You cooed, your gold ring glinting in the low lamplight. Charles grunted with each thrust, pushing Arthur further up the bed and deeper into you. You itched to wrap your legs higher on his hips, to pull him deeper. “You gonna fill me while Charles fills you?” You hummed, holding his face in your hands. His eyes, half lidded in pleasure, nearly rolled back into his head at your words.

“Y-yeah, imma fill you sweetheart.” He babbled, nodding his head. 

“Fill me up until it takes. Ain’t that right Char-les.” Your breath stuttered as Charles picked up the pace. The sound of skin on skin filled the bedroom, along with your harsh breaths. “Gonna fuck me full?” You whined, biting down on your lip as your toes started to curl. You could tell he was close, as were you. The coil inside your belly tightening, ready to snap. 

“Shit-“ Charles hissed above you, the lightning strike scar twitching as he clenched his jaw. 

“Charles-“

“No.” He growled, his eyes obsidian as he stared down at the two of you. Arthur whined, a pitiful sound ripped from his chest as he twitched inside you. “She comes before you do.”

Arthur’s hand moved down your body, finding the bundle of nerves between your legs with ease. Lightning flew from his finger tips as he rubbed against your clit. Your mouth opened in a silent cry as the coil snapped, your toes curling as you came. Clamping down around Arthur, your cunt milking him for his release.

“Charles-“ Arthur choked, his eyelids fluttering as his hand gripped your hip.

“Come.” Arthur collapsed, his groan nearly shaking the walls of the cabin as he came. A deep guttural sound as he poured into you, filling you with molten heat. “Shit, shit, shit-“ Charles huffed, his hips stuttering against Arthur’s as he pulled him flush to his pelvis.

Arthur laid his head between your breasts, his breath fanning against your skin leaving goosebumps in its wake. For a moment the only sound was all of your breath, harsh and panting as you struggled to return to this plain. 

You wet your lips, looking down at Charles as he pulled out of Arthur. You ran your fingers through his hair, scratching lightly at his scalp as Charles cleaned up his mess between his cheeks.

“You want some water baby?” Charles asked, gently massaging Arthur’s hips as he kissed his way up his spine.

“Mmhm.” He nodded, turning his head to lay against your breast. He raised his hips, pulling out of you with a soft sigh. His arms wrapped around your waist like you were his personal teddy bear, nuzzling into your chest. 

Charles returned with a canteen, handing it over to Arthur as he laid down next to you. Arthur brought it to his lips, a trickle running down his chin as he greedily drank. He handed it to you, the cool water soothing your throat.

“Think you learned your lesson?” Charles asked, raising an eyebrow as he ran his fingers down Arthur’s back.

“Yes. Yes I did.” He huffed, cracking open an eye to glare half heartedly at him.

[bee-a-garbage-shipper]

OP did not like the fact their preference was losing.

Or the fact that they where getting called the fuck out in the notes.

And as for Steph, for me personally, when Bruce is at his best he tries to take care of her and their relationship borders the line between niece/daughter and uncle/father.

Steph probably wouldn't take actual parenting from Bruce well because she does love her mother and she has a complicated relationship with her father but Bruce does care about her and wants her to be taken care of.

But even though no one shares blood and Steph would undoubtedly go "I am not related to these crazy people." (To be contrarian if nothing else.) By Anti standards the relationship I described would have Steph be enough of a Wayne for TimSteph and StephCass (and JaySteph, DickSteph, DukeSteph, DamiSteph and BruSteph) to be incest.

But for some reason it only counts when I ship JayTim. Because Jason and Tim are boys and they're homophobic.

HI I thought you'd like to vote on this poll!!!! Because I hate how annoying people can be (and yes I voted for yes and that's the propaganda I'm trying to give here lol) don't feel forced to! https://www.tumblr.com/bibibusinessman/745499108695048193/do-you-support-batcest-even-for-not-legal-batkids?source=share

Link

Yes I would like to vote. Yes I did vote yes. And yes I am incredibly bitter about the amount of people in the tags and comments saying Babs and Steph aren't really BatFam members.

Like one, the fans at large didn't fight fucking hard to get Babs and Steph as officially recognized as BatFam members.

