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glowinghae · 2 years ago

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morning reblog

meet me at midnight || c.three

[Chapter Three - Only Love Can Hurt Like This]

𝐉𝐀𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐎𝐃𝐃 + OC

meet me at midnight masterlist 𝟏𝟖+, lots of various torture, trauma, angst, suffering, cheating, violent death, funerals, women not supporting women, arguments, fluff but really a lot of angst. smut [p in v, rough, fingering, etc.] all characters are over 18,

to be a vigilante requires only three things: a broken heart, the resources, and the will.

𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐒 𝐃𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓 𝟏𝟖+ 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘! an extremely fat thank you to @hllokttyairhead for being so extremely beautiful, supporting, and lovely in the making of this chapter. pls pls pls go and read her stuff because it is some of the best writing on this site.

Hazy morning light peaked through window shades. Esther Wayne was sleeping on clouds, or that’s what it felt like. Her skin was caressed in soft white linen as far as her dazed eyes could see. The warmth of the sun felt healing against her bare skin.

As her vision began to clear, it became more apparent that she was not in her safe house. Yet, Esther recognized this place. The walls were a deep grayish-blue. She knew it immediately because she had helped pick it out once upon a time.

Sitting up quickly, Esther looked around rapidly. How had she gotten here? This isn’t where she had been the night before. Suddenly, her head began to spin at a dizzying pace. Memories from the night before rushed her like a herd of angry elephants.

It couldn’t be possible what she’d seen. What she’d heard. What she’d felt. Esther reached her hand up and grazed her face; she’d felt his fingers on her cheek. On her lips.

Jason Todd was alive. At least, it seemed like he was. Maybe all last night was just a dream. But then, how did she end up here?

This was Dick Grayson’s apartment in the industrial district of Gotham. She knew because she’d helped him pick it out. There’d been a time when they were supposed to live in it together.

She didn’t see him anywhere, but Esther could smell food being cooked, which meant Dick was there.

Usually, she’d be freaking out that Dick knew where she was because that meant that Bruce would know where she was. But if Dick had told Bruce, her older brother would be here waiting to strong-arm her into being his little puppet again.

Not to mention that these sheets were the best she’d slept in so long. And the mattress was so impossibly comfortable. Her suit was folded neatly in the corner of the room, with her blood-stained mask on top.

Wait, if her suit was over there… Then what was she-? Esther lifted the covers and looked down. Someone had undressed her and put her in a pair of boxers and a t-shirt. She touched her skin, its normal post-fight grittiness nonexistent. Someone had washed her off.

Despite all these reasons to be comfortable, Esther’s head was pounding. She ran her tongue over her teeth, the faint taste of chemicals was still there.

Shit. Esther hadn’t really had a choice on how to escape Bane, but it had come with consequences. The venom Bane was so fond of wasn’t sitting well with her. She’d come in contact with it years before when she was younger, and as it turns out, she had a bit of an allergy to it.

Her stomach was churning and sure enough, when she looked at her bare thighs there were deep red splotches painted across them. Those would clear up in a few hours but the dizziness and headaches liked to stick around a bit longer.

What did any of that matter, though?

Jason. Jason. Jason was all that ran through her mind. Had it been real? Could it even be possible for it to be real? Esther had cradled his dead body in her arms and watched the bullet steal his life, youth, and future away. Her fingers had been soaked in his blood as she caressed his broken face.

Beautiful Jason. Her Red. It certainly looked like him. Sounded like him too. That permanently sarcastic voice.

Her chest swelled up with something if it had been him last night, despite how unlikely that was. Something light and warm… something she hadn’t felt in so long.

Hope.

But hope for what exactly? And why was Jason running around as Red Hood and working with criminals? There were so many questions that she didn’t understand, but it felt like she’d been holding her breath for the past year, and for once, just now, sweet blissful air filled her lungs.

Esther sighed, she couldn’t stay here all day, and she deeply considered leaving out the window. But man, whatever Dick was cooking smelled great. Rubbing at her temple, Esther threw her blotchy legs off the side of the bed and stood up, the oversized t-shirt dropping to her mid-thigh.

It still didn’t make sense to her how she ended up here last night. The last thing she remembered was Jason’s green eyes looking at her in concern.

Blood rushed to her head as she took a few steps forward and opened the door to the kitchen. Sure enough, Dick Grayson’s back was to her as he finished frying some bacon. He didn’t notice her entry because his attention was focused on the TV in the living room.

“Sources say that the Joker’s body was found this morning, hanging from the sign of Ace Chemicals. His body was reportedly mutilated and found with a sign pinned to his chest with the words ‘you’re welcome. GCPD is conducting a thorough autopsy to ensure it’s not Joker up to one of his tricks but as of right now, it could be a very Merry Christmas for Gotham City.”

Jack Ryder’s voice was cut out as Dick flicked the tv off. “So… you finally did it then,” Dick said, not looking back at her. He must have realized that she’d come out of the room while Esther was listening to the reporter.

Was last night truly real? Joker was dead. Could that mean that Jason really was alive?

“It wasn’t me,” Esther said in almost a daze. When Dick turned to face her, she noticed how tired his face was. How disappointed it was too. She rolled her eyes, “It wasn’t.”

“It’s just a coincidence then that your suit and weapons are covered in blood?” Dick’s tone wasn't annoyed exactly, more… exasperated.

There was a moment of silence as Esther grabbed a couple plates from the cupboard, knowing for a fact that Dick had made enough food for both of them. “I was there. But it wasn’t me. Someone beat me to it.”

It was nagging at her. Esther wanted to scream that Jason Todd was alive, but she couldn’t. What if it really was some trick? And everyone got their hopes up just to be let down? Somehow she doubted it was a trick. Her gut told her it was really him.

Truthfully speaking, Esther was being selfish. She just wanted to keep this to herself a little longer. Maybe figure out what was going on first.

Dick turned to look at her, searching her face for something. After a moment, he seemed to have found it. “Hm.” He believed her, “So the blood must be from all the people you killed trying to get to him.”

Well, there was no denying that. Instead, Esther looked him up and down. Over the years, Dick Grayson had not changed much. His hair was overgrown as always, and he had a sleepy look in his eyes. His Romani features had always made her heart swoon, but as Esther looked at Dick now, she felt nothing.

Nothing wasn’t precisely true. “If you disapproved so much, Bruce would be here dragging me to some rehabilitation center already.” Esther had known Dick since her first day in Wayne Manor. He’d been there before her since the death of his own parents. Dick had brought her hot chocolate on her first night, and she’d told him the bed was too soft after a lifetime of sleeping on a hospital cot. Esther smiled at the memory of him putting a pillow and blanket on the ground for an anxious little girl.

Dick threw her an uncomfortable look and Esther sighed; she had a feeling about what he was about to say. “Ok, full disclosure? Bruce is on his way here, but it’s unrelated. We’ve got about half an hour since the traffic is bad. I uh- I didn’t really expect to find you in my t-shirt in my bed this morning.”

What? Esther’s brow furrowed, “Wait, I was here when you got back from Bludhaven?” So, he hadn’t found her passed out somewhere. That means… Red Hood had brought her here last night. Red Hood had undressed her and cleaned her injuries.

“You don’t remember?” Dick arranged the food on their plates before throwing the dishes into the sink. His eyes squinted at her, “Are you okay? Did you take any bad hits to the head?” He sat next to her and moved to feel her head with the back of his hand; she blocked him with her arm. Dick paused. He’d almost forgotten that things weren’t normal between them.

It didn’t hurt Esther anymore, what he’d done to her. Those kinds of feelings for him were gone. But she didn’t want him to get his hopes up. She gave him a tight smile. “I got a little beat up last night. I think I might’ve taken one too many blows.” It wasn’t really a lie; she really had been beaten up last night.

“You don’t have Alfred stitching you up anymore, Essie; just make sure you have someone look at your injuries, okay? Regardless, I’m glad you came somewhere safe to rest up.” Dick sighed. They ate silently for a moment before he bit his lip, “So, it’s finally over? This crusade of yours?” Esther’s chewing slowed, “I mean, Joker is dead. That’s what you wanted, right?”

He wasn’t wrong. But all last night had done was beg even more questions. And the one over them all had still yet to be answered. “Joker was hired by someone to take Jay and me.” Esther chewed on her eggs, “I still haven’t figured out who. It’s not over until I do.”

