#but we cannot be. idk a person and be ourselves
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We always feel like we’re just piloting the body and not actually livin. it’s probably why we’re so ready to die
#we’re so tired mad#tired of. well. being alive#it DOESNT bring us any joy. I feel like no one hears us when we say this#we don’t want to do thjs anymore man#the only thing we’re living for is other people.#we just want to lay down and sleep all day#we don’t want to have to eat#we don’t want to draw or listen to music or play video games or read#we just#want to sleep#is that so bad#but we’ll miss ppl ig#not I guess we will. that’s a fact and one of the biggest reasons we’re still here#but we cannot be. idk a person and be ourselves#we don’t know how to mask#it hurts to just lay here and moving hurts and everything hurts#we keep forgetting simple things. our eyes are being weird#we. we are dead. we’re just#rotting#in this room. waiting to get sick enough that we die without having to kill ourseslves like#this is obvious. if ppl wouldn’t hound us over it we’d probably just try to starve but also hunger is natural#we want to say. this’ll be better. but we realized. being around our family doesn’t. do anything#the idea of living makes us upset#we don’t want anything else but to die and the fact that we can’t even have that is cruel and selfish of everyone else#we’re starting to resent everyone for not letting us just kill ourselves#but we know what its like to lose someone to suicide so it’s like. let’s just okay the waiting game why don’t we#we. don’t believe things will get better#we don’t want them to because it means ghag. this was all for nothing#we’d rather be somebodies tragic backstory than be an active participant in our own life#suicide tw
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and if i quit art to go make a stsg dating sim rpg (they can only court each other)
#i need my personal laptop to Stop being broken first#me: u cannot purchase a new laptop when fixing it will cost like 500 u cannot waste#me who is simply untrusting of all the computer repair shops around: ….fine no game time ever then#congrats i fking uninstalle discord and it uninstalled windows as well or something and then the screen broke and it got infested by mold#mites during my apartments 80 % humidity era#that i for whatever reason did not know how to fix#bc no lets give ourselves lung infections before we buy a dehumidifier#or idk crack open a window#fking dumbass era
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#TAGS TLDR YOU CAN NEVER TRULY GO HOME BUT DO YOU WANT TO?#writing a little for d&d and having feelings about this#it was really interesting jasper and i were working on some game mechanics and we kept getting stuck at weird parts and it developed into#this conversation where we realized we experience the world#in such fundamentally different ways. like specifically talking about how paranoia#manifests and stuff but even later in a broader sense like our experiences of time and everything is so different#and they'd be like 'well what if this is something that happened to lock' and id be like 'how could that be something that anyone would#experience' and they were like 'oh because i do'#(example here was my character not realizing he had been magically transported and filling in the blank with vague memories of travel but i#was like. are you not acutely aware of every single moment you are awake and in motion even if it is excruciatingly boring. and jasper#was like. 'oh...no. i could be transported from one place to another and if time passed i wouldnt even think about having traveled or not'#which was WILD to me but then we were like 'okay i guess this cannot be something that happened to lock' because i couldnt even fathom that#but like anyway idk we got weirdly deep dive-y about d&d stuff and personal lives and i had big feelings on it bc genuinely i feel like#there are facets and caverns in myself i have only ever touched in storytelling but particularly in this campaign#and i've joked a lot about Lock and other chars in this game being self inserts#but i mean it in a good way#like the ways we tell stories or experience a world we created together is going to be through an extension of ourselves etc#but it's interesting to me to consider the limitations that brings yknow? we all live by such vastly different sets of rules and#understandings#and im writing out some stuff now and im like. yknow.#lock can never truly go home. i can never truly go home. none of us can ever truly go home#home as shifting impermanence home as transience etc#2017 levi is back apparently but hes always been right
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apartment hunting is hell in case anyone was wondering 👍
#there's nothing like dorms here if you don't get an apartment the school website basically says idk you're fucked get an airbnb or something#one fifth of the applicants for the main student apartment provider get an apartment for the semester so that's awesome#though i do qualify for the city's housing specifically aimed at low-income tenants with flying colors so i gotta apply there tmrw#every website keeps trying to get me to do the thing where you just rent out a room in a bigger apartment but all of them also tack on that#if you have mental health issues you probably should not do that esp with strangers. so fuck me then i guess#not that i wanna do that it sounds like my fucking nightmare i am not a communal kitchen person but goddamn give me another option then#the school links a couple of other housing websites aimed at students but all of them put a fucking insane markup on rent for literally the#same apartments as the cheaper provider and that i cannot in any universe afford should we all just kill ourselves
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#koi talks#I will admit we sometimes go into syscourse tags just to see what's happening over there#however it just leaves us feeling so so tired#we all have way bigger problems and I literally cannot be asked to keep up#like omg who cares#we're traumagenic* and I can tell you we don't care#(* we don't really like labeling ourselves like that we don't find it helpful)#whether they just 'don't remember' or legitimately created their system who cares !#it feels so so similar to queer discourse#*grabbing your shoulders gently* look at me. listen.#they're after all of us#they don't like any of us they don't accept any of us#splitting us up into ''real systems'' and ''fake systems'' is only going to get us farther in the short-term#but if/when we get disordered systems widely accepted where will the rest of us be?#where will the systems who like being systems be left? where will we go?#it's not all sunshine and rainbows fucking obviously#but personally? at our core we were created to protect and comfort a baby going through unstable and unsafe times#we're family whether we like it or not and we don't want to lose each other#idk where I was going with this honestly#we call ourselves neutral bc we don't have time to care usually#but we also stay away from people who don't want 'pro-endos' interacting just bc#we're very much radically inclusive that's basically what I'm saying#as long as you're not actively hurting anyone do whatever you want forever
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hiii we still just need $25 urgently, because we are OUT of the medication which keeps us both off of feeding tubes and out of the hospital
We have a little bit of money left, but not enough for a refill.
$25 is the bare minimum we need; $40 would be ideal-- but we NEED to go get some TODAY, and 25 is an easier goal to meet. so we will take absolutely whatever we can get. Even if you've only got 5 or 10 to spare that gets us a LOT closer than we were a minute prior 💖
Please reblog 🙏 I know everyone is struggling more and more, and this time of year is always especially tight, but a mere 25 bucks can literally help save the lives of 2 trans people right now and I'm not joking. I really wish I was.
my bday is on nov 15th!! 🎉 it would be ideal not to have to beg for my life for my bday gift, but alas, my bf and I are two homeless, disabled transmascs who have been trying to get back on our feet for over a year. especially in the shadow of the us election, our futures are very uncertain, but we are resolved to live + stay Out no matter what happens. theyre stuck here with us, too >:)
our short term goal is just to get enough $ to pay for meds and the phone bill, maybe $150- just enough to survive the month. I have a rare disorder that doctors refuse to treat, and my med regimen is just barely keeping me off a feeding tube and is ofc not covered by insurance
I don't have much on my WL right now, but being able to manage my pain would be nice <3 we live on less than $3 per person per day, so a little goes a long way for us!!! even $5 or $10 makes a huge difference!
