#because somehow he can read most people but he was never able to read jun until it all becomes painfully obvious

[stormyoceans]

sorry i swear im shutting up forever after this but like. future junpo ten years down the line post thamepo break up would go so hard i wish i could write a 100k fic out of it

[ben-wisehart]

i've been running into 'shen yuan is only HIMSELF with sqh' and it baffles me. most of the time shen yuan is just verbally leaving sqh one star reviews on goodreads. that is a very specific mood and no more than 60% of anyone's full identity.

...LISTEN. Listen. Of course it's fair to say that SY/SQQ isn't able to fully express his true authentic self for much of the novel due to the role the System places him in! But "Peerless Cucumber" isn't his true authentic self either. It's just the side of himself he expresses most easily around Shang Qinghua. Am I only myself when I post memes on the internet?? Are the people who read my ramblings on tumblr dot com about one specific Chinese novel the only beings alive who truly know me, better than my own mother??

People are complicated! And it's just baffling to me because the side of himself that SQQ shows around SQH REEKS of performative masculinity. Does anyone ACTUALLY think "You don’t push down the righteous empress, are you fucking kidding me? Airplane, hand over the girlfriends, I’ll eat this book raw" is SY being himself?? His "true self" (whatever that is) does bleed through, especially in the way he talks about Binghe, but that's definitely not the self he is actively choosing to present the world.

I like SQQ and SQH's friendship well enough for what it is, but I've never really understood why they get portrayed as having this, like, deep and universe-defining connection. I can see them having fun together and bonding over their shared history, but come on. They're not soulmates. They actually don't even know each other that well. Shang Qinghua was literally the LAST person to figure out that Shen Qingqiu was gay. Throughout the entire novel I barely got the impression that they even liked each other; when Shang Qinghua gets given the option to return home in the extras, the fact that he would never see Shen Qingqiu again doesn't even cross his mind, only Mobei-Jun.

idk. I DO think they're friends and have a certain fondness for each other, especially post-canon, but I just don't buy that it's somehow more special than SQQ's relationship with any of the other characters in the novel.

[shanastoryteller]

Wei Wuxian wakes up in a body that isn’t his in place he doesn’t know. His thoughts are shaky and scattered, and he looks at the array he’s woken up in and the notes scattered around and understands that whoever did this acted too soon, that they should have waited a couple more months if they wanted the celestial alignment to be perfect, but they didn’t, and now he’s panicking and confused and he doesn’t think, only feels.

He breaks out of the miserable little room with ease and runs without thinking of the direction, all his emotions too close to the surface, like they wouldn’t have been if this Mo Xuanyu had just waited a little longer.

Which is how he finds himself sneaking into Lotus Pier, stumbling to the main hall, freezing and dirty and not totally sure how he made the journey, and not coming back to his body until there are fingers around his wrist and his brother’s furious eyes are glaring at him. “Who are you? What the hell are you doing here?”

They’re alone, almost, a teenager in Jin colors standing to the side with his sword drawn, but Wei Wuxian can’t focus on that now. “Jiang Cheng,” he says, voice cracking. “I don’t understand what’s happened. I don’t know why I’m here, I,” he wilts, pressing his head to Jiang Cheng’s shoulder, and for some reason he lets him. “I wasn’t supposed to come back and everything hurts.” Not physically, although he’s not doing great there either, but deeper, in his bones and his chest.

There’s a moment of silence, then, “Wei Wuxian?”

“Don’t pull your blow this time,” he says, “It hurts so much, didi, just make it stop.”

“Wei Wuxian,” he says again, and there’s the anger, but it’s not alone, grief and outrage and a tenderness that he never thought he’d hear again, “you came home.”

He really can’t be blamed for passing out then.

~

Jin Ling has heard a lot of terrible things about Wei Wuxian, has watched his uncle torture and rage against every demonic cultivator he’s come across, so he’s unprepared for his uncle’s reaction to the real thing.

He’s even more unprepared for the discovery that Wei Wuxian’s golden core is now in Uncle’s chest, but at least he’s not alone in that. It all comes out after that, when Wei Wuxian wakes up and Uncle confronts him about his lack of golden core, and the whole truth comes tumbling out of his mouth, his eyes so wide and his body trembling like he’s not even sure of what he’s saying, and then he passes out again, and –

And it makes it very hard to hate him, is the thing, especially when he wakes up again and is more settled and horribly embarrassed and smiles at Jin Ling like he’s the most precious thing in the world even when calling him a brat. Uncle and Wei Wuxian have several more arguments behind closed doors after that, and slowly the tension Uncle has carried around starts to easy, and, well.

Jin Ling likes him, this other uncle he’s been taught to hate, who’s not what anyone thought he’d be or like the stories he’d been told, now that he can see how Uncle loves him so much even when he tries to hide it behind rage, now that he sees Wei Wuxian can read Uncle easily, like no one but Jin Ling has seemed to ever be able to do.

~

The problem, Jiang Cheng decides, one week after Wei Wuxian’s return, is that they’re hiding two different people. Wei Wuxian, obviously, who is an another person’s body and so should be able to keep his identity a secret easily enough unless he does something stupid. But they’re also hiding Mo Xuanyu, who ran away from his family and who people will certainly notice and recognize.

He digs out a chest of A-jie’s things, stuff she hadn’t taken to Jin Tower because she knew she wouldn’t be able to use them, and he’d never been able to get rid of them, and figures that this will cover all the things that get tangled in his throat whenever he tries.

He drops the chest in front of Wei Wuxian and says, “Here. This should work.”

~

Lan Xichen has heard rumors that Jiang Wanyin has been courting a young lady, some new addition to the Jiang clan, but since that goes against mostly everything he knows of Jiang Wanyin, he dismisses it. He decides that may have been a mistake when, after granting Jiang Wanyin’s request to come to Cloud Recesses to make use of the Lan library for a research project and to iron our several details for the upcoming cultivation conference, he doesn’t show up alone.

Not that Lan Xichen had expected him to show up alone, exactly, since he’s a sect leader on official sect leader business, and that always involved some sort of retinue, but it’s who he shows up with, exactly.

There is a young woman. She walks at his side, as if they’re equals, her voice low and raspy but bright. She has dark brown wavy hair that she wears mostly down, only two strands on either side pulled back from her face, no ribbon in her hair although there’s one around her throat. Her robes seem familiar to him, although he can’t place why. She’s too skinny, which isn’t an aesthetic observation so much as a medical one. She has her hand on Jiang Wanyin’s arm as they climb and he doesn’t think it’s a coincidence that Jin Ling is walking directly behind her, his brow furrowed. Should she slip and fall, he’ll be able to catch her easily.

Her chatter stutters to a stop when they get closer and her dark grey eyes meet his squarely. “Zew-Jun,” Jiang Wanyin says, giving him a slight bow that the woman echoes. It’s telling that the disciples and Jin Ling don’t bow until she does. “Thank you for your hospitality.”

“And your library!” the woman pipes up, a large grin stretching across her mouth.

“Can’t we at least get the introductions out of the way before you embarrass me?” Jiang Wanyin snaps harshly.

Lan Xichen startles but the woman just laughs. “You just make it so easy, A-Cheng!” He hasn’t heard anyone call Jiang Wanyin that since his sister’s death. Before he can formulate any sort of response to this, she bows to him again and says, “I am Wu Yingtai. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Zewe-Jun. Thank you for your hospitality.”

“It’s no problem,” he says, but he’s distracted enough that his mouth is running on autopilot. He recognizes her robes.

They’re Jiang Yanli’s. Jiang Wanyin has given his beloved sister’s clothes to this woman to wear.

Maybe he is courting her.

~

Lan Wangji knows that Jiang Wanyin is here with some of the Jiang disciples. That he’s here on actual business and so that one of his disciples can make use of the Lan library, all proper and acceptable, but it still makes him burn. He elects to take his meals at home rather than the deal with that, which he can do for everything but dinner.

His mind is on the upcoming meal which is why he doesn’t notice someone running by and then running into him. They bounce off his side and he reaches out automatically, his arm curling around a concerningly slim waist to keep them from falling to ground. “Oh shit, I’m sorry,” says an unfamiliar voice with a familiar cadence that leaves his whole body cold and makes his arm tighten without his permission. He looks down and equally shocked grey eyes stare up at him. “Lan – um, I mean, Hanguang-Jun, I was just, um. Hello.”

He abruptly realizes that this is entirely improper, that he’s holding her against his chest, and he lets go of her and takes several steps back. “I apologize.”

“What?” Her nose scrunches up and he fees a deep ache in his chest. “That was totally all my fault, don’t apologize. You saved me from tripping and getting mud all over me! Although maybe that would be an improvement on the ink, A-Cheng is going to give me such a bitchy look about this, which, whatever, I’ll be able to get it out later.”

He looks at her less closely, mentally stepping back so he’s not getting lost in details that shouldn’t hurt so much now, thirteen years later. She does indeed have ink staining her hands and her sleeves, and drops of it across the bottom of her robes, somehow. Her clothes are a pale lavender and there’s a silver lotus bell in her belt. “You’re with the Jiang.”

“Hm? Oh yeah, of course, me and Jiang Cheng are friends.” There is something in the way she says that, like it’s not a lie but not the whole truth, but he’s entirely uninterested in Jiang Wanyin’s business so he doesn’t care.

“There is no running in Cloud Recesses,” he says instead.

She bursts out laughing, a bigger sound than it seems like could come from her small body, and he hates the way his heart ticks a couple beats faster. “Ah, Hanguang-Jun, my apologies. Shall I copy the rules a hundred times to make up for this grand transgression? I was only trying not to be late to dinner. I lose track of time when I’m researching.”

This woman is strange. She’s not inappropriate, exactly but she’s far too familiar. Not technically crossing any boundaries, but people do not talk at him like this, warm and joking. No one has spoken like this to him in thirteen years and abruptly he hates her with a ferocity he knows is unfair and misplaced, but he doesn’t have anywhere to put it. “Goodbye,” he says, cold and too brusque, moving past her and not offering to walk her to the dining hall like he would have if she were anyone else, if she had not committed the grand and unknowable offence of reminding him a little bit too much of Wei Ying when he hadn’t been prepared for it.  

[hanascrisis]

A REVIEW: Scum Villain’s Self Saving System (MXTX)

I. GENERAL OVERVIEW

LENGTH: 81 Chapters and 20 Extras

GENRE: (BL) Chinese Cultivation Novel - Historical Period

MAIN COUPLE:  Luo Binghe and Shen Qingqiu

BRIEF SUMMARY: After binge reading legendary harem stallion web novel “Proud Immortal Demon Way”, Shen Yuan (a millennial increasingly frustrated by the story’s outrageous and senseless plot) dies choking on food and transmitigates into the novel... as the villain shizun of the main protagonist, Shen Qingqiu. Shen Yuan, now Shen Qingqiu, must navigate through the original PIDW’s plot points to gain the favor of the original protagonist, Luo Binghe, to avoid being tortured and cut into a human stick. However, in doing so, Shen Qingqiu eventually finds that the original plot changes, awakening new feelings in the protagonist previously unexplored. 

II. CATEGORICAL RANKING & BREAKDOWN

This was my second danmei novel I had ever read, and one that really helped. familiarize me with the ins and outs of the typical cultivation novel tropes. With Shen Qingqiu’s unfortunately relatable inner monologging complete with millennial, largely inappropriate vocabulary AND emoticons was undeniably very entertaining, and I spent the majority of the book laughing along with his misfortune. It was a book in which the reader got to experience the stereotypical romance, adventure, and fantasy tropes through the lens of a character living out these tropes with a mindset not so dissimilar from our own. With that, let’s move on to my personal categorical rankings for this novel.  

1. CHARACTERIZATION ~ Rated 7/10

With every single character within this book, I can confidently say I really liked their characterization. Each character’s personality was constructed in a way that did not adhere to one stereotype, and the interactions between characters never felt stale or forced (especially in a book where Shen Qingqiu has a sudden change in personality, I was worried these interactions with characters such as Yue Qingyuan and Liu Qingge would be strange, but it was indeed quite cute and funny). Even with the minor characters that seemed to be the main antagonists Tianlang Jun, their characterizations and relationship still had a familial sense of warmth that made them feel a lot more human. However, due to the length of the book, not all the side characters were really flushed out in terms of backstory. 

With the main protagonist, Luo Binghe, as to deviate from the original “black hearted protagonist” of PIDW, his back story and past abuses led to his motivations as a person being a lot more complex, deeper, and especially tragic. Through the novel we are able to see that the original protagonist crafted from resentment started out as a boy too naive, with a heart full of warmth and kindness, only to be bludgeoned and abandoned over and over again. Even by the end of the book, in interactions with Shen Qingqiu, we can still evidently see Luo Binghe’s past emotional trauma within his feelings of inadequacy and his villainization at the peak. I personally really liked this new depth of character that gave me a new perspective on his actions and motivations. Generally, I also love the change in Binghe’s demeanor when he’s around Shen Qingqiu vs. anyone else, and one can easily forget how manipulative, cunning, and overpowered he is as the “protagonist”. He is endearing and I love him so much, but that’s deviating from the original point.

As discussed previously, Shen Qingqiu’s character, while having a. fairly distinct personality, is almost a self-insert character that the reader can. project on directly. While I THOROUGHLY enjoyed his narration throughout (which served as much needed comic relief), I personally wished there to be a little more character development, especially regarding the paradigm shift that occurred in his mindset and attitude towards the other characters in the book. At the beginning of the novel, there is a certain subconscious wall Shen Qingqiu creates, where he thinks of the other people as strictly “character from PIDW with concrete fates and personailites”, which is especially evident in the way he treated Luo Binghe post-Immortal alliance conference. But overtime, there is a subtle shift in which by the end of the book, we see Shen Qingqiu resolve some misunderstandings (to an extent) and see him start to regard the characters around him as true people that he can build deep relationships with. I personally wanted this aspect to be highlighted a little more and that this had good potential in being an essential piece of plot could have led to more resolution (discussed below). 

2. WORLD BUILDING ~ Rated 9/10

From my perspective, especially in cultivation novels, world building becomes exceedingly important in order to aid the reader in understanding the power structure and dynamic of the cultivation world, which reflects in the interactions between characters of different factions. Because of Shen Qingqiu’s commentary as a “reader of PIDW”, I felt the author was able to do a stellar job in explaining the different dynamics within the sect and between the different peak lords, as well as major conflicts between demons. Hence, it was really easy to understand and follow how the world revolved around each of the conflicts, as well as justify some of the characters’ motivations within SVSSS. 

3. PLOT DEVELOPMENT ~ Rated 8/10

What I found extremely compelling about the plot of this book in particular is that it is a lot more complex and darker than the audience originally grasps. With my first read, I found the book hilarious through and through, and couldn’t get enough of the comedic aspects and commentary that seemed to seep through to even the most serious moments. But as I started to think back on some of the events that ended up transpiring, I came to the realization that the plot itself is extremely tragic. If one were to think about the book from Luo Binghe’s perspective, as a child abandoned with no one to care for and love him, to then finding someone who cherishes him and believes in him, only to have that very same person push him off a cliff and have him experience hell for the next 5 years; frankly the plot is really devastating. That’s also what makes it such an interesting book to read and then reread. 

Another aspect of the plot that is notable is how outrageous some of the events are, especially when thinking from a logical perspective. From Shen Qingqiu dying and growing a new body underground, to the thousands of elephant demons (?) that Luo Binghe gathers, one is simply overwhelmed by how random the book is sometimes. Even better, we get to witness this exact reaction through Shen Qingqiu, as someone to transmitigated into this nonsensical book. Hence, somehow the book manages to be completely unrelatable, yet also very relatable, hitting both extremes in a perfect equillibrium.

My main reservation/criticism of the plot is personally~ I felt that it lacked a little bit of resolution in some of the major plot points, such as “Bingge”, as well as the Bingqiu relationship. A lot of the original misunderstandings and misgivings between Shen Qingqiu during and after the 5 years (pre-relationship) weren’t really resolved. It sort of left me wanting some more development from Binghe where his is able to heal from his past to a certain extent. Regarding Shen Qingqiu, I also wanted to see more development with him in terms of his obvious shift in mindset from viewing the people around him as characters from the original PIDW, to actual people whose fates aren’t predetermined. It could be a fun idea to explore more. But these are just small things that really don’t take away from the experience that is reading SVSSS. 

III. FINAL THOUGHTS

RECOMMENDATION: YES I DO RECOMMEND IT , especially for people who enjoy comedy, modern humor mixed with ridiculous xianxia plot points, and an action filled BL cultivation novel. It really is an absolute joy to read and all the characters are so endearing in their own way - Luo Binghe with his selective duality and various complexes, Shen Qingqiu with his alleged “straigtness” and internalized heteronormativity, Tianlang Jun with his desire to be a malewife, the misunderstandings in the relationship between Shen Qingqiu and Zhuzhi Lang, etc. etc. It is really a fun read and I thoroughly enjoyed it. This concludes my first casual book review haha.  

[wangxianficrecs]

Follower Recs

Stories I haven’t read yet, but clearly need to put on my ever-expanding List.

~*~

Welcome back queen [Thank you, it’s so lovely to be back!] if ur still doing follower recs I gotta recommend I would wait for a thousand years by bleuett it’s soooooooo good

[This one was actually recced to me by two different people, the other of whom said, “ Maybe I'm crying a little so I feel like a should recommend ���I would wait for a thousand years’ by bleuett on ao3.”]... it’s def. on my List!

I would wait for a thousand years

by bleuett (T, 10k, wangxian)

Summary:  During the worst of winter, a traveler comes to stay at Lan Wangji's inn. He wears a red ribbon in his hair.

“Do you see the rabbit?” Wei Ying asks and points at the moon. “That’s the moon rabbit, he helps make Chang’e more immortality elixir. He keeps Chang’e company.”

“I do not wish the rabbit for company,” Lan Wangji says tightly. “You are the one I want by my side.”