“I was afraid you’d say something like that.” He grumbled, “Why can’t you just come home, Essie? Alfred’s driving himself crazy worrying about you. And Bruce-”

“Is having a hard time finding a batgirl replacement? Has he tried taking out an ad in the paper?” Esther responded snidely and Dick squeezed the bridge of his nose. She did feel a pang of guilt about Alfred, though.

“I already told you the situation with Tim, and he’s still got a broken nose from when you ran into him in the sewers a few weeks ago. He’s fourteen-”

“And we were twelve by the time we knew how to block a simple elbow attack.” Esther rolled her eyes, using her toast to casually soak up some of the yolks on her plate. “I’ve been taking it easy on him every time we’ve run into each other. Let him know that will stop soon if he can’t manage to land even one hit against me.”

Esther would be lying if she said she hated the kid. She hated Bruce for taking him on. It was truthful, however, that she didn’t hold back much when fighting the literal child. Esther didn’t want another dead Robin, and if this Tim kid couldn’t beat her, there were too many people who wouldn’t stop at a broken nose.

Dick knew this, of course. Esther had helped him and Bruce train Jason when he came along, and she used to do the same things to him even as children. That was, of course, until Jason grew to be taller than her, and she’d had to adjust her tactics. The point is that Dick Grayson knew that Esther could be harsh, but only when she felt it necessary.

It was one of the things he’d loved about her.

“I’ll tell him.” Dick gave in as he studied her face, drinking in Esther’s presence. It had been a while since they’d been this at ease around each other, even if they were arguing. “I- We just miss you. Things haven’t been the same in so long. It hasn’t really been a family since… you know.”

This would have made Esther fly off the handle a few days ago. But today? Today felt different. Joker was dead, and Jason… Jason was alive. Maybe. Yet to be confirmed. That black hole inside of her chest felt a little smaller today.

“Dick,” Esther glanced at his hand on the table before placing her own on top of it. Dick’s breathing stopped. “I know you can’t understand this, but when I watched Jason die, Esther Wayne died too. She’s gone. I’m just… Whatever remains.”

Dick nodded. He’d always known that to be true, yet as she held his hand for the first time in over a year, Dick felt like maybe whatever remained of Esther Wayne was still worth fighting for. She had this confidence about her, a spirit Esther had never had before.

He tried not to remember that that confidence was from killing people.

Esther squeezed his hand and sighed, “I’ve been meaning to talk to you for a while, but with everything that happened last night, I need to tell you this now.” Dick swallowed in anticipation, “Dick, I forgave you a while ago for moving on when the Joker had me.”

Dick Grayson choked on his own air. “Y-you did?” He sputtered, and Esther nodded, unphased by his typical inability to function as an ordinary adult man. Once upon a time, she’d found it adorable. Now she found it a little… exhausting.

“Don’t get that look in your eyes, Dick.” Esther took a bite out of the apple slices on her plate, “When we were together, I betrayed myself so many times before you ever betrayed me. How could I have asked you to be true to me when I was never true to myself?”

“Essie-” Dick couldn’t look her in the eyes.

Esther motioned for him to wait, “I gave up so many pieces of me to be with you.” She gestured around the apartment which was covered in Christmas decorations. “I bought all these two years ago… I hate Christmas.” Dick opened his mouth to protest, but Essie continued, “I know you didn’t ask me to. But that’s what I mean. I wanted to be a girl you wanted so badly that I willingly gave up on just being me.”

There was a moment of quiet as Dick looked at her. Esther Wayne had changed so much in more ways than one. It felt almost like he was meeting her for the first time, yet it also felt like she was somehow breaking up with him again?

And then she did something unexpected. Esther smiled. “All of this, despite how terrible it’s been, made me not want to hide anymore. Even if I have to physically hide to do so.” She laughed.

“It sounds like you’re dumping me, which is honestly impressive, seeing as we haven’t been together for over a year now,” Dick smirked.

“Look at me,” Esther commanded softly, and he obeyed, finally looking into her dark gray eyes with his ocean blue ones. She was still so beautiful, even after all this time. “I’ve known you longer than anyone. I hope… One day we can be friends again.”

She removed her hand from his as Esther stood to clean off her plate, but Dick wished she’d have held it just a few moments longer. He watched as Esther washed her dish, thinking to himself how much he wished they could go back to being more than just friends. Just one more chance.

“Well, we can be a family again, too, if you’re still here when Bruce arrives.” He jested and watched as she bristled.

“Hard pass.” Esther grumbled, “Which reminds me. I can’t exactly leave here in pajamas or in my bloody suit, so….”

Dick Grayson rolled his eyes, “I think I have some of your old clothes packed away.” He gestured for her to follow her, and as he walked towards his closet, Dick wished she wouldn’t take them. She was slowly disappearing from this place, and Dick feared the day Esther was completely gone.

The day Esther wouldn’t need him anymore.

…

Esther smoothed out the fabric of her pants as she walked down the apartment building stairs. These were actually clothes she’d bought herself that her old stylist had never let her wear.

There was a mirror on one of the landings, and Esther stopped to look at herself. Her hair was still short since the Joker had cut it the year prior, but now she’d styled it into a shaggy mullet.

For most of her life, someone told her what to wear and how to look. Bruce had turned her into a pop icon like she was nothing more profound than a Kardashian. It had been a good cover; who’d suspect the ditsy socialite to be a midnight vigilante? Yet it seemed unfair; Bruce Wayne got to be a bachelor that was also a genius businessman.

Esther Wayne adjusted the oversized t-shirt that was layered over a loose hoodie. Her tan cargo pants were extra loose on her since she’d lost weight from when she’d purchased them. And the converse taken were a pair Esther had bought two days before the Joker took her. She’d never gotten to wear them.

It felt good to look in the mirror for once and like what she saw. The past year had been nothing but comfortable clothes she could fight in, and the years before that were spent in clothes so tight she could hardly breathe. For once, looking in the mirror, Esther saw only her.

The clock on the wall of the hallway caught her attention; there were mere minutes before Bruce was supposed to arrive. Esther swallowed hard; she needed to stop wasting time.

Bolting down the stairs, Essie gripped the straps of the backpack that held her suit and weapons. Dick had given her one of his old college bags, but the Khopesh had barely fit, and the blade was poking into her back.

Just as her feet hit the pavement outside, she noticed the reporters. Damn. Esther had walked right into that.

“The anonymous tip said he’d be here any minute-”

An annoyingly familiar voice caught her attention, and before Esther could slip away, Vicki Vale made eye contact. Double damn.

“Esther Wayne?” Vicki’s voice was surprised but coy. Esther loathed this woman. But Esther had no time to tuck her tail and run before the cameras were snapping pictures of her. She blinked from the bright flash.

“It’s literally the middle of the day.” Esther used her fingers to shield herself from the lights, “Why the flash?” Her tone was irritated.

Vicki stepped towards her and looked Essie up and down. “We haven’t seen you in a while. I heard from a little birdy that you ran away to South Korea to study abroad. You look… Erm, different.”

Hmm. That must have been the story Bruce came up with to explain her absence. “Uh, gamsahaeyo?” Esther replied she’d learned Korean as a kid. Along with a couple other languages. She didn’t excel in many school subjects, but Essie had a knack for languages. “And is it considered ‘running away’ to study abroad these days? Wow, Gotham’s changed so much.” She feigned an airy voice and Vicki squinted. It wasn’t hard to tell that Esther was mocking her.

Vicki glanced at the building behind Esther before smirking, “A bit early in the morning to be at Dick Grayson’s apartment, isn’t it?” Esther internally rolled her eyes. “Can Gotham assume its favorite love birds are giving it yet another go?”

“No.” Esther snapped at her; for years, Vicki had made it her personal vendetta to embarrass her to the city, but Esther wasn’t pretending to be an airhead anymore. She was sick of it. “How about you and Jack Ryder? Married yet? Or are you still holding on to that engagement ring while he’s getting mouth fucked by the secretary under his desk on the morning news?”

Vicki gaped. Esther Wayne had always let her step all over her; it was part of the charade. Vicki didn’t realize she’d been in over her head for years. “Why, you little-”

“Vicki, always a pleasure. Glad you got to catch my little sister on her way back from the airport.”

Triple damn.

Vicki Vale had held Esther up, and time was out.

Bruce Wayne had made his way around Vicki’s crew and placed a firm hand on Esther’s shoulder. His grip was incredibly tight and sent a clear message. There’s no running.

