#because work and a bunch of Problems

[rawliverandgoronspice]

So. I was having a Big Sad about stuff (thanks to everybody for the well wishes <3), so I did something unwise but probably inevitable.

I have finally acquired Skyward Sword.

[beyondthisdarkhouse]

After months of research and development and market testing and perfecting the first item I feel confident selling online, I have realized... that it is an incredibly niche item that only a specific subset of absolute nerds would want to buy, and I will have to do a ton of explaining the basic idea over and over again before people generally get what it is I'm even selling. RIP me

[areyoudoingthis]

I am SO grateful that ed and stede exist as characters exactly as they are. I'm so grateful for these two men who are traumatized and messed up and struggle to even like themselves, who are terrible at communicating, who make enough mistakes between the two of them to fill an entire ocean. I am so grateful to watch them struggle and be seen and be loved and reach out for the things they want and are maybe starting to believe that they deserve. I'm so grateful that the show lets them fall in love and get together exactly as they are, that it doesn't say they need to wait until they've become some unattainably perfect version of themselves before they have permission to have that. i am so grateful for ofmd

[thegreatyin]

And thus, with the passing of 24 hours, Caeru's ambition truly comes to an end. Major Nemesis spoilers below the cut- we're talking endgame ambition business here. Mostly on a character RP front.

The Doomed Scientist made quite a few... choice decisions, in the end. Killing Cups once and for all, recording his story as one of grief-

And sparing what little remained of Mr Mirrors, leaving it free to roam Parabola as it sees fit.

Some of them, he can explain. Others, he's still left to feel... discontent.

Cups needed to die. That much was certain from the start. It was a tyrant, as all Masters are, and complicit in the bargaining and eventual destruction of four (potentially five) cities, as all Masters are. It was an obstacle. A murderer. A petty monster that felt no remorse even on its deathbed, and it went out of its way to ruin multiple lives just because it felt owed its own sick and twisted idea of revenge.

It killed his first love. It looked him in the eyes and he knew what it had done and he knew from the start it was going to die.

Perhaps, in the end, it knew too. And yet it still pleaded, and wanted to live, and-

It made a bargain.

A bargain Caeru didn't take.

Not because he didn't want to. Gods, he wanted to. He wanted it. He wanted it more than anything else in the world. To have Greylu back, to give him the gift of life, of love, to show him the wonders of the Neath and the beauty of the correspondence and all of the people Caeru has met and loved and found home with along the way-

But. He couldn't.

Because Cups was a monster. And no matter what, it deserved to die. And he could not, in good conscience, allow it to live.

Even if sparing it meant everything he's ever wanted.

So he's left here, now. With a bloodied traveling coat, and a bloodsoaked knife, and a favor finally fulfilled.

And nothing to live for. No resurrected lover, no charming visits to Helicon, no slow dances in the living room, no memories to rebuild and lives to live and he won't live again-

Nothing. All he has is a coat born of obligation, not to his love, but to people he's never even met. To lives he's never even touched. To a paramour, still alive, with hair of rose-pink, who doesn't even remember her own brother's existence.

Cups didn't die for Caeru's sake. Cups died for the sake of all who wanted it dead. For the revenger's court, and the ghost screaming in his ear, and the reckoning that will not be postponed indefinitely.

And Caeru, who acted as a tool to carry out their wills? Who all but betrayed his own lover, just to satisfy a cause he never knew existed?

All Caeru is left with, is regret. Regret-

-And grief.

[sysig]

Coding woes (Patreon)

[ray-elgatodormido]

Haha! Princess Bride reference!

I started doing a thing testing out some stuff and ended up with DW Origins Lady Yan/Merah. Upon consideration I came to the conclusion that she would absolutely terrorize the MC like an otome isekai manhwa/manhua villainess unless he befriends her. Poor baby.

I am going to play this game like a yaoi dating sim because that’s what Koei gets for robbing us. I consider making a YouTube channel and record my unhinged commentary instead of just putting it on my instagram story. Anyway more Merah stuff. I really like how the dress and hair came out.

Here’s a profile view and doodle.

This poor baby omg.

DW Merah is a bit of a rich mean girl at first. But she is essentially putting up a shield against a world who would (and has) mistreat her for being a foreign woman. She’s making herself unapproachable to ward off people who would pick on her if she appeared vulnerable. It’s earned her a reputation for having a bad temper and being a pain to deal with. (high ranking officers being on the receiving end a lot of the time) She’s very wary of pretty much anyone, but never actively picks on those who are weaker, she really just wants to be left alone. Her character arc is about opening up and put away the cold hearted facade. With Lü Bu or anyone she trusts, that warm and playful personality shines through. She is ruthless with her enemies and ballsy regardless though. She is unpredictable too, not always what she appears, ex: she’s not easy to fool even when giving the impression of being a bit airheaded. Not too different from Wo Long Merah, just executed differently. I hope I’m making sense.

Also makes for some delightfully entertaining interactions with Diao Chan.

Sketch dump time.