“And I’m here, Lan Zhan. If you go to the moon, I’ll follow you, I’ll always be here now.”

~*~

I just read a great fic by aisthuu "every love story is a ghost story", didn't see it in your recs so wanted to recommend it! LWJ is a guqin composer and teacher, buys a cheap guqin off eBay which ends up being attached to WWX's spirit from canon era. It's bittersweet, LWJ deals with Lan's homophobia (implicit in a Lan way) and his feelings towards the ghost. This is author's only ao3 fic and honestly I don't remember how I stumbled upon it, but I'm happy I did and hope you will enjoy it too!  [I’ve recently read this one, and loved it!]

every love story is a ghost story

by aisthuu (M, 59k, wangxian, my bookmark)

Summary:  The man is in Lan Zhan’s bed. Did they—he begins to wonder, eyes trailing to where the man’s body lies under the blanket. Had Lan Zhan—?

Then the sleep-fog clears and Lan Zhan realizes that the young man isn’t quite opaque around the edges.

“You’re a spirit.”

The spirit narrows its eyes. “I’m so much more than that.”

(Lan Zhan buys a guqin off eBay for a suspiciously low price, only to find that it’s haunted. And now there’s a ghost in his bed.)

~*~

Ok so I absolutely have to rec "see you yesterday" by glyphic. It's a wip, but it's currently at 101k so there's a whole lot there, and it's terrible and wonderful and beautiful all at once. The way the backstory of canon events is adapted to the modern-with-cultivation setting is brilliant, and then there's the amnesia, and then there's the time loop. This fic lives permanently rent-free in my brain.

see you yesterday

by glyphic (M, 101k, wangxian, WIP)

Summary:  

Wei Ying 21:09 hey lan zhan what’s the weirdest way youve died

Lan Zhan 21:11 Falling encyclopedias.

Wei Ying 21:12 omg no way that’s so rude turning books against you???

Lan Zhan 21:13 A betrayal I will never forget.

On Halloween night, an exiled demonic cultivator and a Lan disciple get stuck in a time-loop, find each other, and try to figure it all out.

~*~

If you are looking for recs for yourself I absolutely love (the complete!) story Just as the Snow Melts by draechali on AO3. It's a canon divergence where everyone lives, even WWX! ~ @airmidcelt

Just as the Snow Melts

by draechaeli (T, 67k, wangxian)

Summary:  Like a snowy mountain top in spring the residents of the Burial Mounds trickled down the mountain and joined the flow of society.

“I went to the Burial Mounds,” Lan WangJi said.

“Ah, yeah… I’m sorry Lan Zhan,” replied Wei WuXian, “I hadn’t thought anyone would come to visit. I am still not sure how it happened; I brought A-Yuan to Yiling to play by the river and then ended up somehow teaching a bunch of children swimming and writing along with him.”

~*~

Hello! It's come to my attention that you have not as yet read Grandmaster of Meme-onic Cultivation! Please do! It's the only thing that gave me joy during 2020 😆 like proper belly laughs and disney villain style cackling. It is a wip, and it is long but so so worth it!! The author has reworked the entire canon through these message crystals and still conveys complex characters despite the tricky format. It's just so good!! Highly highly recommend it! ❤ ~ @theladypeartree  [Oh!  I’ve been subscribed to this one, and know that @swaglexander-the-great is a reliable provider of Hilarity, so I’m excited for it to be finished!]

Grandmaster of Meme-onic Cultivation 

by Hades_the_Blingking (T, 49k, wangxian, WIP)

Summary:  The Untamed universe is exactly the same, except everybody has magical crystals that have a suspiciously familiar messaging system. The story is pretty much the same as the show, except everyone lives!! (so minor changes).

or in which Wei WuXian tries his darndest to date Lan Zhan, Jiang Cheng possibly has a aneurysm, Jin ZiXuan is still the most awkward human alive, and Xue Yang makes me write some VERY cursed things. Written in chatfic format! :3

~*~

Chomrafy on AO3 deserves love and encouragement; she’s written a body of compact, poetic, and eloquent shortfics each of which can stand alone, but that comprise an intricately cross-referential and mostly internally-consistent universe. They’re grouped as chapters in works according to theme; for example, “in cupped hands” focuses upon Jin Ling and his second-generation baggage; “Departure in Autumn” portrays the last years of WWX’s first life. Follow the tag “Chomrafy’s MDZS shortfics.” [I don’t see this tag?]

in cupped hands

by chomrafy (G, 2k, wangxian)

Summary:  Of secrets, of futures, of love. A Jin Ling-centric collection of 200-word fics.

Ch.1: Jin Ling repays a debt (JL, JC, & WWX). Ch.2: Jin Ling and a ghost in the mirror. (JL & JYL) Ch.3: A matter of friends (JL & the other kids) Ch.4: In this house we don't keep dogs (JC & WWX) Ch.5: In the end, he remains silent (JL & uncles) Ch.6: A first night hunt, of sorts (JL & the other kids) Ch.7: Jin Ling, forgiving, forgetting (JL & LXC & JGY) Ch.8: Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling argue (JL, JC, & WWX) Ch.9: Jin Ling and his father (JL & JC) Ch.10: Jin Ling speaks up (JL, JC, & WWX) Ch.11: Jin Ling and a piece of home (JL, JC, & WWX)

Departure in Autumn

by chomrafy (not rated, 6k)

Summary:  Four perspectives. A steady march to the end.

Ch.1: Because if anything happens to them, Wen Qing would never be able to heal with these hands again. Ch.2: As long as this is still home, Jiang Yanli will wait as long as she needs to. Ch.3: Five times Jiang Cheng reaches for Wei Wuxian, one time he turns away. Ch.4: Whether the road is broad or narrow, bright or dark, they would have to keep walking. Wei Wuxian digs Wen Qing's grave.

~*~

Hello, hope all is going well. I don't have an ask, by I do have a recommendation. I read this fic a while ago and found it again. I just wanted to recommend this for everyone. Let me know what you think please. Thank you. [Oh!  This one’s in my To Read list, but  I’d forgotten about it.  Mmmm, fox!wwx and dragon!lwj.]

Ten miles of Lotus Flowers

by Yukirin_Snow

M, 274k, wangxian

Summary:  He was a mischievous fox spirit, wreaking havoc where he went, about to depart on a journey that would span centuries.

He was a heavenly prince, a proud dragon destined to ascend the throne to become emperor.

Neither expected their paths to collide over the span of three lives.

~*~

I forgot if it was your blog 😥 that recommended “Bestseller” (when Wei Wuxian writes the Xianxia cut-sleeve equivalent of Fifty Shades of Grey, based entirely on his experiences with Lan Wangji, he doesn’t expect it to become the next big hit) (https://archiveofourown.org/works/21528316/chapters/51318766)

But OMG IT WAS HILARIOUS!!! I LOVED IT!! And if it wasn’t your blog, I’m so sorry for how weird this sounds 😭😭😭😭 I just loved this fic so much that I have to tell it to someone 😢 [It’s on my List, but I haven’t read it yet!]

Bestseller

by pupeez4eva

M, 8k, wangxian

Summary:  He had written the book to prove a point. It was never supposed to be a big thing, and he certainly never intended for everyone — Jiang Cheng, Zewu-Jun, the Juniors, literally everyone— to be reading about his sex life.

Oh God, he definitely needed to make sure Lan Zhan didn’t find out about this.

(Or, when Wei Wuxian writes the Xianxia cut-sleeve equivalent of Fifty Shades of Grey, based entirely on his experiences with Lan Wangji, he doesn’t expect it to become the next big hit).

~*~

I’d like to rec On Your Marks, Get Set, Bake! by @blackwiresgrowonherhead

It’s one of my absolute favorites and I laughed out loud so many times when reading it

on your marks, get set, bake!

by BlackWiresOnHerHead

G, 41k, wei wuxian & juniors

Summary:  Jin Ling resumes thumping on the door to room 721, and the small collection of freshmen starts chanting “Senior Wei! Senior Wei! Senior Wei!” with increasing volume until finally Wei Wuxian opens the door.

“Yes?” he says with his widest, most innocent eyes.

“Senior Wei!” demands Lan Jingyi, shoving himself to the front of the group. “Why didn’t you tell us you’re a contestant on this year’s season of The Great Gusu Bake Off?!?”

--

Several months ago, college student Wei Wuxian secretly competed in the most popular reality show in the country. The show starts airing in the fall. The freshmen in his dorm collectively lose their minds.

~*~

If you're in the mood for v. short ridiculous fun fic, may I suggest My chain hits my chest/When I'm bangin' on the radio by x_los It's 2k modern cultivators AU, featuring WWX calling LWJ's sword Bitchin' [omg I’m laughing so hard] and I think it's more fun going in blind?

My chain hits my chest/When I'm bangin' on the radio

by x_los

T, 2k, wangxian

Summary:  Lan Wangji finds he doesn't even need to call for help for Wei Wuxian to come running.

[excelsi-or]

welcome to svt (pt. 4)

Helloooo again lovely friends~~

Look at me being somewhat consistent. I hope you’re all well, staying safe, and enjoying the insane amount of content our boys are putting out these days. I haven’t gotten around to watching “In the Soop” yet, but I’m very excited. Also a comeback too??? And Jun and Minghao getting to go home?? Lots of stuff going on and I’m so happy and excited for it all.

Anyway, enjoy this next part~~  

chapter 4: trying for platonic

ch. 1 | ch. 2 | ch. 3 | ch. 4

w.c. 1.5k

pairing: lee jihoon x OC/fem reader

She never thought she’d be so content with a platonic relationship. Even with all of her longing for more.

But she understands that Jihoon’s not ready, and may never want or be ready for a relationship with her. So, she packages her feelings away every morning when they meet in the hallway to go to the gym.

And it’s been a year of that. A year of growing with Jihoon, of learning his body and him learning hers. He can read her face and know exactly what’s on her mind. She’s never been so in sync with someone and it scares her.

‘Eat.’ Jihoon sets a bowl of ramen next to her elbow.

She glances up and rubs her eye. ‘How are we supposed to do this job if I can’t even figure out the conveyor belt?’

Jihoon rolls his eyes and pushes the laptop away, replacing it with the ramen bowl. ‘Eat.’

‘Jihoon.’

‘Listen to me. You will figure it out. How? Because you always do. But we did not become the best team on empty stomachs.’ He forces the chopsticks into her hand. ‘Eat.’

And somehow that statement is true.

Not the empty stomachs part. They’ve done plenty on empty stomachs, but the best.

Somehow, in the year they’ve been with SVT, the other boys have acknowledged one universal truth.

‘You guys are getting good.’

‘You’ll be better than Cheol and Jeonghan hyung soon.’

‘How did you guys become the best?’

‘Call them in. They’ll be able to get us out of here.’

And it’s become customary for Seungcheol to send his best team in first. Especially on the ones where no locals have been involved and no recon has been done. Meaning the most difficult jobs. The ones that require the most skill.

‘You know I’m expendable,’ Jihoon snorts.

She huffs, typing up her report for Seungcheol. Never in her wildest dreams would she have imagined that Jeonghan and Seungcheol were the type to like reports. But every job ends in reports and receipts. Sometimes, the job starts to actually feel like a job.

Once she adds in a few sketches she’d done of some of the people they’d run into, she looks over at Jihoon. From her vantage point on the side of the bed, his face is lit up with Brazil’s afternoon sunshine. ‘Maybe to them you’re expendable.’ Her words soften as she says, ‘But to me, you’re irreplaceable.’

When Jihoon turns to her, an unreadable expression on his face, she adds, ‘If Jeonghan oppa dares gamble with your life again, I’ll kick his ass.’ She looks back to her computer screen.

‘They’re fighting for a good cause, you know that.’ He studies her, the way her dark hair cascades around her. When his fingers twitch in an urge to run a hand through her hair, he tears his gaze away to the busy city street.

While she’d been busy gaining control of the gemstones and uploading the information to out the secret and environmentally detrimental operation, Jihoon was in charge of fending off as many of the workers in the mine as he could while she did so. This had been under Jeonghan’s direction, which she had protested.

‘As soon as he’s out of my sight, I’m on my own,’ she told Jeonghan.

‘Hoon’s of better use to us giving you a way out.’

‘So what? He can get left behind? That sounds like you’re playing favourites.’

‘We’re trying to use our assets,’ Jeonghan argued.

‘You’re stressed out, Hannie, I get it; but this is not the way to go.’

‘You need to focus on what you’re doing,’ Jeonghan stated. ‘Let me deal with Hoon.’

‘You’re dealing with him is going to get the man killed, captured, or tortured.’

‘Well, what would you suggest we do then? Hmm?’

‘I would’ve preferred you and the boss in here risking your asses,’ she pauses as her upload finishes and then hurries downstairs to work on the conveyor belts, ‘but send Sol in here. So, I have an extra set of hands.’

‘You know—’

‘If you leave Hoon out here for dead, then I don’t know what I know,’ she retorted. ‘You sent us with Kwan and Sol, so we would have back up. And if it weren’t for you, I would have already called them in here. So, use them. Please.’

Her ‘please’ must have been effective, because about ten minutes later, she heard the reinforcements. Which was a good thing, because Jihoon had been backed into the cave she was in, and she’d had to join in the fighting. Fighting and rerouting gemstones is a bit too much multitasking.

The worst part about that conversation had been that Jihoon had heard it. Pieces of it. His focus had been on the physical fighting, as opposed to the verbal disagreement in his ear.

‘They’re fighting for a cause,’ she says, pulling his attention back to her, ‘but so am I.’

He lifts an eyebrow.

‘You. I can’t do this job without you.’

His ears go pink, and his eyes drop away. She’s learned Jihoon’s love language very quickly and peppers him in compliments when she can. For a man who can take on seven men, twice his size, on his own, his vulnerability around her is the most attractive part about him. It has provided their partnership with an interesting dynamic that they both enjoy.

‘Otherwise, I’ll die,’ she states. This gets Jihoon to crack a smile. And he can meet her eye again.

‘So let me deal with Jeonghan oppa and Cheolie. You just work on protecting my ass.’

He nods, a smile dimpling his cheeks. ‘I can do that.’ She nods and turns back to the computer. ‘And don’t you dare say you’re expendable to my face again.’

His phone dings, signalling Seungkwan and Hansol’s arrival downstairs. ‘Just behind your back then.’

She rolls her eyes, extremely endeared, and packs her bag. ‘Smart ass.’

‘I’d love to come along with you.’ Her hand touches the man’s chest affectionately, while simultaneously picking his chest pocket and snagging his key card.

Jihoon passes by, rolling his eyes at the flirting and taking the key card she slips into his hand. She never misses a beat in her conversation. This specific businessman goes on about his house in the Bahamas that they can visit. He insists that they can have a good time, that they don’t have to leave the house if she doesn’t want to.

‘I’ve never been to the Bahamas,’ she lies. ‘But if you’re willing to take me, I’d love to tag along.’ She pulls a napkin towards her and reaches for the pen inside his coat pocket. His eyes never leave her, and she can only smirk in response. Once she scribbles a number down, she slips out of her chair. ‘It was lovely speaking with you, but I can see one of my friends here now.’

‘Well, I’m glad they were late.’ He gently picks up her hand and kisses the back of it before she can disappear.

As she melds into the crowd, she ties her hair up into a bun and pulls her glasses off. Jihoon sidles up to her.

‘Your ability to flirt with every person you see is incredible.’

She chuckles but watches his face. She notices the small twitch of his brows, the pink of his ears. Gently, she finds his wrist and squeezes it. ‘I just gave him the bar’s number. Not any number of mine.’

Jihoon shrugs, though she can feel him relax in her grasp. She was about to let him go, using her backside to push a door open, when she catches a suspicious look from one of the other people in the party. Her hand eases into Jihoon’s and she tugs him closer. His hand reaches for her waist, his nose brushing hers.

Even though the close proximity only lasts two seconds, her breath still catches at the warmth of his hand through her dress. He guides them through the door, and they linger for a second in that position to let the door swings close behind them. Her eyes search his, but he pulls away before she can gather what he’s thinking. She leads him down the hallway to the elevator.

Jihoon doesn’t miss her glance at the camera out of her periphery.

‘I’ll remember that one,’ Jihoon promises.

They get into the elevator. She uses the railing around it to hoist herself to the grate in the top of the elevator.

‘We’re lucky that America still uses old elevators,’ Jihoon says as he watches her drag a backpack from the top of the elevator.

‘We’re lucky that the elevator doesn’t work on the top floor right now.’

Jihoon chuckles as she slings her backpack over her shoulder and unwraps the skirt of her dress to reveal black leggings beneath. ‘Right. Not just lucky that you figured out how to bust that elevator button so no one would be able to use it.’

She grins at him, as she shoves the skirt into her bag and pulls her laptop out.

Jihoon’s heart flips, so he turns to watch the numbers light up.

‘Hey.’

He waits.

‘You know, I wouldn’t hook up with someone when we’re working together.’

Jihoon nods. ‘Yeah, I know.’

‘No, Jihoon.’

Something in her voice causes him to look her way.

‘I mean that while we’re partners, I won’t hook up with somebody.’

Jihoon blinks at the intense statement. Before he can say anything, the elevator doors open, and the moment is over. She’s already on the move.

[robininthelabyrinth]

Fire and Light (ao3) - on tumblr: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6

- Chapter 7 -

There was an incident at the Cloud Recesses.

Nie Mingjue offered to go deal with it, and Wen Ruohan was so busy laughing at the sheer absurdity of the idea that he allowed Wen Xu to go in his stead, which was what they had all been hoping for. Nie Huaisang had come up with the idea of the staggered offer; he was surprisingly adept at predicting how Wen Ruohan would behave, which secretly worried Nie Mingjue more than a little.

(The plan did result in a few more ‘walks’, Wen Ruohan being temporarily reminded of Nie Mingjue’s existence, and Nie Huaisang was so upset by that side-effect that he wanted to resign from making any more plans in the future. That wasn’t plausible, of course, given where they lived, but Nie Mingjue would happily suffer a little if it meant that his little brother wouldn’t turn too scheming as a result of his success.)