Vicki was caught off guard and rushed to speak, “Mr. Wayne, what do you have to say about the news this morning? Since Joker’s presumed death, Wayne's stock value has increased by twelve percent. What do you believe the connection of that to be?”

“I’d love to set up an interview sometime. But as you can see, my sister is tired, and I’d really like to have a word with her after months apart...” As Bruce spoke, Esther blurred out whatever he was saying. It was probably something generically charming anyway.

Why did the reporters only ever ask her about dating and fashion while Bruce got asked questions about the company? Esther held only one share less than her brother. Just another thing that pissed her off.

Those thoughts were cut off as Bruce’s hand pulled her back into the apartment building. Before the door shut behind her Esther turned around and threw Vicki the middle finger, “Najung-e, gaenyeon-a!”

The moment the doors shut behind Bruce and he’d checked that the coast was clear, that dashing smile disappeared. To anyone else, his expression might have looked blank, but the pulse in his temple told Esther a very different story.

Bruce was livid.

“Was it you-?”

“No.” Esther smacked his hand off of her shoulder. Bruce towered above her, and once upon a time, seeing him this angry with her would make her recoil, but now, after everything, she found it almost funny. “I didn’t do it. But I wish I had.” Her lip curled as she snarled at him.

“You don’t get it.” Bruce’s tone was dangerous, but Esther didn’t waver. “This city is about to be torn apart as every Crime Boss in Gotham fights over the Joker’s turf. And maybe you didn’t kill Joker, but explain to me why I found Bane’s body floating in the Gotham river.”

Esther hesitated, “That-”

“Don’t say it wasn’t you. I checked dental records against the chunk bitten out of his neck, and yours was the only match.” Bruce glared down at her, and Esther finally looked away. “I see you’re taking this ‘wolf’ thing a little too literally.” Oh, that was rich coming from him.

“I didn’t have a choice.” Esther said, “He was about to pop my head off like a barbie doll.” The air in this lobby smelled like dust and pennies; it made her head ache. “I- I wasn’t really a match for him.”

Bruce scanned her body. Sure enough, Esther looked roughed up. She hunched slightly to the side, indicating that she probably had a bruised rib. “There’s always a choice, Esther. I trained you better than this. You know what you’re choosing.” He grumbled. Esther looked sick, her skin a bit paler than usual. There was a slight red rash creeping up her neck. “Did you ingest Bane’s Venom when you bit him?”

Esther’s ear twitched at the tinge of concern in his voice. “I’m fine. It wears off in a couple hours.” His words about Gotham becoming a war zone had struck a chord. She’d thought Joker hadn’t gained enough influence for that to happen, but that was just hopeful thinking.

“If you didn’t kill Joker, then who did?” Bruce inquired an edge to his voice again. “It could be someone more dangerous than Joker.”

“What?” Esther’s eye twitched, “More dangerous than Joker? What a fucking joke. I’m sorry. Are you just upset cause someone murdered your soulmate?” She felt bad as soon as she said it, but sometimes it was hard not to believe that Bruce was just as obsessed with the Joker as Joker was with Batman. Esther sighed, “I can’t tell you.”

And that was true. To tell Bruce would put him on the Red Hood’s trail. On Jason’s trail. She couldn’t do that without knowing what Jason’s game plan was or Esther risked ruining it.

Bruce glared at her, “So now we don’t just murder people, we’re protecting other killers too? Where is the line going to be drawn, Esther?”

Now the vein in Esther’s forehead was pulsing. “Not everything in Gotham concerns you, Bruce. Especially when you won’t take the steps necessary to keep Gotham safe. And I only kill people who deserve it-”

“Who are you to decide that?”

“If they line themselves up with people like Joker, that’s all the evidence I need-”

”Killing people isn’t going to bring Jason back, Esther.”

“You wanna bet?”

The air in the lobby went thick at her last couple words, their voices had raised significantly, and Esther was on her tiptoes with her chin up, her stare unrelenting when she realized what she’d just said.

“And what is that supposed to mean?” Bruce squinted.

“Nothing,” Esther grumbled, turning on her heel to leave.

“Where are you going? We’re not done here.” Bruce grabbed her arm, and Esther ripped it aggressively from his grasp.

“What’re you going to do, arrest me?” They both knew that wasn’t possible. To arrest Esther would mean exposing Bruce Wayne as Batman. “Give Alfred my love. It’s been a pleasure, as always.”

And with that, Esther took one last look at her fuming older brother before ducking out of the room.

…

Gotham was buzzing.

The Joker was dead. Sure, not all of the city’s problems were gone, but one of the cruelest, worst ones was.

People were smiling on the street, stopping to show friends the article on their phones. Esther couldn’t walk ten feet without hearing people talking about it.

A part of her was still upset about someone else killing him. If it really had been Jason last night, she supposed he deserved to be the one to kill Joker. But didn’t she deserve it a little bit too?

Esther had circled a couple different blocks to be sure Bruce wasn’t tailing her, and she’d checked twice to see if he’d left any bugs or trackers. After pulling one off her book bag, it seemed she was in the clear.

Gotham, in the daylight, was a completely different place.

The dusting of snow was turning to slush on the busy streets, and city workers rushed to put up final Christmas decorations for the upcoming parade.

During the daytime, Esther was often asleep, researching new leads, training, or working undercover to infiltrate different crime families. But today, she was simply walking around the city. She found herself down at the docks, walking along the old wooden piers. Esther had been here many times in the past. Often with someone by her side.

“If you don’t stop laughing, someone’s going to call the cops.” Jason clamped a hand over the squirming girl’s mouth.

Esther Wayne stared at him through half-lidded eyes, her chest shaking from her giggles. “Mmkay.” His hand muffled the word, which he removed as her body stilled a bit.

The two teenagers were sitting in a small paddle boat underneath the dock. Jason had packed it with blankets so they wouldn’t get cold. A trick he’d come up with a while back after this had become a regular spot for them to go.

It wasn’t too cold that spring night, just a bit wet from the morning's rain. Esther reached across Jason’s lap and snatched the joint from his fingers, quick to take another draw before flicking the dead bud into the water.

“Oh, nice.” Jason rolled his red-tinged eyes, “You always take the last hit.”

“And you always take twice the hits that I do.” Esther fired back, stretching her legs along the bottom of the boat, reveling in how extra soft the blankets felt against her skin.

Jason ruffled her hair, “It’s not my fault that you’re a lightweight.”

“It’s not my fault that you grew to twice my size last summer. Fucking giraffe.” Esther’s laugh rang through the dock again, and this time she clamped her own hand over her mouth, “Be quiet, Esther.” She scolded herself, causing Jason to laugh with her.

“I don’t get it.” Jay reached into his backpack and pulled out a bag of cheese Bugles and two silver Rockstars. She raised an eyebrow at him, urging him to go on. “Why are you only a little shit with me?”

Esther snatched up her drink and huffed, “One: You know I like the red one, and you always get the stupid silvers. And two: I don’t know what you’re talking about.” The can hissed as she popped it open and took a long gulp.

Jason did the same before staring at her. The red around his iris only served to make the green in his eyes a little more vibrant. “Oh, come on. You totally pretend to be someone else all day, but at night when it’s just us, You’re so fucking weird.” He laughed, subconsciously pulling one of the blankets up to sit around Esther’s waist a little bit higher in case she was cold. When Esther gave him an incredulous look, Jason smirked. “You’re telling me that you’d smoke weed with Dick?”

Shame pulled at Esther’s heart, “So what? That’s a normal thing to keep private.” But she knew he was right.

“Okay, different example. Vicki Vale on the way to school this morning. She literally asked what your advice to other ‘abnormally tall’ teenage girls was. Now, the Esther I know would have commented about how she was wearing the same clothes from yesterday’s afternoon news, but instead, you smiled like a dweeb and said, ‘just wear styles flattering to your body shape'.” Jason raised the pitch of his voice to imitate hers, and Esther stifled a laugh.

“Vicki Vale is a vile bitch who’s dating Jack Ryder. On a scale of one to ten of hotness, that douchebag Ryder is an imaginary number. So I wouldn’t exactly say she’s winning at life.” Esther stuck her tongue out at the thought of that little witch before grabbing a handful of Bugles and shoving them into her mouth.

“That’s exactly what I mean!” Jason said, “When it’s just you and me, you say fucking funny shit like that. But you’re a goody-goody all over again if anyone else is around.” Jason wondered silently where he fell on her ‘hotness scale’.

Esther shrugged, “I don’t know, Red.” She drowned her Bugles with her energy drink, wishing they hadn’t burned through that joint so quickly.