[ 🫐 paypal ] will go further but we also have [ cshpp🐛 ] 💖✌️
#me#was not gonna say anything but im kinda seething about kaijuno rn#big popular Tumblr user who has been 'about to be evicted next month' for over a year#and also just posted that she got an AI job she admittedly was unqualified for#so she has a job. working in ai. she is not about to be evicted.#and i kinda dont care about that. if you have to lie to get money you probably need it#but she HAS a fucking job and i dont#she HAS housing and i already lost mine#she got to keep her fucking cat. and her car. i didnt.#but i bet she gets hundreds in donos every month just bc her blog is so huge#meanwhile ppl are still whining about seeing Palestinians fundraisers 🙄#its just so gross that Palestinians and homeless ppl in america alike have to lay ourselves bare and be so humiliated to be believed#yet somehow someone with a job and a house can lie about being one of us for over a year a profit way more.#yeah it probably does get more donations to just say HELP IM ABOUT TO BE EVICTED both bc ppl relate more and bc it sounds more dire#when i take the time to type 10 paragraphs about what my rare disorder is. that loses people's attention unfortunately#idk im just cranky#20 bucks shouldn't be so hard to come by but i have to spend days fundraising for that#Palestinians trying to escape a warzone have to spend days raising that amount#and white housed tumblr users are over here exploiting the fear of that situation for financial gain they dont need any more than we do.#yeah that does actually bother me.#i really dont usually mind if homeless ppl lie to get money.#like you do not owe it to anyone to say how you spend your donations. other ppl cannot dictate that for you.#I care if youre lying *about being homeless* to get said money. thats disgusting. you are so fucked for doing that actually.#bc ppl scrutinize homeless ppl so hard and wanna micromanage us if we buy a juice instead of water or some shit.#lying about what the money is for -> dont care do ur thing#lying about why you need help and claiming youre more vulnerable than you are to get more help than you need -> actually asshole behavior#idk maybe that's very crabs in a bucket of me. you can have a job and still be poor. nobody MAKES me share true details i just choose to#i also dont think Palestinians or anyone else should feel compelled to share so many personal details about whats wrong to get help.#its humiliating and i think its smth that speaks loudly to the need of having to fundraise to survive at all.#and idk probably wouldn't have much crossover btwn her followers and mine so its not like shes taking donos *from* me personally
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It's always a bit... annoying? Weird? Idk. Whenever a person who isn't AroAllo comes into the tags and asks a questions for AroAllos (which is fine), that there's always aces in the notes responding with something like "I'm ace/asexual but..."
No "but" this question isn't for you?? Why do you feel so comfortable talking over AlloAros in our own spaces??
It's weird. How can you read "Question for AroAllos!" or anything similar and think to yourself "well, I'm not that, but I'll still answer!" Why? Why can't you just... not do that? Especially when it's a question specifically about sex or sexual attraction and you just derail it into something completely different, especially something explicitly non-sexual?? What is the thought process there. Genuinely, I cannot understand this.
Maybe just let AlloAros answer. You'll live if you scroll past the question or just reblog without comment or tag an AroAllo person who's open to answering questions (and if you can't even name one, just... perhaps... don't even think about answering the question) or do anything but speak over AlloAros. I promise. It'll be fine. We don't need you talking over us, and we certainly don't need you to keep spreading misinformation (which is something that happens basically every time, even if you don’t mean to).
We can talk for ourselves just fine. If you actually want to help, listen to us, and spread our voices instead of talking over us.
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— DAUGHTER OF THE MOON (II)
PART ONE || PART THREE
PAIRING — Sauron x fem!Elf!Reader (Celebrimbor's Daughter)
SUMMARY — Annatar manages to seduce Lord Celebrimbor's daughter but her visions might interfere with his plans. Unless he can make her believe that the evil her mother was warning her about is nobody else but Lord Celebrimbor himself.
AUTHOR’S NOTE — Reader's appearance is not described and her mother comes from a group of Elves that I came up with myself for the sake of this fic and its plot – the Moon Elves. I made Mirdania a bit of a mean girl here and idk I kinda feel bad about it but I also kinda don't lmao 🤣
WARNINGS — Reader's mother is dead ("madness" + suicide), manipulation, gaslighting, Reader has a vision / "is going mad" (she's basically Mirdania in this scene)
WORD COUNT — 5,190
ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.
DAUGHTER OF THE MOON (II)
Lady (Y/N) interpreted his forehead kiss as both, so it seemed – both the blessing and the sign of his personal adoration. Whenever Annatar looked at her now, she was looking down, shyly. He could hear her heartbeat quicken its pace and he had to fight very hard not to smirk.
In fact, he was seeing her more often now. She was finding excuses to visit her father in the forge nearly every day and Celebrimbor was too busy to notice that his daughter was acting unusual and strange.
One time, Annatar overheard two women gossiping about his new friend’s daughter.
“Lady (Y/N) seems to be quite fascinated with Lord Annatar,” one of them chuckled quietly, not knowing that he was standing nearby. “Did you see her yesterday? Bumping into him as if it was an accident… She is not an actress good enough to pull that off.”
“Oh, I did see. I do wonder what her excuse will be today,” the other one giggled and covered her mouth. “He is so kind and patient for not rejecting her already because she is starting to get annoying.”
“Well, she is Lord Celebrimbor’s daughter. I suppose he cannot just–”
“Please,” her friend interrupted her. “He is the emissary of the Valars. He is above Lord Celebrimbor,” she insisted and Annatar could hear jealousy in her voice. He knew her because he worked with her in the forge. Her name was Mirdania and she had a crush on him – as silly as it sounded but it was true.
He was trying to charm everyone but it was not his intention to bring the romantic feelings out of his every victim. However, sometimes, not everything was going perfectly well and according to the plan.
“I cannot blame her,” Mirdania’s friend added, sadly. “Lady (Y/N) has been in so much pain after her mother’s passing and her father has always been the most overprotective but also neglecting her because of his work. Lord Annatar is the very first man her father trusts around his daughter and who pays her so much attention.”
“It is not very kind to gossip about your Lord’s daughter like that,” Annatar decided to step in with his hands clasped behind his back. His smile was gentle but his eyes showed a bit of harshness as both of the women looked at him in terror.
“L-lord Annatar…” Mirdania bowed down. “Forgive me, my Lord, I… We…”
“We have so much to do and I am certain that gossipping is not something we should bother ourselves with whenever we get a free moment for ourselves,” he insisted, calmly.
They both walked away as fast as possible, ashamed and with their heads kept low.
Jealousy was an ugly thing, Annatar thought. Lady (Y/N) was the most special woman inside this city – half Moon Elf after her mother, with powerful blood inside her veins and her hands blessed with so many talents. She was also a daughter of the Lord of this city and she had the biggest amount of power out of all women there. Of course they were jealous of her but they did not fear her, therefore instead of admiring her, they were whispering such nasty things.
Annatar felt bad for (Y/N) in a way. She deserved so much better and he would give it to her. He was sure that she would never deny such a gift.
“Lord Annatar!” Her voice made him turn around with a wide and kind smile. Here she was, walking towards him with her skirts gathered in her hands and yet another excuse to spend time with him on that day just like the gossipping women had suspected.