Wen Xu returned a while later with a letter in his hand and a twitch in his eye that refused to go away for a while. He was of a nervous disposition, whether naturally or because of how he was raised, and his anxiety was only made worse by stress – the Nightless City, unfortunately, being full of stress. Wen Qing said that he used to be cruel and vicious, obtaining relief from his own pain only by hurting others; she said, with a little too much perspicuity given her age, that it was the inevitable result of his having found out long ago that there was no consequence to his actions and, moreover, that his meanness was the only quality of his of which his father seemed to approve. Nie Mingjue hadn’t seen much of that, except maybe for some arrogance in the beginning, but Wen Qing had rolled her eyes at him when he said as much, saying that of course he hadn’t seen it, it’d been different ever since Nie Mingjue showed up.

Why that made a difference, Nie Mingjue had no idea. He hadn’t done anything, or at least he hadn’t done it intentionally.

“What happened?” he asked. “Is –”

“A-Chao is fine, no thanks to Wen Zhuliu,” Wen Xu said, grinding his teeth in a way that would probably hurt his jaw and require copious amounts of Wen Ning’s medicinal soup later to ease the soreness and strain. “We were right about him trying to get A-Chao kicked out of the Cloud Recesses and dependent on him.”

“More brothels?”

“I wish. A-Chao has been refusing to go to them –”

According to the letters Nie Mingjue has seen from both Wen Chao himself and Lan Xichen, his reaction has been to all but burst into tears at the very thought – Wen Xu’s impassioned speech had apparently made a rather large dent in his impressionable psyche. He wouldn’t even risk walking thought a red-light district at night out of concern that he might succumb to some previously unknown predatory instinct and then die horribly as a consequence.

“– so Wen Zhuliu, shall we say, creatively interpreted his refusal into being a fear of disease.”

“I mean, it is a fear of disease,” Wen Qing said dryly. “Disease is how you scared him. With the information from my books, no less.”

“No, you don’t –” Wen Xu waved his hands, looking distressed. More distressed than usual, even. “On second thought, maybe I shouldn’t be talking about this with you lot. You’re all far too young. Mingjue, you understand what I mean?”

“I have no idea what you mean,” Nie Mingjue said blankly. “You haven’t even said anything yet.”

“He’s saying that Wen Zhuliu brought A-Chao a girl he could be certain wasn’t diseased,” Nie Huaisang said, his nose wrinkled. “Let me guess, the ‘incident’ in question was A-Chao being accused of rape? Probably someone young?”

“How did you figure that out?” Wen Xu demanded.

“I read a lot of pornography,” Nie Huaisang said. “Some of it involves less savory subjects.”

“Did I know you were reading about less savory subjects?” Nie Mingjue demanded, a little appalled. “Huaisang, everything we said about A-Chao being too young applies to you too, you know –”

“I read it for the art, da-ge. And the insight into what people like when they think other people aren’t looking; it’s surprisingly transferable to the rest of life. Anyway, since you’re here without A-Chao, I take it that he got out of it?”

“When he saw the girl lying in his bed, he remembered all of Mingjue’s scolding,” Wen Xu said. “He immediately ran out to find an adult to assist him. He’d been dosed with something to make him more susceptible - you know what I mean, that sort of thing, but also something to make him dizzy and forgetful, probably so he wouldn’t know for sure if he’d done it or not - but luckily he found a Lan who recognized it.”

“A Lan that knows something about drugs? That’s the most implausible part of everything you’ve said so far.”

Nie Mingjue poked Wen Qing in the forehead for excess cynicism.

“Not only did he know about it, he was able to eliminate the effects while preserving evidence regarding it,” Wen Xu said, sounding begrudgingly impressed. “His testimony of A-Chao’s innocence is rather unimpeachable.”

“What did he do, run to Teacher Lan?” Wen Ning asked, eyes wide. He’d been inexplicably terrified of Lan Qiren ever since they’d met briefly at a discussion conference – apparently Lan Qiren had imparted some wise words and Wen Ning had said something stupid in response, and now he wanted to dig himself into a giant pit any time the man’s name was so much as mentioned.

“Oh no,” Wen Xu said. “That’s the best part of this story, actually. This whole thing happened in the middle of the night, a dark one with barely any moon, and you know how A-Chao is with directions –”

“Tell him something he wants is the next town to the east and he’ll immediately go to the west, south and north before he makes it.”

“He got lost,” Nie Mingjue guessed. “And ended up…where? With who?”

“Qingheng-jun.”

The entire room simultaneously buried their faces in their hands.

“He intruded on Sect Leader Lan’s seclusion,” Nie Huaisang moaned. “The seclusion that’s been going on for nearly twenty years. Because of course he did, that’s our A-Chao for you. Oh, Lan Wangji is going to kill me…”

“You’re still in contact?” Nie Mingjue asked, surprised.

“We exchange letters, it’s no big deal. Tell me more about what happened – did they actually have to get Qingheng-jun to testify?”

“Oh yes, the family made a big stink about it. They wanted to get the girl married in as a concubine or the sect to pay out; they weren’t exactly happy when all the doctors confirmed that she was still pure. They even accused the doctors of being paid off! Lan sect doctors!”

“What did you do with Wen Zhuliu?”

“He claimed he had no idea how it happened. Somehow while also implying that I was being unnecessarily overzealous in A-Chao’s defense, since there’s nothing that unusual about taking a concubine – as if everyone wouldn’t understand it as being all but an outright admission that he was a rapist! I pretended I believed that he wasn’t responsible for the whole thing - he was, of course - and told him that if something like this happened on his watch without his knowledge, he was clearly a piece of shit bodyguard that ought to be replaced.”

“I bet he liked that!”

-

“I want to learn archery,” Wen Ning said.

“You already know archery,” Nie Mingjue said, ruffling his hair. “You’re very good at archery.”

“Not in public I’m not.” Wen Ning firmed up his jaw. “I want to be good enough at archery that I can win honor for the Wen sect when the main competition is archery.”

“That won’t be until the next time we host,” Wen Xu pointed out. “Which is years from now. You’ll be sixteen – no, seventeen by then.”

“Ancient,” Nie Mingjue, who was about that age himself, said solemnly. “Doddering. Almost decrepit. The only thing worse would be if you were twenty and on your way to twenty-one –”

Wen Xu glared.

“I’m serious,” Wen Ning insisted. “Everyone else has a talent. Why not me?”

“All right, then,” Nie Mingjue said, because mentioning how good a cook of medicinal cuisine Wen Ning was would clearly not be appropriate at this juncture. Lots of boys eventually wanted to learn a martial skill, no matter where their real talents might lie. He might have even said all boys, except of course there was always Nie Huaisang to be the glaring exception to the rule. “We’ll adjust your training regime, invite some specialized tutors…”

Wen Ning was shaking his head. “I want to go to the Jiang sect.”

“What?”

“They always win, don’t they? Maybe they lose out on first place to the Lan sect, with their arm strength, or by some fluke to someone else, but if they have a strong contestant, they win, and even when they don’t win they always place. It’s the best place to go learn.” He shrugged. “Anyway, it’s not like I’m going to get invited to the Cloud Recesses.”

Nie Mingjue had half a dozens protests on his lips, and they all died at once. It was true. Wen Ning would not be invited to study at Gusu, possessing neither an exceptional talent for some facet of learning nor a family willing to push him in. Nie Huaisang would go without question on the basis of Lan Qiren’s former friendship with their father, assuming Wen Ruohan would allow it, and Wen Qing, only interested in the study of medicine, had recently started corresponding with various medicine halls and could maybe get an internship somewhere. She’d been talking recently about Lanling, and though he’d objected to that on the basis of Jin Guangshan, the whole world would welcome a promising doctor.

Only Wen Ning would be trapped here, in the Nightless City.

(With Nie Mingjue, who could not leave, because he wasn’t broken enough yet. Who might not ever be, might live and die without ever being allowed out any further than a closely supervised night hunt, like a bird in a cage.)

Nie Mingjue didn’t especially like the idea of staying here in the Nightless City alone, but his own interests had never been as important as those he could protect. Unlike him, Wen Ning had a future, a life of his own, to look forward to, and so Nie Mingjue looked at Wen Xu. “Do you think…?”

Wen Xu made a face. “I’m not sure,” he said, frowning at Wen Ning in a way that Nie Mingjue knew meant something to Qishan Wen minds because of the way that Wen Ning ducked his head in embarrassment. “They don’t normally take outside students the way that the Lan sect does. I guess we could ask, though, using the way the Lan sect blew up as a cover.”

“They’re readjusting,” Nie Mingjue corrected, trying to be diplomatic. “Qingheng-jun was in seclusion for such a long time – it’s a big change for them for him to come out. For his sons, especially.”

He wished that he could write to Lan Xichen. Not because he had something intelligent to say about it, but more so that he could listen to all the emotions Lan Xichen was undoubtedly trying to suppress – Nie Mingjue couldn’t imagine how he must be feeling. His father, locked away for so long so as to be little more than a myth, suddenly and abruptly brought back to life –

Perhaps it was better that they didn’t write. Given what had happened to Nie Mingjue’s own father, Lan Xichen would probably refrain from saying anything at all.

“In other words, they blew up,” Wen Xu said dryly. “I’ll write to the Jiang sect and make some inquiries, not naming any names. If we get their approval, we can figure out how best to petition Father. He’ll like that angle, though; winning honor…Huaisang came up with that, did he?”

Nie Mingjue was going to protest, but Wen Ning nodded.

“I figured. We’re still going to adjust your schedule, start getting you ready – we need to make it believable.”

“Why does it have to be believable if it’s true?” Nie Mingjue asked, looking from one to the other. “Why would A-Ning do something if he doesn’t want to do it?”

“I do want to do it!” Wen Ning exclaimed, his little face red but determined. “I want to do it really badly, Mingjue-ge. Really.”

“All right, then,” Nie Mingjue said, convinced despite his suspicion that they were up to something – but then, they were always up to something, and he was usually not included.

For very good reason, and at his own request.

“All right,” he said again. “If you want it, then we’ll find a way.”

-

“Tell me everything you know,” Wen Ruohan murmured. “And it can stop.”

For today, he meant. A fool’s promise, false gold, worthless – meaning nothing.

Nie Mingjue talked anyway.

-

Wen Chao arrived home from the Cloud Recesses, to everyone’s joy, and even managed, with some hurrying, to make it back a week before Wen Ning was scheduled to set out.

“I brought wine for everyone!” he announced.

“You did not,” Nie Mingjue said sternly, though he wasn’t quite able to stop himself from smiling.

“Okay, okay, I got gifts for everyone. But I also brought wine, if you want some – it’s called Emperor’s Smile, you’ll like it –”

“Forget the wine,” Nie Mingjue said. “You’ve grown!”

He had – at least half a hand’s worth, and his face was starting to show the curves of adulthood, despite the considerable baby fat remaining.  

“I’ve grown?” Wen Chao laughed. “Look who’s talking!”

Everyone laughed, even Nie Mingjue, who ducked his head – it wasn’t his fault that he kept on growing. His father had been especially tall, and his mother even more so; it was to be expected!

Admittedly, it wouldn’t hurt to start slowing down a little. Any time now.

“Yes, well, I grow any more and your father will chop me off at the ankles,” he said, shaking his head. Wen Ruohan seemed torn between pleasure at having such a hulking beast tamed at his feet – his words – and irritation that Nie Mingjue would shortly be able to look down at him. “Tell us about your studies, A-Chao. Did you make any friends?”

“Did you pass?” Nie Huaisang asked.

“Of course I passed! And I only cheated once –”

Nie Mingjue covered his eyes and groaned dramatically.

“When I go, I’m going to cheat all the time,” Nie Huaisang announced.

Nie Mingjue aimed for an even more dramatic groan.

“And you probably won’t pass even if you do,” Wen Qing put in.

Now it was Nie Huaisang’s turn to moan. “Has anyone ever told you that your tongue is as sharp and piercing as your needles, A-Qing?”

“No. You want me to demonstrate why?”

“Help! Help! Have mercy!”

[unpeumacabre]

soaring dragon dancing phoenix - 龙飞凤舞: prologue

Yunmeng is no longer home for Wei Wuxian, for he is no longer welcome. And so when he visits he can always count on Jiang Cheng descending upon his head with the full strength of heaven's fury, to chase him out. But one day when he sneaks into Yunmeng again, days go by without Jiang Cheng making an appearance. Something has happened to Wei Wuxian's prickly shi-di, something that - once they reunite - they will find is far greater than they could ever have anticipated. Accompanied also by Wei Wuxian's dear friend (?) Lan Zhan and a Lan Xichen who has only just reluctantly left isolation, the four of them set out on a journey that will bring them across the greater part of China to the mystical Kunlun mountains of mythology - and more importantly, may bring them love, healing, and reconciliation.

If only Wei Wuxian could take his head out of his oblivious arse and start putting himself in other people's shoes for once...

Rating: Mature

Relationships: Wangxian, Xicheng, Wei Wuxian & Jiang Cheng

Read on AO3 (bc tumblr might mess up the formatting + more extensive author’s notes on the story)

Count: 1.5k

next ->

One year after the events of the Guanyin Temple, and the death of former Chief Cultivator Lianfang-zun.

Lan Zhan!

I agree with what you said about Sect Leader Yao, that old fart. He wouldn’t know a good idea if it bit him on the arse. If I were you I’d have snuck into his room at night and shaved off his eyebrows – but then again, you’re Chief Cultivator, and you have to follow boring things like rules and protocol. Don’t worry, the next time I’m in Pingyang I’ll … It’s a secret! Look forward to the next time you have a discussion conference with that pig-headed old fool.

I’ve finally reached Yunmeng. Little Apple took such a long time to get started from the inn in Jiangling. I think he had a crush on one of the serving girls, to be honest. Even apples didn’t work to drag him away from her. I had to conjure a mirage of her all the way from Jiangling to Yunmeng to get him going – can you imagine that? One of these days I’ll have to find a nice little female ass to keep his little Little Apple happy … Hahaha! I can practically see you rolling your eyes at me now, Lan Zhan. You still can’t take a dirty joke after all.

Anyway, I digress. It’s nice to be back in Yunmeng and be able to pick all the lotus pods I want and to flirt with all the pretty Yunmeng girls, although none of them are as pretty as you are, of course. You’d make a big stir if you came to Yunmeng – you should visit with me one of these days when you’re free! Although I know of course you have responsibilities as Chief Cultivator etc etc but I promise you it’ll be fun! One of these days I’ll come kidnap you. Then Lan Qiren, that old man, would really have an aneurysm, ha! I’d kidnap you just to see his reaction.

Don’t worry about me, I’m talking nonsense as usual. I wouldn’t really kidnap you, unless I was really bored. And Jiang Cheng would probably beat my ass for trying. Honestly, it surprises me that I haven’t had the honour of Jiang Cheng’s company yet. Somehow, he always knows the moment I step into Yunmeng – it’s like he has a spell set up to go off whenever I’m in the vicinity??? And he never fails to turns up for an hour or two just to shout at me, thrash Zidian around a bit and tell me to go back to Gusu. Then he storms off somewhere to drink tea or something. I swear he’s going to die of high blood pressure one of these days.

Well, I expect I’ll see him around. He’s bound to turn up sometime or other. Looking forward to your reply, and counting every one of your twenty words,

Wei Wuxian

***

Lan Zhan!

Thank you for expressing your concern for Little Apple’s wellbeing. He’s eating well (as usual) and living happily in the city stables where I left him. He has a new crush on the stable boy though, but I’m not worried about that – it seems like his affections are as transient as floating smoke and passing clouds. He seems to be like his former master in the sense of being indiscriminate with regards to his choice of partner, which makes me wonder why he’s taken such an intense aversion to me. I guess it’s just the same old story with me and animals all over again.

It’s my third day in Yunmeng, and still no sign of Jiang Cheng anywhere. Perhaps he’s simply busy with some night hunt or other and can’t be bothered to whip my ass into shape. I’ve been visiting his favourite haunts the past few days but no luck – it seems like he’s really busy this time. I’m starting to worry, and although I never thought I’d ever say this, I miss his grumpy ass. It’s been the longest I’ve gone without hearing him call me a fucking idiot, haha!

Anyway I have a funny story to tell! Yesterday I went to investigate rumours of walking corpses at the base of Yunmeng Mountain. Apparently some farmers came across them and ran away but one of them was caught and eaten.

But guess what, Lan Zhan? Actually, it was nothing more than a group of hermits who’d come down from Yunmeng Mountain five days ago after meditating in seclusion for three years, and they were doing their Bagua ritual circle walk around one of the dove trees at the base of the mountain. They hadn’t bathed once in those three years, and so when the farmers came upon them and saw them chanting and moaning and pacing around the tree they were mistaken for walking corpses! Hahahaha how ridiculous is that??? Anyway I cleared up the misunderstanding. The farmer who was apparently eaten fell down a cliff when he was trying to escape from the “corpses” and broke his leg, so the hermits rescued him and patched him up. He was perfectly fine. I talked to them and they seemed like a pretty normal bunch to me – they were quite a big group when they came down the mountain at first apparently but then most of them decided to go down south and back home instead of lingering in Yunmeng. That’s about all the excitement I’ve had so far, I think.

Well, anyway, thank you for the twenty-one words you used in your reply. You have gotten quite adept at teasing me, haven’t you? Looking forward to how else you may surprise me next,

Wei Wuxian

***

Lan Zhan,

No, I don’t think Jiang Cheng fell off a cliff too. As much as you might wish for it to happen, he’s still my brother an important sect leader, you know! Anyway I already checked all the cliffs around the mountain before I received your letter so it couldn’t possibly be so.

