#but also the past two weeks have been HELL
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Adam and Lucifer have been a sort of friends with benefits, thing, for a few months now. It had been a while since he’d come back as a sinner.
They were both trying to play it casual. Sneaking around cause it’s supposed to be casual and Lucifer didn’t want Charlie thinking it was a thing and getting excited only to be disappointed before (when) they stopped, cause it was casual so obviously they weren’t going to be forever.
Even though Lucifer was caught giving Adam a t-shirt as a gift, and they both lied and said it was Adam’s birthday. Even though he doesn’t have one.
They hung out on not dates. It wasn’t a big deal.
And when they have sleep overs, Lucifer just portals one of them back to their own room in the morning. Nice and easy
But that morning Adam looked rather cute asleep, and Lucifer figured he could just go down and maybe get some breakfast and bring it back up for Adam and him. Have a little breakfast in bed.
He grabbed his shirt and pyjama bottoms off the ground.
They’d stayed up late the night before. They fucked yeah, but also the season finally of their tv show was a two parter and so they had curled up in bed to cuddle as they watched it. He was a little groggy.
Lucifer wandered down to the kitchen yawning.
“Mornin’” Lucifer muttered as chipper as he could be given how tired he was.
“Uhh, morning, dad.” Charlie smiled but it was a little tight around the edges.
His own smile wavered as he wondered if everything was okay.
Lucifer got down a coffee mug and poured a cup. He’d need the caffeine. They had a not date that night.
The opera house was showcasing a collection of Tchaikovsky’s best work and Adam was excited to go. Heaven’s version of the music had gotten a little boring after a while, according to Adam, but the one in hell was a little more theatrical and in Adam’s words, “fucked a lot harder”.
Adam had had ways around the parental locks up in heaven meant to keep things more pg. It made his band rather popular for more than just having him in it. But he was enjoying that he could just see shows and things without needing to skirt rules that dumbed things down or made it nicer for souls.
Lucifer pulled down a second cup.
It was good that they did have some music tastes in common. Rock wasn’t strictly Lucifer’s genre of choice but he did like some of it that Adam introduced him to. And he recognized some pieces just having heard them and not realized.
Adam got so excited about things like music.
His eyes lit up and he had so much fun. It was good to see since he’d been so miserable when he first fell.
After a while they commiserated together over shared pains. One thing had turned into another as one glass of wine turned to another. Soon they’d kissed.
Weeks later they did it again.
Then again.
Then they went to the movies where they entwined their pinkies in the dark and leaned a little against each other. Afterwards they went back to Lucifer’s room. In the morning Lucifer opened a portal to Adam’s room so no one would see them.
“Uhh, dad?”
Lucifer startled. He’d forgotten the others were there. “Hmm? Yes, sweetie?”
Charlie tapped her nails nervously against her own mug. “You, well, you poured two cups of coffee.”
Shit.
Shit. Shit!
Fuck.
“Oh. I guess I spaced out.” He gave a hollow laugh to try and mask his mistake as a different sort of mistake. “Must be a two cup day, good thing I already have two.”
Lucifer tried to leave but he bumped into Alastor as he turned, barely keeping the coffee from spilling.
“Why, good morning, your majesty.” Alastor gave a mock bow of his head.
He rolled his eyes and almost pushed past Alastor, because like hell he was going to go around the fucker. You moved for the king, not the other way around. But Alastor spoke before he could keep going.
“How sweet of you.” Alastor might be all smiles but his eyes never agreed with his mouth. “Bringing Adam coffee in bed this morning? I assume you’re in your room today.”
Lucifer nearly dropped his mugs and his jaw. “Wha-“
“After all, you two didn’t stay in his room.” Alastor moved out of Lucifer’s way but Lucifer couldn’t take a step.
He clenched the mugs and there was a slight crack as Lucifer gripped too hard.
“I do appreciate it when you stay in your room. I can’t hear your activities through the wall I share with him when you both retire to your suite for the night.”
The mug dripped hot coffee over Lucifer’s hand through the cracks.
“Oh dear.” Alastor’s tone mocked. “Was it supposed to be a secret? I assumed you two were telling people. Seeing as you’re wearing the shirt you got him for his birthday.”
Lucifer looked down at the Duckysaurus shirt he’d picked up off the floor and his face lit up like a bonfire. It hung loose on him. There was no way he could try to claim that he bought his own, but he tried to stammer through an explanation he didn’t remember the details of anyway.
“And the two coffee mugs?” Alastor pressed.
“I-“ fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
FUCK!
What had he said? What was it? He closed his eyes, pressing them together. Trying to remember.
A hand covered his. He opened his eyes and Charlie was looking at him.
“Dad. Maybe we should talk in private.” She lead his hands to the counter to put down the broken mugs.
As she hooked her arm in his and as she dragged him away he could head Vaggie ask Alastor why he did that.
“Perhaps I wasn’t clear. I can hear them through the wall!”
The trip up to Charlie’s office was quiet. She didn’t look angry, but she didn’t look happy either.
“Sit.” She let him go and he sank into one of the overstuffed chairs in her office as she leaned against her desk in front of him.
It cut too close to home and reminded him of being scolded by the other angels back in heaven, and she hadn’t even said anything yet.
“Is what Alastor says true?”
He opened his mouth and shut it again. He flushed and looked away, covering his mouth to try and hide his embarrassment.
“So yes.” Charlie sighed. “I’ll have a talk with Alastor about outing other people’s business then.”
She gripped the edge of the desk hard and he winced as her nails dug into the wood.
“Char-“
“It’s none of my business. If you wanted me to know, you would have told me.”
“It’s not-“ he started. Lucifer rubbed the back of his neck and looked down at his rubber duck themed pyjama bottoms and bare hooves. He muttered more to himself than speaking to Charlie. “It’s not serious or anything.”
“You don’t have to-“ Charlie pushed herself away from the desk and moved to the window. “It’s not like you and mom are going to get back together. I’m just... I don’t know.” She wrapped her arms around herself, she look to the ground.
Lucifer got up from his seat, “Charlie.” He didn’t want to move. Fear twisted in his heart.
What if she reject his attempt to comfort her? Rejected him?
He took a step and reached for her.
She turned and hugged him tight.
Lucifer wrapped his arms around her. Burying his face in her shoulder.
“I just didn’t want to get you excited for something that wasn’t going to work out.” He pulled her closer as his face started to burn and his eyes started to water. “He’ll leave one day. And it’s better not to get attached.”
She squeezed back just as hard. “Oh Dad.” Charlie said sadly as she pulled back to look him in the eyes. “You love him, don’t you?”
“What?” He laughed. Lucifer wiped away an errant tear as his slide down his face. “No. That would be-“ He took her hands in his and looked away. “Stupid. Really stupid of me.”
Charlie pulled him back into a hug and squeezed him until he thought he was going to pop.
Lucifer hugged her back.
“Love is never stupid.” She said into his ear. “Come on. Tell me about Adam.”
He laughed but those stupid tears were back. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Anything.” She pulled him to the window seat and they cuddled. “I just want you to let me in a bit.”
Charlie rested her head on his. “You live here now, but you’re still a million miles away. You’re here.” She squeezed him, “but you’re not here.”
“I’m sorry.”
When did his little girl get so big? So observant?
“I don’t mean to be.”
“I know, dad.”
The lapsed into silence for a bit. Just enjoying each other’s company before Lucifer spoke.
“He’s nice.” What could he say? “He’s brash. And swears like a sailor in a storm. But he’s fun. And Adam can be thoughtful too. He doesn’t care if anyone knew about us, it was just me. He snuck around for me.”