And two, Jim and Bruce are friends there's no way that baby Babs didn't call Bruce Uncle at least once. Dick//Babs is a Cousin Ship and I will die on that hill.

[just-an-enby-lemon]

i think the reason wojar riddler's design feels wrong is not the individual design elements but that he has the wrong vibes: he looks like an asshole in a 'violent fuckboy who uncomfortably flirts with women at bars and gets angry when they don't want him' way and not in a 'sleazy smug conman that is about to scam you out of your life savings' way

YES. I agree.

But for me the whole goes a little bit deeper. What really annoys me over Riddler's desing in WoJaR is that it looks too similar - in vibes - to Cluemaster.

People, me included, like to call Cluemaster dumber Riddler, but the thing that actually diferentiates them and makes the presence of both in the same narrative interesting is how different they are personality wise. They may have the same gimmick (although Edward comits harder and is an actual genius to bolt) but they have completly different motivators and are just very very different on general. To the point where while Edward should by all means be the worst person (his crimes are harder to solve, he has waay less care for human life, his motivations are insane, he doesn't have any connection he truly cares for in opposition of Arthur actually loving his daugther just still being the worst father, he is the annoying one and he is the actualy dangerous one) we still fell like we would preffer our chances with him because Arthur is just such an unpleasant person. The whiplash Steph must have felt while having to live with both of them and realizing that her C-lister dad was just waay worse than the A-lister he was coping can by itself explain why she has such a disdain for Eddie.

That's to say that for me Edward WoRaJ desing actually gives Cluemaster vibes. It is clearly Riddler. You would never mistake them. But the "violent fuckboy" energy is completly Arthur's.

Now that is based on my personal interpretation of both Riddler and Cluemaster so feel free to disagree.

[mister-eames]

this is probably discussed before and it’s right there in your header, why are eames and arthur dressed as each other in the first level of the dream?

I'm going to be on my BS here and you're probably going to slowly back away and say ash, wtf, take off the tin-foil hat but BUT, heres my take:

So, I think they take inspiration from each other: but on seperate levels. On the first, Arthur dresses like Cobb, they almost look like siblings in the way their mum made them wear the same outfit. This is out of necessity, Arthur needs to be a blunt instrument in this level, a thug, he doesn't need to appear or be refined in any way.

BUT Eames is dressed like Arthur even when he's being Peter Browning. We only see Peter Browning ever wear a plain white shirt. Take for instance below, Peter at work and Peter in the brief photo:

Even Fischers PROJECTION of Peter is wearing a plain white shirt:

HOWEVER when Eames forges Peter, Eames chooses to go with the exact same outfit that Arthur is wearing on the plane. Why? Either, like Arthur in leather, he thought he had to channel who he thought he needed to be - an assertive, powerful man (like Arthur) - or it really just was a Freudian slip and he simply had Arthur on the brain. I like to think its a combination of both - because I know Eames didn't shadow Peter for that long only to mess up the shirt - he was thinking about Arthur even if he didn't realise it. He had Arthur all over his mind. He went to sleep on that plane looking at Arthur and THEN he got told two minutes later hey, uh, this might be the last time you ever see each other bc limbo and THEN this outfit moment:

Now, bear with me - on the second level everyone is dressed in a very interesting manner - Cobb/Mr Charles is dressed like Fischer - Ariadne is dressed like Saito in his very first appearance - and Arthur is dressed like Arthur save for the paisley tie - very curious because a) its not an Arthur tie, and b) it matches what Eames is wearing even without having seen him first. Arthur now knows he needs to be extra resourceful on this level, he needs to be wily, he needs to be creative, knowing what he knows now about the very real threat and possibility of limbo and c) maybe he needs some mental reassurance/comfort in a veritable warzone - it's the most cohesive these two are dressed, which has always been a study in contrast, and its especially reflected in the merry chase/go to sleep moment. These two outfits are finally complementary:

TLDR; I think how they dress reflects: a) who they think they need to be (drawing inspiration in each other), and b) changes when the stakes get much higher i.e. subconscious filtering

[cryptiidcrowe]

the manipulate manslaughter manwhore himself <33

deep dive into design choices under the cut!

i went into this design imagining him as the gold standard of tumblr sexymen, and then accidentally made him gnc as fuck and now he’s my gender. oops lol