“My Lady,” he nodded at her. “What has caused you to come here and bless me once more with the sight of you?”
Oh, how she loved those compliments and sweet assurances. She froze for a moment and looked away, flustered. Her breath was becoming faster and her hands started to tremble a little.
“I was on my way to see my father,” she lied, “but seeing you on my way is a blessing as well, my Lord,” she gave him a shy smile and walked past him, very slowly.
Annatar closed his eyes for a moment, inhaling her scent. Then, he grabbed her wrist and made her stop as he opened his eyes once again and met her confused gaze.
“Please, my sweet (Y/N), you do not have to address me so formally,” he insisted. “I am Annatar to you. No Lord.”
She gasped a little and then she nodded her head as her lips curled up into a wide grin.
“Annatar,” she repeated his name. Devotion and sweetness were so audible in it that he wondered how could she not be ashamed of them but perhaps she was not even realising it.
Perhaps she needed one more push.
He visited her once again in her chambers in the evening. Actually, he had been doing that very often these days as they talked and she kept revealing to him nearly every moment of her life. So innocently handing herself out to him on a silver plate.
She opened the doors without a word and nothing but a smile. She was no longer surprised by his visits and she had been awaiting him, it was obvious. Her workshop was no longer messy and the gowns she was wearing in the evenings were the most exquisite. Even the jewellery she was wearing – her own creations – were breathtaking whenever it was time for his nightly visit.
Their shared moments were of a nocturnal nature and they both preferred it this way although the reasons differed for them both. She was simply a half Moon Elf and he was the Dark Lord. Nevertheless, under the moonlight they both thrived and so did their bond.
(Y/N) stood on the balcony as Annatar followed her there, watching the moonlight dancing in the light that reflected upon her hair.
“You are breathtaking,” he gasped and perhaps his reactions were exaggerated but he truly meant his words.
Of course, Celebrimbor’s daughter was a prize. And a woman of such power and such potential was an ally he wanted by his side no matter what. But still, with time, he grew quite affectionate towards her in the most genuine manner. Her innocence seemed to draw him in.
“Annatar, please,” she shook her head and looked away with a nervous smile. “Do not…”
“Why not?” He stood even closer as he put his hand on her arm. She flinched slightly, trying to get away from him but he stood behind her and even though he was gentle, now his body was completely over hers and keeping her still, making it unable for her to walk away without his permission.
“When you finish your work with my father… You will leave us, right?” She asked and swallowed thickly, fighting the tears in her eyes. “And what will be left of me then? I cannot handle another loss,” she confessed.
Annatar stood there still as a short silence occurred. He let her sob in his arms as he caressed her shoulders before leaning in to whisper into her ear.
“I would not be the first emissary of the Valars who chose to stay in Middle-earth because of a woman,” he confessed.
“Because of a woman?” She asked as she looked up to meet his gaze. She stopped sobbing but her forehead was furrowed and he realised that the word he had used was not the most proper.
“Because of love,” he fixed himself and raised his hand to wipe her cheek. Her tears felt like little stars upon his fingers in the moonlight.
“Oh, Annatar, I–” she gasped but he did not let her finish as he leaned in to join their lips together.
She turned around in his arms as he loosened the grip for her to be able to do so. Her own arms wrapped around him nearly desperately as her kiss grew more and more hungry. She would give herself to him right there, right now, on the balcony under the moonlight. And he would not mind that at all but he had to play the role of a pure and noble creature, therefore he took a step back, breaking the kiss.
“My Lady, we shall not,” he breathed out.
“Forgive me, I do not know what has possessed me,” Lady (Y/N) shook her head, embarrassed of herself. Still ashamed, she walked past him and went back inside.
He observed her. She felt so stupid for her behaviour that she nervously grabbed the small chisel on her desk and went back to some of the work she had abandoned throughout the day, trying to grind the piece of diamond laying on the table nearby.
Annatar leaned in on the wall as he watched her with a gentle smile. Her nervousness was making her look even more adorable but to witness her creation was as fascinating as watching her father.
As her skillful hands worked quickly, she suddenly hissed out of pain and dropped the chisel. Annatar furrowed his brows out of worry and found himself by her side in an instant.
“(Y/N), my darling,” he put his arm around her and raised her hurt hand up as he glanced upon the precious blood leaking out of the fresh wound. “You ought to be more careful, my sweet,” he swallowed thickly and even though he wanted to look into her eyes while saying those words, he couldn’t stop staring at the red liquid staining more and more of her hand.
“I just… I do not know what to think of all of this. Who am I for you to forsake the Valars for me?” Her eyes filled with tears and this finally made him look up to meet her gaze.
“Who are you?” Annatar asked gently and cupped her face. “The grandest of the Elven maidens, Lady (Y/N) of Eregion, creator of the most beautiful artistry that is admired in all the realms. Daughter of Lord Celebrimbor and Lady Dúlinnel, granddaughter of Lord Commander Nillendur. The very last Moon Elf of Middle-earth,” he spoke these things with all confidence and devotion as she kept blinking her tears away and staring at him.
“And what is all of this to a man like you?” She asked, still unsure.
“You are everything to me,” he whispered, joining their lips together once more.
Celebrimbor was in his study. It was late at night as he liked to work in silence and solitude. He was looking through the pages full of drawings and projects when he heard the doors creaking and then the footsteps.
“Who is it?” He asked as he stood up to approach the railing of the stairs leading up to his study from the forge.
“It is only I,” Lady (Y/N) smiled at him as she walked inside but then another person walked right after.
“And I,” Lord Annatar announced his arrival.
“Oh, I see,” Celebrimbor did not mind their presence out of all people. In fact, they were the closest to him. Therefore, he went back to his desk and his papers.
But when Annatar and (Y/N) stood above him, arm to arm, he raised an eyebrow at them, curiously.
“What is it again?” He sighed a little, expecting them both to try to talk him into doing something or to stop him from doing something. These past few weeks, they had become quite close and (Y/N) often accompanied Annatar when he was trying to convince her father to his ideas.
“My dear friend, we have come here with nothing but our love for you in our hearts… And a hope that you would choose to bless us,” Annatar spoke softly as (Y/N) only stood there. It was her idea that he should be the one to speak because his words were like honey.
“Bless you in what?” Celebrimbor asked, confused.
“I wish to make your sweet and precious daughter my wife,” Annatar announced softly as his lips curled up into a smile. (Y/N) held her breath, watching her father’s reaction closely.
And there was a lot to watch – Celebrimbor’s mouth opened, then closed. He looked around only to lay their eyes upon them once more. His face went a shade paler and he was visibly shocked.
“But… That would mean that…” He could not find the right words.
“That would mean that I would choose to stay in this form and live the rest of my days in Middle-earth alongside your daughter, yes,” Annatar nodded and (Y/N) looked up at him lovingly. “I am aware of the consequences of my choice, however the Valars would never go against love so pure and they have already blessed us themselves,” he lied so beautifully and (Y/N)’s eyes filled with tears at those words.