He had a point, though. Whenever she tried to be herself at home, she seemed to let other people down. ‘Esther, chill out.’ ‘Esther, act like a lady.’ And then there was Dick. She wanted him to notice her so badly, to see her as someone worthy of his time. Esther loved when he talked to her about improving herself and how hopeful he spoke of her. His attention felt like a gulp of air in her otherwise drowning existence.

Silence fell over them, but that was okay. They often sat quietly, neither feeling the need to say unnecessary words. After a moment, Esther heaved, “I just want to be easy to understand.” Jason snapped his attention to her, studying her face as Esther glared at the label of her Rockstar. “Whenever I’m ‘just me,’ everyone says something like, ‘I don’t understand you’ or ‘why are you like this’?” She said, “Don’t they know that hurts?”

Jay could hear the strain in her voice. He hadn’t meant to kill the vibe, but this had been on his mind for a while. “But you’re ‘just you’ when it’s the two of us?”

There was a moment as Esther considered that before a smile snuck onto her lips. “Well,” Suddenly, she threw her arms around Jason’s shoulders and placed a saccharine kiss on his cheek, “That’s because you’re my soulmate, Jason Todd.”

Red rushed into Jason’s cheeks, his face burning up. That was weird. He didn’t usually get bashful like that. Normally he’d push her off and tell her how annoying she was. This time though, he savored the moment for just a second. “Whatever, loser.”

It was starting to snow again, snowflakes floating all around Esther, a few landing on her dark lashes. That memory felt so bittersweet.

As Esther walked along the Gotham River, she felt a bit silly. Stupid, even. It had always been so apparent that Jason liked her.

The cold started to nip at her bare fingers when the burner phone in her pocket buzzed. Esther pulled it out and read the text she’d just received.

“So, are you dead? J’s been all over the news today but I haven’t heard from you. Let me know, xx.”

That’s right. Esther had never gotten back to her secret ally since they told her Joker’s location the night before. Essie quickly typed out a reply and sent it back.

“Alive.”

Her phone buzzed again a moment later.

“Always a lady of many words. That’s what I love about you. Drinks to celebrate?”

Esther blinked. Up until now, it had been strictly business with this person. But now that Joker is dead, a celebration might be in order. And it might not hurt to see if they had some intel on Red Hood, so she could start to piece together what Jason was playing at.

“Sure.” Essie slicked send and rolled her eyes at the text she received next.

“Wear something black and sexy.”

…

Damn, this bar was sleazy, but Esther had come to expect that from her contact at this point.

Esther’s body was exhausted. She’d gotten caught up earlier doing errands to do this meet-up that she hadn’t had any time to go back to her hideout and rest up or drop off her stuff. Which is why the backpack she’d placed behind the bar was literally bursting at the seams with her shit.

The bar was dark and grungy. The loud music made her head pound. At least her rashes had gone away, though.

Esther knew better by now than to ignore this contact’s requests, which is why she’d gone and bought some black clothes on the way here. A pair of low-rise baggy cargo pants (she was getting quite the collection of cargo pants), an oversized NASCAR jacket, and a bralette as a top. The all-black ensemble made her pale skin glow in the bar's red lighting.

The contact wasn’t here yet, and Esther adjusted the black bandana covering her head. It’s not like Esther could meet up with this person without being in disguise. Which is why she’d had to go and get some heavy makeup done, buy brown eye contacts, and why she had to wear these stupid fake nails.

As Clark Kent would say, ‘people don’t notice half of what you think they do,’ which is why he could slap on a pair of glasses and no one could figure out that he’s Superman.

This was why with a lot of contouring, a heavy black eyeshadow, a bold lip, and an annoying pair of sunglasses, no one had recognized her as Esther Wayne. Just a weirdo who wore sunglasses at night.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t my favorite vigilante.” The heavy Gotham accent dripped with confidence, and Esther watched as Harley Quinn slid into the chair next to her.

Some explanation might be helpful here. A few years back, Bat-Girl had been tipped off that Harley Quinn was going on a murder spree through Bludhaven. So Esther had shown up where Harley was hiding, only to find her a hysterical mess, her face heavily beaten up.

The Bat-Girl had chosen to take mercy on her and sat down and talked to her. Only to find out that Harley had been abandoned by the Joker only to find out that she was pregnant. Esther remembered sitting there, knowing all the horrible things Harley had done, yet felt nothing but pity for her.

So Esther had helped Harley find a safe, discreet clinic to get treatment and would check in on her as Bat-Girl every so often. When Joker took her and Jason, Harley tried to help Batman locate Bat-Girl.

After going rogue, Esther revealed only to Harley that She-Wolf had once been Bat-Girl. Harley Quinn was helping her to get revenge on the people who tormented Esther, but a strange friendship had bloomed between them.

“You know, one of these days, you’re going to stop comin’ here in that get-up. I pinky-promise I won’t tell no one who you are.” Harley whined, her pale white skin practically glowing in the dimly lit room. She said this every time they saw each other. “If you’re rollin’ your eyes, I can’t tell.”

Esther had been.

Harley was in a skimpy reflective black dress, her tattooed body on full display. The one thing Essie had always been jealous of Harley for was her confidence. Harley certainly never felt ashamed of her body. Although Harls was definitely toned down seeing as she was a wanted woman.

“So, did you just want to match or..?” Esther nodded to their twinning black get-up.

“It’s a funeral, BFG!” Harley giggled, “Rest in sufferin’, Mr.J!” The white-blonde-haired woman was beaming, but then, when wasn’t she? She reached over the bar and pulled out a bottle of vodka, “Put it on my tab, Steve. Let’s drink to that wretched old bastard!”

…

A few shots later and Harley’s fingers were inside Esther’s mouth.

“I don’t see any flesh chunks in there.” Harley pouted and stopped holding Essie’s mouth wide open. Essie flexed her jaw, her eyes becoming heavy. Truthfully, she didn’t really like to drink; it just made her sluggish. “You better not be pullin’ my leg, BFG.”

“I’m not!” Esther slurred a little bit. “It tasted so bad.” A question was nagging at her, though. “Why do you call me BFG?”

Harley Quinn laughed, “You’re the big friendly giant!” Usually, Esther would be mortified but somehow, coming from Harley, that was actually funny.

Essie covered her mouth as she chortled, “I’m only six inches above the national average.” She said before deciding now was as good a time as any to ask Harley some questions, “Hey, sidenote, have you heard anything about a guy calling himself Red Hood?”

“Aw, business talk?” Harley huffed, drowning another cherry-flavored shot. This woman was a tank. With a sigh, she set her shot glass down, “Yeah, he’s offered protection to some of the smaller mob families from Penguin, Dent, and Black Mask’s guys. In return, they give him a cut of everything and let him use their men. Enough have agreed that he’s risen the ranks pretty quickly. Rumor has it that Black Mask is especially pissed about it and is coming at the guy hard.” Her eyes narrowed, “Why?”

The music filled the silence as Esther bit her lip. “Anything else?”

“Uh ah.” Quinn shook her head, “No deal, BFG. I ain’t tellin’ you nothin’ more unless you tell me why. You’ve neva asked about him before. You two have a little run-in or somethin’?”

Esther tapped the side of her glass with her fingernail, her leg shaking under the bar. “I, uh, yeah, I mean, kind of.” She didn’t want to let Harley down by telling her it had actually been Red Hood that killed the joker.

“Oh my god.” Harley grabbed Essie’s arm suddenly; her face looked like it was going to split in two from her grin. “Ya want to fuck ‘im.”

“What?!” Essie practically screamed before clamping a hand over her own mouth. Esther’s face was turning a bright shade of pink. “No!” She whisper-yelled.

“Come on, BFG. When was the last time you were fucked?” Too damn long ago, but Harley didn’t need to know that. “If ya need to get laid that bad, I can always hook ya up with a friend of Ivy’s. It’s a plant, but, ya know, if you’re that desperate-”

“Harley, please, it’s not like that.” Esther pleaded, taking another shot to forget this absolutely mortifying moment. “I-I, I’m not in the mental space for that kind of thing.”

“Why not? ‘Cause of Robin?” The moment Harley said it, the other girl went silent.“‘Cause ya loved ‘em?”

As if Esther could turn any redder, “Harls, no. It- It was never like that-”

“I know what ya said. He was your best friend before Mr.J killed ‘em. But let me ask ya somethin’; In the past year, after all this time killin’ in the name of your dead friend, have ya even thought about datin’?”