- i knew i wanted to make his vest and tie patterned, bc he strikes me as someone who’d wear garish but somehow still classy (& probably also clashing) patterns. i also decided to make each piece correspond with arthur and john—the vest has the same brown and gold color scheme as arthur with an eye motif (for arthur’s blindness but also kayne’s sort of omniscient vibe). the tie has the same color scheme as my john (more or less exactly colorpicked) with a marigold pattern, both for the nickname and for its flower language—among other things, marigold symbolizes the sun, and also death. i had a ton of fun making the symbolism work for both boys but also fit with kayne’s vibe c:

(also, if i ever animate kayne, i imagine the patterns do that thing where the patterns don’t move with him but rather look like they’re a part of the background, if that makes sense; heightening his sort of uncanny otherworldly vibe)

- i purposefully wanted to make kayne look a little uncanny and inhuman! sharp stylized teeth (he’s always got a toof sticking out), forked tongue, and long pointy ears. also this bitch’s anatomy makes no sense & can and will change whenever! generally his legs are very long and his waist very small (& grabbable. grab if you dare), but as seen in the profile shot with his mouth, he’s always just kinda. off.

- his eyes are kind of slanted & mono-lidded, and his irises are more square shaped than circular. his pupils are upside down crosses. also he has the most luscious lashes imaginable

- he carries a cane around just for the aesthetic. it is nonfunctional other than self-referential jokes and murder

- face is generally made up of long & very sharp shapes. i was a little worried about his head shape being too similar to arthur’s, since his is also long with strong cheekbones, but i made kayne’s overall more sharp and severe. also pointy nose

small detail lightning round:

- he has moles! trust me he told me himself

- tails on his suit, kinda tattered and ragged looking; sort of mirrors the right hair strand

- dramatic arched eyebrows w a slutty eyebrow slit

[tally-kiza]

Joker (2019) Smut Alphabet

A/N: Long overdue, by request, a smut alphabet specifically for Joker (+ Reader). He’s somewhat different from how Arthur used to be, but perhaps not as much as you may think. (I write this 10 months after my first smut alphabet for Arthur, so my interpretation for him has definitely changed. Apologies for any inconsistencies.)

Words: 3334

Warnings: Mentions of self-harm for R(isk) and T(oys).

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Joker is frankly clueless about aftercare. He’s not doting after sex, but he’ll light a cigarette and clean himself off. Even for his first few times, he’ll never seem clingy or particularly cuddly afterwards, but you can tell he’s emotionally affected by the way he holds you to his chest. While he puffs away, he’ll reverently caress you, your arms, back, hair, anywhere he can. Kisses are pressed to the crown of your head. Sweet pillow talk is domestic, schmaltzy. Joker never thought he would have anything like it. Black moods turn white, heavy heart turns light. A genuine loving smile lights up his face; gone are all cruel smirks and strained grins. 

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Firstly, he has no favorite part of himself. Despite the grandiosity in which he views himself and the way he craves adulation, Joker still doesn’t like himself. He views his body with a neutrality thickly blanketed with disdain. If pressed on it, he does like his hair. Once chocolate brown, now forest green, he’s always taken good care of it.

On his partner, how can he choose? Naturally, Joker is drawn to your smile. But he's addicted to your body,the softness of your skin, the way you feel in his arms. Admittedly though... his eyes do linger on your legs every time you walk away. His hands automatically find them during sex. Your calves are caressed, thighs are gripped, legs wrapped around his hips as he pistons into you.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Thick and grey-ish white. Arthur has never tasted it, never even thought to try. Joker got the urge for it, just once. In the shower, after getting home from the hospital, still exhilarated from the new sense of freedom he felt with Penny dead. He spills in his hand, and licks his fingers clean before sprinkling water from the showerhead can rinse it away. The taste was foul and made him recoil. He’s never tried it since. 