DW8 Lady Yan. Bad armor. Questionable fashion. But she ate anyways.

No amounts of exaggerated man cleavage will ever change how much I hate DW8 Lü Bu’s look. A pain to draw and he is going to stab himself in the stomach by leaning over. *dying gargoyle noises*

She wouldn’t be very fond of Chen Gong. Literally looks down on him. Gotta add what little we know of the actual Lady Yan or at least the novel version. I mean it gives a better reason for Lü Bu to not listen to Chen Gong rather than “He stupid and wants to break someone’s kneecaps”. Chen Gong earns her trust in the hypothetical route which in turn earns Lü Bu’s trust.

Yes she is perfectly capable of lifting Chen Gong.

[liquidstar]

a friend who'd wait :)

[redysetdare]

People will always say "Write it down so you don't forget" And I tell them that won't work. That still requires that I remember that I wrote it down. it requires that I remember to look at the note I wrote to remember what i wrote down.

and they will say "Put it someplace you'll be forced to read/see it" And i tell them that won't work. The thing with my ADHD specifically is that it is trained to not notice things. the background is the background. If I'm not actively looking for something in the background then it does not register in my vision. If I put the note on my computer, instead of reading the note my brain is like "something is stopping me from doing the task so I will get rid of the thing stopping me from doing the task" and then suddenly the note is moved and unread. if i hang the note on a door or the fridge then my brain will not read the note on the door or the fridge because my brain is focused on doing a different task, usually exiting the door or looking in the fridge. why would i read a note on the fridge if my task is inside the fridge? I'll pin the note on my phone notifications but then it gets drowned out by my other notifications or i don't check my phone until it's too late.

Then they say "Set alarms" and i say that won't work because If I'm in the middle of a task then I'll snooze or dismiss it without ever reading it because I'm busy doing a different task. Sometimes i do read the alarm and I'll be like "I'll just finish this first" and then suddenly it's been hours and I still haven't done what the alarm was reminding me of. Some reminders don't have a specific time for me to need to remember them and so how can i set an alarm for something that doesn't have a time? how can i guess when I'll have free time to set an alarm reminder at that exact time?

And then they get mad at me. they say "you're not trying hard enough obviously" or "You're making this more difficult than it needs to be!" they get annoyed that I say their advice doesn't work. And I want to say "How do you think I feel?" because this isn't any easier for me. I'm the one living with these memory problems. I'm the one struggling with switching tasks. You don't have to live with this; I have to live with it every day of my life. forever.

[laugtherhyena]

3:23AM, time to post Hatamori fankid and retreat back into my hiding hole

[sagechan]

HUH??

tell me how a ship name gets oversexualized. what are you talking about it's a word

keep their names out of your morally purist mouth!! 💀

[lieutenantselnia]

Actually I think it's a bit unfair that I can't be an astrophysicist and a historian and a game developer and a marine biologist and an archaeologist and an author and a seamstress at the same time

[festivalfoxes]

part of the problem with writing is that i have often used writing as a way to hold my issues with the real world at enough of a distance that i can spin them around and play with them and vent some of the emotional distress that experiencing them has caused. however now when i am writing i have maybe 5 minutes before my hands start screeching at me and given as the major limitations imposed on me by physical disability is one of the Worst real-word problems i'm dealing with rn the distance evaporates and i'm just stressed and angry and tapped into emotions that i can't effectively vent or ignore. which sucks balls.

meanwhile i've primarily used visual art to enter a trance state where i have no thoughts beyond color and shape so while my hands still feel fuckedupbad after i've been holding a brush or tablet pen for hours i don't experience that pain while i'm creating and creating doesn't open the cap on my big bottle of feelings. so it doesn't make me have breakdowns to attempt.

also cause keyboarding is repetitive impacts on my fingertips that travel really well up my nerves and holding a brush/pen is just freezing my hand into a dreadful claw. hurts less overall.

[rotzaprachim]

you’re thinking about how easily massive numbers of the wildly antisemitic tankies would have been pulled into the actual political tenets of (esp early to mid 20th century) armed Zionism and you’re laughing?????

[oozeandgoo-art]

old drawing I never posted. i like these two freaks, I should draw them more

[arolesbianism]

Quick concept doodle for my worstie To the horizon

[cuteniarose]

Sometimes I wish I had more people interested in my creations, but then I get hit by thoughts like “Imagine the outrage you’d be faced with if your Avatar Suiren AU was more popular. This is the fandom that still cannot ‘forgive’ Korra for SOMETHING THAT WAS DONE TO HER, calling her the worst Avatar for losing the connection to her past lives (which came about because she HAD RAAVA LITERALLY RIPPED OUR OF HER) and acting like that is somehow a worse offence than, say, inaction leading to genocide. The hate you’d get for intentionally making Suiren the last Avatar would be IMMEASURABLE” and go “… actually, I’m glad that for the most part it’s just @katkastrofa and I–”

(Though then again… would it even be an AU by yours truly if it didn’t contain at least one cancellable offence? 😁)