No. Of course not. Losing Jason had consumed her. He’d died without her ever knowing how it would’ve felt to be loved by him. That tormented her every night. To even think about dating at the moment felt hollow and cold.

Her expression must’ve tipped Harley off to the answer, “Right, that’s what I thought. And I’m willing to bet it’s cause you’ve been in too much pain to even consider it?” When Esther nodded, Harley sighed longingly, “Only love hurts like that, sweetheart. Only love.”

This bar suddenly felt stuffy, like it was ten degrees too hot.

“I’ll tell ya about old Red Face but you gotta promise me you’re gonna get yourself some fuckin’ action.” Harley held out her pinky, and Esther begrudgingly hooked it in her own, “Mmkay. There is this other weird rumor. They say he’s workin’ fa someone. One of Falcone’s guys was tellin’ me that Red Hood’s boss has been real keen on that weird bakery that Falcone runs. He said, Red Hood’s been puttin’ some money into it and the business has been boomin’. Now.” Harley shifted in her seat, “I haven’t confirmed this yet, so don’t get ya panties in a twist, but I also heard that Red’s boss might be the same as whoever hired Joker to take you and the bird.”

“That’s true. I heard that myself.” Essie nodded but bit her cheek. She had known that but now, thinking about it, it didn’t make any sense. Why would Jason be working for the guy that hired the Joker to kill him? “That’s all?”

“That’s all.” Harley mimicked, “Jesus, I get no appreciation for all my hard work. Can we get plastered now?”

…

And plastered they got.

At least, Harley did. Esther just got relatively drunk. She hobbled around a little bit as she walked down the street alone.

Esther had walked Harley to her apartment that she shared with Ivy. Essie was, like, 85 percent sure that those two were fucking. The night air was undoubtedly below freezing, and it was still snowing. A thick layer of snowfall crunched beneath her feet.

This was Esther’s favorite time of year. The biting cold seeped into her bones; it pricked at her exposed skin. She must have looked crazy, walking the dark Gotham streets alone, but part of her dared someone to mess with her.

As she careened in the darkness, Esther pulled her bandana and sunglasses from her face, dropping them carelessly on the street. In her buzzed mind, Essie remembered that she’d put a makeup wipe in her pocket earlier. “Thank you, sober Esther.” She slurred, pulling it out and ripping it from its packet.

It’s not that Essie minded how the makeup looked, but she loathed how it felt on her skin. As it melted onto the cloth, the frigid air seemed to caress her face more fiercely.

The snow was now coming down in heavy flakes. As the cathedral came into view, Essie paused to look up at its gothic architecture. Sure, squatting in its attic wasn’t the ideal situation, but Esther couldn't think of a more beautiful sight on a night like this, with the snow reflected in the lamplight.

To be fair, she couldn’t really think, period. Her brain was so sluggish, and her stomach felt like it was in a dryer. Esther didn’t feel like digging through the backpack to find her grapple hook, and she also didn’t trust her tits to not fall out of this ‘top’ if she did so. Glancing at her watch, Essie decided it was late enough that all the nuns would be asleep. It was nearly midnight, after all.

Crossing to the west side of the building, Esther counted three windows to the left. This was the one she always purposefully left unlocked. It took a matter of seconds before she’d hoisted herself through the sill and silently closed it behind her.

Being careful to check around corners and be as quiet as possible, Esther stumbled up the flights of stairs, down the crowded storage room, and finally to the seemingly hidden door. It was warm in the church, so she slipped her leather racing jacket off her shoulders and carried it in her arms.

Brushing away cobwebs, Esther took a deep, exaggerated sigh of relief as she stepped into her haven. Only to freeze as a silhouette in the dim light startled her, but it took only a moment before she realized who was standing in her space.

Jason Todd.

He was in his Red Hood get-up, but his mask was sitting across the room on her desk. Jay was reading something, a red Rockstar in his left hand, a small notebook in the other. Essie recognized it immediately as her journal.

Desperately, Esther wanted to rush forward, smack it out of his hands, punch him, hug him… Do something to him. But she was frozen in place. Her jacket fell to the floor by her feet.

“Nice place.” Jason turned his head to look at her, eyes sweeping over her body. He bit the inside of his cheek as Jason took in the sight of her: Rosy cheeks, disheveled hair, and dressed like she had someone to impress. “And it’s rude to stare.” He said.

There was no helping that. How could she not stare at him? Esther had once believed she would never see his face again, those green eyes, that mischievous smile. He looked exactly as she remembered, and yet, a little bit different. Jay’s black hair now flaunted a white patch just above his left eyebrow, and he looked somehow even taller than she recalled. Maybe even… a little older?

Esther tried to muster words, something, anything. But nothing came. Instead, Esther quietly closed the door and dropped her bag on the floor next to her jacket. Her body swayed a little as she stepped towards him, her legs unsure.

This didn’t go unnoticed by Jason, who set his drink down on the floor. “Have you been drinking? Jesus, Essie, I’d hoped you’d spent the day resting.” His words landed on deaf ears as Esther took a few more slow strides until she stood inches away from him. Jason was completely facing her now, looking down to see her eyes wide and her lips parted. A part of him worried she was in shock again.

Esther’s fingers gradually rose, her breath hitching as they grazed his cheek. His eyes never once looked away from hers as she traced the white ‘J’ on the right side of his jaw.

Finally, as her flesh touched his, the words came out. “Jason?” It wasn’t much, just his name, but Jason’s eyes fluttered. He’d almost forgotten how sweet his name sounded, rolling off her tongue. God, she smelled like alcohol, but no part of his body complained. Rather the opposite, actually.

“Hey, Cabbage.” His tone was playful, and Jason’s ears rejoiced at the sound of a half-laugh falling from her lips. In the darkly lit room, however, Jay could see that despite her laugh, Essie’s lower lip was quivering, tears threatening to fall from her eyes. “Why the long face?” He teased.

Esther hesitantly pulled her hands back from him, her skeptical mind winning for a moment, “Tell me something only Jason Todd could possibly know.”

The Red Hood loomed over her, holding her gaze, “The field trip to Metropolis-”

“Okay!” Esther interrupted, her face turning a deep shade of scarlet. She could feel herself sobering up a bit, her brain fighting to take back control, especially at the mention of that horrendous day, “Okay, it’s you.” Her breath faltered at the words, and she bit back tears, “It’s really you.”

Jason Todd stood in front of her after so long of wishing and longing for him.

But he looked away, suddenly unable to meet her watery eyes, guilt eating away at him, “I know what you’re going to say, Esther. How could I be alive? How could I keep it a secret from you?” She must be furious at him; Jason wouldn’t be surprised if she started cursing him out. Honestly, he hoped she did. Watching her stare at him in silence was killing him, “Say something; I know you’re mad-”

He stumbled back as Esther flung herself against his body, her arms wrapping tightly around his midriff. “Red,” Her voice was muffled into his chest, “My Red.” The pitch of her voice gave away that she was crying, and Jason frowned.

Essie didn’t care that Jason had hidden from her? He couldn’t believe it, yet all Jason could hear in her voice was relief. Joy. Comfort. Jason’s frown relaxed, and he tightened his grip on her body, drowning his face in her soft black hair. The smell of her was intoxicating, especially after so long without it.

Her feet left the ground as Jason lifted her up, spinning her gently until a laugh bubbled up out of his chest. Jay laughed with her, his thoughts stilling for the first time in months as he held her in his arms.

When Jason set her down, Esther had a hard time pulling away. Part of her was afraid that if she let him go, she would turn away and he’d evaporate. Instead, she opted to hold his cheeks in her palms, grinning up at him with tears running down her cheeks.

Gloves hit the floor as he pulled them off to wipe the salt water from her face, “What prick made you cry, Essie? I’ll kick his ass.” The corner of his lips curled up in a teasing smile.

Essie laughed again. She’d laughed more in the past few minutes than she had in months. “How?” Was all she could muster to ask.

Jason sighed, gripping her shoulders and bringing her to sit down on the edge of her bed. He pulled the chair from her desk and placed it, so he was facing her, their knees touching and hands interlocking again.

Their friendship had always been exceptionally touchy, but now Esther couldn’t bear to not have some part of him connected to her.

“It’s… complicated.” Jason chewed on his lip, looking down at the ground. “I- I don’t really know where to start.”

“You died; start there.” Esther pressed, and Jason squinted.