Joker loves seeing you covered in his cum though. Thrill runs through him when his cum paints your chest or face white, or when he watches his cum leak out of your hole and down your thighs after making love.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He’s stolen your underwear before. Remorse is unknown to him; if you discover it, he’ll only giggle and give you a teasing smile. It was easy, a quick swipe from your drawers when you were in the other room. When he’s all alone and you’re not around to pleasure him like he craves, Joker will touch himself to it. His left hand wraps around his cock, stroking and rubbing in a way so unlike your gentle touch. It makes him miss you all the more. While his right hand holds your underwear so tenderly. Thumb stroking the fabric, he pictures you wearing it. Wearing it for him. Thoughts of fucking you while you wear it fill his head, and his jerking fist becomes more frantic. When he finishes, he’s careful not to let his come get on it.

He keeps it stuffed in his suit pocket, treasured, bringing him selfish comfort. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Of course, Arthur is a virgin. He’s never even kissed anyone, before Dr. Sally. She was the one who taught him anything relevant he knew about sex. Before he became Joker, Arthur would sometimes watch her segments on Live! With Murray Franklin. Every time she was on, he was engrossed. No one else had ever talked about sex with such openness and professionality. It intrigued him, left him burning with questions and not enough answers. It wasn’t often that Arthur was able to listen to Dr. Sally’s radio show; it was on during the day and humiliation would swallow him up if Penny ever noticed what he was listening to. But while she napped on the odd day Arthur was home from work, he listened. He never took notes―it wasn’t like he had anyone to take notes for. But his burning curiosity compelled him.

She spoke of many things and though he listened, there was still so much Arthur didn’t understand. 

Until you.

Everything he had heard Dr. Sally discuss, Joker remembered. Despite having no experience, he tried. He didn’t feel as much like a teenager fumbling around in the dark with you for the first time―eagerness spurred him, confidence filled him. Of course, as a virgin, he fumbles. Squeezes his lover’s breast too hard, forgets to pay attention to the clit, and of course, comes early. With every slip-up, his ego and bravado slip away. Just an adoring, hungry man left in its place.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Anything intimate will have a special place in his heart. Making love while spooning, missionary with his cock kissing your deepest places. He’s still a romantic deep down. But it’s also very common for Joker to werewolf and go wild. He’ll bend you over the back of the couch, pump into you pressed against a wall, fuck you on the kitchen countertops, the floor... the list goes on.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Definitely more serious. Before his revelation in identity, when he was only Arthur, on occasion he may have been a little playful during intimacy. A cute Carnival-esque joke would bring a smile to your face, making Arthur’s affections and tenderness soar. But as Joker of course, his tender heart falls away. During sex, he stares at you like he’s dissecting you, like he wants to eat you alive. He’ll smile but there’s nothing goofy about it. It’s ravenous. But rarely, he’ll whisper a naughty joke in your ear―Joker will always crave your grin and giggles. 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Shaving or trimming his pubic hair is not a thought that has ever entered Arthur’s mind. His wiry patch of curls is thick and wild. ...And quite green. Dyeing his hair in the bathroom, a joyless grin pulled at him as he had massaged dye into his patch below. 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He’s always been a romantic at heart. Nothing can change that. Joker may get a little rough, but he craves intimacy and tenderness, a smoldering romance like the ones from his favorite films. Perhaps you won’t find him lighting candles and spreading rose petals, but his romance shows in other ways. It’s in the way he presses you to his chest in a tender embrace. In the way he kisses you with his entire body. In the way his cruel mask falls away from your kisses to reveal the sad, lonely man underneath, waiting for love and care. Love he finds in your arms. The strength of how he cherishes you is evident in your every moment of making love.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

With a lover, Joker would not masturbate very much at all. Without his medications diminishing his libido, he gets aroused more easily than he used to. But when arousal stirs in his groin, he doesn’t wait till he’s in the shower to stroke his girthy cock to completion, as he used to. He turns to you instead. The thought of his own hand wrapped around his member disinterests him; of your walls, tight and hot and wet, excites. He would strongly prefer to make love to you instead of masturbating. Of course, if you’re not around, he’ll have no choice. But he won’t hesitate to slip his left hand into his pants and palm his cock. Filthy fantasies quickly fill his mind. He has a hundred of them, and more. Lascivious thoughts of being worshiped by you and your tongue. Your mouth adoring his member, your gentle fingers revering his testicles, your lips whispering devotion into his ears. He finishes dreaming of the two of you coming together, with a smile on his face. Dissatisfaction sets in quickly, without you by his side to join his pleasure. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Naturally, he has a huge praise kink. Whether its gentle words whispered into his ears, telling him how well he’s fucking you, or desperate pleads to come spurring him on, or even just moaning his name, it feeds his soul as well as his arousal. Joker, Arthur, has been starved for affection his whole life. He craves any and all affection during intimacy, no matter how rough the pace is. It will bring him ever closer to the edge of finishing. And leave him curling around you tighter at the end of the night when it’s time for bed. 