Besides, I went to Lotus Pier earlier today – just to check on how things are going, you know, in case they need my help or something, nothing to do with Jiang Cheng. I just stayed outside the gates because I thought Jiang Cheng would probably descend from the heavens on a cloud and break my legs the moment I stepped foot into Lotus Pier, but some of the disciples spotted me and asked me what I was doing there. They said there have been people disappearing just outside Yunmeng, to the southwest and twenty li outside the main city, and when some of the Yunmeng Jiang cultivators went to investigate a few days ago some of them disappeared. So Jiang Cheng decided to take a few more of the Yunmeng Jiang disciples and investigate himself.

Since I have some free time, I’ve decided to help them out. They’ve been gone for four days already – the beast must truly be a handful indeed. It might be fun to go and help, although I think Jiang Cheng might spontaneously explode when he sees my face. Well, maybe the explosion will end up killing the monster, who knows.

It’s quite odd, though; some of the disciples who escaped even said they saw the spectre of Jin Guangyao, that wily old fox, hanging around the cave where they were attacked. Although of course that is impossible, for he is probably still trapped in Nie Mingjue’s coffin, fighting a battle till the end of time. Well, I guess I’ll see for myself if what they saw was true or not.

I had not known that you were capable of silk embroidery. Your skill is indeed fine – as expected of the esteemed Second Master Lan! I shall treasure your gift until the end of time. The cherry blossoms flowered today, and they made me think of you. I wonder if you still remember visiting Tanzhou with me when we were looking for the remaining pieces of the Yin metal? Was it your first time attending such a festival? You looked so surprised by the petals raining down on you then! I miss those times. 

I will write to you again tomorrow when I have rescued Jiang Cheng from the human-eating monster. I will make sure to give you a good account of his face when he sees me there to interfere with his night hunt, ha!

***

Dear Lan Wangji Hanguang-jun Mr Chief Cultivator Sir,

I am writing this letter to you because I know you to be a good friend of Wei Wuxian. Just today, I visited Lotus Pier and found that my uncle has been missing for a week, and Wei Wuxian with him for two of those days. They have apparently gone in pursuit of a human-eating monster twenty li southwest of the main city limits of Yunmeng. It must have been a fierce creature indeed to have ensnared both my uncle and Wei Wuxian

Unfortunately, as I am currently extremely and regrettably tied up in Lanling Jin sect matters, this humble person would like to humbly request for your help in locating and possibly rescuing them. Thank you.

Best regards, yours sincerely and most humbly,

Sect Leader Jin Ling, Lanling Jin sect

[drwcn]

The Shadow Beneath the Light: Complete 

Concept: Sect Master Wen Qing & her harem of Jiang heirs demonic cultivators. CQL Verse. 

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Epilogue]

--

A few years later...

“A-Kuo, one last fish and we’ll go, okay? Gan’die says we’ll have to be back before dinner; if we’re  late again, yi’fu is going to make us copy Lan Precepts whilst doing handstands -”

“Yes! Gotcha, you son of a -”

“A-Kuo.” 

Lan Jingyi laughed, reeling in the line to inspect his largest catch yet. The koi fish flopped and writhed as he pulled it out of the water, a triumphant grin on his seven year old face. 

“A-Yuan, look!” He turned to his adoptive brother, who sat on the shore with sleeves and pant-legs rolled up as he diligently cleaned the contents of the small basket filled with their afternoon’s effort. “And for the upmteenth time, call me Jingyi. I have a courtesy name now - you now - like a real cultivator.” 

Jingyi said ‘real cultivator’ like he meant ‘big boy’.   

“Right. Real cultivator.” Wen Yuan smiled. “Excellent, can the real cultivator among us bring over his large catch, so I can clean it? We can turn that one into a stew tonight, with chili peppers and pickled veggies - your favourite.” 

Spring was Wen Yuan’s favourite’s time of the year. Every spring since his adoptive fathers were officially married, they would leave behind their sects and their duties to bring him and his brother to live at their small cottage, situated in the serene forest east of Mt. Dafan.  

His family was the happiest, most relaxed when they were at the cottage. Their days were simple, filled with a quiet kind of a bliss and a soft, unassuming love. They dressed like all mountain households did, sturdy clothes of hemp and cotton dyed dark blues and browns; drank water from the well gan’die dug in the yard; and ate the food yi’fu managed to prepare. They rose with the sun, not at the strict hour of five (much to A-Kuo’s joy), and rested when their fathers said so. (Note: gan’die and yi’fu are both terms used for godfather or adoptive father) 

Boys your age need to grow, so you must get plenty of sleep. 

Wen Yuan knew they were getting spoiled as it were, and soon maybe their careless days would be coming to an end. He overheard yi’fu speaking with gan’die about sending him and A-Kuo to Cloud Recesses to study there permanently instead of just a few short summer months each year. Already, yi’fu had picked out a courtesy name for A-Kuo - Jingyi - which gan’die liked very much, but they had yet to come to an agreement for himself. 

Wen Yuan wondered what name he was to be given. He took the new catch from Jingyi, cut and cleaned it the way shushu taught him last autumn when they visited Lotus Pier for the first time. The rebuilding efforts had begun, just as Wen-gugu promised. Gan’die said soon they may even be able to get their own rooms installed. Wen-gugu had written several weeks ago stating she planned to move Nevenight’s court every autumn and winter to the Wen sect’s new secondary palace in Yiling, so that Jiang Yanli and Jiang Wanyin may be close to Lotus Pier, their ancestral home. 

Gan’die had gotten rather emotional at that, and after he read Wen Qing’s letter, he had cuddled against yi’fu for a good hour decidedly not crying. 

“Wen Qing wants their next heir to be born in Yunmeng. It’s what she promised shijie and Jiang Cheng.” Gan’die had explained to yi’fu. Wen Yuan figured that meant he was getting another cousin soon. 

Little Wen Lian, the absolute pearl in her parents eyes - all three of them - was already turning two. 

“There, finished.” He plopped the fish into the basket and wiped his hands on a cloth. “Ready to go?” 

“Yep,” Jingyi stuffed his feet back into his shoes, smoothed down his robes and cringed. “I stink.” 

“Me too. We need to bath tonight or we’ll end up going to Jinlintai smelling like fish.” Wen Yuan looped his arm through the vine straps of the basket and hauled it onto his small back. For an eight year old, he was rather strong. 

“I don’t want to go to Jinlintai. It’s a wedding, so we’ll have to get all dressed up. I hope gan’die won’t make me wear the robes Jiang-shushu sent. They’re so...extra.” 

Wen Yuan laughed at Jingyi’s obvious ire. “No, yi’fu promised you can just wear your Lan robes. Only gan’die has to wear shushu’s designs. It’s a set for three anyway. Something about being the ‘better-dressed’ 3-zun...apparently there’s both pride and money on the line.” 

Jiang Cheng always insisted the Three Demonic Grandmasters could not allow the Venerated Triad to outdo them in the wardrobe department. Everyone knew Wen Qing indulged him, plying him with yards and yards of silk and satin and damask, but maybe she should stop, because it was getting ridiculous. 

A lot has happened in the last couple of years, many changes Wen Yuan and Lan Kuo didn’t see coming. One day Wen Yuan was a simple village boy up on the mountains of Dafan and the next he was being whisked away to Nevernight and placed in a position of importance and respect. He had lost his family during the war, and Wen Qing, his aunt of distant relations, was his guardian. She loved him and cared for him, but she had others to love as well. Ultimately it was not Wen Qing with whom A-Yuan had formed an attachment. When Wei Wuxian remarried, Qishan Wen and Gusu Lan formed an alliance and a child from each clan was adopted by Yiling Laozu and Hanguang-jun. Wen Yuan was the obvious choice, but Jingyi was the unexpected. 

A-Yuan looked to the other boy and smiled. He couldn’t have asked for a better brother. 

The sun was just starting to set by the time the two of them trekked their way back to their home - a little provincial cottage tucked away in the woods. Yi’fu and gan’die had build it just for the four of them. It was a quaint little place, surrounded by a bamboo fence with a stone well in the front, a little vegetable garden in the back and enough clearing space for them to practice their forms each morning. Under the arching willow tree by the south end, yi’fu had strung up a simple wood-plank swing, something that never failed to bring a smile to gan’die’s face. 

Wen Yuan and Lan Jingyi loved this cottage. As much as Cloud Recesses was ethereal, and as much as Nevernight was magnificent, it could not measure up to this home in the woods that was theirs. 

Wei Wuxian was collecting dried laundry from the clothing line and folding them into the woven basket when he saw them. Straightening up, he huffed and called out over his shoulder, “Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, they’re back! No need to go look for them.”  

By the external hearth, Lan Wangji was chopping firewood into smaller pieces. “Good.” 

“Oi, you rascals, you were gone for so long we were starting to worry you’d fallen into the river and got washed away.” Wei Wuxian admonished them half-heartedly, already lifting their baskets to inspect their batch. “Not bad, not bad indeed. I taught you well! Your yi’fu will make a stew for dinner.” 

Lan Wangji thumped his axe onto the block, scooped up the firewood and nodded. “Mn.” 

Living away from Cloud Recesses for so many seasons, he had slowly learned to cook non-vegetarian dishes for his family, especially for Jingyi, who had quite a carnivorous appetite. They’re growing boys, so they should have plenty of fish and soy and lean meat. 

When Jiang Cheng was their age, Wei Wuxian had lamented to Lan Wangji one night, his eyes taking on a far away look, he could eat Madam Yu and Uncle Jiang out of their house and home. 

“I’ll make Jingyi’s favourite. They did very well today,” Lan Wangji gave them a little smile.  

The boys grinned, basking in their father’s approval. 

“With pickled vegetables and chili pepper?” Jingyi pleaded hopefully, glowing with anticipation. 

Wei Wuxian pinched his cheeks, “Yes, my little dirt ball. Now go wash up, you’re both filthy, dear immortals. There’s water in the basin. A-Yuan, do you know how to use the fire talisman to -”

“Yes, gan’die.” The boys dropped their baskets onto the ground and sprinted off with a little cheer. 

Wei Wuxian sighed in contentment. “Boys...hmm!” 

Lan Wangji drew him shamelessly into his arms and was pressing kisses against his neck. “Hahahahaha, Lan Zhan, that tickles! And the neighbours will talk!” 

“We don’t have neighbours.” Lan Wangji mumbled against his nape, hiding a small smirk. It was true. The nearest hut was at least a good half a mile walk from theirs. 

“But they’ll still talk! Auntie Chen gave me the smuggest grin last I was in town to pick up supplies!” Wei Wuxian protested, half indignant, half delighted.  

Well, the truth was the venerated Hanguang-jun was a shameless exhibitionist when he was in the mood. A couple weeks back, they had been high up in the mountains cultivating together through duelling. The fight lasted the better half of the day and when they were done, Lan Wangji had apparently worked up another kind of appetite and ambushed the unsuspecting Wei Wuxian, ravishing him right up against an old pine three. Not expecting anyone to catch them in the act, Wei Wuxian saw no reason to keep quiet, which was how the two of them ended up giving a group of herb-picking aunties an eyeful of their “rigorous exercise.” 

That, and Lan Wangij’s increasing habit of leaving marks high up on his neck, too high to be covered by the fold of his lapel. 

And then there were nights when they’ve sent the boys off to be looked after by one of the many people who would be more than happy to spoil them (Nie Mingjue was somehow the worst but given the way Nie Huaisang turned out, it really shouldn’t have been a surprise), Wei Wuxian would emerge from a quick bath to find Lan Wangji draped across their bed in not a stitch, beckoning him with a demure little lowering of his gaze. 

“How would the fearless Yiling Laozu like Wangji tonight.” 

Wei Wuxian nearly died on the spot that one time. 

Lan Zhan, you absolute shameless tart.

Sometimes he had to remind himself that this was the man who once walked away from Cloud Recesses to volunteer himself for Wen Qing’s harem. Wen Qing was a strong woman who worshipped Jiang Yanli and adored Jiang Wanyin, but hmm…sometimes Wei Wuxian believed that if Lan Wangji wanted to, eventually even Wen Qing would have caved. Ooh, and then they would have a real harem. 

Jiang Cheng would be so jealous. 

Wei Wuxian chuckled inwardly. He was glad though that it was just Lan Zhan, the boys and himself in this quiet little cottage. It was almost the end of spring now, which meant they’d have to return to Cloud Recesses soon for the summer. Wei Wuxian sighed, content in Lan Wangji’s arm. He leaned back into him and watched the sun fade beyond the trees. 

The whole world was golden. 

“Wei Ying.” 

“Yah?” 

“Are you happy?” 