“Well, if the Gods themselves have blessed you, I cannot say no,” the Lord of Eregion chuckled nervously as he laid his eyes upon his daughter. “My darling, are you sure?” He asked, a little nervously.
“What do you mean, father?” She gasped, wrapping her hands around Annatar’s arm.
“I mean… It is rather quick…” He tried to make a reasonable excuse for his slight suspicions.
“You fell in love with my mother the moment you saw her, did you not?” (Y/N) reminded him in a gentle voice and Celebrimbor smiled at that sadly as he looked away.
He remembered the very first time he had seen his future wife – bathing in the moonlight on her balcony. She had not seen him but he spotted her, on the highest tower of one of the most beautiful mountain cities of her kin.
“Yes, I did,” he nodded and looked up at Annatar and (Y/N) again. “I bless you. It is an honour to give my daughter to a man like you, Lord of Gifts,” he smiled at his new friend and Annatar smiled back. “I shall throw you a feast to announce the betrothal,” he announced happily and his daughter’s eyes sparkled a little, too.
“My friend, please, do not,” Annatar winced as both Celebrimbor and (Y/N) froze slightly. “This is not a proper time to throw feasts for it is a privilege to be able to celebrate anything when so many people suffer now in Mordor,” Annatar reminded them. “I am of a humble nature, too, I do not require such festivities. Your daughter’s love is all I need and I am aware she prefers peace and solitude as well,” he looked down at (Y/N) and she cracked an affectionate smile at him.
“I understand,” Celebrimbor nodded. “And when do you wish to be wed? In a year as the custom says?”
“Perhaps sooner. When the Rings are forged and we can all truly celebrate,” Annatar proposed.
Surprisingly, despite his friend’s surprised expression, there was no audible protest.
“Dwarves and Elves working together. It was said to be impossible, but our cooperation has achieved this wonder,” Celebrimbor spoke from the top of the stairs to the gathered Dwarves on his left and the Elves on his right. And in front of him, with their own goblets of wine, stood Lord Annatar and Lady (Y/N), wearing each other’s silver rings now. “And today, we embark upon a new dream, to enshrine our friendship in stone,” he glanced upon his friend and daughter.
Lady (Y/N) reached out to squeeze Annatar’s forearm and he looked down at her with an affectionate smile.
“Narvi?” Celebrimbor addressed one of the Dwarves and walked down to join the rest.
“Behold!” Narvi announced as he stepped out and grabbed the rope on the ground to pull it and reveal Celebrmibor’s new work of art. “The Doors of Durin!” The Dwarf introduced the beautifully carved doors made of stone. “The new West-gate of our mountain. Unbreachable. Visible only by moonlight and guarded by a password known only to friends.”
“It is a craft my father has learnt from my mother’s kin,” Lady (Y/N) whispered to Annatar and he smiled softly at her. Her eyes sparkled as she mentioned that, remembering the love her parents had shared.
Truly believing that her own would be the same.
But as her father chatted and kept making lighthearted jokes, Annatar pretended to be not impressed as he moved away. (Y/N) tried to stop him but he shook her hand off.
“I need some air,” he told her and when she furrowed her brows and wanted to follow him, he turned around to stop her. “Please, I want to be alone. I shall come to you later,” he told her.
He knew that the conversation he would have with Celebrimbor now would not be of the nicest kind, therefore he did not want her to witness it.
“If that is your wish,” (Y/N) looked down and he could sense that she felt rejected, so he grabbed her wrist to hold it lovingly.
“I am not angry with you, my love. It is the burdens of far greater matters than the two of us that I have to carry,” he explained.
“I am aware,” she nodded, relaxing her muscles. She nodded at him with a shy smile. “I shall retire to my chambers and wait for your visit.”
And so she did but when he came back to her, his mood was somehow even worse and she only watched with terror as he kept talking to her about her father’s stubbornness when it came to the Rings for men.
“Was he not lying to the High King himself about the Rings for the Dwarves, defending them?” (Y/N) was as outraged as her betrothed. “And now he is showing such hypocrisy by denying you… The emissary of the Valars… Oh, Annatar, I am so ashamed of him!” She exclaimed. “It is as if he denied the Gods themselves!”
“Do not worry, my darling,” Annatar approached her to caress her arms soothingly. “I told him already I shall be the one to create those rings then and as I said, I shall do.”
“But… But can you?” She asked, shyly, as she looked up. “I mean, if you could do it yourself, you would have done that already without his help.”
“I do not know… But I have to try for all the people suffering now after Mordor’s rise,” he explained.
“If I can be of any help… Talk to my father to try to reason with him or perhaps there is something else I could do…” (Y/N) started as Annatar smirked a tiny bit, knowing very well she was too affected now to even notice.
It was too early to ask her for such a sacrifice, though. She would get suspicious because she was sensitive about the matter. She knew the dark history of the Moon Elves and she was afraid of becoming the darkness that so many of them had been naturally inclined to.
No, he had to wait some more time.
“Do not worry about it, please,” Annatar shook his head and kissed her forehead. “Have your faith in me and I shall be alright.”
Celebrimbor was sitting upstairs and staring at his papers but the only thing he could focus on were the sounds coming from the forge as his smiths were trying to create the Rings with Lord Annatar’s help. He could hear that they were not doing well and his new friend was growing frustrated but he also did not want to give up and help them.
After hearing Annatar scolding Mirdania gently, Celebrimbor stood up with a sigh and approached the railing as he leaned on it to watch more intensely. Annatar looked up at him as his eyes intensified but then they both looked away, avoiding each other’s uncomfortable gaze.
The usual noises of the forge were suddenly interrupted by a loud scream of terror coming from the outside. Everyone froze, staring at each other’s faces. Lord Celebrimbor’s heart skipped a beat as he recognised the scream immediately. He rushed down the stairs and spotted nothing but fear and worry on Annatar’s face as the scream was familiar to him as well.
“Lady (Y/N)...” Annatar whispered, dropping down his hammer and hurrying to the doors, giving a perfect show of nothing but pure concern.
Truth to be told, he was a little worried. He had no idea what could have caused her scream of terror but he knew one thing – that was not a part of his plan.
He was running towards the tower where she resided, with her father hurrying right after him. The people of Eregion were staring up and whispering between each other, curiously and worryingly.
Annatar and Celebrimbor opened the doors leading to (Y/N)’s workshop and they saw her standing in the middle of it as shattered gemstones laid upon her feet all around the floor. She was squeezing a small hammer in her trembling hands as if she was trying to protect herself with it from something and her hair was ruffled while her cheeks were wet from tears. She was gasping for air and took a step back at their rapid arrival to her chambers.The way she presented herself at that moment was the most pitiful.
“My darling… Breathe…” Celebrimbor took a step further and tried to approach his daughter calmly with his hand extended, wanting her to give him back the hammer. (Y/N) was looking around, lost and stressed, squeezing the hammer even tighter. “My sweet child, please, I do not want you to hurt yourself,” Celebrimbor’s voice filled with pain.
After a while of hesitation, as the feeling of confusion was slowly disappearing and her breath was calming down, (Y/N) handed the hammer back to her father.
“What happened?” He asked, taking it away from her immediately.