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Joker is not as vanilla as he used to be. Arthur was most comfortable in the bedroom, though when passion inflamed, he would occasionally take you anywhere in the apartment. His desperation to be inside you was too great. But never in public would he make love to you. Joker is not much different. He’ll fuck you on any surface of your shared home, though his inhibitions for public sex are lowered. Bold caresses in a crowded subway car, risky intimate touches in plain view of security cameras at Arkham. But Joker will never fully make love to you in these public spots. Your body is a precious sight for his eyes, and his only. 

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Stroking his ego arouses him as much as stroking his cock. Paying personal attention to him, giving him sweet affection and compliments can easily make him hungry for more. Especially when you laugh at his jokes. It’s the highest compliment, the most tender praise. The melody of your laughter makes his heart flutter and may rouse his erection.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything to do with calling him daddy in bed. It’s 1981; that trend isn’t exactly a popular thing yet. It bewilders and of course, upsets him, because of his history. 

Joker could never tolerate degradation or humiliation in the bedroom, either. More than anything, he hates rudeness, and this does not change with a partner. It would be taken as a betrayal, if anything. You’re Joker’s perfect person. He adores you. Being called something hurtful would instantly upset him and send him right back to feeling like Arthur again: small and weak, laughing uncomfortably through internal agony. He would lash out, and it won’t be the easiest to reconcile with him.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Joker is addicted to the sensation of your lips wrapped around his cock. It makes him feel powerful, worshiped, in control for once. He stares down at you while he holds your head and guides you deeper on his length. When his expression isn’t stony, his smile is intoxicated, eyes red with emotion. There’s no greater thrill for him.

Performing oral on his partner makes him almost as drunk on power and control. Joker is very much a novice, of course. The first few times he tries to eat you out, he can’t make you finish. It confuses him and makes him feel inadequate. As a result, he avoids it for a time. He’s a little pouty when you try to guide him and show him exactly how you like him to lick you. But quickly, Joker discovers how responsive you can truly be. Your moans, whimpers, and whines become the sweet music that lives in his soul. And knowing that only he can make you feel like this, only he can taste you this way feeds his ego in the best way.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Joker is just as likely to rut into you, with quick snapping hips, as he is to lay you down in bed and make love to you with his entire body. Perhaps sensual lovemaking even moreso. At heart, he’s still just Arthur. All he’s ever yearned for is his one and only, his soulmate. He may be Joker but he would still love you tenderly. His favorite intimate nights with you are the romantic ones, the ones that start with a moonlit date before you retire to the bedroom. Clothes are removed leisurely, hands pleasure each other, moans sighed into each others’ mouths as he finishes inside you.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Oh, he is not averse to a 5-minute thrill. When he’s in a rush, it excites him. Though he cherishes the intimacy of a romantic night of making love, Joker has the sharpest gleam in his green eyes when he’s in the mood for a quickie. He eyes you like you’re his last meal. He’ll pull his cock just out of his trousers, push aside your underwear, and fuck into you until you’re feeling sore and used. He cums quickly every time, buzzing from the dirtiness of a quickie, before getting on his knees to finish you with his tongue or sturdy fingers. Afterwards, Joker waltzes away with a spring in his step and the naughtiest smile, every time.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Assuming risk here means doing inherently dangerous sexual acts, along the lines of asphyxiation or playing with weapons, then... Yes and no. When he takes risks, it is when he’s alone and trying to just get off. When he’s in the right (rather, wrong) mindset, hurting himself brings sexual gratification. But he would never do anything risky, painful, or dangerous with you. The thought of accidentally hurting you is one that he suppresses deeply; if he did something to hurt the only good thing in the world, the only good thing to ever happen to him, he would... well. You can use your imagination. :(

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He’s not a young man anymore! He may be Joker, and his lack of medications may increase his libido, but he can’t come multiple times. His refractory period lasts at least a couple hours, if not a day.