“I am, Lan Zhan, I am.” 

~~~

Jiang Cheng opened an eye to the fading sun. He was lying on a luxurious wicker lounge chaise with silk pillows and fur paddings, taking a glorious nap under the tall blooming willow tree. 

The warm weight of a small body burrowed into his side like a puppy drew his attention away from the sky. Pressed against his chest was a round, rosy cheek, slightly wet from the drool that trickled down from a rose-petal like mouth, a sight which endeared Jiang Cheng to no end. 

Very carefully, he shifted his weight and curled his arm around the toddler. 

“Jiang-xiansheng.” A servant curtseyed and greeted him quietly. It seemed she had waited for him to come to for some time. 

He had returned at noon from a week-long night hunt excursion with a blend of Wen and Jiang disciples. Both Wen Qing and A-jie were busy tending to sect matters, so he bathed, consumed a light lunch and found rest under his favourite willow tree. He hadn’t thought he would have company, but he certainly wasn’t complaining. 

“Cui-momo,” Jiang Cheng greeted. 

The old nanny smiled and said, “Lian’er-guniang wanted to nap by her diedie.”

“Of course she did.” At three years old, his only daughter and child was absolutely a spoiled princess. “You’re free to go, Cui-momo. I’ll take her from here on.” 

The momo hesitated. “Ah -” 

“Something the matter?” 

“Ah no. Just, fu’ren sent word saying she and the sect master will be dining here tonight, and that afterwards the sect master would be staying, so perhaps it would be inconvenient for guniang to stay.” 

Even after all these years, Jiang Cheng still couldn’t manage to hide a blush. Wen Qing was never one for public displays of affections, but it was no secret how much she adored Jiang Wanyin. And Jiang Yanli too was incredibly secure in her position and belief of Wen Qing’s affection that she often created little occasions for Wen Qing and Jiang Cheng to have quality time together while she monopolized little Wen Lian.

A-Qing, don’t neglect my little brother, she’d admonish, as if Wen Qing would ever. 

You just want A-Lian to yourself. 

Yes, that is true, and I want more A-Lians, so you and A-Cheng should go make more. 

Yanli!  

Wen Qing loved him and his sister beyond reason, equal but different. With Yanli, her feelings were almost akin to a reverent kind of worship, poignant and consuming in a way that her feelings for Jiang Cheng just wasn’t. A-jie once said that Wen Qing made her feel invincible, more than the demonic arts ever did, and Jiang Cheng wasn’t sure how they could love the same person and be so different in their love. 

With Jiang Cheng, Wen Qing was soft and gentle, their affection for each other easy and sustained, like a stream of clear water melting in the spring. His favourite moments are the mornings when Wen Qing would lean out the window by their bed, letting the sun catch the shine in her loose, spilling hair, in no rush to be anywhere or do anything except enjoy the moment with him at her side. 

Jiang Cheng sighed. After Lotus Pier’s massacre, he never thought he could be so happy again. 

“It’s quite alright, Cui-momo, I’m sure A-jie will want to take Lian’er for the night.” Jiang Cheng said to the old nanny. He picked up Wen Lian in his arms, rising from his lounge chair. The child slept on, none the wiser. 

“We’ll be heading down to Lanling in three days time. Have the packages been sent to Wei Wuxian?” 

“Yes, Hanguang-jun wrote back saying the robes are all in Wei-gongzi’s measurements.” 

“Excellent.” 

As a rule, Jiang Cheng didn’t enjoy going to Lanling, mostly because he couldn’t stand to even think about Jin Guangshan’s face. But the old fucker has been dead for a couple of years now - an “unfortunate” encounter with a small bout of qi deviation and falling down stairs - and Lanling Jin has become greatly more tolerable under Jin Zixuan’s leadership. With any luck, his union with Luo Qingyang would rid their clan of the residual effect of Jin Guangshan’s bullshit all together. 

“It won’t do to let the ‘venerated triad’ win in the wardrobe department. Lan Xichen is getting far too comfortable thinking he’s the epitome of fashion. I think we ought to keep him on his toes, don’t you think so, Cui-momo?” 

“Indeed, Jiang-xiansheng, I do.” 

Jiang Cheng smirked to himself, bouncing his precious toddler softly as he made his way back inside, not a worry on his mind. 

~ FIN

[tomorrowsdrama]

2020: A Year in Thirst

In 1985, Gabriel Garcia Marquez gave the world Love in the Time of Cholera.  In 2020 (er, I guess it’s now 2021), I give to you, Thirst in the Time of Covid-19 or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Embrace the Thirst, a brief recap of all the dramas I watched in 2020 and whether such dramas made yours truly parched..  

The list contains dramas that premiered in 2020, but also dramas from previous years.  If I watched it or attempted to watch it in 2020, it’s on the list.  

EDIT: Ok, I’m going to have to do this in multiple parts because apparently I watched more dramas in 2020 than I remembered and talking about them all in one post would just be too long.

This also serves as a sort of greeting to all the people who recently followed me.  I don’t know how or why, but thank you for being interested in my thirst, and also so sorry for everything you have/will witness here!  I started this side blog last December 2019 as a place to dump all my fangirl feels and thirst with unbridled abandon and let’s just say, the thirst REALLY ramped up in 2020 during quarantine and all the political chaos/uncertainty.  The state of the world may be uncertain, but my thirst will always be a comforting constant!  LOL. If you want to thirst or fangirl/boy together, I’m all ears.

Anyway, let’s start with the drama that was partially the inspiration for this list. 

1. The Wolf

Brief Summary: Sweet hot boy raised in the wilderness/by wolves meets sweet beautiful girl and they fall in love.  Shitty evil people do shitty evil things to them to cause a misunderstanding and they are separated for years.  Sweet hot boy is given the “Sexy Bloody Tormented Killer Makeover” TM and turns into a VERY VERY BAD HOT Wolf Man after being tortured/brainwashed by an evil asshole king who “adopted” him.  Bad Hot Wolf Man reunites with sweet beautiful girl but because of third party machinations in the past, he thinks that she betrayed him so he is suuuuuuch an ass to her (while still maintaining hotness).  But even beneath the asshattery (and sexy jerky smirks), he can’t help his love for her and it’s just *chefs kiss*. The angst, the pining, the mutual sacrifice for each other, the torment of wanting to be together but not being able to be together because of external forces/circustances, oh I am getting in a tizzy just thinking about it.  I won’t reveal anymore so as not to spoil the drama, but just know the ending may destroy you.

Is she thirsty? Am I thirsty? AM I THIRSTY?  Oh honey, if you don’t know the answer to that, then you must either be new here or you haven’t been paying attention to any of my posts in the past few weeks.  Look, from the first moment the camera panned to Darren Wang’s very well-defined and tan chest and windswept hair, all semblance of shame and dignity I ever tried to feign on this tumblr was immediately thrown out the window.  The feelings that he inspired within me were purely primal.  My cavewoman ancestor from millennia ago stopped gathering food in the harsh wilderness for a brief second to transmigrate into my body and go “me want big strong man!”

I mean, below is literally our introduction to Wolf Boy.  Am I supposed to just witness this and not feel anything?  The director knew what he/she was doing.  Anybody who worked on the drama who says they didn’t intend to exploit Darren Wang’s assets is a BOLD FACED LIAR. And this isn’t even Wolf boy in his hottest form.

That would be this:

Damn, your girl needs a moment here.  When Wolf Boy turns into Bad Hot Wolf Man, wheeeeewww.  The things that came out of my mouth and the thoughts that popped up into my head.

Examples of shameless fangirl drooling can be found here: https://tomorrowsdrama.tumblr.com/post/636986055498792960/dangermousie-this-should-be-illegal-i-mean Here: https://tomorrowsdrama.tumblr.com/post/637238885944033280/dangermousie-i-am-fucking-dead-the-end-this Here: https://tomorrowsdrama.tumblr.com/post/637793196830769152/dangermousie-wolfie-acquired-a-kid-omg Here: https://tomorrowsdrama.tumblr.com/post/635272988321775616/dangermousie-i-dont-know-about-you-guys-but and here: https://tomorrowsdrama.tumblr.com/post/637621638524977152/dangermousie-hnnnnnnnngh-i-am-beginning-to-forget

Honestly, just check out The Wolf tag on @dangermousie​ tumblr and you won’t be disappointed.  Prepare to become obsessed, horny, and heartbroken.

Would I watch it minus the thirst traps? Have you ever thirsted so much that you couldn’t separate what reaction was hormonal and what was objective?  Like the guy is so hot to you that when your friends ask you what do you like about him, the first 10 things you can think of are “he’s hot!” and then you try to remind yourself that you’re not a shallow person who actually cares about things other than looks but at the same time you can’t for the life of you think of a non-hot based trait that you like about the guy  Yeah, that’s what happened here so sorry, I can’t give you an objective opinion.  It’s not that there’s nothing objectively good about The Wolf, it’s just that my judgment is too clouded by Darren Wang’s abs and big hands.  But from what I can tell by other people’s posts, even if you didn’t thirst for Darren Wang (Are you made of stone?  But also, can you please teach me your magic so I can go back to being a semi-functional working woman?), The Wolf is still a very enjoyable drama with its own non-Darren Wang related merits.

2. My Beautiful Bride

Brief Summary: A drama about a strait-laced banker who wears a dorky backpack and rides a bicycle everywhere while wearing the dorkiest looking helmet ever and his beautiful bride-to-be whom he is hopelessly devoted to.  This being a kdrama, and an OCN drama at that, things aren’t all what they appear to be.  Yes, you read that right, an OCN. ROMANCE. DRAMA.  Turns out the beautiful bride-to-be has a dangerous past that soon comes back to haunt her and she mysteriously disappears one day from strait-laced banker’s life in the typical kdrama way to protect him.  Part of the reason she leaves him is also because she doesn’t want him to know about her past because she doesn’t think she’s good enough for him.  Little does she know, he knows everything about her past and accepts it all.  The only reason why he doesn’t bring it up is because he knows she doesn’t want him to know about that part of herself and he loves her so much he’s willing to do anything to make her happy.  But also, another thing she doesn’t know is that underneath that boring but perfectly ironed suit, is a finely chiseled, super efficient fighting machine who did his mandatory military service in the special forces.  He is like the terminator meets Liam Neeson’s character in Taken.  He has a very particular set of skills and will stop at nothing to get his bride back.

Is she thirsty?  Please just watch this video and you will have your answer: https://youtu.be/Ut9MhxWadHM

Prior to The Wolf, My Beautiful Bride was probably the most thirst-inducing drama I watched in 2020.

I mean, just look

at this

at all of this

I don’t’ know how Joo Young saw that body and never questioned whether he really was just a banker.  The writers of the drama must be super heterosexual men who are blind because so many of the characters in the drama question why someone as beautiful as Joo Young would ever want to be with someone like the banker. Um..Um...aside from the fact that he is financially well off, treats her well, is loving and respectful of her, and prioritizes her over everything else, JUST LOOK AT HIM.  I was so thirsty for Kim Mu Yeol in this role that I would accidentally tag this drama as My Beautiful Banker sometimes.  The banker was on a relentless one-man mission to take back his bride and turn me on in the process and ooooooh boy was he successful on both fronts.  He is seriously sex on legs every time he beats up a baddie in his quest to find answers about Joo Young’s whereabouts.

Would I watch it minus the thirst traps?  I binged the first six episodes of this drama in one afternoon partly because of my thirst, but also partly because it’s a very well made crime-action-gangster drama.  This is an OCN drama so you can expect a competently made production with well choreographed/bloody action scenes and a solid script.

3. Scarlet Heart Ryeo / Moon Lovers

Brief Summary: IU plays Hae Soo, a modern woman who is somehow transported back in time to the Goryeo period.  There, she gets entangled with a group of royal princes.  Her two main love interests are Wang So (played by Lee Jun Ki) and Wang Wook (played by Kang Ha Neul).  The princes vie for the throne and some of them for Hae Soo’s affection.  Lee Jun Ki does what he does best, which is play a sexy tortured deadly man who looks way too good with blood splattered on his face.  Kang Ha Neul is the seemingly kind prince/daddy long legs character who turns out to be not so kind or daddy long leggy.  Hae Soo is...well IU did the best she could with what she was given (which was a hot inconsistent mess).

Is she thirsty? Scarlet Heart Ryeo is like the honeypot of thirst traps.  It’s essentially a reverse harem set up with a prince for everyone.

Like them young and cute?  Then try the 10th prince, Wang Eun.

Want them big, tall, and kinda dumb?  Here’s the 14th prince Wang Jung for ya.

Want an evil bastard with an affinity for guyliner?  Try out 3rd prince Wang Yo.

Tall, slender, and scholarly? 13th prince Baek-ah will fill your needs.

Is a kind/gentle man who will ultimately disappoint you because he doesn’t show up when you need him most more your speed?  Well, let me introduce you to 8th prince, Wang Wook.

Kinda scary but oh so hot and with a ton of baggage?  We’re talking, I overpacked and brought 10 overstuffed large suitcases levels of baggage. 4th prince Wang So is the guy for you.

And if you prefer someone with no personality, presence, or memorable traits, I got a two-for-one deal for you in the crown prince Wang Mu and 9th prince Wang Won.

Would I watch it minus the thirst traps?  There is political intrigue, scheming, romance, fluffy hijinks (my least favorite parts of the drama), angst, beautiful costumes, and pretty decent fight scenes.  Scarlet Heart Ryeo is a pretty solid fusion/fantasy sageuk mostly thanks to Lee Jun Ki.  The only person who has ever carried a larger load on his back is Atlas.  I’m not saying all the other actors are horrendous. It’s just very clear that the one elevating the material beyond the inconsistencies/messiness/elementary politics of the script is Lee Jun Ki.  Your enjoyment level of the drama will likely increase if you are a fan of any of the main actors.  

[chalkrevelations]

And finally, here we are, Episode 36 of Word of Honor, and I have some FEELINGS. Let me show you them.

There also will be Episode 37 here, btw, because I’m not gonna do a separate reaction for a three-minute episode, no matter how grateful I am that we got it.

(Spoilers, so if that’s not what you want right now, scroll on by and come back after you’ve watched it. Them.)

Let’s get to the meat of the episode right away: THE HAIRPIN. And Wen Kexing knowing Zhou Zishu would have it, because he’d definitely take it with him if he was going on a suicide mission! Y’all. I really have to yell about this for a minute: That’s how secure WKX has become in his knowledge of what he means to ZZS! After all that time angsting and hiding the truth of his identity and worrying that he’s not worthy of ZZS and that he’d be rejected if ZZS knew the truth about him! But now, WKX has finally reached a point where he understands and knows (zhiji, the one I know) he’s so important to ZZS that ZZS would never ever go off to die without taking his most precious possession, the hairpin that his husband gave him! I can’t. My heart. This is like a declaration, after all that time saying they were zhiji, that WKX finally is able to truly see ZZS as that, to know him in his bones, and all of this is also delivered in the middle of WKX in a strop, irritably chastising his husband as an evil brat for running away from home to get himself killed, with Gong Jun’s little  >:(  face in full effect, and I am so filled with love for this show and this couple at this point that I have to pause Youtube just so I can roll around on the sofa, clutching at my chest and scaring the cats with my inarticulate noises. This is so good, y’all. It’s everything I’ve ever wanted. Also, now you know how it feels, WKX, you asshole. Which I suppose is why you even confess that it will would be more painful for the one who survives when if the other dies. And you were prepared to do that to him a second time? I cannot believe you, you asshole. You get to sleep on the ice couch for a month.

And then there’s some Six Cultivation Power mind-melding and what looks to be an INCREDIBLY STUPID and HEARTBREAKING ending that would leave us Burying One of Our Gays, so it’s a good thing Episode 37 (all three minutes of it) exists. It would be nice, though, if the connective tissue from 36 to 37 made any sense. Or existed whatsoever. Just, like, throw me a bone, here, show. Some kind of explicit hand-waviness that actually gets mentioned for why Ye Baiyi apparently was not as smart as he thought he was and didn’t really know what he was talking about when he was doomsaying about how one of the pair will surely, oh surely perish. None of this “Sooooo, they managed to figure out the technique and master it?” from some random shidi who never actually gets an answer. I mean, the door was left open for fanwankery on this one, with what looks to be a very last-minute conceit of all this being a story told by grown-up Chengling to his disciples, which begs the question of how much of what he’s telling them is totally accurate, given any number of issues, including the spottiness of human recall, the possibility (based on the fact they’re still on the mountain in Ep 37) that Chengling never actually saw either of them again to get the full story, and the way Gao Xiaolian basically calls bs on the whole thing. But this is still a gossamer-thin thread on which to hang Ep 37. Ep 37 basically functions as reassurance because of the mere fact of its existence, because they’re clearly both alive, right there in front of your face, regardless of the other fact that it doesn’t actually make any sense, based on Ep 36. It ultimately doesn’t matter if there is no Step 2, because Step 3: Profit! is … right there. In evidence. Happening. On your screen. No matter how vaguely unsatisfying the lack of Step 2 may be.

I do feel like there’s an interesting meta thing going on here, in that the entire show has been about – let’s be honest, it was never really about the plot - queer-coding this couple in ways that supposedly fly just enough under the radar that people can handwave them as Just Good Friends and Brothers (I mean, I guess) with a Bury Your Gays tragic ending (ugh) for good measure. And Chengling is telling a story in-universe that seems to conform to some of this same formula. And yet, we all know well and good that these guys were husbands. (I mean, barring anything else, they’re a couple in the original source material, so checkmate, censorship.) So, are we supposed to carry the same assurance out of the show, on a meta level, that what appears to be happening at the end of Ep 36 - what we discover we’re learning through Chengling’s story-telling - isn’t really the truth? Just, look: While we’re getting the Good Friends and Brothers push, there’s stuff like obvious voice-over work that doesn’t match the much more queer version of what the actors actually said, which is apparently blazingly clear to any viewers who know Mandarin and can manage to lip-read. The show has literally put de-queered words into these characters’ mouths. You can’t trust what you hear. But apparently the show has also made this obvious enough that, if you’re a good enough speaker of the language the show is being told in, and you have a good enough eye, you can see what is actually going on. Are we being taught to trust our eyes more than our ears, are we being told that what we’re being told - by the end of Ep 36 on a meta level, by Ye Baiyi-through-Chengling’s-story on an in-universe level, and by what we learn about what happened from Chengling’s story, itself, also on an in-universe level - is inherently untrustworthy, but that if we “speak the language” of this show well enough, and have a good enough eye, we can decode it and see what “actually” happened and is later made explicit in Ep 37? Is Ep 37 canon? Does it matter, when “what is canon” is already so slippery on this show, where you can apparently lip-read something that’s different than what you’re hearing, and it functions as canon because of the mere fact of its existence, because it’s clearly … right there. In evidence. Happening. On your screen.

Anyway, just some thoughts on all that, which I guess is my own fanwankery work to join up the end of Ep 36 with Ep 37, which was, of course, delightful. No matter how much I might bemoan the lack of Step 2, I had a stupid, dopey grin on my face all the way through Ep 37 and might have even teared up a tiny bit at the very end. You can’t prove anything. Lemme tell you, though, it’s a good idea to have 37 on hand when you run into the brick wall of the end of 36, because while WKX’s willingness to sacrifice himself for love is theoretically great, it is not something I actually want to see come to fruition, given the pall it would cast over the entire joyous experience that the ZZS/WKX relationship is throughout the rest of the show. Sure, there’s always fic, but there’s a heaviness that hangs over the Bury Your Gays trope, and it’s retroactively ruined shows for me before. So THANK YOU, to those of you who hooked me up so I could immediately move on to Ep 37.