“I was in a place like this, but shrouded in mist and darkness, and…” (Y/N) struggled to explain, shaking her head. Her wet eyes found Annatar’s worried ones. “I saw, I…” She looked back at her father. “At first, I thought it was the forge burning… But it wasn’t.”
“What was it?” Celebrimbor asked, calmly.
His daughter hesitated with the answer as she shot a quick glance at her betrothed. She was afraid of him thinking badly of her – that she was descending into madness like her mother.
“I saw what mother had been seeing,” (Y/N) whispered as she looked down. “It was tall… and its skin was made of flames,” she continued but her gaze was being kept down, so he could not see the burning intensity of her lover’s gaze upon her. “It came toward me, breathing, reeking of death and I saw… I… I saw its eyes. Pitiless and eternal…” She began to sob again as she hid her face in her hands. “I think mother was right… It is here, it is already here…”
“My love, please,” Annatar moved finally as he approached (Y/N) softly to put his hands on her trembling arms. “You are with us now. There is nothing to fear,” he tried to comfort her in a delicate whisper as he looked up at Celebrimbor.
His friend was speechless and scared. Annatar understood why – he had lived through this before with his own wife and her ending had been nothing but tragic. Seeing the same thing happening again to his daughter had to be traumatic. And even though Annatar did not like the fact that Lady Dúlinnel and her daughter had visions warning them about him, he was sure he could still use their abilities in his game.
“Look around, my gentle darling,” Annatar whispered to his betrothed and lifted her chin up. “All is well, my love,” he smiled kindly at her and she sniffled her tears back before reaching her hands out to squeeze his desperately, seeking comfort. “All is well, I am here…” He assured her and gave her hands a gentle squeeze back.
“You must think so lowly of me now,” her lower lip trembled once more.
“No. No, my darling, no, how could I?” Annatar extended his hand out to caress her wet cheeks, glancing at her father from the corner of his eyes. Celebrimbor could do nothing but stare, being eaten alive by guilt that he could not offer the same comfort to his daughter but he was too scared and too shocked to even move slightly as he was still squeezing (Y/N)’s small hammer in his hands.
“You are the most understanding,” she sniffled her tears and closed her eyes as she leaned her cheek on Annatar’s hand. She looked so beautiful, he thought, with her cheeks wet from tears, while she was putting so much trust in him and him only.
As they stood there like that in silence, two guards stood in the doorway.
“My Lord, Celebrimbor,” one of the guards addressed him as he finally turned around to glance at them. “Forgive me, my Lord,” the guard bowed his head, “but Durin the Younger is arrived from Khazad-dûm.”
“No,” Celebrimbor shook his head, worryingly. “Tell him to wait, it is a family matter…”
“He says it is urgent. Something about the Rings,” the guard announced and now both Celebrimbor and Annatar seemed to be interested.
“I will see what he wants,” Annatar stepped out, moving his hands away from (Y/N).
“No,” Celebrimbor looked at him and put the hammer down on his daughter’s desk. “No, you stay here with (Y/N) for you are a far better comfort to her than I am these days. I will go,” he smiled widely at his friend but Annatar could sense that the Lord of Eregion was hiding something from him.
“Very well then,” Annatar nodded with a fake smile as well and he watched Celebrimbor disappear with the guards before turning around to look at his betrothed again. “My darling, sit,” he hurried back to her side and helped her to sit down on the armchair near the balcony as he opened the doors to let the fresh air inside. “Rest, gather your strength and your thoughts, I am not going anywhere,” he assured her and squeezed her hands lovingly as she looked up at him with the most devoted and affectionate eyes.
“Thank you,” she breathed out.
Annatar caressed her head and looked down at the mess on the floor. He quickly cleaned it up, making an impression of someone who would always pick up the broken glass pieces and calmly deal with the aftermaths of trouble. And once it was all done and the bigger gemstone pieces recovered from the dust were placed upon her desk, he took a deep breath in and walked outside to stand on the balcony to overhear the conversation between Celebrimbor and Durin from afar.
And just like he suspected, that awful Dwarf not only had arrived there to complain about the Ring seeming to be corrupted but he also dared to accuse him – Annatar himself, an emissary of the Valars – of having bad intentions.
And Annatar knew that Celebrimbor’s mind was already trying to shut him off more and more often. Now, Durin’s words planted yet a new seed of mistrust. Annatar was furious but he still had his plan B – sitting behind him and sniffling her tears away.
He composed himself and his angry facial expression turned into a soft one as he turned around to join (Y/N) in her chambers again. He crouched down next to her armchair and squeezed her arm.
“I am mad…” She whispered, feeling utterly defeated.
“No, you are not mad,” Annatar assured her, calmly. “You are very brave,” he caressed her arm now and reached all the way up to brush her cheeks with his fingertips. “Some who behold the Unseen world are never quite at home in this one again.”
“Like my mother?” (Y/N) turned her head around to look into his eyes with curiosity and desperation. She wanted answers to calm down and he would gladly give them to her.
“Yes, like your mother. She was not mad either. Simply… more delicate than you,” Annatar smiled at her, lovingly. “It is a gift to be able to see the Unseen world but it comes with a terrible price. A terrible burden,” he explained.
“Have you seen it, too?” (Y/N)’s eyes filled with pain and compassion for him even though she was the one who had just suffered.
“Yes,” Annatar nodded, softly. “In its light, things appear as they truly are. Beings of different shades of light…” His eyes wandered somewhere else, leaving her face and staring at the wall in front of him. “And its darkness…” He hesitated, making sure that she catches on to that and her curiosity would make her ask for more.
“There is something you hide from me, my love. Please, I wish to understand what has just happened to me… What happened to my mother,” (Y/N) reached her hands out to grasp his wrists and to lower them away from her face as she intertwined her fingers with his, looking down at them as she smiled sadly at the sight of their silver rings.
“It pains me to say…” Annatar faked as much suffering as he could in his eyes as he laid them upon her scared face. “For what you saw, I did not wish you to see, until I had helped him to heal.”
Long silence occurred and he could not only hear but also feel her heartbeat quickening its pace.
“You… You speak of my father?” (Y/N) asked, confused. “But we spoke about it, I suggested it in the very beginning and you–”
“I never denied it,” Annatar reminded her, his voice growing a tone harsher but not too much. He just wanted to emphasise his seriousness. “I simply changed the subject, I hoped to distract you because I did not want to worry you.”
“I… I do not understand…” She shook her head as fresh tears streamed down her cheeks.
“The toll that creation has exacted from him in crafting The Three and The Seven has left him diminished. Vulnerable to the shadow,” Annatar squeezed her hands to comfort her.
“But he created them because of you…” The glimpse of doubt and clarity in her eyes made him freeze for a moment as his jaw clenched.
“Your father is the greatest of the Elven smiths. The task given to him might be a burden but it is an honour. He was chosen by the Valars,” Annatar answered quickly. “Promise me, you’ll speak to no one about it, my love,” his voice turned much sweeter once again as he leaned in to be closer to her. “Including him.”
(Y/N) hesitated but having Annatar’s face so close to hers, to the point of their breaths mixing, his warmth comforting her and his hair brushing her cheeks while his gaze was the most intense. How could she ever say no to this man?