They talked and Lucifer kept finding more things to say about Adam. Things that annoyed him and made Charlie laugh. “Vaggie does the exact same thing. Seeing them together. It’s funny, it’s like he’s her dad.”
“That stumpy walk when they’re mad!”
“Oh and how they both go, ‘babe’.” Charlie giggled.
Lucifer snorted a laughed. “Ohhh! The drill sergeant voice.”
“Listen up maggots!” Charlie tried to impersonate Vaggie.
“Yeah!” Lucifer was having a fit of laughter. “That’s totally them. I took Adam to a concert and some fucker tried to mug us. Adam had him doing push-ups. “Fifty more, maggot!” It was so hot.” He flushed realizing he just called Adam hot in front of Charlie.
She breezes past it though. “So you guys go on dates?”
“Not dates. But we hang out. Alone.” He put his on his knees and kept wiggling his hooves together. “Like going to the movies. Concerts. We get dinner.”
“Those sound like dates.”
Maybe they were.
“He’s not staying. Adam’s trying to get back to heaven. We can’t be together.”
“But you want him to stay.”
Lucifer nodded.
Charlie’s fingers brushed through his bed head. He could feel her twisting small strands together and braiding little pieces of his hair. Lucifer let her play with his hair in the silence.
“Have you asked him to?”
“He hasn’t.” Adam spoke up from the doorway.
Lucifer jolted as he was startled.
Adam was shirtless and just in the sweat pants he wore as pyjamas. His chest was hairy and his stomach chubby, it was hard not to just sink into the harsh man’s soft body.
“Adam-“ Lucifer went to get up but Adam gestured for him to stay and Adam came to him.
He took a seat on the other side of Lucifer. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something.”
A hand took Lucifer’s.
“I talked to heaven. Told Sera I was going to keep working on my shit, but that I wanted to stay down here.”
“You did?” He asked hesitantly.
Adam nodded. “Actually. Charlie got me in touch with a therapist and I’ve been going once a week to talk about crap that wouldn’t be fair to lay on my kind of boyfriend’s kid to help sort out. Shit about Eden and Eve. Crap about falling and shit from heaven.”
Pulling the hand to his lips, Adam kissed it. “I figured if I wanted this to work I should probably work on the shit that drove Lilith and Eve away.”
“If-“ Lucifer couldn’t take his eyes off their hands. “If I asked you to stay…”
“Are you asking?”
He bit his lip, the fear of rejection trying to harden his heart. Lucifer nodded.
“I’d love to stay.”
“Excellent to hear.” Alastor interrupted the tender moment. “Can I assume you’ll be moving into Lucifer’s room? Or better yet, his house. I’ll help you pack.”
Adam smiled even as Lucifer swore and Charlie gave a sharp, “Alastor!”
“Oh no, Al. My dear grandchild. I’d say it’s much too soon to move in together. But I think we’re likely to stay over with each other much more often.”
They both fake laughed and Alastor turned to Charlie. “I’d like to change rooms.”
-
This was supposed to be a funny bit about a neat t-shirt I saw that said duckysaurus and had a dino rubber duck on it.
#hazbin hotel adam#adamsapple#hazbin hotel lucifer#adam x lucifer#my Adamsapple fanfiction#hazbin hotel charlie#hazbin hotel alastor
50 notes
·
View notes
Text
the fellowship as roommates:
frodo: probably one of the best roommates out there. keeps to himself, tidy, does his laundry quickly and doesn’t leave it in the wash for a week. the company he keeps inviting over are weird though and you wish he’d stop obsessing over his jewelry. there’s a ring dish by the sink he’s always being funny about.
sam: he has to stop bringing plants home. the amount of dirt where there shouldn’t be is getting ridiculous. will make bread for the household though, and that makes up for it. does his dishes and all the dishes in the sink frequently and genuinely enjoys the task. took over the decoration and homemaking instantly.
merry: has a massive candle collection that would be fire safety issue. it not, however, a fire safety issue because merry never lights them. he has discontinued yankee candles and various limited edition scents. it’s his pride and joy and he doesn’t ever want to burn them because he wants to keep them forever. once pippin lit his maple-bacon soy wax triwick 1998 and merry went nuts. aside from that, pleasant company.
pippin: his parents pay for his rent because he couldn’t be bothered to pay it on time, and the tooks really, really wanted their son out of the house. do NOT go in his room. has not done laundry ever and does not plan to. keeps dirty dishes in his hamper and under his bed. keeps buying new forks thinking you won’t notice.
boromir: pays his rent a day early. handles the bills and finances and just tell you how much you owe. very respectful about your space in the fridge. does his best to be quiet past 9pm. he does, however, carve wood over the carpet and splinters have become an issue. he vacuum’s but it’s seriously becoming a problem. also keeps inviting these weirdos over who try and eat all your food.
aragorn: keeps tanning hides in the living room. is never home because he’s always at his girlfriends place. brought a dehydrator into the mix and the house always smells like meat because he’s making jerky. he will share it though, which is nice:
legolas: is mildly afraid of the bathroom. keeps clogging the drains with copious amounts of shed hair. uses your shampoo when he thinks your not looking. eats all of the good food, and small bites out of pretty much everything. tracks dirt all over the carpet and has a thing for fairy lights.
gimli: historic weaponry is NOT home decor and why the hell would you keep it over your bed. he has to have his own bathroom which he keeps very specifically (the amount of products he uses for his beard is unreasonable). generally tidy, gets weird about organizing things by color and type and would rather you let him do it.
gandalf: hardly a roommate. sometimes you wonder if he still is living with you and then he’ll show up after months of ghosting you with a random horse and a new-differently colored hat. and he will explain more about the hat than the horse. no, gandalf, we can’t keep a horse in the bathroom. our landlord will find out. please shut up about your new hat.
gollum: fresh fish keep being left on your counter on the first of each month. they’re very much someone’s goldfish that keep going missing. once, a parakeet was left in your sink. your lost socks keep reappearing on your couch. sometimes shiny rocks and coins are placed next to your phone at night. four months in there’s a scratching in your walls and this fucker pops out. he’s been living off of your scraps for nearly a year and thinks you two are best friendsies! <3 he tries to plea that he’s being paying rent. someone call the cops. (sam comes over and shoo’s him out with a broom. it’s frodos weird friend from college.)
#lord of the rings#lotr#jrr tolkien#lotr headcanons#legolas#gandalf#elves#jrrt#legolas greenleaf#samwise gamgee#frodo baggins#peregrine took#pippin took#meridoc brandybuck#merry brandybuck#gimli son of gloin#gimli#aragorn#aragorn son of arathorn#boromir#boromir son of denethor#gandalf the wizard#gandalf the grey#gandalf the white#gollum#sméagol#the fellowship#fellowship of the ring#lotr headcannon#modern au
43 notes
·
View notes
Text
Sweet Like Honeysuckles, Bloody Like Venison
So I have not written something for the past two weeks because I have been in a bad mood (tm) because of the weather changing. I admit, it's hard to stay on top of things. However, I can't stop myself from writing more cannibal king!König. I love him so much. I also like reader more and more as they accept the lifestyle of the cannibal colony. They're actually pretty sick, you know.
TWs: mentions of cannibalism, nudity
Wordcount: 3.2k
Art from This Post
Story Below the Cut
Sweet Like Honeysuckles, Bloody Like Venison
A deer passed through the clearing ahead of you. Her head was held high up to admire the sunlight filtering through the coniferous trees with a regality that betrayed her splendor. Her tan coat twitched in the cool misty dawn, the only sign that she was a creature of this forest as much as you were.