“Well, see, that’s why it’s hard. Cause it technically started before then.” Esther stared at him expectantly and Jason continued, “It was them. The League of Shadows.”

The girl’s eyes narrowed at the mention of the League. They had been nothing but a source of pain and suffering in her life, and if she found out that they had something to do with all this, she wouldn’t rest until every last one of them was dead.

Jason saw the shift in her face, and he squeezed her hands, “Hold on, let me explain.” He said, “When we got taken, Ra’s al Ghul was in Gotham looking into some things. I guess Bruce was giving him too much trouble,” He spat Bruce’s name like a curse word. “So Ra’s needed a distraction. He was advised that Joker was the only one who could entertain Batman for an extended amount of time. But the Joker went off script and took us as his way of occupying Bruce. He probably didn’t realize how little we actually mean to that fucker.” Jason hissed.

Esther couldn’t say she blamed Jason for his strong feelings toward Bruce. After all, Esther, to this day, still wrestled with her anger towards her brother. And Jason didn’t even know about the Tim situation. It was probably better that he didn't.

His fingers toyed with hers, and she noticed a white line circling his middle finger. Wait, that had been the finger that Joker cut off. Was it… back? The line was definitely a scar, but if Esther remembered correctly, Joker had fed the finger to the rats. Her nimble fingers traced the white ring gently.

“When I… died, Ra’s swapped my body out a few days after the funeral. And, well…” Jason looked away, his leg shaking nervously, “He… dipped me into his Lazurus pit.”

The room went silent as Esther’s stomach flipped. So Jason really had died. And Ra’s al Ghul had brought him back. The pupils of her eyes fluctuated, and her gaze darkened, “But why? Ra’s doesn’t let just anyone use those pits.”

“It wasn’t in his plan for Joker to take us. He felt guilty, I guess.” Jason’s answer almost made her laugh. Ra’s al Ghul never felt guilty. But Jason seemed almost like he was… defending him.

Esther’s eyes widened, “So it’s true, you’re working for him, aren’t you?” His lack of an answer was all she needed, “Jason, Ra’s is a psychopath. I don’t know what he’s been telling you, but-”

Jason sighed in frustration, “It’s not what he’s told me.” His tone grew cold, “It’s what he did.” His eyes narrowed as anger filled his chest, “Bruce let us suffer in there. He let me watch you wither away; let me wither away. He did nothing.” His voice was poisonous, “I’m only alive because of Ra’s.”

“Yeah, but I don’t understand. Ra’s riled Joker up and then unclipped him from his leash, and now you’re working for him?” Jason’s lip stiffened at her words, and he dropped her hands. “Jason,” Esther’s fingers reached up and stroked the hair hanging in front of his face, her tone softening in an attempt to keep him calm, “You’re alive; that’s all I should ask for.” And, of course, Jay melted into her. How could he not? “But I need to know that there’s a game plan to all of this. A reason. ‘Cause I can’t say that it’s making much sense as of right now.”

The touch of her fingers in his hair was like ecstasy. Everything felt different than before his ‘death.’ Esther had been his best friend for so long, but he’d never really realized what he meant to her. Jason had watched from a distance as she fell apart, only to rebuild herself into something stronger. To see this level of relief in her eyes, to know what lengths she had gone through to get revenge in his name… He bit his lip in hesitancy.

“I just… Need to see some things through.” Jason relented but was quick to add, “But I… You can’t get involved.” Esther dropped her hands, Jay flinching at the sudden loss. Her expression told him everything, “I can’t tell you everything right now; it would only put you in danger.”

“Put me in danger?” Esther stood up from the bed and began pacing the room, “You of all people should know that that doesn’t concern me.” Her face was one that was more familiar to him now: stubborn. It almost made him smile. “None of this makes any sense. Ra’s brought you back to life and has you playing gangster in the streets. He sicked the Joker on us to distract Bruce, but now he’s just buying up fucking bakeries around the city? Like he's playing fucking Cooking Mama? I don’t buy it.”

Pushing the seat back as he stood as well, Jason suddenly looked agitated, “Essie, you need to stop looking into all of this.” He said firmly, “I’m serious. No more.” Jason closed his eyes, coming to the conclusion that coming here may have been a bad idea. It had been selfish, but he’d just so desperately wanted to see her.

“Why won’t you just let me come with you? I could help. Whatever it is that you’re trying to work out, Jason, I want to go with you.” Esther instinctively grabbed his hands, but he immediately tore them from her grasp.

“I… can’t get involved with you, Essie.” Jason swallowed hard, turning his back on her, making it as though he was going to leave. “It’s better for you if we pretend you never knew I was alive.”

Esther’s heart plummeted. He was going to leave her again? Just like that? Was it really so easy for him? Her words left her lips before she could even hope to stop them.

“Does that mean you don’t feel anything for me anymore?” The words hung in the air, Jay’s shoulders tensing up immediately. “I mean… I get it if you don’t… It’s been a long time, and so much is different. I just- It’s just that… what you said on day seventy-two, do you not feel that way anymore?”

The atmosphere felt like she could cut it with her khopesh. Jason turned around slowly, his lips curled up in an almost angry smirk. “Sometimes, Essie, your stupidity surprises even me.” Okay, ouch. That stung until Esther looked into his eyes and saw some mischievous fire burning inside them. “You really think that I’d go this long loving you, and something as trivial as dying could change the way I feel about you?”

His words melted her heart into a dripping, hot mess. He loved her. Jason Todd still loved her. After all this time. After all, that had changed. Through life and through death. He wanted her. The remains of her liquified heart leaked through her body and pooled in the pit of her stomach, twisting and turning there as her body reacted physically to what he’d said.

“But I just… I can’t, Essie. If I let you near me, you could really end up hurt. I don’t know when this will all be over, but… I don’t think I can see you again until it is for your own safety. There are a lot of things I’m willing to risk. But not you. Never you.” Jay’s tone had softened considerably, concern dripping off of his tongue. To hear him speak like this, in a way she’d never heard him talk to her before… Maybe it was the alcohol still running through her blood, but suddenly it felt like Esther’s skin was on fire.

Jay turned away again, unable to look her in the eyes.

Esther hated that. She hated every time he looked away. It wasn’t even twenty-four hours ago that Esther believed those eyes were gone forever. Esther didn’t want to lose sight of that forest green ever again. And for the past year that Jason had been gone, there’d been something that had been nagging the back of her head.

“I can’t do it again.” Her words came out quiet but clear. Yet, again, they stopped Jay dead in his tracks. When he turned back to Esther, there was a desperate look in her gray eyes. Jason studied her, silently wondering why he liked that subtly indignant expression on her pretty face. And not in a decent way.

“Do what?” Jason asked, his heart beating hard against his chest.

“I can’t go back to wondering what it would feel like to be loved by you.” It took every ounce of her courage to say those words. Esther was never the one to initiate anything, but she’d believed that opportunity to be missed, and now that she knew it wasn’t, Esther craved the chance to learn. “I’ve thought about it every day for over a year. Please,” She begged, “Don’t ask me to go back to that hell.”

Jason’s whole body was stiff as he watched her. He could hardly believe his ears. Never in his life did he think he would hear Esther Wayne beg for him. Jay could hear the blood rushing in his ears.

“Stop.” His eyelids drooped slightly; Jay’s resolve was not strong when it came to her. He could feel his pulse all over his body. “You can’t- Don’t do this to me.” His fingers ran through his black hair, tugging at his nape as if trying to ground himself.

But Esther saw it all. She was so close to getting what she wanted, and her body seemed to know it as Essie’s arms moved of their own accord; Esther’s fingers reached up and twisted behind her back, Jason watching every movement. A second later, the bralette that had been her top this evening hung loosely from her shoulders, the clasp in the back now undone and useless. “Please, Red,” That damned nickname, “Show me.”

And just like that, whatever fight Jason had left in him crumbled. “Fuck this.”

He’d waited too fucking long for this moment as he strode forward and crashed his lips onto hers. Jay’s arms pulled Essie’s body impossibly close to his, his muscles flexing as his fingers dug into the skin of her back.

Jason’s lips devoured her, and Essie arched her back to match his same energy. Fuck, the way his tongue swept against her bottom lip made her wonder what other places she wanted his tongue to be.

As Jay kissed her forcefully, he pushed her backward, the fingers behind her back pausing their exploration to rip the straps of her bra from her shoulders. The moment her chest was bare Jay froze once more, drinking this moment in.