“I promise,” she breathed out and he cupped her face to pull her even closer and join their lips together in a loving, bittersweet kiss.
MASTERLIST
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idk if your still gonna answer asks about the situation but as a fellow trans person i need to explain something that i'm noticing a lot of people are not understanding (don't worry this isnt at you or anyone upset with cal) i'm seeing quite a few people go "she's sticking to her beliefs and being respectful! she's not being transphobic so what's the big deal!?" and i genuinely want the people saying this to read this post and take into consideration on why this doesn't make the situation any better her belief is a very outdated and also dangerous one because believing that there can only be a male and a female invalidates so many people (trans, enby, non-binary, intersex etc) and those beliefs can cause actual harm to people to the point of literal hate crimes, i'm sorry but you guys shouldn't give her a pat on the back for "sticking to her beliefs" because her beliefs are very, very harmful and i've even seen other christens disagree with her and try to explain to her why this is bad
secondly; there's also how she called trans people a label and used the term in quotation marks, we are not a label we are living breathing human beings who want to be happy with ourselves and have a right to exists thirdly and there's the elephant in the room... the twitter likes and follows, it's proven many times that cal has liked straight up horrible transphobic and homophobic tweets and even follows people like matt walsh who want lgbtq+ people dead, if anyone defending her didn't know about the twitter stuff then that's fine but if you did and still defend her then it's clear you guys are beyond help closing statement: the reason why people are very upset with cal is that she lied to so many trans people in the community with a cut and dry example of being two-faced, you simply cannot say you respect trans people and interact with them while also going out of your way to have a low-key transphobic belief, liking transphobic stuff and following transphobic people especially when undertale and deltarune cannonicly have lgbtq+ character (cal even drawing said lgbtq+ characters like undyne for example which i find rich since i've heard she doesn't like mlm and wlw ships) and the community having SO MUCH lgbtq+ people this isn't a "lets agree to disagree" situation, this isn't drama either, this is a very serious situation also i've seen people go "she hasn't said any hate in the past!" as an defense, sorry but that doesn't change anything... i think it just makes the fact that she fooled everyone worse anyway sorry for this lengthy asks, i'm too scared to make a post but also i've been very upset about the situation and wanted to get my thoughts out because the way people are defending her without understanding why this is actually very bad is making me facepalm so hard sincerely, a very emotional trans man
I really don't have anything to add. This is a pretty good summary of this whole thing.
#and anon 🫂#hug for you. i know a shit ton of us are in the same boat#hurt to hell and back because of her#we're all here for each other though#melons answers#anonymous
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Y'know--
Earlier this year we replied to a post by Foone Turing about Bejeweled and the fact that the game can be easily modded to become a hypno-conditioning game by editing the text files in Zen Mode.
The post broke containment and currently has about 11k notes.
Every now and again we get notifs and cannot help but check and though there's a lot of positivity in there, it always bums me out when I see people being squicked and ugly about it.
Like-- I'm sorry? My girlfriend and I like to do fun and suggestive things with a puzzle game? It's kind of weird how the words "obey" and "good girl" appearing on the screen when you solve a simple mindless puzzle game can cause people such revulsion.
Like-- we feel guilty about our interest in hypnokink. Way less than when it was bad enough that we had an entire dissociated state of self to interact with that side of our life so we didn't involve ourselves (Hi, Dawn!), but our shame and repulsion over topics of erotic intimacy are crippling at times. We're getting better but it's hard for us.
I hate that even though we gravitated to a niche that doesn't even require nudity or genital contact, it can still be met with such judgmental eyes and I sorta resent that our post gets that kind of engagement on a daily basis?
It's fine. We're fine. We're proud of our talent and our niche. It's why we run our blog like this. We don't WANT to hide in shame and pretend we're squeaky clean when we have our little interests. We wanna normalize this shit.
But-- it just-- I hate the reminders that it's abnormal and weird and gross to most people, y'know?
There's another "broke containment" post by-- a person-- about the rampant racism in the hypno-community. Which is still a problem, though since ROM was established to combat it-- it's gotten a bit better and all the replies were all this "GURL WAT!?" level knee-jerk disgust when it was a hypno-blogger, blogging about hypnosis, on their hypno-themed blog and talking about a serious topic which deeply impacts a lot of our more vulnerable members lives.
IDK... I just hate that kind of dismissive judgment, especially when you walk into someone else's house to do it.
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I'm having some thoughts and feelings, for reasons.
The feelings are that I'm so grateful for this beautiful fandom and the beautiful couple in the picture above. The thoughts are beneath the read more and can be taken or left. The picture cannot be left, however. Taken is the only option. You need to see it because look how cute they are!
For prosperity:
Something I always 'explore', if you will, in my own writing is how people process the concept of time. Endings, beginnings, the past and the future linking up. Your past self always being with you like a spectre. The present feeling like a marble rolling around a tube... I think this is because I'm not good with change or saying goodbye, but I do know that endings always lead to something else. Which is scary, because you don't necessarily know what that will bring.
Thinking about all of the above in terms of Lone Star is a different beast for me personally, because I've never had this kind of experience with a show or characters before, where I'm so compelled by it that I found my way into the fandom and have been creatively stimulated to the point of writing 25+ fics for it (which isn't nearly as many as others have produced! But to me it feels significant). So for that reason I want to say: When the show ends -(WHENEVER THAT MAY BE) - the characters don't. They don't end, not really. As long as we choose to keep talking about the themes, sharing meta posts, writing them or drawing them or creating gif sets, and revisiting them in rewatches or YouTube clips - there they are. Always. Either suspended in their moment and so easy to revisit in all their glory, or put in new situations in fic and art even years into the future. If this hiatus has taught us anything, it's that even without the show on air, there are still plenty of stories to tell and interpretations to be had, based on what came before. When the show ends, the thing that will unfortunately go is the speculation aspect, but what we have instead is a beautiful completed work that can inspire and be meaningful forever to those who already love it and for those who will find it in the future - and it will be found. Anything that exists can be found. (See: deep sea fish that glow in the dark (!)). And things that don't exist can be imagined.
We're so lucky to be the ones in the know when it comes to the show and to Tarlos. We know how special it is, what a gift it is. I'm not a spiritual person but I do feel oddly spiritual when it comes to this. Idk.
Something I've always hoped (as I'm sure we all have) is that we would know ahead of time that it's over. The show not being renewed between seasons is a thought that horrifies me to my core. I remember thinking towards the end of season 4: "At least if it doesn't get renewed, it ends with Tarlos being canon-married." Which, as a Tarlos super-fan, was my no.1. concern, but I love and care about the other characters too of course.
Going into season 5 and fearing it could be the last season, I had a huge tummy ache wondering if Tarlos would be on the rocks. If they ended on a cliffhanger having assumed season 6 was on the cards, we'd never get a resolution. But Rafa's Cameos have really eased my mind in that regard. Based not only on the tiny amount he's given away, but the way he talks about them loving each other, it sounds like they're going to be okay - and we're going to see it for ourselves that Tarlos really is endgame. In a time when hope is needed, we do have this. AND we have each other! As long as Tarlos ends happy, I for one intend to keep dancing, even if it means I'm the eccentric up on the table on my own doing the robot. But I would always like others to dance with.