König sat beside you and looked out. His eyes wandered beyond the deer to the trees beyond, through them to the figures that stood across from you.
The five men wore basic skins, their tanned skin painted white with glowing pigments. The tallest among them was red as a newborn, his face pudgy and soft. His thick fingers curled around the club in his hand nervously.
König called out to the men calmly, spooking away the deer. If you didn’t feel his arm tighten around your shoulders, you might have thought he was warmly greeting them. As it was, whatever he said was as crisp and cool as the forest fog.
The big red man shouted back warily. He rose his club meekly, but as soon as König straightened his spine the club was lowered and tucked behind his bare body. König snuffed and stomped his foot. He let out a feral snarl and the men of the forest scrambled back into the dark undergrowth, leaping like the deer that left before.When he turned back to you, the hardened look in his eyes washed away to some incommunicable sadness.
He touched where your heart lay in your chest and whispered your name.
“König?” you asked warily, “who were those men?”
He looked back to where the men once stood and snarled at the ghosts they left behind. He shook his head, but you noticed he touched the club that hung at his side. He tapped the handle, then pointed back across the clearing. He turned back to you and shook his head ominously.
Enemies.
“Why were they here?” you asked as you followed König back through the forest.
König shrugged as he knelt beside a small trap. He raised the woven twig box to look underneath. He sighed, set it back upright and turned back to you and pointed at you and then back at his chest.
“Safe,” he grunted as he ruffled your hair.
“Are you sure?” you stepped closer to his bare chest.
He nodded before giving you a brief one-handed hug, “Safe.”
He pulled back and led you through the forests again. You followed him obediently. You knew that in any other situation, you would’ve taken König’s turned back as a chance to run and escape this madman and his wicked ways, but he was your only chance of surviving on this rock. If you were lucky you’d be rescued one day, but the odds of surviving this hell grew slimmer with each passing day. The seasons passed by so quickly that you couldn’t keep track of time. Again you thought of those soldiers that had been sent to reconnaissance the island with you. They had a better chance of survival than you did, but you still wondered if they were still fighting out there, or if they had been struck down by a different band of cannibals.
Your current band of cannibals, the one that König had kidnapped you into, were a surprisingly comfortable group to share the company of. As you lived with them, their noisy grunts and feral snuffling began to form patterns. Those patterns were slowly decoded, and you could pick out bits and pieces of words if you strained your ears. You couldn’t speak to your captors, but you were slowly starting to understand them. Of course, you’d learned from König that they understood you perfectly well. All your cursing and crying and screaming and shouting, they’d bore witness to it all. They had listened to you curse them and their ways all the way up to Heaven and then down to Hell, but they still showed you what primitive kindness they could.
The woman who’d brushed your hair before had soon become a close friend. She was the one member of the tribe (other than König, of course) who you’d really started to understand. She was a gentle soul with you. After a brief discourse with König, she’d slowly come to teaching you some of their language.
She taught you the word for hair, and then the word for flower. You learned the words for wood and axe soon after. She noticed your interest in some of her herbs, and she carefully taught you the names of each one in turn. She tried to explain which ones were used for what, but she soon lost you. Instead of disappointment, she instead gently rested a frail hand on your shoulder and gave you a thin smile. There was no irritation, only a fiery determination to keep going. You matched her fervor and strived forward.
She watched as König would drop you off with her every other day. After the claiming in front of the tribe, she’d watched you and him more carefully. She noticed things you didn’t, and she taught you in turn. She taught you what berries he liked to eat the most, which parts of the rabbit he liked roasted over the fire. She taught you, in a way, how to be a woman in this world.
Being a woman in a cannibal tribe turned out to be harder work than expected. While the men went to hunt, wage war and gather wood and stone, the women worked closer to home. They worked the small farms, they skinned and tanned the meats. Here, a woman was expected to work the land and provide for her family. However, as you soon learned from König, men were equally expected to work.
König was the chief of his band and he acted every part of it. He spoke to the women to mediate disputes and he comforted the men as their bones were set by the shaman. He hunted, he cooked, he managed trades and he protected borders. He worked with every member of his tribe and watched over them personally. He was an honorable leader in that sense. You watched as children climbed his back to try and take him down with laughter and delight. He lifted them up and, even from a distance, you could see the sheer joy in his eyes under that golden mask of his. In a way, he was a crucial part of every family. He was the father, the mother, the wife, the husband. He was the teacher, the shaman, the diplomat and the judge and, as needed, the executioner. He was with everyone through thick and through thin.
And then, he’d come home to you.
Ever since he’d claimed you in front of his kin, he’d become more intimate with you. Carefully, gently, he’d taken you into his arms and held you at night. When he tired from the strenuous days, he’d rest his head on your chest and groan as you worked the knots from his back. The great cannibal king that kidnapped you and lorded over you became naught much more than a tired dog when he came back to your arms. You watched over your king, worshiped him with oils and herbs that had been gifted to you by the one eyed crone with a wink and a wry laugh. Your king had taught you how to use them on his skin by practicing on you.
You’d been tired after working all day. You were exhausted by the long day of foraging and hunting and when you’d come back to his cabin you’d nearly collapsed at his feet. That was when he rolled you onto your stomach and taken the tinctures from their clay jars. At first, you’d been frightened when he straddled your back, but soon you realized that he was more interested in caring for you than caring for himself. He’d been gentle that night, every so gentle. He whispered soft words into your ears, and that was when you learned the words for gratitude and praise.
You thought of that night as you walked behind König through the woods. In your oblivious state you’d failed to notice when he’d taken two rabbits from the traps and slung them around his belt. You looked around you and stalled.
König turned back to look at you as soon as he felt you drop behind him. He stalked back up to you and snuffed.
“König,” you asked nervously, “where are we?”
König chuffed and took your elbow in one of his hands and lightly tugged you along.
You briefly resisted before sighing and giving in. You let him drag you along, grateful that he slowed hsi stride to accommodate for you. You felt almost like one of the children in his grasp, what with how he guided you firmly and surely through the woods.
The trees parted and you stumbled out across a rocky stream.
You looked at König as he put his belongs onto a rock and turned back to you. He nodded towards the stream and crossed his arms over his hairy chest.
You looked at the stream and back at him, bewildered by his insinuations.
“You want me to take a bath?” you asked.
König nodded firmly.
You looked at the clear water running across the smooth river stones. Some lush green weeds waved through the current with a shoal of fish fry. You stepped closer to the bubbling water, peering down into the depths. The water was so clear that you could see all the way to the bottom. Each pebble shone like a gem against the muddy bottom.
You turned back to König to say something and immediately turned back. You hadn’t seen much, but of what you did see it was enough to make you blush furiously. You felt hands trail under the hems of your shirt and skirted away with a squeak.
“König!” you scolded him furiously, determined to keep your eyes above his shoulders.
König grunted and nodded again at the river. This time, the message was too blatant to pretend to ignore.
You shivered as you pulled your shirt up above your head, followed quickly by your tactical pants and then your underwear. It was mostly ruined by now, but without it you felt more vulnerable than ever before. You shivered in the cold and looked down at the river. You turned back at König and looked at the golden mask on his face. You scoffed.
“So I have to take everything off and you can keep your mask?” you snarked.
König paused, then nodded begrudgingly. Your eyes widened as he walked back over to where he hung his loincloth and grabbed at the black hood. Your lips parted as his big hands gripped the fabric in a punishing grip. A part of you felt like you should look away. As König had bared you to the world, so too did you bare him. He brought the fabric up slowly, then pulled his head free and out from the wretched thing.