How many times had he touched himself imagining this exact moment? How many nights had Jason hidden beneath his sheets, thinking about how perfect her tits probably were as he fucked into his own hand?

And younger Jason had been right. They were perfect. His rough fingers ran over her soft rose petals, Essie’s nipples stiffening at their slightest touch.

The desire to be touched by Jason was only building; Esther pushed herself into his palms, biting her bottom lip as she watched him soak in the vision of her bare breasts. She was becoming painfully aware of her quickly soaked panties.

This desire didn’t go unnoticed. Jay smirked down at her; her tits looked small and delicate against his big hands. “You think you’re so fucking clever.” He spat at her, his breathing thick and heavy, “You always get whatever the fuck you want.”

Esther’s hands sprawled against his chest, and she breathed out a soft “I want you.” That was all the consent he needed as he pulled the hair at the back of her head, forcing her to look up at him into his beautiful emerald eyes that she had missed more than anything.

Jay leaned down and let his lips and nose brush against the tender skin of her exposed neck and clavicle, “Then that’s what you’re going to fucking get.” His tone was low and gravelly; his words were a promise that he was more than willing to keep.

His free hand hooked into her pants and let them drop down to expose the pair of panties she’d been wearing. Jay’s eyes darkened. He could see the outline of her pussy against the thin, seamless undies.

With a soft push against her shoulders, Esther fell back against her mattress. Her eyes glimmered in the darkness as Jason peeled his top from his body. A look of shame crossed his expression for a moment, which she didn’t understand until her gaze trailed downwards.

Scars. From their torture but also an enormous t-shaped scar etched across his massive chest. The autopsy stitches. Essie’s eyes followed the white lines downwards. His body, despite the markings, oozed sex appeal. It was perfectly sculpted, and Esther bit back a whine.

The embarrassed look on Jay’s face dropped immediately as he watched Esther pull her bottom lip between her teeth, look up at him innocently, and slowly open her legs until her covered center was completely exposed to him. A clear invitation.

Jay growled, “You want me to wreck you, don’t you?” He sat on the edge of the bed after she nodded, and he forcibly grabbed her legs to pull her until she was laid out belly down across his lap. “Okay, sweetness, but remember, you asked for it.”

He was so dominant. Esther wasn’t used to it, but she’d be lying if she said she didn’t love how he was manhandling her. Jason threw her around like she weighed nothing to him, driving Essie wild.

His one arm snaked around her neck, steadying her against his chest as he brought his other hand to her face and traced her lips with his middle finger, “Suck.” He commanded, and Esther immediately obeyed, closing her eyes as she did. “Fuck. My little wild thing is being such a good girl for me.” Jay pulled his finger from her mouth and brought it down to her inner thighs, which Esther gladly parted for him. There was a little dark spot in the middle of her nude panties; her arousal getting the better of her.

Deciding he’d help relieve her a little, Jay pushed her underwear to the side and (pausing first to lick his lips at the sight of her pretty little pussy) sank his middle finger slowly and sensually into her cunt. Esther’s breath sucked in at finally being touched, where she craved it the most.

Her warmth surrounded his finger and Jason suddenly became very aware of how tight his pants were. Truthfully, his cock was aching, but there was nothing he wanted more in this world tonight than to see this woman’s body absolutely writhing around him, so that would just have to wait. Wait just a little bit longer.

Esther made a sound like a sigh of relief as he gently finger fucked her, her back arching up in satisfaction. Jason added another finger and sped up his pace, kissing Essie’s head as her body tensed. When his fingers curled inside her, Esther gasped, “Fuck.” She whispered, but Jay heard it.

“What was that?” Jason smirked, pausing his movements. Esther whimpered, and his grin only grew. “Did you have something you wanted to say?”

The lack of his fingers made Esther huff in frustration. This body had not been touched in an impossibly long time, and it hungered for release. “Red,” Jay’s dick twitched at the sound of his nickname, “Please.”

That begging was enough for him. Jay happily pushed his fingers into her dripping wet pussy, not so worried about being gentle anymore, his rough skin offering sweet relief, “Use your words, Essie, or I’ll stop.” His pace slowed down, and she knew he wasn’t bluffing.

But it was so hard to breathe, let alone speak. Essie was putty in his arms, her fingers digging into his skin, Jason could see her face turning red as Esther’s hips jutted in attempts to match his pace, those rosy, flustered cheeks drove him wild. “Please,” She started again, a strand of her hair falling into her face, “Jason, please just fuck me,” she whined with a desperation he could almost feel. The weight of her words dug deep into his chest, lighting up a red-hot desire that he could have only Dreamt of feeling.

How could he possibly turn her down?

Jason grabbed her by the waist, threw Essie off his lap, and pinned her down on the bed, her naked body pressed against the disheveled sheets. “I waited so long to hear you beg for me.” He groaned, using his knee to spread her legs underneath him. “I prayed so many times to show you what you were missing.”

“Show me.” Her voice was a raspy whimper laced with lust for the massive man above her.

Esther was desperate to feel his thick fingers roughly going in and out of her weeping cunt, her eyes looking up at him from beneath her dark lashes. God, she looked so pretty and fuckable. Jason ducked his head down, kissing a trail from her jaw down her chest; His tongue left a wet track on her skin, the cool air turning it electric. When Jay’s lips reached her tits, they had hardened and were surrounded by goosebumps.

That was it; Jason couldn’t take the strain of his dick against his pants. As he latched his lips onto her tender tit, Jay maneuvered his pants off and kicked them to the floor, now in nothing but his boxers, and even that was uncomfortable now.

Kissing down her midriff, Jason peeled his boxers off just as he came face to face with Esther’s sweet cunt. She was so gorgeous and perfect that he could just stare at her pussy for hours. His eyes glimmered as he looked up at her, his tongue slid across his upper lip achingly slowly, and Esther watched in strained anticipation. “Good thing you're a rich girl,” Jason smirked before tearing her panties to shreds in his massive hands.

There wasn’t even a moment to protest before Jay had latched his mouth to her wet folds, his eyes fluttering shut at her sweet taste on his tongue. God, this was better than he’d ever imagined it. Jason flexed his fingers roughly into the skin of her thigh as he held her open for him.

Esther’s feet pointed into a beautiful arch as her body squirmed at Jason’s tongue. She’d been eaten out before, but this… fuck. Jason acted as though this was his first meal in months and planned on savoring every moment.

“O-Oh shit.” Essie’s lips pouted as Jason slipped a finger into her warm cunt, her hands falling to grip his skunk-striped hair. That drove him fucking wild, his eyes snapping open to gaze up at her. And holy shit, was she a sight to see, her cream thighs squeezing around him. Her mouth fell open in a silent moan.

Silent wasn’t good enough for Jason. He wanted Essie to wake up the nuns sleeping on the bottom floor.

Jay’s tongue darted out and licked a long stripe along her pussy, the sensation drawing a sweet cry from Esther’s mouth. Jason was sure she was pulling his hair from his head, but that’s exactly how he wanted it.

His patience was running out as Jason’s cock dripped pre-cum onto the bed sheet beneath him. With a single push of his arms, Jay was at eye level with Essie again, interlocking their lips in a passionate kiss. Jay made sure she was able to taste her breathtaking pussy through the kiss. His breath hitched as her soft fingers traced his chest, so unused to the feeling of such caresses.

When they broke from their kiss, the head of Jason’s was pushing against her wet folds. Jason paused, “I should have asked this sooner, but… uh, do you… have a condom?”

“No.” Esther had an impish smile on her swollen lips, eyes sparkling, “I have an IUD.”

“Uh, a what?” Jason kissed the corner of Essie’s lips, loving that sly little smirk she wore.

Essie's expression was sultry and innocent at the same time. Jay had never seen anything like it. It made his cock twitch in anticipation as she brought her lips to his ear and whispered, “It means… that you can come inside me.” Her voice was like honey on fire, Sweet and hot.

A growl fell from Jason’s mouth as his Cock achingly throbbed in anticipation, and his large hands closed around her neck, “I was fucking hoping you’d say that.” His fingers tightened, tracing her lips with the rough pad of his thumb.

Jason’s other hand guided the head of his cock to her entrance, pausing to rub his tip against her clit. Electricity shot through Esther’s body as she let out the most beautiful and erotic moan he had ever heard. She pulled her lip between her teeth. Truthfully, she was nervous, Jason was… a lot bigger than she’d ever pictured… or experienced (Sorry Dick, but it’s true).

As if Jay sensed her hesitation, his thumb stroked her skin, and he placed a kiss on her pouty lips, “Relax, you can take it.”