What else? Other things:

OK, so, first, I have to get this out of the way: Did we actually already see all of those “flashbacks” we get in the first part of the ep, during the conversation between Zhou Zishu and Jing Beiyuan, when all the political stuff is supposed to be finally falling together to give us the big picture? I would have to go back and scrummage through those eps to be sure, and I’m not going to spend time doing that (yet) when I still need to do some keysmashing about Zhou Zishu and Wen Kexing OH MY GOD, but I do feel like some of this was new information, not just stuff that I’d glossed over because it didn’t seem important at the time? If so, not on, show. I will be keeping an eye out for that on re-watch. I am, however, perfectly willing to accept – if it turns out to be true – that you utterly distracted me with the failboats-in-love storyline, to the detriment of my focus on, you know, plot or whatever. It’s happened before. (It’s one of the reasons I need to go back and watch The Untamed again, at some point.)

OMG FAKE KEY! And as ZZS points out, this has been foreshadowed for us from early on, with WKX’s fake Glazed Armors plot. :bangs table with fist: YES. This show is going to reward re-watching SO MUCH.

Duan Pengju, oh my god, this asshole. The look on his face when the Armory didn’t open was so gratifying. Also, ha. I wondered when ZZS was finally going to be done with his shit. In fact, so much gratification in this whole scene. Xie Wang’s face when he realizes WKX double-crossed him – what, did you think you were the only tricksy one in that little alliance, Xie’er? And, holy shit – I cannot believe that Xie’er actually words this as WKX failing him, taking us back around to this theme one more time again. I would maybe feel a little worse for you if you hadn’t been a hairsbreadth away from killing him before ZZS stopped you in the last ep, Xie’er. Also if you hadn’t helped get A-Xiang killed. So I think the fail in this relationship is going both ways. Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like you’re going to get the time WKX had to start untangling yourself from the ways your abuser has fucked you up and over.

It once again becomes blindingly clear why ZZS has been my ride-or-die during this whole thing: Under the grumpy, irritable, day-drinking yet somehow eminently practical exterior, he’s actually an idealistic do-gooder who just wants to make the world a better place for people and sacrifice himself for great justice. Never let it be said that I don’t have a type. Also, I mean. Zhang Zhehan’s FACE. Let’s don’t discount the power of that.

Final word: Don’t miss Ep 37. All three minutes of it. They are perhaps the most important three minutes of the entire show.

(I mean, not FINAL final word. I expect to be going back for a re-watch and posting more things, particularly on eps from before I started typing up 1000K-word reactions this first time around.)

[missfangirll]

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart)

Fandom: The Untamed Rating: General Relationship: Song Lan / Xiao Xingchen Tags: Canonical Character Death, Fix-it, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a happy ending, Pining          Chapters: 3 Summary: Song Lan has lost Xingchen twice. How will he endure after losing him a third time?

Read on AO3

This has lived in my head for a while and finally demanded attention. I am still not over Yi City and this is my attempt at a fix-it.

My eternal gratitute for @stormy-seasons who is a fantastic beta reader, and has helped and encouraged me immensely. Any remaining mistakes are mine. :)

- - - - -

Chapter 1: A road too wide

The road goes ever on and on Out from the door where it began. Now far ahead the road has gone, Let others follow it who can! Let them a journey new begin, But I at last with weary feet Will turn towards the lighted inn, My evening-rest and sleep to meet.

- J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings

When Wei Wuxian had asked him, all that time ago, what he wanted to do now that he had gained his life back, he didn't have to think much to answer.

“Roam the world with Shuanghua, fight evil alongside Xingchen.”

It was what he had always done, a comfortable routine, not that different from before. No use in dwelling on the past, he had thought then. He was used to wandering the world alone, had done so for years and years in search of Xingchen, for a chance to apologize, to make things right again. Even if the road had felt too wide at times when he walked it alone, he had been content to do what once had been their shared goal: eliminate the evil that lingered in the world. In doing that he had felt close to Xingchen, and it had given him a focus other than his grief, his guilt.

He had never been one for expressing his feelings verbally, his words at the temple a festering proof of that, but he had still clung to that fraying hope of if only: if only he found Xingchen, if only he would listen, if only he could find the words, if only.

But it was idle foolishness to ponder on things lost and words unsaid.

He had lost everything that fateful day in Yi City, had lost his life, had lost Xingchen, had watched Xue Yang succeed. Even if it had been Xingchen’s hand and blade in the end, Song Lan refused to place any blame on him. It had been Xue Yang’s devious tongue that had poisoned Xingchen’s heart, Xue Yang’s twisted mind that had driven him to such hopeless despair that he had seen no other way out than the sword that had failed him.

When the Yiling Patriarch and Hanguang-Jun had severed Xue Yang‘s hold on him, he had been grateful, of course he had, but not particularly for the existence he had been granted. It had felt daunting, to face the world again, after years of living-not-living as a puppet. But he had accepted the spirit-trapping pouch Wei Wuxian had given him with shaking hands and a quivering heart. There was no one else left to care for Xingchen, and even when Wei Wuxian had told him that the soul inside the bag was shattered, broken, he had never once wavered in his decision. Xingchen and him, they belonged to each other, no matter the form, and so, caring for him was his responsibility. He wouldn't leave him, no matter how much it hurt.

For a short while he really had thought, had hoped, that with Shuanghua and Xingchen’s soul as his companions, the world would feel less empty, less silent, but ever since he had left Yi City behind, he had felt wrong, uneasy, in the way perception shifted when thunderstorms shadowed everything in an amber hue. He felt hollowed, a part of himself left behind in a black coffin adorned with talismans.

The road seemed wider than ever before, the silence even more unbearable now. Each room was too large, each bed too empty, each meal bland. Colours lost their vibrancy, any music was reduced to dull rhythms. He felt as if the veil of Xue Yang‘s influence hadn‘t fully lifted, but since Wei Wuxian had assured him he was free, he blamed being a living corpse for his dimmed senses.

Only in a fight did he feel almost as balanced as before, Fuxue still a trusted companion. He moved with the same deadly precision he always had, his senses sharpened by adrenaline and his energy flow. (It had been a surprise that his golden core seemed almost unaffected by the whole living-dead business, but for everything else he had lost, it was a relief that this at least seemed largely intact.)

Sometimes, very rarely, he even used Shuanghua on a night hunt. Not so much for his own sake, because the image of that blade at Xingchen's throat haunted him still, but for the sword's, which seemed restless without its master. After those hunts he would tell Xingchen about it in his mind, how his sword missed him, how the world missed him. (He felt he had not earned the right to miss Xingchen, and so said nothing of himself.)

When he talked to Xingchen, wordlessly, soundlessly, every time, every conversation began the same.

I am sorry.

-☾-•-❅-

The inn wasn't that different from any other he had taken shelter in, the wooden floors dark with age, but it was clean and inexpensive. He didn't really have to sleep as much as he’d had to when he had been human, but old habits were hard to break. Food wasn't a necessity anymore either, and most days it was a strenuous task, given the state of his tongue, but he still could enjoy the texture, the smell and temperature of meals. Losing his tongue had been as horrifying as losing his eyes so long ago, but he found that, with time, he had started to adapt. Communication was difficult at times, especially when the other party couldn’t read, but he had found most people understood his combination of facial expressions and humming sounds. It wasn't perfect and sometimes led to misunderstandings, but all in all it wasn't as arduous as he had thought.

After he had secured a room for the night – with a glance at the inn-keeper, followed by a nod towards the stairs, which she understood immediately – he sat in a corner of the small dining room, staring at the bowl of rice and steamed vegetables in front of him. The air smelled heavy, of food and unwashed people, and it made his skin prickle. He stirred halfheartedly in his rice, wishing it gone so he could escape to the temporary safety of his room.

When Song Lan finds him again, Xingchen is perched atop a wobbly wooden fence, one arm looped around the post next to him. In one hand he holds a few small peaches, the other, dripping with fruit juice, he holds out to Song Lan, offering him a piece. His smile is blinding, and Song Lan feels an urge to kiss away the sticky remnants of peach juice on his lips. He mock-frowns at the offered peach, then at Xingchen. Xingchen’s smile widens and he shakes his hand a little for emphasis. “You don't even need to touch it, Zichen,” he offers, playful and lighthearted, “just try it. It’s really good!” Song Lan has to hide his smile, glaring at the other for good measure, then carefully leans down, taking the offered piece between his lips. It is really good.

The sound of a cup being slammed on a table startled Song Lan out of his reverie. The mood of the company at the next table had grown noticeably more inebriated and, with a disappointed look at his bowl, Song Lan got up to retreat to his own room. He hated to waste food, but the thought of eating in company – in this company – made his stomach turn.

Alone in his room, the door closed firmly behind him, he finally felt able to breathe again. Setting Shuanghua and Fuxue on the table, he began his evening rituals. Eventually, with his hair down and only in a thin under robe, he sat on the bed, Xingchen's spirit pouch in front of him. It was not that the pouch ever left his side during the day, but these moments, alone, vulnerable, were special to Song Lan in a way he couldn‘t describe.

Softly caressing the silky cloth, he calmed his breathing, trying to convey his thoughts to Xingchen‘s soul.

I am sorry.

That was what he had wanted to say, when he had first lost him, but by now that wasn't the only important thing anymore.

I love you.

Come back.

He wasn't sure if he wanted Xingchen to come back, like Xue Yang had intended, as a fierce corpse like Song Lan was. Xingchen was warmth, life, sunlight – Song Lan had never understood why anyone would compare him to the moon, he had never met anyone as bright and warm – and being trapped in this lifeless existence wasn't something Song Lan wished for him.

And yet.

Even if Xingchen wouldn't return to him, he could mend his soul and enter the cycle of reincarnation, could eventually be born again. (Song Lan very deliberately didn't think about what that meant for him, since he wouldn't die of old age in the foreseeable future.)

Sighing, he laid down next to the pouch, cradling it to his chest, extinguishing the candle with a flick of his wrist. He couldn‘t speak, but had made a habit of pressing the pouch softly to his throat or chest and humming softly, hoping that the vibrations would travel and that Xingchen would somehow sense them. Sometimes, he hummed a childrens‘ song or a lullaby, a faint echo from another life, other times it was just a tuneless melody, anything to make Xingchen feel less alone. Closing his eyes, he let himself drift off.

It is deep in the night when Song Lan wakes with a start. Immediately he knows what startled him: Xingchen isn't by his side anymore, but before Song Lan can begin to worry, he sees him, standing by the open window. The moonlight cascades around him in silver waves, making him look ethereal, like a spirit from another world. He is, in a way, Song Lan muses as he watches him. Xingchen has his eyes raised to the moon, the light caressing his elegant cheekbones, his fine nose, the graceful bow of his lips. With a slight movement, a stray strand of hair falls over his face and he pushes it behind his ear with an almost impatient gesture. Then, seeing Song Lan from the corner of his eye, he turns, his lips turning upwards into a soft smile. Wordlessly, he abandons his place at the windowsill and returns to the bed, lying down next to Song Lan, facing him. Still smiling, he closes his eyes, and Song Lan breathes him in.

Song Lan didn't dream. He stopped dreaming the day Shuanghua had ended his life, his nights filled with something akin to deep meditation, but not real sleep. Thus, he woke deeply disoriented, instantly missing Xingchen‘s sleepy warmth at his side, blindly reaching for him under the covers. Reality slowly dripped into his consciousness, the realisation that Xingchen wouldn't be there striking him so forcefully he gasped for air.

The pain of missing Xingchen never went away, always lingered in the back of his mind, but this was immeasurably worse: The memory had been so real, he still could smell Xingchen‘s hair oil, feel his warm touch, hear his soft sleepy breaths. Closing his eyes with a groan, Song Lan forced himself up and out of bed. He wouldn't find any more rest anyway and the only thing that could soothe his aching heart, he knew that from experience, was distraction, movement, so he went on to begin his day.

After donning his robes and putting his few belongings back into his qiankun pouch, he silently slipped down the stairs and out of the house, both swords strapped to his back. Only a pale grey shimmer at the horizon promised the coming sunrise, but the small village still lay in deep silence. Song Lan followed the unpaved road out of town.

“Maybe I should hold onto you, so you don't get lost,” Xingchen grins at him, full of mirth, and swiftly, gracefully, takes Song Lan‘s hand in his. Song Lan almost trips over his own feet, but Xingchen’s smile is so radiant, his eyes sparkling with so much joy, that every excuse why they shouldn’t be holding hands in broad daylight on a road dies on his tongue. Wordlessly, he can only stare at the man beside him and hold on.

Song Lan‘s hand clenched around the spirit bag on his belt. Squinting at the sun above him, he took a moment to orient himself. The next village was his intended destination, the rumors of the vile energy and vengeful spirits troubling it had accompanied him for days. Not much time left before sundown, he realised, and quickened his pace.

-☾-•-❅-

The village was as unassuming as he had expected: a single road, no vendors, not even an inn. When he spotted an elderly woman in a doorway, he hastened to greet her with a polite bow, tapping three fingers to his mouth to indicate he couldn’t speak. Curious, she eyed the two swords on his back.

“Are you a cultivator, Daozhang? Did you come for the ghost?“

Song Lan nodded and raised an eyebrow inquiringly.

The woman gestured to the setting sun. “It is good that you arrived in time, Daozhang.” She sighed. “We have been plagued by that one for a while, and are afraid she will find another victim tonight.“

Song Lan gestured for her to continue.

“Well, you see, on a clear night like this, her lover left her,“ the woman said bluntly, and Song Lan began to understand. It always went like this: lovers lost, friends betrayed, brothers deceived. Greed, anger, hatred, but most of all, love - turned and twisted. He sighed inwardly: those were not easily put to rest. The woman went on.

“It… She was a girl from the village. Her name was Xiao An, they were betrothed. But then he… Well, after she hanged herself in his bedroom, he left the village, but she remained in that house. We hear her crying, every night.“ She shuddered. 

“Then, last week, a young man didn't return home to his family one night. We found him the next morning, he was…“ She trailed off, a haunted expression in her eyes. Shaking her head, she said, “Forgive me, Daozhang, I cannot tell you. He was my granddaughter's beloved, and what she did to him…“ 

She turned towards Song Lan, pleading. “We beg you, Daozhang, release her spirit. We cannot give you much, but-“ 

Song Lan interrupted her with a grunt and a headshake. Then, with another raised eyebrow, he half-turned into the direction the woman had pointed to earlier, silently asking the way. 

She nodded. “It is the last house on the left side, you cannot miss it. It has been unoccupied since… Well, since then.“ With a deep inhale, she bowed to Song Lan. “Thank you, Daozhang. Your help is much appreciated.“ With a nod, the cultivator left into the direction she had indicated.

Since it had already been almost sunset when he arrived in the village, he wasted no time. As he walked towards the abandoned house, he prepared some talismans for the fight ahead.

He notices the fierce corpse behind him a heartbeat too late, too late to turn around and block its fury with Fuxue, too late to dodge the attack. Half-turned, he watches a hand descend towards his neck, unnaturally slow, as if through mud, before silver lightning strikes, cutting the offending arm off. Stunned, he watches as the white-clad figure gracefully follows the motion of the blade, using the momentum to behead the remaining corpse behind Song Lan.

“My thanks,” he pants, only to be grabbed by his sleeve and turned around with more force than strictly necessary. “Did it get you?”, Xingchen demands. “Are you hurt?” Song Lan shakes his head and Xingchen’s shoulders slump a little. Silently he steps closer and embraces Song Lan in a one-armed hug, hiding his face in the crook of the other’s neck.

Song Lan shook himself out of his thoughts. It wouldn't do to get distracted on a night hunt, he scolded himself. Shaking his head to clear it a bit, he mustered the talismans he had prepared, meticulously adjusting a few strokes. Perhaps because he was so focused on that, he realised too late that the trees around him had grown eerily quiet: no wind moved the branches, no bird sang to its mate, no insect buzzed evening songs. Instead, he heard a ghostly whisper that seemed to come from all around him. Unsheathing Fuxue, Song Lan carefully approached the deserted hut, only to stop abruptly when he heard his name.

Song Daozhang.

He couldn‘t answer, even if he had wanted to, so he cautiously stepped closer, eyes darting around to find the spirit that undoubtedly was responsible for this. His steps faltered and he stumbled, as the spirit's next words rustled in his ears.

You left him too, didn't you?

He fought to focus past the heartache and tear-blurred vision.

I didn't want to. I didn't want to. I didn't…

You left him. You left him. You left him and he died. He died, Daozhang.

He had to close his eyes for a moment. He knew this was a vengeful spirit, using his own thoughts against him, and still he was helpless against the guilt that threatened to weigh him down. Determined not to be bested, he turned around in search for the ghost, but all he could make out was that eerie whisper.

He died. He died. He died. HE DIED!

Suddenly, with a gust of energy that even smelled evil, foul and nauseating, the spirit materialised directly behind him, so close he could feel Shuanghua vibrate in warning. He whirled around and struck, only for the spirit to duck away and claw at him. He grunted with shock at a searing pain in his chest, then hurled Fuxue at the ghost‘s neck. The blade connected, and with a loud screech the figure dissolved, leaving only a cloud of dark, coiling energy behind.

Panting heavily, Song Lan dropped Fuxue – with a silent apology to the blade for such undignified treatment – and fumbled for a talisman. In its light, the black mist cleared and left only some sticky black residue in the tall grass.

With a groan, Song Lan dropped unceremoniously down into the grass next to his blade. His breathing slowly calming, he carefully took stock of himself. His robes were torn open, his chest drenched in blood from three large, ragged cuts, leading from his left shoulder down to the opposite hip. He winced and reached for the qiankun bag at his belt to find something to staunch the bleeding, and froze.    

The spirit pouch was gone.

Frantically, he scrambled to his knees, all pain forgotten in his rising panic. Sifting through the tall grass where he had stood mere minutes before, he paid no mind to the sharp blades of grass against his hands, his only focus to find it again.

There. With a wave of unmeasurable relief, he spotted the well-worn fabric and came closer to retrieve it, already silently apologising to Xingchen that he had let them be parted so easily.

But all words died when he saw the state of the pouch.

The silk was torn, gashed open like his chest, black and gaping where embroidered flowers should have been.