His head was nearly bald, just like all the other cannibals. However, unlike the others, you could see the big mars of scars over his neck and up the back of his head. They crossed over his left ear, making it naught much more than a stub of fleshy scar tissue. If you hadn’t seen him in action, you’d have thought he might be deaf out of the one ear.
He turned slowly, almost as though he was afraid of what you’d think. Maybe he was right to be afraid. You shivered and sniffed in the cold, then took him in for the first time fully.
Were you to meet this man in any other circumstance, his face could really only be described at best as possibly above average. He had a light dusting of blond stubble over his round chin. His aurochs neck was thick with ropes of muscle, a stark contrast to his soft lips and crooked roman nose. His eyes, fully bared to the world now, were soft and sad. He looked less like a powerful chief and more like a timid man, forced to bear a title he never wanted. He looked vulnerable, afraid, human. He was no longer the conquering cannibal king; he was a man underneath all his dressings and scars.
You stepped forth carefully, stumbling a bit over the stones before catching yourself. You could see König’s small mouth quirk up to the side. You huffed, but continued up to him.
In front of him you had to crane your head back to admire his visage. You reached up to touch him and he leant his face down to be embraced. He curled himself like an inchworm, bending himself in half to be able to take your small affections. He closed his innocent eyes and you mapped your fingers across his marred skin. Burn marks, hatchet cuts, spear wounds, they all pockmarked his skin. You traced a white line across the side of his neck. How he survived such a wound was a miracle. He opened his eyes at that, life sparking behind them with an electric intensity. You traced your thumbs across his lips reverently. He let you, but when you leaned in to kiss him he pushed you back softly.
You stumbled as you were pushed. You looked up to him, aghast. You felt mortified. Had he really just rejected your advances? He’d kidnapped you, he’d taken you into his cabin and massaged your body, he’d mounted you in front of his entire tribe, and he rejected you? You could hardly wrap your head around it.
König pointed to the water and grunted. You followed his hand, then turned back to him. He smirked as he tapped his lips, then pointed back at the water.
So that’s how it would be.
You sulked over to the river bank and peered into the water. The water was deceptively deep. You’d only make it a couple of strides in before it sloped down.
You squeaked when you put a pinky toe in. It was cold, terribly cold. You already hated it. This felt absolutely awful. You already wanted to go and put your clothes on and sulk underneath a tree. You turned to shoot König a bitter scowl before finally letting yourself step into the water.
It was terribly cold, but it was bearable. You knew how this worked, as long as you kept going the water would eventually get warmer. You stepped further and further into the water before you got to the edge of the slope. With a deep breath, you fell into the water.
Ice cold water encompassed you entirely. You pushed to the center of the riverbed and came up for air. The water wasn’t cold enough to get frostbite, but you damn well felt like you would. You cursed and spluttered to yourself, not taking notice of König dipping into the water behind you.
König chuckled as he stood beside you. He dunked his head under the water briefly and rubbed at his scalp before coming back up for air. He looked at your shivering form and rolled his eyes. You huffed, but followed his lead to wash the water through your hair.
Weeks of grease floated away down the stream. Despite the cold, you felt like you were shedding layers of grime into the current. You’d never felt so fresh before. The water was still unpleasant, but if nothing else you were getting accustomed to it.
König focussed on cleaning his body, something you never knew you’d take so much interest in. You watched him lave water over his face and back, cleaning away dirt marks that had built up. You realized that König must have been coming out here often since you’d been brought back to his cabin. In fact, you must have been downright filthy compared to him. How he’d been able to tolerate hugging you close every night, you’d never know. If nothing else, it was another tally for him being a rather benevolent kidnapper at least. At the very least.
König turned back to you and stepped closer. He gently moved in closer, closer and closer still until he had his front pressed up against yours. Were he not a beacon of warmth you might have pushed him away, but as it was he was the only thing standing between you and freezing to death out there. Or, well, you figured you might, but if König had been coming here for so long, it mustn’t be quite as bad as you made it out to be. Maybe you were just too accustomed to the steaming hot showers you had back home.
König sighed as he let himself bend over you. You, for your part, took your arms out and embraced him, rubbing his back and humming under your breath as you took in his company. He was more than happy to let you rub concentric circles along his spine.
König grumbled something and begrudgingly stepped back. You lamented the warmth before you realized what he’d pulled back to do and turned away to give him some semblance of privacy. You turned your focus onto yourself and focussed on scrubbing away the dirt from your body. Once you finished, you peaked around yourself to look at König and check if he was finished with cleaning himself yet.
To your relief, he was already striding to shore. He tossed you a glance over his shoulder expectantly. When you followed him out, he pulled a couple of woven mats from his bag and offered one to you. You were quick to take it, but when you went to get your clothes back König was quick to hold you back. Instead, he offered you a pair of simple robes. They were slightly too big, they smelled of leather and animal, but the fur was terribly soft and warm on your body. You were shocked to realize that it was a full-length robe, much like that of some of the other cannibal women. What amazed you was the amount of neatly woven embroidery along the hems of the garment. It was simple rope made of basic materials, but it had been dyed vibrant colours and woven in intrinsic patterns. You looked back at König, who was still standing bare in front of you, the makeshift towel slung around the back of his neck.
You focussed on his face, upon which a contented smile sat. He gave you an affirming nod and took one hand to ruffle your damp hair before leaning down to press a kiss to your forehead. You looked up at him briefly.
You stared at each other for a moment. He bent down slowly and let his hand fall from the top of your head to your cheek, stroking it lightly with his thumb. He leaned in close ever so slowly and you responded in turn.
Your lips met, and you almost immediately pulled back. The shock wore off quickly, and you leaned back in again for another. His lips were rough and chapped, his breath was poor, and yet it couldn’t have been sweeter. It reminded you of honeysuckle nectar and blueberries growing among the forest floor. When König pulled back, his smile was bright and innocent, boyish even. You were shocked by a thought that passed through your mind; he was the most handsome man you’d ever seen.
Konig Dump
Alternate Universes
#konig#cod konig#konig cod#konig call of duty#konig mw2#konig x reader#konig x you#konig fluff#konig fanart#fan art#digital art#cod mw2#cod#cod mwii#cod x reader#call of duty#modern warfare#konig fanfiction#konig headcanons#cod headcanons#konig hcs#konig fanfic#konig childhood#konig relationship#konig shenanigans#konig art#konig au#cannibal king!konig#cannibal!konig#cannibalism
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
Black Dahlia - 18. I'm Trying (Garrick)
Summary: A certain someone's opinion has started to change, but despite his efforts nothing has changed. And one night someones friendship has him seeing red. A/N: Little bit of a filler chapter, but couldn't resist these three having a moment like this. Probably the first of many. Also next week we might get a certain someone's signet reveal.....
Garrick Tavis x OC (Dahlia Aetos)
Black Dahlia Masterlist | Masterlist
The last few weeks had been driving me crazy. Ever since Threshing I couldn’t get her off my damn mind. She plagued my thoughts constantly, and suddenly I was aware of her anytime I was in the same room as her. Aware of every glare she sent my way. How she would constantly ignore my presence whenever I was around. I’d even tried to be nice to her on a few occasions after Xaden had suggested it and she’d thrown it back in my face, shutting me down instantly. Great idea that was.
Her laughter carries down to me from where I sit with Xaden. A sound I’d only heard come from her recently. Before now I’d only seen her smirk or smile a little bit here and there. But in the last few weeks Bodhi had managed to coax a laugh out of her. The sound even startling Dain who had been nearby when it happened. I’d often caught him starting at his sister as if he didn’t believe what he was seeing. As if he’d never seen her act this way, or as if he was reliving a past memory. Something that had definitely made me curious about the two of them. And also proving further I had probably jumped to my conclusion on her a little too soon.