Fuuuuuck. Essie nodded, knowing little else other than the fact that she needed Jason to be inside her. And he was going to oblige her.

The head of his thick cock pushed past her wet folds slowly, Jay’s eyes squeezing shut as he lost himself in the feeling of his dick being hugged by her tight cunt. “That’s it, sweetheart.” He groaned, already breathless, and Esther whimpered in pleasure at how full she felt. “Doin’ so good for me.” Jay opened his eyes as he bottomed out in her with an almost animalistic growl and took in the sight in front of him.

The bed sheets were sticking to Esther’s skin, and a thin layer of sweat covered every inch of flesh; her body glistened like fine silk. Essie’s hair had a damp look to it, sticking to her rosy face. Essie’s brows were scrunched up as she moaned out, “Jay-” Jason wanted nothing more than to sweep her into his arms and run away into the night with her forever. “Please, fuck me.”

Not losing a moment, Jason snapped his hips, eliciting a gasp from Esther, a gasp that turned into a low groan as he fucked into her roughly. Jay was losing his mind at the feeling of her tight walls around him. He couldn't compare the feeling of his longtime crush to anything else. “Oh, you feel even better than I imagined.” The words slipped from his lips, and Esther could barely process them as her body writhed underneath him.

He filled her up so well, hitting every spot inside her that she desperately needed him to. When Jason brought his fingers to play with her clit, Esther’s back lifted off the mattress, and her fingers clawed at his back. Jason didn’t mind a few more scars if they were from her. “Jason…” She couldn’t even finish her thought as he picked up his pace, and a string of curses tumbled from her tongue as she struggled to keep her mind from turning into mush as Jason's fat cock destroyed her insides in the best way possible.

“You like it hard, don’t you?” Jason smirked and decided he would give her exactly what she wanted. He adjusted his position, using both his hands to hold her hips up off the sheets before pounding into her harshly.

The new angle made her stomach twist, and Esther practically screamed Jason’s name, clamping her hand over her own mouth in an attempt to stay quiet. The sound of his cock penetrating her dripping cunt was absolutely sinful, and Esther felt her head go cloudy. “That feels so fucking good, Red.”

“Yea?” Jason grunted, slowing his movements, “I feel good?” Those innocent eyes never left his as Essie nodded. A devilish smile formed on his face as he rutted slowly and deeply into her, “Better than Dick?”

His words caught Esther by surprise, and she felt fire erupt in her blood, but just as Jay asked it, his slow penetrating stopped, and suddenly he was fucking her into the mattress, his hips snapping mercilessly against her. Esther struggled for breath, struggled to think. Jason was literally fucking the thoughts from her brain. “I, uh- oh, fuck- Jason!” Esther buried her face into his shoulder, whining against the sticky hot skin. She could feel her legs shaking around him.

His unrelenting pounding was all Essie could focus on until he released one hand from her hip to smack against her thigh, the sting sending waves through her core. “Am I, sweetheart? Am I fucking you better than he did?” Esther’s mouth fell open in silent moans, “I shared a wall with that fucker,” He spoke through his own heavy breaths, “How many times did I hear you two, knowing I could do it better.” Jay used his free hand to go back to his ministrations on her clit, Esther biting into her fingers to keep from screaming again. “Did he fuck you like this, Essie?”

“No!” Esther cried as her climax quickly approached, “No, Jason!” She squeaked, “You fuck me better. You fuck me so perfect.” Jason almost came right then and there; he fucking knew it. And he waited so long for her to admit it. He bit his lip and dropped her onto the mattress to pin her thighs to the bed with his hands. The sudden change in position was the last straw for Essie, “Jay, Red, I’m gonna cum!”

“Cum, sweetheart. Cum for me.” Jay felt Esther suddenly clamp her thighs around his body, her body lifting off the bed as she writhed in ecstasy. Her pussy pulsed and clamped around his cock, and Jason sucked his breath in through his teeth as he leaned down and grunted into her neck, “Fuck, Essie.” Her moans didn’t stop because neither had Jason. He was fucking her right through her orgasm.

Those gray eyes fluttered open, and he pushed the hair from her face, “Jay, please, cum inside me.” She begged, her fingers lacing into the hair at the nape of his neck.

With pleasure. Jason thought as he rutted into her just a few more times before groaning loudly and emptying his load deep inside her. Essie almost wanted to cum again at the feeling of his warmth spreading inside her, at the sight of Jason’s eyes squeezed shut, at the sound of squelching as Jason fucked her until his cum dripped onto the blankets.

He came for an impossibly long time; even as he pulled himself from her spent pussy, ropes of cum shot into her. Esther drew him in for a sloppy kiss, their bodies molding together in blissful completion. “Fuck.” Jason mumbled into the pillow behind her, shifting his body, so he wasn’t crushing her, but he left his fingers tangled in her hair. “I’d say you’re going to be the death of me, but you already were.”

It felt like her body was nothing but a puddle, but Esther laughed at his stupid joke. “You prick.” But her tone dripped with affection. Her neck couldn’t even support her head as it lulled to the side. Her eye caught on the Rockstar Jason had placed earlier on the ground, “How long did you tease me about liking the red one?” She grumbled, and Jason chucked.

“It goes with my suit.” He smirked, and Esther rolled her eyes. “Which,” Jason sighed, “I have to put back on.”

A frown etched itself onto Esther’s face, “Why?” Her arms tightened around his waist, and Jason wished more than anything that he could stay and make love to her all night.

“I’ve got an appointment with someone. I’m already late.” He rubbed at his face in exhaustion before sitting up and grabbing a t-shirt from the ground to wipe Esther off. “Trust me, if I didn’t have to be there, I’d be here with you.”

As Jay grabbed his suit and began to dress himself, Essie huffed, sitting up as well, “I’m coming with you-”

“No.” Jay’s tone was firm, not that that scared Essie. “I knew you’d say that.” His voice softened as he unclipped something from his suit and handed it to her. It looked like some kind of chip, “You need to sleep, you GMO-riddled broccoli.” She shot him a death glare which he ignored as he took the chip back and installed it onto her phone, “This is connected to my suits life support systems. If you get worried, you can look, and it will show you I’m okay.” Jay tossed the phone onto her lap.

Her phone lit up and showed the blank screen of a heart rate and blood pressure monitor. As Jason zipped up his suit, the screen suddenly came to life with his stats. “I could just follow you.” Esther griped, and Jason rolled his eyes. He knew she wouldn’t; Essie looked absolutely destroyed. A fact he was pretty proud of. “What if you need to make a quick getaway?” She challenged.

“I’ve got a bike for that.” Jason downed the rest of his previously forgotten drink and clipped on all of his weapons. “I’ve been doing this alone for months, Essie, just like you. But if I think you’re out there trying to find me, I won’t be able to focus. And then I will get hurt.” Jay knelt by the side of the bed, “I promise you, I will be here when you wake up.” He pressed a kiss to Esther’s warm forehead, his hands stroking her naked thigh before laying a blanket sweetly over her.

Essie grumbled in defeat, holding her phone close to her chest, “Fine.”

“Good girl.” Jason grinned, standing up and walking to the latch that led to the bell tower, “I’ll bring you back a menorah. I’m shocked you don’t already have one.” His voice shifted as he put his mask on, the voice scrambler activating. “We’re four days into Hanukkah already, you poser.”

His jab made Esther laugh into her pillow; her eyes suddenly felt so, so heavy. “It’s called a hanukkiyah.” She grumbled, barely hearing what Jason Todd said before disappearing from the room.

“I missed you so much, Esther Wayne.”

…

Once again, Esther was stirred from her peaceful sleep by the warm beams of sunlight that flooded through the small stained glass window at the apex of the roof. This time, however, Esther felt no urge to stay asleep. Because this time, Jason Todd would be in bed next to her.

Essie reached out her arm and searched for the other body that was supposed to be in bed with her. But all she found were empty sheets. Her eyes shot open and Esther sat up in an instant, scanning the bed and then the room.

There was no sign of Jason. No indication that he’d even returned that morning. Her breathing went rapid as Esther swallowed hard. Jason Todd never broke promises. Not once in all her years of knowing him.

Snatching her phone from where it had laid beside her in her sleep, Esther flicked it on and felt the blood freeze in her veins as the screen blinked red and showed dangerously chaotic vitals. Vitals that were dropping.

Fuck.

tags: @niphredil-14 @honeybee54321

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