Whatever happens, which we don't officially know yet, we can get through it together.
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MEDIA MANAGEMENT — JACK HUGHES (PART SIX)
one — two — three — four — five — 5.5 — six
notes: first photo was taken and sent to me by @/bellaxward on twitter, so creds to her! also, i’m sorry, i feel like this update isn’t the best but i’m running on like 3 hours of sleep and i was writing this bit by bit while super busy!
y/ndevils00
liked by tmeier96, ehaula, and 37,519 others
y/ndevils00 heyo! welcome back to my postgame boyfriend show! tonight the njdevils played against the spawns of satan (not trevor)! or.. i mean.. the new york rangers.
we start tonight’s recap off with a very cute picture i got of my boyfriend and his best friend (again; not trevor) talking about how much they love me during warmups!
we also have da sun showing me that the tooth fairy came to visit him awhile ago! i bet he got lots of money for his toofer, however i wouldn’t know because he’s stopped letting me steal his wallet.
our first goal of the night was a tip in by mr. haula at ya! followed up in the same period by a goal from timo time! notice how he made the post this time? that’s because unlike most of these idiots (i’m looking at you, marino 👀), timo takes me seriously!
however, immediately after timo’s goal, haulaback girl was placed in the sin bin for tripping. i was very disappointed and he got a very strict talking to during first intermission and assured me he wouldn’t get another penalty. he lied.
he got a penalty in second period for the exact same reason that he did in the first. i cannot promise i was as nice to him in the second intermission.
we got a few scrums in this game, but my personal favorite one was in third period and ended much too quickly for my liking. BOO, REFS!
and finally, we have some pictures of my gorgeous, talented, sometimes annoying babygirl… my boyfriend!
tagged jackhughes, dawson1417, ehaula, tmeier96, ryangraves27 and vitacz15
dawson1417 y/n, i never LET you steal my wallet. you would take it from my pocket and count my money and then give it back, like a thief that’s really bad at their job
y/ndevils00 i’m just a very curious person! i like to know everyone’s business, all the time. and you never told me to stop 🤷♀️
jackhughes if i remember correctly, dawson and i were actually discussing our plans for the off-season
y/ndevils00 you remember incorrectly
jackhughes did you just call me babygirl
y/ndevils00 you’re so babygirl
jackhughes thank you?
john.marino97 why does everyone else get normal penalty reactions but me?
user52 wait, did y/n ACTUALLY just talk to Haula?!
john.marino97 @/user52 yes!
user52 OH MY GOD JOHN ILY
y/ndevils00 because you’re my bff and i only want the best for you
john.marino97 every day i rethink why i decided to become one of your best friends
y/ndevils00 you love me
trevorzegras did you seriously just specify that you weren’t talking about me when you said spawn of satan?
y/ndevils00 i didn’t want anyone to get confused!
trevorzegras i don’t like you
y/ndevils00 wait really???
trevorzegras wait no y/n i’m sorry. i was just joking
y/ndevils00 📸 caught in 4k
trevorzegras i hope both sides of your pillow are hot tonight
tmeier96 i made the post!!
y/ndevils00 you did a good job with my demands 🫡 i love my blankie
ehaula second intermission… you’re scary
y/ndevils00 remember that.
ryangraves27 why did you have to do me like this?
y/ndevils00 idk what you mean 🤭
user6 y/n is a menace and i’m here for it
lhughes_06 do i get to be in these posts when i join?
y/ndevils00 moosey, you’ll replace jack as the star of the show
jackhughes now hold on! let’s not get ahead of ourselves here!
y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes i said what i said.
lhughes_06 @/jackhughes can we keep her?
jackhughes i intend to
nicohischier no feature for me tonight? i feel betrayed
y/ndevils00 i only have 9 picture slots bud, idk what to tell ya 🤷♀️
y/ndevils00 make a goal next time or something
nicohischier i’m gonna steal your cat
y/ndevils00 you wouldn’t!
nicohischier i probably wouldn’t even need to steal her. i bet jack would just give her to me.
y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes TELL HIM HE��S WRONG!
jackhughes …. no comment
y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes you’re sleeping on the couch
jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 that only hurts you babe. every time you say that, you end up dragging me in to the bed at like 2am because you can’t fall asleep without me
y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes you can’t cook broccoli.
jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 yes i can! i can now!
#media management series <3#jack hughes#jack hughes x reader#jack hughes blurb#jack hughes fic#jack hughes imagine#nj devils#new jersey devils#dawson mercer#john marino#trevor zegras#luke hughes#ryan graves#nico hischier#nhl imagine#nhl blurb#nhl fic#faithlynn’s insta edits <3#faithlynn’s writings <3
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The way you and @kneelingshadowsalome have written König has had a deep and profound effect on me. This man has such a deep yearning for love and to be loved in turn, and IDK I really adore that about him. I want to marry this man. I want to know his favorite meal so I can make it just the way he likes. I want to have him tell me every insecurity, show me every scar upon his soul so that I may kiss each one and tell him that much like a well worn jacket, i love him because of his issues, not inspite of them. I want to hold this man, have him bind himself to me, intertwine ourselves so deeply that we cannot ever part, not without losing something integral about ourselves. I would let him fuck my tits. It's giving me brainrot.
I sat here and read this like. four times. I say this about every nice ask but they're all just so special and important to me. Genuinely from the bottom of my heart thank you Dess and every other person who's taken time out of their day to send me something nice about my writing. 🥺
I've always thought this is the crux of König's appeal as a character. He's so riddled with red flags and problems, and he's only like that because he's constantly living in survival mode. We love him not because we want to fix him or make him something else, but because he's the equivalent of a street mutt who's been treated like a nuisance by almost every person he's come into contact with. You let the stray in because he's also a human being. Maybe he'll snap. Maybe he'll bring his demons in with him. But none of that matters: he is lovable the way he is.
Also he would LOVE to fuck your tits are you kidding me—
#RAUCOUS APPLAUSE#i love my readers/followers you are all so incredible and smart#könig#konig#könig cod#konig cod#cod#call of duty#answered#witchqueendess
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idk man if you're a trans dude, esp if you're a trans man who's attracted to other men, and the only queer spaces you regularly attend are very hard on "fuck all men" or "ew men are so gross" like.
you deserve better than that, and you should also be in other queer spaces
like absolutely, cishet men have treated basically all of us fuckin terribly and many people have trauma related to cishet patriarchy
but either you're being included in that hatred (bc you're a man) or you're being misgendered (bc you're not ~really~ a man)
and thats. bad.
like as a queer person you deserve to be in spaces where you're loved and celebrated and cared for in your entirety, not where you're expected to swallow that down
and i would say the same to trans girls or bi guys whose friends are like "ew pussy is gross" gays
i know the latter is a bit less common than it used to be? but nonetheless i will say it like. obviously trans dudes have cunts too, so its not just about the biphobia, but the biphobia IS real and you DO deserve better
we're queers bc we cannot fit into cishet society without compartmentalising ourselves and splitting ourselves into part - if the queer spaces you are in are forcing you to do that shit again, YOU NEED AND DESERVE BETTER SPACES
(and obviously this goes double triple quadruple if you're disabled and abled queers are treating your existence like its a chore, if youre Black and white queers make you feel like a joke or a sex object, etc etc
there IS better out there and you DESERVE better)
you deserve to be loved and cared for wholly, as you are! that is the bare minimum you should be afforded, and you don't owe the people who feed your self-loathing, who demand you present yourself only in parts or fractions, SHIT. fuck those people
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As we unpack the devastating effects of this election, I think an important piece of context to look at is the popular vote. The popular vote means nothing in terms of electing Presidents due to the electoral college. However, it does serve as a useful yardstick for the political temperature of campaigns relative to one another.