”Geez, you look like you’re about to murder someone.” Bodhi teases as he slots into the empty space beside Xaden.
I don’t even spare him a glance as I stand and storm off towards the exit. Scraping and rushed foot steps follow me, and I don’t have to turn around to know they’ve both followed me. As the cold air of the fast approaching winter hits I can’t help but relax a little. The coolness relieving some of the pent up anger I’d been bottling up over the last few weeks.
”What the hell is up your ass?” Xaden asks bluntly as he falls into step next to me.
”Nothing. Just had a long day.” I tell him, heading over to the edge of the Rotunda to look out over the edge.
Being it was pretty much winter, the sun had long set behind the mountains, a pink glow on the horizon signalling it would soon be completely dark outside.
“More like a long few weeks.” Bodhi adds as he leans up against pillar next to me. “You know you can talk to us.”
Bodhi didn’t deserve my anger. He did nothing wrong. Hell he had done better than I had. Even Xaden which had surprised me. They both told me I’d come to eat my words. And I had. And here I was getting jealous over Bodhi being friends with her while she wouldn’t give me time of day.
“Do I get to tell you I told you so?” Chradh drawls in my head, a teasing tone to his voice.
“Don’t you start.” I snap back, earning me a chuckle from him.
“Oh I’m just getting started.” He mocks before I slam my shields firmly into place.
With a sigh I push up from the ledge and face my two friends. “Trust me, it’s nothing you two need to worry about.”
Xaden eyes me, and I can tell he knows exactly what’s up as his eyes flick to Bodhi. He was too damn perceptive for his own good.
“It’s about her isn’t it?” He asks, a slight hint of teasing in his voice. Great, just fucking great.
“I told you it was nothing.” I almost snap at him.
“So she’s nothing is she?” A slight smirk pulling at Xadens lips as he eyes me.
“Yes. Always has been and always will be. She’s nothing to me.”
“Right, so that’s why every time you see Bodhi with her you look like you want to murder him?”
“I do not!” I nearly yell at him, causing a few people heading to dinner to look our way as Bodhi and Xaden chuckle at me.
”Oh you do.” Bodhi teases with a smirk as I glare at him. If he wasn’t practically family I would probably punch that smirk off his god damn face.
“No. I. Don’t.” I grumble out as I clench my fists.
“Yes, you have been. Ever since that training session we did where she chose Bodhi over you, you’ve been practically death staring him.” Xaden says, almost looking proud he gets to announce it. I open my mouth to respond but he cuts me off. “And don’t try deny it. Ever since Threshing you’ve been different towards her.”
“I have not. I hate her. She’s nothing to me.” I admit, but the words felt wrong leaving my mouth. A blatant lie. “Name one situation where I’ve been different towards her.” I challenge the two of them, both sharing a look that makes me nervous.
“Where to begin. How about the morning after Threshing where I walked into the hallway to you practically eye fucking her.” Bodhi starting off the list.
Shit, I’d forgotten about that. But I wasn’t eye fucking her. Simply getting under her skin. I didn’t want her that way.
“Or after Threshing where I had to grab you to stop you from going after her father when he grabbed her.” Xaden adds with a grin.
Shit.
“Oh and at training where steam was practically coming out your ears when she pulled Bodhi off the ground and he held onto her hand a little too long for your liking. Do we need to go on?”
Bodhi’s eyes light up. “And I’m pretty sure you’ve teased her less. Barely heard you call her little Aetos since that training session.”
“That doesn’t mean anything. Maybe I’ve just come to realise she’s not as bad as I thought. And maybe she’s not like her brother or father.” I admit as casually as I can, trying to cut off the conversation.
“So we get to say I told you so?” Xaden teases with a smirk.
I roll my eyes and shake my head. “Hell no. I said she might not be that bad. I don’t even know her and she won’t give me the time of day.”
“Can you blame her? You’ve kinda been an ass towards her.” Bodhi admits, looking nervous how I’ll respond.
I snap my heads towards him as I glare at him. “I’m trying ok! Well tried. She seems pretty adamant I’m nothing to her, so probably no point in trying anymore.” I say with a shrug.
If she wanted to keep this up, I was more than happy to do the same.
Bodhi sighs and shakes his head at me. “Give her time Garrick. She’s clearly had a rough life. Hell she barely tells me anything outside of her day to day life and she considers me a friend, and even that took months.”
“She’s an Aetos, I doubt her life has been that rough.” I say bitterly.
Yes there was something off about her family dynamic, but her life can’t have been that bad. But maybe I was even wrong about that. She was different to her brother. Held her self differently. Acted differently. Besides the few heated conversations I’d seen them have, he was definitely the more approachable of the two. He talked easily with other cadets, made friends easily. But something told me if it wasn’t for Bodhi pushing the limit with her, she would have been on her own. Outside of him and the other two girls I’d seen with them, she didn’t hang out with anyone else. And when she wasn’t with them, the hard mask came back down in full force. Almost as if that was her normal way of acting. As if the way she had started being around Bodhi and the others wasn’t normal for her.
“I can tell you know that’s not true. All you have to do is look at how Dain and Dahlia act around each other to know that’s not true.” Bodhi smiling softly at the end, as if he’s trying to make me feel sorry for her. Which honestly, maybe I did a little.
“Whatever. I tried and she doesn’t want a bar of it. So it doesn’t matter.” I say before stalking off to my dorm to try get some sleep before our supply run. But with the thoughts running through my head, I highly doubted sleep would come to me.
@imtoanonymousforyou @simplyme-fornow @omalmal @lalaluch @wolfbc97 @leptitlu @fullmoon-94 @the-fandom-ness @fan-of-many-bands @awkardnerd @heeseungthel0ml
#fourth wing#fourth wing fanfic#garrick tavis#the fourth wing#garrick tavis x reader#garrick tavis imagine#garrick tavis x oc#fourth wing imagine#fourth wing x reader#bodhi durran#xaden riorson#dain aetos
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
It'd been a long time since he'd been in a crowd like this. Hell, it'd been a long time since he'd been in a crowd at all. Charlie avoided anywhere that might be even a little too busy like the plague-- he tried to do all his own grocery shopping without relying too much on a delivery service, but that also meant all his trips were made past 8pm to avoid the busiest hours. He didn't go out much, didn't make many plans, and when he did, he drove himself. Catch a ride and there was too much of a chance he couldn't get out when he wanted to.
The show had been sold out by the time he'd thought to grab a ticket, so he'd ended up with a vastly overpriced seat just far enough away from the stage that he thought Vi probably wouldn't be able to make out his face. He wasn't sure if he'd want him to. Though maybe his dress would give him away-- he kept his hoodie up and fucked his bead whenever someone glanced his way, making him feel far more out of place than if he'd walked in stark naked. He might as well have. There were plenty of outfits around him mimicking the various costumes Vi went through during his show, or cropped versions of his tour tees, all covered in glitter and bright colors. He probably stood out like a sore thumb and he found it hard to breathe whenever he thought too hard about where he was. Stuck in a sea of people, and if anyone happened to recognize him...
Luckily, though, Vi was still damn good at what he did. Charlie could breathe a little easier once the show had started and he could focus on the man on stage, fully in his element as he teased the crowd and showed off the full range of his voice. It was difficult not to get caught up in it. Every light and every outfit did everything they possibly could to emphasize the beauty of the man up on stage, and Charlie found it enchanting-- how much he was still the very same as the man who'd visited him a few weeks back. He was no less genuine in front of a few thousand people than he'd been playing with Charlie's dog in his living room.