No. Please, no.

When Xingchen had died, Song Lan had been under the puppet master’s control, but seen all of it unfold, the heartbreak, Xue Yang‘s gleeful explanations, the agony in Xingchen‘s face when he finally put Shuanghua to his own throat. It had etched itself in his memory, and when he finally was free of the needles, he had relived this moment over and over, every time a helpless spectator. The heartbreak he had felt then, the horror, the helplessness, had almost swallowed him, and only Xingchen‘s presence in the spirit pouch had been a thin ray of hope in the darkness. 

But nothing, nothing he had felt then could be compared to the terror that now squeezed his heart with an iron fist.

The pouch was empty.

[dangermousie]

Heelo mousie! Love your blog! Do you mind recommending some of your favourite Chinese BL novels or shows?

I've seen the untamed and read it. I'm currently reading heaven's official blessing and I saw the donghua. Anything other than these two?

Awww, thank you!

Novels: I am gonna be lazy and literally copy/paste the entire danmei section of my top 10 web novels post (except MXTX’s stuff since you are already reading it.) Let me know if you need help finding any of these.

Lord Seventh - I am only partway through this so far, but it’s already on the list because it’s smart and somehow intense AND laid-back (not sure how this works, but it does) and is honestly just a really really solid and smart period novel, with the OTP a cherry on top of a narrative sundae. Plus, I love the concept of MC deciding he is not going for his supposedly fated love - he’s tried for six lifetimes, always with disaster, and he’s just plain done and tired. When he opens his life in his seventh reincarnation and sees the person he would have given up the world for, he genuinely feels nothing at all. (Spoiler - his OTP is actually a barbarian shaman this time around, thank you Lord!)

Golden Stage - my perfect comfort novel. Probably the least angsty of any danmei novel on this list (which still means plenty angsty :P) It also has a dedicated, smart OTP that is an OTP for the bulk of the book - I think you will notice that in most of the novels in this list, I go for “OTP against the world” trope - I can’t stand love triangles and the same. Anyway, Fu Shen, is a famous general whose fame is making the emperor   antsy. When he gets injured and can’t walk any more, the emperor gladly recalls him and marries him off to his most faithful court lackey, the head of sort of secret police, Yan Xiaohan. The emperor intends it both  as a check on the general and a general spite move since the two men   always clash in court whenever they meet. But not all is at is seems. They used to be  friends a long time ago, had a falling out, and one of the loveliest  parts of the novel is them finding their way to each other, but there is  also finding the middle path between their two very different  philosophies and ways of being, not to mention solving a conspiracy or  dozen, and putting a new dynasty on the throne, among other things. It always makes me think, a little, of “if Mei Changsu x Jingyan were canon.”

Sha Po Lang - if you like a lot of fantasy politics and world-building and steampunk with your novels, this one is for you. This one is VERY plot-heavy with smart, dedicated characters and a deconstruction of many traditional virtues - our protagonist Chang Geng, a long-lost son of the Emperor, is someone who wants to modernize the country but also take down the current emperor his brother for progress’ sake and the person he’s in love with is the general who saved him when he was a kid who is nominally his foster father. Anyway, the romance is mainly a garnish in this one, not even a big side dish, but the relationship between two smart, dedicated, deadly individuals with very different concepts of duty is fascinating long before it turns romantic. And if you like angst, while overall it’s not as angsty as e.g., Meatbun stuff, Chang Geng’s childhood is the stuff of nightmares and probably freaks me out more than anything else in any novel on this list, 2ha included.

To Rule In a Turbulent World (LSWW) - gay Minglan. No seriously. This is how I think of it. it’s a slice of life period novel with fascinating characters and  setting that happens to have a gay OTP, not a romance in a period  setting per se and I always prefer stories where the romance is not the only thing that is going on. It’s meticulously written and smart and deals with  character development and somehow makes daily minutia fascinating. Our   protagonist, You Miao, is the son of a fabulously wealthy merchant,   sent to the capital to make connections and study. As the story starts, he sees his friend’s  servants beating someone to death, feels bad, and buys him because, as  we discover gradually and organically, You Miao may be wealthy and  occasionally immature but he is a genuinely good person. The person he buys is a barbarian from beyond the wall, named   Li Zhifeng. It’s touch and go if the man will survive but eventually he does and You Miao, who by then has to return home, gives him his papers  and lets him go. However, LZF decides to stick with You Miao instead, both  out of sense of debt for YM saving his life and because he genuinely  likes him (and yet, there is no instalove on either of their parts, their bodies have fun a lot quicker than their souls.) Anyway, the two  take up farming, get involved in  the imperial exams and it’s the life of prosperity and peace, until an invasion happens and things go rapidly to hell. This is so nuanced, so smart (smart people in this actually ARE!) and has secondary characters who are just as complex as the mains (for example, I ended up adoring YM’s friend, the one who starts the plot by almost beating LZF to death for no reason) because the novel never forgets that few people are all villain. There is a lovely character arc or two - watching YM grow up and LZF thaw - there is the fact that You Miao is a unicorn in web novels being laid back and calm. This whole thing is a masterpiece.

Stains of Filth (Yuwu) - want the emotional hit of 2ha but want to read something half its length? Well, the author of 2ha is here to eviscerate you in a shorter amount of time. This has the beautiful world-building, plot twists that all make sense and, at the center of it all, an intense and all-consuming and gloriously painful relationship between two generals - one aristocratic loner Mo Xi, and the other gregarious former slave general Gu Mang. Once they were best friends and lovers, but when the novel starts, Gu Mang has long turned traitor and went to serve the enemy kingdom and has now been returned and Mo Xi, who now commands the remnants of his slave army, has to cope with the fact that he has never been able to get over the man who stabbed him through the heart. Literally. This novel has a gorgeously looping structure, with flashbacks interwoven into present storyline. There is so much love and longing and sacrifice in this that I am tearing up a bit just thinking of it. If you don’t love Mo Xi and Gu Mang, separately and together, by the end of it, you have no soul.

The Dumb Husky and His White Cat Shizun (2ha/erha) - if you’ve been following my tumblr for more than a hot second, you know my obsession with this novel. Honestly, even if I were to make a list of my top 10 novels of any kind, not just webnovels, this would be on the list. It has everything I want - a complicated, intricate plot with an insane amount of plot twists, all of which are both unexpected and make total sense, a rich and large cast of characters, a truly epic OTP that makes me bawl, emotional intensity that sometimes maxes even me out and so much character nuance and growth. Also, Moran is my favorite web novel character ever, hands down.

Anyway, the plot (or at least the way it first appears) is that the evil emperor of the cultivation world, Taxian Jun, kills himself at 32 and wakes up in the body of his 16 year old self, birth name Moran. Excited to get a redo, Moran wants to save his supposed true love Shimei, whose death the last go-around pushed him towards evil. He also wants to avoid entanglement with Chu Wanning, his shizun and sworn enemy in past life. And that’s all you are best off knowing, trust me. The only hint I am going to give is oooh boy the mother of all unreliable narrators has arrived!

The novel starts light and funny on boil the frog principle - if someone told me I would be full bawling multiple times with this novel, I’d have thought they were insane, but i swear my eyes hurt by the end of it. I started out being amused and/or disliking the mains and by the end I would die for either of them.

The Wife is First - OK, this one did not make my top 10 web novels but it’s a sweet, fun gay cottagecore fest. Our ML, a royal prince, and his spouse, a smart if delicate aristocrat, keep house, eat noodles, play with their pet tiger, make out and spoil each other rotten, while occasionally fighting battles and outwitting their court enemies. It’s so very mellow. That couple redefines low drama - they are both nice and functional and use their brains. It’s as if a nice jock and a nice nerd got together and then proceeded to be wholesome all over the place.

I mean, the set up could be dramatic - our ML the prince, lost his fight for the throne and is about to be killed. The only person who stayed loyal to him is his arranged husband the aristocrat guy who ML never treated nicely since he resented marrying him (marrying a man in that world is done to remove someone from the ability to inherit the throne.) And yet the husband stood by him not out of love but beliefs in loyalty blah blah. Anyway, he transmigrates back into the past right after their wedding night and is all “I got a second chance OMG! I don’t want the throne what is even the point? I want to live a good long life and treat the only person who stood by me really well!” And he proceeds to do so to the shock of the aristocrat who had a very unpleasant wedding night and generally can tell the man he just married would rather eat nails than be married to him. But soon enough (no seriously, it’s not many chapters at all) he believes the prince is sincere blah blah and then  they get together and they pretty much become cottagecore goals.

In terms of dramas, I only do period dramas (or novels) so I am not the person to be able to recommend any modern BLs. There is a flood of upcoming (hopefully) period BL dramas but it’s relatively thin on the ground now. The two I will recommend is Word of Honor (which is AMAZING) and Winter Begonia (which I just started watching but which owns me already.) I have a tag for both - the one for the former is huge and I cannot recommend either strongly enough. I’ve heard good things about The Sleuth of the Ming Dynasty, but I am not big on mysteries so haven’t watched it for myself.

In terms of the upcoming BLs, the ones I am most looking forward to are Immortality and Winner Is King, but The Society of the Four Leaves also looks promising.

[bloody-bee-tea]

Don’t stop being rude

Me: I don’t know what to write.

@chilassa: Write about dehydration

Me: Oh, I guess I can do that in under 1k

Also me, but 2.5k later: 🤡 🤡 🤡

Jiang Cheng is just about to retire to bed when someone knocks at his door.

Usually his fight instinct would kick in immediately because if someone knocks at his door at this time of night, then that means trouble. But he is in the Cloud Recesses for some Sect business and so he doesn’t worry as much.

He still worries, because it’s long past the Lan’s bedtime and his disciples know better than to disturb him for nothing, but he is able to keep it mostly in check and not storm out with Sandu already unsheathed in his hand.

Instead, he walks up to the door in a very controlled manner.

“What?” he barks as soon as he opens it and then frowns when he sees one of Jin Ling’s friends on the other side.

Not Wei Wuxian’s kid, but the loud-mouthed one. Lan Jingyi, if Jiang Cheng remembers correctly.

He’s wringing his hands in front of his body and he’s barely meeting Jiang Cheng’s eyes, so he misses the truly spectacular roll of his eyes.

“What?” Jiang Cheng asks again, a little bit softer this time, because the boy already seems stressed enough.

“My apologies for disturbing you, Sandu Shengshou,” Lan Jingyi starts and Jiang Cheng cuts him off immediately.

“Stop that,” he orders him. “Just say what it is you want to say, no need for formalities. I’m guessing it must be serious if you’re still up and out at this hour.”

“Oh gods, please don’t tell Teacher Lan I’m still up, he’s going to punish me,” Lan Jingyi rushes out and Jiang Cheng has to bite back a smile.

Seems like Lan Qiren is still instilling the fear of punishment into every unsuspecting student.

“Alright, I won’t,” Jiang Cheng reassures him, because Lan Jingyi seems worried out of his mind, going by how his eyes keep darting around. “Tell me what’s going on.”

“So, I know I shouldn’t bother you with this, but Hanguang-Jun and Master Wei are better not disturbed at this hour,” Lan Jingyi says and Jiang Cheng doesn’t even want to know what the poor kid has seen.

“And what is this?” Jiang Cheng asks, much more patient than he actually feels.

“It’s Zewu-Jun,” Lan Jingyi says and Jiang Cheng frowns.

“Isn’t he still in seclusion?” he wants to know, because Jiang Cheng has been in the Cloud Recesses for a few days now and he didn’t see even a single hair of Zewu-Jun.

He only dealt with Lan Wangji or Lan Qiren and naturally assumed that Lan Xichen is still recovering in seclusion.

“Partial-seclusion,” Lan Jingyi gives back and only elaborates when Jiang Cheng raises an eyebrow at him in question. “It means he’s technically Sect Leader again, and deals with all the paperwork and decisions that come with it, but he isn’t meeting people. He leaves the Hanshi every now and then, but mostly to speak or spend time with family. And to visit the rabbits.”

The rabbits, of course. Jiang Cheng will never understand how the rabbits managed to worm their way into Lan Qiren’s heart, so that he would allow the pets to stay. But then again, they are very fluffy and cute.

“What’s wrong with him?” Jiang Cheng asks, shaking every thought of the adorable rodents off.

“He’s taking on too much today,” Lan Jingyi whispers. “I’m in charge of bringing him food and preparing the tea for him, but he didn’t consume either today. I’m really worried. He’s not in the best health after what happened at the temple and I’m afraid he’ll only get worse if he doesn’t eat or drink anything.”

Jiang Cheng clicks his tongue because how can a grown-ass man neglect himself like that, but then he sighs.

He wasn’t much better for many years after he became Sect Leader after all, so maybe he shouldn’t judge too harshly.

“Alright. I guess you want me to talk some sense into him?”

“If it wouldn’t be too much of a bother,” Lan Jingyi says with a deep bow and Jiang Cheng nudges him.

“Stop that already,” he grumbles, but motions for Lan Jingyi to lead the way anyway.

“Thank you,” he whispers and Jiang Cheng can tell that he is really worried about Lan Xichen.

“You two seem close,” Jiang Cheng says as he follows Lan Jingyi down the paths to the Hanshi and Lan Jingyi shrugs.

“He’s my distant cousin, but he always put in a good word with Teacher Lan for me when he was about to punish me again. He’s the only father figure I know.”

“I see,” Jiang Cheng says and then falls quiet.

A lot of orphans came out of the war, and while most of them where somehow adopted into the Sects it’s kind of unusual to give one of them more attention than the others, even if he is distant family.

Jiang Cheng guesses he and Lan Xichen have much more in common than he thought, soft spots for kids included.

“The Hanshi,” Lan Jingyi suddenly says, effectively jolting Jiang Cheng out of his thoughts, and bowing again. “Please talk some sense into him.”

“Oh, that I will,” Jiang Cheng promises and when a tiny spark of fear enters Lan Jingyi’s eyes, he gives him his sweetest smile before he walks off.

“Oh gods, what have I done,” he hears Lan Jingyi mutter behind him, but he doesn’t try to stop him.

Clever boy.

Jiang Cheng doesn’t bother with knocking at the door; he simply marches in. Politeness is for people who are not dumbasses, so Lan Xichen is disqualified.

Jiang Cheng finds Lan Xichen bowed over some letters, reading in candlelight and Jiang Cheng knows from experience that this is neither good for his back nor for his eyes.

“What the fuck are you doing?” he snaps out, when it becomes apparent that Lan Xichen didn’t even notice him enter.

Lan Xichen startles badly enough to almost send the letter flying and Jiang Cheng has no qualms laughing at him.

“How did you get in here?” Lan Xichen demands to know once he got his bearings back and Jiang Cheng motions towards the door.

“I’m in seclusion!”

“Partial-seclusion, a little birdy told me. I would think you’d make time for a fellow Sect Leader,” Jiang Cheng gives back as he walks over to Lan Xichen.

“Lan Jingyi,” Lan Xichen breathes out. “That boy makes so much trouble.”

“He’s worried,” Jiang Cheng chimes in, and Lan Xichen turns big eyes on him.

“Why would he be worried?”

“I don’t know, you tell me,” Jiang Cheng says with a very pointed look at the untouched dishes of breakfast, lunch and dinner.

“Oh,” Lan Xichen weakly says. “Is it already that late?”

“Long past your bedtime,” Jiang Cheng agrees and nudges a bowl of congee closer to Lan Xichen.

It won’t be as good anymore, even if he reheats it, but Lan Xichen needs to eat at least something.

“I’m not hungry,” Lan Xichen dismissively says and turns back to the letter in his hand.

“Absolutely not,” Jiang Cheng hisses and snatches the letter right out of Lan Xichen’s hand. “You’re going to eat and drink something and then you’re going to bed.”

“You can’t just order me around,” Lan Xichen says, though he doesn’t seem angry enough for Jiang Cheng’s liking. “I’m a fellow Sect Leader, you owe me respect.”

“Fellow is right,” Jiang Cheng gives back, totally uncaring of how Lan Xichen tries to take the letter back out of his hands. “You owe me just as much respect, but you don’t see me standing on ceremony here. Let’s just agree that between two Sect Leaders we’re also just two humans, alright?” Jiang Cheng wants to know and he only looks up when Lan Xichen doesn’t say anything to that.

“What?” he gruffly asks when Lan Xichen’s stare becomes unbearable for Jiang Cheng.

“You’re being rude,” Lan Xichen whispers and Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes.

“And you’re being dumb,” he shoots back, but Lan Xichen shakes his head.

“No, I mean—so far everyone has treated me with kid gloves or the utmost respect. There’s no in between.”

“And that really sucks, doesn’t it?” Jiang Cheng asks, not at all surprised when Lan Xichen nods.

“It grates, after a while,” Lan Xichen mutters and understanding finally dawns on Jiang Cheng.

“Is that why you’re slaving away over this paperwork? To make them stop treating you with kid gloves and to feel like you deserve their respect?” he asks and when Lan Xichen flinches, he knows he hit the nail on the head.

“What do you know about this?” Lan Xichen hisses out and Jiang Cheng thinks this is the first time he has ever seen Lan Xichen being visibly angry.

“A lot more than I would like,” Jiang Cheng admits and then sighs as he puts the letter down on the table. “It’s easier to throw yourself into work than to think about why they would act like you could shatter at any moment,” he says, very deliberately not looking at Lan Xichen. “So you work and work and work, until eventually that becomes all you do. By then everyone expects this of you, so you can’t even slow down, because then they would think you’re slacking off or breaking under the pressure. It’s not a situation you can win, once you’re in it.”

There’s a long silence after he stops speaking and then Lan Xichen very lowly asks “How did you get out of it?”

“I collapsed,” Jiang Cheng freely admits. “Too little to eat and drink, too much work. I didn’t even sleep properly and one day I simply collapsed from dehydration. My healer beat some sense into me, and my closest disciples offered to help with the workload. They practically forced me to delegate and I thank them every day for it.”

“Other people have done my work for too long,” Lan Xichen mutters and Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes.

“So they can do it a little bit longer. Give yourself some time to ease back into things. There’s no need for you to run yourself into the ground like this.”

“But,” Lan Xichen tries but when Jiang Cheng slams his hand down on the table he falls silent.

“No but,” he tells him. “You’re helping no one if you collapse or ruin your eyesight forever.”

“I practiced inedia,” Lan Xichen argues and Jiang Cheng snorts out a laugh.

“Congratulations, that doesn’t help lesson the stress you’re putting your body under.”

“You really are rude,” Lan Xichen says, but he doesn’t seem too displeased by that.

“Better than overly polite, isn’t it?” Jiang Cheng asks and nudges the bowl of congee again. “Eat,” he orders Lan Xichen, who shakes his head.

“I’m not hungry.”

More like long past the point of hunger, Jiang Cheng guesses.

“Drink, then,” he tries next and pushes the by now cold tea towards Lan Xichen. “You’ll dehydrate much quicker than you’ll starve.”

Lan Xichen doesn’t even look down at the cup but keeps his gaze on Jiang Cheng.

“What?” Jiang Cheng bites out when Lan Xichen doesn’t move to look away, and he’s startled to find a small smile on his face.

“Did anyone tell you you’re really annoying?” Lan Xichen wants to know, but his voice is soft and the smile is still playing around his mouth, so Jiang Cheng guesses he can’t be too annoyed.