Many times, Joker may come prematurely and end your intimacy early with his sour or blue mood. You’re his first, so the first few times, he did come before you. (It’s a sore point for him, his novice. Dr. Sally’s radio show can only help so much.) But once he becomes more experienced with you, it’s easier to maintain his stamina. When he gets too close, his fingers will work your most pleasurable spots to make you come before he spills inside you. 

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

None by any traditional measures. But Joker’s .38 pistol is a prop that excites him. Never fully unloaded, its inherent danger never fails to make his cock harden. He’ll press the barrel against his skin and run it over his body, achingly slowly. Dragging a trail from his temple, down his neck, over his hollow stomach. By the time it's rubbing along his cock, Joker is fully erect. And craving more. He will ache to shoot it into some harmless space in the room, solely for the heat that would emanate from it. The heat had warmed his perpetually cold hands when he had killed those men on the subway, though he didn’t notice until later. That warmth pressed against his most sensitive place would thrill him. Joker craves it.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He stumbles into teasing unintentionally. Trying to prolong your encounter, he’ll hold off on making you come. His fingers slipping away from your clit when you get loud and fervent, jittering hips slowing down to restrained grinding when he himself can’t hold back. Joker doesn’t realize the effect it has on you. At first. The mischievous smile on his face when he realizes you like being teased could excite stone. 

Quickly, he starts experimenting. He sees how far he can push you, the kind of noises you’ll make if he keeps you from coming once, twice, thrice. If he whispers taunts or sinful things in your ears until you whine. If he ignores your begging for his touch until he himself breaks and makes love to you for an hour. It makes him feel powerful, holding your orgasm entirely in his control. He feeds on it, and it compels him to do it more. Whether the electricity inside him is from his own arousal or lovingly torturing you, who knows. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Having spent his entire life living with his mother, in an apartment with paper-thin walls, he learned early on how to keep quiet. As Joker, he’s still innately quiet during sex. But when he gets close, or particularly passionate, he’ll lose control. Heavy breathing becomes impassioned moans; grunts become gasps in pleasure; growls are huffed into your neck as he presses himself as close against you as he physically can. 

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Maybe not a sexy headcanon, but being too affectionate with Arthur, sexually or just romantically, will frustrate him and could send him into a black mood. Not because of your love―he craves it―but because he doesn’t understand. This is something that transcends either of his identities. 

He doesn’t understand what you see in a fuck-up like him. 

He doesn’t understand why you seem to love him so much. 

He doesn’t understand why he couldn’t have met you before his life went completely to shit.

 He doesn’t understand why he just can’t fucking appreciate the only good thing to ever happen to him.

It confuses him. These feelings might come out in a fight, or through gritted teeth during pillow talk after a heated encounter. It’s times like these he wishes he still had a therapist. Joker never wants your sweet love to change; it’s just difficult navigating these new feelings.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

With handsome veins running along it, and a gentle curve upwards, Joker’s cock is only slightly longer than average. Mournfully, he has no foreskin; consequently sensation is dulled along his frenulum. His pleasant girth stretches your walls. Testes sag slightly, loose sensitive skin stretching from the base of his cock. His left is larger than his right.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Sans medications, Joker can never keep his hands off you. When his mood is high, he’ll push you against the nearest hard surface for a passionate fuck as often as you’re willing. But when his manic bursts pass and he’s struggling with black moods again, his sex drive takes a nosedive. Though he doesn’t have that same passion and need to be inside you, Joker still makes love to you often. Not for his own craving, but for the comfort of your body, and the intimacy of proximity that brings him solace in the dead of lonely night. 

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He never falls asleep after sex, not even when he was still Arthur. Joker’s insomnia medication used to help somewhat, but he has no medications now. After sex, he’ll be buzzing like a livewire, full of energy and pride in his ability to get you off. It keeps him drunk on satisfaction. If it wasn’t for his refractory period, he would pull you on top of him again immediately after for another round. But as it is, Joker is content to hold you close while you wind down. Your soft conversation in the intimacy of the afterglow makes him feel almost normal. Not Joker, not Arthur, just yours.