The heat and claustrophobia of the crowd still managed to worm its way back to him. Charlie tugged at his hood, ready to slip away for the night, when he glanced up to see Vi moving across the stage to his piano. He hesitated for just another few moments to listen to him talk about some crush he'd formed. The same he'd mentioned in that interview he'd done, Charlie had figured. He'd been flustered to realize that Vi had spoken about him, then had found something complicated squeezing at his heart when he'd read about that crush. He wondered who it was that could possibly catch his attention.
Weaving his way through the crowd, Charlie slipped outside. He found time to breathe in the cold air out in front of the venue, looking out at the banners at the edge of the parking lot that advertised Vi's performance tonight. He'd performed here before, too. It'd been a little bit of a homecoming for the band, their last stop on their debut tour. Pushing out a long breath, he glanced down at the time on his phone. It'd already been about two hours. He figured the show would be over relatively soon. He chewed down at his lip and glanced around the side of the building. He knew Vi made appearances after his shows, sometimes. He wondered if he should stick around.
Victory checked his phone again, opening the messaging app and confirming for the hundredth time this was the right spot. He'd pulled off some kind of miracle in the last month, not only getting in contact with one of his favorite artists, but managing to keep it going almost regularly. And now he was standing outside of an unfamiliar building on an unfamiliar street in the middle of Appalachian nowhere, getting ready to meet him in person.
He'd dressed down for the occasion, mostly for his own sake, but for Charlie's too. His own success was leading to more and more people clocking him while he was out, and he doubted dressing like Elton John would help him blend in in a place like this. The bleached hair he'd been sporting recently was tucked nicely under a baseball cap, his extensive ink work covered by a baggy sweatshirt. He'd even taken his earrings out in a rush, storing them in his pocket when he realized he'd forgotten to leave them in his hotel room. The last thing Charlie needed was to be bombarded because he agreed to meet him.
In the middle of using his phone screen as a mirror, his eyes widened as it lit up with a text. Vi quickly shoved it in his pocket and gave a quick sweep of the area. He frowned for a moment, but before he could pull out his phone again, his eyes landed on a familiar face, his own quickly brightening into a grin. Bouncing on his feet, he laughed as he waved his arms to usher his pen pal over.
Charlie Reimes. Cane Corso had been a staple on his playlists for years, and here was the frontman in the flesh. -- All because he'd gotten drunk and too bold, sending him what was an embarrassing DM expressing his admiration. It was a testament to maybe not all of his questionable choices led to questionable outcomes.
Beaming, he practically hopped the rest of the way over to him, his smile toothy, cheeks pink, and his eyes crinkled. "I can't believe it! I don't think you understand how massive this is to me." He said, babbling a little in his excitement. "I can't even begin to thank you. You've been such an inspiration to me forever and-" Oh! Oh, shit. Face flooding with color, he lifted his hands to wave off the starstruck gibberish, and instead offered him his palm. "I-I'm Vi." He managed, "It's nice to see you in person."
@purposefully-lost
29 notes
·
View notes
Text
I cannot put into words how fucking frustrated I am right now
but like, the feeling of - I was doing a lot better. Since getting the cane, I made significant improvement. It was incredible. I had never felt so energetic in my entire fucking memory
And it's all gone in the past few weeks
I have no fucking clue why. I'm still using the cane and doing all the other things that seemed to help before.
I have a commitment from my doctor for a referral and some vague amount of belief, but I'm not banking on anything from her because she's still very caught up in Medicating Anxiety Away and that was ok before because I was doing ok enough to be willing to be patient and focus on building a proper relationship with her, but now I'm not even sure how I'll make it to the next appointment (which, I will, I'm always fucking fine)
And on one end, this should be affirming, some kind of proof that I'm not making it all up, that Something Is Definitely Wrong and I Need Help
But instead, I'm just beating myself up for feeling miserable when other people have it worse and obviously I shouldn't complain or ask for help because Real Disabled People need it more (hello brain, can we recognize I'm a real disabled person, please and thank you?)
And, probably just coincidence, I'm watching a lot of people in my circle get Diagnoses right now. Or falling into groups of people who already have Diagnoses and there is some very vile poisonous jealousy that deeply hates that other people get that and I'm just stuck here feeling miserable, but technically fine (because you know, I can do all the things even when I fucking can't)
And I just want someone other than me to go "oh wow, you're struggling let me help" without me having to prompt them and then to be able to let them help.
And now I know it's possible to feel better than this, I fucking want it.
But I also don't, because that would prove that I'm not disabled and I made this all up for attention.
I don't know and I hate it.
And like, I love dance, and I really really really believe in movement in dance. But it's really hard to have some kind of chronic pain and be in a movement-based field sometime. Like, all of the toxic bullshit that exists there just hits a little sharper sometimes.
And then I put the pressure on myself to be better than that, but I can't because it's literally my conditioning (and there's only so much I can do against that at a time, and trust me, between therapy and coaching and all sorts of shit, I'm doing a lot of work in it)
I'm just so tired of things being hard and now I've seen the possibility of something easier, I really want it
Maybe it's selfish, maybe it's not for me, but my god, I'm tired and i want a semi-decent relationship with my body and this is exhausting.
#meh#grumble#this all coming up from it being workout time#i love working out#apparently I can't today#no idea why#could just be the autism love of routines and I've had to change the day because of student schedules#but also the past two weeks have been HELL#and I thought I was doing better today#but maybe not enough to work out#which is so fucking annoying because I KNOW it will make me feel better#exercise is so obnoxiously complicated#also all sorts of weird food shit is a possibility#and trust me I have tried to figure out so fucking hard what is going on with my digestive system#and gave up because it was exhausting#so fuck if I know#ugh
0 notes
Text
Okay yeah I wasn't ever gonna be contained with just one post so, Callowmoore stuff that's on rotisserie in my brain from ep.94
Long and deep looks at each other and a hug right off the bat!
When asked by Laudna if they were okay in ep. 91, Ashton deflected with 'say that again?' and 'are any of us?', but when Fearne asks they give a genuine answer and then also ask her how she's feeling, because she's been quiet and they care
Ashton, despite hurting when they're touched and exhausted so the chronic pain is as intense as the first time, still wanting to cuddle with Fearne - and feeling at ease when they do
And like, the way they were trying to articulate it implies that they've wanted to ask for quite some time, but the timing has been off or situations have gotten in the way, and they don't want to wait any longer
But also they don't ask if they can cuddle they ask if Fearne wants to; they want to, but they ask Fearne if she doesn't want to sleep alone, because her comfort is as important or more important than their own
Fearne given her past experiences with people of course thinks they mean the other kind of company, which she notes she does want (so that's not off the table) but asks if they could just cuddle - to which Ashton doesn't entirely deny either, but notes that they're tired and in a lot of pain right now so they too was asking for the same
Also the fact that Fearne, who has been in a threesome inside a corrupted haunted wood, will later flirt with a dark echo of herself, and spooned with a ghost pirate captain, got so flustered about asking Ashton that she just wants to cuddle
Despite the awkwardness they still just laugh and joke together through it, they're awkward but it's in a sweet way
All of Ashton's immediate action the second they realised Fearne was missing - similar to how they wanted to find her after the shard incident but this time in a position where they could take action - no nonsense, no pissing contest with Chetney about her scent being on their bed, "Find. Them. Now."