“Jin Ling, ever other week,” Jiang Cheng freely admits and counts it as win when Lan Xichen huffs out a small laugh. “Drink,” Jiang Cheng orders again and this time Lan Xichen takes the cup.

He makes a face after the first sip, but dutifully drinks until it’s empty.

“Gross?” Jiang Cheng asks and Lan Xichen nods enthusiastically.

“Very,” he agrees.

“Maybe you should get up and make a new pot then,” Jiang Cheng advises him and smiles when Lan Xichen levels him with a look.

“If you want new tea, why don’t you make it?”

“Zewu-Jun, is that any way to treat an honoured guest?” Jiang Cheng asks with mock outrage and leans back more comfortably. “I think your hospitality needs some work.”

“Hospitality, my ass,” Lan Xichen grumbles under his breath, but he does get up and starts working on a new pot of tea. “You’re a menace and nothing more.”

“And I have found that works best when dealing with stubborn and stupid fellow Sect Leaders,” Jiang Cheng innocently gives back.

Lan Xichen busies himself with the tea instead of replying to that, and it’s only when he comes back to the table with the new and hot pot of tea that he speaks again.

“I’m not coming out of seclusion,” he lowly says and Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes as he takes the pot out of Lan Xichen’s hands to pour both of them a new cup.

“And I’m not asking you to. In fact, no one is asking you to before you don’t feel ready. I’m just asking you to not be a massive idiot and to take care of your own health.”

“And you couldn’t have done that in a nicer way?” Lan Xichen wants to know but he accepts the cup when Jiang Cheng offers it to him.

“Would it have worked?” Jiang Cheng shoots back and is not at all surprised when Lan Xichen shakes his head.

“And that’s why I didn’t,” Jiang Cheng says and then takes a sip from his tea, practically daring Lan Xichen to do the same.

“Are you going to bully me into self-care every day you’re here now?” Lan Xichen wants to know after he drained his cup.

“If you continue being stupid, then yes,” Jiang Cheng easily gives back and feels very accomplished when Lan Xichen chuckles at that.

“Fine. I expect you back here tomorrow then,” Lan Xichen decides. “I might be very against lunch, you see.”

“I see,” Jiang Cheng replies and mentally pats himself on the shoulder.

He’ll get Lan Xichen to take care of himself sooner or later, he’s sure of that. But he also knows he can’t stay forever, so someone else will have to take his place.

“I’m unavailable for dinner, though,” Jiang Cheng says, even though it’s not at all true. “But I think Lan Jingyi would love to bully you into eating.”

Lan Xichen huffs out a laugh at that.

“He would,” he agrees and pours himself a new cup.

It seems his thirst is hitting him hard now.

“I’ll see if he’s available,” Lan Xichen then says, and Jiang Cheng knows that even if he shouldn’t be, Lan Jingyi will make himself available.

“Good,” Jiang Cheng says and expectantly holds out his cup for Lan Xichen.

“Rude and helpless, I see,” Lan Xichen murmurs, but he dutifully pours Jiang Cheng a new cup.

“And hopefully the first one will rub off on you,” Jiang Cheng mutters. “You could stand to be a little bit more rude.”

“And you could stand to be a little bit more polite,” Lan Xichen shoots back.

“I guess we should make sure to teach the other then,” Jiang Cheng immediately says and Lan Xichen agrees with a small nod.

“I guess,” he also says and then falls silent.

Jiang Cheng guesses it will be a lot of work to make Lan Xichen even a little bit rude, but he’s more than ready to take that challenge on.

Everyone needs some rudeness in their life, after all.

{Buy me a kofi}  

[missholland]

The one(s) who never stop searching

I sometimes wonder whether Hanguang Jun grew up with a role model, is there anyone he looks up to, or that just doesn’t exist because LWJ is too busy being admired and respected by pretty much everyone else (apart from his biggest anti-fan Su She).

Of course, he adores his soulmate. BUT, now rewatching the Coffin Town arc, I just really want to write something about LWJ and his admiration for Xiao Xingchen/Song Lan.

LWJ first met XXC and SL in episode 10 when checking out Chang clan’s manor in Yue Yang with WWX and JC. The duo captured Xue Yang there, and introduced themselves to the gang.

‘Xiao Xingchen, the moon in the breeze. Song Zichen, the Gentry despite the frost. Your decency is known to us’. This was probably the longest sentence LWJ said to another human being since the beginning of the series. Even his eyes scream ‘I’m a fan’ and makes WWX turn around in surprise. 

During their later conversation as NHS and JGY arrive, XXC and SL talk about how they’re not interested in bloodlines and just cherish those with same ambitions. LWJ has obviously been listening very carefully, and even actually asks where they cultivate and how others can find them. I mean, since LWJ has not really opened up by that point, it’s truly impressive coming across new characters that manage to generate so much interest from LWJ within a very short time. Let me repeat. he even ASKS PERSONAL QUESTIONS!

His admiration becomes VERY clear just a few minutes after during the farewell scene. It’s probably only the 3rd time LWJ gives us a mellow facial expression since episode 1. He watches on as XXC and SL depart - quite a long look with a mix of emotions: appreciating, pondering, wondering, with a tiny bit of sorrow, somehow. He was clearly in his own world until WWX calls him back down to earth. He then gives his soulmate a soft look before nodding and following the gang. WWX clearly senses that LWJ has something in mind, as they walk, he turns and looks at LWJ.

This is how I interpret LWJ’s thought process in that sequence. As he looks on XXC and SL leaving, it feels like he has a bunch of ‘What if...’ questions in his head. Probably something along the line of ‘Darn, wouldn’t it be nice to just roam the world with your lifelong confidant, protect the weak, exorcise the evil without the burden of playing clan politics? What if I was not restricted by 3,500 rules at Gusu? What if I could actually live a life as in my name WangJi - to not seek fame or wealth, forget about worldly matters, and be at peace with the world?’. As soon as WWX calls him he turns around and.... ‘What if I could live that life with this person?’.

I’m convinced from this point, LWJ already has a vision in his head about going on adventures with his soulmate. We know he eventually got his dream come true from episode 34 onward, but it was a very very long and painful way for him to get there. At the end of episode 35, when filling WWX in about what happened to XXC and SL, LWJ was visibly upset which led him into having himself a drink. Some may argue that his frustration is due to people still shitting on WWX after all these years, or about the injustice related to Jin clan and Xue Yang rather than XXC and SL. I still think that being reminded of the duo’s tragic fate when talking to WWX does have some impact on LWJ’s emotion. 

It was a clear case of extreme clan-related injustice that brought so much pain to the lives of 2 people who are not even attached to any sect whatsoever, 2 people who just purely wanted to protect the world from evil while not taking side. They were simply caught up in the whole major clans corruption shamble, and clearly the last people on earth who deserved to die/gone missing because of the clans’ mess. For someone who has long admired their decency, how would that NOT frustrate LWJ - someone who’s already in a long battle against injustice that screwed over his soulmate’s life?

Fast forward to the end of the Coffin Town arc in episode 39, it’s now revealed that Xue Yang murdered everyone at Snow White Pavilion, turned SL blind and led XXC to give his eyes to SL. As LWJ was searching for WWX, elsewhere, someone else was also looking for their other half. Unfortunately, SL arrived to find XXC being deceived by Xue Yang, and basically all of them ended up with tragic fates. Once all of the misunderstanding is finally clarified, we find WangXian and the junior disciples in front of A Qing’s grave. Once again, WWX notices LWJ being miles away in his own thoughts. He looks up and stares into his soulmate’s beautifully surreal face. It has an odd sense of relief in his vision, mixed with a bit of fear - a ‘close call’ type of fear, like... ‘Something even more awful could have happened’. 

LWJ then mumbles ‘Fortunately...’ to a confused WWX and probably because of censorship, we never get to hear the end of that sentence. Putting in the context of everything that just happened to them, it’s not too difficult to work out that LWJ was acknowledging how extremely lucky he was being able to reunite with WWX safe and sound. Sadly, XXC and SL did not get that chance.

 They then returned to XXC’s coffin to find SL. LWJ looks on, apologetically, as WWX gives SL what’s left of XXC’s spiritual cognition. Just a quick side note, I cry EVERY SINGLE TIME watching SL write in the soil with this sword ‘Roam this world with Frostwork. Exorcise evil beings alongside Xingchen’. 

LWJ then looks up to SL and it feels so strongly that he wanted to say something. He’s been there - he saw his soulmate falling off the cliff. He started to invest most of his time searching for WWX, from appearing whenever chaos was to communicating with spirits asking for WWX’s whereabouts. 16 years of mourning the dead and living with the pain, feeling incomplete and empty without his counterpart. 

LWJ is the only person who can relate to SL. And that’s probably why he knows there’s nothing to be said that could ease the pain. He proceeds to respectfully present SL with XXC’s Frostwork and bow. 

LWJ, with sadness in his eyes,  watches SL walk away, this time without XXC by his side. The scene cuts to WWX thinking to himself ‘I wonder if the two of them would be able to meet each other again’. The same thought must have gone through LWJ’s mind as well. WangXian then exchange a mournful look - if only the camera has stuck around longer for us right here, as I’m sure, this could have been the ‘We should be thankful that we are still standing in front of each other’.

I really appreciate The Untamed crew setting a good 3-episode arc aside to tell the tragic story of XXC/SL/XY the best way they could. It’s also a good idea to change the timeline of certain event so that XXC and SL cross path with WangXian in WWX’s first life, as it lets us see from very early on that LWJ is not just a rigid guy to follow rules all the time. He doesn’t have all the answers to everything in his life just because he reads all the books at Gusu. He does have certain insecurity and curiosity about a different path, now that there’s someone in his life that make it worth considering. It also provides more context to the unfortunate contrary between the fates of WangXian and SongXiao.

If you’re also impressed with this arc as much as I am, I would strongly recommend checking out the novel as it tells us a lot more about SongXiao origin story and how their feud with Xue Yang started. Besides the main couple whom all of us obviously stan, this storyline definitely impressed me the most rather than anything else. I really wish one day Song Lan would succeed in nursing Xiao Xingchen’s spiritual recognition back to wholeness and they would meet again.

[trilliastra]

[Jin Ling loves his jiujiu very very much. Angst/hurt/comfort/fluff.]

-

The first thing Jin Ling sees when he arrives at the clearing is his uncle on the ground. Hanguang-jun's hand on his chest and Wei Wuxian pacing around them, shaking his head frantically.

He feels the world disappear around him and soon enough he's running, eyes fixed on his uncle's face. “Jiujiu,” he tries to reach him, to shake him awake because his uncle should not be this expressionless, he should be frowning, complaining about Hanguang-jun being too close. His uncle should not look like he's dying, “wake up! Jiujiu –” he notices Hanguang-jun is still touching him and tries to push him away, “what are you –”

“Jin Ling, calm down.” Wei Wuxian pulls him back, lookinh far too calm for this situation and Jin Ling wants to punch him.

“What happened?” He asks, desperate, notices Jingyi and Sizhui stepping closer, the other disciples standing farther away. Some from the Jiang Sect gasp and try to reach their leader as well, but are stopped by Sect Leader Lan.

“We got attacked, he hit his head against a rock.” Wei Wuxian explains and Jin Ling turns to look at him uncle again, notices the puddle of blood on the ground around his head. He feels like throwing up. “Lan Zhan is transferring energy into his core, he will be fine, Jin Ling.” Wei Wuxian tries to reassure him, but his hands are shaking just as much as Jin Ling's.

“I will do it.” Jin Ling says, determined, pushing Wei Wuxian away. The man stops him again. “Let me go.” He growls, angrily, one hand on his sword. Some disciples say he looks exactly like his jiujiu when he frowns and Jin Ling rejoices on it now, hopes Wei Wuxian feels the glare deep inside his core-less body.

“Lan Zhan is –”

“No offense,” Jin Ling says, makes sure to stare directly at Hanguang-jun’s hand touching his uncle, no doubt feeling the beat of Wei Wuxian's core inside his jiujiu's chest, “Hanguang-jun might be trying to stop him from dying, but he isn't trying to save him.” He hears someone gasp and someone else yells his name, but he doesn't turn around to check, keeps his eyes on Hanguang-jun's face when the other man looks up, only a frown between his eyebrows to indicate he heard him.

“Jin Ling,” Wei Wuxian shouts and Jin Ling finally decides to shove him away.

“I will do it.” Jin Ling repeats, keeping his stance. He knows most of them still see him as a child, hell, Jin Ling still feels like a child most of the time, but he's Sect Leader Jin now, and he knows that somewhere in Lotus Pier there's a document saying he's to be Sect Leader Jiang in case something happens.

His jiujiu has prepared him for this moment, ever since he was a child and hated hearing about the what ifs, used to cry at the thought of his uncle leaving him. He wasn't ready to be Sect Leader Jin, but he's somehow making it work. He's not ready to be Sect Leader Jiang, but – he notices the other disciples, all dressed in purple, step the tiniest bit closer, ready to protect him if necessary – he's not against abusing his power to protect the one he loves.

“Wangji,” he hears Sect Leader Lan call and Hanguang-jun looks up at his brother. They share a look, a silent conversation that Jin Ling will never understand, but in the end Hanguang-jun steps back, lets Jin Ling take his place.

Jin Ling rushes to his jiujiu's side, kneels next to him and takes a deep breath. He did this before when Fairy hurt her leg in a trap, his jiujiu showed him what to do, guided him through the steps of transferring his own energy into another body. “Until help comes.” He had said, softly, holding Jin Ling's hand against Fairy's heart.

He can do this again. For his jiujiu he would do anything.

–

Jiang Cheng knows something is wrong when he finds himself in his father's office. It burned down along with the rest of Lotus Pier, years ago, and Jiang Cheng tried to rebuild everything exactly as it was, but he could never do it with his father's office. He doesn't think he'd be able to do his job well with the ghost of his father always around him.

He's the Sect Leader now and though he doesn't think he will ever be as good as Jiang Fengmian was, he has to try to do it his own way, to follow his own path. He apologizes to him on his prayers, hopes he would understand and approve of his choices, but they are his choices to make in the end.

After his sister's death and his brother's fall, Jiang Cheng realized he could never be what his father expected him to, so instead of following the words of a ghost, he embraced his own thoughts. He's failed him anyway, there's no point trying to change who he is. “Once a failure, always a failure.” He hears a voice say, turns around to find his father looking at him, clear disappointment on his face.

Jiang Cheng sighs, lowers his head, doesn't try to argue. He doesn't know what's happening, but he remembers those same words being said to him once before.

He blinks and his father is no longer there, instead his mother appears. “You're impossible.” She says. He closes his eyes, prepared for the slap, but it never comes, instead, when he opens his eyes again, his sister is there glaring at him.

“What did you do to my son?” She asks and Jiang Cheng sinks to his knees, finally letting the tears fall.

He's gotten used to being a disappointment to his parents, but never to his sister. She was the one who always loved him, who said he's a good leader, a great man, a lovely brother. He failed her too.

“I'm sorry.” He chokes out, but she's no longer there, instead Wei Wuxian is glaring at him, face distorted and a triumphant smile.

“You killed me.” He says. “You finally did it.” His brother laughs, mockingly. “You always wanted to kill me and you waited until I was without my core to do it. If I knew, I would have never given it to you. You never deserved it.”

Then there's Wen Qing, and Lan Qiren, and then his father again, and the other leaders laughing, pointing fingers. Jin Guangyao with a knife against Jin Ling's neck, Wei Wuxian's sword on his mother's chest, ghosts and more ghosts, taunting him, mocking, laughing.

And Jin Ling – his A-Ling, his nephew and his son – watching the humiliation, finally noticing the real Jiang Cheng. A weak man who hides behind his anger, a lonely boy, a man unworthy of being loved.

A failure.

“Jiujiu,” Jin Ling says, “come back to me.”

Jiang Cheng wakes up.

–

He's in Cloud Recesses, Jiang Cheng notices when he opens his eyes, confused. Jin Ling is sleeping next to him, holding his hand tightly.

“He's exhausted.” Jiang Cheng turns and notices Wei Wuxian on his other side, looking like he hasn't slept in days. Jin Ling lets out a soft huff, then a whine and Jiang Cheng tries to hide a smile. He used to do that as a child too.

“What happened?” He asks, his head hurts and the world looks fuzzy. He touches the back of his head and feels the bandages.

“You hit your head.” Wei Wuxian answers. “Jin Ling gave you some of his energy and then passed out.”

Jiang Cheng's eyes widen. “Why would you let him –” he starts to say, but Wei Wuxian stops him with a shush, pointing at a still asleep Jin Ling. Jiang Cheng closes his mouth, immediately, glaring at him.

“I tried to stop him.” Wei Wuxian keeps saying. He smiles, fondly, as he looks at Jin Ling. “He yelled at Lan Zhan.”

Jiang Cheng is taken back by his words, looks at the boy sleeping peacefully. He's still so young. “I will break his legs.” He lies, running one hand through his nephew's hair.

“He was really worried.” Wei Wuxian says, trying to hide a laugh behind his hand.

“What?”

“Oh, Jiang Cheng,” Wei Wuxian shakes his head, fondly, “he's just like you.” Jiang Cheng knows he means it as a compliment, still can read his broth– still can read him after so many years. But it shouldn't be like this, Jin Ling deserves better than him.

Jin Ling deserves someone like Wei Wuxian.

“Stop thinking stupid things.” Wei Wuxian says, pinching Jiang Cheng's arm. It's a childish action, fitting of a childish man, but it's so familiar, so brotherly, Jiang Cheng feels his heart hurt.

Wei Wuxian pulls back quickly, staring confusedly at his hand as if it created a life of its own. “I –” he tries to say, opens his mouth once, twice, but nothing comes out. He swallows. “Jiang Cheng –”

“I know.” Jiang Cheng shakes him off, looking away. It's hard to forgive, even harder to forget, and he misses it too. The stupid fights, the banter, the hugs and the affection. He has his Clan, loves his people, but he's a leader to them, not a brother or a son. He – he just wants it back. “I –” he doesn't know how to say it, doesn't know if he can say it, but as usual, Wei Wuxian knows it all too well.

They were the Twin Prides of Yunmeng, they were inseparable.

“Yeah,” Wei Wuxian nods, reaching out for Jiang Cheng's hand. He squeezes it tightly and Jiang Cheng has to look away to avoid the tears. He never realized how much he missed this – affection.

“Jiujiu,” Jin Ling mutters, confusedly, opening his eyes, and Wei Wuxian lets go of Jiang Cheng's hand immediately, “jiujiu, you're awake!” He says, when he notices Jiang Cheng looking at him, throws his arms around his shoulders and buries his face on his neck. “You're awake...” He repeats, voice low and Jiang Cheng knows he will start crying any minute now.

“Yeah,” he touches his nephew's back, rests his head against Jin Ling's, “I heard you yelled at Hanguang-jun.”

Jin Ling sniffles, “I was trying to help you.” He says, voice wobbly.

Jiang Cheng shakes his head, amused. “You're too much like me.” He comments and feels Jin Ling nod against his neck. Truthfully, he doesn't care if Jin Ling yelled at Hanguang-jun or not, but his nephew is a Sect Leader and this kind of behavior should not be encouraged. Jin Ling might be eighteen, but Jiang Cheng will still scold him as if he was ten. “You're going to apologize, later.”

“Fine.” Jin Ling whines, still holding him.

Jiang Cheng snorts. “Are you planning on letting me go any time soon?”

“No.” Jin Ling answers, tightening his hold. “I love you, jiujiu.”

Jiang Cheng sighs, glances at Wei Wuxian still sitting on the other side of his bed, smiling happily. “I love you, A-Ling.” He whispers. When Jin Ling pulls back, he sees his sister's smile on his face and feels, for the first time, like he's done something right. “Thank you.”

–

“She would be proud of you.” Wei Wuxian tells him later, when Jin Ling has left to apologize to Hanguang-jun.

Jiang Cheng takes a deep breath. “Yeah, I think she would.” He agrees and realizes he means it.