A thing that needs to be understood about this election is that the Trump campaign did not win the election. The Harris campaign lost the election.
Trump's numbers aren't any better than they were in 2016. There was not a massive wave of right-wing sentiment that washed over the country this year and turned voters against the left.
The reason we lost is because over 10 million voters who turned out for Biden stayed home this year. The Right didn't rise; It stayed right where it was, while the Left collapsed in on itself.
So, the question we need to ask ourselves as we move forward is, what do we take away from this? It isn't about what Trump did right. Trump went out there and was Trump, and appealed to the same number of people, and didn't appeal to the same number of people, and that's all the same. Trump did Trump and took home Trump numbers. MAGA did as MAGA does, doing no better or worse than MAGA's ever done.
So the question we need to ask ourselves and our party is, what did we do wrong?
There's a lot of answers floating out there. Many contradictory.
Personally, it's my opinion that the Harris campaign stamping down on the "They're weird" and "They're fascists" language and instead trying to appeal to moderate Republicans wound up alienating the Left.
Trading Leftist votes for the Moderate Right is never a good move for a Democrat to make, because you'll never be conservative enough for conservatives. They already have a candidate they like. You'll never win enough conservative votes to offset the liberal votes you're losing with that approach.
It sucks, it absolutely sucks, that "Liberals have to fall in love while conservatives fall in line" but that's how it is. That's the political atmosphere, and Democrats need to operate with the understanding that the Left won't show up if they don't like their candidate. The Left's votes cannot be taken for granted. They will let the fascist win if they don't like their candidate.
Note that I don't specify any particular flavor of Left there. I don't know who didn't show up. I don't care who didn't show up. I'm not interested in the conversation, "Who do we blame for this?" That's unproductive. The conversation I want to have is, "What do we learn from this?"
And my takeaway is that if you want the Left to get in gear and show up to vote, you can't be saying things like "I want to have a Republican in my cabinet" or going on Fox News to let them scream at you and palling around with Liz Cheney.
I think we can safely put to bed the idea that policy matters in an election. It's an optics game. Low-info voters decide their candidate based on vibes, and not on anything substantive. The issues don't actually matter. Again, that sucks, but that is the political atmosphere today, and we won't win if we don't know how to play the game.
With that in mind, the President needs to be the President of all Americans. But the Democratic candidate needs to look like the candidate of the Left. Or else the Left won't vote.
But that's just my assessment. Maybe I'm way off-base. Bernie Sanders has always run populist campaigns around being the candidate of the Left, and he's never even won a presidential primary. That approach has always failed to sufficiently court the Left's votes, which doesn't scream "winning strategy" once the Center and Right get to add their voices to the mix.
So. IDK. I don't know where we go from here.
I just want us all to be having the right conversations.
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I have to talk about Misha I’ve been holding this for so long. I am not defending him, everything he’s done is fucked up. I just want people to understand him better and idk how coherent this will be but HSVDVXHSBSJJDF
Bc if you hate him, totally justified. But I don’t want Misha to ever be simplified to the jealous crazy younger brother. Yes he is technically that but one thing about mochijun characters is that most of the time, you can always dig further into their psyche. And I feel like not enough people do that with Misha. I haven’t made an in-depth Misha discussion until now mostly bc I’m a potato. He isn’t 2-dimensional and he fits perfectly in the themes of vnc. Misha cannot be saved, he is a hopeless character, he bears Luna’s Mark while using the Book he is doomed. You can say he was doomed the second he entered the story. His brotherly love for Vanitas is twisted. He is the embodiment of tragic. Everything that led him to this point was not his fault. The only thing he chose was to follow Luna and join their clan bc he would’ve died otherwise. Luna and Vanitas are the only good things he ever had.
We all know his backstory. So of course losing both would make him snap. And on top of all this he’s being manipulated by Teacher. Who fucking knows the lies or orders Teacher has been feeding him. All this when he’s like 12....13 at most.
And let’s approach the vanoé situation. We know the depth of vanoé’s relationship and even though Misha might’ve observed from afar, he doesn’t have that context. To be fair he probably wouldn’t care but point is, he sees Noé as some random guy. And again, let’s withdraw ourselves a bit and see things from the outside. How much time has passed since chapter 1? How long has Vanitas and Noé actually known each other? We know that a couple weeks passed since the end of the Gevaudan arc. We know that a week passed after Vanoé got kicked outta Ruthven’s study. If there are any other mini time skips I’m forgetting pls lemme know. But let’s be honest, they’ve known each other for two months. If we wanna push it, three. Of course how long you know a person doesn’t solely decide how close you get to them. You can know someone for two weeks but depending wtf goes on in that time frame, they can become your ride or die. But let’s use Misha’s logic for a minute.
You’ve known Vanitas longer, both of you went through hell under Dr. Moreau. You have the same Mark, you’re gonna suffer the same fate. And from how you see it, he chose a man he met by chance a few months ago, over you. Someone who will never truly get it. He is putting his life in the hands of a stranger over yours. You finally meet again after all this time, and the brother who you believed puts you above everything, points a gun at you. Yeah, Misha fucked up. But that will hurt anybody.
Misha challenges their relationship. He questions how much it even makes sense. It’s not only “how can you chose Noé over me?” But also “How can you kill Father but not him?” Is he more important than us?? And that’s a valid question. Messed up but understandable to ask. Noé has protected Vanitas and has been pretty helpful. But Vanitas doesn’t need him to survive. Noé isn’t essential for this suicide mission he’s on either. Misha cannot understand what Noé brings to Vanitas’ life.
Misha was so dependent on Vanitas that he couldn’t fathom his brother not feeling the same. Vanitas loves Misha, no matter how strained or corrupted that bond has become. But he is not emotionally capable to stay with him. And he is allowed to feel that way. And Misha is allowed to scream and wail and be broken about it. In conclusion, Misha is an amazing addition to the narrative, I love him a lot. But I also love Vincent from ph so that explains quite a bit doesn’t it?
#anime#les memoires de vanitas#the case study of vanitas#manga#vanitas no carte#vnc manga#jun mochizuki#vnc#noe archiviste#vanitas#vanoé#mikhail#misha#tumblr#anime tumblr#tragedy#analysis#I feel bad for him man#hope he reconciles with Vanitas before they meet their end#hope Domi is involved too#luna vnc
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