And then still being soft after seeing Fearne again, because all that matters right now is that she's still here. And another post I saw said it better but, Ashton never seeks to change or 'correct' parts of who Fearne is; she can still follow cute animals just next time bring a buddy along (which given how they were in bed together would imply meaning them), they love her for her, fae and all, they just want her to be safe
Not entirely ep. 94 but given how on 91 Ashton pointed out that they needed to sleep and 'figure out who they wanted to be', and then here ask Fearne to be there beside them so they could have someone to wake up to, it to me at least says a lot about what Ashton has already decided; and how despite both of them having dealt with grief and anger and helplessness by bottling it up, hiding away, and shouldering it alone, this time they both wanted to just feel at ease with each other
#callowmoore#ashton greymoore#fearne calloway#fearne x ashton#ashton x fearne#ashley johnson#taliesin jaffe#critical role#cr3#cr3 spoilers#c3e94#cr spoilers#bells hells#did I mention that I'm not normal about them because AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#shipper rotisserie brain go brrrrr#Orym's passive perception 'damnnn' was great too#I have been praying for 5 weeks for just a tiny bit of comfort between the two and I got a whole buffet!#I mean I trust Matt and narratively it was juicy but c'mon man you couldn't give them one night? The night of FCG blowing up??#I wonder: if Ashton was the big spoon would they have woke up with Fearne to join the walk/fight?#I ofc wish they returned to the same bed but she was extra exhausted - next time hopefully#Zathuda still needs to die - painfully - maybe they can do it together; steal his dragon and fancy cloak#Ludinus too - live show's a big stage (half expect Sam to debut his new player then) big post-fight kiss at Aeor maybe/please?#hopefully we can also see them pickpocketing each other again because it's their love language#but so is the softness and comfort and awkward giggling and innuendo#which is why I hate that most villains tend to look past/through Ashton - they don't see them but Fearne sees them; they see each other#tag reader bonus - Ashton always sleeps on Fearne's right: so she can see/poke their glass slab but also so their stone arm doesn't cut her
100 notes
·
View notes
Text
God. What if Pandora didn’t want to open the box. What if she was manipulated, her hands tied to and guided by strings she couldn’t shake off. What if when she released the horrors out into the world, Hope chose to stay with her, in the box. What if Pandora couldn’t rid herself of that guilt. What if Hope couldn’t convince her that not all was lost, and that she wasn’t responsible for the strings around her hands. That she wasn’t a monster.
What if Pandora and Hope found a way to trap everything in the box again. What if Pandora couldn’t do it. What if she didn’t want anyone else to feel the guilt she did. What if she thought that trapping the horrors in the box would just doom everyone into the same cycle. What if she felt she had to break it by bearing the suffering of everyone else. What if Hope tried to convince her that it could be better. What if she wouldn’t save herself. What if Hope had to kill Pandora for a chance to save everyone, including her. What if they both were sealed in the box. What if no one ever knew what happened to them. What if their last words to the world and to each other were “I love you.”
What if the world ending was never Pandora’s fault, but in her guilt and grief she blamed herself for it, and the Hope that voluntarily stayed by her side had to take her life to save it.
What if?
#ive been sorta rotating this around my brain the past week or so.#yeah.#anyways.#i will NEVER be over this#i just. once saw someone refer to martin as the ‘humanity that they’re saving and will save them’ or something along those lines#and well. hope and humanity are kinda the same thing arent they?#hell i think in some versions of the myth hope is actually referred to as humanity#and this just started rattling around my head#but i can’t quite get the words right#im going to post it anyway. because better to have written down something than nothing at all.#but i can’t quite get the words right.#it has however also made me realize that jumanji is also pandoras box#which is kinda funny#the magnus archives#mag 200#pandoras box#jonathan sims#martin blackwood#i guess now that ive processed it for a week or so. its time to listen to the post-season content and start the magnus protocol.#actually it may have been two weeks. i don’t remember when exactly i finished it.#anyway.#its late i need sleep.#tma#the magnus archives spoilers#tma spoilers#tma s5 spoilers#tma finale spoilers#how to tag this so that anyone listening for the first time does not see………
69 notes
·
View notes
Text
also while we're here i would like to share the two iterations of tumblr user gorespawn that have existed since i abandoned this blog back in like early 2021. Who wants me
#i grew my hair out so i could twirl my hair while giggling about bald men#and also t.o.p of bigbang#and short men i see at the grocery store who honestly make me feel light-headed with raw and unbridled Want#but that's just a joke. i am. Lesbian#''no ur not'' I AM#anyway i used to be so ripped and hunky but now i am frail and sickly#what getting a job can do to a mf#thankfully i quit my job last week YIPPIIIEEEEEEE so now i will work towards becoming an absolute hunk again#wish me luck#ALSO#if anyone is obsessed with me and remembers all my lore i used to be transgender and i still am like lowkey on the down low#but in a new exciting way#anyway i used to be a gay man and then a stone butch dyke (as seen above) but now im practicing being a girl#it is very difficult but it is also fun. ive never been a girl before so it's a lot#anyway i bought two super cool sexy dresses yesterday for the first time ever in my life#sexy dresses meaning up to my neck and down to my feet and past my elbows. kind of like a wardrobe straight out of the handmaid's tale#from (to quote my friend) ''*The* old lady store'' thanks man. well i think theyre pretty and its v exciting bc ive never been a girl befor#anyway#who wants me#i still use the name emil online btw and i honestly always will i think it's just so me and also i do still answer to he/him dw#in a man way not in a he/him lesbian way#''he's LGBTQA+'' what. all at once?#yes.#i have mastered them all i have collected all the genders and all the sexualities and ive never been ''wrong''#it just keeps switching. which is fine. well im a girl now. in a detransitioning man way. who is insanely attracted to men#but you will have to tear this lesbian label out of my cold dead hands#''you can't call urself lesbian if u have sex w men'' well first of all fuck you and second of all i am celibate so you dont need to worry#''what the hell are you talking about'' nothing. now look how hot i am#im just joking around i hope that's fine w y'all
38 notes
·
View notes
Text
BABE WAKE UP THEY'RE FINALLY LETTING RHAENYRA TARGARYEN KISS WOMEN ON TV
#house of the dragon#rhaenyra targaryen#lady mysaria#hotd#my posts#i'll be honest i barely care about whatever else is going on loll#that's not true i am loving the story#but the way i cheered for this...#my rhaenicent heart is thriving rn#we're a step closer folks!#also not even just happy she's with a woman i'm just happy she's with someone other than daemon#unpopular opinion i know but i just don't like him#not only has it never been clearer that he's just been using rhaenyra this whole time#but also his scenes these past few episodes have just been boring as hell#how many times do we need to watch daemon go on an acid trip??#what happened there? did they only have matt smith for a week or something and so had to just shoot the harrenhall scenes#and decided to spread those out and have daemon do nothing else the whole season?#also i know i'm very late to talking about the kiss... i was out of the country and only saw the last two episodes now!!#v excited about everything happening#yes this but also DRAGONS!! more of them!!#let's go dancing folks FINALLY#the babe wake up thing is from me to me 😂 i wish i had known sooner!
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
wanna be put in a room with craft stuff for 10 years
#i cant focus on anything rn but the stuff i wanna make and its turning my brain into mush#the weird brainfucked fear that if i dont get these things started Soon ill forget it#my memory is so fucking borked man and my brain runs too fucking fast to hold on to anything#i make so much that i went and made my own hell lol#the two jobs thing i think is probably the crux rn cause ive got even less time than i used to and my time blindness gives me troubles#ill get adjusted to it#sometimes with all my fucked up processing issues makes me feel like im kind of stuck in a weird bubble#like i have no idea whats happening or whos around me or what people are saying and i just have to stumble through it yknow#shouldve been born as a tiktokers pet snail#not tryna be complainy or in a bad mood or nuffin im fine i literally just want to be making stuff rn#even though works like a big Thing its also been understimulating the past week because theres nothing to do i just gotta Be Here#i need to be put under pressure i need squeezed i need smushed and i aint getting that#if i ever make something for u plz hound me about it#so i can explain in excruciating detail what step im on and how im doing it and what still needs done and how ill do THAT#i should make tutorials#i feel like im way too stream of consciousness to make anything actually helpful#idk i want a toast chee
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
WIP time >:]
tfw ur new boyfriend that you've definitely only liked for the duration of your relationship and totally didn't spend over a decade desperately pining over likes u back.
#finally able to work on stuff after whatever the hell the past two weeks have been#also yes I promise that is in fact Ouyang. don't be alarmed by the smiling.#general ouyang#esen temur#my art
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Something weirdly specific for at least some of us, that we've had in mind for awhile; unfortunately this was the closest we could get with a picrew tbh.
× × × || × × × || × × ×
Like, fortunately for us; while we have some things that irk us with this one, but this hits pretty close in a metaphorical sense at least for the people we're thinking of. Unfortunately for us, some of those are more obvious than others so we hesitated on weather we needed to share this or not LOL.
#stimboard#cn // highly personal#highly personal#GOD THAT PINK IN THE BACKGROUND. SO THREATENING.#THAT “SHE KNOWS” THING A MONTH BACK IN THE GAME SESSION. // OC-related tangent in the tags incoming#(<- hits differently in some situations)#(<- *stares at the plural OCs who we made an entire past for.*)#(<- *stares at the fact their whole thing is. dysphoria made them plural. and THEN they became functionally immortal.*)#(<- you don't skip town for no reason. they lived in a generation where being both would throw them in The Loony Bin)#(<- but only the QUEERNESS became more acceptable later on.)#(<- these bozos are a mirror to our own life and frustration. and that realistically. people are starting to accept endogenics to a degree.#(<- but the world we want and how endos are treated is NOT going to happen next yer. it MIGHT happen in like 20 years.)#(<- “she knows” has been and always will be our greatest fear and pushing through that is HARD.)#(<- So what would it look like INSTEAD to be hiding under queerness. which is still stigmatized as hell)#(<- but you can AT LEAST find a margin of community somewhere that isn't full of abusers and bootlickers/idenity-medicalists for that ID)#NONE OF THIS IS NEGATIVE we're actually kind of glad the GM saw the full implications of that even implicitly -#- getting the shivers just remembering that. But also it's interesting to implement that onto their younger singletsona lmao.#WERE SO PISSED THO THAT WE COULDNT FIND A GREYSCALE MASK THAT WASNT. HORROR OR PARTY. THESE FUCKERS ARE NOT VILLAINS YNKOW.#like how the fuck do we have a hoard of gifs in our tumblr likes and found NOTHING for that specifically lolsob?#yes these ARE the same two chucklefucks we blabbed on and on about for like a week on our main account.#but its their “singletsona”. kind of. kind of sort of. we have wholeass ideas on this narratively.#like we just need to WRITE as in actually write but the issue is every time we do we hit A Wall(tm)#but yeah. anyways. we have headmates playing a TTRPG and we may have projected our frustrations onto two OCs that we don't even play. 😭😭😭
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
I actually do like the trailer as a "meet the gang" trailer, I think it's fun and quirky in a good way. But it never should have been the launch trailer, and it was a massive marketing screw up to make it one
#Bioware has run out of goodwill these past years with two very poor launches and this game's notoriously embattled 10 year development#OF COURSE people were going to be all over the launch trailer when they've been waiting 10 years!#Of course people were going to be nervous about the state of the game given the above#And this trailer seemed designed to give them more things to be nervous about#The launch trailer should have been a story focused trailer and this trailer should have come out a few days to a week later#Also imagine some poor fucko who never played trespasser coming into this trailer. Absolutely zero idea what is going on#Also also especially with the name change and the announcement of an additional antagonist I think they really need#To start explaining what the hell is going on in this game#Not maintagging because I'm just being cranky
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
i said i wouldn’t do it this time but it’s 3am and mods asleep. boy
#welcome to another episode of Luke is insane abt hockey boy!#this time featuring a guy who is actually this time almost (ALMOST) confirmed to be queer#the almost is partly me being insane because I don’t trust anything anymore#but like. there are only so many reasons you wear pride converse. that is not ally behaviour#it just threw me this time I think bc I’d been like no. heterosexual. bc I think I became aware of him when he joined the real hockey team#because the OTHER problem is that the whole time I’d been thinking he was cute as hell (bc he is) and simultaneously being like no. bad.#anyway this meant that I have actually talked to him a bunch without overthinking it this term which honestly has been very cool#not like a whole lot but we’ve played together a decent amount and hopefully will keep doing that#and yesterday discovered hes recommending other people talk to me abt goalieing which is insane to me bc I am truly not that good#but apparently I made an impression!#anyway it does not help that this guy has gotten incredibly good at hockey in the past few months#idk man I make bad decisions (I say as if this was a decision) bc it is now the end of term once again <3#which means absolutely nothing can or will happen until after summer. which isn’t an issue#I’m just frustrated by my tendency to realise these things right before I’m about to not see the guy for X period of time#I also desperately need to stop crushing on hockey boys I swear but in my defence that is the main way I meet people#I think I’m cursed actually. that would explain many things#anyway he also has exams until next Tuesday which means he’ll be at hockey next week but idk abt this week which is devastating#i just wanna have talk to the guy more honestly to see how that goes bc we’ve not rlly talked individually for an extended time yknow.#in other words we have not had A Conversation it’s been groups or like quicker exchanges#he’s kinda quiet but i can’t quite tell which way yknow. I know he’s Watching basically all the time. and he is slightly awkward#which is also kinda cute. he gets a lil rambly when he talks abt hockey and I wanna push that button more#i. topsy if you’re reading this you’re gonna laugh so hard I just realised. he’s captain of the team now.#which sidenote is INSANE bc he started playing with them THIS YEAR#but oh my god. okay.#anyway. I need to start complimenting guys more for multiple reasons but also#1. he dresses very cool 2. he caught me looking at his shirt last week without saying anything (BEFORE I caught the rainbow converse)#i compliment women on their clothes and jewellery and hair and shit all the time but I do not with men bc. I mean do I need to explain.#but this is so unfair I am haunted by existence of boy and here we are once again. posting on tumblr with the possibility of seeing him lik#two more times before summer. might be three or four depending on what he comes to#luke.txt
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#fearandhatred#on the canvas syllabus for one of my modules our ta included pre-tutorial instructions to form groups and bring an item to share#but the thing is i have no way of reaching any of my tutorial classmates because i don't even know who the hell they are#and i missed the first tutorial which was on zoom anyway so like. useless#also we haven't had a face to face lecture in the past two weeks. the first time was because of chinese new year#but the second time our professor didn't even give a reason so like what the fuck#anyway i don't think it's that big of a deal because this isn't like a graded presentation just class participation at most#but idk whether the rest of my classmates have already formed groups if they know each other (none of my friends are taking this module)#so yeah i have been mildly nauseous for the past 2 days because of this. thanks prof#anyway the tutorial is today! in 12 hours. we will see how it goes. maybe i'll just derealise and then i won't feel anything <3#not giving af is not going well#hell week lol. goodnight#actually no fuck you there's a reason no other professor has ever done this and why it's always pre-allocated groups at the very least#how do you expect communication between students from like 500 different majors with no actual main communication channel#that is not how it works in our college bro i'm about to start insulting you in malay i'm so serious. bodoh
2 notes
·
View notes